#situationships with Exceptions have never gone well for me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hypergamiss · 2 months

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Hi I’m really going through it so would appreciate your advise/input💕 was basically in a talking stage/situationship for long time long distance. It was so draining for me because he kept continually hurting me but always flipping things on me trying to make it my fault when In reality it was always his fault and doing...he would be very attentive to me, consistent with communication and very nice to me with his words but his behavior told me otherwise...it was like a mind fuck. So now that it’s over, I am depressed and been like this for months. I keep up with self care, eat clean and workout but still feel SO. SAD. I have tried to go on dating apps again and gone on a few dates which went well except for the fact on one of them I was drinking and started crying so hard and talking about the guy to the guy I was on a date with and honestly just feel numb and have cried a lot over it over all these months . I know some girls just go on a hookup spree or just find a rebound but that’s not me and I’ve tired after months and not happy even still with the guy I was going on dates with that treats me well....Do you have any input?

Oof, girl, I feel your pain! That talking stage/situationship vortex sounds like emotional quicksand. And mind-games? No wonder you're still feeling the fallout! Here's my take, with a side of tough love and a sprinkle of humor:

This dude had the emotional range of a teaspoon. Hot and cold, sweet words but shady actions – classic gaslighting 101. Good riddance, even if it doesn't feel that way right now.

Self-care is essential, but sometimes the heart needs its own workout as well. Crying with your date? Honey, that wasn't the wine, your heart needed a good sob session.

Ditch the "Shoulds": Everyone heals in their own way, we're not robots. Hookups, rebounds, they're not for everyone. Trying to force yourself into that mold is only going to make you feel worse. Not to mention hook-up culture never benefits women at all, it's extremely unsafe physically and emotionally.

Numbness is...well, normal(unfortunately): After a mind-screw like that, your feelings are in self-defense mode. Be patient. Focus on small moments of joy, even if it's binge-watching trashy reality TV or going to a concert that will feed your soul(there are endless options).

Therapy, trusted friends, and books my dear: A professional can help you untangle those emotional knots and shut down the "it's my fault" soundtrack in your head. Friends can help with validating your emotions. Books can guide you similar to how a professional would, sometimes even better I would argue.

It's gonna take time. Your heart didn't break overnight, and it won't magically mend that quickly either. But with self-compassion, maybe some help, and ditching that manipulative jerk, you'll get your spark back.

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rosecrystal · 2 months

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Hello!!! So as a person who in the past also put up with a toxic situationship but is now living her best life after ending things (therefore when I say these things I’m never out of a place “I know better” but out of a “I understand, been there” place),

1. In all cases and situations, it’s always actions over words

2. Long distance can work out if both people work really hard on the relationship and want it equally (me and my bf started out long distance and now live together)

3. You were clearly unhappy with your ex and ended things with him. That means a part of yourself knows how much better you deserve and loves you a lot. Another part of you is still stuck to him because it’s the part that wants to keep repeating a certain dysfunctional cycle that you learned at a young age/doesn’t believe you are worthy of genuine unconditional love. Looks like breaking it off with him might have triggered something in you and that’s what you have to explore, you have to ask yourself a lot of questions, you have to go on memory trips and try to understand whether the dynamics with this guy remind you of any early dynamics with the adult figures in your life. I know I say this always but in 99% of the cases tolerating these toxic situationships is as a result of toxic early dynamics or attachment style issues, and unfortunately they will keep repeating until you get to the root of the issue. Ask yourself why you are still stuck to this guy. Is it love? What would you being in love with someone who hurts you and is all words and no actions imply when it comes to your self love and consideration of self? If not love, is it unhealthy attachment because he reminds you of something? If so, what is it?

4. Since you are clearly yet not over this situationship, you should put a stop on dating without feeling guilty over it. You are not missing out on anything and you have all the time in the world. It is both unfair to you (again shows a lack of self love, forcing things on yourself before you are ready), and unfair to other people who deserve to be met with someone who is over their ex and clear on what the want. Besides, until you solve what is holding you back you will either meet the same person in a different body and repeat another situationship, or if you meet the right person you might fail to recognize them.

5. Working out, eating healthy and being active is great, but it is not enough. You need to add deep self reflection and introspection to the mix, maybe try journaling, meditation, and reading books (and I don’t mean the cheesy self help ones but try going for something that speaks about/reflects some of your findings on yourself after you’ve done some introspection, a good book can in itself be an introspection tool).

6. You shouldn’t see your feelings on this situation as a problem to solve but rather a door that can help you understand where certain issues lie. It is an opportunity so feel, trace back your feelings, analyze. And don’t try to hide from yourself. Use this period to put in the work and everything else will naturally flow. You don’t need a rebound, not a hookup spree, you merely need to get in touch with yourself.

Wishing you luck and a steady path to self love! 💕

#answered

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violetdahlias · 7 months

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my best friend is offline and i need to rant about him so new boy tag! everyone meet musical boy!

so musical boy and i met 10 years ago when we started going to school together, i was in 3rd grade and he was in 4th. i think i always found him cute but i didn’t start liking him until 6th grade. our school was putting on aladdin jr the musical, and i really wanted to be part of it but didn’t have the guts to audition. all my friends auditioned and became part of it, and guess who got the lead? obviously musical boy. well now i had to be part of the musical, and just my luck, the new girl who just moved here ended up moving again, so i asked if i could take her place in the musical. i got the part no audition needed, and woohoo i was in the musical with my crush!

so what happens with us during the musical? absolutely nothing. oh except i punched him in the face during rehearsals. yeahhh, so choreography wasn’t set yet and the directors were trying different things. this time they decided that they would have aladdin and jasmine run across the stage through the dancers during one jump ahead. well during the line “one swing ahead of the sword” our choreography was to act like we were swinging a sword with our hands held together in a fist. so who runs in front of me when i’m swinging? …musical boy. i punched my crush in the nose. in front of like 20 other people. i really don’t remember what happened after that other than the director being like “okay let’s take five” and me never apologizing to him other than right after i punched him saying “oh my god i’m so sorry are you okay?” we DID however interact again, on the opening night of the musical. the whole cast was chilling in the library before our call time and we decided to play a very big game of stella ella ola. and for anyone that doesn’t know stella ella ola, it’s a circle sitting hand holding slapping game. (that’s a terrible description go look it up.) anyway, who would sit beside me asking people to move over, but musical boy. his hand was very warm and he hit my hand too hard every time on purpose. and did i ever talk to him after that? uh no. i would however make my friends sit with me by the basketball courts every recess so i could watch him play though. our classes also took a trip to washington when i was in 7th grade but i had a different crush as that time, so that was the extent of our elementary to middle school relationship.

now onto high school! absolutely nothing juicy here to be honest. we went to different high schools so the only updates about him i got were from one of my besties who also happens to be his neighbour. i had added him on snap sometime in may but we didn’t really talk, just a few snaps back and forth, and i accidentally ghosted him cause snapchat glitched and opened all my snaps without me noticing. basically nothing interesting happened. untillllll….. my first day of 12th grade. interestingly enough, i had just gotten out of a situationship with a guy that we had gone to school with, he was two years above me. i was over at the aforementioned friend’s house, and knowing that his house was just right across the street and thinking about how i had just ended things with a guy from our old school i decided, hey why not, let me hit up musical boy. and honestly it went pretty well. we chatted a lot, nothing too in depth. to be quite honest, i do not know if he knows that we went to school together and that’s why i added him or if he was just like “oh cute girl let’s chat” and that’s a big fear of mine is if he doesn’t know… but anyway. we hit it off pretty well, talked a lot, however he goes to university in nova scotia so… not ideal for like going out and doing stuff. but a few months later… he ghosted me like i ghosted him. irony or smth! tbf he left me on delivered but it was for 42 weeks so…

and that brings us to now! i had a dream with him in it recently, quite honestly for no reason i hadn’t talked to or thought about him in months but there he was. and in the dream, i was going to snap him. well i told my friends about the dream and again the aforementioned friend said “well it’s a good thing you didn’t snap him” and when you say something like that to me, well now i can’t just not snap him. so i replied back saying “okay but… what if i did snap him?”. i was expecting a huge resounding no from my friends as that’s what they usually say when i want to talk to guys, however that’s usually about shitty guys and to my surprise, my most responsible friend replied back with “yeah you should go for it. i mean what’s the worst that could happen?” and that’s exactly what i was thinking! i never see him on social media, odds are, i’m gonna stay on delivered and then i know and it’s fine. it’s better to know even if it sucks than to wonder forever.

so i snap him. just a cute pic with a “heyy :)”. and i expect three outcomes. 1. he doesn’t reply. 2. he replies but he has a girlfriend. 3. he replies and says “hey wsp”. well i get a snap from him, and i prepare myself to answer his “wsp” with “just bored, we haven’t talked in a while”. but what do i see when i open his snap? “heyy leea, long time no talk, kinda missed it” with a pic of him getting ready for bed, shirtless, with a smirk on his face. HELLO???? THIS WAS NOT ONE OF MY THREE OUTCOMES???? i never ever expected this, i screamed for a minute, quickly grabbed my brothers phone to take a picture of the snap, and then screamed for another minute. i did reply with a “heyy i kinda missed it too lol, how are u?” currently i’m on delivered which i expected, it took him 4 days to even send me the first snap lol. but HOLY SHIT. like…. i genuinely did not expect this. for some reason him saying my name added to it all, like he remembers me? idk i honestly expected him to not really remember me. and he says “kinda missed it” HELLO???? HE MISSED TALKING TO ME???? i am interpreting it as “i missed it” because that sounds too forward to say so you say “i kinda missed it” to not sound too into the other person (at least that’s why i said i kinda missed it instead of i missed it when i replied to him). LIKE. OH MY GOD. HE DID NOT HAVE TO RESPOND LIKE THAT?? he could’ve literally said “wsp” and that’s entirely what i was expecting but NO!! HE HITS ME WITH MY NAME. AND SAYING HE MISSED TALKING TO ME. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

anyway there’s my entire relationship with that guy, i pray there will be more updates.

#musical boy #leea.loves #leea.txt

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its-me-im-coraline · 3 years

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Temporary Bliss // Damiano David // Playlist series

words // 1441

warnings // lots of angst fuck, mentions of sex

pairing // Damiano David x GN!Reader

author's note // here's my taglist, add your name loves. this took a while till i finally made it but now that i did i feel kind of proud haha

requested // yes, here

summary // Damiano and reader have a friends with benefits relationship but Damiano has caught feelings. This is what happens when one of them denies the truth.

2.15 AM, Saturday

The clock had struck quarter past two, yet one more night the two were entangled in sheets, hands all over each other and bodies united. Damiano was kissing up and down their body with so much adoration. Soft kisses around the neck and that one very specific spot behind their ear, soft caresses of the waist and chaste kisses all over those lips; those wonderful lips Damiano was dreaming of asleep and awake alike.

They had come over again in one of those infamous “late night emergencies”, all too eager to be assisted by Y/N. Truth be told the man had feelings. It had taken him a while to understand but he had caught feelings for the wonderful person; for his nightly endeavour. It was not part of the plan, not a part of the agreement they had. Well, technically there was no agreement, they never specified a thing.

In that moment he found himself on his knees, hands roaming Y/N's body as his lips traveled all over their legs, dangerously close to where they wanted him most, and man did he want it too. His kisses were sloppy hands rough while touching their body. "You taste like heaven," he commented while finally giving some pleasure.

"Mhm, I know. You tell me that a lot, " they responded, a taunting smirk on their face.

The man was utterly fucked at these words. He knew he should not be doing this any more, he knew that very well, but being here with them was an addiction; an addiction worse than nicotine and drugs. No escape, no way out -at least not an easy one. Thus Damiano continued his moves, fucking them with all he had in him, taking his frustrations out just like they did.

“That was fucking amazing,” Y/N would say every time, this time being no exception. They meant what they said, and it’s what drove Damiano back again and again and again… All in hopes that one day the feelings he had would be reciprocated.

He was not even sure when these feelings began. Somewhere between the four to six month mark of this whole situationship. That’s when he noticed, that is. He was sitting there, watching them get dressed -it was the very rare occasion that they had stayed over- just so calm, so soft. Damiano knew then that he would not mind this being a common occurance -waking up to them in the morning.

6.26 AM, Saturday

The clock was now indicating twenty six minutes past six. Y/N decided they had overstayed their welcome, thinking the best idea was to get away from the dark room.

Clothes were scattered all around, their underwear lost somewhere in the mess, making their smooth escape all the harder. They did not want to open up the light, in fear of waking the sleeping man, and the half open blinds provided only a fragment of sun - not that there was a lot to begin with. At the time they were leaving the sun was not even fully up yet, although it was going to be soon.

Only cowards leave before the sun even rises, their friend had joked once, but maybe she was right.

Y/N was only leaving out of fear. The fear of catching feelings. Oh boo hoo you big baby. Such a great fear you got there, they’d say to themselves, but deep inside they did know how big of a fear it was. They never meant to hurt Damiano but they could not allow themselves to get hurt instead.

With a last glance towards a sleeping Damiano, Y/N walked out the room.

11.30 AM, Saturday

A yawn was the first thing to be heard in the spacey bedroom that morning. The man had woken up by his phone going off with a call.

“What,” said the man (knowing very well who was calling him at this hour), another yawn escaping his lips.

“Good morning to you too,” joked Thomas, “get up, dolcezza. Ethan and I are coming to get you. He says he wants to do something nice for us today. If you ask me, he just got bored of his latest hook up and is now lone- hey hey don’t hit me!”

“I don’t know if I can,” he mumbled, turning around on the bed, only now realizing that it has been empty, and for some time. “Nevermind. Give me half an hour.”

“Are you ok, Damiano?” Thomas was genuinely concerned by his friend’s tone. He did not sound very eager before, but now… Now he was disappointed.

“Yes-yeah, it’s nothing,” he replied, dragging his hand down his face, “just call when you’re almost here.”

“Alright!”

He was truly hurt by the absence of his… well, they were not really something to him, but oh how he wished they were. There was no point to this dismay, and he knew, but this empty and sorrowful feeling could simply not be helped.

With that thought he got up to get ready, knowing very well his friends would not be happy if they arrived and he was not done.

12.58 AM, Monday

The same all distinctive ringtone came from Damiano’s phone, the screen lighting up. The name displayed on the screen let the man know exactly what it was about. He knew what they called for again and he was so done with it. He was going to end it once and for all.

“Hello.”

“Damiano,” they cried. Something was wrong, great, thought Damiano.

“What’s up baby,” he questioned in a moment of weakness. Damn addiction.

“I’m just not feeling alright… Can I come over?” The singer was not sure anymore… Not sure if these tears were real or fake, but he simply could not just leave them alone when they were crying. If something was really bothering him and he was not there to help when asked for it, Damiano would be beating himself up for days on end.

“Sure. Give me a bit.”

One last time, he thought and hung up.

3.23 AM, Friday

Last time this happened it was for comfort, it was a way of comforting their violent thoughts. Damiano was done with those excuses and reasons, he was done with this ordeal. Too far, he thought, it has gotten too far.

“Stop it,” he said as he answered the phone.

“What?”

“I said stop it, Y/N!” He had grown frustrated with them and their late night needs.

“I did not do anything-”

“Agh,” he groaned exasperated, “you can’t fucking see it, can you?”

This had to end, and now. He was not willing to put up with it any longer. He could not continue on this temporary bliss, he wanted something more, something stable. They either hopped on this train together or they would part ways.

“Damiano wha-”

“I can’t do this any more, Y/N,” he breathed out. “I don’t know what you are feeling here (cause you don’t ever tell me!) but I-I am in love with you. I can’t just hook up and then act that those feelings don’t exist. So, I will ask once: what are you feeling about me?” He was thorough, sharp, leaving no room for persuasion. He truly just wanted to be done with the uncertainty and the pain.

“I… I can’t do this right now, Damiano,” they said, abruptly hanging up the phone, leaving a hurt Damiano to process what just happened.

6.49 PM, Thursday

“And they just hung up?” Thomas was shocked at the revelation.

“Yeah… They didn’t say anything, just… It kind of stings,” Damiano confessed. That phone call had hurt him much more than he ever thought it would. After the call he could not sleep all night, sleep would just mock him every time he tried. He found it hard to move out of bed or do anything else. He just sat there, staring at the ceiling and attempting to figure out what had just gone down.

Yet another conversation was interrupted by Damiano’s ringtone. It had started disturbing him now - this ringtone - considering the phone calls he had gotten recently.

Unknown number. A blocked number, huh. He was unsure of whether he should answer it, but after a second he did. But as he heard the voice on the other end of the line he started regretting it.

“Damiano,” said the wavering voice. They were crying, that much he could tell.

“Y/N?” Agh, don’s show worry, Damiano, keep it together. But he knew very well that was impossible.

“I- I am sorry. Can we talk?”

tag list: @bieberhoodforever @tabi-toast @ginny-lily @moriro-da-regina @the-killer-queenie @makapaka11 @teenyweenynightghost @superchrystaldrug

playlist fics tag list: @cheese-toastie-11

#måneskin #måneskin headcanon #måneskin x reader #måneskin imagine #måneskin fanfic #playlist series #damiano david imagine #damiano david

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