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innytoes · 2 years

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also: "you'd marry me if I asked, right?" for lukebobby

They're chilling at Bobby's house, and by that Luke means 'sprawled out on the tile floor in Lola's kitchen while the rickety fan blows tepid air at them'. Luke's barely even wearing a shirt, arm holes cut down to his waist, and he's still too hot. He'd take it off, but that would mean moving, which would mean death.

Bobby isn't faring much better, even though he absolutely refused to wear anything other than black. Which was dumb. Luke wishes he'd just take his shirt off. For cooling down reasons, of course. No other reason. Bobby is staring up at the ceiling fan, which also isn't doing much to cool the place down.

He was still trying to find the willpower to maybe crawl to the freezer to see if there are any ice cubes when Bobby says: "You'd marry me if I asked, right?"

Luke blinks, moving his head. Bobby is still staring straight up at the ceiling. "Sure," he agrees. Then he pauses. "Is this some kind of 'so you can't testify against me in court' thing? Are we murdering someone? Because it's too hot to murder someone."

Bobby huffs out a laugh, eyes finding Luke's for a moment. He looks impossibly fond, and Luke's stomach swoops. Then Bobby looks back up at the ceiling. "You know that my grandmother is like, super rich?" he asks, which didn't make much sense. Unless someone was harassing Lola. Luke is pretty sure he'd murder someone for that. They all would. Lola was a saint.

"Then why can't she buy an air conditioner?" he asks.

Bobby shakes his head. "No, not my Lola. My grandmother. On my dad's side." Ah, that made more sense. Luke was vaguely aware that Bobby's parents were also kind of rich, but they were never around long enough to, you know, spend any of it on their son. Or spend any time with him. Assholes.

"What does that have to do with marriage?" he asks, carefully. Maybe she was dying? Maybe her dying wish was to see her favourite grandson married? Because of course Bobby would be her favourite. He was the best.

"Turns out she has this trust fund for all her grandkids," Bobby says. "Like, a shitton of money. The lawyer just sent the paperwork over, given that we're about to graduate." Well, Bobby is. Luke hasn't been to school since Christmas. He basically lives here now.

Bobby puffs his cheeks, before blowing out a breath. "The trust fund only kicks in if you go to college for any of the three pre-approved majors," he says. "Or if you're getting married. To help kickstart your new life and to pump out more Shaws and continue the family name, and all."

Luke frowns. "Wouldn't you need to get married to a girl to do that?" he points out. "Or at least someone with a uterus?" he amends.

Bobby turns to look at him again, grin sharp. Luke's stomach flutters, the fucking traitor. "That's the assumption, but I've been over the contract seven times now. Nowhere does it say I have to marry a woman."

"Dude, nice. Taken down by heteronormativity," Luke laughs. See, he payed attention when Alex was ranting. He knew big words. With herculean effort, he moves his arm to tangle his fingers with Bobby.

"Bobbert Boba Tea Shaw," he says as seriously as he can with his cheek plastered to the tiles. "Committing trust fund fraud with you is like the second biggest reason I'd want to marry you. Let's do it. Dibs on Reggie as my best man, I bet he'd throw an amazing bachelor party."

Bobby snorts. "As if I'm not invited to your bachelor party. We can just have two, together. One insane one, and then one that Alex plans that will also go off the rails anyways." Luke nods, pleased with that plan.

They sketch out the rest of their wedding, discussing the important stuff: a colour scheme (black and blue), a venue ('I bet Willie can get us in at that weird club they work at') cake flavours (definitely chocolate), and the playlist. That last one takes at least an hour, as they debate if it's gaudy or cool to have their first dance to one of the songs from their demo.

"Wait," Bobby says all of a sudden. "You said committing fraud is the second biggest reason to marry me. What's the first?"

"Oh, I've been in love with you since fourth grade," Luke says, head still lost in playlists and music. When he looks up, Bobby is staring at him. "What? What did I say?"

They do get married, just like they plan. But instead of fraud, they just call it their 'seventh date'.

And they never get divorced.

#julie and the phantoms #fanfic #luke patterson #bobby shaw #bobbyxluke #I wrote a thing #they're stupid your honour #Lola gives Bobby away of course #does Luke make up with his parents simply so they can be at their not-actually-a-sham-anymore wedding? probably #Emily 100% cries and is so proud and it's very emotional #even though on the inside she and Mitch are like 'what the fuuuuck when did this happen'#they poll all their friends and everyone at the venues they play like 'show of hands is it gaudy to have your first dance to your own song'#Luke after the wedding: well too bad suckers we did it anyway so here's In Your Starlight #also this fic is partially inspired by the atrocious weather and humidity we keep having plz I'm Dutch I'm not meant for 35 degrees

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leviabeat · 9 months

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#volbeat #leviathan makes a poll #still counting #lola montez #for evigt #fallen #doc holliday

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ellatoone7 · 1 month

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❄︎ Trust in me ❄︎

Alexia's favourite girls series

Emilia has some concerns over her future

Emilia had known for a while that maybe football wasn’t her life. From her very first session when she was a lot younger, she always had more of a fascination with picking flowers and making daisy chains or doing cartwheels across the field instead of kicking the ball. She had started gymnastics a few years ago and had taken a very keen liking to it.

However, as she got older, she wanted to prioritise gymnastics, but the guilt of quitting football was slowly creeping up on her. It didn’t help that her older sister absolutely thrived on the football field, Emilia couldn’t help but notice how her Mami’s eyes absolutely lit up with pride as she watched Issy playing football. The last thing Emilia wanted was to disappoint her Mami. Her Mami, who went above and beyond for her and always showed up no matter what. Her Mami, who had won so many different awards for just how good she was at playing football. Her Mami, who always made her feel safe and so incredibly loved.

Emilia was always encouraged to communicate her feelings to her parents, something that was instilled into her since she was much younger. Now she was eight years old and for the first time ever she was a little bit scared to talk to her Mami. Emilia had been working up the courage to tell her Mami that she didn’t want to play football anymore, but it just so happened that Isabella had won a very important match and Mami was bringing them to get ice cream to celebrate. Mami was smiling so big, and Emilia didn’t want to be the reason her Mami got upset.

It didn’t take a lot for Alexia to notice something was wrong with Emilia. The normally animated girl was unusually quiet as she shovelled some ice cream into her mouth. Isabella was on cloud nine as she conversed with her Mami on the tactics of the game and whether they should stick or change it up slightly. “…Tal vez deberíamos poner a Lola en la delantera el próximo Partido.” Emilia’s head dropped even lower as she listened to her Mami and sister converse. Alexia got increasingly more worried as it had been at least an hour with complete radio silence from Emilia. They were on their way home now, all packed into Alexia’s Cupra as she turned the volume of Rosalia’s new song down a little.

Isabella was still mumbling away happily as she brushes a little bit of grass off her kit. Emilia was staring at her older sister, Mr Biggy clutched in her arms and Alexia thought that maybe Emilia was a little jealous over her sisters win. Completely misinterpreting the situation Alexia looks through the mirror with a small smile, “Hey Meels, you have a big match coming up too. I can’t wait to come watch you play.” Emilia’s heart clenched in her chest at the hopeful look in her Mami’s eyes and she forced a tight smile and a nod which seemed to placate an oblivious Alexia who had made the situation much worse.

Isabella smiled softly at her younger sister, “Meels, you can wear my green boots, the ones that you loved.” Emilia once again nodded before curling in on herself that little bit more. Emilia decides then and there that she wasn’t going to be selfish and just work harder at football. She didn’t want to make Isabella or Mami upset and maybe she would enjoy it. She loved watching Mami play when she used to play for Barcelona, and she loves going to Isabella’s games.

Emilia’s mind raced with all her favourite people and most of them played football, all her Tia’s who raised her on a football field, and she was now just throwing it away. Before Emilia knew it her eyes were filling with tears as she tried to swallow around the lump in her throat. The blonde tried to breath and calm herself down, but she was all worked up now and she wanted some comfort from her Mami while she still could. “Mami, No me siento bien.” She sniffled as the tears started falling down her flushed cheeks. Alexia quickly found somewhere to poll over so she could give her daughter her full attention.

Alexia unbuckled her seat belt and turned her body around to make sure Emilia hadn’t gotten sick. She was in full Mami mode, and it felt like her heart stopped beating as Emilia cried. Isabella held her little sisters’ hand with her own frown of concern and started gently rubbing her back in hopes to provide some comfort. “¿Qué pasa nena?” Alexia questioned as Emilia struggled to catch her breath until eventually, she reached out just like she used to when she was a little bit younger. Before she knew it her car door was open, and she was in her Mami’s arms. She buried her face into her Mami’s neck as she whimpered softly, clinging into her jumper as her Mami sways her gently.

Alexia was distraught as she tried to calm her daughter who she hadn’t seen this upset in a very long time. Alexia wished you were here in hopes of getting Emilia to open up, but Daniela was way too little to leave the house yet, so you stayed at home with Val. Emilia whimpered again and Alexia needed to get her home and hold her until all her hurt went away. Isabella had also got out of the car to wrap her arms around both girls. “¿Se siente mal?” Emilia had a history of motion sickness and still had trouble with long car journeys, but she had never cried like this. The only response she got was a shrug as she sniffled softly, “Vale, mi princesa, we are nearly home just a few more minutes.”

Alexia felt as if her heart was being ripped out of her chest as Emilia cried for her the minutes she put her back into her seat. Isabella tried to be a replacement, but Emilia wanted her Mami. Emilia was sobbing now completely overwhelmed by her big emotions as she squirmed in her seatbelt, whining for her Mami as she got into the front seat. Alexia tore of her jumper in hopes to calm Emilia down with her familiar smell, Isabella held it close to her sister as she gently stroked her hair. Not even Mr Biggy was comforting Emilia and she hated hat she couldn’t stop crying.

Alexia had to drive slowly as her hands had started to shake slightly and she would never put her girls in risk. Alexia didn’t stop talking the whole way home, eyes frantically checking her mirror every time Emilia cried out her name. “Mami! I need you!” Isabella cooed pressing kisses to Emilia’s temple as Alexia pulled into your driveway. Alexia’s heart was absolutely shattered, her baby needed her and nothing in the world mattered more than getting her into her arms.

“Estoy aquí mi bebé, estás a salvo. Estamos en casa y te tengo siempre mi princesa.” Isabella ran into the house bringing Alexia’s jumper and Mr Biggy as she made sure Emilia’s bed was nice a cozy. “Hey, Is, You’re home how did you get…?” You immediately noticed something was wrong when Isabella didn’t stop fidgeting with Emilia’s bed. “What’s wrong Issy?” You gently asked as you grabbed her hands, “Something’s wrong with Emilia Mama.” Isabella fell into you as she yearned for her own comfort, your mind raced with endless possibilities, but you remained calm and held your eldest close. “She wouldn’t stop crying and calling for Mami.” You shushed her gently as you focused on making her feel better.

You slowly kneeled, still a bit sore from just giving birth a few weeks ago. ‘Look at me Issy, everything’s okay. Mami has Emilia and we will find out what’s wrong, there is nothing to worry about okay.” You felt Isabella relax in your hold as you placed kisses against her cheek, “You are the best big sister ever and I love you very much.” Isabella smiled feeling a lot better now that her thoughts had been reassured. With one last kiss and a promise to let her stay up a bit later tonight, Isabella was guided to go have a shower after her game.

The minute you caught eyes with your wife you knew something was very wrong. Emilia had Alexia’s shirt in such a tight grip that you were worried her little hand was going to cramp. Alexia was walking slowly into the house as Emilia cried softly into her neck, you approached at the same pace, gently stroking her blonde hair and coaxing her out of her Mami’s shoulder. Emilia whimpered at the interruption but when she saw it was you, she cried out your name, your wife gently passed her on to you. She didn’t go far as her arms slithered around you and pulled you both into her body.

You took some time to cradle Alexia’s head and press kisses to her temple, she looked heartbroken as she leaned further into you. “It’s all okay, we are right here Meelie. What hurts baby?” Emilia shakes her head as she looks around wildly, eyes swollen and red. “Do you want to go lie down?” Emilia nodded softly as you readjusted her with a slight wince. Alexia was on full alert mode and her hands hovered your body as you placed a reassuring kiss to her lips. “Can you check on Dani, I put her down about twenty minutes ago?” Alexia nodded as she sighed softly, “Everything is going to be fine Alé.” Alexia kisses you again and coaxes Emilia out of your neck so she could give her the most loving kiss as she smoothed out her hair. “Te amo tanto mi princesa, eres mi todo.”

To her relief Emilia smiled softly and kissed her Mami’s cheek. “I love you too.” It was sniffled but it brought some much-needed relief into the heart of the former athlete. You brought her up to the safety of her room before quickly cuddling up with her, Mr Biggy found refuge in her arms, and you helped her put on her Mami’s jumper. She had calmed down significantly as she grew tired from crying, now she just wanted to talk to her Mama about the situation. “What happened sweetheart?” You noticed her looking at you intently which normally meant she had something on her mind.

“I’m scared.” Her small voice rang out as she cuddled closer to you. “Why are you scared Meels?” You guided her, knowing that she was ready to talk now. Emilia pouted as her eyes filled with tears again and you shushed her gently, rubbing her back until she calmed down. “You can tell me and Mami anything, you know that my baby.” Emilia nodded as her eyes shined from her tears. Her small fingers wrapped around Mr Biggy’s ear as she mumbled something you couldn’t understand. You pulled her impossibly closer, offering your left hand so she could play with your wedding ring something she always used to calm herself down. “I didn’t hear that Meels.” You gently told her as she took a deep breath.

“I don’t…want to play…football anymore.” She stuttered as the words tumbled out; you could see the tension leave her body as she finally told you, her problem. You were incredibly relieved that this is all it was, but you knew exactly what the problem was and why Emilia wanted her Mami so bad in the car. “Meels I know, your gymnastics is starting to clash with it. Mami had been talking to your football coach to prepare them for your leave.” Emilia sat up slowly as she processed the information she was just given. “Mami won’t be upset.” You giggle softly at the pout on her face, “Meels, Mami is going to be so relieved when she hears that this is why you were crying.” Emilia perked up, “Really? Promise?” You held out your pink as she beamed brightly, “Pinky promise.”

You kissed her head, “Your Mami loves you so much not just for the things you do but for being you. Do you want to know a secret?” Emilia nodded with a curious head tilt, “Mami was the one who suggested you do Gymnastics when she saw your cartwheels.” Emilia nearly burst with joy as she clung onto you tightly. “I am so proud of you for telling me. Did you get very overwhelmed?” You asked trying to figure out how her emotions might have taken over so you can be more prepared next time.

“My thoughts made me worried. I didn’t want to upset Isabella or my Tia’s.” You kissed her again, as she cuddled Mr Biggy. “Your Tia’s love you so much Meels and Isabella will be delighted she gets to keep the goals all to herself.” Emilia giggled as you tickled her, “I want Mami.” You nodded knowing that your wife wanted Emilia right now too. It was as if Alexia knew her daughter was looking for her as there was a soft knock at the door. Alexia had calmed down a little bit now that she was home with her family, Daniela was so tiny, and Alexia softly rocked her as she snoozed. Alexia would be lying if she didn’t say she was walking considerably slower past Emilia’s door, but it was worth it when she heard her favourite sound, Emilia’s giggle.

Emilia lit up at the sight of her and Alexia had to stop herself from running to the other side of the room to get to her. Alexia got under the covers as Emilia fell into her. Your eyes told Alexia all she needed to know; it wasn’t anything horrific. You let them have their cuddle before encouraging Emilia to tell your wife what was wrong. Emilia settled on top of her Mami before locking her fingers with hers, “Mami I don’t want to play football anymore.” There was no shift in Alexia’s smile as she stared up adoringly at her daughter, she sat up and cupped her face. “Te amo mucho mi princesa. I don’t care what you do as long as you are happy.”

Emilia smiles happily as she rests against her Mami’s chest. “You have a gymnastic competition next week and all you Tia’s want to come. Is that okay?” Emilia nodded tiredly as she cuddled Mr Biggy, “I would love that.” Alexia kissed her hair softly before lying down and bringing her to her chest. “I’m going to stay with her for a bit.” You nodded softly as you leaned down to kiss her. “You are the greatest mother Alexia Putellas, never forget that.”

#alexia putellas #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas imagines #woso x reader #woso imagine #woso imagines #woso #barcelona femeni #alexia's favourite girls

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hotvintagepoll · 20 days

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Propaganda

Anouk Aimée (La Dolce Vita, Lola)—I went to look at pictures of Anouk Aimée to inspire me to write some propaganda, but then I got too distracted by how pretty she was, forgot what I was doing and just kept on looking at more pictures with no thoughts going through my mind except "wow....women beautiful.." But I will say that Anouk Aimée is one of the most stunning actresses I've ever seen. I mean, her eyebrows, her nose, her charming smile, her cheekbones... I'm sorry I got distracted looking at pictures of her again. Anyway, she's so pretty and captivating on screen!!!! Vote for her!!!!!!

Lucille Ball (Beauty for the Asking, Two Smart People, Go Chase Yourself)— important propaganda: lucille ball in ziegfeld follies bedecked in pink feathers and cracking a whip at a horde of catgirls [video below the cut]

This is round 3 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Anouk Aimée:

Linked gifset

Lucille Ball:

youtube

THE girlboss of all time

Before she was a prolific producer or television actress Lucy was a Hollywood starlet. Check her out with her blonde hair before she always had an updo.

A powerhouse of comedy!!! Funny people are hotter, I don't make the rules

#lucille ball #anouk aimée #hotvintagepoll #fuck that old woman #ladies 3 #Youtube

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khaliarart · 7 months

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Thanks for voting on my poll!! This was so much fun to make.

Let me get emotional on main real quick because it‘s Aka‘s bday (4 years!! sheesh) and that gives me the right to be annoying.

I didn‘t even want an irkensona when I joined the fandom, I rarely saw any of those so the concept was strange to me. But my crush at the time had made an irkensona (you might have heard of Dr. Lola) so naturally I whipped up Aka in about 10 minutes to ship with Lola. Crazy enough it worked out, said crush is now my gf of 4 years<3

I’m really glad the characters sticked, too. They changed my perception of art and really got me into creating my own stories.

Now who wants to see the first art of Aka? Dated 29/09/2019

#i know i only ever draw her miserable but did you know that’s actually a sign of a healthy blorbo #don’t look that up #invader zim #iz #irken #irkensona #my art

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alister312 · 1 year

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MINOR CHARACTER MARCH MADNESS

Get ready for a March Madness Tournament for all the kid characters who exist only in the background, or only once, or just not nearly enough times in South Park. Each poll will last a day, with multiple polls going every day (at least for the start). I tried my best to pick truly minor characters but if you think one isn't minor enough or are sad I forgot one... sorry I don't feel like rearranging the entire tournament at this point 😅

Each character has been sorted into seeds 1-16 based on how prevalent I think they still are in people's memories and then paired up just like regular March Madness (i.e. 1 vs 16, 2 vs 15, etc) so apologies if some early match ups seem unfair. It'll hopefully make any upsets that much more exciting!

And now... the bracket!

See the match ups and follow the rounds below the cut.

ROUND 1—BRACKET 1

Damien Thorn vs Katie Gelson

Annie Knitts vs Sally Darson

Bradley ("Cartman Sucks") vs Baahir Hassen Abdul Hakeem

Mark Cotswolds vs Thad Jarvis

Nelly vs Flora Larsen

Jason White vs Josh Myers

Lizzy vs Cartman's kids (Post Covid)

Charlotte vs Lexus

ROUND 1—BRACKET 2

Gregory of Yardale vs Isiah Jordan

Gary Harrison vs Esther

Rebecca Cotswolds vs Alejandro White

Hebert Pocket vs Marcus Preston

Sophie Gray vs Heather Williams

Terrance Mephesto vs Corey Lanskin

Blanket vs Kyle's kids (Post Covid)

Mercedes vs New Kid/Douchebag

ROUND 1—BRACKET 3

Tricia Tucker vs Davey Solokov

Christophe/Ze Mole vs Lisa Berger

Estella Havisham vs Yao

Kevin Stoley vs Bridon Gueermo

DogPoo Petsuski vs Larry Feegan

Lola vs Tammy Warner

Filmore Anderson vs Chris Donnely

Bill Allen vs Porsche

ROUND 1—BRACKET 4

Leslie Meyers vs Kip Drordy

Thomas vs Brimmy

Trent Boyett vs Francis

Millie Larsen vs Gavin Throttle

David Rodriguez vs Tammy Nelson

Powder/Sally Turner vs Douglas

Kelly ("Rainforest Shmainforest") vs Jenny Simons

Fosse McDonald vs Ferrari

#minor character march madness #south park #sp #sp fandom #south park characters #feel free to make your own bracket predictions!!#sp mcmm #<- tag im coining for my own use at least

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bestygogirl · 7 months

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BEST YGO GIRL TOURNAMENT

Submissions: Closed

Tournament begins evening of September 26. Polls will last one week.

There will be 64 match ups in round 1 and to make it easier, these will be split up into four groups of 16.

I will not reblog propaganda that is bashing one opponent rather than being primarily focused on supporting one.

Mod IS biased but won't be voting.

Groups and match ups under the cut!

(match orders subject to change)

Group A:

Barbara VS Rovian Kirishima

Aqua VS Yoko Sakaki

Eve VS Sushiko Maki

Gloria Tyler VS Princess G

Dog-Chan VS Ranran Nanahoshi

Melissa Claire VS Miyu Sugisaki

Brooke Walker/Umimi VS Epoch

Himika Akaba VS Queen

Akari Tsukumo VS Aileen Rao

Reira Akaba VS Kyoko Taki

Luna (zexal manga) VS Sorako Noodle

Grace Tyler VS Sunavalon Dryatrentiay

Cathy Katherine VS Manya Atachi

Ray Akaba VS Kiku Kamishirakawa

E’Rah VS Asaka Mutsuba

Houchun Mieru VS Nanaho Nanahoshi

Group B:

Yuzu Hiragi VS Entermate Uni

Aoi Zaizen/Blue Angel VS Entermate Corn

Sayaka Sasayama VS Dian Keto

Mimi Atachi VS Diabellestar

Asana Mutsuba VS Cyber Tutu

Yuamu Ohdo VS Dark Magician Girl

Ranze Nanahoshi VS Darklord Ixchel

Yuna Goha VS Cyber Angel Dakini

Light Tsukiko VS Blue Eyes Abyss Dragon

Rebecca Hawkins VS Condemned Darklord/Maiden/Witch

Ecclesia VS Baronne de Fleur

Yugi’s Mom VS Ash Blossom & Joyus Spring

Echo VS Sky Striker Raye

Princess Rose VS Apollousa

Mizuchi Saiou VS Tour Guide from the Underworld

Emi Ayukawa VS Sunny

Group C:

Masumi Kotsu VS Winda

Tiger (Haruka Kamijo) VS Traptrix Rafflesia

Yuka Goha VS Tearlaments Kitkallos

Anzu Mazaki VS Silent Magician

Mitsuko Hiramori VS Sevens Road Wtich

Isis Ishtar VS Pumprincess of Ghosts

Mana VS Prima Guitarna

Rei Saotome VS Performapal Ladyange

Luna VS Nini the Mirror Mikanko

Tome VS Lyna the Light Charmer

Yubel VS Madolche Queen Tiaramisu

Mikage Sagari VS Insect Queen

Anna Kozuki VS Lady Labyrinth

Misty Lola VS Kitt

Rio Kamishiro VS Hu-Li the Jewel Mikanko

Ayu Ayukawa VS Ha-Ra the Sword Mikanko

Group D:

Serena/Celina VS Emma

Asuka Tenjoin VS Miss Mystery

Carly Nagisa VS Haru Tsukumo

Miho Nosaka VS Patty

Kotori Mizuki VS Momoe Hamaguchi

Romin Kirishima VS Junko Makurada

Ghost Girl/Emma Bessho VS Sera

Ruri Kurosaki VS Vivian Wong

Mai Kujaku VS Dinois Velgear

Kisara VS Droite

Shizuka Kawai VS Princess Adena

Camula VS Risa Kagayama

Martha VS Tilla Mook

Aki Izayou VS Xiangsheng Magician

Sherry LeBlanc VS Blaze Maiden, Rino

Rin VS Underworld Goddess of the Closed World

#mod post

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salt-in-my-eyes · 4 months

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A BEAUTIFUL FIC I MADE. BASED ON A REAL STORY. TW A LOT OF PISS MENTIONS. ITS SET IN A BATHROOM. I DONT HAVE A PISS KINK. I PROMISE. THIS WAS A SILLY JOKE I MADE ON THE OSEMANVERSE DISCORD SERVER (were insane)

I sat on the loo, wincing horridly at the temperature of my urine. As i relieved myself i realised there was no paper to wipe with. I unlocked my phone and opened up discord, clicking on my most recent server: “Osemanverse!!” in the process. I informed them of my situation with some otherwise inappropriate words of which i got very few sorrowful responses. Allister was concerned for my bowels, and Xini decided it would be appropriate to mention that i am pregnant, therefore it was likely i did need my bowels checking out. I thanked lola, as she was the main one to understand the pain i was in.

I asked if anyone could send me some spare toilet paper via email, and Xini was willing. I sent them my gmail address and waited. Meanwhile, Ro suggested a very disturbing method of wiping, which i did not concede to, the method was to use a stock image of toilet paper and wipe with that, hoping i dont get the liquid in the charging port in the process. They then followed up with that thats what they do when they run out, allister was concerned with this information. Xini emails me an emoji of toilet roll and i respond with a thank you.

When I fully return to the server i find a confused ro, asking why we are emailing things; i respond with the fact i needed something to wipe with, which confuses them more as they say: “so you email it?” and then promptly after it turns out they also need to urinate.

I inform them that i am infact waiting for my rear end to dry and we have a short conversation about my use of the word “loo.” i change the subject by asking if they want a bathroom “check” and dont wait for a response before sending the picture; xini responds disrespectfully with “your bathroom looks dehydrated”

I finally decide its time for plan B, and send a picture of the cardboard roll used to hold toilet tissue and caption it with something along the lines of “contemplating using this.” Xini was not pleased. But soon replied to my afformentioned email with “youre welcome sweet cheeks” i make an inappropriate joke about this, but we continued on.

I soon realised it was the cardboard or nothing, Xini became a nerd and told me about microtears. Allister appeared once more, and wanted to know if we were still on about piss. Nobody replied. I randomly decided to inform them about the time i had to use the cardboard roll for faeces, xini continued being a nerd and informed me not to do that; i was absolutely baffled at that statement because i had no other options, and wondered if she expected me to sit there forever. Allisters statement was worse though, as he said to use my hand. The following part of the conversation was a bit strange as we had a miscommunication where i thought Xini was implying to wipe with my poor dog, Gerry.

I decided it would be a good idea to throw the cardboard out of reach. I then had nothing to wipe with. Ro suggested using a towel. I found another cardboard roll, and xini nerded out once more. Lola shared her own bathroom story, as a new character enters the scene: Oliver! I tell them to catch up with the conversation as they have missed a lot.

I felt faeces coming along, and panicked. I could not go through the pain of wiping that with cardboard for the second time in my life. Allister suggested running to receive the paper but i couldnt as my lower half was exposed.

Finally, a good idea was shared as Ro mentioned using pads, meanwhile they were all concerned on how Oliver allegedly doesnt wash his rear. Allister tells us he eats piss, Oliver claims its his diet. Alli then continues by saying (and i quote) “i swear theres a thing where you shit in a condom and freeze it” “and use it as a…” which concerns all of us.

I decide to start a poll using reactions, the options being to vote either wipe with pads or wipe with cardboard. They both tie. Xini suggests i use toilet roll, likely forgetting that this entire incident was caused because of lack of the paper. I finally decide to use the pads, but by this time my coin slot was dry, then i felt a drip. It splashed into the water, a tear fell from my eye (not really.) turned out…i was not dry. I had to wipe with the pad, and flushed it down, which i shouldnt have done because its not flushable but i wasnt thinking straight. I was free from the bathroom.

tags : @xini-the-octonaut @michaelnotholden @bored-boring-and-tired @artisthedgehog @0s3manv3rse @michaelholdenenjoyer @unknown-leaf @CorryGlover

#tw piss #I PRO<ISEI I DONT HAVE APISS KINK #chapter one #osemanverse discord stories

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stargazingcarol · 4 months

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I've been fighting for my life while wrapping presents. This is only my second year wrapping presents in all of my life (I'm 26) and like I've looked up videos on YouTube and I try I fucking try but they're still not the fucking best if I'm being completely honest. No one taught me and I didn't wanna ask my parents cause the presents were for THEM. I feel like this year I improved but again not the best still, lol. Also if y'all wanna say where u learned (videos or class, etc) or if a person taught you? I'm also gonna vote no bc even tho I feel like I'm better than last year they could be better lol.

#wrapping presents #christmas poll #gifting #presents #christmas #also this doesnt have to be about Christmas at all but yeah #just gifts/presents in general!#tumblr poll #polls #lola makes polls

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100-sexiest · 5 months

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Voting Starts Jan 1st 2024

There's still time to add your suggestions to the vote, to find the top 100 females to goon to. Nominations must be well known, ie people would be aware of Googling this person to goon to etc to make them eligible to goon material. Your friend may be hot etc but no one will be able to goon to her if she can't be found. Other than that, anything else goes. Real or fictional, current era or from past era etc. Maybe later on we'll do a hot friend contest...

Here is a list of all current nominations put forward over the last 24 hours. If want other names to be entered, DM me @100-sexiest and I'll add them. And then come the new year, polls will open to find the most goonable goon fuel possible!

Current Nominations

Addison Rae

Alena Shishkova

Alexa Bliss

Alexis Ren

Alice Delish

Alla Bruletova

Amara Cordova

Amber Heard

Amelie Zilber

Amouranth

Amy Childs

Amy Schumer

Ana De Armas

Angela White

Anna Kendrick

Anna Nystrom

Anne Hathaway

Anya Taylor-Joy

Anyuta Rai

Ariana Grande

Aspen Mansfield

Asuna Yuuki

Aubrey Plaza

Autumn Falls

Ava Max

Avril Lavigne

Bebe Rexha

Bella Hadid

Bella Thorne

Belle Delphine

Bella Poarch

Bhad Bhabie

Billie Faiers

Breckie Hill

Britney Spears

Camilo Cabello

Cara Delvigne

Carmella Rose

Charli D'Amelio

Charli XCX

Charlotte Dawson

Charlotte Lawrence

Charly Jordan

Cherry Crush

Chloe Grace Moretz

Chloe Khan

Chloe Sims

Coconut Kitty

Corinna Kopf

Courtney Stodden

Daisy Keech

Daisy Ridley

Danielle Mason

Demi Rose

Dove Cameron

Elisha Herbert

Elizabeth Olsen

Emily Elizabeth

Emily Feld

Emma Kotos

Emma Roberts

Emma Stone

Emma Watson

Eva Elfie

Faith Seed

Foxy Menagerie

Gigi Hadid

Greta Thunberg

Hailee Steinfeld

Hailey Bieber

Hailey Sigmond

Hannah OwO

Hannah Palmer

Havanna Winter

Holly Hagan

Ichinose Asuna

Iggy Azalea

Ivanka Peach

Ivanka Trump

Jemima Robinson

Jenna Ortega

Jessica Weaver

Jesy Nelson

Jordyn Jones

Julia Burch

Kali Roses

Kate Mara

Kate Moss

Katelyn Elizabeth

Katie Price

Katie Sigmond

Katy Perry

Kelsey Calemine

Kendall Jenner

Kendra Wilkinson

Khloe Kardashian

Kiernan Shipka

Kim Kardashian

Kourtney Kardashian

Kristen Hancher

Kyla Dodds

Kylie Jenner

Lara Croft

Lauren Burch

Lauren Conrad

Lauren Pope

Lea Elui

Lele Pons

Lily Collins

Lily Easton

Lindsay Lohan

Lois Griffin

Lola Bynny

Loren Gray

Lucy Hale

Madi Teeuws

Madison Beer

Maggie Lindemann

Malu Trevejo

Maria Domark

Margot Robbie

Megan Fox

Meika Woollard

Mia Malkova

Miley Cyrus

Millie Mackintosh

Mishka Silva

Molly-Mae Hague

Morgan Harvill

Natalia Fadeev

Nicki Minaj

Nicole Demora

Olivia Dunne

Olivia Ponton

Paige Thorn

Paris Hilton

Piper Rockelle

Pokimane

Polina Malinovskaya

Polly Marchant

Power

Presley Elise

Rachel Brockman

Rachel Cook

Ramona Flowers

Renee Herbert

Rias Gremory

Rihanna

Riley Reid

Roberta Tubbs

Rooney Mara

Rolyat

Rubi Rose

Sabrina Carpenter

Samara Weaving

Sarah Hyland

Sarah Michelle Gellar

Scarlet Johnasson

Selena Gomez

Shakira

Sicily Rose

Skyla Jay Carpenter

Sophie Grace

Summer Glau

Sydney Sweeny

Tammy Hembrow

Taylor Swift

Tila Tequila

Vanessa Hudgens

Veronica Lake

Vicky Pattison

Violet Summers

Whitney Thornqvist

Willow Hand

Yor Forger

Zendaya

Zoe Sugg

Zoey Deutch

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lordoftherazzles · 8 months

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Thank you for the tag @lola-theshowgrl!! The last time I did a game like this (tho a little different), it actually worked and I knocked a chapter off my August task list. So, here are the rest of my tasks for this month with this game!

Rules: Make a poll listing the tasks you need to work on for your project/WIP. Votes determine the order things get done!

I’m hoping to knock all of these of these off my list, and maybe have time for more things!

Non-obligatory tags for: @sunnyrosewritesstuff @i-did-not-mean-to @lathalea @middleearthpixie @the-girl-with-the-algebra-book @fantasyinallforms @myeaglesong and anyone else who wants to play!

#tag game #thank you lola!#bagginshield #these help me a lot actually lol

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pigtailpoll · 1 year

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PIGTAIL POLL !! :D

currently running :

lily hoshikawa vs orange blossom

ICON BRACKET

miku hatsune vs usagi tsukino

ABOUT THA ICON BRACKET : tha eight most iconic pigtail characters ( decided both by iconicness and tha amount of submissions they received ) will compete in an adjacent bracket . tha winner will then face off against tha winner of tha main pigtail bracket . this is liek what they do in sports , where certain teams get to skip matches and go straight to tha finals . this way icons can be included but its more exciting ( and fair ) than watching them decimate their opponents each round before making it to tha finals anyways

entire 128 character bracket is too large to take a screenshot of but it looks liek this , and will ( obviously ) be done in sections . bracket list below tha readmore , straight down tha left side and then straight down tha right !! :D

LEFT SIDE

1 asa mitaka ( chainsaw man )

2 izumo kamiki ( ao no exorcist )

3 ashley spinelli ( reccess )

4 creepie ( growing up creepie )

5 bloody eye ( bloody mary )

6 boo ( monsters inc )

7 choso ( jjk )

8 muffet ( undertale )

9 sakura hanazono ( kaichou wa maid-sama )

10 mikan sakura ( gakuen alice )

11 shizuku mizutani ( my little monster )

12 retoree ( show by rock )

13 chiyo mihama ( azumanga diaoh )

14 maka albarn ( soul eater )

15 black rock shooter ( brs )

16 lyra ( pkmn )

17 jill ( drill dozer )

18 penny ( inspector gadget )

19 elizabeth midford ( kuroshitsuji )

20 anne halford ( sugar apple fairy tale )

21 lilie ( princess tutu )

22 jess ( badanamu )

23 yaya yuki ( shugo chara )

24 sana futaba ( magia record : pmm )

25 sana kurata ( kodomo no omocha )

26 makima kirameki ( re : creators )

27 cherry cookie ( cookie run )

28 twintelle ( ARMS )

29 bubbles utonium ( ppg )

30 yokune ruko ( UTAU )

31 entrapta ( she-ra and the pop )

32 ling xiaoyu ( tekken )

33 garu ( pucca )

34 sarasa watanabe ( kageki shoujo )

35 mio naganohara ( nichijou )

36 joon yorigami ( touhou )

37 eleanor miller ( alvin and the chipmunks )

38 gosalyn mallard ( darkwing duck )

39 mallow ( pkmn )

40 love momozono ( fresh precure )

41 nadeshiko kagamihara ( yuru camp )

42 angelica pickles ( rugrats )

43 gretchen grundler ( reccess )

44 lotta zehybe ( charlie and lola )

45 pinky cooper ( pinky and pepper forever )

46 brat plutonium ( ppg )

47 dynamo ( ppg )

48 jinmay ( super robot money team hyperforce go )

49 xinyan ( genshin impact )

50 miyuki hoshizora ( smile precure )

51 hu tao ( genshin impact )

52 sal fisher ( sally face )

53 natsuki mamiya ( gogo sentai boukenger )

54 dee dee ( dexter's laboratory )

55 princess morbucks ( ppg )

56 trixie carter ( american dragon jake long )

57 popuko ( pop team epic )

58 biscuit krueger ( hunter x hunter )

59 celestia ludenberg ( dangan ronpa )

60 kagami hiiragi ( lucky star )

61 juliet starling ( lollipop chainsaw )

62 ruru amour ( hug itto! precure )

63 aki narukami ( misao )

64 rabi en rose ( di gi charat )

RIGHT SIDE

65 brianna dulce ( rainbow high )

66 aria blaze ( mlp : equestria girls )

67 ame-chan ( needy girl overdose )

68 aoi kanzaki ( kimetsu no yaiba )

69 sylvia christel ( no more heroes )

70 ginger breadhouse ( ever after high )

71 kohane azusawa ( project sekai )

72 bronya zaychik ( honkai impact 3rd )

73 saki tenma ( project sekai )

74 riruka dokugamine ( bleach )

75 draculara ( monster high )

76 ichigo momomiya ( tokyo mew mew )

77 ann takamaki ( persona 5 )

78 yayoi takatsuki ( THE iDOLM@STER )

79 hana makihatayama ( ojamajo doremi )

80 nina sakura ( ultra maniac )

81 rise kujikawa ( persona 4 )

82 shushang ( honkai star rail )

83 mei kusakabe ( my neighbor totoro )

84 lily hoshikawa ( zombie land saga )

85 dj cookie ( cookie run )

86 pippi longstocking ( pippi longstocking )

87 pink ( mahou shoujo magical destroyers )

88 piper pinwheeler ( robots )

89 valerie amaranth ( magical warrior diamond heart )

90 twin turbo ( uma musume : pretty derby )

91 tart ( tokyo mew mew )

92 nagisa shiota ( assassination classroom )

93 drossel von flügel ( fireball )

94 najika kazami ( kitchen princess )

95 chinatsu kuramoto ( flying witch )

96 vendetta ( making friends )

97 sorano appare ( appare-ranman! )

98 sunny madison ( rainbow high )

99 jenny wakeman ( my life as a teenage robot )

100 barbara ( genshin impact )

101 nico yazawa ( love live! )

102 ichika usami ( kirakira precure a la mode )

103 ruli ( aikatsu planet!)

104 hay lin ( w.i.t.c.h )

105 teto kasane ( UTAU )

106 marnie ( pkmn )

107 robin ( f ) ( fire emblem awakening )

108 hikaru hoshina ( star twinkle precure )

109 hilda valentine goneril ( fire emblem : three houses )

110 falulu ( pripara )

111 kagura izumi ( ressha sentai toqger )

112 nico niiyama ( kiznaiver )

113 tsunade ( naruto )

114 lucia nanami ( mermaid melody pichi pichi pitch )

115 raki kiseki ( aikatsu on parade! )

116 ranmaru kirino ( inazuma eleven go! )

117 emiru aisaki ( hug itto! precure )

118 q84 ( hello charlotte )

119 nozomi tojo ( love live! )

120 klee ( genshin impact )

121 mimi valentine ( vtube )

122 gerti giggles ( spy kids )

123 kitty cheshire ( ever after high )

124 orange blossom ( strawberry shortcake )

125 miku imamura ( denji sentai megaranger )

126 agitha ( loz : twilight princess )

127 glenda ( petite princess yucie )

128 pepper ( pinky and pepper forever )

#pinned #pigtailpoll #pigtail poll #overdose mention tw #in tha title of a source if you open tha bracket list !!

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