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#these are literally for no one except me i promise
wcbblife · 12 hours
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Steps and Swishes
a/n: promise the next part will probably have more of the professional dancing lol
***
In moments like these, you can't help but appreciate your body's resilience, its unwavering stamina that carries you through the literal marathon of your day. But as you navigate this relentless sprint, you find yourself hoping there's still some fuel left in your tank when you reach the audition.
Waking up late was never part of the plan, especially not on a day when a crucial audition awaits. "Crap!" you mutter under your breath as you hastily exit your dorm room, clutching a piece of bread in one hand and your phone in the other. Each step is a stride toward salvaging what's left of your punctuality.
For the most part, things seem to be going smoothly as you dash towards the building. Until it’s not.
You wrench open the glass door of the lobby and dash into the elevator, heart pounding with each passing floor. Finally, as the doors slide open, you burst forth into a labyrinth of corridors, your destination painfully close. Or so you think.
Just when you believe the worst is behind you, you turn a corner and collide with an unexpected obstacle: a cascade of blonde hair and scalding coffee.
“Fuck!” The word rips from your lips as you stagger backward, the searing liquid seeping through your clothes. With trembling hands, you peel the wet fabric from your skin, eyes fixed on the ruinous stain spreading across your once pristine white shirt.
“Holy shit,” the figure mumbles, “I didn't mean that at all. Are you ok?”
A hand reaches out hesitantly towards your shirt, then freezes awkwardly in mid-air. It's the final straw.
Your gaze shoots up to meet the woman in front of you, ready to unleash a torrent of curses, but all words die on your tongue as you're confronted with wide, concerned eyes. Eyes that you know all too well, belonging to none other than Paige Bueckers.
Going to the same school as Paige Bueckers had never really stood out to you until today.
"I'm so sorry," Paige says, glancing down at your shirt, her hand still suspended awkwardly between you. Silence hangs heavy in the air. "I… I'll buy you a new one, I swear. Let me make it up to you."
In that moment, you realize that even if she were to buy you ten or twenty shirts, it wouldn't change the fact that you're about to miss your audition if you don't hurry. The inconvenience of the situation dawns on you in full force.
You let out an exasperated sigh, your gaze flicking from your stained shirt to Paige and back again. Then, once more, your eyes travel from her to your shirt. You can't help but notice how effortlessly chic and pristine her shirt appears compared to your own.
“Take off your shirt,” you deadpan without much consideration.
Paige's eyes widen further, resembling a deer caught in headlights. “W-what?” she stammers, inching away slowly.
You, however, couldn't care less if she looked at you as crazy. “You said you wanted to make it up to me?” you ask, raising an eyebrow before gesturing towards the bathroom behind her. “I have an audition in five minutes, and unless I want to blow my shot, I need to look presentable.”
The blonde hesitates, her gaze shifting between your outstretched fingers and the bathroom door. Then, with a slow turn of her head, you can almost hear the gears in her mind grinding to a halt. “And how does me taking off my shirt help you?”
“Just get in there and swap shirts with me,” you grumble, shooting her a soft glare. “It'll be quick. Once I'm done, you can have it back. Deal?” You silently pray she doesn't call the cops given how stupid and crazy you must sound, but the desperation in your eyes seems to sway her as she hesitantly nods.
“Alright, fine.” she sighs, walking towards the bathroom.
***
For the most part, the audition went relatively smoothly. Well, except for the fact that you received a barrage of odd looks for bursting in looking disheveled, with the invasive aroma of coffee clinging to you like a second skin. You could swear they caught whiffs of it every time you executed a dance move. But on the bright side, Paige's shirt did align nicely with the hip-hop theme they wanted, so hooray for small victories, you suppose.
Exiting the room, your shoulders sag immediately. Scanning the area for a familiar blonde, you finally spot Paige and make your way over, tapping her shoulder gently.
Startled, she quickly turns off her phone, giving you her full attention. “How'd it go?”
You shrug, not feeling up to sugarcoating it. “It was alright, I guess.”
Paige's expression deflates. “Gosh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to mess up your audition.”
“Nah, don't worry about it,” you try to brush it off, though your voice betrays a hint of frustration. “If I hadn't been such a klutz and actually woke up on time, I wouldn't have been in such a rush, and none of this would've happened.”
A brief silence lingers between you two before Paige breaks it. “Hey, let's make a deal,” she proposes, suddenly piquing your interest. “You can hang onto the shirt for now. I'll take this one,” she taps the stained area with her palm, “wash it, and give it back to you later.”
You raise an eyebrow. “Really? I'm totally fine with changing again. Why would you even let me take your shirt home—”
“Just…” she interrupts, sounding almost exasperated, “It's just a way for you to trust that I won't flake out and keep your shirt or something,” she mumbles, scratching the back of her neck nervously. “If you have my shirt, the only way I could get it back is by washing yours and swapping. I know it sounds silly.”
You chuckle. “Maybe just a little.”
Paige smiles, briefly averting her gaze before meeting your eyes again. “Just… let me clean it. I already feel bad enough.”
With a resigned sigh, you give in to her plea. “Fine, give me your number.”
Paige retrieves her phone with surprising speed, a wide grin spreading across her face. She clears her throat, opening her phone and displaying the number pad. “Are you usually around campus? You look like a student.”
After entering your number, you call yourself and retrieve your own phone as it starts to ring. “Yeah… I'm just looking for a part-time gig for now. Nothing too demanding.”
The blonde's interest is piqued. “So, what was the audition for?”
“Just some dancing,” you murmur, half-expecting her to burst into laughter like some others might. But instead, her reaction is one of genuine shock.
“That's awesome! KK would love you,” Paige jokes, and you audibly release a deep breath, grateful that there's no mockery in sight.
“I'm… flattered. Though I'm afraid she might work me to the bone with TikTok dances.”
Paige erupts into laughter, bending over in amusement before regaining her composure. “She might, but she means no harm, I promise,” she says, her expression turning more earnest. “You might have to swing by and show us some moves.”
“Hmm, I might just have to do that,” you reply with a smile.
Paige rubs her hands together awkwardly. “Well, I'll let you go. I don't want to hold you back any longer. I'll definitely text you.”
You nod, “I'll look forward to a white shirt”
She smiles before excusing herself. As you go about your way, you can't help but glance back, only to find the blonde has beaten you to it, snapping her eyes away from you in an instant.
***
The next morning breezes by in a blur. You manage your early classes and decide to take the afternoon off, indulging in a leisurely lounge session that rivals the pace of a sloth. Despite knowing you should probably get moving, the mere thought of tackling errands or practicing feels like an insurmountable task.
You flop onto your back on the carpeted floor, idly gazing at the ceiling until the tranquil silence is abruptly shattered by the muffled buzzing of your phone. With a lazy stretch, you reach for your phone, glancing at the notification.
One text message.
Sitting up, you unlock your phone.
‘Hey! It's Paige. You know, the girl who spilled coffee on you? Yeah, you probably remember that. Anyway… I cleaned your shirt, and I promise it's good as new. Do you want me to swing by your place or are you cool with coming over here?’
Your fingers move instinctively, typing a response before you even fully process it. After all, if THE Paige Bueckers was extending an invitation to her place, who were you to refuse?
‘I don't mind coming over there.’
Three bubbles appear in the corner of the screen.
‘Great! My room is 12C. Just drop by whenever you want.’
‘Alright, I'll be over in a few minutes.’
‘Perfect, I'll be waiting for you.’
You toss your phone aside, feeling an unexpected surge of energy coursing through you. Where it comes from, you're not entirely sure, but you're certainly not going to question it. Not when it propels you onto your feet in a heartbeat.
Without pausing to overthink, you head for a quick shower, ensuring you look somewhat presentable before getting dressed. There's a pitifully evident spring in your step as you make your way to her room, clutching her freshly washed shirt against your body.
However, all semblance of confidence evaporates upon coming face to face with the blue door, 12C stamped at the top. One. Two. Three seconds pass, and you find yourself rooted in place, your arm trembling slightly before dropping back down.
“Shit…” you mutter, suddenly feeling more self-conscious. But you gather your resolve and decide to just go for it.
Almost instantly, you hear shuffling from behind the door, accompanied by distant thuds before it creaks open. Two brown eyes peer out, catching you off guard. You barely have time to process before she gasps, almost comically.
“Oh my god, you're the coffee girl, aren't you?” The girl, whom you now recognize as KK, swings the door open wider, smiling like a child.
“Um… yeah, that's me,” you reply, scratching the back of your neck and holding up Paige's shirt. “I'm just here for a simple exchange.”
“Girl, come on in,” KK drawls, gesturing for you to enter. “She's down the hall to the left.”
“Thanks,” you chuckle.
It's pretty wild how much they're trusting you, but at this point, does it even matter?
You make your way down to what you presume is Paige’s room, rapping lightly on the door.
Paige answers swiftly, her attention seemingly elsewhere. “Kk, I swear to go—” Her gaze lands on you, and her eyes widen abruptly, words faltering. “Oh, my bad. Thought you were that airhead.”
“Hey!” Kk's voice rings out from the other side of the dorm, prompting a giggle from you.
“Come in, come in. I didn’t realize you were here already,” Paige says, opening her door fully. She strides over to her bed, where a neatly folded white shirt rests on top.
“I like your cologne,” you blurt out before even thinking, immediately regretting your lack of filter. You scramble for an excuse as Paige turns to you, her expression unreadable. “I-I mean, your shirt… I'm assuming it was your cologne. It smelled nice.”
She smiles. “Really? I’m trying something new. Must've smelled better than the coffee, huh?”
You step closer to her, the distance between you diminishing. “Anything would be better than that, to be honest. Imagine dancing while drenched in coffee.”
Paige winces, stepping nearer to you. She extends your shirt towards you. “Yeah, sorry about that again. But don't worry, I made sure it was all gone.”
Taking a moment to really take her in, you absorb every detail you may have missed in your earlier rushed encounter. The way her eyes sparkle, the curve of her smile, the subtle flex of her arms. It's almost overwhelming for your heart to handle.
“Here. I washed yours too.”
“Aww, you didn't have to,” she reply with a cheeky grin. “Now I owe you again.”
“I'm always up for some food,” you shrug, though you don't really mean it. “A broke college student will take what they can get.”
“Deal,” Paige says, her tone shifting slightly more serious. “We could even go now if you want.”
“Wow, didn't expect you to actually say yes. I mean, aren't you like… a celebrity or something around here?” you comment, feeling a mix of surprise and flattery.
Paige shrugs, a smirk playing on her lips. “What, are you worried they'll mistake us for a couple or something?”
“W-what? No…” you stutter, feeling your cheeks flush at the mere suggestion.
“I'm just messing,” she says, turning her head expectantly, her gaze soft yet playful.
It seems to effortlessly dismantle whatever defenses you had put up. “Fine,” you relent, smiling as Paige's face instantly lights up.
“Sweet. Hold on, let me grab my stuff,” she says, brushing past you, leaving you standing awkwardly in the middle of her room. You shift on the balls of your feet until…
“Psst!” Your head snaps towards the doorway as KK looks positively gleeful, biting her finger to stifle a laugh. “You're still gonna dance with me, right? Don't go flaking out.”
“Of course I am. And I’m going to beat you with all those TikTok dances,” you retort, a playful spark between the two of you.
KK gasps dramatically, clutching her shirt. “As if!”
“Alright, KK,” Paige interjects, returning from wherever she went, patting KK on the shoulder with a tad too much strength, causing the smaller guard to wince. “That’s enough.”
You catch the shift in Paige's tone, and she shrugs softly once she notices your gaze on her. “Let’s go?”
You nod and follow closely behind, but not before whispering a quick, “It's still on,” to KK, chuckling as her mouth hangs open in silent protest.
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beneathashadytree · 2 days
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I had a bit of a "hang in a minute..." thought when going through my 5*memory cards the other day. I started playing the last day of the drunk MC/Zayne and MC/sniffy sniff Rafayel event (I lucked out and got both, but not Xavier's) and it made me think that MC and Zayne have definitely bumped uglies (the business trip card is HELLO 👀) Whereas Raffy and Xavier are merely hinting at maybe, possibly doing the do.
There is another Zayne card that heavily suggests they banged, but I've been asleep since then and can't remember what card.
What do you think?
I will be sending another ask coz I just thought of something else!
I’ve gotten most cards in the game despite being F2P… except for the V-day cards🥲 But here’s my interpretation of this!
Like in the company’s previous game MLQC, the dates with the boys are scattered across different points in their timeline with MC.
For example, Business Trip Date is 100% after they’ve been long dating. After all, Zayne always strikes me as a particularly cautious person and definitely waited a long time to have sex with MC, due to the fact that he’s too worried about Astra’s curse to truly give in to his desires. Also the fact that he probably follows a “well-mannered” agenda to a T: ask them out on a date, kiss their cheek, kiss their lips, make out with them, sleep together, and so on. He’s also just naturally more reserved despite having a heart of gold, and so he’s probably careful with his own emotions, especially since he’s canonically had zero experience before MC. However, in other dates, like the almost-kiss one (forgot its name) you can see that it’s still in that awkward, early phase in the relationship where he’s holding back a lot of his feelings and it often backfires because it comes off as him being standoffish (Zayne is literally just me but in a different font😭😭). So currently? They’re not even dating. A little fast forward? Dating, but kinda shy. Massive fast forward? Sleeping together and teasing each other.
As for Rafayel and Xavier, the same also applies!! They’ve both respectively slept with MC and it’s heavily implied in the same way Zayne’s was. It’s only a matter of WHEN exactly that happened, since the dates are also all over the timeline.
Rafayel’s V-day card was lovely, but it certainly implies that he’s gotten more confident about being more risqué around MC. Despite appearances, he’s incredibly shy and embarrassed about intimacy at the start even though he deeply craves it, and that’s simply because of the way he grew up (being told you’re to be a refined God can’t have been too easy on him) and because of the fact that this is his first lifetime where he gets to be with MC without the constant threat of them being taken away from him. Being an artist also heightens his passion and his ability to tap into his well of feelings, so he can’t help the fact that he constantly desires to be with MC, and that translates into the natural progression of physical intimacy as he knows it. However, in the early days, he’s extremely careful about not toeing the line even when sharing a bed.
As for Xavier… whew. He’s just about the most forward, sneakiest one of the bunch, and I love the fact that it contrasts his endearing earnestness so much. Like, yes, he would absolutely burn the world to protect MC’s smile (he’s a little morally grey, after all, he just reins it in for their sake) but he’s just so so eager to pull the most sinful sounds from them in the name of his all-consuming adoration. The most recent card (the one with the gym clothes) makes it obvious that he’s more than willing to take the first step in their relationship, but it’s just a matter of him waiting for the MC to reciprocate. He’s careful, but makes his intentions VERY clear. During the V-day event, he’s easily the boldest out of the 3. It’s clear this is much later in their relationship, because he literally promises to keep them up all night (!!!) and is certainly okay with having them feel him up and act coy while he presses kisses to their body. On the other hand, in that one card with the Pocky game, they’re still at the stage in the relationship in which he can tease them and fluster them so easily by just surprising them with a kiss. So it’s pretty early on, I’d say.
Coming from the MLQC fandom, the messed up timeline doesn’t bother me, because I know that this is because in-game it hasn’t been long since they first “met” and the game hasn’t been released for long either. It makes sense that during dates, they wouldn’t be in a relationship yet. But since it’s an otome game, they have to feed the fans a little with indulgent dates set in the future to encourage fans to keep investing in the game and stay interested until they actually do start dating in the timeline (eg: 2 years later, maybe). And after that good long while, they’ll only keep pushing out dates where they’re already dating, and things slowly get more and more domestic. So it’s a game of patience!!
This turned out to be a massive rambling post, sorry😭😭 I’m pretty unhealthily obsessed with this game (as I was with MLQC years ago, honestly) so I love spinning my own interpretations of the lore and characters.
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vacationship · 2 days
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Sorry to do this guys… seriously big time TL;DR on the insanity of Rebecca’s predictions going nowhere. I stopped thinking about all this a long time ago but it’s coming back to me in a fever dream…
Remember when Rebecca went to the psychic and then all the signs starting with the green matchbook happened to her? And the signs came during encounters with two previous and one new love interest but these male characters subliminally or subtextually pointed to Ted?
Sam hands her the green matchbook for Ola’s and Rebecca is stroking it intently back and forth just under the letters as she’s trying to “read” the sign and then you realize you can REARRANGE the letters Ola’s -> Las’o?
Which you could maybe shrug off as coincidental except then…
She runs into John Wingsnight and he comes through with the Shite in Nining Armor prediction which calls back to Ted white knighting for Rebecca, but even more subliminally is the fact that John’s Manchester United scarf shows MAN then gets REARRANGED mid scene to show TED and then back again to MAN? (THEY TOOK THE TIME TO REARRANGE THE SCARF, TWICE.) And John who’s literally wearing the sign that Ted is the Man is talking about meeting the right person, his fiancée, a call back to Rebecca breaking up with John because she realizes how she really wants to feel with her right person, safe and trusting?
And the psychic was wearing army green and Rebecca finds in her purse the green soldier that Ted gave her to help her feel protected and safe stuck INSIDE the Ola’s (Lasso) green matchbook?
Is this not unhinged levels of endgame hints?
And then Ted takes out his matchbook from his pocket along with red and blue magnets? So they both still have the matchbook in their purse/pocket, such a personal private space, and each also have another item that also feels really personal and significant? The army man and freakin’ magnets? And there’s all these scenes with Ted and Rebecca with red and blue, like the magnets? And they’re MAGNETS but somehow not sticking together (two magnets in a pocket would definitely find each other) but this shows how they aren’t aware of how they fit yet? How they are soulmates? How they don’t know about their important matching date where they each experienced trauma? And Ted says how he has to bring these magnets back to work, his office, which is where he magnetically connected with Rebecca? She confesses, he forgives, she livens up the place? They hug in an embrace tight as magnets? And they were magnetically drawn to each other in the hallway at work when they each psychically picked up on what was going on for the other one?
And then Rebecca falls into the canal as predicted but is “safe” with the boat guy and he sings Kenny Roger’s just like Ted does? And there a few other parallels with Boat Guy/Ted? And meanwhile Ted is trying to reach her, and clearly misses her, but her phone is in the canal so Ted ends up on a little inner journey with himself and realizes he misses Kansas and his son but also figures out a soccer philosophy which he hopes will help him “win the whole thing” as he promised Rebecca? And when they reunite on the bus at the end they are both grinning ear to ear, maybe for different reasons, but the subtext is that each found their mojo again, their magnetism? And Beard sitting with them with a lightening suit on, matching the prediction from the psychic about thunder and lightening but also Roy telling Rebecca she should expect feeling struck by lightening with a romantic partner? Beard in the lightening suit is clocking what’s happening with Rebecca, that’s she’s been with a man and seems struck by lightening? But boat guy made her feel how Ted makes her feel?! But she was able to loosen up more with stranger guy but she looks at Ted and sings Everything Is Going To Be Alright? But what about the thunder? Is the thunder Ted, because Beard is def silently communicating with his best friend about Rebecca, showing us that Beard thinks Ted needs to pay attention to Rebecca?
To a human on earth lightening seems to come first, then the thunder, because sound travels slower than light. So thunder is still coming…Ted? And you can’t have thunder without lightning? Thunder tells you how close the lightening is. If you don’t hear thunder the lightening is very far away. Why is the thunder missing? Because Ted is still so far away from Rebecca? All of this was so meticulous, don’t tell me the thunder part of the prediction didn’t mean anything? The psychic said Thunder and Lightening and every other thing happened explicitly.
BONUS: And then remember how Ted ends up at Rebecca’s house due to a gas leak the night of the day he told her he was leaving, which leads back to Rebecca’s OWN prediction when she enters the psychic’s office and smells a funny smell? (This happens with psychics, your own latent abilities can turn on.) Plus Ted’s gas leak/fart joke about Beard, and his previous adorable fart song? Heart bent in my apartment because all you left was your fart scent? Gas leak, fart scent, apartment, get it? These are SNL guys remember? Did they seriously make a heartbreak song also about farts? Anyway, Rebecca always thinks Ted is funny? And she is heart bent that he’s leaving? They both are?
And this is just the prediction stuff? NUMEROUS other romcom parallels, signs, clues, tropes, whatever you want to call them, that Ted and Rebecca were going to turn around and see each other ACTUALLY HAPPENED?
And when his mother comes she makes a comment that Ted was FATED to live in England and she fluffs up his apartment with pillows and whatever else to make it more like home. Kansas and BBQ sauce may have been his home but the biscuits he makes for Rebecca reminds her of home, and it’s implied that for Ted, making biscuits for Rebecca and bringing them to her everyday was making Rebecca his home in Richmond. Where do you want to go each day when you are sad and lost and figuring yourself out? Home. So he devises a way to give Rebecca her home feeling while creating a home for himself with her. And his mom seemed to think he belonged there? And she never told him to go back to Kansas, she just said his son misses him? And his son loved visiting, loved soccer, and “has it covered” with training the men while Ted is up in Rebecca’s office and there’s that CRAZY shot of their hands meeting, framed perfectly by the circle of her purse handles as he gives her the biscuits, but anyway back to his son, it’s implied that he has a significant sense of belonging in Richmond, too? And in the last episode Ted ends up in Rebecca’s HOME? Right after the tv announcer says “he should have stayed with Rebecca. Now that was a power couple”? (I know it’s about Rupert but I’m sorry that was about Ted.)
I just like don’t know why they had to do this. This was so unhinged of them. And to say they didn’t enthusiastically consider the ship? You did all this!
@dollsome-does-tumblr @roamwithahungryheart @pinkboxess
@kdbleu
No need to respond just tagging a few of y’all that I’ve seen on here recently
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formulaonedirection · 2 years
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Max Fewtrell’s stream 11/02/22
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todayisafridaynight · 9 months
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Share Mine notes please I beg (and on the arakawa fam if you have the timefkfd)
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forgive me if these are messy as all fuck i'm not good at making notes BUT here's everything i generally keep in mind when drawing mine and hijikata + the reference sheets i look at when drawing them :)
arakawa family notes + references below:
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(more notes about aoki + sawashiro's faces ft. ikumi here)
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magentagalaxies · 3 months
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#i should've just gatekept scott thompson from my college bc the way my college is treating me right now is bullshit#like i don't even want to do the scott event anymore bc of how they're treating me but i kind of have to#and i know i should be grateful they're even letting me be one of the interviewers but i hate being a student so much#i hate how nobody respects my opinion or input or experience even tho i'm literally the reason scott's even doing this event#(and ESPECIALLY the reason he's willing to do it for free!!)#and it especially stings bc scott has never made me feel like my insights were worth less because i'm a student#like he's always been one of the few people who consistently treat me like we're equals even tho he doesn't have to#and the way my college is treating me. it's like they don't trust me to not be an annoying little kid#like they're just assuming scott doesn't respect me so they don't have to respect me either#i mean on the plus side i'm supposed to have another phone call with scott either today or tomorrow so i can probably explain the situation#like i don't want to make him feel negatively about my college i want him to have a good time#but this treatment is genuinely fucking with my self confidence#and also maybe i can harness scott's power to hear ''don't talk about this thing'' and immediately make the interview all about this thing#(except in this case it would be him treating me like an equal instead of a random student)#and there's a bunch of bullshit currently going on with the class i have right after the event#so even tho originally i was like ''awesome i have the perfect schedule to bring scott to all of my classes!!''#i might just ask scott if he wants to skip class together and hang out. like i never promised that class anything#the only thing i *have* to do is the interview. the class we'd be skipping is already being like#''oh are you sure scott wants to visit the class i don't want to take him away from a better use of his time''#and scott was genuinely excited to see what my classes were like!! even if y'all didn't treat him like a big celebrity!!#but y'know what i'm sure scott does have a better use of his time. and i do too.#i'm gonna do the interview event bc i have to (we're in too deep at this point)#and i might ask scott if he wants to talk to that freshman film class about the buddy cole doc#bc 1. they offered to pay scott for that (they can't legally pay me but that's why i made the joke about money laundering)#2. since it's about the doc it's the one class where i get to be treated like an actual person#but other than that. damn it i was excited to share this part of my life with scott but fuck that this part of my life sucks#i'm gonna have a good time with scott in boston and my college is only going to be as much a part of is as they have to be#because we ARE friends (scott said so!) and i AM a brilliant filmmaker (bruce said so!) and i DO have potential (bellini said so!)#even tho it is hard to internalize those things after how much yesterday fucked me up. but that's ok scott will call again soon
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lazaruspiss · 8 months
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My dick//babs "i loved you like a sister and thought that was good enough" agenda
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wikipedie · 1 year
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The way Merlin is a tragedy disguised as a comedy
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twilightarcade · 10 months
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FUNNY STORY ABOUT THAT PSOT ACTUALLY. I've adapted a few of your guys' likenesses into fiction people that I don't actually know in real life but have told my friend that I know and regularly interact with
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citrucee · 2 years
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little doodles about figuring out more about your mental illness after YEARS of a diagnosis!!! boy am i glad i figured it out i just wish it happened before i went on a whole arc about it!
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bibiana112 · 6 months
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I'm going to draw wktd fanart (to cope with a highly specific situation) while I still have the time for it (looming employment) and that is a promise to myself (I probably have something else I said I'd work on but whatever)
#I strt at the end of the month and I'm#I'm not even gonna say I'm scared I'm not I'm just not quite excited either? I'll pull through#and hopefully eat better and be able to buy fun things thaNK FUCK#however also taxes. I am not looking forward to taxes#like it's literally an ideal position if I don't manage it for whatever reason that'll be uh. something big for me to find out limits wise#but it's whatever I'm curious and I gotta try#and like I said god I'll be so happy to be able to afford hyper specific autism approved food that's gonna make everything so much easier#oh also the hyper specific situation? don't worry about it. just know I'm going to cry into whatever I draw for that game atm#I mentioned it in the post I made about it these days I literally skimmed through lines of one of the endings and immediately cried a single#Annoying tear. I feel like I don't cry about life things as much as would be healthy to and when I do I don't cry right#so I just get so annoyed at these sudden single tear moments when I'm not even putting effort into anything they just leak out#because something on a screen hit too close to home in an instant but I can't even properly Feel it because I'm focused on something else#and the thing in question has well been Acknowledged and rendered Irrelevant#it's not satisfying like crying for being engrossed on a story and/or characters and I absolutely hate how idk picturesque? it feels#people criticize drawing crying with a pretty single tear all the time it feels so fake and forced to fit the medium in a way that's still#appealing and consumable but I'm just a person with depersonalization issues. reverse derealization. everything's real except me#anyways I wasn't spiraling I will continue to not spiral about that at this moment but that's constantly there in my brain#and I'm going to draw the body horror lesbian polycule about it#Void fala aí#oh yeah I promised field sib content uh I can easily do that as a warm-up on a work day obviously pfft#''end of the month'' she's so pretentious you mean next week
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Me: okay that short little vegaspete oneshot I wrote on a whim got a lot of positive feedback and is one of my highest performing fics. Time to go back to my other wips. Maybe I'll finish up that angsty KimChay fic, or the Royal AU, or the kp x aftg crossover, or finally write some Arm/Tankhun, or maybe-
My brain: write more vegaspete
Me: but I just did? And I've been wanting to write these others for-
My brain: this time make it about that Oscar Wilde quote "love is a sacrament meant to be taken kneeling" except use the original intended meaning about an act love is being given a small act of compassion when you're in a vulnerable state AND make it about the common modern misinterpretation that the quote is talking about blowjobs.
Me: ......... fuck okay *opens new doc*
#the chokehold vegas and pete have me in is unreal#I went from uhhh no thanks to ok i can kinda see it to oh? to vegas pete and the hedgehog are the only characters in the show so fast#the irony of writing this about the wilde quote is that i already wrote a fic about that quote except for the rqg fandom#and its all soft vaguely romantic but could be platonic zolfwilde about zolf taking care of wilde and finding hope in each other#meanwhile the vp oneshot has already featured vegas brutally killin dudes pete being turned on by that some mild bloodplay and knifeplay#and more fucked up things to come <3#the rqg fic was about hope and comfort#the vp fic is about obsession and undying devotion to the point of total destruction#truly shows how you can take one thing (like the wilde quote) and create vastly different things despite having the same inspo#i WILL get to those wips i promise especially the aftg one that's been so fun to write#writing it has made me realize how insane neil andrew jean and kevin are compared to the kp characters#like im not even writing them in a dark au where they got more involved with the mafia they're all still dumbass exy players#but the aftg guys have the most fucked moral compasses and are completely desensitized to atrocities.#like what could kinn do to actually intimidate them? kinn cares too much about wanting to be good#even vegas would have no effect on them. they'd just be like 'oh great another riko good thing we know how to handle those'#he'd threaten to torture neil and neil would just stare at him like: literally almlst my entire body is covered in scars from torture#what can you possibly do to me that was done to me in like the first 20 years of my life? this is why you're a pathetic little bitch and no#one in your family will ever love or respect you.#i kinda wanna make a post of just vegas and all the times neil verbally came for rikos neck cause they fit too good
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plushie-lovey · 1 year
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Gonna freak
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queenxxxsupreme · 2 years
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Shit I’ve never watched a Tom Cruise movie a day in my (almost) 22 years of life and I swore I wasn’t gonna break that either
But seeing that Goose guy from Top Gun Maverick 👀
Edit: NOT TO MENTION I HAVE A THING FOR UNIFORMS SO THAT MILITARY SUIT THING HE WEARS 😩😩
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