#pc: fem!edmonton

[randomoranges]

hello, do you like long fics? do you like soft? here is a long soft fic.

so this started off - really, back in february when i was visiting my friends [when that was still allowed - lol] and we were discussing our ocs as we sometimes happen to do. that and how with time they get more ok with more “feminine things” and such.

i made a doodle inspired by that conversation.

then lockdown happened. and with my tablet i decided to digitally colour that doodle. i thought it looked pretty neat. as i looked at it i started to wonder what the “fem versions” of ed and ét would be like and look like and came to the realisation that NO ONE had ever thought of that.

then an entire fucking au was born from that because that’s the way i function, apparently.

i made a few art pieces and started writing this behemoth on april 12th 2020.

i got like 70% done and then stopped. got blocked or just didn’t have the motivation for it.

seeing as i go back to work tomorrow [god dont make me go] and this fic wasn’t done yet, i told myself that this quarantine fic would END NOW.

so i spent the last 3 nights hacking at the remaining 30%.

i could have split it up in parts, i know, but seeing as i suffered through the whole thing in one part so do you :) 

here we go for the genderbend au no one ever even asked for like literally.

evelyn = edward

éliane = étienne

also, how many song lyrics can i fit in one title lamao.

in total this one has more pages than keesha kee taen, but like 1000 less words.

Girl, You Really Got me Now [It’s a Love Story] [[The Ballad of Éliane and Evelyn]]

 Éliane Maisonneuve remembered the exact and precise moment that Evelyn Murphy waltzed into her life. She remembered the exact moment it happened for the simple reason that it changed her life. For the better.

 It happened one glorious day in September, about a week or so after school started, sometime after Labour Day. It was her senior year of high school, the world was sitting in the palm of her hand, and she had been busy recounting her rather exciting weekend to her friends, when their homeroom teacher had walked in, followed by a student. Éliane prided herself with knowing everyone and anyone in the school. Mostly, because she was a social butterfly, also because it helped when one was the vice-president of the student body (president had too many responsibilities, not enough fun). Therefore, she automatically knew that this was a new student.

 It was about as far as her analysis went for her brain stuttered when she got a good look at the new girl, while her teacher introduced her. God, but she was absolutely gorgeous. She had pretty, dark, brown hair cut slightly above her shoulders, a cute little barrette in her hair, the prettiest hazel eyes this side of the world, for sure, and the softest looking skin Éliane had ever seen. Her darker complexion went rather nicely with the colours of the school uniform and there was just something about the way she played with the hem of her sweater that tugged at Éliane’s heart.

 Before her homeroom teacher could even get to the part of asking for a benevolent soul to show her (her name was Evelyn Murphy – her brain had registered that much) around, Éliane had bolted out of her seat, only near tripping on herself to volunteer for the honour. She absolutely needed to become friends with Evelyn. It was a matter of life or death. She knew. Evelyn had offered her the actual cutest little shy smile Éliane had ever seen in her life and she had eagerly told her friend to change seats so that Evelyn could sit next to her.

 Even then, without fully knowing, she was already infatuated.

 Evelyn turned out to be a rather quiet girl. Éliane chalked it up to being new to the school and a little intimidated by it, but she vowed to herself that she would make sure everyone treated Evelyn right. She introduced her to all her friends, made sure she knew where all her classes were and gave Evelyn her phone number and e-mail address in case she had any questions. Éliane declared them friends by the end of lunch and the pretty little blush on Evelyn’s cheeks was a thing of beauty.

 Éliane even went as far as walk Evelyn home, despite her telling her that it was alright and that she knew how to get back, but Éliane wanted to spend more time with her and insisted, figuring she could tell her new friend about the cool hangouts around school (there were three – the dep’, the hamburger shack down the street and the alcove by the river (which was a good place to go make-out, but that was a detail – the rocks there were really cool, it was just a question of no one ratting you out.))

 Éliane, surprisingly, for once, managed not to spend the entire walk to Evelyn’s gabbing away about one thousand different trivialities and instead bombarded the new girl with ten thousand different questions. Luckily, Evelyn took it all in stride and patiently answered her questions. It was how Éliane found out that Evelyn’s father had been transferred and had started a new job here over the summer and how his position had been extended. The rest of her family had then moved over and by the time they were settled and her school papers were in order, school had already started, but here she was now.

 And goodness, here she was now indeed, Éliane thought.

 They became inseparable, fast, mostly due to Éliane doing her utmost best to include Evelyn in absolutely everything she did. Evelyn fit in nicely with Éliane’s group of friends, which was a good thing, otherwise she would have dumped their sorry asses and started a new, better group. But, the others took Evelyn in and Éliane called it a success.

 Éliane was head strong, brash, and impulsive and liked to stick her fingers in as many pies as she could. She liked to keep busy with projects that interested her and she was always ready to try something new. Therefore, even though term had already started, she decided, quite on an impulse, one day, to switch out one of her courses for home-economics, just because Evelyn was in it and had said nice things about it. It was a good thing Éliane was a well liked student by the faculty members and that this change actually made her advanced art program fit better in her schedule , but the secretary still gently scolded her and told her that she would have a lot of catching up to do.

 Luckily, Éliane had a plan.

 Her plan consisted on being her disastrous self in a kitchen and hope that Evelyn would take pity on her and help her out.

 Luckily, Éliane didn’t have to try very hard for her plan to work. During her first assignment, she managed to set the smoke detector off, twice. For the second assignment, she had to be rushed to the nurse’s office after she accidentally sliced her finger open. After the third assignment, she needed ointment for a rather nasty burn. Once the mid-term report cards came out and Evelyn found out Éliane was failing home-economics spectacularly, she took pity on her friend and teamed up with her for the following projects.

 It was a win-win, in Éliane’s opinion, even if she barely scrapped by and the class brought down her overall average, (but she was getting better – it had to count for something, right?)

 Éliane ended up spending a lot of time with Evelyn what with classes, hanging out together and after school extracurricular.  Evelyn ended up joining the theatre club and Éliane nearly lost her mind when she found out her quiet, mostly shy friend could act it out on stage like the best of them. It was a whole new side of her that she had only ever glimpsed and Éliane loved it. The girl had spunk. She was feisty. And slowly, slowly, Evelyn emerged from her shell as she got used to her new school and new surroundings. With time, Éliane got to get to know her better and discovered a treasure trove of other interesting things about her – like her sense of humour, which was dry and cutting and an absolute gift.

 Éliane wondered where Evelyn had been all her life.

 Once Christmas break rolled around, Evelyn’s mood took a dip, since for the first time ever, she would be away from her friends and family. Éliane took it upon herself to make sure her friend wouldn’t feel left out during the holidays and so she organised outings and parties with her and her friends to make sure Evelyn had a good time. The Murphy’s were even invited over for Christmas Eve and Éliane thought it was her greatest accomplishment yet. Throughout the rest of the holiday break, there were many outings to get hot chocolate, tobogganing, but by far, the best surprise came when Éliane suggested they go ice-skating, since the rinks were finally open and she found out that Evelyn could skate really well. Not only that, but the girl had a competitive streak to her as well and it was so very easy to get  her riled up if any type of friendly competition was presented to her. Evelyn had depth and personality and there were so many different sides to her that Éliane loved so much. It seemed that the more she got to know her friend, the more she found out about her and it was great.

 Winter break went by quickly, what with the myriad of activities Éliane orchestrated and it ended with by far, the greatest event to the start off the new year – Evelyn’s birthday.

 Towards the start of the break, Evelyn had quietly invited the inner circle of the friend group for a sleepover on the last Saturday of break, since her birthday fell on a Wednesday. They would be four in total and Éliane spent the better part of her days leading up to her friend’s birthday trying to come up with the Best Gift Ever, when she wasn’t busy spending time with her friends or stuffing her face with her grandmother’s baked goods. She was looking forward to the party and Evelyn kept reminding her that it would be a simple, quiet affair. They would get takeout, there would be cake, they would watch movies, they would eat too much candy and chips and chocolate – and eventually, they would all crash at some ungodly hour of the morning.

 Éliane still thought it sounded like the greatest thing ever.

 The party in itself turned out to be lovely and loud and boisterous. Mr. And Mrs Murphy put on brave faces and stuck around making sure everything was okay and to wish their daughter a happy birthday, while Evelyn’s younger sister had found herself a better place to be. They played games, spent the better part of the evening gossiping about school – their teachers, their classmates, another part worrying about which Cégep to apply to and what program, until Éliane declared that all “no-fun” school talk was banned. So, they watched a stream of movies, one of the other girls gave Evelyn a manicure and they ate too much candy and chips and chocolate.

 Somewhere around midnight, before it got to be too late, they took a break to change into their pyjamas. They were waiting for Evelyn to return and Éliane was waiting on the couch, wearing her own set of teddy bear patterned pyjama pants and long sleeved sweatshirt she had pilfered from one of her brothers (it was large, it was comfortable and it was warm), when Evelyn came to join them.

 Éliane cared very little about what others wore to bed. Normally, she wore boxer shorts and nothing else – unless it was cold outside, which it currently was. The thing was, she would have never associated Evelyn with the pyjama set that she was wearing. Evelyn rejoined their little group as if nothing was wrong with the world and went and plopped herself right next to Éliane wearing by far the most ridiculous (gorgeous), frilly (utterly inappropriate), matching set of what seemed to be lilac silk pyjamas. There was lace. There were motifs. It had little tiny straps that covered her shoulders (Éliane’s brain reminded her that this was the most skin she had seen on her friend and that she could see her clavicle and shoulder blades and the dip of her neck and – and then there were the shorts! The equally silk shorts that hugged her thighs just so and – maybe, maybe it was always really hot at the Murphy’s, which was why Evelyn slept in such a getup, because suddenly, Éliane found herself overheating. And then she had to give her friend one more (discreet – hopefully) one over and of course she had to notice the way the fabric hugged her chest, the shape she could guess underneath and – this really wasn’t fair.

 The thing was – the real issue here was – that Éliane M. Maisonneuve had accidentally gone and developed the stupidest of crushes on Evelyn A. Murphy and she was a complete goner.

 And now her friend was sitting beside her in her silk pyjamas looking like a goddamned gift and Éliane wanted to hold her close, furrow her face in the crook of her neck and ghost her hands over the fabric of her pajamas – and more. She was doomed. This was neither the place nor the time and she did her utmost best to keep her thoughts pure and innocent, but apparently, the universe hated her, because Evelyn slid extremely close to her, until she was half pressed on Éliane’s side and took a hold of her hand.

 “I get really afraid during scary movies,” She whispered in her ear and Éliane tried to suppress the shivers that ran down her spine and the sudden urge she had to turn around and kiss Evelyn’s stupid (beautiful, glorious) face senseless. Instead, she clutched at her friend’s hand in return, didn’t let go for the duration of the movie – and tried her best not to feel anything every time Evelyn gasped and clutched at her a little harder when she got scared. (And she tried really hard not to think of the way Evelyn’s body felt pressed up against her side.)

 Éliane knew what she liked – couldn’t care less about the gender of people. She had dated a little, had stolen kisses from girls behind cafés and had gone out on dates with boys. So long as she was interested, it didn’t matter and, apparently, her mind had decided that it was very interested in Evelyn. (And really, could she be blamed? Evelyn was mighty fine, thank you very much.)

 She was so screwed.

 Éliane swore to herself that she would keep her stupid crush to herself and bury her feelings so far deep inside of her that she would be long dead before they could ever resurface properly.

 Therefore, by Tuesday, over lunch, Éliane took her other best friend, Emma, aside, to spill absolutely everything to her.

 Now, Éliane and Emma had met on the very first day of kindergarten and had been placed in the same class. They had been sat next to each other and Éliane had declared her her best friend by the time lunch had rolled in. Emma had no idea how it was that they had remained friends for so long, but Éliane was her best friend and so, despite being quite exhausted by her friend’s daily ongoing complaint about whatever it was that was personally vexing her, she half listened to her friend.

 Normally, Emma would have been sympathetic and offered Éliane some advice, but Éliane was the absolute worst when it came to taking advice and instead preferred moping around and taking everything way too dramatically as if the world was against her.

 So she did just that and Emma couldn’t wait for Éliane to move on to a new hyper-fixation.

 Unfortunately, that never happened.

 “Why don’t you – and I’m just ball-parking it here – actually tell Ev’ how you feel and y’know, maybe she’ll feel the same way?” Emma reiterated for what felt like the millionth time. By February, Emma had heard her friend lament her unrequited crush so often that she could predict what Éliane would tell her almost verbatim.

 “But Ems, what if she doesn’t? What if she thinks I’m gross and then never wants to speak to me again? Emma, I can’t risk that!” She bemoaned, burying her face in her pillow. It was a quiet Friday night and Emma had done the mistake of throwing an impromptu sleepover between her and Éliane. She had hoped it would be a fun sleepover; instead, she was being privy to another round of Éliane’s love tribulations.

 “If she thinks you’re gross she’s dead to all of us.” Emma stated in her no-nonsense tone. The rest of their friend group knew of Éliane’s preferences and could care less about who she dated. If Evelyn had a problem with it, she would be more than happy to kick her out of the circle, “She’s not worth your time if she can’t accept you the way you are.” This was why Éliane liked Emma. She was straight to the point and wasn’t afraid to speak her mind, even over controversial matters.

 “I knoooooow, but I like her sooooo much. Emmmmaaaaaaaaaaa, she’s sooooo pretty, it’s not faaaaaair,” She whined and put on her best kicked puppy expression. Emma rolled her eyes and threw a pillow at her. She was immune to that look by now. Mostly.

 “I mean, have we even ever heard Evelyn express an interest in anyone at school?”

 “Noooo, but what if – what if she has a boyfriend back home and she promised to be true to him? Or like what if she’s super conservative or something? Aren’t they conservative back in Alberta?”

 “Don’t you think she would have mentioned having a boyfriend – or someone special – back home after all this time? And even if there are people who are conservative back in Alberta, who’s to say that she is? God knows she follows you around on half your crazy schemed ideas. Maybe she likes you and she’s shy. Maybe she’s just a friend. Maybe you should just fucking talk to her and leave me out of your love life, please, Éliane, I’m not even your therapist.”

 Éliane pouted and threw the pillow back at her.

 “Big baby. Just write her a Valentine’s and play it off as a joke if she rejects you.”

 “That is the worst idea ever. My heart would be shattered and I’d never be able to face her ever again.” Emma sighed as Éliane went off another tangent. Sometimes, she wondered why she bothered.

 Éliane did not take up Emma on her advice and so, come Valentine’s Day, she did absolutely nothing and played it cool, by her standards. This meant that she kept a close eye on anyone who approached Evelyn with Valentine’s and she was only too pleased (relieved) when no one had made any outlandish love declarations to her. (Not that Evelyn didn’t deserve outlandish love declarations, but Éliane wanted to be the one to do them, not some other person.)

 It also meant that her heart sank when Evelyn didn’t get her any particular Valentine and that she only gave her a small chocolate, like she did with all of their other friends. It wasn’t that she expected anything, but if Evelyn had made a move on her, it would have helped ease her mind and given her some sense of direction. Still, Éliane had to consol herself; at least Evelyn was her friend. It could be so much worse.

 Her crush only kept growing as the days went by and even when she tried looking elsewhere, hoping that a distraction from Evelyn would help, it seemed her heart and mind were set on Evelyn no matter what. It was utterly annoying and Emma was ready to murder her if she kept this on.

 Therefore, Éliane came up with another of her Brilliant Plans, which Emma agreed was absolutely stupid. With prom coming up at the end of the year, Éliane decided to put her big move there and ask Evelyn to go as her date. Emma politely reminded her that prom was in literal months and that a million different things could happen between now and then. Plus, there was also the fact that Éliane would be even more insufferable until then.

 Éliane was pretty confident that it would give her enough time to gather more intel on whether or not Evelyn liked her That Way and hence, would only help her out in the long run. If anything, if Evelyn was dateless by then, they could just go as friends and Éliane could save face.

 In the meantime, however, there was One particular incident that left Éliane even more confused than ever before.

 It was a known fact that Éliane Maisonneuve liked to sprawl out when she sat down. Be it chair, sofa, couch or stool, Éliane took up as much space as possible. The other known fact was that Éliane Maisonneuve was a very tactile person. She had never heard of personal space when it came to her friends and if she was sitting with her friends, it wasn’t an uncommon sight to see her using her friends’ laps as extensions of the surfaces she was sitting on. She was known to sit on their laps, drape herself over them, lay her head on their shoulders or laps, and so on. No one was safe from her sprawling, not even Evelyn.

 During the winter months, Éliane opted for the school pants as opposed to the skirt, since it was too bloody cold outside and even with stockings, she froze. However, with spring back on the menu, she was quick to ditch the pants and go back to the skirt.

 It happened to be a skirt-wearing day, when, during lunch, Éliane had elected Evelyn’s lap to sit on, since she was the first to have finished eating lunch. Now, normally, when Éliane sat on Evelyn’s lap, Evelyn would put one arm over Éliane’s own lap, to keep her from falling off, and her other arm would either wrap itself around her waist, or rest against the back of the sofa they claimed for themselves for lunch, when they ate inside, in one of the school’s hangout spots.

 However, this time – this time something monumental happened.

 Éliane sat on Evelyn’s lap like always, and at first Evelyn held on to her as she normally did, but then, a few minutes later, Evelyn’s hand that was around her waist shifted ever so. At first, Éliane thought little of it, but then Evelyn placed her hand to rest on the side of her leg, underneath her skirt, right on her skin. Éliane stilled and tried to think little of it. Evelyn had just found a better way to place her hands, there was nothing to it – that had to be it. This wasn’t planned. This had been accidental, clearly. But then – then her friend went ahead and started – rubbing her skin? With her thumb? In a small, circular way? Or something. Because, Éliane felt Evelyn’s thumb rub her skin in a circular motion, but there was no way for her to see and she wasn’t about to ask (because it felt really good and she didn’t want Evelyn to stop and if she was hallucinating then she would look like a fool.) Plus, Éliane did try to get a read off Evelyn’s face, but when she looked, Evelyn wasn’t even looking her way, instead focused on whatever else it was their friends were saying, a small, gentle smile on her face.

 What. The ever loving fuck. Did this actually mean?

 Éliane tried to remain still, tried to brush it off as nothing and tried to play it cool, but for the rest of the day, she was a right hot mess and she spent the better part of the rest of the week (and month) replaying the feel of Evelyn’s hand on her bare thigh and it did not help any of her little fantasies one bit. (Because good Lord, someone help her, how she had wanted Evelyn’s hand to creep up her thigh, touch her elsewhere, make her feel good – how she had wanted to wrap her legs around her friend, grind against her, get her hands underneath Evelyn’s silly school blouse, feel her up – hear her moan –)

 This was really getting out of hand.

 Éliane kept pinning from afar, much to Emma’s annoyance, especially since she was the only one in their friend circle to know about her crush and no other major incidents of the sort came to throw Éliane for a loop. She still convinced herself that she would do something about it for prom, but Emma wasn’t convinced, and quite frankly, neither was Éliane.

 And then it was Éliane’s birthday.

 Éliane had a rather busy birthday schedule, what with celebrating with her family and twin sister, wanting to do something fun with her friends and also doing something lowkey on the actual day of. As was the standard amongst their friend group, one of them made a birthday cake to be had at lunch, there were presents and it was a lovely day overall.

 On top of that, she had all her favourite classes today and it was honestly looking up to be the best birthday ever. She was looking forward to the weekend and her mind was focused on the end of the day, when she got a note from Evelyn during class.

 “Meet me in the park by the swing set after class,” The note said and Éliane tried to get her friend’s attention, wondering what this could mean and what game her friend was playing at, but Evelyn never looked her way and so Éliane was left guessing. She even tried to ask her after class, but Evelyn went ahead of her, while the teacher asked Éliane to stay behind for a bit, since she wanted to go over some of the texts for the upcoming school play.

 Therefore, once she could leave, she ran to her locker to drop off her books, changed out of her school shoes, grabbed her sweater and backpack, and then ran off to the park next to the school. She hoped Evelyn hadn’t been waiting long and that she wouldn’t think she had stood her up, even though she had seen Éliane with their teacher. Still.

 Éliane nearly tripped down the stairs to the park and was ever so relieved to see that Evelyn was still there waiting for her.

 “What’s up?” She asked, slightly out of breath.

 “I wanted to give you your birthday gift.” She said, smiling at her and Éliane’s stomach did a funny thing at the sight. It always did a funny thing at the sight. It was such a pretty smile.

 “But, you gave me your gift earlier with the others,” She said, giving her friend a quizzical look. Not that she minded more gifts, but she didn’t expect her friend to get her multiple gifts.

 “I know – but this one is special. Close your eyes?”

 Éliane did as she was told even though her curiosity was eating her alive.

 “No peeking!” Evelyn cautioned and it was very tempting to, but Éliane remained still, with her eyes closed, heart beating wildly as she waited.

 Evelyn took her hands and Éliane figured she would place something in them, but instead her friend held on. Éliane was about to ask what this was all about, but the following moment, she felt the softest of presses against her lips. She gasped and her eyes opened on their own just in time to see Evelyn lean away from her, a lovely blush spreading across her cheeks.

 “Did you just – was that just –”There was no way Evelyn had kissed her. She must have dreamt the entire thing up and blacked out, or something. Maybe she had really slipped down the stairs, fallen and hit her head. It may have been her birthday and all, but these types of things only happened in trashy romance novels she liked to splurge on.

 “Look ,” Evelyn started, blush deepening across her face and Éliane stopped talking all together, while her brain tried to reboot itself, “I like you. A lot. And I have, for a while now... and well, I wanted to take a chance. Since it’s your birthday and all. And, yeah – I – don’t hate me?” She stammered and Éliane could only stare at her.

 Evelyn Murphy liked her.

 The absolutely wonderful person that was Evelyn Murphy liked her and had kissed her on her birthday. Éliane might actually faint and go into shock.

 Instead, she launched herself at Evelyn and kissed her hard. Evelyn stumbled back in surprise, trying not to fall over, and wrapped her arms around Éliane out of reflex.

 “I like you too, you silly goose, and I could never hate you,” Éliane blurted out when she pulled away, before cupping Evelyn’s face with her hands and kissing her again, this time much slower and softer. She let out a breathy little gasp when Evelyn held her, their bodies pressed close. It was everything she’d been hoping for months and everything she’d never, in her wildest dreams, think she’d get. She chased after as many kisses as Evelyn allowed her and silently swooned at the softness of her lips against her own. She knew, already, that she could never tire of this.

 “Go to prom with me?” She added, catching her breath, riding a high she never wanted to come down from. Evelyn’s eyes widened and then she smiled and it caught Éliane’s breath. It was such a lovely sight, so beautiful and pure, and she wanted to be the cause of those smiles for a very, very long time.

 “I’d love to,” Evelyn told her, before kissing her again. And again. And again and again.

 --

 It was nice, finally being able to hold Evelyn’s hand whenever she felt like it. Éliane made it her personal mission to walk to every class she had with Evelyn by holding her hand and sometimes, if Evelyn let her, she carried her books as well. She was stupid in love with her and she couldn’t believe how lucky she was that Evelyn liked her – that they could hold hands and kiss and spend a stupid amount of time texting each other strings of heart emojis late into the night. Éliane never wanted the feeling to end.

 It turned out that Evelyn wasn’t out to her parents and she had no idea how they would take to her being attracted to girls, so they agreed to keep things under wrap around them when Éliane went over. Éliane had already done her own coming out to her parents, almost two years ago, but she supposed she had an easier ride, considering her eldest brother was gay and very much cohabiting with his boyfriend for the past several years now. She was thankful that her parents were okay with it and could only hope that Evelyn’s parents would be as well, whenever it was she decided to tell them.

 For now, it just meant that Éliane had to keep her hands to herself when she was over at the Murphys’, but she could make-out with Evelyn at her place all she wanted, (or until her sister told her to stop being so gross.)

 May also meant receiving Cégep admission letters and a whole flock of stress, anxiety, and high emotions. Evelyn found the idea a little dumb, but since her family was still in Montréal and she would have to do an extra year of high school if she went back home, she had found herself obliged to apply as well. She ended up applying to most of the Cégeps her friends wanted to go to, so that she could at least be with them and she surprised herself when their excitement turned contagious when her own acceptance letters started trickling in.

 The only problem was that she had no idea where it was she wanted to go.

 She was pretty convinced she wanted to be an engineer – maybe a civil engineer later on, but so long as she did something science and math related in Cégep, she would be fine. Where she did it didn’t matter. She kept her options open and waited to see where the others would go. Therefore, when Éliane got accepted into the program of her choice in visual arts at the Cégep she really wanted to, Evelyn quietly accepted her own offer at the same school. (And when Éliane found out, nearly two weeks later, she had been extremely happy and there may or may not have been many tears.)

 She knew that realistically her chances of having any classes with Éliane were slim, that their schedules might not even match up, but maybe they could share a locker and maybe they could take one of the mandatory gym ,or French, or English, or humanities classes together.

 They could make it work. (She really hoped they could.)

 Bu those were problems and thoughts for later and so Evelyn buried them deep in her mind and instead focused on the upcoming ministry exams, the end of the school year, finding a dress for prom, memorising her lines for the end of year school play, finding time for her girlfriend and her friends, and everything else that came with being a senior in high school.

 --

 Emma decided to invite everyone over to her place, before they went to prom, to take photos and have cocktails, since she had the biggest yard between them. They agreed to meet up there and then make their way to the hall where the reception would take place.

 Despite Éliane asking, Evelyn had refused to show her any photos of her dress. Éliane had begged for hints, a description, anything, but Evelyn had remained tight-lipped, preferring to surprise her girlfriend at prom. Éliane had done her best pouting and pleading, but Evelyn was apparently immune to it all. Therefore, Éliane was an impatient mess when she got to Emma’s, eagerly anticipating the moment Evelyn would arrive.

 As per their plan, Evelyn had told her parents that she was going to prom with her friends, since “no boys had asked her” and her parents thought it was cute how the girls were sticking together. It was a perfect decoy and it meant that she could have all the photos she wanted with Éliane and her parents would never think twice about it.

 Éliane was about ready to text Evelyn, to ask her where she was and whether or not she had forgotten that they were supposed to meet up at Emma’s before heading to the reception hall, but then the doorbell rang and Éliane swore the entire planet froze in time when Evelyn walked in.

 Evelyn was wearing a midnight blue, long dress with cap sleeves that fell off her shoulders. It had a sweetheart bodice and a ruched waistline that did wonders for her figure and her complexion. The material of the dress was elegant and airy and it gave Evelyn a regal appearance.

 Her girlfriend was absolutely, drop-dead gorgeous.

 Her heart was going to explode from how full of love it was for Evelyn.

 Éliane did her very best to contain herself and not launch herself at Evelyn, but she did walk up to her and envelop her in the tightest of hugs she could manage, trying to convey everything it was she felt inside.

 “You are so breathtakingly beautiful,” She whispered in her ear as she pulled away. She grinned when Evelyn turned a lovely shade of pink and Éliane was far too pleased with herself.

 “And you’re absolutely stunning,” Evelyn murmured back, leaving a lingering touch to Éliane’s wrist, which left her skin tingling.

 Éliane had opted for something a little more party like. It was a champagne coloured, short dress with an asymmetrical bodice. It had one sleeve and bold folds that looked absolutely stunning on her. It was, after all, their prom, and she intended to party, dance and have the absolute greatest of times.

 Prom, delivered.

 The prom committee really outdid themselves, if Éliane did say so herself and it turned out to be a great evening. She got to sit with her best friends, got to dance with her girlfriend, took a stupid amount of photos with absolutely everyone she had ever spoken to during her five years in high school and only cried once – maybe twice, when she realised for good that this was her last few moments with these people – that one chapter of her life was closing and that a new adventure was right around the corner.

 But, before she got too lost in her own thoughts, there was still an after-prom, a million pool parties to attend and the greatest summer of her life to live.

 Most of the graduating class had decided to go camping for their after-prom, on some semi-remote campground a few hours away. The grounds promised privacy, no curfew, and a lax attitude towards underage drinking. Éliane had considered going, but then Emma had decided to do something a little simpler and had invited their group over to her place. Her parents would be out, they could pile up and sleep in the camper van in the backyard, eat all the junk food they could handle, talk late into the night, watch the stars and go swimming in the morning. The best part was that Mr. And Mrs. Dubois would even leave them alone, as they had decided to visit Mrs. Dubois’ sister back in Ottawa, which meant they had the whole place to themselves.

 They arrived at Emma’s place well past one in the morning and the girls were a flurry of activity as they changed into pyjamas and their graduating sweatshirts. High-heeled shoes, dresses and make-up were removed in favour of comfort as they crowded around each other to settle and keep the night going. Chips, cookies, candies, and soda were placed nearby as they munched on the snacks and laughed their worries away.

 It was nice, Éliane thought, and she secretly hoped that twenty years from now she would still be doing this with this same group of friends. Éliane tucked herself between Emma and Evelyn and found herself perfectly at ease. If time needed to freeze and stop and chose this particular moment to do so, she would be content.

 It didn’t, naturally, but Éliane found she didn’t really mind and was happy to snuggle up next to Evelyn when the sun started to rise and they could no longer keep their eyes open.

 “Love you,” She murmured into the folds of Evelyn’s arms and only registered what she’d said a moment or so later, when she felt Evelyn still beside her.

 She feared she’d let her mouth run wild once more and had an apology ready at her lips, but then she felt Evelyn hold her close and press a gentle kiss to the top of her head, “D’you really mean it?” She whispered for her ears only and Éliane nodded.

 “Yeah, I really do.”

 Evelyn smiled and it was a real thing of beauty that warmed her insides and made her heart soar. She levelled with her and sought her lips, before kissing her fully, “Love you, Evelyn,” She murmured, unable to stop herself from grinning.

 “I love you too, Éliane.” Evelyn whispered back, as if it was their secret alone.

 --

 Seeing as this was their last summer all together, Éliane made her mission to make sure they would see each other as often as possible and create the best summer memories. Therefore, there were many pool parties (and nothing had ever prepared her for the sight of her girlfriend – her Evelyn in the actual prettiest bikini ever made on God’s green earth.), a handful of parties and even though most of them had part time summer jobs, they made it work and by the time summer came to an end, Éliane was ready for the next chapter of her life.

 Cégep turned out to be an interesting and roller coaster of a venture. For as much as Éliane pretty much enjoyed it – liked the freedom it brought her, the expanded horizons of possibilities and being able to have classes that she genuinely enjoyed, Evelyn found it pointless and useless. It was a means to an end – something she had no choice in doing and the only thing that made it tolerable was the fact that Éliane was in many of her classes, they rode in or out together when their schedules matched and some of their friends from high school were also at the same school.

 Other than that, she absolutely abhorred the time she spent there and kept reminding herself that in two years time, it would be over. It seemed that just as she’d settled in to the rhythm of her new high school, she had been yanked out and forced to adapt to what she considered a waste of education.  Éliane made the mistake of pointing out once that maybe it had to do with her disengagement with her own program, but Evelyn shut down that theory rather quickly.

 Still, despite her foul mood and deep hatred for Cégep, Éliane did her best to cheer up her girlfriend, left little notes of encouragement in their shared locker almost every second day and thankfully, with Éliane and some of her friends by her side, she was able to coast through her first semester without burning the building down to ash.

 However, for as much as Evelyn had nothing positive to say about Cégep, she had to agree that the winter break between the first and second semester was delightful. There was a little over a month and a half of time off and even though she had a few exams during the exam period, she still had a good month of vacation. When she found out, sometime after midterms, a great plan hatched in her mind.

 The truth of the matter was that Evelyn missed Edmonton something fierce. She hadn’t been back since her family had relocated to Montreal and even though she liked her new life – it didn’t always feel like home. She missed her grandparents, missed her friends, and missed her favourite hangout spots.

 Therefore, Evelyn did her research, contacted the appropriate people, and once she had everything in order, she brought up the idea to her parents of flying to Edmonton after the holidays for three weeks. She would be staying with her grandparents, who were more than thrilled at the idea of having her over, she had enough money for her plane ticket from her summer job and she would be able to do all the things she missed and loved. Her parents weren’t exactly thrilled with the plan, but eventually they agreed.

 It was then that Evelyn launched part two of her plan, which was to ask Éliane to come over with her. (She had asked her grandparents as well, had explained that Éliane wasn’t just her friend – that they were a couple and thank goodness, they had been very accepting of that and thrilled at the idea of potentially meeting their granddaughter’s girlfriend.)

 Of course, Evelyn was very much aware of the fact that her girlfriend detested winter, would probably have preferred to go somewhere warm, if she could and Evelyn didn’t even know if Éliane would want to go to Edmonton with her, or if she had the means to do it, but when she told her of her plan, Éliane had been one hundred percent onboard.

 They bought their tickets together, the moment Éliane had the okay from her parents and then, at least, Evelyn could keep a countdown to not only the end of her first semester of hell-school, but also to the day she would be going back home to Edmonton – even if it was for a short while.

 The moment they arrived in Edmonton, Evelyn was ready to show her girlfriend all the sights. She had made an elaborate schedule, had contacted all her friends and she only hoped that Éliane would like it.

Of course, Éliane loved it all, even if she did complain about the cold at every chance she got, but Evelyn was always there to lend her a sweater, tie a scarf around her neck or let Éliane snuggle up to her at night.

 Éliane enjoyed the city and loved meeting Evelyn’s friends. It was nice to see her girlfriend’s old stomping grounds and Evelyn’s grandparents took to her right away, which they were both thankful for. It was nice being here and it amused Éliane to no end that their first trip as a “couple” was to Edmonton, something Evelyn thought wasn’t quite as exotic or romantic as it should be. Éliane told her they could make up for it at a later time – for their next vacation and the thought of that – of something that would happen in the future sent butterflies to Evelyn’s stomach.

 Overall, despite her lack of interest in Cégep, two years ended up going by quickly, somehow. Éliane liked to refer to those two years as Evelyn’s rebel phase, for it was during that time that Evelyn decided to learn how to ride a motorcycle (something Éliane absolutely loved very, very much – there was just something so incredibly hot about her girlfriend dressed in nice, tight leather pants with nice leather boots and an even nicer leather jacket mounting a motorcycle. Éliane called it sex on wheels. Evelyn always turned the loveliest shade of pink at the comment.)

 It was also during their stint in Cégep that Evelyn decided, one afternoon, while bored between classes, to get the upper part of her ear pierced. One of her classes had been cancelled, and she couldn’t go home, since she had another class after that. Since Éliane and her other friends were all unavailable, Evelyn had gone out for a walk, had passed by a tattoo and body piercing parlour and had decided to get it done, on a whim and out of boredom.

 Éliane had a lot to say about the piercing. Notably, that it was very sexy and added an extra layer of badass to Evelyn. Evelyn thought her girlfriend was being ridiculous – Éliane had shut her up with a kiss.

 And perhaps, the other thing that happened over the summer between their first and thankfully last year of Cégep was that their relationship reached a highly more physical level.

 They had – fooled around some ever since that memorable time towards the end of high school, but, nothing beyond wandering hands and heavy make-out sessions. Evelyn hadn’t been fully ready and Éliane had given her all the time she needed. There’d been some touching, a very few topless make-out sessions which had left Evelyn yearning for more, but something had always held her back. Maybe the fact that her parents and sister had been home, or that Éliane’s own family could walk in at any time.

 But there came a weekend over summer after their first year of Cégep, when Éliane had the whole house to herself. Her brothers were officially moved out, her sister had gone camping with her friends, and her parents had gone over to her mother’s friend’s cottage for the weekend. Éliane had invited Evelyn over to use the pool and there hadn’t really been any thought that this would happen over the weekend.

 Éliane had been sunbathing on one of the lawn chairs, when Evelyn had gotten out of the pool and walked towards her girlfriend, with the intention of flicking water in her face. Éliane had (over) reacted just the way Evelyn had hoped – shrieking and protesting that the water was so very cold, which had prompted Evelyn to drape herself over her girlfriend to flick even more water all over her.

 Éliane had tried to push her off and get away from her, but she had been trapped. Finally, Éliane gave up and Evelyn settled against her, content, with the sun warming her up and her girlfriend running a hand up and down her back. They’d stayed that way for a while, peaceful and quiet, until Evelyn had nuzzled her way to her girlfriend’s neck and had started leaving feather light kisses on Éliane’s neck.

 The feather light kisses turned languid and hot when Éliane let out breathy little moans and wrapped her legs around Evelyn’s body. Evelyn left Éliane’s neck in favour of her lips when her girlfriend started grinding against her and her hands left her back to slide underneath the straps of her bikini.

 Evelyn had never gone all the way with anyone – had never lain naked beside someone else, even though she had had her fair share of fantasies and had done a bit of self-exploration over the past few months. They’d talked it over, a few times, about their experiences and lack thereof and Evelyn had known, all along, that she could trust Éliane – that her girlfriend would respect her, no matter what it was that they did or didn’t do.

 And so, when they parted for air and Evelyn took in the sight of Éliane’s kiss swollen lips and mussed up hair, she felt a deep hunger for her that swooped at her belly and made her want to touch and lick and taste and kiss and feel.

 “Should we go to my room?” Éliane asked, her hand kneading the skin of Evelyn’s thigh, her fingers hitching ever higher, playing with the strings of the straps of her bikini. Evelyn nodded at that, disentangled herself from her, and then helped her up.

 They’d made their way to Éliane’s room and once Éliane had closed the door behind them – in case – she had pushed Evelyn to her bed and they’d resumed from where they’d left off before. Evelyn let her girlfriend guide them both and let go of her millions of thoughts running through her head. She followed her gut, paid close attention to Éliane’s reactions, and let her hands touch and feel, let her mouth kiss and taste.

 Evelyn marvelled at the goose bumps over Éliane’s breasts, over the texture of her nipple on her tongue and over every little sound and noise Éliane made, which Evelyn meticulously catalogued and memorised to later replay in her mind like a favourite song.

 This was an experience she had never felt before and one that she would love repeating over the many years to come - hopefully.

 And later, afterwards, as Evelyn lay with Éliane running her fingers through her hair, Evelyn couldn’t help but be thankful that somehow or other, despite not being keen over the move away from her beloved Edmonton, she had managed to find Éliane along the way. She hoped, as she shared a tender kiss with her girlfriend, that theirs would be a relationship that would last, and that if it didn’t, they could always remain friends.

 --

 The only thing that motivated Evelyn throughout their second – and luckily – last year of Cégep was the fact that she would be making university applications by the start of March. The drawback to that was picking which universities to apply. Éliane, once more, had her whole plan set out and her preferred university in mind. She was applying to one school and one school only, and if they didn’t accept her, then – well, her plan didn’t have a section for that, because she would get accepted. Evelyn envied her for that – was slightly jealous of the certainty and faith she had in her plan, even if she feared it would backfire on her. Not that Éliane didn’t have the grades or the talent for it, but there would be others who would be applying as well. Still, Éliane was convinced and Evelyn could only marvel at her.

 On the one hand, she could apply to the same place as Éliane again and go where she went, but Evelyn also wanted to go somewhere that would actually set her up on her desired career path. If she wanted to become an engineer, it would obviously help if she went to a university that was known for their engineering programs. The other problem was that after nearly three years, Evelyn was incredibly homesick.

 She liked Montreal just fine – was getting the hang of the city and its peculiarities, but – it wasn’t home. She missed her friends and family that were still in Edmonton, missed biking through the River Valley, and missed weather that actually made sense (to her). Therefore, on a whim, she decided to apply to the University of Alberta and figured that – if she got in – she could make her decision then and have that conversation with Éliane at that point. There was no need to cause alarm just yet.

 Evelyn kept telling herself that if she didn’t get accepted at the University of Alberta, then it would be a clear sign that she wasn’t meant to go back – not now anyways, and that would be that. It would make her life easier, Éliane would never need to know, and life would move on. However, every time she started thinking that way, part of her really hoped she would be accepted there.

 In the end, obviously, because life never played out the way she wanted it to, she was accepted at two of the three schools she had applied to – one in Montreal and the other one in Edmonton.

 Before she broke the news to Éliane, she sat herself down and made a rather long and elaborate list of all the pros and cons she could think of about attending both schools. The problem was that her number one con about going back to Edmonton was that Éliane would be in Montreal and her biggest con about staying in Montreal was that she really missed home and wouldn’t get to see it for god only knew how much longer.

 When she finally brought the list to Éliane – when she finally gathered up her courage for this conversation, her girlfriend was a little put off about having been left in the dark, if only because she didn’t like the idea of Evelyn going through this burden alone, but she was ready to find solutions.

 “I could get transferred to UofA; I’m sure they have an art program,” She said as she started tapping away at her phone, looking up the offered programs as though this was the easiest and most logical of solutions.

 “El, don’t – I mean, it’s not that I don’t want you to come with, but – you had a whole plan and you were super psyched about getting into UQAM. Plus, you even said, they only take a few people per year, so that means your portfolio was really good.”

 “Exactly. So if UQAM took me then it shouldn’t be a problem for UofA. I can apply to get transferred for winter term and then we can be together again.” She smiled brightly at that, closed off her phone as if the case was solved and shelved, but it didn’t sit well with Evelyn.

 Evelyn loved that Éliane was ready to drop everything to follow her, but at the same time, she knew her girlfriend was impulsive – that she came up with plans in a blink of an eye and didn’t always think the consequences through. She knew, deep down, that eventually, for as much as Éliane would be charmed by the city and enjoy it, she would feel like a fish out of the water. She wouldn’t have her friends, she wouldn’t have her sister and she wouldn’t have her bearings with the city.

 She knew that, for as much as Éliane liked to play the tough act, for as much as she was the life of a party, that deep down, she was very sensitive; that even if she made new friends (which she would) and even if she ended up loving her program, the pillars of her own life would be missing and it would slowly, but surely, eat at her. The last thing Evelyn wanted to do was make Éliane miserable and she didn’t Éliane to resent her for it, in the long run, either.

 She brought up these points to Éliane, but just as she feared, Éliane rebuked every one of her arguments, because on top of everything else, her girlfriend was absolutely stubborn.

 “But, if you’re all the way in Edmonton, that means a different time zone, I don’t get to see you as often and – you might never come back,” Éliane finally admitted, hours later, when it felt as though they were going around in circles with this discussion. She sounded small and – insecure and it was then that Evelyn realised that the real root of the problem wasn’t that Evelyn wanted to study outside of the city, it was that Éliane knew how much she missed Edmonton and Éliane feared she would never return once she went back.

 The real problem was that Evelyn, for as much as she wanted to reassure her that she would – that she’d go there for the length of the degree and then come back – wasn’t sure she could say so convincingly. Who was to say what would happen when she got there? Who was to say that she would find a job in Montreal post-graduation? Who was to say that she and Éliane would still be together that many years ahead?

 “Look, I don’t know what’s going to happen between now and then – but I want this to work, between us. I’m not running away to Edmonton to find some other girl or to replace you and I promise I’m going to do my best to make this long distance whatever work between us.” She started and gathered Éliane in her arms. Her girlfriend made herself small and buried her face in the folds of her sweater, taking in a deep breath, committing the scent of Evelyn to her mind, already knowing she would be gone within a few months.

 “I promise too,” Éliane added softly, not meeting Evelyn’s eyes, already fighting to keep the tears at bay, “I mean – I want this to work too and I want you to be happy, so do what you feel will make you happiest.”

 “But you make me happy, El,” Evelyn pressed a kiss to the top of Éliane’s head and that at least got a smile out of her, “I like having you around.”

 “And I’ll still be here – after you’re done, but I don’t want you to miss out on this opportunity. I don’t want you to have regrets, twenty years from now or resent me because in a way I kept you here – that you stayed back because of me.”

 “Are you sure?”

 Éliane nodded, “I’ll miss you. I already miss you. But we can still talk and text, yeah?” She asked as if it was a question – as if Evelyn wasn’t already thinking of having weekly video call dates, or something of the likes. She would be going from having Éliane around her nearly every day to being miles and miles apart. It would be a big adaptation – for both of them, but with Éliane’s blessing, Evelyn felt a little more confident that it would work out in the end.

 --

 Their last summer together was – different, if they were to compare them to the previous ones. Knowing that Evelyn would be gone by the end of it, Éliane made it a point to spend as much time with her as possible and to create as many memories – good memories, so that Evelyn would want to come back.

 No matter how many times Evelyn reassured her that she would return, Éliane was still a little worried that this was it – that Evelyn would move on, but she still put on a brave face and did her best to be supportive and happy for her. (Which she was – but, why did Edmonton have to be so far away?)

 On the day that she left, Éliane went to the airport with Mr and Mrs Murphy and did her utmost best not to cry in front of them. (There would be time later – when she was home and alone in her bedroom. She didn’t want to cause a scene at the airport. She didn’t want to be that person.)

 “I’ll be back before you know it.” Evelyn told her when they shared one last tight hug. Her voice cracked a little and she did her best to swallow her own tears that threatened to spill forth.

 “I promise I’ll try to come over reading week.” They’d talked of the possibility and Éliane had been firm when she’d said she’d come to Edmonton at any chance she had – anytime they had time off. Evelyn admired her determination, but felt her girlfriend had forgotten how expensive the plane tickets could get.

 “Love you,” Evelyn chose to say instead.

 “Love you more.” Éliane stepped back and let Evelyn go. She watched as her girlfriend exchanged one more hug with her family and then went to queue up with the other travellers. She waved and waved again and tried not to think about the gap she suddenly felt in her chest.

 University turned out to be much harder than Cégep, but Evelyn enjoyed it a lot more. It wasn’t always easy, but the work was much more challenging and she felt like she was actually advancing with life. She got to reconnect with her old friends, made new ones and the only thing missing – the only person missing to make it all the more perfect was Éliane.

 They made it a point to have weekly video calls, just like Evelyn had thought of before she left, but it wasn’t always easy to keep with their schedule, what with different time zones, part time jobs, school work and the myriad of other obligations that got in the way. Still, every time they did talk, Evelyn felt as though the missing puzzle piece to her life was slotted into place.

 And, for as much as they settled into their new routine, slowly got used to not being around each other (Evelyn liked to say that absence made the heart grow fonder), there came a time when Éliane started to really think that Evelyn had moved on. When she would stay up far too late and see her girlfriend post photos on social media, out with her new friends, having a jolly good time, and some ugly thing inside of her whispered that Evelyn was replacing her – that this relationship would fizzle out. It also didn’t help that with time zones and busy schedules, midterms and projects, their weekly video calls became shorter and were sometimes postponed or cancelled.

 Éliane tried to tell herself that it was normal, that Evelyn had a life out there, that she was busy herself, but the fear kept gnawing at her and she hated that she thought this way. Deep down she knew it wasn’t true, but no matter how hard she tried to convince herself, there was still always an ounce of doubt that stayed.

 Eventually, it crept up in a conversation, just before winter break and Evelyn hated that her girlfriend thought she wasn’t as interested anymore.

 “Sweetheart, no – look, I know it’s hard, I miss you – a lot, but I promise I really want this to work between us and if ever, for some really absurd reason, I wasn’t interested anymore, I would let you know. I would never string you along, okay? And even if I’m in class, or asleep, you can still message me – I’ll answer you later, just like we’ve been doing, alright?”

 Éliane nodded and wiped the tears away from her eyes. She hated that she couldn’t be strong – that something so trivial had gotten to her, but at the same time, hearing Evelyn say those words comforted her a bit, “I love you,” She said instead, because it was true and because sometimes it felt like her heart was too small to contain all the love she felt for Evelyn.

 “Love you more, you silly goose. And I miss you. And I’m looking forward to seeing you this summer.”

 Éliane smiled a little at that – at the promise of two weeks with Evelyn mostly all to herself. It wouldn’t be the same as the other summers, but she supposed they had to make do with what they got.

 “Thanks for listening,” She said.

 Evelyn smiled softly and touched the screen for a moment, “Of course – I’m always here for you, just like you’re always there for me.”

 It didn’t suddenly get better or easier after that call, but Éliane felt just a little less alone. She stopped worrying that she was being extra clingy and reached out to Evelyn whenever she felt she needed it. She didn’t hold back when she wanted to send her a message, even if it was a simple heart emoji and the wonderful thing was that Evelyn replied to every single one and would send them back as well.

 For the first time since Evelyn had left for Edmonton, Éliane felt a little lighter and started to believe that they would grow stronger from this and that they’d find a way to make it work. It was hard work, sure, she didn’t always like the distance, but it made her appreciate the time they had even more and because it was worth it to her – to the both of them, it pushed them both to keep working towards it.

 If Evelyn sent her a sweater of hers for Christmas, well, maybe, just maybe it became Éliane’s favourite and she compulsively wore it all the time over the following four years, even after it stopped smelling of her girlfriend.

 Éliane still considered transferring to UofA, or at the very least, doing an exchange for one semester, just to be with Evelyn for a few months. When she told Evelyn about it, she suggested to go somewhere different – not to hold back just because of her. She didn’t want her to miss out on some great experience or opportunity and settle for this out of some skewed sense of obligation. She could always visit her in Edmonton, but how many chances would she have to go literally anywhere else in the world? Evelyn threw back at her the same words and wisdom she had given her a year before and, with Evelyn’s blessing, Éliane applied elsewhere.

 In the end, she went to study art in Italy, for the length of her second semester. She loved every moment of it, fell in love with the people, the food, and the culture, and sent too many postcards to Evelyn, until her entire wall was full of them.

 To top it all off, since the school schedule in Italy was a little different, Evelyn even managed to surprise Éliane at the end of the term, when she flew in to spend some time with her, and they got to spend two weeks together in Italy.

 And, somehow or other, they made it through undergrad together, even if they weren’t always in the same city.

 --

 When Evelyn had to apply for her Master’s degree, she once more decided to apply to schools both in Edmonton and back in Montreal. After four years back home, she felt that she had found the catharsis and closure she had been looking for all those years, after her father had sprung the move on her back when she was in high school. On top of that, she had really missed Éliane and – to her biggest surprise, she had also missed her life in Montreal.

 She still wasn’t sure where she would eventually settle, how that would play with Éliane, but she figured, if she studied in Montreal, it would buy them both another two years before they had to figure it out.

 This time around, she was accepted to the better of the engineering schools in Montreal and so, she took that as a sign that moving back was the right course of action – at least for now.

 To absolutely no one’s surprise, Éliane was very excited when Evelyn broke the news of her decision to her, a few days later, once she had accepted the offer and weighed in all the pros and cons, and Evelyn had to admit that she was looking forward to going back – to picking up where things had left off and moving forward.

 She was still a little sad that she was leaving Edmonton behind yet again, but this time, it was on her own terms and she knew that she could always come back and that no matter where she lived or where she went, the city would always be part of her.

 Her first year back was – interesting, to say the least. For starters, she had to get used to living with her parents again, which seemed like a strange thing to say, but she had gotten used to staying with her grandparents during her undergrad degree. On top of that, the commute was different from what she’d known beforehand and sometimes, she cursed the suburbs. It was so very far away and there was so much wasted time.

 Another thing she had to get used to again, which was also a strange thing to say, was being around Éliane again – or at the very least, the possibility of being around her again more often. It took them a while to fall back into their regular old patterns, even if they were happy to be able to be together again. At first, Evelyn had worried that maybe being away for so long had changed her feelings for Éliane, but once they talked it over and figured things out, she settled in her new routine and got the hang of it.

 During that first year, Éliane moved out of her parents’ place and got one of her own, which Evelyn started spending more and more time at, since it was much closer to school and it also gave them more privacy than in their former bedrooms. She was there so often, in fact, that by the end of the first semester, she had her own spare key to the place, in case Éliane wasn’t around and she wanted to crash, and by the end of the second semester, Éliane casually asked her if she wanted to permanently move in with her.

 Evelyn had been surprised and shocked by the offer. She had thought about it, they had talked about it, but she hadn’t thought Éliane would ask her so soon. Then again, she supposed she hadn’t taken into account her girlfriend’s impulsiveness. Therefore, over summer break, Evelyn moved her stuff halfway across town and finally, she was settled in with Éliane.

 Her second and last year of her Master’s was just as interesting as her first and came with its own challenges and adaptations. For starters, there was the fact that she was now living with her girlfriend. For as much as it was great, for as much as she loved the idea of having a place that was her own and that she and Éliane could build together, there were also times when they’d find themselves butting heads over the most inane of things. It was a test and exercise in compromise, patience, and communication and even though they didn’t always get it right on the first try, they kept at it and eventually found solutions to their problems.

 Finally, eventually, she finished her program, somehow or other, and on graduation day, her parents, her sister, and Éliane were there to see her receive her diploma. There was something – oddly soothing about having them all there, about knowing that she could have this – that her parents were accepting and welcoming, that she had the chance and privilege to have this, when so many others did not.

 To celebrate the occasion, Mr and Mrs Murphy took them all out to a nice dinner and Evelyn thought it was the perfect ending to her academic career.

 It was only later, when they were back at their own place and her parents and sister had left that Evelyn received the surprise of her life.

 “I have a gift for you,” Éliane said, which surprised Evelyn, since her girlfriend had already given her a gift earlier that moment. Then again, Éliane was notorious for such things, so really, it shouldn’t have come as a shock. However, what did come as a shock was when Éliane walked up to her, got down on one knee and then proposed to her – ring and all – speech and hopeful smile included.

 And – they had spoken about this, before – had brought it up a handful of times under different circumstances; sometimes as a joke, other times seriously, but – it still took her by surprise for the simple reason that she hadn’t thought Éliane would ask her on the day of her graduation – or that Éliane would be the one to ask. If anything, Evelyn was convinced that she would have beaten her to it.

 She said yes, obviously, and Evelyn wondered if it was possible to bottle up the giddy feeling she felt inside of her and drink from it for the rest of her life.

 --

 Éliane put the photo album she’d been perusing down when she heard the front door open followed by Evelyn’s usual “I’m home!” She craned her head back in time to see her wife remove her motorcycle helmet and put it down before she passed a hand through her hair. Éliane couldn’t help but smile, fond and still so very much in love after all these years, as she watched one of her favourite daily spectacles.

 She greeted her back and then watched as her wife then removed her leather jacket and put down her messenger bag before removing her boots and making her way towards her. “Hi,” She said, smiling wider as Evelyn bent down to kiss her properly in greeting. They went through their daily exchange of “how was your day” and “you’ll never believe what happened when,” as Evelyn settled beside Éliane and made herself comfortable, slowly unwinding from her day.

 “What have you been up to?” Evelyn asked as Éliane carded her fingers through her hair.

 “I was doing some cleaning and stumbled upon our old high school album! Ended up doing a lot of reminiscing and got a little distracted,” She admitted with a laugh. Evelyn chuckled and rolled her eyes, far too used to her wife’s antics, but was nonetheless fond. Éliane was notorious for this, but it was endearing in its own way.

 “Yeah?”

 Éliane nodded and retrieved the aforementioned album from the pile of what turned out to be other photo albums and opened it up to a random page, “Look! There you are!” She said pointing at a photo of the theatre troupe.

 Evelyn took the album out of her hands and brought it closer to her face to get a good look, she groaned when she saw the photo, “Ugh, what was up with my hair?”

 “Hush you; you had very nice hair – you still have very nice hair,” Éliane reproached, taking back the album as though afraid Evelyn would say more bad things about her past self and somehow or other insult the album in the process.

 “You were very biased,” Evelyn teased, grinning wolfishly at her.

 “No – I just have impeccable taste.”

 Evelyn laughed and pulled her wife closer, despite her protests at being manhandled in such a way (even though they both knew it was mostly for show), before she pressed noisy kisses to the side of her face, “Very, very biased – so biased. So biased that there’s a photo of you beside the definition of the word, in the dictionary.” She went on, grinning, inches away from her lips, “The most biased, actually,” She added before kissing her softly. She felt Éliane cup her face and kiss her back, soft and pliant, and so welcoming and loving – like always, like it had been those first careful times what felt like a thousand lifetimes ago.

 “Just for you, darling,” Éliane murmured, moments later, when they parted to catch their breaths, “Always just for you.”

 Evelyn laughed and the sound of it thrilled Éliane who held her wife close, loving her more with each passing moment – with each breath she took. She still thrilled and marvelled that even so many years later, they still kept choosing each other, every single day and she knew that for as long as she lived, Evelyn would always have her.

 FIN

#pc: montreal #pc: edmonton #pc: fem!montreal #is that gonna be a tag now lamao #pc: fem!edmonton #evelyn murphy #éliane maisonneuve #au #fic #it's DONE

[quatschmachen]

Transit

Please enjoy the regular updates before real life steals my soul. Continuation of Indeterminate Forms.

XXXX

When he awoke he had no idea where he was. There was dim light coming in from the hallway and he thought it weird that the wakeup call from the hotel involved someone actually coming into his room gently shaking him awake.

Opening his eyes he looked up at the blurry person, frowning as things sort of came into focus. This hotel attendant sure looked a lot like Ed, and he wondered with horror if somehow Ed had discovered he was in the city and was here to lecture him.

“Étienne, stop staring at me, it’s time to get up, breakfast is ready along with some coffee,” the person also sounded a lot like Ed.

Slowly the events of the previous day filtered back and Étienne realized that in fact, he was in Ed’s house, and that they were going to the transit meeting together.

“I’m up,” Étienne grumbled swatting at Ed’s hand.

“Alright, if you’re not dressed and out of this room in five minutes for breakfast I’ll give Calvin your portion of the bacon…” Ed threatened before he left the room.

Sitting up, Étienne rubbed the sleep from his eyes before putting on his glasses. He wondered how long these next three days were going to be. Dressing, he made sure he looked decent, before hurrying out of the bedroom, the threat of missing out on bacon hanging heavy upon him. If the bacon was as good as yesterday’s meal, he did not want to miss out.

Entering the kitchen, he came across Calvin in a pink apron cooking up some eggs, standing around in some shorts and a red t-shirt, very obviously not going into the office today.

Ed was sitting at the table already eating, his hair neatly combed, light blue shirt sleeves rolled up, pastel pink tie loose around his neck, no doubt to be tightened when he was about to step out the door. What surprised Étienne was that Ed was wearing simple thin golden rimmed glasses, the lenses oval in shape. Usually Ed wore contacts, so he was not sure if the glasses were a new common addition, or if Ed was in fact being lazy.

“Uhm?” Étienne was not sure whether he should sit down or grab a plate.

Turning around, Calvin gestured to him, “Sit down, yours is nearly ready.”

Glancing at the front of the apron, Étienne let out a snort of laughter, “Nice apron.” Upon it was a steaming baked potato, with the witty phrase ‘Let’s get baked.’

“Hmm?” Calvin looked down, as if he had forgotten which one he was wearing, and then smiled, “Of course you would appreciate this one! How do you like your eggs?”

“Uh… over easy.” Étienne responded, saying the first thing that came to his mind.

Breakfast was not very eventful, Ed keenly keeping his eye upon the time.

“Ahh we need to hurry, or we’re going to miss the bus,” Ed said, swallowing his last bite. Standing up, he placed his dishes into the sink before moving to the refrigerator and taking out two matching lunch boxes. Quickly he put them into his work bag, and was about to leave the kitchen when Calvin cleared his throat.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?” Calvin asked pointedly.

Glancing over to Étienne, Ed frowned, “Finish your coffee already!”

“No not Étienne silly, anyways fairly certain he knows how to chase after you, hold on,” standing up from his seat, Calvin sauntered over to Ed who was looking up at him in confusion.

“You forgot this,” Calvin’s hands casually ran up Ed’s tie, and with a gesture that indicated that this probably was not the first time that Ed had nearly ran out the door with tie half done, straightened it up. Hands gentle smoothing down Ed’s collar, Calvin gave him a smile, and then added, “And this.” He leant down slightly to give Ed a soft kiss on the mouth, the other man standing there eyes fluttering shut before snapping open again as if remembering they had a guest in the house. Pulling away, Calvin smiled down at Ed, “Have a good day, if anything happens I should be around, well except for the early afternoon, there’s some errands to run…”

Flushing, Ed nodded, “Well we gotta go.”

“Alright, see you guys.” Calvin stood back, so that Étienne, who had loudly clanged his dishes into the sink while they had kissed (it had not been on purpose, it was just that while watching the tie being straightened, the kiss had taken him by surprise, all of these casual touches felt unusual to him, and he was beginning to suspect that Calvin had not had the best of intentions when he invited him to stay over), passed by, dashing to the guest bedroom to get his suitcase.

It was a relief to step out into the cool July morning, the emerald leaves on the trees casting a deep shadow upon the sidewalk while Ed hurried before him towards the bus stop, his hair moving slightly out of place from his rush.

Reaching the bus stop, Ed anxiously peered up the street, as if trying to determine whether or not they had missed it.

“Geez you walk fast,” Étienne managed to get out as he caught his breath.

“Mmm,” Ed frowned and then glanced back to Étienne. “Well, speed walking for the bus should be something you’re used to right? Unless you’ve gotten so used to using an old man mobility device back home.”

“Excuse me! I am not that old, Edward,” Étienne sniffed, “I am just commenting that your speed has picked up.”

“Oh.” Ed was glancing at his watch with a frown, “Well, it’s probably from the biking? Or not sure if baseball counts…”

“You still playing baseball?”

“Yeah, twice a week, actually we have a game tonight, so, either you get to spend the time with the chickens or enjoy the sight of me and Calvin try to hit some balls with a stick.”

“Well, that photo you showed me of Calvin in his uniform would be nice to see in person,” Étienne responded, the idea that they were in place enough to be part of a local team reinforcing the fact that yes, Calvin had shifted his life to live with Ed. “Didn’t you two pick up another sport as well?”

“What? Oh no, Calvin wanted us to try out soccer, but honestly, the idea of spending every free evening playing a sport does not appeal; sometimes I need the time to unwind, and having a garden is almost like having a child, especially if one wants good results…” “I suppose that makes sense…” Étienne  looked down, not sure how to broach the topic he actually wanted to talk about, finally he decided to just ask the question. “Doesn’t Calvin miss his city?”

“Oh, well, he still has his place down there and he visits every two weeks or so for this and that, really it’s not such a big deal anymore,” glancing up the street and smiling as he noticed the bus coming, Ed added as if it was an afterthought, “I suppose, while we are tied to our places we can still make our own decisions of who we want to be, right? Right now his home is here, with me, and if in the future it needs to change, so be it.”

The bus stopped in front of them, and Ed flashed his pass. Étienne fumbled with the tickets Ed had handed him the night before, putting one into the slot, and then grabbing the transfer. The bus was not yet entirely packed with other morning commuters, the ones already there seemed to prefer the front seats and Edward shuffled down the middle of the aisle, the bodies pressing in around them. Finally, he squished onto a seat near the back, Étienne squeezing next to him.

Edward was glancing out the window as if in thought, his work bag perched on his lap, arms wrapped around it, before he finally looked back to Étienne, who unashamedly was staring at him, waiting for him to continue.

“I’ve had a long time to think about things, Étienne. I don’t mean to sound rude, but I don’t think I can love them and leave them like you do… While it works for you it doesn’t for me. Living with Calvin has really driven that home for me. I give up on trying to protect my heart, and my life. I was never happy pretending to be someone I wasn’t, and if in a year, five years, ten years, a century from now Calvin decides he’s bored of me, so be it.”

“Hmm,” Étienne was not sure how he wanted to respond, the words hitting him like stones, he decided to go with the safe way, “Whoa, I didn’t think this early in the morning you could be so philosophical.” Giving an exaggerated yawn, Étienne leant back in his seat, and closed his eyes, glad to have the excuse to hide the irritating stinging that had appeared at Edwards words, “Let me know when we get to the place.”

“Alright,” Ed’s voice was embarrassed, low, as if he was wishing he had never brought up the topic.

XXXX

Reaching Edmonton Tower, Étienne took in the new building with interest. Calvin was right that Ed had grown an inch taller; it had been a weird adjustment to make as he walked alongside the man, confidence clear in his clipped steps.

The other aspect was that Edward seemed to know everyone he passed, many people calling good morning, and as they entered the elevator, someone immediately engaging Ed in a conversation concerning a new development.

Was this what it meant to be fully engaged in one’s city? Étienne mused, while he was part of his city’s life, he was most definitely not the most popular of men when it came to city business. Usually people avoided talking to him, preferring to converse with Élyse when it came to topics such as infrastructure. Had he been disengaged for too long perhaps? Then again, whenever he did try to engage in improving his city, the results tended to… well… Élyse was better at the infrastructure.

Following Ed out onto the proper floor, he was lead into a meeting room, where some other people were already sitting, cups of coffee placed before them like beacons.

Edith was sitting near the end, her cats-eye glasses a brilliant fuchsia with small crystals along the edge. Her dress was a professional yet flattering clingy purple number with yellow and white splotches like a modernist painting that emphasized her curves.

“Edith? I thought you weren’t coming?” Ed asked frowning, “I thought the point of me coming was so you could do the other meeting?”

Casually looking at her blue nails, Edith shrugged, “It got cancelled. Seeing as you plan on discussing the mess happening in my part of the city, I figured it would be worthwhile for me to show up… good morning Étienne, glad to see you could make it.”

“Morning Edith,” Étienne settled down next to Ed who was busy frowning at Edith suspiciously. There seemed to be an undercurrent which Étienne could not quite figure out.

These musings however were cut short when a portly man entered the room, and brought the meeting to order.

It was about the mess of the Valley Line, which had been dragging on for the past year. Originally it had seemed to be going well, until it had reached Bonnie Doon.

As the various people gave suggestions, Étienne caught the eye of Ed who was clearly disagreeing with the suggestion of the current person. Glancing over Ed raised his eyebrows in a “Can you believe this idiot?” manner to which Étienne give a slight shake of his head.

The meeting got tense when Edith set out her own graphs of what was going wrong, along with her firm solutions. Apparently she had always wanted the track elevated in order to avoid this situation. This opinion managed to greatly offend John, the portly man, who exclaimed that at the time the thirty seconds saving had not looked worthwhile for spending the rest of the money.

Finally it came to Étienne’s turn, where he offered his information, the other people looking at him like some sort of transit god – of what not to do.

When lunch was announced relief seemed to ripple around the room. There was a polite layout of dilapidated sandwiches, but Ed was already on his way out of the conference room.

“I usually like to sit outside for lunch when I can,” Ed mentioned as he led Étienne towards the elevator, “I hope you don’t mind, us leaving the lunch layout. Usually I find the catering to be subpar at these meetings, with the lettuce wilted and the mayo rancid.”

“It’s fine.” Étienne responded, wondering where Ed was taking them.

As they reached the outside of the building, Ed’s footsteps turned towards Churchill square. He was carrying the lunch bags, his steps quick, “I prefer to sit outside City Hall, it’s nice to see everyone pass by, see the kids in the fountain, unless there is somewhere else…?”

“Its fine,” Étienne responded automatically, cringing as he realized he had said the same thing twice in a row, he needed to stop focusing upon their earlier conversation.

Sitting on some of the concrete risers that looked into Churchill Square, Ed handed Étienne one of the lunch bags, “Hope you don’t mind sandwiches.” He paused, “Well, my sandwiches. Everything should be not wilted, and not rancid… plus the bread is fresh.”

“So long as there isn’t a slimy tomato I am fine,” Étienne responded taking one of the lunchboxes.

“Well there is some tomato… but if you don’t like it you can pick it out, I won’t mind. These ones seem to be a little tart.”

“What I am curious about is your matching lunchboxes?” Étienne asked he opened it up to take out the sandwich.

Flushing slightly, Ed said, “Well, they were on sale, and Calvin thought it would be cute if when we had meetings we could match…” he looked down at his own sandwich and took a bite, clearly not wanting to say anymore.

The sun was shining down onto the square, making it slightly on the edge of uncomfortable in heat, and Étienne glanced out at the bustling square, understanding why Edward preferred to sit outside and watch the people. There were some kids squealing and splashing in the fountain, their tired caretakers sitting at the tables in the shade nearby keeping a wary eye in case one of them injured themselves. There was a vibrancy in the city that he hadn’t noticed before, an optimism renewed where things clearly were happening.

“This is good,” Étienne commented halfway through his sandwich, “Is there any beverage?”

“Oh right,” Ed dug in his bag and pulled out two containers of juice, “Is orange alright?”

“Perfect.” Poking the straw through the foil, Étienne took a sip, trying to gather his thoughts. He knew that he should probably say something about this morning, he could sense that Ed was still feeling embarrassed about it. Swallowing, he looked up at the blue sky, and then back to Ed.

“I’m glad for you.”

“Hmm?” Ed looked up, chewing, confusion upon his face.

“You’ve done really well for yourself, look at how vibrant your city is, you’ve really pulled it up, put a lot of effort into growing and improving,” Étienne waved towards the people, enjoying their lunchbreak, “You don’t need to defend yourself for the decisions you’ve made. Obviously they were the right ones.” As the words came out, Étienne realized to his surprise that he meant every word, he was proud of Ed. There had been so much growing in the past few years, and he was clearly happy. “I think you’re right…”

“Right?” Ed had finished his sandwich, and was working on his juice box.

Finally, looking at Ed with a soft smile, Étienne repeated, “Right. You’re right about deciding your own life path, and hell, please don’t use me as an example, fairly certain I’m the ‘what not to do’ scenario concerning life decisions… there is no shame in having a happy relationship with someone you love. While it’s not for everyone, clearly it’s for you, and that’s all that really matters, right?”

“I suppose…” Placing his empty juice box into his lunch container, Ed was looking at Étienne with a slight frown, as if trying to puzzle out another meaning from his words. “A-are you happy as well, Étienne?”

“Hmmm…” a simple question with a complex answer, looking back towards the fountain, he carefully chose his words, “As happy as I ever am.”

“Oh.” The word fell heavy between them, and Étienne realized that perhaps he had chosen the wrong words.

Finishing his sandwich, he looked back to Ed, who was looking at him with a worried expression.

“What is it?”

“You look tired Étienne, are you sure you are doing well, personally I mean?”

“Reminder, you are talking to someone who is notorious for keeping a shitty sleeping schedule, Edward,” Étienne teased.

“I’m being serious here, you look sort of… gaunt.”

“It’s the new look,” another flippant answer, he knew the words were not being taken seriously by Ed, who was continuing to stare at him with a rather serious expression.

Reaching over, almost in a dreamlike manner, Ed brushed a curl away from Étienne’s cheek, his finger twining into it, tugging it to the full length, and letting go, his expression changing from worry to amusement as it sproinged back into shape.

“Trying out a new style, Étienne?” he asked with a soft smile, his hand hovering, hesitating a moment as if he was about to think better of it, before his fingers once more touched Étienne’s hair, gently combing out the long curls. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you with such long hair.”

Relaxing into his hand, enjoying the innocent touch of Ed gently playing with his hair, Étienne sighed heavily, “No, I’ve been too busy to get my hair cut, and honestly, when I do have the time to get it cut, have not cared to.”

“Oh? Well it suits you, but you know,” Ed gave a soft tug of Étienne’s hair, frowning a little, “If you want I can give you a haircut later tonight?”

Raising his eyebrows, Étienne responded, “Why would I trust you, a non-professional, to cut my hair?”

“Excuse me Sir Picky Pants, me and Calvin took one of those community centre courses, I am in fact a certified barber, very handy with my scissors. Calvin’s hair cut? Done by me, thank you very much.”

“Well it does look good, but honestly I am not keen to have the exact hairstyle of Calvin.”

Giving him a small punch in the shoulder, Ed said, “I know more than one style, Monsieur Maisonneuve, but it’s up to you…” the bell tower began to chime, Ed jumping up. “Shoot, we need to get back to the meeting.”

XXXX

The rest of the meeting had dragged on like a zombie pulling a trolley, and Étienne was glad to find himself sitting outside once more, watching Edward and Calvin play baseball. Dinner had been a brief affair, their practice beginning at six thirty.

He had not minded the fact that he did not have to speak to them for a bit, it was a relief. He kept running over the earlier conversations in his mind, picking them apart trying to make sure he had not fucked up somehow.

Their team seemed to be doing well, and as it drew to a close, he watched wistfully at how friendly everyone was. It seemed that the two were rather popular amongst the team, and as the team broke up for the evening, the sun slowly setting, he watched as they were continuously caught in conversation with some of the other players. It was obvious that they were not in the closet at all, and as they finally walked towards Étienne, hand in hand, he felt like this entire trip had been a mistake. Perhaps it would have been better to let Élyse punish him, whatever she could cook up could not have been worse than this.

“Hey, did you see that home run?” Calvin asked excitedly, “I was so proud of you, Ed!”

“Oh well, with the extra practice, even I can hit that ball,” Ed responded modestly, blushing as Calvin gave him a kiss on the forehead.

“It was a good hit,” Étienne added, as he stood up from his place, “However, watching you play has made me very thirsty for some beer.”

XX

Damp from the shower, Calvin walked out onto the porch, carrying two beers, and he silently handed one to Étienne before he plopped down into his seat. “Ed’s still in the shower,” he added, as he cracked the tin open.

“It’s very peaceful sitting here,” Étienne responded, staring out over the garden.

“Well, it is until you think about the fact that I probably should have watered the damn thing before sitting down,” Calvin sighed, “Eh… I will tell Ed to when he comes out.”

“Water? Why now?”

“Ed has this philosophy that if you water it at night, the plants have a full evening to soak in the water and recover from the hot sun.” he gave a shrug, “I’m not going to question the man who keeps feeding me delicious food, I go where I am told.”

“I could water the garden if you want,” Étienne volunteered, perhaps the buzz of the beer impairing his judgement.

“Don’t start, the minute Ed sees you out there working you will forever be trapped into vegetable labour, picking snap peas, checking out the zucchini,” Calvin responded darkly, “You’re only here for what, another day? Preserve yourself.”

“Hmm… you make it sound like living with Ed is such an inconvenience, being at his beck and call,” perhaps the words came out a little more wistfully than he intended, because he received a rather sharp glance from Calvin.

“Honestly?” Calvin’s tone had suddenly gotten serious, “This has been the best decision I’ve made.”

Shooting him a furtive glance, before he took another sip of his beer, Étienne asked, “How do you handle it?”

“With immense pleasure?”

“No, not Ed. I meant, living away from your city, don’t you get homesick?” his fingers were clutching the can firmly, indents forming where they were pressing in.

“Hmm…” Calvin gazed out across the garden, “Of course I get homesick, I know I am probably missing out on a lot, but I also make sure to keep in touch… it came down to what I missed more. My city, or Ed. In the end I figured, to hell with it, I’ll live with Edward. I’ll make it work, y’know? Sometimes you just gotta make the least rational decision, and be happy with it.”

“Living with Ed is the least rational decision?”

“Well, yeah of course.” Calvin gave Étienne a sly smile, “Why, is there someone you’re thinking of moving in with? Do spill.”

Flushing, Étienne shook his head, “No, no, don’t misinterpret me, I am simply inquiring out of curiosity. Your arrangement is not… well, it’s not often done in such a manner when it comes to city relationships. Don’t you ever worry that you and Edward will turn awkward in the future?”

“What, like you?”

“Ouch Calvin, no need to shoot arrows at me.”

“Mmm…” finishing his beer, Calvin set it down and stood up, “Well, whatever happens happens, right? I’m going to water the garden now, not too keen on Ed’s look of disappointment.”

Watching Calvin move about the garden, Étienne wondered if the two of them had rehearsed their answers, they sure were similar… or, this thought bothered him. Perhaps they had spent so much time together their thoughts had synched up somehow. Giving up one’s city? He did not think he could ever do such a thing. Not even for lasagna.

Ed appeared behind him, sitting down with his own beer, and smiled fondly out at Calvin watering the plants. His smile got larger when Calvin went to turn off the tap, only to be mobbed by the chickens, who were apparently feeling neglected. With some soft clucks, they followed Calvin up onto the patio and pecked around them, until with a sigh Calvin picked up a large red chicken.

“This is Henrietta,” he informed Étienne, as the chicken happily settled into his lap like a weird housecat, making soft clucks of contentment as he rubbed her under the chin.

Picking up a cream one, Ed gently held it out to Étienne, “This is convenient having you here actually, otherwise I would have to hold two. Do you mind giving Esther a snuggle?”

“Uh…” Setting his beer down, Étienne awkwardly took the chicken, who was regarding him with a beady suspicious eye. “How… does one pet a chicken?”

“Relax,” Ed responded as he picked up the black and white speckled chicken, who had been making rather disgruntled sounds due to the neglect; he sat down, crooning to it. “Mary-Anne here prefers to have her head scratched like so, but I wouldn’t do that with Esther, she has not yet approved of you. With her, gently pet her back as if she’s a feathery cat.”

“A-alright.” Étienne did as he was instructed, the chicken still tense upon his lap. “Does she… peck?”

“Yeah,” Calvin responded not very reassuringly, the chicken on his lap obviously in some type of blissful state from his petting.

“Well, how do I get Esther into the chicken nirvana… Henrietta? Is in.”

“Just pet her, she has to get to know you before chicken nirvana happens,” Ed responded, his own chicken also settling down into a blissful state. Enough for Ed to be able to pick up his beer and take another sip. “Ready for another meeting tomorrow?”

“Ugh, fairly certain Edith is planning on blaming me for the lack of raised bridge somehow,” Étienne decided to weakly joke, “I think Élyse made me come because I am expendable to the city, while without her, Montréal would fall into rack and ruin… so if I end up dead in a ditch it wouldn’t be all bad.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Étienne,” Calvin said, managing to just stifle a yawn, “I’m sure you are just as integral to Montreal as she is, without you there is no party, right?”

“I suppose,” Étienne responded a little surprised at how seriously Calvin seemed to take his comment. It was at this moment that Esther, who apparently did not like how he had scritched her neck, gave him a hard peck, a large ‘BOCK’, and with great offense fluttered down off his lap. “Oww shit.”

“Is it bleeding?” Ed lazily asked, his concern apparently not that much.

“Uhmm… no, just red.”

“Alright…” he gave a yawn, “I think it’s bedtime, long day ahead tomorrow. You should probably wash your hand regardless, for safety.”

“Typically I do wash before bed,” Étienne  responded, as he finished his beer.

“You sure about that? I remember a few times…” Ed trailed off, as he shot a glance towards Calvin, realizing that his tone had taken on a rather suggestive tenor.

Calvin however was sitting there, his eyes half closed, apparently not noticing the sudden stop of Edward. Lazily he cracked an eye open, “A few times what?”

Shit, Calvin had noticed. “Well. How to put it, Étienne  is telling a fib. He has gone to bed without scrubbing his teeth!”

“The horror,” Calvin gave another yawn, the movement making Henrietta ruffle her feathers, before hopping off his lap to join Esther. “Do I need to supervise him tonight?”

Standing up, Étienne  brushed imaginary dirt off his pants, “I am fairly certain I will survive, thank you very much. Goodnight.”

Watching him go in, Ed looked back towards Calvin, a worried expression upon his face.

“Edward, what is it?”

“Are you alright? You didn’t have to invite him over,” he asked his voice low, as if afraid of being overheard.

“Honestly? You should be the one bothered with me, right? Not consulting you about this, aren’t you the one with the complicated relationship?”

“Well… I’m fine.” Gently placing Mary-Anne onto the ground, Ed stood up, and gave Calvin a soft kiss on the lips, “If you have enough energy perhaps we could-?”

“Edward, don’t even question my energy levels. I was ready to jump you halfway through the baseball game…”

Giving a soft giggle as Calvin pulled Ed into his lap for a longer more lingering kiss, they did not notice Étienne standing there in the dark, looking out at them from the kitchen window, glass of water in hand.

#quatschfic #2020 #pc: edmonton #pc: calgary #pc: montreal #pc: fem!edmonton #edith #pc: strathcona

[orcanadian-blog]

I really wanted to draw Oilers Lolita for some reason and I’m still not sure why.

#art #digital #pc: fem edmonton #edith #oilers #hockey #nhl #lolita #fan art #projectcanada cities

[allbeendonebefore]

oh before i forget some random topics about edith that mororo and i talked about on our bike ride as well as other random junk that occurrs to me!!! im glad she’s the subject of curiousité

- she was doing fine on her own until she moved in with ed in 1912 for tax benefits and public transportation- it was a good deal but ed kind of neglected her

- ed bought his current house in the 1940s and lived with edith at least until the end of the 80s

- 1970s was a bad time where a lot of pent up neglect in Strathcona seems to have surfaced, a lot of heritage buildings were gonna be torn down and the like and Ed wasn’t really doing anything about it so she got pretty pissed and fought back

- if you follow quatsch’s writing you know that edie was the one who got ed through his rough decade and took care of him so she stuck around for a while, but i think that 70s issue kindled a bit of passion and reminded her to focus on herself more

- so anyway she maintains a good and close relationship with ed but she moved back to the south side because she needed to get back to her roots but also because ed’s private life is a bit much

- she sells all the extra vegetables and junk he grows and probs pickles the rest for him and deals with the fallout when he decides to try things like urban beekeeping. she is the business practical minded one

- she loves cute things and cats and is v stylish but i feel that she is also the utilitarian sensible aesthetic and very math-y? idk she likes triangles. if ed is dressed well its either an accident or because of her. obvs because im fond of 50s style shes fond of it too also p:

- probably maybe has a tattoo considering all the tattoo places on whyte but i havent decided what or where lol

- supportive of the gays but her own relationship status is murky at best and she doesnt seem to really do seeking but then again she is just a very private person

#projectcanada cities #pc: fem!edmonton #pc: strathcona #pc headcanon

[quatschmachen]

Jam

2020 arc continues

 XXX

 Edith looked over her coffee cup towards the two men.

Her mind drifted to a previous conversation which had resulted in the situation before her. She had been visiting Hally, and it had turned out Élyse had been visiting at the same time. It had turned into an impromptu ladies night with too much wine, terrible romance movies (where they kept yelling at the TV, due to the implausible plots) and catching up on gossip. It was late in the night, after the third bag of munchies had been opened as they were lolling on top of Hally’s bed painting their nails, that Élyse had begun to complain about her brother. Honestly, Edith had been surprised it had taken Élyse so long to get upon this subject. “He is being not himself,” she began as she picked up a potato chip out of the bowl with a pair of chopsticks, in order not to screw up her freshly painted nails, “These past few years he has been…” she waved the potato chip in the air in an attempt to convey the meaning of not right, “Weird.”

Hally, who was bent over, tongue slightly poking out, foot resting on a chair as she painted her nails, muttered, “Isn’t he always weird?”

“This is weird weird,” Élyse popped another chip into her mouth and chewed thinking of what to say, swallowing, she added, “After the big 375 it was as if he got lost? He’s just been drifting around doing the actions of life, but not actually participating in life.” “Well that does happen,” Hally commented, “there are times when things seem purposeless… but then again usually a good vacation puts me into a better mood.”

Élyse snorted, “I thought that would help him, but even after sending him on a well-planned vacation, he came back tanned, with a smile on his face, but two weeks later he was back to drifting around like some lost log. It’s been annoying. He keeps drifting over to my place without even asking about my plans. Very unpleasant to show up to my place with a friend only to have his mopey face sitting on the couch flipping through the TV channels.”

“Maybe he needs a new hobby?” Edith had fatefully piped up, “Ed seems to have really taken to gardening, and his pet chickens. He and Calvin also keep up with local community classes, and baseball.”

Élyse had looked at Edith thoughtfully, “You did mention that their relationship was going irritatingly well.”

“I get hives looking at them,” Edith admitted, “I feel like I am looking at a Mormon Advert but for the perfect Gay love.”

“But didn’t Ed go through a rough patch in the past?” It was tone that was musing, something that Edith did not realize would cause trouble in her near future.

“Yes, but he seems to have really gotten better. Hate to admit it, but I have never seen him happier.” Edith put the finishing touch on her nails, and then looked over to Élyse, noticing the thoughtful expression upon her face.

“So you mean, he is actually connecting with his city? In a healthy manner?”

“Well, he is acting so well adjusted I am starting to suspect Calvin has secretly replaced him with a Stepford Wife robot.”

“Hmm… it’s been a long time since Étienne has fully connected with his own city,” Élyse had sighed, “Edith… do you think if Étienne visited your brother he might be inspired to change his life?”

Edith snorted, “Do you really think that’s a good idea, Élyse? I thought they had had a fight and weren’t socializing.”

“I wouldn’t put it that way…” Élyse had shot Edith a thoughtful look, as if trying to figure out how much she understood about the relationship between Étienne and Edward. “They do get along whenever I see them at meetings, it’s just perhaps they lost touch a little?”

“Élyse for the past few years you have been the one showing up to meetings in my city, when before Étienne seemed to always appear, even if it was an assignment specifically assigned to you,” Edith responded bluntly giving her an exasperated look.

“I think they just need to fuck,” Hally had contributed, stretching after having accomplished the painting of her toenails.

Edith had nearly choked on the chip she had just managed to swallow, and Élyse let out a long-suffering sigh.

“You always suggest fucking as the solution to everything, Hally!” Élyse managed to say in a tired manner.

“Well, it usually works for me!” Hally wiggled her eyebrows suggestively in Élyse’s direction, “Maybe if you weren’t so in love with pastries, I would show you the light.”

“Ed is with Calvin though?” Edith had said tentatively, she did her best to know as little as possible concerning Edward’s sex life. Her life was a lot better that way.

“That doesn’t necessarily mean they are strictly monogamous,” Hally had responded in a sing song voice as she stood up, walking in a penguin like manner to grab her drink.

“What does that mean?” Edith responded sharply.

Picking up her wine, Hally casually swirled it, a mischievous smirk upon her lips as she glanced over to the two of them sitting on her bed, “Well, I can confirm Calvin is a really good lay.”

“EWWWWWWW!!” Edith had shrieked, “I do not need to know this! You didn’t!”

Casually taking a sip of her wine, Hally responded, “Why not? It was a great threesome.”

“I think I’m gonna puke,” came the overdramatic response of Edith.

“Hey I am not going into full details here,” Hally laughed, “I just wanted to defend my position. They aren’t truly monogamous, well in the traditional sense.”

Élyse had been carefully observing the back and forth, an ever more thoughtful expression upon her face, as if an idea had finally taken root.

The idea of which had resulted in a lot of careful planning between Edith and Élyse (the only reason why Edith had gone along with this stupid plan was because Élyse had promised her a pastry tour of Montreal as a reward), and some careful conversations with Calvin.

At first she had been lost as to how to broach the subject. Her relationship with Calvin was friendly, but she had never been the best of friends with him. She knew him well enough that while usually upon first impressions people underestimated his sharp skills of observance, that he was never a man to be trifled with. Ever since he had moved to Edmonton however, their friendship had gradually grown to be closer, enough that every now and then he would come to her place and hang out, catching up with her.

This had been such a moment, as he casually petted her white fluffy cat, whose blue eyes had half closed in pleasure, as he sprawled across her white couch. She was sitting on her dark purple wing-backed chair, feet propped up on the matching ottoman, drinking her tea, wondering how to broach the subject.

“So you think Ed would actually give up baseball for lacrosse?” she asked in response to his conversation.

“Well, I need to discuss it with him, but baseball is getting kind of old for me,” Calvin responded.

“Hmm… talking about old news…”  Edith had decided there was not ever going to be a good time to broach this subject, “I was wondering if you would be willing to do a favour for me?”

“What type of favour?” Calvin had slowed down his petting of Xerxes, his expression curious but cautious.

“Well, it is a favour for Élyse mainly,” she confessed, thinking it better to shift the blame upon the actual target, “She wants to somehow get her stupid brother to visit Edmonton.”

“Ahh…” his response had not seemed favourable at first, a thoughtful expression upon his face, “Why Edmonton?”

“She thinks that seeing how well Ed is adjusting to participating in his city will inspire Étienne to stop being a listless log?”

“Listless log?” Calvin laughed, “What type of expression is that?”

Edith had simply shrugged, “It is how Élyse has described him… apparently, he has not really been connecting with anything for the past few years, especially after the big 375. She implies he has been rather directionless.”

“Isn’t that his usual norm?”

“Well, according to Élyse this is more than usual?”

“Hmm… what would this visit entail?”

“Showing off the chickens? I don’t know, you can make the plan, I was only asked to broach the subject.”

Calvin had frowned, thinking about it, finally responding, “I want to talk to Élyse.”

“Sure.” And with that, the plan had suddenly steamrolled into the situation of today.

She had been shocked when she had first laid eyes upon Étienne when he had entered the meeting room, the concern of Élyse apparent. Étienne did not seem his usual self; even though he was acting normal, there was definitely something off about him.  He was gaunt, as if his entire city was not able to provide food to give him his usual more filled-out complexion, his hair had grown longer, but it was in a manner that indicated he had given up trying to tame it. Even how he was dressed, yes it was professional, but it was not to his usual standard. When he presented in the meeting it was as if any ounce of bravado and confidence was such a forced act that she had a hard time believing that the other people in the room were being convinced by him.

Over the years, as much as she hated to admit it, she had looked up to Étienne, the way he seemed to effortlessly handle various situations. To see him acting so… off bothered her. She noticed that Edward had been shooting him some concerned glances as well, which definitely meant something was wrong. It had bothered her as she had gone home, bothered her as she chatted to her friends, and bothered her as she entered for the second day of meetings.  She hoped that if perhaps she laid into him some of his spark would return to defend himself. Instead she had been watching him slowly crumble in front of her, his defense tired as if even he could not be bothered to believe in himself anymore. It did not make her feel better about the situation at all.

It was the morning coffee break, after she had seemed to strip him of any bravado (she was not doing this for pleasure, she had to defend her own interests as well,) when Étienne had turned towards her brother, expression tired, his hand slightly shaking as reached out to pick up his coffee.  

Except he missed completely, his fingers instead of wrapping around his coffee cup banged right into it, causing it to tip the contents across the table and onto his lap, dripping onto the floor in a cascading waterfall and into his partially open suitcase. As he comprehended the situation, his expression changed from shock to one of ‘please kill me now’ as he leapt up, quickly moving his suitcase out of the line of fire, as well as moving any of the files on the table away from impending doom.

Edward had also leapt to action, going towards the kitchenette in the corner and grabbing the roll of paper towels, dashing forward and mopping up the table, floor, and finally, once the major crisis had been averted, dabbing Étienne’s shirt.

“Are you alright? You aren’t burnt, are you?” the question was low, and thankfully many of the other people of the meeting had already left the room for their various break needs to even witness this embarrassing scene.

Étienne had briefly closed his eyes as if trying to call upon God for strength to continue, before his hand moved up to remove the paper towel from Ed’s hand, “I’m fine. However I fear I will be spending the rest of today a monument to my disaster.” Here he made a futile gesture to his white shirt which had the brown coffee splatter across it.

Ed had stood back, considering him, “I think I can help with the shirt at least…” he had glanced at her, “Do you mind finishing the clean up while I get Étienne back into form?”

Deciding that this was preferable as well as feeling mildly guilty, Edith had simply nodded in acquiescence.

XXXXX

“Where are you taking me?” Étienne asked as Ed firmly grabbed his hand leading him out of the conference room.

“My office, idiot, I think I have a suit jacket at least that can cover up the worst of this,” he responded as he guided them to the elevator.

“Office?”

“Of course I have an office? Where else do you think I get work done? A bush?” the last part was asked lightly, a teasing note that apparently was lost upon the other man.

“No.” Étienne responded feeling a little stung. “I just… haven’t had an official office in years…”

The elevator dinged, and they got in. It was empty, and as the doors closed, Ed finally let go of Étienne’s hand, however he did not move it far, their fingers still brushing as he turned to look at the other man carefully.

“You telecommute?”

“No. I just don’t really bother with city business that much anymore,” came the soft admission, Étienne looking intensely at a corner, shoulders slumping even more as if admitting this was just placing another burden upon himself. So far it had not been the best of mornings for him, what from seeing Love’s Young Dream interact over breakfast, to the aggressive person on the bus who had elbowed him in the gut… to trying to avoid any in depth conversations with Ed… to being torn apart during the meeting… It was only 11:00 am and Étienne already wanted to return to bed.

“You mean you’re letting these intergenerational yahoos have free reign?” a light question, it seemed as if Calvin’s slang was rubbing off on Ed which somehow made Étienne feel even worse.

“Maybe I trust my people more than you?” a sharp response, one that indicated he did not want to talk about this subject anymore.

Ed’s fingers tentatively rubbed against Étienne’s, the touch comforting but also trying to gauge his feelings, he asked quietly “Or you trust Élyse to do all the work?”

Sparing a brief glance, he quickly looked away, hating how intensely Ed was looking at him. Stiffly looking forward, Étienne said, “That isn’t fair, Edward. There is no contract claiming that we need to dedicate our lives to boring city work.”

“Right. Sorry.” Edward shifted away slightly, his hand brushing up against Étienne’s as he moved it to adjust his shirt sleeve, fumbling with the buttons.  The gap between them was suddenly colder, and Étienne wished he had not been so sharp. “I guess I was used to you being more interested in the events of your city…”

“Maybe I wanted a change.”

Their conversation was cut short as the elevator opened, and Ed promptly stepped out leading Étienne over to his cubicle.

“I thought you said ‘office’?”  Étienne asked, looking around the small cubicle with curiosity. It was a cubicle that sat on that boundary between organized and a mess. Upon his desk was a work computer, sticky notes stuck all over the monitor reminding him of various tasks, the paper flowing onto the cloth cubicle siding, interspersed with various photographs. There was a cute one of the three chickens dressed up in little Oilers jerseys, another of him and Calvin leaning against Calvin’s truck, cowboy hats on, smiling at the person taking the photo, once more Calvin had his arm casually around Edward’s shoulder indicating how Perfect their relationship was. He looked away from the other photos, not wanting to see them, looking at the little black paper tower on Ed’s desk with various files placed on the levels.  Next to Ed’s computer lay a diagram, which looked as if it was showing trees lining some sort of pedestrian boulevard. Reading the scrawled writing, he made out the words “Lilac Lane?” before once more his attention was drawn towards Edward.

“What did you mean about office?”

“Well, I thought you would be separate? Closed door?”

“Ah. Well, I did have one like that but I found it too isolating. I prefer the cubicle, puts me on a more even ground and I get to be caught up on all the gossip,” he briefly smiled at Étienne, “How else could I keep up on the ongoing drama of Moab’s life?”

Ed had opened up a tall tan metal cabinet, which was housing an extra pair of shoes, the promised suit jacket, and a rather whimsical blue shirt with a repeating pineapple print upon it.

“Oh I forgot about this…” Ed pulled out the shirt, and looked over to Étienne, “This is from one of the theme days. The theme was tropical vacation… this should fit you.”

Étienne stared at the shirt for a moment, a look of distaste upon his face. Of course the print would be pineapples, he thought with sour memories. However the dampness of his shirt was bothering him, and with a sigh, he reluctantly he removed his shirt, placing it upon Ed’s desk, next to the open file and put the  pineapple shirt on. It fit rather well, the shoulders were a bit off but not so much that it caused a problem. Quickly he buttoned it up, wondering what else this day had in store for him.

“Wonderful, you look amazing, as if you are about to embark on a trip to Tofino,” Ed laughed, “Do you need the suit jacket as well?”

Making a face at Edward, Étienne grumbled, “Yes, I need to hide as much of this ugly print as possible.”

“Excuse me, this print is a Value Village two-dollar special!” came the mock offended tone as Ed grabbed the grey suit jacket, which did not match Étienne’s black pants at all. The end result was rather comic, but at least Étienne was not reeking of coffee anymore.

“What’s this Lilac Lane?” Étienne asked indicating the open file upon Ed’s desk.

“Oh? Well I want to have a place where people can view flowers in the spring, maybe make a flower festival?”

Raising an eyebrow, Étienne responded in a teasing tone, “Spring? Flowers? Edmonton?”

“Hey! Just because my flowers emerge a month after everyone else’s doesn’t mean they are worth any less for viewing,” Ed huffed, “They just take a little longer to develop and become more beautiful!”

Étienne’s response was cut short, when a head popped up from one of the nearby cubicles, revealing a spotty young redheaded man, whose lips were rather thick.

“Ed! How’s the meeting going?”

“Oh you know, Edith is about ready to murder me and Étienne here.”

The man looked over to Étienne as if he had just noticed him. His look was questioning and Edward hastily added, “He is representing Montreal interests concerning the transit, providing a different perspective.”

“You mean like he did with the NAIT line?” a skeptical tone.

Sensing that this might turn into a battle, Ed added, “Look Joe, we really need to get back to the meeting, I’ll catch you up later alright?”

“Sure. Maybe we can do coffee next week?”

“Sounds great, c’mon Étienne,” Ed said as they left his cubicle. As he was passing by some of the other cubicles various coworkers greeted him, trying to catch up, which Ed hastily explained they had to return to the meeting.

Silently Étienne observed these interactions contemplating how well liked Edward was. It was obvious that he had formed rather lasting friendships with his officemates. It felt like Edward was living in another universe in some ways. As they entered the meeting room, Étienne steeled himself.

XXXX

Edward had nearly forgotten Étienne’s soiled shirt in the cubicle, and they were already out of the elevator when he had told Étienne to ‘stay’ as he rushed back towards it in order to grab it.

Standing there, Étienne idly checked his phone, his mood lifting as he noticed Isa had texted him, it was rather cheeky and she was inquiring when he would visit her.

He texted back, pleasantly surprised when her response was rapid, and he spent some time teasingly flirting with her, until Ed appeared rather red in the face.

“Sorry about that, had to grab your shirt, let’s go… though I guess we missed the first bus home.”

It was probably a slip up, Étienne thought, as placed his phone into his pocket, calling the place home. Including Étienne into that idea of home. While the conversation with Isa had temporarily lifted his mood, it once more took a downturn as they entered Ed’s house, and he realized that he had not managed to dry out all the documents in his brief case.

He ended up laying them out across the kitchen table, painstakingly separating some of the sticky pages. Thankfully his tablet had been spared.

What made things worse was when Calvin entered and burst out laughing at Étienne’s shirt, asking when the Pineapple Express was due. Ed had appeared then and ordered them out of the kitchen so that he could make them dinner.

Étienne had absconded to his room to change out of the offensive shirt and quickly shower in order to remove any remnants of coffee from his body. It was at this point that he realized he had forgotten to bring in any clothes to the washroom, so he hastily wrapped himself in a towel, and went to make the short, but also agonizingly long dash, to the guest bedroom, a route that passed by the living room, where Calvin was sitting.

The dirty clothes over one arm, Étienne’s steps were rapid, and as he passed by, he glanced over to Calvin, who had looked up, a mild look of surprise at his state, but the moment was brief.

Thankful to change into his other pair of pants, the ones he had brought for lounging around in, Étienne left his room and, not knowing where else to go, entered the living room. He was pleasantly surprised that Calvin had thoughtfully grabbed him a beer.

Settling down onto the couch opposite of Calvin he looked over to the TV, realizing it was the news. Dread took him as Calvin lowered the volume, the intention of conversation obvious.

“How was the transit meeting today? What happened to cause you to change shirts?”

“Ugh, it was horrible. Managed to spill coffee all over myself,” Étienne responded.

“I hate when that happens, usually it occurs at the very moment you want to look the most impressive.” Calvin sighed sympathetically. “Luckily I am an expert at getting stains out of clothing, so if you put your soiled clothes into the laundry basket I will clean it up.”

“You?” Étienne frowned.

Chuckling, Calvin said, “What, you think Ed is the perfect house husband? The last time he did laundry he managed to turn one of my shirts pink. I am not entirely sure if it was a mistake or on purpose…”

“So when did you become such an expert on stains?” his curiosity was piqued and he shifted his leg, moving up onto the couch as he looked more fully at Calvin.

“Well, rodeo riding is not kind to one’s clothing, I was forced to become an expert on stains, especially since Caroline informed me I was on my own for that.” This was said with no malice, instead a large grin was upon Calvin’s face as he said this.

“Sound’s like something Élyse would do,” Étienne responded with a small responding smile.

“Ah well, it made me more independent.”

Their conversation was interrupted when Ed popped his head in to inform them dinner was ready. As they entered the kitchen Étienne noticed that the papers had moved and were hung up on a string, clipped up with little clothing pins. The table was neatly laid and in the middle of it was a pot of beef stew and some crusty buns.

Sitting down, Étienne tucked in, the food managing to banish some of the yuckiness of the day, the conversation between them pleasant.

However, once more it drifted to Étienne’s hair.

“It’s looking wild,” Ed was insisting as Calvin cleared up the dishes. Ed had moved next to Étienne, his fingers tangling into the locks, “There are split ends everywhere, do you even use a conditioner?!”

“Ed, my hair is fine,” Étienne had gone rather stiff, not sure how to act in front of Calvin, who had turned to look at them, his expression inscrutable. Feeling Ed’s fingers tangling in his hair was bringing back too many memories which he had worked hard to supress.

“I think you ought to let him cut it, or at least trim it,” Calvin said as he casually wiped his hands on the red checked kitchen towel, “He is going to bother you the rest of the time you are here until you give in, trust me, I know.”

“His hair is looking too wild, isn’t it Calvin?”

Glancing between the two men, Calvin shrugged, “No opinion, I opt out of this test!”

“Incorrigible!” Ed responded, as he looked to Étienne, “Isn’t he? The worst.”

“I am only agreeing to you because you are currently holding my hair captive.” Étienne responded as he jokingly mouthed ‘please save me’ in Calvin’s direction.

“Oh right,” Ed released his grip and stood up, “So what do you say? Just a little trim…”

“Hmmm, well I trust when Calvin informs me you won’t let up, alright.” Étienne sighed giving an over exaggerated shrug of defeat. “Where do you want me?”

“Stay here!” Ed had dashed out of the kitchen.

Calvin sat back down into his seat, another beer in his hand. “Don’t be too worried, he is rather good at this.”

“I’m not worried.” Étienne responded, and he was surprised when he realized he wasn’t. He trusted Ed, knew that he would not end up with a terrible hair cut.

A few moments later, Ed returned with a cape which he placed around Étienne to capture his hair, a razor, a comb and some scissors.

“What do you want?”

“Hmmm… a trim. I am quite keen on keeping my hair longer,” Étienne responded.

“Your wish is my command!” Ed gently spritzed Étienne’s hair with some water, his fingers gently combing through the mass of curls, the comb laying neglected upon the table. The actions were soothing, and Étienne tried to remember how many times Ed had played with his hair, the moments coming back to him, and he realized they were too innumerable to count. He closed his eyes, pretending that the situation was different. The soft snips were constant, as he listened to the conversation between Ed and Calvin, as they discussed various topics, from the chickens to a future meeting that Calvin had to participate in down in Calgary.  

He was disappointed when he felt Ed fluff his hair, put the scissors down, and step away.

“Done!” sounding pleased with himself, Ed handed Étienne a mirror, and then held another up behind his head, lining them up so that Étienne could see the full effect.

His hair, which had looked neglected, now was neat. Perhaps the trim was a tad shorter than he would have preferred, but it looked rather good, and Étienne thought with mild amusement that he now looked like a well cared for poodle.

“It looks good, thank you,” Étienne set the mirror down, and as he stood up, he awkwardly worked to take the cape off, which resulted in him somehow dumping hair down his pants. “Urgh… now my legs are itchy.”

“You should have waited until I told you to stand up,” Ed responded as he swept the hair off the floor.

“I don’t have any clean pants,” Étienne sighed as he tried to beat some of the hair off of them.

“You can borrow some of mine,” Calvin responded, “I have some sweat pants which should fit.”

Before Étienne could respond, Calvin had left the room and returned with a pair of maroon sweatpants.

“Thanks,” taking them, Étienne left the room and changed. He then followed Calvin’s advice and placed his dirty clothing items into the laundry basket.  He glanced at the clock and realized it was still too early to go to bed, but he was not so keen to return to the kitchen. On a whim, he slipped on his shoes and stepped out into the backyard, lit up by the slowly setting sun. He wandered over to the chickens and squatted nearby, watching as they pecked and scratched the dirt.

Henrietta looked at him curiously and waddled up to him, wanting attention. Tentatively he reached out and stroked her back. Her eyes closed in contentment, and he found himself being bapped on the knee by Mary-Anne who also apparently wanted some attention. He shifted making sure he was balanced as he petted the two chickens who were making soft crooning sounds.

In the distance however, Esther stood apart, looking at him suspiciously. Étienne petted them until his legs began to lock up, and he reluctantly had to stand.

As he stretched, Esther waddled a little further from him.

“Hey you,” Étienne said to her, “You are going to have to accept me at some point.” He was not sure why he had even said such a thing, but he was suddenly invested in making this chicken like him.

As he took a step forward, thinking of picking her up, he heard Calvin’s voice pipe up, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you—”

It was a warning too late, as Étienne’s hands neared Esther, she had fluffed up and pecked him hard before scurrying away.

Swearing, Étienne stood up and looked accusingly towards Calvin, who was squatting in a flower bed, hat on head, and weeding.

“How long have you been here?”

Calvin shrugged, “A while. Before you came out… I was curious was to what you were doing with the chickens… so I admit it, I spied. Don’t worry about your clothes, I popped them into the wash.”

“Oh…” Étienne flushed as he remembered the words he had said to Esther and hoped that Calvin would not put too much interest in them.

“Did you know that you can make jam out of just about anything?” Calvin asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You can make jam out of beetroots! At first when Ed suggested it I was skeptical, because, what the hell? Beetroots in jam?” Calvin was digging up another weed, and he paused as he took a moment to pull it out. “But it turned out I was pleasantly wrong. He even makes a mean beetroot chutney…”

“You speak of these jams as if I know them,” Étienne responded, “And I have not even sampled the chocolate cherry...”

“Really? Geez you are slow, there the jam was on the table in front of you like a prize and you didn’t even open it to take a dab?” Calvin rolled his eyes, “You better watch out or else I am going to eat it all.”

“Fine… you have convinced me… I am going to take a dab as you say,” Étienne responded, “See if what you say is true.”

“Hell, why would I lie to you, Étienne?” Calvin rubbed some sweat off his face, which only left a large smear of dirt on his cheek. “Though if I were smart, I would not rave about Ed’s cooking, you might just end up staying, due to being so fat you can’t even fit on an airplane!”

“I doubt that I will gain that much weight from three days, Calvin,” Étienne replied as he rolled his eyes. He walked back to the house, and entered it. He listened trying to figure out where Ed was, but as he entered the kitchen he found him there making lunch for the next day.

Glancing around the kitchen Étienne wondered where the jam would be kept, he decided it was probably easier to ask Ed, and he walked up to him.

Hearing his footsteps, Ed looked up from the stew he was ladling into a container, and softly said, “Hey.”

“Hey… do you know where the jam is? I want to try the chocolate cherry.”

A guilty look crossed Ed’s face, “Oh… I ate it all…”

“You… what?”

The guilt broke into a mischievous smirk, “As if, it’s in the cabinet over there…”

“You are bad Ed, you should know not to get between a man and his jam, otherwise there could be consequences!” Étienne warned as he opened the cupboard indicated and pulled out the jam.

“Oh? Like what?” Ed’s tone had turned mildly flirtatious, and Étienne chanced a glance at him. Ed was not even looking at him, instead he was screwing the lid on the containers and placing them into the lunch boxes.

“Waking up in bed covered in my hair?” Étienne threatened thinking of all the hair that had been swept up and placed in the garbage.

“Been there done that, need a better threat.” came the absentminded reply.

“I meant with my hair clippings not with me,” Étienne tried to clarify suddenly feeling embarrassed. He was having the weird feeling that they were having two entirely different conversations.

As he placed the boxes into the refrigerator, Ed looked over to Étienne, his expression confused. “Why your hair clippings… oh... ok... right. I suppose that would be weird, I mean, usually when I find hair in my bed it’s not from the garbage…”

“I think you are taking this threat too literally.” Étienne popped the lid off the jam, and then he dabbed his finger into it and popped it into his mouth, eyes closing briefly as bliss as the sweet and tangy taste hit his tongue. Calvin had been correct, this was the best goddam jam ever. No wonder he ate the stuff out of the jar.

“Well?” the question was tentative, and it took a moment for Étienne to figure out what the hell Ed was asking about.

Opening his eyes he looked over to him, “Delicious.” He scooped more out with his finger and sucked it, “This entire jar is mine now, not sharing at all.”

Flushing in pleasure at the compliment, Ed looked away, busying himself with folding the kitchen towel. “Thank you.”

“Hmm?”

“You complimenting the food mean you genuinely like it… it’s good to know I can make something that can please you.” He was still folding the towel, the movements slow, contemplative.

“Of course it’s genuine, what do I have to gain except more food?” Étienne teased, “It’s not as if I can get into your pants with any old compliment anymore.”

“Oh my god Étienne,” Ed laughed, “I am going to check the chickens, please don’t eat the entire jar in one go, you would get sick from all the sweetness.”

Licking his lips, Étienne responded, “I am an adult, I can do what I want to.”

“Well don’t expect me to be handing you a hot water bottle when your tummy aches,” Ed warned as he left the kitchen.

“I won’t,” Étienne responded too softly for Ed to hear. As he took another scoop of jam the feeling of emptiness returned. Ed and Calvin had a life, and assigned duties. He had no idea what was expected of him, what he should be doing. He was a guest, being taken care of, no need to contribute. Was it allowed for him to sit in the living room alone? Play a game of pool? Were they expecting him outside?

He moved and glanced out the kitchen window into the backyard, watching as Ed paused by Calvin, their conversation brief, before he moved to inspect the coop, make sure that the chickens were well watered and fed. An idyllic scene that did not include him, he thought. Where did he fit in? He had been oozing around his own city like a ghost, acting in repeated habits, but with a feeling of no longer being a part of it. Wherever he went the feeling lingered. He stood there watching them until he had finished the jar, his finger pressing against the glass scooping for any remaining parts of it. It was not intentional to finish the jar, his mind had been preoccupied. With a sigh, knowing that Ed would probably scold him, he placed it into the sink and washed his hands. Perhaps he could just go back to the guest bedroom and hide in there, pretend he had gone to bed early.

His thoughts were disrupted when the two men entered the house again, laughing over some story.

Calvin glanced into the kitchen, “Hey Et! We’re going to catch up on some TV, care to join?”

Not sure what else to say, he agreed. TV at least was low maintenance.

#quatschfic #pc: edmonton #pc: strathcona #pc: montreal #pc: calgary #pc: halifax #pc: fem!montreal #2020

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WHEN WILL I BE STOPPED

#projectcanada cities #pc: fem!edmonton #pc: calgary #hapo doodles #graphite #traditional art #greek mythology #minotaur #comic

[acetechne]

tfw you notice your sis has been stealing your cookies and reading your trashy novel over your shoulder for god knows how long

#projectcanada cities #pc: edmonton #pc: fem!edmonton #femonton #hapo art #digital art #photoshop #edmas