#look i have my qualms with tgcf but there is also so so much i love about it

[arohuacheng]

everyone should read tgcf forever btw. unless you're gonna be weird about it

#i love this book so much. and i hate so many mxtx fans with a passion dfjhgds #like! hey! to consume this content you have to be able to think critically #and look at the author's clear internalized homophobia and fetishization of gay men without trying to justify it #and you have to be able to read a book longer than the bible. #some of those criteria are more unreasonable than others. but not being a fujoshi is not one of the unreasonable ones #throwing rocks at people. please PLEASE look at the themes and motifs #anyway if you wanna read the greatest love story ever written by someone with a base misunderstanding of their own characters... #my most beloved trans character whose transness goes completely unacknowledged by the author... #pain so deep and wrenching that it gives way to revenge that is just as painful and exacting as the event that inspired it... #look i have my qualms with tgcf but there is also so so much i love about it #obviously. says tumblr user arohuacheng. #anyway everyone go read tgcf and be normal about it please #tgcf #mxtx

[nyerus]

hi! i really like your metas, especially ones you’ve written about xie lian. i really think that you have an amazing grasp on the source material and its characters, so i was wondering what you think of feng xin? specifically his relationship with xie lian (and how his blind idolization of his highness became the ‘downfall’ of their relationship)? while rereading tgcf, i’m awed at how loyal he is to xie lian (up until book 4 ofc). this line he said in ch. 82 in particular really stuck with me -> “if it wasn’t for your highness’ appointment, i really don’t care for it. but even if you boot me back to the mortal realm and i become human again, i will still be loyal to you, your highness.”

Thank you so much, Anon! I love writing metas, and TGCF lives rent-free in my brain, so I'm always thinking about the characters and plot haha!

Feng Xin is one of my favorite characters for sure, and his relationship with Xie Lian is something that makes me cry all the time. Feng Xin is, by nature, a very loyal and straightforward person. He grew up knowing his place in the world, as Xie Lian's retainer and protector. (When we remember that he was Xie Lian's bodyguard since Xie Lian was 14, we can see aspects of that "protectiveness" that persisted throughout the years into the present day of the novel!) We can also see that Feng Xin is quite traditional when it comes to things like societal structures, royalty, etc. Unlike others, he has no qualms of royalty being "above" regular folks, and this is probably partly due to how he was raised, and due to the fact that he was with Xie Lian for years and years while Xie Lian flawlessly fulfilled that "divine" image. Xie Lian was a prodigy who excelled at everything he set his mind to, and Feng Xin would have grow up alongside him seeing that. It instilled in Feng Xin a strong sense of "he can do no wrong" because, well, that was just not something that Feng Xin ever witnessed.

Of course, Feng Xin isn't an idiot and he would have known that Xie Lian was not infallible. But that sort of idolization can sort of ingrain itself into someone's mind even subconsciously. We need only to look at like, diehard stans of [insert any celebrity or idol here] to get the point. Xie Lian was his friend, for whom Feng Xin would go to the ends of the earth. But Xie Lian was also his hero and prince. Feng Xin also would have felt a sense of duty to him, obviously. Because of all of that, Feng Xin was never able to really connect to Xie Lian on a very deep and personal level. As close as they were, there was always a line that couldn't be crossed.

The downfall of the idolization of someone is that no one can live up to the height of such pedestals. When Xie Lian fell off, it wasn't that Feng Xin disliked him from there on. He still loved Xie Lian, but it was something that Feng Xin also had difficulty understanding and accepting. Things were so chaotic at the time, especially, and he never had to contend with this before. Because of the distance between them, and also Feng Xin's naturally straightforward nature, he had difficulty with the emotional needs that arose around book 4. What Xie Lian needed at the time was a friend -- which he already thought he had. But Feng Xin was ever staunch in his role as Xie Lian's protector (which extended beyond physical protection, mind you). That line hadn't been crossed yet, but it needed to be.

I believe that they may have gotten there eventually. But neither of them were really in a position to open up to each other at that time of book 4 and such. Both of them were dealing with so much, independently. Feng Xin was still willing to stay by Xie Lian's side, but Xie Lian began to doubt for what reasons that could be. Friendship or just out of a sense of duty? His fears were not unfounded, of course, especially given that Bai Wuxang was hardcore gaslighting him all the while. Naturally though, it led to him pushing everyone away, including Feng Xin. ;v;

I have much more Feng Xin thoughts, but I'll leave it here for now!~

#tgcf #feng xin #nyerus.txt #anon #meta #asks