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beforeastorm · 8 months

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Fic Stats!

rules: give us the links to your fic with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the least words. H/t to @the-amber-raven I saw them do it and got inspired.

If you do want to check them out, potential triggers are tagged on AO3 and/or are in the author’s notes!

1. Most hits: No surprise here - Break Glass in Case of Emergency AKA a weirdly prescient spec fic for 9-1-1 s6ep11.

Fandom: 9-1-1 | Pairing: Buddie | Word Count: 2,984

Brief description: Eddie’s mind wandered to the red folder, tucked high up in the back of his closet. He recalled back to a conversation he had with Buck, almost a year ago at this point:

“It’s an insurance policy; a break glass in case of emergency. A trump card.”

“One I really hope we’ll never have to use.”

“But if we have to, we’ll be really glad we did this.”

When hospital policy doesn't allow Chris, as an unrelated minor, to visit a comatose post-lightning strike Buck in the ICU, Eddie has a solution. Unfortunately, that involves sharing some pretty personal information in a waiting room filled with the 118.

2. Second most kudos: Again, expected - Mayday Mayday Mayday: Firefighter Down AKA outsider POV/reactions for the lightning strike.

Fandom: 9-1-1 | Pairing: Gen/pre-Buddie | Word Count: 7,748

Brief description: A mayday call, much like a stone cast into a pond, sends out ripples in all directions. Those closest to the epicenter feel the greatest turbulence, while those farthest away may only feel the slightest tremor. These are the ripples from “Mayday mayday mayday, this is Captain Nash, 118, we have a firefighter down at MacArthur Park Apartment Fire. We need an additional Task Force and Rescue immediately.”

AKA Trauma has a splash zone, and when you’re Evan ‘Buck’ Buckley getting hit by lightning, it’s a pretty big one. A look at what various 9-1-1 characters were doing when they learned what happened, and how they responded.

3. Third most comments: At first, I was surprised, but then I remembered that everyone told me how much this fic hurt them (/affectionate). It’s Quiet Uptown AKA the Hamilton songfic where Chris doesn’t survive the Tsunami.

Fandom: 9-1-1 | Pairing: Buddie | Word Count: 3,253

Brief description:

There are moments that the words don't reach There is suffering too terrible to name You hold your child as tight as you can And push away the unimaginable The moments when you’re in so deep It feels easier to just swim down So Buck and Eddie move uptown And learn to live with the unimaginable

OR: Chris doesn’t survive the Tsunami – eighteen-ish vignettes on grief and loss as mediated through Hamilton’s “It’s Quiet Uptown.”

This should be obvious based on the description, but warning for major character death.

4. Fourth most bookmarks: Conveniently, it’s the same whether using stats or works page. PANIK(kar)! AT THE (buddie)DISCO aka the silly little Budvi throuple fic.

Fandom: 9-1-1 | Pairing: Buddie, Budvi (Buck/Eddie/Ravi) | Word Count: 2,216

Brief description: "Hen would know. She probably should have waited and cooled off before confronting them because her own history of being unfaithful to Karen had bubbled to the surface and she could only see red. She had shoved a squawking Chimney into her car and drove only semi-recklessly to Eddie’s house. Well, Buck-and-Eddie’s-soon-to-be-just-Eddie’s house. Her plan was simple: if Eddie answered the door, rat Buck out, door dash a shit ton of ice cream, and let Chim sic Maddie on Buck. If Buck answered the door? Verbally beat Buck senseless until Chim shipped him off to Maddie’s to get another talking to, then find Eddie and door dash a shit ton of ice cream."

Hen sees Buck and Ravi share an intimate moment in the locker room. Buck, who was dating Eddie Diaz. She and Chimney go to confront Buck/console Eddie, but quickly discover there's more to the Buck/Eddie/Ravi relationship than meets the eye.

5. Fifth most words: Break Glass in Case of Emergency again.

Fandom: 9-1-1 | Pairing: Buddie | Word Count: 2,898

Brief description: See #1.

Least amount of words: So it’s technically PANIK(kar)! AT THE (buddie)DISCO but I don’t want to end this with 2 repeats so I’m going to bend the rules and do the least amount of words (not yet featured): Confessions in the Rain AKA me trying to fix that wild cemetery scene.

Fandom: 9-1-1 | Pairing: Buddie | Word Count: 3,106

Brief description: “I had 12 hours to come up with a speech, and 12 hours to mull over advice I’ve gotten from like four dying old people - how whack IS that, anyway - but” and even though Eddie wasn’t looking at him, he caught the motion of Buck flinging his arms outward, “I don’t have a speech. I just have me, and I have so much love for you and Chris, I think it might actually be the thing that finally kills me. And if you want, you can have me too.”

---

Eddie considers a move to Texas during a visit to his parents and drinks coffee. Buck drives for 25 hours, speed runs life advice from four dead old people, and confesses his love. Chris mostly rolls his eyes at his dads.

#9 1 1 #buddie #9 1 1 fic #9 1 1 fanfiction #ao3 fanfic #ao3

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wpdariacutnes · 6 days

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🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐

Me: well but lezbian flag long backstory but I knows someone take like your look more look had trauma a me more idk expleing whatever your sexuality ex get for so rat

Yes sound like edgy dumb but enifing more not? A gest

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And canda more hit long life a hospital like enifing better mean like take you care and look like enifing better had it ( like i dont give a fuck das enifing been nice kid )

Sooo canda enifing bit code working more none fine me but DIA like see gril get wings on head but lot body fine and more guy a omost level 3 a cut face and arm and limps enifing like dys a not Real but been uncanny been huge like 180 side a and enifing did code dys take a drowing because same act like normal persen someone woring me a worts get "panik chagu like twiching rage lafing" soooo enifing sounds you knows it

Sooo enifing parents take care enifing bit fine like someone time yes omost been jarkass but someone more dumb someone or chraing say get little autism because me get so smole because past a life been little fely or kid canda not so normal toking only get toking is 10 years old a self start toking soo dys why sund more joke me neck omost

So yeah been a lot self code filings and Real heppend but a say dont take self like code your cut someone is none rezan im fine enifing fine dys fun a fun ugh

🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐🍟⭐

#megamancomunity #mereal #wpexpleing #parents take rule #youtube

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clementinesgulag · 4 years

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About Me

sof

tagged by @emberstreak thank youuuuuu

rules answer some questions and tag some bloggers you wanna get to know better.

name: Persia Rose

nickname: perg, persie, unwanted lifeform

gender: female

sexuality: bi bi bi

height: 5′1

languages: English, idiot’s level Japanese, the french subway system

nationality: Australian//Engilsh

current time: 10:30am

favorite season: autumn

favorite flower: blue hydrangeasss, roses

favorite scent: roses, coffee, lavender, cinnamon

favorite color: RED

favorite animal: cats, rats and raccoons

favorite fictional characters: queen kagome, inuyasha, kyo, tohru (fruits basket), leafpool, crowfeather (warrior cats hell babbbyyyyyyyy)

average hours of sleep: a lot, i’m basically dormant 24/7 drinking that sloth juice

coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: hot chocolate!!! but coffee keeps me alive

number of blankets you sleep with: as many as possible without melting + weighted blankie because i....panik

dogs or cats: cats

dream trip: japan//tour of european castles/churches//american ghost tour baby

dream job: artist/author

followers: 1, 032

blog established: uuhhhhh sometime this year (june???)

reason for my url: my pet rat clementine fucking HATES her cage and every time she’s put back in my friends call it her little gulag

random fact: i have very vivid dreams!! 9/10 dreams i have are lucid and oft-times prophetic. all times pathetic.

Tagging: @narakuya @inuyashasforest @chaoticgouda @sofidoodles-blog @inuykago @inuyashasimp

None of you have to do this if you don’t want to. Any even if I didn’t tag you, feel free to still copy and paste these questions and fill it out yourself, and you can just say I tagged you.

#tag game

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worldaliasarts · 5 years

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Red Lips

Alister Kirkland x Momoka Honda

Part 1

TW: Blood and Cussing

Momoka brushed her hair a few times over before pinning a bright red flourish flower in her hair to match her blushed lips sighing gently.

Her father had promised another dinner to Oliver Kirkland, but failed to inform the family until that morning, with a pointed look towards his eldest daughter, Momoka. She had overheard their speaking of alliances and never understood why it would be of benefit to any one save for the fact her father figured she would not ever find love elsewise. He wasn't wrong. She wasn't looking. Besides it wasnt as if he or her mother entirely found love themselves...it felt nearly hypocritical, but she would do what was needed in order to please her father...even dining with a foolish boy..one with stupid pink hair on his stupid smiling face. She nearly hated him if she was being honest, he was always so carefree, unburdened by life...she was envious of it, as if it was a gift passed from the universe only to him, wholely unattainable for her.

She pursed her lips, adjusting her top to hide the ink on her skin, she figured Oliver would not take a liking to her many tattoos, in that case maybe she should show them off, in hopes to scare off the family and free her of them..maybe.

She left her shirt where it was, standing up.

Kusuru walked past her door pausing to look her over "you look nice, bachelorette"

"Oh shut your face, dumbass" she walked over kicking his calf, making him yell,

"Shitface!"

"Takes one to know one!" she furrowed her brows, shoving him out of the room, closing her door hard. Her cheeks burned with a mixture of anger and embarrassment as she brushed her hair back into its place with the tips of her fingers, ignoring her brother's taunting voice outside of her door.

The consideration of all that might be neccesary to rid herself of these people was now more inclined.

She listed all the things she knew the Kirklands hated in her mind,..cussing, blood, she figured tattoos as well, and excessive showing of skin..that one she admittedly disliked herself...her father would certainly strike her, until she had learned her lesson after dinner, but that would be worth it....

Wounds heal.

She refused to be pawned off to be the mother and home maker of some weak willed child, who wasted his days with knitting and baking and frilly western dressmaking, was he even a man??

Certainly not by her standards....

And if she was to be arranged in marriage, she at least wanted a man.

She stripped down to her lingerie running a finger lightly over her collarbone as she stared at herself in the mirror, she may be labeled as one who lives a debauched life, someone with loose morals, or no regard, but once she'd risen to power, and taken over the family mantle, any mistaken fool who thought that would be swiftly corrected.

She knelt in front of her dresser, and pulled open the drawer, gently pulling out each part of her kimono.

She put each layer on, loosely, allowing it to droop around her shoulders, making certain she looked indecent.

She pulled on her tabi socks, before she pulled the pretty hair pin out, setting it down carefully on her vanity. She stood walking across the room before kneeling once more, in front of a cabinet..she supposed now was as good a time as any to open it.

She pulled open the small wooden box, pulling out a small bottle of rice wine, gently cupping her hand, and pouring it lightly in, lathering it over her neck and some through her hair before she took a small swig, exhaling gently, returning the bottle to it's place and closing the doors.

She looked down at her palm,..perhaps this would be enough...perhaps drawing blood from herself might be crossing the line....

Her cheeks heated as she practiced in her mind acting like a loose lipped drunk, she wasnt entirely sure that she was capable...she supposed that she would have to be in order to pull this off.

Her thoughts were interrupted as a car pulled into the gravel drive. She glanced out the window as three people came out and approached her front door, she waited until they had been welcomed into the home before she made her way out of her window, climbing down to the ground, careful of her clothing, before giving her hair one last good toussle.

Kusuru answered the door, looking their guests up and down crossing his arms, biting the inside of his cheek as he stepped aside, watching them take their shoes off and step into his home.

Oliver Kirkland. Father to the child whom his sister was promised to, along with his wife, Aubree, who looked like she'd rather be literally anywhere else, than here with any of the people in this room, and of course the golden child himself, Alister Kirkland..his presence unsettled Kusuru, he didn't understand why, but he hated the tension in his nerves, and his unconcious flinching as he approached.

"やめて,(stop)" he growled slightly, glowering down at the pink haired boy

He laughed lightly "I hope you're doing alright Kusuru,.." he gave a gentle smile

"しね、ねずみ(die, rat)" he spat, his nose scrunching with distaste as he tried his best not to look unsettled. He was successful.

Alister blinked, smiling with another laugh "いお、ごめなさい(okay! I'm sorry.)" he bowed apologetically "I didn't mean to offend you Honda-San.."

Kusuru blinked, taken slightly aback, he hadn't expected to be understood.

"Please...make yourselves comfortable, I apologize for Kusuru's behaviour,..." His mother excused him gently, as she poured some tea for their guests, looking back at him from the corner of her eye.

Kusuru gave a huffing sigh, shifting and glancing away, he knew there would be words later, but did both of his parents honestly expect to marry his sister off to this freak? When she could break him with her pinky?? Their parents expected them both to just go along with it? No questions asked and no attempts to get out of it?...Though that was moreso his mode of operation than hers.

He glanced to the staircase. She must have gotten cold feet he guessed,...if she didnt have to be here, maybe he didn't either.

As if reading his thoughts, his father cleared his throat "Kusuru, retreive your sister.." he added a look to make sure he knew he'd better return, and he nodded, swallowing lightly before moving towards the stairs, rapping on her door "Momoka....everyones waiting for you, stupid.." he sighed.

Being greeted with silence, he furrowed his brows, and opened the door, his brows furrowing deeper into a frown "Momoka??" he looked around her empty room, walking over to the windowsil "Momoka..??" he called.

There was not even a trace of her.

He glanced over seeing her hair pin from earlier.

"Shit," he slammed a hand against the window frame, before he pinched his nose sighing, "Why do I have to cover for your selfish ass" he gritted his teeth, growling quietly, before he headed back downstairs.

"Where is your sister?" His father demanded.

"Not here.." he said giving a nonchalant look paired with a shrug he knew he'd regret.

Oliver gave a sympathetic smile in the Japanese man's direction, "Don't worry Kuro, we can come again another time.."

Kuro narrowed his eyes "...I plead you stay for dinner nontheless"

Alister nodded piping in "I think that's a wonderful idea,..! May we please, Mummy?" he asked looking to Oliver.

The older man smiled and nodded patting his son's head "Of course Poppet"

Kusuru furrowed his brows looking to Alister "What?"

He met his gaze, tilting his head innocently,

"Are you sick in the head or something??" Kusuru asked

"No...I don't believe so, why?" he asked, tilting his head some in the other direction.

He pointed to Oliver "You have to have hit your head extra hard then, because t h a t is n o t your mother, he has a dick-"

Oliver stood abruptly, placing his hands over Alister's ears, his eyes swirling just slightly "I'd rather we kept the conversation elsewhere..." he spoke quickly.

Before the black haired boy could continue, the door creaked open and a barefooted mess of a girl stumbled forward, tracking mud inside, giggling in a stupified manner before falling over against the wall, squealing lightly.

Kuro's eyes widen, along with the rest of his family's and their guests.

"Momoka Honda!" his voice cracked through the air, and her giggles, and she stumbled into a mostly upright position, placing a hand over her mouth, in order to look like she was stifling a laugh.

Alister's cheeks blazed red on her account as her kimono fell a little looser, falling off her shoulder completely. He rushed to her, pulling his hooded teal cloak from his shoulders, leaning up in order to drape them around hers, in an attempt at modesty for her.

"..Are you quite alright, love?" he asks, genuinely concerned about her, gently taking her free hand as a means of stability, to her surprise, causing her to blink, staring down at him, her cheeks warm at the physical contact. The words in her mind, her actions muddle.

She couldn't think.

Her brain paniked as she tries to process everything, her master plan had been easily thwarted and she was unsure how to proceed.

"..Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhit." she said the only word on her mind.

Oliver's eyes swirled faster, and he cleared his throat.

Alister's eyes flickered as well, as he continued to look up at her "Poppet,..-" he said, before glancing away and looking back at her "-Love, it's alright, you're home now,...you should go and get some rest now"

She took in a quiet, sharp, and shakey breath before she gave another loud giggle "You...you shhhould see your faces right now..!" she stumbled forward, leaning on Alister a little as she carried on in a sing songey manner "Shit shit shit shit shit shit sh-" a finger covered her mouth, and the grip on her hand was tightened, as Alister's smile twitched "Please don't speak anymore," he said with gentle cheer.

Momoka's eyes widened slightly, her mouth gaping some as her eyes drifted to her hand, that he was gripping, as she gave out a small cry of pain.

How did he have this tight of a hold on her?? her fingertips were changing colour, from the grip of this...twig??

Kusuru moved himself, suddenly standing between his sister and the strawberry blonde. "Back up,.." he growled.

The smaller boy blinked, letting her hand go, allowing her to stumble backward, holding her hand close to her chest underneath the cloak, as she fell against the wall with a quiet thud.

"I apologize, I must have zonked out for a moment there,.." he gave a gentle innocent laugh before looking at the slightly shook up Momoka "Love, are you alright,..?" he asked, once more, moving towards her only to have Kusuru side step and block him.

"You've done enough, she's fine without you, rat" kusuru hissed.

Momoka glanced away, looking at the door, she wasn't actually drunk,...her mind worked just fine...so why did she still feel like her thoughts were muddied, one gigantic crashing sound in her brain, "God..damn..." she exhaled, sucking in a breath as she felt her body being shoved against the wall, Alister's eyes hot pink, burning into her as he gripped her mouth, leaning up on his toes in order to whisper in her ear "If you do not stop speaking I will do so for you,...in the least cute way you can imagine.." Momoka furrowed her brows, anger boiling up in her as tears pricked her eyes, she shoved him off of herself "do n o t touch me, you vile small man" she ripped his cloak away from her neck, throwing it at him, about to shout once more before Kuro's voice is raised and he shouts "Enough!"

All three looked to him.

"All of you. I have seen e n o u g h." He points to Momoka "You have shamed myself and this family more than you can repay in this evening or any other..!"

Kuro kneeled into a deep and respectable bow, his wife following suit, beside him as he spoke to Oliver "I sincerely hope you may forgive my foolish children, and their many ailments"

Oliver gave him yet another sympathetic smile "...Its expected for things to be dicey with two..i understand, dont worry, old friend"

"Thank you..." He sighed, and slowly sat up "..If you will continue to endure us, we can start dinner, however I understand if it is not your preference.."

"You would know." Kusuru mumbled.

Oliver glanced to him arching a brow "Whatever do you mean?"

"...You would know how things get dicey, having two kids. You were just less fortunate with the seating arrangement" he gave Alister a look which was hard to decipher.

"....Perhaps.." a still feverish eyed Alister spoke "...But it has it's advantages." He returned the unreadable look.

Momoka looked between the two boys, her cheeks burned from where Alister's nails had dug in, and her hand still pulsated, she could feel a bruise building on her wrist...no doubt he could kill her,...if he wanted to. It was a thought she hated in itself, but it didn't change that fact.

She adjusted her clothing layers to be tighter around her body, while the attention was not on her, continuing to turn it over in her mind. Perhaps it wasn't actually a matter of alliance, it was a matter of her being his only option. Either way she was a pawn, but this new thought made her feel especially discardable. He shouldn't even be her problem.

Then again, was she ever really more than discardable to her father? He was a cold hearted man...he had made her cold hearted too,...though not so much that she was unable to consider the possible consequences to repeated offenses.

She wondered what Alister was capable of....what his father was capable of...perhaps her defiance would put her family in danger.... This was the thought she disliked the most.

She gently lowered to her knees, as well, gracefully stretching her arms out in a bow "...I....sincerely apologize" she started, everyones eyes turning to her. "It was uncooth of me to present myself in any style less than what is deserving in honour to you,..all...."

She remained there, her eyes trained on the floor as she waited.

Aubree was the first to speak "We all do stupid..." she paused clearing her throat "...stuff. Dont worry about it, honey"

she glanced up only slightly to look at the woman, before looking down once more "You are more than too kind.."

Aubree nudges Alister nodding towards Momoka, and he walked over, kneeling and taking her hand, the pink hue finally discipating, the bright blue returning, before he furrowed his brows "Love, why are you on the floor??" he pulled her up to her feet as he stood "Are you alright..?" he asks again, and she cant help but sigh, nodding "Yes...I am fine, I apologize,..."

She fought the urge to slid her hand out of his as she spoke again to ask "Might I go to my room..and refresh myself?"

Alister kept hold of her hand until they reached the staircase and she ascended, disappearing momentarily.

She sat in her room pouring jasmine scented oil along her scalp, combing through her hair in order to lesson the smell of sake.

She brushed a part of her hair back one more time, clipping in the red flowers, painting her lips again with red, before returning downstairs.

Alister looked her over with surprise, before a gentle smile formed "You look beautiful"

Her cheeks heated once more and she looked away "...you flatter me.." She felt so silly, feeling her heart beat rising once more over this man.

He shook his head "I mean what I say.."

Kusuru made a loud gagging noise in mockery of the two, wincing as Momoka socked him in the side.

"Bitch!" He yelled at her, shoving her before Kuro cleared his throat and Momoka coiled back from her almost retaliation.

"My apologies..." she said, folding her hands together, tightly, before she walked to the table, taking a seat.

Kusuru and Alister sat on either of her sides, causing her brow to twitch with irritation, though she remained silent.

The three of them remained silent for the duration of the night, apart from asking to pass condiments, allowing the adults, mostly the two men to talk between themselves, the whole dinner.

As the night came to a close the Kirklands departed, Alister placed a shy kiss on Momoka's cheek, much to her dismay before waving goodbye and heading out into the dark.

As soon as the car was gone, Kuro turned to his children "...Strip and wait for me outside." He commanded, as he headed to his study in order to get his bamboo sticks.

The two gave each other a look before doing as the were told, kneeling on the grass in nothing but their under garments.

Their father appeared beside them making as if to hit Momoka first, she tensed, but didn't feel the sting, rather she hears a small cry out of her brother's mouth, before he curls his mouth in, biting to keep himself silent.

"How dare you call our guests rats." His father struck him "At all, let alone to their faces." he struck him once more, his voice raising "and telling them to die!?" he hit him once more "I will make you w i s h you had only been speaking to yourself!" he continued to strike him, until he heard another pained noise out of his sons mouth, having drawn blood, he continued to beat him, for a while longer, creating streaks along his back, before he ceased, looking to Momoka "And you."

She tensed more preparing for her share of strikes "you shame our family, our name, and purposefully provoke your soon to be husband"

"...I would never marry that monster.." she whispered under her breath.

The man gave a dry laugh "do not speak as if you are above him. You too have spilled blood and harmed others...and done worse." he motioned to her brother "you did it just now."

She looked down, biting her tounge to keep from lashing back "...I am sorry, father."

"I'm not the one who needs to be apologized to."

She looked at him and looked away.

He handed her the bamboo "strike your brother"

"But father-"

"Strike him, or i will do so, ten fold on your behalf!" he shouted

She flinched slightly, and stood to her feet, sending a crack against her brothers back, making him dig his nails into the dirt.

"Again." Kuro commanded, and she did so. "Again." he repeated, and she looked at him, hesitatig, "please father, allow me to take my own punshiment..."

"You are taking your own punishment!" he shouted, pointing to her brother's bleeding back, he understood their closeness, even when they acted as if they hated one another. He knew how much this hurt her. "Strike him again!"

And so she obeyed, continuing for what felt like an eternity to both of them, before he allowed her to stop. She helped her brother to his feet, heading inside to clean her brother's wounds.

She is gentle when doing so, with little compensation. Though she hadn't pictured it exactly this way, the consequences were as she figured.

This would be the one and only night anyone suffered from her failure to consider consequences.

She bound up her brother's whole back in gauze, helping him to his room, putting him under the sheets, face first.

She sat on the floor in front of the bed "Im sorry Kusuru, I never meant..." she sighed "I never wanted you caught up in my issues"

"You're a piece of shit.." he growled lowly, tilting his body a little so he could look at her.

"Yes...I know" she frowned some at him.

"But you're still my sister, you dumbass, and I dont know what the hell is broken in that candy man's head, but I don't want him anywhere near you. He's a freak and he's gonna hurt you.. He already has hurt you."

Momoka looked at the carpet sighing "I can defend myself just fine, Kusuru. Besides...his father likely wouldn't be happy to hear that. In either case, if i can't defend myself I ought to get hurt... and if i can't defend myself from death...I ought to die." she stood, sighing "..but thanks for worrying.. it's nice to know you care" she gave him a light head pat.

"I still hate your guts though." he made sure she knew and she nodded "i do too." she mumbled and flicked off his bedroom light, going to her own room, flopping on the bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about the night..what a terrible terrible night.

With her mind refusing to relax, and the smell of sake and jasmine mixing in her hair, she gave up on all hopes of rest. Getting up, she headed off to the bathroom.

She sat on a stool, splashing water over her head a few times, before climbing into the bath tub, trying to do a better job of relaxing with the steam and gentle sway of the warm water helped.

She closed her eyes, remembering how the hairs on the back of her neck stood when Alister's eyes changed colour, she'd never seen anything like it,...even more frightening was his father, though he controlled himself much better.

She paused, recalling the words Aubree spoke just in her ear when departing, "I..wouldn't want to knowingly be married to that either,..." she had said.

Strangely enough, she may quickly become her only ally, understanding what it would be like to walk on thin ice within your own home all the time..

Was that going to be her future? Walking on eggshells, and building a family that was only hers to care for? Was it really t h a t silly of her to think if she ever did get married, her husband would tolerate her instead of love her? Even that would be better than a daily threat on her life...though he was sick enough in the head that maybe that was how he showed love.

She supposed Alister might learn to tolerate her...in a more normal manner. She had never been the focus of his anger like that...he seemed so...vulnerable.....until he was pushed.

She sunk further under the water, immersing herself fully, wanting to just stop thinking about everything, but she couldn't, it just continued, round and round in her head, and then she bobbed her head back up out of the water, panting, light and breathy.

She pulled herself up out of the water, reaching to grab a towel, pulling it over before pausing to glance behind, a jolt rushing through her body, as she hurried to pull the towel around herself "Alister, what the-" his hand was once more clasped onto her cheeks, as he reached over from the windowsill.

"No more unclean words this evening, Poppet"

She gripped his wrist, ripping it off her face, as she stepped backwards, climbing out of the bath "What do you want?" she growled to hide her fear. "Don't you have any sense of decency?"

"Decency?" he scoffed, traveling into the room with ease and grace, landing in front of her, getting close to her, running a hand over her back into the small of it, pulling her closer "You're one to speak with all that you tried to pull this evening.."

She backed up, gripping the side of the tub. He stepped closer, wrapping a hand around her waist a little more "Besides...everyone knows that you belong to me by now.." he spoke in a hushed tone, it sparked an angry flame in her chest, and her hair raised before she shoved him off "As if I would ever submit to anyone-any t h i n g" she corrected herself "like you." she glowered down at him, making the most of their height difference "you are small and insignificant, and no amount of anything you could do to me would change my mind."

He laughed "The look in your eye makes me wonder which one of us you're speaking to, Poppet.." he cupped her cheek "Don't act so big and mighty, 10 inches is not 10 feet," he said as his grip shifted to around her neck as he forced her to the ground "and even if it were, anyone can be brought down...haven't you ever heard of David and Goliath?"

She couldn't help but wince against the black marble floor as her knees hit it. She didn't dare to look up at him. She wished her mind and heart weren't warring against one another, she could neither be submissive nor dominant firmly with her internal conflict continuing. She hated it.

Nearly as much as she was beginning to hate this man.

He ran his fingers through her long wet hair before he wrapped it around his fist, pulling her up, towards his face, making her squeeze her eyes shut.

"Poppet...we can still make this work,..frankly you don't have much choice in the matter. Alister needs someone. And I chose you...seeing as no one else is remotely good enough.."

"...You're your own problem.." she gritted her teeth "If you weren't so broken and twisted perhaps Alister could actually find someone to care for him..." she spat, not looking at him.

He gave a dull laugh "I'm what stands between Alister and getting his heart crushed..what you call broken and twisted, I call protection.

"...You're crushing his heart yourself, deeming everyone less than good enough for him, hampering any chance of him finding genuine love." she said, her brows furrowed.

The man also furrowed his brows he nearly scoffed, but she continued speaking.

"It makes sense that Alister should get to decide himself...he's his own person" She sighed, looking up at him, "I'm not going to hurt him...I'm an Asshole not an idiot..."

While he hadn't appreciated the language, he understood, his grip loosened up enough for Momoka to pull her head away from his grip, though she felt a few strands tearing away from her head as she did so. She rubbed the spot, pulling herself to her feet.

"But that doesn't mean I could ever honestly love him either. I will do what I must, and see that he is cared for. Enough to protect my family. Nothing more."

"He will be your family soon enough too."

She sighed, scratching her eyebrow, he wasn't wrong, but she knew he was well aware of what she meant "Please leave my home."

He looked from the pieces of her hair between his fingers to her, "You weren't ever drunk were you..?" he asked quietly.

She didn't understand how his tone could change, how he felt bigger, more authoritative when he was like this..

Where she normally wouldn't feel the need to respond, he made her feel as though she didn't have a choice but to respond.

She shook her head lightly "...No."

He hummed, "Good." he stepped towards the door "Go and see him tomorrow,..properly." he commanded before he slipped out of the door, and out of the house through the front door, without so much as a creaking step.

Not even Momoka could do that, even with all her stealth training,...she continued to feel inferior to this man. And she continued to hate it.

She leaned back against the bathtub, sighing. As if she didnt already have far too much on her mind....

#Momoka Honda #Alister Kirkland #Hetalia OCs #2ptalia #love story #angst #slight blood warning #cussing too #2p!England #2p!Japan #Red Lips

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iwritesometimes · 5 years

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filigods replied to your post

“thank you to the gorgeous @wordssometimesfail for tagging me in a get...”

s o n g r e c s

so THANKS (much belatedly for tolerating my fucking out of control need to word vomit about music at literally all hours of the day and night; forcing others to listen to songs i like is literally one of the few joys that makes life worth living. also, idk if this was intended in a “hey cool, song recs” way or a “hey, yeah, link me those songs” way, but @filigods, BABY YOU’RE GETTIN THOSE LINKS and also more because i am insufferable.

below the cut: links to just Some Music What I Think Is Cool, organized...pretty dubiously, but an attempt will be made. also, now and at all times, anyone who feels so inclined should always link me to music they’re liking right now or that they loved in the past or that they think is just the bee’s knees...anytime. ANYTIME.

okay so the songs i mentioned the other day are all in here, but i wanted to organize it a bit more than just a random grab bag to give you some direction so that you know what you might be into, if you’ve never heard of some of these (my music taste isn’t all that niche but i’ve gone through a lot of phases in my life XD). particular “omg please listen to this before you die” faves will be in italics.

best of pop/pop rock

stuff by Keane, My Fave Band:

“Crystal Ball”

“Won’t Be Broken”

“Sovereign Light Cafe”

“Bedshaped”

“My Shadow”

stuff by Tokio Hotel, my first RPF subjects

“Übers Ende der Welt”

“Spring nicht”

“Wo sind eure Hände”

stuff by Elliot Minor, classically trained and sadly disbanded

“Parallel Worlds”

“The White One Is Evil”

“The Broken Minor”

“Solaris”

“Shiver”

“Electric High”

stuff by Dino Merlin, Bosnia’s Elton John

“Zid”

“Sarajevo”

“Majka Ruži Kćer”

“Heroes of Earth” by Wang Leehom (listen to more of his stuff - he’s insanely talented and has albums in several different genres)

“Sun Goes Down” by David Jordan

stuff by Gorillaz, you’ve definitely heard them but may not have heard these

“Stylo”

“November Has Come”

“Feel Good Inc.”

“Broken”

“Busted and Blue”

“Du erinnerst mich an Liebe” by Ich + Ich

stuff by Josh Groban, HE’S GOOD ADMIT IT TO YOURSELVES

“Never Let Go”

“Remember When it Rained”

“You Are Loved”

“Weeping”

“Tigerlily” by La Roux (whole album’s great, but this one’s gayyyy)

“Grace Kelly” and “Origin of Love” by Mika

“Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk” by Rufus Wainwright

“Make This Go On Forever” and “Set the Fire to the Third Bar” by Snow Patrol

stuff by Owl City, the fluffiest synthpop to ever make me happy

“Fireflies”

“Swimming in Miami”

“Meteor Shower”

“Strawberry Avalanche”

“Running Up That Hill” by Placebo covering Kate Bush

“Velvet Sky” by Los Lonely Boys

“Chasing the Sun” and “Satellite Call” and “Eden” by Sara Bareilles (WHOLE ALBUM!!!)

“Kiss Me” by Sixpence None the Richer

“Sad Clown” by Jars of Clay

stuff by Michael W. Smith, i can’t help i was raised on CCM please forgive me

“Cross of Gold”

“Lamu”

“Secret Ambition”

“Breathe in Me”

“Love Me Good”

“Faith My Eyes” and “High Countries” by Caedmon’s Call

stuff by Daft Punk, FUCKING SUPERB YOU FUNKY LITTLE ROBOTS (listen to all of Discovery and Random Access Memories!!)

“One More Time”

“Aerodynamic”

“Give Life Back to Music”

“Technologic”

“These Dreams” by Heart

“Even Rats” by The Slip

“To Build a Home” by The Cinematic Orchestra

“Mandolin Rain” and “The Way It Is” by Bruce Hornsby and the Range

“I’m Still Here” by John Rzeznik

“Ue o muite arukou” by Kyu Sakamoto

“Love Me Dead” by Ludo

“Just Communication” by Two-Mix (Soundcloud link because it’s not on YT?? however, this bitchin cover is!!)

“The Book of Love” by Peter Gabriel covering the Magnetic Fields

best of rock/rap rock

stuff by linkin park, baby’s first rock band (meteora and thousand suns, BEST albums)

“Forgotten”

“Somewhere I Belong”

“Breaking the Habit”

“Iridescent” (accidentally called this “The Radiance” in the op)

“The Messenger”

“Welcome Home” by Coheed and Cambria

“Televators” by The Mars Volta

“Isolation” and “Life Must Go On” by Alter Bridge

“Nemesis” by Arch Enemy

“Like a Stone” by Audioslave

“Lonely Boy” by The Black Keys

“In One Ear” and “Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked” by Cage the Elephant (whole album!!)

“Jordan” by Buckethead

“Paralyzer” by Finger Eleven

stuff by Gackt, j-rock boy of my dreams since 2003

“Mirror”

“Vanilla”

“Returner”

“Orenji no Taiyou” (with Hyde)

“Through the Night” by Masahiko Arimachi

“Magick” and “It’s Not Over Yet” by Klaxons

“Deliverance” and “In Mist She Was Standing” by Opeth

stuff by Panik, my good good german boys who just couldn’t make it work

“Revolution”

“Geht ab”

“Grau”

“Perfekt”

“Morgencafe”

“Bevor du gehst”

“Careless Whisper” by Seether covering Wham!

“Seasons” by The Veer Union

“Cold” by Static X

“Change (In the House of Flies)” by Deftones

“System” by Chester Bennington

“Whipping Boy” by Train

“Chevette” and “Some Kind of Zombie” by Audio Adrenaline

“Colossal” and “Witchcraft” by Wolfmother (whole album is great)

“Whiskey in the Jar” by Metallica and “Turn the Page” by Metallica covering Bob Seger

“Gravedigger” by Dave Matthews Band

“Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls

“Icky Thump” and “Blue Orchid” by The White Stripes

“Crazy Bitch” by Buckcherry

“You Shook Me All Night Long” and “Big Balls” by AC/DC (there is NO CORRECT VERSION of Big Balls on YT...sorry for the spotify link)

best of choral (most of which i’ve sung so i’m biased)/instrumental/soundtrack

Lux Aeterna and “O Magnum Mysterium” by Morten Lauridsen

The True Story of Cinderella (i was the queen in this :3)

Knock Knock and indeed anything by P.D.Q. Bach

“i thank You God for most this amazing day” and “Lux Aurumque” by Eric Whitacre

“Magnificat” by Arvo Pärt

“Set Me as a Seal” by René Clausen

“Cloudsong” and “The Heart’s Cry” by Anúna

“You Are the New Day” by The King’s Singers covering Airwaves, aka, the greatest love song of all time

“Castle in the Mist” and “You Were There” by Michiru Oshima (voc. Steven Geraghty)

“Prologue” and “The Farthest Land” by Ko Otani (the whole soundtrack is sublime, please listen to it!!!)

“The Mighty Rio Grande” and “They Move on Tracks of Never-Ending Light” by This Will Destroy You

“On the Nature of Daylight” by Max Richter (also, there’s a great mashup of this with “This Bitter Earth” by Dinah Washington)

“To Zanarkand” by Nobuo Uematsu (obviously, listen to everything the man ever wrote, but ofc my fave is the FFX OST)

“More Streets” by Zpiderflower

“I Was Born for This” by Austin Wintory (from the stellar Journey OST)

“The Ballad of Fiedler and Mundt” by Disparition

“Sex (Daedalus Remix)” by Slugabed

Castlevania malarkey

Best of “Bloody Tears”: official 1, official 2, official 3, fanmix 4

Best of “Vampire Killer”: official 1, official 2, fanmix 3

Best of “Simon’s Theme”: official 1, official 2, fanmix 3, fanmix 4

Super Castlevania IV (PLEASE listen to the whole thing but my faves): “Forest of Monsters”, “The Submerged City”, “Clockwork Mansion 2″, “The Library”, “Dracula Battle”, “Ending”

Castlevania: Symphony of the Night (ditto above): “Dance of Illusions”, “Dracula’s Castle”, “Marble Gallery”, “Lost Painting”, “Dance of Pales”, “Wandering Ghosts”, “Final Toccata”

“Clotho”, “Atropos”, and “Lathesis” from the Columns OST

Zelda shenanigans

“Title Theme (Wind Waker)”

“Dragon Roost Island”

“The Great Sea”

“Main Theme (Breath of the Wild)”

“Riding (Day)”

“Riding (Night)”

“Stables”

“Kakariko Village”

“Rito Village (Day)”

“Tarrey Town”

“Maze Forest”

“Hyrule Castle” and “Hyrule Castle Interior”

okay i gotta quit - i’ve had this tab open for like a week and a half now and i just keep adding stuff. this is enough to get anybody started. i hope y’all find something you like. :)

#filigods #music

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tveckling · 7 years

Text

Loke - Aldrig Mera Rädd Swedish and english translated lyrics after cut

Jag flydde som en fågel över gatorna en natt med käften full av blod och av saliv. Jag flydde som jag brukar som en råtta från en katt förödmjukad, förnedrad, för mitt liv. Natten fylldes utav våld och vansinniga skrik från de som jagade mig med stora tunga steg. ”Bättre fly än illa fäkta” skrek min tanke i panik medans mitt hjärta repeterade ordet feg.

Och med min harhjärtade fart så kom de efter ganska snart men genom skräcken skrek mitt hjärta som besatt: Att ”om du flyr på detta sätt så är det inte mer än rätt att det är dem som sätter villkoren inatt”

Och jag vet inte vad som hände vad som styrde mitt beslut för allt jag såg var vrede, våld och blod. Men i samma stund jag skulle lyckas undfly dem till slut så stanna jag i steget där jag stod.

På en sekund var de ikapp mig när jag långsamt vände om. De kom emot mig som en störtvåg som en storm. Och fastän natthimlen blev vit av deras vrede när de kom bar de alla sotsvart blick och uniform.

Och allt blev stilla en sekund och jag darra´ som en hund hjärtat sprängdes i mitt bröst vid varje slag. De kom emot mig i en ring och jag fatta´ ingenting men i den stund som mina ben gav vika hörde jag mig stå och skrika:

Jag- Jag är inte rädd. Jag är inte rädd. Nej, jag är inte rädd. För hur hårt ni än kan slå ska jag vara hårdare ändå och av det hat som kommer ifrån er får ni tillbaks fem gånger mer. Men jag- Jag är inte rädd. Jag är inte rädd. Nej, jag är inte rädd. För var och en av oss som dödas ska tusen nya födas för att stå här blodig bränd och svedd, tillintetgjord men aldrig mera rädd.

Jag ska vara allt ni hatar. Allt ni fruktar allra mest. Allt ni finner obehagligt, onormalt. Jag ska sprida mig i landet som en farsot som en pest och infektera erat samhälle totalt. Ja, för er ska jag va blatte, jugge, kosovoalban. För er är jag från Uzbekistan. Med hiphop-stylad burka med kroksabel, turban. Er ryska maffia och eran taliban.

Jag ska se det som en seger om ni ser mig som en neger. Hiv-bärande, Kat-tuggande svart. Jag snor cyklar, jobb och brudar. Jag är juden ibland judar. Jag är ZOG och jag finns överallt men ni vet inte vart.

Ni gissa rätt att jo, javisst. Visst fan är jag er kommunist. StaliLeniTrotskiMaoAnarkist. Perverterad satanist. Beväpnad djurrättsaktivist och mycket riktigt ska jag vara er kastreringsfeminist.

Jag är er samhällsparasit. Handikappad transvestit. Jag är hemlös och packad och hög. Rastafari och vegan könsopererad lesbian. Herregud jag ska så hjärtans gärna vara eran bög.

Ja, det är mig ni ska hata. Denna natt på denna gata. Bara kom! Jag är fienden av varje typ och slag. För om vanlig innebär att vara nåt av det ni är och dela era ideal då ska jag aldrig nånsin bli normal.

Men jag- Jag är inte rädd. Jag är inte rädd. Nej, jag är inte rädd. För hur hårt ni än kan slå ska jag vara hårdare ändå och av det hat som kommer ifrån er får ni tillbaks fem gånger mer. Men jag- Jag är inte rädd. Jag är inte rädd. Nej, jag är inte rädd. För var och en av oss som dödas ska tusen nya födas för att stå här blodig bränd och svedd, tillintetgjord men aldrig mera rädd.

Ni kan nog gissa hur det slutade, jag hade ingen chans det blev emo-ärr och tjugofyra stygn. Och en sirenskrikande färd i en hysterisk ambulans och en Salhgrenskavisit på fyra dygn.

Men jag minns knappt vad som hände, jag minns knappt att de slog eller att de stampa på det lilla som blev kvar. Jag minns bara jag låg blödande och värkande och log som en sol och som den segrare jag var.

Och med gatan mot mitt öra tyckte jag mig kunna höra själva stadens puls och djupa andetag. Sedan hörde jag en sång från varje port och trappuppgång. Ja, det var så marken börja gunga och jag hörde staden sjunga...

I flew like a bird over the streets one night with my mouth full of blood and of saliva. I fled like I usually do like a rat from a cat humiliated, disgraced, for my life. The night filled with violence and furious screams from those who hunted me with big heavy steps. “Better to flee than to fence poorly” my mind screamed in panic while my heart repeated the word coward.

And they soon fell behind, with my chicken-hearted speed but through the fear my heart screamed like possessed: That “if you flee in this way then it’s not more than fair that they are the ones dictating the terms tonight”

And I don’t know what happened, what controlled my decision because all I saw was rage, violence, and blood. But at the moment I would escape them at least I stopped in the middle of a step.

They reached me in a second while I slowly turned around. They came towards me like a floodgate, like a storm. And though the night sky became white by their rage when they arrived they were all dressed in soot-black looks and uniforms.

And everything froze for a moment and I shivered like a dog my heart exploded in my chest at every beat. They surrounded me in a ring and I didn’t understand anything but at the moment that my legs gave out I could hear myself stand and scream:

I- I’m not afraid. I’m not afraid. No, I’m not afraid. Because no matter how hard you hit I’m going to be tougher and from the hate you sow you’ll receive five times more. But I- I’m not afraid. I’m not afraid. No, I’m not afraid. For each and every one of us that is killed a thousand more will be born to stand here bloody, burned and scorched, destroyed, but never again scared.

I will be all you hate, everything you fear the most. Everything you find uncomfortable, unnatural. I will spread in the country like a plague, like a pestilence and completely infect your society. Yes, for you I’ll be a (derogatory terms for non-white, person from Yugoslavia, Kosovo-Albanian) For you I am from Uzbekistan. With hiphop-styled burqa, with scimitar, turban. Your Russian mob and your Taliban.

I will see it as a victory if you see me as a negro. HIV-carrying, KAT-chewing black. I steal bicycles, work, and chicks. I am the jew among jews. I am ZOG and I am everywhere but you don’t know where.

You guessed right that yeah, of course, I am your fucking communist. StaliLeniTrotskiMaoAnarchist. Perverted Satanist, armed animal rights activist and as you thought I will be your castration feminist.

I am your society parasite. Handicapped transvestite. I am homeless and drunk and high. Rastafarian and vegan genitalia operated lesbian. Oh my god I will so happily be your fag.

Yes, it is me you will hate. This night on this street. Just come! I am the enemy of any and every type. Because if normal means to be anything like what you are and share your ideals then I will never be normal

But I- I’m not afraid. I’m not afraid. No, I’m not afraid. Because no matter how hard you hit I’m going to be tougher and from the hate you sow you’ll receive five times more. But I- I’m not afraid. I’m not afraid. No, I’m not afraid. For each and every one of us that is killed a thousand more will be born to stand here bloody, burned and scorched, destroyed, but never again scared.

You can probably guess how it ended, I didn’t have a chance it was emo-scars and twenty-four stitches. And a siren screaming trip in a hysteric ambulance And a Sahlgrenska visit of four days.

But I barely remember what happened, I barely remember that they hit or that they stomped on what little remained. I just remember that I laid bleeding and aching and smiling like a sun and like the victor I was.

And with the street to my ear I thought I could hear The pulse and breathing of the city itself. Then I heard a song from every door and staircase. Yes, it was so that the ground started swinging and I could hear the city sing…

#me #translation #lyrics #loke nyberg #leah #it felt awkward translating certain specific parts #and then i admit i didn't try very hard to find the english words for the derogatory terms so i just wrote what they are

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