So subsequent to being a robodebt victim I sort of fell into this funk of ‘not only is there no point in trying, but in fact it’s better if I don’t, bc every time I have ever tried to do something good it’s backfired horrifically, so I’m just going to make like a tree and exist, no trying to do anything for myself, just drink some water, get some sunlight, and that is all’. And recently, after a few years of living a tree-like existence, I thought ‘you know, this is illogical, like there is no rational correlation between ‘trying’ and the universe taking a big shit on you, let’s just try again, yeah?’ So I signed up for a one hour a week job and the Australian government took that as an excuse to call up all of my previous employers of the last decade to ask for payslips and as an aside tell them all I’m homeless. Additionally all my online government accounts are being overrun with entirely fake income data from a century ago, not to mention apparently thousands of dollars in superannuation I have never had. And the logical part of me is just like ‘ok cool yeah, obviously they’re mistaken, someone just got their wires crossed, it’ll work out’, but that’s exactly what I told myself the last time a whole bunch of fabricated data was flying around my government accounts bc of robodebt, so I already know what’s coming. In conclusion: irrational belief system confirmed✅
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hold on I’m going to be emo about Digimon for a moment. The whole essence of the franchise is “my good weird talking dog loves me soooo much and all they want is to live peacefully by my side but when my life is threatened (which is often) they transform into an immensely powerful being just so they can give their life up for mine. And sometimes they do and sometimes they are reborn but other times they do not come back and there is no way to repay or fill their loss. And sometimes I betray them but they will forgive me forever no matter how I mistreat them. And sometimes they forget who I am but they will never stop following me because that love doesn’t go away. All they want is to stay small and get head scritches and snacks but the world gets threatened literally every day so they’re always fighting for me. We live in two different worlds and they can’t always be next to me but they’ll wait. They’ll wait years and even when I’m older and have changed they’ll know who I am. They don’t understand why I’ve changed but in their eyes, I’m still the same child.”
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the thing about the charming siblings is i want to make them tragic. you're perfect, I wish I was perfect. you're allowed to not be perfect. I resent you for being perfect. I hate you for being imperfect. I want to be a boy. I want to be a knight. I want to be you. I could be better than you. I wish your destiny was mine. I wish people loved me the way they love you. I wish she loved me the way she loves you. I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. I love you. I miss when we were friends. we never talk anymore. do you even care? you know nothing about me. you took my destiny. who am I? I'm supposed to be the responsible one. don't leave me. get away from me. when did you grow out of being a little kid? i miss home. the only place that feels like home is you. do you love her? do you love me? brother. sister. i was supposed to protect you. I'm sorry. I forgive you. nothing will ever be the same again.
it's about perfection and performance. it's about playing roles. everyone has their role to play. what if i want to be something else, something more. it's about femininity and masculinity. it's about not fitting in to either. is it about who you're supposed to be or who you want to be? I did it for you. I didn't ask for that. I'd burn the world for you. you never cared about me. I think of you always. there isn't room enough for all of us. i wish you'd never been born at all. I couldn't live without you.
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You know sometime you just didn't realize how similar Vlad and Danny are.
Until you tries to write them as friend.
but they keep graviting toward each other evolving into something more.
Like this is like my 17 re write now and it still resulted in Vlad sacifiescing himself so Danny could live caused Danny importance and impact on his life is way more importance to him then his own well being.
And don't get me started with the Groundhog Day where Vlad leaving caused they have a bad fall out essentially caused the worst timeline.
Danny even copy Vlad pun as a coping mechanism and Vlad adopting Danny old stoic behavior.
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Glancing at the Qian Jin-Xiao Li duo then at the Lu Guang-Cheng Xiaoshi one and realising that from what we know Qian Jin was originally the by-the-book type and even now is incredibly careful and thorough. Meanwhile, Xiao Li went along with the photo shop trio despite knowing how unbelievable it all seemed and was willing to arrange Lu Guang's safety in a less traditional way
Qian Jin especially in the past is much more aligned with Lu Guang personality-wise whilst the more flexible and intuition-based Xiao Li is more aligned with Cheng Xiaoshi
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(geoglyphs/dragon tears quest spoilers)
thinking about the way impa says “our zelda” after link tells her about the light dragon, and what zelda did to become it. thinking about how they were both her protectors before the calamity, and how neither of them are now. how they both still want to protect her. how impa waited for a century, how impa is old, how she cannot protect zelda anymore. how link is young. how he can protect her. how he can protect her for the both of them. how even if impa doesn’t protect zelda the way link does they both still do. how it is “our zelda.” how her protection is not links burden to bear alone. how it draws that distinction between their zelda— green eyes, princess, protected— and that beast in the sky. how it gives link hope. how it shows that, for 100 years and more, it has been zelda that both impa and link wanted to protect. how impa believes they can protect her once more, “our zelda,” the girl with green eyes who likes silent princess and studying history.
impa did not study the geoglyphs because they were linked to dragon tears. link did not touch those dragon tears because they were linked to a dragon. they both did it with the hope of getting closer to where zelda is, to find her, to protect her just as they have always done. thinking about the intimacy of sharing the same role with someone. of how only impa understands what it must be like for link to want to protect zelda, and vice versa.
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Please consider--Caleb finding out his Circus Man is fate touched, that as both Lucien and Molly his soul was always bound by the Matron's threads, and he's tangled up in that weave still. Caleb knowing all too well that mages in the Age of Arcanum held fate touched souls captive, used them as weapons and sacrifices in their petty power plays.
Caleb realizing that Lucien must have been singled out by the Somnovem, the ancient wizards preying on a destined soul that held so much promise. He sees the way King is drawn to powerful arcane relics still, to the siren song of danger and adventure and the spark of fateful desires. And he hears rumors. Of all Lucien's past dealings with the Cerberus Assembly, his trips to the Solstryce Academy, excavations in Molaesmyr--chance encounters where he and Ludinus might have briefly crossed paths.
So he tries to keep Tealeaf close, makes sure to keep an eye on his exploits at sea, draws a teleportation circle on his fearsome ghost ship. And vows he won't let another wizard control his Circus Man ever again.
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Smth smth theres a lot of readings for found family in kh, and found family doesn't necessarily mean seeing each other as familial but its interesting how Vanitas is the only character to actively 'seek' out an explicit familial connection in his 'brothers' who never reciprocate that sentiment and later 'dies' as almost a narrative punishment for trying to obtain it.
Which is to say, what did family mean to him and where he got the idea of brothers in the first place like that. And how his perception of family must be incredibly warped.
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"SL Ragnarok is a BL" just has to be one of the funniest things I've heard on a hanging threat like– mate I freaking wish but is there literally anyone out there in the SL world that wants Sung Suho as a partner?
Not a single girl with romantic interest has approached him in the span of 150+ chapters, it's definetly the same for boys.
Jin woo at least showed some attraction with JuHee and Cha at this point in the story, meanwhile the only thing on Suhos mind is killing.
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