#thats part of why i still use lex... it's not bad when it comes to just chatting with people | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

floosies · 2 years

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Salvatore

pairing: mob!jake lockley x oc!fem

warnings: slow burn, pining, cursing, mentions of violence, future smut, mentions of dr*gs 18+ ONLY

tagging: @lex-the-flex

"I don't need the world to see that I've been the best I can be, but I don't think I could stand to be where you don't see me..."

Everyone who knew Jake, knew that he did a good thing by all accounts but given the lifestyle he was in, there would have to be consequences for his outburst. At least that was what Rogers bullshitted out when he went to go talk to the guy. In reality he was happy someone put the guy in place.

Although he wondered if it was more than just to do with the fact that it was Barnes' name. He gave Jake a good stare down, "its better to be honest with me than to have to face her uncle." Choosing his words wisely, he shrugged, "she's a nice lady is all." Rogers rolled his eyes, "yeah and I'm the king of England." Still Lockley wasn't that kind of guy, even if it was more than what he was leading on.

Nothing really came from the matter, but he was told he could no longer attend events where the prick who was talking shit was going to be at. Which honestly was fine with him, he didn't like those people anyways.

A month after all that had happened at the benefit it was beginning to near time for another one of the meetings. This time he was more eager to actually attend. He would never admit it, but he wanted to know if she would want to see him seeing as she probably already knew. Still he hadn't heard anything from the Barnes family. Really his main concern was coming from the Russian who he had recently started working with.

Alicia expected him to get there early as he always did so she made sure to have things ready. In the itinerary there was a mention of Romanoff wanting to bring up a concern which she hoped was nothing serious.

The ring of the doorbell stopped her overthinking. One of her uncle's maids got to the door before her but she went to greet him anyways.

Her smile was something he hadn't really seen until now, "hey. Early, as always." She nodded, "I thought you would be so I made coffee while you wait for everyone else." She led him to the kitchen where it was.

As he poured his mug she took her chance, "I wanted to say thank you for taking care of that." He shrugged, but gave her back a half smile, "he shouldn't have been talking shit." She chuckled, "trust me they all do." He shook his head, "yeah but they don't know the shit you went through."

That comment made her tense up, "what do you mean by that?" Shit, "nothing bad. I mean your uncle he told me the story. I just wanted to know the truth-" she cut him off "so you went behind my back to know something about me?" He should have just kept his mouth shut but it was too late.

"You weren't going tell me the truth. If i'm supposed to be part of this group, I don't want secrets. I get now why you don't like to talk about it-" she was thinking faster than she could talk, "so you punching that guy wasn't out of respect for my family so much as it was because you feel bad for me? You think i'm weak." The anger and disappointment in her voice was very clear.

How did he end up with his words twisted, "no. I respect that you were able to survive all of that and still choose to live in this kind of life. I punched that creep because he was disrespecting you as a person. I never said you were weak and I don't think that. Que tienes?" She didn't buy it, "but thats not what you were thinking, was it?" He sighed, "I really don't want bad blood between us, we're friends and I was sticking up for you." It wasn't enough, "I'm sorry I went to your uncle looking for your story alright?"

Truth be told, she didn't want to lose his closeness either. Taking a deep breath she calmed herself, "I accept your apology. Next time just ask me for the truth if you need it that badly." She left him there after that, if she focused on her work instead it would calm her down.

The meeting went on smoothly as usual, until it came down to the personal concerns and request part, where Romanoff had asked to speak on something. Her concern came from an outside source, it had to do with where her product was headed with regard to Jake's routes.

Lockley couldn't believe the shit he was hearing. He rolled his eyes, "you get your money back and then some. The product goes to whoever purchases it off my men." She didn't care, her concern was in the consumer as she feared ties to well off people. He was beyond irritated by then, "yeah no shit. Rich kids like snow, also its gotta be against some code or some shit to have 'outside sources'" he mentioned with air quotations.

Alicia and the others could sense that it was only going to get more tense if they didn't intervene. So she did as she had done at the start of all this, she intervened, "alright. Both of you need to calm down. There is protocol." Her uncle nodded, signaling for her to take the lead. She looked at Romanoff first, "we've agreed no outsiders unless we all know them and trust them. Where did you get your information?" Jake was waiting to see what came out of the Russian's mouth.

It'd come from her 'sister' and as she said explained it all everyone around the table scoffed or sighed rubbing their face. As Alicia explained, she was a rogue who worked for pay, no matter who was paying. This only further pissed off Lockley. It was bad enough he had fought with Alicia, now he had to deal with rich people gossiping about his work.

They came to an agreement which was simply that they wouldn't work together anymore. He wished he could have said that to all of them. Alicia could see the anger in his eyes, there was no masking his frustration and while she knew they'd fought earlier this was something else and she didn't want him to make the wrong move. As soon as her uncle closed the meeting and they all got up to go into the dining room, she followed close behind Jake as he headed for the door. Her uncle and Rogers watched glanced at her, she waved them off. They only hoped she could help the situation, no doubt in their minds that she was the only voice of reason for him.

Once outside the home she began to speak, "I know you're upset with what happened in there but don't act on impulse." He really didn't want her advice right now and he didn't want to look at her either. He kept walking towards his car, "I know you mean well but go inside and enjoy your dinner niña." Her stubbornness said no, "Jake sometimes you just have to let them win." He turned around and looked her up and down, "when you have everything handed to you its easy to say that type of shit. I have blood on my hands and people who don't have anyone looking out for them except for me and my men. Save your wise guy impression for the next dumbass." He barely finished his sentence before she smacked him. He didn't say anything but the look on his face said it all.

She watched as he took off, not sure and with no real care if she would ever see him again.

#oscar issac x reader #oscar issac #mob!au #jake lockely x reader #jake lockley #oscar isaac

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bookishbea · 4 years

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Black Friday Reaction

Okay so I’ll be live tweeting Black Friday but none of it will have any sense to it but it’ll just be my reactions

1. The Paul thing is really bothering me

2. I really love the mention of the other characters

3. If Jane is mention is the story about the mom mentioned some more

4. Is the delivery man ted (cause he’s also a sleazeball

5. It’s weird seeing Cory not play a pure bean

6. I love California MIA

7. The little sister (Im sorry I’m bad at names) I self project as autistic and she something else idk

8. Did anyone else noticed Robert’s Australian accent come out?

9. Like I said this is out of order so yeah but I personally think the second song in the show was very shocking as I’m not used to very serious starkid songs

10. When Robert gestures smoking i think its lowkey a refrence to the smoke club

11. I have a crush on lex

12. I love Lauren’s charecter so much

13. I love the name linda becuase it could be like a karen without using that name

14. Not to get poltical but i choose to belive they made an antivax joke

15. Also the marvel nerd in me loves the name becky barnes

16. I know its probaly not on purpose but joeys charecters costume in line looks like the homeless guy’s one

17. Jaimey is great as always

18. The conversation is so cringe i love it

19. I kinda hope torture porn is a fanfic refrence (i know most people would want me to say spies are forever but nope)

20. I love Lauren but shouldnt her accent be included when she sings

21. I love Jeff’s reaction

22. I may get some hate for this but what was bothering me in tgwdlm and i notice in starkid is lack of fan comments in the captions

23. As a theatre fan i love the toy zone song (i am not sure if thats the right name) espcially the do wop becuase it reminds me of older musicals

24. Also since i watched tgwdlm and black friday a day apart its weird to come from songs happening because they are infected to songs happening cause its a musical

25. i love the love the line we are not relaibly to anyone who dies becuase they clearly show in the trailer that someone will die (this is not a spoiler if you watch the trailer for Black Friday)

26. I love Corey but when he dances i notice a bulge (i am not a perv he makes it very obvious)

27. So i rewinded it to make sure i wanst going crazy and realized something as lex says the pepper spray line. She would be good as janis ian

28. I love the touch money part its so cute even if its not supposed to be

29. Jaime plays a perv really well

30. I love Jon’s charecter its hilarious

31. Also i love jon and lauren interactions so it was cool seeing them together not as paul and emma

32. I love seeing more of Jon because although hes reaally good at playing paul paul doesnt have any flavor and its cool seeing jon do something diffrent

33. Jeff’s fuck you

34. Okay I was right it was the homeless guy and i bet the money is paul’s money

35. And this is not a sterotpye as i am jewish myself but i bet Laurens charecter is jewish

36. Its sad that the price thing is true

37. So i am a theatre fan and do not watch got but that music kinda reminds me of got

38. Cant tell if jeff’s charecter is gay and a perv or just a perv (i realzie this could be mmisinterpreted as homophobic i just mean to say that jamie’s charecter just seems like a full out perv where as i cant tell with jeff’s)

39. Obviously you shouldnt be that insane but i do like the lines about how you are in charge of life and dont care about what others think. its goood life advice

39. Looks like Paul’s boss got his wish

40. They are all idiots for holding up the doll when everyone wants to get it

41. Corey’s charecter is like shit, money isnt that imporant

42. Becky why are you a part of this you have moral high ground (yes i am ignorning the fact that cast usually join in dance numbers even if their charecter isnt a part of it)

43. Shouldnt tom get ptsd (see above)

44. Lex you already have one (see above)

45. So i may be overthinking things but how curt says never should settle is in the tune of spies are forever

46. Is it just me or did anyone else notice when the security guard comes in the tune of show me your hands comes in

47. I dont know why but i do love soft bullies because hes like hey im punching you but only for the kid

48. Some may say its schizo or something hannah has but its anxiery or something from how shes expressing it

49. I feel like hannah has a superpower and can tell whats happening

50. Maybe webby is actually wiggly

51. Baby (both hannah and robert)

52. Please tell me my babies not dead

53. Jon’s eee is adorable and silly

54. Wait hes alive

55. Wait no hes dead, im sad liek starkid is supposed to be fun and happy this is the darkest star kid yet. Even oregon deaths were silly

56. I love starkid but this is making me anxious i cant tell if its good anxious or bad anxious

57. Also i relate to the black and white thing not fully but liek whenever i dont feel well sometimes my brain is overstimulating but only in my head its very hard to explain

58. Also i think sometimes kids on the spectrum and im not an expert but i do have it kind of make a friend in their head and i do that too sometimes just to give me advice

59. Also i hope they dont get rid of the black and white as sometimes people go more crazy without the figurative voice in their head

60. Like i said this is going to be random order so i like that emma adopted paul;s Okay and no im not making a tfios refrence

61. Poor Tim

62. Poor becky but even less

63. i thought they were supposed to be mad at g-d but in this and tgwdlm they like g-d

64. I cant tell the other pins on joey’s jacket but the first two i notice are mr wiggly and paul

65. I love Lauren’s acting you can see the very sublte sadness in her

66. Lauren and Joey together ahhhh

67. I know its probaly not a big deal but they should give a seziure warning before the tv scene

68. Did they reuse curts spies are forever outfit

69. Really starkid the obama refrence seriously, i cant tell if im mad or laughing

70. How did Bob get one

71. I do realize they are talking irl but i cant help but wonder if the nazis were a spies are forever refrence

72. Does wiggly have a special power or something

73. I think its similar to the metero the closer you are the more power it has over you

74. The starkid special effects we all know and love

75. Also is that mcnamara

76. Also maybe shooting it (the doll) does the same thing that shooting the affceted does. Give them no power

77. I cant tell what the music reminds me of exactly but the tune does kinda refrence a diffrent star kid song

78. Jeff looks so proud of himself for the peeps line

79. I love the purposeful i presume reuse of lines

80. Is peip like men in black

81. Also hatchetfield kind of reminds me of night vale

82. Is the black and white like the upside down?

83. I wonder if the point was purposeful since someone was filming or just choreographed

84. Yes Jon Singing!!!!!

85. I love the act two opener

86. Did his parents really name him christmas?!?

87. Oh hes literally related to santa

88. I love lauren and joey as eleves

89. Noel another christmas name

90. Isnt the little dance move like a genie move or something

91. Its so cute that she insitincitvely went to their seats

92. Also carving is goals

93. Even though its a penis its still goals

94. I know what you are, say it, santa clause

95. Tom dont yell at your girl

96. Poor Tom

97. But also dont make this about you

98. They probaly werent the head of the school since they were nice, i am sorry but thats true

99. Yass girl fight his ass

100. Also the theatre kid in me is picturing all that jazz

101. he ran into my knife he ran into my knife ten times

102. Yes Becky’s husband (i forget the name sue me) is bad but i feel like becky is more sinister then we realize

103. Becky’s line even if it isnt meant to be is so funny

104. The girl who plays Becky could play Barbara

105. I love how Joey and Lauren look into the camera

106. Jamie saying santa awww such a pure bean

107. The person in the wiggly onsie is goals

108. Matrix glasses for the win

109. Is wilbur a refrence to Charelots Web?

110. Its a cult a cult of wiggly

111. I feel like Sherman young is around 30-40

112. I love how its mommy to sound less pervy

113. Oh wait never mind Linda is mom

114. Shit thats fucked up they killed him

115. I am right a jew no non jew says mensch

116. To quote jared klienman kinky (shoe kiss scene)

117. Also i love this song the adore song

118. Why does them picking up Lauren give me Draco vibes

119. Wait he isnt dead?? im so confused

120. Wait he is dead???

121. Also ethan is creepy now

122. But Roberts expressions are goals

123. Robert your proffesor hidgens is showing

124. What the how does he know her name

125. Savage Wiggly

126. Wiggly is more funny than scary

127. But my poor baby dont be scared

128. What the fuck tom

129. Also poor baby number two

130. At first you think becky is made about him hurting a child but no its about the doll

131. What the fuck Becky

132. Also I wonder if thats the same serum that Hidgens used

133. Tom yelling at the audince is hilarious

134. Also Becky singing is giving me little shop vibes

135. Becky are you drunk or something you so stupid

136. But yayy my baby doesnt get hurt

137. More starkid special effects

138. Also the lighting nod to tgwdlm

139. Also why did they take my baby (see i told you random)

140. So the perv is wiggly

141. Also if he can appear in regular formation on earth why does he need to be the doll

142. Oh wait never mind he explains it

143. Joey talking to the audience and making them hold the apple is goals

144. I love Joey’s song

145. MIA = Missing in Action = Made in America

146. Wait im wrong Joey cant be Wiggly unless he has super powers he cant be in two places at once

147. I know they dont mean sex but still wtf

148. Lauren looks so done i cant

149. Seziure warning after mr presidnet leaves the black and white

150. Unless it was purposeful they should have hidden the dolls better backstage

151. Wait didnt hannah say something about two doors earlier?

152. Seriously Sherman ponies

153. I love the going back line

154. My poor baby lex

155. No Lex dont die not you too

156. Haha throwback to tgwdlm

157. Yes baby you got the gun

158. Also die perv die

159. Eagle screeching is goals

160. Yes lex use that logic

161. Also it makes sense only the adults can be brainwashed

162. There were only adults no children, scary (not sarcastic i promise)

163. Seriously starkid Fortnight

164. Thats why you should never fully grow up

165. Woah what Lex says is deep

166. Yessss Tom

167. Wait Tom dont hold the gun

168. Wait is Charolette alive or just a reuse of costume, if so why would they have jaimie wear it

169. No dont take her magic hat

170. Haha stupid hats cant be magic only dolls obviously

171. Does lauren say something like fucking knife in another show too?

172. Lauren screaming gives me my father will hear about this vibes

173. Also give my baby her hat back

174. Yass Lauren get it girl (i do realize shes playing the villian but still)

175. Yass Robert get it

176. Even though shes a viilain i dont like seeing Lauren get killed

177. But also how did they get the bullet wound on her so quick im impressed

178. Haha the way Gary stops everything to talk to gerald is goals

179. Like hes like oh shit money

180. And then hes like oh wait i have to pretend to care

181. I love how exagerated their dying is

182. Thats an impressive quick change

183. Yess Emma Hidgens

184. But also no hell fuck up again

185. Also Paul interupting is goals

186. Haha hannah you go girl

187. First off I love the song

188. Song off Hannah’s voice

189. Is paul scared normal or because of the hive

190. Wait all the tgwdlm charecters are back like nothing happened im confused

191. Haha the Hatchfield band is back

#black friday #starkid #tickle me wiggly #the guy who didn't like musicals

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ruffiorocks · 5 years

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Long Post on How Lena being ‘evil’ after the reveal would be a disservice to her entire character arc.

Extract from an interview with Jon Cyer:

"If Lex does end up revealing the truth about Supergirl to Lena, it could have devastating impact. Kara herself attempted to reveal the truth to Lena but stopped as it became clear that the revelation would be extremely damaging to Lena after all of the lies and manipulations she's endured thanks to Lex. It's the kind of damage that would definitely fall under the label of "evil" and could even set up a major conflict for Supergirl next season."

What even is this statement? The last part doesn't even make sense:

"It's the kind of damage that would definitely fall under the label of "evil" and could even set up a major conflict for Supergirl next season."

Damage isnt evil, damage is just damage. It's not like you can have good damage. So Lena learning Kara is Supergirl would inflict damage and then she falls under the label of 'evil'? Completely destroying her as a character. This just says that Lena will immediately become evil (such a strong word) as soon as she learns Kara is Supergirl.

I'm sorry ... But what the actual f**k? So they're just going to go down the same road that Game of Thrones went with Dany in the last episode?

"I'm here to save people, not burn them"

5 mins later

"f**k you all I'm pissed off and I'm going to kill every man, woman and child because I can".

Supergirl writers like to borrow heavily from from Smallville. Well the Lex Luthor of Smallville wasnt immediately evil. Lex was actually a good guy at the start, he was a play boy but he wasnt really so bad. He did however have some moral grey areas. Lex was best friends with Clark, but from day one he was curious about how he managed to survive going off the bridge and the damage done to his car and no damage done to Clark. But Lex didnt immediately go after Clark, he genuinely loved and cared about him almost like a brother. It was Clark that kept going out of his way to keep lying to an overly curious Lex who gave him more than one opportunity to come clean to him. Lex was driven crazy because he knew there was something up with Clark but Clark kept acting like Lex was delusional. Lex was used and abused by his father who favored Clark from the moment he met him. But Lex did a lot of good things in the earlier series, he was ultimately always put down due to his name though. Visions of him in a white suit with blood rain just meant that no matter what Lex did his destiny was to be bad and thats how he would then be treated which ironically is what drove those visions to come true.

So are they just going to recycle this with Lena? The only differences being that Lena hasnt done any evil things and she hasnt been trying to expose Kara because she's oblivious?

Lena has literally done NOTHING but help Supergirl, National City and help save the world several times since she first appeared. Lena isn't perfect, she has a dark side when pushed to her limit, she went to shoot Edge because he was poisoning children. She even told Kara she went and did this. It wasn't a secret.

Lena is pro gun? Doesn't make her evil, it's not like people aren't trying to kill her every 5 minutes and soldier or not Alex is way to gun happy. Alex has also basically been an alcoholic who is in charge of firearms since she was first introduced.

Lena killed Adam? Lena made a mistake, one that is haunting her. She didn't hold a gun to Adams head and pull the trigger cackling like a maniac. I’ve said it once and ill say it again, if Lena is guilty of ‘murdering’ Adam then Jonn is 100% guilty of murdering Manchester Black, a man he had already disarmed and killed purely because Manchester taunted him and and Jonn got pissed off. Even Kara looked shocked when she asked where Manchester was, but then immediately she was fine with it and was like ‘dont worry, one murder doesn't mean you cant be a man of peace’.

The biggest problem with Lena ‘turning evil’ after learning Kara is Supergirl is that that would would imply that Lena being a good person has been entirely dependent on her relationships with both Kara and Supergirl! What the hell? I mean i love Kara but she isnt a freaking God!! Lena’s personality has never been dependent on anyone but herself. Lena was a good person long before she ever set eyes on Kara or Supergirl. Lena was the one that dropped Lex in it remember? Why the hell would they reduce Lena from a complex character to a one dimensional character whose heroic and good personality was entirely dependent on her relationship with Kara/Supergirl?

That is exactly what they did to Kara in season 3, she stopped being ‘Kara Danvers’ the moment Mon El left because even though she had a life, job, a human family and friends and was Kara Danvers long before he showed up she suddenly couldn't be that person anymore because her boyfriend wasn't around? Her entire character was reduced to her being dependent solely on him? That’s not Mon El hate by the way, its hate for the writers.

It would be ridiculous for Lena to instantly forgive Kara for lying her to. To be honest i would be more disappointed in Lena if she was absolutely OK with all of this rather than letting Kara know she’s royally f**ked up! Kara its true doesn't owe her identity to anyone, God even Lena probably would have questioned her if she had instantly revealed herself to her. But the problem is that Kara knows she can trust Lena, she has known this for years. Kara has also revealed her secret to people she has known for less time than she has known Lena and to people she barely knows at all (Nia). Yes she told Nia out of solidarity but Kara has had way more solidarity moments with Lena than she had with Nia. Plus Kara didn't really know Nia at all, Nia could have been playing her the whole time. Lena on the other hand is her best friend and has helped save the world, worked with the DEO and saved Supergirls life and ass many times over.

Kara let the secret go on for far to long, in addition she told other people. Kara used the excuse that it was to keep Lena safe because her enemies would go after Lena. But that is just crap because Lena already has her own enemies, she deals with those enemies. Plus Kara never seemed to care that her enemies could have gone after Winn, James, Nia etc. It was a decent excuse in the beginning but then it became invalid the longer its gone on. Lena knowing Kara is supergirl would probably make her much safer in retrospect, Lena could have just called Kara or been given a fancy watch like a certain someone. The worst part though is that Kara has known since season 2 that Lillian Luthor knows who she is, she also knows that Lex Luthor knows who she is and Lena could have been told by them at any point. Lillian has had years to tell her and could of done. Kara has sat back and just hoped the Luthors wont out her? That is probably the worst story line Kara has EVER had! Kara may not want to hurt Lena with the truth but it would hurt way more coming form Lex!! Kara will reep what she sows here.

On top of this Kara hasnt just been pretending to be two different people to Lena, she has been acting like Jekell and Hyde. Lena and Supergirl have come to an understanding over the whole Reign/Kryptonite issue, but Lena only thinks she's come to an understanding with Supergirl. Lena doesnt know that it was actually her best friend treating her like garbage and with hostility the whole time, then coming back to her as Kara and being all besties again. THAT RIGHT THERE is where the betrayal lies. It isnt that Kara kept being Supergirl a secret from her, its that Kara betrayed her trust as Supergirl and was horrible to her. Lena had Kryptonite purely to help try and save Sam, but Supergirl immediately took it all personally not really giving a second thought to Sam at all. She just assumed that Lena was out to get her and then she started to try and pull rank on Lena, but Supergirl was left gob smacked because low and behold Lena Luthor wasn't beholden to the Girl of Steel like Supergirl expected her to be. Supergirl was given a harsh lesson in where she actually stands in the authority department.

To make it even worse Supergirl enlisted Lena’s then boyfriend to betray her trust and break into her company to spy on her to check she wasnt a liar. James actually does this without to much hesitation, he even enlists Winn’s help. That right there is four betrayals against Lena, where she only assumes it was the one. Lena forgave James, (i dont know why, he still broke into L Corp, he only grew a conscience at the very last second) and holds Supergirl responsible. Lena only thinks it was Supergirl who used her boyfriend against her. Lena will soon find out however that it wasnt just Supergirl, it was her best friend, her boyfriend and even Winn her other friend who all betrayed her. Lena is going to learn that all of the above was actually her the work of her best friend the entire time, then that best friend would come back to her and listen to her mention these betrayals.

Back to James, James had absolutely no reason to throw Supergirl under the bus. He just ‘had to be honest with Lena’ ? How about you dont break into her personal property and betray her trust in the first place? James knew for a fact that Supergirl and Lena were having a beef, he knew full well that if Lena knew what Supergirl had asked him to do she would be even more hurt and angry at Supergirl but he did it anyway. This is exactly what happened because Lena told Kara that Supergirl had used the people she cares about against her and she can never trust her again. At least Kara had the good sense to look guilty. But the other side to this is that once Lena finds out that James knew it was actually ‘Kara’ that betrayed her she will be even more hurt. She will have been doubly betrayed by both Kara and James!

Kara:

1. Treated her crap as Supergirl

2. Enlisted Lena’s boyfriend to betray her

James:

1. Actually did break into L Corp betraying Lena, for some bizarre reason was forgiven. Then he threw Supergirl under the bus to gain Lena’s trust without a thought to the lasting damage it would have.

2. James actually knew the whole time it was Kara being an ass to Lena and it was Kara who was asking James to betray Lena. James then put the last nail in the coffin for Supergirl and Lena’s friendship, but at the same time allowed Lena to continue believing that Kara wasn't the one that betrayed her. James allowed Lena to employ/confide in and be around the very person she declared she could no longer trust. James even enlisted Winn to help betray Lena, Winn being one of Lena’s friends.

If Kara suffers in the aftermath, (which she will) then i want James to suffer the consequences of that betrayal as well. To those that would say ‘Lena is a liar and keeps secrets’ well Lena’s secrets have never directly had anything to do with the Superfriends, she doesn't keep them to hurt anyone, or tell them to hurt anyone. Lena doesn't have to tell Supergirl everything she is doing because Supergirl isnt her boss, she didn't have to tell James everything but she did actually reveal a lot to him. Lena actually told everyone about her super humans idea but they all dismissed it immediately, Lena doesn't have to stop though because some people dont approve.

So to have Lena go bad after spending all of the time fighting Lex and Lillian, saving the alien population from genocide, saving the city from Daxamites, saving Supergirls life more than once, coming to work with the DEO even when she has beef with Supergirl, doing her best to try and help save Reign, manufacturing Harun El to make sure that Argo City never dies, begging Supergirl to let her die so she can save the people from the chemical on that plane, agreeing to marry Mon El to save a children's hospital, buying Cat Co to keep the free press free? Suddenly all that is erased because she is lied to by her best friend? NO! If lies and deceit were enough to send Lena over the edge it would have already happened, she can survive multiple betrayals and assassination attempts from her family, the people of National City making her a pariah, Rhea betraying her, Alana betraying her, Eve betraying her? Jack's death? But the icing on the cake that makes her snap is Kara betraying her? NO! What a disservice to Lena as a character! It would also cancel out the conversations she had with Sam when she was telling her she knew she was a good person no matter what and all the conversations she’s recently had with Brainy about having emotions.

Plus to make Lena, who has fought the Luthors at every turn to suddenly snap and say ‘f**k it im going to complete Lex’s life work’ is insanity.

Ultimately, the social lesson of the day here is if your family is s**t then you are s**t. No kids dont bother trying to be good people, you are lost causes. We dont care that you became a paramedic, or a fire fighter, or a soldier, or a surgeon or anything. You ARE crap and you will always be crap! The lesson is ‘never try’. Everyone else on this show has had trauma and betrayal in their lives but they still get to be heroes? Jonn? Alex? Kara? Winn? All had some trauma or family issues but nope they arent allowed to be bad guys. If having a bad family makes you bad then Alex should be because of her dad, Winn should be because of his dad and Kara absolutely should be because of her parents and her aunt and uncle.

The only thing that would make sense after the reveal is Lena having nothing at all to do with Kara, probably selling Cat Co and cutting pretty much every one of the Superfriends from her life. Where would they go from there with her? Well Lena has no reason to turn her attentions to hurting them or the people of National City. She doesn't stop being who she is due to betrayal. So maybe Lena finds a way to be a hero on her own refusing to help Supergirl anymore. I still 100% believe though that if Kara was hurt Lena would come and help no matter what, because that has always been who she is and her good nature and sanity has NEVER been dependent on Kara. Kara is not the centre of everyone universe.

#supergirl #lena luthor #kara x lena #kara danvers #anti guardiancorp #anti james olsen #jonn jonzz #alex danvers #nia nal #winn shott #samantha arias #lex luthor #lillian luthor #eve teschmacher #eve tessmacher

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blackcrawford · 5 years

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Why Lena Luthor Matters (Even When Others Actions Prove Otherwise)

*taps mic* is this thing on?

Last night during the season finale of Supergirl (A show I was diametrically opposed to when it first started (feminist for feminist sake is almost worse than pandering to people of color. stop it. And to be honest, it ain’t have that many black people in it *Shrugs*), to becoming my favorite show in the Arrowverse.

for one reason actually. Lena Luthor. I watched the 2nd season, and immediately became attached to her.

It’s not just because of Katie Mcgrath. (huge part of it. I mean come on, shes beautiful incarnate and is as smart as the day is long)

Lena is the most relatable person on the show for reasons amplified last night.

*Spoiler ahead*

The big reveal happened. But in a way that you can expect for a Luthor. It was shot at her. Because thats whats done to Lena. It shot darts at her insecurites, her crippling lack of self worth and her ability to trust.

People who have been one half of an abusive relationship, knew all too well how Lena felt and thats why it hurt so much to watch.

I woke up this morning thinking of it.

When you are part of a cycle of abuse, whether at the hands of family or a spouse or a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Everything you think you know about yourself, you question every single day. The things you were told, you question. Even the good things.

Now Kara was not abusive. (Lex was definitely abusive. Emotionally, psychologically and physically sometimes. Its a comic book show yes, but he was definitely an abuser)

But Kara was part of that cycle of self doubt and that is just as bad. Because she knew how much it would hurt, and she still said nothing. They told each other everything. Lena gave up so much about herself. About her mother and brother. Her adoption, her loneliness, the torment she faced at the hands of Lex and Kara sat there with a stupid look on her face and said nothing while still calling Lena her best friend.

Everyone in that group betrayed Lena. James is almost as guilty as Kara to be honest.

(That whole relationship was predicated on dishonesty and foolishness anyways. Forced like a penny in a nostril. James is quite possibly the worst character ever and I know they’re going to keep him around, cause Mechad is an itch in the middle of your back and he loves the paycheck and his inflated sense of self worth. I would say way worse, but I’m black and he’s a black king and I won’t give the racist fangirls any leeway to spread their ignorance around)

ANYWAYS!

We have all felt like that. Where we have felt left out and isolated by people we loved and THOUGHT loved us.

And thats why Lena is rightFULLY pissed because here her best friend couldn’t let her know in the three years that they’ve known each other that she was Supergirl. Including that time when they were BEEFING. So Kara was being fake in her face, while also being Supergirl.

(Excuse me, while the hood comes out but I’d smack the fire outta Kara with a Kryptonite glove if I was Lena, but I digress)

While her worst enemy, with his dying breath told her the truth.

(Lex was her biggest speed bump in all of her accomplishments and personal growth and development, ergo worst enemy)

Thats all Lena is going to think about when she thinks of that moment. Not that he did it out of spite, but that he actually did what Kara couldn’t.

tell her the truth.

Now she’s going to rethink every moment they had. Every smile they shared. Every meal they shared. Every time Kara ran away. A lot of those times could’ve been her running away to actually work on a story, but anger and sadness are BLINDING.

All of Lena’s happiness for the past three years was built on a throne of lies and deception. She had no family with no Kara. Now she has one, and Kara’s dishonesty, is snatching her family away again.

“Kara kept it a secret to protect her”

Lena disarmed, dismantled and killed the most wanted man (an abusive brother she grew up with who had crippled her self worth and self esteem) in the universe with a gun and her brains.

Lena didn’t need Kara to protect her.

Lena is the strongest person on that show.

Lena needed Kara to reassure her.

And Kara failed.

How long is Lena supposed to act cool, until she’s allowed to snap. I wanna know.

I don’t know what the next season will bring, but probably its going to be angst and anxiety for Lena.

#supergirl #the reveal #lena luthor #katie mcgrath

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ibraddersday-blog · 5 years

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20 years so far.

Hi, my name is Bradley Day. Never received a middle name, guess my parents were too lazy. It is currently 12:53pm as I write this on Friday 16th August of 2019, and to be honest I have no idea what I'm doing. I'm about to explain what I have experienced over the past 20 years frankly because, I know 2 people my age who are like me, the rest are so uptight about who they think they are on their online personas and social media reputations. so I want to find more like me.

in this post im giving you real, the embarrassing, humiliating, funny but stupid truth about my life. seems like thats the only thing that you can't really find anymore... honesty.

I was born in basildon hospital in Essex on the 10th of November 1998, my mother is Heidi Day, my father being James Day (actual name is Jimmy but we stick to James) I have a older sister called Rebecca Day. apparently I was born with a skin condition were I didn't get enough vitamins which means I was born yellow, a little English asian baby as you will. had to be sat next to a window to get natural vitamins from the sun. but that was all cleared up as a baby and I dont remember it so not important.

as far as I remember we were a happy family, I was a little shit for my parents but hey I didn't ask to be born. I've never said this but im very thankful for my parents, as a family we went through a few hardships and money never came easy, and no matter what my mum and dad always went out to work and make an honest living to keep a roof over my head and food on the table, people say thats a luxury and may berate us saying thats not hard, but the hard truth is, if you had to worry about where your next meal came from as a kid, your parents didn't work hard enough, and ill be dammed if I let my kids starve a day just because I go lazy for a day.

but out of this happy hardworking family it all changed when I was 4-5, my mum and dad divorced, my dad left and it was me, mum and becky in one house, my dad always tried his best to make it work for him and us. we got by it was just a couple who fell out of love, it's always bummed me out but thats life, move on.

Thats when I met Lindsey who is now a second mother to me, I made her life hell for a lot of years and so did my sister, Linds if you ever read this im sorry, im sorry for never being the kid you wanted because you couldn't have children and wanted to take on me and becky so you could feel loved as a mother, im sorry I tested your patience every chance I got, im sorry you felt you had to buy me a brand to xbox when the disk tray on mine broke (but thank you cose it was an awesome thing to do) but for most of all, im sorry for never having the guts to admit to you in person how much you really mean to me or impacted my life, you gave me chance after chance at your work and im sorry for letting you down. now for what im thankful for. thank you for kicking me up the ass to do my homework, thank you for putting plasters all over me when I've hurt myself doing something else stupid, thank you for coming with me to the hospital when I got run over just down the road and following matt down countless alleys, thank you for letting my friends come over whenever they wanted as a place to hang out and chill and chat, thank you for not telling mum that there was a grinder in my room when I went back to living at mums, but for most of all, thank you being full of advice, thank you for the honesty you poses wether it hurt or not you were always honest with me, I hope one day I can repay you for all the things you have done for me over the 15\16 years of knowing you, I love you very much.

school... ugh, primary okay, secondary Jesus Christ what a shit show, now im not stupid but im not smart, education is not my path Im a natural worker and always have been, don’t do suits and smiles I do hi viz clothing and “oh fuck you slag’ spent the better part of it arguing with teachers and trying to be someone im not just to fit in. I had my fair share of bullying but you take it like a man and thats it but back then I thought my world had been crushed, ridiculous I know, kids if you’re being bullied now it may not seem it but it really dont fucking matter, its school thats how it is if you dont like learn from home. now I got pretty bad at one point and made a video and put it online, about how im being bullied and how pissed and upset it Made me and so on, well the school found out and I was forced to remove it, should of just told them too fuck off but it was just hassle that I couldn't be arsed with. year 11 soon flies around and boom left with nothing... great, now college level 1 sport how fucking normal right. well sussed level 1 dropped level 2.

now work. for the next 2 years I dosed about and went through 8 jobs... yes thats right fucking eight until one came by and that is TGIS at lakeside retail park, now it was a shit job but it taught me a lot, it taught me team work, pace, the importance of showing up for shifts, how vital I am as a cog in that machine, it taught me how punctuality means everything, I mean I got employee of the month in my first month working there for god sake I pushed hard and getting a reward like that it really hit home, as I never really got anything like that before, I got home and cried in bed as I was so happy for that for once in my life someones recognised me for me and how hard I work, it still gets to me writing this, it means a lot to someone like me. I've since left there for a better job and found one at a container shipping company driving cranes, and I gotta say I think this Is the place I’ll make a career out of, its great pay, get great hours and there are some great guys there who I've grown to become friends with. after countless let downs in my life I’m happy to say I've found somewhere I belong and love. the people I wanna say thank you for are Lex A and Jack R, I love you boys you really pulled me through at TGIS, even though we argued a lot I still value you two a lot.

now for my life outside of work. I have a few friends being Michael, jack, James and josh. these are the people who are like me, hard working and are making a name for themselves with the help of no-one else. we have all faced great hardships in life and really push to get what we want. but with my friends that want is wanting to get a shitty old RWD and drift it into walls for a laugh, it is pretty funny to be honest. honestly I can say these boys are like family to me they mean more to me than they know and id be there for them in a second if they need me. jack is my longest friend though, we've been friends for 15 years, we met in year 1 in primary school and never stopped since, I would go Into details but its now 1:30am and im tired.

relationships... I can't do them. dont get me wrong I love the idea of them and would love to be in one but I simply can't do it, I can't deal with other peoples shit as well as my own as I've always dealt with mine on my own not needing someone else, and girls are weird about that shit, all emotional and shit, grow up and move on life is tough if you dont like it theres many ways out, I dont do sorrow or sympathy. but marriage scares me, it freaks me out im not even kidding, the idea of being forced by law to be in a relationship with someone and if the love dies they can take all your shit fucking scares me! who wouldn't be frightened by that! maybe one day ill get over it and take a leap of faith with someone I love but why knows ay.

and for now right this very second. im happy with who I am, I have nice car, a good job, im single but happily, its easier and less stressful, the key to happiness is a stress free life after all. yeah I may be bit tubby and not in great shape, but im happy with myself and who I see in the mirror, because I know im going to be okay, ill work through my problems that happen in my life, and in the end ill know ill always be okay.

to whoever is reading this. just know life is easy, the key to happiness is being okay with who you are. yeah theres always improvements that could be made, but if you got a roof over your head, working water and food on the table, you’re doing pretty good in life. just picture life as an English country lane, for the most part its gonna be rocky and bumpy with loads of big potholes but theres always the parts where the road is smooth and freshly done, just gotta keep hanging on to those moments before your turning is up on to the straight and narrow bud, keep pushing and working hard boys and girls, like I was always told “stop being a pussy and get what you want”

probably be my only ever post here so yeah, maybe someone will read it, who knows!

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ao3-hipster-fangirl-trash · 6 years

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I don’t belong here (I)

Summary: taking place during the events of The Avengers, Lex is Tony Starks adoptive daughter, who seems to have a knack for technology and, for some odd reason, mythology, however when one of the myths she loves so much comes to life, she can’t help but feel she knows him from a life before Tony Stark

aka: Tony and Steve pine whilst a 12 year old tries to have a conversation with an intergalactic criminal

part 1 / part 2

Lex was put up for adoption when she was 5.

It wasn’t because her family didn’t love her, they truly did, it was because they couldn’t be sure she was safe anymore. A child that turns blue when afraid is extremely suspicious to say the least, but where she had come from? Even more so.

She remembered how her father had cried, tears tracking though the grime coating his face. She remembered how he had held to her so tightly, his fists bunching her dress and sniffing into her shoulder. She remembered his pleas, his words, just, him.

She had been crying too. Of course, she wasn’t sure if it was because she knew what was happening, or because of what had just happened, but either way, she was crying.

They had been standing on the doorstep of an orphanage, or a foster home, or some place where orphans went. It was late and no-one was on the streets, everyone sleeping in their beds, cuddled up to someone or something. But they were awake, on the steps of a home that wasn’t hers.

She’d forgotten what he called her.

It was something beautiful, something lovely. Her original name before he had left her alone. She had told one of the boys in the home, but even he didn’t remember any more.

He had said her name, then; I must leave. Be good, be kind, be smart, be safe.

Then he had gone.

She had knocked on the door, greeted by a woman in a nightgown, crying to her about how she had lost her Papa, and how she was alone, and the woman had taken her in and helped her look. But, as suspected, they had found no-one.

Of course she had made friends whilst she was there, but only one she kept in contact with, and thats who she was talking to right now, in the Stark tower, 4 years after the Afghanistan incident and 7 years after being left.

Both of them had progressed in school exponentially, becoming the highest in their grades in the sciences and mathematics, each of them describes as ‘star students’ and both of them continuously bored by the curriculum. At that current moment, they were talking about their English teacher, Mr Burney, who had assigned them yet another book to read, and yet again it was the most boring thing that the two of them had ever had the displeasure of laying their eyes on.

“I mean, who decides to make a shakespearian drama with entire chapters of bad grammar AND then makes sure that it has no feasible end, and on top of that add political subtext which makes no sense whatsoever?”

Peter sighed on the other side of the line at the end of the rant, clearly still frustrated by the entire situation.

“Clearly someone who thinks they can write?” Lex chucked, moving around her room, kicking away her beanbag which was laid across her floor, somewhat pathetically.

“Maybe if we go to sleep, tomorrow we won’t remember the plot?”

Lex gave a little laugh, shaking her head slightly.

“Maybe.”

She heard thrusters firing near the balcony, before a loud metallic clang as Tony landed, back from his last ‘science mission.’

Lex jumped towards the door, phone still in hand, rushing towards the living room.

“Peteigottagotony’sbacktalktoyousoon!!” She heard him chuckle on the other side of the line and say a quick ‘bye’ before hearing a continuous beep, singling that he had hung up.

She barrelled into the living room and threw herself towards Tony, having him barely catch her and hoist her into his arms, after all, she was 12, in motion and tall for her age, and he wasn't Captain America.

“Heeeyyyy kiddo, did ya miss me?” She gave him a toothy grin in reply before giving him a gentle pat on the cheek.

“Tony you were gone an hour.” She replied, before jumping down and going towards Pepper, who was currently fussing over the stats of the tower’s energy.

The blueprints were rising from their sheets, broad glowing shapes representing the very structure where they stood, every little detail counted for, from the water pipes to the odd thermostat wiring in Lex’s room (too cold and she went a little… well… blue).

Lex brought her hands towards the large frame of the building and passed her hand through it, waving it back and forth in a bored and repetitive motion.

“Peppeeeeeeerrrrrr?” Pepper hummed in response before she looked down from her work to see Lex staring up at her, eyes wide.

“Pepper can we get takeaway? Like Wendy’s or something, cause Tony had a nice burger with onion rings last time and I want a burger and onion rings.”

She gave a slight smile from the corner of her mouth, looking back towards her work.

“I would say ask Tony but I know he's definitely going to say yes to takeaway.”

“Did someone say takeaway?”

Tony had reached the table where the two girls were stood, surveying his good work.

He walked around Pepper, admiring the work he had done. Whilst watching the energy levels stabilise he felt himself fill with an almost self serving pride which only Tony Stark would be able to recognise. Of course he was proud. He had just made his entire building go green, he had a lot to be proud about. Of course, the best part was when he got to explain it to Lex, and how her eyes went wide and her mouth hung open, clearly enamoured by the logistics of the devices he made. Whilst she wasn’t biologically his kid, he could see himself in her a little more every day.

At that particular moment she was clinging onto Peppers arm, giving her Tony’s signature puppy dog face, ‘cept she could pull it off 1000 times better than he could, hell if it were her that had ended up in that cave, they would have let her out within a day, begging for her to forgive them.

“Pops, can we get takeaway?” Good god he couldn’t ever say no to that face.

“Fine-“

“Yesss.”

He watched her give a little fist pump in victory, ever so slight but still. He knew she had him wrapped around her little finger, the only problem was that she knew it. Of course, she didn't let him spoil her, she knew her limits and didn’t like to test em.

There was a ding behind them where the elevator settled in its place drawing everyone to look at the double doors as they opened.

“Wow that was quick.” Tony gave a snicker at Lex’s little quip, before turning back to the doors to see Phil Coulson striding out in a brisk manner, a file in hand, with a blank face, completely unaware of the previous comment.

“Cole!” Lex ran towards the man, only to have him hoist her up on his hip, looking at her in an amused manner.

“Oh god you’re getting big, what are you now, 26? 27 maybe?” Lex laughed and slid down before heading to the couch and plopping herself down, turning on the tv as a ‘faux distraction,’ on low enough that she could hear the conversation.

Tony, of course, knew this, but indulged her curiosity by saying nothing of it.

“We got a little problem Stark,” Coulson sighed, shifting the files of paper in his grasp, “An interstellar problem.”

“Sounds like a big problem.” It obviously earnt him a swift kick to the ankles by Pepper because a moment later Lex hears an exasperated ‘ow’.

“It is, what do you know of Loki?” Lex’s ears perked up, instantly invested within the situation. She had heard that name before in fact her biological father was adamant that she learnt about him, making sure to distinguish the truth from lies. When she would ask how he knew, he would look at her with a mischievous glint in his eyes, saying ‘He’s a close friend of mine.”

Her train of thought was interrupted by Tony replying.

“A little, kiddo over here’s pretty interested in that sort of stuff, aren’t you kid?” It was her cue to join in.

“Yup, a so called ‘trickster god’ whom was well known as a Jotun within the Asgardian household, he was often used for diplomacies and political missions, trying to unite the two lands, however due to his brother, Thor’s distaste for the species, treaties fell apart leaving the kingdoms at war.” She took in a deep breath, having said all of that in one singular gust.

Phil nodded, before looking back and pushing the file towards Tony who, after a stern look from Pepper, accepted the file.

“In here is everything you need to know about the mission.”

Tony gave him an eye roll, before strolling towards a table in which many of the blueprints for his newest tech thing was located, gods knew what it was, and swept the all away, making space for the 3d hologram which sprung to life in the air around him. Lex was preoccupied asking Phil why he needed to know about Loki.

“So, whats with the need for a mythology lesson?” She was swinging back and forth on her heels, feeling curious.

“Well, we had a man break into one of our labs through something called ‘The Tesseract’ and-“

“Oh I know that.” She interrupted him, having him turn to her, shocked in a sense.

“You, you know what ‘The Tesseract’ is?”

“Yup.”

He took a step back, looking at Lex with trepidation, a little wary of a child who knew about a weapon of mass destruction.

“Its one of the 6 stones, right?” Coulson felt himself relax, clearly it was a different Tesseract she was thinking of.

“Sure kid.”

Lex was distracted by a roaring sound coming from behind her, turning to see a green creature smashing through several military grade vehicles, along with a tank, before barrelling towards two personnel and batting them away easily. She gasped slightly, in awe of the creature in front of her.

Tony had his head bowed over the workplace, one of his hands rubbing the back of his neck and the other leaning against the station bench. Lex could vaguely hear Pepper escorting Coulson out, gesturing towards the two Starks at the workbench and making an exaggeration of how long they’d be up, reassuring Coulson that they would do their research, yet knowing in the back of her mind she would force them both to bed by midnight, maximum.

Lex was transfixed, looking at the different people dancing across the screen, spotting Natasha kicking her way to a door, knocking some poor guy out who had no clue what hit him, along with a man in blue white and red armour, brandishing a shield of the same colour scheme. He looked suspiciously like the man on the poster Tony had hanging in his room, his blond hair cut in a military style, swept to the side in a convenient fashion. Tony had a huge crush on this guy, and if they would be working together she was sure it was going to end in Tony making a huge ass of himself.

The one person that caught her eye was a man in the corner of the screen, appearing out of what seemed to be a sort of portal, powered by the space stone, or ‘Tesseract,’ as Phil had called it. He landed in a kneeling fashion before remaining in that same position for several moments, then jerking upwards and bringing his staff up and releasing a ball of blue light from it, targeting the cluster of engines causing it to explode. Chaos ensued thereafter, resulting in multiple bodies littering the floor and two people being, possessed?

Lex felt an element of familiarity in the back of her mind, looking at the back profile of this man, as if she had seen him somewhere before. His black hair, the clothes, all of it seemed like something from a long lost dream of sorts, the same as real life, but, different. Changed in a way.

If only he would just turn around-

A shot flew towards the camera, blanking out that certain feed, leaving the screen in a static which was beyond frustrating, removing any feeling of familiarity that lex had previously felt, leaving her feeling somewhat empty. Her mind was racing whilst her exterior was calm, reaching to find out why she felt like she knew the man in the video, but nothing came to her.

She gave a little frustrated sigh, turning back towards the other video feeds and scanning the faces in front of her, all enhanced or extraordinary in some way, all completely different, all amazing in their own way.

“Looks like imma be up very late doing homework, you wanna help me revise?” Tony was looking down at her, watching her soak up everything in front of her.

“Only if we get Wendy’s.” Tony chuckled and looked up to the ceiling.

“J.A.R.V.I.S.?”

“Already on it sir.” The automated British voice responded, like Lex’s, but fancier. J.A.R.V.I.S. spoke in a way which was fit for the queen herself, Lex was more of a poshish London accent.

She drew up a chair for herself, plopping down next to Tony and bringing out a pencil and art pad, ripping away her latest drawing (a sketch of Pepper, which was surprisingly in proportion and well coloured, the kid wasn’t half bad at this) and put a title on the next page in big bubble letters; ‘The Extraordinary’s,’ and began making a list of people, leaving space underneath for making notes.

“Ready when you are paps.”

#tony stark x steve rogers #tony stark #steve rogers #tony stark and steve rogers #daughter!stark #tony stark dad #dad tony stark #stony #the avengers #avengers #captain america #iron man #tony stark is iron man #captain america is steve rogers #tony and steve #tony stark and steve #steve rogers and tony #original female character #peter parker

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avasilvugh · 7 years

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Now that we know how they react with Kara getting hurt any head cannons on how the kids act when Lena gets hurt or is in danger? Do they have any concept of how many threats arise because of her family name or has enough time passed since Lex that it's just a bad memory?

so this ask sort of goes hand in hand with this other one i received so i sort of split the long answer between the two!! i’ll link it for ya babes, enjoy the angst and the superbabies Constantly Worrying abt their human mommy

so like?? if u think the kiddos react poorly when its kara that’s hurt, i need ya to remember that they’re still pretty confident that kara will always walk away from a fight in one piece. like she might get hurt?? but they (perhaps a lil naively) dont think that kara’s rlly ever going to be Hurt. like they’re terrified in the moment, but it doesn’t like?? stick i guess?? i guess it’s sort of like…….she’s a superhero, danger sort of comes with it and kara’s careful and she’s like??? invincible?? one time stella gets rlly scared for her, so maia gets the idea to prove that they cant get hurt and bends like all of the kitchen knives trying to stab her hand so like…thats what’s in the kiddos’ heads when kara goes off to save the city/world. bent kitchen knives and stella’s laughter and maia’s grin and finn rolling his eyes but going alone with it, holding his hand over open flame to prove he can’t get burned

but lena?? lena is terrifyingly human. lena can burn and bruise and bleed and each kiddo has their own relationship to that, like finn cries and frets and maia seethes and rages and stella worries and plans (mind u, stella probably is the most……not ok with it, but she’s the most comfortable with lena’s vulnerability if only bc she’s just as vulnerable, often has a similar target on her back from lex/lillian bc she’s the most easily hurt of the kiddos??)

god they dont handle lena being in danger well At All and they handle her being hurt even worse, bc like?? she doesn’t heal as fast as kara, she heals at a human rate and there’s no magic sun lamp to make her all better

like when the kiddos are p young (like finn’s eleven or so) lena gets in a minor car accident and breaks her wrist and they all sort of freak the fuck out and that first day after she’s released from the er, she’s taking pain killers and is sort of just lazing around and taking it easy and the kiddos wont leave her side, like kara runs out to pick up dinner and the kids r sort of hovering around lena, pretending like theyre doing their own things, but when she comes back, they’ve all just cuddled up to her on the couch and maia’s carefully painting the nails on lena’s injured hand and stella’s fallen asleep on lena’s lap and finn’s tucked up against lena’s good side and they dont rlly move for the rest of the night tbh

i would say they have a p good grasp of the sort of threats against lena, like they grew up knowing how to behave in panic rooms and learned several emergency drills as part of their routine and saw lena hurt, threatened more times than they’d ever like to remember. they react as well as can be expected from kids in that sort of situation, and it helps a lot that their moms r so good and rlly work to make sure they feel safe as much as possible and try and assure them as best they can

but like?? they’re all so protective of lena, they rlly are, and unfortunately they have good reason to be. she’s on several ppl’s shit list tbh, and there are a fair few attempts on her life within the kids’ memories, like stella was there for several just bc she generally spends more time around lena and every single time resulted in her refusing to leave lena’s side for weeks after the fact. she just Will Not, like when she’s older and has to go to school, she is just constantly texting lena and like normally lena would tell her to stop, she needs to pay attention in class, but she also saw stella all but wailing in kara’s arms when lena got loaded into the ambulance so maybe she writes a note for stella’s teachers asking that they excuse her texting for a couple weeks

woo that got Dark

finn like…..idk its not like he feels like As the Man of the House he needs to protect all the girls in his life bc thats ridiculous and ignores their agency and his mamas raised him right, but he grew up watching kara protect their family, their city, the earth and he carries those instincts rlly deep in him and like he worries abt everyone, he’s such a worrier, but its different for maia and for kara and its even different for stella, bc stella at least has powers, can sense things, but lena is??? completely human????

and the first time he’s fully aware of this is when he’s three and his little sister is still so small and round and giggly and he had a stomach ache so lena calls out from work, tells jess to push her meetings so she can stay home and she’s put maia down for a nap and is coming in to check on him when he hears her scream from down the hall and like?? u know how little kids dont necessarily know when bad shits going down, but they Know?? well he knows.

so finn forgets all abt how his tummy hurts and runs as fast as he can and he’s rounding the hall just as kara barrels through a window, shoves him into the bathroom and pulls the door closed, but he saw lena on the floor, face twisted in pain with blood at her temple, oozing sluggishly from her shoulder and down her arm, saw the masked man that stood over her

he doesnt rlly ever forget that. the memory fades a little, dulls over time, but he has a lot of nightmares abt it, can’t completely put it behind him bc it was the first time he realized his mommy wasnt the same as his mama, wasnt as strong, wasnt as safe

it’s rlly bad for almost half a year after that, like he has nightmares more often than he doesnt and ends up in kara and lena’s bed most nights after waking up sobbing

when he gets older he sort of?? he doesn’t outgrow that bone deep fear, but it gets channeled into different avenues i guess

the first time maia ever has to confront that shit, she’s eight and its the assassination attempt from sun is gonna shine above and she’s never?? realized??? like she saw lena with a broken wrist and she’s seen her sick and so on and so forth so she’s got a grasp on the fact that lena’s human, not quite so invulnerable, but she’s never rlly understood what the consequences of that might mean?? but then they’re all sprawled on the floor of the deo and finn’s wailing into kara’s arms abt how he thought they were dead and she looks at lena and she looks at stella and she looks at kara and she’s terrified suddenly and she starts to cry and it all becomes a blur after that but then it’s a couple weeks later and she’s finally processed a little and she sort of scares her moms bc she crawls into their bed one night very late and asks very seriously if lena’s going to die

and like??? shit what are you supposed to say when your eight year old asks if you’re going to die??? jesus, there was no chapter abt this in literally any parenting book either of them have ever read

they explain it as best they can, that there are some very bad people in the world and they dont like lena very much and sometimes they want to hurt lena, but kara’s quick to remind maia that they’re all very safe and that she and aunt alex and uncle james and everyone at the deo work rlly hard to make sure they all stay safe but maia’s sort of changed after that??

and like…..her anger isnt from this one flashpoint alone, but it is a launching point. like?? her mom is so kind and loving and soft, why would anyone want to hurt her?? why should the world allow her to get hurt??? it’s not fair. so maia gets angry and she stays angry and she takes it out on bad ppl that hurt her family, takes it out on bad ppl that try to hurt lena and the difference btwn how she reacts with kara and how she reacts with lena is that she never, never says a word of it to lena, she refuses, bc if she does that, she’s admitting she’s scared that lena’s going to get taken from them, she’s admitting that lena’s human, that she’s mortal, that she can bleed and die and maia’s not willing to admit that

stella is probably the kiddo that never rlly has the realization bc its so ingrained in her like and i dont mean this in a bad way but there’s this understanding that where kara and finn and maia are alike, stella and lena are alike and stella understands that she’s not as strong as her siblings so it makes sense that lena’s not as strong as them either, u know?? it doesnt come as a surprise or anything and her powers mean that the threats to her mother dont come as a surprise either, bc by the time she’s registered what those threats rlly mean, she’s already been living with the reality of them for years

and ive said this a bunch but stella responds by becoming lena’s shadow tbh, she just sticks even closer to her mom and freaks out when she can’t bc she feels rlly powerless??? she cant help kara, but that makes sense, bc stella’s not the same as kara?? but she’s like lena and she can’t help her either, so what good is she to anyone, what use is she, how does she deserve her mothers

and to be fair, most of these feelings arent hers alone, bc when she gets sad or angry or hurts, its a lot easier for her to sort of take on negative emotions from the rest of the world, so it sort of spirals but that is the reality of it, she’s sad and she’s scared and she refuses to let lena out of her sight every time lena gets threatened or hurt

THERES UR DAILY DOSE OF SUPERBABIES ANGST, UR WELCOME

#supergirl #supercorp #lena luthor #kara danvers #superbabies #aLSO V DARK IM SORRY #anonymous #human interaction

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perksofbeingamaineiac · 5 years

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June 29, 2019

It has been an insane week.

Monday started off shit. Woke up in a terrible mood. Tried to avoid everyone all day. Did what I had to, had dinenr with Christina which was nice. Helped me get out of the funk a little.

Tuesday I sat outside and enjoyed the weather after work. Made the best of the day. I still wasn’t feeling 100%.

Wednesday I saw G. We finally talked. We were talking about friends and thenI asked why the wolds of friends and his and I relationship don’t collide. He said then we would have to stop fucking. He keeps me so separate because when the relationship ends he doesn’t want it to feel like a breakup. He wants us to continue being friends and be happy with that. It makes sense. I guess if he is my friend I want to do things with him that I would do with my friends and he would do with his. Hanging out at my house for example. Then we somehow got on the topic on feelings. He said that we will never date. Then he asked me how I felt and I admitted that I have thought about it, I am glad he said that because it is what I needed to hear. He told me that it isn’t me, he just doesn’t think we will be compatible financially if we were to date and get married. He said he wouldn’t date someone he doesn’t see himself marrying. Isn’t dating finding out if that person is a good choice? Working on compromising and understanding one another. Learning one another’s goals and helping them achieve them.

I don’t think I am in a bad spot for money. I finished school debt free. I have been working since I was 18. I have been saving money. Spending some, but saving some. I make more than a lot of other people my age. I don’t want to be making 30k a year forever. I have backup plans. I want to grow in the field I am in and then when I am ready to settle down I will get a real job. Did he mean that we spend money differently? Thats something thats negotiable and will/can change.

He said we will do monthly check ins to make sure that I am okay. He said he doesn’t want to hurt me. I get that. If I am hurt I will tell him. I have to. Of course this hurts right now, but thats because I just got rejected. I will be okay. Im more scared of losing him in my life than admitting that I am hurting. The only way to keep him in my life is admitting that I am hurting so we can stop fucking. We can still hang out and do things. Just not sex. That will hopefully be good to. when the time is right.

I made a comment about how much our friendship means to me and he said that he doesn’t think that it means more to me than him. He thinks that he plays a bigger part in my day to day than I do in his, but he still appreciates the friendship as much as I do.

I am okay. Just pondering on if the financial thing is something that he thinks that isn’t true or if its something I am willing to negotiate. At one point he said “we can try and date and see how it goes, but I have already made up my mind so that wont even work. He ha thought about it then? Why has he written me off? It can’t just be the financial thing. Hella confused, but okay. I can focus on other relationships and just hope for the best out of our friendship.

I had Manny’s stag and doe last night. Rafa made me really mad and annoyed. She kept talking out of her ass and then had the decency to ask when I am doing a BBQ again. I kinda punched back and the people who showed up last weekend were like oh shit and she was just trying to argue back. I wasn’t having it. She could have told me the day I asked that she was busy, not 2 hours before everyone is suppose to show up. Im kind of done with a lot of people in that group.

Lex invited me up to the cottage for the weekend. Waiting for her to come pick me up now. Her great uncle died so she is at the funeral. Hoping she isn’t done late. Really wanna just go up, have fun and drink a lot.... felt good being drunk last night.

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jessefandomunited · 7 years

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Jesse preference (all the characters; if you could, please). The song that reminds him of you and why

Alrighty lets do this

Atlas: Definitely the song “Confidence”, I know i’ve used this song before for him but it’s just so fitting. he’s very much one who is like “ i am awesome and i’m going to show it” It’s just so fitting and I love this song

Mark: I’d use Oh No (again i know i’ve used this but it’s really good for him) “ Don’t do love don’t do friends i’m only after success” I think it fits his cold exterior very well. I feel like he is more how i portray Atlas on this blog, however Atlas is actually a good guy, once he trust you.

Mills: I think the song “ Little Wonders” is good for him. Especially after the end of “The Living Wake” it’s such a sad ending but he is probably still reminiscing but knowing that good things are still to come.

Mike: Radioactive but Imagine Dragons. I mean it fits him really well. He has be altered to be this killing machine, “welcome to the new age, i’m radioactive” also he is a smoker of the drug variety (maybe he stopped after his anxiety was turned off but i mean the part where they say “ i’m breathing in the chemicals” It works. XD Idk i think i’m reaching a bit, i still think it works though.

Columbus: “Drive by” it’s kind of Columbus and Wichita but it fits SO GOOD for them I mean just listen to the first part” On the other side of a street I knewStood a girl that looked like youI guess that's deja vuBut I thought this can't be true'Cause you moved to west L.A or New York or Santa FeOr where ever to get away from me

Oh but that one nightWas more than just rightI didn't leave you cause I was all throughOh I was overwhelmed and frankly scared as hellBecause I really fell for you”

Sound like anyone you know? Sound like a night they had together dancing? hu? hu? I thought so If you get a chance look it up and think of columbus and Wichitas relations ship, it fits.

Nick: Stressed out. Not a lot of these characters are highschool, college aged kids who have stress, however Nick is kind of more where this song is geared towards. He’s in that state where he wants to go back when things were simpler. I don’t know i think it fits well.

Simon: I think the song Hard Times works really really well with Simon. I mean he goes through a lot of crap, all the friggin time, so this just works. Especially the part where it’s like

“ Walking aroundMy little rain cloudHanging over my headAnd it ain't coming downWhere do I go?Gimme some sort of signYou hit me with lightning!Maybe I'll come alive”

I think it fits so so well with Simon....also he needs a hug...always...i’ve said that before.

NIcholas: This is going to sound odd but i’d say Waving through the Window by Owl City. This song is very much about someone on the outside looking in and wanting to belong. The entire voyage of Nick is trying to be who his uncle is when that isn’t him. He’s looking in at what his uncle wants him to do and he just can’t function. He just waiting for an answer

“Give them no reason to stareNo slipping up if you slip awaySo I got nothing to shareNo, I got nothing to say”

He just wants to be how he thinks everyone else is, and not make waves. Luckily he fixes that.

Lex: Now this one is a bit of a stretch but i think it works for him really well “ They “ by Jem. “Who made up all the rules, we follow them like fools” This can be for someone just simply going against social norms, but it can also be taken to the extreme that Lex displays. Who says we need to listen to these alien that have “invaded” our planet (aka . Superman) Who made up the rule that it is wrong to kill if it saves more lives in the end. I can see it easily be turned into a darker song with the right tone and deeper vocals.

Charlie: XD so I am running low on songs, however, i fond a song that would go good for the antagonist Mick i think it was, in charlies movie “ In the air tongiht”

“Well if you told me you were drowning, I would not lend a handI've seen your face before my friend, but I don't know if you know who I amWell I was there and I saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyesSo you can wipe off that grin, I know where you've beenIt's all been a pack of lies”

The whole movie is him trying to find a way to get back at Charlie for snitching on him. However he tries more to manipulate him into thinking he’s a good guy and not a bad guy. And it works, for a little bit, but then he reverts back to his old behaviors, and even though this song is probably about a girl cheating on her boyfriend, and the boyfriend knows, i don’t care, it doesn’t mean it in this context okay.

Eli: I feel like this has been much harder that the Jesse playlist, I mean, you guys give me the songs there, here i have to find the songs and write a long paragraph about it. Eli is a hard one though, and i was thinking of the song “Over my Head” but thats more about a girl than being just stressed about everything. I Am settling on the most prestegious of music....the Jonas Brothers XD. The song “ I just want to play my music”. Music is his life , he loves it so much and it’s his only escape for anything, it gives him comfort.

“Turn on that radioAs loud as it can goWanna dance until my feet can't feel the groundSay goodbye to all my fearsOne good song and they disappearAnd nothing in the world can bring me down”

It’s his escape, he feels at home in his incredibly stressed out life. He has to take control of the family as a High schooler because no one else will. I believe that all the stress of this is what leads him to drinking so much. However, i also think that after his mom agrees to go to rehab and he goes to the fancy music school, he is able to finally gain control of his drinking problem....but that’s just me

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survivorsolomonislands · 7 years

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Episode 2 “#NewQueenInTown” - Lily

hey hoes so ill do my first impressions or w/e chrissa- kween! i was hoping she'd stay awhile but u know when someone wants to be elimed then u gotta! dana- idk ha!hevjkbev i dont remember a dana in any of these so! idk how she plays so yikes but i wouldnt be surprised if shes close w the other newer people lexo- im love her! im hoping we can do #that for callie tru matt- i played a game with him once and he voted me out so :/ but i think we can work well together tbh mitchell- hes malaysia and thats all i know, im not sure how he played in malaysia and lowkey the only times i ever interacted with him he kinda annoyed me gtg monty- aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh i love monty, i know he will be one of my closest allies for sure! i cant wait to slay w him linus- hes from winnipeg and he seems sneaky to me and hes a newer school player so he could be close w the others ryan tiddie palmer - i love my dadt sdhvbdfv but also im a little wary of him bc i have a feeling he would love to vote me out but as of rn i need him so, we'll see zak- i voted him out in palau and thats all i got kjehfvbjr i didnt even kno they played a game before anyway hes also part of the potential new school alliance

also heres the vote tea, basically mine and lexis names were being thrown around and i was like??? we aint even do anything so then we started throwing zaks and linus name around. anyway me and mont were freaking out bc we needed 2 more people to get majority and vote zak and save me and lex, so we recruit chrissa and we make an alliance chat w ha. we call and talk about who we can pull in and such. so come the next mornin i start talkin to matt who said he was down for voting zak. honestly i trust matt he seems more trustworthy than other people plus i dont think he knows a lot of the tribe members tru so if i keep him close then my alliance should be good tru. anyway i talk to lexi to figure stuff out, and i talk to zakriah and basically tell him that im willing to vote lexi next round or w/e, mind u this is after chrissa anounces that she wants to be voted out, and well hopefully by telling him this i can gain his trust a little and get some tea from ha. also zak knows that me mont and lexi were targetting him??? honestly idk who couldve told him unless it was chrissa??? no one else shouldve known tru, anyway so i get the tea from that mitchell is the one who told him that he heard my name being thrown around and kjefbv like i dont wanna confrontational or anything but i went to mitchell and asked him about it and he was "like honestly it was like a grapevine thing tbh like nobody was like "...how bout karen" it was more of "i've heard Karen"" LIKE??????????????????????????????? REALLY BITCH THAT DONT ANSWER MY QUESTION. grapevine my ass, like thats what zak told me too, like !!!!!!!!! just tell me bc if u dont then im gonna assume that ur ass is the one started the whole "i heard" thing nnnnn anyway!!!! im just relieved that chrissa is asking to be voted out bc this couldve been way more stressful aaaaaahhhhh honslee i was scared this was all a ploy to throw votes but i genuinely believe ha and i love chrissa too much to ever disrespect her wishes so :/ bye bye chrissa we hardly knew ye!

Not much has happened so far. We won the first challenge, which is awesome, and kinda gives me this fire to keep winning just so that we can keep beating the vets. It's kind of fun to be the underdogs (considering we all have much less experience than the vets) and to win. As long as we don't get a flash challenge, I'm not too worried about how well we do. Or at least, how well I do. I just don't want to be the person with the lowest score. Anyways, on day 2 or something Lily messages me and says we should be in an alliance, since we knew each other from a chat. So I said sure, and she gives me an idol clue she found! Holy shit! Lucky for her, I don't have any other alliances, otherwise I could so easily just play her. I don't have any plans to though - she seems very trusting and kind and I respect that. I just have to be careful it doesn't get me in trouble as long as we're aligned. So I go to search for the idol, with the clue she gave me in mind, and somehow end up finding the exact same clue she did. Hopefully we don't make the same mistake again next round.

https://youtu.be/hCcal7QtHWY

OMG okay so first off... Daisy comes to me saying she likes Jacob. Okay. Perfect. He's my ride or die anyways, so now we have a mutual ally we can lean on, and she says she wants to be in an alliance. Cool. Even better. Let's officialize this shit.

So Daisy makes the chat, and she says "alright Johnny and Jacob, let's add Willow and Luca" and I'm internally freaking out with Jacob on the side here, and Jacob and I are losing it in PMs and we're like "I think that wouldn't be the BEST idea, just because adding people late can make them think that they're going to be 4th and 5th" So Daisy is going to stick with us three being a f3.

Little does Daisy know that Willow wanted a four person alliance with me and Jacob already, and it didn't include Daisy, so it'll be easy for Willow to think she's on the in, and same for Daisy, which can be GREAT for later.

All I know is I'm going to have to do a little educating to Daisy on how to play this game, and making an alliance with three people and then adding two people LATE is no beuno sweetheart... Thank God Jacob and I prevented that one. At least we know we're in a core for now, and we can start picking off the weaker rookies............... or maybe we go after someone who looks like they can be smarter, and an independent player. Maybe Aro for example? Let's see what happens after immunity (giggle)

So after Chrissa announced she wanted to be voted out, Karen and I were able to talk to each other for the first time this game. I pushed that I didn't want to target her if it wasnt out of hate, and targeting each other based on lack of communication could be easily fixed - after all, what's better than an unlikely duo? I'm in two right now if I'm not being played: as far as I know Linus wants to work with me to get out Karen, and Mitchell also thinks that's what I want. However, I want me an ally in Karen, and Lexi or Mo's gotta go next.

Something terrible happened to me irl yesterday and Im in a bad headspace right now. I really dont feel like talking to anyone besides Luca and Johnny(whos actually pretty cool) so I cant wait to get to the swap. I tried connecting with Kaya a bit but she doesn't seem to like me very much. I have a terrible migraine and everything kinda sucks right now but I'll fight through it. I can't wait for the time when I eventually look back on this confessional and cringe at the angst lmao

I low-key hope I get taken out of this challenge early so I don’t have to sit around all night doing it, but the only way that’d be able to happen is everyone just went after me to start the challenge, and no one knows I’m good at live challenges except Chrissa, and she’s bye bye

Aw Dana assigned me to shoot my fuckbuddy aromal in the first round of the IC :( like the opposite of the hunger games up in here :(

This paintball challenge is so fucking FUN! Like, it's so cool to keep on my toes and constantly be dodging/shooting paintballs. It's like my own sort of little endurance challenge. I just have to be sure I don't miss any dodges... That's why I changed the conversation notification settings to notify me every time my name is said. :P But it's fun, anyway. And if I lose, I can blame my team and use the machete I got. >:3c

So... let's play catch up!

Chrissa got voted out unanimously like she ASKED TO. It sucked bc I liked Chrissa but she was a lil strategically problematic so... whatevs. BUT then Karen starts being like "oh would you have voted for me? where'd my name come from?" and being kind of aggressive about it so... that turned me off. Honestly yeah I would've voted your ass out, you ignored me and continue to do so lol, but after that? I'm set. I think my allegiance with Dana is solidified by my complaining to her about Karen, and honestly? I see her as my #2 in this game.

Matt, the other option for my #2, also tells me he's ready to make a move against the Karen/Monty/Lexi coalition when we next go to Tribal Council. We're slaying this challenge so that won't be tonight, but when it does, Karen's ass is grass if I've got anything to say about it!!

Karen and Lexi still make minimal effort to talk with me. Pretty much nobody has been 1-on-1 talking with me throughout this whole 3-hour-long-so-far challenge which is also kind of ridiculous but??? What are you gonna do. I'm still sick so hopefully when I recover I'll start schmoozing like I usually do and stop oozing like I don't wanna do.

also fuk u mangrove swamp

RETWEET IF YOU ARE ON TEAM LA NEEDS TO GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP.

This challenge is murdering me. 4.5 hrs left SO.

So, I quit during the paintball challenge. I was the last person left on my tribe and I just couldn't see myself pulling off a win, not against five people - I did manage to get one out on my own but it seemed very doubtful I could have gotten them all. I'm not sure how I feel about throwing it like that, I probably could have faked it and just posted a shoot at the 6 mark which might have been better for my game, cause I'm not sure how that will effect how the vets see me from this point on, or if my tribe finds out and gets mad at me for it, but Y'ALL SHOULD BE HAPPY I DIDN'T MAKE US SUFFER THROUGH ANOTHER FOUR HOURS OF THAT @ VETS. I hate giving up/losing but at the same time, this is only the second challenge of the game. If this has been an individual immunity challenge, damn right I would have stuck it out but it's still early on and I think this vote will be pretty straight forward. IF I manage to get voted out I'll feel so stupid for throwing it but as of right now I trust my alliance and feel safe. (famous last words)

So now Star wants to talk to me...... Tooo little too late bud. You've been talking to the least amount of people this whole game, you didn't even help with the immunity challenge, and now you're coming to me all worried about the vote? Sorry you're in this situation, but you made your own bed, and now you have to lay in it.

On a different note, I was talking to Jacob, and we were thinking that two of us should throw our votes onto someone else, just in case of an idol play, but honestly, I don't wanna be that paranoid freak always worrying about an idol, but I also don't wanna a repeat of the last tumblr survivor I played in, where I got idol'd out of the game, so I'm trying to be careful. I might talk to Daisy about it, but I don't want to come off as paranoid, so it'll be an interesting talk if I choose to have it...

(Slightly later)

OMG LILY JUST TOLD ME SHE HAS THE IDOL I'M SCREAMING!! Now I don't have to worry about a fucking idol play. Not only that, but she tells me that I'm the only person in the game that knows about the idol, which is huge for me because it means that she trusts me the most, and this can be a relationship outside of Jacob, Daisy, Willow and Luca, so this is really good. I am going to focus on forming a broship with Aro too, just to have that connection, but I think that I'm starting to become very trusted in the tribe, which is good.

I know my struggle is going to be when we switch tribes, and just hoping that the luck of the draw doesn't put me onto a tribe with bad numbers, but even if I do, I think I'll be able to charm my way out of it. The fact that I want to vote out most of these people, and they still continue to prove to me that they trust me the most is CRAZY, but Lily is definitely going to be a tool I'm going to utilize in the game for a long long time, and I hope she and her idol make it deep enough in the game to benefit me.

Sorry... rambling. My struggle now is whether or not to tell Jacob. I don't want to lose his trust later in the game by him finding out about this idol, and him knowing that I knew about it. I think I'm going to tell him about it later tonight, and I hope that he'll be thrilled, but he isn't even going to be back for day change... At least now I know that I don't have to worry about the idol, especially because I doubt there are more than one idols out there, from my specific tribe, so definitively, it's bye bye Star time :(

Jesus.... Karen and I survived that round.. In what world is that actually realistic? But we did and thankfully with little issues like messy thrown votes or Chrissa playing an idol on herself after misting us all. I was really nervous that it was all an actual trap because I have seen it happen before and boy is it terrifying but bless her heart for being true to us all.

The challenge was one that I have won before so I was not too nervous about the whole workings of the challenge but I was nervous about how long the challenge would go. I was so tired yesterday for some reason and I do not know if I could have lasted until 2 am with very little break. I would have tried my best of course so I could make sure Karen and I were safe but there is only so much a single person can do which L.A. ended up proving. The Veterans won the challenge THANK GOD and so we do not have to worry about one of us being voted out bless. Right now I would def consider Karen my final 2 because we do share the common homie of Callie and I do my best to trust Callie's judgement most of the time (the other times... I just can not defer from what god wants). My only issue is that Karen has a lot of friends on this tribe that I fear she might pick over me such as Monty and that makes me a bit scared of her but right now we sort of need each other in terms that we are both the most threatening ones on our tribe at the moment so if she gets rid of me, she does not have many people to hide behind and I have been known to be a very good meat shield for those that take advantage of it so here is to praying she is actually my final 2.

Okay I love my tribe now. Seriously though I was only disliking them because I was too mentally checked out to socialize. They're all really sweet people and omg it was all i could do to stop them from pronouncing Zaks name wrong lmao during the challenge. Even though I outta be pissed that more than half of us got eliminated for breaking simple rules, I loved that they were cheery about it.

For the vote ahead, it should be a smooth 9-1 against Star. He hasn't been too active thus far and everybody seems to be on board.

https://youtu.be/RpyYL7gVQEE

LAST ROUND VOTING: A SUMMARY We get back to camp after being beaten in the immunity challenge and things devolve into chaos. Mitchell starts whispering "Lexi" and then shouting "WHO SAID THAT! I HEARD YOU! lexi.... WHO WAS THAT!!!!" Lexi and RTP climbed into the shelter and started singing songs together, waiting for other people to join. Matt sat himself on a rock and just kinda sat there...waiting.... Zak was running around, talking to each and every person saying he heard something different to everyone, calling every guy Miss and every girl Qween. Karen was sitting trying to have sensible discussions, and Mitchell and Zak saw this and started freaking out. Mitchell kept his calm and kept whispering lexi... but Zak thought he said Karen and started freaking out. Meanwhile, I'm running around screaming at people that Zak is dead weight and Linus is a rat, but nobody is really listening to me. Meanwhile, Linus disappeared into the woods to maybe go try on some wigs or some shit, and Dana is off talking to anything that moves, with various degrees of success. In the middle of camp is Chrissa, just sitting. Me, Karen, Zak, and Mitchell are all screaming about who should go, and she silently raises her hand and says four words. "I. I will go." Everyone stopped and just kinda looked at her, and then started screaming. Not words, just incoherent noises, and that never stopped until Chrissa's torch was snuffed by Isaac

real confessional for this round: So, this has been a pretty chill round. As a tribe, our number one priority was winning immunity. I staying longer than a few people, until I had to go swim. I still need to talk to Dana, Lexi, and RTP this round to keep those connections alive, but other than that, my social game is less shitty than in the past! So, overall, this is not looking terrible for me!

IS DAISY FUCKING KIDDING ME?!? Daisy, girl, we spoke about this. Adding people to alliance chats can only cause problems. Making a brand new chat is the way that it has to be. I can't be closely tied with someone who is actually that oblivious to how this game goes. It's like telling someone that there's a three person alliance, and we just want them to be fourth on the ladder. THAT'S NOT HOW THIS WORKS. Luckily for me, it's someone as ditzy as Lily is, and it's someone who doesn't really talk to a lot of people, and she's someone who has an idol, and now Daisy and I were both told by Lily, which is why Daisy added her.

One thing that Lily and Daisy aren't aware of is that Jacob knows about the idol too, and that's because I told him, so with Jacob in the loop, and me being the one who told me, is PRIME. I need to be the barrier of communication between all of them, and right now I think I'm doing a steady job. One thing I need to work on is my relationship with Allie and LA, because they're two SMART girls, who I haven't been spending much time talking to, so I might work on that later today, even though I've spoken briefly about the vote to both of them, I need MORE!

Well after the mess with Chrissa we were lucky enough to win, and I think the challenge was a good bonding experience for the tribe. Now I'm kind of in the middle right now I like my alliance a lot but I think I could work with Karen and Lex in the future so I'm nervous about alienating them and I'm like back and forth back and forth like a metronome or some dumb swingy shit. So lemme just cross my fingers we don't have to go to tribal, and that somebody I know will get this damn idol ay dios bio

We lost the immunity challenge earlier. I'm super disappointed but I doubt I'm in any trouble at tribal council. I kinda messed up by posting early, lost my head and this probably was a factor in our tribe losing. On their tribe, only three people messed up.

But challenge aside, I feel I'm pretty safe for the time being here. I like Jacob, Willow, LA, Johnny and Allie and I think I'm getting along with Aromal too. Really the only people who I haven't really been talking with are Star (who's getting evicted today), Daisy and Lily.

I should probably talk more with the other two. All that said, this game is phenomenal. You can never know if you're really safe.

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!! I FOUND THE FUCKING IDOL AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA But like... wow. I find the idol clue on my very first search, and then on my second search, I find the idol itself. When will your fave... #newqueenintown

We won! Updates game wise so I'm just utr1 instead of inv.

1. Zak is still a self righteous prick, but he's also smart enough to just flat out target me rn, so idk.

2. Matt is easy to talk game with, he's seeming a bit paranoid though.

3. Dana and Ryan, still love em both.

4. Mitchell is everyone's best friend, hillarious dude. That also sadly means he is the biggest threat in the game. Of course, right now I want to work with threats, but eventually he will be scary.

5. Karen is still my target.

6. Gotta try and make Lexi and Monty not flip at a swap.

7. Linus is the best, he's probably the front runner to win right now.

Okay so I keep forgetting about confessionals oops. But I'm going to my first tribal council ever tonight and I'm a little nervous. I feel like this vote tonight should be pretty simple because everyone in the tribe wants to vote out Star, but I'm worried that he might have an idol or something since 9/10 people in our tribe looked for the idol yesterday. Also I'm still a little bit irritated at myself from the challenge yesterday because it said 7:05 on my computer when I pressed send but it was still 7:04 on the skype clock or whatever Idk

#thequeenstaysqueen

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ruffiorocks · 5 years

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Lena Luthor and her lack of support no matter what she does.

Long post. Not really Kara friendly, but its past events.

Soooo, losing myself down a Youtube rabbit hole of Supergirl clips, i have concluded that Lena Luthor does not receive any kind of support from her friends andor/significant other if whatever she is doing doesn't fit in with their ‘hero code’ that for some reason she still isnt really privy to or involved in. Despite the fact that she has saved the world and Supergirl MULTIPLE times!

It really does play out like this:

Lena, ‘I am going to invent......

Super friends ‘NO Lena you are not allowed to invent that because WE dont think its right!’

Lena, ‘I am pro..

Super friends ‘NO Lena! You cant’ support that because its the opposite of what we think’.

Sooo yeah, basically no matter what Lena does, unless it supports the Superfriends and it has their seal of approval she is some how wrong. Why? Because she has a mind of her own and isnt a senseless drone who believes a smile and hope will fix the worlds problems.

Lets look at some examples:

1. Lena invents the alien detection device, because she believes that humans have the right to know if an alien is among them. Kara, against this purely because she is an alien, actually struggles to come up with an argument against it. But when Lena turns around and says if aliens want to live in America thats their right and if humans want to know who they are than thats their right to, Kara, without a second thought destroys Lena’s device! Lena of course changes her stance at the end of the episode (and Kara does a little to) but even if she hadn't, it doesn't make her a bad person.

Lets review:

Kara went to the sister of Earths biggest alien hater to ask her view on the Alien Amnesty Act. Kara didnt like what she heard, she struggled to actually come up with a decent argument that didnt involve ‘I am an alien’. She then destroyed something that Lena probably spent months of hard work and millions of dollars on because ‘it didn't meet with Kara’s approval’. (Im actually really happy Lena got this working again to use it on Rhea!)

2. Lena manufactures Kryptonite to help save the life of her friend Sam who came to her for help. Now lets remember that Sam did actually go to Alex for help at the DEO and Alex found nothing. So it wasnt like Same didnt have options. But she clearly felt safer with Lena. To be frank,who wouldnt? I wouldnt want to knock on the DEO’s door and be like ‘hey! Im Reign, the murderous alien you've been looking for, but its not my fault’. I digress! Lena made Kryptonite to help Sam!

So, when Supergirl/Kara finds out that Lena has kept Sam a secret and had the nerve to have Kryptonite,(we learn later she made it, but told Kara it was Lex’s) what did she think? Well it was ALL about Kara! Sam wasnt even given a second thought. Kara doesn't agree that Lena should be allowed to have Kryptonite because she doesnt approve and apparently everything Lena does now needs the Super seal of approval. I mean, even Alex was sound with Lena after Lena explained.

Lets review, Lena has Kryptonite and used it to help keep her friend contained so she wouldnt go out murdering people. All this at Sams request, but the first thing Kara thinks of is Kara, because SHE isnt happy and wasnt involved . Because for some reason Kara has to know and be involved in all things and they have to have her seal of approval or Lena is some how bad.

3. Lena approaches Kara/Supergirl telling her she has something for her to help fight Reign and not to be alarmed because its in a lead lined case. Kara instantly alarmed because apparently that super hearing is useless and she is so lost in her current prejudice towards Lena that she has forgotten that Kryptonite can’t hurt her when its encased in Lead. Something that Lena JUST TOLD HER! Supergirl ‘is that Kryptonite?!’ ugh..duh Kara! Anyway, Lena tells her its to help her fight Reign, you know since NOTHING Kara has done so far has had any impact, but Lena (angel that she is) offers her the solution. Kara, ignoring what Lena just said gets pissed and tells Lena she has gall lying to her face, Lena finally sick of Kara’s bullshit and rightfully so, tells her she didnt lie. she made the Kryptonite. (OK i know she did lie, but you saw Kara’s reaction to Lena simply having what she thought was Lex’s kryptonite, could you imagine what she would have said if she knew Lena had made it to begin with? I can promise you one again Sam wouldn't have even factored into it.) Lena tells Kara she made it, and she super charged it for Reign. Kara, once again ignoring the possibility of defeating Reign, saving Sam and the world takes this personally and is like ‘You what?!’ Because once again Kara is the only person on the planet that matters right now. She then ORDERS Lena to give up her formula and anything Kryptonite related and give it to Alex and the DEO and tell her she is never going to make Kryptonite again because errr... KARA says so! I do love how Lena is just rolling her eyes at her. Lena tells her she thought she would be grateful, Kara once again thinking only about Kara doesn't understand how she should be grateful that Lena made the once substance on Earth that can kill her. Errrr because it can stop Reign you selfish, self involved, self righteous Kryptonain arse hole! Lena then tell her lots of things can kill humans but you dont see us being whiny arses about it.

Lena tells Kara she has a God complex, in this situation she isnt wrong. Kara goes off on one about the effects of Kryptonite and a smug Lena tells her thats exactly what she needs to subdue Reign. Kara, realizing that she does in fact need this Kryptonite because she has failed to come up with a solution herself, picks it up and even has the gall to turn around and say to Lena ‘even if we were on the same side’. No Kara! You are on the same side! Lena has been helping, keeping Sam safe and has come up with the solution you need

Lets Review, Lena told Kara she had something and not to be alarmed to which Kara was instantly alarmed. Kara got pissed at Lena for learning to make the one substance that could in fact save the day. She ignored the fact that it could in fact help Sam and thats why Lena made it. No it was ALL about Kara. Kara even told Lena they were not on the same side, even though Lena has done more to help Sam/Reign that Kara has and no one else seems to have an issue with Lena at all. It was all about how this would effect Kara and how wrong Lena was for making it. Once again Lena is in the wrong because Kara doesn't agree, it didnt have karas’s seal of approval, hence forth Lena is in the wrong.

4. While Reign is locked away in Lena’s cell, Lena uses a forcefield that blocks out Reign seeing them, even X ray vision. Kara,who literally just heard Lena say it blocks Reign looking at them decides to try to look through, because reasons i guess? Of course it hurts her and she gets pissed. Even though she just did that to herself! Then she decides to get pissed at Lena (AGAIN), Lena tells her the shock of looking through it keeps Reign in check. But of course that part goes over Kara’s head and it becomes all about Kara. She tells Lena they ‘talked about this; and if Lena made any weapons that could hurt Kryptonians she would tell her. Can i interject that this is Kara’s supposed ‘best friend’ and she immediately jumps to every bad conclusion she can? Lena says its not a weapon and then puts Kara in her place by telling her she will tell her about Kryptonite but she doesn't think about her while she makes other things.

Lets review, Kara who was just told by Lena that the force field blocked out Kryptonians decides to look through it anyway and gets in a mood and all offended because it hurt. Shocker! Lena tells her its to keep Reign (the murderous alien who just threatened to rip out Lena’s spleen, in check). This once again goes over Kara’s head and she immediately jumps to the conclusion that the force field is a weapon that can be used against her and how dare Lena even think of making something without informing this random super hero she barely knows who has no authority other than what she has given herself and from a secret government organisation Lena isn't even supposed to know exits! Kara is going no thought what so ever to Sam (again) or that Lena’s spleen is being threatened. Why? because Lena had the nerve to something without Kara’s approval or thinking about Kara first and we cant have that because the world revolves around Kara. Henceforth Lena is bad.

5. Kara, not trusting Lena at all asks her BOYFRIEND to break her trust and break into her vault to see if there is more Kryptonite there. Kara once again thinking of only Kara, thinks its OK to betray your best friend by getting her boyfriend to break into her personal vault. Kara then gets pissed at James because he suddenly grew a conscience at the very last second, after already breaking into L Corp and getting to the door of the vault, but not going in. Kara is annoyed that James decided to tell Lena what Kara/Supergirl asked him to do. Why? He literally just made the situation worse to score points with Lena. Lena will later learn that Supergirl did this and is notably pissed. Kara meanwhile is surprised by this.

Lets Review, Kara, once again thinking only of Kara, asked her best friends boyfriend to break into her personal vault and betray her trust because Kara is paranoid. Kara may have had a reason to be paranoid, but once again thinking only of Kara she manipulated James into betraying his girlfriend, Kara's best friend. (I dont care if he didnt go in, he still broke into L Corp. If my partner broke into my home but then decided not to steal something i would still be pissed and call the police!)

There are so many other things i could write about, like how Lena saved James’ ass from the DA but he treated her like crap for it. Lena helped to get rid of the Daxamites, but because Kara didn't like the method, one again it was ALL about Kara and her happiness with Mon El, because f**k the fact people are dying. Its technically not just Lena who brought the Daxamites, but Kara and Mon El’s selfishness.(Rhea didnt even attack until Mon El refused to go back with her) Kara not willing to let go and Mon El not willing to give up a cushty life to actually go and help his people become better people) Lena had to suffer the cold shoulder for weeks!)

But lately. its Lena and her idea to give people super powers and work with the government, James is instantly against it because it doesn't fit in with his moral code even though he told Lena he was fine with what she was doing. Until it involved the government. So once again Lena is the bad guy.

No one has a problem using Lena when she is needed though, Like when she saved Supergirls ungrateful ass from Kryptonite poisoning. Or when she created harun el to save all the people of Argo city. Or when she pilated the ship and helped Kara and Mon El fight Reign. Or when she managed to get her and Mon El to safety on the daxamites ship. Or when she saved all the aliens from being poisoned. Or when she brought cat co. Or when she killed the man she loved to save Supergirl etc etc.

Lena, does not receive support unless she is fitting in with other peoples ideals. She has got to have their approval or she is deemed the bad guy or questionable. At this point its a wonder she hasnt gone mad and simply become a villain already. She wants to save the world her way, she does in fact save the world a good few times. But because she doesn't kiss Supergirls ass and look for approval she is seen as the one in the wrong. Oh and Kara, as much as i do love her, can be the most self involved person on the show! Poor Lena proves herself over and over again, but she is never given full approval or trust. The poor girl can not win no matter what she does. Id like to say that Kara’s attitude has gotten better, she has been the one to support Lena defend her, but ONLY if it doesnt effect her directly. This latest season she has barely said two words to her, so only time will tell.

#lena luthor #kara danvers #anti james olsen #anti guardiancorp #supercorp #anti kara #anti mon el #(but only for a second)

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