#theos rambles

[sweetzscore]

Intro Post

Hello bastards!! Im sweetzscore, also known as Theodore, but you can just call me Theo, Ted or Teddy :)

Heres a quick intro post that may be improved later

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So uhh yeah like I said intro post!!! Yippeee

My birthday is 6/6, I’m a gemini and a minor :)

Source of current icon: Miya Chinen from sk8 the infinity <3

Self diagnosed Auditory Processing Disorder & Sensory Processing Disorder

Australian 🇦🇺

Please don’t send me chain asks

Fandoms

TMF/Freakblr, Good Omens, Murder Drones, Warrior cats, danganronpa, helluva boss, South Park, The Owl House, DHMIS, Heartstopper, TWOMP, OFMD, TADC, DDLC, ENA, Repo! and several others I’m forgetting

LGBT shit

I like to avoid putting strict labels on everything, but I mostly consider myself masc-leaning agender/fluid, bi/multisexual and aspec.

I’m currently experimenting with Pronouns, and what i’d like you to use currently are they/them, zey/zem, he/him and (occasionally) she/her

Bands/Music I like

Cavetown, Queen, Girl in red, Mother Mother, Hatsune Miku, The Living tombstone, Arctic Monkeys, BENEE, Lovejoy, Marina and the Diamonds, GHOST and pals, Queen, MCR, Alex G, Sir Chloe, Panic! At the disco, New Politics, 5sos and I will expand on this list later

Hobbies n shit

I like writing and drawing, crafting (Basically anything that gives me something to do with my hands) and discovering new pieces of media :)

My watchlist ↓

This can also be accessed through the ‘theos watchlist’ tag

Other blogs:

@jake-in-places-he-shouldnt-be (TMF gimmick blog)

@luke-tmfrp (Luke rp blog, TMF)

@thad-the-drone (Thad rp blog, Murder drones)

This blog is strictly pro-Palestine, Israel supporters DNI 🇵🇸

My DMs and asks are always open for any reason tehee

Other socials-

Picsart: sweet_sc0re

Discord: Moxxieyann

Funimate: sweet_sc0re

Quotev: sweetzscore

(The ‘theos rambles’ tag is probably empty i don’t think I use it) 🐀🥚

#intro #intro post #theos rambles #theos watchlist

[anqelbean]

Shen Qingqiu really wins the "Who has the weirdest In-Law" competition considering the fact that the first time he met his (soon-to-be) father-in-law he jumped on a coffin to hide in and said "Excuse me sir, do you mind if I disturb you inside?" And then Tianlang-Jun, from inside the coffin, replied "Yeah, sure, that's absolutely fine :)"

#SIR. #TIANLAN JUN. YOU FREAKING ICON #anqels ramblings #eva.txt #theo's reading corner #svsss reread shenanigans #svsss #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #tianlang jun #bingqiu #scum villain self saving system #mxtx

[kwillow]

Started this back in February when it was more topical but... I suppose no time is a good time for romance as far as Theo is concerned.

#doing a meme like the old deviantart days #good for the soul #theo #my draws #amaranthine #technically #i could ramble on about some of the choices here but perhaps it'd be best to let it speak for itself #also i think that's supposed to say “physical touch” but i couldn't find a font that matches to correct it #so my neurotic self had to leave the author's typo for the sake of aesthetic coherency #ok one piece of commentary: brain problems + highly repressed upbringing = where i put theo on the kinky slider. it had to be there #you should think less '50 shades' and more '50 year old guys waxing poetic about quicksand scenes in old adventure films' for that one #he's not a quicksand guy. but that's the vibe.

[red-might-be-dead]

can emizel just kiss soda and turn him into a vampire already im sick and tired of him being an alcoholic

#red rambles relentlessly #jrwi show #the suckening #emizel tucker #soda jrwi #theo jrwi #FUCKING KISS ALREADY YOU GAY LOSERS #fizzfangs

[priniya]

should i post or not(t)…

#niki rambles #theo nott x reader #theodore nott x reader

[arandompigeon5]

I really wanna see Theo just go fucking mental

like bro is currently a gang leader and has been in a gang for years I bet he can be fucking scary if he wants to be

Praying for Theo to fuck shit up this Saturday

#el’s rambles #jrwi #just roll with it #jrwi the suckening #the suckening #the suckening spoilers #soda jrwi #jrwi theo #jrwi soda

[geodaio]

first post and its moon knight stim hcs??? first post and its moon knight stim hcs.

ive literally been spinning these in my head for wayyyy too long, theyre half based on the show and half straight up just my hcs which are based on some of my own stims and i needed to share them SO:

Steven

it is literally canon that steven fiddles with his hands and sleeves, doing things like wringing his hands back and forth and just generally having a lot of little hands stims (i literally have reblogged gifs of his hand stims before)

i think he also fiddles with and runs his hands over different things, like different fabrics, to feel the texture of it (which is partially canon due to the scene in the Duat where hes running his hand over the pile of towels)

he also rubs the bottom of his sleeves and his shirts in-between his fingers to feel it! idk i just think hes a very texture stim sort of guy i think he loves feeling textures

pressure stims!!!!! he literally has this recurring motion that he does in the show where he holds his hands to his chest and i think he likes pressing down in a sort of half-hug motion to himself! i also think he sort of rubs over his heart when he does this sometimes

FIDGET TOY KING!!!! LITERALLY CANON!!!!! I think he has just more than the rubiks cube, i feel like he has other sorts of stim puzzles, maybe a fidget cube, things like that (i also think he would get really attached to those articulated stim toys that look like animals)

he would probably also make a lot of stim toys out of different objects, if you give him pretty much any object he will find a way to stim with it somehow

i feel like he definitely rocks back and forth, but it isn't very intense a lot of the time? it is more of a gentle sway, but he does it very often, especially when hes just standing still waiting for something

absolutely 100% a hand flapper, specifically up and down because he doesn't like the way that his fingers hit each other when he flaps his hands left to right

Jake

SOUND STIMS SOUND STIMS i think jake is such a sound stims guy

hes definitely big on whistling and humming, and makes a lot of little clicking and popping sounds with his mouth

he clicks his fingers a lot as well and moves his hand around while he does it so that the sound hits his ears in different ways (like a bat yknow? echolocation and all that)

loves to crack his knuckles for the sound and the feel, but has to shake his hands out a bit afterwards usually because they feel weird sometimes

he definitely has a stim where he taps the backs of his one hand with his other hand when hes wearing his gloves, because he loves the sound that his gloves make tapping against each other

he used to have a stim where he would drag his toe across the ground in shoes to make his leg bounce but then he would have to buy new shoes cause the toes would wear out so he does it less now

instead he rubs his shoes, specifically the toes, back and forth on the ground, specifically if hes sitting down and happens to have both of his feet on the floor

CHEWS ON FUCKING EVERYTHING if it can be chewed on, even if it shouldnt be chewed on, i guarentee he is chewing on it. i mean pencils i mean pencaps i mean zipper pulls i mean Anything-

he usually tries to have something edible to chew on at all times with him, usually some sort of hard candy, and he also has a chewing necklace that he wears a lot at the flat, and sometimes under his jacket if he feels like he'll need it when hes out and about

Marc

i feel like marc has a lot more subtle stims (hello masking!), unless hes around people he trusts

he definitely has a chewing stim, but specifically softer things like fabric and soft chewing necklaces

he bites on the edges of his sleeves when he is at the flat, specifically when he is thinking, or blankets and pillows if hes overwhelmed

if he not at the flat he usually just grinds his teeth if he has the need to chew on something, he constantly has jaw aches because of it

he rubs his hands and his knuckles over his thighs a lot and taps his fingers on his legs

i definitely think he clenches his fists over and over again before stretching his hands out like he wants to flap his hands but is too tense, especially in public

when he starts to unmask more he definitely does a lot of hand flapping mixed in with gesturing as he talks

he also cracks his knuckles and his wrists out repeatedly both for the sound and the feeling of it, he does it a lot when hes out of the flat

he also has a stim where he rolls his shoulders back and stretches out his neck? he isn't quite sure if it really is a stim but he does it for the same reasons that he does all of his other stims so it counts

i also think he rocks up onto the balls of his feet a lot and back down, mixed with a bit of rocking? this feels like one that he only really does when hes comfortable with who hes with

JUMPING!!!!!! THIS IS LITERALLY CANON!!!! he jumps up and down and tucks his legs up when he does to get more height and i think that he does it when hes really excited about something

#moon knight #marc spector #jake lockley #steven grant #moon knight system #autistic marc spector #autistic steven grant #autistic jake lockley #autistic moon knight system #moon knight hcs #this literally took me multiple months to complete and post because i kept changing things and thinking of new things LMAOOOOO #and i kept getting stuck on marc for some reason??? #because i genuinely. cannot remember what it was like to mask despite only starting to unmask recently #but anyways are a lot of these projection? yes. #yes they are. #theo’s ramblings

[yourrockdog]

i think everyone on the tgf tag is far too normal in the sense that there’s not enough freaky shit going on in any fan content. why am i the only one in the world to consider a blatantly toxic, codependent, all-consuming psychosexual friendship/brotherhood/romantic relationship between these two people that obviously fit into this category. they would not get married they would not be boyfriends but i think they would accidentally tear each other to pieces in trying to unravel how complicated and unspeakable their connection is. let them be taken over by their fucked up beyond repair animal nature and let that seep into their bond. let them be parallel and intersecting at the same time. let them be unable to separate themselves, not knowing where the influence of the other ends and the essence of the original starts. let them hate themselves for it. we can uplift toxic yaoi in 2024 believe me

#believe me when i say they’re not normal and i’m not delusional for saying it #there’s some fucked up shit going on with those two #god knows they would maul each other to death before they worked through all the years of pent up emotion between them #tgf #the goldfinch #boris pavlikovsky #theo decker #rambling #toxic yaoi win

[merry-harlowe]

Happy indigenous history month! The Jay Treaty, signed between Canada and the United States, is a treaty that protects the rights of aboriginal peoples to cross the U.S.-Canadian border freely without being charged taxes or duty. Rlly cool, except that Canada completely doesn’t uphold or acknowledge the treaty, and while the United States does permit indigenous individuals with proof of a 50% or higher blood quantum to cross, they don’t uphold the part of the treaty concerning taxes or duty.

Borders are fake, the us and Canada are oathbreakers, and I am stuck in the states bc I got turned away at the border due to issues with my car not being able to be imported to Canada and also that costing like 5k. Help ur local 2s ndn buy a bus ticket home to Canada? 😅 my kofi link: https://ko-fi.com/theodoresart0052

#theo rambles #ive been driving my car back and forth for three years but apparently yesterday it was an issue? #and I got told that if I tried to cross with it again id be arrested for smuggling. so. ig i am leaving it w family and taking the bus home

[petersthree]

Hello Theobel besties do we have any song suggestions for these two bc I have a solid (4) on here and feel like I’ve forgotten every song ever

#theobel #mabel x theo #theo x mabel #I’m usually a stickler for lyrics but sjsksksks content is limited LMAOOO so I might be more lax idk 😂 #janie rambles #omitb spoilers

[mayonesavegana]

Today I discovered through my favorite characters that my type is smart people, nerds, sunshine idiots, women who could destroy me and boys who could be Spider-Man.

#please talk about your special interests #please be awkward and tall and skinny #if you start rambling I might fall in love #tell me fun facts and random trivia #denki kaminari #spencer reid #tim drake #cassandra cain #hiccup haddock #logan mitchell #gwaine #gwen stacy #nico robin #dick grayson #stiles stilinski #danny phantom #theo raeken #I know he’s evil but he’s smart and I like that #kate sharma #jazz fenton #remus lupin #superboy #barry allen #anyone from the flash family #wonder woman #monkey d. luffy #tmnt donatello #izuku midoriya #peter parker #emily prentiss

[anqelbean]

Someday I wanna write a canon divergent fic where instead of acting suave and cool, Binghe trips at the stairs at Jinlan City and gets caught by Shen Qingqiu only to start sobbing in his chest like the pathetic little babygirl he is.

#and then they kith..... #anqels ramblings #eva.txt #svsss #theo's fic ideas #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #bingqiu

[wataksampingan]

This was supposed to be some form of Therdeo Dane Lapileon Defense Thesis but my brain cannot pull off all the necessary research to do it justice.

So I guess let’s just brain dump all my thoughts and feelings?? About this manhwa?? (Spoilers for the story up to episode 63 on Webtoons and 66 on Naver Webtoons)

...this also gets FAR too long so cut is here for sanity’s sake. Tl;dr Theo Lapileon is a wounded puppy and I want him to be happy gdi

I need to preface the Theo content by saying that I adore Pereshati. I think she’s one of the more realistic heroines that I’ve read, in the sense that she’s plucky and determined but she damn well knows how the game is played. Every move she makes is plagued with doubt and uncertainty coz she’s only a minor noble, and one with an unbelievable story at that. (Resurrecting after being fed poisonous blood and getting thrown back in time is a stretch for anyone). But whenever she does decide to do something, she handles herself with the kind of poise you’d expect from a grown woman who knows how polite society works. It’s the kind of elegance and maturity that the novel’s Perry doesn’t have.

I wonder very much how seungu would have thrown Perry into Theo’s way if they had had full control of the adaptation because the first... 10? episodes or so reads very much like a typical isekai manhwa: she’s murdered, she awakes, and then immediately besieges Theo with a proposal, simply because he needs to marry someone to get the emperor/princess off his back. The Perry we see currently in the latest chapters would likely have done something smarter/more socially acceptable/conventional simply because imperial pressure or no, why the fuck would the grand duke entertain a minor noble they’ve never met before?

Granted, this is quite in line with Theo’s character in the first few episodes as well (which is lampshaded in a later chapter AND I LOVED IT) whose excuse for entertaining her absurd request/proposal is just “I got curious about the woman who kept bombarding us with messages”. The Theo we see later, who just burns letters from the Fourth Princess Dodolea without even thinking about it, would have hardly buckled under that kind of insistence.

This is all pure speculation of course because the artist, seungu, has no social media I could trace. The original novel’s writer, Han Yoonseol, has Twitter and various socmed that show an active writing career and interest in the MILAOWM webtoon. But the artist? Nothing, apart from their work. They’ve completed a previous series (Google translated to “New Year’s Taste”) but that also seems like an adaptation. I have no access to their thought process, rationale or any inkling of why certain decisions were made. 

Whatever the case though, those decisions so far have me hooked. They’re making changes that reflect something more... realistic, with higher stakes and actual consequences for the actions of the characters. E.g. you can’t humiliate, much less threaten, members of the nobility at a public function in front of a crowd without some sort of retaliation. Theo in the novel actually threatens to kill a nobleman in cold blood in front of a gathered audience whereas Theo in the manhwa does this in private.

Well, I say threaten. In the manhwa, he has just a fraction of the dialogue Novel!Theo says. Just one or two lines before he snaps and is about to decapitate a mofo before being restrained by his guards. The bullying incident that precipitates this is also dealt with realistic actions and importantly, contains a reflection on Perry’s part about the power and privilege the Lapileons have in this universe. I don’t know if this foreshadows anything but my mind has gone as far as the dissolution of the empire/defection to an enemy kingdom (and the loss of their noble titles) by the end of the whole manhwa. Far-fetched? Maybe, but I have so much faith in seungu by now and so little idea of what they’re planning that I won’t be surprised.

Manhwa!Therdeo Lapileon is also extremely taciturn and poker-faced, to all the natural disadvantages this sort of personality entails. Everything we know about him is told in silent images, or expressions we explicitly don’t see. This is a man who believes in actions over words, who has no idea that open communication is a Thing and that doing stuff behind a person’s back without telling them can backfire at times (”I’m gonna have someone follow my wife’s ex-fiance around without telling her, and that got her kidnapped. SHIT.”) And all the backstory that’s been hinted at so far gives us very sad explanations how he turned out this way.

One could very justifiably argue that actually, the entire Lapileon family is a collection of sad iron woobies. Saoirse lost her husband and only son because of her own blood, Phineas is doing his level best to save his family but keeps seeing them die despite his medical expertise, Gloria probably had a HELL of a marriage to survive this long, and the poor children have had their own bouts of suffering and daddy issues. And of course there’s also Pereshati who’s been murdered about 3-4 times at this point, and lost a most beloved father to a stepmother she loved to the moon and back.

BUT. Theo.

If the housekeeper’s flashback in Episode 47 is anything to go by, and if I’m guessing right, Theo and Saoirse’s father (maybe grandfather? Unclear at this point but let’s go with father for now) was a nightmare of a man. Slaughtering servants for infractions was probably a regular threat in the Lapileon home, and judging from that flashback during the episodes when they first find Islette, so was torturing and testing his younger son’s limits. His survival in the family was due to his “usefulness”.

One can suspect that of the three siblings, Theo was the one with the softest heart. We have no idea what his older brother (Celphi’s dad) was like yet and Saoirse is a Lapileon to the core: toughened enough to do what is needed, hardened even further by tragedy. She’s also a mom, which is why harming Islette earned Gen a rightful and vicious stiletto-heels-to-the-face-ass kicking. It also gets Theo a reprimand: get his shit together or step down from the headship of the family.

(And I’m just. Saoirse, honey, I love and respect you immensely and to be stepped on by your footwear of choice would be my honour. But that’s your younger brother we’re talking about. And he’s been emotionally sucker punched in just about every aspect. He’s trying, okay?)

I’m just saying that when you’re a child, and abused to that degree, sympathy from the devil is still sympathy. Of course it echoes to the present day even as a full-grown, supposedly rational adult. Of course it’s going to fuck you up.

You were also probably raised to put family above all (witness Theo not trusting Perry with the full truth of Celphi’s condition until circumstances force his hand, Saoirse only fully warming up to her once it’s clear she loves Celphi without any ulterior motive, Gloria immediately expecting her to be wrong about the family blood being sold, only to be confounded by the awful truth that this stranger to the family was right). You’ve been operating on the full expectation that any Lapileon would follow that creed. How could they not? Their curse is too great a responsibility.

Then you’re forced to confront the devil who once gave you rare comfort as a child, and that devil bears your family name and blood. Not only does he spout the most heinous things you’ve never imagined, he also manages to hit you where it hurts: you have used your blood. You have used it for your own benefit. Are you truly no better than he is? Who are you to judge him?

(Never mind that the devil is a liar and is trying to save his own ass which is why Saoirse, who has a better understanding of her own identity and self-worth, doesn’t give him enough time to say anything - she just kicks the shit out of him)

Is it any wonder Theo hesitates to do anything harsher?

Everything he does implies a reluctance to inflict lethal force if it can be helped. Perry remarks on it when he first removes Schiff without killing him the day they got married. He doesn’t even draw his sword on the assassin at the parade, merely KICKING HIM INTO ORBIT subduing him long enough to be taken in by the guards. The only times he has killed someone in the story is Perry’s ex-fiance who had kidnapped and blackmailed her, and... well, Perry herself.

(Which again goes back to that weird early episode installment - how do you reconcile him feeding her his blood in such a cavalier manner with the gravity of his responsibility as head of the family to ensure their blood isn’t used exactly like that?

You give him a HUGEASS dose of remorse and guilt later on when Gen accuses him of also using the blood to his own advantage, and then have him offer a sincere apology to the woman he experimented on.)

He also very nearly murdered the father of the child who bullied his ward. But even that was prevented by Raymon, the guard. This is more speculation on my part but his personal guards - who are all loyal to him beyond a doubt - may have been instructed (by him?) to restrain Theo, maybe to make sure he doesn’t repeat the sins of his father who just murdered people as and when it suited him. I don’t know if seungu would even bring this up at some point but I’ll be thrilled if that is the case.

This abusive childhood is compounded by the trauma of war. Theo specifically is credited with just swooping in out of the blue and ending the conflict between the Castor Empire and the kingdom of Schwartz. His reaction to being hailed a hero is to show up covered in blood to report to the emperor, and then disappear back to the country without attending any ceremonies. It earns him the notorious reputation of being “the bloodthirsty war fiend”.

Judging from Episode 13, what he really earned was a lifelong diagnosis of PTSD and various other neuroses. “Fuck this noise, I’m going home” was a reasonable reaction from a man who has no care or time for polite society. I'd go a bit further to suggest he also didn’t want to hear his actions being lauded as heroic when all he experienced was violence and death (re: that line about him being glad his statue was destroyed, that it’d been a stain on his honour). Whatever he did was to satisfy the emperor who has some form of hold over him, and absolutely no respect for the Lapileons (every single reaction from any imperial family member, even creepy Dodolea, has been sneering condescension or reluctant compliments). So from that perspective, why the hell would he have stayed to schmooze at the castle?

There are no therapists in Castor clearly coz Theo does what most soft-hearted introverts do and represses the shit out of his trauma. Just... stuff it WAY down into the depths of his subconscious and never address it because what the fuck else would you expect him to do? Talk about his ~*~feelings~*~ in the Lapileon house where weakness is a death sentence? No, he bundles it all behind his iron mask and resigns himself to literal nightmares for the rest of his existence.

The timeline has yet to be properly established, but I'm guessing that he comes back from war only to find that his brother has died and sister-in-law has just upped and left. Which means baby Celphi is left in his care. I’m not sure why Saoirse wasn’t the one to adopt him, but I’m guessing since he’s the next in line to the grand dukedom, it ‘makes sense’ that Grand Duke Therdeo has to be in charge of him. (Saoirse not being able to become head of the family just because she’s a woman is another sticking point that I suspect will be key to resolving this entire mess) (how/when exactly he becomes Theo’s ward is subject to many theories since the timeline of the story hasn’t been actually clearly explained; a guess that a friend and I have settled on is perhaps at the time, securing Celphi’s place as a ‘spare heir’ after Saoirse, Saoirse’s son and Theo in the line of succession would have been a practical decision. Either that or, more plausibly, Theo saw Celphi in himself and just decided to adopt the boy. Which makes this next part even more tragic)

The image of Theo in a soldier’s uniform looking helplessly into the cradle, with baby Celphi reaching up to him, broke me when I first saw it. It explains every mistake Theo made in trying to raise him.

He was a soldier. What the hell would he know about raising children (even if the theory that he chose to adopt this boy is correct)? He loves this tiny child with every breath, and he’d do anything for Celphi - but most of what he knows is how to fight and die. How the fuck does that help?? Not only that, his only experience of fatherhood is the shadow of a man who abused him so severely. What is that supposed to teach a man about parenting?

Clearly not much, considering his very shocked reaction when Celphi ends up demanding what he was supposed to think when his guardian/uncle kept ignoring him all the time while he was growing up.

And the boy is correct. Theo has no answer. He fucked up (again), and he didn’t know he was fucking up so hard.

But my god, he keeps trying to make up for it. It’s awkward and uncomfortable, but Theo shows up every day to pick him up from school with Perry; he’s even glad Celphi yells at him about killing Perry because that means he’s not turning out to be Therdeo 2.0. Celphi is expressing feelings and opinions and even if they turn the boy against him, so be it - at least it’s coming out. It may be too late for Theo to learn how to express emotions but at least his ward won’t make the same mistakes.

Which is why IT HURTS SO MUCH IN EPISODE 63 TO SEE HIM SO CRESTFALLEN. After suggesting to Perry she stay away from the Lapileon house for a while, she says she will and the dialogue translates to:

“Thank you for your kind consideration.”

THERE ARE THREE - T H R E E - PANELS where his face/expression isn’t shown at all but you can ABSOLUTELY TELL HE’S 360 DEGREES OF ANGUISHED.

This woman - this beacon of hope that he’s come to have feelings for (all the subtle blushing and unseen pining looks have been sprinkled very well throughout the chapters so far) - has just had to go through the ordeal of a trial (along with months of preparation before that) where she had to send her stepmother to 35 years of hard labour, among other things, for the murder of her father. She's just had to reconcile the mother she knew with the killer sitting in the dock, and the cries of a stepsister she once loved. And all this with the knowledge that it's the Lapileons’ blood that ultimately killed her father. There’s a stray thought that poisonous blood or no, her stepmother would have found some way to kill her dad.

But it doesn’t change how it was their blood - his blood - that killed Count Zahardt. It is Lapileon blood that has tortured Perry, the woman responsible for bringing out the best in his adopted son, discovering little Islette and bringing warmth back to this frozen wasteland of a household (to paraphrase Daniel Molton who is a treat of a character, I love him so much).

Yes, he's essentially thrown his immense resources into legal recourse, released her from their obligatory contract, and offered her help in being independent and free from them. He's done many, many things to try and make her current situation comfortable.

Yet the fact remains that she basically rescued so many parts of his life, and he inadvertently destroyed hers. Nothing he does will bring her father back.

Yet she won’t curse him or his family, won’t demand any form of recompense, won’t even give him the cold shoulder, despite everything in her that says she should. Her line “leave me be so I can resent you” is so good and so sad and my HEART disintegrated.

The most ironic thing is that Theo would’ve probably understood that reaction better. The justified reaction would have been to storm and rage at him. He knows what to do with anger.

Instead, she said thank you for your kind consideration.

And he can’t say anything to that as she walks away.

HIS LIFE HAS BEEN AND IS FUCKING SAD. AND IT’S GOING TO GET WORSE.

Episode 64 is already up on Naver and Dodolea is about to do a NUMBER on his ALREADY VERY FRAGILE PSYCHE. What she calls love - and what some of us may have suspected as straightforward obsession for his attentions - is seeming more and more like a love of torturing him, and watching him squirm.

He has to sit for a portrait in the palace (emperor’s orders probably because he just wants to jerk Theo’s chain around), and cannot escape when she comes into the room to sit and watch. There’s no good reason for him to leave, so he just has to grit his teeth and bear it.

And she laughs at his discomfort. She laughs and calls it “cute”.

The rage and fear in his face when she does so is alarming from someone whose poker face is usually immaculate. It sucks so much strength/spirit from him that it alarms Daniel who greets him at the house. I have a feeling that he’s about to just shatter into pieces since Episode 66′s thumbnail has him turned away, lying on a pillow. And then I will shatter, coz this dude CANNOT catch a break.

At some point, I came to the conclusion that Theo was soft-hearted and I cannot tell you when exactly that was. It's testament to how seungu weaves in his quiet charm throughout the chapters so we can see why Perry might possibly fall for him apart from his handsome face (even if at this point, that is the FURTHEST thing from her mind). There are huge things of course like rescuing her from her kidnapping and financing her legal battles.

But the little warm things speak volumes: learning how to dance so he could accompany her to a ball, saying yes immediately when she suggests maybe he could just reply to people, telling the servants to make her special tea when he found out she also had trouble sleeping, bringing a hot water pack(?) to ease her cramps, rushing back for her auction, squeezing her hand as he helps her into the carriage because that’s all he can do after the trial. (seungu did you also watch Pride and Prejudice (2005)? Did you see the hand flex scene and immediately decide to use this? Inquiring minds must know. Also inquiring minds screamed when they first saw that scene becausE HAND TOUCHES ARE GOLD BULLION IN SLOW BURNS) And just his face (?? back of his head?? seungu never gives us any idea what he looks like when he’s in ‘oops fell in love AGAIN’ mode)

BUT SOMEHOW YOU CAN JUST TELL:

They all tell the story of a broken man who has made so many mistakes, but he can be kind and attentive, and tries hard to do what’s right (even if it takes him awhile to figure out what’s right, coz again: he’s Fucked Up). He’s also a socially awkward dork who ignores people at parties coz he doesn't know how to behave as expected. And resembles a really sad puppy when he disappoints Perry.

I could speculate a lot more on what/who the fuck Dodolea actually is and how she’s related to the Lapileon’s curse, but I also know this manhwa has steered some distance away from the webnovel. So I cannot really tell if the plot lines will be similar.  

I’ll probably be back after the plot progresses further so I can scream some more. I’ve been shrieking on Twitter but that site is subject to a hungry ghost’s whims and I can’t hide spoilers/rambling behind cuts there. So here it will have to be.

Hang in there, your grace.

#theo lapileon #pereshati jahardt #is this character analysis? plot analysis? the ramblings of a diseased mind?? #ALL THREE? #episode 63 sent me into the stratosphere #which is why you get this disorganised tangled mess of word vomit #my in laws are obsessed with me #my in-laws are obsessed with me #MILAOWM #apparently it should have been Theodore Lapileon and Princess Dahlia?? #that makes way more sense #OH WELL dodolea is funnier anyway LMAO

[red-might-be-dead]

when theo said 'if shilo is your brother he's mine too' he didn't mean it like him and emizel are brothers he meant it like shilo is his brother IN LAW because theo and emizel are married

#they are gay and in love #red rambles relentlessly #jrwi show #the suckening #emizel tucker #theo jrwi #soda jrwi #fizzfangs #the suckening spoilers

[priniya]

i totally love the headcanon that theo is italian, but my polish ass is hc him as at least a 1/4th eastern european (polish preferably) with strong grandparents influence that keeps him indulged in the culture and traditions (that’s why he’s so dead inside)(it would explain his nicotine and alc addiction)

prove me wrong 😘😍🥰👍

#theodore nott headcanons #theodore nott #theo nott headcanons #niki rambles #theodore nott x reader #theo nott x reader

[theo-grayson]

playing the our life dlc for the first time. .. . ohbg.. . .

#im only on step 2 but #thbe one with the homework #i lost mine and was so stresses and we couldnt find it #and cove was like 'here. take this' and it was HIS hw #and i was like '? what? this is yours?' #and he was like 'i dont know what you mean' #HE WANTED TO GIVE ME HIS HOMEWOKR SO I DIDNT HAVE TO START OVER #A HEEM A HEEM HIC SOBS #bro i . i . oh.hg. #our life #our life beginnings and always #olba #ol:ba #cove holden #dude. i get to play the wedding dlc. i get to marry cove holden #whole body vibrates uncontrollably #i love cove holden a normal amount. #anyways. sneep time #theo rambles