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#she's a really good writer! i drew the art
flamestar126 · 4 months
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Hey! Go check out my friend's new Howdy x Wally fanfic! She's amazing at what she does! @whycantichooseausername
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May I have this dance kiss?
Bonus under the cut!
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Look who was so bashful beforehand.
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ssavaart · 5 months
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Sometimes You Have to Make 100 BAD Drawings To Get 1 GOOD One
(Earlier this year, a publisher asked me if I'd be interested in writing a book on art. As we discussed it... they asked me to "give it a try" and this is one of two tests I did. I don't consider myself a writer, really, so this is just "in my own voice". I wound up turning down the offer... but would love to know your thoughts on this. Thanks)
Drawing something good. Something you like. It’s… elusive. Especially when you’re just starting out.
But, here’s the thing. You have good art in you. I promise. You just have to get to it and it’s stuck under a bunch of bad art. Really bad art.
When I was younger, I would draw every day. Filling up sketchbooks with doodles and sketches and I hated ALL of them.
Page 01: Crap
Page 02: Crap
Page 03: Crap
Page 04: Worse than Crap
Page 05: What even is that?
Page 06: Ugh
And it was just downhill from there…
But… somewhere around like page 100… I made something that… “wasn’t crap”. I actually didn’t hate it.
And that gave me courage to keep going. That one drawing made it all worth it. I was cured. I was now an expert. All of my art would be great from now on.
Oh… if only.
The next drawing was worse than any other drawing before it.
How??? I just made ART! like 5 minutes before that. I got all the bad drawings out! How did my art just go from Van Gogh to Van NO???
Honestly? I… got lucky. That one good drawing? Total fluke. Dumb luck. Sheer Happenstance.
Doing 100 drawings didn’t suddenly make me an expert. It couldn’t.
Have you ever heard of the saying “If a million monkeys type on a million typewriters for a million years, they’ll eventually write Shakespeare”?
I was those monkeys and that drawing was my Shakespeare.
I just pooped out enough bad art that eventually sheer luck was going to mean I may make something really good.
And I’m TOTALLY okay with that. I was 11. I’m not a prodigy. I don’t have any special gifts. But what I did have was… a taste for how making good art felt.
Seeing that one good drawing made me want more. Like my first time tasting chocolate ice cream. I was hooked.
So, I made 100 more bad drawings. Maybe more. And, guess what? ANOTHER great drawing emerged!
Another Shakespeare from this 11 year old monkey!!!! Huzzah!
From then on… I knew that all I had to do was keep banging away at that typewriter (I’m still on the million monkey thing… bear with me) and I would get rewarded with another masterpiece.
Week after week. Month after month. I would fill up my sketchbooks with the most horrific, amateurish, incomprehensible art… and, sure enough, 1 of every 100 drawings would not suck.
I would show it to my mom and she would say “Oh! That’s wonderful!” and when she tried to turn the pages to see more, I would quickly SNATCH it out of her hands and run back into the shadows like Gollum hiding his “Precious” from prying eyes.
I dare not let her see the monstrosities that came before the work of genius.
And… this went on. For years. Predictably. Rhythmically.
Until, one day… my 75th drawing was really good.
How? It was 25 drawings early! That’s not how it was supposed to work. That wasn’t the plan.
But there it was. A really amazing drawing of a spaceship I came up with out of my head. It had lasers and a cockpit and wings and…It was glorious. And it was totally unexpected.
Maybe NOW I was an expert and I no longer needed to make bad art? Would today be the day I would only make masterpieces?
I quickly turned the page and began to draw what would soon be my second greatest work of art and… NOPE.
Still crap.
Hm. But… something was different. It was still crap. But… it wasn’t as “crappy” as the other crap.
I grabbed my previous sketchbooks and looked at the bad drawings from previous years and… guess what? My older bad drawings were WORSE than my newer bad drawings!
Apparently, the more I drew… the better my BAD drawings got too.   
Okay. So. I drew 75 more “not as crappy” bad drawings and… predictably… I made another great drawing!
I was… IMPROVING.
This went on for years. I went to high school. Then art school. I hated MOST of my art… but as I practiced… the number of BAD art I had to make to get to the GOOD art got lower and lower. Soon it was 50 bad pieces for 1 good one. Then 25. Then 10.
It took decades when I noticed… I liked my art more often than not.
It was a complete surprise. I was in my 40’s when this happened. I was SO conditioned to just accept I was going to hate my art that I hadn’t noticed that I had made 5 paintings that didn’t suck. IN A ROW!!!
Unheard of!
But, there it was. 5 good paintings. One right after the other.
The 6th one was complete trash. Tossed it in the garbage.
But, the 7th one? I liked. And the 8th. And the 9th.
I’m now 54 and I know I still have SO much bad art in me. I can feel it. Always ready to pop up and ruin my day.
But, I “pooped out” so much bad art over the years that I’m not really worried about those pop up bad art surprises. I know it’s just temporary.
I like my art now. And that’s because I got MOST of the bad art out of me and into those old sketchbooks.
I know it may seem daunting doing 100 bad drawings just to get to 1 good one. But… if you love that feeling of making that one GOOD piece of art… you need to be patient and get the bad ones out. They’re blocking the good ones. Keeping them deep inside you.
So, crack open that sketchbook. Poop out those bad pieces of art and never look back.
You’ll thank me in like 40 years or so. I promise.
(Oh. And sorry for all the poop references. I’m still that 11 year old when it comes to humor)
Poop.
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lakesparkles · 9 months
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Alright.... I'm less embarrassed (a little) to show my weird crossovers - I like to call them like this. Most are just characters I like interacting just because, but I'm starting with a full AU. It's basically a swap between Reagan & Brett with Diane & PB! It's a bit silly but I created some stuff about it (I have more parts), if you want to know more about the plot, it's under the cut!
This was Instagram's original descpription, so I might repeat myself, sorry.
You may be used to my self indulgent crossover AUs by now, right!?? And this wins as the most self indulgent one so far. So I'm not sure if other people will like it, but… I do. Basically, yeah, this is Brett + Reagan / Mr Peanutbutter + Diane, but swapped! Before I say anything else I would really like to thank @/witherstorm for the original idea (it inspired me so much I drew all of these very fast!) and also @/skoshibuns and @/lazuli_drawzalot for helping on this too (I'm not really tagging to not give annoying notifications, but check all of them out!! They're amazing and have really good art!)
Okay, so back to the AU. I don't have much ideas for it so far, but with Brett and Reagan is basically an actor AU! Brett is famous for acting in a sci-fi sitcom in the 90's. Now he's still loved for his positive and sweet personality, even that, inside, he's super insecure about himself and what he does. Reagan is married to him and works as a writer in the same project Brett is now involved. But what she studied and truly wants to be is a scientist (she also thinks Brett's sitcom isn't realistic at all!!), she still wonders why she's so unhappy with her life… I didn't create much for Diane and Mr PB working at Cognito but it surely would be interesting, considering it was all created by Diane's father, who just died and she pretty much hated. Mr Peanutbutter was created by Cognito, in a project that wanted to give animals human conscience. But the problem was when they made him Diane's coworker, now both of them having to be leaders of the same team. She's offended. Even after giving all her life for that company… Isn't she enough? (I'm not sure if they'll have a romantic relationship at first, I kinda want to make him dating Pickles in the beggining, but it also seems like a bad idea) If you read all of this, I love you! As always, laptop makes colors ugly. Princess Carolyn surely looks PINK
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ccrisntok · 10 months
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requests part 3 🤯🤯
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Teruko still has the passion to fight it, while David has accepted his fate (even though Teruko could def break out of that grip if she really tried...) Thanks for the request @welpuu!! Your art is awesome!!!
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Nico didn't do anything wrong!! They just wanted to do some Ace cosplay!!! (Thank you for the request @weightedblankettt, I LOVE UR SWAP AU SM!!)
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Two very different approaches to teaching your gf how to skate <3 (Thanks for the request anon, drawing Arei in this was super hard for some reason. like her legs fucked me up. they still look weird 😭)
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two jareis in a row!! look at them. aueueueuadkjasl.love. (thanks for the request anon <33) (there was another jarei request given immediately after this but i think I'll do that one with the next batch, or as a stand-alone drawing later)
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i like the colors in this. also i don't know how to draw Syobai looking in love. old men yaoi but they hate each other. fun ship though, thanks anon ✨
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god they are my everything (i say this at every drdt ship). ahhhh these two would have been so cute. like Xander was MADE to be Terukos best boy throughout the game. why didn't they get that. they deserved it. a person whos doomed by fate and someone who fights to change fate. a person who cant help but hurt those around them and someone who wants to help everyone around them. goooodddd I'm on the floor. thank you @delightfullydiscordant.
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Swap! Acey Wacy. he is so not a good person. he's so mean. and insecure. like look at him with a hint of judgment he will have a breakdown. (this is a design from my little swap au thing btw. so is the next request) thanks @numberoneacestan for the request <33
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they mean sm to me. i feel like they aren't friends at all but Levi would die for him (and everyone else, bc. its levi. but with Teruko's chapter 1 genuine care for others.) thanks @tired-writer-in-progress for the... request? i think thats what that was? if not i drew it anyway <3
requests are open for a tiny bit longer, since schools abt to start up again where i am lol
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enidtendo64 · 9 months
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I just finished Wednesday today and I'm full on the wenclair ship!!!! so I'm glad to have seen your art just as I'm done lmao. if you read wenclair fics do you have any recommendations?
OOOOH Okay nice nice!!!
I'm so sorry this is so late but I hope you still want some recs, bc I def got some for you! I tried to keep these pretty succinct and not too many bc a lot of these are pretty long reads but these are some of my fav Wenclair fics to read and reread! I made sure to put different types/genres of fics in here too so there's a diverse list of flavors on here! Most will be complete but I'll throw in some WIPs i've been keeping an eye on!
If We Make It Through December by overnights: If you love FLUFF and Enid interacting with the Addams Fam! A wenclair STAPLE tbh, fake dating, Enid being invited to the Addams Mansion, and CHRISTMAS fic all in one! The dynamics between the Addams and Enid are always sweet, and Wednesday and Enid just teeter on that close friendship to oh, maybe it's love??? thing and it's so sweet to see. It's just very lovely and wholesome! A great execution of that 'fake dating but oops you were in love all along haha' trope!
Magus et Lupus by wigglewyrms: Ok like I had to rep one of my pals in here but in my defense this is genuinely so good and one of my favorite wenclair fics before we even became friends! It's a fun fantasy Wenclair with dialogue that's just so fun and snappy and witty! You're gonna have fun reading their conversations and then you're gonna get caught up into the world and the story! The plot is very fun and the end is a very fun payoff! I think I might have overused the word fun a lot for this fic but like that's just what this fic is--It's entertaining, it's engaging, and it makes you feel like you're having fun reading wanting to know what's next or what's this person gonna say or etc. It's a fic you read and you feel good! 100% Recommend! I even drew art for it if you're interested (which I should honestly repost on here soon)
I'd recommend their other stuff too-- Stubborn, Single Minded, and Obsessive is great if you like the slasher horror genre with a dash of Addams Family Values Lore, and their most recent one that's a WIP, When The Moon Shines Red is a very fun fic focused on Enid's werewolfisms but dangerous, with a very sweet friendship to relationship evolution between Enid and Wednesday!
i know the end by thriftedstars: If you're an angst lover like I am, you're gonna LOOOOVE this! A sort of groundhog's day type of fic, it focuses on the day of the last episode of the first season--Enid, Wednesday, Tyler, Crackstone, all that entails in that night. It's a really fun read just to know what happens next and how Enid gets out of the situation but also to see the girls' relationship grow in this terrible situation. Lots of emotion! Listen sometimes you just need the hurt for the ending to be sweeter! Recommend wholeheartedly!
curtain call by hanjisgirlfriend: on the complete opposite side of the last fic, Curtain Call is an enemies to friends to lovers Wenclair that does an amazing job of capturing that kind of high school love story kind of vibe but like also a dash of youthful nostalgia. It gives me the same vibe of like, if I was listening to the Kids album by Mac Miller--They're kids and they're friends and they're growing up and they're growing up together. I HIGHLY recommend as well, like it genuinely makes my heart lighter thinking about how sweet this is.
raven in the den, wolf in the nest by Barbara_Lazuli: So you might be familiar with the author's name--Artist, Comic maker, Writer, literally what CAN'T she do!!! This fic is another fake dating fic but a different flavor from the first one! This one really dives into both Enid and Wednesday's relationships with their mothers, as well as the building feelings they already have for each other. Their bond in this fic is nothing short of sweet and heartwarming, and I genuinely think this is one of the best fics in the tag! Just got so much substance! Also all the Addams family media references and the Loona refs-- like Barb if you read this you're a champ for making Wednesday play Sonatine and also listen to Hula Hoop and just for making this in general????? Seriously how are you so talented bro
queen of the night by heyfools: Look, a flower shop AU hits okay? And this? THIS HITS. Wednesday is an owner of a flower shop, Enid needs a job, and we know where this is going. But man the way you get to know both characters a little more--their histories, traumas, likes and dislikes and their personalities beyond "appropriately polite cowoke" (well, polite for Enid, not so much Wednesday at first) it's soooooo good! You have a journey along with the characters and you really get invested in their relationship! A great read, especially if you wanna read something like in the afternoon light with a nice lemonade maybe, or like just a very relaxing fun read!
Forged in Blood by RiseAboveTheAshes_203: Okay so this one is a HEAVY HITTER! We're getting into the big bois! It's a 100k fic about Wednesday and Enid basically dealing with the consequences of Enid becoming a blood wolf-- and bro you are seated, belted, strapped into the ride every step because PHEWWWW what a RIDE! It has really interesting lore building upon werewolf society in the show and also witchery and magic from the Addams family. And all of that is great and amazing but the real star of this is just Wednesday and Enid being Wednesday and Enid--they are DEVOTED to each other! Even if they don't quite understand the full means of it yet, and if it gets them in trouble sometimes. It's amazing to see their relationship grow and them understand what they truly mean to one another and it's a captivating love story that also happens to have fun world building for the show and amazing moments that just leave you so tense to know what happens next! I was so tuned in when this was still a WIP I remember refreshing the tag every lunch time for a while for a chapter I was HOOKED, and I'm sure you will be too!
A Kidnapping By Any Other Name by Ravenmoon33: So bear with me this is gonna be a long one; Ok! So this is the other WIP I've put in here (aside from When The Moon Shines Red) and let me tell you--this fic changed my life fr. Some TLDR lore about it tho--the version I linked above there is a revised version! They have an old version they still have up on their account and honestly I also HIGHLY recommend that version too bc it had me in bed giggling kicking my feet like ROMANCE. ROMANCE WAS MADE in these ao3 walls!!! (The flower scene???? No spoilers if you know you know but OOOOOOOOGGHHHH I would not shut up about it for WEEKS Im so sorry to my friends and my poor gf) but I also highly recommend the new version as well! If you've read the first version and are keeping up with the new version, the new things are also so good and you can tell the author is so locked in and excited with what they've added and what they've changed, I honestly recommend both;
So onto what it's actually about-- Enid is "kidnapped" by Wednesday and is "forced" to stay at her best friend's mansion for the summer. And you know what happens? LORE. So much worldbuilding on Addams family lore like it's AMAZING!!! You read about new characters the family past and what it means for Wednesday and Enid, and if that's not enough, there's also the MYSTERY aspect too because Weds and Enid will have to deep dive into that lore to figure out a problem in the present and it's so much FUN to like try to figure out how things go together! I love that aspect of both the versions so much that it's only rivaled by my immense love of how everyone's relationships are written! Enid's relationships with the other members of the Addams fam, especially Morticia, is so healing and heartwarming, and we see Wednesday's different dynamics with her family and how Enid affects her and helps her grow and you see those relationships with her family members grow because of it! And of course, the obvious, Wednesday and Enid basically having a love story for the ages cause JESUS, this is ROMANCE. Wednesday BIG FUCKING ROMANTIC Addams!!! It's amazing omg I wanna say more but I also don't bc I don't wanna spoil but I absolutely cannot rec it enough, even if it stays unfinished it will still be genuinely one of the best wenclair fics for me.
Tumultuous Waters: Wednesday Season Two by KrackenoftheDeep: So we're here at the last one. I didn't really list these fics out in specific order but I did save this specific one for last bc I genuinely think this is my favorite Wednesday fic. This is like a full ass season 2! It's a telling of how season 2 could happen, continuing from season 1 and picking up the ball the first season threw with stuff about the Morning Song cult, a deeper dive of Crackstone and Goody, more worldbuilding about the outcasts and the school, and best of all-- THE Wednesday and Enid dynamic that to me would be so fucking ideal for season 2 if Timothy Burton wasn't a COWARRD!!! /j /maybe
The growth Enid and Wednesday have in this fic, along with the exploration of the other characters, more investigations not just by Wednesday but also the other nightshade members helping and getting involved as well! You really get to feel so many things for these characters, and all of that pays off in one of the most satisfying endings for me in a fic like the author really fucking knocked this out of the park I felt like giving a standing ovation!
I genuinely don't think the Wednesday writers could like, live up to this. At least for me, it's that good. This is everything I've ever wanted for a Wednesday s2 honestly and I honestly, HONESTLY could not recommend this enough.
And after you read this, you can follow along the author's sequel to this fic, The Infinite Black Sea: Wednesday Season 3. Again, also highly recommend! A new mystery afoot!!!
I'm so sorry I didn't expect this to get super long but sometimes you just gotta give tens where tens are deserved!!! There are so many more great wenclair fics out there that deserve a reading and loving, like I know the tag can look a little scary sometimes but seriously there's some great gems there underneath all the scary stuff lol
These are just some of my personal favs, and honestly thank you to all the authors here yall are doing God's work fr!!!
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casinoroyale · 6 months
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Hi everyone!! Theseus cquackity viceduo zombur revivebur here.
This blog has seen several hiatuses (my bad seriously my bad), and bouts of irregular posting. So I'm sure people who regularly check it have noticed that we (Fiona @quackbur and I) haven't been posting daily anymore and haven't for a bit now. So below the cut I'm gonna talk more about that, and our plans for this blog going forward
For starters, I love roleplaying on this blog so much, as does my cohost Fiona @quackbur. Fiona has done so, so much writing for this and I feel kind of bad for taking her credit over the past two or so years, so props to her for being such a good sport and for everything she's done. This blog wouldn't exist without the shared passion she had for it.
To get sappy, I love the friends I've made in bedrockverse, they remain some of my best and closest companions. I would not trade the times I've spent with them for the world. Beau, Holly & co, Met & Co, and Thunderbottles are some of the loveliest, most supportive, and insanely talented people I have ever had the pleasure of writing with and meeting.
This includes people who aren't part of the bedrockverse that I've written with!! Shoutout to Javi anonymous-jey casino-duckling, TGM the-g-m duckofthelaw, and AD anonymous-dentist therealnoodleman. It was so much fun bringing all the quackverses together, and I respect all of you so much as writers.
AND that also includes EVERYONE who has interacted with her!!!!!!!!!! Everyone who has sent asks (thank you so much, sorry we're terrible at replying), reblogged threads, commented, posted/liveblogged, DREW FAN ART (BLOWS OUR MINDS. THERE'S BEEN SO MUCH INCREDIBLE ART CREATED, WE CANNOT THANK ALL OF YOU ENOUGH), even just liked a thread, thank you. Seriously, it has meant a lot to us to be part of this community, and have so many people enjoy this blog. Insert Pitbull image happy you enjoyed.
So, going forward it would make us really happy if you all pictured casinoroyale as happy. He has songbird-sunrise, goofygoop, and a nation full of citizens that she loves. She babysits for tubbolul and latenightmining, and terrorizes rp!emduo not infrequently. All we really wanted was to bring c!quackity to a happy place and I feel we've done that. Of course he still has shit days, as a ptsd baddie, but the good days are more common. And if we never get to it (though I hope someday we do, maybe in the form of a collaborative one-shot or fic) know that casinoroyale and songbird-sunrise DO eventually get [REDACTED]. And one of them DOES get [REDACTED]. That was always the plan! Yay! [REDACTED]!
Not to say that we don't have more arcs planned for this blog, because we do! I just don't know when/if/how they'll ever get written, especially because a lot of my friends have moved on from their rp blogs as well. But I really do still feel happy with where he's at and happy with everything I've done. This is a project I'm really, really proud of and I will always look back on fondly.
None of this means that I'm not interested in c!Quackity or DSMP as a whole anymore, either. Actually that couldn't be further from the truth. But now I'd like to be able to focus on fics, and other forms of writing, which I've been doing more recently :D actually, you can read a short one shot I posted for exile's anniversary HERE
If you've made it this far into this long, sappy post, THANKS!!!!!! The TLDR; this blog is on an indefinite hiatus, and won't be returning to its formal glory, and that's okay. We had a really good run. Now, off we go to other things
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cartierdreamx · 1 year
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𝕯𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖉 𝕿𝖔 𝕱𝖆𝖑𝖑 *1*
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OMG HI MY SWEET LOVES <3, I hope you’re doing well, and your week was great! I am so so so excited to share with you the first chapter of my new Mafia AU series, and I am even more excited to write it (the love you showed to FAD and my drabbles warm my heart so so much), I don’t want to reveal but because I want you to read that, but I will say both you and Jenna are 25 in this story, something about 25 just seems like the right age for this. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and if you do, please consider reblogging, following and commenting! Thank you all for your constant love and support! J <33 
If you would like to be apart of a taglist so you know when the next chapter comes out, comment down below or let me know thru asks!! 
Pairings: jenna ortega x fem! Reader 
Warnings: slight angst, slight dark themes, swearing, mentions of weapons and violence. 
This fic is STRICTLY 18+, as it involves adult themes, minors DNI, you are responsible for your own social media intake, which includes reading entertainment which this fic falls under, so one last warning- this fic is 18+. Thank you!
FYI: JENNA IS G!P IN THIS FIC!! 
~~
Words flow through you with ease, you inhaled words the same way oxygen seeps into your body, and like carbon dioxide leaving, what left instead, was art. Your art. So, journalism was destined for you, it was your calling, you would have gone into publishing but there was something about people that drew you in, and there was the fact that you lived in the Bay area, your home, well developed into your home, you moved a few years back because something in you sparked and said to move, you knew the opportunities would be great, and you proved yourself right. You found yourself working for an independent, yet big journalism company right in the heart of Silicon Valley, the tech city, right where the hearts of Google and Apple reside. They pay good money, having saved enough to rent out a loft close to work and have your own car, a black Toyota 86 with a custom spoiler and a lip kit wrapped around the body and the colour so deep and rich, Batman would be jealous. But there was one thing that was missing, rumination would fill your mind, if journalism was destined for you, why couldn’t the heart of someone be too. Love. You were missing love, what’s yours will come to you and everything happens for a reason would be a constant mantra of yours, but patience was a draining one, and love is a losing game. Not to worry, your words would keep you company and that would be enough, right?
“Y/N!” Solana calls out for you, your boss, manager, bff, mother, every occupation under the blazing sun, she’s that to you.
The corner of your mouth connects to your ears and your eyes widens as the auditory sounds hit your ear drums. You loved her with your whole heart,
“How’s my sweet girl doing?” She rushes towards you with such sass, it makes you giggle.
“Better now that you’re here.”
“Awww, I love youuuu.”
“Huh?” You giggle, extending your hand out to grab the drink she clearly bought for you, then giving her a mocking wink.
“Oh, you dickhead.” Solana exclaims as she realises your sweet confession was directed towards the ice latte.
A soft tsk leaves her mouth as she rolls her eyes at you, as she leans over your shoulders, she reads over what you’re writing. You were a talented writer, everyone wanted you and not just journalism, anything that included writing, they wanted you. But for some reason Solana’s company ‘Bayseyes’ reeled you in, it felt like second nature to you, it felt like home, electricity rooted in your fingers when your touch met with the keyboard during your trial shifts when you were a rookie, no other branch made you feel this way. And plus, you really loved how ‘Bayseyes’ wasn’t toxic, the information was fished out and you and your colleagues had high rating articles, but no negative connotation was linked to you guys unlike other journalism and tabloid companies.
“This is good y/n.”
“Aw, thank you.”
“If you worked at TMZ.”
“OKAY OUCH, if you hated it just say that smh.”
“Y/N, it’s good, but I know you to be amazing, scrap this and write a new one.”
“Okay, be honest, are you trying to murder me? I feel like a 10-inch knife has just been plunged deep into my heart, I’ll write a new one but you’re giving this story to a rookie, this is too beautiful to be deleted off this sweet universe of ours.”
“You are so dramatic you know that? Fine.” She was right, you are dramatic, but in a fun, ironic way, it’s what made people laugh and what this world needed was more laughter, as sad as it sounds, you used that same dramatics and turned it into a play when foster parents would meet you, whilst at the same time, flaunting that big heart of yours. However, fostering is easier said than done, every change of parents and every house you had to learn the layout of, was never your fault, you were so loved, but you can’t help but blame the change on you each time, if you were so loved, why didn’t you have a home. You were close once, almost about to have your forever home but problems with the system always won. Almost is never enough.
A bright, mocking smile paints you face as Solana scoffs at you, she always gave into your needs and want, but you always provided her with what she needed, in every form, so she can’t help but have a soft spot for you, giving in to your commands.
“So, what is my little rising star going to write about?”
“Hmmm royal family? The coronation, OH! There’s talk that there was a paparazzi high speed chase with Meghan and Harry.”
“Like every other journalism branch? We’re not TMZ babes, we’re better.”
Folding your arms and leaning back into your chair, suffocating Solana’s fingers, you scoff out of disappointment. Feeling Solana’s fingers squirm out from the space between your back and your chair, you swivel around to face her.
“Well, I don’t know what you want, everything has been milked.” As the words leave your tongue, you see her mouth form a smirk paired with a smug look. “Sol, what did you do?”
“Yes, everything has been milked, but not this.” You see an emerald, green paper with hints of gold flash into your eyes, the glossy material reflecting off the lights. Your lips purse inwards and your eyebrows scrunch down, if confusion ever knew your name, now was when it screamed it.
“What is that?”
“Well Ms. L/N, this, this is rarer than any diamond, pearl or ruby out there, you’ve been invited to Jenna Ortega’s annual masquerade ball.” Her smirk now turning into a cheese, a cheese so wide it was starting to creep you out.
“As in, mafia leader Jenna Ortega?”
“Yup!” She says ever so positively.
“As in, most feared women in San Francisco, HELL, maybe in America?”
“Oh well, that’s subjective.”
“NOOO, it’s fact.” An obvious annoyance paints your face as you bite the right side of your lip, knowing there was no fighting this, as much as you didn’t want to attend, you couldn’t say no to her, and plus, this invitation is so exclusive, more exclusive than the MET, which you, not to sound snobby, you’ve been to, not as a guest though, but obviously as a journalist.
“You’re going Y/N, that’s final, I’m speaking as your boss, we need this, YOU need this. No one has ever been close enough to her to get an exclusive, it’s always been assistants on top of assistants on top of body guards, I need you to work your charm.”
A big sigh escapes your mouth, your sign of submission and defeat, looks like you’re going to attend. You can’t help but feel a small strike of lightning hit your aortas though, but your pride was too big for you to ever admit that to Sol, to be fair, you can’t remember the last time you went out and enjoyed yourself, though you can’t promise you’d enjoy this ball, you can’t remember the last time you got dressed up, baddie up, just in general felt pretty about yourself. So that, and only that had you excited, oh and maybe the little fact this story could make you, Sol, and anyone under the name of the company MILLIONS.
“Okay fine, but only for work.”
“Oh sweetie, I want you to get laid too.” The same cheesey smile back plastered on her face as wide as the curve of a banana was really starting to get to you now.
“If I say fine, will you stop leering at me with that monstrous smile of yours.”
“Yes.”
“Fine.”
“Okay my smile is back to normal now, but I’m serious, thought I want you to write a global hit, I also want you to have fun, you’re 25, Jenna is 25, I want some grandbabies.”
“WOAHHHH SLOW YOUR ROLL, first of all you’re 33, no grandbabies, second of all, no! I’m not hooking up with the head of the Ortega mafia family, and definitely not getting pregnant.”
“But she’s hot.”
You throw your hands up in the air and swiftly placed your face in them once you brought your arms down.
“Just because she’s hot does not mean I’m getting pregnant.”
“AH HAH, so you agree she’s hot!”
“Okay that’s it.” You stand up and start grabbing your things, trying to shake off what Sol just insisted.
“Waitttt, where are you going?”
“Lunch, away from you.”
“NOOOO, I was kidding, okay fine, at least have lunch with me, you can try on your dress.”
“You have my dress already? Wait- when is it?” Sounding hesitant, thinking you had more time until the ball.
“Heh, tonight.”
You freeze and stop in your tracks, a million thoughts illuminating your mind, what’re you going to wear, make up, shoes, hair, hookups??? And maybe the fact that you’re going to be in a room highlighted with the word danger. Not saying that weapons would be blazing all over the room, but you felt a sense of caution attending, Jenna had enemies, it’s the mafia, without enemies are you really in the mafia. Her main enemy though was the other mafia family, the hierarchy goes Ortega and then Marcello, they were also feared but Ortega was more liked. You never liked that life, the whole mafia thing, sure it was family oriented, and they never killed anyone who didn’t deserve it, no women, no children, well Ortega anyways, Marcello ran on different values, they were ruthless, but they knew better than to cross Ortega’s lines, it was the one thing they feared, and they could never find a way to make Jenna vulnerable, Jenna would loves herself and the family too much to let herself be vulnerable. She is Bay city’s most feared and most eligible bachelorette.
“ARE YOU INSANE? THERE’S NO TIME.”
Sol cups your face and blows on you “there is plenty of time, you’re leaving early, we’re going to get lunch, then you’re going to try on your dress, you get ready, and I will do your hair and makeup, make Jenna fiend for you.”
“You have got to calm it with Jenna.”
“Yeah, whatever come on.”
~~
Back at your green infested loft, adorned with all the books, warmth, and plant babies you could ever imagine, you get Sol to place a blindfold on you so the first time you’d see the dress is when she takes off your blindfold in front of your mirror.
“Are you ready?”
“Very.”
As she takes off the blindfold, your eyes take a second to focus on your figure in the mirror, a floor length, ruby red dress drapes and cherishes every beautiful curve of yours, the high slit showcasing your leg accentuates your ass, every cinch of the corset top pushing up your ample bosom, with just enough fabric draping over your shoulders, but not enough to call them sleeves.
“Wow.” Was all you could muster up to say, shocked at how glistening your beauty was, you can’t remember the last time you felt this way about yourself.
“Wow, indeed, but honestly, you deserve more than a wow, you’ll capture everyone’s eyes, and especially Jenna’s eyes.”
You let out a soft giggle, opening your arms and taking her in, “thank you so much for this.” She was taller than you so one hand rests on your head and the other around your back and waist whilst your arms bear hugged her entire waist.
“You deserve it, love, now come on, we have to do your hair and makeup.”
~~
Stepping into Ortega towers was every bit of excitement and nervousness all at once, like you were going to throw up but instead of germs and digested food, it’d be confetti. A red carpet was rolled out for guests and paparazzi hugged both sides of walk behind golden ropes, you were a nobody, so you wanted to swift your way into the building. You couldn’t help but take in the city views even if you were at ground level, and the towering building in front of you captured every breath in your lungs, it was an architectural dream, heights reaching mountains but curves and twists and openings everywhere you looked. There were two main towers, the roots of the building curving towards each other and then straightening up with a long adjoining room, connecting one tower to the next, assuming that is where the ball is being held. And as if that wasn’t enough to impress you, there was one more adjoining room at the very top, like a princess keep at a castle, but instead of being the size of a small bathroom, it was the width of both towers and the gaps in between, you could only assume that is Jenna’s penthouse. Sources online stated that the towers was home to the Ortega family, where Jenna spent the most time, where missions and meetings were officialised, an office space for hundreds of workers, and a tactical space for hundreds more body guards and loyal subjects, and a small rumour suggests that there is an unground vault filled all the riches you could imagine, and of-course, every weapon they needed.
The blinding lights stung your eyes, but luckily it took a matter of seconds for you to get in. Though your gold mask with intricate designs hugging your face didn’t help as the lights just reflected gold flashes into your eyes, part of that mask covered the top left side of your face and your entire forehead, leaving the right side naked but the mask hid your identity enough. You were met with security looking at every guest’s invitation, handing them yours, you were given the okay, batches of people swarm the elevators trying to get to the ball. Luckily you didn’t have to try that hard as, despite the hundreds of guests attending, everyone was calm, collected and all listening to security, though it might’ve been the fear that coerced them to submit to their instructions.
Once the elevator doors open the lively music entered your ears which made you laugh a bit, despite this ‘party’ being a masquerade ball, there was youth in the air, no boring classical music, but you were sure that they’d be some of that later in the night. Your first instinct was to dash for the bar, free drinks, free food, and you planned to make Jenna’s pockets hurt even just the tiniest bit, but then that motivation was short lived when your slow ass finally realised that this ball would have thousands of sponsors and donations.
“Hey! What can I get you?” A bartender greets you with a warm smile.
“Pornstar martini, please.” Keeping it on the sweet side, and plus you didn’t want to make a face every time you took a sip out of your drink because the alcohol taste was too strong.
“I like your style, ma’am, coming right up.”
You take mental notes of your surroundings and what your vision is telling you, you would’ve brought along a small note pad or pulled out your phone, but now was not the time, and you’d be caught dead before someone thought of you as that cliché quirky girl trying to be different so you could catch someone’s attention. Noting your surroundings, you see a bunch of masks, no shit, but you realise all the workers and body guards had matching suits, uniforms and masks, workers and body guards having different looks but under those subcategories, they were all matching, it was cute but a bit cliché you admit. Not wanting to expose yourself as a journalist straight away, you make small talk with the bartender, asking questions that wouldn’t compromise you.
“Soooo, I’m kinda new to this scene, who do you think is worth my time?”
“Well ma’am, look around and try to scan people’s faces and mannerisms, I’m sure you’ll be able to spot out some celebrities, find the ones you love and charm them, they’ll make great company for tonight.”
“And the host?”
“Heh, Ms. Ortega likes to keep it on the downlow, if you catch her attention, she’ll come to you, but her groupies always get to her first, and because their hearts are filled with greed and lust, they’ll never give her back to the party.”
“Lust rearranged is slut, KIDDING, KIDDING, I’m sure they have their reasons of wanting her.”
“No, you’re right, cus all they want is money, never genuine, always just sex.”
“But Ms. Ortega is a playgirl, she enjoys it too much to let them go?”
“Right on the nose ma’am.”
You give gratitude to the bartender for keeping you company and allowing yourself to get comfortable and adapt to the scene, but you had to let them go and do their job or I’m sure someone would’ve complained or worse, someone might’ve thought you were hitting on them or vice versa. Making small talk with strangers always pained you but you were good at it, one of the many perks about journalism, the information you want, you’d get it one way or another. But alas the open bar finally catches up to you when a tall, with a heavy dusk scent interrupts a rather pleasant conversation with the superiors of a pharmaceutical company.
“Heyyy, baby.” He slurs, trying to inch closer to you grabbing your waist but you wiggle out of his grasp, standing your ground behind your company.
“Sir, you have no business disturbing this young woman.”
“Well, you have no business disturbing the party in my pants, this young woman was going to attend.”
His comments made you sick, your shoulders tense up as you try to shake the feeling of his touch away. You had the tendency to shut down during situations like these, you want to scream, want to stand your ground, but your body wouldn’t let you, instead you hold your fort and protect yourself, shielding your cage from any comments that came towards you.
“Aw, now you’re silent, come here and I could have you screaming all night.” He reaches out for your wrist but luckily security got to him first, and they were anything but gentle, you were glad though, he got what was coming to him. It did surprise you that security apologised for his behaviour, giving you a gentle smile all at the same time inducing a fear into the man who disturbed your evening.
“Oh my, Ms, are you okay?” A man from your company asks you, sounding genuinely concerned.
“Yes, thank you, I’m okay, I’ve been through worse.”
“We’re glad to hear that you’re okay, would you like anything? Water?”
“Nooo, thank you for the offer though, but I’m really fine, thanks for calling security though.”
A look of confusion clicks on their face, almost simultaneously too.
“Uh, as much as we wanted to, we didn’t call them, we couldn’t find one in time.”
“Oh, weird, but luckily they saw, anyways, it was really lovely chatting to you guys, but I’m going to head out for some fresh air.”
“No worries at all Ms. L/N, you were a pleasure, please, you’re more than welcome to come up and chat again when you come back.”
Their comments warmed your heart, you shook all their hands, giving them a smile and moved towards the nearest door to a balcony. Once you stepped outside the cold yet refreshing breeze wrapped around your skin, making you shiver a little, but your body warmth and adrenaline was enough to calm the goosebumps down. To keep time going, you admire the city lights, you were so in love with San Francisco, and you were convinced it was in love with you too the way it welcomed you into its economic heart. Out in the distance you could see the iconic Golden Gate Bridge, blinkering and flaunting its lights to the entire city whilst providing guidance to the cars and vehicles passing through. You were in a trance, but there were no complaints coming out of you, just serenity. Too hyper focused on the view you didn’t hear the door open behind you and you certainly did not feel the presence of another body walking towards you.
“Enjoying the view?” Anonymous asks, after the whole fiasco with that grotty man, you were sure to be careful of random people coming up to you but something in you told you not to worry, the city spoke to you, and you listened.
“Very much, I’m so in love.” To your obliviousness, you don’t realise the other body with you is her. Jenna Ortega. The head and heir to the Ortega mafia family.
“Any right-minded person would be jealous of the love you have for the city.”
You giggle, and realise you feel your blood raise to your skin and your heart rhythm picks up a pace but wanting to keep their anonymity and for your own mysterious fun, you don’t turn around.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means any person would be jealous a city is getting your love rather than them.”
“Who says my love is worthy?”
“A beautiful woman like you? I can only imagine a small amount of the love you hold.”
“Beautiful? You don’t know what I look like.”
“Oh, please Ms L/N, you’ve been grabbing my attention all night, everywhere I looked, there you were, the light reflecting your beauty. But then an ugly man stood in your way, so I had to send security to escort him out, well throw him out, as you saw.”
Your heart fastens, you were sure it was going to jump out in a second, oh how badly you want to look, but you can’t. This was too much fun. However, this was the way to grab your attention, definitely not like how that man was doing earlier.
“You know how to charm a lady.”
“I try, might I ask, what do you think about the host.”
You let out a small huff of air, ironically this was your line, but now you’re the one being asked, you were at a standstill.
“Jenna? I don’t know, she’s a hard book to read.”
“And you’re good at reading people?”
“The best, but I don’t know, people are scared of her, the most feared women in America.”
Jenna giggles.
“You’re not scared?”
“Hmm, no, mind over matter always, she can have all these weapons and power, but I don’t know her mind, her true mind, so I have nothing to fear.” There was a slight bluff in that line, of-course you were slightly scared of her, who wouldn’t be? But that fear was surface level, just guns and weapons and power.
Though you couldn’t see who you were talking to, you could feel a smile form on their lips, but more of a proud smirk.
“Do you think she’s hot though?”
Okay, now that, that definitely grounded you to reality, that question hit you like a brick, it was so out of place, so unexpected, curious as ever, you finally turn around to greet the other soul aligning with yours.
Jenna. Fuck, y/n you’re so stupid, should’ve turned around earlier, just stay calm.
“Cats got your tongue? Or were you lying about not being scared?”
Both.
She’s wearing an emerald green suit that hugged her curves and angles, leaving the top few buttons undone, with an undone bow tie around her neck.
“No,” letting it out accompanied by a breath out, “I’m just surprised that you would come up to me.”
“There’s a pretty lady at my party, I want to talk to her, I go talk to her.”
“There are other pretty ladies here, and you can’t see half my face, I can’t say the same for you though, the host of a masquerade doesn’t wear a mask? That’s a Pandora’s box.”
Her eyebrows raise, a slight smirk forms before her mouth forms an O, clearly showcasing her tongue poking the side of her cheek.
“A mask means I have secrets, and I, have no secrets, an open book.”
“That’s ironic” you mumble.
“What’s that?”
“You say you have no secrets, but it’s a mission and a half to get an exclusive with you.”
“Journalist?”
“Rising star journalist.” Her eyes squint at your attempt to boost your ego.
“I could give you an exclusive upstairs.” You may be oblivious but you’re not naïve, you play along though, you were exclusive hungry, but you definitely weren’t going to open your legs for her.
“Lead the way.” She offers her hand, and you accept, now with each other’s arms linked, she leads you to an elevator, only accessible by her and her most trusted companions.
“Holy shit that’s Steph and Ayesha Curry!”
“Oh, hahaha yes, they’re close friends of mine, now do you want the Curry’s or the exclusive?”
“Both?”
“Don’t be greedy.”
“You’re the one whisking me away, so you can have me all to yourself.”
“Maybe, but you were the one who asked for something.”
“Touché.
Though there were two of you, the negative space in the elevator was filled with tension, making sure not to make eye contact with the mafia leader.
“You never answered the question, do you think Jenna is hot?”
You lean in, making sure to work her up in all the right places, even placing your hand on her waist.
“Hmm, nope. Desperate? Maybe. But hot? That’s a different story.”
“You’re playing hard to get.”
“Awe, poor baby, it’s tough not getting everything you want.” You flaunt a comedic pout at her but all she does is rolls her eyes.
As the elevators open, your mouth drops in sync with the slides, her penthouse was breath taking, though it was night time, the city lights lit up the room giving it a dark, twilight feel.
“Wow.”
“It’s okay.” She shakes it off.
“Way to be humble.”
“I am rich, sexy, kind, loving and humble.”
You scoff and roll your eyes, your subconscious taking a hold of you as it drags your physical body in.
Jenna starts pouring two glasses of Dom Pérignon for you two to enjoy. Making you laugh because no one had access to this downstairs, yes, downstairs had top shelf drinks, but not Dom, they didn’t have Dom.
A simultaneous “cheers” escapes your mouths as your glasses clink in unison.
“Before I start rambling on about me, tell me about yourself, I want to know you, the true you.”
“That seems fair, well since you already know my name, let’s skip that.” Jenna winks at you. “I never knew what a home was growing up, I was in foster care my entire childhood and teenage years, in many houses, but never homes only leaving the system because I turned 18, I never knew who my birth parents were, nor do I care, I’ve made it through life without them, made something out of myself, made my own name, and that’s when I learnt I could build a home for myself. And I did, I moved here, landed an amazing job at Bayseyes, and the CEO of the company? She’s my lifeline, my saving grace, she is my home. Oh, and uh, my favourite colour is red, evidently.” You smile, looking down at your dress. Making Jenna smile too as she analyses each body part of yours and skin that shows.
“You are one interesting book Ms. L/N.” Jenna darts her eyes to yours, soul to soul, down at your lips and back to your eyes, you know what she wants, she wants you. But doubts ran your mind asking if you want her.
You gasp and take a step back.
“Do you hate me?”
“What?”
“You have a chance with America’s most lusted woman, and you’re turning me down.”
“Okay first of all, that ego of yours, too big, second of all, who says I want this.”
“Who doesn’t?”
“Watch it.”
“Watch yourself, like you said everyone fears me, don’t forget how powerful I am.” Her tone sounds awry, evidently you pissed her off, but maybe she deserved it.
No words could leave your mouth after that, maybe then you truly knew her mind, her true mind, and that made answering no to her earlier question even easier, no, you didn’t find her hot, you found her revolting. You mouth a wowww, your eyes widening and your lips purse in, and you swear for a slight second you see Jenna vulnerable; you see her weak.  
“I should go, thanks for the drinks though.”
As you turn to leave the elevator doors open, a woman dressed, definitely not for the ball struts in, her scent reeking of desperation.
“Jenna, sugar bear, where have you been. I miss you! What, who’s this slut?”
As if you thought your eyes couldn’t widen anymore, you were wrong. As if Jenna couldn’t get more pissed, you were wrong, the fury in her pupils, your rejection already knocked her off course, she didn’t need a groupie barging in without announcement.
“This slut is about to leave.”
“Good.” Both exclaim.
But before you could turn and leave the doors open again, this time, a very aesthetically pretty lady, 5’5, brunette hair, adorned with layers and tan skin rushes in.
“JENNA, oh my, I’m so sorry, I tried to stop her.”
“No, it’s fine, Viv, she can stay, she, however, was just leaving, please show her the way out.”
She nods and you follow, but before turning your head, you see Jenna land a kiss on the other girl’s cheek, whispering in her ear, you guess it was something along the lines of meeting her in the bedroom, since the pattering legs ran to the bedroom. You don’t care though, it made you sick, that’s all you know.
Before the doors close, Jenna tries one more time, determined not to give up, rejection was something she never knew.
“Leave me with a kiss?”
You let out a slight laugh, almost mocking her, she was everything you were against, how could you open your soul to someone like her.
“No.”
“No?”
“Not when you’re everything I’m against.”
“How so?”
“Well, there’s a glock attached to your lumbar underneath your blazer.”
“Protection.”
You smile.
“Goodbye, Ms. Ortega.”
~~
Viv was there to witness every interaction she could have seen, and wow, she was shocked, she had never seen someone with such fire blow off Jenna like that, she liked you.
“I’m Viv, by the way.” She smiles, offering to shake your hand, you accept.
“Vivian?”
“Vivica!”
“Oh, how pretty, I’m-.”
“Y/N, uh yes, sorry ahah, I know, you’re the talk of the towers.”
“WHAT?”
“Just the staff and guards and the subjects, so uh, maybe the whole Ortega family.”
“Fuck.”
“No, no, we all like you, we find you interesting, we’ve never seen Jenna fiend for someone like that, it was refreshing, but you know, she’s not always like that, the way you saw her, in her penthouse.”
“Forgive me if I find that hard to believe. So, are you like her right-hand man? Woman?”
“Yeah, something like that, I handle mainly the business side, but I could whoop ass if I wanted to, her other right-hand man, the physical, more mafia side is Bruce, he was the guard that threw the guy out, the one who was harassing you.”
“OH! He was sweet, he smiled at me.”
“Lucky you, that means he likes you.”
As you step out the elevators into the main lobby, you can’t help but feel a sense of the unknown, there was lingering fire in you that you couldn’t pinpoint the origin, was it desire? Hatred? Lust? Regret? Hell, maybe even hunger.
“Thank you, Viv.”
“It’s no problem, Y/N, it was very nice to meet you, I hope our paths cross again!”
You hug her and she reciprocates it, just before hopping into your uber to take you home.
~~
As you got home, you had a sense of urgency to write, that electricity was back, you didn’t care about changing or freshening up, the words were flowing out of you and you needed to let it out, you are so sure this is your best work, you want this article published tonight so you type away. You have no control over your fingers, they were doing all the work, you just had to trust them.
… whether it be by her heart, her touch, or her gun, anyone that knows the elusive Ms. Ortega is destined to fall.
~~
Thank you for your support <3 I hope you enjoyed! 🦦
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ghuleh-recs · 3 months
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♡ Fandom Faves Tag ♡
Tag 1-3 (or as many as you want) of your favorite creators (writers, artists, outstanding members of the community etc) and link your favorite creation if you can.
Thank you for the tags @midnight-moth and @coffeeghoulie! I'm gonna challenge myself to not wax poetic and keep these extra short and sweet. That way it's not as intimidating for others to participate (hope that makes sense). Oh and I'm not putting a "keep reading."
Witness my faves (ง •̀_•́)ง
@midnight-moth (who started this tag game ♡) drew THE Phantom art of all time and I recently went absolutely feral for:
Buried in Treasure - Dew x Phantom - E, 3.6k
When his eyes roll forward again, he notices more than just the same riff playing over and over. He notices Phantom’s grip on his hand simultaneously go still and tight. He notices the rosy flush on his cheeks, and the tent in his pants that he tries to conceal with the hand holding the phone. It takes more than a few seconds for all of the dots to connect and when the thought is fully formed, Dew grabs the phone and launches it to the end of the bed.
@ramblingoak hey why is there an angel in the satanic band fandom? I created this whole blog so I could shout about:
The Cardinal's Bride - Cardinal Copia x F!Reader - E, 91k (wip)
A Romantic Adventure in the Old West: After being forced into a marriage with Mr. Saltarian by your father you are sent west to his estate in Nevada. Along the way you end up meeting one of the cowboys you have always fantasized about…
@conjuring-ghouls finds the perfect moments and turns them into the loveliest gifs. On top of that she is endlessly kind and supportive. Look at these!!!
@coffeeghoulie is writing the Aeon x Swiss hurt/comfort fic of y'all's dreams and I got to do my first "official" art collab for it yay!!
Eternal Heatstroke - Aeon x Swiss - M, 17k (wip)
For once in their life, Aeon feels lucky. Whoever's opened this portal, whoever's summoning ghouls Up Top, specifically wants a quintessence ghoul. They may not be the biggest or strongest quintessence ghoul, far from it, but they'll do anything this summoner wants if it means they get to live. Or: being Topside is a drastic change from the life Aeon's used to.
@writingjourney truly the kindest soul and an absurdly talented writer. I screenshot Ibi's tags on my posts all the time because they cheer me up so much 🥹🥹
Friday Nights (series) - Papas x GN!Reader - E, 40k
“But to die as lovers may - to die together, so that they may live together.” ― Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu, Carmilla Each of these stories features a vampire papa and a gender neutral reader.
@anamelessfool writes some of the best world building and characterizations that I have ever read in fanfiction AND she's a fantastic artist.
Violence & Gentleness - Primo x OC - E, 50k (wip)
You made me forget myself...I thought I was someone else, someone good... LATE OCTOBER 1979 Primo has his work cut out for him as the bodyguard of the beautiful and fearsome Mater Emerita Jocasta. As mystery after mystery unfolds, it becomes harder to remain a honest man in this den of thieves called the Ministry.
@foxybouquet makes wonderful art and her colloquial Italian posts are an incredible resource for the fandom.
@angellayercake has angel in her username for a reason tbh. I'm not exaggerating when I say that I learned important things about myself and my love language whilst reading the brilliant:
Banchetto - Terzo x F!Reader - E, 22k (wip)
Papa Emeritus III is struggling to adapt to his life after the Ghost project but perhaps some good homemade Italian food will do the trick.
(I'm cutting myself off here because I could do this all day. I will probably be making another list in the near future because I love and admire so many of you. 😅)
No pressure at all but I would really love to see this tag game keep going! If you're reading this please consider adding some of your personal favorites to the list! This fandom could use some positivity right about now ♡
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Note
AITA for staying friends with someone?
I (25, nonbinary) became friends with someone (19F) online because they liked a fanfic I wrote. Let's call her Jessie. At first, Jessie messaged me just to say she enjoyed my fic and shared a fanart she drew of it. I was absolutely blown away by that, and let her know how nice her art was. Which started us having a pretty normal online friendship. Chatting about silly fandom things or ranting about our jobs or school or whatever. She is a really smart and funny person!
Jessie started writing fanfic, which I encouraged. It's fun to write! Of course I would read her fanfic and let her know I enjoyed it.
But then it turned into her only messaging me to read her fanfic. Like, we never can hold a conversation anymore without it turning to talking about her fanfic. I don't even bring up my own fics anymore because I know it will switch the conversation to Jessie's fics.
And, Jessie started to pressure me to write her ideas. Like "Oh, this would be a good idea! You should write this! When are you going to write this! I'll be waiting to read it. Have you written it yet?" When I never agreed to write it. Half the time, it's not even something I would want to write.
Or, I read this one fic and wrote a post on tumblr about how much I enjoyed it, and then minutes later had Jessie spamming my messages about how I should make a post promoting her fics. And exactly which ones I should promote because they don't get enough attention.
But the most recent thing Jessie has been doing that has annoyed me is continuously asking "If I think her fics are just as good as my fics". Like, I'm not a talented author, in my opinion. I'm pretty average. But I feel like the answer Jessie wants is for me to say Jessie's fics are better than mine. It always feels like Jessie wants to put myself under her which is...just not a good feeling. I usually just say I think we are about the same, but Jessie never seems satisfied with that answer.
I feel like our friendship has shifted to Jessie only wanting to use me for attention and the small amount of publicity I can offer. (Which isn't much. It's not like I am a well-known person or anything. I'm certainly not exactly a BNF writer or anything)
Here is where I am asking if I am an asshole. I've gotten to the point where I don't even LIKE Jessie anymore. Her actions have just...soured our relationship. I just roll my eyes when I see a notification from her, or shit talk her in real life to my brother. I procrastinate answering her messages.
But I really don't want to be mean to her face. She has had a really hard time in life. Her parents are kinda shit and her boyfriend left her (which he wasn't so great either). She has a ton of health issues, money issues, relationship issues, etc. I don't want to just drop her and make things worse for her life. But also, I just kinda can't stand the behavior anymore.
Part of me thinks I should just set up more clear boundaries, but on the other hand I just don't want to put in the effort of fighting her for those boundaries. And I am pretty sure it would be a fight.
Am I an asshole for continuing the motions of a friendship for a person I don't even like anymore? Should I just end the friendship and let them move on, or would that be worse?
(Asdfghjkl123)
What are these acronyms?
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wormsin · 3 months
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at what point did dick’s fatass become a meme, was there a specific issue that drew his ass huge that tipped the iceberg?
ok, I love that at least one person out there thinks that I am an authority on this topic.
no, there was not one issue that drew his ass so incredibly that it suddenly became iconic. over the years, Dick grew up from being a platonic boy hero to a sexual adult, then sex isol, then bearer of an (at times) voluptuous ass. this video has a good recap!
(sidebar—I need to make a correction to the video, which is a bit of misinformation I see floating around all the time, which is the idea that Devon Grayson did not admit or know that what she wrote in Nightwing #93 was sexual assault. she just didn't call it rape at the time, but said it was nonconsensual, and depicted it as sexually traumatizing for Dick. 2004)
ANYWAY,
I would say his fat ass became a meme recently. and. gonna be honest with you. except for a few depictions, it is not that big of an ass. he is way too skinny to have a truly fat ass. It's still nice! but let's not kid ourselves.
last year, the Harley Quinn tv show changed Dick's model to have a larger ass for an important plot point. which is how we got... the ass casket. cassket.
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2022, Harley Quinn: The Animated Series: The Eat. Bang! Kill. Tour #3.
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Nicola Scott's tribute cover, 2019. this kind of went viral and likely solidified the fanon-turned-canon that Dick has a great ass.
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in Grayson #6, 2015, Midnighter recognized Dick by his ass.
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ah, gay rights have come so far.
I won't get into the whole history of Dick Grayson being sexualized in general because that is a huge, huge topic. he's been sexualized since the NTT at least, and superheroes in general are a site of body image politic, bla bla. so I'm sticking to his butt in particular.
around this time, some DC writers and artists are purposefully trying to make Dick's ass prominent on the page. or at least Simone is. "I am writing it, of course there’s Nightwing ass!" Gail Simone, 2014, referring to Nighting/Oracle convergence. did the comic deliver on the ass? sadly no.
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a little earlier, Nightwing (2011) #40, from 2013, has a some notable art. I've seen lots of people reference it as some kind of "female gaze" thing, which. I get what that's trying to say but you can't just invert the theory of the male gaze. sorry.
so I think it was the mid 2010s where this idea that he has a great ass starts to influence canon writers and artists, which reached a boiling point 2019 and 20s. now, artists had drawn Dick in a sexual manner before, and had drawn him with a gorgeous ass. I think it's both fan culture and some work of inspired artists that got us to this point of having a canon history of Nightwing Ass. its also important to note that in the later 2010's, the idealized body included a fat ass, which was really not the case in, say, the 90s.
if anyone has earlier issues or instances of Dick Grayson ass-centrism, please send it my way. I've only read like. a quarter of all of Dick Grayson's appearances lol.
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factual-fantasy · 1 year
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24 moar asks :}
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..That’s.. That’s a good point.
I’ve noticed recently that I’ve been trying very hard to get all these projects done, but I just cant seem to get past this writers/artist block.. Ingo and Emmet part 3, my FNAF AU, the Rosalina comic.. all of it has just felt really draining. I think its because I’m turning these projects into work, instead of a fun hobby.
I actually was working on the Petey Piranha comic last night, but I just couldn’t get past the sketching stage. So I took a break to draw what ever I wanted and.. I had a lot of fun.
I think I’ve overwhelmed myself thinking I have to do all these projects and get them done quickly for.. what ever reason. And its made art really draining.
I think I’m gonna take all of my projects (aside from my FNAF AU) and just. Put them on the shelf for now. I’ll draw them if I ever feel like it. 
Thanks for the little push anon.
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When ever I want. And it’ll be what ever I want :}
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@aemered​
If you see that someone has reposted my art and you want to do something about it, first of all thank you very much that’s really kind of you-
SECOND OFF, report it if you can. If you cant then leave a comment saying its stolen and link back to my tumblr or just mention my name. Thanks again! Its really cool that you’d want to do that for me- 💕😭💕
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I had planned that he could eat a fire flower and spit out a fire ball, but I later took away that ability. Yoshi ain’t got no fire powers :(
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They do exist, and Bowser does care about them.. but he doesn't show it as much as he does in canon. He’s a lot more stern and ruler like. A lot less touchy feely you know?
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The idea is that the 1-UP mushroom has fully left Mario’s body. So any effects or pain he experiences all lies in his trauma related to the incident.
Now, if Luigi were to die and be revived by a 1-UP? It would be the same. If the experience was traumatic and he suffered a horrible injury, he would probably deal with phantom pains too..
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@tempestrio​
For most of them I just referenced clothing that relates to the attraction/style they have in the game.
For Chica I looked up kids rock star costumes and took reference of what I thought looked good. For Bonnie I looked up old vintage bowling ally shirts and referenced the one that looked closest to his canon shirt. For Foxy I referenced pirate coats and costumes. For Monty I looked up old golfing outfits and picked out aspects that I liked and mixed it with punk/rock and roll. For Roxanne I referenced punk rock I think..? And old racing fire suits.
For Freddy though I mostly made it up.. but I looked at a bunch of different artists that made redesigns for Freddy and tried to capture the vibe of the ones I liked. Mostly the collar on his coat was something a lot of those artists drew-
For Gregory I just gave him a new outfit based on the story. When he went back to the Pizzaplex his clothes were dirty and worn.. so Freddy went and got him new clothes from one of the gift shops. So I went to google and referenced the sweaters and clothes you find throughout the game and gave him stuff that looked similar. Hope this helped! :}
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There is! But its not that deep don’t worry-
When I was designing my sona, I wanted something on my hands. At the time my hands were covered in Band-Aids due to cat scratched and dry/cracked skin. So I thought hey! I could have bandaged hands! So I added them.
They also work if you call them my “artist hands” lol-
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No, thank YOU for engaging with my content and sending me lovely messages! :D
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@thedorkyidiot​
Oh he’s in the AU, he’s probably one of the smaller gorilla types that just kind’a vibes and does old man stuff. He probably has to eat the sweeter fruits though because his jaw isn’t so strong anymore. Much to his dismay.. 
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She didn’t cause any problems per say, the Toads didn’t even know she existed. Although she does create these shooting stars every time she comes to the planet.. but that doesn’t bother the Toads either, In fact they celebrate them. So the toads have no issue with Rosalina.
Also she apologized to Mario and Luigi for “disturbing” them because they heard her crying and they went to investigate. :(
And thank you! I’m glad you like my interpretations! :D
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Well you’re in luck! My FNAF AU is the only project I plan to not drop and keep working on! Hahaha!... haaahhhh
(Also thank you very much that was very sweet 😭)
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@shannonallaround​
I don’t actually have a specific name that I tag my AU under.. but if you were to search “mario” in my blog search you’ll find just about every Mario related post I’ve ever made. AU and not AU.
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Not yet.. 👀
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The reason why Mario experiences phantom pain is because his first death was very traumatic for him. So whether or not he experiences phantom pains with his future deaths all depends on how he died, and how it effected him mentally.
Same goes for Luigi. If he dies a horribly painful/traumatic death.. he’ll likely experience phantom pains too..
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@color-craz​
There was a comic planned for how they met him actually.
They got lost in the woods and stumbled upon King Boos mansion. Like an idiot Mario goes in and Luigi follows. They both ended up getting tormented and pranked by the Boos. They were separated at one point but then met back up on the second floor. Mario sees a fire flower in an old flower pot and grabs it.
As soon as he becomes fire Mario.. the entire mansion goes completely silent..
Then, all the windows and doors slowly shut. Some of the lights come on and Mario and Luigi follow them. They follow the lights down the hall, down the stairs, through the main room and wind up led to the front door..
The front door is wide open. Mario and Luigi walk out.. only for the door to slam shut behind them. Locking them out.
Mario harnessing a fire flower was so bizarre, so impossible! That King Boo knew he was outmatched against him. So King Boo just silently let them out of the mansion without a fuss. 
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@mysteriousl0ser​
I’m not sure how they would react to the Koopalings, but I imagine they wouldn't hurt them. It doesn’t take a genius to tell that the Koopalings are just kids..
As for their behaviors.. I think its close to the canon interpretations, except for Ludwig and JR. I had planned that Ludwig was going to be much bigger and more stern like his pa. Because he is the heir to the throne.. but then google told me that Roy is the oldest so there goes that plan-
For JR though his plans stick. JR is supposed to be smaller and younger. More like a toddler then a kid. He’s the youngest and the one Bowser is most protective of. 
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@gravitystar96​
Thank you! I’m glad you like my AU! :D
As for if anyone will find Gregory.. I haven’t planned if anyone will or who it will be. Although it will likely be Chica or Monty.
Since Chica is so close to Freddy, she is bound to find out about this entire child that he has kept secret-
As for Monty.. I liked the idea of Gregory hiding for some reason.. and he calls for Freddy through his fazwatch in a panic. After a few minutes he hears big thumping plasticky foot steps approaching. He comes out of hiding thinking its Freddy..
But it was Monty.
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I made them brothers because I could :}
Although I’m questioning it now. Maybe they could just be friends. They could just be two idiots who found each other and decided to reek havoc together.
Oooor they could be brothers., Hmm.. I’ll have to give it some more thought XD
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If Bowser had gone straight for Luigi, first of all he would have to land a fatal blow twice. Because the power of the Ice Flower would Protect Luigi from one big hit. That’s actually why Mario died in one shot. Because the Fire Flower had just run our of power.
But anyway- after loosing the ice flower and getting hit? Luigi would just die.. and stay dead. Only Mario had consumed a 1-UP mushroom at that point..
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I imagined them as these strange monsters that live in the woods. They don’t work for Bowser, or Peach, they just do their own thing. I also imagined them to deal with dark magic and rituals and stuff. 
Wanna hear how Mario and Luigi first met one?
The plan was that the bros and Yoshi were exploring when they found a shy guy with its leg caught in a tree root. Mario carefully approached to try and help.. but the closer he got. The longer and more deformed the shy guy became.
Yoshi ended up snatching them both up and running away. Mario mysteriously had a fever that lasted for a few days after that..
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Me waiting for my platonic kiss on the forehead be like:
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My favorite character? Oooo that’s a good question. There’s a lot to choose from.. but one of my favorites is Hal Monitor. Always love it when he’s on screen XD
I actually like stupid Mario sometimes, he’s pretty funny XD
So far my favorite arc is the lawsuit arc. Mostly because I’m not caught up on the other arcs. The little nuggets of Mario angst/wholesomeness we got in that arc was delicious XD 
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@spencer-the-fox-87​
If the Monkeys were to eat the red beets they would gain more muscle mass overtime. But its not a matter of them not being able to eat them, they just don’t like them.
The blue fruits are very sweet and juicy, and the beets are dry and bitter. The kongs that like bitter flavors eat the beets and grow to be huge. and overtime they develop a dislike for sweet tastes. And vice versa.
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cloudcountry · 1 year
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♡ AUBURN'S MUTUALS !! (there's more of you than i thought HELP)
@tinyletterz / 🍙 — my friend since forever ago, genuinely one of the kindest people i have ever met. she's so cute and she writes beautifully!!!! i highly HIGHLY recommend her flower language series GFGRGRGRGRFRFR
@identity-theft-101 / 🪓 — bonded over mushroom stayed for the eels tbh!! chaos incarnate BUT he has a cute bird named asa that said she loves me so i'm winning
@names-are-dumb / 🐚 — i'm so glad i got to introduce them to twisted wonderland. i am reliving my own experience through him rn. IM SO GLAD YOU LIKE OCTAVINELLE GRAHHH!!!!! one month later and we're married he's my husband and my angelfish that i write cringe ass sonnets too and i adore him <33 muah muah
@merotwst / 🧶 — LITERALLY SO SWEET OMG. she's so warm and welcoming its no wonder people just gravitate to her :C i adore her tbh she made me feel so welcomed even though i'm still scared of most twst writers LMAO
@shkrmpp / 🦐 — one of my first moots!!! personally i really love their hair dye headcanons GRAH they're so cute BUT!! they also draw C:< AND ITS A CUTE STYLE. plus their blog always looks MUAH
@siren-serenity / 🌙 — YOU'RE EVIL I STILL THINK ABOUT "i need you" WHY DID YOU WRITE THAT /lh no but actually you're so good at writing angst that rips my heart out like. if i want to sob i'm going for your azul angst (ITS A GOOD THING PROMISE)
@siphoklansan / ☔ — BEAUTIFUL ART. STUNNING. i love love love how much detail she puts into her pieces (yes i am thinking abt the floyd piece for the lipstick challenge ITS SO CUTE) AND SHE DREW STUFF BASED ON THE SONG HEART ATTACK AND I THINK ABOUT IT EVERY DAY.
@fukashiin / 💌 — silly little goofy deuce rambles and omg the leech twins. I REREAD THE STARING THINGY SHE WROTE OVER AND OVER AZULLLL AZUL'S PART IS SO %@$!%##@%!$#$%@!$#%@$!#%!@%#$!@#$%
@ryuubff / 🪼 — omg there is literally so much i could say about them. my first obey me mutual. the first person who was alike "omg let's create solomon content together." i love talking to them sm and honestly they deserves the best because they're so kind and creative C: WAHHHH
@hisui-dreamer / 🌟 — SO SWEET. i know i'm saying a lot but i have so many mutuals that made me feel so welcomed and rinna was one of them. every single piece of work you'll find on that blog is brewing with emotions and gentle care I LOVE.,,.., I LOVE!!!!!!
@officialdaydreamer00 / 🌠 — ?!?!?!?! ALSO INCREDIBLY KIND AND SO SO CREATIVE!!!! they draw me things all the time and it literally melts my heart :((( i love lov love talking to them about octavinelle and they're super easy to connect with :(((
@the-v-lociraptor / 💙 — we literally just became moots a little bit ago BUT i find a lot of good fanart through her!! she reblogs a lot of cool stuff :D !!!!!
@ceruleancattail / 🔷 — I FORGOT TOW RITE SMTH HELP EM anyways <33 ceru writes some cute ass shit that makes me kick my feet and squeal (AND ALL THE AZUL CONTENT I HAVENT BINGED YET....UGH IM SO EXCITED)
@i-like-forgs / 💪 — appreciator of sand cats and draws a lot!! the creator of my wedding venue with azul and enabler of so many of my ramble i am clinging to his ankle as he drags me around
@valerie-leech / 💚 — we just started talking but they're part of the auburn azul wedding squad!! :D im excited to interact with them <3
@twst-beam / 🎉 — we also haven't talked a lot yet but i can't wait to get to know her better C: !!
@iseethatimicy / 💎 — a fellow azul kisser!! i finally found another one!! :D has an unholy amount of azul memes i do not know where they come from (probably pinterest) but they are Fascinating
@acornwinter / 💫 — sends random shit in my inbox because they started talking about their dreams once and i decided Yes!! and now they draw my ocs and its super cute and i love their little tiny ppl drawings C:
@totallymem3 / 🥀 — we just started talking but!! very sweet <33 her art style is just MMMMUAH CHEFS KISS!!!!!!!!! i love it. it reminds me of spring.
@z3llous / 🐸 — draws azul SOOOOO good i love lovelovlevoevloev his art!!! its so scrumptious i eat it all up for breakfast lunch dinner ON NOMNOM
@cecilebutcher / 🪩 — has a bunch of really cool ocs!!! igor my belobed /p they have such a creative mind and its a pleasure to listen to them ramble about the characters they created!!! :D
@ang33333333l / 🙏 — another azul kisser!! we haven't talked much but i can tell doll is a very sweet person <33
@axvwriter / 👻 — SHE HAS AZUL'S DORM UNIFORM AND IM SO JEALOUS. LITERALLY SO UNFAIR.
@soru-ya / 🍞 — THEY WROTE AROACE CONTENT FOR ME :((((( CRYING RN they're such a good writer please go check them out PLEASE im begging you
@rains-asleep / 🐝 — ANOTHE RGOOD WRITER WHAWHWAHWHAHWA <33333 we had such a deep conversation about caramel once it was enlightening.
@shinysparklesapphires / 🎀 — floods my inbox with precure stuff and now its next on my watch list. started the laura and azul siblings conspiracy :O !!!!!
@twistedchatterboxed / 🌊 — The jade kisser ever. we have a lot of mutual moots (hehe say that ten times fast) so i'm excited to get to know her better!! :D
@keii01 / 🍡 — she's so sweet i want to put her in my pocket and carry her around everywhere i go!! she draws a lot of cute stuff too (there is no such thing as too many ribbons <3)
@tsun0tar0u / 🐉 — showed me a genshin glitch once and i have never been the same. also i would die for kafka btw. normal about rollo btw. So Normal.
@non-binary-lil-shit / 🍄 — enables my marine bio and mycology rambling!! also i am very concerned for you C:
@queen-shiba / 🦁 — your profile theme is literally so pretty i am eating it right now (IDK I JUST LOVE ORANGE) also the leona blender post made me so confused but also i laughed really hard HELP
@vioisgoinginsane / 💜 — she likes some vampire game i think LMAO but the twst content? YUMMY. a writer once in a blue moon and apparently best known for the BITING ROOK HUNT post. GET IT!!!
@moonlit-midnight / 🌸 — hannah is such a good writer :(( WRITES PLATONIC FICS DID YOU HEAR THAT EVERYONE!!! PLATONIC FICS!!!!!!! they're all so adorable and make me want to curl up under a blanket with a mug of hot chocolate <3
@ryker-writes / 🦚 — asked about to deep sea and LET ME TELL YOU i got so excited about it and im still writing it hehe. ryker writes a lot of familial angst so its that your thing go for it!!
@datboredpencil / 💀♦️ — GORGEUYS ART ABSOLUTELY SCRUMPTIOUS YUMY UMY UM AN ENTIRE BUFFET!!!! theres a lot of idia x cater content too if thats youre thing!!! :D
@twistwonderlanddevotee / 🪷 — we havent talked a lot but im still happy to have you here!! :D
@beeirdos-buzzing-bogaloo / 🐥 — apparently very normal about sebek. the Most normal. we havent talked a lot but hes silly :D
@dove-da-birb / 🪿 — literally so funny. putting you in my pocket right now!! ALSO I LOVE YOUR BRAINROTTING HELP
@loser-jpg / 😬 — YOUR BEWILDERMENT AT MY DASH SPAMMING WAS REALLY FUNNY i hope you get used to it </3
@ashipiko / 🌺 — THE #1 ACE KISSER EVER???? her art is so munchy and yummy i want to eat it :(( HER STYLE IS SO CUTE SRSLY IF YOU HAVENT SEEN HER ART YET PLEASE CHECK IT OUT
@shyhaya / you should pick an emoji!! — wrote the most fantastic delicious delightful heart wrenching thing for azul and tagged ME in it :(((( AAAAAA IM SO SORRY I DIDNT SEE IT SOONER. IF YOU EVER WRITE FOR AZUL AGAIN PLEASE TAG ME I'D LOVE TO SEE IT.
@musicalhistorical / 👹 — omg hi quotev person you've been putting up w my bullshit since forever ITS SO FUNNY TO SEE YOU HERE LMAO
@thehollowwriter / 🎶 — ITS LITERALLY A CRIME I HAVENT FOUND YORU WRITING SOONER??? WHY HAVENT I SEEN IT??? IM GOING TO BINGE YOUR AZUL FICS RIGHT NOW EVERYONE SHUT UP I AM SHAKING YOU AROUND QUINN
♡ AUBURN'S ANONS!!
magical girl anon
seahorse anon
❤️ anon
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gggoldfinch · 6 months
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brrrrrrr art dump for the tfp self insert oc my childhood self could only dream of 🤯 I drew these back in July but have been thinking about them again recently. This is so embarrassing but I'm so proud of how these character sheets came out, but I can't post them without context so here we goooooo (oc info at the bottom!!!!!!😭)
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Embarrassing au & oc info time!!!!!! (tw for vague discussion of non-human self-harm in 10th bullet point):
Okay so basically to preface: in my wip fic (wip is a gross exaggeration), everything remains canonically accurate to TFP except for the fact I use my Magic Fanfic Writer Powers to incorporate ridiculous Cybertronian mysticism canon into it for the sole purpose of furthering my self indulgent plot armor via cyberforming (cyberforming being when organic material becomes that of Cybertronian-make through means of mysticism and/or science)
Marian (unabashed tradgoth self insert) starts off as human. She gets picked up by the Cons while smashed drunk one night bc they think she has info on the Bots (found her bc she was lurking on online forums asking too many questions about big robot aliens bc she once saw them brawling and wanted answers), then she just ends up being kept alive and kept around as a pet/team mascot/ emotional support human, because hey if the Bots have one then maybe humans can be of some use
After a while Marian ends up forming a bond with Starscream (and KO to a lesser extent) after they both end up treating each other with compassion and respect (wow! trauma-bonding!). She kinda definitely falls desperately in love with him (and thinks it's unrequited but jk!). Angst & hurt/comfort abound! Gratuitous usage of mass-displacement device for nsfw purposes! You didn't hear that from me...
She is accidentally killed during the Battle on Cybertron (ca. season 3) by being hit with a stray plasma blast.
Here is where AU material comes in lol!!!!!!!
With the Well of AllSparks alive once again, in an act of desperation SS leaves her body at the edge of the well and actually prays for once in his miserable life. Through a mystical act of pity or mercy or whatever, a fresh spark combines with her own approximation of a soul and cyberforms her corpse and resurrects/ reincarnates her. She's herself, with all her old memories— but also something new, with all-new potential. No one knows wtf is going on lol
She becomes the first mech created on "New" Cybertron. "Cyberform-forged" is the term used for her, making her something of a new race (in the same way the Terrans are a new race), and is more of a mystic anomaly than anything (largely because there is no opportunity to recreate the event).
She's formed with a Vosnian Seeker frame and Cybertronian alt mode. Her frame is weather resistant: built to tolerate and fly through high winds and dangerous weather (Cybertronian and Terran) and relies more on brute force than grace in aviation. This means she is bulky rather than slim and aerodynamic like SS. She's a revival of the (near?) extinct class (if we're going by Prime!canon then Starscream is the only confirmed Vosnian Seeker left). Why Primus decided that cranking out new Vosnians would be a good idea is beyond everyone; everyone is too busy wondering how tf cyberforming works and what the consequences of it are to really question it.
Physically, she's not overtly femme— more androgynous, which is on brand for her Vosnian build. She's top-heavy with large pauldrons, shoulders double the width of her hips. Her new frame reflects her old human body in a very rough, vague way— only enough to be noticeable to those who really knew her before. She applies face paint by hand like her old makeup, and paints one servo red to match how she used to wear her nail polish. She's shorter than SS, around 30-ish feet tall (whereas he pushes 35'). She doesn't have a very good grasp on how her wings emote, therefore anyone who can read Seeker body language can always tell exactly how she's feeling.
She suffers with severe ptsd, depression, and body dysmorphia/ dysphoria as a result of the cyberforming and her human death, and semi-often has moments of panic and distress wherein she self-harms in an attempt to undo what's been done. In a potent mix of lingering human neurodivergency & the jarring biological shift, she often gets overwhelmed by her new body, notably her biomechanical functions: her optics cause a significant amount of stress on a regular basis, to the point where visual "notifications" and all other miscellaneous visual obstructions have to be disabled in order for her to function. This means no scanning data, etc, without purposefully reactivating the internal procedures required for the task. She also has a lot of trouble coping with the lack of sexual dimorphism. Shortly after her "awakening," she brutalized herself due to severe confusion and psychological distress (see the second to last image :( ) and KO had to sedate and mend her.
Every who encounters her and knows her story kinda assumes she just "came back" with a processor malfunction (or if they don't know her story, think she was just traumatized by the war), which isn't totally wrong. Knockout is one of her major supporters thru this and professionally thinks she probably needs a mnemosurgeon to fix her, but can't find any to contact so soon post-war.
She's rather clumsy, and takes a while to acclimate to such a different body (it also doesn't help that Seekers tend to have disproportionally long limbs, as well as cumbersome wings). She smacks things and other mechs with her wings, crushes things in her servos, basically she severely underestimates her own strength and size
One perk to her new body is that she can stream music directly into her processor, which is a function she abuses often to drown everything else out. There are functions she couldn't even dream of before: she can disable pain processors, turn off sight and hearing like throwing a switch, disable various biomechanical functions. She doesn't need to breathe like a human, or expel waste. Energon tastes like battery acid and firecrackers, but hey, she can turn off "taste" processors too.
She's afraid of herself at times, and by extension is afraid of intimacy too. She's afraid she's too different now, in a foreign body she can't seem begin understanding. She feels burdened by expectations; she's not a real Vosnian Seeker, she's not even a real Cybertronian in the way that counts— she is a freakish amalgamation of human memories and a soul stuffed into a shell made new especially for her, despite her having had no say in the matter... Or, at least, that's what she thinks. Those closest to her think she's a miracle and are thrilled to still have her, indefinitely now. Before when she was human, SS had been frustrated and genuinely afraid of feeling anything remotely positive towards her, because of how tragically short human life spans are (and his fears had been proven valid when she was killed). Now he has Marian forever, and while coping with his own problems post-war, he cares for her and teaches her how to be a noble Seeker.
YIPPEEEEEEE
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mooncalfe-art · 25 days
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Oh.
Just remembered an important topic that I forgot to address last time.
What really happened to Big Lita and Renet? ( especially to Big Lita, seeing what happened to her past self. ).
What are the ramifications of that?
Are they ...gone for good?
And...is Lita going to be human from now on?
In an earlier story draft I had Renet and Big Lita more explicitly die, they were eaten by Armaggon, but during the writing process we decided to change their fates to being more ambiguous. In my mind they're both gone, but maybe another writer will have it so they escaped at the last minute through a portal or something like that, so you never know! Even if they did get eaten, maybe their molecules could reconstitute somehow. ;)
For Little Lita, I actually drew her as a turtle in that final scene initially, the original art has her as a mutant, the implication being that when Donatello destroyed Future Bob's QNA-absorption device, the QNA went back into the universe where it belonged, but eventually I decided no, it shouldn't be that easy. Lita should bear the scars of what happened and the QNA that encodes her mutation should remain inside Future Bob so he'll always remember. However, we've already seen Big Lita as a mutant arrive from a point in time after she's been de-mutated, and in keeping with the causality loop stuff in my final arc that must mean that somewhere along the line during the 20+ intervening years, she's re-mutated. Maybe we'll see that story someday.
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gamesception · 3 months
Text
Sception Reads Cass Cain #36
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Batgirl (2000) #16 - July 2001 Writer: Puckett Pencils: Scott Inks: Campanella Colors: Wright
Another solo one shot, another resonant and memorable stand alone story that Cass fans from back in the day will remember clearly. Got a bit more time to work with, gonna try and pull some more images this time, because the art in this one is just really good. Honestly, this issue is peak early days Batgirl - the kind of story she was literally made to tell, and it's really well executed. If I had to pick a single issue of Cass's entire Batgirl run as sort of a 'this is what she's all about' encapsulation for someone completely new to Cass and her book, this would be on the short list. If you've never read her ongoing before, i strongly recommend you actually read the issue for yourself before the summary here.
The issue opens on a bunch of kids playing a mean game where they throw a rat in the air and get points if it lands in a circle they drew on the ground. The nerd in my has to point out that it's kind of unrealistic. Rats aren't quite as fall resistant as, say, cats, but while they could be hurt or maybe even killed by a fall from only as high as a grade school kid could throw them, most are going to scamper away and none are going to land so badly that they splatter like a water balloon.
Anyway, it's gross and its cruel but also kind of cute as the kids argue about the rules and 'nuh uh' each other, and Scott draws their faces really expressively, and the whole scene starts with a rat silhouetted in front of the moon mid toss in an image that's as aesthetically compelling as it is disturbing in context before plummeting back down
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I could talk about how Cass is flying high through the city as Batgirl while her mental state is hurtling towards a painful crash, but that's probably reading too much into it.
Anyway, after the first splat there's this kind of cool sequence where the next kid throws the rat up and they all run back and look down at the circle...
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Only the rat never comes down, and when they look up like 'where did it go?' there's Cass
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The image of Cass swooping down from above with the kids all looking up is pretty cool, and the way the panels create a pacing for the scene is really good. Effective storytelling through sequential art.
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Cass drops down, and the kids scatter. Not a situation that needs any more intervention then that, and we get a nice panel showing just her hands and feet as she crouches down to gently let the rat go. A pretty standard inverse kick-the-dog moment to establish Cass as the good guy by having her be nice to an animal, but for those who have been reading along from the first issues of her book it also reminds us of how Bruce once praised her for being 'gentle', and how despite everything that's happened that part of her is still in there.
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As the other kids scatter, one stays behind to kick off the main plot for the issue. I like how awkward Cass is here, towering over this kid when she's used to being around allies and enemies taller than herself, not knowing how to talk to him.
Also, I haven't talked about it in a bit, but I just really love the way Scott draws Cass as Batgirl? Her proportions with her big head emphasizing her youth. The way you can make out her expressions despite the full face mask - and the way he gives her the same expressions that he gives Bruce. Her prominent jaw line making her feel tough and defiant and stubborn. The way you can make out her expression through the mask, the sleek lines of how her cape drapes from her neck to the point shoulders and then down, or the way the cape flows when he draws her in motion, all with an oil-slick feel that likely owes as much to Campanella's inking as to Scott's pencil work.
There are aspects of how others draw Cass in her batgirl suit that I like - most recently I love how Leonardo Romero draws the pointy ears on her cowl in the recent Birds of Prey run, it gives Cass a retro feel that really fits his vintage newspaper comic aesthetic. But Scott's version of Cass-as-Batgirl is always how I'll see the character in my mind.
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The kid, Tim, takes Cass back to his home, a messy apartment with a mattress just dropped on the floor. You can feel the poverty, and start to form an image of this kid's dad in your head as, like, a decent man pushed into crime by desperation to provide for his kid.
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An impression that Tim then explicitly reinforces.
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The scene cuts to the bank mid robbery, and we meet someone who seems to fit the mold - Jake. The way Scott draws Jake's expressions, you can tell he doesn't want to be there, and when asked what he's going to do with the money they steal, he just says he's going to pay some bills. But when a security guard surprises them, Jake is startled and shoots him, almost by accident....
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The boss, Chaco, compliments Jake on the kill, rubbing in how this isn't a guy who would normally do something like that with the 'didn't think you had it in you' line, and as they walk away you can see how horrified Jake is at what he's done.
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In contrast, Chaco shows just how comfortable he is with killing by shooting one of his own guys point blank when he realizes the guy was stealing traceable jewelry from the vault, the way the panel suddenly goes red, and Chaco's calm expression just the panel before, emphasizing how sharp and sudden the violence is.
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Chaco's a professional. Ruthless and dispassionate, about the job, about killing, even with his allies. He clearly didn't even feel any malice towards the guy he shot - he was downright friendly with all of his crew, even Jake, just a few panels ago, and that friendliness was probably even genuine. But this guy became a liability, and Chaco doesn't have any time or pity for liabilities.
It's around this time that they notice Jake is missing. More liabilities.
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A couple of the crew find Jake in an alley, overwhelmed by guilt over killing that security guard, and again, I just have to say, the art in this issue is really good. The perspective in that first panel looking down, with the shadows stretching forward guns first, the expressions on Jake and the guy who has a gun drawn on him, the detail on the background cobblestones & brickwork. All really good.
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Anyway, this is when Cass shows up, in terrifying shadow form, knocking out the two goons with the guns in as many panels.
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Cass sees Jake, like us assumes he's Tim's dad, and takes pity on him. For Tim's sake.
But Jake is overwhelmed by guilt.
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Guilt is one thing Cass understands.
Tim wanted Cass to stop his dad before he did something bad, something he wouldn't be able to forgive himself for, something Tim wouldn't be able to forgive him for. But Cass was too late. Once again, she's failed.
Only, Tim isn't Jake's son.
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He's Chaco's son.
Chaco the remorseless killer. Chaco who can be friendly one moment and commit murder the next. Cass wasn't too late to stop Tim's dad from doing something bad, Tim's dad had been bad the whole time.
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And bad dads are also something Cass understands.
I need to take a step out of the story for a moment here though to talk again about how Scott draws Cass, and in particular the bit about conveying her facial expressions through the mask. Scroll up a bit and look at the downcast resignation on her face when Jake says he has to pay for what he's done, then the surprise when he says he isn't Tim's father, and then the absolute fury here.
The expressions are so vivid, and carry so much of the load when it comes to conveying Cass's thoughts and emotions and personality.
Bringing back another old chestnut of this blog, Cass can speak now, and think in words and sentences, but there are no thought bubbles or narration blocks in the entire issue. The book just doesn't need them, not when Scott's Art is able to put everything going on in these characters heads right on their faces.
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Cass lays into Chaco, stopping only when she realizes he's already unconscious, and you can feel the sharp snap of her attacks in how the panels are layed out.
Bringing back another old chestnut, the action panels are practically perfunctory. They're there, and they're good, but there's no back and forth, there's never any question of the bank robbers so much as landing a hit on Cass. Who will win in a physical fight was never where the story's tension was. It was all about the emotional stakes.
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Tim arrives on scene just in time to see his dad carted off on a stretcher to the hospital, and as Cass takes him home he looks back, through the spikes on her gauntlet, as through through the prison bars that are going to separate him from his father for the rest of his life.
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And the last page is this somber, heartbreaking moment of Cass trying to console Tim that just because his father is a bad person, doesn't mean he is too, and it's obvious that Cass is thinking about herself and David Cain here, but while I might be reading too much into the panel, the way Cass's shadow forms Bruce's symbol to me draws attention to the fact that Cass has two fathers, and just because one of them isn't a murderer doesn't mean he isn't also bad.
...
So yeah, this really is more or less the archetypal Cass Cain Batgirl (2000) issue. A somber, contemplative tone. Street level / no super-villains or over the top scenarios. A focus on the individual humanity of the minor characters, including criminals who would be faceless mooks in any other bat book. Story and characterization conveyed through expressive artwork and deliberate panel use rather than blunt narration, taking advantage of the specific strengths of the comic medium. Violence and action scenes sharp, short and snappy rather than heavily drawn out, with the main conflict grounded in personal and emotional stakes. Narrative themes - guilt, parenthood - that tie directly back to Cassandra's core themes, history, and character motivations. All concisely contained within a single issue episode that works as a stand alone story.
Although there might be a bit too much emphasis on the stand alone part. Sometimes Cass's stories do come back to be referenced again later, we'll have an example of that next week, but we never see Tim again, we never see Cass following up or checking on him which is kind of a shame.
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been having a hyper-fixation swap with a friend (I got to show her Milgram and she got to show me Murder Drones) I really enjoyed the show so I drew a sketch book spread while we talked about it.
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↓rambling about the show/art↓
it was a fun show I enjoyed it :) it’s so visually striking!!! I love the aesthetics , colours and just like the shapes? Of everything are so good! Kinda in two minds about the humour but I think I like it overall and I also think most of my gripes with it were probably because the show writers were still getting used to writing the show since it was exclusively in the earlier episodes I felt that the humour was a tad off balance and I definitely found alot of the jokes absolutely hilarious I especially liked all the background/pause and read gags like on posters , uzi’s rail gun plans and such.
I love N he’d my favourite I also really like cyn too she’s such a unique villain , I quite like Uzi as well and I’m contractually obligated to like J since same name!
episode 7 was an absolute banger and my favourite episode I’m lucky I got into the show a few days ago and didn’t have to wait ages for it.
I got given a travel journal by my uncle ages ago since he thought I could use the decorative paper for sketch booking so thats where the decorative paper comes from.
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