Bakugou and Izuku's 'Friendship'
Or, what the fuck do you think friendship is?
For the purposes of this post, we're temporarily ignoring... their entire backstory, basiclly. For all intents and purposes, these two met in UA, there's no childhood trauma, no assaults, no demands that Izuku commit suicide, none of that. We're trying to take a look at the current 'friendship' between Izuku and Bakugou.
And, in that spirit, I want to say this: why, in the the name of burning fuck, do you call this a friendship?
No, seriously: I see these posts, here and elsewhere, with clips of, like, Bakugou yelling at Izuku so hard his hair is being blown back. Or hitting Izuku. Or insulting Izuku. And these posts say, unironically (unless I'm missing some weird ass trend) that these are 'Dawww' moment.
You know, like you would go when you see a cute kitten or something.
But it's worse than that, because the manga itself seems to support this; I'll never forget that picture of All Might smiling at Izuku and Bakugou fondly as Bakugou yells his head off, absolutely losing his shit like a bratty five year old, while Izuku is just patiently trying to fight through the torrent of verbal vomit and get to the other side.
Dawww.
Bakugou screaming his head off less than a foot from Izuku's head, probably causing permanent hearing loss? Adorable. Look at what great friends they are, you love to see it!
...I'm sorry? Is... is that what you think friendship is? Do you have a friend that just spends all their free time belittling you? No, I'm being serious: do you have a friend like that? Because, in all seriousness, if you do, I really want you to reassess that relationship.
But, I can almost hear someone say, me and my friend mock each other all the time! Or, maybe, my friend calls me an idiot or some such, but they mean it affectionately!
....Alright, let's break this down a little. A good, healthy relationship, a friendship, whatever, is give and take. You get something out of it, and the other person gets something out of it. It's built off connections, something that bind you together, and mutual trust.
Let me put it like this: let's say your friend calls you a name, and because of your history, that name, that may or may not seem insulting, is in fact not insulting, but instead references your history together. Do they use your actual name? Or does using it cause them almost physical pain, to the point they've only used it once in literal years?
Or this: you fight with your friend. Or berate them. Or something like that. Do you... stop? Do you do something with them other than that? Do you yell at them, just... flat out scream at them, on the top of your lungs? Is all that you do yell at them?
Do you hurt your friends? And I'm not talking about friendly punching: do you throw frozen snowballs at their head? Do you impale them with sharp metal objects?
Yeah... that's the thing with Bakugou's 'friendship' with Izuku: there's no actual friendship to it. Bakugou insults and attacks Izuku, and in response he.... puts up with it. All friendships are different, sure, but there is a line, where things cross over into cruelty or abusive behavior: I have a friend who I mock, and I would never do to them what Bakugou does to Izuku all the fucking time. Ever. I hope with all sincerity that if I did what Bakugou does? That someone would slap me, because that is not OK.
More than that, though, is the fact that a good friendship should be more than that: even good hearted ribbing can be hurtful if it happens too much. When does Bakugou stop? When has Bakugou interact with Izuku in a healthy way? When have they just had a conversation, one where he isn't yelling, that's not loaded with hurtful subtext from the past, or with Bakugou demanding something from Izuku, anything like that? When do they.... play video games, or engage in some sort of activity together? And, before anyone says something, that is not part of the training they do as part of their school, as ordered by their teacher, because that doesn't actually count (not that he does that then, either).
And, on that topic.... 'But Bakugou saved Izuku's life!'. Well. First off that entire situation, as I've said before, is stupid forced bullshit to railroad Izuku into needing to be saved at all, while somehow giving Bakugou enough time to save him (even though Izuku could... save himself in that situation, since Bakugou had all this time to fly over?), all while making him act OOC, in that 'He's totally redeemed, guys!' way Hori loves, to make him save Izuku at all!
But let's ignore that. Let's say that, actually, Bakugou just saved Izuku in a normal way. Here's the thing: saving people is, in fact, his actual job. It doesn't matter if it was Izuku, or Bakugou's mom, or some random scrub off the street: Bakugou's actual job, as a hero, is to save people. Him doing it is something that deserves acknowledgement, sure (if only because of how wildly out of his usual behavior patterns that is), but it's not a sign of friendship. The entire point of that, as Bakugou's 'growth', is that he grew enough to get past his ego to help other people like a hero should.
And, I swear to fuck, if you try to tell me Bakugou 'apologizing' to Izuku, insincerely by his own admission, after attacking him, is a sign of friendship? I really, really, really, want you to sit down, picture your friend leading a mob of people you trust to attack you, after you've spent days alone, fighting for your life against people trying to kill you, only for them to promptly apologize while saying 'it changes nothing'.
Think about that, and think about how that would make you feel.
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Sorry for being so inactive lately... been busy irl, and have been meaning to post here more often, but also, like... I always feel a bit shy approaching the 'kin communities on here because it kind of feels like everyone is sort of... "internet poisoned"? For lack of a possibly-better word. A lot of folks here on tumblr in the 'kin and alterhuman communities are children, and a lot of more prominent community figures treated like "elders" are only about my age or younger, and it feels really strange, to be honest.
There's a lot of discussion of feelings and terminology, but very little "lifestyle"? It's like there's a universal expectation for everyone to just figure everything out on their own; you get some definitions here and there yeah, but the amount of variance says much more loudly "just figure out what it all means on your own, pal". ex. Not only can no one actually explain what "otherhearted" actually means sans relation to otherkin, but it feels like I never see anyone talk about dealing with what one could call "kin feels" in the workplace, when unable to acquire your habitat, etc... Othercon is online-only, and while I'm pretty sure I'd be unable to attend an in-person event, part of me has a hard time feeling like everyone is really taking it all seriously and is really unafraid of being "cringe" when obviously it's so much easier to act like you're so confident online. I kinda feel like meeting some wolfkin stereotypes in a park for snacks and doing a group howl would do more for me than years of reading essays on tumblr ever has.
I dunno, I tried watching a recording of an Othercon panel I felt would be relevant and useful to me once, and was floored at just how... utterly useless it was. Despite its promising title, it was just shallow "you're valid" garbage and internet discourse... Makes me feel severely alienated, to be honest.
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it's so significant to me that do you believe in miracles paralleled all hell breaks loose specifically. because ahbl is the first time dean violates sam's autonomy to bring him back to life. it shows the extreme lengths that dean will go to protect sam, and despite all the other times dean has ignored sam's personhood in his pursuit to keep him alive, this is the moment in the show that fully exemplifies just how codependent these two really are, because there's an entire season dedicated to the consequences of that codependency.
so for dybim to take that imagery and scenario and reverse the roles means that this is supposed to be just as indicative of their codependence. it's a threshold that will have major consequences because sam crossed over the point of no return. there's no going back from choosing unhealthy codependency with your brother, the show is signaling. dean is sam's ultimate decision—he doesn't choose himself, he doesn't choose independence, he chooses dean, and all that that entails. he probably only realizes that all of his posturing about autonomy was a lie at the very moment he says it out loud, but once he's finally honest with himself it's a done deal. just like dean can never go back from his deal for sam's life, sam can never return to any point before this moment. he's in this relationship for good, and he wants to be codependent with dean; that's his decision.
and this is why soul survivor hurts so bad. because dean, like sam in season 9, declares that they're not family, not brothers. the role reversal continues, and sam is now suffering all of the pains he unwittingly put dean through by trying to maintain boundaries between them. now that he's realized he can't handle having those boundaries, any distance between him and dean is too much. here sam is, violating dean's autonomy and saving him against his will, just like dean has done to him so many times before. here he is, listening to dean reject him over and over again, like a parody of all sam's attempts to extricate himself from dean. he's on the other side now, staring down his brother and seeing his past self within him.
9.23 to 10.03 is just a speedrun of the previous 8 seasons but in reverse, with sam enduring the suffering of being in dean's position. and how tragic is it for sam to finally commit to his codependent relationship with dean, only for dean to leave him the moment it happens? how must that feel, for him to finally return his brother's feelings in all their toxic and fucked up glory, only to lose him in the worst way? to have all of his own words shouted back at him with the cruel intent to hurt—jesus christ. how am i supposed to cope with this in any normal way?
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I'm actually so sick and fucking tired of people who think covid is comparable to the flu. Just bc you or a family member got it and didn't die doesn't mean it's not super fucking serious and life threatening, ESPECIALLY for disabled people/people with health issues/autoimmune disorders. Every time my father sees me wearing a mask he rants about how covid is just like the flu and that everyone is over reacting and [insert shitty conspiracy theory here] and it makes me so upset every goddamn time. I got covid half a year ago, despite doing everything right, thanks to my parents' stupidity. I was sick for 13 days, entirely bedridden and feverish for 9 of those days. I physically couldn't get out of bed, not even to piss, the entire first day my mother had to half carry me everywhere. Same thing the second day, when she dragged me to the doctor where I tested positive. The first five days, I couldn't even look at an electronic device and had to keep the lights off all the time bc I'd actually vomit. I had a migraine that didn't go away no matter what medicine I took, for the entire the first week. My nose was constantly stuffy and my sinuses were so backed up I couldn't breathe through my nose, which made breathing in general so difficult and painful bc my asthma was also exacerbated. So my chest hurt too. All my normal chronic pain was magnified tenfold. I had a 103 fever for three days in a row, then it fluctuated between 98-100 the rest of the time. Thinking about it right now I still remember the pain and how it felt. I've had strep throat, a lot as a kid. I've had chicken pox, and the flu several times, because my parents never fucking vaccinated us. I have never been more sick in my goddamn life than I was with covid. And this is just me. Yes I'm disabled and yes I'm still being tested for possible autoimmune disorders (my mom and her whole side of the family have them) but even still I'm not nearly as at risk as a lot of people, and I was still more affected than anyone in my entire family, who have all also gotten covid because of their own stupidity. My taste and smell were never affected, but I'm still losing hair from it, which is apparently also a symptom I never knew about.
Wear. Your fucking. Masks. Covid is still around, it's still super fucking serious, it is NOT just like the flu, and you had fucking better take it seriously. Even if you don't care about getting it yourself, at least show some goddamn consideration for others whose health and lives are at risk.
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By the kickstarter stickman, I mean the one that shows up in this video, it’s the first 36 seconds, afterwards it’s just Alan explaining kickstarter stuff.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwofhyizvnA
And as something to add to hangman, in response to a comment saying “Bruh for a moment I thought he was gonna start choking but guess not”, Alan replied with “yeah... we thought it might be too dark if he started choking”. They might not be choking but they could’ve been, just an idea to chew on <3
i keep forgetting that Alan made ava 1 when he was like, 13, it's so unreal seeing his face in that video because what the fuck this guy is a full-on adult in current day. all the videos i see are more current day. what the hell who is that he looks my age or even younger that should NOT be allowed
no thoughts on the kickstarter stick in particular though. seems like a typical ava stick pre-current era. really love that he went a completely different direction for sc though.
and also. oh my god. yeah no i wonder why that would have been too dark <- deeply horrified by the idea of that
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