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essekthelysssideblog · 2 years

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Re: the forearm squeeze. The take I've seen floating around these days is that Caleb was out there doing his damned best to honeypot Essek while Essek's demi ass was just happy to have a study buddy, and I concede that that IS a very funny and not-completely-inaccurate way of framing early Shadowgast.

HOWEVER, I don't think that's the full truth of it. Liam, at least, has said of the forearm squeeze that Caleb genuinely was trying to comfort Essek and did feel badly about the group pushing him to his limits. And Essek did not respond well to that! He saw Caleb openly trying to ingratiate himself to Essek and did not tolerate it!

I think what the "Essek was oblivious to Caleb's honeypotting" takes miss is that while Caleb was certainly attracted to Essek from early on, it was never anything that he acted on in either an obviously romantic or sexual way. For all that the joke now is that Caleb is a bisexual maelstrom, and for all that that is true in its way, the other truth is that especially during that period of time, Caleb had repressed his romantic/sexual interests extremely hard (see everything about his attraction to Jester and how that played out).

So while the manipulation and the attempts to impress Essek were definitely there along with the attraction, I don't think it's so much a case of Essek "missing" Caleb's advances out of demisexual naivete (a narrative I resent a bit, to be honest); rather I think on Essek's end, he WAS aware that Caleb was trying to ingratiate himself to him, and was cautious of that, but ultimately was won over because beyond Caleb's attempts at manipulation, there was also genuine shared interest and chemistry between them.

In other words, imo, early Shadowgast wasn't a case of Caleb trying and failing and then eventually succeeding to seduce Essek. It was a case of two people who are very cautious and distrustful and manipulative by nature feeling each other out and realizing that they genuinely enjoy each other's company, and, eventually (very eventually, as it turns out) figuring out a balance between them that accounts for the complicated relationship they each have with intimate relationships.

#shadowgast #critical role #mine #meta #essek thelyss #caleb widogast #maybe this is really obvious and we're all just joking around #but idk man i really do kinda resent the idea that essek had NO idea what caleb was doing #because asexuals are just idiots when it comes to sex i guess #both essek and caleb were EXTREMELY aware that the other might be manipulating them #that was the whole POINT!

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mithrilwren · 8 months

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Chapters: 5/7 Fandom: Critical Role (Web Series) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Post-Canon, Moving In Together, Angst with a Happy Ending, Lack of Communication, Fluff and Angst, navigating the ins and outs of a new relationship is tough, especially when you’re two wizards who are too used to being on their own, Festivals, Cats

Summary: The world has quieted in the wake of the Chained Oblivion’s defeat, and Caleb and Essek finally settle down together in Rexxentrum. Essek struggles to adjust. Caleb just wants him to feel safe in their new home.

3. Companions

After a year and a half, guess who's finally back to finish this story :)

#critical role #shadowgast #cr fic #shadowgast fic #my writing #i genuinely did not think id ever finish this #especially not after all this time #but i dragged the motivation out of my body this week #and im really glad i did #even if nobody remembers this story anymore im just happy to have finally finished it #it was hanging over me all this time #and its a relief to see it through to the end

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grumpytressym · 1 year

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Infinite Possibilities

I finished this and decided to finally post it.

#critical role fanart #critical role campaign 2 #the mighty nein #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #shadowgast #critical role art #my art #this took so long #I spent too much time on all the fun patterns #really happy with this ngl

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luckthebard · 1 year

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I’m glad my Andreas Pietschmann, Caleb Widogast fan cast post wasn’t as niche as I thought BUT

It’s also important to note that he’s technically too old to play Caleb. Dude looks great but he’s 53. Even in Dark he would have been late 40s.

So I maintain he’s a great mental Caleb Widogast image but I’m also hoping this will make people realize that when you image Caleb 20 years from the end of canon living with Essek he’s not, like, an Old Man. I’ve seen so many fics with 53 year old Caleb being described as totally grey and elderly, and like, maybe now we can look at Mr. Pietschmann as a more realistic reference for someone in their 50s

#caleb widogast #I swear sometimes I have to back out of post-canon Shadowgast fics #because Caleb is stated to be 50 something and then described looking like 70 #and I crumble into dust #please I’m begging you all 50 really isn’t that old

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soldier-poet-king · 6 months

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well. i finally did it. i finally watched the cr2 denouements/finale that i'd been putting off for more than a year, more than two years, technically. i have problems with endings. with uncertainty. with grief and letting things go, and experiencing things 'at the right time'. i'm not sure if this was the right time, but it feels right, it doesn't feel devastating. to end this story that i started watching during one of the worst points in my life. i'm. i'm. of course i miss it. part of me always will! and still. it was a good story. nothing will ever fill the same niche. that's ok.

#im literally #eating glass. but it's ok #cr lb #anyway back to cr3!!!!#which while not hitting the same heartspace #is still very fun #im not very far into it #less than halfway #im at the part where erika is a guest #so like most of the major ruidus plot stuff hasnt happened yet #they JUST met fearne's mom #that being said. i am v attached to orym. and ashton. and laudna. so i KNOW some good shit is coming down the line #liam/marisha/taliesin pcs always just. get me. my beloveds #i really miss the m9 tho #i sleep with the m9 quilt rae made me every night #it's the topmost blanket on my bed. always. i have very many blankets on my bed. i am always cold. but this is the best one #i miss caduceus and caleb most of all. shadowgast too ofc.#the grief and the guilt and the letting go. and the faith and the vocation and the purpose. the life's work. the peace. the regrowth and ho #*hope. the family. the love. the adventure #i am trying to transform that into smthn real. it is hard. i am tired and useless. but i am trying. and trying to convince myself that i am #i am young. that i have so much ahead of me still. hopefully #that potential. that ability. the /capability/ for that goodness and change. tho i feel like caleb carrying grief and guilt #and cad alone in the grove. desperately pleading for a sign an instruction from his goddess. reckless in that desperation #i still have the two m9 specials but i am saving them. for later

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widogastc · 2 years

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essek thelyss realizes he loves caleb widogast the day he walks away from him in a coast city. essek then realizes he is in love with him the day caleb reminds him to breath. he figures out it's mutual somewhere in aeor and resigns himself to wait with a bittersweet smile on his face while he watches a griefing woman punch the earth while two men kneel before her with sorrow in their eyes. he dares to hope that maybe he wont have to wait for long when he get a kiss to the cheek and a hug, and yet, he finds he doesn't mind either way. for to love caleb widogast would be the best decision he'd keep taking for the rest of his life and in every other infinity possibilities.

#essek thelyss #shadowgast #as u can see i am itching to write character studies yet unable to bc brainworms !!!! too strong !!!#life is a mess rn so all i can muster are these snipets of babbling nonsense. i really want to disect these mfs like sooo badly tho #i am working myself to it !!!#anyway #cr #txt #shadowgast disease #meta.rot #hc.land

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foldybikes · 1 year

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love that veth finds the time to be horny about flesh-abomination lucien's abs in the middle of the penultimate m9 fight. she said thirsty women rights and she's so right.

#ngl veth being unabashedly turned on by certain npc's and going to town on her husband whenever she sees him has made me so fond of her #get it girl live your best life #she and yeza are my favorite couple in cr2 which is impressive since basically all the pc pairings are bomb af #but even shadowgast can't stand against the charm of a little chaotic mom wanting to absolutely rail her husband daily #it also really helps that yeza is the SWEETEST husband ever #once again: matt and sam husband and wife of the year #critical role #critical role spoilers #cr2 #m9 #mighty nein #c2e140 #foldycr

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tarydarrington · 2 years

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📆 and 🤩 for the fic recs meme? (Also thanks for all the recs--I'm newish to the fandom and really appreciating them!)

Ahh yay, I’m glad to be helpful, welcome to the fandom!! <3

📆 A fic you’d re-read 10 years from now

path of the traveled sun by mousecookie/ariande-mouse!

🤩 A fic that made you SLAM that “subscribe” button

I have a terrible memory for how I found certain writers tbh, but I’m relatively sure that this ficlet set during the end of c2e136 was an immediate slam of the follow button for the author (whose current WIP Gravity, and all that’s born within is absolutely fantastic)

#path of the traveled sun contains a line that bodied me so thoroughly that it colors how i think of campaign 2 and its themes as a whole #along with a really great take on verin's dynamic with essek and the rest of the nein #featuring a very cute fjorester baby and some very sweet background shadowgast #the c2e36 ficlet was one of the first i read when i was getting into shadowgast fic and is a very good essek study #and gravity and all that's born within has a very nuanced and thoughtfully explored take on caleb and essek post-canon #the way they still have to figure each other/themselves out and build trust between them #i am behind on it unfortunately but what a masterpiece #asks #anonymous #ask games #fic rec #thanks for asking! 💜

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hello-eeveev · 2 months

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Rated T, 3331 words

When he was a block away from home, Caleb felt a ping from the wards on his house. Someone had teleported inside. Only a select few were permitted to teleport within the walls of his home, and as far as he knew, only one had the capability. His heart skipped a beat and he quickened his pace, fighting to keep the grin from his face as he rounded the corner onto his street, hurried to his door, and opened it to the most welcome sight he had seen in weeks.

Essek stood in the living room, turned away. His hand rested on the back of the couch, and the edges of his travelling cloak rustled in the sudden shift of air. He looked over his shoulder at Caleb’s entrance. The early evening light shone over his nose and hair and cheekbone, casting the edges of him in gold. He smiled.

“Hello, Caleb Widogast.”

#it's here!!! the final chapter!!!#I'm getting really emotional about this lol #this is the longest fic i've written and i'm so proud of it #this chapter especially is one of my favorites i'm so happy to finally share it with you all #eve’s writing #how to rest #critical role #shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #cr fic

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orcelito · 2 years

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Critical role 2 episode 97 more like I am losing my FUCKING mind

#speculation nation #cr2 spoilers/#i just finished the episode and like. can you IMAGINE watching this live?????#veth getting her body back. the Essek Reveal. that entire shadowgast speech???????#ive seen fanart of caleb saying that but holy shit lmfao #and the FOREHEAD KISS??? HELLO??????#i can just feel Jester processing that & deciding to push them together in EVERY other interaction after #she Already kinda has when she was like 'you two were in there for a While huh 😉' when they were spell developing #just. hfkshfkdhfjd what an episode. What An Episode.#im almost to episode 100 and shit's really fucking rolling. kinda crazy seeing where it all goes lol #god i fucking love this show

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essektheylyss · 6 months

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I will be honest, I had "protective shadowgast content" on my notably unlikely and somewhat facetious wishlist for the one-shot, to the point that I was only saying it in jest in DMs, because I really did not expect nor need it, and I'm still in shock that what I got was Caleb going from "Trent is below 'grounding my godson' on the list of priorities right now, get the fuck in line, bitch" to "I should've ripped out his fucking spine with my dinosaur teeth" in two seconds flat the moment Trent even referenced Essek.

Like, we all saw that, right? I feel like I gotta confirm I'm not actually having a jet lag-induced fever dream.

#critical role #cr spoilers #shadowgast #I'm not gonna lie i was definitely sitting there between the show and the broadcast like 'did other people see that. was that real.'#i think i messaged the-littlest-goblin at break like 'HELLO??? WE ALL JUST WITNESSED THAT RIGHT???'#it was not in so many words but the incredulity was STRONG

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aeor-is-for-reccing · 1 month

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MODERN AU: A Shadowgast Rec List

This week, we have modern AU! Check under the cut for a whopping 24 fics that all take place in modern times, and don't forget to comment and kudos if you like them!

LOVE & OTHER ENCHANTMENTS by LivThael (2092, General) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

An imagined review and synopsis of a movie about a Shadowgast modern-setting bookstore AU.

Reccer says: Hilariously awful, I say with great love, and by that I mean it purposefully and artfully swan dives out of the AU tree and hits every trope on the way down. This was written to be as cursed as possible, and Liv really delivers both that and non-stop laughs. This is clearly a love letter to terrible romcoms, cliché fanfic tropes, and the Shadowgast fandom as a whole. A+ satire, PLEASE read this!

like 80/20 on the kinsey scale by jakia (2772, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb bangs his hot TA and panics about it the next day. Beau did not sign up for listening to this.

Reccer says: Caleb -- who's only dated women before -- discovers he LOVES the D.

ask to be unbroken by chaotic_geeky (40038, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes, Unfinished Cliffhanger

Caleb gets a last minute chance to be a photographer at a big runway event. He meets the star model at the afterparty, and things go from there.

Reccer says: The premise is great, the story is excellent, and the characters are enthralling. It does end on an unfinished cliffhanger, but the beginning is so good it's worth it.

Fundamental Forces Other Than Gravity by mllekurtz (TheKnittingJedi) (40676, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

How cold, ruthless and lonely Essek Thelyss (a brilliant student with a secret) accidentally makes some friends and falls in love: a Shadowgast college AU.

Reccer says: This is a fantastic college AU! And the characterization is done so well it's phenomenal.

a smile is more than showing teeth by thought (13642, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

"you are welcome in Zadash should that be an option for you," Caleb had written, "and I would be pleased to set aside a few days to work with you in person." Or How to seduce your academic pen pal through basic kindness, stolen sweaters, and books. Mostly books.

Reccer says: This is the start of an incredible AU with two more after it in the series. I love this version of Essek and Caleb falling in love. SO MUCH.

Paradigm Shift by full_time_dreamer_behold (114291, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb joins a law firm. He meets Essek, the IT manager. Things happen. They fall in love

Reccer says: It's a super sweet slow burn!! Essek and Beau have a really fun dynamic and the budding romance is very satisfying.

(your face in my hands is) everything good i need by mllekurtz (25884, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Academics Caleb and Essek are nerds and fall in love over the course of a conference

Reccer says: I liked it!

like colored indigo inscribed with my name by KmacKatie (kmackatie) (30648, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

An exploration of tradition, culture, what is worth sacrificing in finding yourself and family. Essek learns how to make a new family.

Reccer says: This is an incredible pic with a lot of beautiful world and culture building set into it. Though I love the idea that Essek knits, I am especially fond of the other handcrafts that the Dynasty may do culturally, and this one does such a great job with it. And the interpersonal relationships are absolutely incredible!

we learn to live with the pain, mosaic broken hearts by vegabondfirelily (5777, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Sometimes things don't go as planned. Caleb will always be there for Essek, though, even after a life-changing accident. Non-linear narrative, angst with a better ending

Reccer says: I love this pic, even if it makes me cry every time. It is emotional and brilliant.

the fire kept closest (burns most of all) by Mousecookie (21822, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: Major Character Death

Takes place on a modern Rumblecusp, Essek and Caleb are volcanologists. Absolutely bonkers genre mashup of scifi disaster thriller ghost story romance that somehow works. There is a MCD warning but it is also tagged as Happy Ending and that does come through!

Reccer says: The writing style is like watching a movie and it made me cry both sad and happy tears.

Starting with your heart (bright heart) by 2manyboys (9914, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek and Caleb have been taking showers together, but it's totally platonic, they swear

Reccer says: I liked it!

scene: a shift in tempo by hanap (6790, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek, first soloist of Rosohna Ballet, comes across the mountains in an exchange to be Caleb's new partner.

Reccer says: A beautiful fic! I love the way the AU fits our characters so beautifully, and how it honors ballet while also subverting it just a little. Gorgeous!

A King in Cat's Clothes by royalgreen (1544, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Frumpkin is extremely suspicious of this interloper Essek who keeps visiting Frumpkin's domain (the cat cafe) and sniffing around Frumpkin's human

Reccer says: Frumpkin's POV is utterly hilarious. He is so angry that Essek is sweetly romancing Caleb.

read between the lines (everything is gradual) by SpottedEnchanse (SpottedEnchants) (3047, General) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

A series in which Caleb owns a cat cafe. It's amazing.

Reccer says: SpottedEnchanse's writing can do literally no wrong ever. It's like flossing for the brain

the golden thread around your neck whispered visions of my undoing by MarsBar2019 (191412, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek is the CEO of an arcane tech company in Roshona where Caleb gets a job as his personal assistant.

Reccer says: A tense slow burn that's sexy as hell, one of my favourite fics.

Sleep, With Benefits by KmacKatie (62272, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb tries out his coworkers' mattress. That's definitely all and not that he has a major crush on Essek.

Reccer says: I liked it!

take chances by 06151126 (3021, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek left Formula One and came back, but his return isn't going well. He hires Caleb to help.

Reccer says: This is the second work in a series, and the whole thing is wonderful! Well written and honest, it's very cool to see how Essek and Caleb come together over the course.

Empire of Lights by mllekurtz (TheKnittingJedi) (17215, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Rosohnans call it the rainy season: a time of humid days, heavy showers, and suffocating heat. Caleb, who feels less and less like a stranger in the city he recently decided to call home, finds it's also a time for revelations.

Reccer says: This is a fantastic, sweet AU of our wizards getting together and I love it.

A mile high by Mousecookie (545, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Caleb and Essek (try to) get frisky in an airplane lavatory.

Reccer says: It's cute and funny.

The Kitchen Sink by mousecookie (17126, Mature) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek is a supermodel and Caleb is a jack-of-all-trades, and they keep meeting in increasingly unlikely circumstances. WIP with 6/12 chapters.

Reccer says: It's funny and the writing style is almost Pratchett-esque at times

The following fics each received 2 recs each!

Something to Believe in by AwesomeFroggy (108948, Teen) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Essek's mother sends him to Nicodranas as punishment, where unbeknownst to her he already has a friend. Jester thinks he'd really get along with her friend Caleb.

Reccer 1 says: I liked it! Reccer 2 says: This is an amazing incredible story! I love it so very much! The story is complete, though it is marked as one chapter left as no epilogue is out. Don't let that stop you from reading! I love every single second of this story so very much.

I’ve been lost before (and I’m lost again, I guess) by toneofjoy (165k, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

Rock climbing AU! Caleb is the new athlete to the gym and Essek takes over his training. Despite the specter of their pasts, feelings blossom.

Reccer 1 says: It's well written, most of the esoteric climbing stuff is explained well, and I really enjoy their characterizations. There's a good balance between the relationship-building and the climbing part. Reccer 2 says: This is top three Shadowgast stories ever. It's a wild, beautiful, heartfelt ride. It's worth every second of time it takes to read. Also, this will make you want to take up climbing or at least start watching climbing. It's so well written and enjoyable. Everyone should at least give it a try!

The Secret Romance of Caleb Widogast by Cardinal_Daughter (15680, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

All Caleb wants is a peaceful, romantic weekend alone with his boyfriend. The boyfriend none of his friends know about. Naturally, nothing goes quite as planned.

Reccer 1 says: a sweet and silly story where we get a glimpse of the absolute chaos of a M9 group chat Reccer 2 says: A fantastic AU with a brilliant sequel. I love it!

coping skills by eldritchmochi (251061, Explicit) Reccer's Content Notes: No Content Notes

BDSM fic for a disabled Essek and the trials he experiences

Reccer 1 says: There is so much good about this WIP! The depiction of both Essek’s disabilities and the kink community are so well done, and the characterization is super fun. Well written and super hot. Reccer 2 says: This is one of the best long fits out there for a modern prompt. It is an absolutely wonderful story, heartfelt and meaningful, and the characters have so much depth. And I'm a sucker for a well written chronic illness/chronic pain Essek, and this one is so realistic it walks the line to uncanny. I love this!

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast. Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week, we’ll be back with WIPS

#shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #critical role #cr fic recs #fan fiction rec list #aeor is for lovers #critical role fan fiction #cr fic #cr fics

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reilora-borealis · 8 months

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a shadowgast headcanon

I imagine that a short while after Caleb's death, Essek, who has seen a few members of the Nein die but has never been shattered by grief like this, who has been alone for so much of his life already, realizes how much longer he will have to be alone, and it breaks him.

He will never again set foot in the tower; try as he might to recreate it, it won't be the same. He understands better than anyone that magic can stop time, heal wounds, bring people back from the dead, but it's all just temporary. It's not natural, as Caduceus keeps reminding him over and over as he bargains. It's not what he would have wanted.

Worst of all, Essek knows - in that hopeless, irrational, melodramatic, fundamentally true way that a person knows things when they're grieving - that he will never love anyone in the same way ever again.

So, in a moment of weakness, for the first time in his almost 200 years of life, Essek casts find familiar.

Of course, there were the cats that Caleb kept in their cottage, plus the strays that he fed in the back garden. There were the dogs that Beau and Yasha adopted, the menagerie of critters Jester collected over the years and foisted upon all of their friends. But Essek knows none of them will be around for long. Compared to the lifespan of a drow, most pets are like mayflies. They will all leave too, sooner or later. Everything will.

He doesn't know what to expect, as he's casting the spell. He doesn't really have a shape in mind, he's just looking for something to take the loneliness away, anything, calling blindly into the dark to see what answers back. He thinks this is foolish, this exercise. He thinks he will never heal. He thinks of Caleb.

When he completes the ritual, he opens his eyes and there before him is a cat. A familiar brown Bengal tabby cat.

And Frumpkin climbs into Essek's arms. Because someone needed this fey spirit once, long ago, someone in pain. And even though Caleb set him free, he knows that someone new needs him now.

#something something what is grief if not love perservering #shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #critical role #the mighty nein #cr2 #~reiloriginals

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