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evilminji · 1 month

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Been Watching Weird Fruit Explorer(?)... and I just...

W-Who let Bored Danny have BooTube?

Sorry, YOU-Tube. He has TWO Apps now. BooTube is bigger. Way more random, yet... somehow more niche? Meh. It's what happens when you get billions of billions of people who all have their own Obsessions to rant over, on a site.

Ember's channel is pretty lit, tho, ngl.

He stopped using YOU-Tube almost overnight. Too many ads, weird algorithmic pushiness. No thanks. It was too small and too "trying to take my money". You know?

Buuuuut? See.... TUCKER is the Tech guy.

Coding and that sort of stuff. HE does hands on work. You want a toaster? He can MAKE you a toaster! With LAZERS! Runs off The Goo! But a program? Eeeeeeeh? Hit it with hammer maybe? Monkey make fire? Hit with stick? Blergh.

Yeah, he can SORTA push through.

But he suuuucks.

And like... he had a headache, okay? His project had just, quiet literally, exploded in his face. So when he looked at his phone? All the apps were blobs. He clicked the one that LOOKED kinda right. Shoved his arm in his phone and brute forced a channel set up.

He figured he could ramble about Space!

It's not like he cared is anyone LISTENS or not! It's a "for him" thing, you know? Like a diary. But more... putting on a ☆~show~☆?

So he rambles from the floor of his Lair's Lab, crashs and wails in the distance, green sky occasionally visible as he lazily floats by windows. Dropping... juuuust past human knowledge understanding of Space. Talking like he's STUDYING somewhere. Referencing PAPERS no human will ever be able to find.

But a few they WILL.

Some of which, are currently? Only half written.

But then? Oh YEAH... he should eat! You know... Sam keeps bringing him fruits and veggies and stuff from her internship at that Botanical Lair. Stuff never seen before of Earth. Or hasn't been seen in centuries.

Again, like, a FEW that? Randomly? Have???

He picks up something sharply purple, bright orange insides. Crisp crunch. He makes a face. And starts to ramble about it, distracted from Space. "Weirdly mushroom-y" he notes. "Kinda bubblegum sweet? But like... CHEAP bubblegum. Like it hits you all at once and is kinda chemically. But it disappears real fast? Huh. Spicy too..."

It's the first video on the Playlist. One of hundreds. Two of the green Lanterns RECONIZE that fruit ad HIGHLY toxic to humans, can't recognize what planet they're seeing. Or how this alien teen got himself on YouTube.

He seems... unaware of how incredibly famous he's become.

But his strange techno Pharoah friend has not. HE is both perfectly aware and apparently amused. Has taken to feeding him rare and hazardous flora and fauna, to see if it tastes good.

....there have been an alarming number of plants from dead planets.

And the comments the kid makes? Alarming as hell.

Sam's just pleased everybody's getting their greens. Danny's glad him n tuck get to hang and do "try weird foods and fuck around, bro time". They've made lazers! Talked about stuff! Debated why Martian Manhunter is THE superior Justice League member.

Danny understands. Wonder Woman is a BAMF. But he's biased, Tucker. He doesn't CARE if she has a sword and flowy, impressive locks! Shape-shifting telepath! From MARS!!! *imaginary mic drop*

And Tucker? Is conquering the YouTube scene with this charming, weird, relatable young alien. Who rambles about Space, debates nerd stuff, eats weird plants and describes them, and makes sci-fi technology! Theme? WHAT THEME? Phantom is a weird channel, man. You never know what you'll find!

And no one can get rid of it.

Believe them, governments have TRIED. Censorship? Not possible. Not without removing the whole SITE.

#dpxdc #dp x dc #dc x dp #dcxdp #minji's writing #bootube to youtube au #internet famous au

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bones4thecats · 3 months

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What If They Were Fathers?

Type of Writing: #5 - Poll Result Characters: Bonten! Manjiro Sano, Sanzu Haruchiyo, Kakucho, and Hajime Kokonoi Name: What If They Were Fathers? Original Poll Link: Here

A/N: The Reader is FEMALE in this, since they're pregnant and whatnot.

WARNING! This contains: Mentions of drugs, overdoses, alcohol addiction, and drug addiction

Spoilers for: Bonten Arc

✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅

🍵 It shocked Mikey enough that you still loved him even though he wasn't the same happy-go-lucky boy he was years ago, instead, he grew into a emotionless and dead-appearing individual

🍵 So, when he heard that you were pregnant, he'd be lying if he said he didn't feel a small bit of love grow inside his now cold-heart

🍵 Mikey was very good when it came to caring for you during your pregnancy, he would have the others go get you things you needed, since he suspected someone was after him and you

🍵 After all, being pregnant slows down a woman from whooping ass

🍵 It was surprising, but, when you went into labor and you were yelling at him as he tried calming you down, Mikey stayed as calm as ever

🍵 He would slightly flinch at the loud screams of pain you let out, and he was honestly kinda scared he may lose you when the gang's doctor rushed you to lay down and stay calm

" Mr. Sano, sir, would you like to hold your baby? "

🍵 Looking behind him, he stared at his first child, a son, and he felt a shimmer of happiness and sadness rush through him at the same time, it reminded him of when he first met Emma, how he cared for her automatically without any reason

🍵 As he held your baby, he let a tear rush down his cheek as you chuckled at his small moment of vulnerability, something he swore he would never show was in-fact showing, he was still human inside

🍵 Now, while your son grew up, Mikey was a hint of a helicopter-father, he runs a very dangerous organization, one that is being hunted by authorities constantly, and he had enough to do when worrying about you, but, his son was so similar to younger him

🍵 The boy would run up to strangers and make them laugh without a care in the world as Mikey would hide himself deeper in a hoodie while you got your son back to you guys

🍵 But, despite many beliefs, he's a decent father

🍵 Mikey would put some things behind and would play with his son, for example, if his son wanted to mess around with some sock puppets and make a story, Mikey would indulge him and mess with him, making his voice deepen and rise for his son's laugh to erupt

🍵 He does have his faults though, as his work can end up making his son mature faster than a child should, or he could end up saying or doing something that upset you, making his son start disconnecting with him

🍵 Overall, he's a 7.5/10 father, he's good in certain situations and bad in others

🔪 Sanzu and you have known one another for years, planting the first time you ever met nearly 10 years prior to this one

🔪 When he went through the years of torturous addictions, whether it be to alcohol or drugs that he somehow got a hold of through means even you didn't know of, you were always there to pull him away

🔪 Because of those issues, he had no idea why you settled for him of all people, you were so beautiful, you could've gotten with any other member of Bonten, maybe even his own boss

🔪 But, you settled with him, the guy who had nearly overdosed from his drugs and alcohol multiple times

🔪 While pushing those hateful thoughts of himself to the back of his brain, Sanzu had gone through multiple attempts of rehabilitation, and after a few failures and your threat of leaving him, he began taking it seriously, he loves you and he needs you to be there

🔪 It took a while, but, once he made it to your first milestone of a year of sobriety, you gave him a reward, which led to something bigger than expected

🔪 You had gotten pregnant, leaving Sanzu is shock, and his brain nearly, nearly, slipped away to him grabbing a large bottle of whiskey and wine mixed with a large bag of his old drugs

🔪 In the midst of his panic-attack, it took Kakucho's words of affirmation with his boss' assurance of him getting a form of paternity leave to just calm him down

🔪 He takes excellent care of you during your pregnancy, and that carried onto him as a father, to a degree, that is

🔪 When you went into labor, he was panicking badly, he had nearly passed out when you began to scream in pain, and during this mass of chaos, the doctor had to usher Ran and Rindou to take him out of the room

🔪 Hearing your screams of agony stop made his heart sink, what happened? Were you okay? How was his baby? Oh God, what if he lost you and the baby?! How would he live with himself?!

" Mr. Haruchiyo, your wife and daughter are in perfect condition. Would you like to come and see them? " " Yes! I- I mean, yes, please. "

🔪 When he held your daughter for the first time, he swore on his life he would protect you guys from everything, including himself. And, that day, he swore to stay sober for good. No fuck ups this time, he couldn't, no, he wouldn't risk harming his child and his own wife

🔪 Ever since your daughter was born, the rest of Bonten began to hide their deals from your home more often, by orders of Mikey, since, he knew how a traumatizing childhood can affect someone

🔪 Sanzu loves to play with her, for example, at just a few months old until she was around maybe seven years old, he would pick her up and toss her in the air for him to catch

🔪 Unlike Mikey, Sanzu doesn't really fear anyone harming his child, if they were a boy that is, he has a full-fledged belief that boys are far more feared than women, so, whenever his daughter starts talking to a stranger, he glares from behind her to make sure that random guy didn't even attempt touching her

🔪 He definitely tries holding back his tears during her first day of school, or really during any massive part of her life, especially when she graduated and moved out, his baby was so old now... he's getting back pain!

" Dad... I'm just moving across the street in another apartment, don't worry! I'll come see you and Mom whenever I can! Please don't cry! " " I'm not crying about that! Your Mother swat a fly earlier, I feel bad for the fly! "

❤️‍🔥 This guy is the definition of husband and father material, that I cannot deny

❤️‍🔥 When you guys started dating, he always had the idea of your future, from marriage to having children, whenever he would come home from a fight all injured, he would ask you if this was what you really wanted

❤️‍🔥 Did you really want to be with him? For crying out loud, he could get possibly killed at any time! This especially set in when you guys lost Izana (I believe that still happens... correct me if I'm wrong!)

❤️‍🔥 It still shocks him to this day on the fact you married him, he worked for Bonten, a gang very well known for their heinous actions, all members, including Kakucho himself, have done horrible things, how could you look him in the eye, nonetheless propose having children?

❤️‍🔥 You really surprise him at every turn, don't you?

❤️‍🔥 He smiled and gave you the thumbs up. Thankfully, it didn't take very long for you to find out you were pregnant, and as your stomach grew, he read many books on parenthood, he couldn't risk his child having a childhood as rough as he did

❤️‍🔥 When you went into labor, he was scared out of his mind, all of a sudden the floor was wet and you were heaving over in pain, leaving him to carry you bridal-style as he ran to Bonten's doctor

" I think they're in labor, Doctor! " " Girls! Get her in the delivery room, stat! "

❤️‍🔥 Hearing you scream in pain made him flinch as Kokonoi and Takeomi tried keeping him from busting down the door to comfort you

❤️‍🔥 Once the doctor came outside of the room and asked for him to come inside, he burst past the man dressed in scrubs and hugged you as you laid on the bed with a blanket in your arms

❤️‍🔥 You hushed him and held up your baby girl's head, and when your husband laid eyes on his daughter, he began to tear up, he really started crying was when she gripped his finger with her tiny fist

❤️‍🔥 You guys really made this? How surprising is this, huh?

❤️‍🔥 As your son grew up, Kakucho adores messing with her hair, he always had his in a buzz-cut as he grew older, so, whenever she asked for him to braid her hair when she was small, he obliged and gave her such a cute hairstyle!

❤️‍🔥 Kakucho obligates his family in first place alongside his work, though, since he was one of the top four people in Bonten, he got quite busy, but, he always tries pushing it all away as best as he could

❤️‍🔥 Thankfully, Mikey was more lenient with that since he knew of Kakucho's family-oriented life

❤️‍🔥 He is definitely one of the best fathers in the Tokyo Revengers Universe, he wants his child to grow up in a world where they feel wanted, and that roots deep with his own childhood

❤️‍🔥 This guy is also very protective, he's lost so many people, his best friend, Izana, for example

❤️‍🔥 Anyone tries harming his daughter, there will be hell to pay.

💰 Kokonoi, much like Kakucho, is still surprised that you wanted to be with him, but, he's also surprised that he was still with you... he believed that after the loss of Akane that he would never love again

💰 Thankfully, when you came into his life during the earlier years of Bonten to help with some issues with relations between gangs, Kokonoi began to bond with you

💰 When he asked you to marry him after a few months of dating and a couple weeks of courting, he remembers exactly how you smiled when you confirmed you wanted the same as him

💰 Kokonoi has enough resources to care for his family, so, when you proposed having children, he wasn't very worried about expenses, this guy knows so many ways of making money that even the richest people in the world would be baffled

💰 He was very excited when you found out you were having a baby, nonetheless when it was found out to be twins

💰 During your early months of pregnancy, he would grab everything for female babies and male babies, since the gender was hard to tell until your fifth month

💰 This guy was on cloud nine when notified you were both genders

💰 Now he doesn't have to worry about Mikey being mad that he bought so much male and female items for these babies

💰 Anyways, when you eventually went into labor, Kokonoi was as calm as a butterfly on the outside, while on the inside he was like a swarm of angry geese, thoughts flying faster than the snitch in Harry Potter

💰 He stayed in the room with you, allowing you to squeeze his hand, despite the immense pain you were bringing to his hands, he probably was getting bruises from your hold

💰 When the sounds of your first baby's cries entered his ears, he swore he forgot all about the pain in his hands, but, when his daughter came out just a few minutes later, his heart swooned

💰 If you've seen Friends, you might be familiar when Frank Jr. ran out to the gang and was yelling about his first child's birth, oh yeah, he definitely does that

" Yes! We have the first one down! I cannot believe I have a son... oh God! I have a Hajime Jr.! " " Has your wife even agreed to that name, Kokonoi? " " Nope! "

💰 Kokonoi held his son, whom you had to turn down his ideas of naming him Hajime Jr., and you held your daughter, and you had to turn down him naming her Sanzu-ia, he loves pissing Sanzu off too much...

💰 As your babies grew up, Kokonoi spoiled them beyond belief, and you had to hold him back from doing something stupid, like buying a TV show because his little baby girl wanted to meet a character she loved

💰 While the two grew up, he, much like Sanzu, cries at mass events for them, but, unlike Sanzu, he doesn't try holding himself back from showing his emotions to his children, prompting their embarrassment and you laughing at their antics

" Dad... please stop crying, God you're so embarrassing me... " " I can't! My babies are growing up so fast! Can you believe that just eighteen years ago you're mother was pushing you out of her- " " DAD! "

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parad-ice-lostandfound · 6 months

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Prompt: The Prefect and their friends talk about the events of the Glorious Masquerade and come to some... rather belated conclusions.

Pairing: GN!Prefect/ Yuu/ MC with Deuce Spade, Epel Felmier and Sebek Zigvolt (Platonic)

Genre: Crack

TW: Slight spoilers for Book 5 of Glorious Masquerade.

AN: So... finally read the ending of Glorious Masquerade. I have very many feelings about Malleus and Rollo (obviously) but I also have many feelings about the Prefect's immunity to the firelotuses that everyone so conveniently forgot. In Idia's words, they're all a bunch of 'unga bunga, brute force' kinda people lmao-

This is also my first time writing for Sebek and Epel so I'm very nervous lol. If they seem out of character or something else seems weird, let me know!

"Man, I'm beat."

Deuce flopped onto your bed, sinking into the soft mattress with a sigh of relief. You smiled at him, running a comb through your hair to remove any tangles in it.

The two of you were already in pyjamas, tired from a night of dancing and socializing. You were waiting on a few more people though.

"Did you tell Epel and Sebek to meet us in my room?" You asked him as you ran your comb through your hair. The older students had to report the entirety of the previous night to Professor Trein, so you had decided that the first years could have their own tea-spilling session in your room. Grim, however, wanted to hear the heroic tales of the older students (and regale them with his own, no doubt) so he was with Professor Trein instead of being with you.

"I told Epel" his voice was muffled as he spoke, face smushed against the pillow. "He said they'd be here-"

Knock, knock. "Prefect? Are you in there?"

You walked over to the door, opening it to find Epel and Sebek, both in their pyjamas as well. Epel smiled at you, holding his hands behind his back, "I got Sebek like Deuce told me to."

"Human, what is the meaning of this?" Sebek huffed, too tired to yell his words like he usually did. He crossed his arms over his chest, narrowing his eyes at you. "As a retainer of Malleus-sama, I must get the required eight hours of sleep to continue to serve him diligently. How dare you keep me up after a night of saving the entirety of Twisted Wonderland from those abysmal flowers, and another night of merry-making?"

His words lacked their usual fire, so you just gave him a cheeky smile and pulled the two of them inside, closing the door behind them. "Come on, I just wanna talk to you guys. Besides, I have snacks."

Epel gave you a side-eye, trying to keep a cheeky smile from forming on his face. "Vil would be so mad."

"What Vil doesn't know won't hurt him~" you hummed, and Epel giggled. Sebek just sighed, taking his place on your bed after nudging Deuce a little.

"And then, when the flowers started climbing up his tail, he climbed onto Professor Trein's shoulder!"

"What?!" "Oh my-" "HOW ILL-MANNERED!"

You giggled at the reactions of your friends as you recounted Grim's actions. The four of you were sat on your bed. You were sitting with your back against the headboard, a pillow on your lap on which Deuce rested his head. With his feet planted on the bed and his knees in the air, his legs made a backrest for Epel who leaned against them, sitting with his legs criss-crossed. On your right side sat Sebek, with the snacks you four were sharing in the middle of the bed.

"I had half a mind to pull him off Professor Trein, but before that, the Bell of Solace rang," you hummed, messily braiding Deuce's hair as you spoke. "And then all the flowers wilted, and well, you know the rest."

"I still can't believe Grim tried to climb Professor Trein," Epel giggled as Sebek shook his head. Deuce sighed, looking up at you, "Well, I can't blame the little guy for being scared. Those flowers were no joke."

"Yeah, for you guys maybe. For me, they were just plain old flowers, if a little persistent and irritating," you shrugged.

"What?"

"Magicless human, remember?"

All three boys looked at you like you had grown three heads and burst into song and dance. You gave them a defensive glare, "What? I'm just saying, those things were perfectly harmless to me."

"....Yeah... Wait, does this mean we could have just sent you up to ring the bell?"

"Probably not...? I mean, Rollo was there on the top guarding the bell wasn't he? If he used magic against me, I'd be defenceless."

"Well, Rollo seemed a bit... partial towards you? You could've tricked him like you did with Azul-senpai that one time..." Deuce trailed off, and the four of you took in his words.

There was a moment of silence before-

"YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THERE WAS NO NEED TO PUT MALLEUS-SAMA IN DANGER?!"

#ice writes #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #x reader #gn!yuu #gn!reader #gn!prefect #twst #twst deuce #twst sebek #twst epel #deuce #epel #sebek #glorious masquerade #twst x reader #gn!mc

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the-s1lly-corner · 11 months

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How they react to you telling them you're pregnant

Obligatory reader is afab but like most of my posts they're gn/gendered pronouns aren't used

Slenderman;

Cue the confusion

Pregnant?

Surprised more than anything, he didnt think that he could get you pregnant considering you're both different species

And also he didnt think he was fertile; at least not in the normal sexual reproduction way

Kinda just

Accepts it

Now do I think he would be a good dad?

Maybe? He wouldn't be horrible or absent, but some human things are still foreign to him, including raising a child.. so hes probably going to need a decent amount of guidance

I feel like he'd also be a helicopter parent? He already watches you like a hawk, he'd probably start doing the same with his kid as they get older

"Hey (kid name) who's that tall white boy following you??" "Oh that's my dad"/j

Becomes more protective of you during the pregnancy and the weeks after

Takes it in stride tbh

Splendorman;

Pause

Before you start to worry he scoops you up

Also thought it wasnt possible, but is hyped when he finds out the news

He WILL pamper you... may also dip into overbearing territory, though

He just doesnt want you or the baby to get hurt

He says goodnight to the bump later on in the pregnancy tbh

Oh you know hes gonna be decorating their room and giving them loads of toys

Would be a good father but may dip into unhealthy habits

This dude struggles with toxic positivity imo, so that's definitely something that's gonna need to be addressed

Laughing Jack;

Okay obviously ALL of them are probably going to be sat down and told the news, but Jack is gonna need the most talking to given that he probably doesn't grasp the gravity of it

He KNOWS what pregnancy is, he KNOWS what a baby is; but he doesn't know the intricacies of pregnancy if that makes sense

Like he doesnt know about the soreness, or cravings, or how fragile those tiny human beings actually are. Dude already struggles with being gentle with adults

So it's going to require a long and in depth talk about everything that's going to happen if you guys decide to keep the kid

Reaction wise, he takes it seriously. Kind of uncanny compared to his usual silly demeanor

Again, due to him being a lil dumb hes almost under reacting

As a parent I think...

Okay he'd probably kinda suck

He would love the kid but he would be so so so irresponsible I'm so sorry

Gives the kid candy for meals (bro cant cook)

Get that man into some parenting classes PLEASE

Eyeless Jack;

Another "I'm surprised because I deadass thought I was infertile" one, given my whole lore/Hc for EJ

The most worried out of them all

"What if they're like me and are cursed? What if they hate me? What if they grow to hate me? What if-"

He baby proofs his cabin... before insisting that the baby stays at your place primarily (if you haven't moved in with him) because he's scared of his whole... eating people thing

Please give him loads and loads of reassurance, hes gonna need it

He'll work hard to be the best father he can be, though!

He takes the kid out for walks in the woods, teaches them different plants and bugs and tells them which are dangerous

"Oh I don't want to hold them, what if I hurt em?" *falls asleep while holding his baby after reading them a story*

Masky;

You gotta baby proof him and the house im sorry, hes feral

Another "you're gonna have to sit him down and lay down the rules" type deal

Hes already mellowed out around you but he needs to mellow out a touch more for an infant

Hard to gauge his reaction but he seems.... excited? Hard to tell when hes sitting still and wearing a mask

When the baby comes he, like slenderman, also watches them like a hawk

You will walk in on him sitting over their crib at 3am/hj

Surprisingly gentle when it comes to handling the kid, just casually walks around with them and shit

Great for looking after the kid during the night while you rest

Hoodie;

V similar to Masky but he's already naturally calm

Putting this here now before I forget but he would take his mask off to make faces at the baby to try to make them laugh

Mf doesn't take his mask off for you though ☝️🙄/hj

Surprisingly good at calming down screaming infants for some reason

Similar reaction as Masky; hard to read but way easy to guess its positive since he lightly boinks where his mouth would be under his mask to your cheek while papping your stomach

Hes a lil silly

But hes got the spirit

Good dad, me thinks

#creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta x you #slenderman x reader #splendorman x reader #laughing jack x reader #eyeless jack x reader #masky x reader #hoodie x reader

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thechekhov · 3 months

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Chekhov Reads Dungeon Meshi: CH46

D....dark Laios?

I mean, you DID consent!

The fact that ghosts can pass through walls and take other things with them... it kind of elicits another type of organism. Like, what can pass through cell walls? What other parts of the body can just yoink stuff from one place and bring it to another?

Congrats! It's all just been a dream!

I'm sorry what the SHIT?!?!?

Well, I-- .... yeah, I GUESS.

Though it looks more like one of those carousel horses.

I think this is probably still inside the dungeon. Very... DEEP. Inside the dungeon.

What? WHAT?! These things are like regular animals down here???

Oh, I--hm. I see.

Ordered by WHOMST?

Is this just an entire society of (humans??? ghosts?) that lives here in the dungeon deep? Is there still a king under the mountain? Are the rumors of the king dying not true at all?

........or are these people and descendants of adventurers who came in but were never able to leave? And the fact that Senshi points out that none of them are old.... are they ageing?

Laios, Senshi n--...... welp. There they go.

Bless this man and his absolutely non sexual obsession with monsters. But.

Izutsumi, who is a human-level intellect beastkin (though she's low on wisdom and patience....) is being very.... beast-ly and soft here. She's being magically compelled, presumably, to chill the fuck out.

Which means all these monsters are also under the same effect? Isn't that a little fucked up? They're basically under a permanent drugged effect.

Also. Hm. 'short lifespan' is....relative. Short lifespan compared to what? Immortality?

Orcs know this place exists....?

These people planting things for fun means they're absolutely trapped here like spirits.

Keeping up appearances for. Whom.

These poor people have no new incomers to talk to, huh.

Oh, I uh---- ................ hm. THat's not at all what I was imagining either.

Fashion is cyclical after all I guess....

Mmmmm. Mmmm-hmmmMMM.

WHEEEEZXE

Knowing I've finally hit these two absolutely iconic panels... amazing.

......I guess it can only do so much to make her docile...... she still doesn't like Laios.

Why does he look familiar...?

....so Derghal had a son. And a grandson. So then why is there a bid for the throne...?

Laios. Laios, is milking the minotaur the ONLY thing you did? Or was there more to it? Laios.

It's interesting. That bartender said he was 600 when he started his now-400 year old ale. So. That means they're 1000 years old.

That means that they're about as long lived as elves? Haven't gone mad yet. But that's still a long time.

That's kinda worse, yeah, but a loss of the self is a type of death, in a way...? So....

The most throwback of all time.

Actually, I feel like that's been there for a while, although it didn't always look EXACTLY like a lion's head. I feel like the little living armor he keeps in there made it that design? But how would it do that on purpose?

this is what it looked like some chapters back. Yeah, it's been sculpting into a lion's mane for a while now.... Ohohohoh playing the long game are we? 👀

Ah, it's not a wolf. How tragic for you, Laios. It'll never work out.

Also, damn, those wings sure be lookin like Falin's very non-dragon wings. What a wild coincidence. I'm sure that doesn't mean anything. :)

laughing hysterically. This poor guy can't get a break. He's been running from responsibility and inheritance for his entire life and it still catches up and trips him purposefully.

There is definitely a certain amount of tragedy there, yeah. These people aren't asking Laios for help because it's easier. They're legitimately stuck in a nightmare scenario. Unless you're someone who can get pleasure from other avenues, living all that time without the basic needs will drive a person mad. Elves live just as long, presumably, but they're still able to eat, I assume.

I'm honestly more surprised they're all as sane as they are.

.......King of Forgor.

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi liveblog #dungeon meshi quick reacts #chekhov reads dungeon meshi

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doodledrawsthings · 10 months

Note

Hey, I was looking through your stuff about Shadow of Shady Shore, and I really want to hear the lore behind it! Why is this random dad turning into a fluffy werewolf-adjacent monster? Who are the two women he hangs out with? Did he have a wife of some sort? You don't need to answer, but I am very curious.

The Random Dad's name is Luka (he/him). He's a divorced single father. His daughter's name is Harriet (she/they) but he calls her Bug. One day he kinda just. melted. for some reason. and turned into that big snake/slug/ferret/werewolf adjacent creature you see in some of my drawings. He can shapeshift and hold that shape for only a certain amount of time so he uses that to take on human form to do normal people things like try to hold down a job and take his kid to school. They move to a tiny kind-of-quiet-but-not-really town called Shady Shore. In Shady Shore, they meet some people like the person with the freckles who studies plants (Clover - she/her), and the tall guy with glasses (MJ-they/them), they're an artist and part-time waiter at a local diner. Clover also has a niece she takes care of named Bonnie (she/her). They all become become friends eventually, but I like drawing them post-becoming friends because i currently have no plans to do anything with this at the moment and just wanna draw em holding hands and doing chores. (burnout recovery reasons) Luka's arrival to the town causes a bit of a stir as some of the townies spot him in the woods in creature mode and now everyone's on the look out for the mysterious cryptid that has suddenly shown up in town, both locals and tourists, alike. He did have a wife at some point, but they aren't together anymore.

#the extra (not so) secret lore is that it used to be an au that got too far away from the source material #so now im reworking it into a fun little brain world for me to play with like Barbies #soss #shadow of shady shore #its kinda stardew inspired in a way #like slice-of-life-ish in a small town you have no choice but to befriend #but instead of an aspiring farmer looking to escape a corporate office environment #you're a minimum wage single father #who is also a werewolf. kind of.

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bogleech · 3 months

Note

What are your favourite dragon quest monsters across the entire series?

The first Dragon Quest Monsters game I've ever gotten to play wound up being the first one to leave out exactly the top three I looked forward to getting:

GIANTSLUG/MAULUSC: I'm pickier about slug and snail creatures than you maybe expect but I love the vapid drippy zombie face of the DQ slug. It perfectly captures the appeal of a slug as a monster, a mindless gooey thing that will just eat you without a care. And its classic color scheme is that of a Banana Slug!!

BELZEBUB: I am also picky about fly creatures; usually I want them to have the proboscis present in some way, and the correct number of wings (two). There's something I still love about the toothy mouth of Belzebub however, maybe the way it curls up between the eyes? It just does a good job capturing the feel of a fly's personality I guess.

DARKEYE/EYELASHER: eye creatures can also very easily feel a bit boring to me because I've just seen so, so many of them, but DQ's basic killer eyeball appeals to me a lot with its irregular fungus-like collection of tentacles. The little root branches on "top" are especially cool to me, and sometimes they're the bottom, because they represent where the eyeball attaches to either floors or ceilings! In a few games, they're even encountered as parasites inside bigger monsters!

I used to admire the guidebook to the first two DQ Monsters games as a kid but never had the games themselves, and never got around to any other DQ titles. I just spent my whole life waiting for just the right one where I'd finally get to assemble my three favorites, then finally this new one comes out and has to be the first time these three took a vacation :( But, Dark Prince was at least nice enough to include exactly my next three favorites in the franchise. I went over them already in my DQM Dark Prince post but some people will see this post first so I will have to reintroduce them:

DROHL: droopy flappy membranous mollusk guys, honestly horrible looking in a great way. In 3d games it turns out their helmetlike head spirals in the back like a snail shell! Apparently they're meant to be troll-like beings.

LUNATICK: just a blue fleshy sac thing with gooey antennae, a bunch of tentacles (most of them segmented like worms!) and a little eyeball, perfect, no criticisms, also reminds me of what Berserk considers an "Incubus:"

(Don't worry, Berserk Incubus aren't sex monsters but monsters that give you nightmares and feed on the fear)

TAILEATER/MAD MOLLUSK: I love how pathetic their front face looks, and the whole shape is so pleasantly reminiscent of an abyssal sea cucumber of some kind.

SKULLROO/GUAARDVARK: I didn't even realize this was one of my top favorites until getting it in Dark Prince. It's an unpleasant wrinkly fat aardvark kangaroo thing that just always carries a human skull around. Its profile says they collect them and the one they carry is their favorite! A lot of slightly lower favorites were also left out however, none of these are in Dark Prince but are very high up there to me:

PYURO: what is this thing? I don't know! Different games have categorized it as an insect or a plant. It's a furball with five eyes encircling a butterfly proboscis, two little legs and a big huge ring of flower petals behind it. Very xenobiology.

TONGUELLA: it's kinda like a dumpy, hairless sloth with an aardvark tail with a mushed-in dog face and a giant gross tongue. I guess I just like foul moist beasts. I wish this was a real mammal we had in the world, I bet it'd smell terrible. Feels like a perfect counterpart to Guaardvark.

SLURPERON: it's one tiny pitcher plant with a giant tongue and then it has cool reptilian eyes at the bottom end. So simple and so rad! A fun way to stylize a pitcher plant monster without ripping off Victreebel.

SICKLER: is a little tiny mantis in a robe, like the Tonberry from Final Fantasy but a mantis

RAGIN' CONTAGION: a newer one, a gooey vaporous cyclops ghost that represents disease. In its first appearance as a boss in the series the English localizers decided it should talk like Yosemite Sam. Sure why not!

So I like the new game and it gave me some new favorites like Skellyfish and new appreciation for some others, but oddly it only has my very middle all-time faves

#dragon quest

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teecupangel · 3 months

Note

Ok so I have had an idea. This is a bit of reference to the ratatouille au continuation of Desmond being able to hear us in the animus servers. So picture this, after a while of us talking to Desmond checking up on him and the others. Someone the group chat somehow makes a mod that gives the players (us) avatars to pilot in the servers for a short amount of time, but instead of the bodies being human they're just random animals from mise to crows to hawks and eagles. So here kinda how I think this would go. So all the ancestors are asleep or resting in the servers, meanwhile the person who made the mod adds it into the server and there's a bit of commotion as the person tells everyone else, and so the players get to work making the avatars. Then morning comes around, Desmond and the others wake up and see this excessive about of rodents just gathered around everyone. After a moment of panic and shock for our dear assassins and templars they come to find out that now the voices "inside" Desmond's head are now here ready to try And cause some havack.

Oh don't forget to drink water and eat something l. I hope you have a great day/night

Thank you, nonny! I hope you're having a great day/night too! (And yeah, I'll be eating my dinner after this hahahaha) The Ratatouille AU where the ancestors can hear Desmond while ‘playing’, its more unhinged cousin, the Ratatouille AU where Desmond can hear us and the outside POV of Al Mualim thinking the Apple broke Altaïr and the sidestory of Altaïr accidentally connecting with Ezio while looking for Desmond

Here’s the horror-esque version of this AU for this interested in that kind of setup.

Alright, confession time. When I was writing for the voices, my brain immediately to the ‘chat windows’ that popped up in Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint and in The Perks Of Being An S Class Heroine.

Then I thought, you know what would be funny? If it was like an actual chatbox with our preferred avatar kinda like this:

To make this stranger, all the avatar are like stock photos of animals and plants. This way, when their avatar finally comes to form, Desmond will be surrounded by various animals.

What happens to the ones who chose plant avatars?

My initial idea was that they would be floating plants like a leaf or a flower just floating in the air.

But then I realized…

We’re crazy enough to band together and create a ‘strange’ unique flower crown to put on Desmond’s head.

The ones that transformed into animals would go “That’s not fair! Why do you guys get to be that close to Desmond?!”

“Plant ftw, bitches!!!” A dandelion of all things would shout out, accidentally blowing itself up and floating away from Desmond, “Fuck!”

A second passed and the dandelion glitches out of existence.

Only to glitch back into the (technically floating) flower crown on Desmond’s head.

“Hey, guys, did you know it cost 1000 Helix to respawn? Fucking Ubi████.”

For those who don’t care about Ubisoft’s monetization scams (as you should), 1000 Helix is more or less $10 and they don’t sell 1000 Helix, they sell the small pack for $9.99 and it gives 1050 Helix. For reference, AC Valhalla’s complete sets (full armor + 2 weapons + mount and raven skin) usually cost around 1500 Helix.

So yeah… even though the ‘players’ have spawned in Desmond’s world, they are still haunted by monetization. (This does mean Desmond has gotten himself an immortal army of plants and animals)

#ratatouille au #assassin's creed #desmond miles #teecup writes/has a plot #fic idea: assassin's creed #ask and answer

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eggsaladsandwhic · 1 year

Text

Vash Headcannons (SFW and NSFW)

Follow my previous posts about the Poly Knives x OC x Vash CollegeAU fic I'm doing so here's some ideas I gotta dump.

SFW/General

Ecology Major vibes, is also getting an Ethics minor

Hates chemistry with a burning passion

Makes a lot of friends, but only hangs out with a few so he doesn't overwhelm himself

Nurodivergent Vash!

(He/They)! Or (They/them) either works

Doing a stem degree while having ADHD and anxiety sucks so much but Vash thrives in it somehow

College has really been flaring up his plant traits lately, has to call Rem or talk to Nai on the weekly for help (Though Nai just keeps telling him to stop repressing it)

Has to wear long sleeves or hoodie a lot to cover up the feathering leaves that pop out.

Vash doesn't realize it but it's anxiety that's causing it, but Nai started lending him some compression shirts and so it's gotten better

BUFF DADBOD VASH (this idea possess me)

He's gotten better with dealing with stress and no longer resorts to starving himself

GOES TO THERAPY(one of these twins gotta do it)

Between Nai's cooking, drinking on the weekends, and the amount of donuts this dude can eat he's living his best life

Works out when he gets the time and bowls competitively

Wants a significant other (Mates for life) but it's so hard, especially when starts thinking about the fact he's not human

Has a fear of having someone he really loves and then them finding out he's a plant and reacting negatively. Vash thinks Nai and him would likely have to move back to the facility with Rem. He doesn't want to uproot the lifestyle him and his brother have

Gets a little depressed about it, but is really good with having a support group on standby

Gets hit on at bars a lot but it always flys over his head or they're too pushy about it.

Wolfwood sets him up with dates once in a blue moon but it goes horrible or the girls just don't like him for more than his looks

Physical touch is this man's love language and he just wants someone he can lean on

Add someone who likes doing domestic activities?? Y'all are going to the courthouse next week

Wants to just curl up next to someone even platonically at this point

Has an agreement with Nai sometimes that they sleep in the same bed like when they were kids (Nai always grumbles about it but sleeps better that night anyway)

Nsfw Below 👇

OH SHIT OH FUCK

(NSFW)

So I did some research today and did y'all know that wild purple geraniums have a tendency to be Hermaphrodites

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

Vash is a dual package (living the dream ong)

Plantussy and Plantdick combo meal

So I imagine that his dick would sit above his vulva and vagina? Testes would likely be internal (genuinely trying to form an anatomy basis I'm actually looking at a diagram rn)

As for his female organs I'd say he consented to a hysterectomy because it was causing growth issues (post op sucked but he figured it out)

Took testosterone for awhile until everything was functional

Became a lot more sexually comfortable with himself after this

6.5in prehensile tentacle dick, bumpy rounded ridges on the sides and little more on the girthy end

Has more of those downy soft petals that unfold during sex, and dick likely has a sheath because it's more fleshy (kinda like the inside of your mouth)

Hyperspremia and leaves a mess everytime he jerks off, squirts a lot too (probably got a dedicated bath towel at this point)

He has fucked himself with his own dick and usually prefers to

Owns quite a few sex toys and likes to experiment around a little bit

Goes from a Fleshlight, a regular dildo, has a couple fantasy ones, and anal and prostate toys

High sex drive, but can cum pretty quick (short recovery period, usually goes 3 rounds but can do more)

Rut is 10x worse too you'd be lucky to make it to the fridge

Makes sperm plugs during rut

SWITCH VASH(still a virgin though)

Desperate sex kinda guy, gets pussy drunk or cock dumb so easily, folds like a chair no matter what

Make him unfurl his wings out it means he trusts you so much

Please go down on him and absolutely devour him

Very sweet though and would definitely check in a lot (check in with him too it makes him feel fuzzy)

Has a sex awareness to not hurting you accidentally, during rut he's very nervous about it

Aftercare King (loves to shower or take a bath after)

More of a hickey giver than a biter

Usual kinks: Breeding, Pegging, Overstimulation, Cum play, cockwarming, Oral, Praise, Hair-pulling

Unusual: Blindfolding, Shibari(both ways around), Begging, wants to be degraded a little bit

Jesus my brain went wild there, I was doing research for some of this shit. Was supposed to be doing Geochemistry homework but this happened ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯. Anyways gn y'all I got a 9am.

#trigun stampede #trigun smut #vash the stampede #vash x reader #vash headcanons #millions knives #vash smut #vash x you #vash is babygirl #trigun au #trigun vash

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cuprohastes · 1 year

Text

The Lab Rats

Dave the Human and Dave The Human were checking on the moss substrates - Spot checking for anything that might have snuck in, or any environmental issues that could be detected by checking the moss's bio-accumulation.

Garfield "Garf" Bloom, a 7ft tall, kinda reptilian biped rolled in, in her normal-for-the-species gait, hauled out Un-Named Male, her little guy, out of her pouch and dropped him from a moderate height onto the moss bank.

"Hey Garf." said the Dave that was a female Tsin for biological reasons and a male human for Payroll reasons.

"Yo, you two." said the Dave who was Human, plausibly male but had spent a week as a Female Atrix, as part of a plot to annoy the government.

Un-Named Male flashed a howdy with his display patch and wiggled into the patch of purple moss happily, which is a small Atrix's natural habitat.

"So I heard that the Human science labs still use rats." Garf said. "Do you... not use bio-chips or clone cells?"

Dave with scales scratched her chin. "Dave, you want to take this one?"

Other Dave wiggled a probe into a particularly scruffy clump of moss and nodded. "Indeed I do!" he said.

"You see, rats are very social, and have a short generation span. Back before we could load up cells onto a chip for testing we needed them for... well testing."

"Yesh! Pretty much everyone did that at some point in history." added Dave The Human, Running a spectrograph on a sample to check the light absorption was within the expected range.

Un-Named Male jsut lurked in the soft, moist moss and let the high UV lighting play on his back, which added nothing to the conversation, but he did look very comfortable.

"Right. So when it stopped being necessary for uh, biological testing, rats were often used for behavioural testing. Non-human cognition, social studies, that sort of thing."

"OK..." said Garf, quietly wiggling her fingers into the moss and making a kneading motion, a common and casual motion that would break up the substrate and allow aeration. It was soothing - Even a big Atrix like Garf remembered the comfort of hiding in a moss patch.

The Atrix parts of The Station were basically covered in various species of Moss - Their solution to air quality and comfort, and it'd taken the humans about nine seconds to point at a wall mat of deliciously verdant and fuzzy plant life and go 'Want!'.

Indeed, the introduction of non-native species for one's living quarters was just one of the benefits of the Human-Atrix alliance.

The Tsin, who developed scales to keep their water on the inside had not really taken to it so much, but if you want some fungus to add a little pizazz, they're the go-to.

"Anyway, eventually it sort of got to be a hobby thing. People like rats. They make great pets, they quite like us, and they're very non-judgemental. So someone did this study and found that labs that had a colony of two or more rats had better results... The scientists could go over and fuss with the little fuzzballs and de-stress, and it turns out if you sit down and explain your experiments to a rat, you often figure out what is causing you problems."

"Seriously?" asked Dave The Human.

"Seconded." said Garf.

"Wait, aren't they vermin?"

"Oh totally." said Dave, "Well some are. Same species. But... it turns out if you give them the opportunity they're little fuzzy buddies, so we brought them with us."

"And they're used by human scientists... to figure things out indirectly?"

"For real. Sometimes they get cited in papers as authors," said Dave happily. "I used to keep a couple when I was a Little Guy"

Note: Little Guy in this case is an Atrix phrase. The Atrix pretty much only have one gender which is size. It actually doesn't distinguish male or female. That's a human thing. Even the Tsin have four biological sexes. Un-Named Male is only nominally male because he's small. He is an adult of the species. One day he's going to put on some body mass and develop bipedal locomotion and eventually be a large Atrix, and get his own Little Guy, and be referred to as female.

"That's why they're called Lab Rats - They're essential to Human Science."

Garf pondered this, leaning to run her cheek along a mossy wall. "We just talk to our little guys." she noted casually and a patch of moss said "Grak" in confirmation.

The Tsin in the room made a face. "Dang, yo. I think we're missing out!"

"Hmm," said the more human of the Daves. "I smell an Interspecies Xenthropology collab..."

And that, dearly beloved, is how the Tsin got their Rats.

#rats #station stories #dave the human #atrix #tsin #humans being weird little guys #humans are weird #haso #humans are space orcs

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bonefall · 5 months

Note

Never done an ask before, so this is interesting. Anyways, I decided to try my hand at translating some of my OCs into Clanmew! Forewarning, I was doing this while playing COD with my siblings, and had some trouble with translating!

FlintShadow - Swarfyfwasha; I couldn't find flint, so I went with this.

BadgerHeart - Pihabababun: I also couldn't find badger, so I don't know if I'm just bad at using google sheets, or... But I think this name is fun to pronounce even though he's evil. Really funny.

BristleStrike - Bachkubo: I almost went with Marrl for his prefix instead, but I didn't want it to be so negative.

ChestnutScar - Konchyach: I just couldn't find most of the prefixes, though that could've just been my inexperience. I also kinda like how this one's pronounced, too.

FoxFang - Aowaoki: I find this one is pretty cute sounding.

OakThistle - Byochkegkep: He's got a mouthful of a name! Really like it, though. I went pretty generic with the Thistle part, since I didn't know the connotations or much about the specific plants and didn't have time between COD matches to do so. Sorry.

BuzzardStrike - Yassgakubo: this guy is BristleStrike's, ChestnutScar's and OakThistle's father. Not very nice, either.

StarlingFrost - Kaawiachiki: This is the main girl, younger half-sister to FlintShadow and BadgerHeart. She's also lesbian, so that's great. Actually, LeopardStep is her mate.

LeopardStep - Saorpappap: I figure there's a better word for 'Step', but it's late where I'm from and I have school tomorrow. It's also really cute, but it doesn't really fit her personality. She's more out-spoken and brazen and things like that.

Yeah, so... These certainly are not the best, but I think they're good for my first shot at this. It was actually pretty fun! Of course, if you have better ideas for the translation, I wouldn't mind some constructive criticism!

I love your BB AU, btw! And it has inspired me to work on my own OC clans! Sorry for how long this is!

You did excellently! These names are great!

Here's a scattershot of some fresh words for you;

Chestnut (Aesculus hippocastanum) = Koneq Note that in Clanmew, a name for a plant refers to the ENTIRE organism, so this word refers to a horse chestnut tree. This is actually because Clan cats are obligate carnivores, they mostly think of trees and plants in terms of how they affect HUNTING, not the edible things they produce. They also wouldn't distinguish between the Horse Chestnut and the Sweet Chestnut. This is because prey will eat the nuts equally, but sweet chestnuts can finicky. They don't grow well in the wild. Even if the Clan cats had access to a couple of sweet chestnuts, they would just assume it's a chestnut with differently-shaped leaves and never find out that their nuts are edible, because horse chestnuts are HIGHLY poisonous to cats. They would not risk trying to eat a sweet chestnut, assuming that it's the same type of toxic rock as a horse chestnut.

Conker = Okikwo Comes from Spike + Ball. One of the very few fruits that has a unique name unrelated to its "plant" in Clanmew! Conkers are the green, spiky "nut" (nekboq) containing poisonous "acorns" (kong) that come from chestnut trees. They are often wrapped in leather and used as balls, though some games just play with an unwrapped conker (ow).

Flint = Boshur Etymology unclear; Possibly Stone + Holy + Pale. Found exclusively at the Mothermouth, which is an abandoned quartz mine. Because there is no other good source of flint at Sanctuary Lake, the pieces that were brought with the Clans fleeing the destruction of the White Hart have become precious heirlooms. Flint is the most reliable way of making fire. Clan cats believe that it is a gift from StarClan, and reacts when struck against the "evil" fake-flint that Humans try to clad their monsters and fences in (metal).

Stance, gait, "way of walking," most common form of the "step" suffix = Yam Most of the time, if a specific verb for a type of walking isn't used, -step is "yam." When used with a prefix, it implies that they MOVE like the thing they are named after. It means a bit more than just a single physical step, or a particular movement, it's the WAY it moves around.

Pawprint, animal track = Pabyam Self-explanatory. The impression of an animal's foot on the ground.

And, lastly, badger is mair. I realized that we just didn't have a word for it a while ago, and I was also taken aback by that. It's surprising we went this long without it, lmao.

#clanmew #oc submission

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tragedytells-tales · 5 months

Text

Obey Me Incorrect quotes

Notes - quotes from poker nights + Sam and max, Feat. Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor + the rare Luke, Solomon, Simeon, and Barbatos appearance

Summary - A bunch of stupid incorrect quotes and sometimes they're out of character on purpose!

Warnings - Slight game spoilers, Chaotic and traumatized MC, Forth wall breaking

Tw - Gambling, Strong language, Guns, Violence ( nongraphic )

MC: Well of course you won with THOSE cards! Even Luci could'a won with those cards, and all he can do is talk about alcohol and how much of a poor single widowed mother he is!

Lucifer: Where in the three realms did you lot hide my demoneus now?

MC: shut the FUCK UP LUCI‼️ and people say I'M annoying??

( Telltales games : poker nights )

MC: Hey asmo, what do you think I should do?

Asmodeus: Tell her how you really feel before she runs off with Blaine!

MC: About the hand, chucklehead.

Asmodeus: Oh. Check.

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Demon student: I gotta ask, what's it like living on a different plain of existence?

MC: It's great! As long as you ignore the constant firefights, random explosions, human eating plants, the fact that everyone I know and love has killed me, attempted to kill me, assisted in almost getting me killed, worsened my trust issues, or that every demon could try to eat my soul at any time- The devildom really is a home away from home!

Everyone (aside from Solomon, Simeon, and Luke): *whistles*

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: This decks gone colder than my ex. Zombie not demon, they were actually kinda hot!

MC: Sometimes I regret being brought down here. this isn't one of em though, tell me more!

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC, talking about Michael: I've only become aware of your existence for 1 minute and I already unapologetically hate you AND everything that you stand for!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Hey! how much property damage do you think I can get away with in the span of, let's sayy, 2 minutes?

Belphegor: considering your last record, I'd say the entirety of RAD plus half of the forest.

Lucifer: yOU WHAT??

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC, watching the brothers fight: I believe I need to get in touch with my anger, Satan.

Satan: I can help with that!

( Sam & Max S1 E15 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: I believe our persuasive charm could have him seeing things our way!

MC: Or not seeing anything at all.

( Sam & Max S1 E15 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: And what in the 7 rings happened here?

Barbatos: I'll tell you what just happened here, they just drove a man insane.

Mammon and Asmo: all in a days work!

( Sam and Max S1 E15 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Solomon: STOP THEIVES!

MC: Y'know that never works, right?

Solomon: Oh, I know. But it's such a wonderful prelude to the impending mayhem!

( Sam and Max S1 E16 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo, squeezing MC: I will pet you, and love you, and subjugate you to my every will!

( Sam and Max S1 E16 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: I think that poor human has been forever scared, Barbatos.

Barbatos: Then our work here is done, my liege.

( Sam and Max S1 E16 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Beelzebub: Not to be skeptical or anything, but what makes this little human a potential weapon of doom?

MC: :]

( Sam and Max S1 E17 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Oh I think I understand, you want me to feel like any other person with freakishly destructive powers! You guys are so sweet!

( Sam and Max S1 E17 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Well this is an unlikely turn of events.

Mammon: Foiled by some oversized rubber baby buggy bumper. ( He's talking about Belphie. )

( Sam and Max S1 E18 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Belphegor: Hey MC, what am I?

MC: Dumb question, you're a doof.

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo, playing UNO: Is that a good idea? Cause honestly, I don't really know what I'm doing!

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Solomon: I want one, but it's not for me. It's for my friend, Luke!

Luke: Don't go dragging me into your slighty malevolent and silly schemes, Solomon.

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Simeon: 25th anniversary huh?

Beel: yup.

Simeon: But didn't you guys get together in the same year as the exchange program?

Beel: yes, I guess so.

Simeon: then that was 26 years ago?

MC *from afar*: MATH NEEEEEEEEEERD!!

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: I think this has taught us all a very important lesson. But I'll be damned if I can figure out what.

Luke: I'm unsure how much more damned you can get and I'm afraid to find out.

( Telltales games : poker nights )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Asmodeus: Move freely he says. In these heels?!

( Sam and Max S1 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Satan: So that's why I always feel an overbearing presence just out of my field of vision, watching and judging my every move! *stares at the forth wall*

In-game MC, at his side: That's me dude.

( Sam and Max save the world )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Demon student, looking at Luke: How far would you go if I punt you?

MC: HOW DARE YOU EVEN SUGGEST SUCH A THING. He's my lil angel.

( Sam and Max devils playhouse )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Simeon: Do you two know what happened?

Luke: I can't lie to Simeon!

MC: I can, kid! No, no we do not.

( Sam and Max the devils playhouse )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: MC, where do you put all your school supplies?

MC: In my backpack of course!

Lucifer: But you're a sheep. Where do you put your backpack?

MC: Now that is none of your damn business, Luci.

( Sam and Max the devils playhouse )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: Magnatism? Don't tell me you're one of those kooks!

Satan: You don't believe in Magnatism?

Mammon: It's an interesting theory, but I'm not convinced.

Satan: This is almost as bad as Beel believing curry is a concept.

( Sam & Max beyond space and time )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: What in Diavolos name is going on in here?!

MC: My tomfoolery is none of your concern.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: MC, I believe I have developed feelings for you over the time we've known eachother.

MC: Huh, feelings of anger?? You wanna fight?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: MC, I didn't study for this test?! What do I write?!

MC: That's our marriage certificate, Mammon.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Belphi, wake up!

Belphegor: Huhh, what is it MC?

MC: You fucked up big time.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: I'm going to commit mass arson, and no one can stop me!

Lucifer: Why.

MC: ...Good question. Chaos.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: A blackout in a room full of violent creatures? Ah, don't be such a fussypants!

Mammon: A FUSSYPANTS??

( Sam & Max S1 E12 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Beelzebub: I'm Beel! And this is my huggable family!

Everyone in the room: Please don't hug us.

( Sam and Max this time it's virtual! )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Asmodeus: and here's the house of lamination! A colorful and full of life home that came to be under mysterious circumstances!

MC: By "colorful" He means decaying, filled with demonic forces, and smells like certain damnation with a hint of mildew. And by "mysterious" he means a psychologically scarring murder house turned horror movie that was dragged down here by Lucifer himself.

( Sam and Max this time it's virtual! )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Belphegor: I thought we needed one of those mermaid candies to breath down here.

MC: It's fiction, jarhead. We have ridiculous lung capacity.

( Sam & Max s1 E2 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

*During the angels event*

MC: Kindness? Charity? Understanding!? When will this hellish nightmare end?!

( Sam and Max )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Beelzebub: You aren't scared of me?

MC: Me? Scared of you? Why should I be, you're a big blubber of man.

( Life of Melody )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: You're looking hale and hearty today Lucifer!

Lucifer: I had five years worth of coffee in five minutes Diavolo.

( Sam and Max hit the road )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: MC, you have as much of a say in this as anyone else does.

MC: You mean like how I had a say in my technical kidnapping and all of my many near death experiences?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC, walks into the room with a gigantic lint roller covered in dog fur: So I lint rolled the puppy.

Mammon: Okay.

* five minutes later *

Mammon: Wait MC did what?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Belphegor: This is your first and final warning! Pull over or die!

( Sam and Max save the world )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC, looks at the dislike portion of the student ID: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Simeon: Can I drive?

MC: Jumping vehicular homicide, no!

( Sam & Max save the world )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: What do you have?

Solomon: A microwave!

MC: Somehow that's worse than you having a knife.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Satan: They say an idle mind is the devils playhouse

MC: How curiously insulting.

( Sam & Max the devils playhouse )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Satan: Are you sensing my desire to turn you into a QUIET LIL HANDBAG.

Luke: Satan.

Satan: Sorry.

( Sam and Max S1 E10 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Daivolo: Hey MC, can I-

MC: No.

(Sam and Max save the world )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Question, when was panda express constructed?

Beelzebub: Uhhhh 1776??

MC: Ah yes, during the American revolution!

( sunny side skies )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: What're ya gonna do? Gimme the silent treatment?

MC: .....

Mammon: Nooo, stop, pleeeease!!!

MC: Never underestimate the power of passive aggression, mams.

( Sam & Max beyond space and time )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Belphegor: By the name of the moon I will kick thy ass!

( colors of my canvas )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: MC, can I ask why you're parkouring over furniture and nearly breaking every vase in sight?

MC: Lilith keeps trying to touch me with her icy hands!

Lilith: they're not that cold MC! I promise!

MC: YOU'RE DEAD! THEY'RE FREEZING.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: Where is your "can-do" attitude?

MC: She left, long ago!

( heartstopper show s1 e1 )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Luke *with the most serious face he can muster*: MC, I don't want to be friends anymore!

MC: Yeah, okay, that's cool lil buddy-

Luke: MC? MC are you crying?

MC: No, no, it's okay, this is fine-

Luke: MC, you're sobbing.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: Cerberus is ment to discouraged you from coming into the unground tomb.

MC, currently cuddling with a sleeping cerberus and peting his heads: And?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: It's so sad frisk died of ligma

Belphegor: who's frisk?

MC: ligma balls

Belphegor: AHHH-

( Saying alot of things as Kris )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Are there British people here in the devildom?

Diavolo: What?

Soloman: Of course not MC, British people aren't real.

Diavolo: What???

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lilith: why are you the size of a shrimp?

Belphegor: Why are you nonexistent in a physical form?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: If I gave Diavolo a lemon, he would disintegrate and I would become the ruler of the devildom, and that's the way the world turns.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Satan: -to make them think they've come here willing and have them be more submissive."

Solomon: *cough*andbreedable*cough*

Mammon: MC, you've been drugged- Solomon????????

Lucifer: I can't have a moment of peace.

( The Day Out by @/beels-burger-babe )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: It's just sitting there, menacingly...

MC: It's literally just eating grass.

Diavolo: It's looking at me with cold, dead, eyes...

MC: It is entirely focused on the grass.

Diavolo: It's unnatural.... how can something be so, complacent?! So, unbothered?? So... So uncaring about what may happen should it let it's guard down for even a second?!

MC: That's because not everything runs on caffeine, procrastination, and daddy issues, Diavolo.

Diavolo: It's scary! 🥺

MC: It's a Capybara.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Plural for platypus, go.

Platipy- Mammon , Daivolo , Luke , Beelzebub

Platypuses- Satan , Lucifer , Barbatos

*windows shut down* - Levi , Simeon

Platypuss(e)s - Asmo , Belphi , Solomon

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: You good?

MC: No.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Player: AYO!

MC: huh?!

Player * dragging MC *: let's go bud, we're off to therapy!

MC: WAIT-

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Asmo: Asdsgvdfdzkga!!@^$$"'

MC: ....Pardon?

Asmo: You don't know keysmash?

MC: This is an audible conversation.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Luke: Please let this be a normal day...

MC: With these several idiots? No way!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Hold on- how was I able to hear him from my room, which is by the kitchen down the hall from the stairs, from the attic?

Beelzebub: Big attic.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

* C R A S H *

Teen!MC: are you okay dude?

Teen!Demon: yeah I'm fine *scurrys away*

Beelzebub: they were flirting with you btw.

Teen!MC: what?

Beelzebub: Yeah, they were showing off their magic for a few minutes now. Kinda a shame you only noticed when they crashed.

Teen!MC: Damn, that's rough.

MC: All dirt is grime but not all grime is dirt.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Mammon: Huh?

MC: All poultry is meat but not all meat is poultry.

Beelzebub: Correct.

MC: All math is calculated but not everything that is calculated is math.

Satan: Alright now you're just going off the rails.

MC: All pails are buckets but not all buckets are pale.

Asmo: MC, dear, I think you're sleep deprived.

MC: You can read all books but not all books have been read.

Lucifer: context, Also it is 2 am. Why are you up?

MC: Osmosis is always diffusion. But diffusion is not always Osmosis.

Belphegor: Very true.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

* Loud explosion *

Mammon * from across the castle *: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT MC??

MC: that, was the sound- * peeks into the kitchen * OF THE KITCHEN BEING BURNED DOWN?!?!

Solomon: * cackling *

(Helluva boss )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Luke: I am not a child and I don't need to be treated like one!

MC: You're literally 10. I don't know who traumatized you or how but it is fine to be a 10 year old with 10 year old feelings.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: All is forgiven-

Someone far away: BABY, C'MON GET DRESSED, YOU'RE MY DATE TO THE PEP RALLY TONIGHT!!

Solomon: Oh no.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Teen!MC: Fuck it, let's go to hell!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: They be like "I'm good and fine!" Sir, you are mentally ill and have suppressed half of your lifetime, nothing about you is "fine".

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC & Barbatos: YOU SPIN ME RIGHT ROUND BABY, RIGHT ROUND, LIKE A RECORD BABY, RIGHT ROUND ROUND ROUND

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: Have you no free will friend?!

Asmodeus: Excuse you, I'll have you know I did that morally injust thing on purpose.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Diavolo: I have a task for you-

MC: No.

Diavolo: wait what?

MC: No.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: * crying over Liliths body, reeling from war, daddy issues sky high, extraordinarily traumatized *

Diavolo: I can fix him!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Luke: Ah, shit.

Simeon: Sir?

* later *

Simeon: Goddammit.

Michael: Excuse me?

* even later *

Michael: Son of a bitch.

MC: I didn't even say anything.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC: So if I take off the ring I could potentially collapse all the realms, ending the worlds as we know it?

Solomon: yes.

MC: So the ring is the only thing stopping me being consumed by own magic and essentially killing me?

Solomon: yes.

MC: And the ring should be kept on at all times?

Solomon: Not really, but yes.

MC: You mean... the ring that's laying on the floor right next you?

Solomon: Pardon?

- - - - - - - - - - - -

MC after getting 6 hours of sleep over the span of three days because Belphegor doesn't stop whining: Can the DEMONIC BEINGS that go THUMP in the ATTIC, SHUT UP?!

Belphie: *stomping his feet* IF I HAVE TO SUFFER SO DO YOU

MC: WELL I DIDN'T LOCK YOU IN THERE, NOW DID MR ELDER BROTHER ISSUES?!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Lucifer: You're an irritable sheep today, aren't you?

MC: Yeah, well, why don't try sitting in this smelly booth while I beat the hell outta helpless fish?

( Sam and Max hit the road )

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Asmodeus: He hasn't stopped balling, or spewing, or having violent fits of rage since we brought him home! I wonder what's vexing him so...

Bb Satan: * Screaming bloody murder *

( Sam and Max S1 E10 )

AN - I needed a break from writing a long chapter and refound this. I don't know what it is either.

#obey me shall we date #obey me incorrect quotes #obey me crack

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man-moth-hook-hand · 11 months

Text

Horsemen of the Apocolypse

My headcannons of what the boys would be as the Four Horsemen of the apocopyse! I havn't seen this idea yet and I thought it would be pretty neat.

Masterlist

Paul - Death

I feel like he fits because he likes to kill, but he isn't as sadistic as the other boys

More silly and has more leeway of how his victims die

He treats hunting as a pass time, or a simple hobby

He knows that his victims will die, but he's not very worried about his victims getting away

Death isn't just dying, it's mourning, loosing, feeling intense emotions, and sometimes it causes the living to kill themselves

Those are what he call "Day's Off" since there's no day off for Death

If they were a good or innocent person, he'll appear as a comforting figure while taking their soul

If they were, say, a murder, he would kill them like how they killed their victims (He only does this on days he has more time, Death's a Busy guy, ya know?)

He knows at the end of the day, he'll get them, they'll die, and the cycle will begin again.

Over, and over, and over, and over, for all of his eternity

Living is worse in his opinion

He has a garden of souls where everybody he takes goes

If they were good, they go to their respective afterlife (It's a whole thing, he doesn't like to get into it, too much paperwork)

If not, either their equivalent of Hell, or if they believed in nothing, they serve him

They get him all kinds of things, like his book of names, the quill in ink blood, and sometimes has them work underneath the other boys

He's got too many to know what to do with, it's like his version of sims

Marko - Famine

Marko's more sadistic, he likes to watch his victims suffer

Faminem in his mind, is about causing individual suffer, not mass scale like war or death

It's tailored to each victim, earing its own challenge in a way

Marko like the challenge of finding way to starve them, not just of food, but attention, love, money, anything he can

He especially likes starving people of their looks, he thinks that people put too much into them instead of other things, like love or something else humans should enjoy.

He does this through making food rot, causing food posining

Perhaps a batch of cosmetics had an expired ingredient in it and cause a total recall since it was giving people severe allergic reactions

Or perhaps somebody relies on the attention of others, and he's caused their friends to become busy for some odd reason or another

His kiss is deadly

Since most times people get sick from touching their lips or eyes, he'll visit them when they're sleeping so as not to disturb them

Then he'll breath into the mouth of whatever disease he wants to infect them with

If it's an infection from a wound, he'll casually spit in it when possible, other than that he'll drag his infected fingernail in the shape of an "X"

War - Dwayne

There's more planning when it comes to war, Dwayne is meticulous and thoughtful

He plants the seed in people’s heads, usually through anger

Dwayne like psychologically torturing his victims

He put the thought that a another man was sleeping with a man's wife, causing a fight between the two

He pits parents and children against each other too

A mother hates her son as he acts exactly like his deadbeat father

He fuels countries feuding over pointless debts and social policies

His workspace is kinda set up like map of the world where he can zoom in on areas and specific people

He often partners with David and Marko to cause more destruction in peoples life

Marko enjoys the personal torment, and David loves the added control over areas afterwards

If Paul has an excess of workers at the moment, he'll usually give them to Dwayne as he sees Dwayne as the most responsible one

If war is going on, he'll put them as ghost of soldiers of the enemy side, tricking them into attacking

Otherwise, he'll place them into causing war between their families

as punishment for their crimes in life

Sometimes animals wander their way into their realm, which of course, Dwayne uses to his advantage

He'll send them in the form of demons to cause anguish against people, causing their friendships to turn to ruin

The animals of course return to their afterlife, which usually consists of people in the good afterlives giving pets and companionship

Conquest - David

David loves to control, it makes him feel like he's the only one with power

While he knows this isn't exactly true, as none of the other boys can function without each other, he still secretly feels a little superior

He loves having power over people, since logically, in his mind, the boys could do without him

Dwayne sorta covers the conquest part since war often leads to the destruction and rebuilding of nations, fighting over boarders, etc.

If it can't be on a wide scale, he'll usually move to companies

Funnily enough, his "idea" for Walmart is what lead to it having a huge monopoly over other stores

It's less interesting to do it to families, since the natural conquest of generations over the other won't get challenged, especially since people are more willing to talk to each other in a healthy way

It makes David sick to hear humans getting along

If Paul and Dwayne don't have a use for any of the souls, David will gladly take them in

He loves having subjects and things it's unfair how many Paul gets

He loves to watch them bend to his every will

Since his specific part in bringing about the end of the world is less work, he'll mess with the souls

David will appear in human form, as a king of a new nation promising complete control over those who wrong the souls in life

Of course it's lies, but who cares? They're dead, and it's not like they'll have a shortage of dead people

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jennilah · 28 days

Note

I think i started to follow you bc of tiny!cas, like eons ago, let me tell you seeing you get into different fandoms over the years has been a delight.

I remember seeing post of you going like 'hey these slasher film kinda go hard' and look at you know.

I mean this in the best way possible, I feel i've been watching a house plant grow, every now and then catching my attention and being amazed by the changes

omg thats such a sweet way of describing my... well happy autism awareness day everyone, its a nice way of describing the way i naturally transition through my Special Interests lmfao

actually, for the holiday, let me infodump about this very aspect of my brain to anyone who isnt aware how this works for me. (also every autistic person is different, so this is just how this symptom manifests in me)

ill say "phases" to simplify, though thats an unfair word because it implies im "over" my past phases. 99% of my past phases are pretty much there for life, but in the back of my mind. (So long as I didnt have a "bad breakup" with it for some reason, which is rare but happens) The ability to become a raving lunatic about it is dormant until someone asks the right question.

There can only be one interest (sometimes 2, with one being the less dominant one) at the forefront of my brain at a time, though. that defines the "phase".

so for example, my recent Halloween phase is "over" and I am 100% fully into Saw now, but I still absolutely love Halloween and Michael and Jason and all those guys. as evident by me still happily sharing gifsets and art and buying merch etc if it tickles my fancy. They're just hanging out in the background of my mental display case.

yea whoever follows my tumblr for a very long time has watched it happen in realtime. the transition between interests. i know for a fact which phase I started this blog on. if you're here from the beginning, youve seen, in order:

-Durarara!! -Deus Ex -Supernatural -Godzilla -Detroit: Become Human -There was like a few weeks where it was HLVRAI -And then it was plants. There was a year-long stretch with no Special Interest and I was latching onto odd things (and I was very inactive here) -Halloween & Friday the 13th -and now, Saw

I have many other things I love, but they don't clamp around my brain in quite the same extreme way.

my phases can last any amount of time, anywhere from a few short intense months to 5+ years, its completely random, completely unpredictable. even the interest itself is impossible to predict. its not something i choose, its something that happens to me.

sometimes i avoid watching things for a long time because im still very emotionally attached to my current phase and im genuinely afraid the shiny new thing will replace it. all art or fic ideas for the previous phase? theyll be abandoned. all I will want to create will be related to the new thing. (though I will sometimes draw it anyway, like digging up old toys to play with once in a while. The likelihood just drops considerably)

which is why right now i pretty much put a pause on the other franchises I plan on watching. I'm genuinely gripping onto Saw like someone is tryin to take it from me.

and then sometimes im like "haha yeah right. ill be fine. ill eat my shoe if my brain latches to this" and then put on the movie and by the credits roll im a new person (yes thats what happened with Saw. I really had no idea.)

this is also why im terrified of even just "checking out" things that have, like, a toxic fanbase or something, because i cant stop a new phase from happening if it does. and its really hard to keep it to myself, fuck

(do u know how mad i was when i realized i was attaching to hoffman the evil dirty cop??? i was so scared of drawing him, dudes. but thankfully everyones been cool abt it and we're all very aware of his awfulness & we have fun w it)

and every time my brain changes and i do get obsessed with some new thing, i get really scared and worried and hope I dont bother everyone who followed me for something else :(((( and yet, every time, im absolutely floored by how many people choose to tolerate my newest nonsense and stick around anyway

anyway ive lost the plot of what point i was making here OH YEAH thank you!

tl;dr: that would be the autism! thank you, it WILL happen again! that is a threat! 🥰

#jennilargh #jenna answers

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