#mary alice fancyboy

[getoutofthisplace]

Dear Gus,

After some time off of the ventilator, Mum chose not to be placed back on it when the doctors recommended doing so, and she knew that would be the death of her. The nurses moved her from CCU to a room upstairs so we could have more room as a family to spend time with her (but when we got to the room, it was smaller).

Mum had her wits about her until the end. She said goodbye in a way that seemed as if she had orchestrated it long ago. Even though she was clearly in pain and had trouble breathing, she refused to numb her senses until all her grandchildren were present. She asked how far out John was on his way in from Tahlequah and when I told her two hours, she said, “I think I can probably do that.” At that point, Mary Alice was half an hour in front of him, but he beat her to the hospital.

When everyone was in the room, Mum asked that we all hold hands. She told us to stick together as a family, to work hard, and to keep God in our lives. Then she asked that we all pray together. We assumed she would ask Will to lead the prayer because of his preacher status, but Mum led the prayer, despite the nurses telling her not to talk because of how much it would affect her breathing. And then we sang a song I didn’t know, but I later found out it was called “Angel Band.”

When it was over, Mum said, “Okay, I’m ready.” I went to the nurses’ station and told them she was ready to be put on whatever alternative to morphine they had prepared for her—she was allergic to morphine.

After the nurse left, we all stood around Mum in silence, waiting for her to die. After two or three minutes of nothing but the sound of sniffles, Mum said, “I didn’t think it would take this long.” Everyone laughed. 

She died an hour and a half later. I loved her. I’ll miss our long afternoons of talking about her life. She was a pillar of strength in our family. And irreplaceable.

Dad

Searcy, Arkansas. 9.27.2018 - 6.17pm.

#alice marie choate #donna choate #nancy fancyboy #mary alice fancyboy #Michael Quessenberry #Lee Quessenberry #mike choate #unity health #death #hospital #dying

[getoutofthisplace]

Dear Gus,

The family met at the funeral home today to get a first look at Mum--which sounds weird, but that’s what it is. Funeral will be Tuesday.

Dad

Beebe, Arkansas. 9.30.2018 - 2.36pm.

#funeral #westbrook funeral home #family #death #alice marie choate #carla choate #mike choate #mary alice fancyboy #john choate #donna quessenberry #Michael Quessenberry #will choate #donna choate

[getoutofthisplace]

Dear Gus,

Mum is in critical care with pneumonia. It doesn’t look good.

Dad

Searcy, Arkansas. 9.26.2018 - 12.12pm.

#alice marie choate #nancy choate #nancy fancyboy #mary alice fancyboy #unity health #hospital #ccu #pneumonia