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whosjunglejim4322 · 3 years

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SMUT, collegecrush!au, tattooed Johnny agenda, bff Jaehyun! And brief mentions of him being drunk, all the yearning, Johnny is whipped for you but you didn't hear that from me, he's got a big dick, brief dry humping, finger fucking and pussy eating bc....I'm a whore, sensual fucking cause he thinks ur precious teehee ngl I have a crush on this Johnny

A month ago, if someone would have told you that Johnny Seo would be watching The Matrix trilogy with you while sitting on your living room floor under a blanket that he'd brought to the routine occasion - you would have thought them to be crazy. Insane, even.

And not because Johnny is unpleasant to be around, quite the contrary. Despite his popularity he's one of the most levelheaded, endearing frat boys - for lack of better term - you've ever met, and you also happen to think of him as a superhero of sorts, always there the moment you need him.

It had been a party, where the two of you met - sort of. Not shocking, in the least bit, but also not the first place you would have planned to be on a Saturday night. Jaehyun, being the stubborn and puppy dog eyed best friend that he is, insisted that you come along with him - that he'd keep you glued to his side all night long.

Of course, in proper Jaehyun fashion, three tequila shots in and a game of beer pong had him barely cognitive and passed out on some ones bathroom floor within two hours. The house was big, but filled with people and between trying to lift him up while he giggled about your hair smelling so good and sweet - you also feared anyone seeing him like this. Even if it weren't the first time.

His presence spooked you, at first, a light tap on your shoulder from somewhere behind you just as you attempted to lift your aforementioned best friend for what felt like the hundredth time that night. You nearly dropped him back on his head, if it weren't for quick hands and a sturdy grip on the drunk boys slumped shoulders.

He looked like sunshine, honey skin and dyed blonde hair with the dark roots growing out - a soft, comforting smile across the smooth planes of his face. Dark ink peaked out from where the collar of his shirt had drooped, appearing to be spilling from his shoulder. Your arms felt weaker than before, and embarrassment regarding the situation began to make your skin hot.

"I got him, don't worry," he'd assured with a gentle grin, lifting your bestfriend with an ease you almost wanted to scowl at. His height had been startling too, and not just because you were sitting on someone's bathroom floor. "did you guys drive here?"

You shook your head, a sigh of frustration leaving your lips and slumping your posture as you remembered that you both had walked here. Johnny slung Jaehyuns arm over his broad pair of shoulders, and jerked his chin towards the door, which you opened warily.

"I'll drive you home, it's no problem," his voice was soft, reassuring and you were taken aback. He obviously knew Jaehyun, and you'd never met any of his friends that were so...pleasant. "let's get him to my car first."

It wasn't nearly as painful and humiliating to push past crowds of intoxicated people with Johnny leading the way, as it would have been if it were just you. No one even batted an eye at the way he was dragging Jaehyun like a ragdoll, while the boy grumbled under his breath like a child.

People looked at him, of course. Oh, they looked at him. But not because of his human luggage, and it felt odd to see so many eyes on one person, to realize that his presence has the same effect on everyone else as it did you.

He kept looking back, making sure you were still close behind him, and it wasn't until you were outside in the open that you realized he'd been clinging on to the fabric of your jacket, making sure you didn't stray. Your heart felt like it was bursting open. Focus. You'd thought to yourself.

"That's my car over there, can you open the door for me?"

You jogged towards the sleek, onyx colored SUV that looked like a shadow against the dark bushes, and in just a split second Johnny was behind you, maneuvering Jaehyun into the backseat.

"Mmm...leather." Your best friend's giggle made you all the more grateful for the fact that you hadn't had to do this alone, his cheeks bright red and eyes crescent moons from the way he gleefully grinned. Still, you love him nonetheless.

You pulled your jacket off and prepared to drape it over his body before Johnny stopped you with a gentle hand, shaking his head. "I've got two on, let me."

His jacket probably sufficed more anyways, a heavy denim that would actually cover most of Jaehyuns body. You thanked him with a shy smile while he closed the door, and headed towards the passengers seat.

This experience had been the beginning, the car ride home that night being one full of conversations - genuine conversations, and he didn't leave once you both arrived at your apartments. Jaehyun snored in the background while the two of you talked, laughed. It was hard to look him in the eyes, to not make it so obvious - it's hard now, too.

Neo and Trinity kiss on the screen in front of you, and you wonder how Johnny sees you. Sure, he's flirty, overtly sometimes, but there's never been a definitive line to mark where the both of you really are on the friendship spectrum. If you even want to call it that.

Every time he touches your cheek or catches you staring, even when you're walking to your classes and his hand graces the small of your waist just before he waves you goodbye - you have to assume that he knows what he's doing - that the tension hasn't ever just been one sided.

His hair is a light chestnut brown now, longer than usual and flopping into his eyes from the sides. It's unfair, how he doesn't even have to try. The sharp slope of his nose, the bow of his lips, even the elegance of his neck and jaw. That awe from when you first saw him, has never left.

Not to mention that you often times forget he has so many tattoos whenever he decides to wear short sleeves, the art inky and stark against his olive skin - riveting down from his biceps like silk, cascading over his thick forearms and ending at his knuckles.

You turn your attention back to the laptop upon realizing that you've gotten caught up, heart still rattling underneath your ribcage. It makes it worse, the fact that the heat of his body is so close, that you can smell the scent of dryer sheets clinging onto the fabric of his shirt along with the natural allure of his skin.

"Why were you staring at me?" His breath is warm against the shell of your ear and you shudder, surprised by his sudden closeness and the timbre of his voice. You turn to face him with an incredulous expression, feigning innocence - but he makes it damn near impossible with the way he's looking at you - a dark eyebrow raised and a sly smile playing on his heart shaped lips.

"I was looking at your tattoos, cause - uhm, I forget they're underneath your clothes sometimes." You confess, and his knee knocks against yours underneath the blanket.

"Mmhm, so you think about what's under my clothes?" He teases, and takes pride in the way your eyes glower at him, a scoff leaving your mouth. It's hard to be annoyed when he's so vibrant, right here in front of you.

"Just the art, this one's my favorite." Eager to not have the pressure on you anymore, you reach out to grasp his wrist - not realizing how deeply of a need you've had all this time to do so, until you're tracing the flower that's decorating the top of his hand.

In hindsight, it's a bold move - but you can't go back now, not when he's staring down at you so fondly, scooting closer and placing his hand in your lap while you admire his body art.

"Yeah? Why's it your favorite?" He asks, genuinely curious. He nudges your shoulder with his when he sees the shy smile spreading across your lips, your skin hot to the touch. His comfort level has you less nervous than you were before, and the whole thing feels oddly natural, being so close together.

"I don't know, it just suits you. Your hands are so big, and the little vines looping around your knuckles really makes them look...delicate."

You don't dare look up, not when you realize his chest is rising and falling faster than it was before, just like yours is as you spread his fingers out and play with the digits, his face just inches above yours, voice warm in your ear.

"Second favorite." It's not a demand but it's not exactly a request either, and there's a safety in the energy pulsating around you both - mutual, rippling like a current through your bones.

Your eyes deliberately trail up the length of his long arm, scanning, and your fingertips press against the belly of the dragon that wraps around his bicep, sinewy tail tapering off just below his elbow. You've secretly admired this one for a long time, sneaking glances whenever you can. He turns more towards you just the slightest bit, and the closeness begins to make you feel dizzy.

"Your hands are soft."

This time, you can't not look at him, belly filled with a need to see his face, to save the memory of his features so up close in the back of your mind. However, once you do, look up at him - you almost wonder how you'll be able to handle it at all, his amber eyes boring into you as if he's trying to read your thoughts.

"So is your skin." Is what you manage to reply, willing yourself not to look at his soft, inviting mouth - afraid you'll give yourself away. You feel something stroke the side of your cheek and it takes you a second before realizing he's touching you, apparently giving yourself away isn't an issue. You feel like you're being set ablaze.

"Is it really just the tattoos, you think of?" You're not imagining things, he's definitely moving closer - you can smell the starbursts that he ate earlier still sweet on his breath, the wrappers crumpled on the coffee table next to the laptop.

It's all settling in, the realization that this hasn't been just you, fantasizing and daydreaming about someone who hasn't even realized how his natural charm has made you feel.

You're afraid to speak, so you shake your head as a response to his question, the atmosphere thickening impossibly now that he's cupping your chin between his fingers, the tips of your noses almost touching. You've placed your palm against his knee without even realizing it, steadying yourself.

"I've wanted to kiss you since the day we met," he confesses, dark eyebrows furrowed as if he's restraining himself, waiting. "is this...is this okay?" Your lower belly flutters, and you're almost afraid to move, to change anything about this moment and the way it is right now.

"Me too. I've wanted to kiss you, I mean." You breathe out, and now your lips are ghosting against each other, a moment of hesitation that feels both infinitesimal and fleeting. "It's more than okay." A heartbeat passes and he presses his mouth against yours, so pillowy soft that you gasp, surprised.

It's just a second, that he pulls away to look down at you, and your expression is so heavenly - so hazy and delicate. He kisses you again and this time your lips begin to overlap, from top to bottom, suckling and getting used to the feel of each other. He's still holding your face, but with both hands now, thumbs on your cheeks and fingers wrapping around to the nape of your neck.

You cling onto him like you've no other choice, desperate to have him underneath your fingertips, reminding you that this is really happening and that your mind isn't just creating very vivid daydreams. He pulls you closer and you grip onto his broad shoulders.

"Mm, you're so sweet," he lilts between his kisses, tone somewhere between bliss and desire. You're not expecting to be so worked up already. "even better than I imagined." His tongue slips past yours, wet and warm and it's like your body is being put on vibrate.

He senses this too, with the way you're almost in his lap, breath unsteady. His arms are around your waist before you can move any further, pulling you on top of him and locking you to his torso.

"Johnny." You strain, as the feeling within you becomes overwhelming, craving his touch, his mouth. It doesn't help that he's being so vocal, as well - the sounds sweeter, and more desperate than you'd expect from him. It has something feral igniting within you.

What shocks you the most is that he's already hard underneath you, and the thought alone is enough to have you keening further against his chest, tightening your thighs' grip around his trim waist- not to mention you can feel him snug against your ass, material of your shorts so thin it's palpable when he twitches.

So, naturally, your whine is petulant when his mouth departs from yours, his plush lips a deep blush, matching his cheeks in their hue. He's just as worked up as you if his erratic breathing and the way that he grasps onto your sides is anything to go by, and you shouldn't be as surprised as you are about it.

"You...have no idea," he pants, smoothing his thumb over your bottom lip. "how badly I've wanted you. In so many ways."

Your heart feels like it's attempting to burst through your chest in an effort to be closer to him, his sharp eyes lowly lidded but fierce in their honesty. You take this brief moment to touch his face, his soft cheeks and the smooth, taut ridge of his jaw. It all feels too real to be a dream. This must be reality.

"I'm only stopping because, well I like you," it's hard to pinpoint if the trembling of his hands is fueled from his desire or his nerves, but either way he's got your rapt attention. You doubt anyone could look away from those eyes.

"I like you a lot and...fuck, I don't want to do anything you aren't comfortable with or...sure about. Because I'm sure about you." He finishes, sincere and stoic while holding you against him. You feel like you're floating.

"I have a really big crush on you, Johnny," you kiss his mouth and he smiles against it, humming in contentment. Suddenly, your nerves are replaced by pure adrenaline. "and I like you a lot, too." When you pull back from his lips with a soft smack, his expression causes your skin to burn hot.

"So it'd be okay if I did..." he tilts your head to the side, and a flurry of goosebumps descend across your skin, his breath warm against your throat. "this?" A kiss, soft but purposeful, is placed there, and you shudder.

All you can do is nod in affirmation, heartbeat in your ears among other places. Your fingers run through the hair at the nape of his neck while his mouth begins placing warm, wet pecks against yours, and his body lurches when your thighs tighten around his torso.

It only manages to work you up further, of course, brain already high off of the fact that Johnny likes you back...in fact...he truly is as good as you've always thought, sweet and kind and nasty, groaning when you rut your hips against him.

"Baby, you're shaking." He mouths against your jaw, wondrously and laced with an undertone of hunger. His strong arms hold you tight, eyes softening when he looks down at you and realizes just how worked up you really are.

"I just want you really bad, Johnny." Your body emphasizes your point, chest pressed against the firmness of his, nipples hard behind your shirt. He can practically feel you throbbing.

It's a little fucked up, honestly.

No ones ever had him this head over heels, he feels himself melting against you, your voice sweet and syrupy, dripping with this ache just for him and he's losing it.

"Yeah?" He muses, the wide palm of his hands sliding down the curve of your back, and over the swell of your ass where it's planted so firmly atop of him - massaging you there. "Where do you want me, honey?"

The pet names have you too worked up, you really could get off of anything right now and he's tracing the back of your thighs now, swirling his soft fingertips around, leaving a wake of searing heat in their path.

"Want you everywhere, just - mmph." This kiss interrupts you, bruising in it's intensity and he cups your face softly as a silent apology despite the fact that you're letting out small coos of satisfaction, tugging at the ends of his messy hair.

For a second you feel like you're being lifted, not realizing he's just moved you both to the couch until your head is resting against the cushions, inky arms caging your body against the length of his. He groans when you palm at his stomach, touching and rubbing his sides and then the broad of his back.

All the while his free hand, the one that's not attached to the arm holding himself up, does some exploring of its own, palming your breasts through your shirt and squeezing with just enough pressure to have you arching into his touch.

Automatically, your legs wrap around his middle and your heels dig into the dimples of his back, and his hips pivot downwards to nestle right in between yours. You're both instantaneously struck by the sensation of your centers meeting, his length jerking inside of his pants, your clit throbbing in yours.

"Gonna touch you..." nimble fingertips dance over the skin of your inner thighs. "...here, is that okay?" The warmth of his hand cups your sex and now you're positive that wetness has begun to soak through your underwear, senses gone haywire from the way he's rubbing you, up and down.

"Mhm that's - yes, that's okay." You pant, desperate to feel him as well and reaching in between your bodies in an attempt to grasp at him - his height doesn't make this as easy as you thought and your pliant hands meet just his navel, the faintest of happy trails soft against the skin here.

He switches to his thumb now, instead of the heel of his palm to rub you through your shorts. He searches, for a short moment, finding what he's looking for and pressing the pad of his finger against your bud.

He kisses your whimper, shifting his hips and shuffling upwards just a smidge so that your hands can reach his hard cock. You have to maneuver your arm underneath his but it's working out fine so far, your eyes widening once you feel the twitch of his length.

"Oh." You gasp, expecting to have felt it all while you were on his lap, but missing by a longshot. He's big, bigger than anticipated and you're a bit too flustered as you follow it's bulge through his sweats. He groans your name, and you might be short circuiting.

"You're so hard...and b-big, Johnny you're really big." The incredulity of your voice only has his hunger growing, threatening to swallow him whole. In one breath your hands are pulled from him, pinned above your head with his gentle fingers barring your wrists.

"You're so fuckin' cute," he professes with an awed lilt, moving his hips in circles between yours - his shaft, heavy and thick, nudged against your lips. "wanna make you feel good...mm, wanna make you cum."

Butterflies threaten to flutter into your throat and suffocate you, his breath warm and sweet against your cheek before he's nipping at your earlobe. You feel like you're high, spinning yet completely grounded by his weight above you, against you.

"I want you Johnny, want you to fuck me." You try to turn your head, bashful of the way you're being so shameless but he's not having it, keeping his gaze on your every expression, trying not to lose his sanity when you grind yourself against him. Your voice, petulant and needy, is enough to have him at his wits end alone.

"I will baby, I will," he promises sweetly, accentuating his point by letting go of your wrists, and using one of his hands to pry your thighs open. He rolls his agile hips against you and the friction has you reaching out to grasp at his waist - trim and firm underneath your fingertips. "just gotta get you ready first."

He sits back on his haunches and you pout about the lack of content, his pleased grin a beacon as he hooks his fingers into your waistband, pulling your shorts off your hips and past your thighs - till they're at your ankles, and it feels surreal when he throws them somewhere behind the couch, too eager for his own good.

You're brought back to current reality when his big hands caress the tops of your thighs, before creeping down into the soft crease where they're shut closed in embarrassment, and pulling them apart.

He outwardly marvels and you wonder if he can see you clench, the moment overwhelmingly intimate with the way he's staring directly at the wet spot that’s soaked through the crotch of your panties. He takes only a moment to reach out and press his thumb against the dampness, balls tightening with the need to release each time you whimper or gasp.

With his cock leaking in his pants, he wastes no time, taking the flimsy piece of fabric off so fast you don't even have time to by shy about him seeing you naked and glistening in front of him. Furthermore, you don't think anyone could feel even the least but bad about themselves if he looked at them like this - slack jawed, and starved.

"Fuck...you're so beautiful," two long, inky fingers formed into the shape of a V, spread your lips open and then he's moving further away - no, scooting down onto his stomach, and suddenly his breath is a warm puff against your most sensitive parts. "so wet for me, hmm?"

You're not sure you can look away, too enraptured by the visual stimuli that's correlating with the circling of your swollen clit. You want to cry, a little bit. Scream, maybe. He's so beautiful you can't help but to reach out, running your fingers through the front of his chestnut hair and then his eyes are piercing through you like the shock of ice water.

Your body seems to register the feeling before you can process the sight by itself, back bowing off the couch, hips bucking. His hot, wet tongue licks at the hood of your clit, starting slow and picking up pace when you start to squirm. The blossoms painted across his skin decorate the arms that hold you down while his pillowy lips envelop the bud, suckling lewdly.

"O-oh, oh fu-mmm." You're already blubbering, lost and falling into the sensation of everything all at once. You've no doubt that he's had years of experience but this, you're not sure you've felt pleasure like this before.

"Feels good?" He mumbles between the flick of his tongue, hands traveling up the length of your body to grip your waist, kneading your skin. You almost laugh at the question, assuming your trembling body and the way you're involuntarily bucking against his mouth would suffice as an answer. Still, you humour him.

"Mmhm, feels- ohh, mhm feels good." Your voice is barely there, strained and whiny but he feeds off of your every utterance as if it's something he so desperately needs. The smacking between your legs becomes louder and like a magnet, you're drawn to the sight again, coil in your belly tightening impossibly.

He's a muss of hair, the dark strands tickling your thighs when his head moves from side to side. Your thighs attempt to clamp shut but then he's looking up at you again - purposeful in the way he maintains eye contact while he dives down and licks a stripe over your entrance.

You're not going to last long, and he knows this, from every twitch and squirm and whimper - he's preparing for your demise, humming in contentment while the lewd sounds of slickness continue.

He slips a finger inside of you, and then another once he realizes how soaked you are, and this proves to be the beginning of the end. You grip onto his forearms, needing to be grounded to something while he buries the digits inside of you, curling in a come hither motion.

It's all beyond what you thought pleasure could be, it's violet and red and all things euphoric behind your eyelids and the sound of his pleased groans are what finally have you giving out, melting against the couch cushions.

You're not sure if you're making any sound at all, honestly. It comes so quick, violent in it's force and you're hazy headed - tears welling in your eyes from the way he's still massaging you, licking you while your walls squeeze and contract around his fingers.

"That's it baby, mmm, let go."

The velvet voice is warm against your sensitive sex and you're still twitching as you peel your eyes open to peer down between your legs and see him there, staring up at you like you're the sun, slowing his movements while the aftershock of your orgasm seeps through you.

His knuckles are buried to the hilt inside of you and he pulls them out slowly, petal pink lips kissing your clit gently, adoringly. With your brain still foggy and embarrassment no longer present, you grab his wrist, bringing his slick soaked fingers to your mouth and wrapping your lips around them.

He moans an expletive and then he's hovering over you again, watching with a soaring heart as you suckle your juices clean from his digits, lashes fluttering when you open your eyes.

For once in his life, he's speechless. You have to pull him down to kiss you in order to breaks him from his reverie and it's now that he's realizing how excruciatingly hard he is. He doesn't remember the last time he's ever been this worked up without his dick even being touched for more than five minutes.

It's safe to say he's taken by surprise when your hand slips into his bottoms and briefs to palm him this time, and his body lurches against you while a desperate sound bellows in his throat.

"Baby." he coos, relishing in the softness of your palm, the difference in size of his own. He wants to protest when the intense bliss of it is gone, momentarily, only to feel your fingers attempting to pull his sweats down.

You're still buzzing from your orgasm but you've never been more positive about something; about someone. Your whole body feels as though it can't be satiated, not until you have all of him after having such a sweet taste.

"Please, now, want you now." You nibble on his bottom lip and he has to pull himself away or else he'll get too caught up in your mouth by itself, but he's on a mission - searching for his wallet and scrambling for it when he sees the leather square sitting on the floor.

The tips of your fingers and toes tingle with a mixture of unbearable anticipation, and nerves for what's about to come when he pulls the condom from his wallet and tears the corner of the foil.

It's just a second but it's enough to admire him silently, the twitch of his mouth, the elegance of his fingers even when they're eager and uncoordinated. A part of you feels overcome by the need to be encapsulated by his presence, for his skin to be a permanent silkiness against your lips.

He catches you in the midst of staring and it's like he's glowing from the inside out, pulling his pants down his thick thighs along with his black briefs, kicking them to the floor.

Without thinking your arms are reaching forward, gripping the small of his waist as if to still him, and he pauses at your will. He's cupping your chin with one hand while your fingertips explore underneath the hem of his shirt, and you're grateful that he's allowing you to soak this in, that he's not rushing despite the fact that both of you are like exposed lit wires.

"Here, let me take it off." His arms are reaching behind him before you can blink, biceps curling as he pulls his shirt off of his broad shoulders before discarding it with the rest of his clothing.

Your breath is audible, pupils blown wide while you examine the length of his torso and the permanent shapes that are marked there. Only patches of his honey skin peek through the array of tattoos he's got climbing his sides, over his chest, and you swear you've never seen someone so beautiful.

"Take mine off too." You barely manage to get out, and he's kissing your lips again with a soft sort of fondness, while his knuckles graze your skin and your shirt is being stripped from your body. He's back to kissing you and your naked chests meet for the first time, a fierceness gripping you by the throat when when when the shaft of his cock nudges your clit.

"You're sure about this?" He asks, gentle in the way he strokes your cheek with the back of his hand, pecking your mouth between glances at your nipples where they rub against him. His touch travels to your jaw and down your neck, before he's tweaking the buds between his fingers, and your legs wrap around his middle in an effort to solidify your answer.

"Yes, I'm sure," you run your fingers through his hair. "very sure."

Lips press against your cheek and then you're presented with the sight of him again, bare in front of you, just a few inches away. It's now that you really find the courage to look at him, not expecting to be out of breath and shock stricken once you lay your eyes upon his dick.

It's pretty, as pretty as you knew it had to be; curved just slightly, the tip swollen with arousal and a shade deeper than that of his lips that you've come to have photographically memorized.

You watch with probably more fascination than most while his slim fingers roll the condom onto his length, down the shaft that protrudes with a small vein right in the middle, until it's snug and securing the fact that you and Johnny Seo are about to have sex.

As always, here there right when you need him most, aiding you in forgetting about anything that isn't crucial to right now. His arms are wrapping around your thighs and pulling you closer - your small gasp doesn't go unnoticed.

And then, there's also the way he's looking at you, again. It's like he's compacted every emotion you could feel in a moment like this, and somehow managed to reflect it's opacity back at you through the glimmer of his irises.

You jerk your hips against him and he grins at your urgency, diverting his attention to the space between your legs and holding you steady by the hips with one hand while the other goes to grip his cock.

He levels his pelvis with yours and brings the pink head down to your entrance where it leaks for him, gathering the slickness and smearing it through your folds, around your clit.

His fingers search for yours and suddenly he's interlocking them while you feel the initial stretch of his dick finally entering you, a soft expletive leaving his mouth while he pushes himself into you halfway, peering down with half lidded eyes as a silent affirmation.

Your expression must be as expressive as the soft mewls that involuntarily fall from your lips, and he bottoms out while leaning down to kiss you as he's come to realize that this action is single handedly way more addictive than it should be.

You feel so full it's impossible not whine, and within seconds he's pulling himself out of you nearly all the way - mouth hovering over yours so he can watch your features contort when he sheathes himself back in with a snap of his hips.

With the need to hold on to something becoming incessant, he allows you to throw your arms around his neck while your thighs tremble around him, his hips creating a slow but steady pace that draws lewd sounds from between your bodies with every slow drag of his thick cock.

It's strange, how you provoke such tenderness within him when you shudder and pant beneath him despite the fact that he's barely done anything yet- a juxtaposition to the feral, nagging type of ache that brews in the center of his belly to have you even more a mess.

It's not that he's fairing any better, though. Even you can see that, feel it in the way he keeps his lips on your skin, trying and failing miserably to hold back his groans while your nails create crescent moons on the broad of his back.

"You - f-fuck you feel s-so good." He stutters, and if you could find your words maybe you'd even have the confidence to tease him, but right now all you can comprehend is the feeling in which he's providing, the nudge of his tip so deep inside of you.

"Faster, can you - oh yes, yes." It's like he knows what you want before you get it out all the way, and his tongue is warm against your throat while he obliges your request, furthering your haziness.

You're quick to realize that Johnny is a generous lover. Despite the fact that he's holding himself together on the edge of his coherency, he's already atuned to each tense of your muscles, the strain of sweet sounds you coo in his ear. He uses this as a guide, working his hips skillfully, circling when he pushes himself back in.

The fact that you're sopping wet helps as well, audibly soaked and your walls are taking him in so generously he doesn't know what to do with himself. Your hands are in his hair and tug at the dark strands without thinking, drawing a sweet, serene moan from the back of his throat.

"Mm, feels good?" He asks despite knowing the answer, your countenance painted with the colors of bliss. He peers down in between your bodies and almost regrets it due to the pulse it sends through his groin - threatening to send him over the edge too soon.

But it's a sight too mesmerizing, his entire length disappearing inside of you with an easy glide, his hips colliding with the back of your thighs and your clit waiting to be played with. You're just as taken by the sight, surrounded by only him, inside of you and around you like a life force. Your hands travel over anywhere and everywhere, down to his belly where the muscles flex underneath the painted skin with every thrust.

"So good, you feel s-so good Johnny." You're becoming even more petulant but he doesn't mind, not when you're clinging onto his biceps and mewling his name. He slips his tongue into your mouth while his hands cup the back of your knees, hiking your thighs up higher around his middle.

Your skin burns where he touches, his pace increasing and now you wouldn't be surprised if the neighbors knew exactly what it is that the two of you are doing, skin against skin and coos of pleasure echoing through your small apartment. You have a hard time forming thoughts that make sense.

"M' all the way up there baby," his voice is deceivingly sweet, hips dangerous and borderline ruthless now that you two are drenched in the essence of lust and desire, driven by your need to come undone. "such a sweet pussy."

He means it, too. Maybe that's what makes this all so much more enthralling. From the clench of his taut jaw, to the way his dark eyebrows are furrowed, even the crimson of his lips from the way he's been biting down on them - Johnny is nothing but honest. It's somehow stripped you of the shyness you'd normally be harboring, compelling your mouth to speak without a filter.

"It's all yours, I'm yours."

This seems to spur him on, more than you thought because now he's all but cradling you in his arms, mouthing his words against your lips, not allowing even a centimeter of space to reside between the two of your bodies. It feels whole, complete.

"Mm, yeah sweetheart? Mine. Fuck, you're all mine."

It's a growled statement and you quiver against his solid form, warmed from the inside out like a furnace and set ablaze. You're still sensitive from his mouth but that doesn't change the orb of pressure within your belly, or the waves of pleasure that spread through your thighs and up your spine from the way your clit is rubbing against his pelvis while his cock reaches new depths.

You should've known his mouth would be filthy, and it's really ticking every box you've literally ever needed to be ticked and you're sort of embarrassed by how far gone you are already, properly mewling with your fingers gripping onto his bulged biceps where he uses them to hold himself up.

His face is a sight to behold in itself, as well - plush lips parted, cheeks hot and a shade of deep, ravishing plum. If he weren't steadily hitting that sweet spot inside of you maybe you'd actually be able to keep your eyes open long enough to admire it more - but it's obvious it won't be long until you're unraveling.

He's thankful, in a way. Because you're sighing out sweet words that profess how good he's doing, and he swears that he's never felt anything as good as this. Through and through. You're made for him, wrapped around his being, tight like cellophane and it's silly but this is all he's dreamed of for months.

"Open your eyes sweetheart," his hips stutter at the same time you involuntarily squeeze around the tip of his cock as he goes to seep back into you and you're drawn to the plead of his voice. "let me - fuck, let me be yours, please?"

His voice is honey, coating you in it's sweetness and you're teetering on the edge of your release. It beckons you soothingly, like a siren in the wake of a wave and it doesn't calm when you pull him down to your mouth by the nape of his neck, your shared groans being swallowed by the other. Your thighs are a vice around his waist, keeping him locked against you as he grinds his cock into you.

"You're mine, J-John- oh, oh please." His fingers have reached down in the limited space between your shared skin to rub your clit in circles and you know this is it - mind and body completely encircled by everything he's made of, the scent of his skin and the heat of his body and even the way he says your name.

"Want you to cum for me, please, please cum for me baby." His breath is warm against your ear, a vibration that wracks through all of your senses and your body knows it's coming before you do - instantly under the influence of his begs and pleas.

You're descending, voice nothing but a gasp and an echo of an expletive when the dam inside of you finally bursts - leaving you to tremble like a leaf beneath him while the feeling threatens to consume you inch by inch, nerve by nerve.

You've all but gone limp, bright dots of light flitting through your vision and you feel his mouth everywhere, like a soft, warm reassurance that he's not going anywhere while you spasm around him.

"Just like that, oh fuck, yeah just like that."

In this place of completeness, you bask in the rise in octave of his usually low timbred voice, in the way he's holding you so firmly in his arms, as if scared to let go and put even an inch of separation between the two of you.

You're still twitching when you feel him throb inside of you, your name a warm whisper against the side of your neck while he pumps himself into you with no real rhythm; filling the condom with spurts of his cum while your fingers gently scratch the back of his scalp, through his hair.

Your breaths are ragged and have only that in common, his weight comforting despite the fact that both of you are in such a fragile state. It all feels surreal, like maybe you’ll wake up soon even with his cock still buried inside of you, half hard. More than anything, it feels right. Apprehension nor guilt nor worry brews underneath your skin, instead overshadowed by pure elation.

Wet pecks travel across your throat like marks of gratitude and your smile is automatic, involuntary.

"I meant it, you know," he's out of breath but concise, palm cupping the side of your face as he makes his way to your mouth and kisses you there, afraid to look you in the eyes. "about...about what I want. About wanting you."

You actually do laugh this time, suddenly outrageously giddy at the words leaving his pretty mouth, mildly entertained by the fact that someone could be almost as oblivious as you are. Almost.

He looks worried for only a split second until you're kissing his face, over his nose and fuchsia cheeks, a feather against the soft autumn ground.

"I meant it too," your voice is light, airy and he swears he'd believe anything you told him, even if it weren't as absolutely resolute as it is right now; your smile against his lips like a seal of promise. He meets your gaze, and everything within him calms, settles.

"I'm yours. And you're mine."

This, he thinks to himself, is all he's wanted to hear since the day you looked up at him with all the stars in your eyes.

Completely worth Jaehyun stealing his Armani denim jacket, honestly.

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mejomonster · 2 years

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List of cdramas that are gayer than they strictly needed to be, in a good way (by that i mean if you watch with a queer lens there’s a lot of fun to be had):

Once Upon a Time on Lingjian Mountain - the bi reading of both the main guy and main girl seem fully intentional by the writing, though only the guy/girl pairing is endgame in the second half. What results is a fully fleshed out bl story for the first arc, while the main girl has a flirtatious relationship with her girl friend, then later people get other crushes. What results is a show very welcoming to bi interpretation since at LEAST 3 characters are written that way on purpose, and you could ‘optimistically’ interpret a lot more of them as not-straight. I give this show some extra credit cause the main guy is near-explicitly depicted as bi (I don’t think he ever self labels though the way characters in Love and Redemption and Bureau of Transformers do).

Eternal Love - (I know, shocking, the drama I’m mixed on lol!) At the LEAST this show has 2 gay characters (phoenix guy and his fox boyfriend), and 2 bi characters (Demon Prince and Demon Princess). So there’s plenty to interpret as queer if you go looking - that stuff is just the surface level confirmed stuff. If you also wanted to read more people as not-straight there’s plenty of room to. While this show isn’t my favorite for some things, it is definitely very welcoming of queer readings and easily put those interpretations into itself in a nice way. I appreciate how many queer-readable characters are in this show, intentionally, especially when it was not the point of the story and they could have just as easily not been included

Ancient Detective - I have only watched a few episodes so I don’t know how explicitly queer anyone is confirmed in the long term. But in the very short term it sets up what’s pretty easily interpretable as the main guys liking each other, and our main detective also being bi. So its pretty open to queer interpretation and seems written in a way that clicks with that

Secret of The Three Kingdoms - (shocking because it has 2 very strong guy/girl romances but it Does make the list!) the show is not shy about implying often that Sima Yi and Liu Ping could be boyfriends/read as boyfriends. Multiple employees for Sima Yi assume it, strangers on the street assume it and tell them off for being so romantic and mushy outside like this. While I read it as a bromance, there’s definitely an easy angle to interpret it differently and the show is fully aware and pushing it. Also Elvis Han screams bi energy when he plays Sima Yi. We’ve also got Tan Jianci’s character who’s got insane chemistry with both the empress and fake-emperor making easy bi reading and shipping, Guo Jia ALSO has insane chemistry with everyone including fake-emperor, and then personally I’d like to ship the empress and princess-assassin even though the show doesn’t explicitly Push that queer reading like it does the Sima Yi/Liu Ping angle. Basically - regardless of how you interpret the characters, the universe they’re written in Clearly assumes same gender relationships exist, which is nice.

LORD Critical World* - I would list this in the category below, but its so Fantastical-Silly i don’t think they had a serious queer themes goal in mind the way the dramas i listed below Definitely do. So like? LORD Critical World is mega gay, its easily as gay as Xena Warrior Princess. But like... it has no gay rights agenda the way I think the dramas in the section below do, so I’m putting it here (at least as far as I’ve watched up to ep 20). So the two guy leads are basically soul married, writing explicitly confirms they’re sexually attracted to each other - so the lead Lord Silver is definitely into men, and our lead Qiling is definitely bi, that’s explicitly established. Then there’s the support cast - they all SCREAM bi energy, the girl Qiling likes probably likes a girl she’s rivals with, the bdsm Princess has got her Own thing going on, Ji Chen’s character’s chemistry with Qiling is insane. So while I only saw 2 characters explicitly into the same gender so far, I’d bet at least 90% of the characters are, probably 100% of the main characters. VERY easy to interpret the relationships and characters in this show through a queer lens.

DMBJ Dramas - Wu Xie/Zhang Qiling is a monolith of a ship for a reason, their story is jam packed with action-romance tropes galore for starters. I haven’t consumed every dmbj material (because there’s a LOT) but its safe to say Wu Xie and Pangzi usually are written as fairly bi (Pangzi’s flirted with guys and girls, Wu Xie’s definitely flirted with guys and in the novels mentions girls that i’ve seen), they’ve had scenes cut from the shows for being Too-Explicitly gay (that are just direct novel scenes), Zhang Qiling is certainly Attached to Wu Xie emotionally, and Wu Xie seems to collect ‘characters’ in a vague enough way that if you wanted to interpret a decent amount of characters as attracted to him (including the monsters) you could. And since a lot of dmbj characters are men, that means a lot of not-straight interpretation real estate. Ulitmate Note also had a very shippy heihua agenda which seemed to payoff with how much I see about the ship now. This show is very easy to interpret most any character any way You personally read them, which is nice.

Granting You A Dreamlike Life - (YES funny enough). This show STARTS with a very bisexual depiction of Xu Xingchen and Luo Fusheng. It pulls out the romance trope stops, the holding in the arms and holding while riding on a motorbike, the saying i’d do whatever you asked, the picking you over the girl i’m pushed toward, the sharing a bed overnight trope. It’s basically a given to interpret Luo Fusheng as bi and super easy to interpret Xu Xingchen as also bi. While the other characters give less to work with as far as ‘purposely written that way’, I’d say the show is easy to interpret more characters as queer if you wanted just because its so willing to depict its main guy leads as bi.

Detective L - Ok so Luo Fei is definitely bi. His only ‘warm’ relationships are with his girl detective partner (his Watson of the story) and the forensics/mortician Ben Jieming. Not only are they his only warm relationships, but both are written in a vaguely romantic-trope vaguely ‘friends like family’ sort of way. So its very open ended on if you’d like to read anything as romance in this, or everything as platonic (which i appreciate). The guy/girl relationship is not written particularly More romantic than Luo Fei’s relationship with a guy, which is refreshing if you hate when guy/girl couples are pushed over being friends/family to each other First. Luo Fei is also designed as a character to be the eyecandy of the show, which is just nice - watching and knowing its a pretty man filling that role instead of a woman getting sexualized. Meanwhile Qin Jiao Man doesn’t particularly flirt with any women (but i didn’t finish the show), however her character design is VERY dapper butch and i appreciated it deeply. As a bi person watching, a dapper butch woman and a pretty eye-candy man being the leads was absolutely lovely. As a couple, they scream bi-for-bi energy, and the biggest ship in the fanfiction community for this show is Qi Jiao Man/Luo Fei/Ben Jie Ming extremely well written ot3 stuff. I highly recommend pretty much all fanfic the fans have written when you finish this show (if you like Sherlock but wanted more butch women, more bisexuals, and an ot3, then this show/fandom may be your jam).

The Heiress - actress Una You is here again and I’m starting to think she gets cast as the bi-butch kind of role a Lot (which is good for me as a watcher I suppose). The Heiress is like The King’s Affection kdrama - our girl lead has assumed the life of a man and goes to school, does politics, accomplishes stuff and people fall for her. The man who falls for her, falls for her assuming she is a man, accepting he likes men, then pursuing said crush. The show oddly felt a LOT like Love is More Than A Word to me, but with bi energy rather than gay (LIMTAW is an excellent bl drama to check out). In general you could interpret a lot of characters in this show as not-straight.

Love and Destiny - I only watched 20 episodes of this, but I appreciated they approach the mermaid characters as explicitly trans and had explicit discussions with the mermaid describing her transition, her identity, interacting with her love interest. This show and Bureau of Transformers are the only cdramas I’ve seen explicitly discuss being trans and gender identity. Since the writing clearly has intent, I imagine if you wanted to interpret other areas of the show with a queer lens, you could find things to work with. At the least, this show seemed to be written in an open minded way (like Eternal Love, though I can find less clearly-intended queer characters in this show compared to EL and LaR).

Two Souls in One - I don’t know if anyone will watch this, it had no english subs back when i watched it but i loved it a lot. There’s an explicitly bi main second love interest, there’s a lot of gender shennanigans because its a guy and girl twin sharing one body cause of ‘magic stuff’ that happens since one is in a coma. There’s a pretty clear gay subtext relationship going on between the guy twin and his guy roommate/best friend that includes a scene of said best friend singing a love song to him at a concert. The main girl is publicly pretending to be her twin brother and gets an acting job, so she acts love scenes for the ‘drama the actor is in’ with women, and later when people find out who she’s dating the media freaks out over ‘2 men’ dating. The show includes a character coming out to their mom and the mom supporting them. Its a mix of there being explicitly queer characters, some queer subtext readings put there purposefully, and some things you can just interpret as queer if you want to. Its an oddball and I’m still surprised when I watched it that it was made in China and not Taiwan, because it feels similar in some ways to Taiwan drama Bromance (which also has an explicitly bi lead guy).

Humans - not english subbed completely yet, people are still putting new subs out. While the BBC Humans adaptation is MUCH gayer (a lot of explicit wlw in that show), this show is presented in a way in that you can certainly read multiple characters as queer if you would like to. Although I’d argue its themes itself go into broad human rights issues more (much like Bureau of Transformer and Guardian) which is where this show shines most overtly. That said, this is probably the closest we will get to a Ma Tianyu bl - his character comes off as pretty bi in this, with the main emotional interactions being with a guy (and with his SotTK character in comparison being so solidly shipped with the empress before anyone else). I’d argue one of the robot sisters has Big Bi energy too, even though she’s not flirted with a woman yet (maybe its just cause she’s such a badass the way Faith Lehane, Villainelle, Qin Jiao Man are). Also her romance with a human is very much a metaphor for discriminated against relationship types (So like Bat Boy in Bureau of Transformers, her relationship is the queer relationship allegory). A Ma Tianyu bl amv for this show is what initially got me to watch it (that said its actually solid good sci fi in general).

Novoland Pearl Eclipse - I have NOT even seen this show yet, but based on mutual’s reactions too it and the memes I've seen, I’m guessing the main guy has some romantic-esque relationship with both the main girl and the second guy lead emperor/villain guy? And the main girl, I think, pretends to be a man for a while (which if its like Eternal Love could lead to some bi shenanigans). So I’d say if the whole main trio is coming off as bi, this show’s probably got some potential to be interpreted in a queer way.

Ashes of Love^ - I mention this show with one HUGE caveat. Do I think its interpretable through a queer lens? YES - the lead character should be interpreted as aromantic, one of her friends reads as bi (he also acted in LIMTAW), a girl asks to marry our lead character who people read as a girl, our lead character cares nothing about gender (and to me screams Nonbinary until people push gender role expectations ON to her). Basically there is a TON in the premise and lead character alone that reads as inherently queer. Likewise, plenty of side characters either ARE queer (girl who proposed marriage) or easily interpretable as such. The caveat: this show is AGRESSIVE about pushing heteronormativity, belittling anything queer, pushing traditional gender roles (people telling the lead character she MUST dress femininely and make sure people Interpret her as a woman, people implying women MUST act jealous, the phoenix prince insulting a woman for implying marriage between 2 women as an idea, implying our lead who’s depicted as aro MUST fall in love). And all that is only the first 12-ish episodes. I had to stop watching because I got so frustrated with how much the writing was putting down queer interpretations of the show - queer interpretations IT put in there itself! The show CHOSE to put in a woman liking a woman, a character who liked being identified as a man or woman, a lead who expressed she didn’t feel romance or want it! The show chose to write that! So it was a bit aggravating to see the show then insult such traits over and over. If this show ever got less insulting about it, let me know. But... yeah if you did want to watch with a queer interpretation in mind, wow is it There... its just the writing is hostile about the fact it Is. (Whereas pretty much Every other show on this list is very positive about a queer-possible reading, and at the least does not feel actively-hostile about it).

special mentions - the queer reading is fully intentional:

Love and Redemption - Sifeng says he’s bi explicitly, Xuanji is nonbinary, Qing Long and Bai She have something going on, Bai Lin is bi too (but he is evil ToT), any additional queer lens reading was probably happily made by the writer

Guardian - while Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan are definitely supposed to be romantic in this, there’s also ‘case of the week’ lesbians, no doubt the many human/dixingren romances are parallels to weilan which has something to say about forbidden romance/romances that get discriminated against, so i’d say in general if you read anything as queer in this it definitely works with the story

Bureau of Transformer - both leads are bi, one lead is nonbinary, so that part is explicit. The bat boy falls for a human and its very much treated as a relationship that people are prejudiced against a la interracial relationships and lgbt relationships and the discrimination those deal with, so the narrative clearly is purposely written with a queer interpretation in mind. So if you interpret any other case of the week plots or side characters with a queer interpretation the show probably intended it.

The Untamed - YES Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji is fully intentional. But also? this show was lovely for writing all relationship types with equal weight - brotherhood, friendship, familial - all are depicted as similarly important. This also means though in cases like Lan Xichen/Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue/Jin Guangyao and Jiang Cheng/Lan Xichen and Wen Qing/Jiang Yanli there is a LOT of open room to interpret strong/impactful relationships as romantic just as much as you interpret Jin Zixuan/Jiang Yanli as romantic, if you would like to. The show is very open to queer readings of the characters, and also to various kinds of relationship types.

Word of Honor - Wen Kexing/Zhou Zishu is intentional. But the show is ALSO written in a way where a lot more characters come off as queer if you want to interpret them that way - Qian Qiao/Xi Sang Gui, Xie Wang/jerkface-mcEvil, the Prince calling Zhou Zishu his soulmate, Zhou Zishu arguably loved that fellow sect member guy of his and grieved his death MAJOR, a lot of guys in Four Seasons Manor (especially the one disciple who runs into Wen Kexing and Zhou Zishu when they’re wearing the masks) arguably Loves Zhou Zishu. You could very easily interpret a lot of these characters as queer, and in many cases its already implied.

#rant #rec list

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carryonmywaywardcaptain · 3 years

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Imagine...finding out there’s fanfic written about you--and even Charlie ships you with Dean

CarryOnCap’s Masterlist

Warnings: Fluff? Crack? A dramatic fanfic within a fanfic that I got carried away with haha.

A/N: This is kind of ridiculous, but I had fun with it! Also, I’ve never actually seen GoT but it seemed like a reasonable reference from what I’ve heard about it.

“Hey, look who I found!” Sam’s voice echoed through the War Room.

Dean glanced at you from across the table in the library, sharing your surprised expression as you both pushed your chairs away and stood.

“‘Sup, bitches?” Charlie grinned, making her way up the steps toward you.

“Hey! We were expecting you guys to come in through the main door. We’ve been keeping an ear out.”

Charlie stepped into your outstretched arms and pulled you into a tight hug. “It was a spur of the moment decision, but I decided to stick around a day or two longer than planned! Sam said I could go ahead and park in the garage.”

She let go of you and turned to give Dean a hug too. He smiled softly with a look that was uniquely reserved for her, cradling the back of her head while she pressed her cheek against his.

“Good to see you, Charlie. You know you’re always welcome to stay as long as you want.”

An involuntary smile crept onto your face as you watched them. You couldn’t help the way your heart swelled at the low rumble in his voice when he said her name. There was an undeniable protectiveness in his tone when he spoke to her--the sister he’d never wanted, as he affectionately called her.

When you shifted your attention to her, you noticed she was watching you. Before you could decipher the knowing glint in her eye, she suddenly twisted out of his arms and glanced back and forth between you and Dean. She began swinging her arms awkwardly before opting to cross them over her chest.

“You okay?” Dean asked, furrowing his brow.

“Yeah! Of course...Totes chill...cooler than a pack of peppermints.” She bobbed her head and flashed a nervous smile, twisting her hair around her finger as she struggled to act nonchalant. “It’s just that I remembered something. A story I read a while back--completely random. Totally unrelated to anything--I mean, now I’m starting to ramble. Hah! So how’ve you guys been? Still saving the world from evil sons-of-bitches?”

“Uh, yeah…” Sam answered, scrunching his eyebrows together. “We stay busy.”

“So what’s on the agenda tonight?” you piped up, changing the subject.

You were hoping to avoid swapping monster stories for a night. Charlie typically assumed the role of introducing you to popular and noteworthy fandoms during her visits to the bunker and, even if the boys weren’t as vocal, the three of you appreciated her knowledge of all things geeky and nerdy.

“I was thinking Marvel. Y/N, you’re obviously well-versed in the MCU because of your obsession with Steve Rogers--and, you know, clearly you’ve got a thing for the strong, righteous, self-sacrificing hero type. Dean, you could stand to branch out from the Batman references and, Sam, you’ve got this whole Thor kind of vibe going on.”

While Sam and Dean began teasing each other and arguing over “Batman versus Thor,” you gaped at Charlie, wondering what she’d meant by her remark about you having a “type.” You couldn’t help feeling like she was trying to insinuate something, but you shrugged it off and decided maybe it was all in your head.

***

After getting Charlie settled into one of the extra bedrooms, the four of you settled into the Dean Cave and agreed to start with the first Captain America movie.

Last Christmas, you and Sam had teamed up to surprise Dean with a couch for the Dean Cave. He had originally only had two La-Z-boy recliners and you’d found him fast asleep in the stiff old chairs on more than one occasion. Dean had been over the moon about the extra seating and the three of you had rearranged the furniture so the recliners were angled toward the tv on either side of the couch.

“Dibs on this side of the couch!” Charlie said, diving toward the furthest end from the door.

Although it was subtle, you knew there was still something off about the way Charlie studied all of you. There was definitely something on her mind she was trying to keep hidden from all of you.

“You know, we should probably have some snacks,” you said slowly. “Charlie, you want to come help me grab some stuff from the kitchen?”

“But I’m already comfy in my spot.” She frowned, wiggling her hips to make a point of sinking deeper into the spot she’d claimed on the couch. “Why don’t you have Dean help you?”

When you narrowed your eyes suspiciously, Sam cleared his throat. “Dean, why don’t I help you grab some snacks while Y/N and Charlie...catch up, er, whatever…”

You heard the boys leave the room and waited until their footsteps faded down the hall before you started interrogating her.

“Alright, Charlie--what the hell is going on with you?”

“I don’t know what you're talking about,” she muttered, scrolling through her phone.

“Bull. We lie for a living and I know there’s something you’re not telling us. So spill.”

“Fine,” she sighed. “Okay, so remember the Supernatural books by Carver Edlund?”

“Yeah…”

“The series obviously kind of had a cult following when it was in print, right? Well ever since the unpublished works got uploaded, the following has really taken off. Every once in a while a new one still pops up and the fans love them. And you’re in them now too!”

“I’m...what?”

“I mean it’s just insane and totally got sucked into it too. It’s brought on this whole new wave of fanfiction--”

“What’s fanfiction?” you cut in, struggling to keep up.

“It’s fiction made by the fans about the series. Sometimes they put themselves in the stories and write about working cases and fighting monsters with you guys--”

“Why would anyone want to pretend to do this crap with their lives?”

She stared at you for a moment and frowned. “Because you guys are heroes. I mean, yeah, there’s the whole depressing side of monsters and death and trauma and world-ending apocalypses--but you guys save people. You go on these exciting adventures of good versus evil and a lot of times you win. You save people. The fans really look up to all of you.”

Your gaze fell to the floor as you let her words sink in, but she didn’t give you long before she was rambling again.

“But that’s not even the best part! Everyone ships different OTPs--” she paused, noticing your puzzled expression “--uh, one true pairing… So everyone has a favorite couple they think are soulmates and belong together. There’s stories about Sam with Eileen or Jess, Dean with different people--you get the gist. Sometimes they even make up characters or do these ‘reader inserts’ and imagine themselves with the boys or you but, hands down, everyone’s favorite couple they want to end up together is you and Dean.”

“...what?”

Your eyes grew wide. It was hard enough to wrap your mind around the fact that strangers who didn’t know you were a real person were reading about your life, but learning they imagined you in different relationships? You’d never admit it out loud, but had it bad for Dean. And hearing you weren’t the only one that wanted the two of you together...

“I’ve gone deep into the fic and I can’t believe I didn’t see it sooner!” Charlie shook you from your thoughts. “You and Dean are perfect for each other. For serious. I usually stick to the fluffy stuff because, you know, your entire life is kind of angsty and I don’t like to read about you guys being in pain or, like, dying...again. Although I definitely have to admit I kind of stumbled into some of the smutty stuff and, wow, that was something else.”

You opened your mouth to ask more questions, but she kept rolling.

“Right, you probably don’t know what that means either. Fluff is the cute stuff that gives us all feels, angst is kind of just what it sounds like, and smut is, well...the sexy stuff.”

“You mean people out there in the world write about me and Dean…”

“Going at it like an episode of Game of Thrones? Oh yeah,” she responded, unlocking her phone. “Here. Here’s an example.”

Swallowing audibly, you took a seat next to her on the couch as she extended her phone toward you. Gnawing your bottom lip, you began reading the words on the screen:

Y/N took a deep breath, holding it in briefly before she exhaled and began walking toward Dean’s room. Ever since they returned from the hunt, Dean had hidden himself away in his room--no doubt blaming himself for everything that had gone wrong.

When she arrived at his door, she raised her hand to knock. She hesitated, almost retreating at the thought of him turning her away, but she had to try. She had to get through to him somehow.

She rapped her knuckles on the raw umber barrier and opened the door of Room 11 before he could tell her to go away.

She spotted him leaning over the sink, staring at his reflection in the medicine cabinet on the wall. His jade eyes flickered to where she stood in the doorway, their reflection somewhat distorted by cracks that spiderwebbed from where he had struck the mirror.

Her heart seemed to drop into her stomach as she imagined him lashing out, knowing he punched the mirror because he hated the reflection staring back at him. Knowing he always carried the weight of the world on his shoulders when he didn’t need to.

Y/N carefully shut the door and locked it behind her--the click of the deadbolt deafening in the silence. Her eyes never left Dean, who refused to turn and face her. She inched toward him, closing the distance until she could reach out and touch him. Gently placing her hand on his shoulder, she guided him to turn away from the mirror. Still, he refused to meet her eyes.

“Dean…” she breathed, voice barely above a whisper as she cupped his face in her hands. “It’s not your fault.”

He squeezed his eyes closed, face contorting with grief and guilt. The ghosts of his past refused to let him go, but she was determined to make him believe that he was worthy, no matter the cost.

Curling a finger beneath his chin, she tilted his head up, waiting patiently for him to meet her gaze. When his dark green orbs finally met hers, she was surprised to see that they were full of longing and desire. They flickered to her lips, making her breath tremble under the intensity of his gaze. Time seemed to slow until it froze altogether.

Anticipation hung heavy in the air as they both struggled against their desire to maintain the friendship they’d always had and the desperate need to finally cross that line. To succumb to the magnetic pull that had always been evident between the two of them.

Dean swallowed thickly before suddenly rushing forward, crashing his lips to Y/N’s as he pulled her into a searing kiss. He wrapped his strong arms around her, trapping her to his chest, afraid it was all a dream and she would soon disappear. But she gladly melted into his embrace, feeling like she was finally returning home, to a place she’d spent her life searching for.

A moan slipped past her lips as he walked her backward, pressing her up against the wall. She gasped, feeling his--

“The snacks have arrived!”

You jumped in surprise, a small gasp of surprise escaping as the boys appeared with armloads of snacks. Confusion and worry painted Dean’s face as he surveyed your flustered expression. Between his scrutinizing gaze and the content you’d practically been caught reading, your cheeks grew warm.

“Did I miss something?” Dean asked.

“Nope,” you responded much too quickly.

Charlie’s phone had fallen into your lap and, when she began cackling, you whipped your head in her direction and flung the phone at her thigh. You grimaced and the two of you had your own silent conversation as the boys spread the food across the bar Dean had built on the far wall.

“I was just telling Y/N how pumped I am about seeing my favorite OTP tonight,” she giggled.

“Your...what?”

Dean’s arm brushed yours as he plopped down on the other side of you. The accidental contact sent a wave of chills over your skin, making you shudder. You could feel his eyes on you again, but you refused to look at him.

“Oh, I’m so going down with this ship,” Charlie whispered under her breath before continuing in a louder voice. “Nothing--nevermind! Don’t mind me, just thinking out loud...”

“It says here an OTP means...one true pairing?” Your eyes grew wide as you looked to where Sam was reading his phone from where he sat in one of the recliners. “So, uh, ‘in the fandom realm, OTP refers to the coupling of characters--usually from the sci-fi or fantasy genres--by fans who think they make a great romantic duo and envision their lives together and share their imaginings with other fans.’”*

Charlie doubled over, beside herself with laughter. With your lips pressed into a firm line, you glanced at the boys to gauge their reactions. You knew there was no way they could possibly know what you and Charlie had been talking about, but that didn’t stop you from worrying about what Dean might think if he ever found out about the feelings you harbored for him.

“So...you’re looking forward to Cap and his girl in the movie? I’m so freaking confused,” Dean grumbled.

“Yeah…” Sam agreed, making his way to the tv. “I’m just, uh...I’m gonna start the movie now.”

“Good idea.” Charlie peered at you out of the corner of her eye. “Plenty of time to read and talk about all those ships later.”

Although you glared at her, trying to hide your amusement, nothing could deter the smug smile etched upon her face. As Sam turned the lights off and you settled in for another relaxing night with your favorite people, one thing was certain:

You were definitely going to have to take another look at that fanfiction.

CarryOnCap Crew (Forevers):

@abswritesfandoms @amanda-teaches @cosicas-cuquis @crist1216 @droidyouseek @emoryhemsworth @ericaprice2008 @flawless-disaster @janeyboo @jenn0755 @ksgeekgirl @maresmiley @memyselfandmaddox @notyourtypicalrose @randomparanoid @rynabarnesrogers @sandlee44 @scarletsoldierrr @shann-the-artist-moon @sheerioasteroidpanda @shynara51 @someday-when-you-leave-me @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan @thisismysecrethappyplace @torntaltos @waywardbaby @waywardrose13 @weebid @whimsicalrobots @wintersoldierbaby @wintersoldierissucharide @yesfanficsaremylife

Cap’s SPN Crew:

@adoptdontshoppets @akshi8278 @alexwinchester23 @chevyharvelle @deangirl7695 @dean-winchesters-bacon @fandomoniumflurry @pisces-cutie @supernaturalenchanted @superromijn @waywardnerd67 @x-waywardaf-x

#supernatural imagine #spn imagine #dean winchester imagine #supernatural reader insert #spn reader insert #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x y/n #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fic #dean winchester fluff #supernatural fluff #dean x read #dean x y/n

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kimdaily · 4 years

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Can you reflect on your experience as a popular bts tumblr blog? Maybe describe how it felt when you were at your peak in a fandom that was stanning a group that was beginning to dominate kpop vs how it feels now to still be present (and still fairly popular I assume! ) in the tumblr sphere of the fandom post bts blowup? Also what do you miss most from your early days on here? And what are you most grateful for now?

oh wow this is such a fun question djgndskgn ummm okay well

I looooooved being on tumblr, it was an escape from my reality and pressures of school and life. before this blog “blew up?” it was so fun and relaxing. I met soooo many amazing people, a lot of which I’m still currently friends with outside of tumblr/have visited/travelled the world with/stayed with/ have stayed with me, etc. it was incredible, it was such a nice welcoming community, I was able to just be myself, talk to fellow fans, create content, act dumb, joke around, meme, talk about serious things, have in depth discussions about so many things bts and non bts related. especially with being a blog for one of the least ‘liked’ or stanned members, it really meant that everyone who was following me was a namjoon stan and wanted nothing more than to just talk about him, it was like a tight knit community within a huge community. it was so crazy and so exciting to see the fandom grow with every comeback. that was my favourite time during entire time with this blog on tumblr. that was my favourite part. people who spoke to me were genuine and kind, they wanted to get to know me, the person behind the blog and also just treated me like a human lol which definitely changed drastically

then this blog really started to get a loooottt of traction, and as soon as I hit 10k, things really changed and it was never the same. as this blog continued to grow bigger and bigger, things became increasingly intense, and INCREDIBLY negative and just super stressful. as the followers continued to grow, the less people viewed me as an actual human who was doing things on here during my incredibly limited free time as my own escape and ‘fun’ time, and the more they treated me like, straight garbage? lol I was constantly being picked apart, everything I said was scrutinized, things I would say would always, without fail get twisted and people with do whatever they can to get whatever negative narrative they wanted. I remember me once saying it was none of our business to discuss the members sexuality and that we shouldn’t just assume their sexuality and to leave them be, somehow turned into me ‘pushing a straight agenda’??? and I was literally just dragged. which still to this day I still don’t understand how people somehow decided to take that out of what I said. I was always happy to speak to everyone and help anyone with any question they had but at one point, despite me still trying my best, I was treated really poorly and like a literal like machine. if I missed something, or didn’t post something my inbox was always full of people yelling at me that this was my job and my job was to make things and keep the entire fandom updated with what’s going on. I also fully remember missing namjoons solo comeback because I was at work, and couldn’t be present to gif and make content, I got a shittttt load of asks telling me I was a horrible namjoon fan who doesn’t support him and stuff? like lol okay? what? or I would get yelled at if I didn’t respond to asks in a timely manner, because that was once again ‘my job’. my inbox also became google apparently. I would get hundreds of asks a day, with not a single person talking to me, and if I didn’t respond to those asks, I would get yelled at. I never really spoke about how many followers I had because tbh it didn’t really matter, I actually would often wish I was back to being a 5k blog and just having a good old time, I would get horrible asks about me being a bitch because this blog was ‘popular’ and that because it was, I was a horrible person?? or to just shut up because no one cares about me, or that I thought highly of myself because this was a ‘big blog’ which I still don’t understand, because I never acted differently throughout the years on this blog. I was always just myself. if anything I just became more closed off and learned to not bother speaking about myself/things going on in my life because I felt like people would be happier if I just did my ‘job’ even though this blog, was always just a personal blog that had a loooott of bts content, I was not like a dedicated bts blog. oh and I remember because I always was and still am a very blunt straight forward person, I would just speak whatever is on my mind, people would always misconstrue that as me being mean or rude. but anyway, I digress

I remember becoming incredibly scared to post, to say things, to do things because I was scared of continuously being attacked. I was scared to open my inbox, or my messages. like tbh even writing this I’m thinking “omg what if I don’t word something perfectly and people will get mad at me.” it’s honestly such a weird feeling to feel like you have to constantly edit yourself but also still trying to be yourself? idk how to explain it

but as much as I would crack and let all this shit get to me at times and publicly get upset, hurt or mad, I would also keep a lot of it to myself and just deal with the toxicity on my own, and just delete a lot of the messages or asks I got. because to me this blog was an escape, not just for me, but for everyone who followed me. I didn’t want people to come here and just see the negative shit constantly, I wanted them to continue to come here, have fun, and forget about whatever was going on in their lives, even if it was for just a few minutes. so even though that was no longer the case for me, I still wanted that for others. but it also got to the point that I was scared to turn off anon because I was scared of the potential backlash, but I also wanted those who wanted to be anonymous, who were not comfortable talking to me off anon to have that comfort in the anonymity etc. things just were really difficult, I always felt like what I was doing was wrong no matter what.

it also was very disheartening to notice a lot of other people only wanting to befriend me or interact with me because of the size of this blog. it kinda made it hard to become close to people after a while. people would make assumptions about me or literally hated me without even talking to me just because of the size of this blog.

there were so many times I wanted to delete this blog and make a new blog where no one knew who I was, just so I can start off fresh and relive the best parts of blogging in the first place. just have fun again. but I also didn’t find it fair to those who followed me, who relied on this blog for some sort of comfort. nor did I find it fair for me to lose something I worked hard on, and loved

but on the other hand, there were SO MANY incredible people that followed me that made everything feel worth it. and I am so incredibly thankful and grateful for each and everyone of you. some of you really helped me when I was having some of the hardest times. some of the messages I would get had such a positive impact on me and my life. and like I mentioned before, I have met some amazing friends because of this site that are still some of my closest friends to this day. and for that, I will always be beyond thankful.

unfortunately I can’t say much about what has really happened on tumblr in the last like almost 2 years? I haven’t been around much and definitely would not consider this blog very if at all relevant haha in like mid? 2018 I kinda vanished from this site. I had a looooot of things going on in my personal life, like an insane amount of very complex, dark, hard, just straight up depressing things going on, and I was not able to deal with all of that, and the darkness of this blog so I left. I never meant for it to be as long as it has been, but it kinda just happened. like tbh part of me would love to kinda just open up about everything, though I did post a little something vaguely explaining what was going on with me. I know it didn’t make sense but I also wouldn’t even know where to start when it comes to explaining what has been going on. I also know because of what has happened with me, I was a real shitty person to some people on here. I also feel terrible that I had over 100 messages I never got around to answering during this time, and the 600+ asks I have sitting in my inbox right now. I know I let a lot of people down. but I also would like to say thank you to everyone and anyone who tried to reach out to me or giving me their best wishes during that time despite me not responding to most of you. please know I read every single thing that was sent to me, thank you

like part of me wishes I never left, but I know I wouldn’t have been able to do both, I was barely able to even survive what is going on in my personal life. I really miss this blog, I miss making things, I miss interacting with people, I miss fangirling, I miss so many things about this blog. despite everything, I would not take any of it back. having this blog was such a fun and unique experience, for the most part at least.

some unique ass moments like the fact I made a goupchat for namjoon stans to have fun and interact with each other and befriend each other in a more accessible and less intimidating way than over tumblr and I think at the peak there was 300+ people in that chat. and that chat is I believe 3 years old and is still active to this day. or that I somehow was in talks with a lot of namjoon fansites and actually worked closely with a namjoon fansite working on things. or people recognizing me in public which I still find wild, meeting some of you at the concerts and hanging out. or being able to befriend people with the same interests as me, becoming close friends and travelling together/visiting each other, etc. or the fact that I was able to help some of you though out some dark or difficult times, or opening up to me with things you’d not feel comfortable talking to with anyone else. or being told I was the inspiration for some of you to do so many things, like going back to school, changing majors, seeking help, loving yourself, etc. or getting sent fan art of myself???? that was crazy! there are so many more things I could say, but this post is already so long, and I doubt anyone is even still reading haha. but I never thought things like that would have happened to me ever, but it did, and I will be forever so thankful to all of you. thank you, and thank you to everyone who was there or me during the ups and downs. I know I wasn’t always the greatest friend I could have been, thank you for accepting me for who I was, thank you for being there when I needed an escape, thank you for everything.

this whole post is probably so poorly written, but esdljgknx I tried, I know I’m leaving out soooooooooo many things that I could have said or should have said, but this is already sooooo long holy. plus I have to get back to working on my stuff, the reason I came out to this coffee shop I’m sitting at right now haha

#anonymous #answered

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cards-onthetable · 5 years

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Seems I'm wearing grumpy pants again... sorry

(LOL OOPS I get notifications for asks and messages but not submissions for some reason, so I’m just seeing this. Sorry if it’s been sitting since last week...)

Thanks for the review. I needed that laugh!! But I had questions, oh so many questions. So I watched the Jamko bits on instagram. I tried to send an ask but not enough characters (do you wanna punch me yet)?

1. Why does arsehole Janko have Jamie's mobile number? Do they have a relationship independent of Eddie? Maybe it's just me being stupid for assuming, but wouldn't Jamie's number be unlisted to avoid dealing with BS from those he arrests?

I’m sure Jamie’s actual cell number is not public knowledge - Maybe Armin knew which precinct Jamie’s at, and went through Police Channels to contact him? Like maybe that’s his duty phone as a sergeant or something? Or maybe Lena had passed on an NYPD courtesy card to him in jail lol. Hooray for plot holes. Who knows.

2. Did Lena know more about her husbands shady dealings than she lets on/Eddie is aware of? To me that would explain why never divorced. Or she may just be the marriage is forever no matter what type. Given the strained relationship between Eddie and her mother and also the way Lena seems to have treated her, I'm not so sure Lena was totally clueless. She may have moved a bit because people give her grief but she sure is not struggling financially so maybe her husband in jail is worth the high life.

It wouldn’t surprise me. When I wrote (and named, yo) Lena Janko I characterized her as a petty, materialistic person who was a knowing bystander at least, if not actually complicit in Armin’s crimes. But lol I also wrote Armin as a reformed, sympathetic, Good Guy out of prison so what do I know? But we saw that Eddie does not have contact with her father so I do assume Lena still has contact with him at this point - how else did he know Eddie’s engaged, which precinct to find her fiancé, etc?

3. Does Eddie still drive her Porsche? Given that it came from a dubious money source, it seems odd to me that she would still be driving it. The fanfare of the wedding will invite media attention so why make it so easy to make nasty comments? You know Garrett is all about OPTICS and she is about to be a REAGAN aka NYPD ROYALTY. What if Frank is asked about their relationship at a press conference? OPTICS PEOPLE! OPTICS!

No idea dude. When’s the last time we actually saw that car? I don’t know but previously I accepted the headcanon that she kept it at her parents’ suburban McMansion most of the time, with rare times she’ll bring it to the city for a few days. Parking in NYC is expensive af, yo. Like an actual assigned space costs as much as a second rent in some places. But now we know Lena’s been moving around the city for the last 5 years, not up in Westchester babysitting Eddie’s car, so your guess is as good as mine. As far as the optics, I’m not sure how they’ll play it. Lena has brought up the Irony of Eddie, daughter of a criminal, marrying the PC’s son but nobody else has said very much. Maybe the show will address it in a typical Who Cares way and it’ll just be a non-issue.

4. REDACTED because I have some Thoughts about this topic that I hope to address in this fic I’m hoping to finish soon. 👍

5. Why do you hate Anthony? I personally enjoy his sarcasm. But then I also enjoy Gormley's putting the mouth in gear before the brain so frequently.

WHY DO I HATE ANTHONY? OH HERE’S A CAN OF WORMS, AUSSIE. But I’ll be succinct. Anthony’s entire existence bothers me. He’s only here to make Erin’s lawyer-y storylines into detective-y storylines. How often do we see Erin actually act as a lawyer? We usually see her and Anthony Investigating or maybe arguing/discussing a case. We rarely see her actually going her job (except when her ADA position conflicts with Frank’s NYPD agenda). It’s like the show runners have no faith in their audience, and think the viewers only want to see detective/police storylines - as if lawyer storylines, and that whole branch of the justice system, would be too Boring for tv. So I hate Anthony because he takes away any opportunities for Erin - a supposedly powerful and successful woman - to do her actual job, and her entire position as ADA is minimized in the show. It’s insulting to the audience and insulting to Erin too. Anthony’s entire existence is unnecessary for the show to go on. Let us see Erin actually be a lawyer in a context other than being the Reagan Family Bad Guy (and maybe that would humanize her a little bit! We all know she gets some pretty shit writing/characterization lately) and drop this whole charade that investigative, action-packed storylines are the only interesting or relevant storylines.

The whole Jamko and the precinct secret is still BULLSHIT. There is no way there is no push back if their coworkers do in fact know. Does anybody know if this is actually allowed in the NYPD? A superior can date a direct subordinate? Seems ridiculous if that is actually true. Corruption allegations would be made daily. (Agreed yo. We all know it’s ridiculous. And like, does the precinct know? Are they still in the dark? Jamie and Eddie can discuss wedding plans in front of everyone, but it’s still a secret? Coooolcoolcool.)

Jamie not understanding Eddie's messy family situation is BULLSHIT for someone about to be married. If Eddie can't talk to Jamie about this because she fears being judged/not supported then really they should not be getting married. I'm not saying spouses have to share absolutely everything, but what you go through in life often does shape how you see the world generally, so the fact both Eddie and Jamie have chosen to not discuss important aspects of their lives with each other should be a massive red flag. (AGREED AGREED AGREED. I have so many issues all the time. If they’d dated like normal people before jumping into rings and vows, they’d have worked out the majority of this Big Stuff before deciding to commit to one another for life. Like, you typically want to know these things as relevant info when making that decision to get engaged - not after. This “get engaged and figure everything else out later” shit was/is terrible. If the show insisted on doing it this way, they AT LEAST should have moved the Armin situation and the Baby Discussion to the first few episodes of the season. Don’t talk to me about the weird time lapses and inconsistencies in this show, I don’t care if a month of ~actual time~ passes in one week between back to back episodes... they should not be introducing these topics for the first time in the two episodes leading up to the wedding. GOD I HATE EVERYTHING.) There's a reason divorce is so prevalent. I wonder if Eddie feels she should reconcile with her parents because of the closeness of the Reagan family. Or is it something Eddie herself actually wants? Family or not, sometimes people are just toxic and you need to cut them off for your own sanity. (I hope the Reagans don’t put pressure on Eddie to fix things with her parents, ugh. That would be overstepping in a major way and yeah, your relationship to someone shouldn’t trump their toxicity - like Eddie doesn’t have to forgive her parents just because they’re her parents.)

We've already discussed my thoughts on the Reagan siblings getting arsehole sprung from jail before the show aired (spoiler: they were not nice thoughts folks), but as for the BB continuity, consider this: the only consistency is the inconsistency!

@kwannemacher and I have kinda discussed the whole prison fiasco and I think arsehole lost his temper one night after watching a TV show that drove him insane so he started a prison riot and got extra time. He didn't just throw things at TV, he tore TV off wall, set fire to his mattress and started an all in brawl. So 5 years extra for totally losing his shit. BB has the capacity to ignite tempers here so it's feasible arsehole Janko totally lost it. Probably watched one of those dating shows where they pick the so called love of their lives and he couldn't believe who the guy picked. We all have bad days!! (😂😂😂😂😂 omg I can be on board with this)

In closing I hope @ontherockswithsalt has insurance because I am wondering if her TV can withstand the wedding viewing party if you will be enjoying with her (lol I think I will be, and I plan to wrap myself in whole body bubble wrap for the protection of myself and everyone/everything around me). I'm already emotional 🤮🤮🤮 if they go with their own vows. I may be wrong, but I think Will shows Jamie's soft side next week. He won't be dead face or whatever it is you call him. (Dude I am ALL IN on those ridiculous vows. If they’d only said them once, I’d be rolling my eyes @ the grossness, but it would be whatever. BUT THEY MADE A POINT OF SAYING THEM TWICE so they’re committed at this point. Make Jamie recite those ridiculous words for the third time. I want to see the pain on his terrible face as he suffers through that again. If we don’t get those vows I’ll riot.)

Enjoy your week

Aussie

P.S. Yes I realise his name is Armin, but that guy is a narcissistic ARSEHOLE

#submission #aussie

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hopeduckling13 · 6 years

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Find My Way Back To You: Chapter 19

Summary: Hope Swan-Jones is the product of the product of true love and her true love, so her having very powerful magic was always in the cards. Luckily she lives in a town where everyone is very familiar with magic, so nothing can go wrong, can it?

Or so everyone thought, but then one day as a newborn Hope accidently travels back in time with her mother Emma.

How will the past population of Storybrooke react to their Savior having another kid and being married? And more importantly will the Savior and her baby daughter find a way back home to all of their loved ones?

- - -

Catch Up:

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14857127/chapters/34395467

FF.NET: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12964592/1/Find-My-Way-Back-To-You

Tumblr: [Prologue] [Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11] [Chapter 12] [Chapter 13] [Chapter 14] [Chapter 15] [Chapter 16] [Chapter 17] [Chapter 18]

--- PAST EMMA’S POV ---

What the hell?! Emma can’t possibly have kissed Hook? Right?

I mean she’s me. He’s Hook. I would never ever kiss Hook. I don’t even like him. This just doesn’t add up. Why would I ever even consider kissing him? Sure, he isn’t too bad looking and we do kind of understand each other, but that doesn’t automatically make me want to kiss him. He’s one of the most annoying people I know, so kissing him would only lead to him being even worse than he already is with all the teasing and smirking 24/7. I swear if I could, I’d staple that eyebrow of his on his face, so he couldn’t raise it every few seconds any more.

There has to be another explanation for the whole kiss problem. One that actually makes sense.

It’s probably like I originally assumed. Hook is a crazy person or a liar. So, him believing this kiss happened, doesn’t make it true. He thinks it happened since he believes everyone loves him as much as he loves himself. But he’s wrong about that. Most people are just annoyed by him – including myself.

There’s no way a version of me kissed him. And besides my obvious dislike towards him, Emma being a happily married woman proves this, too. She wouldn’t risk what she has with her husband, whom she seems to love a lot, for a kiss from Hook – in the past. She seems to think they’re true love after all, so she honestly wouldn’t cheat on him – especially not with such an infuriating pirate. The few failed relationships I did have, never involved any cheating on my part either. So, I doubt I would start now that I am in a great one.

So, let’s just move on and agree that Hook is insane.

“Oh, Swan, that kiss did most certainly happen. You’re just too stubborn to admit it. But one day you will and that's when all the fun begins.” He smirks at me and I consider leaving, but I know it won’t do me any good. He’ll just run after me. And I’d have nowhere else to go except for the loft, which is out of the question for at least another few hours.

So, I order another glass of rum as a staff member passes us, and lean back into the booth, trying to enjoy my evening away from the craziness happening at the loft. I do my best to ignore Hook, but his constant staring sure does make it hard. If I don’t control myself, I know I’ll punch him soon.

I down another shot of rum, thinking it might distract me enough to ignore Hook for a little, but that’s not the case. That’s also when I have enough. I turn towards him and snap at him. “What?!”

He raises his eyebrow in surprise at my sudden outburst. And here he is constantly going on about how he can read my every thought since I’m an open book to him. Seems like he was wrong now, doesn’t it? One point for me.

“Quit staring at me!” I say angrily.

“I’m just enjoying the view, love.” He smirks. I punch his arm lightly, which just makes him chuckle. I know I should’ve hit him harder. Now he’ll just assume it was a friendly little punch.

“That’s such a cliché.” I reply, trying to distract him. Hook seems to be confused by that, so my plan officially worked. He knew that he probably doesn’t know the word. I’m not sure whether it exists in the Enchanted Forest and in addition he’s 300 years old or something, so how would he even know? “It’s a kind of sentence, that is used very often – to the extent that it’s overused – and it sounds creepy because of that.” I actually offer him a smile. “Also, I’m not your ‘love’ so stop calling me that.”

“Well, it is the truth, love. And if I’m not allowed to look at you, then how am I supposed to figure out why you’re so vexed today?”

Just proves again how much I am not an open book. That time on the beanstalk he must’ve only gotten lucky. He couldn’t actually ‘read my mind’ then, just like he can’t now. Everything he did knew was probably just a guess or Cora spied on us and told him to make him seem trustworthy.

I never completely believed him – only partly since we seem to be a lot alike, bonded by our pasts – when he called me an open book. And I am very relieved that that’s right. Not a single person in the world needs to know my business. I’ve done well on my own since I was a little kid, and that hasn’t changed. I don’t need anyone in my life. It’s great to have Henry, but he’s really the only person I’m willing to get vulnerable with. That’s a smart choice, right?

Why does Hook want to know what’s up with me anyway? Is he still working for Cora? I mean he said that she has her own agenda here and I actually believed him then. My lie detector didn’t indicate a lie, which seems to be the case whenever I talk to him. He never seems to lie to me, but that doesn’t make sense. He’s a pirate and they are supposed to lie. So, what’s his deal right now?

He doesn’t really care, does he? He’s probably just bored or inquisitive.

“As if you actually care about what has me in such a bad mood.” I say dryly, trying not to let it show, that this actually scares the crap out of me. Why does he have to seem so trustworthy and nice all the time? It just confused my brain into thinking that he cares about me. But he doesn’t. I mean, who could ever care about me? I’m not someone that other people give a crap about. That’s how its always been.

Also, I’m always doing my best at being mean to him, so why doesn’t he ever leave? Why doesn’t he let me push him away? It’s always been so easy with everyone else in my life – they even left me without me trying to push them out of my life.

“Maybe I do care.” He’s almost whispering by now, but I hear every single word crystal clear. The worst thing about this is that it sounds so damn sincere. He’s actually serious about this, isn’t he? I was prepared for that admission, at least that’s what I thought when I teased him. But I wasn’t really ready for this. “So, what is it that’s bothering you, Swan? Maybe I can help…”

He must have better things to do then sitting here and offering to listen to my problems, right? People don’t put me first. Is he doing this because he’s got no one either? Or because he actually wants to help me?

Tears build behind my eyelids and I just stare at him with big eyes. I don’t know what to say, so I tell myself that sometimes actions speak louder than words. I shift in the booth to sit closer to him. I lean in very slowly to make that kiss he keeps talking about real, but just as our lips are about to touch, I hear the bartender setting down a little bottle of rum on our table.

I pull away very fast, so that I’m almost hitting my head on the wall behind me in the progress. I say “This didn’t happen, so never mention it again – not to me nor to anyone else.” to Hook before getting out of my seat and leaving the Rabbit Hole. He doesn’t follow me this time.

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sparda3g · 6 years

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Tokyo Ghoul:re Chapter 169 Review

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Just when you thought the two hyped fights were going to be skipped, Ishida actually delivers them and then some. It feels a bit surreal that we are witnessing the two feuds from the beginning of the series now being dealt with. While I can’t say for certain that it will all conclude in here since I don’t know the intention of Ishida’s writing at this time, but I don’t mind leave the thinking for another time. This chapter was great and intense from start to finish with two riveting fights and an insight of Clowns that I didn’t expect to learn here.

The chapter mostly focused on those two bouts that you came to expect. Our worries of being off-paneled are gone the moment the first clash begins. Before talking about the bouts, I want to cover the moment that happened in the middle of the chapter, which is mainly about setting up for the next confrontation. I assume that Ishida wants to get a head start with it, so there won’t be any need for introductory. I am referring to Furuta, now wearing a mask but no Rize in sight.

He is seen once again, somewhere in the underground of 19th Ward. The perplexing piece that I am not so sure if we are supposed to think deeply about is when he cursed out on Kanou for something. It’s not clear on why he said that as he was looking up at the giant Kagune. Was it because there was something that Kanou backstabbed him over that we don’t know of yet? He did want to break the cage so to speak, but after that, there’s nothing more to it as far as I am aware. Again, I don’t know if we are supposed to wonder.

What’s not to wonder is whether Kaneki will meet Furuta again, because that just happen here. I did chuckle at Furuta’s reaction towards him being alive. It is like, “Well, haven’t you seen his journey? You would be wondering many times before.” I can’t tell if he’s being a troll or not, but I believe it’s a good mix of two; genuinely surprised but perhaps not all that much. Fight or not, I am very interested to see how their confrontation will go down.

It’s clear that the main attraction of the two belongs to Uta versus Yomo, which dives deeper into the lore. In the meantime, Amon versus Donato does present another factor on the table. Let’s start off with that fight first. The fight so far has been engaging with a nice clever trick that Amon pulls off here as well as some of the creepiest tone done by Donato. The fight reminisces closely to a knight’s battle with the use of spear and shield. It boils down to the battle of smarts.

Amon shields himself from Donato’s Kagune, though I wonder if it’s because of that it led to the next attack of his. Amon launches his quinque right at him, supposedly blocked by his own shield. Then it takes a surprise turn, no pun intended, with Amon using his Ghoul side Ukaku Kagune to force the attack to penetrate deeper and surprisingly spear right through him. That was a clever play. The combination of two crated a critical hit; dare I say for massive damage.

I remember Nico always take the abuse from Jason back then, so it’s no surprise but alarming that he can heal Donato rapidly. It’s worth mentioning that Owl was weakened once he was hurt. It does confirm if he is weakened, so as the puppet that is Owl. Now it’s definitely up to Amon to save others.

Sadly, he was ambushed by Donato’s clones from behind. I got to say, he does live up to his creepy nature with his sadistic expression that really gives me chills. It certainly connects to his disturbing fascination with kids; God that’s horrifying. The chills only increased when Amon takes Kagune stabs from behind. I doubt he’s done; he may have to go to Kakuja to get the upper hand before it’s too late.

The main event of the chapter is between Uta and Yomo and it is enticing from start to finish. It took Yomo to let Uta roam free of his psychotic personality. He doesn’t waste time to attack with his Kagune at full force while Yomo shields himself with his electric ability. The force was too strong that eventually push away to the air, which leads to some of really cool aerial combat. Uta could have done a fatal blow, but Yomo is a legit strong fighter, so he’s good at timing. The mix of MMA and Kagune is an intriguing combat style.

Thankfully, both fight scenes are clean and easy to follow. One scans may look sort of choppy, but the other one does look solid and easy to follow. I like how much added details it has with the surrounding and their maneuvers. Only Amon versus Donato is done in the open field but again, it’s due to the nature of a knight’s battle, so it’s based on timing and smarts. With Yomo versus Uta, the combat is more agile and free roaming to different part of the roof. It’s like shifting from heavyweight to cruiserweight; one will be faster paced. It’s great.

To my surprise, I wasn’t expecting for Itori to be more on the sentimental side of herself here. Not that she wants to save Yomo, rather reflecting what the Clowns are driven by. It’s a mysterious group that you often read a different agenda behind them. The founder Roma founded it for the Ghouls to spread chaos out of amusement. Itori reflects a different side of their nature.

It’s practically a misfit group with many miserable Ghouls that can’t take the despair of living in a corrupted society. They cannot be loved by people; they cannot be loved by the world. It tainted them as cursed beings. Yomo’s misery and hardships cannot be compared to their misfortune because they actually gone through plenty of that and perhaps even more. You can say that their despair has already reached its peak for them and nothing could save them from the eternal abyss.

They are tired from despair and the only way they can get some feeling towards them is to create despair for others. It does explain the action Itori tried to cause with the Ghouls after witnessing Dragon terrorizing the city. From there on, they will put themselves onstage, cracking jokes, so they won’t have to go insane. Her words were well written yet disturbingly sad.

There was a story that goes by how a clown put an act to put a show for people to laugh, but it disguises their miserable hollow state. It’s disturbing to note when they caused chaos to others, their reaction shows so much life to them like that’s the way to live by. It gets to the point of insanity, which is ironic from her viewpoint. The Clowns is practically a cult that has many reasons to live under by. It’s hard to say if this is everyone’s agenda but it does picture them as terrifying that doesn’t have anything to lose. It’s no wonder the past clowns die without any cry or whimper; even Roma just go out with a farewell like it is all good. It’s great in writing perspective but creepy to know one can exist.

Yomo is trying to be the good guy in this bout with him stating that he doesn’t want to kill him or be killed by him. I remember how it wasn’t really known if Yomo does see him as a real friend, but this really got him to this predicament of letting out his feelings. It’s a real shame that Uta is a sociopath that only awakens his inner urges when dealing with Yomo. It does make me wonder what would happen if he were to kill Yomo here; where his amusement goes to next. It’s probably best to kill Uta before he can find a new joy elsewhere.

The chapter ends on a fearsome note with Uta going Kakuja; hell bent to devour Yomo after so long. The design is seriously good including how the tattoos are still presented in its upmost detailed form. It is fitting for his design to cover his face like how his persona tends to be portrayed. I also like the inserted quote from part one, “I cannot live with you and I cannot live without you;” the perfect illustration of this bout. He was already winning the fight, but he decides to go all out right away. If Yomo doesn’t have a Kakuja, well he’s done for. Granted, he can try to play trickery like before with Mutsuki and Aura, but it’s going to be really difficult to overcome this magnitude.

I want to say this should close the case of Uta being the original One-Eyed King, but you never know. I would put on the side until he is dealt with. It’s hard to see where this is heading, similar feeling with chapter 144 once claimed to be the ending. It’s also hard to tell if Ishida is intending to end it here or we are being fooled in the process. He is no stranger to troll, so who is to say we are safe.

This was an enticing chapter with great action and more interesting points. Kaneki met Furuta, which can spark an intriguing discussion or compelling fight. Amon versus Donato was engaging in its own pacing and tone. Yomo versus Uta was exciting with their friendship on the line and it could only get worse. The artwork is great and although it may take a second read to understand the combat, it is riveting once acknowledge the pattern. The climatic pinpoint is now locked with their encounter and with the speculation of the next volume being the last one due to the release date lands on anime last episode premiere we are going to learn soon enough.

#tokyo ghoul:re #tokyo ghoul re #tokyo ghoul :re #tokyo ghoul #chapter 169 #review

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thekingofsadness · 6 years

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Examining DW9′s Liu Shan

This is for dear ol’ @punishedkrauss for being just plain awesome and for @daolunofshiji for being Zhong Hui + beard but with Liu Shan cutscenes. I’m grateful for both of you guys.

OK now into the meat of this. A big obvious SPOILER ALERT is in place because this is Dynasty Warriors 9′s Liu Shan and let me tell you, he’s NOT the same as DW7/8 Liu Shan. I’ll be covering Liu Shan’s story (chapters 10-13 in DW9) INCLUDING his ending cutscene as well as what’s up with his personality. This will all be in great detail so yeah, if you don’t want to get spoiled, don’t read this.

TLDR it’s EVERYTHING I ever wanted from Liu Shan, and more. I love it, and I’m sure you will too.

A lot of characters in DW9 have gotten more character and personality when before they did not. Zhu Ran’s not all about fire attacks anymore, Jiang Wei is just plain bats**t insane (in a good way), and Dong Zhuo now is a genuine, menacing threat. It’s all good and brings out new, interesting facets to characters that were before just one-note and downright boring.

That’s not what happened to Liu Shan. What they did to Liu Shan in DW9 was change the focus of his personality. But to explain what happened to his personality, I gotta explain his story.

Now, Liu Shan’s story is much more based on his historical counterparts actions. He’s a young emperor eager to fill in the shoes of his father and because of a lack of experience, he initially leaves everything to Zhuge Liang—not before, of course, listening to what must be done. He’s ultimately a very passive ruler but that does not mean he is not trying. He makes sure to listen to everybody’s plan because giving his permission and he makes sure to help in the pre-battle preparations whenever he can. Of course, things go great, the Nanman are pacified, and soon the Northern Campaigns against Wei start.

A thing I never even considered but shows up brilliantly is Liu Shan’s concern about rest for people. If you play Liu Bei’s final chapter (chapter 9), it is the death of his sworn brothers that sends Liu Bei to a rage, and he is merciless and tireless until his brothers are avenged but it comes at the cost of rapidly declining health, resulting in Liu Bei’s death. Liu Shan knows this, he is worried about this happening again, and every single time before a major battle, WITHOUT FAIL, he beseeches Zhuge Liang (and later Jiang Wei) to make sure to rest.

He’s basically the group mom, always worrying about everybody’s health because of his unresolved fears about his own father’s death. Unfortunately, his worries are very much valid because Zhuge Liang dies in the Wuzhang plains precisely BECAUSE he worked himself to the bone. Just like Liu Bei before him.

With Jiang Wei now at the helm instead of Zhuge Liang, he plans to carry on his predecessor’s legacies and makes more campaigns against Wei, all of them ending in failure. Jiang Wei motivates the new generation into a frenzy, getting them all riled up for war but slowly Liu Shan understands just how detrimental it all is. Jiang Wei is bringing up everybody’s hope for a battle that cannot be won, bringing more chaos and destruction. Liu Shan tries to reason with Jiang Wei and everybody else but they’re all too caught up in the madness and their own personal agenda with Wei. So they don’t listen to him, and admonish him despite being the only voice of reason. The only person who listens in the end is Xingcai. (Video link here)

With Jiang Wei’s failures, he starts butting heads with everybody’s LOVE-TO-HATE GUY, Huang Hao. Whatever Huang Hao’s intentions are (bad, very very bad), he is trying to be the voice of reason in Liu Shan’s stead, trying to dissuade Jiang Wei from more pointless battles. There are now two factions within Shu and unfortunately, most of the playable cast happen to be in Jiang Wei’s camp. This builds up to Jiang Wei’s final campaign where he’s called back to the capital, Chengdu, because Huang Hao used Liu Shan’s name to bring them back.

Then the conquest of Shu occurs. Everybody is scattered and Liu Shan is trying to minimise casualties but he feels he is lost. Unlike everybody else, he doesn’t have a role model to guide him, and he feels he is lost, without a purpose. He needs to make a decision once and for all and he needs to make it fast. He defeats the first assault but Jin’s main army is fast approaching. He decides to end the madness by surrendering Shu, basically making sure everybody is spared. Jiang Wei approaches Liu Shan after the surrender, finally understanding his lord’s intentions but ultimately rejecting them.

In Liu Shan’s ending, he is to enter a carriage to go to Jin’s capital of Luoyang, leaving Chengdu behind forever with Xingcai. He tries to give a comforting speech about enjoying life but the peasants, Jiang Wei’s propaganda still fresh in their mind, call him a coward and throw rocks at the carriage as it drives away but Liu Shan only smiles. It’s only in the carriage that he laments his mistakes, feeling guilty for surrendering Shu. Xingcai tries to comfort him but he pushes her away because he is going against everybody’s wishes to keep them safe. Xingcai also feels upset but he comforts her, insisting that it is his fault alone that Shu is gone, a final “please” to tell her that he is responsible and that she should not feel guilty too. (Video link 2 here)

AND THEN THEY KISSSSSSS!!! AW, COME ON, KOEI, WHY DIDN’T THEY KISS?! IT’S MUCH MORE BLATANT THAT THEY’RE TOGETHER SO WHY CAN’T THEY GET THEIR MOVE ON?! I bet they were gonna kiss, I BET YOU CUT IT AAAA—

A-ahem, sorry. Anyway, it’s time to get into the differences in personality between DW9 Liu Shan versus DW7/8 Liu Shan.

The first and most important difference is that Liu Shan is NOT a fool. No one calls him a fool (except the ending, but for different reasons) and he makes no pretense of hiding his intellect. He’s the voice of reason for Shu, he sees the big picture, but everyone except Xingcai are too ignorant to see it. He is passive initially out of lack of experience and remains passive only because he knows he can’t get through to people.

Which brings me to the second difference. DW9 Liu Shan is not as silver tongued as his previous counterparts. In fact, DW9 Liu Shan clearly has a lot of things going on in his head, so many ideas and opinions that he wants to tell the world but the problem is that he doesn’t know how to convince people to his side. He doesn’t know how to express his true feelings in a way that people will understand. It’s the complete opposite of DW7/8 Liu Shan who used people’s perception of him to manipulate their understanding. While DW7/8 Liu Shan is deceptive and manipulative with the best intentions living in the cover of the fool, DW9 Liu Shan is honest but incapable of expressing his feelings, leading others to assume he’s idiotic. He doesn’t know what to say so he’s quiet, and it is this inaction that leads to the spiraling chaos in Shu.

The third difference, is that Liu Shan is not at all lazy in this incarnation. Sure, he gets tired easily, and he definitely does prefer keeping his strength rather than exerting himself, but when hard work is needed Liu Shan will help and with little to no complaints. In fact, he’d be very much happy to help others but thinks his ability to help is limited or that he will get in the way of the more capable, which is why he’s usually sitting around all the time.

I guess the best way to sum it up is that while DW7/8 Liu Shan works with people’s expectations and plays the fool because he thinks it’s easier that way, DW9 Liu Shan actively tries and fails to defy people’s expectations and his efforts to try and help others go nowhere because no one listens to him.

Well, actually there’s only one person who listens to him. And that’s Xingcai. And I gotta talk about this because I am way too obvious about how much I ship those two together. LIU SHAN X XINGCAI IS CANON, BABY! WHOO!

In DW9, Liu Shan’s and Xingcai’s relationship is even less ambiguous than before. She’s his loyal bodyguard and retainer and most importantly, Liu Shan’s only confidant. She’s the only one who listens to her lord and he tells her effortlessly what’s on his mind and it’s hinted at not-so-subtly that there’s definitely something more between the two. She’s not swept away in the chaos of war and listens to Liu Shan, who is probably the only voice of reason left in late Shu. If you’ve seen the first video, she crouches down and puts her hands over his, a pose that is almost identical to the one Zhenji makes in her ending to her husband (video here)

Then there’s Liu Shan’s ending, where she tries to comfort him once again but he gently refuses her help, saying he must carry the guilt. And she’s shaking, equally tormented as he is because she also feels guilty. She may be able to support her lord but she is a soldier first and foremost. She follows orders, not makes them, and she knows she can’t be Liu Shan’s voice when he is silent because she too is bad at expressing her feelings. In fact in the two cutscenes, she doesn’t express her emotions in words but in action. Crouched down and hands over her lord’s hand in comfort, the shake of her body as she takes a shuddery breath to stop herself from crying, the slow loll of her head when she realises she can’t help Liu Shan. That’s how Xingcai expresses herself. And that’s why she too feels guilty in his ending.

A thing that was mentioned briefly towards the end of Liu Shan’s campaign is his remorse for not having someone like Zhuge Liang by his side. In the end, Liu Shan does not have a rolemodel to guide his actions. He only really has himself to motivate him. Xingcai supports him, there is no question about it, but she doesn’t stimulate him or give him ideas about how to go on because she too is equally clueless. And if you think about it carefully, he’s the only ruler without a clearly defined rolemodel and supporter. Liu Bei had Zhuge Liang, Fa Zheng and his sworn brothers; Cao Cao had Xiahou Dun, Xiahou Yuan, and almost all of the strategists; Cao Pi looked up to his father but also has Sima Yi for support and in turn when Sima Yi takes over he also looks to Cao Pi’s rule as inspiration with his wife and sons to help him. All of the Sun rulers have family, by blood or by bond, and that guides them. Even Zhang Jiao has his brothers, Dong Zhuo and his granddaughter Dong Bai, Lu Bu and Zhang Liao, every ruler, EVERY RULER, had someone to look up to. Not Liu Shan.

Liu Shan does not idolise his father. In the game they have few interactions. Liu Bei’s story ends before Liu Shan’s begins and in the end, Liu Bei’s only legacy in Liu Shan is heightening Liu Shan’s fear of people wasting away by overexerting themselves. Zhuge Liang is not a role model. He controls Liu Shan and there’s no real relationship outside of strategist and ruler, and Zhuge Liang dies in the same way Liu Bei did. Jiang Wei is not a rolemodel, in fact if Liu Shan doesn’t dislike Jiang Wei he certainly holds the strategist in some contempt because he’s clearly not at all fine with his bull by the end of the story. And like I said, Xingcai is emotional support only. A steady rock. But rocks can’t give him advice or tell him what’s right and what’s wrong.

That’s why Liu Shan’s final command to surrender is so powerful. Because HE made the decision. Not Jiang Wei, not Xingcai, nobody forced him into this decision, he alone made it. In sparing many lives he ended an era, a kingdom, and he has to take responsibility for that decision. He chose to make that decision even if he knew it would earn him the ire of his people, even if he knew people would brand him a coward and a fool and curse his name until his death. It’s probably the most difficult decision anyone in the game has to make—whether to fight a futile war or surrender and be villified—and he had to make it himself and that is probably Liu Shan’s shining, greatest moment. He’ll carry the guilt and he’ll carry the blame because that, he believes, is what an emperor does and he will carry it until the end of his days.

All in all, Liu Shan is a tragic figure in DW9. He has a fine ability to see reason in a world of madness but no one can see the world through his eyes. He’s not as talented as everybody else but he is still smart and he is still strong and capable but with everybody taking responsibility, he’s forced to keep to the sidelines and watch Shu crumble beneath his feet. It’s not the obfuscating stupidity he had before. He never truly lies, he just keeps to himself because when he tries to open his mouth he’s almost immediately shut down. Even if he did take control, stood up for his beliefs and forced people to listen, there was no way Shu would have survived for long. Perhaps it’s a sin of inaction but ultimately the fate of Shu was out of his grasp from the get go.

I really do love this interpretation of Liu Shan. I liked the sneakiness of DW7/8, don’t get me wrong, but it’s not easy to see the truth behind the mask he wore. In DW9 he is far more sympathetic and far easier to understand his motivations. He’s flawed in that he did not act when he should have, a far more understandable flaw than pretending to be an idiot to manipulate others from the background, regardless of intentions. And I love Liu Shan’s ending. It’s everything I hoped for: Liu Shan x Xingcai moments, bittersweet ending, NO ‘le bu si shu’ scene, it’s perfect! I feel like they tailored that ending to me, like KT was for some reason looking at my opinions and then altered the ending to suit my criteria.

Liu Shan is great in DW9. I love him as a flawed character and I really do think you guys will enjoy it too. It’s a slightly different but refreshing take on his character, more defined by his historical actions than his villainous romanticised version, and his story is heart wrenching. I’m sure that if you didn’t like his character before, you will feel for his struggle and maybe, just maybe, feel a little bit more sympathetic for his plight.

#Dynasty Warriors 9 #Dynasty Warriors #Liu Shan #lordliushan #thekingofsadness #OK this was VERY very long #But I had to write about literally everything I could #I was this close to explaining even Liu Shan's specific battles in DW9 but I felt that might take things a little too far #Also. I can't remember which battles he participated in and which he didn't. So yeah that happened #I hope you like this. I realise I might have blabbed a lot but I really do love Liu Shan ad there is so much to say about him and his story #I'm also kinda excited that this game might mean Liu Shan x Xingcai gets just a bit more publicity.#And maybe I WON'T be the only one who's writing fanfiction of them #OK that might be a stretch but that's the dream

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insecure-hbo-recaps · 7 years

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hella shook

Previously: Issa wanted to get a roster going. Molly for some reason didn't know what it was about Sterling K Brown. Dro's marriage was open. Lawrence was used as a prop for a racist threesome. He lied about it. Issa and Daniel made amends.

Issa's in traffic in her fairly new model car I might add. She is on her phone at every red light and doesn't notice that she's on E. She's wearing a black and white cookie coat, look at this:

Ees! Jesus. She stops at exactly 9:45 cents because she's poor. She finally makes it to her destination, serving up a "special delivery, sir" for Daniel. They awkwardly joke about how silly she's being and he opens the door with a smug smile. They're very attuned and cute and happy and whatnot.

Hey! They got honeycomb towers in LA too, apparently. Unless this is a scene where Molly is skyping with Quintin in Chicago, which the immediate shot of an L lets me know it is. See?

God I fucking love my city. That's the green line by the way. (If you're not familiar with Chicago, this is what I mean by "honeycomb towers":)

They're downtown near State and Kinzie, where I once went out with a professor from Boston who I thought looked like Mark Zuckerberg. (Public House is the bar there.) We watched the world series where the red sox won that year and it had been such a fun date, I was really disappointed when I never heard from him again. Oh well - in hindsight whatever I wore is probably not something I would wear now.

Molly is actually in Chicago this time, and Quintin is helping her keep the associates straight. He's wearing a tan vest and Malcolm X glasses and is it this show or somewhere else where they make jokes about a preacher body? Because good grief if I don't think of an old timey Civil Rights Movement era preacher every time I see him, lol. Molly points out there's a lot of black people at this office, and Quintin says he doesn't understand how she could work in the LA office; it reminds him of why he went to Howard.

Quintin asks whether Molly has said anything about her pay inequality but Molly hasn't. He asks why she isn't considering leaving, because their firm is not the only fish in the sea. Obviously this has never occurred to Molly. It's like she gets blinders on about certain things she thinks are acceptable or that she should want or be doing, and is incapable of considering any options outside of that. Apparently Molly is stuck in a sunken cost fallacy, which means you end up sticking out a situation that has long since expired just because you've already invested so much time into it already. Quintin encouages her to consider her options. Oh, there's the "pastor's body" joke. He really does look like a pastor.

Back in LA, Issa is getting dressed while Daniel is still in bed watching Due North. He asks whether she has plans the next night, but Issa demurs, unsure of his intentions. Daniel's body is insane.

Elsewhere, Lawrence is on a run with his coworkers, the blonde and Arpana. He won't be at work the next day because he has jury duty. Another coworker shows up and we get the exposition that they are training for a marathon. I know people hang out with their coworkers like this but I am antisocial and weird so I never do and never have, which sucks. This is how most people make friends as adults.

Molly is back home now. At her apartment, she and Issa are preparing floral arrangements for Molly's parents' vow renewal. Issa can't make it because she has a "work retreat." Daniel texts, and off the look on Issa's face, Molly inquires about it. Issa tries to play it off, but Molly knows this is not nothing. "Daniel and I have history, but we always bounce back." Molly is skeptical that either of them can do this without catching feelings, but Issa insists none of that is on her agenda right now: she has Daniel, "Neighbor Bae," and a Latino man she is going out with that night.

Meanwhile, at jury duty, Lawrence gets a text from Derek inviting him to his birthday party. Lawrence hesitates, assuming Issa will be there, but agrees to go. Bored, he scrolls through his facebook and happens across a photo from the night of the Kiss and Grind party; apparently Kelli's pic accidentallycaught Issa smiling and chatting with Daniel in the background.

Now that is a stroke of bad luck. Lawrence is so distracted by this news he barely hears them call him for briefing.

Back at the We Got Y'all offices, the supervisor is expositing that they have a director position open. Naturally the overeager white dude thinks this is his time to shine. They are going to be having a retreat Saturday morning and wants everyone to partner up. Issa looks over at Frieda who awkwardly looks away. Issa decides to brush it off, but when she whispers a joke and Frieda continues to look uncomfortable, the smile slides off Issa's face.

She follows Frieda to the breakroom, asking to talk. Frieda tensely explains that she isn't comfortable with what's happening at the school, but Issa still doesn't see a problem. This was around the time I started to think Issa was in the wrong the first time I saw this season... not because Issa is siding with bigotry but because she doesn't know better than to talk frankly about racism with whites in the workplace. That fact that Issa was so clueless as to be straightforward with a Clueless White Person on the thing that they fear most - an issue concerning race where they may be even indirectly accused of being a GASP racist - just sort of underlined for me that she was compounding a wrong instead of fixing it. "It must be nice to have the privilege to choose to be upset over this," Issa says, and the fact that she doesn't back down lets Frieda get the moral high ground.

Inglewood. Molly is at her parents' place unloading flowers for the renewal. Dro is her childhood next door neighbor and he is there to a.) celebrate Molly's parent's marriage and b.) smooth things over about basically asking her to take part in his open marriage. He asks if she never thought of him like that; "I mean yeah maybe for a minute when you had your colored contacts on," Molly says. Light skints aren't still in style anymore are they? Exoticals for men is always kind of a weird area, I think.

Molly says she's thought about it, but the marriage thing "is just not how" she sees her life. Dro is cool with that and they agree to stay friends, ribbing each other like only childhood friends can do.

Jury Duty. There's black woman who answers a question about "bias against police" by standing up to reveal her Black Lives Matter t-shirt that I'm unclear whether or not she meant it or just wanted to get out of jury duty. "Not buying it," the judge says, but the juror is dismissed. Lawrence is scrolling through Daniel's gram while all this happens.

Back at Molly's, her mom is saying something about the dollar store champagne flutes she bought, and what is with moms and dollar stores? My momma loves her some dollar store home goods. They lightly push Molly, as you do your children, about when she's getting married. Mom wants to know what's the hold up but Dad knows Molly isn't going to settle. Apparently Molly has a brother, or two brothers, or a gay brother, I'm unclear. I think one of them is famous for something or other though.

Date night. Issa shows up at a low lit ambient bar looking for Mexican bae. "Come through, Tinder," she says when she spots him. She's wearing a tight blue dress and a TWA. Mexican bae seems like he's in his late 30s. Issa's inner monologue horndogs about horchata. Bruh, rumchata is delicious. I haven't managed to buy it myself yet because that shit costs like 20$ but it tastes just like Christmas. And like, really good bread pudding. I should try to buy it at least for the holidays. Anyway, Issa is fantasizing about boning him right on the bar.

We know he's a good guy because he says isn't a martini guy and they joke about comics. I can't with how comic book lore has taken over American entertainment. I liked the Tobey Maguire Spider Mans but now there's like 18 in-universe comic book shows on TV and like four comic book movies at any given time... I honestly thought the comic book thing would have faded a long time ago by now and we'd be back to some other mythical fan lore like angels and ghosts again. (Zombie lore is still popular, and I think vampire lore is still hanging ten, so we need to go to demons or the undead or something.) They eventually move to another table, signifying that the date has lasted a few hours. The waiter brings by the check and Issa does the fake purse grab. You know, I used to adamantly refuse to do that (and the one time I was *asked* to split was by a nerdy black dude I met in a hipster dive who approached me by asking if I was latina - I must emphasize that I do not look latina whatsoever), like even pretend like I was going to pay. Now, I just offer to split. I usually never have to still, which is good, but also, I'm not poor anymore either so. My thing now is taking care to note that the waitress puts the check on the guy's side instead of in the middle - that's when I know the universe wants me to feel good about myself.

Anyway, they have had a good night and Issa is clearly thinking about asking him back to her place. But, we know he's a Good Guy because he says he can't, "but this is an excuse for us to do this again!"

Saturday morning work retreat. There's a generic snack bar set up. Issa is texting with Daniel, after canceling on him because of her date the previous night. Anyway the work team does a boring team building exercise so that the Clueless White People can make Clueless White People assumptions about the kind of trouble kids might be having at home. Issa and Frieda take a few passive aggressive jabs at each other and when it's time to pair up Frieda quickly finds someone else, leaving Issa stuck with Sujata Day. I don't know if she's supposed to be Indian in this one.

Vow Renewal. Apparently Molly decided to invite Sterling K Brown who is wearing a crazy colorful suit like only a person whose body has been altered to look good in Hollywood could do:

Molly's wig actually does look good, don't mind the screenshot. Dro and his parents show up (his dad is latino, his mom is ambiguous brown). Dro hangs around as his parents walk off and Sterling K Brown possessively wraps an arm around Molly, who introduces them. Just so you know that this is going on:

Do y'all take notice of stuff like this or no? Men, even men who are supposedly friends with each other, I find pull rank like this in front of women all the time. I was seeing a guy and one night we were hanging out with his roommate. They went outside to smoke and I tagged along. My dude and I were sharing his cigarette (I don't smoke but I find this sort of thing cute) and the other guy offered me his. My dude didn't think anything of it, but it's little shit like that that always feels like to me men are playing ego games with each other and/or always prepared to slide in the DMs of someone else's girl. (I also tend to think everyone is hitting on me, so that bias tends to reinterpret things.) But, it's the subtlety. And I think if more people paid attention they'd notice things like this more often. At any rate, Sterling K Brown is clearly glad to be there with Molly and possibly senses that Dro is a threat. They all play polite and it's only mildly awkward.

At a bar across town, Lawrence is having drinks with Derek and grilling him for information about Issa and Daniel. Ha. That's way more straightforward than he usually is when he talks to Chad. Derek says that after Tasha, he and Tiffany had to stop discussing them because they always took sides. Lawrence is preoccupied and insecure about Issa seeing Daniel now... maybe she had been seeing him the entire time? Derek says Issa is too dorky to be sneaky. "That's exactly why you wouldn't expect it," Lawrence says. He clearly is reiminaging their entire relationship and second guessing what he thought it was.

"Honestly... this ain't all on Issa," Derek says. "You spent two years unemployed, not doing shit, letting your woman take care of you. Kinda left the door open." Lawrence does that thing of rotating his jaw and accepts this silently. He tries to say it doesn't justify cheating, but Derek says he understands why she would be attracted to someone who could make things happen.

Vow renewal. Molly's brother or whatever asks "is that you?" and HA! Haven't heard that in ages. "So it's a pity date?" he asks. Molly lists off his positive qualities and how she wants to give it a shot. Her brother says just because she dates a good guy that doesn't translate into a relationship. Her brother (no, her brother's best friend) apparently is married to a stripper that trapped him. He tells Molly if she isn't feeling him she shouldn't date him. And because Molly has no understanding of what she wants out of a relationship or from men generally, this is the point where she no longer understands if she should be on a date with Sterling K Brown. He doesn't deserve this.

Bathroom. Issa calls her brother to check whether or not she might be in the wrong with the situation with Frieda. Check out this gloriously dressed fashion forward ass nigga:

Issa's brother doesn't tell her what she wants to hear so she hangs up in his face. To make herself feel better, she responds to a random sext from Neighbor Bae, sending back a nude before she gets busted by Mrs. Frizzle. Issa, at least go into the stall.

Molly is partially hosting this party, so she goes to greet a couple of great aunts. As nosy older black women, they immediately start inquiring about the delicious slice of man she chose to parade around this family event. Which... if you're not sure if you want to date a guy, don't fucking bring him to a parent-centered family event maybe. The aunts start talking about how amazing it is that Molly's parent's marriage lasted 35 years "after what he put my sister through." This is news to Molly.

Issa is texting at a red light when she misses it turn green. A "Potential Bae" sends her a dick pic and she rear ends the car in front of her. This is where I stopped being on Issa's team. No woman, no self possessed black woman, has any business being so distracted by dick she would open herself up to litigation, the loss of transportation, and unspecified auto repair. Like, I can no longer abide this level of thirst. This was when Issa went too far. Also, I spared you a screenshot of the dick pic.

Back that the renewal, Molly is grilling her brother about the state of her parents' marriage. It turns out that Dad cheated on Mom and "they worked through it." Molly seems almost more offended that her mom put up with it than her dad cheated at all. And this is the part where Yvonne Orji had to do an emotional scene. And it was so bad it threatened to diminish my enjoyment of the rest of the series so what you need to know is: 1. the acting here is really really bad, so bad I don't know how they didn't insist on more takes and/or cut away often enough so that you didn't notice how bad it was and b. Molly can't deal with the reality that there is no such thing as a fairy tale relationship. Not all relationships have cheating but a fuckton of them do, so everyone needs to just chill. Also, remind me at a later date to tell you about how I recently found out a guy I had been seeing was married and his wife had their first kid earlier this year. It was fucking horrid. (This is not an endorsement from the "All Men Cheat" school of logic as I, personally, have never been cheated on in a relationship.)

Sterling K Brown tries to console Molly but she stomps away, leaving Dro to chase after her. Bitch move. Molly's being an asshole all around. Bitch, how are you whining about relationships when you left your fucking date at a party at your parents' house to leave with another dude? Molly is way out of line here, and her behavior deserves no sympathy at all.

Issa calls Daniel to let him know she can't make it tonight because she got into a car accident. He offers to pick her up. She tries to beg off but he insists, and his caring and eagerness to help is good to see. One of the worst things about being an introverted holier than thou asshole is that whenever I need help, it always hits me really hard that I really have no one to call.

Meanwhile, this is Lawrence's Saturday night:

GOD those are the worst, lol. He sits there ruminating for awhile and finally defriends. "I don't wanna see this shit," Lawrence thinks.

Dro is driving Molly home. So... she just gone leave her car (and her date) in the interests of her thirst or what? Because I'm not buying that she's so distraught she just needed to get home despite the common decency of leaving on no notice like that. You wanted to provoke Dro's dick and we all know it. No smoothing over on this ridiculous behavior, Molly. She continues being all "distraught," and while I have to offer points for the damsel and distress routine in principle, I believe in polite society more, so be thirsty on your own time, not when it inconveniences or hurts someone else. Molly laments how she spends all her time trying to find someone like her dad only to find out their marriage is bullshit. I suppose if I had grown up in a married two parent household it would come as news to me, too, that parents can be just as ain't shit as anyone else. Still. I find this childish. Dro lends a sympathetic ear and Molly eats it up.

Daniel shows up to pick up Issa and gives her a hug in reassurance since she's just been in a car accident. Instead of abiding this silently where even if she doesn't want it she can use it to her advantage at a later date, Issa decides to be clear that Daniel knows they are not dating only each other and are both seeing other people. Issa isn't sure if she was as up front about that as she should have been the last time they slept together. Daniel reacts disappointedly in a way that telegraphs he did not know that was what they were doing. On the other hand, I feel like men pull this shit a lot and maybe it was good for him to know he isn't the only fish in her pond. Idk. On this issue I have erred toward casual probably more often than I should have, to regretful effects, so for me the jury is out on that.

Dro walks Molly to her door and her building is so lovely. Oh, it turns out Dro drove Molly's car home. That kinda makes it even more shitty that she left Sterling K Brown? When Dro goes to leave, because we must be overtly aware of the stupid and ridiculous choices they make, she pulls him back and kisses him. Then we cut to them boning a second later. Excellent sex scene. Extremely poor choice.

#insecure hbo #issa rae

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insecure-hbo-the-recaps · 7 years

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hella shook

Previously: Issa wanted to get a roster going. Molly for some reason didn’t know what it was about Sterling K Brown. Dro’s marriage was open. Lawrence was used as a prop for a racist threesome. He lied about it. Issa and Daniel made amends.

Issa’s in traffic in her fairly new model car I might add. She is on her phone at every red light and doesn’t notice that she’s on E. She’s wearing a black and white cookie coat, look at this:

Ees! Jesus. She stops at exactly 9:45 cents because she’s poor. She finally makes it to her destination, serving up a “special delivery, sir” for Daniel. They awkwardly joke about how silly she’s being and he opens the door with a smug smile. They’re very attuned and cute and happy and whatnot.

Hey! They got honeycomb towers in LA too, apparently. Unless this is a scene where Molly is skyping with Quintin in Chicago, which the immediate shot of an L lets me know it is. See?

God I fucking love my city. That’s the green line by the way. (If you’re not familiar with Chicago, this is what I mean by “honeycomb towers”:)

They’re downtown near State and Kinzie, where I once went out with a professor from Boston who I thought looked like Mark Zuckerberg. (Public House is the bar there.) We watched the world series where the red sox won that year and it had been such a fun date, I was really disappointed when I never heard from him again. Oh well - in hindsight whatever I wore is probably not something I would wear now.

Molly is actually in Chicago this time, and Quintin is helping her keep the associates straight. He’s wearing a tan vest and Malcolm X glasses and is it this show or somewhere else where they make jokes about a preacher body? Because good grief if I don’t think of an old timey Civil Rights Movement era preacher every time I see him, lol. Molly points out there’s a lot of black people at this office, and Quintin says he doesn’t understand how she could work in the LA office; it reminds him of why he went to Howard.

Quintin asks whether Molly has said anything about her pay inequality but Molly hasn’t. He asks why she isn’t considering leaving, because their firm is not the only fish in the sea. Obviously this has never occurred to Molly. It’s like she gets blinders on about certain things she thinks are acceptable or that she should want or be doing, and is incapable of considering any options outside of that. Apparently Molly is stuck in a sunken cost fallacy, which means you end up sticking out a situation that has long since expired just because you’ve already invested so much time into it already. Quintin encouages her to consider her options. Oh, there’s the “pastor’s body” joke. He really does look like a pastor.

Back in LA, Issa is getting dressed while Daniel is still in bed watching Due North. He asks whether she has plans the next night, but Issa demurs, unsure of his intentions. Daniel’s body is insane.

Elsewhere, Lawrence is on a run with his coworkers, the blonde and Arpana. He won’t be at work the next day because he has jury duty. Another coworker shows up and we get the exposition that they are training for a marathon. I know people hang out with their coworkers like this but I am antisocial and weird so I never do and never have, which sucks. This is how most people make friends as adults.

Molly is back home now. At her apartment, she and Issa are preparing floral arrangements for Molly’s parents’ vow renewal. Issa can’t make it because she has a “work retreat.” Daniel texts, and off the look on Issa’s face, Molly inquires about it. Issa tries to play it off, but Molly knows this is not nothing. “Daniel and I have history, but we always bounce back.” Molly is skeptical that either of them can do this without catching feelings, but Issa insists none of that is on her agenda right now: she has Daniel, “Neighbor Bae,” and a Latino man she is going out with that night.

Meanwhile, at jury duty, Lawrence gets a text from Derek inviting him to his birthday party. Lawrence hesitates, assuming Issa will be there, but agrees to go. Bored, he scrolls through his facebook and happens across a photo from the night of the Kiss and Grind party; apparently Kelli’s pic accidentallycaught Issa smiling and chatting with Daniel in the background.

Now that is a stroke of bad luck. Lawrence is so distracted by this news he barely hears them call him for briefing.

She follows Frieda to the breakroom, asking to talk. Frieda tensely explains that she isn’t comfortable with what’s happening at the school, but Issa still doesn’t see a problem. This was around the time I started to think Issa was in the wrong the first time I saw this season… not because Issa is siding with bigotry but because she doesn’t know better than to talk frankly about racism with whites in the workplace. That fact that Issa was so clueless as to be straightforward with a Clueless White Person on the thing that they fear most - an issue concerning race where they may be even indirectly accused of being a GASP racist - just sort of underlined for me that she was compounding a wrong instead of fixing it. “It must be nice to have the privilege to choose to be upset over this,” Issa says, and the fact that she doesn’t back down lets Frieda get the moral high ground.

Inglewood. Molly is at her parents’ place unloading flowers for the renewal. Dro is her childhood next door neighbor and he is there to a.) celebrate Molly’s parent’s marriage and b.) smooth things over about basically asking her to take part in his open marriage. He asks if she never thought of him like that; “I mean yeah maybe for a minute when you had your colored contacts on,” Molly says. Light skints aren’t still in style anymore are they? Exoticals for men is always kind of a weird area, I think.

Molly says she’s thought about it, but the marriage thing “is just not how” she sees her life. Dro is cool with that and they agree to stay friends, ribbing each other like only childhood friends can do.

Jury Duty. There’s black woman who answers a question about “bias against police” by standing up to reveal her Black Lives Matter t-shirt that I’m unclear whether or not she meant it or just wanted to get out of jury duty. “Not buying it,” the judge says, but the juror is dismissed. Lawrence is scrolling through Daniel’s gram while all this happens.

Back at Molly’s, her mom is saying something about the dollar store champagne flutes she bought, and what is with moms and dollar stores? My momma loves her some dollar store home goods. They lightly push Molly, as you do your children, about when she’s getting married. Mom wants to know what’s the hold up but Dad knows Molly isn’t going to settle. Apparently Molly has a brother, or two brothers, or a gay brother, I’m unclear. I think one of them is famous for something or other though.

Date night. Issa shows up at a low lit ambient bar looking for Mexican bae. “Come through, Tinder,” she says when she spots him. She’s wearing a tight blue dress and a TWA. Mexican bae seems like he’s in his late 30s. Issa’s inner monologue horndogs about horchata. Bruh, rumchata is delicious. I haven’t managed to buy it myself yet because that shit costs like 20$ but it tastes just like Christmas. And like, really good bread pudding. I should try to buy it at least for the holidays. Anyway, Issa is fantasizing about boning him right on the bar.

We know he’s a good guy because he says isn’t a martini guy and they joke about comics. I can’t with how comic book lore has taken over American entertainment. I liked the Tobey Maguire Spider Mans but now there’s like 18 in-universe comic book shows on TV and like four comic book movies at any given time… I honestly thought the comic book thing would have faded a long time ago by now and we’d be back to some other mythical fan lore like angels and ghosts again. (Zombie lore is still popular, and I think vampire lore is still hanging ten, so we need to go to demons or the undead or something.) They eventually move to another table, signifying that the date has lasted a few hours. The waiter brings by the check and Issa does the fake purse grab. You know, I used to adamantly refuse to do that (and the one time I was *asked* to split was by a nerdy black dude I met in a hipster dive who approached me by asking if I was latina - I must emphasize that I do not look latina whatsoever), like even pretend like I was going to pay. Now, I just offer to split. I usually never have to still, which is good, but also, I’m not poor anymore either so. My thing now is taking care to note that the waitress puts the check on the guy’s side instead of in the middle - that’s when I know the universe wants me to feel good about myself.

Anyway, they have had a good night and Issa is clearly thinking about asking him back to her place. But, we know he’s a Good Guy because he says he can’t, “but this is an excuse for us to do this again!”

Saturday morning work retreat. There’s a generic snack bar set up. Issa is texting with Daniel, after canceling on him because of her date the previous night. Anyway the work team does a boring team building exercise so that the Clueless White People can make Clueless White People assumptions about the kind of trouble kids might be having at home. Issa and Frieda take a few passive aggressive jabs at each other and when it’s time to pair up Frieda quickly finds someone else, leaving Issa stuck with Sujata Day. I don’t know if she’s supposed to be Indian in this one.

Vow Renewal. Apparently Molly decided to invite Sterling K Brown who is wearing a crazy colorful suit like only a person whose body has been altered to look good in Hollywood could do:

Molly’s wig actually does look good, don’t mind the screenshot. Dro and his parents show up (his dad is latino, his mom is ambiguous brown). Dro hangs around as his parents walk off and Sterling K Brown possessively wraps an arm around Molly, who introduces them. Just so you know that this is going on:

Do y'all take notice of stuff like this or no? Men, even men who are supposedly friends with each other, I find pull rank like this in front of women all the time. I was seeing a guy and one night we were hanging out with his roommate. They went outside to smoke and I tagged along. My dude and I were sharing his cigarette (I don’t smoke but I find this sort of thing cute) and the other guy offered me his. My dude didn’t think anything of it, but it’s little shit like that that always feels like to me men are playing ego games with each other and/or always prepared to slide in the DMs of someone else’s girl. (I also tend to think everyone is hitting on me, so that bias tends to reinterpret things.) But, it’s the subtlety. And I think if more people paid attention they’d notice things like this more often. At any rate, Sterling K Brown is clearly glad to be there with Molly and possibly senses that Dro is a threat. They all play polite and it’s only mildly awkward.

At a bar across town, Lawrence is having drinks with Derek and grilling him for information about Issa and Daniel. Ha. That’s way more straightforward than he usually is when he talks to Chad. Derek says that after Tasha, he and Tiffany had to stop discussing them because they always took sides. Lawrence is preoccupied and insecure about Issa seeing Daniel now… maybe she had been seeing him the entire time? Derek says Issa is too dorky to be sneaky. “That’s exactly why you wouldn’t expect it,” Lawrence says. He clearly is reiminaging their entire relationship and second guessing what he thought it was.

“Honestly… this ain’t all on Issa,” Derek says. “You spent two years unemployed, not doing shit, letting your woman take care of you. Kinda left the door open.” Lawrence does that thing of rotating his jaw and accepts this silently. He tries to say it doesn’t justify cheating, but Derek says he understands why she would be attracted to someone who could make things happen.

Vow renewal. Molly’s brother or whatever asks “is that you?” and HA! Haven’t heard that in ages. “So it’s a pity date?” he asks. Molly lists off his positive qualities and how she wants to give it a shot. Her brother says just because she dates a good guy that doesn’t translate into a relationship. Her brother (no, her brother’s best friend) apparently is married to a stripper that trapped him. He tells Molly if she isn’t feeling him she shouldn’t date him. And because Molly has no understanding of what she wants out of a relationship or from men generally, this is the point where she no longer understands if she should be on a date with Sterling K Brown. He doesn’t deserve this.

Bathroom. Issa calls her brother to check whether or not she might be in the wrong with the situation with Frieda. Check out this gloriously dressed fashion forward ass nigga:

Issa’s brother doesn’t tell her what she wants to hear so she hangs up in his face. To make herself feel better, she responds to a random sext from Neighbor Bae, sending back a nude before she gets busted by Mrs. Frizzle. Issa, at least go into the stall.

Molly is partially hosting this party, so she goes to greet a couple of great aunts. As nosy older black women, they immediately start inquiring about the delicious slice of man she chose to parade around this family event. Which… if you’re not sure if you want to date a guy, don’t fucking bring him to a parent-centered family event maybe. The aunts start talking about how amazing it is that Molly’s parent’s marriage lasted 35 years “after what he put my sister through.” This is news to Molly.

Issa is texting at a red light when she misses it turn green. A “Potential Bae” sends her a dick pic and she rear ends the car in front of her. This is where I stopped being on Issa’s team. No woman, no self possessed black woman, has any business being so distracted by dick she would open herself up to litigation, the loss of transportation, and unspecified auto repair. Like, I can no longer abide this level of thirst. This was when Issa went too far. Also, I spared you a screenshot of the dick pic.

Back that the renewal, Molly is grilling her brother about the state of her parents’ marriage. It turns out that Dad cheated on Mom and “they worked through it.” Molly seems almost more offended that her mom put up with it than her dad cheated at all. And this is the part where Yvonne Orji had to do an emotional scene. And it was so bad it threatened to diminish my enjoyment of the rest of the series so what you need to know is: 1. the acting here is really really bad, so bad I don’t know how they didn’t insist on more takes and/or cut away often enough so that you didn’t notice how bad it was and b. Molly can’t deal with the reality that there is no such thing as a fairy tale relationship. Not all relationships have cheating but a fuckton of them do, so everyone needs to just chill. Also, remind me at a later date to tell you about how I recently found out a guy I had been seeing was married and his wife had their first kid earlier this year. It was fucking horrid. (This is not an endorsement from the “All Men Cheat” school of logic as I, personally, have never been cheated on in a relationship.)

Sterling K Brown tries to console Molly but she stomps away, leaving Dro to chase after her. Bitch move. Molly’s being an asshole all around. Bitch, how are you whining about relationships when you left your fucking date at a party at your parents’ house to leave with another dude? Molly is way out of line here, and her behavior deserves no sympathy at all.

Issa calls Daniel to let him know she can’t make it tonight because she got into a car accident. He offers to pick her up. She tries to beg off but he insists, and his caring and eagerness to help is good to see. One of the worst things about being an introverted holier than thou asshole is that whenever I need help, it always hits me really hard that I really have no one to call.

Meanwhile, this is Lawrence’s Saturday night:

GOD those are the worst, lol. He sits there ruminating for awhile and finally defriends. “I don’t wanna see this shit,” Lawrence thinks.

Dro is driving Molly home. So… she just gone leave her car (and her date) in the interests of her thirst or what? Because I’m not buying that she’s so distraught she just needed to get home despite the common decency of leaving on no notice like that. You wanted to provoke Dro’s dick and we all know it. No smoothing over on this ridiculous behavior, Molly. She continues being all “distraught,” and while I have to offer points for the damsel and distress routine in principle, I believe in polite society more, so be thirsty on your own time, not when it inconveniences or hurts someone else. Molly laments how she spends all her time trying to find someone like her dad only to find out their marriage is bullshit. I suppose if I had grown up in a married two parent household it would come as news to me, too, that parents can be just as ain’t shit as anyone else. Still. I find this childish. Dro lends a sympathetic ear and Molly eats it up.

Daniel shows up to pick up Issa and gives her a hug in reassurance since she’s just been in a car accident. Instead of abiding this silently where even if she doesn’t want it she can use it to her advantage at a later date, Issa decides to be clear that Daniel knows they are not dating only each other and are both seeing other people. Issa isn’t sure if she was as up front about that as she should have been the last time they slept together. Daniel reacts disappointedly in a way that telegraphs he did not know that was what they were doing. On the other hand, I feel like men pull this shit a lot and maybe it was good for him to know he isn’t the only fish in her pond. Idk. On this issue I have erred toward casual probably more often than I should have, to regretful effects, so for me the jury is out on that.

Dro walks Molly to her door and her building is so lovely. Oh, it turns out Dro drove Molly’s car home. That kinda makes it even more shitty that she left Sterling K Brown? When Dro goes to leave, because we must be overtly aware of the stupid and ridiculous choices they make, she pulls him back and kisses him. Then we cut to them boning a second later. Excellent sex scene. Extremely poor choice.

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snaylzntaylz · 6 years

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Wow wow wow! Just more clear proof Hillary Clinton is psychotic! I hate Trump, but Clinton would have been at the last equally as bad, if not 10x plus worse! She's a monster. A sociopathic, psychotic, narcissistic bitch, and she's no patriot. She's a traitor. She's continued the ongoing destruction of any sort of decent reputation we might have had left with the rest of the world. She's vindictive, crazy, and a war-mongering, ignoramus. She's a Soros-puppet who puts no value on human life. She's also racist, closet-lesbian who argued publicly for marriages to be solely between men and women because that's what she thought her target voters wanted to hear. She tells everyone what she thinks they want to hear, and goes behind their backs and backslides on her own statements or self-proclaimed bullshit convictions when meeting with others who disagree with what she's already gone on-record as having standing. She's two-faced, or multi-faced, and has already been leaked by her private $$$$$$$$ speeches that she has a public agenda and a private agenda, public opinions and private opinions, public stances and private stances, etc etc. You can get what you pay for with her, as long as it will continue to benefit her. Many people from her early career years go so far as to say that she hates children and never wanted any and only had Chelsea because it was their best chance of getting elected as a wholesome looking family. Their marriage is even more of a business agreement/arrangement than a marriage of love or religion. They raised Chelsea to be a ruthless legal-loophole-trained, politician-speaking, social-engineering, like-mother-like-daughter mirror image of the evil between the two of them. Have you ever listened to Chelsea talk about how she was raised and the games and quizzes they would pay with her as a child? Is totally demented and unnatural! Not only must we be careful to never direct any Clinton to any position of control ever again, but we musty also pay close attention to anyone and everyone they've ever had any substantial contact with and not to elect them or allow them to rise to power at any level either. Because Hilary, Bill, and Chelsea Clinton are all well-trained professionals of evil and they are all master manipulators and con men/con women. Anyone they've had the chance to influence or socially engineer you better bet they have or have tried to. They've socially engineered mass members of our society while they were in the White House. It so take generations of pushing them out of contact with entire societies, charities, and people in power before we can even begin to regain a smidgen of control and unravel the mess they've weaved of this country and others. By others, I mean like what Hilary has done to Libya and countries like it, what she convinced Bill to do while he was President, what they all did to Haiti and continue to do to poor countries with their scam of a charity foundation. Many White House insiders from the Clinton Era, including secret service agents sworn to protect and lay down their lives for them have come out in recent years publicly and in books describing how much control Hillary had during Bill Clinton's presidency, how she made most of the decisions for him, she "wore the pants" (or at least the pantsuit) in the marriage, she ran the show, she was abusive, controlling, and manipulative. Read the books these former secret service agents have written. They are astonishing to people who think Hillary is such a strong, wholesome, family woman. Strong surely, but not in any good ways! Christian woman? Ha! Highly doubtful! Hillary didn't stay with Bill when he cheated on her because she lived him so much or for religious reasons or anything of the sort. She stayed with him for the same reason she always has. He's always cheated on her. He's been her ticket into ruling over people. She doesn't love him,she's not in love with him, she could care less for him other than what being married to him can do for her. She prefers underage girls sexually, and she doesn't give a shit about any women's rights but her own. She doesn't care if women are raped or children are molested or raped either, according to multiple reports and a few victims themselves, she's raped and molested underage girls herself. One person has even claimed that she's a cannibal and has had people that she felt have crossed her murdered and has consumed and served up at least one of her victims to her friends and had some for herself. It's a sick world the elite live. Difficult for the majority of us to comprehend in any way. Especially when it seems so unrealistic and conspiracy-theory-like to hear these things. But just look at how many of their friends and colleagues are now being proven of being involved child sex slave rings and other sick, dark things. Do you think they really didn't know or partake? There is almost an entire police force worth of former Arkansas policemen who worked during Bill's office-holding of governor in Arkansas who all of them claim he had multiple girlfriends, did a lot of cocaine, and told them that Hillary was a lesbian. He's told them that he didn't want her to catch him and asked them to cover for him because she would get mad at him if he mucked up their chances to rule. She just wanted to rule through him, knowing how hard it was for a female to get elected. She ran the show behind the scenes to get him into offices of power so she could assume the throne behind closed doors. She's already been the United States President once, the public just never knew it. He wants recognition and she wants money, power, and recognition. That's what their marriage and family arrangement is. She never cared what drugs he did of who he slept with as long as he didn't get caught and ruin their political careers. She was constantly threatening and blackmailing women he has slept with in order to keep them quiet. She has even thanked some of them for keeping him satisfied in that area so she didn't have to, while simultaneously threatening them to keep their mouths shut about it. When they got into the White House, they pulled records on everyone they ever knew so they could blackmail anyone they needed to at anytime and anyone they didn't have dirt on our didn't have enough dirt on, they had them followed or framed to create either dirt on them or to have them arrested and ruin their lives. Any woman (or man) who refused to go along with Hillary's evil threats she made an example of and had them framed for crimes they didn't commit to ruin their lives, take away their freedoms, kill any/all credibility they might have had, establish motive of retaliation should they try to pursue anything against them, and made an example out of them- should anyone else think of disobeying her. Or, if timing was a problem and she had someone she trusted that was willing to do her dirty work, she'd just have them murdered, often after trying to make them appear insane or drive them to true insanity in an attempt to get them to commit suicide. Then she'd work hard to have their murders declared as suicides or frame another enemy in a homicide. She's ruthless, viscous, vindictive, terrifying, and scandalous! If all of this is true, and by as many witnesses as there are, it's hard not to believe all these people, most of which have everything to lose and absolutely nothing to gain by saying so, them Mrs Clinton might just be the most evil woman alive and perhaps the most evil woman of the century. The question is, will she go down in history as the evil beast that everyone who knows her says she really is? Or will she go down in history as the former First Lady who almost became the first woman President? I hope I'm wrong, I hope all these people are liars, I hope no woman, especially one that almost became or leader, is that awful of a human being. But if even some of these things are truthful, she's still sinful as all hell. In fact, even if none of this true, what we already know about her as public record is evil enough to have never considered her for president of our country! What she did in Benghazi, despicable! The emails, omg! The lying, deceit, lack of remorse/lack of empathy, lack of responsibility, etc. The ignorance, the rallying for bills promote the school-prison pipeline in black communities, the fraud, there's so many things. And what she and her DNC did to Bernie Sanders was inconceivable! So unforgivable that is likely the real reason she lost the election. Had she beaten Bernie fair and square and not stolen the primary, she might have had the majority of Bernie voters. But because the fraud was so obvious, the theft so in-your-face and I-don't-care, many Bernie voters voted for Trump, Stein, or didn't vote at all just to show Clinton and the DNC that our votes DO matter and if they won't count them in the primary then they won't get them in the general. She still got a lot of Bernie votes in the vegetal because so many people feared a Trump presidency, but it still wasn't enough. Her rallies had little-to-zero attending in most areas and when that happened the media faked them or used camera tricks to make them look packed. Bernie was drawing bigger crowds than Clinton and Trump combined everywhere he went! The DNC and Clintons various political groups tried to sabotage him repeatedly. The most successful they were before the total takeover of the DNC locking Venue delegates out and turning off the lights and sound where Bernie supporters were designated to sit, creating riots and protests outside, having the Media on her side, etc was when they got Black Lives Matter to take his microphone and take over his rally and put him in an extremely awkward position. Bernie was the ONLY politician who stood a chance to help the Black Lives Matter platform with sincerity, it turns out the crazy ladies who did that to Bernie didn't even have any authority within the movement to represent them like that and it ruined the Black Lives Matter movement in the process by wiring against it's own best interest, proving it too was a scam. A Clinton-Soros created/backed scam/sham created to cause more division among our society and part of a ploy to ruin Trump's chances. Trump is whole other conspiracy story in itself too. And I bet he and Melania are through, if she can hold on until he's no longer in office. She can't stand his lying, cheating, ignorant ass anymore and is so obvious it hurts! Maybe I've been misinformed on multiple fronts, and maybe most of what I've said are based on multiple liars, but that doesn't change the facts and the facts lead me to the same conclusions all the same. I just wish everyone saw it too. People just don't last attention or investigate anymore. They don't listen. They think they know what they think they know and they plug their ears and start running their mouths and never learn what might hurt them. I'm willing to learn. I'm open to bring proved wrong. At least proving me wrong requires others to see what I have seen and decide why they don't believe what I chose to consider as truth. I state multiple times thriving this post I could be wrong, misinformed, uninformed, etc. But some facts are facts and are public knowledge, undisputed, and as I've said before, those facts alone are enough to stand by my decision to despise the Clinton family, the DNC, Trump, and our political process. Period.

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thetwitchreport-blog · 7 years

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Why I believe that all terrorist attacks in the last 20 years are a false flag upon the west.

The West and its Military Industrial Complex (MIC) has been meddling in the middle east for around about a century now. You can argue that it has been since the crusades but that would just lead to digression. I want to concentrate on what the MIC of the modern era, leading in to the information era, has done and are continuing to do.

The MIC is made from a blend of government institutions and the NGOs (Non-Government Organisations) that supply the arms for the worlds militaries. This system ensures that going to war lines the pockets for the fat cats that run these institutions. So, there was and still is a vested interest in controlling the popular opinion.

After World War 1 it was clear that technology was on a very steep progression curve and along with it was the dawn of psychological warfare. This is clear when, during the peace talks in France after WW1, the president of the United States Woodrow Wilson took Edward Bernays with him for the entire duration. Bernays, the nephew to the Austrian neurologist, and founder of psychoanalysis Sigmund Freud, was a pioneer in public relations. He later went on to write the book ‘Propaganda’, which is still used today by military forces all over the planet. Before this point, propaganda was only used during war time, but Bernays wanted to use propaganda to sway people’s opinions during times of peace as well.

We are now about a decade into the Information Era. Let that sink in for a second……….. This is the beginning of a new era. The internet has changed the game completely in nearly every facet of life from ordering food to communication, shopping, exercise, manufacturing, production and most of all, warfare! The internet is connecting more and more people globally and we can freely exchange immense amounts of information amongst ourselves. Humanity has never had a time in its history where these amounts information can be accessed so easily and freely. The only thing that is remotely comparable to it in history is the great Library of Alexandria, and you had to be a special breed of human to have access to that amount knowledge in those days. You couldn’t just roll in off the street with your library card and check out the great works of Socrates for a couple of weeks and get clued up on modern western philosophy at the time. You had to be an esteemed member of society, as information, knowledge and wisdom was considered a dangerous tool in the wrong hands.

Now we have access to all this information and we struggle to process it all in a coherent manner. This, mixed with the barrage of psychological warfare from the MIC makes it very hard to determine what is really going on in the world.

The west has spent the last 30 years destabilising the middle east for various reasons. For years, the MIC has shoved down our collective throats via the mainstream media (MSM) that our forces are over there to stop inhumane dictators or weapons of mass destruction. I do not doubt any of these reasons to be true at all. In fact, I think we are over there for all the above reasons, and reasons the power structures don’t want us to know about. If you have a stake in the MIC, you would be welcoming as many reasons to go war as possible. Wars create guns, ammo and equipment contracts for the MIC!

Decades of war and destabilisation have created a vast amount of collateral damage. Cities have been destroyed and hundreds of thousands of people have had their lives completely devastated from these conflicts. It has led to a massive refugee problem which ultimately pulls on the heart strings of any empathetic individual.

Everyone knows that sending more troops to the middle east is only going to exacerbate the situation further. It was only after a gas attack in Syria in the summer of 2013 that the UK stood up for the first time in around 80 years and said we are not following the USA/UN in to another middle eastern conflict. This, in my opinion, is the result of the information we have access to via the internet. Judging from this historical event it seems that the public can no longer be convinced that violence puts an end to violence. Therefore, the MIC needed to step up their game. If the MIC cannot gain contracts from wars overseas, then they will turn inwards and look towards our homelands for contracts. And so, the rise of the Police State! It is clearly evident when you look at the military gear the police are equipped with these days. The local bobby on the beat is now equipped with an extensive amount of weaponry from pepper spray to tasers, video cameras, stab vests etc. This is not even taking in to account the military style vehicles they have at their disposal which is quite frankly, terrifying!

I am a 33 year old man living in the south of England, in a relatively quiet seaside town. I feel that trust in our government is practically non-existent from the local people of my generation, as well as the majority of older and younger generations. Ask the next 5 people you see if they trust their current government and any other government that is to potentially be elected in the next decade. I would imagine that at the least 4 out of 5 people will say they have zero trust. So, put yourself in the position on a refugee who has had their life turned upside down and thrown in to the cement mixer for most of their existence. If western natives feel resentment for our current power structure, what do you think people from the middle east think about us?

This is where I think the conspiracy lies…….I think the MIC knows what they are doing. They pushed the forming of the European union to gain control of European nations’ borders. They know that as a world society we are not falling for their lies about weapons of mass destruction and any other bullshit excuse that they may use to encourage us to accept more wars. Instead they are opening the borders and letting in the people who have been obliterated by the onslaught over the years. Of course they hate the fundamental structure of our society! If the tables were reversed we would all feel the same. The continuous need for military tools and weaponry suits the MIC just fine.

Knowing this, it would be absolute insanity to assume there will not be lone wolf and extremist groups operating independently in amongst the refugee population. It’s evident that this is the source of most of the attacks in Europe over the last few years. Pointing out the common denominator in these attacks as being radical Islamists does not make you a racist or a bigot or any other of these lovely exhausted buzz words people use nowadays. Pointing out the truth is not always easy. Telling your wife she doesn’t look good in the outfit she is wearing is always going to end in a hard time. Jumping down somebody’s throat and calling them a nazi or a fascist for pointing out that these attacks are coming from the same people, from the same area of the world is just illogical. It’s a low resolution way of thinking and I am proud that here in the west we have such a thing as free speech. It enables us to communicate freely, and openly discuss sensitive subjects. Real progress has always followed free and open, unhindered conversation.

I personally believe the MIC are the real war mongers of this world and they are playing the masses against each other, whilst simultaneously dismantling middle eastern and western societies. Classic divide and conquer! It is akin to how the Spanish conquered the Incas with only minimal amount of troops (mostly cavalry). In short, they played Inca tribes against one another, gradually reducing their overall numbers down to a manageable size to attack on their own. The concept of divide and conquer was first discussed in Sun Tzu’s book The Art Of War, which I encourage everybody to read at some point. They have turned their propaganda and psychological warfare inwards on the west. This is an attempt to enable the continuation of the MIC, and if that means smashing western ideals up against middle eastern ideals to create scenarios where the MIC is needed, then that is what they will do. You have to break a few eggs to make an omelette! It will continue for as long as money can manipulate politicians. It will continue if people don’t get on board with the era of information. It will continue if people just look at the internet as a place where you can show pictures of your cat in a box or what you had for lunch, instead of extracting the valuable information you need to make a coherent analysis of the geopolitical spectrum. The internet is the greatest tool humans have ever created and I advise you to make use of it whilst it is still open and free.

So, I believe that the MIC has committed a false flag attack upon the world to further their agenda in population control, which in turn continues the production of arms and the printing of fiat currency. The attack has been going on for years, and it will continue unless we start being true to ourselves and stop with this knee jerk reaction to just call people names for having a different point of view. Critical thinking, truth and logic need to stand tall above emotions.

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