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hello-nichya-here · 3 years

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Ok, so what in your opinion is the WORST mistake that the showrunners for Game of Thrones made in terms of content, either it's addition or redaction?

WARNING: Looooooong post ahead

Themes are for eighth-grade book reports

This absurd quote by one of the showrunners explains why exactly the show fell appart. They wanted to make a story... without themes. Anyone with a minimally functioning brain will tell that this is impossible because every story, even the simplest and least complicated story there ever, has a theme. Even a nihilistic story has a theme "Nothing matters". Every. Story. Has. A. Theme.

But Game Of Thrones didn't, at least not after the writers ran out of books to adapt and did their own thing. Everything every character did was no longer to build a narrative, but to essentially act as click-bait. The focus was to make people keep watching, not on making any content that was worth watching.

The first four seasons had it's problems, just like the books had it's problems, but Martin's writting was so brilliant that it managed to stay good even while being handled by absolute clowns. The moment season four ended was the moment the show stopped being an adaptation and became it's own thing - and like I explained before, said thing wasn't a story.

Shock

Both the show and the books had MANY shocking, heart-breaking and downright horrifying scenes: Daenerys being raped by Drogo; Bran being pushed out the window after accidentally seeing the queen fucking her brother; the whole deal with Craster and his daughters; the Dotrakhi destroying Mirri's village and her revenge against them and Daenerys; Ned's death; Melisandre giving birth to a shadow baby that killed Renly; The Red Wedding; Jeoffrey's death; Tyrion killing his father; Theon being tortured by Ramsay...

The difference is there were REASONS behind the shocking scenes Martin created. Even when you look at things like rape and torture scenes and threats of rape/torture - Martin used those scenes to remind us that the world he created is an EXTREMELY dangerous and downright vile place, and that the characters are never truly safe, and that there are WAY worse things than just being killed.

Dumb & Dumber on the other hand, gaves us scenes like an evil, former man of the night's watch evily making an evil speech to his fellow evil men, evily drinking whine from a human skull while nameless women were being raped in the background - but little does he know that Jon Snow, the hero, is about to wreck his shit. It takes something that could realistically happen (and that did happen in the books) and takes it up to eleven because the writers think shock is the same as quality and that the audience is SO STUPID that they need to practically make the actor jump out of the TV, grab us by the shoulders and scream "I'M EVIL! I'M THE BIG BAD! ROOT FOR THE HERO TO KILL ME!"

Pretty much every bad guy became a parody of Jeoffrey, ironically enough because the writers took Jeoffrey too seriously. He was a cruel, sadistic character, who had WAY too much power - but he was also a spoiled baby whose reply to Tyrion bitch-slapping him wasn't a threat, but "I'M TELLING MOM!" Jeoffrey worked because he was only allowed to do his thing whenever smarter, more competent characters like Tyrion and Tywin where not around, meaning his actions, while inhumane, never reached the point of no longer being believable.

The horrible things that happened to the characters no longer felt "right". For instance, Sansa had just been taken to the Eerie by Little Finger, who has a weird complex in which he sees her both as the daughter he never had with Catelyn AND as a replacement for Catelyn, and she was starting to truly be a player instead of a pawn... and then the writers realized "Oh shit, we should have not cut the Jeyne Pool/Fake Arya' plot, that was important" and forced it on Sansa, making Little Finger hand her on a silver plater to Ramsay and turning her into a victim AGAIN, this time to a man that dramatically fights his enemies without a shirt own, practically saying "come at me bro"

Compare this to Ned's beheading, or Catelyn and Rob being betrayed and killed by the Freys. These moments were shocking and downright depressing - but they were earned. The writting was on the wall for anyone to see: Ned was at the mercy of Jeoffrey, and the Starks had given the Freys, who are notoriously disloyal, a reason to resent them. These twists felt completely natural, were the only logical way for the situation the characters were in to play out, AND they had consequences to plot instead of just making the audience gasp and then being forgotten about.

Plot armor

It's kind of ironic and almost tragic that the show that became famous for killing characters later became the worst type of high-stakes series, putting the characters in situations they could NOT survive, not even if a goddamn miracle happened, and having them live anyway. What's even worse is that it happened repeatedly. If I had to see Jon Snow almost die and then survive anyway one more fucking time I was going to lose my mind.

There's no bigger proof that there were just no consequences for the "main" characters anymore than watching the second, third, and fourth episodes of season either. The first sets up that this battle against the night king and his army of undead is likely going to kill the majority of them, if they're lucky... and then in the third we see the plot armor in all of it's "glory", and then in the forth we find out that the Dotrakhi, who had ALL been killed, actually still have half the numbers they had the night before, somehow. Even red-shirts weren't dying anymore.

DORNE

This disaster needed it's own session because HOLY SHIT, it's a miracle/tragedy that everyone didn't go "Fuck it, I'm never watching another episode of this stupid show."

The Dorne plot in the books isn't perfect, but what the show did to it was so fucking bad that I'm pretty sure the writers didn't even read the Dorne chapters in the books, they just looked at a wiki, wrote down the names of a few characters and then did their own shitty thing.

In the books, Doran Martel is a clever, dangerous man, who pretends to be harmless so people will understimate him and step right into his trap. In the show, Doran Martel... died. That's it. I can't remember anything else that happened to him. Add him to the list of "Brilliant characters that became stupid due to shitty writing", I'm sure Tyrion, Varys and Little Finger will love making him company.

The sand-snakes, one of the main driving force of that plot, were all distinct characters in the books, with their personalities, goals, methods and motivations - basically they were created by a writer who knew what he is was doing. In the show they were all the same "character" who could be perfectly described by that horrible, cringy, PAINFUL line one of them (I can't even remember which) said to Bron "You want a good girl, but you need the bad pussy" (Seriously, if that actress ever kills the show-runners as revenge for having to say that, she'll be 100% justifyed in doing so)

And we cannot forget the driving force behind that unwatchable shit show: Ellaria Sand. In the books, the death of Oberyn made her believe that revenge only leads to more blood-shed. In the show, his death enraged to the point of wanting to avenge him and his family, and she did this... by killing his family. If that doesn't explain how insane and stupid this plot-line was, I don't know what will.

Hype = Character assassination

Many shows are based around the conflict between the bad guys and the good guys. Game Of Thrones is not one of these shows. Or at least it wasn't. As they ran out of ideas, the writers started mutilating every single character until they could be label as "Good" or "Bad", regardless of what felt right to the story and to the point that there was nothing left of said characters. Stannis's actor, Stephen Dillane, straight up said that the only thing he got from being on the show was money and that his character's motivations and decisions were nonsense - ironically enough, that kind of brutal honesty means that the writers had THE perfect actor play Stannis, and wasted his fucking time.

Here's a list of the characters that fell victims to this horrible fate: Catelyn Stark, Tyrion Lannister, Sansa Stark, Arya Stark, Jon Snow, Melisandre, Stannis, Jorah, Daenerys (bonus points for being mutilated into being both a generic, shitty "hero" and a generic, shitty "villain") Greyworm, Rhaegar Targaryen, Lyanna Stark...

Pretty much the only character who became more complex in the show than she was in the books was Cersei. While her book self was never just a "Generic Evil Queen", the show version of her was far more sympathetic, which made the stories she was part of interesting. Too bad the writers ran out of ideas of what to do with her after season six and just left her by the window drinking whine until Dany showed up to kill her. Which brings us to...

Why is this happening?

Cersei was seen as a threat in the last two seasons based on nothing but the things she HAD done. Her story just ended the very second season six did, but since she was still alive despite being one of the bad guys she had to die... I guess. She (and by extention Jaime) joined the list of characters that had nothing to do, but were still around: Davos, Theon, Yara, Melisandre, Bron, Sam, Gendry, Bran (the last one being SO unnecessary that he was cut from season five and no one noticed)

To combat that issue, the writers gave characters "motivations" that made no sense. For exemple: Sandor Clegane. His only reason to be in the show was so he could kill his brother. The problem was that Gregor was already dead. He was a walking corpse. There was nothing left of the abusive brother Sandor once knew, meaning he had no reason to fight him, and that, to keep Sandor around, the writers should have come up something new (like the redemption that book fans have been waiting for, and that has a lot of backing evidence). You might as well have had HIM be the one to randomly fly out of nowhere and kill the night king despite having no connection to him.

And since we're talking about the night king... Arya was the one to kill him. Why? Because the writers ruined Jaime's redemption arc, meaning that the only fitting ending for him was to die with Cersei, and so Arya could not kill Cersei despite wanting to, having the ability to do, AND having heard a prophecy that said she'd "Shutting brown eyes, blue eyes, and green eyes forever", the last one being the only one she had not done AND applying to Cersei. But Dumb & Dumber admitted they had no plan for this, so now that they were at the last season, they needed to do something with it, and they retconned it to mean Arya would kill the night king...

But Arya killing him meant Jon had nothing to do, so Dany had to go mad so he could kill her. To "hint" at that, they ignored all the not at all subtle foreshadowing the previous season had of Dany and Jon having a kid, and they even showed her getting jealous that he was technically the true heir... even though that made no sense since they were going to rule together anyway, and even after Dany went full "Mad Queen" she ASKED HIM TO RULE WITH HER. But anyways, he kills her and becomes king...

Except he doesn't actually become king and him being a secret Targaryen has no effect in the plot, because Bran needed to become king so there'd be a reason for him to be alive, because his magical powers turned into a plot-device. A plot-device that wasn't used at any goddamn point. Seriously, the only thing as bad as Bran becoming king was Euron's existence - dude was THE most useless villain ever AND the worst Jeoffrey parody.

A darker story (literally)

I could not end this rant without bitching about this. What is the point of spending an ungodly amount of money on sets, costumes, make-up, special effects... and then using such poor lighting that no one can see what the fucking is going on?

Anyway, this disaster of a series was so absurd it should be used as an exemple of what NOT to do.

#asks #long post #got #game of thrones #asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #rape #violence #death

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agentrouka-blog · 4 years

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You know both Mel n Sansa both describe their hair shine like copper in torches. Do you think it meant something?

I think it must mean something, because not all kinds of red hair are described that way, only that of three people. AND it is described in suspiciously similar terms AND Sansa’s hair description is even repeated by Brienne two books later, as if to remind us. There’s a connecting theme of parents and children, revenge and fire magic.

The first person to have copper hair and an association with burning trees: Ser Addam Marbrand. He’s Lord Tywin’s capable redhead.

Tyrion's right arm was soaked with blood. "Good of you to notice, Father," he said through clenched teeth. "Might I trouble you to send for your maesters? Unless you relish the notion of having a one-armed dwarf for a son …"

An urgent shout of "Lord Tywin!" turned his father's head before he could reply. Tywin Lannister rose to his feet as Ser Addam Marbrand leapt down off his courser. The horse was lathered and bleeding from the mouth. Ser Addam dropped to one knee, a rangy man with dark copper hair that fell to his shoulders, armored in burnished bronzed steel with the fiery tree of his House etched black on his breastplate.

(AGOT, Tyrion VIII)

The next: Melisandre. Lord Stannis’ capable redhead. She sure loves burning trees, too. Her description also echoes Sansa. Tall, slender, graceful, beautiful. Only, she is not beautiful, she is red.

Her hair was not the orange or strawberry color of common red-haired men, but a deep burnished copper that shone in the light of the torches. Even her eyes were red . . . but her skin was smooth and white, unblemished, pale as cream. Slender she was, graceful, taller than most knights, with full breasts and narrow waist and a heart-shaped face. Men's eyes that once found her did not quickly look away, not even a maester's eyes. Many called her beautiful. She was not beautiful. She was red, and terrible, and red.

(ACOK, Prologue)

Here he comes again, connecting to another theme:

Ser Addam Marbrand was the first of the captains to depart, a day before the rest. He made a gallant show of it, riding a spirited red courser whose mane was the same copper color as the long hair that streamed past Ser Addam's shoulders. The horse was barded in bronze-colored trappings dyed to match the rider's cloak and emblazoned with the burning tree. Some of the castle women sobbed to see him go. Weese said he was a great horseman and sword fighter, Lord Tywin's most daring commander.

I hope he dies, Arya thought as she watched him ride out the gate, his men streaming after him in a double column. I hope they all die.

(ACOK, Arya VIII)

I hope they all die.

This is echoed in the passage of Catelyn speaking of her daughters, after getting the news about Winterfell, Rickon and Bran:

"Sansa was a lady at three, always so courteous and eager to please. She loved nothing so well as tales of knightly valor. Men would say she had my look, but she will grow into a woman far more beautiful than I ever was, you can see that. I often sent away her maid so I could brush her hair myself. She had auburn hair, lighter than mine, and so thick and soft . . . the red in it would catch the light of the torches and shine like copper.

"And Arya, well . . . Ned's visitors would oft mistake her for a stableboy if they rode into the yard unannounced. Arya was a trial, it must be said. Half a boy and half a wolf pup. Forbid her anything and it became her heart's desire. She had Ned's long face, and brown hair that always looked as though a bird had been nesting in it. I despaired of ever making a lady of her. She collected scabs as other girls collect dolls, and would say anything that came into her head. I think she must be dead too." When she said that, it felt as though a giant hand were squeezing her chest. "I want them all dead, Brienne. Theon Greyjoy first, then Jaime Lannister and Cersei and the Imp, every one, every one. But my girls . . . my girls will . . ."

(ACOK, Catelyn VII)

We pick up the theme of agrieved parents and fiery lords together:

She smiled, her long copper hair tumbling across her face. "The Lord of Light has fiery talons, Jon Snow."

Jon nodded, and turned back to the king. "Your Grace, you spoke of Val. She has asked to see Mance Rayder, to bring his son to him. It would be a . . . a kindness."

(ASOS, Jon XI)

While burning trees, Mel insists, she wants everyone alive.

The woman rose in a swirl of scarlet silk, her long copper-bright hair tumbling about her shoulders. "Swords alone cannot hold this darkness back. Only the light of the Lord can do that. Make no mistake, good sers and valiant brothers, the war we've come to fight is no petty squabble over lands and honors. Ours is a war for life itself, and should we fail the world dies with us."

(ASOS, Samwell V)

Failure is not an option.

Brienne again, remembering Catelyn’s words about her daughters.

Then she had begun to talk about her daughters. "Sansa was a little lady," she had said, "always courteous and eager to please. She loved tales of knightly valor. She will grow into a woman far more beautiful than I, you can see that. I would often brush her hair myself. She had auburn hair, thick and soft . . . the red in it would shine like copper in the light of the torches."

She had spoken of Arya too, her younger daughter, but Arya was lost, most likely dead by now. Sansa, though . . . I will find her, my lady, Brienne swore to Lady Catelyn's restless shade. I will never stop looking. I will give up my life if need be, give up my honor, give up all my dreams, but I will find her. (AFFC, Brienne II)

This, too, has me really coming around to the idea that it is Arya that Brienne will Encounter and save. It’s too deliberate, this insistence that Arya must be dead, while Mel’s description being similar to Sansa ties her copper hair to the fight in the North, and Arya’s encounter with Marbrand for her ties copper hair and burning trees to the Riverlands and the vengeance cycle.

Brienne’s quote follows the same pattern as Cat’s. Beautiful Sansa with the Melisandre hair, Arya most likely dead. Cat wants everyone to die. Brienne swear that life will prevail, she will sacrifice everything. Failure is not an option.

Will Sansa be someone else’s capable redhead advocating to fight for life?

Will Brienne turn it all around for Catelyn and Arya? Bring back her child, do her this kindness? Lead her back to the fight for life, as well?

I’m pretty sure copper itself has its own symbolic meaning in the text. It’s red hair, but mostly it is currency or Dothraki skin color or the metal of bathtubs.

Or this:

The armorer considered that a moment. "Robert was the true steel. Stannis is pure iron, black and hard and strong, yes, but brittle, the way iron gets. He'll break before he bends. And Renly, that one, he's copper, bright and shiny, pretty to look at but not worth all that much at the end of the day."

(ACOK, Jon I)

I sense some dramatic irony here. The Lord of light’s capable redhead may not be worth all that much. But we may just be surprised by the other one. The one who is not “red and terrible and red” but “far more beautiful”.

But copper has 126 uses in the novels, there’s room for more exploration.

#asoiaf #red hair #Copper hair #copper #sansa stark #melisandre #addam marbrand #catelyn tully #brienne of tarth #hair symbolism #arya stark #vengeance #Fighting for life #parenting

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argentvive · 6 years

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Jaime, Brienne, and Honor: Part 3, Oathkeeper

The previous post is here: https://argentvive.tumblr.com/post/173653207295/jaime-brienne-and-honor-part-2

The last, pivotal Jaime-Brienne interaction in A Storm of Swords comes in Jaime VIII.

The chapter opens with a scene not in the show, a meeting of Tommen’s small council. Jaime is “bored,” and his mind wanders to a practice sword-fighting session with Sir Addam Marbrand. (Versus with Bronn on the show.)

Because, in an alchemy story, you can’t have too many references to dying.

Remembering his beating--he was disarmed by Ser Addam three times--he thinks about how “cruel” was his father’s gift of a new sword, reforged from Ice,

Jaime goes to the outer ward to say farewell to Steelshanks Walton and there he meets a “skinny, hollow-eyed girl” being sent north to pose as Arya Stark and marry newly legitimized Ramsay Bolton. Jaime realizes almost at once that the girl is not Arya.

When he goes back to the White Sword Tower and reaches his bedchamber, Cersei is there. As usual, she wants something: Jaime’s support against Tywin’s plan to remove her from the council and send her back to Casterly Rock.

We have seen Jaime feel regret for some of his actions in the past, and now he expresses where he’s landed:

<I’m not ashamed of loving you, only of the things I’ve done to hide it. That boy at Winterfell . . .”>

Yes! When I watched the show, Jaime’s attempted murder of a child seemed unforgivable to me. How could there be redemption after that? But at last Jaime is saying aloud that he feels shame over what he did.

When Jaime declines to intervene with Tywin, Cersei pulls out her trump card--sex. But Jaime refuses, at first mildly--”No. .. . not here”--then forcefully.

How fitting that Jaime pushes her away with his stump; it was his maiming on the orders of Vargo Hoat that launched his slow, painful journey to the Philosopher’s Stone.

This sets off Cersei’s “rage.” She mocks and threatens him, they fight, and he asks her to leave. His next thoughts suggest this may be a final break between them.

In this moment we have an echo of the physical experience our other male protagonist has suffered--remember how long Jon Snow suffered the effects from burning his hand killing the wight attacking Lord Commander Mormont.

What does Jaime do immediately after having these thoughts of losing his entire family? He goes downstairs to order Ser Boris Blount to tell Loras “I’m ready to see her.” Meaning Brienne. His family is his past; Brienne is his future.

After a delay of “several hours”--Jaime notices this--Loras brings Brienne to the “round room” in the White Sword Tower. Again, a circle is the simplest symbol for the Philosopher’s Stone, and a round room suggests something auspicious will occur there

Remember, Brienne has been stuck in protective custody all this time. She does not talk to Maergery, talk to Jaime, meet Cersei, as on the show. But Jaime has not forgotten her. We now find out that Jaime had sent Septa Donyse to her to fit her with a new dress. Of course it is blue.

Blue is the color of the Quintessence, the Fifth Element, and an alternative color for the Philosopher’s Stone. On the show she wears the blue dress only at Joffrey’s wedding, NOT in this scene with Jaime in the White Sword Tower.

When Loras tells Jaime that he has more or less accepted that Brienne did not kill Renly, Jaime dismisses him and looks over Brienne.

So what is this, the fourth or fifth time Jaime recalls the pink dress Brienne wore at Harrenhal? I’ve lost count. But GRRM keeps having Jaime mention it because it reminds the alchemy-minded reader that Jaime and Brienne, Red and White, have already joined in a permanent Chemical Wedding.

And now Jaime notices her blue dress. And her “astonishing” blue eyes. Consciously he may still think she’s ugly--nobody could ever think that of Gwendoline Christie of course--but subconsciously he is looking at her as a woman, a woman with attractive eyes.

Jaime has already decided what he’s going to do. He tells her to “close the door and come here.”

After his compliment to her, Brienne awkwardly tries a compliment of her own, that his white cloak “becomes you.” If you want to read REALLY deeply into this, you could say that Brienne is recognizing and approving of Jaime having reached the albedo, the WHITE stage. On a shallow level, however, her comment gives us a clue that she finds Jaime physically attractive. We know that, objectively speaking, Jaime is handsome. But we won’t get a Brienne POV chapter until the next book, so her comment here provides us that insight.

She then asks him whether he truly believes she didn’t kill Renly.

<”You said I had honor . . .”>

There’s the word that will guide their relationship going forward. Jaime tells her the truth about the fake-Arya he saw with Steelshanks in the yard.

<”Why would you tell me all this, if it’s true? You are betraying your father’s secrets.”>

Brienne gets the key point--Jaime is betraying his own father, to HER. And, in his thoughts, Jaime confirms it:

Jaime is SO helpful to the alchemy reader. He tells us that Lannisters are RED. He identifies himself as a LION. I’ve written about this in detail before but the Red Lion = Sulphur, the Male Principle of the Work.

Jaime and Brienne discuss Joffrey’s murder and Tyrion’s trial. Brienne understands what he’s saying:

<Brienne looked at him. “You do not believe he did it.”

Jaime gave her a hard smile. “See, wench? We know each other too well....”>

They argue briefly about whether Sansa might have killed Joffrey.

<”There’s the stubborn stupid wench that I remember.”

She reddened. “My name is …”

“Brienne of Tarth.” Jaime sighed. “I have a gift for you.”>

And FINALLY, we get Oathkeeper, which naturally is “wrapped in folds of crimson velvet” and has rubies mounted in the hilt. The Philosopher’s Stone is red and the ruby is one of the more common symbols for it. And more--”A finger of reflected light ran red along the edge.”

Jaime gives us a very clear explanation of why he is giving the sword to Brienne.

<”There was a time that I would have given my right hand to wield a sword like that. Now it appears I have, so the blade is wasted on me. Take it.” Before she could think to refuse, he went on. “A sword so fine must bear a name. It would please me if you would call this one Oathkeeper. The blade comes with a price.”>

Cersei wants Sansa dead, and Jaime is done with doing Cersei’s bidding.

<…”I want you to find Sansa first, and get her somewhere safe. How else are the two of us going to make good our stupid vows to your precious dead Lady Catelyn?”>

Stubbornly, Brienne insists on knowing why Jaime wants to protect Sansa.

<Because Joff was no more to me than a squirt of seed in Cersei’s cunt. And because he deserved to die. “I have made kings and unmade them. Sansa Stark is my last chance for honor.”

Brienne finally takes the sword.

A common representation of the couple who have joined in the final, permanent Chemical Wedding is the rebis. Here’s the version that fits this scene--a man and a woman, sharing a body, and one sword.

(Buch der heiligen Dreifaltigkeit, c. 1410).

Brienne fully recognizes the significance of Jaime’s gift.

<...I will find the girl and keep her safe. For her lady mother’s sake. And for yours.”>

In this venture, Jaime and Brienne are one person. What she does, in saving Sansa, is done in his stead. Her actions redeem Jaime’s vow and reclaim his honor.

In the book Jaime names the sword; on the show Brienne does. But it doesn’t really matter. Both of them understand that Brienne is keeping Jaime’s oath.

There is no scene with Podrick. Brienne leaves alone. After she leaves Jaime writes a short, poignant entry into the White Book.

Jaime feels so deeply about his promise to Catelyn that he writes it into the permanent record of the Kingsguard, as a reproach to himself. And he gives Brienne the credit for his return to King’s Landing, when it was Steelshanks who brought him the final way home.

Jaime has made a choice. Honor--and Brienne--over family.

<Ser Gerold Hightower had begun his history, and Ser Barristan Selmy had continued it, but the rest Jaime Lannister would need to write for himself. He could write whatever he chose, henceforth.

Whatever he chose. . .>

Jaime has seized control of his life, at last. He will stay in the Kingsguard, as he had sworn to do, and protect Tommen as best he can, but he has severed himself from the schemes of his father and his sister.

#game of thrones meta #alchemy #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #oathkeeper #rebis #chemical wedding #a storm of swords #cersei lannister #braime #jaime x brienne #buch der heiligen dreifaltigkeit #asoiaf

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turtle-paced · 6 years

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GoT Re-Watch: Fine-Toothed Comb Edition

Ah, the end. I’m free until 2019.

Yeah, no, tune in Sunday for the most recent numbers and my proposal for what I do next.

7.07 - The Dragon and the Wolf

(2:02) The Unsullied have reappeared in the plot.

(2:24) And with a shot of Jaime looking out over their ranks, we establish that the Unsullied are now at King’s Landing. What Riverlands? What Reach? Who’s running them now? And did anyone notice hostile forces marching through?

(3:21) This is, I think, one of the worst conversations in the entire series, due to its combination of indulging a favoured actor and trying way too hard to be cynical, irreverent and witty (but overshooting two of those marks and undershooting the third, landing firmly in “juvenile” territory). “Maybe it really is all cocks in the end,” says more about the show than it does about the characters.

(4:45) Here we have a long establishing shot showing us some real nice work modelling the Red Keep, plus Euron’s navy, and the few ships Dany sent. Perfectly legitimate use of establishing shots - especially given the political situation these characters are heading into, and the purposes for which they’ve each assembled these forces. This time, the length of the shots is well justified, and we’re looking at something more attractive and interesting than a damned stone corridor.

(5:15) Yeah…the book!North has more than a million people living in it.

(6:24) Woman called bitch: 1. Note Jaime’s shocked expression as Cersei says “if something goes wrong, kill [everyone in a certain order].” I do not know why this is supposed to be surprising to him - the only thing that leaps to mind is that he’s horrified she’d order such a thing under a flag of truce with so little specification as to what “if something goes wrong” means.

(6:42) People start walking to the Dragonpit here.

(8:05) We start in earnest with the reunions here. Tyrion and Pod, this time. It’s nice that they get to see each other again and catch up.

(8:18) Look, writers. Bronn saying the word “cock” is not inherently funny. Please stop.

(8:29) Similarly, Sandor doesn’t have to swear at everyone for no reason at all to maintain his hard man cred.

(8:37) Now Sandor and Brienne get to see each other again and catch up. That’s also nice.

It’s well worth mentioning, from an adaptational perspective, how telling it is that Brienne and Sandor speak fondly and admiringly of Arya, without mentioning Sansa. This is pretty much a product of the show’s lack of interest in and understanding of Sansa’s book material - her refusal to become jaded and cynical affects Sandor deeply, but was barely adapted in the show. It did, however, preserve Sandor’s repeated speeches to Sansa in praise of cynicism. As far as the adaptation can tell, there’s no reason for someone as “badass” as show!Sandor to care about Sansa. As opposed to Arya, of course he’d like Arya, she’s a scrappy tomboy. What’s not to like?

The knock-on effect is that it was that much harder to show Sandor’s own character development. The scene where Sandor buries the farmer and his daughter did a bit of that catching-up, but not much, and it doesn’t erase the fundamental problem of Sandor returning to violence - and hence the story - after the massacre of the peaceful farming community he was living in.

(9:46) Varys chimes into Tyrion’s reunion with Bronn (another nice thing!) to remind us that Bronn works for people when he gets paid. And he hasn’t been paid.

(10:54) And they finally arrive at the Dragonpit. Weren’t those reunions nice? Wasn’t it fun? Couldn’t we have used those four minutes of screentime telling the story instead?

The plot going on here is the peace talks. If there’s tension here, it needs to be directed towards “will these talks be successful?” and “will Cersei believe us?” If we have to see four minutes of characters walking to these peace talks, the conversation on the way needs to be Tyrion sounding Bronn out over Cersei and Jaime’s current attitudes, or Jon going over what he has to say and how. Also acceptable is Jon asking Brienne how Sansa was doing (to give him a chance to react to the news Bran and Arya are at Winterfell; this is new information pertaining to several major characters), or the minor named characters talking about the wight-in-a-box. Even then, we don’t have to have conversations about conversations we’re going to have.

Tyrion, Bronn and Pod reuniting? Fanservice. Cut it. Brienne and Sandor encountering each other again? Fanservice. Cut it. You’ve got a story to tell, gentlemen, move it along.

(11:42) Especially cut it, because we’ve now spent a minute watching the first set of arrivals at the Dragonpit file into place. On top of the four minutes of useless walking to places, this kills the pace of the episode. It’s supposed to be tense waiting; by now it’s more like “get back to me when the plot starts up, ‘kay?”

(12:30) Man called cunt: 1. Sandor’s swearing again. He’s maybe a little Flanderized.

(12:34) Man called cunt: 2.

(12:37) Ahahahaha, wow. We get a good look at Cersei’s outfit here and I get to return to laughing at how terrible her costuming’s been this season. In a better show an outfit this bad would be a tip-off that Cersei’s not taking this at all seriously. In this show, well. The outfit’s too plain to make a point of Cersei’s wealth and power, and too fancy to make a point of its plainness. I’ll get back to costuming again once Dany shows up.

In the meantime, say hi to Euron! He’s back!

(13:23) After another minute and a half, we’ve got the second party to arrive seated. Chop chop. We don’t have all day if we’re going to get through some plot here.

(13:32) Sandor’s really being highlighted here. We have several characters with established tension, and it’s Sandor who marches across the stage to confront Gregor. I worry that we’re going to get Cleganebowl, I really do.

(14:48) Dany loses political competence here to enable future plot point, coming with two of her dragons.

(16:06) And our third and final party finally seats herself. It’s been almost ten minutes since these characters set out on the path to the Dragonpit. Nothing of interest has been said. Nothing has been done. There’s building tension, and then there’s pacing the episode badly.

Now that Dany’s here, I’m also going to point out the costuming thing that’s now super obvious. Every named character here, with the exceptions of Jaime and Varys, is wearing black. (Jaime and Varys are both wearing very dark, dull colours.) This lack of range in colour actually subtracts from the worldbuilding. Why are Tyrion and Cersei dressed as Tywin-clones? They’re just about the only people there who’ve so much as seen Tywin; there’s no point in dressing to copy him (except to make a point to the audience, what’s a fourth wall?), and these black costumes are still too blinged out to effectively do the job anyway. Why is Jon not in grey and white (not that we’ve ever seen Starks in grey and white)? Why hasn’t anyone got Davos something a bit less shabby to wear? Did all of these people join the Night’s Watch when I wasn’t looking?

Little things - bits of jewellery, chasing on armour, and so forth - have all the house symbols that should be loud and proud on clothing and conveyed through colour. Jaime’s is possibly the best costume here. Check the details on it. They’re nice ones.

(16:29) As if to spite us, when Tyrion starts talking, Euron interrupts. Dammit. We were so close to getting the episode started.

(17:10) Thank you, Jaime! Forty seconds of bad joke and explaining why the bad joke is bad. Aaaaaaargh. We know. Get a move on.

(18:26) At least this time Jon seems to have practiced his “the zombies are coming” speech.

(18:50) Dany’s first line since she apologised for rocking up late. She’s barely had a reaction shot. It’s pretty much what happened in her meeting with Theon and Yara at the end of s6; Dany’s been shoved into the background so that Tyrion can take centre stage (because his own plot vanished into the ether and all he’s got to do is speak for Dany in political situations). Seriously, she doesn’t have to speak all the time - you just have to keep checking in with her visually so we know she’s got opinions and those opinions are important!

(19:18) Cersei calls someone else a usurper. Um.

Note again that Dany hasn’t made an argument. She’s confirming things and restating them. The work of the appeal, for her faction, is left to Tyrion. Jon Snow gets to speak for himself.

(19:28) On perfect dramatic cue, Sandor emerges from the basement here with the wight-in-a-box.

(19:50) We watch Sandor carry it to centre stage and start unboxing it. It’s a slow roll within a slow roll. It’s a slow roulade. A turducken of unnecessarily dragged out dramatic moments. I have died, and I am in pacing hell.

(20:33) Oh it’s a wight in the box! Wow, that only took a FULL MINUTE.

(20:43) Great reaction times here. That wight covered some distance.

(21:21) Qyburn’s reactions here are excellent. This is well done.

(21:39) Davos Seaworth, brought along to light a torch for Jon. Jon, meanwhile, handles this like an airline safety demonstration. While I love ADWD-timeframe Jon’s boring-but-practical attitude, this is pretty comical.

(22:12) Deaths: 1. Jon kills a wight. Still trying to catch up to Dany.

(22:38) At last! Dany contributes! Took her long enough!

(22:44) Again, something genuinely good - we can tell that Jaime is convinced, no tricks. He’s had the reaction shots to show this, and he’s asking follow-up questions. (Dany being able to estimate numbers is a good way of showing her competence and interest in the matter.)

(23:03) “Can they swim?” Interesting question there, Euron…

(23:24) “This is the only thing I’ve ever seen that terrifies me.” At first I thought this was both bad acting and bad writing (show, don’t tell!). Now we know that Cersei had plans within plans going and this is aaaaaaallll just a ruse to get Euron clear to ferry the Golden Company across the Narrow Sea.

(23:49) And that was Euron, everyone! He sure did add a lot to the season. Most of it comedic. Unintentionally comedic.

(24:04) Here’s something that again, in a better show, I would like a lot - Cersei starts monologuing in pretty much the same words as Jon and Tyrion. In a better show, I’d have the trust that this was Cersei deliberately reflecting back what she knows the others want to hear, deliberately mimicking their rhetorical devices. In this one, I’ve got nothing more than that the general intention of the scene was “Cersei convinces the others she believes the threat is real.” There have been too many clunky speeches for what looks like it could have been an effective idea to work.

(24:51) “I ask it only of Ned Stark’s son.” This is closer to the sort of irony that the books give us with Jon and Ned. The emphasis is on Ned, and what Jon is not.

(25:22) I have the strong suspicion that Jon swearing allegiance to Dany last episode was done first and foremost to break negotiations down right now. I’ll be interested to see how it plays out next season, combined with the inevitable internal R+L=J reveal.

(26:16) Wait what? Brienne said what? Brienne of Tarth? “Fuck loyalty”? Are we looking at the same character here? Full line’s worth examining, too. “This goes beyond houses and honour and oaths.” Only realpolitik can confront the army of the dead, in Game of Thrones, and honour is an obstacle.

(27:28) Surprisingly, Jon Snow actually advances a good argument for honesty! Which, much like his position on amnesty back in 7.01, is rather undercut by the action this argument was paired with. Not much good having these arguments if everyone around him is going “yes, Jon, but that was daft.”

(27:49) Here’s one of the best examples of what I’ve been talking about. We’ve only got one chance, Tyrion says. He goes to talk to Cersei alone. And yet, in order to maintain the plot the showrunners want to write, Tyrion can’t succeed. Just like with the Masters in Meereen, just like with Jaime ditching Casterly Rock earlier, Tyrion’s plan fails. I’ve got no faith that the showrunners are going to start pointing this out and have people’s opinions of Tyrion change for the worse because of this track record of failure. Yet if Tyrion doesn’t do this, he doesn’t have anything to do.

(28:11) “Or we all go home and we’re right back where we started.” Which is a huge failing of this plot. After six and a half episodes of war, very little has been accomplished vis-a-vis Dany and Cersei.

(28:22) Tyrion starts walking here.

(28:40) Cut to Tyrion in the Red Keep here. But it wasn’t just Tyrion walking. We had reaction shots to Tyrion walking. Totally worth eighteen seconds.

(28:48) And eight seconds of just Tyrion’s face before we see that he’s walking next to Gregor Clegane. I could just cry. Please, please, get to the story.

(28:59) Cut to Tyrion turning the corner of this corridor. Thrilling action! Stunning development!

(29:52) After a brief stop for Tyrion to do some nonsense like ‘converse with his brother, whom he loves yet knows he must oppose,’ we get yet more shots of Tyrion walking!

(30:16) Tyrion finally makes it into the same room as Cersei here. In terms of scene-setting, we saw that Tyrion was nervous because Gregor Clegane escorted him part of the way. In terms of new information, we learned that Cersei and Jaime argued until she kicked him out of the office.

Here’s a thought. Maybe we could have had about eight seconds of Tyrion being escorted by Gregor Clegane and nervous on account of this and its implications, and actually see Jaime get kicked out of the office by a furious Cersei? Rather than burn almost two minutes watching Tyrion walk a hundred metres?

(30:43) Woman called whore: 1.

(30:48) Woman called whore: 2.

(31:42) Again we see that it’s the loss of Tywin that caused the fall of the Lannisters in show-verse, as opposed to Lannister actions creating their own enemies and removing all incentive to make peace. True, this is out of Cersei’s mouth, and Cersei’s not reliable, but we have corroboration in the structure of the story elsewhere. To me it looks like this is supposed to be a moment where the stopped clock is right.

(33:04) Tyrion drinks: 1.

(34:02) Tyrion drinks: 2.

(34:38) We’ve changed topics a bit here, into “why is Tyrion working for Dany.” He believes she’s going to make the world a better place.

(34:47) And the example of Dany’s good governance he gives Cersei is that Dany chose him as an advisor. That’s…that’s some ego. Worse, the dynamic Tyrion asserts the existence of, that he checks her worst impulses, has not been in shown. We have instead seen Dany acting against Tyrion’s advice (at least once because she quite reasonably believed that he advised her badly), but often in a way that makes him very concerned that she’ll turn out to be a tyrant after all.

(34:56) Cersei subtly puts her hand on her stomach there. Plans within plans.

(35:38) End scene! So. What did that scene actually accomplish? Tyrion was sent there to convince Cersei to give them the truce. We did not see these characters discuss the truce. They barely discussed the meeting. Instead, they hashed out events of past seasons. They talked about events the audience was there for and emotions the audience knows haven’t changed. At most, the scene got Tyrion and Cersei to a place where they could talk about the truce. But what we did not see was any talking about the truce.

More in just a second. Or a few minutes. That will no doubt feel like hours.

(37:22) After a bit more stuff about the Dragonpit, Dany tells Jon that she can’t have children, and he questions it. Again I get this weird foreshadowing feeling, knowing that later this episode this character will be having consensual PiV sex. Though at least this information flowed from the conversation preceding it; it wasn’t quite “by the way, have I mentioned I’m infertile?” “Have you thought that maybe you might not be infertile?” It seems more like the conversation as a whole was engineered to get to a point where Dany could mention this fact a bit more naturally.

We’ll see.

(37:59) “I can’t forget what I saw north of the Wall, and I can’t pretend that Cersei won’t take back half the country the moment I march north.” Yes, that is the basic dilemma we knew existed right from the start of the episode, isn’t it? Stop repeating yourselves and move on to new plans!

(39:12) Cersei declares that she will march north with the others and fight the White Walkers. This after an offscreen discussion with Tyrion. If this solved their problems, it was a bad idea to have their problems solved offscreen. If this is a trick, it was a bad idea to put this offscreen, because it involves a character we’re supposed to believe is intelligent and perceptive being totally fooled by someone he knows very well, yet doesn’t trust. This plot point determines whether there’s a united front or whether the good guys are set up for a nice backstab - you have to show us things this important.

(40:08) “He never asked for my opinion, why would he start now?” We meant to do it! We definitely didn’t screw up the latter half of season six with characters artificially not telling each other important things! That aside, a lot of those communication difficulties were on Sansa. She failed to share important information that people in her situation would be expected to share, and when Jon did ask for her advice and assistance, she lied to him. Not for good or well-written reasons mind you, but she did. Repeatedly stating that s6 communications problems were Jon’s fault does not actually make them Jon’s fault.

(40:33) Finally, someone mentions that a political marriage between Jon and Dany might not be a bad idea.

(41:30) Relax, Sansa! We never saw Arya on an assassination mission she didn’t screw up big time.

The scripting for Littlefinger has been adequate, so far this scene, which cannot be said for earlier conversations between the two. It’s possible to tell where he’s going for manipulation in order to promote Sansa at Jon’s expense, but he hasn’t overplayed his hand much in this particular conversation. Sansa doesn’t look like a total fool for not picking up on this. Right up until…

(41:46) …this moment. “Sometimes, when I try to understand a person’s motives, I play a little game.” This, this is past obvious and past on-the-nose. The only way Littlefinger could get more blatant is if he said, “you should really consider killing your sister and claiming the Northern throne, Sansa.” This is not a situation like in ACoK where Tyrion knew Littlefinger was bad news, and just thought he was slightly less bad news than everything else he had to deal with. This is a situation where Sansa has free rein to do what she likes to Littlefinger, as we’ll see.

The fact that she does not immediately pick up on something so obvious, after several seasons of dealing with more subtle people and armed with the knowledge Littlefinger is untrustworthy, is one of those things that makes it hard to believe this character is supposed to be intelligent, in spite of what other characters say elsewhere. We’re told she’s smart and frequently shown she’s not. We see stand-alone scenes depicting her intelligence, but otherwise her smarts aren’t worked into the plot. This is because the showrunners don’t seem to believe she’s smart in the first place. They’re trying to write against their beliefs and the cracks show.

(42:51) Goddammit! That letter Sansa wrote was proof of life. It’s not proof of anything else. Definitely not of her treachery. Which doesn’t exist.

(43:33) The writers spit in our collective faces by writing a logistics scene.

(44:15) And spit again by having Jon actually consider the political messages he’s sending.

(45:03) Huh, my bad. Davos was wearing dark green. Over black, of course, so he’s not totally off the hook for the mass Night’s Watch-joining.

(45:18) Yes. We know Jon could have lied to Cersei. It wasn’t that long ago. We saw it. We don’t need Theon to tell anyone, much less Jon himself.

(45:29) And we know why Jon didn’t lie. You’re not even paraphrasing previous episodes now, you’re repeating conversations from earlier this episode!

(46:05) Congratulations you have character arcs please continue the actual story

(46:41) “It always seemed like there was this impossible choice I had to make. Stark or Greyjoy.” Like an author was scripting events out to examine the meaning of family and displacement through my experiences. Like I was a character in a popular TV adaptation of a novel series, and then the writers got lazy and decided to make me recite my central dramatic tension for the class, just in case someone hadn’t understood the point of most of the scenes I was in.

Even Alfie Allen can’t save this.

(47:00) Recapping season two is not progress!

(47:15) Then Jon tells Theon that Ned’s a part of them both, because we hadn’t had enough obvious rammed down our throats.

(47:52) Now that the closest thing Westeros has to Jesus has forgiven Theon of what sins he can and told him the endpoint of his character development, can we please get back to the story?

(48:05) “When I was Ramsay’s prisoner, Yara tried to save me.” Now we’re going over season three. We are all in pacing hell.

(49:26) “She’s your sister, and you left her to die.” This fundamental position is one the narrative never challenges - the equation of a PTSD episode in the middle of a fight with a conscious, deliberate choice to abandon Yara out of cowardice. If it was the latter instead of the former, the shot selection and acting at the time did not convey this. It’s a profound difference. “Would have tried to help Yara but couldn’t,” versus “could have tried to help Yara but wouldn’t.” And yes, this is the narrative speaking, not the Ironborn who can’t be expected to know about PTSD. Theon’s “abandonment” of Yara is the event he has to overcome in this season. If it was the characters speaking, the narrative would be Theon grappling with the fact that despite what his society tells him, there was nothing he could have done.

That’s setting aside the fact that really, what was Theon supposed to do there? Euron already had a knife right at Yara’s throat. If Theon had moved towards them, Euron would have killed her. Even if Theon had been thinking clearly, jumping over the side may well have been the best call.

I’m also quite uneasy with the fact that Yara’s been captured to give Theon something to do going forwards. I’m hoping Yara’s more than a MacGuffin in this storyline.

(51:31) Theon is kneed in the crotch. Surprise! It doesn’t work. Just like Jaime stopped a sword with his golden hand back in season five. I’m not sure I can unpack everything going on here - but let’s just say that a knee to the crotch hurts no matter what you’ve got down there (and we saw that in the Brienne vs Sandor fight, where Brienne realistically screamed in pain when Sandor kicked her between the legs). In Theon’s case, scar tissue can be very sensitive. The writers still aren’t actually thinking about what Theon’s mutilation means beyond “hur hur, no penis.”

(51:48) It’s also quite upsetting that the narrative says that Theon proves his courage through physical violence. Another part of a greater pattern - this season alone has already told us that Sansa was a coward for being held hostage. We can see this through the fact that Theon getting up after being told to stay down doesn’t get the lingering shots - it’s Theon withstanding a knee to the crotch and then beating the guy up that’s the climax of the scene. In other words, the scene conveys that Theon hasn’t done anything worthwhile until he’s actually won the fight.

(52:00) I’m not sure if this guy is dead. I don’t think so.

(54:03) Urrrgh, I can’t mention enough that I hate Maisie Williams’ direction this season. It’s just so goddamned smug. She’s capable of more and better, and we get this instead, because she’s “badass” now.

(54:19) It’s clever because every line here applies to Littlefinger better than Arya. Bait aaaaand…

(54:46) …switch.

(55:00) Littlefinger every bit as confused as the audience, I see. I wouldn’t have thought the writers wanted the audience asking the same questions as Littlefinger in relation to what’s going on. Maybe they should have considered writing a scene or two where the Starks worked out what was going on, and made the focus of the storyline managing to corner Littlefinger into a confession?

(55:25) Ah, the murder of Lysa Arryn. The first time that Littlefinger was arbitrarily gagged and rendered neither able to plan for contingencies nor improvise despite demonstrated skill in both areas. Also should be raising questions amongst the Valemen why Sansa testified so emotionally to the contrary back in season four.

It’s worse than Littlefinger just being gagged - he outright confesses to this one. Further note that Sansa provides no evidence, not even mentioning that she saw him do it, nor giving him the opportunity to respond to her assertion that he murdered Lysa to gain power in the Vale. I know showing a real trial wouldn’t be much fun here, but we’re already skimping on basic fairness.

(55:34) Sansa pulls out the fact that Littlefinger conspired with Lysa to murder Jon Arryn.

(55:58) Then Sansa elaborates on the consequences. This is bad, bad storytelling. Jon Arryn’s murder kicked off the political plot. Sansa (and Arya, and Bran) lost their parents and two brothers as a result of the war this started. We didn’t see them learn this. We didn’t see them react to this. The Starks are the heart of this story, and we didn’t see the survivors learn who bears so much responsibility for their misfortunes. We didn’t see how they learned it. We just see that they did.

The priority in this scene is not the long game - the fall and rise of House Stark. That can only be done through developing Sansa, Arya, and Bran, showing their individual journeys before bringing them back together, each contributing their talents to rebuild their home and family. This is very nearly a seven-season internal mystery, touching most of the main characters! It deserved reactions! Especially when the people affected discovered what happened! Instead it’s just brought out to get rid of Littlefinger, with no foreshadowing or development so it remains “shocking.”

Continue to note that Littlefinger denies things and Sansa just rolls on.

(56:04) The lack of reaction-to-information becomes worse as Sansa reveals that they know Littlefinger conspired to betray Ned. They found out who’s responsible for their dad’s death and didn’t get a reaction shot. Didn’t get a scene.

(56:23) When Littlefinger brings up this whole lack of evidence thing, Bran brings up his visions. The audience knows they’re credible, certain people believe them to be credible (including Sansa), but why should anyone else put any stock in them?

It’s fine if the pressure of the situation makes Littlefinger crack and betray himself even in the absence of hard evidence, that could be a tense and exciting scene. But one of the things that makes him such a dangerous opponent, a worthy endgame villain, is that this is a damned hard thing to do. In ACoK, Tyrion told him he was looking into Jon Arryn’s true murderer - and all Littlefinger said was “Jon Arryn’s true killer? I confess, you make me curious.” Show!Littlefinger’s crumpling like soggy newspaper. There’s got to be some fight to this.

(56:42) So…if that really is Littlefinger’s knife, does that mean Littlefinger tried to kill Bran? That makes no sense whatsoever (as he would have had to have learned not just that Bran fell, but also the circumstances in which he did), and is pretty hard on logistics besides.

(56:59) This scene does give Aiden Gillen the chance to prove that yes, he can act. Another person whose direction has been pretty atrocious really.

(57:19) Littlefinger’s master plan revealed! He was trying to sow strife in the Stark family. Man, did his plans ever get smaller scale throughout the series.

(57:32) “I’m a slow learner, it’s true.” Oh, fuck off. Not content with just plain old character bashing, they now have a character bash herself. This is what I mean by the writers truly believing that Sansa isn’t clever. Incidentally, you know what was cut from this storyline? Scenes where Sansa actually worked things out.

(57:38) Littlefinger asks for a chance to defend himself. He outright points out that this is a kangaroo court. Held by the nominal heroes. If the heroes don’t have enough evidence to get him nor the wits to trick him into providing that evidence himself and instead have to rely on corruption to do away with an enemy...I don’t end up thinking highly of the story.

(57:51) I do like Royce refusing Littlefinger’s authority as Lord Protector of the Vale.

(58:28) Also that Sansa’s crying.

(58:30) So now that we’re done reading out the charges and detailing the allegations against Littlefinger, when’s the trial going to be? There are clearly some questions of fact in dispute here -

(58:35) Or not.

This setting is not big on justice. Bullshit trials have featured throughout the series. I would not be complaining about this one being bullshit were it not for three things. First, the people we’ve seen running bullshit trials thus far are the bad guys. That’s literally one of the things that makes the bad guys bad guys, they run unfair trials, and people can’t get fair hearings in them! It is on our heroes to be better than Lysa Arryn and Tywin Lannister even when dealing with the guilty. Second, Sansa literally just tried to pass this off as justice - after denying Littlefinger all rights to defend himself. No evidence, no right of reply, no opportunity to ask for trial by combat. Nothing. Some justice that was. Finally, the series proper opens with an execution and a goddamned discussion on how they should be fair and contain a semblance of due process, even when the facts are as manifestly apparent as the case of a Night’s Watch deserter! This is not a good fantasy series to be fucking up your discussions of justice in!

That said, I do still think it’s clear that Sansa did the bit where she looked into Littlefinger’s eyes, heard his final words, and still knew that he deserved to die. She was not hiding from her responsibility in sentencing Littlefinger.

One more thing I do honestly like: even with his throat cut, Littlefinger keeps trying to talk. Deaths: 2. At Sansa’s behest, Arya kills Littlefinger.

What an anti-climax.

(59:39) “What are you doing?” “Preparing the expedition north.” And for that, Cersei calls him stupid. What a fool, thinking that because Cersei pledged in public to march north and never informed the commander of her armies otherwise, that she was planning to march north!

(1:01:17) This is a novel variation on the “you do know we’re in a dire situation, right, Cersei?” “yes, but we have the writers on our side, Jaime” conversation these two have been having over the course of the season.

(1:01:41) Just pointing out again that Dany made a rookie mistake in bringing two of her dragons and succeeded only in tipping Cersei off that one got killed.

(1:02:06) These armies just keep coming out of nowhere for Cersei, purely to keep her as a conventional threat. This plot has not progressed. We started this season with Cersei under threat from all sides, but with an army at her disposal; we end this season with Cersei under threat from all sides, and an army at her disposal. All the battles have been wasting time until Jaime breaks up with her. The development here has been in Jaime and Cersei’s relationship alone.

(1:03:03) I think the idea here is that Jaime breaks up with Cersei for two reasons - one, she doesn’t trust him as he trusts her, and two, she’s telling him to break an oath. The former’s fine, but seriously, most of Jaime’s relationship with Cersei was breaking oaths. The writers passed up the logical reasons for Jaime and Cersei to break up and stuck themselves with less logical ones.

(1:04:07) Favourite scene of the episode by a mile. Jaime in plain clothes, riding away from King’s Landing as it starts to snow.

(1:05:41) Sam and Gilly make it to Winterfell. Seems the Kingsroad is fine to travel. Never mind the armies.

(1:06:14) Huh, that’s funny, robo-Bran doesn’t seem to have trouble saying nice things to Sam like he had trouble being kind to Sansa and Meera.

(1:07:02) Sam came to Winterfell to help Jon fight against the dead. So, does that mean he’s deserting the Night’s Watch? Or have the writers just forgotten that the Night’s Watch is a thing?

Actually, considering all the black people are wearing, maybe everyone really did join the Night’s Watch, and when everyone is in the Night’s Watch, nobody is.

(1:07:20) Apropos of nothing, Bran says “Jon needs to know the truth” and gives us all the exposition. It’s…a bit graceless. Pretty much what the word “infodump” describes actually. Combined with the fact that Bran isn’t emoting over the fact that his dad lied to everyone for years, it makes it hard to see why this is an emotional bombshell as well as a plot one.

(1:07:44) Bran asserts that since Jon was born in Dorne, his surname is Sand.

(1:07:58) Sam hits us with the other part of the exposition! Jon is (*gasp*) actually legitimate!

(1:08:34) “Robert’s Rebellion was built on a lie.” No it wasn’t. Rhaegar’s apparent abduction of Lyanna was only one cause.

(1:08:53) “He loved her. And she loved him.” First, Lyanna going with Rhaegar willingly doesn’t mean she stayed willingly once Aerys murdered her father and eldest brother, and Rhaegar left to fight against her family. (Also, I sincerely hope that show!Lyanna is a bit older than fifteen. That is an improvement the show could easily make.) Second, ohhhhhh boy does this ever erase Elia from the narrative. Rhaegar was married. He had kids. Even if he didn’t love them, he had responsibilities to them. In his situation, abandoning those responsibilities was damaging and dangerous to those human beings. How romantic is this, when an innocent woman and two innocent children suffered for Rhaegar’s decisions? Just because they’re in love doesn’t mean everyone else in the world ceases to exist -

- Oh, wait. Sam and Gilly. I forgot. Don’t mind me then.

Third, I know the show’s done plenty of incest normalisation with “you can’t choose who you love,” but seriously why cut to Jon Snow going to Dany’s bedroom just as it’s exposited that they’re aunt and nephew? Is that really what you want the audience to have on their minds?

(1:09:16) Epic love story you two, but perhaps consider smiling at each other? So we can see you make each other happy?

(1:09:24) Cut to Tyrion lurking around outside, very creepy, no possible way to tell what he’s thinking from what’s shown here.

(1:09:35) Bran asserts that Jon’s real name is Aegon Targaryen.

This is ridiculous. If Rhaegar wanted to name Jon “Aegon,” he made this plan when his first son Aegon was still alive (on account of the fact he predeceased his children). If Lyanna wanted to name Jon “Aegon,” that means she was still on board with her relationship with Rhaegar, not giving a fuck about her father and brothers.

The other reason it’s ridiculous is because Jon Snow’s real name is Jon Snow. Jon is the name Ned, Jon’s father, gave to him. Ned picked it to honour someone he loved very much, which in turn shows his love for Jon. The “Snow” part Ned didn’t pick so directly, but he went with that rather than Sand because Jon is Northern. Like his family. Jon grew up with that name. He answers to it. Everyone knows him by that name. It’s his real name.

Also, there’s nothing inherently special about being named Aegon Targaryen. Jon Snow can save the day just as well with a bastard surname.

(1:09:50) Consensual sex: 1.

(1:09:59) Male butts: 1. Most definitely for the fanservice. This season has been a real refreshing change as far as the sex and nudity numbers go.

(1:10:12) “He’s never been a bastard.” Yes he has. That’s the point. Whether or not his parents were married (book or show), he’s never lived as anything but the bastard of Winterfell. (This is in pretty direct contrast to Aegon so-called Targaryen in the books, who might have been raised on a poleboat but always knew he was a prince.) He’s been a bastard the whole time, and no discovery of legitimacy can change how Jon was raised.

(1:10:18) “He’s the heir to the Iron Throne.” That’s as may be. This looks to me like it might be a point of conflict with Dany later. However! The qualities that will help Jon assist in saving the world rest first and foremost with his upbringing as Ned Stark’s (bastard) son. Which, again, is rather the point.

(1:10:28) If Tyrion hanging round Dany’s door earlier wasn’t creepy enough, what’s even creepier is that he’s still there now. Still watching. Please leave…

(1:11:11) Sansa and Arya up on the battlement having a supportive chat about what happened in the last Winterfell scene. Ah, good times, good times. Remember that time Arya threatened to murder Sansa and take her face? It was last episode! When did they make up?

The action in the last scene hinged on Sansa and Arya working together. We did not at any point see them working together. We did see death threats. Yet another important bit of character work that took place offscreen.

(1:11:31) “I never would have survived what you survived.” “You would have.” Uh. No. Again, the point. No surviving Stark would make it through what any other surviving Stark did, and it’s most apparent in the case of the sisters. Moreover, it’s not a freaking competition! You do not get points for surviving worse things!

We also see here that Sansa compliments Arya, but no compliment is given to Sansa in return. In isolation? Innocuous. In an episode where two people who know both sisters praised Arya without mentioning Sansa once? Less innocuous. Combined with off-air statements about Arya always being tough and shrewd while Sansa had to work for it? Downright suspicious.

(1:12:21) Quoting Ned about the need to work together would be so much more heartwarming if these two hadn’t only been working together offscreen, and the writers hadn’t well and truly established a pattern of all these siblings being utter dicks to one another for no good reason! I think Arya and Bran are the only two who’ve spent any time together recently who haven’t had dire communication issues.

(1:13:19) Good use of Bran’s crows to go to some nice establishing shots at Eastwatch. I wonder what’s going to happen here.

(1:14:21) And some nice shots of the army of the dead at last starting their advance on the Wall. Longer shots definitely justified here, since we’ve been working up to this from episode one.

(1:15:04) Three horn blasts is for wights - nice job with the homework, writers!

(1:15:42) The other half of why we just had to go North of the Wall. Needed to kill a dragon…and raise it as a wight. Well, if you edit out the horn that will bring down the Wall…

(1:16:35-37) Deaths: 3, 4, 5, 6. A few people fall from the Wall.

(1:16:41) Deaths: 7, 8, 9. A few more.

(1:16:57) Deaths: 10, 11. Two more.

(1:17:08) Nice shots of the Wall coming down thanks to wight-Viserion’s fire.

(1:17:42) And likewise, nice shots of the army of the dead moving through the breach. Not a bad way to end the season - competent visual storytelling.

Game of Numbers S07E07

Deaths: 11. Mostly people falling from the Wall, but Jon kills a wight, and Sansa and Arya team up to kill Littlefinger.

Male butts: 1. Meant to be sexy.

Female butts: 0.

Consensual sex: 1.

Rape: 0.

Woman called ‘bitch’: 1.

Man called ‘bitch’: 0.

Woman called ‘whore’: 2.

Man called ‘whore’: 0.

Woman called ‘cunt’: 0.

Man called ‘cunt’: 2.

Tyrion drinks: 2.

Cersei drinks: 0.

#anti got #fine toothed comb edition #cw: violence #in pacing hell you never get past the third circle

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