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therealcocoshady · 18 days

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Recovery - Chapter 36

Eminem x Female Reader Fanfiction

Synopsis : Reader and Em celebrate their first Thanksgiving together and she finally meets Kim.

MARSHALL’S POV

-FLASHBACK-

The last thing Marshall expected was to get married again. After his second failed marriage to Kim, he swore he was done with marriage, and that he was done with her. He still loved her very much but he had to admit it eventually : it was never going to work between the two of them. Letting go of her and of their relationship was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do (even getting sober seemed easier than this), but he knew he had to, at least for the sake of his daughters. Every time they got back together after a breakup, the girls got their hopes up and it was heartbreaking. Plus, they were growing up and already smarter than their parents. It wouldn’t take long for them to realize that they were struggling, constantly cheating on each other, abusing substances… They simply couldn’t keep going on like this. When he got out of the courthouse after their second divorce was final, he swore he would never get married ever again, much less get back with her. And yet, more than a decade after, he was standing in a chapel with Kim, a minister and Paul as their witness. It wasn’t your usual wedding. In fact, it could barely qualify as a wedding. There was no service, no white dress, no guests… It was probably the best kept secret in America. Save for Paul and the minister, no one knew they were tying the knot again, not even his daughters. In fact, they were the last people he wanted to find out. They would never understand why their parents were getting married again. The first time, they got married on a whim, right before a tour. Kim had pressured him to propose because she feared he would be unfaithful while on tour (which eventually happened). The second time around, he actually pressured her into accepting when he proposed on the occasion of the fifteenth anniversary of their first date, only to file for divorce after less than ninety days of marriage. This time, though, that had nothing to do with love. He was marrying Kim out of necessity. She had tried to off herself, once again and, this time, she almost succeeded. If paramedics hadn’t been remarkably quick to save her, she would have left four children behind. Marshall was distraught by the thought that his kids could lose their mother. He knew he had to step up and do something. Especially when he was the one to blame in the first place for her substance abuse.

Kim was a bit hard to convince this time, when he suggested they get married, but she ended up agreeing that it might make sense. If he was her husband, he would be able to make medical decisions and if, God forbid, something had to happen to her, it would be his responsibility to take care of her funeral, estate and her son’s upbringing. Otherwise, it would fall onto his daughters to do it all and care for Parker, but they were far too young for this. Kim didn’t love him anymore but she had always relied on him and his support when it came to her health, so she accepted. None of them were especially happy to tie the knot again but, at least, things would be taken care of.

They got married in the utmost secrecy, Paul being the only person they knew who was aware of the wedding. Of course, the manager tried to dissuade him from marrying Kim again, but to no avail. The whole thing was expeditive : it took ten minutes, both of them wearing sweat suits and sneakers, no rings, going their separate ways after. Him leaving for a studio session in California, her going back to her rehab center.

After that, they didn’t see each other for months, though they often spoke on the phone. They didn’t really mention being married again, save for a couple of jokes about how it might actually be their most successful attempt at a marriage. Maybe it was the best kept secret after all : you can be successful in marriage if you don’t love your spouse, don’t live with them and are only in this for practical reasons. They also didn’t really worry about a potential divorce. They had signed a prenup that would make it easy but they highly doubted it would come to that. They were pretty adamant about never getting married ever again (for real this time), to anyone else. They’d been broken up for a while and they didn’t love each other like that anymore, but they were in agreement that it would be unlikely for any of them to fall in love again, with anyone else. She wasn’t in a psychological state to date, and he was unavailable emotionally. As far as he was concerned, music was the only lady he was committed to, and he could make do with one night stands. When your relationships with women have been failures, you start to resign eventually. So he was at peace with his decision. It wasn’t like he wanted to be in a serious relationship with someone ever again anyway.

-END OF FLASHBACK-

He never really expected to regret marrying Kim for the third time. That was until Y/N walked in his life and things became more than serious between the two of them. At the beginning, even though he was head over heels in love with her, he sort of expected things to blow up between the two of them, so he didn’t bother telling her he was married. And sure enough, that’s what happened : they broke up because they were not in agreement when it came to the future, namely the topics of marriage and kids. He was distraught when she left but he didn’t blame her : she deserved to be happy and to have all her dreams come true. He knew he could not marry her and give her kids anyway. Letting her go was hard, but he loved her enough not to stand in the way of her dreams. But, by some divine miracle, she came back to him and their relationship got serious pretty fast. They even moved in together. He knew he probably should tell her, but he could never find the right time. First, they got back together, then some drama ensued when she learned that his assistant almost blew him a few days earlier, then they went on vacation with his family, then they almost broke up because he was a trauma-ridden asshole… He didn’t want to lie to her, but he also didn’t want to lose her. He could have gotten over his guilt by telling himself that no one else knew anyway, but when she mentioned him not being married to Kim anymore, he could barely ignore it. He knew he would have to tell her eventually, and hoped that she would understand. Because there was no way he could live without her. She was the one he wanted to grow old with. She might very well be the love of his life. So much so that, if he hadn’t been married to Kim, he might have considered proposing. That’s how in love he was. But for now, he could only pray everything would go well for their first holiday together.

Y/N’s POV

It was your first Thanksgiving with Marshall and you were happy to spend your first holiday together as a couple, after an eventful week. It was your first time seeing his brother and his family as an official girlfriend and, most of all, you were finally going to meet Kim. You knew you didn’t really have anything to worry about - Marshall had been pretty adamant - but you were starting to feel nervous as she walked through the door and you set your eyes on her for the first time. She was much taller than you, rather charismatic. There was something about the way she carried herself that made her sort of impressive.

Hi ! You must be Y/N ! I’m Kim. It’s so nice to finally meet you, she said in a friendly tone.

You too, you said shyly.

Marshall stroked the back of your hand before greeting her. Their daughters were here, as well as Parker, Kim’s son, which made things less awkward. Nate and his family arrived too and the house was soon filled. It was a laid back atmosphere and Marshall seemed happy to have the people he loved around him. He was joking around with his brother and his nephews, whom he hadn’t seen in a very long time. They also remembered you and seemed happy to see you.

Uncle Marshall ! Is it true that you have a girlfriend now ? Carter asked.

It’s true, Marshall beamed.

Hard to believe, huh ? Nate chimed in. The old man finally found someone to put up with him !

Where is she ? His nephew asked in excitement.

I’m right here, you chuckled.

Wait… I thought you were Hailie’s age, Liam asked with a hint of confusion in his eyes.

This is going to be fun, Nate said with a huge grin.

Everyone was staring at the two of you with smirks on their faces. You blushed a little. You absolutely weren’t ashamed of your age difference, but you knew Marshall was a little more prone to this feeling. Also, there was something a bit unsettling about a child confronting you about it.

Well, uh… I am Hailie’s age, you simply said. But sometimes, grown-ups fall in love with people who are a bit older. Or younger.

Yeah, but Uncle Marshall is like… really old, Carter said.

Why, thanks, buddy, Marshall replied with a grin. So you expected me to end up alone or…?

No ! I figured you’d make friends at the retirement home, Liam shrugged.

Everyone burst into a fit of laughter. Your boyfriend rolled his eyes and you could resist pecking his cheek. « I’m not that old » he muttered grumpily. Everyone hung out together and, once again, you proved bravery was not your strong suit. You methodically avoided standing anywhere near Kim. She was towering around six feet and you were feeling ridiculously small next to her. And she was definitely impressive, with some sort of mysterious aura. She was nice but, at the same time, keeping to herself and, whenever she spoke, she had some sort of sultry voice. For the first time ever, you felt conscious about your own voice and accent. Up until now, you had managed to stay sane and reasonable but you were starting to wonder what Marshall saw in you. You were not like Kim at all. Were you even his type…? Even Tracy had more in common with her. You, you were younger, nowhere near as charismatic either… To add to your misery, Kim even managed to make Marshall laugh. They obviously had their own inside jokes. Hailie, Alaina and Stevie seemed happy to spend the day with the two of them, though, and that was obviously the most important thing.

I have a present for you, Stevie told you. Well, you and Dad, actually.

I didn’t know we were supposed to exchange presents, you said shyly.

We don’t, she giggled. And it’s nothing fancy ! But I hope you like it !

She handed you a small bag and you sat on the couch to open it, Marshall by your side. It was a photo album of gorgeous pictures she had taken with a disposable camera during your family vacations in Europe. There were a lot of candid shots of you and Marshall, that you hadn’t noticed her taking in the moment. One of the pictures was printed out and put in a frame.

I thought you might want to have at least one picture of the two of you on display in the house, she said.

You hugged her, almost emotional. It was a really beautiful shot of the two of you in Capri. It was taken from the back and Marshall was holding you and kissing your temple. You had spent a day on the island while you were in Italy and you absolutely loved it. You looked at the pictures in the album, reminiscing of your time in Europe. Some of them were really cute and sweet : Marshall sleeping on your shoulder on the jet, you, Hailie and Alaina drinking mocktails in Italy… Everyone looked at the photo and the girls provided commentary.

We should really do this again, Alaina said with excitement. Europe was great !

It was, Marshall said with a smile. Maybe we could do that again.

You got this man to travel and actually enjoy it ?! Nate asked you in disbelief.

And she got him to reduce the amount of security, too, Stevie pointed out. We had a great time in Europe !

Who are you and what have you done to my brother-in-law ? Ashley joked.

Is it Thanksgiving or is it “Let’s make fun of Marshall” day ? Marshall asked with an eye roll.

Overall, you had a good day with everyone. You got to watch Marshall win his basketball game against Nate and everyone seemed to enjoy your cooking. Kim complimented you on your dish and joked that Marshall would definitely put on a few if you kept on feeding him french food. They joked around a lot and seemed like friends. In a way, they probably were. After all, Marshall had told you they met when he was fifteen and stuck together through thick and thin. After dinner, the whole family lounged in the living room, playing video games, drinking mocktails, talking… You had a great time with Nate, who made a point to call you his “favorite sister-in-law”, loud and clear right in front of Kim, who just rolled her eyes and pretended not to hear a thing. You didn’t really have the details, but you gathered they didn’t exactly get along. At some point, though, you realized that her and Marshall were nowhere to be seen. You did your best to appear unfazed. Once you were done, you stepped outside for some fresh air. You weren’t exactly big on gatherings and could feel a headache was on its way. You spotted Marshall and Kim talking from afar, seemingly having a serious conversation. At first, you didn’t think too much of it but jealousy poked its ugly head out when you saw her giving him a hug. You scoffed and went back inside, not willing to subject yourself to that. Hailie came to see you, making small talk.

I wonder where Mom and Dad are, she said. Have you seen them ?

I think they’re outside, talking, you replied with feigned ignorance. Do you want to go and get them ?

It’s fine, she said. They’ve been out a long time, though. They’re probably talking about Christmas presents or something like that.

You shrugged and quickly switched to another subject. The two of you went to the kitchen to make some tea and talk about what you could get Marshall for Christmas. She gave you a ton of ideas, which was pretty great. At some point, Kim and Marshall walked in and he chastised you for clearing the table and doing the dishes without him.

You could have let me do it, he groaned.

There it goes, Kim said playfully. Not a holiday unless Marshall gets grumpy.

Not an actual day if he doesn’t get grumpy, you said with a smirk.

Seems like you know him pretty well, she grinned.

I don’t like this, Marshall sighed before pulling you to him and kissing your temple.

They’re ganging up on you, Dad, Hailie warned.

At least my children are nice to me, he said.

Only because I need a favor, she said with a small smile.

I knew it, he said with faux exasperation. What do you want ? Or should I ask how much this is going to cost ?

Do you remember that one jacket that you had in one of your music videos ? I’d like to borrow it. We’re recording a new podcast episode soon and I have an outfit idea in mind, she said.

Don’t you have your own clothes, though ? He asked with a smile.

My followers love it when I pay tribute to you, she said. I’m merely indulging them. Please ? It’s Thanksgiving.

Fine, he shrugged. But I’m going to need more details because “that one jacket from that one video” is a bit vague, Hay.

Let’s just go look !

They went upstairs, leaving you alone with Kim. You were tempted to run away from the kitchen but it was impossible for you to do so without being painfully obvious. You were uneasy but she, on the other hand, seemed pretty comfortable. Why wouldn’t she, though ? She’d lived in that house for a while and she wasn’t new to the family either. She wasn’t the one out of place, here. You were.

It’s, uh… It’s cute that she’s paying tribute to him in the podcast, you commented in an attempt to make small talk.

It is, she replied with a smile. They have such a great relationship. He’s a great Dad.

Yeah, he’s a great person, you said honestly. The best.

You’re all gushing, she teased.

Sorry, you said awkwardly.

No, it’s sweet, she said. He’s really amazing so I’m happy he is with someone who sees it.

I mean, he’s always been incredible to me, since we met, you confessed.

About two years ago, right ? She asked with genuine interest.

That’s right, you said. Our relationship is more recent, though.

This, he told me, she chuckled. I probably shouldn’t tell you but he won’t shut up about you.

Really ? You asked with a raised eyebrow.

Oh, absolutely, she said. I think he even told me about you before you started dating. But that stays between us.

Only if you told me what he said, you replied with a smile.

The first time he ever mentioned you was when you had that incident at the bar, she said. He was pissed and worried. I could tell you meant a lot to him, by the way he talked about you.

Oh wow, you said. I wasn’t expecting him to tell you about this.

He doesn’t tell me everything, don’t worry, she chuckled. I happened to catch him on a day when he was pissed about it and he ended up telling me. But I could see he liked you. You know, it’s not often that he falls so hard for someone.

I guess I’m pretty lucky, you said.

I’d say he’s the lucky one, she pointed out. Seems like you gave up a lot to be with him. I mean, you moved to another country.

Yeah, well… He’s worth it, you said. I tried being without him and I didn’t like that.

I saw him when you were broken up and he didn’t like it too much either, she said. You’re good for him.

You think ? You asked with genuine curiosity.

Well, you’re the only woman who got him to do therapy, she pointed out. Tried for years and he never agreed to it.

You were surprised he told her about that, too. It was definitely weird, discussing your relationship with his ex wife, but her attitude put you at ease. It seemed like she genuinely wanted him to be happy.

I’m really happy for you guys, she continued. I also wanted to thank you for having me today. I mean, you could have refused to meet me or have me in the house at all, a lot of people would have, but you didn’t.

You debated telling her you couldn’t have put up much of a fight even if you had wanted to, since Marshall didn’t really give you a say in the matter.

You’re welcome, you said. It’s a family holiday, both of you should be able to enjoy it with your kids.

I’m really glad you see it this way, she said. It looks like we’ll be seeing each other a couple of times a year for a long time, so I’m really glad we get along.

You’re not at all like I imagined, you couldn’t help but say.

Meaning ? She asked with a grin.

I mean… You know. You’re nice.

She let out a hearty laugh and placed a friendly hand on your shoulder.

Did you expect me to be the mean ex-wife full of spite ? She asked with a smirk.

No… I mean… Kind of ? You explained sheepishly. For the record, no one spoke ill of you. But I figured… You know, there’s history. And usually, ex-wives and new girlfriends don’t get along.

Well, there comes a point in life where you just have to accept that things don’t work out, she said. I’ll be honest : I will always love Marshall. He has saved me in more ways than one. But I’m just not in love with him anymore, you know ? Now, we’re just rooting for each other to be happy. And if that’s any comfort, I was a bit anxious to meet you, too.

Were you ? You asked in surprise.

Of course ! He told me you were amazing, and I know the girls like you, but… you know. You’re still the first person he fell in love with after me. It’s the end of an era. I’m not proud of it, but I guess I sort of liked having this bond with him, she explained. But hey, I’m happy for you guys. I really am. I mean, you’re so much nicer than the last one I met anyway…

Who was it ? You asked with curiosity.

Tracy, she said as she rolled her eyes. I hate that woman.

Just like that, the two of you were like old friends. Proof that no one gets people closer than hating on the same person if there was ever a need for one. There was no real depth to it, just Kim feeding you old gossip and hating on Tracy. You were giggling like schoolgirls when Marshall walked back in the kitchen.

Everything alright ? Marshall asked with his eyebrows furrowed.

Yes, you said with a genuine smile.

I’m telling your lovely girlfriend what a terrible man you are. Just so that she knows what to expect, Kim said jokingly.

Marshall glared at her, obviously not amused by the joke and she simply shook her head before going back to the living room, leaving the two of you alone.

She didn’t say anything, you reassured him.

What’s with all the giggling then ?

Secrets, you chuckled. You’re right, she is pretty cool.

Mmmh, he said with a small frown.

He seemed pretty preoccupied, as if he were actually worried that Kim might let something slip. However, you didn’t pay it too much attention. You’d had a few talks about how abusive he’d been in the past, and you figured he just didn’t want you to be reminded of that, especially when you’d gone through a rough patch. You took advantage of no one being in the room to pull him in for a deep kiss.

I’m so in love with you, he said.

I love you too, you said. I’m so glad we’re celebrating our first Thanksgiving together.

Me too, he replied. I can’t even tell you how happy I am that you get along with my family. Nate told me earlier how great he thinks you are. You’re so perfect. I’m so blessed to be with you.

So… Am I on the list of what you’re thankful for ? You mused.

You are the list, he said before kissing your forehead.

The two of you went back to hang out with the others. Everyone was sitting on the couch while Stevie was showing them something on her iPad.

You guys are just in time for my yearly presentation, she said with a smile.

Shit, I thought I managed to miss it, Marshall chortled.

What presentation ? You asked.

Every year on Thanksgiving, Stevie tried to guilt trip us into adopting pets from the shelter she volunteers at, Nate explaied.

They need a home, she pointed out.

As long as it’s not my house, Marshall said with a grin.

We usually get out of it by donating a bunch of money, Alaina said.

You sat on the couch, curling on Marshall’s side as Stevie did her presentation, starting with dogs. Then, she got to cats and, as soon as you saw the first one, you fell in love. It wasn’t a cute kitten you would have expected to swoon over. It was a thirteen year-old cat with feline dwarfism that gave him a grumpy look. He had a few patches of missing hair and wouldn’t qualify as a beautiful cat but there was something about him that drew you in.

Oh my God, he is adorable, you said.

Adorable ? That… thing ? Marshall asked with a grimace.

Have you seen him ? You asked him with love in your eyes.

Have you ?!

He’s old, and he’s grumpy, and I love him already, you said.

Old and grumpy… I think that woman has a type, Kim said, causing everyone to laugh.

Marshall looked at you while you made eyes at him while whispering “please, please, please”. After a few seconds he sighed and agreed.

Alright, he sighed. I guess we’re getting a cat. But please give him a cool name. I can’t have a cat with a stupid name like “Fluffy”.

It should be rap-related, Alaina suggested.

I like that, Marshall said.

How about Mew Tang Clan ? You asked. Or Wiz Catlifa ? He looks like a Wiz !

Ok, Marshall chuckled. Anything you want. Let’s go for Wiz Catlifa.

You jumped at his neck and kissed his cheek, feeling like a kid on Christmas Day. He wrapped an arm around your waist and kissed your temple. You’d had a shitty week but you were incredibly happy, with the man you loved by your side, who agreed to go to the shelter with you the following week.

Eventually, after a while, everyone left. Kim was the last one to say her goodbyes. As she went through the door, she turned to Marshall and looked at him with a smile.

Oh, and, Marsh ? You’re off the hook. Happy Thanksgiving.

You had no idea what that meant, and you figured out it was one of their inside jokes or something like this. You were just happy that everything had gone smoothly. Plus, you actually like Kim and were happy to get along with her. Marshall, however, seemed a little puzzled. He nodded silently.

You were all relaxed as you went to bed. The nerves had drained you out from your energy.

Are you alright, babe ? Marshall asked as you rested your head on your pillow.

Tired, but I had a good time. I can’t believe we’re getting a cat ! You said giddily.

Only you could make me agree, he chuckled. When our last cat died, I swore we wouldn’t get another one. But if it makes you happy…

It does, you said with a smile. I love him already. Have you seen him ?

I have. You picked me so I knew you had bad taste but this… This is ultimate proof, babygirl, he chuckled.

Shut up, you said with a pout. I won’t have you speak ill of our cat.

“Our cat”, he said pensively. I like the sound of that. It’s like starting a little family with you.

You giggled and nuzzled his neck, placing a small kiss there and prompting him to pull you closer to him.

You’re all romantic, you said.

You’re worth it, he said. I love you. And the whole family fell in love with you, it seems.

Did they ?

They did, he nodded. Even Kim. I don’t know how you did that, honestly.

Maybe she’s just pretending, you said.

I don’t think she is, he said intently. Whatever. I’m just happy they like you.

You nodded and nuzzled his neck.

Happy Thanksgiving, my love.

#eminem #marshall mathers #slim shady #eminem fanfiction #recovery fanfiction #eminem x reader #eminem fluff #eminem imagine #marshall mathers x reader #marshall mathers imagine

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girljeremystrong · 2 years

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*books with great love stories and plots that don’t just revolve around them.

SORROW AND BLISS by Meg Mason

Martha’s marriage is falling apart, because there’s something wrong with her but nobody has been able to tell her what. We go back in time to relive all the ups and downs of Martha and Patrick’s relationship to find out if they can make it out together. Beautiful story about mental health and love and family.

TOMORROW AND TOMORROW AND TOMORROW by Gabrielle Zevin

Sadie and Sam love each other but are never lovers and we follow their journey for 30 years, from Boston to California as they develop together a video game and a complicated personal relationship. Very fun book about gaming and being best friends who are often in love with each other and often very mad at each other.

UNLIKELY ANIMALS by Annie Hartnett

Emma flies home from California to New Hampshire as a Med school dropout when her dad is diagnosed with a brain disease. At home her parents are in a fight, her brother is just out of rehab and her childhood best friend is missing. She scrambles to find her feet and pull everyone together. This is such a CUTE, heart lifting book with great characters and GHOSTS.

NEVER LET ME GO by Kazuo Ishiguro

Kathy, Tommy and Ruth are three best friend who have grown up in an English boarding school. But throughout their childhood many things felt wrong and as they grow and leave school they realize just how many secrets were kept from them. It’s a love story! It’s a mystery! It’s a critique of human arrogance!

NO LAND TO LIGHT ON by Yara Zghaeib

Hadi and Sama are a Syrian couple living in the USA. As they are waiting for the birth of their son, Hadi leaves to visit his family and then their lives are uprooted by a travel ban. Sama and Hadi are forced apart and as the physical and emotional distance between them grows, they try to find their way back to each other. This is a pretty sad one, I can’t lie, but such a beautiful story.

YOUNG MUNGO by Douglas Stuart

Mungo meets James in their housing estate in Glasgow. They are young and lonely, they become friends and they fall in love. Unfortunately Mungo is a Protestant and James is a Catholic, and where they’re from these things matter, especially to Mungo’s brother, a violent gang leader. This is not a very happy book either but it is THE best story about being young and falling in love. PLEASE READ THIS. Then come talk to me about it.

REAL LIFE by Brandon Taylor

Wallace is working toward a degree in the Midwest. But he’s Black and he’s queer and he feels distance between himself and his colleagues. We follow him through a summer weekend he spends with his college friends, finding out truths about them and about himself. I will never tire of recommending this book. It’s just so interesting and well written. And lovely words about the start of a relationship.

THE NIGHT CIRCUS by Erin Morgenstern

There is a circus that arrives without warning and is only open at night. Behind the scenes two magicians, Celia and Marco, are involved in a duel they’ve been training for since childhood. But despite all that, they fall in love. This is a fantasy novel that will for sure appeal to any fans of the genre. It’s fun and the aesthetics are sublime.

OPEN WATER by Caleb Azumah Nelson

Two young people meet at a pub in South East London. Both are Black British, both won scholarships to private schools where they struggled to belong, both are now artists - he a photographer, she a dancer - trying to make their mark in a city that by turns celebrates and rejects them. Tentatively, tenderly, they fall in love. So beautiful, so well written. Reads like falling in love feels like. LOVE IT.

SWIMMING IN THE DARK by Tomasz Jedrowski

Set in early 1980s Poland against the violent decline of communism, a tender and passionate story of first love between two young men who eventually find themselves on opposite sides of the political divide. It’s beautiful and poetic and quite sad. Stunning characters, stunning descriptions.

LAST NIGHT AT THE TELEGRAPH CLUB by Malinda Lo

Seventeen-year-old Lily Hu can’t remember exactly when the question took root, but the answer was in full bloom the moment she and Kathleen Miller walked under the flashing neon sign of a lesbian bar called the Telegraph Club. This is so SWEET. Lily is such a great character and her story fills your heart with pain and glee and pride. I love this book and this wonderful story.

EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM WILL SOMEDAY BE DEAD by Emily R. Austin

Gilda, a twenty-something lesbian, cannot stop ruminating about death. Desperate for relief from her panicky mind and alienated from her repressive family, she responds to a flyer for free therapy at a local Catholic church, and finds herself abruptly hired as a receptionist. Through all of this she finds a girlfriend. And it’s sweet and slow and lovely.

THE PROPHETS by Robert Jones Jr.

A novel about the forbidden union between two enslaved young men on a Deep South plantation. Isaiah was Samuel’s and Samuel was Isaiah’s. That was the way it was since the beginning, and the way it was to be until the end. Goes without saying, this is a sad story that will make you cry and will make you angry. But it is so so beautiful.

YOLK by Mary H.K.Choi

Jayne and June are two sisters living in New York after growing up in Texas. Jayne is struggling through fashion school, while her sister has a hot shot job in finance and a big apartment. They are sort-of estranged until June is diagnosed with cancer. The first love story in this book is between the sisters, but there is a budding romance for Jayne that is so sweet. This is a sweet book. I love it.

EARLY MORNING RISER by Katherine Heiny

Jane falls in love with Duncan easily. He is charming, good-natured, and handsome but unfortunately, he has also slept with nearly every woman in Boyne City, Michigan. A wise, bighearted, boundlessly joyful novel of love, disaster, and unconventional family. This feels like Gilmore Girls but better.

A TIP FOR THE HANGMAN by Allison Epstein

Christopher Marlowe, a brilliant aspiring playwright, is pulled into the duplicitous world of international espionage on behalf of Queen Elizabeth I. I also will never tire of recommending this novel about stupid Kit Marlowe becoming a spy while crushing hard on his best friend. It’s just so fun and so good.

THE BAD MUSLIM DISCOUNT by Syed M. Masood

It is 1995, and Anvar Faris is a restless, rebellious Pakistani boy whose family moves to start life over in California. At the same time, Safwa, a young girl suffocating in war-torn Baghdad with her grief-stricken, conservative father will find a very different and far more dangerous path to America. The fates of two remarkably different people intertwine and set off a series of events. It’s very good, the characters are great and the relationship is very realistic.

THE STORIED LIFE OF A.J. FIKRY by Gabrielle Zevin

A. J. Fikry is cynical but lovable. His wife has died and his bookstore is experiencing the worst sales in its history. Slowly but surely, he is isolating himself from all the people of Alice Island. But there’s Amelia, the lovely and idealistic (if eccentric) Knightley Press sales rep who keeps on taking the ferry over to Alice Island. Such a lovely book. Lovely and heatwarming with amazing characters and unpredictable plot.

WRITERS & LOVERS by Lily King

Blindsided by her mother's sudden death, and wrecked by a recent love affair, Casey Peabody has arrived in Massachusetts in the summer of 1997 without a plan. She waits tables in Harvard Square and rents a tiny, moldy room at the side of a garage where she works on the novel she's been writing for six years. When she falls for two very different men at the same time, her world fractures even more. Again this is just a lovely book. About love and grief and being lost.

AN AMERICAN MARRIAGE by Tayari Jones

Newlyweds Celestial and Roy are the embodiment of both the American Dream and the New South. He is a young executive, and she is an artist. But as they settle into the routine of their life together, they are ripped apart by circumstances. Roy is arrested and sentenced to twelve years for a crime Celestial knows he didn’t commit. BEAUTIFUL. Just masterful work. Will make you cry like a baby.

THE SONG OF ACHILLES by Madeline Miller

Achilles, "the best of all the Greeks," son of the cruel sea goddess Thetis and the legendary king Peleus, is strong and beautiful. Patroclus is an awkward young prince, exiled from his homeland. Brought together by chance, they forge an inseparable bond, despite risking the gods' wrath. I mean I like this. It’s poetic and romantic and it’s a classic story. Had to make the list...

TOM LAKE by Ann Patchett

Set during the pandemic when the main character and her three daughters are quarantining in their farm. The daughters get their mum to tell them the story of how she fell for and dated a famous actor while putting on a play in her 20s. VERY SWEET AND SPECIAL and also ann patchett can do no wrong!!!!

SIRENS & MUSES by Antonia Angress

The story of two very different girls who meet in art school. Lots going on in this book but it's all very poetic and interesting and the two main characters go through a lot but also like each other a lot.

IN MEMORIAM by Alice Winn

About two boys who meet in boarding school and then join war world I. It is insanely sad and it's a book about the war and about young people meeting terrible fates, but very romantic and they keep sending letters that are heartbreaking and they really love each other.

THE LATE AMERICANS by Brandon Taylor

About a group of friends and acquaintances who are all young and fucked up and all in different weird relationships but it's very interesting and Brandon Taylor also can do no wrong!!!!

TIN MAN by Sarah Winman

About two boys who meet in their youth and fall in love but then suddenly there's a time jump and it's been years and one of them is married to somebody else and the other one is nowhere to be found. Sad but also very special and definitely a book that is all about love.

LESS by Andrew Sean Greer

Pulitzer prize winning book about a novelist who receives an invitation to his ex boyfriend's wedding and is heartbroken so, suddenly, he finds himself coping by going on a world tour. It's funny and sweet and has a happy ending.

#OPEN WATER should have been n.1 in this list cause it doesn't get much more romantic than that #books #book recommendations #book recs #what if i tag #dark academia #just for the notes #bookblr #booksblr #young mungo #tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow #the song of achilles #last night at the telegraph club #swimming in the dark

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laurenairay · 2 months

Text

comes back to me, burning red - F. Andersen

Summary: Kendra Lee and Freddie Andersen lost touch after he was traded from Anaheim – will a surprise encounter bring back their friendship? And maybe more?

I’m jumping in as a pinch hitter for @misshoneyimhome for @callsign-denmark’s Luck of the Puck fic exchange! I haven’t written about Freddie in a little while so it was fun getting back to him – and thanks for answering all my questions! Such a lovely twist of fate after receiving my own fic from her today.

Flashback sections are in italics.

Words: 7.9k

Warnings: discussion of Freddie’s injuries, light angst, friends to lovers, cheesy flirting

Title from: Red by Taylor Swift

“Good morning Kendra Lee!”

Kendra grimaced, shutting the door to her yoga studio behind her, her long blonde hair swinging as she turned.

“Full name, first thing in the morning? What did I do?”

Her colleague and friend, Mimi, just snickered, shaking her head.

“Nothing bad, I promise,” Mimi said, smiling.

“Still ominous,” Kendra mused, swiping her staff card to log her as present in the building, “What’s going on?”

“Okay so you know how you moving over to Raleigh with me a month ago was to give you opportunities to do more yoga rehabilitation work?”

“Yes…?”

It was true, as vague as her friend was being. Having worked across yoga studios California for nearly 11 years, Kendra had jumped at the chance of diving more into rehabilitation work within yoga. Being made co-owner with Mimi and her sister Celeste was just the cherry on top.

“I was staying late last night to finish up the stock check and I got a call – specifically for you to do yoga rehab for an athlete needing conditioning to make his way back to playing. I know it’s right up your street, kind of exactly what you want to do more of, so I said yes.”

“You said yes already?” Kendra asked, surprised.

“I know, I know, but this is a huge opportunity. I said yes, with the caveat that I would double check timings with you this morning and let them know your availability for today,” Mimi explained.

“For today?” Kendra gasped.

“Yes, I know, but the guy organising it all for the athlete was insistent – the athlete chose you, off a list of yoga instructors based on feedback from other clients you had, and that’s huge,” Mimi said, wincing in apology.

Kendra took the time to think over her friend’s words, throwing her long blonde waves up in a twisted bun, her typical work hairstyle.

“You’re right. That is huge. Surprising, but huge. I guess, uh, just see what I’ve got this afternoon? I know I’ve got a couple of classes this morning already,” Kendra eventually said, “including…damn it, one that start in 15 minutes.”

Pregnancy Yoga, affectionately known as Moms who Move. Not women to mess around.

“Alright, you go get set up and I’ll call them back. Thanks, Kendra. And sorry for it being so last minute,” Mimi smiled.

“Hey, it happens. Let’s stay positive with it!” Kendra grinned.

As sudden as the work was, it really was where her heart lay, so this could only be a good thing right? Everything she’d been working towards?

“That’s the spirit I love! Get it girl!”

Kendra just laughed her way into Studio Two, her usual room, ready to make sure her class was set up in time.

By the time the afternoon rolled around, Kendra was pleasantly tired. All three classes had run smoothly so far today and there had been no major hiccups (or incidents) with any of her students. Even the Grooving Grandmas class (the adorable name her group of 12 senior ladies gave themselves) had behaved today, which only left her in a great mood.

So great, she lost track of time, until Mimi poked her head into the room.

“Hey, Kendra, your 2pm is here.”

“Oh damn, the athlete?”

“Yeah that’s the one. I’m just finishing up his intake forms if you want to join us,” Mimi said with a smile.

Kendra smiled back, nodding as she followed her friend out to the front desk. If she was being honest with herself, she would’ve liked a bit more preparation time, or even a name to start with. Hell, even the sport the athlete played in would’ve been useful, so she could start thinking of a program for them. Hopefully the athlete would understand the last minute nature of the set up. Hopefully.

But standing there in the lobby was the last person she expected to see. Just as tall and gorgeous and imposing as she’d last seen him in Anaheim, before he left over 7 years ago. He was her athlete?

“Freddie?”

“It’s been a long time, Kendra,” he murmured, smiling.

“You two know each other?” Mimi said, confused.

“How are your teaching hours coming along? You can’t have many left now before the next level, right?”

Kendra smiled up at her boss brightly. After her initial 200 hours training, she knew that teaching yoga was going to be her life’s work, even though she was only 21. Having worked insanely hard over the past two years, she was nearly ready to lead classes all by herself rather than as an assistant, and wasn’t that a heady thought? “No, not many left at all. As of yesterday I actually have 990 hours logged.”

“So you’re nearly ERYT 200?” her boss, James, grinned.

The third level of yoga instructor, after two years and 1000 hours of teaching.

“Just 10 hours left!” Kendra said brightly.

“That’s kind of perfect, if I’m being honest. We’ve been contacted by the Anaheim Ducks to run a conditioning class for a portion of the team. There are 20 players who’ve signed up, and the idea is that those who find it useful will sign up for more classes.”

“20 ice hockey players. My God. Will they take it seriously?”

She’d seen plenty of jocks in her 21 years and she knew exactly how much they goofed around when they didn’t care about things.

“Oh yeah, this is mandatory for these players and I’ll be evaluating them to send it back to their trainers. It’s serious – and it’s a big opportunity for the studio too.”

“Yeah definitely. And it’ll be good to see a different type of client for a change,” Kendra nodded.

“We love our yoga moms, don’t front,” James mused.

Kendra just grinned. She did love her beginner’s yoga mom class, he was right.

“It’ll be a big opportunity for you too, to work with them. If enough sign up, I’d like you to take on at least one for solo instruction the moment you have those 1000 hours done, to give you that experience. But if any of them give you any trouble, you let me know, okay? I won’t stand for it, regardless of who they are.”

“Thanks boss.”

“Any time.”

By the time 11am rolled around, Kendra was nervous. Not a bad nervous though, more like butterflies. She was so closed to her next stage of yoga teaching that she could almost taste it. She just hoped that this giant group of giant men would be a positive experience. They arrived in a herd, filling up the room quickly, and Kendra waited at the front of the room off to the side while her boss waited for them all to be ready.

“Alright, thanks for joining us today. I’m James Fields, owner and lead yoga instructor here, and this is Kendra Lee, who will be running this class alongside me,” he started.

She just grinned at the curious looks sent her way. Let them underestimate her, that was fine.

“As you all know, this class is mandatory and I will be evaluating you for your conditioning staff, so pay attention and we’ll all have a great time.”

Kendra watched a few disgruntled expressions popping up and fought not to laugh. Hockey players. She should’ve known they wouldn’t be any different. As her boss continued to talk, Kendra’s eyes drifted across the room, eventually landing on the man in front of her. Well, man was pushing it – this guy couldn’t be more than a couple of years older than her. A broad-shouldered redhead, pretty face, serious expression taking in her boss’s words. This one was paying attention. This one wanted to learn. Good. Even from here she could tell he would tower over her, although at 5ft2 that wasn’t really a difficult barrier. Maybe 6ft4? Maybe? Either way, this guy was going to be a good student, she could already tell.

As if he could sense his eyes on her, the man glanced over, catching her gaze. She froze, a little embarrassed to be caught staring, but he just smiled. Oh what a lovely smile that was. It was all she could do to smile back.

“If you’re all ready then, Kendra will lead you through Sun Salutation to warm up.”

She broke out of her thoughts, waving cheerfully at them all and earning a laugh. “I’ll be gentle, I promise,” she grinned.

“Yeah Freddie used to come to classes at my first studio, back in Anaheim about 10ish years ago. It’s been a while,” Kendra nodded, forcing a smile on her face.

Mimi raised an eyebrow but smiled politely at Freddie. “If you head on into Studio Two, Kendra will be right with you. I just need her to sign a form.”

He nodded, following the instructions with a smile sent Kendra’s way, leaving her alone with her colleague.

“Okay what the hell was that?” Mimi asked, wiggling her fingers in the direction Freddie went.

Kendra sighed, hands on hips.

“That was an old friend who I haven’t seen or spoken to in over 7 years. Him coming here out of the blue just threw me off, that’s all.”

“Is he going to be a problem? Because I have no issue with kicking him out if he doesn’t deserve a moment in your company,” Mimi said firmly.

It was times like this that Kendra really loved her friends.

“No, no it’ll be okay. There was no drama, we just drifted out of contact. Sure it sucked, but it was a long time ago? It’ll be fine. Besides, like you said, this is a big opportunity for me to do more with yoga rehab, right?”

Mimi pursed her lips but nodded. “Alright, if you’re sure. But let me know the second that you change your mind, if you need to.”

Kendra just gave her a quick hug, nudging her friend’s hip with her yoga mat, before heading resolutely towards Studio Two.

“So you enjoyed the last group class then?”

“I did. Anything to keep my flexibility up as good as it can get, right?”

Kendra just smiled, nodding. “Not that you seemed to have a problem with your flexibility.”

“Well I certainly haven’t had any complaints.”

He froze the moment the words left his lips, looking mortified. It was all she could do to burst into laughter at the horror on his face.

“I am so sorry. That was so unprofessional,” he groaned.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard since I’ve started here,” she said, still giggling, “You have nothing to worry about Mr Andersen.”

“Please, call me Freddie?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as his cheeks flamed red.

“Sure thing. Now let’s talk solo session scheduling – what works best for you?”

Kendra took a shaky breath as the memories of her first solo yoga session with Freddie washed over her, before steeling herself, pushing open the studio door. Freddie was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the floor on the mat he’d brought with him, and immediately smiled up at her, loosening a bit of tension in her chest. She could do this. She could totally do this.

“Hey, Freddie,” she said, unrolling her own mat.

“Hey Kendra. It’s good to see you,” he replied as she sat down opposite him.

“Good to see you too. I won’t say it isn’t a surprise because that would be a lie, but it is good to see you after all these years.”

Freddie winced a little, making her grimace inside. Was that too much?

“About that…”

He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck, so Kendra quickly shook her head. Their past wasn’t what this was all about, and it would do neither of them any good to hash it up now.

“You’re here now,” she said firmly, “So, yoga rehab. Do you know much about what it entails or if there’s anything your team specifically wants?”

“Uh, I only know the basics really. Obviously I’ve done it a lot before for conditioning, which is what my trainer said this mostly will be as my injury was a blood clotting issue rather than muscles or joints?”

Blood clots. Damn. And for someone only in their 30s?

“That must’ve been really scary,” she murmured.

His eyes widened a little in surprise, but he nodded, smiling sadly. “I genuinely thought my career was over. I’ve been out for stretches of time before, but never for anything like this. I felt…helpless,” he admitted.

She could only guess he was being so vulnerable because of their history but she still appreciated his honesty. It can’t have been easy to admit such a thing.

“I can imagine you would, yeah. But the team are figuring it out, right? They wouldn’t be signing you up for yoga rehab if they didn’t have a plan in place?” Kendra said, trying to be positive.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right. They’ve tried a few things and they seem to be happy with the results anyway – they’re looking at about a month if all goes well,” Freddie nodded.

“That’s fantastic. I’m glad I’ll be able to help you get back to where you need to be. I’ll do a bunch of research after today, to make sure I’m not pushing you too hard, to make sure I’m doing the best I can for you,” Kendra said, smiling.

One month. One month with a rehabilitation she’d never come across before. This was the exact kind of challenge she wanted – and it would be with Freddie?

“I know you will, Kendra. I trust you completely. I just…”

He trailed off, chewing his bottom lip, his hesitation making her chest ache.

“What is it?” she prompted, trying to be gentle.

“I don’t want this to be it. I’m not ready for my career to be over. I still want, no, need to prove myself,” he said softly.

“Your talent and reputation precede you, Freddie. Everything that you’ve achieved with the Leafs and now with the Canes? How beloved you are by teammates and fans? You prove yourself, every day.”

“You’ve followed my career?” he asked, clearly surprised.

To be fair, she didn’t think she would’ve been able to keep following him after he left Anaheim, but it was Freddie.

“How could I not? We were friends,” she shrugged, trying to keep her voice light.

A wave of sadness washed over Freddie’s expression, making her heart clench in her chest, but before he could speak, Kendra cleared her throat.

“You’ve got this, Freddie Andersen. We’re going to get you back to where you need to be, and you’re going to kick metaphorical ass. Maybe even literal ass if you need to,” she said firmly.

Freddie managed a small smile, nodding.

“Let’s do this then.”

“Hey, Kendra. Thanks for today. I really enjoyed the session.”

She looked up at Freddie as she took her hair out of the twisted bun she put it in for working, letting her hair cascade down her back in blonde waves.

“You don’t have to thank me every time, you know,” she mused.

After that fateful first group class, Freddie has eagerly signed on for more conditioning classes at her studio, and her boss had happily signed him on as her first solo yoga client the moment she reached her 1000 hours milestone. It had been intimidating, if she was being honest, but she was thriving under her own steam, leading all on her own. It didn’t hurt that Freddie was a willing student, keen to increase his flexibility and core strength. And it didn’t hurt that he was absolutely gorgeous either – but that was just for her own thoughts.

“I want to thank you though. The team, management in particular, are really noticing the work I’ve put in as full-time backup, and that’s all down to you,” Freddie said with a shrug and a smile.

“Well in that case, gold star for me,” she grinned.

Freddie barked out a surprised laugh, making her giggle as she rolled up her mat.

“Did you, uh…do you have any more classes now?” he asked, awkward enough for her to pay attention.

“No, you were my last of the day. Why?”

“There’s a new smoothie bar that’s opened up down the road and I was going to go after this – if you want, come with me? I’d love to learn more about how you got into yoga instruction so young,” he said hopefully.

Kendra eyed him for a moment, trying to read any implications or anything untoward in his words. The last thing she wanted was to give off the wrong impression, especially in her first adult job, but Freddie just looked so genuine that she couldn’t help but to smile. A friend couldn’t hurt, right?

“I could go for a smoothie,” she said after a moment or two, nodding.

“Great! Um, I’ll shower, change, and meet you in the lobby?”

“Sounds like a plan,” she mused, “See you soon.”

Within no time at all, Kendra had changed into a cute little cropped lilac sweater and black jeans, leaving her hair down her back to dry in waves. She hadn’t packed any makeup with her, annoyingly, but Freddie saw her all the time without makeup so she guessed it didn’t really matter. Even if she would’ve preferred a dashing of mascara and a swipe of lipgloss. Maybe she’d have to leave a spare of each in her work bag, just in case any future hangouts after work happened.

If today’s smoothie run wasn’t awkward, of course. Damn she hoped it wouldn’t be awkward.

“Ready to go?”

“Let’s do this!” Kendra said cheerfully.

Freddie just smiled down at her, easily towering over her 5ft2 frame with his 6ft4 one – yes she’d looked up his height to be certain, she was curious – opening up the door for her to walk through first.

“Such a gentleman,” she teased.

“I aim to please,” he drawled.

Kendra snorted, immediately covering her face in embarrassment, but Freddie grinned like a cat who got the cream.

“Cute snort,” he smirked.

“Ass,” she shot back, sticking out her tongue to let him know she wasn’t actually mad.

Freddie just laughed, a clear beautiful sound that sent butterflies in her stomach going overdrive. No, this was not the time. Be a professional. Don’t be a giggly idiot. Damn it.

The walk to the smoothie bar couldn’t have taken more than 5 minutes, the two of them staying in a comfortable silence – something that Kendra found difficult with people she’d known for years, so for her to feel such at ease with someone she barely knew? It was strange. Nice, but strange.

“Okay, what’ll it be?” he asked, looking up at the board, “My treat.”

“Are you sure?” she frowned.

Sure, this was her first job and she’d only been in it a couple of months, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t pay her way.

“Absolutely sure. I insist,” Freddie said firmly.

The intensity in his eyes, warm but solid, made her inhale sharply and nod. If he insisted…

“I’ll have almond milk, pineapple, kale, and mango, with a dash of honey. Thanks, Freddie,” she said, smiling up at him.

He just smiled back down at her, sending those butterflies into overdrive again, stepping forward to repeat her order as well as giving his own. When their smoothies arrived, Freddie walked over to a table in the corner so she followed, sitting down with a happy sigh.

“Oh man that’s good. Thanks for inviting me out,” Kendra said, after taking a sip of her smoothie.

“You’re welcome. It’s nice to actually meet someone near my age that as interested in yoga as I am,” Freddie said simply.

“Yeah? Not too many friends or girlfriends wanting to join you?” she asked, somehow managing to stop herself cringing to hard at the wording of her question.

Freddie just smirked slightly but didn’t call her out, thankfully. “No friends who want to do yoga with me, no. Most the team only do yoga when they absolutely have to. And no girlfriend either.”

“That’s a shame,” she said lightly, ignoring the zing through her body, “Yoga is fun and a great stress-reliever.”

“Is that why you got into it then?”

Kendra relaxed back into her seat, taking another sip of her drink, before starting to talk. Over the next hour, the two of them exchanged life stories, getting to know each other properly. Freddie talked about his career so far in the Danish league, how different and difficult it was to move over to Anaheim in August, how he’s just trying to make his mark now he’s been with down with the AHL team most the season and only up for a week. In turn, Kendra talked about how she’d always lived in California, having moved from her hometown in Santa Monica to Anaheim after meeting her now-boss at a training course, how she’d seen her mom doing yoga with her friends and fallen in love with the flow and peacefulness of it as well as the strength it gave. Talking to Freddie felt like they’d been friends for all her life, something she’d never experienced before, and she could only hope this wasn’t the last time they got to do this. Freddie was special, that was clear as day, and she felt lucky to see this relaxed side of him that she doubted many were privy to.

Eventually though, once their smoothies were finished, they had to leave before they overstayed their welcome, and Freddie walked her back to her car.

“I’m perfectly capable of walking across the parking lot on my own, you know,” she mused, jerking her chin in the direction of his car, all the way on the other side.

“And if some weirdo stalks you to your car when I can prevent that, I’d rather avoid you being alone,” he shrugged.

“Aww are you my knight in shining armour, Mr Andersen?” she teased.

Interestingly, his cheeks dusted with a blush.

“I’ll sweep you off your feet any time you need, Miss Lee,” he smirked.

Kendra just burst out laughing, shaking her head at his banter flirting. Ridiculous guy. This was going to be a fun friendship, she could already tell.

“Give me your number? We can sort out another smoothie run,” Freddie said, smiling.

She ignored those traitorous butterflies and nodded, unlocking her phone and handing it over. It could only be a good thing to have more friends in Anaheim, right?

“You think you can handle seeing me outside of the yoga studio?” she mused.

“Oh I know I can.”

Kendra and Freddie settled on three yoga sessions a week for his rehabilitation, 12 in total, to give him the conditioning build up he needed while still taking care to manage his recovery. She’d spent all night after that first meeting researching and planning the best course of movements and flows for him, making it challenging but helpful, eventually dragging herself back to bed at 4am, satisfied that what she’d planned would help him.

With any client, she would want to make sure she was satisfied, but with Freddie? She needed it to. Even after everything, she didn’t want to let him down.

Their first two sessions went well, the first mostly easing Freddie back into the swing of things, assessing where his strengths and weaknesses were, and the second session left Freddie groaning but smiling, happy he was able to push himself. Their third session, which Kendra was preparing for, would be another mild push, nothing extreme but still to see where she would need to adjust any plans.

It was all a process, but one she was enjoying immensely. Not just because of her student.

“Knock knock.”

Kendra jolted out of her thoughts, hand on her heart as Freddie walked into the studio with a grin.

“You are the worst,” she groaned.

“So you don’t want the smoothie I picked up on the way?” he mused.

He brought her a smoothie?

Her lips parted in surprise, but she stuck her hand out anyway, Freddie just laughing as he passed it over. The moment she took a sip, a wave of nostalgia ran over her. All she could think about were the smoothie runs and coffees hangouts and even the occasional lunch they used to go to together. Two and a half years of memories all flooding through her system, and it was all she could do to keep her face calm and neutral as the memories of conversations and vulnerability and laughter swirled through her thoughts. This wasn’t fair. This really wasn’t fair. She wanted to be mad at him for daring to dive back into their past like him leaving meant nothing, but how could she? How could she be mad when those memories still brought her joy?

“Almond milk, pineapple, kale, and mango, with a dash of honey. My favourite. Maybe you’re not the worst. You really remembered this?”

“Of course I did. I loved our smoothie dates,” Freddie nodded, smiling.

Dates?

“Dates?” she said, raising an eyebrow.

“Figure of speech? I don’t speak English?” he offered.

“Yeah nice try, I’m pretty sure your English is better than most people I know,” Kendra mused.

Freddie blushed but laughed.

“How could I forget anything about the girl who got me doing the best Bridge pose of my life, hm?”

She tried valiantly not to think about how good Freddie looked bent over in a backwards arch. Valiantly.

“Alright, but don’t think this means I’ll go easy on you, Freddie,” she said brightly, “We’ve still got a lot of work to do.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he grinned, “Give it to me rough.”

Kendra took a moment, trying to hold in her laughter, before she gave in and cackled.

“Oh man that was so bad, even for you,” she grinned.

“Not my finest, I’ll give you that,” Freddie shrugged, a light blush on his cheeks, “Still made you laugh though.”

Well he wasn’t wrong there.

Kendra sipped on her drink while Freddie laid out his mat, leaving the cup in a safe spot as she moved to stand in front of him.

“As always, let’s start with Sun Salutation,” she grinned.

The next hour flew by. As she promised him, Kendra did push him hard – some of the poses he wasn’t quite ready for, she could see that, at least even for the length of time they were trialling today. His natural flexibility hadn’t left him, that much was obvious, but there was still work to do. At least she could take pride in being part of rehabilitation that would never push him further than he was ready for. His safety, physical and mental, was the most important thing.

But he could do this. She knew that he could do this, and that excited her.

“Alright, that’s us done for today. Thanks, Freddie,” Kendra said softly.

Freddie opened his eyes, practically floating from savasana, face flushed from exertion.

“Thank you, Kendra. I feel awesome. Tired but awesome,” he grinned.

“Not aching too much anywhere?” she asked, standing up gracefully.

Freddie groaned as he stood up, rolling his shoulders as he checked in with himself. Kendra smiled wryly at the action – at least she could trust an athlete to know his own body.

“No, not too much,” he said.

“Are you sure?” she frowned, hands on hips.

“I promise. I know the difference between aching from a good workout to aching from injury and pain. This is good,” Freddie insisted.

Well alrighty then.

“That’s what I like to hear,” Kendra said happily, rolling her neck from side to side to loosen tension, “Take a shower, Andersen, I can smell you from here.”

Freddie barked out a laugh, shaking his head in amusement.

“Care to join me?”

“In your dreams.”

Freddie just smirked, sending a shiver down her spine. There. That was it, the spark she’d been missing for so many years.

“See you on Wednesday?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Freddie nodded.

From: Freddie I have a return date March 7th

From: Kendra That’s amazing! I told you that you could do it! These last eight sessions have really paid off! Do you feel ready?

From: Freddie As always, I should’ve trusted that you were right lol I think so? My body does for certain

From: Kendra And your mind? If you don’t feel mentally ready, Freddie, please don’t let them push you

From: Freddie Thanks, I appreciate that I think it’s more nerves than not mentally ready? Like, I don’t want to let the team down. And I don’t want critics to call me washed up

From: Kendra You could never let the team down They can see your passion, see how hard you’re working And screw the critics. They don’t know you or your body You are the furthest thing from washed up, so don’t talk about yourself like that

From: Freddie I’ve missed your fire. Yes ma’am

From: Kendra Damn right you have. That’s more like it

From: Freddie Can I still finish off my course of session with you? And maybe carry on for a few more afterwards? Just to make sure I still have that confidence?

From: Kendra As many as you want I’m here for whatever you need

From: Freddie Whatever I need? I like the sound of that

“So today’s your last official yoga rehab session with Freddie. How are you feeling?”

“Yeah, it’s all gone really well. It’s been nice reconnecting with him, as well as seeing him grow back into his conditioning and confidence. You were right, Mimi, this was a great idea,” Kendra grinned.

Mimi and Celeste both smiled at her, but the smiles quickly turned hesitant. What? What was wrong?

“Has he said something? Have the Canes said something?” she asked, starting to worry.

Had she done something wrong and he hadn’t had the guts to tell her?

“No, no, god no. Freddie’s had nothing but high praise for you since he got here and I have no doubt he’ll be saying the same to his team,” Celeste said quickly.

“He talks about me?” Kendra asked, not knowing whether to ignore the butterflies in her stomach or not.

“He does. And he always has a smile on his face when he leaves here, same as you. We just…”

“Just what?” she prompted.

“We just want you to be careful,” Celeste said, finishing her sister’s sentence.

What the hell?

Mimi winced at Kendra's expression before clearing her throat.

“When I met you, it was obvious that part of you was missing,” Mimi said softly, Celeste nodding.

What?

“What do you mean?” Kendra frowned.

“This fun flirty side of you? These beaming smiles? It’s great, don’t get me wrong, but seeing you around Freddie makes so much sense,” Mimi explained.

Okay that was crazy.

“We really are just friends,” Kendra said, shaking her head.

Mimi and Celeste send her matching disbelieving looks.

“No, really,” Kendra said, shrugging, “We always had this flirty banter but it was never anything more than that.”

“Never anything more?” Celeste said, raising an eyebrow, “Not even once?”

“No!” Kendra laughed, “He would come to my yoga classes, we’d get coffee or smoothies occasionally, sometimes lunch, but never anything more.”

“I really don’t think you see what we see. What no doubt everyone sees when they watch the two of you,” Mimi said.

“You can’t fake that kind of chemistry, Kendra. He clearly has feelings for you,” Celeste added.

What?

He had feelings for her?

And everyone saw it?

Mimi and Celeste watched her obvious turmoil with soft pitying smiles.

“Think about it. Just think about it. That’s all we’re saying,” Mimi said, her voice warm and reassuring, “And be careful?”

“You’re our girl, okay? We just want you to be happy,” Celeste said, smiling.

“Uh yeah, sure. I’ll think about it,” Kendra murmured.

It was all she could do to walk in a straight line for their staff kitchen, desperately needing a cold bottle of water to sip on while she sorted through her thoughts.

She’d always found Freddie attractive. That was something she could admit to without hesitation. But it was something she’d buried deep, knowing she could never act on it. Bringing that acknowledgement back up to the surface was terrifying, because it wasn’t just a physical attraction – it was everything about him. If she let herself think about how attracted she was to him, let herself think about his laugh, and his kindness, and his terrible taste in coffee, and his soft smile when he talked about his family, and literally everything else about him…she felt like she would explode.

How was she supposed to behave normally around him in their last scheduled yoga session, when all of these dangerous feelings were bubbling at the surface?

No, she had to find a way. She couldn’t ruin everything, not when she’d just got him back into her life. She just couldn’t.

Somehow, she managed to keep a lid on her emotions for her entire day until Freddie’s session at the end of her evening, running through the most challenging routines that pushed him to his limit, but left him with a smile on his face. He was ready. He was really ready for his return to play in two days time.

So why did it feel like everything was ending?

Freddie had stayed mostly quiet, focusing on his movements, but there were times in between flows that she caught him staring at her as if he was thinking. Thinking hard. It was almost off-putting, if it didn’t make her feel giddy. Were her friends right? Were her feelings really reciprocated?

Whatever was going through his mind, she didn’t know, but even she could feel a trembling intensity between the two of them that she couldn’t put a finger on. It felt like…anticipation.

When their class was over, Freddie insisted on waiting for her to grab all of her things, Mimi and Celeste just smirking as he waved goodbye to them, escorting her out to her car. This time he apparently hadn’t parked that far away from her, so he was insistent on walking her properly, although it could definitely be classed as more of an extremely slow stroll rather than a walk.

Like he was drawing this out as much as she was.

“You must be freezing,” Freddie murmured, “Here take my jacket.”

Before Kendra could form a word of protest at his sudden words, Freddie was slipping his jacket off and placing it over her shoulders. The warmth immediately hit her body, thrumming through her veins, and she knew without a doubt that her burning cheeks gave her thoughts away.

“There. Better?”

It was all Kendra could do to nod, staying silent as Freddie made a grunt of approval. Why was this affecting her so much? It was a just a jacket. It was just a jacket, right? It didn’t stop her sinking into the warmth though, picking up the scent of his cologne, ignoring the way her heart started beating that little bit faster.

She had to say something. She had to say something.

“Freddie…I need to ask you a question,” she said softly.

“Go for it,” he mused.

“Did you know it was me when you agreed to do a yoga rehab course?”

“What?”

Kendra exhaled a little shakily, but shook her head. She needed to know.

“When your team suggested yoga classes as part of your rehab treatment plan, how did you pick a teacher? Did you know I would be running this for you?”

“Ah.”

A single word. How ominous.

But Kendra just stayed silent, unwilling to say anything else before he did. She needed to know. It would change everything.

“The team gave me a list of options, with short descriptions about the teacher and any feedback from other clients. And…the moment I saw your name on the list, I didn’t have to think any further or look at anyone else,” he murmured.

“What?”

Freddie let out a shaky breath, halting his walk, so Kendra stopped next to him. What did he mean by that?

“I took it as a sign from the universe that I finally had a chance to make up for letting our friendship fizzle out. You were one of the best parts about Anaheim for me, and I was so wrapped up in my head in Toronto that I was stupid enough to let our friendship go. To let you go. I wanted to see you again. I knew that you would be amazing from the yoga side of things, but to get the chance to say that I’m sorry? I couldn’t pass that up.”

As he spoke, his words clear and his expression more serious than she’d ever seen, her heart started racing like it never had before. He really meant all of that, didn’t he? He really chose her?

“You have nothing to apologise for,” she eventually said, a little more breathless than she would care to admit.

“Yes, I do,” Freddie replied, huffing out a laugh, “You deserved better than I treated you.”

He looked relieved, like her being mad at him was even a possibility (not with them, never with him), but she just shook her head. Yeah, it had hurt at the time, when she finally resigned to losing contact with him – but that was over 7 years ago. With time, that hurt had faded into an ache, which in turn faded to occasional wistfulness. She could never hold a grudge against him for a trade, and certainly not for following his dream. That just wasn’t who Kendra was.

She started walking again, Freddie wasting no time in joining her, even though their steps were practically glacial in speed.

“Maybe I deserved a little better communication but it was so long ago, Freddie. I’m not holding onto past grudges. And honestly, the fact that you chose me because you wanted to reconnect? That’s all I needed.”

“Really?” he asked, voice hopeful.

“Really really,” she grinned, “Although I’m sure you can think of something to make it up to me.”

A grin spread across Freddie’s face too, making her feel a little giddy.

“Anything you wanted, Kendra Lee.”

“That is a dangerous offer, Frederik Andersen,” she shot back.

He just shrugged, grin not leaving his face. “You know I’m good for it.”

This, these flirty exchanges, served to do nothing other than light her blood on fire. Why was it always so easy to slip back into this with him like nothing had changed? That was a good thing, right?

“Come out with me on St Patrick’s Day night,” she blurted.

He raised an eyebrow, looking unimpressed, but she just laughed.

“I’m going to a karaoke bar with Mimi and Celeste – join us,” she explained.

“That’s what you want? Out of all the things you could’ve asked for…you want me to join you for karaoke,” he said incredulously.

Kendra inhaled sharply at the implication in his words but nodded anyway, hoping she wasn’t making a huge mistake.

“I do. It’ll be fun, to see you outside of work, and to do something with you that we’ve never done before. We already have a little booth booked and it’ll be better than cramming into a regular bar for St Patrick’s Day,” she said firmly.

He laughed softly, shaking his head in disbelief, before eventually nodding.

“Alright, I’ll be there. Text me the address,” he mused.

Kendra just grinned, ignoring the butterflies in her stomach as they finally reached her car.

“Thanks for lending me your jacket, Freddie.”

“Any time.”

By the time the evening of the 17th March rolled around, Kendra was buzzing. She'd not seen Freddie since his debut back on the ice, him having given the three of them tickets to say thank you. Watching him win? It was everything, and she couldn't have been prouder of him. But with his schedule and hers, he hadn't scheduled any more classes like he'd said he'd wanted to, so Kendra had been limited to text messages, hoping that her daydreams weren't just silly fantasies.

Kendra, Mimi, and Celeste had been in O'Malley's for an hour, and Freddie still hadn’t arrived. The longer that time went on, the more disappointed she felt, not wanting to believe that after everything they’d regrown between them that he would just ghost her. No, that wasn’t Freddie. It couldn’t be Freddie.

“Breathe. Have a drink. He promised he’d be here, right?” Celeste said with a sweet smile.

“He did. But that doesn’t mean he couldn’t have changed his mind,” Kendra sighed.

“Hey, no sad faces. It’s St Patrick’s Day and we’re having a good time!” Mimi said cheerfully.

Kendra just groaned, taking a big gulp of her beer, her friends just cheering. They were right. She couldn’t dwell on this. If Freddie was going to come or whether he wasn’t, she was still out with her friends to have a good time. That was what she needed to focus on.

“Up next, Kendra singing Red!”

“Ooh girl that’s you, go!” Mimi squealed.

Kendra took a deep breath to steel herself, sliding out of their booth with a confident smile. If anyone could make her feel better, it would be Taylor Swift, she knew that much. As the intro music starting playing, she focused on letting it flow through her, tapping her foot in time with the beat.

“Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street, Faster than the wind, passionate as sin, ending so suddenly, Loving him is like trying to change your mind, Once you're already flying through the free fall, Like the colors in autumn, so bright, just before they lose it all.”

As if summoned by magic, the door to the pub opened, and Freddie walked in. Within seconds he saw her standing on the karaoke stage and stopped in his tracks, offering her a small stunned smile. He came. He didn’t ghost her. Freddie actually came as she asked him. That had to mean something, right?

“Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes, Tell myself it's time now gotta let go, But moving on from him is impossible, When I still see it all in my head, In burning red, Burning, it was red.”

She found herself pouring her emotions into the words, pouring everything she felt about Freddie into the song, not able to take her eyes off him. By now, Mimi and Celeste had noticed how she was performing just for Freddie – she could see their grins from across the room – and a few other patrons were starting to notice too. But she couldn’t stop herself. Her body felt almost out of control, singing her heart out to the only man who’d ever truly held it.

“Oh, losing him was blue, like I'd never known, Missing him was dark gray, all alone, Forgetting him was like trying to know, Somebody you never met, 'Cause loving him was red, Yeah, yeah, red, Burning red.”

His eyes were almost wild, locked onto her like she was the only person in the room. It was a heady feeling, giving her the confidence she needed to finish the song with a smile.

“And that's why he's spinning 'round in my head, Comes back to me, burning red, Yeah, yeah.”

She curtseyed dramatically to cheers and applause as the song ended, a wide grin on her face, and she moved to step off the stage, Freddie was already there with a hand extended to help her down. She took it silently, inhaling sharply as Freddie didn’t let go – instead her guided her across the room to the bar, the crowd parting with whatever intensity was on his face, so much so that they were served immediately.

“Two baby guinnesses,” Freddie asked politely.

The barman just laughed, nodding as he poured the shots, Freddie not letting go of her hand even as he paid for their drinks. He passed her one of the shots with a hopeful smile, the sweetness in his eyes intoxicating, so she clinked the glass gently with his, the cool liquid sliding down her throat smoothly.

“I wasn’t sure if you would make it,” Kendra said, offering him a small smile.

“I was thinking. Thinking about a lot of things. And I have something I need to say,” Freddie murmured, voice barely audible above the rumble of the room’s conversation.

“Oh?” she said, breath caught in her throat.

“I need to be honest with you, Kendra. I don’t think I can do any more classes with you.”

Oh. Everything in her chest felt like it was crumbling, Kendra barely able to get a breath in.

Wait, what?

“It would be incredible unprofessional of me,” Freddie added.

“Unprofessional? Freddie, if I’ve done something-”

The last thing Kendra was expecting was for Freddie to cut off her words with a kiss.

And not just any kiss. A toe-curling, melt into his arms, curl her fingers into his shirt kind of kiss. As his hands cupped her face and his lips moved with hers, it was all she could do to let out a soft little moan, interrupted only at the chorus of cheers and whistles around them. Freddie broke the kiss with a soft laugh, Kendra just feeling dazed, but his shy smile just made her giddy all over again.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long. I just didn’t think I could,” he admitted, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

They were right. Mimi and Kendra were right.

“What changed?” she managed to ask.

“We changed,” he said. “We’ve both grown so much in ourselves since I left Anaheim and I am proud of both of us for taking what we need to make ourselves happy and successful. But I don’t want to lie to myself any more, thinking that I don’t need you too.”

“You need me?” she said, surprised.

“I do, in every way. I was an idiot for so many years, Kendra. I don’t want to waste any more time,” he said seriously.

“Jesus, Freddie, knock a girl for six why don’t you,” she said, huffing out a laugh.

He froze at her words, clearly fearing the worst, but Kendra just grinned. How could she be anything but excited?

“I’m yours, Freddie Andersen. I always have been,” she said happily.

The smile that spread across his face was worth a thousand lifetimes. This was what she had been waiting for. Exactly this.

“Now, buy me another drink and sing a song with me, and I’ll consider kissing you again,” Kendra grinned.

He laughed in disbelief but grinned so widely in response that it made her giddy. “One blue moon pale ale, coming right up.”

Her favourite girls night drink? How did he remember everything she’d ever said? They were really doing this. They were finally doing this.

“You’re going to be trouble, aren’t you?” she laughed.

“Probably. You love it though.”

That she did.

#my writing #frederik andersen fic #luck of the puck exchange #frederik andersen imagine #frederik andersen x oc #frederik andersen fanfic #carolina hurricanes fic #hockey fic #hockey imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine

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justforbooks · 1 year

Photo

David Crosby, who has died aged 81, was a premier-league rock’n’roll star twice. In the mid-1960s he was a founder member of the Byrds, the Los Angeles band often credited with inventing the genre “folk-rock”. This was defined by their shimmering recording of Bob Dylan’s Mr Tambourine Man, its distinctive harmonies and chiming 12-string guitar carrying it to the top of the charts in Britain and the US in 1965.

Arrogant and argumentative, Crosby was sacked from the Byrds in 1967, but, after producing Joni Mitchell’s debut album, Song to a Seagull, he found an ideal berth with Crosby, Stills and Nash. It was a group of distinct individuals who wrote their own songs, but together they created one of the great harmony-singing blends in pop history. Their debut album, Crosby Stills & Nash (1969), was an immediate smash, and proved hugely influential on a rising generation of west coast artists. Crosby’s long hair, walrus moustache and buckskin jacket made him look like a frontiersman for the Age of Aquarius. Their second album, Déjà Vu (1970), with the addition of Neil Young, and the band becoming Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young (CSNY), felt like the crowning moment of a California golden age. It topped the US chart, reached No 5 in the UK and has sold 14m copies.

The members then embarked on solo ventures and their reunions grew increasingly rare, though they reformed for a stadium tour in 1974, a lavishly wasteful affair that Crosby nicknamed “the Doom tour”. A major obstacle was that Crosby, a regular marijuana and LSD user, would succumb to a ferocious addiction to crack cocaine, with near-fatal consequences. This came to a head on 28 March 1982, when he was arrested by the California Highway Patrol after he crashed his car into the central divider on the Interstate 405 highway. Police found freebasing paraphernalia and a .45-calibre pistol in the car, and it was later determined that Crosby had suffered a seizure from “toxic saturation”.

A couple of weeks later he was arrested again on similar charges, this time at a Dallas nightclub where he was performing. A spell in a rehab facility in New Jersey failed when Crosby fled the premises. His decline from prince of west coast rock aristocracy to struggling addict was halted only when he was jailed in Texas in 1986, following yet another drugs-and-firearms arrest.

In 1985, Spin magazine had told its readers “The Tragic Story of David Crosby’s Living Death”, but after being paroled from Huntsville prison in August 1986, Crosby staged a remarkable comeback. He marked his return with the enthralling autobiography Long Time Gone (1988) and the solo album Oh Yes I Can (1989). He would make six further solo discs, in addition to Crosby & Nash (2004), two albums with Stills and Nash (Live It Up in 1990 and After the Storm, 1994) and American Dream and Looking Forward with CSNY (1988 and 1999). In 1987 he married Jan Dance, who had survived her own addiction purgatory alongside him. Shortly after being diagnosed with hepatitis C, in 1994 he underwent a liver transplant, the operation paid for by Phil Collins (Crosby had sung on Collins’s 1989 hit Another Day in Paradise), and bounced back with renewed energy.

Born in Los Angeles, he was the second son of the cinematographer Floyd Crosby and his first wife, Aliph Van Cortlandt Whitehead, a scion of the influential Van Cortlandt dynasty. Floyd came from an upper-class New York background, his father having been the treasurer of the Union Pacific Railroad, and his mother the daughter of a renowned surgeon. He had tried his hand at banking in New York before working on documentary films in the South Pacific (including FW Murnau’s Tabu, for which he won an Oscar) and eventually moving to Hollywood, where he won a Golden Globe award for his work on Fred Zinnemann’s western High Noon and made numerous films with Roger Corman.

David’s early musical influences included classical music and jazz as well as the Everly Brothers and bluesman Josh White, and he recalled how he would take the harmony parts when the family would gather to sing extracts from The Fireside Book of Folk Songs. A trip with his mother to hear a symphony orchestra “was the most intense experience I can remember from my early life” (as he wrote in Long Time Gone), because it illustrated how musicians could collaborate “to make something bigger than any one person could ever do”.

He attended the exclusive Crane school in Montecito, California, then Cate boarding school in Carpinteria. Though intelligent, he regarded academic work with contempt and refused to apply himself. One area where he did shine was in musical stage shows, such as his performance as the First Lord of the Admiralty in Gilbert and Sullivan’s HMS Pinafore. He subsequently attended Santa Barbara City College, but quit and moved to LA to study acting. However, music was becoming his true focus, and he began playing in folk clubs with his elder brother Ethan (who would take his own life in 1997). When a girlfriend became pregnant, Crosby hastily left town and worked his way across the country towards the folk-singing mecca of Greenwich Village, New York, where the likes of Peter, Paul and Mary, Phil Ochs and Joan Baez were breaking through, while Dylan was about to transform the musical climate entirely.

Crosby formed a partnership with the Chicago-born folk singer Terry Callier and they performed frequently together, before Crosby travelled down to Florida in 1962 to sample the folk scene in Miami’s Coconut Grove district. He then worked his way back to Los Angeles via Denver, Chicago and San Francisco. In LA he met Jim (later Roger) McGuinn and Gene Clark, all of them fascinated by the Beatles and the idea of mixing folk with rock’n’roll. They became the Jet Set, which evolved into the Byrds with the addition of the bassist Chris Hillman and drummer Michael Clarke.

Signed to Columbia, the Byrds had already built an enthusiastic local following by playing in clubs such as Ciro’s on Sunset Strip by the time Mr Tambourine Man was released in April 1965, and its success was followed up by their debut album, released in June. Crosby’s distinctive tenor voice was integral to the band’s vocal blend, and he began to develop an idiosyncratic songwriting style.

Influenced by jazz as much as rock, his songs used unusual chords and unconventional melodies. On the band’s third album, Fifth Dimension (1966), one of his most significant contributions was co-writing Eight Miles High. This psychedelic milestone gave them a Top 20 US hit, and also reflected Crosby’s infatuation with the jazz saxophonist John Coltrane. Their next album, Younger Than Yesterday (1967), featured Crosby’s ethereal Everybody’s Been Burned as well as his self-indulgent sound experiment Mind Gardens, while the song Why reflected his admiration for the sitar maestro Ravi Shankar. When the Byrds met the Beatles, Crosby’s enthusiasm for Shankar helped spark George Harrison’s interest in Indian music.

Crosby’s green suede cape and Borsalino hat had made him a Hollywood Hills style icon, but his days as a Byrd were numbered. He had irked his bandmates at the Monterey pop festival in June 1967 by making rambling speeches about LSD and the assassination of John F Kennedy, and also by getting on stage with Stills’s band Buffalo Springfield in place of the absent Young. Crosby’s song Lady Friend (1967) flopped as a single, and during the making of the album The Notorious Byrd Brothers he was fired after arguments over the choice of material. His song Triad, depicting a menage-a-trois, was vetoed by his bandmates as being too risque (Jefferson Airplane subsequently recorded it). Nonetheless, Crosby played on and co-wrote several tracks, and The Notorious Byrd Brothers is arguably the Byrds’ finest album.

Borrowing $25,000 from Peter Tork of the Monkees, Crosby bought a 74ft schooner called Mayan, where he would write some of his best-known songs including Crosby, Stills and Nash’s Wooden Ships. The obvious potential of CSN immediately won them a deal with Atlantic Records, which released their debut album in May 1969. Their second-ever live appearance was at the Woodstock festival that August. Though dominated by the all-round wizardry of Stills, the album showcased the different writing skills of each member. Crosby’s Guinnevere demonstrated his fondness for unusual scales and harmonies, while the bluesy Long Time Gone was a heartfelt response to the assassination of Bobby Kennedy and indicated the group’s willingness to embrace political and social issues.

Déjà Vu, released nine months later, brought another strong showing from Crosby. The hanging chords and mysterious time changes of his title track made it one of his most mesmerising compositions, while Almost Cut My Hair was his battle cry for the counterculture. However, personality clashes within the group while on tour in 1970 prompted them to split.

All the members made solo albums, including Crosby’s If I Could Only Remember My Name (1971). Additionally, he formed a successful duo with Nash, which brought them US Top 10 hit albums with Graham Nash David Crosby (1972, also UK No 13) and Wind on the Water (1975), and they reached No 26 with Whistling Down the Wire (1976). In 1973 Crosby reunited with his previous band for the album Byrds, and in 1977 Crosby, Stills and Nash released CSN, which reached No 2 on the US album chart and outsold the trio’s debut. However, by the time they made Daylight Again (1981), another US Top 10 hit, Crosby was in the throes of addiction. Allies (1983), a patchwork of live and studio material, was the group’s last effort before he was jailed.

Crosby’s post-prison renaissance continued with regular tours with CSN, who went on the road almost annually from 1987, with Young joining them in 2000, 2002 and 2006. He released the solo album Thousand Roads (1993), which gave him a minor hit single with Hero, then picked up the pace dramatically in the new century with Croz (2014), Lighthouse (2016), Sky Trails (2017) and Here If You Listen (2018). For Free, featuring Steely Dan’s Donald Fagen and Michael McDonald, came out in 2021. His final release, in December, was David Crosby & the Lighthouse Band Live at the Capitol Theatre.

One of his regular musical collaborators was James Raymond, his child with Celia Crawford Ferguson, whom Crosby had left pregnant in California in the early 60s, and who had given her baby up for adoption. She later moved to Australia. Raymond met his birth mother in 1994, then in 1995 introduced himself to his biological father at UCLA medical centre, where Crosby was having treatment following his liver transplant. An accomplished musician and composer, Raymond played in the jazz-rock band CPR with his father and Jeff Pevar (they released four albums between 1998 and 2001), was music director for Crosby’s solo live shows and also became a member of Crosby, Stills and Nash’s touring band from 2009.

Yet Crosby’s creative rebirth coincided with a calamitous breakdown in relations with his old comrades. In 2014 Young said CSNY would never tour again after Crosby described his new partner, Daryl Hannah, as “a purely poisonous predator”, and in 2016 Nash, who had always gone the extra mile for Crosby throughout his addiction years, also announced his estrangement from him.

In 1991 Crosby was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame as a member of the Byrds, and in 1997 with Crosby, Stills and Nash. He won the 2019 Critics’ Choice movie award as the “most compelling living subject of a documentary” for AJ Eaton’s film David Crosby: Remember My Name.

Crosby continued to be plagued by health problems. He suffered from type 2 diabetes, and in 2014 was left with eight stents in his heart following major cardiac surgery.

He was the sperm donor for the children of Melissa Etheridge and her partner Julie Cypher: their son, Beckett, who died in 2020, and daughter, Bailey.

Jan and their son, Django, survive him, as do James, a daughter, Erika, by Jackie Guthrie, and a daughter, Donovan, by Debbie Donovan.

🔔 David Van Cortlandt Crosby, musician, singer and songwriter, born 14 August 1941; died 18 January 2023

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

#JUST FOR BOOKS #David Crosby #in memoriam

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mercurygray · 7 months

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Postwar TDS....Ruth and the dress shop she works in please and thank 💕

She gets home and knows she needs a job.

She did everything to get by in Atlantic City, waiting for Joe. Waiting tables, working in an automat, checking coats at a restaurant. All the other girls in the boarding house were war wives, too, waiting for husbands to get home, from the navy or the hospital or who knows where else.

They all talk about medals their husbands won, about battles. Ruth never tells them that she has battles and medals, too. Here she's just Mrs. Toye, from New York, waiting for Joe to finish his rehab. And they talk all the time about after - about houses, about babies, about the jobs their husbands are going to get when they get home. Drive a taxi, or work at the bank, or the factory, or the farm. None of them will work, it seems - they want that normal back, too.

Not Ruth. She has no idea what Joe's going to be able to do. But she knows what she can do, and if that's all they've got, then that's all they've got. She jumped out of airplanes and killed men and won Purple Hearts and she'll be damned if she has to make a man do all the work to keep them together. Why should she worry about the future - it's just borrowing trouble.

It's just by accident they all discover she can sew. Someone's sleeve nearly comes off before the in-laws are in town, and Ruth flies into action. You'd never know anything was wrong, the ladies all say. Better than it was before.

Suddenly everyone has mending to do, and Ruth lets the coat check job go so she can keep up - for a modest fee, of course. But she's still waiting tables and making sandwiches. A paycheck is a paycheck. Who can live on taking in mending?

Back in New York, there are always spots for waitresses. She takes the late shift at a diner down the street, fills in at the counter at a deli a couple of days a week. The old neighborhood doesn't quite welcome her back with open arms, but what was she expecting, marrying a Catholic? Joe keeps filing out job applications and she never says a word on her way to work. It'll work out, one day. It'll come.

One day there are two women at the deli counter, talking about how the seamstress down the street can't find good help - my dress for Georgie's bar mitzvah not done yet! But who else would I ask? Her daughter says she doesn't want the business, and the son in California! A shame.

She sees the shop on the way home - a little basement studio, the front window half-visible from the street. There's a dress in the window the color of orange sherbet, with a nice big bow on the front. I could do that, Ruth thinks. The bell over the door dings as she comes in - the only sound in the place. It feels like walking into an ambush. And Ruth knows she should be scared…but she's not. She's a long way past being scared of anything.

"I hear you're looking for help," she announces to the silver-haired woman behind the counter. "My name is Ruth Toye, and I can sew just about anything."

The woman raises an eyebrow at the name. "Toye sounds English," she says.

"And the Megillot says Ruth was a good daughter to her mother," Ruth says straight back in her best Yiddish. The seamstress doesn't seem to have an argument for that.

They agree on a time tomorrow morning. Ruth walks home feeling on top of the world, better than she's ever felt about sandwiches or slicing deli meat or bussing dishes.

It's something beautiful, she says. I want to put something beautiful into the world. She's still thinking about that dress, how it's ice cream and sunrises and fresh starts. It's late and she and Joe are lying in bed, listening to the traffic in the street outside, her leg hooked up over his side, one hand on his chest.

Like a baby, she adds, before she can stop herself. I want one of them, too.

#post war #ruth shapiro #let ruth have nice things 1946!!

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joe9cool · 1 year

Text

Collide-Justin Herbert-38

This is all fanfiction purposes I do not own or know the Chargers. Thank you! Also TW: A tiny hint of reference to suicide.

"Baby I need to get on the plane." Justin moaned as he broke the kiss for a second before Sara pulled him back to her. They were parked on the upper level parking garage away from everyone. Locked in an intense makeout session for the past ten minutes, Justin still had another twenty minutes before he had to be in the terminal. Sara thought that was more than enough time for some activities.

While Justin was enjoying himself, he also was a little nervous. While he was more understanding of the paps, he didn't want photos of them making out published everywhere for everyone to see. Sara finally pulled away, but to work on his neck and her lips found his spot. "Sara what if we get caught.. oh god" He trailed off in a moan.

She laughed against his neck. "Baby, you really don't think these windows aren't tinted? We could fuck like we did after Bella's party and no one would know."

"Umm well the car would be rocking, someone would call the cops." Sara rolled her eyes. "You fucking nerd." He laughed. "I just don't want our first time to be in a car."

"Damn you're a virgin?" She joked. He rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean." She laughed and kissed him. "I'll miss you." She pouted. "It's only for a week, then you will be back in California and I can hold you hostage in bed." Sara smiled, but Justin knew it wasn't her full smile. "What's wrong?"

"I guess that means I'm going to have to confront Erika?" He nodded. The past week Sara came to terms that Erika was no longer to be trusted, and that she would have to cut her off as a member of her team and a friend. Justin found her crying a couple of times in the night and comforted her. He couldn't imagine the level of betrayal she felt.

"I don't want you to be alone with her okay? I just don't trust her." She nodded. "Bella said the same thing. I'm surprised she hasn't flown out to LA to rip her head off." She laughed, remembering what her friend said when she told her the news.

It had been a hectic week since Mike was released from the hospital. He couldn't do the usual activities just yet, as he was confined to a wheelchair 24/7 the first few days. He could stand and walk around with therapy, but he got winded easily, as the physical therapist told him it would take months to be back to his old self.

In a video meeting with his board and colleagues. Mike announced his retirement, saying this was his second chance to enjoy the rest of his life. The board was in shambles. A few, including Barry, supported the decision. The thirty seven years Mike put into the company were some of the toughest, craziest, hectic known to man but Michael Wozniak was going to leave on a high note.

It seemed he was enjoying his time off. Trying to do as much as he could in his condition. Justin and Sara would go by the house after he had his therapy and spend time with the family. While Mike and Sara's relationship wasn't perfect, it was on the mend. As for Willa she was on bail waiting to go before a judge. The family blocked her number, and thanks to the restraining order that her team put in place she wasn't allowed to go near her.

Unfortunately, The Chargers wanted Justin back in Los Angeles. Contract negotiations and they wanted to be rehab by their trainers. He decided to go back reluctantly, and thanked the Pittsburgh trainers for everything.

Justin was disappointed in going back. He didn't get to spend too much alone time with Sara. Between running back and forth with Mike, everyone attempts to go back to their normal routine, they were constantly on the run.

"Your family is great but wow. You were right, they are tiring." He told her one night as she was getting ready for bed. Snuggling up to him, she hummed. "Yeah, and when my parents were working and all the sports my sisters were in. Constant running around, probably why I spent so much time in my room. It gave me peace and quiet." She laughed and Justin smiled.

Lost in the memories, Justin looked down at his watch. "Okay, I got to go." She nodded and kissed him. "Call me when you land. I love you."

"I love you, tell Charlie I'm sorry for missing his party." Sara would be staying in Pittsburgh for another week for her nephews birthday. He was disappointed that Justin couldn't make it. But he understood from an early age about work. One of the things Mike promised to make up for. "My dad has a lot of lost time to make up for, not just me but for his grandkids." She told Justin.

Once he was situated on the plane, he let his mind wander off. Sara grew up a lot differently than him. While his family was middle class, they were close and would never put work above each other. Her family had tons of money, and to some degree they were close, but they had all been affected by the mistakes Mike and Cathy made. That much was evident when she took him on a tour of the large childhood home she grew up in. She told him how many nights she cried on the balcony when her parents fought, when they missed shows of hers. How guilty she felt crying over this when her classmates like Erika were struggling and she had everything at her fingertips.

"I always felt like a failure. All of the parties we had here, everytime people would look at me and say, "Oh Mike, she's going to be the one living with you til she's 30 with that silly little dream of hers. Where did you go wrong with this one?"

"I can only imagine how hurtful that was hearing that." She looked at him. "If we have children, I will not allow anyone to talk about them like that." He nodded. "I agree."

He couldn't imagine having your own friend's and family as your worst critic. His family had always expressed their support, even when things didn't go their way. His only criticism came from scouting and the NFL analysts. Even then, he had support from friends and family. She told him. "I couldn't love myself out of my world shitting on me."

He fell asleep on the rest of the plane ride. He landed in Los Angeles where Mike was waiting for him. As much as he was happy to be with his girlfriend on the east coast he missed Los Angeles. He was ready to get back to football. Justin kept up with the news and knew the guys they gained and lost. Losing Drew hurt alot, especially to Kansas City but that was business. Getting off the plane, he spotted his wide receiver with a big smile on his face. After doing their bro hug they went to Mike's car making small conversation. It wasn't until they got into Mike's car that the questions came.

"So you and Sara are good?" Justin smiled and nodded. "Aye! That's my boy, finally got your head out of your ass." He slapped his hand on Justin's shoulder as they hit the Los Angeles traffic. Justin didn't miss this. He laughed before turning serious, Mike was one of his best friends on the team and wouldn't tell a soul. "We know who the leak is."

Mike didn't take his eyes off the road. "Oh yeah who?"

"Her best friend slash assistant Erika." Mike did take his eyes off the road for that news. "No way, the redhead that always has a pout on her face?" Justin nodded. "She has access to Sara's phone, and we recognized the pictures of us at a party. Erika took those, and she was tagged at the photographers dinner."

"How's Sara handling it?"

"She's hurt, and feels violated. She doesn't understand why she would do this. It isn't a money issue, she's helped her and her family with money. I just don't understand why she would betray her like that."

"Well they live together? How is that going to work."

Justin shrugged. "She is going to have a legal team draw up a NDA and some other stuff. We can't trust her, she's going to go to the press no matter what we say and try to spin the narrative."

"And how are you dealing with this? I know you are so concerned about your privacy."

"I love Sara, and we are a team. Our relationship isn't a secret, but it's going to be private. We aren't going to be posting each other constantly. Little glimpses and stuff." Justin smiled as he thought about what he and Sara talked about. "Sort of like a Taylor swift and Joe Alwyn thing."

Mike smiled. "I know nothing about that, but I'm glad you figured everything out. You guys work so well together."

There was silence for a bit until Mike spoke again. "I'm sorry, I have to ask, what is going to happen with Taylor? She's been at the stadium asking questions."

Justin rolled his eyes. He went into the whole story about Taylor lying to Sara and the pictures she used. Mike was in awe. "Wow, I knew she was insane, but to go that far."

"I don't even know what I should even say to her. I don't want her around me and especially Sara. But she works for the damn network. I'm going to have to deal with her once camp starts."

Justin pondered over his options and talked with Mike about upcoming workouts and team meetings. The fact that Kansas City won the superbowl just made the team more determined.

Mike and Justin pulled up to his place in Irvine. It was nice to be home, it would be even nicer if his girlfriend agreed to move in with him. She hadn't given him a sure answer yet.

Once Mike left, he walked around imagining all of the feminine touches Sara would bring to his place. He looked over at the cat wheel that Nova got for Christmas. He texted Pat that he was home and was free to fly out with Carly and bring Nova home. He remembered she also got a Bengal cat; he wasn't sure how Nova would react to Eugene. Maybe in some way the name of the cat was a sign that they were always meant to be.

As he walked around the almost empty house, he made a list of food and household essentials he needed. He was almost gone for a month and a half and he needed a lot of things. Also he wanted to prepare for Sara's arrival. As he went through his closet to grab his laundry basket he found the calander she made him. He grabbed and began looking through it. When they broke up he forgot to give it back, and he didn't just want to throw it out in case it landed in the wrong hands. He wasn't that much of an ass.

He found himself getting hard as he flipped through it, and as much as he wanted to give into his desires, he wanted to wait until he had the real thing.

He got out his phone and messaged her

I'm home, found your calendar.

A few seconds later he heard a ding

I'm glad you have it. I have a gyno appointment tomorrow. I'm going on the shot. It takes two weeks

He groaned. I'm about to say fuck it and risk our chances. I'm going to get you pregnant one day.

Lmfaooo. One DAY. Right now it's fuck them kids.

A photo was attached and he opened it expecting a sexy image. But instead it was a selfie with spit up on her shirt.

Wow that killed the mood 😂 let me guess Kenzie with her reflux?

Yes, lucky she's turning one tomorrow and she's cute.

He laughed. He couldn't deny seeing Sara interact with her nieces and nephew's got him in major baby fever. Justin remembered the dream he had very early on in their relationship. He had a wedding band on his finger and she had a band with a swollen belly. Fuck

Patrick texted that he and Carly would be in the next morning with Nova in tow. On that note he decided to call it an early evening and just watch some television. He could do all of his errands tomorrow.

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Sara wasn't sure whether she wanted to scream or cry.

She was facetiming Erika who didn't have the slightest idea of her best friend's knowledge of her betrayal. The red head updated her on the cat, some dates she went on.

"I'm glad Erika. So I should be in town next week." Her friend's smile dropped. "With Justin?"

"Well he's in Los Angeles already so no." She knew what Erika meant, she didn't want to say it out loud.

"But you guys are back together?"

"We're working on it." Erika rolled her eyes. "Seriously? What about Harry?"

"Ill talk to him when I get back. But I don't think he's too upset. He was making out with Emily Ratajkowski. That's not a guy serious about getting married."

"Well you can't keep him waiting forever." Sara wanted to scream. Why because you need to report back to Jack?

"Look, I'll take care of him when I get back. Just keep doing what you are doing. I'll be back next week."

"Okay. Hey, maybe we can have a spa day. AnnSophie will be back in town, and you have some break before Filming the show starts."

Sara nodded. "Yes I will see if I can fit it in." She hung up on Erika. If she stayed on the phone any longer guaranteed there would be a fight, and she wanted to confront her face to face and not alone.

She tried to push the thoughts out of her head. She had to help Alyssa prepare for Kenzie's small first birthday. This was due to Mike and being careful that he didn't get sick. Same with Charlie, Mike and Sara were only attending the family party, but not for the party with school friends. She did it last year and had to leave, as all of the parents kept coming up to her and asking for autographs and photos.

She was tasked with picking up the cake and some last minute decorations. They had to switch to some healthier options for food since their dad came home. It was funny, of all things he was upset about food was the last thing they thought would cause a problem. Granted, their dad drank and smoked Cigars, but he enjoyed a home cooked meal, and her mother always sent him leftovers which were mostly healthy options.

She ran all of the requested errands and drove back to her sister and Brother in law's Pennsylvania home. Upon arriving she saw Ryan and Michelle, as well as Brent's parents. After giving them greetings Mrs. Smith spoke. "Oh hunny, is it true you have a man in your life? Alyssa told me you are seeing a fine young man."

Sara smiled. "The rumors are true. I'm seeing someone." Mrs. Smith pulled her into a big hug. "Oh that's wonderful! Is he still here?"

"No, he had to go back to Los Angeles."

Pretty soon everyone's attention was on setting the decorations up so Alyssa didn't have to stress herself out the next day. As Sara was working on the Balloon arch Michelle came up to her. "Need help with that?"

Sara laughed. "Please. I should have just paid for someone to set this up." Michelle laughed as she started to help blowing up the pink balloons on the machine. Once she finished five she looked at Sara. "How many do we have to blow up?"

Standing on the ladder working on the arch, she looked around. "Well I did fifteen so far and with your five. It looks like we got about fifty more at least." Michelle groaned and Sara laughed. "Yeah when Justin and I have kids, remind me not to do this, no matter how cute the final product looks."

Michelle paused, thinking of what her sister in law just said. "So you think this is it?"

Sara stopped assorting the colors and looked down at Michelle. "What do you mean?"

"I mean you've never talked about having kids before. You said you wanted them before but you never brought up a name with it." Michelle smiled, and Sara matched it. "Yeah, I know this is crazy, I mean god we haven't even been together for a full year but I'm in love with him. It's just a feeling I've never felt before. The first thing I want to see when I wake up is his face, or hear his voice. When he calls me baby it's just the greatest thing. I know we had a bump but I feel sure that he feels the same way about me."

"I was talking to George and Brent. Brent really likes Justin. He's very protective of you, since he views you as a sister." Sara playfully rolled her eyes. "Well he is the pain in the ass older brother that I never had." Michelle laughed before speaking.

"We are all so happy for you Sara, you deserve it. There is nothing more beautiful than seeing someone unlucky in love finally being loved by the right person." Sara had tears come to her eyes. "Stop, I'm gonna cry." They giggled. "So I have to ask. Is this the end of all of the endings?"

Sara laughed at the Swift song reference. Sara thought about it, but not for long.

"Yes it is."

—----‐—-----------------------------------------------------------

"Taylor!"

The blonde reporter turned around and lit up when she saw the tall quarterback; however she quickly realized that he wasn't approaching her with good intentions. With his long strides he was caught up to her in no time. "We need to talk."

"You can come into my office." They went silently into a private room where she closed the door. Turning towards him, she maintained her smile. "Hi! How is your off-season going?"

He didn't meet her smile. "What did you say to Sara?" He knew, but he wanted to hear it from her mouth, and wanted to see if she'd lie.

Of course she chose the latter. "What are you talking about?"

"I know you ran into her, and I know what you said. Why on earth would you lie about that?"

She turned her back towards him and didn't say anything for several seconds. "Why her?"

He was confused, not expecting that response. "Huh?"

She turned towards him. "The entire time we were together you were so adamant about us being secretive. Hell when someone posted they saw us out you freaked out and didn't talk to me for a week. You stood me up at the airport because it looked too crowded. Now this girl you've been seeing less than a year comes along and you're all about flaunting this relationship? Why wasn't I good enough?"

Justin understood what she meant. He acknowledged that he wasn't the greatest partner, and even though he and Taylor were just hooking up, there were moments where he acted and treated her like shit. He sighed. "I'm sorry, I know that I wasn't the greatest person to you, and for that I regret. But Sara… I'm in love with her, and I should have told you about her when things started to get serious. I'm not flaunting this relationship. I'm just being normal for the first time in my life."

"But again. Why her? She's the total opposite of you. She isn't going to stop her career for you. You guys are going to be Tom and Gisele 2.0"

He shook his head. "I don't need to explain anything to you. What you did was wrong and uncalled for. I don't understand how you thought that was going to benefit you, you do realize me or Sara could have gotten you fired!"

Taylor shook her head. "So that's it? You love her." Justin nodded. Taylor rolled her eyes and opened the door. "Get out."

He walked out the door but he turned to look at her. "I hope that we can be professional."

She waved her hand "yeah, you're not worth my career." He went to leave again.

"Justin?"

"Yes?"

"When you and Sara fail. Don't come looking for me, cause I won't be here." She shut the door

He laughed

—--------------------------------------------------------‐—-----------

"What do you mean it's going to be another week before i see you?" Justin groaned. He was in bed with Nova while on the phone with Sara. Her flight was supposed to arrive the next day. He was looking forward to seeing her after a week but now she had other plans.

She told him that her manager needed her to make a couple of appearances in New York and Vegas. Selena Gomez was hosting a party for some product launch, then Bella was having an event for her drink, then she was filming an episode of hot ones.

Basically it would be another week before he saw her.

"I'm not happy about it either. I promise I'll take the first private flight home once filming has wrapped up, then I have a whole month off before the show starts filming. I'm all yours."

"We are not leaving my bedroom for days when you get here." He heard her giggle at that. "I'm serious."

"I know you are, baby. Trust me I'm going to need it."

It was silent before Justin spoke. "Is Erika going to be with you?"

"No, she's still at my house. I don't trust myself to not say something, and I don't need an issue."

"So you're going to confront her when you get home?"

She nodded, then realized that he couldn't see her over the phone. "Yes. I don't even know what to say to her. I'm getting nervous to the point of a panic attack just thinking about it."

"Hey hey hey." He witnessed her have a panic attack once, and it hurt him to see her go through that. "Listen, we will do this together. I'll be there when you do."

"I needed that."

—-------------------------------------------------------------------

"Sara! I'm so glad you came!" Selena hugged her and greeted Alex. They had just arrived at the hotel only hours after getting off the plane to the big apple. Sara was immediately rushed into hair and makeup. Her team made a tiktok of her getting ready with rare beauty products and of course Sara was dubbed as a 'Queen' for being team Selena and there was excitement that she would be there.

Sara had a fun time, she met and took photos and videos with influencers and fans. It was the end of the night and her social battery was fading. She was having a glass of champagne with a couple of social media stars. To be honest, she didn't really view them as stars. They really didn't have any talents, or really worked hard or faced rejection. They were just pretty and turned on a camera. She felt bad saying that, but so far while some were nice, the ones she was speaking to gave off a bad, fake vibe.

"So Sara, what can you tell us about this upcoming season?" One of the guys said. All eyes turned to her, eager to see if she would reveal any spoilers.

She thought about it for a moment, wanting to give fans something, but not trying to reveal too much. Finally she said, with a sly smile on her face "Just expect the unexpected."

They all groaned, knowing that was all they were going to get from the star. The event ended at around midnight, and Sara and Selena went to a really late dinner to catch up on things. They spoke about their relationships and the drama with the Jenners and Kardashians. It was nice catching up with her, but eventually Sara had to leave to catch another flight to Vegas for Bella's party. AnnSophie was going to be there as well as Samira, so at least she wouldn't only know one person.

She was messaging Justin back and forth the next day. She was again back in hair and makeup with her friends before the car came. AnnSophie and Bella were filling her in on the Met Gala. "I wish you were there. It was so much fun." Sara wished that she could have attended the first Met, but her family was more important. "Yes, but there is always next year."

"Don't let Anna hear that. This is a prestigious event. If she heard you say that, you would probably be banned from attending." Sara had to roll her eyes at that. It was funny, when she was younger it was all about the exposure and trying to attend all of these high profile events. Now she didn't care, she just wanted to act and be left alone.

They took silly photos and tik tok videos before heading down to the car to go to the party. Outside there were paps everywhere. Kendall Jenner was there and Sara rolled her eyes, it was no secret that the tall model would go out of her way to be nasty to her. Kendall even tried to throw shade at Sara on instagram a few years ago. No one pointed it out until Kylie got dragged for the whole Selena fiasco.

"Sara!" She turned towards the voice and her eyebrows lifted in surprise as she saw the woman in question heading towards her. Photographers clicked away as Kendall threw her arms around her. She was sure the photographers caught her being stunned at the action. Surely it was going to be a hot topic the next day. "How are you? It's so nice to see you!"

As much as Sara wanted to say something nasty to Kendall, she didn't want to cause a fight at her best friend's party so she remained neutral. "I'm doing well, how about yourself?"

Kendall smiled. "Oh good, you know I've been preoccupied with Benito." The way she couldn't even pronounce the Spanish name. "Oh it's been so long since we caught up! Next time we are in town, you and Justin should double date with us!"

Sara smiled tightly. "Yeah, we will see. Our schedules are both busy."

"Sara!" She turned her head to see AnnSophie waving her down. "Oh look I got to go. It was nice talking with you!" She quickly walked away and joined her friends, who had a questioning look on their faces. She explained the story and everyone had the same conclusion. She was doing it to save face in the public eye. It was no secret that their reputation took a nosedive.

Once again, she found herself at a really late dinner with Bella after everything wrapped up. They were filling each other in on everything that happened in each other's lives. When Sara was done telling Bella about everything that happened with Justin she saw a smile on her friends face.

"Sara, I'm so happy for you. I'll admit that I had a lot of doubts about Justin. But he really grew up, and he did grow on me. He's not a stone cold Herman munster like I originally said." Sara snorted, remembering the first time the model gave him the moniker. "He really does love you, and that's all I ask from him, and that he doesn't hurt you again, otherwise I can't promise I wouldn't kick his ass."

Sara laughed. "I'm trying to imagine you taking him." Bella laughed. "Hey we kickbox you know. Also I'd enlist Gigi and AnnSophie."

Sara giggled again. "Yeah he could enlist Bosa and we'd be all fucked" Bella smiled into her drink. "Yeah but that Bosa wants to fight AnnSophie another way if you catch my drift." Sara nearly spit out her drink and the girls both combusted in a fit of giggles. "Hey If I'm ever single can you hook me up with Garoppolo?"

Sara rolled her eyes. "Oh please."

—--------------------------------------------------------------------

For some reason, it was like the universe hated Justin and Sara.

By the time she got back to Los Angeles he was gone in Eugene. He had a wedding to attend that he totally forgot about. He felt bad because it was one of his closest friends, after the wedding he had to be on a plane to New Jersey to attend a signing at a sporting expo with Derwin.

She got off the plane, not telling Erika that she was back home, however her best friend and employee wasn't stupid. The show was starting pre production and there were meetings. Sara spent her time at Justin's house rehearsing her lines, or went over to her co-star's house.

Finally after a week, she knew it was time to face the music. AnnSophie volunteered to be with her. Joey was back in Fort Lauderdale for a few weeks and Lexi's dad finally made time in his "super busy" calendar to spend time with his child.

As they pulled up to her house, AnnSophie could tell Sara was nervous. Her breath and her hands were so shaky she couldn't even drive. Grabbing her hand she rubbed it, hoping to calm her down a little bit. "Hey, it's going to be okay. She will know she is in the wrong." She nodded. "I just wish Justin was here, but I can't avoid her forever. We've closed the chapters of our pasts. I need to close this one."

They both got out of the car, each grabbing one of Sara's bags. Taking one last deep breath they entered the house. Eugene ran towards them, and despite Sara's hurt and anger she couldn't help but melt at the sight of the gray Bengal. "Hi baby." She cooed as she picked him up, pecking his face with kisses and she cuddled him. "I missed you so much. I'm sorry mommy had to leave you." She looked around while still carrying the cat. She turned towards the blonde supermodel. "She's not here." She took a deep breath, relieved that she still had some time to prepare a speech.

As she put everything away she messaged her sisters. They knew what was going on, and even unfriended Erika on all the platforms, surprisingly she never mentioned it on the phone.

Once she was done and clothes were in the washer she heard AnnSophie call her name. Walking over to her friend's voice in the kitchen she found AnnSophie starring with her mouth open in shock. Erika's work laptop that Sara bought her was open. That must have meant she ran out for a quick errand or food. She never left it open and unattended.

It happened in slow motion, AnnSophie turned the laptop around to face her. The first thing she saw was a document.

It was a medical document.

It was a record of a hospitalization

Sara's hospitalization in 2011 of her attempt.

A/N: Alright, just a smidge of drama one last time! Getting down to final chapters! Thank you to everyone who messaged me and read and stayed with me

#Justin Herbert #Alexa writes collide #nfl imagine

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cptnhook · 12 days

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INTRODUCTION: AYDEN HOOK 🪝

name: ayden hook

occupation: owner of "pandemonium" a burlesque club

birthday: july 14th, 1996 (28 years old)

pronouns: he/him

residency: carriage falls

hometown: california

faceclaim: paul mescal

BIOGRAPHY

triggers: abortion mention, mention of drugs and alcohol, drug-related death, mention of adult films.

Ayden was born an only child to James and Hannah. His father was an esteemed film producer who introduced Ayden to the film industry and made his love of cinema grow. His mother was an actress whose relationship with James wasn't meant to go beyond a short, spontaneous sexual relationship. Hannah's original decision was to have an abortion the night she found out she was pregnant, but James offered her a lifechanging sum of money to go through with the pregnancy and childbirth. Their relationship became nothing more than a transaction from that point on.

After Hannah gave birth, she took off. There was always a part of James that hoped she would change her mind and stay. James did his best not to take the rejection out on Ayden, he was always seen as a blessing. However, human emotions are difficult to predict and navigate at times, and James wound up burying himself in work. He tried to make Ayden a part of it. He brought him around the world, to every movie set and introduced him to all the stars. But more times than not, he would be left alone in hotel rooms, seated in front of a television, watching make-believe families, wondering why he didn't have siblings, a mother, or a real home himself.

As a teenager, his father thought he could help utilize their time together and Ayden began his acting career, starring in a few commercials and then appearing in TV shows and movies. After three years of working, he realized he would never become a star. He was always in the background and never had enough lines. The only upside was the friends he was making and the parties they would drag him to. By eighteen, acting was the farthest thing from his mind. The only thing he cared about were the Hollywood parties. He was on every drug, in every low-level gossip column, consequently dragging his father's name through the mud. Unsure of what to do, James cut his son off and forced him to attend a live-in rehab program. It was either that or he loses his trust fund.

His father's plan was executed perfectly because two years later, Ayden was out and clean. He wanted to get back into the movie business but decided he didn't want to be an actor himself. So at twenty one, he used his trust fund to kickstart his own movie production company. Only he wasn't producing normal movies, they were adult films. The business took off and Ayden became one of the largest producers of adult-rated movies in less than a year. However, with its success and the kind of business it was, the partying and the debauchery restarted. Ayden relapsed and convinced one of his actresses to join him. He didn't know, but the drug he offered her was laced and she died after snorting it. His father was so irate, he considered cutting ties with his son completely. But instead, he helped cover up the incident with his money and then exiled his son to Wilmington. It's where Ayden was conceived during one of James and Hannah's many vacations together. This was his final attempt to help his son clean up his life.

Ayden has been in Wilmington for a couple of years now and just recently started up another business, but this time moving away from film. However, he still has an eye for sex appeal and glamor. He's in love with the entertainment business and channeled that love into opening a burlesque club. His father would be proud. Everything is on the up-and-up — or is it?

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

friends: ayden could use friends of any kind! best friends, acquaintances, coworkers, exes turned friends, etc.

employees: if anyone wants to work at his burlesque club! that would be dope.

father: if anyone wants to play his father who's a bigtime movie producer, i wouldn't be opposed lol

enemies: i love banter, so if anyone wants to go back and forth with ayden, exchanging tit-for-tat, that would be fun

good influence: someone who's trying to help him steer clear of his former lifestyle and make sure he succeeds

bad influence: someone who's maybe a party goer who doesn't mind pushing ayden's boundaries when it comes to his sobriety

#wnc.intro #pinned

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couplesrehabus · 5 months

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Orange County Couples Rehab: A Transformative Journey to Sobriety and Connection

Embarking on the journey of couples rehab signifies more than a commitment to sobriety. It's a shared experience where love intersects with recovery, leading to strengthened bonds and a joyous, substance-free life. In this article, we delve into the world of Orange County Couples Rehab, exploring its mission, services, and the transformative journey it offers.

About Couples Rehab

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couplesrehabusa · 2 months

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Couples rehab

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theycallme-thejackal · 2 years

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Oooh, please a continuation of ‘I’m tired of sleeping alone’.

Pairing: Lenny Bruce & Midge Maisel Rated T

Part 1 | Part 2

Midge has never been so nervous for taping the show.

It had been Gordon's idea to keep her on during interviews, and she was thrilled about it. More screen time means more opportunities to make people laugh. Make them fall in love with her.

But if there was ever a night she didn't want to share that couch with someone, it's tonight. Because the very special guest for the entire show is one Lenny Bruce.

"I thought it would be a nice surprise," Gordon tells her. "You're friends, right?"

"Yeah," she replies, plastering a smile onto her face as her fiancé wraps his arms around her waist. "Yeah, it's great. I just...thought he was in California, so it's a big surprise."

"He didn't call you?" Gordon asks.

"Maybe he did, but Zelda's terrible with messages - you know that," she reasons.

"Oh, boy, do I." He laughs softly and gives her a quick kiss. "See you out there, honey."

She drops her smile as he walks away, and she sees Lenny standing not too far off. She averts her gaze, instead watching as Gordon greets the audience.

"Sorry I didn't say anything," Lenny says, suddenly at her side. "He wanted to surprise you."

Midge scoffs. "Like you give a shit what he wants."

"Oh, I definitely don't care what he wants," he agrees, taking a drag of his cigarette. "But I care very much about what you want."

"Lenny." She turns to face him fully and takes a deep breath. "I have to go out there and be funny for two minutes. And then I have to be funny for the rest of the show while sitting next to you, who I'm mad at, and I'm not a very good actress, so do me a favor and don't make this harder than it already is."

She turns back to watch Gordon, and Lenny is mercifully silent.

The show goes...surprisingly well.

Lenny is immensely charming. So much so that for the time they sit on the couch together, talking to Gordon, her anger melts away, and she's able to just exist in this rhythm that she's always had with him. Setup, punchline, one-up the punchline over and over until one of them concedes. It's fun. She's missed having fun with him.

"You said you were just friends," Gordon says from the door of her dressing room.

Midge meets his gaze in the mirror as she takes off her earrings. "We are just friends," she insists.

"Then why'd I feel like a third wheel that entire interview?"

Midge shrugs, slipping out of her heels. "Lenny's been there from the beginning of my career. It's always easy to joke with him."

Gordon steps inside, closing the door behind him, and Midge knows a serious conversation is about to happen. "Did you sleep with him?" He asks.

She considers denying the existence of that one night in a very blue hotel room, but her mouth works faster than her brain, and she says, "Once. About a year ago."

He sighs and shakes his head. "I knew it. You're the girl."

Midge turns to look at him in confusion. "What on earth are you talking about, the girl?" She asks.

"The girl who got Lenny Bruce to get his act together. To go to rehab. To turn his life around. The girl he's apparently been in love with ever since his first marriage ended."

She stares at him, mouth agape. "That's absurd," she insists. "It was just one night."

"Did you want it to be?"

"Did I want it to be what?"

Gordon takes a couple steps closer. "Did you want it to be just one night?"

She purses her lips. No. No, she didn't want it to be one night. She wanted it to be a thousand nights. She never wanted that one night to end. But it did, and then any chance at more was killed by a horrible conversation at a theater on the corner of 57th and 7th.

"It doesn't matter what I wanted then," she tells him. "I'm marrying you, Gordon."

"But you don't really want to...you want to be with him."

Midge exhales and turns back to her mirror, packing up her things. "This is ridiculous," she mutters.

"No it's not," Gordon tells her, resting a hand on her back.

She feels her throat constrict. She is so tired of crying over Lenny. "Gordon - "

"I saw the way you two looked at each other out there. He's nuts about you, Miriam. And I'm pretty sure you're in love with him, too."

She tries and fails not to cry, a tear spilling over and hitting the vanity below her. Gordon rubs her back soothingly. "I don't want to be," she whispers after a moment. "More than anything in this world, I wish I didn't love him."

"I wish you didn't, too," he tells her with a soft smile.

She turns her head to look up at him, cupping his jaw with her hand. "I'm so sorry, Gordon," she tells him honestly. "I really, really am."

"It's okay," he promises. "I'd rather know now before it's too late. I don't want to be married to someone who doesn't love me."

Midge sighs, and Gordon pulls her into a hug, arms wrapped around her waist. When they part a moment later, she gives him a soft kiss. "You're gonna make some lucky woman very happy someday."

"Yeah, I know," he jokes, and she laughs. She takes off the ring and offers it, but he waves her off. "Keep it. You're still my work wife, after all."

Her brows lift in surprise. "You mean I still have my job?"

"You really think I'd fire you over this? Give me a little credit here, Miriam."

She wraps her arms around his neck, hugging him gratefully. "You really are a very good man," she tells him.

"Tell me something I don't know."

#midgelenny #midge x lenny #midgexlenny #tmmm fanfic #marvelous mrs. maisel fanfic #writing prompt #otp: more important than god #jackal fics #answers #there is already another request for more #so another is coming up later

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aur0ras-a · 6 months

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JUNE 12TH 1954 , laura cunningham gives birth to the oldest of two children : christine noelle dunne. her dad phillip cunningham is absent from her birth , giving the excuse of work.

DECEMBER 1958 , under the guise that phillip is offered a better paying job the cunninghams move to pittsburgh , pennsylvania. the truth is much uglier but never surfaces in the small time. laura cunningham had maxed out credit cards and overdrawn bank accounts , leaving their house for foreclosure.

AUGUST 1961 , chrissy starts school at the local elementary. being new puts her on the outskirts of a lot of the children. but it's graham dunne that she quickly befriends , forming a life long friendship with him. the older she grows , the more her time begins being spent at the dunne residence more then her own. it's this same year that her younger brother is born.

MAY 1972 , chrissy graduates high school. also the year that she stops dating jason carver. finally finding her voice to say no to him , she's abandoned at prom. after a teary phone call to graham , his older brother billy shows to take her to prom. it's where they share their first kiss and become something more then friends. MAY 1972 , chrissy graduates high school. also the year that she stops dating jason carver. finally finding her voice to say no to him , she's abandoned at prom. after a teary phone call to graham , his older brother billy shows to take her to prom. it's where they share their first kiss and become something more then friends. JUNE 1972 , chrissy moves to california with the band. college was originally the direction in life. but her love for billy was what easily made the decision when he showed at her door. she believed in him, she believed in the dunne brothers. 1974 - 1975 , billy and the rest of the six leave for their first tour. chrissy stays behind , her attempt to go to school at a local community college doesn't last long. she discovers she's pregnant a few months into the band being away , leaving her to drop out of college. she keeps it a secret from billy , knowing that he'll leave music behind once he knows. aware of his drug use , chrissy doesn't believe it's that bad until she visits the band on tour , finding billy with fans in a van outside. it's after this that she tells him she is pregnant with no other choice , and makes him promise to get his self together for the birth of their daughter. APRIL 2nd 1975 , marlee rose dunne is born. chrissy gives birth alone , billy still being on tour. when he doesn't show, she's informed by teddy price he's made the choice to go to rehab.

APRIL TO JUNE 1975 , chrissy stays in california. with no income from the band , she like the others gets a job. she waits tables when she can. marlene dunne visits to help her with marlee until billy returns home and the couple is able to get settled. once billy returns home , they make the decision to finally get married. MARCH 1976 , at a photoshoot for the six's upcoming album , the photographer passes along chrissy a card. it's to a talent agency. the card stays on their kitchen counter for what seems like months , before she's encouraged by billy to give them a call and start her own career. she lands her first part as a supporting role in small time movie. OCTOBER 1976 , chrissy finds out that she is pregnant with a set of twins. this places her own career on the backburner , focusing instead on her family. JULY 1977 , visiting off and on during the tour , chrissy and marlee join the six for their longest stent. they visit pittsburgh for time off , and it's here when chrissy gives birth to a set of twin girls : lacy and caroline dunne.

JULY 1977 ( continued ) , chrissy believes that her worst fears have come true and billy has been unfaithful since daisy jones has come into their life. with growing tensions between eddie roundtree and billy , eddie tells billy that he and chrissy have had an affair ( which proves to be untrue ). with these events unfolding , chrissy makes the decision to leave unable to support billy a second time through his thought infidelity.

JANUARY 1978, billy returns home from his second trip to rehab. once life becomes normal for them again , chrissy begins to follow her own acting career once again. she lands her first leading role during this time.

JUNE - OCTOBER 1978 , chrissy finds out she is pregnant with their last child : theodore graham dunne. she continues to act as long as she can , supporting billy through his first album that eventually fails to catch traction.

#❛ ♡ study : 𝘢 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘮.#( this may be off a few dates but its finally done )#( the way i almost typed dunne )

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phantom-of-the-ruckus · 1 year

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Amyrose Kruber

Note: I wanted to draw Priscilla first, but I owed this redesign for quite a while and it was time to give poor Amy an update. Priscilla will be next (hopefully)

TW: for mentions of death, abuse, and murder

Full name: Amyrose Jeanette Kruber

Nicknames: Ms. Kruber, Amy, AJ Kruber (just by Jake)

Age: 40-50s, two years younger than Owen

Active Status: Deceased (cannon), Alive (Hello Sisterhood)

Date of Birth: November 27, of most likely 1945-1950

Time of death: Around season 2 of the show (when the puppets were alive)

Cause of death: Strangulation (Murdered by Mortimer and Riley; death placed as suicide)

Love interest: Owen Gubberson (Unintended rejection in Cannon), Jake Bowen (Cannon Divergent universe)

Family: Owen Gubberson (Husband in Hello Sister Universe and other AUs), Amelia Kruber (Mother †), Earl Kruber (Father †), Rosemary Kruber (Sister †), Rebecca Kruber (Niece), Hannah Jenkins (Niece), Sarabeth "Beth" Jenkins (Grand-Niece), Mathew Jenkins (Nephew-in-law †), Anthony Pierson (Grand-Nephew-in-law), Exliza Dollison (Adopted daughter/ Shared universe with @dolly-royal), Priscilla Gubberson (sister-in-law), Arthur Gubberson (father-in-law. Hello Sisterhood and other universes) the handeemen and Scout (adoptive step-children just in Hello Sisterhood)

Friends: HQ crew, Handeemen (just in hello sisterhood and others AUs), Owen Gubberson, Jake Bowen, Matilda Screecher, Rachel letterer, Joel, Priscilla Gubberson, Samuel Burlington, the Burlington family

Enemies: The handeemen (cannon divergent and technically in cannon), Rachel Breadstone (Not friends not enemies), Victor Pierson (cannon divergence)

Job: Ventriloquist at Burlington's Co and Entertainment, puppeteer, co-director of the Handeemen Studios (Hello Sisterhood)

Amy was born in Texas and moved to Nashville, Tennessee at the age of 3. She was the second daughter of Amelia and Earl Kruber, and the youngest sister of Rosemary Kruber. She had a rough life in Tennessee after her father started to drink and become abusive towards her and her family. Amy has a scar in her back after her father threw a glass bottle when she was 5 years of age. Eventually, Amelia reported her Earl for domestic Abuse and he was sent to rehab when Amy was 14 years old. However, Amelia remained married to Earl.

Around this time, Rosemary took her to see a ventriloquist in town for her birthday. Amy became fascinated and decided to pursue a career of becoming a ventriloquist. She eventually left home at the age of 18 to live with her cousins in San Diego, California (just two years after Earl returned, but the abuse did end) where she further her education in the arts, and became a puppeteer for children shows, and adult audiences. At the age of 28 she started to puppeteer for puppet shows, and became affiliated temporarily with the Jim Henson company to puppeteer for 10 years until she became affiliated with the Burlington entertainment company and had a show on her own in one of their entertainment places. This was her job for the rest of her life and career.

She met Owen Gubberson when he came into a bar she was hosting a show. She recognized him from the convention and Mortimer's Handeemen pilot. They talked a bit and became friends ever since after talking endlessly about puppets. Both eventually developed feelings for the other.

Amy helped Owen with his company and show through covering for puppeteers and give him some advice in the show business. However, she made clear that she had no intentions in joining the Handeemen Studios, but would gladly referrer to Owen for future investors and producers. They also had a couple of fights regarding Owen's micromanaging, but Amy didn't involve herself too much on his business

After the success of the first season, the studios had a small party (Mortimer was alive around this point). Amy took Owen for a dance, and they were having a good time. Eventually a slow song hit, and Amy decided to build some courage and tell Owen that she loved him. Owen being in shock because Amy liked him back but also having, so social skills at all stays quite unable to tell her "I love you too" which Amy takes as a rejection from his part. Owen did try to reach out to her the next day but she interrupted him and told him they were better off as friends as she jokes "It is better than just me hangin' like a doll, ya know"

She started to develop feelings for Jake Bowen (same with him) after the two started to become close, but she decided not to move forward as she still loved Owen. They never mentioned their feelings.

As the months began to pass, strange events involving the puppets occurred, and many problems with Rachel, Amy and Owen's relationship slowly went downhill. After the book was revealed. Amy had a small confrontation about Owen and what was going on. Owen desperately tried to tell her that Mortimer was alive and brought the others as well, and in vain tries to make Mortimer talk to Amy which she angrily says "Mortimer is just a puppet!" before leaving just as Mortimer mocks Owen about playing dead.

That same night, Amy starts to have regrets and sends Owen an apology via a phone message before she receives a call from Owen (which was actually Mortimer) about meeting in the studio to talk and help him with his office. Just as Amy enters she is captured by the puppets and is hanged at the main stage carrying a fake suicide note. She died as she saw Owen rushing to save her This is also at the same time Mortimer hints to Owen about a small surprise and Jake coming to the studio to pick some stuff but getting distracted by a scream. Owen rips the rope and embraces as he apologizes and laments about not saying he loved her too. Jake arrives and has a small fight with Owen asking about what happened. The police arrive and declared that Amy committed suicide.

During the press, Owen tries to talk with Rosemary about what happened as it was rumored Owen murdered Amy, but Rose cuts him off and tells him that she doesn't want to hear anything about him or "his stupid puppet company" as she blames him for Amy's death. This would lead to Rosemary sheltering her daughters (Rebecca and Hannah) and her grandchildren (Sarabeth and her cousins. Rose is Beth's grandmother) from the anything related to the Handeemen and puppets in general.

------

In Hello Sisterhood, the history is mostly the same except the puppets were brought much later due to Owen wanting to save his show from low ratings. The spell turned them Human, but this was after season 1. During the party where Amy confessed to Owen, he had the courage to tell her he loves her back and the two become a couple. After the whole good puppets brought to life, Amy and Owen decide to work together and merge their job thus becoming the directors of what is the studio in Hello Sisterhood.

The lore in the fanfic is different due to being written before the midnight show.

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Some small trivia about Amy

She was my first OC created and was intended to be Owen's love interested and a parallel to the main puppet duo in a former idea (this was in 2021) about the backstory of the puppets.

Sarabeth was always intended to be her grandniece, but the whole taboo with Owen's company was not implemented yet.

An inside joke I have with Amber is that Amy is like the Kenny of my universe, she constantly gets killed.

In other AUs she features in, she's Owen's wife, and Hello Sisterhood is probably the only AU where she's Owen's girlfriend but soon to be his wife.

In the academy AU part 1, Amy will take a role inspired by Host as she will help Scout around as "The Mourning Widow" but is a separate AU.

There is a chance she might be mentioned in "Once Upon a Midnight Dreary" as Dr. Gubberson's dead dove/former love in the Poe Fashion

Amy has a bast collection of sweaters she likes to wear. During summer, she has squared pattern blouses she hears. She likes to cover her scars, but she just wears those clothes because she just loves them.

Her favorite films are Dirty Dancing and Grease.

Favorite Musical is a Day in the Park with George and into the woods.

Also, she got Owen to dress as a flower to her bumblebee costume. Everyone said the flower looked rather withered due to Owen's frown

#hello puppets #Amy Kruber (OC)#Amy (OC)#owen gubberson #jake bowen #tw: child abuse #tw: mentions of abuse #tw: mentions of alcohol #Tw: mentions of alcohol abuse #tw: death #tw: murder #tw: strangulation #deceased character

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chezzabellesworld · 6 months

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Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love

I’ve just Gotta stay from the start of that, I’m Mies by both of these people they both have had a heavy influence of me in my 20s, I know there are many conspiracies about about Courtney maybe killing her or having him done by somebody else while she was in California and he escaped rehab now she tried very very hard to pursue it.

She even sent him a heart-shaped box. Yes that’s where that metaphor comes from inside the box with little dolls, candles, and other little things treat trinkets he never called Courtney back, but Dave would talk to Courtney on the phone for hours and then ended up talking to her. They changed the date of when they got together. They may have run in the same circles but it didn’t mean they were together at that time. She says many different things and we, as we know Courtney Love can be a massive liar. The story constantly changes and she’s ready to write out her celebrity friends Drew Barrymore who is meant to be the godmother to her child after Rosemary Carol who is going to write her out for Kurt death got changed to Drew Barrymore then blind items Courtney was gonna say truth about Drew after they weren’t friends Courtney strikes me at someone who may have bipolar and borderline personality disorder. They say Kurt had bipolar kind of agree, but I believe that Courtney actually is more sociopathic. Her dad says it because her dad is a self proclaimed one well was he’s not with us anymore, and he wrote a book about her which I am dying to read. I might see if it’s on my audiobook so anyway what I want to talk about or a few placements in the charts so here we go.

Courtney Love is a cancer son, a cancer moon, Leo Mercury Mars in Gemini, Venus in Gemini, but in retrograde, which only happens once every couple of years for 2 1/2 weeks, Kurt Cobain Kurt was a Pisces son, a cancer moon, a Pisces mercury, a Pisces, Venus and a Scorpio, so if you wanna look at the logistically on the uni part if Courtney is a Libra rising her riding pull into Kurt second house which would be his body and finances your security. It is ruled by Taurus your second house, so anything to do with materialistic the home finances. Her physical body is going to fall in that and she did try and like get him to do Lala Palooza. She did try to get him to make all this money. He bought a car for her that he took back the next day because it wasn’t him then also had Gemini Mars and Venus, which is her sexual attributes and what did I say guys I said when someone is mood Mars and Venus Mars, Venus, not moon, Mars and Venus’s are conjunction , be careful because they can be ever so charming, and you can fall for that, and it can be really electrifying, my example would be for court falling for that is when he’s on stage and he says he’s that she’s the best he’s ever had basically. So the 10th house rules finances it rules hire up government law money, all those things that she could tampered with, and I am getting a strong feeling that she did right now, since she did forge things for her, sometimes with him being out of it so much and sometimes with him not just even knowing going into his industry with her so he’s a Virgo rising, so his Virgo rising is gonna be in her house so his physical body is in the Pisces house of drugs, alcohol, delusions and addiction and many people will say that she was the one who got him on drugs which I can totally believe she seems like one of those people called Kelly Osborne, Jack, all of them on it if you wanna believe what tabloid say but the same story shouldn’t keep coming up. If it’s not true, you see what I’m saying and it was so he didn’t have a physical ascendant so into her 12 house is Scorpio a second house so Mars is your sexual energy in your energy, so finances could be a problem on both end of them, but his energy was into that and it could’ve been. He felt inspired by how she put herself out there and wanted to do it too. Has been on the third house of chat about talking about it and getting to know each other about it and then they can’t moons it’s cancer fall into the 11th house of friendship and they did have a good friendship together as a relationship couple as you should as you should I’m not saying how you should have it because everybody is different but also he’s a Virgo rising. He was obviously born on a full moon because his player because his son sign is Pisces, and where his Venus and his mercury and his son fall into that seventh house which is relationship with the public and relationships of people that’s why he was adored by so many people and still is to this seat.

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team-downey-1965 · 2 years

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NEWS!! Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey, the power couple coming together for a podcast that will center on the Synoanon Cult, a former California-based experimental drug rehab facility, and community

Source:

#susan downey and robert downey jr #new podcast #team downey

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thestraggletag · 2 years

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The Changeling, Chapter 1

Rating: M

Summary: Belle and Lacey had always been as different as two twins could possibly be, but always ready to do whatever it took for each other. Which includes Belle putting her life in pause to replace Lacey in hers as she checked herself into rehab to kick a drinking habit that could potentially end her modelling career. All she had to do is attend some fittings, do a couple of photoshoots, avoid if possible the slimey and two-timing Killian Jones and steer clear of Lacey's boss, Mr Gold, and his suspicious nature.

How difficult could it possibly be?

A/N: This is my Rumbelled version of A Change of Place. Fic will have a total of around 6 (or perhaps 7) chapters.

“Lacey, honey! So good to have you back! How was the West Coast?”

Belle blinked, trying not to jump out of her skin when a tall woman dressed in a red maxi dress ran over to her and embraced her. ‘Be Lacey’, she told herself over and over, like she had done often in the past, when they had played at being each other to fool people.

“I missed you too Ruby.”

It was easy to recognise her from Lacey’s descriptions, even without the bright red streak in her hair. Like her sister had told her she was loud and charming, personality exuding out of her. She could easily picture her and Lacey being best friends, going to parties and turning heads everywhere. She was glad she was on their side and knew of the whole damned mess.

“We have so much to catch on, hon. Let’s go somewhere more private, ok?”

She barely got time to admire the well-preserved Gothic revival details of the main foyer of the House of Gold, a building reminiscent of the Barbizon. Its sheer size and appearance spoke of power and wealth, but also of style and elegance. She wished she had the time to take it all in, wished she was simply visiting her sister at her place of work instead of trying to pass herself off as her. She told herself not to touch her hair, held up by bobby pins, a lot of hair lacquer, and a prayer, and followed her sister’s friend up an elevator.

She was soon whisked away to one of the middle floors, where she could tell most of the clothes were produced. It was all a mess of fabrics, feathers, rhinestones and forms, with people hovering over sewing machines and aligning sequins in different patterns. Ruby walked straight to a corner partially covered by folding screens. Behind was a small couch and a coffee table. It was clearly a well-used hidden little nook, one Lacey had mentioned was in constant use whenever the time came to start fitting the dresses to the models, before they were even finished. Given that the fashion house was meant to be months away from the nearest showing it looked like things were rather advanced, to Belle’s admittedly untrained eye. From what she knew from facetiming Lacey this was supposed to be a rather quiet time, specially for the models. It was the main reason why Lacey had chosen then to go visit her in California and why she had agreed to the switch, really, especially since it was supposed to be for months.

“You’ll hardly have to do any work, I promise! You’ll get to hole up at my fabulous apartment to do your thesis and enjoy a bit of life in the Big Apple! It’ll mostly be like a vacation.”

To Ruby’s credit, she waited till they were sitting down to lose it on her.

“Is Lacey mad? What the hell was she thinking? What the hell were you thinking? From what Lacey told me about you you were supposed to be the responsible twin! The level-headed one! You should’ve said no!”

Belle had thought that, over and over, on her plane ride from California to New York. It was a stupid idea and would never work. But Lacey was her little sister. Younger by minutes but still. Her responsibility, now that both their parents were dead. She owed her this. This chance to turn things around.

“You wanted me to tell Lacey that I wouldn’t help her get into rehab? Help her quit drinking? When I’ve been wanting for years for her to even admit she has a problem?”

She had told herself this too, when Lacey had shown up out of nowhere in the small apartment in Rosindale, near Berkeley. California reminded her a bit of Australia, which was nice, but the real reason why she had chosen to move there after graduating from Columbia was to pursue her PhD in Library Science and train, at the same time, at the North West Document Conservation Centre. She was hoping, after finishing her degree and the courses she was taking, to be able to work for museums or, if she was lucky, in the curatorial department of some major library. Her work at the university library was nice, but antique books were her passion.

She hadn’t expected Lacey to show up at her home at all, taking into account she was supposed to be on the other side of the country, living the glamorous life of a Manhattan-based model. And though she had at first acted flippant, as if she had simply decided to impulsively visit her sister, she had eventually come clean about things. She had spoken in vague terms, and Belle hadn’t pushed for more, about increasing blackouts, bad decisions and regrets that were beginning to pile up. Then she talked about how when they were younger they used to play-act as each other and see whether they could fool their parents. Belle had read between the lines and told her she was crazy if she thought she was going to try a switch, like they did when they were girls.

“I’m scared, Bluebelle. I’ve never been scared this way before.”

That had decided her, then and there. She would see it through, how difficult could it possibly be? She had told herself over and over as she drove Lacey to a very private rehab centre and later took a flight to New York. She could continue with her thesis long-distance, her advisor preferred they meet virtually anyway. It was doable, and worth it. And it would only be for three months. Lacey needed that opportunity and she owed it to her sister to help her get it. Ruby, on the other hand, seemed to be more pessimistic about the whole thing.

“It’s just a couple of photoshoots and some fittings, right? I can do that.”

“Except that Lacey checked into rehab before I could tell her the house is pushing the fall show forward to avoid the competition getting wind of our designs like it happened in the last two shows. They bumped the date by six weeks, and Lacey’s program does not allow for contact with the outside world except in case of emergencies for the first whole month. So this means you will have to do a lot of the preparatory work and the pre-show, at least till we’re able to contact Lacey and get her to come back. Bosses want to give a sneak-peek to a few select names to further avoid being scooped.”

“A show? What do you mean a show?”

Ruby was looking her up and down, as if he was analysing every detail of her body. Surprisingly it did not feel creepy or objectifying, though it did make her feel anxious. Though Lacey and her were twins, she knew she wasn’t in shape the way Lacey was.

“Your measurements are not exactly Lacey’s. You have a bit more of a waist and thighs, and less breasts. Some padding will take care of the latter, and I suppose I can secretly get Granny to let out some of the clothes, but it won’t be enough. You gotta lose some weight or Joanna, the main fitter, will notice. We gotta get you ready for the pre-show events at least, and then we can adjust the clothes again for Lacey when she comes back. Granny will see to that. And so Lacey will handle the actual show, don’t worry about it. We’ll give her a call as soon as we’re able."

Belle took a few moments to be indignant about the remarks on her body. Sure, she wasn’t as thin as Lacey, and her breasts were more on the modest side, but that was because they were real. Then the reality of her situation sunk in and she began to panic.

“I can’t do this. I can’t do a show, or a pre-show, or whatever the fuck you’re talking about. I was psyching myself up for a fucking photoshoot, but a show? With an audience? No fucking way!”

Ruby seemed to be fully in agreement with her, which was nice.

“I know! Look, no offence, but fashion shows are gruelling and they’re an art form. Lacey is the face of the collection, so she’ll feature centre stage on that night. It’s more than okay to go get her back. Her career is everything to her. I’m sure she can arrange for a rehab stay later.”

It was that last sentence that gave Belle pause. She had accompanied her sister to the rehab centre at her request, so she would not chicken out last minute. Lacey had been determined but clearly uneasy, as if it had taken a lot to convince herself to take that last step. She could not undo the effort her sister had put into confronting her problem and making the decision to get better.

“If I pull Lacey out of rehab she’s not going to return. I can’t do that to her, Ruby. At least not right now, not when she’s taking the first steps. We’ll call her after the first mandated 28 days if we have to, but only if we have to. She needs this.”

To the model’s benefit she seemed to agree and be equally worried, before a determined expression settled across her face.

“If you’re staying then I’m helping you. Lacey’s a great friend and she deserves a break. She’s helped me more than once, I would be a bitch if I didn’t return the favour.”

Belle could see in Ruby the fierce loyalty that her twin tended to inspire in people, and though she hadn’t always been grateful for it she was now.

“Thank you, Ruby.”

“Don’t mention it. By the way, we gotta go visit Jefferson. He’s been asking about you and I told him I’d keep an eye on you and send you up to him when you got here. Gave me the perfect opportunity to intercept you and catch you up to speed.”

Jefferson’s office was as chaotic as Lacey had described, sketches, fabric samples and rhinestones littering every single surface not covered by half-finished dresses draped across forms or splayed across tables, a moodboard dominating the back wall. The man himself fit his environment, from the top hat barely clinging to his head to the mismatched socks, the brown brogues he must have arrived with carelessly kicked to a side of the desk. His hair was dishevelled, as if he had pulled at it till it was sticking in all directions, though the mess added to his handsomeness. Lacey had described him as “sinfully beautiful” and Belle could see why.

“There’s my Chesire cat! Lacey, darling, so good to see you!”

Jefferson was as exuberant as she had been led to believe, dramatically flinging himself at her, his long arms easily lifting her off the ground before unceremoniously letting her go. Like Ruby had reassured her the designer was respectful, his hands never wandering and his gaze warm and admiring without being predatory. Clearly Lacey and him got along like a house on fire, so she hoped the extra work that pushing the launch of the collection would produce would keep him too busy to interact much with her. He would surely notice the difference otherwise.

“I’m so glad you’re here, it’s been so chaotic with the new launch date and everyone making insane demands upon my artistry. Gold in particular has been a veritable beast. Man walks around like he’s about to bite someone’s head off. His accent has gotten out of hand. I would say something, except it’s kind of hot, you know?”

Rowan Gold. Founder and owner of the fashion house that bore his name, where Lacey had gotten her big break in spite of her less than ideal height and her sometimes problematic temper. A business giant in the art world, who had dealt in antiques before turning his attention to fashion and creating one of the leading fashion brands in the world, known for its whimsical, cutting-edge designs. And, according to her sister, an asshole. An irredeemable, unlovable asshole. Mean for sport. The type of man who would for sure fire any model that wound up caught in a scandal of any kind, even one as tame as doing a stint in rehab for substance abuse, something almost provincial in the modelling world.

“He’s just got this stick up his ass which I am almost 100% sure it’s because he hasn’t gotten any since the Great Depression or something.”

Lacey had never had a good thing to say about him, other than he dressed sharply, something her twin always thought important and partly the reason why Belle herself had developed her own very curated sense of fashion. Though both twins had different tastes, Lacey had always approved of her bold choices and her eye for quality.

“There’s no reason to dress like a librarian simply because you want to be one.”

Most of Belle’s admittedly expensive wardrobe came from Lacey, whose connections in the industry guaranteed her heavy discounts and often free clothing, a lot of which wasn’t her particular style and got sent straight to her. It was always a nice surprise to find a package waiting for her, with a note attached in Lacey’s careless handwriting: “Got this and thought of you!” It was the sort of thing that made Lacey so easy to love and so difficult to say no to, the reason why Belle was determined to not back down. All she needed to do was one measly fashion show. With a bit of practice and Ruby to help her she was sure she could do it.

“Yeah, well, Gold can relax. I’m here and ready to work!”

“And thank God for that! By the way… have you gained weight? Cause that’s gonna be a problem.”

Belle felt she couldn’t relax till she was in Lacey's apartment, alone and free from having to pretend to be her sister. She hurried towards the bathroom, wanting to get rid of the heavy make-up and the spray that kept her hair in the teased updos her twin favoured. No matter how much she had prepared for it, how much Lacey had told her about what to expect from anyone who could potentially want to speak with her, it had all been an utter disaster. She was glad no one had noticed how she’d clung to Ruby as she was caught up on the exciting news regarding the new date for the fall fashion show and what it would mean for her upcoming schedule. Afterwards Ruby had sympathetically offered her a pep talk before guiding her to one of the company cars with the express instruction to get some rest.

“The real work starts tomorrow. Might want to consider an early morning run by the way. Gotta get as close to Lacey’s measurements as possible. Granny can help with the bra padding, but you gotta do the rest.”

Lacey’s building was blessedly near, where the Garment District met Chelsea. It was a renovated rowhouse, preserving as much of its historical charm as possible. Not the type of building her twin would’ve picked, but apparently she had gotten the apartment through some sort of arrangement with the fashion house at a discounted price, certainly nothing to scoff at in the competitive real estate world of NYC. Belle loved the soft blue and gold wallpaper along the walls and the plaster crown moulding with its faded patina and spidery cracks. There was a French balcony with a few potted plants she quickly tended to and a reading nook with a built-in bookshelf bellow that sported the few books Lacey owned, mostly murder mysteries and spy thrillers, with the occasional biography sprinkled about.

She unpacked what little she had brought and did a bit of research on the neighbourhood, looking up a couple of promising running trails before opening the website for the New York Public Library, to make an appointment for a virtual consultation from an expert in the Rare Books division. There was a good chance something in their repository would be relevant to her research topic, and it felt helpful to do something she was good at. Tomorrow she would worry about fittings and fashion shows. Tonight she had books.

Waking up at five in the morning to fit in an early run before meeting Ruby for a coffee and some strategizing was a bad start to what looked like a lousy day. It took them the better part of it to devise a master plan of sorts regarding the next four weeks. Belle would need to be available to the House every day, for fittings and the like, so she would wake up early to sneak in a morning run and be at work promptly at 8 AM. She would meet with Ruby and Granny so the seamstress would know what dresses she needed to let out from previous collections, based on the photoshoots scheduled that week. Belle would model them to make sure they fit. After that Ruby would secure a corner somewhere to teach her how to walk the runway. It was a blessing that Belle was already fond of sky-high heels and so balance and endurance weren’t a problem, but there was more to walking like a model than being able to stand stilettos. There was a certain strut to it, a way to move the body and command attention, that Belle despaired over ever mastering to the extent her sister did. Lacey was magnetic, always had been, the twin most people gravitated towards. And that had always suited Belle just fine, except that now she needed to learn to step into the spotlight.

Jefferson, as it turned out, commanded a lot of her time. He had begun to sketch feverishly, which was welcome news after their original sketches for the fall show were compromised. This meant that the designer was absentminded, his head somewhere else half the time. This suited Belle just dine, since Jefferson’s familiarity with Lacey meant he would’ve likely spotted the switch otherwise. Though he seemed to sense, or at least feel, that something was different about her, it wasn’t enough to make him overly suspicious.

Though it was nice when all of his attention wasn’t on her, Belle soon found it preferable to being around Ashley. The young model was cute in a very girl-next-door way that Jefferson seemed to find somewhat lacking, often comparing her All-American looks with Belle’s- or rather Lacey’s- more interesting features. This clearly did not endear her to the blonde, who was borderline rude every time they shared the same space. Her constant digs at her age- at twenty-nine, it was true that Lacey was well past the usual age for retirement in the modelling business- did not bother Belle, but she could sense Ashley could become a bigger issue if her behaviour escalated.

“One last twirl? Mmh, still not sure about that silhouette, it’s not sitting on you the way it was a few weeks ago. Next one?”

Belle smiled at Jefferson, biting back a sigh of disappointment. She felt like she had been trying outfits for days now, but the designer seemed not to notice, looking feverish as he scribbled notes on the sketch corresponding to the outfit she was wearing. She trudged back to the set of folding screens that had been set up for her privacy, grabbing a nude-and-black outfit that did not make much sense on the hanger. When it was on she was glad that clearly Granny had gotten to it at some point and made the necessary alterations. It was more akin to a bondage garment than a haute couture piece, and the skirt tight, and the skirt in particular was meant to wrap around her legs in what she imagined was an alluring way, but paired with heels it made walking a chore.

She was halfway across the room, thinking that perhaps she was getting the hang of the skirt, when she tripped, her stiletto heels slipping from beneath her. The skirt didn’t allow her to compensate for it, sending her tumbling to the floor. Out of nowhere, however, someone grabbed her by the waist, giving her the leverage she needed to find her footing. Looking up she found that her saviour was a mysterious new person, a man dressed sharply in a dark grey suit and black tie, with the only nod towards colour being the burgundy swath of silk peeking out of the breast pocket. He had greying hair a tad longer than what was fashionable and though he looked older than most people she saw in the building, he made it look good. Lacey had always teased her about her preference towards older men, which Belle had always thought was a bit of an exaggeration, but she could not deny the man was her type. A silver fox through and through. Belle could not help but smile up at him, for once not feeling shy at the idea of meeting someone new who she was supposed to already know, since she was pretending to be her sister.

“Thank you, that was a close call.”

The man blinked, as if confused by something. Belle smiled wider, hoping to put him at ease. If anything it seemed to confuse him more, his soft brown eyes glued to her mouth for what felt like forever. Then he blinked, and the warmth seemed to seep right out of his face. His expression turned glacial and he let go of her waist, so suddenly that she stumbled before righting herself.

“Seems a bit too early to be drinking, doesn’t it Miss French?”

As Belle felt indignation curl deep in her gut her mind quickly processed that this was, most likely, Mr Gold, owner of the fashion house and, according to Lacey, one of the main reasons why her going to rehab had to be kept secret. It seemed obvious, both from what her sister had implied and from what the man himself had just said, that he had not only suspected Lacey of having a drinking problem, but also seemed to not be very tolerant of it. And though he was technically not wrong in his suspicions Belle resented his assumption and was in no mood to entertain his petty power trip, delicious accent or not.

“You’re more than welcome to step into Jefferson’s cocktail bondage fantasy dress and strut around in it if you have a problem with how I do it.” She turned to look at the designer, scrunching up her nose and trying to look apologetic. “I’m not really feeling this one, Jeff, gonna pass on it. Maybe Ashley could do it?”

Jefferson made a dismissing gesture.

“Don’t worry, Lace, I agree with you. Does not suit you at all. I think I’m gonna scrap it altogether. I’m shooting for intimacy for this collection but I think I’m going to go a different way with it.”

She smiled, relieved, and continued to flat out ignore the other man in the room, feeling nothing but satisfaction when it became clear that it seemed to piss him off.

“You’re a darling. Anything else you want me to try while I’m here?”

“Bless you, but no. I’ve imposed upon you enough. I’ve many ideas fluttering around my head after seeing all the looks, so expect some fresh new outfits in a few days. Right now I need to put pencil to paper. You’re free to go.”

Belle did not need to be told twice, turning around with as much grace as she could muster and slinking out of the room without even a glance towards the Scotsman still looking at her, his eyes hard and judging.

“What is this about some new sketches? Are you finally inspired?”

Gold had tried striking a delicate balance between letting Jefferson know how urgently the fashion house needed a new collection for the fall show and trying to keep the designer stress-free so he could work in peace. For weeks he had dragged his feet when it came to new designs, bemoaning the idea that he was expected to simply “have another vision”. Now it seemed Jeff was finally past his artistic temper tantrum.

“It’s all Lacey. She’s come back like such a breath of fresh air. There’s something… different about her. She’s as luminous as ever, but whereas before she commanded the attention of the room she now seems… lost in her own world. I’ve found that novelty quite inspiring.”

Gold grunted, unwilling to do or say anything that would upset Jefferson now that he seemed ready to be productive. And he did not entirely disagree with him. There was something… odd, about Miss French. That smile she had given him… He had never seen her look like that before.

“It’s like our Chesire Cat has turned into a Little Rabbit. Curiouser and curiouser. I’m thinking… soft. See-through, gauzy fabrics in soft shades of gold, like sunlight, and pale rose. Something fantasy-inspired, as if catching sight of a sprite deep into the woods, the intimacy of stepping into someone’s fantasy world.”

A picture began to form as the designer described his new vision, something that Gold could not deny seemed more than appealing.

“Let me see those sketches once you’re done, Jeff. I might want to tweak one or two.”

“Can do, boss.”

#The Changeling #rumbelle #rumbelle fic #thestraggletag fanfiction

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