#letting my hair down

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him. #bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?'' #'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''

[ballpitwitch]

𝐊𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐮 𝐑𝐞𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐑𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐇𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐭𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐂𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐍𝐉 - 𝟏𝟎/𝟎𝟖/𝟐𝟑

#*tucks hair behind his ear* #Keanu Reeves #* #kreevesedit #flashing gif #keanuedit #yeah my boyfriend's in a band #THE DAY AFTER I MET AND SAW HIM #keke babe do you not get dizzy doing all that head bobbing #h a n d s #MAJESTIC #hi i love an old man #a hair tie claw clip barrette butterfly clip one of those big ones that looks like a flower #*runs hand down his forearm like it's a staircase bannister* #......it's been a long week......i apologize #people who don't like gray hair are weak #i will give you 43 cents and a cookie if you let me play with your hair #...that was already a tag #but the offer still stands #i'll even throw in a $2 bill i work at a bank i can get some #are backpacks you wear in the front a thing? because i would like to be one #v e i n s #can't believe he's really been here and hot my whole life #that is a long™ torso #more room to wrap around #hands so big they could hold two ankles at once #omg who said that

[cherrirui-official]

I hope u guys don't mind me posting these au doodles while I work on things ahaha

I also gave JD slightly longer hair in these doodles as a funny haha but I don't think it's funny anymore he looks genuinely good with his hair like that ahahaha I hope you're not mad at me for changing his au design a bit

#first of all ahem DONT TAG THIS AS SHIP OR WHATEVER!!! ILL THROW ROCKS AT YOU!!!!! BITCH!!!!!!! #troIlcest (or whatever you call yourselves idk) DONT TOUCH my SHIT! Ty :] anyways... #For context I like to hc that when he was younger Bruce would always have JD brush his hair #and like... whenever lil Bruce was upset it would help calm him down i think ahhauysgjiodk do u guys see the vision?? #and since it's my au i can make reality whatever i want it to be sooooo :] #I like to imagine that it still helps Bruce calm down even tho they're older now.. Big bro brushing his lil bros hair to soothe him UUGH #Let JD be a good older brother pleeease #also gave JD flowers in his hair too bc he deserves them me thinks... Now him and Bruce are matching!!! #i dont have any specific flowers in mind for the ones in their hair i just picked a color for the flowers that looked pretty and ran with i #also saying it again i love love LOOOOVE the crayon tool in mspaint using it to make gradients is so!!!! UUUGHUHHH!!!! /pos #the pattern on JD's jacket fur will never be consistent shhhhh #trolls #trolls band together #john dory trolls #trolls john dory #bruce trolls #trolls bruce #beach bros au #cherris canvas #I made that last image btw #everytime i saw that screenshot of jd it made me think of the spongebob scene where its a pov of flats waking up #and the first thing he sees is spongebob waiting for him with flowers in his hand and smiling

[elliesself]

I love the symbolism of ‘letting your hair down’. It’s so simple, so beautiful and picturing it gives me so much relief. Like the release of all that stress that you didn’t realise was so bad until it went away and going from so uptight and constantly high strung to finally feeling good again and going from so sternly mature to girlish again and ughhh it’s just so good and I’m a little too obsessed

#symbolism #letting my hair down

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

Danny was being harassed in broad daylight.

He can’t get the guy to take a hint and frankly he’s going to be late for his new job if he can’t get through the door.

Just when he was starting to think that he would have to hit him, a hand gently rested on his shoulder.

“Hey Chum sorry it took me so long to get here but traffic was a killer! Is this man bothering you?”

Turns out His boss Bruce Wayne is actually a nice man.

Too bad Gotham gossips worst than a small town.

Seriously guys, this isn’t funny, it stopped being funny the third time he got picked out of a crowd as the “new Wayne.”

#dp x dc #writing prompt #danny fenton #dc x dp #bruce wayne #bruce: let me get this kid out of a tough spot #bruce: why are my kids grumpy at me? #Bruce: what do you mean *new son* #Danny jokenly: thanks dad #everyone in the tower: Write that down. WRITE THAT DOWN! #Bruce is gripping his self restraint mentally every time this new hire is in his eyesight #his kids would have a field day if he adopted a new recruit with black hair and blue eyes #when your fake dad accidentally becomes your real dad through osmosis #writting prompt

[the-nothing-maker]

When will gods let you rest

#the legend of zelda #tears of the kingdom #totk #ganondorf #my art #i said i'd draw ganon with his hair down and i am not the kind of guy who backs away from a promise #ANYWAY i am begging BEGGING begging totk to FINALLY let us be allies with ganon #PLEASE please please #own up to your entire 'what if we were more than our destinies' themes in botw !! #reunite the triforce ! destroy demise once and for all ! i am crying shaking i am BEGGING #this would be so good......

[nezhanetwork]

sorry for my absence, i have been busy ethoslabbing. his hair is my favourite thing about his design, and i like the idea of it changing throughout the season(s), yk

#life series #last life #double life #← i had these two in mind while drawing #like if ll!etho let his hair down on his red life #or if he cut his hair short in double life cus bdubs loved it long. anyway #ethoslab #ethoslab fanart #my art

[medicalunprofessional]

wunderbar !

#nightmaretheater #sasha nein #psychonauts #Sorry i just really like drawing distressed sasha #This art is directed at me. It tells a story only i know #sometjing skmetjing younger sasha bejng stressed and a complete foreigner being askedsooo many wuestiosn Wahhh #….Was fun to play with restricted colors to :) love restricting my colors #to the one person (me) who knows what this is refferencing ; #Yes there was gonna be a 4th image but i ddint do ti Giggle #The color choice and shapes are intentional. By the way. Walks off #anyways *stretches* Back to the art caves #…his hair is kind of annoying 2 draw sometimes. giggle #Lso my art style changed mid drawinf bc i took a break from it Lol #also i will not stand down let a woman have veiny hands #rRHRHFHGJJJggahdhfhhGgsh chews up the walls of my room #11 hours on canvas + prolly more btw #started this like a week or so ago Giggles

[crushpomegranates]

goth shart!!!

#never let me make up a fit again #the design is atrocious #me when i refuse to use references #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #shadowheart bg3 #shadowheart fanart #shadowheart #bg3 fanart #art #modern au??? perhaps. #just wanted an excuse to draw her with her hair down Tbh. #MY WATERMARK IS BACKWARDS #ignorw that.

[lottiemilfews]

camina drummer in the expanse 5x03 - mother

#LOOSE HAIR DRUMMER! IM EXPERIENCING AN EMERGENCY #the expanse #theexpanseedit #scifiedit #wlwedit #tvedit #expanseblog #pocfiction #femalecharacters #camina drummer #cara gee #my post #*m.gif #what do i DO im not okay. #i FORGOT she ever lets her hair down and i was. unprepared. #using my newly acquired power for gay #mother indeed.

[turtleblogatlast]

I still think about how Leo’s ideal day out for the fam’s venture into the Hidden City was basically just an effort to get some rest and relaxation because boy does he never get that ever.

#rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #Leo is that one kid who’s like yeah dude I’m chill I’m laidback #and on the inside he’s just in a constant fetal position rocking back and forth #at least the others got a good amount of time spent in Tahiti but Leo’s out here like please god just one spa day 🙏🙏🙏 #no but tbh? it’s genuinely a great look at Leo’s character that he wants to go to a spa to basically just sleep in the sun #it’s not bombastic or flashy or anything he legit just wants a good place to get proper rest and care #that hair spa can catch these hands LET MY BOY HAVE HIS SPA DAY 🔪 #HONESTLY EACH PERSON’S CHOICE OF WHERE THEY WENT FOR THEIR DAY OUT SAYS A LOT #like raph wants to emulate who he perceives as those in justice in a desire to become more like the hero he so desperately wants to be #leo goes off on his own in order to let his guard down and actually rest for more than a lackadaisical facade #donnie goes with april not only to salvage his pride and condemn magic but also to hold onto his self worth and genuinely help out #and mikey thrives in family and specifically the harmony within family and how that is portrayed through the act of simply being together #in this essay I will-

[hamlet-not-hamnet]

some exr for the soul but make it aristocats

#my hc is that r is actually taller than e but bc hes always sitting in the corner and leaves after everybody else nobody knows #another hc is that its the ultimate sign of trust if e lets his hair down around you #also me doing rendering? who would have thought #les mis #enjoltaire #exr #les miserables #enjolras #grantaire #my art

[scribblesscribblings]

His ghost back be hurting from carrying the entire evening

#ghost trick #sissel #lynne ghost trick #my art #remind me never to draw this mans with his hair down again #I hit him with the prettyboy beam the second I did it #I can’t let this keep happening

[panisestgladio]

Oh Kaeya, Kaeya! Let down your hair!

#I wish he let down his hair more #kaeya #kaeya alberich #kaeya (genshin impact) #kaeya genshin #Lumine #lumine (genshin impact) #kaeya ragnvindr #Abyss prince #my art #genshin impact #doodles #art

[k4pp4-8]

I love their lil pajamas :)))

#enid with her hair down is just so AUURUGHH #my girlfrien d.... #i love drawing em together they have the cutest friendship that has ever existed #my sillies.... #ok ko fanart #ok ko let's be heroes #ok k.o.! let's be heroes #ko kincaid #radicles x #enid mettle #ok ko ko #ok ko rad #ok ko enid #my art #kappart

[lilyshear]

i’m sorry i can never draw him with his little braid

#ffxiv #ffxiv art #g'raha tia #my art #ive reworked this drawing like 3 times since finishing 5.3 and it never gets any cleaner LMAOOO #o well i just wish he'd gotten to let his hair down!!! it would have been cute tf