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magicofthepen · 1 year

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my first instinct is to say "knock the ice from my bones" as my favorite fic of yours, because that's the one that first really struck me — both the title, as the ice association with Romana is something that (clearly, looking at my body of works lol) is very important to me, but thinking on it more, I think my favorite of yours might be "silver tongue"?? specifically the bits about Narvin, because of course — of course. Narvin, who has my whole heart and one of Romana's as well. I'm very ambiguous about my feelings toward explicitly romantic narvinromana, but I think. I think that it makes sense, in this context, but mainly and possibly only with Trey (and sometimes, in my head but never written down as of yet, the real Romana III). Trey stealing things — friendship, love, a kiss. the ice metaphors toward the end. I've always thought that is Romana II is sea-ice, Trey is like frost. bright and sharp and burning-cold, but gone so fast. so, yeah. all this to say — silver tongue has stuck with me, very very deeply.

what is your favorite fic of mine?

oooh it’s neat that you mentioned both of those because they’re among the fics I’m most personally satisfied with, but the process for each one was completely different. knock the ice from my bones was brainstormed and drafted and re-outlined and re-drafted and edited and that was a year plus long process. vs. silver tongue was drafted in a couple hours on a whim and not revised much because I was pretty satisfied with the initial draft.

but now I am Thinking and — they are similar, aren’t they? they’re both character studies of versions of Romana, they’re both about the narrative of their lives — the story Romana is telling about herself after Etra Prime, and the role Tre must play in the story of Gallifrey, a role she is exceedingly aware of. and the fics are about where the stories can be true and where they are a lie. and what it is like to be a person trying to fit into a Story. (but Romana is Allowed to defy the narrative more than Tre is, Romana is still The Protagonist and Tre is not.) my love of stories about stories sure does keep jumping out huh.

anyways! Narvin and Tre yesss. Leela can’t see Tre as Romana, but Narvin does, and so even his exasperation with her feels like a kindness because he is reacting to her like he reacts to Romana. and I loved getting inside her head and exploring how that hits her, how it hurts and heals at the same time, because these brief moments are all she’s going to get of her friends. and the knowledge that her time with them is so limited also makes her more inclined to express her feelings for them in various ways because she has nothing to lose and they deserve to know — and maybe she wants to believe they could love her back. if things were different.

and your interest in Romana + ice metaphors is always so interesting to hear about! I actually favor fire and heat as metaphors for Romana (it’s about the contrast between how strangers perceive her and how the people close to her perceive her), and I know I’ve used fire/heat metaphors from Narvin’s pov in particular. but I like the way you use ice metaphors in your work, it Works the way you write it, and it’s neat to see a different perspective! but I had to lean into the ice thing for Tre because she is choosing to Be How People Expect Her To Be — once Romana and Leela have labeled her as Someone Not To Be Trusted, that is the act she puts on. she is actively trying to convince them she is ice, rather than it just being How She Is Perceived and that distinction was also really interesting to explore.

thanks for sending this, it’s so great to hear how much you like silver tongue!! ❤️

#asks #gallifrey audios #i know i don’t separate romanas by incarnation when i tag but tre is a distinctive enough character that maybe i should have a tag for her #tre #ramblings #fic talk #swinging stars from satellites #romana

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natequarter · 2 years

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writing intervention earth backstory. grinning devil emoji

#seeing asogorey on the dash it made me think of them (divorced unmarried narvinromana)

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nonbinaryyue · 2 years

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i am enjoying writing this piece soso much like o(-( intervention earth narvinromana my beloveds....... for context he started a war across the universe for her and now she's regenerated into a version of her who... really doesn't trust him :(

No matter. The gold light of her demise blazes so brightly that he is forced to look away, and when he blinks Romana’s burning form is branded into his eyelids. She is a phoenix in her own right, new life born from her own ashes.

Shamefully he looks away as she dies, is torn apart, whichever idiom is the least inaccurate (because he doesn’t know what it is to regenerate, he doesn’t know, he doesn’t know, and he so hates to feel out of his depth). The light dims, and he is able to turn around and see whatever she is now as she falls back onto the chair she had just been desperately clinging to.

She looks up, and opens her eyes, and they are as blue as they ever were.

With a horrible jolt, Narvin realises he knows those eyes.

ooooh!!!!! Very Angsty I love :))

#this is fantastic!!!!!!!#I love your writing #please let me know when this one is done bc I would love to read it!!!!#asks

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 1 year

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“desperate need to write more narvinromana you say??” 👀👀👀👀👀

so I don’t know if you want to stick to them in the later audios, *but* since the majority of your narvinromana fics *have* been post-Enemy Lines, I would be super interested to see how you write them in say, the time when Leela has left them on the alternate Gallifrey — maybe when she’s just left them, and they’re stuck together with just each other on this hostile world and are maybe stepping into their doubles offices and rooms for the first time? or them during the civil war — maybe between series 2 and 3, on the run from Pandora and Romana trying to figure out her plan of attack and Narvin having Opinions and the very fragile alliance they have — or maybe a moment post-Fractures when Romana is isolating herself and Narvin is trying to secure the Academy and maybe he tries to talk to her?

but also I love their specific dynamic in Time War so much and I always love more Time War narvinromana stories. I know you’ve already written a few TW3 snippets, but I am so interested in any fics about them in exile, when suddenly they aren’t President and Coordinator (or Chancellor) or Coordinator and Deputy Coordinator anymore. maybe a scene/moment between Nevernor and Unity (aka post-Nevernor from what you’ve heard) that’s exploring them just living together in this constantly-on-the-verge-of-malfunctioning TARDIS as they’re following Leela’s biodata trail and the impact of that situation on them and their relationship?

but really I will be interested in anything you write with them!! <33

HOW HAVE I NEVER WRITTEN S5 NARVINROMANA BEFORE

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There's an assassination attempt at least every other Tuesday, for Rassilon's sake — all of him, every regeneration, and the Rod and robes and blasted sandals as well — and Narvin cannot stop shaking. When Leela left, he thinks she took all their collective strength with her. Maybe she was their strength.

Either way, his hands shake near-constantly these days and a part of him longs for the Axis, lonely and desolate as it may have been. At least it was safe. At least they were together. With first Braxiatel, who admittedly, Narvin did not mourn as much as he could have, and now Leela gone as well, albeit in a much different way, thank goodness, there is half of them missing. It's like losing a limb, or a heart stalling.

Romana frowns, lines between her brows deeper than Narvin can read, whenever she sees him. She's cut her hair. Lady President Romanadvoratrelundar has only had hair this short, not even to her chin, once before, and it was a great many years ago on their own version of their planet; after Etra Prime, if Narvin, who was quietly puttering along in his own shadowy work at the time, remembers correctly. This is something they do not talk about.

They don't talk about Leela, either. They talk security, and reinforcements, and politics and plans. They do not talk about Romana's hair, which Narvin keeps finding himself staring at, or the deepening worry lines between her eyes, or Narvin's shaking hands. Sometimes, Romana's hands shake as well, like she's trying hard not to fall apart, and this, too, is something they don't discuss.

If Narvin is beginning to shred apart at the seams, then Romana is about to shatter. And if Romana shatters, then Narvin will be cut open, and neither of them will ever be whole again. (Neither of them is whole to begin with. They haven't been in a long time.)

So, just once, absolutely uncharacteristic much as he hates to admit it, Narvin takes a risk. There was another attempt on her life today and as common as it is, Romana is shaking despite her own composure. The two of them are composed of contradictions. She's perched on the edge of her desk, Narvin sitting in the chair itself, which somehow seems both backwards and completely correct. Her hands are shaking and she's pretending they aren't, except that she keeps combing through her short hair, can't keep still.

Narvin catches her hand as it drops from the back of her head and for the first time this entire evening, since the sudden rush of panic and immediacy that followed her nearly being killed, again, they both are still. Romana stares at him, for just a moment, eyes wide but the worry lines disappearing, and then squeezes his hand back. Wraps his hand in both of hers until he brings the other one up to join it and closes his eyes, feeling her double-pulse in her wrists and the cold solidity of her touch. They may not be whole, but they are both here. Romana is alive; this is what matters most of all.

He wishes he trusted the guards who watch over her. He wishes he could watch over her himself, so for now, he does just that. Holds her hands for as long as she will allow and maintains the pretense of conversation when she finally pulls away so that he has an excuse to walk her to her quarters. Were he more of a courageous man he might take one of her hands again, carefully kiss her knuckles. But, no, Narvin is a coward, and they are barely friends. But they're all each other has. Sometimes, their hands shake.

#losing my mind over them again aldjskjfkajfskdhak #Lu rambles #asks #Lu writes #dweu #gallifrey #narvinromana #this is wholly unedited and i wrote it in under half an hour. i hope it's decent #if you see me constantly nodding to LTBM... yeah 😅

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 1 year

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something I threatened @fortes-fortuna-iogurtum I would write (romantic narvinromana) only way sadder than I planned (cw suicidal thoughts). also tagging @magicofthepen because she's the one who 1) sold me on this pairing as romantic and 2) brought up the concept of Them in season 5

~~~~~

All of Gallifrey knows that their Supreme Leader does not want to live. Romana's recording when she leaves them to believe she's died, and has in fact gone home, comes as little surprise; the calm in her voice as she speaks of her own death. The longing. She's long since stopped avoiding attempts on her life. The Chancellery Guard knows there's as much chance of coming upon her dead by her own hand as there is of it being an assassination. She has never been long for this world.

The first time — the only time, because the other was Trey, far too warm for a Time Lord and too solid for a Matrix projection — Narvin kisses her is the moment he, himself, realized this. She will not look him in the eye, only stares blankly down at her hands in her lap, burned and scraped from a thermal explosion she had knowingly walked into. She claimed that the safeguards in place were enough, that she could not hide herself away out of fear, but. But, but, but. Narvin knows better. He knows her well by now. He can see it all over her.

He sits down carefully beside her on the medical cot, haltingly reaches out to grab her hand to stop her picking at fresh scabs. If he simply... doesn't let go, after, there's no one who would dare comment on it. She still won't look at him. She barely even seems awake. Hardly seems alive, though he knows she is, sees her chest rise and fall as she breathes and feels the double-pulse in her wrist.

"Did you want to die?" He asks, quietly, when there's no one else in earshot. The Supreme Leader prefers to be left alone in these aftermaths, everyone knows it. They also know that her Chancellor is the one person who is exempt. Narvin, however, knows that her best friend would be, too, were that friend here. He thinks he is not enough for this; he tries anyway.

Romana sighs. "Narvin-"

"Not today," he adds, only after she's already spoken. "Not now. Did you want... did you wish to die, on Etra Prime?"

Romana's head whips up, turns to look at him with wide, icy eyes that he would describe as terrified, were he willing to admit to that in her. She looks suddenly stunned, overwhelmed and younger than he's ever seen her. By twenty years, he thinks bitterly.

Narvin has never known Romana aside from the Daleks. Very few, anymore, have. Brax had, of course, but Brax is gone. As is the version of Romanadvoratrelundar who had existed before the Daleks and twenty years imprisoned. He knows she'd been called the Ice Maiden at the Academy, but can't help thinking that she must be colder now than she was even then. There's a part of him that wishes for contrast, and another part that's terrified that he would not know her at all. Vansell had been Coordinator when she was freed, Narvin still stuck working his way up the ranks. He'd never met her before she was this. If Etra Prime had never happened, would they be here, now? Would a Romana without the Daleks be his Romana?

These are questions Narvin cannot answer and will not ask. The one he has hangs trembling in the air, even as Romana seems to go more still than he's ever seen her, except for times she was unconscious. On some kind of wild instinct perhaps learned from time spent with Leela, Narvin squeezes her hand. Romana blinks, finally, breathes again and Narvin feels like he can breathe again with her. They're both staunchly avoiding any kind of touch telepathy. This is a moment for words spoken and respect; there's a buzz where their skin touches, though maybe Narvin is imagining it.

Romana slumps further, already downtrodden posture falling into something sharply angled yet far too soft all at once, robes adding an uncanny contour that makes her look, overall, like something broken. Maybe she is. Maybe she always has been. It terrifies Narvin to follow that train of thinking. What, he has to ask then, is holding her together? What, if anything, is capable of mending her? He is afraid, though it's presumptuous even to conceive of, that in some way, the answer is him. He's afraid of the fact that he hopes it.

"Yes," Romana finally says, voice barely a whisper. She hasn't returned his grip on her hand, but she's folded up and leaning against him, weight barely noticeable. They're completely alone now. Everyone else has figured out that this is a private moment, even if one not intended for, and left them. Romana's hands are cold. "I wanted to die rather than stay there. I wanted to live, though, more. Live... free. Home. Being there was like being dead, itself, in a way." Her voice is unsteady, shaking slightly with how hard she is fighting to hold herself together. It was easier, with Leela to help. Now neither of them knows what they're doing.

Narvin nods, with enough force that even if she is not looking at him — he isn't looking at her, he will give her this dignity — she can feel it telegraphed through where they touch. "Is it like that here?" He asks next, his voice lowered as well. "Is this... like being dead?"

"It feels it," Romana whispers. "Sometimes."

"I can't claim to understand," Narvin tells her, "I can't imagine-" he sucks in a breath. "Romana," he says, her name gentle on his tongue. When she looks at him, eyes tired and hollow, he says, "I can help you suffer." He doesn't know what comes over him in that moment, only that it's overwhelming. Leela could name it, were she there, but now... but now it is only him, and Romana, and all that he knows is that neither of them can be alone and he would do anything to keep it this way.

Romana shakes her head sorrowfully. "No," she says.

"I can give you reasons not to die."

She scoffs, utterly humorless. "Like?"

Narvin looks into her face, at her mussed hair and residue from the explosion clinging to patches of her skin. In this moment, as in a great many that he is holding close to his chest, Romana is the most important thing — the only thing — in the world. This one, or any other. She may not wish to live but he can't conceive of her dying. He doesn't have or won't use a word for this.

Instead, in this moment of sorrow and vulnerability, without hope or plan, and with far more courage — perhaps simply far more need, in the end — than the kind of man he knows he is, Narvin leans over and, hand hovering just above her jaw but not quite touching, kisses her. The surprising part, the little bit of light where the grace is, is that she doesn't immediately recoil. That, in fact, after half a heartsbeat's hesitation, she actually kisses back. The faint buzz, of restrained touch telepathy and something that might be love, or the beginnings of both or either of those things, grows. It's only a few seconds, seconds that they count and compile on instinct, but it's enough.

"I'm sorry-" Narvin begins as soon as there's distance, though not much, between them, and Romana shakes her head. The ends of her hair swish in the small space between their bodies.

"That's a reason," she says softly in that quiet space.

"Is it?" He asks, barely breathing for wanting. What he wants, he isn't sure. There is nothing in his extensive training for this.

She nods. They are leaned so close together that their foreheads are almost touching. She has still not let him in her head. Narvin thinks that he would rather she doesn't. He doesn't need to know her pain that intimately. Not when he can know it out loud, when she has allowed him this. He doesn't think he wants to know a Romana he's never met.

"Narvin," she says eventually, when the only sound is their breathing. "...Chancellor," she begins again, the formality straightening her up, though there's still confusion and exhaustion unhidden in her eyes. This is how it has to be. "Will you walk me to my rooms?"

Narvin has still not, through this all, let go of her hand. He isn't even sure he knows how to let go of her anymore. "I will."

#hashtag run on sentences 4ever #hashtag girl #hashtag I'm so tired rn and I have brainworms so here's this #wholly unedited no proofread idek if it's in character but hey #I just listened to Extermination again and had feelings. that's all #Lu writes #Gallifrey #dweu #big finish gallifrey #Romana ii #narvin #narvinromana

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 1 year

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Antigone, Sophokles tr. Anne Carson // Last Hope, Paramore

#does this makes sense??#couldn't stop thinking about it while writing that narvinromana fic #Lu rambles #web weaving #compare case histories #paramore

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 1 year

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this is a few days late but re: the favorite fic of yours ask prompt — so I love your narvinromana fics so much but also I don’t think there’s One that jumps out to me as A Favorite above the others? and honestly. Like the Blind Man has to be my favorite fic of yours. you know that I am *weak* for post-Etra Prime fics and the way you write Romana in the aftermath of that trauma and how that trauma affects her interactions with everyone in the fic is just. so good. and I Remember the visceral emotional reaction I had to that fic, and That Emotional Reaction stands out above all else. so please know that 1. I remain Very Much Attached to your collective body of narvinromana work, but 2. Like the Blind Man has to be my favorite.

I have to be entirely honest all of my Narvinromana fic has been DEEPLY influenced by Freeze and Thaw by @janeturenne. that fic changed the course of my life in some small way. I read "I wished I'd gone over with you" and I think it unlocked something in my brain that allowed me to viscerally understand the way Narvin feels about Romana. not many fics have affected me that way — my own Narvinromana works are a direct reaction to that emotional and mental response I had to Freeze and Thaw. also, I suddenly have a desperate need to write more narvinromana, because I haven't written them in like... FOREVER... so if you have any prompts for something short, feel free to send them my way (keeping in mind I haven't listened to Unity or anything after yet... I stalled out due to irl busyness and and apprehension and haven't gotten up the guts to finish the series yet lol)!!!

Gurt said the same thing about LTBM being her favorite fic of mine and I am SO flattered ngl, that fic is, in a big way, my magnum opus as far as Doctor Who (and related) fandom goes, maybe just... generally, also? and it means so much to hear that it's stuck with people!!!!

#thanks for the ask!!!!!!!!#Lu rambles #ask games

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