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schmirius · 5 months

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okay but what if... a different ofmd s2

I tried several times to make a less tl;dr version of this post, but it's not happening. BEHOLD: a season I just like better. It fixes things that I personally didn't like (and I have a strong Ed and Izzy bias). I wanted to do a few major things:

Keep 2x01-2x03, because I love them so damn much. this unfortunately sets the stakes *really high* for the rest of the season, so...

Rework the characters that canon s2 introduced, to be able to focus more tightly on the Revenge's response to the 2x01-2x03 atom bomb.

Give Ed and Stede more focused arcs (individually and as a couple). Ed and Stede were, emotionally, at completely opposite poles in 2x01-2x03, and in canon I think they didn't connect much after that. So in my version, they'll do basic work to understand why their s1 meet-cute failed and how they can move on to having a real relationship.

Address Ed's very vividly depicted violence from 2x01-2x02. I found the amends depicted in canon somewhere between "unsatisfying" and "horrifying." Jesus did I need to fuck around with that!

the three major acts in the season:

ACT 1 (2x01-2x03) – Trauma! These episodes remain largely the same as in canon.

ACT 2 (2x04-2x06) – Recovery I've edited these episodes so Ed + Stede are entirely separated from Izzy + the Crew. This gives the OTP space to work on themselves and their relationship. Likewise, Izzy has space away from Ed to go through his arc of self-discovery and consider if he wants to reconcile with Ed. Izzy and the Crew all get a chance to recover from The Trauma on their own, together as a community. ACT 3 (2x07-2x08) – Reconciliation Act 2 has given everybody time to process Act 1 and how they might come out of it as better versions of themselves and a stronger community. Now the OTP and the Crew reintegrate and, in the 2x08 climax, prove all their work has been worth it by fighting together against an external menace. (It's Hornigold. It's got to be Hornigold. This is so obvious to me.)

* * * THE CHARACTERS:

Each crew member is talented brilliant incredible showstopping spectacular, but in the interest of brevity, the characters in the imaginary episodes are going to be:

Ed and Stede → The OTP – Ed and Stede as a couple. Color-coded red so you can follow their arc.

Izzy

The Crew, who begin in Act 1 as three separate crews: → the Castaways (everybody Ed marooned/tossed overboard at the end of s1) → the Breakup Boat (everybody from canon s2 on the Revenge with Truly Insane Ed → the Girls (introduced below)

THE BOATS:

Most episodes are going to have two plots running, taking place on two ships:

The Revenge

The Pearl Diver (again, below)

Last terminology note: I'm going to be comparing "canon episodes" vs. "imaginary episodes" or "new episodes" a bunch.

Ready? Alright, let's kick it.

* * *

ACT 1 – 2x01-2x03 – TRAUMAAA

Ed + the Breakup Boat: The action on the Revenge remains basically the same, with the torture and the murder-suicides and all the crimes. Stede + the Castaways: I'd cut the Republic of Pirates in 2x01. Instead, I'd start with everyone at sea on the ship that rescued them (which also creates an atmosphere of everyone still being trapped by the awful shit that happened in 1x10). What ship? I think introducing Zheng the historical pirate is a really cool idea, but I also think it's one idea too many. Zheng's objectively cooler and more successful ship is always, implausibly, overshadowed by the lovable misfits on the Revenge, since the Revenge is the workplace that the show is about. This is annoying to me (and probably Zheng). Instead I'd make the rescue ship one of equal goofiness: Mary and Anne's ship. I'll call it the Pearl Diver, just because I can. We can lift the formula from Ed's ship in s1:

s1: gay men // s2: lesbians!

s1 power couple on the ship is Ed+Izzy // s2 is Mary/Anne

s1 crew members who later join Revenge are The Boys, Fang+Ivan // s2 will have the Girls, a surgeon and her competent sailor girlfriend. one of them is a trans woman, I said so

the set is just the Revenge with different props on, lol

Okay, that's our lesbian ship set up. It'll last five episodes and be a very easy foil for the Revenge. Stede: His 2x01-2x02 bit seemed to be "I love Ed, I'll get back to him no matter." I'd push that harder. New s2 will open with Stede as a brave romantic adventurer sallying forth into true love (the same way he was a brave romantic adventurer sallying forth into piracy in s1). So: "I love Ed, I'll get back to him no matter, and the force of our newfound love will be what straightens this all out." The OTP: Ed and Stede are both hopeless romantics, of course, but they're coming at it from opposing genres. Ed thinks he's the doomed villain in a big-R Romantic novel. Stede thinks he's the little-r romantic hero in a bodice-ripper. Their job in new s2 is to shift ideas of self & genre to meet somewhere in the middle.

ACT 2 – 2x04-2x06 – RECOVERY

I think a lot of what s2 tried in mid-season succeeded, but it didn't really add up to anything. In order to advance Ed and Stede's arc(s), I'd isolate them from the Crew. This gives everyone space to start clearing up the Act 1 wreckage.

(quick 2x03 note:) The major change I'd make here here would be moving the Breakup Boat crew off of the Revenge sometime mid-episode so they can recuperate on the Pearl Diver instead. They get to leave the trauma boat, which gives them and us the audience some breathing room as we transition out of the murder-suicide portion of the season. In the Pearl's infirmary they meet the Girls – surgeon and girlfriend – and reunite with the Castaways. There's a palpable sense of each group feeling isolated from the others.

2x04 – really intense cleanup

Time skip: The Breakup Boat crew have been declared physically recovered enough to start repairing the Revenge (and therefore prepared to grit their teeth and return to the scene of their trauma). The Castaways offer to help; the Girls come along in solidarity with their new friends. The Revenge: (this is also 2x04 in canon) Izzy never left the wrecked ship, is doing Bad. The three separate crews do ship repairs, but then come together as one Crew to declare Izzy their unicorn.

The Pearl Diver: (this story has no equivalent in canon)

Ed: never leaves the Pearl's infirmary, is doing Bad. He's trying to come to grips with the fact that he did all that shit, the kind that his dad and Hornigold used to. Stede: is focused on telling Ed about their true love rather than trying to understand how awful Ed feels, to the point that he's telling his newfound love~ story super loudly to avoid talking about Ed's pain.

The OTP: They have a moment where they stop talking past each other.

Ed hears Stede when he says that he really does love Ed. (Ed doesn't necessarily believe it, but he's willing to listen.)

Stede hears Ed when Ed says he feels trapped worse than ever (though he's weirded out Ed thinks he's a doomed villain). (Stede, our favorite Ed stan, literally doesn't care what Ed did except as far as how Ed feels about it.)

2x05 – letting loose

Time skip! Again, everyone looks slightly less haggard. The Revenge: (this is 2x06 in canon; I've moved it to 2x05) The Crew: have Calypso's birthday, paid for with the treasure they wouldn't throw overboard in 2x01 because it's their treasure and not Ed's, ffs. Joyful, queer, "we're surviving, we're getting through this together." Izzy+Ed: I'm aiming to untangle the shitty parts of their codependency and eliminate Ed's outright domestic abuse. I read canon s2 as Izzy fully untangling himself from Ed and then presenting Ed as a gift to Stede, and I did not like that for anyone. I'm aiming to conclude new s2 with Izzy+Ed acknowledging how bad it was at the end (with a little more emotional insight than they might have been able to do in s1 – maybe this huge event in their lives leads to self-reflection and growth!) and how they could move forward maybe as very complicated friends. Izzy's going to be taking the lead on this one, because the codependency very much ended in Ed doing violence to him. He gets to decide what the fuck happens. So: Izzy: is finally somewhere without Ed, first time in 30 years. Now that he's been unicorn'd (feels supported), he has room to unwind and start discovering what he might like to do. So he does drag. And also sings about his complicated feelings for Ed, come on, Izzy has love for him. In new s2, Izzy still gets to bloom, but he remains closer in personality to his grumpy cunty s1 self, not quite consciously understanding how he's changing. The Pearl Diver: (this is 2x04 in canon; I've moved it to 2x05) The OTP: have the bonkers Mary/Anne dinner party (their f/f co-captain counterparts). They do their awkward exes bit. In canon s2, they see Mary/Anne as "these guys are so weird, wtf"; in new s2, they're more like "these guys are so weird, omg. remember how weird we were last year? that was so fucking great." Conclusions:

Ed and Stede have more in common than they'd feared (since, like, 1x10)

They see they can be dramatic assholes in love like these bitches and that's great.

But also: maybe they need to be less self-centered than "burn down your ship which is your entire livelihood without considering that this might kill your crew." Maybe Mary/Anne rowing off cackling in a boat together (to, say, China) isn't the W they thought it was.

also also: caught up in the adrenaline of understanding they're mad lads, Ed/Stede do the impulsive "taking it too fast" (canon: 2x06) and BONE.

Lastly: The OTP ask to reboard the Revenge now that there's no Pearl Diver, mentioning hopefully that they've learned a lesson. The Crew are not convinced. They maroon Ed/Stede on land at close of ep.

2x06 – restucturing

The Revenge: (this plot is similar to Izzy+Stede's story in canon's 2x05)

Haven't thought of a frame story I like here, honestly. But the point of the episode is that Izzy helps Crew to be better pirates. This does two things:

Izzy's getting a chance to choose to manage people for himself, rather than as Ed's minder or Ed's goon.

Crew are getting competent advice from someone who genuinely gives a shit (Stede or Ed do not fit the bill). This allows them to keep running things in a fairly democratic structure where they do make decisions based on actually, for real, Talking Things Through.

Crew: consider what they're going to do about Ed and Stede – who maybe have had time to sort themselves out a bit? – replete with silly company restructuring metaphors.

Izzy: probably does shirtless swordplay considers how he wants to deal with Ed. Talking to Crew he decides that he, too, can try airing grievances with Ed in workplace metaphors. (It doesn't take much to convince him. Izzy will always love being a professional.)

On Land: (this episode has no equivalent in canon)

The OTP: in true OFMD style, they attend a modern couples retreat that has 18th c trappings. It is run by the straightest dude ever (Steve Carell levels of Kinsey 1 in 18th c khakis).

This dude is obnoxious, but he does remind them to strike a balance between demonstrating their love by talking through their needs (e.g. 2x04 infirmary, 2x05 dinner party) and by taking action (which will always be bonkers for them, like 1x09 act of grace, 2x05 impulsive boning). I'm thinking of it like: Ed/Stede realize they're whim-prone (as in canon 2x04), and also there's this tool nearby.

They're like, hey, actually I really love you, and make out sappily for a while then wonder, bemusedly, why they didn't do that before fucking a bunch. ("but the fucking was still good?" "oh yeah mate, we should definitely always be fucking")

Unfortunately: The retreat ends abruptly when they spot pirate hunters closing in on the B&B and have to make a run for it.

ACT 3 – 2x07-2x08 – RECONCILIATION

I really couldn't tell what canon was going for at season's end, starting from about "Stede kills Lowe" at the end of 2x06. I found a lot of it contradictory and kind of ass-pull-y. Major divergences to follow.

2x07 – reintegration

(this episode is similar to canon episode 2x05)

The Revenge: Having spent 2x06 thinking about what they want to do next, the Crew decide they can take on Stede + Ed on their flight from pirate hunters. Everyone's back on the boat. I'd probably make the frame story here something silly and light-hearted like the Cursed Red Suit. Everyone can mingle in groups that are different from the ones they started out in during Act 1 – permutations of people from the three distinct crews, Stede and Izzy and Ed thrown together with people they haven't seen in a while. These different groups can brainstorm deeply stupid solutions to this probably fake problem. I'd probably make the frame story here something silly and light-hearted like The Cursed Red Suit. Everybody can mingle in different groups and brainstorm deeply stupid solutions to this probably fake problem. Ed/Stede: Crucially, Stede and Ed aren't together in any of these groups. They separate and see everyone and understand that they're not, actually, in charge of Crew anymore. It's weird but okay. They both have to legitimately listen like they've been practicing all season. Ed doesn't apologize but he at least doesn't fuck with anyone, so that's... fine. Izzy+Ed: They haven't seen each other since the murder-suicide farrago in 2x02.

Izzy: "You can do the big gestures but you're a shit captain, Ed. You can't be there on the everyday stuff." (with subtext: you need to give a shit about me all the time, not just when I can be convenient to you.) It's not any kind of forgiveness, and Ed can't offer an apology because he still doesn't understand them. But this is Izzy saying he'll talk to Ed (with more pushback than canon's 2x06 "oh look it's scowly face").

Lastly: This has been a monster of the week ep where the first five minutes were like, there's a problem which will affect us in the future! and then the middle of the episode is, but it's not affecting us right now so let's do interpersonal stuff! Sadly, whoever they dump the Suit on at the end of the episode reminds them the problem still exists: the pirate hunters are worse than they thought. Hornigold is on their trail.

2x08 – IT'S REAL PERSONAL

(this episode has no equivalent in canon.) And here we reach the locus of all my frustrations!

Nose Guy doesn't exist in new s2, so we don't need to blow up the Republic with no foreshadowing as in canon 2x08

Zheng's awesome fleet doesn't exist in new s2. The foreshadowing that she was planning something incredible doesn't have to come to nothing like it did in canon 2x08, when her fleet also blew up with no foreshadowing. (what was that badass montage from canon 2x02 of her crew portaging ships thru the jungle even for ;_;)

Canon s2's sudden decision to make the stakes of the entire season "oh, uh, everyone wants to destroy piracy?" and completely ignore all the interpersonal problems set up in Act 1 – that doesn't happen!

Probably nothing in imaginary s2 will be as intense as 2x01-2x03 were. But new 2x08 will be a claustrophobic, high-pressure situation where everyone will have the resolutions they made in Act 2 tested, in a situation as dangerous as the worst of Act 1.

HERE WE GOOOOO Cold open on the Revenge:

A scene that looks about as bad as Ed's storm in 2x02: Izzy is dead from a headshot, Crew are panicking, Stede is alone and can only shout to Ed that he loves him from far away.

Ed is kitted out as Blackbeard at his worst – makeup and all – and seems ready to, again, blow the whole ship up. Viewer is perhaps worried that Ed has, again, lost it. We balance on the precipice!!

TITLE CARD!

Chronological start of ep:

Wind back the action!

Time skip from 2x07: The Revenge has been running from Hornigold for weeks, hiding themselves in ever smaller spaces as they get jumpier and jumpier about the pursuit. (Think on deck → main cabin → galley → the secret fucking deathbed under the galley.)

Ed, off by himself, is beside himself at the thought of meeting Hornigold for real once more. He failed to kill him all those years ago – what must he do now to solve the problem for good?

Intercut with Hornigold's ship:

Hornigold is chasing them, being a dick in his sumptious cabin. It's light on the action, heavy on letting us know who he is.

He's cruel and violent, like Act 1 Ed, except (a) he's less concerned about covering up his awfulness with charm and (b) he's perfectly open about "I hate this guy I used to own and I want to kill him" (about Ed) in contrast to Act 1 Ed not being able to say anything of the sort about Stede or Izzy.

We already know what kind of evil shit Hornigold used to pull because mostly-dead Ed told us in 2x03, so, you know, good enough.

Ed has to kill himself and also his dad again, lol, we get it

Climactic stuff on the Revenge!

Hornigold catches up to them; there's some fighting or whatever; it leads us up to the cold open. But then it pushes through to: it was all a fuckery!!

(do not ASK me what kind of fuckery. they are hard to write, they are both deeply psychological and incredibly goofy. This is just an outline of a fake season LEAVE ME ALONE)

Ed was a distraction, acting how Hornigold expected him to act! It works: Stede kills Hornigold!

The OTP: The murder addresses how each wants to deal with violence in their respective genres:

Ed, when he did patricide on behalf of someone he loved (mum) got caught up the cycle of dreadful murder and trauma he wanted to escape. And now he sees that he can – he's not the doomed Romantic villain!

Stede, in doing step-patricide on behalf of someone he loves (Ed), commits in a real way to ruthlessly murdering bullies. He's a swashbuckler! He definitely likes it! Finally, he's found a way to express romantic love in a grounded* way. (*by OFMD standards.)

It's a deranged pirate sitcom way of turning their tentative courtship into a healthy adult relationship.

Ed + Izzy:

During the fuckery: Izzy is playing murdered-by-Ed, so he's "dead" on deck (vulnerable) amidst the chaos.

Ed throws himself over Izzy to save him from getting shot.

This doesn't erase all the shitty things Ed did! It's a big gesture instead of an everyday thing, just like Izzy was complaining about! But it's definitely an indicator that Ed would prefer not to drive Izzy to suicide and Ed does, even, ask if Izzy's okay afterwards, checking him over, before someone else points out that Ed got shot.

Lastly:

With final approval from Izzy – after a lengthy pause where Izzy looks at Edward panting and bleeding on the deck – the Crew decide to journey forth to find Super Good Medicine to save Ed.

THERE ARE HINTS THAT s3 MIGHT SHOW US:

Blackbeard's historic raid on Charleston (who is playing Blackbeard at that point? who knows!)

Ed and Izzy working on being weird-ass friends again, but without so much murder-suicide

Stede and Ed finally talking about how they want to spend their life together: what's between retirement and piracy?

This is all pretty okay because new s2 ends in a hopeful place where nobody FUCKING DIED jfc where everyone's grown a bit but, as always, still has room to grow more.

the end!

#ofmd s2 #some fic #imaginary s2

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vanilla-villainsstuff · 2 years

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HERE'S MY THOUGHTS ON ALL THE MAJOR SHIPS IN LMK

I dunno how controversial this is so...

Takes cover

I don't really like the idea of ppl shipping Nezha with anybody for two reasons:

In the original JTTW, he's mentally and physically a 12 year old who happens to be immortal. Meaning he looks and acts like a preteen. Now, in the show it seems that they made Nezha closer to MK's age. (who's probably 18-20 years old.) I don't really know why this decision was made, but I ain't touching that grey area with a ten foot pole.

Secondly, He... doesn't really have any romantic chemistry with anyone? Sure, he hasn't gotten much screentime but I can't really see Nezha being romantically involved with anyone, he just... doesn't seem to really care for it all that much. (Personally I hc him as aro-ace)

As for Dragonfruit, ehhh...I can see the appeal? It just seems kinda...repetitive as a ship? If Red Son and Mei were love interests, it would more or less be "Red Son not understanding social cues or social interactions or taking things too seriously and Mei helping him out." I don't think it's me being biased towards hetero ships cuz well, there are hetero ships I fucking love it's just, Dragonfruit just lacks that "umph!" factor, y'know? That deeper thing that makes it really stand out as a ship. It's a neat ship, don't get me wrong, I just don't really see why others really like it or make it their otp. Especially since Red Son and Mei seem to hate the idea of being together as seen in Revenge of the Spider Queen, it just seems like ppl are shipping them for no other reason than Red Son and Mei have funny/well written interactions in the show.

Now, why did I put Spicynoodles at the "should be canon" tier and not Dragonfruit? Well...

MK and Red Son are both bad at social interaction/social cues in completely opposite ways. MK is extremely impulsive, impatient, and hyperactive, which causes him to indirectly put him and/or his friends in danger to the point where multiple episodes are dedicated to explaining to MK to take it down a couple of notches. Meanwhile, Red Son is bad at social interaction/social cues because he's sheltered, overly serious, and hot tempered. If Red Son and MK were to be love interests, it could potentially balance things out. (MK showing Red how to let loose and appreciate others' company, and Red reeling MK in from doing something stupidly impulsive.)

Red Son and MK are also very inexperienced with romance, Red Son moreso. Red Son never seems to take romance into consideration, and again, was offended at the idea of being Mei's partner. I'd hazard a guess that Red never had a crush on or dated anyone before. Now, MK'S a different story...MK is explicitly shown to have interest in other men and see them as attractive, (See MK call DBK "Demon Daddy", calling Monkie King "handsome", and never expressing the same with women) so he's definitely had crushes on a few guys before, but it doesn't seem like he's ever dated anyone. So it would be super interesting to see both Red Son and MK figure out the whole dating thing as they go along

The reason why I believe it should be canon is because it could bring out a side of both the characters we don't really see and having both of them discover significant, new things about themselves. It could really flesh them out in a really interesting way and they'd have a very stand out dynamic

So... ShadowPeaches, amirite? But seriously, why do I think it should be canon? Well, I would explain in excruciating detail but this post is already hella fucking long and I'd rather go more in depth on ShadowPeaches in a post all about that ship exclusively.

(Also, to all the dumb brains out there spreading misinformation about JTTW, lemme put this misconception to bed now... MACAQUE AND WUKONG WERE NEVER BROTHERS IN JTTW! Buddha stated that they're vaguely a part of the same species, but not brothers. Wukong and Macaque have precisely zero deeper connection to each other in JTTW, Macaque's birth was never even detailed in the book and Wukong doesn't even have parents. I have researched this topic for weeks, I've read parts of the original JTTW, I have even talked with actual Chinese people on this stupid ass issue, and as far as I can tell, this is just a stupid fan theory being passed off as canon by non-Chinese ppl who haven't read or even properly researched the original JTTW. Shut the actual fuck up, I don't want to hear it.)

And finally, why is it gross to ship MK with Macaque/SWK? After all, didn't I myself say that MK is probably a legal adult, so shouldn't shipping them be fine? No, because it's not about the age thing (although it kinda is) it's about the massive, collosal, power imbalance that could manifest.

While MK is 18-20 years old, SWK and Macaque are very likely to be at least 1,000 years old. (SWK and Macaque were friends years before the events of JTTW, in the original JTTW, SWK gets put under a mountain for 500 years, and in the events of LMK, SWK went missing after sealing DBK under a mountain for another 500 years, so if we're assuming that LMK is following the same lore as JTTW, SWK and Macaque are at least 1,000 years old) Although it seems that Macaque and SWK are mentally and physically middle aged, which still isn't any better. Point being, a romantic relationship between MK and these two would be the equivalent of a 30 year old dating an 18 year old.

Secondly, SWK and Macaque are MK'S teachers and guardians, SWK moreso. A romantic relationship between them would be pretty fucked since SWK is affectively MK'S superior in everyway. MK wants to be SWK'S successor, wants to be close to him, wants to be a stronger person, and SWK having romantic feelings towards MK would just seem like...borderline grooming. Like I'm sorry, but that's why most college teachers, therapists, and doctors have a strict "no dating students/clients" rule since that could potentially lead to their students/clients to be taken advantage of because they're eager/vulnerable.

Now here's the thing: Why is shipping MK with the 1,000 year old SWK/Macaque wrong, but shipping him with the 420 (ha) year old Red Son is fine? Well, multiple reasons, the major ones being that Red looks mentally and physically to be around the same age as MK (both are still coming into their own, both aren't quite mature, plus Red Son is described as a "boy genius", so yeah, Red probably just ages a lot slower in comparison to mortals). Secondly because Red Son and MK are equals, Red isn't MK'S mentor or anything. But yeah to sum it up: even though MK X SWK/Macaque isn't technically p*dophila or whatever, it's still a massive power imbalance and comes off as gross. Stop it.

Andddd... that's all of my main thoughts on these ships! Hope you found this enjoyable, thanks for reading! :)

#monkie kid macaque #lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk #monkie kid mk #monkie kid tang #monkie kid red son #monkie kid sun wukong #monkie kid mei #lmk spicynoodles #monkie kid nezha #monkie kid pigsy #monkie kid sandy #shadowpeach #lmk qi xiaotian #lmk monkey king

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actualbampot · 3 months

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Ooo For the OTP asks because BAM CONTENT, how about some FP action in whichever AU or Canon you want?

17, 18, 23, and 37?

When I tried to answer to this the first time, my response was massive. Then tumblr deleted it and I sulked. Let's try again! Fallen Petals + Vampire AU 17. Who fell in love first? So, neither actually. And I probably wont ever write that particular arc. As their relationship goes through various phases, none of them are really attributed to love. Cinder grows particularly fond of Ruby when eventually they strike an agreeable balance between Ruby's livelihood and Cinder's needs, but for the most part Ruby spends it suffering Cinder, and berating herself over her attraction to her. 18. What song fits them perfectly? The name of the fic: Red Flags And Long Nights - She Wants Revenge 23. Who overthinks the most? For a myriad of reasons, Ruby. Cinder is volatile, unpredictable and being bound to her by their agreement is not very forgiving. Ruby's overthinking spirals very quickly into daily paranoia, with no way to know when or where Cinder will show up, no way to know if she's saving anybody by agreeing to be Cinder's sole source of food. Or if Cinder is even honouring their agreement to not harm anybody else. So, overthinking takes a hefty mental toll on Ruby.

37. What do they like the least about each other?

Where do I even START. Ruby: Ruby had never found arrogance attractive before, so she doesn't know what she hates more: The fact that Cinder shamelessly flaunts her power over people, or that the vexing web of control she weaves around everyone is what makes her so alluring. Most of all, she hates how absolutely justified Cinder's arrogant self-assurance is, and how helpless Cinder makes her feel because of it. She hates that Cinder can come and go as she pleases, and feed from Ruby as she needs it, and that at the end of the day, bled to lethargy, Cinder makes it near-impossible for her to hide the post-coital elation of being bitten. Cinder: When Ruby eventually does find leverage against Cinder, she hates how she initially dismissed just how self-righteous Ruby could be. That she's been hiding a backbone from Cinder that she didn't expect. It's both parts pleasantly surprising and incredibly condescending that a human would make any sort demand of her kind- of which Ruby leverages plenty. Thanks @scham-wcan!

#rwby #ruby rose #cinder fall #fallen petals #vampire au #cinderruby #asks #hud yer wheesht

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horizon-verizon · 1 year

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If Daemyra and Alys/Aemond are foils, how will they be presented to us on screen?

I'm bad at predictions, anon, so try not to be too disappointed with me. I also despise the notion of getting into Ryan Condal's -- and any major writer there -- mind.

To many in the audience, Daemyra is OTP and one of the biggest draws to the show (aside from actually hating Rhaenyra and loving Alicent for many Rhaenicent-shippers).

Since Aemond has been modified into:

a way calmer, less volatile version from the book, a person who seems victimized instead of the woman-hating victimizer

a guy who accidentally, rather than intentionally as in canon, kills his nephew while his younger nephew tries to run away from him -- Lucerys thinking Aemond will kill him because of years of hate AND Aemond literally just having told him to put out his own eye then chasing him for more than 10 minutes (let's imagine this happening, it would be a long-enough chase)...

Then I expect that the writers would present Aemond/Criston's capture of Harrenhal and taking Alys as his war prize as him "saving" her from destitution and/or him having inner conflict over how Lucerys' death went down. Others have already argued or suggested that HotD Aemond might regard Alys as something like his repentance for his actions against Lucerys (her being a Strong bastard). That the writers will pair these two either as Aemond trying to use her as his private penance or/and Alys victimizing him because she is the older one...ignoring the fact that Aemond killed all the Strong male issue and takes her as a war prize/sex slave.

You know what, I can believe that they will have Aemond lose control of his own emotions again, raze Harrenhal again (like Aegon I), see how he killed the Strongs "accidentally", and then take Alys as his publicized war prize so that he can make up for the fact that he accidentally killed her means to live (the Storng house). And then, the "whore" and "groomer"/"pedophile" Alys will encourage or begin to change their relationship into a real sexual one so she can use his authority for her own use and protection and seek revenge against those she lived with (the survivors of the House and their followers or servants) with such power. Because they probably will also present Alys living under the Strongs as being destitute as mistreated, as I already suggested.

Thus twisting Alys into some sort of gold digging tramp and repeating this current misogynist nonsense of women "trying to take men's money and only wanting them for their money" that you see bouncing around in Instagram, TikTok, etc., and real life people's own mouths. Instead of, say....a war prize trying to just survive?

I already wrote how Daemon and Aemond are foils HERE and what a Byronic hero is (what Daemon is modelled from) HERE. The show would have us think Aemond is the Byronic hero, or what it thinks a Byronic hero is.

HERE is a post I made that has pics of an NY Times interview with Condal. Here is what he says about Daemon:

We established right out of the gate, in the pilot, that Daemon is a fascinating guy, but he’s not Ned Stark. So I didn’t see it coming.

To me, Daemon is the antihero of this story. He’s a character with a real darkness to him, who’s dangerous and charming in equal parts. I knew people would be fascinated by him and latch onto him, but I figured they’d do it in the way they did with Jaime Lannister or Bronn or the Red Viper. I did not think they would oddly apply this sort of super-fandom to him and try to justify every single thing he’s done as being intrinsically heroic. It simply isn’t. It’s not the case. Nor will it be in the future.

[...]

I see Daemon as having heroic aspects to him, and I understand why people would. I mean, he’s incredibly charismatic, he’s handsome, he looks great in that wig, he rides a dragon, he has a cool sword. I totally get it. But if you’re looking for Han Solo, who’s always going to do the right thing in the end, you’re in the wrong franchise, folks.

Basically, Condal thinks/thought people justifies everything Daemon does as something that is inherently, morally good or innocuous. He believes people love Daemon because he is handsome, charming, a dragonriders, confident, etc. Basically he is a bad boy, Condal says, and people love a bad boy, but Condal's says people mistake him as a good person when he isn't.

But Condal also said some contradictory things about Daemon, seeming to flip-flop:

My post HERE of him talking about the choking scene.

LINK to post by @eschercaine

Which goes to show how much Condal knows about how fans of this series think and feel. Fans love Daemon yes for his self confidence, but many do not just love him for that. Many love that he is willing to do whatever it takes, especially violence, to protect both his family's lives and their dignities. He has been doing things like this even before Viserys became king. It is Viserys who troubles their relationship by causing Mysaria's miscarriage in canon.

And there is absolutely no indication that either Rhaenyra or her kids feared him while she was married to him in their years on Dragonstone together. But in HotD, his relationship with Rhaenyra apparently has physical abuse?! Daemon fucks Rhaenyra trying to get close to his brother?!

Keeping that in mind, as it is beyond obvious that Aemond and Daemon are thematic rivals (I already explain how in the linked post above), Condal makes Aemond the "better" person. Therefore, Aemond must and will come out looking like a victim and a "better person" next season. And apparently because these relationships hinge on the man's psychological state more than anything, their relationships will reflect the man's inner woes.

Daemyra is a relationship of wounded envy and little to no communication, a high chemistry non love posing as real love in HotD. AlysxAemond will be one of repressed angst, manipulation, and guilt, another non love but this time the war prize element will hammer in how boys can't be abusers of adults but Aemond is "just trying his best". Daemyra will spiral, falter, and disintegrate with Daemon's increasing violence corresponding to his growing frustrations with Rhaenyra's increasing paranoia. Feelings of betrayal will be presented from both characters -- Daemon wondering where her trust has gone after years of him proving it to her, and Rhaenyra just from feeling him grow more and more distant (hinted at with Daemon not being there when she lost Visenya).

#asoiaf asks to me #hotd comment #hotd predictions #rhaenyra and daemon #alys and aemond #alys rivers' characterization #alys rivers #aemond targaryen #daemon targayren #rhaenyra targaryen #hotd characterization #asoiaf #hotd

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insomniac-jay · 10 months

Text

Hyperspecific ship tags for my fave OC x canon ships

Momosuya (Tokyo Revengers) - OTP: You saved my life again

DukeZara (Batman) - OTP: Loving you is a losing game

Roysophia (Green Arrow/Titans) - OTP: Listen to your heart

Crimsonhood (Batman/Red Hood and the Outlaws) - OTP: They don't really care about us

AquaOrca (BNHA) - OTP: Beauty and the Beast

Icestarshipping (YGO 5Ds) - OTP: It's too cold for you

RockBelle (Tiger & Bunny) - OTP: Country loving

#jay's bnha ocs #jay's dc ocs #jay's ygo ocs #jay's tokrev ocs

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nitewrighter · 1 year

Note

Sojourn if you are still doing the "niche" ask, please

a song that reminds me of them: 15 Step by Radiohead

what they smell like: There's the obvious kind of metallic-exhaust smells of her prosthetics, but as far as her taste in soaps/perfumes goes, she like red fruit notes and warm floral mid-notes. Raspberry and jasmine and amber. Surprisingly feminine but not overwhelming. Like her prosthetics already have this kind of sharp smell to them, she likes smells that have a kind of softness to them when combined with your own body heat. Also it was a scent Liao used to wear a lot and she's nostalgic.

an otp: I like her with Liao a lot. "Engineer and Her Soldier" is the pairing name, I think? I still need to read her novel.

a notp: Don't really have one. I don't want her to get slapped with that "Strong Independent Black woman who don't need no man" trope, but also you can tell she's the kind of character where her love life takes a back seat to... pretty much everything else going on in her life. Actually I just found an interaction with Mercy where Mercy asks "How's that man you were telling me about?" and Sojourn says, "Angela I'm not discussing my love life on a mission." so that's interesting!

favorite platonic/familial relationships: I like how she intimidates Winston and she knows she intimidates Winston but she has a fun sense of humor about it. I'd be really interested in seeing her interact with Echo more!

a headcanon that is popular in the fandom but that i disagree with: Again, this fandom is terrible at remembering black characters exist despite begging for Sojourn for years. I do like Canadians slapping cute little Canadian cultural bits on her. I just think it's funny when they say "Sojourn drinks Tim Hortons."

the position they sleep in: Pretty average side-sleeper, but she takes her damn legs off to sleep. There's just... a lot of hardware and hydraulics that she doesn't want to bother with when she's going to sleep. She keeps a pair of leg blade prosthetics next to the bed in case she needs to run right out of bed, but she'll also not give a fuck and crawl to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

a crossover au i’d love to see them in: I honestly have to incorporate her more into my fics, because she's been a vital addition to my pre-fall stuff and she deserves to be in more of my recallwatch fics. I wish she was more on-theme with Junkenstein's revenge... the gumshoe skin is so out of place...

my favorite outfit they’ve ever worn: Sojourn I am so sorry that Blizzard is not even remotely trying with your skins. But that being said I love the Aliens Vasquez vibes on her commando skin.

#overwatch #sojourn overwatch #vivian chase

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kit-middleton · 9 months

Text

Teen Wolf 1st Watch - 1.12 to 2.04 (?)

I’m still worried about the adult men of Teen Wolf, to be honest. Except you, Sheriff, you’re fine sweetie. And Coach. Coach might be my favourite character in the entire show. His reaction to the chains unfurling from Stiles’ locker? Perfection!

I love the hot dads (and uncles) of Teen Wolf, they are ridiculously hot, but if this was real life, their behaviour would be really questionnable.

I need all of you to stay at least one arm’s length away from any and all teenagers who are not your children, all right?

Breakdown of things that delighted and/or worried me in this block of episodes.

Peter

To my surprise — but absolutely no one else’s — I loved Peter. I fully expected to adore him later (spoiler alert!), but his first appearance wasn’t promising. Ugh, who does that vain, selfish guy think he is?

I had the same reaction to Andrew Scott’s Moriarty, and within five minutes I was in love.

So: yeah, terrifying and creepy. But he’s so amusing and weird (and Ian Bohen is just leaning into it so gleefully) that I love him. Can’t wait for him to come back.

On the “inappropriate with teenagers” list:

Complimenting Allison’s skin like he wants to wear it is both hilarious and much too creepy. Good job trying to be charming Peter!

Biting Lydia then lying on top of her with your face less than a foot away from Stiles? Uncomfortable.

Offering to bite Stiles while holding up his wrist like a Victorian vampire? Yeah, Stiles/Peter is in my top-3 OTP.

Chris

I will never stop loving JR Bourne. The voice, the eyes, the smile… Yeah, big crush. (And he is doing a marvellous Moriarty-level crazy job on Mayans, MC if that’s your kind of thing. Weirdly obsessed with wolves again over there too.)

I’m a bit confused by one sequence in 2.01, though: the grey-scaled scene where he breaks a car window (it better not have been Melissa’s car, Chris), drags Scott (a werewolf, so super strength?) out through the broken window, and threatens to kill him. Was that a flashback or a dream? I find it hard to believe it really happened. And then idiots Scott and Allison kept seeing each other in secret. (I believe it from Scott, but I thought Allison was smarter than that.)

On the “inappropriate with teenagers” list:

Shoving Stiles against a wall and getting much too close to his face in 1.12.

Shoving Scott against the fridge to threaten him the second time he has dinner at his house, risking being overheard by Colonel Tigh in season 2. (Does that make Chris a Cylon?)

And this one is not being inappropriate with teenagers, but still really irresponsible:

Using the Hale house as a training site and base of operations for the hunters. He knows Derek is still in town, right?

Leaving Allison (his darling daughter) tied up in the abandoned Hale house with a single young hunter. At night. So much could have gone wrong. How much do you trust that young man? How much do you trust Derek not to come back and get revenge? We know Derek better than that, but does Chris?

I’m not even mentioning the many times he’s been face-to-face with Jackson: at the end of season one, looking down at Jackson on his knees in the woods with that smirk; and putting his arm around Jackson’s shoulder to escort him out of the Hale house (did I mention THE HALE HOUSE?) in season 2.

And God bless the directors or camera operators who linger on his ass at every opportunity. Thank you for your service.

Derek

Oh my God, Derek. Where do I start?

Maybe with the super weird way Peter’s death was filmed? Derek straddles him to finish him off, fine. But then he stands, one foot on either side of the corpse while he looks over his shoulder at the others and flashes his red eyes? Why was that blocking so weird?

Derek gets a brand new personality in season 2. Does the Alpha power come with the personality of the person who had it before you? Because Derek with about 10-15% of Peter’s swagger is fun, but then it goes up to maybe 30% and that’s too much. The only times he felt like season 1 Derek was in his scenes with Stiles.

On the “inappropriate with teenagers” list:

Isaac. I wouldn’t say “inappropriate” so much as needlessly callous. Derek knows Isaac’s father abused him, but he roars in his face and completely terrifies him, then in a later episode, “trains” him by hitting him over and over again. Not cool, dude.

Erica. I suppose she is about 16, like Stiles and Scott, right? So what the fuck is adult Derek doing when talking to her in the morgue, stroking her calves and ankles, then grabbing her ankles and pulling her towards him, her legs either side of his hips? With the statutory rape in his past, shouldn’t he be trying not to use the seductive method to get teenagers on his side? Ugh. And because both actors are so clearly adults, the scene read as really hot, which made it extra disturbing. Thanks, I hate it.

Erica again. She jumps him and kisses him, hoping to distract. Fine, not his fault. But he kisses back for a really long time before he pushes her off. And when he does push her off, it is much too violent. I like Derek, and I get why he’s doing this, but I really, really don’t like it.

Erica, again (again). Derek looks like the douchebag twenty-something “dating” the 16-year-old when he picks Erica up at school. It’s on purpose to rile up Scott, but still. Ewww, Derek.

(Were the Stiles/Derek shippers already very active after season 1? Because this seems almost like overcompensating from the writers. I’m old enough to remember Smallville and the way Michael Rosenbaum was way too flirty with the 16-year-old boy in season 1 and in season 2 they had Lex pretty much marry 2 women. This feels like that.)

Other random stuff:

Lydia is still my favourite of the kids, equal or a little bit ahead of Stiles.

Scott really needs to prioritize survival over Allison. Really. Stop thinking with your dick, man.

Jackson. Oh my god, Jackson. Calm down. Go to therapy. I don’t know, come out of the closet? You need help buddy, you are insufferable.

Yay, ghost Peter! Now if he could speak a bit that would be great.

Victoria is terrifying. It’s kind of fun to discover that her husband is a big marshmallow while she is ice-cold flint. (Silver and Flint, ha!)

Who is creepy photographer guy? And why does he look about 35 when he’s meant to be a high school student?

#teen wolf #teen wolf first watch #teen wolf season 1 #teen wolf season 2 #daddies of teen wolf #Chris argent #Peter hale #Derek hale #stop touching the children please #be better men of teen wolf #shipping #sterek #god I hate ship names #Derek/stiles #Peter/stiles #steter #my favourite ship is Chris/Peter/stiles #it probably has a name but I don't want to know it

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forzasedici · 9 months

Note

i love it that you reblogged the “get to know the blogger” post bc i saw you reblog a lot of “le belle et la bete” gifs and was curious about your general taste/favourite films 👁️👁️

this is going to be so long i'm sorry but i just love talking about it so let's start!

i'm going to highlight some of the movies from my favourites list on letterboxd aka the movies that butter my bun:

— Skyfall (2012) and 1917 (2019) both directed by Sam Mendes are honestly great movies with Skyfall for me being the best Bond movie and 1917 as one of the best war movies. What made 1917 one of my favourites was the watching it at cinema experience plus the reveal in the end is just *chef's kiss*

— Tarantino movies. Like that's it. I know a lot of ppl don't like him but for me he's one of the best writers and sure has his problems but you cannot deny his work is great. Inglorious Basterds for me take the cake as his best movie with Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill: Part I being up there as well. One of his underrated movies is definitely Jackie Brown which I've loved.

— Period dramas. Another one of my fave genres. Emma. (2020) being one of my favourite movies. Emma (2009) is also a great adaptation albeit it is a series. Pride and Prejudice (2005) and (1995) are great as well. Little Women has recently grown on me way more and remains my favourite Greta Gerwig movie. Another underrated movie for me is Ophelia which as the title says focuses more on Ophelia from the play Hamlet. It's really well done and I've enjoyed watching it.

— This one is also a period drama but it is a bollywood movie so I wanted to highlight it. Jodhaa Akbar is a MUST watch such a good movie it's insane like I'm sorry you have a sword fight sequence between two lovers and you have won me over.

— Let's get franchises out of the way. Obviously Marvel movies are some of my favourites with Avengers: Infinity War, Captain America: The Winter Soldier and Thor: Ragnarok which are in my top 3. Both Black Panther movies and Spider-man: No Way Home are taking honourable mentions. For their series my favourite has been Moon Knight. (Sony gets their cookies for Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse and obviously Venom because come on now eddie and venom are otp y'all don't get it like i do)

— Next big franchise is Star Wars. Original trilogy: Empire Strikes Back. Prequel trilogy: Revenge of the Sith (I'm an Anakin girlie unfortunately) and Sequel trilogy: The Last Jedi (Rian Johnson supremacy). Series: Obi-wan Kenobi (i cried). Honourable mention to Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (i also cried).

— Since I mentioned Rian Johnson let's expand on that because the man just gets movies and everyone should watch Looper and Knives Out!!

— Denis Villeneuve. MY MAN!!!! Arrival and Dune *chef's kiss* if you can bear longer movies also Blade Runner 2049 but it isn't one of my favorites exactly because it was long and boring. And since probably someone will say the same for Dune at least Dune has you looking at Oscar Isaac and Timothee Chalamet sure they look miserable but that's when men look the best.

— Spy movies? like idk how to call this but let me list them all. Anna (2019) they succeeded where The Red Sparrow failed like if you're looking for anything similar to Black Widow Anna is the one I would recommend a thousand times. The Nice Guys and The Man From U.N.C.L.E. great comedies I just love them. It's not really a spy but assassin I guess but John Wick franchise is the shit and the best movie is obviously John Wick 2.

— Another director that has me is unfortunately Christopher Nolan. Can I get more basic than that? I do admit his faults and that's sound mixing is fucking awful, I don't understand his movies while I am watching them most of the time and this man cannot write a female character for the life of him BUT 🎶 shapes and colours 🎶. His ideas are what draw me in and it's just visual masterpieces doesn't matter if I can't hear the dialogue if it looks good am I right?

— Smashing musicals and animation together because this is already becoming too long. Singin' In The Rain and The Sound of Music are a MUST watch and also I'm a Phantom of the Opera girlie so if you're going to watch anything watch the 25th anniversary version. I am also unfortunately a Hamilton girlie and the damage to my life caused by that damn musical is irreparable. For animation musical Hercules, The Emperor's New Groove, Anastasia, The Lion King and Tangled and purely animation Howl's Moving Castle, Lilo and Stitch, The Incredibles and Inside Out.

— Now it's time for a quick fire: Ford v Ferrari and Rush are two best movies for my motorsport girlies, Gone Girl and The Hunger Games: Catching Fire for my book girlies, Death at a Funeral and Hot Fuzz for the british comedy girlies, i'm also unfortunately a Titanic girlie probably the movie i've watched most in my life, THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS!!! A. MUST. WATCH. Monty Python movies are great if you ignore some of the outdated jokes. Jackie is one of my favorites just because it's one of Natalie's Portman's best performances and that's also including Black Swan but both movies are also visually stunning.

— The Death of Stalin is one of the best comedies as well. Ready Player One is one of my weirder favourites since many ppl see it as an average movie but i'd recommend it to anyone (literally can't believe it's my favourite Spielberg movie 😭😭). Also add to the video game genre Tron: Legacy because I will also recommend that movie to anyone. The Grand Budapest Hotel is also a must watch like if anyone made the world go through a pink paint shortage before Barbie did then it's this movie and finally The Batman (2022). Let's end on a battinson note just because.

— Crazy to think I haven't even mentioned all of my favourites but I guess this is kinda the jist of it all. Basically my taste is anything as long as I like it I guess jsbsjsbsjs. (I forgot to mention the horror genre but that's just because I don't really have a favourite movie like if I had to say anything it would be The Conjuring movies.)

— As for Le Belle Et La Bête it's one of my new favourites and honestly got me into a french cinema mood so I'll probably find more favourites there. One of my goals has always been to watch more foreign movies but not many have entered my favourites club unfortunately. Also fuck disney live-action remakes (except you cinderella (2015)).

get to know the blogger

#.ask #anonymous #i'm so sorry for how long this is i just get excited talking about this smsbsmnsns #so if you'd like to talk about this more my DMs are always open

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reds-self-ships · 9 months

Text

WELCOME TO MY SELF SHIPPING BLOG! 👋

My name is Red, my pronouns are he/him, and I'm gay as fuck for several fictional men who are also gay for each other. It's fun!

A full list of all my f/os (romantic and platonic) is available on my Carrd - see the link below. Romantic self ship tags are available below the read more.

I'm fine with sharing, too, btw.

⛔ DO NOT INTERACT:

You're LGBTQ+phobic (this includes exclusionaries, TE//RFs and "gen//der crit//ical" people, too);

You're a pro//shipper (as well as anti-antis, comship, etc.);

You're a MAP/PEAR/etc.;

You're anti-self shipping, or;

You're otherwise here to cause drama or discourse.

I operate on a strict no-abuse policy. You send anything abusive, you're blocked on-sight. End of.

💖Romantic F/Os and their tags

You can follow or block at your leisure - Listed in order they were F/O'd in.

Ryunosuke Naruhodo - Dai Gyakuten Saiban/The Great Ace Attorney (Husband - M. May 12th 2021) - OTP: Red Dragon

Judge Q - The God of High School (Boyfriend/Partner) - OTP: Red Joker

Kazuma Asogi - Dai Gyakuten Saiban/The Great Ace Attorney (Boyfriend/Partner) - OTP: Red Headband

Chuya Nakahara - Bungo Stray Dogs (Boyfriend/Partner) - OTP: Red Wine

Ranpo Edogawa - Bungo Stray Dogs (Boyfriend/Partner) - OTP: Red Detective

Zimelu - No Straight Roads (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Robot

Sebastian Moran - Moriarty the Patriot (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Rifle

Kurima Raizou - Revenger (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Revenger

Von Herder - Moriarty The Patriot (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Gun Freak

Nikolai Gogol - Bungo Stray Dogs (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Overcoat

Mateo Thiago - Cyberpunk 2077 (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Cocktail

David Jones - Criminal Case (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red and Blue

Dick Grayson/Nightwing - DC Comics (boyfriend/partner) - OTP: Red Protector

#otp: red dragon #otp: red joker #otp: red headband #otp: red wine #otp: red detective #otp: red rifle #otp: red revenger #otp: red gun freak #otp: red overcoat #otp: red cocktail #otp: red and blue #otp: red protector #pinned post

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typingtess · 2 years

Video

youtube

NCIS: Los Angeles Season 13 Rewatch: “Down the Rabbit Hole”

The basics: Katya kidnaps Callen and the team is on the case.

Written and directed by Frank Military. Military wrote "Little Angels", "Deliverance", "Lockup", "The Job", "Greed", "Betrayal", "Crimeleon", "Vengeance", "Out of the Past" Part One, "Rude Awakenings" Part Two, season four’s finale "Descent", season five’s premiere "Ascension", "Allegiance", "Spoils of War" (directed by Military), "Black Budget", "SEAL Hunter", "Rage" (directed by Military), "Unspoken", "Unlocked Mind", "Revenge Deferred", "The Seventh Child" (directed by Military), "Crazy Train", "Uncaged" (directed by Military), "The Silo", "Monster", "Line in the Sand" (directed by Military), season ten opener "To Live and Die in Mexico" (directed by Military), "The Patton Project", "Better Angels", "False Flag" (the season 10 finale), "A Bloody Brilliant Plan", "Code of Conduct" (season 11 finale, directed by Military) and "Raising the Dead", "Through the Looking Glass" and "Indentured". Military directed one episode he did not write, season 11’s holiday episode "Answers". He also appeared as Donald Kessler in "Raising the Dead" and several other episodes in photos.

Guest stars of note: Bar Paly as Anastasia "Anna" Kolcheck and Beckett Gunderson as Young Callen are both back from "Genesis" in April. Elizabeth Bogush is back from “Subject 17” as Joelle Taylor. Sasha Clements as Katya Miranova, Karolina Szymczak as Vavara/Female Fire Captain, Andrei Dolezal as Young Pembrook and Jamil Akim O’Quinn as Detective Michael McNeil.

Our heroes: Rid themselves of Katya with some Joelle help.

What important things did we learn about:

Callen: Kidnapped. Sam: Greatest partner in the world. Kensi: Working with Rountree. Deeks: In Guatemala. Fatima: Using Kaleidoscope the whole episode. Rountree: Working with Kensi. Kilbride: Figures out the best course of action is to start in the past.

What not so important things did we learn about:

Callen: Loves Anna. Sam: Loves Callen. Kensi: Not deep faked. Deeks: Absent. Fatima: In the office the entire episode. Rountree: Always checking for bombs now. Kilbride: Not particularly ranty today.

Where in the world is Henrietta Lange? Gets a mention from Katya.

Who's down with OTP: In the episode, nothing. In the short deleted scene, Kensi is worried about Deeks being gone.

Who's down with BrOTP: Callen code phrase to Sam is “greatest partner in the world” while Sam’s is “I love you”. You don’t get much more BrOTP than that.

Fashion review: Callen is wearing a peacock blue button-down shirt. Sam is wearing a brick red long-sleeve tee. Kensi is back in the white and blue striped long-sleeve tee (a lot of use for that top at the end of this season). Fatima is wearing a green-grey sweater over a darker green turtleneck. Rountree is wearing a pink-tee shirt under a blue-green jacket. A dark blue three-piece suit with a pale blue shirt and blue tie.

Music: None.

Any notable cut scene: In the firing range, Kensi and Rountree are set up and shooting. When Kensi finishes her practice session, Rountree asks about Deeks coming come the next day. Kensi says “Can’t wait,” but sounds sad. Rountree asks if Kensi is OK. Kensi says sure, her husband is down in Guatemala with no badge, authority or gun. Rountree thought Deeks was down there gathering paperwork. He is but there was more than just the paperwork.

Rosa’s father didn’t abandon the family, he was murdered by MS-13. He was a journalist who wrote about the gangs and was killed for it. That helps Rosa’s asylum request/Kensi and Deeks’s adoption plans since it proves Rosa was fleeing to the US for her own safety. All true, Kensi tells Rountree but Deeks has to gather witness statements, police reports. Rountree reassures Kensi that Deeks will be home tomorrow.

Fatima enters the firing range with a situation – Katya made contact. She is sending them to meet with Sam.

Quote: "Sam Hanna, greatest partner in the world.”

Anything else: An impatient Callen is sitting in traffic. There are accidents in both directions on the highway. Fatima calls to set up a shared call with Sam. Callen greets Sam with a compliment – “Sam Hanna, greatest partner in the world.” Sam replies that “someone took a happy pill.” Everyone laughs as Fatima tells both men that Marshall Davis is back and the weapons deal planned for next month is going down today. Davis was arriving in LA today and wanted to meet with a Stewart Grimes at 9:30AM in Davis’s office to work out the details. NCIS has been staking out Davis’s office for a month – they need to be ready to roll.

Pulling out of traffic and onto a side street, Callen parks his car and opens the trunk. In his go-bag are several phones. When Sam answers, Callen repeats the “Sam Hanna, greatest partner in the world” statement. Sam tells Callen he loves him. The conversation was code. Checking with Sam, Callen learns that he wasn’t on the phone minutes ago. Sam is surprised the deep fake call was with two people. “That’s got to be Katya.” Whatever Katya has planned, it is starting now. Callen half-jokes that Sam saying I love you saved him. Sam is going to talk to Fatima about putting their comms on a closed, encrypted loop (shouldn’t they be that way already?).

“It gets worse,” Callen tells Sam. Katya used their case against Marshall Davis to lure Callen in. That has Sam worried – Katya is in their casefiles. Since this case has been going on for months, Katya has been staking them out for a while. Thinking that going to where Katya tried to lure Callen with a team could end their Katya issues. Callen and Sam set up a location near Davis’s office to meet.

As Callen drives to the location, an ambulance and a LA Fire Department SUV are going the wrong way down Callen’s one-way street. Callen tries back out of the street but a firetruck is right behind him. Out of his car and waving his badge, Callen asks one of the firefighters to make a little room so he can get through the street. The firefighter has a weapon in her hand. She hits Callen with some sort of tranquilizer dart. A firefighter behind Callen has a taser. Callen is down for the count. Just to make sure, the dart shooting firefighter punches Callen in the face. The ambulance opens up and a gurney comes out.

As Sam pulls up in the location where he and Callen were supposed to meet, he pulls out his phone and calls Callen. Right to voicemail. Tapping his comms, Sam is connected to Fatima, who tells him that Kensi and Rountree are five minutes out. Sam tells Fatima that Callen isn’t where they were supposed to meet and he was much closer when they spoke. Fatima looks at her tablet – Callen’s comm went offline five minutes ago.

Four women carry Callen into yet another shipping container. Callen is strapped into a chair. The walls are covered with soundproofing material. As the doors are locked, Callen starts coming. There is a big screen TV and Callen is on the TV. He knows it is Katya. Screen-Callen talks about the old TV show This Is Your Life. Katya considers what’s happening now as This is the End of Your Life.

When Kensi and Rountree arrive, Sam updates them. Fatima has video of Callen eight blocks from the meet site, leaving his car and going to the stakeout.

Back in the shipping crate, Screen-Callen is yammering on about becoming obsessed moving on to it being almost sexual. Real Callen wants to know how Katya knew about their case. There is no case – Katya set it all up and the team came buzzing “like good little bees to service your queen.” As the team staked out the office, Katya was able to put trackers on everyone’s cars, listening to their conversations, getting details of everyone’s lives. Katya knows that Callen has been meeting with “that one-legged bitch” – Joelle.

Turning her attention to Anna, Katya asks Callen if he thinks it is strange that the two of them love the same woman. “We” had sex with the same woman. Callen wants to know who is “we” since all he sees is someone like a 14-year old wannabe hacker playing online practical jokes while hiding in their bedroom. Pulling off whatever made her look like Callen, the real Katya is on the screen with a lot of pricey computer equipment behind her. She’s not hiding from Callen.

Since the moment he took Anna from her, all Katya wanted to do was meet Callen, Again, Katya feels he took the most important thing in the world to her. Callen disagrees – he knows what the most important thing in the world is to Katya. Katya insists it was Anna, her last chance at happiness. Thinking Katya can’t live with happiness, all she has is hate and revenge. And they share that because both want to see Howard Pembrook dead.

Calling into Ops, Kensi wants Fatima to contact Anna, see if Callen has spoken to her. Fatima is reviewing security cameras in the area and traffic cams. The Admiral joins Fatima in Ops. Looking at the blocks around the fake office for Marshall Davis, Fatima can’t a trace of Callen in the neighborhood. Sam asks her to check out the office there were using for stakeouts – there was a camera there. Two clicks and Fatima see the power has been cut to the office. Saying that something is “profoundly wrong”, the Admiral is sending in the REACT Team to the office. While the team drives to the office, the Admiral asks about Deeks, who is in Guatemala working on the adoption paperwork. The Admiral isn’t pleased but he’s not angry either.

Not long after Sam, Kensi and Deeks arrive at the office building, the REACT Team shows up. Setting an outside perimeter around the office, Sam, Kensi, Rountree and the REACT Team go into the office building to their stakeout location. In the office, the NCIS chairs, computers and telescopes are there. The office for Marshall Davis, however, now sits empty. One of the REACT Team members gets the power back to the office.

With the power returning, Fatima is able to download what was last on the security video. Putting it up on the computer screen in the office, there is soundless video of Callen walking into the office followed by five women wearing ski masks. The women circle Callen as fourth of them start beating the living hell out of him. The fifth woman looks at the camera and takes off her ski mask – it is Katya.

Knowing that nobody but NCIS is in the office, Sam wants to check the security cameras in and around the building to see how Callen was brought in and taken out. Of course the cameras outside were disabled. Sam saw a new photo of Katya that Callen got from Joelle. The Admiral will have Joelle picked up and brought in. As Kensi and Rountree search every inch of the office for a clue, Sam is on his way to the boatshed.

In the shipping crate, Katya tells Callen that Pembrook has been dead for 25-years. Callen disagrees, even says he spoke to him. Katya wants a name but Callen won’t share unless they meet face-to-face. Katya leaves the fake female firefighter to watch Callen. When Callen asks who his new babysitter is, she replies “I’m the one who made your face not so pretty.” Katya enters in the shipping crate with a warning, Callen is playing with fire if he lies about Pembrook. And by playing with fire, she means burning Callen to death if this is a trick. Callen makes a joke and gets punched twice in the face. Saying that they were trained by the same person, Callen knows whatever Katya is feeling, he’s already felt.

When Katya moves in close to Callen, it causes a flashback. Pembrook is hammering Callen’s fingers, telling him not to cry. Pembrook tells Callen not to feel because feelings cause pain. She wants to know what he is thinking now. Callen recognizes she’s wearing Pembrook’s cologne – Shulton Pierre Cardin. Callen asks where she found it. Admitting it took a while, she wears it every day now, she got so use to it so she doesn’t smell it anymore. Callen says “feeling cause pain.”

In interrogation, Sam can’t believe Joelle doesn’t know anything about Katya. Joelle says she’s telling the truth but an arriving Kilbride tells her she’s not. Her ex-colleagues at the CIA have been feeding Joelle info on Katya. Saying that the search for Katya was killing her, the CIA had Joelle speak to “some really good people.” Joelle is fighting very hard to put all this behind her.

On comms, Fatima interrupts. She has something to show Sam and the Admiral. In the main section of the boatshed, Fatima found a van with no windows. It was stolen two days ago. There is a BOLO with LAPD to find the van and Kaleidoscope is looking too. Fatima has some bad news – Anna isn’t answering NCIS’s calls. Fatima got Arkady to call – they have a secret code too – and Anna is not answering to that.

Alone, the Admiral tells Sam he’s going to kick Joelle free – see where she goes and what she does. Sam is going to put a tracker on Joelle’s car. As Sam is about to leave, the Admiral mentions Sam losing Michelle in a situation like this. “We’re going to get your partner back,” the Admiral says. “Yes, of course,” Sam says without his usual enthusiasm.

In the shipping container, Callen is trying to make a deal. Both he and Katya could find Pembrook together. Katya knows he’s working an angle. He’d never work with her, never let her walk away. “The things I’ve done can’t be excused.” Callen says if he finds Pembrook, Katya knows what he’ll do, which means he will have blood on his hands. They will put the gun in Pembrook’s mouth and pull the trigger together. Callen won’t only let her walk away, he’ll help her start over. That way, they both will be fixed. Katya says she can’t be fixed. She still wants to hurt Callen for taking Anna away from her. She’ll find Pembrook. Katya leaves.

Arriving where Fatima found the van, Sam sees Kensi picking the lock while Rountree checks for explosives. No explosives so Kensi opens the door. A camera is looking that the three of them while deep fake Callen and Sam are on the TV screen behind the camera set-up. Fake Callen and Sam are looking for Deeks and Fatima, who fake Callen thinks is sexy. Real Sam asks Fatima to check for a video signal going to van. Fake Callen tells her not to bother, the team just fell down the rabbit hole and there is no signal there.

In Ops, Fatima can’t trace the signal. They can’t trust anything going forward. A beep from Fatima’s tablet has Joelle stopping at a different office location. Sam is on his way while Kensi and Rountree check out the van to see what they can find.

With a change in the screen in the shipping container, Callen sees a badly beaten Anna strapped to a chair. He calls to her but she can’t hear him. Instead, Katya is talking about how much she loves Anna. Beaten and handcuffed, Anna is not feeling the love. While Anna says they were only together a short time while they were in prison, Katya announces it was the happiest time in her life. She thinks Anna keeps going on-and-off again with Callen because she is still in love with Katya. Callen can see Anna playing her. Anna admits she has a hard time with her bisexuality but she loved their time together. Katya asks if Anna still loves her. Anna admits still thinking of her.

Walking into the office building, Sam learns from Fatima that Joelle is on the fourth floor. Fatima has video of Joelle entering the office. Sam knocks, saying he’s coming in one way or another. An annoyed Joelle answers, asking how he found her. She pulled the two trackers off her car. Sam put four on the car. Looking around the office, Sam asks how long has she and Callen had this “side hustle”. It is two months. Sam wants to know why Joelle is keeping secrets. He knows Callen is in a seriously bad place. Joelle tells him they were tracking Katya and Pembrook. Since the law can “get in the way of a really good time”, they were working without NCIS.

Following credit cards, they found Katya renting vehicles, from the vehicles, they were able to trace her movements with traffic cameras. Katya swaps out vehicles every day or two. Looking at the businesses where Katya was parking, Joelle found a shipping container rental property. Since both Joelle and Anna were held in a container, Cargo Blue Inc. is a place to start.

When Rountree comes up with nothing in the van, Kensi says she didn’t expect them anything. Katya is too smart and too well trained to leave anything behind. Since everything they found was a deep fake, Rountree realizes the beating of Callen was likely as fake as this van being used in Katya’s plan. They are moving forward on Katya’s planted clues. The Admiral agrees, they should go back in time to trace what Katya did, not wait for her to send them on another wild goose chase. They have to find something they know it is real. If they can find something from a camera they know is really, the team will use that as a starting point.

On the screen, Anna is told Callen is in other shipping container. Katya turns on Callen’s camera but not the audio – Katya doesn’t want Anna to hear him. Anna thinks it is a deep fake but Katya shows her a photo of Callen’s chest with the bullet holes. If Anna will leave the country with Katya, Katya will tell NCIS where to find Callen. Asking for a month, alone together, Anna could leave Katya after that if she’s unhappy. Katya wants to know if it is real. Anna agrees to go. The two kiss.

Knowing that Anna would say anything to save Callen, Katya thought she’d feel better if she heard Anna say she’d leave. Instead, Katya feels like a prostitute. Anna says Katya is wrong but Katya asks for a gun. With Callen yelling “don’t shoot her,” Katya does just that. Covered in Anna’s blood, Katya tells the camera that shooting Anna felt real and good.

After tracking Callen from the time he got the deep fake call, Fatima found the fire truck/ambulance blocking Callen in but nothing after that. A call to the 9-1-1 operators said there were not fires in that area. The Admiral wants Kensi and Rountree to check out the area. “Someone must’ve seen what happened to Callen.”

Using security cameras, Joelle has Katya coming out of the Cargo Blue offices wearing a wig. Cargo Blue’s offices are half-way between the Port of Long Beach and the Port of Los Angeles. With the shipping issues, there are tens-of-thousands of shipping containers just sitting around in the ports. Good place to hide Callen, terrible place to look for him – he’s a needle in a haystack.

At her workstation in Ops, Fatima gets a call from Anna. Worried that it is a deep fake, Fatima is going to use their codes. When Fatima says it is a beautiful day in the neighborhood, Anna answers that Mr. Rogers was the man. It was the code. Anna was on a run in Topanga. The Admiral can’t quite abide by a three-and-a-half hour run but Anna says she is training for a marathon. Anna is brought up to speed and asks if Callen is alive. The Admiral doesn’t know. She’s coming into the office.

At the place where Callen was grabbed, witnesses confirm to Kensi and Rountree that Callen collapsed and was put into an ambulance. They thought the fire truck and ambulance was there for Callen as part of medical emergency. Fatima is able to track the movements of the ambulances while Joelle gets the code numbers for the shipping containers. Fatima watches the ambulance go into the alley and a white van exit the other side. Rountree is worried they switched vehicles again. Joelle sees a white van outside of the Port of Long Beach with the same plates. Sam realizes they either got very lucky or Katya planned this. The Admiral wants to follow up this lead with the whole team and the REACT guys. While Sam leaves, Joelle keeps the video running and sees a smallish sedan pick up the people from the van. Blowing up the license plate on her computer screen, Joelle can track it.

When Anna arrives at the Port of Long Beach, Kensi promises her they will find Callen. Sam is right behind Anna. Joelle heard from the Port Authority with the location of one of the shipping crates. Sam leads the way. The Port Authority police are waiting for Sam, Kensi and Rountree outside of the shipping container. Anna is there too. Rountree checks for bombs while Kensi picks the lock. Though Kensi is worried they are doing Katya’s bidding by opening the shipping container, Sam doesn’t think they have any choice.

Opening the container, Callen is on a big screen with Katya. Callen is happy to see Anna alive. Katya thinks it is going to be so much fun to make everyone watch. Sam tries to talk to Katya but is ordered to shut up. Callen gets punched in the face for no real reason. With a bucket between Callen’s legs, Katya picks up a canister with potassium cyanide pellets. When she puts them in the bucket, they’ll dissolve and kill Callen with cyanide gas. Dropping the pellets into the bucket, Katya leaves while Callen starts to choke to death on the poison gas.

Sam does not believe a minute of it. Anna does. Pulling Anna away from the screen, Sam tells her not to believe it. Katya wants Anna and to do that, she has to keep Callen alive. In his shipping container, Callen is very much alive and is encouraging Anna to believe Sam. Sam tells Rountree to kill the video feed. Rountree does.

When Katya arrives at the shipping container, Callen tells her the team didn’t believe her cyanide act. Katya thinks they looked worried. Promising to take everything from Callen, she brings a few of her flunkies with big cases into the container. Since the Pembrook training made them feel nothing, she knows they both really want to die. But to cause Callen real pain, his real family is not the sister he barely sees but Sam, Hetty, Kensi and Deeks who all mean everything to him. Seeing them killed in an explosion trying to save him is the new plan. Thinking he’s dying they’ll rush into the container which Katya’s flunkies are wiring it to blow up. With a camera outside of the crate, Callen can watch the team die.

From Ops, Fatima found footage of the van stopping off at a private shipping container company before it was parked outside the port. Callen is likely there. Fatima sends the address and the team is on their way. At the private facility with the REACT Team, they are looking for the container numbers Joelle sent them.

In a car with the chief flunky, Katya admits that killing Callen gives her as much pleasure as drinking a glass of water though she honestly thought it would make her feel better. Callen is one of the few people who knew how dead she feels inside. The flunky wants Katya to go – it’s all over. Katya is there to hear the final explosion.

Running through the huge crates, Anna found one. The team is on their way but Anna is in the back of the facility. Anna is trying to open it but Callen is screaming for her not to open it. Thinking he’s inside, Anna tries to shoot the lock off the door. Callen yells for her to stop shooting. She fires her gun again.

Someone is walking with a gun. Katya tells the flunky she thought the bomb would have gone off by now. Katya wants to go back in but the flunky is worried about the NCIS agents all over the facility. Katya gasps. Joelle is in front of the car. She executes the flunky. Just before being killed, Katya says “thank God” before taking one to the neck and one to the brain.

Just as Anna is about to open the container door, Sam stops her. He checks for a bomb and finds one. Opening the door just a bit, Sam sees the bomb. Callen tells him not to open the door. Telling Callen to sit tight, Sam wants his bomb kit. Sam orders Anna to leave but she’s not going anywhere. Rountree runs up with the bomb kit. Sam orders him away and Rountree listens.

Working diligently in a very small space, Sam is going to open the door without defusing the bomb. Sam is able to get himself and Anna into the container. Sam is able to deactivate the bomb’s triggers, defusing the bomb. Callen and Anna hug as Sam tells them “you’re welcome.”

The Long Beach police bring Callen to Katya’s vehicle. Dead Katya, dead flunky. Callen confirms it is Katya – they have a positive ID. He doesn’t know the name of the flunky. The officer asks Callen who would do something like that. Callen lies – “I haven’t a clue.”

Walking away, Callen and Anna share I love you’s.

What head canon can be formed from here: While he was likely selling the idea of teaming up with Katya to kill Pembrook and letting her start a new life to keep himself alive long enough for the team to find him, Callen did the same thing with Joelle killing Katya and the flunky.

The Noble Maidens are all in on shipping containers. Starting with Anna wanting to send Kirkin back to Russia in one, going to Joelle and Anna being held in one and Callen here, Trained Russian female spies may be the real reason for shipping container shortage.

Shulton Pierre Cardin cologne is available online for $25.00. Not sure why Katya had to try too hard to track it down. Amazon has it.

The program has spelled Pembrook about six different ways in the closed-captioning.

Episode number: This is episode 21 of season 13 and the 301st episode overall.

#NCIS: Los Angeles Rewatch #NCIS: Los Angeles #NCIS: LA #NCIS Los Angeles #ncis la

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