"What can I say I like an incredibly kind man who’s a little bit lame."
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the thing that makes phoenix make up his mind about going to watch kristoph's execution is edgeworth being like "i think that sounds like a terrible idea that will make you feel horrible and will provide zero benefits" like phoenix is gonna listen to EDGEWORTH about what's self flagellating or not. tch. [is fucked up about this sequence of event for like the next month]
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It’s Wednesday. You carry out your foolproof plan and wake up on the other side absolutely positive you’ll finally get to fuck the Phoenix Witch but instead of a beautiful woman you see this blinged out bird creature coming towards you on all fours. Wyd?
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"This is the character who was my sexual awakening. He un-aced me. Ironic for the Ace Attorney(tm)"
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It's a strange epiphany that lightning mcqueen is one of the biggest bottoms of the cars universe. He brings a phoenix Wright energy, where he's loud and cocky and never loses, and then goes home and gets fucked silly
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nobody is ready for my pathologic ace attorney au (crusading small-town lawyer artemy comes to the big city and immediately acquires weird little girl clara and five other kids while trying to help his prosecutor rival daniil, who is obviously going to be framed for murder by the kains and then be dragged into a redemption arc (‘this coat is valentino and if any of you so much as think of putting your sticky hands on it your father is paying’)) but everyone is even less ready for my ace attorney pathologic au (dr phoenix wright comes home after finishing his training to visit his mentor, mia fey, only to find her dead - while trying to solve her murder, he comes to realise that the corruption in the town runs far deeper than one murder, and when the town goes into plague lockdown, he, mia’s sister, and his ex-best friend miles (who seems to have changed in phoenix’s absence following the death of his father and mentorship under von karma) are fighting the faction interests of the townspeople more often than they’re finding cures)
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