#just in the worst possible way)

[fishfingersandscarves]

ketheric thorm

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #ketheric thorm #poor guy just wants his daughter back but does it in the worst way possible

[humming-fly]

I know I've thought of a good shitpost when the premise is only funny to me and maybe three other people

#i bet you all thought i'd do an fma crossover first huh? Foolish. kirby shitpost attack #malevolent #malevolent podcast #arthur lester #john doe #comic #my art #doodles #kirby #not shown is john describing a waddle dee to arthur in the worst way possible #'oh arthur....' #'it's a small orange creature - unlike anything from your world' #'it stands maybe one foot high and moves with an odd gait - its limbs sliding across its body as if disconnected' #'fleshy protrusions on both of its sides sway with it...almost like limbs that have been amputated - leaving just the stumps' #'oh god arthur...its face...' #'two long wet eyes sit in the center of its body - they're drawn and pulled in an uneven shape' #'it's pupils fill the bottom two thirds of each long oval' #'the rest of the face or head is featureless and smooth - it has no mouth only tan stretched skin that looks pliant to the touch' #'arthur...it's Staring Right. At. Us.' #waddle dee: wanya

[little-pondhead]

I have a simple fascination and joy in the thought that, for the Ghost King AU, most of the time Danny is literally so normal compared to other ghosts.

Like, he’s a kid. He looks like a kid. Going by canon appearances, he is the most human looking ghost we see (aside from Ellie). Even Plasmius is more inhuman, which is where all the vampire jokes come from. Every single one of this enemies is off even in a human disguise. They’re not human, and people don’t expect them to be.

So aside from the implications of Danny looking like a child ghost, I wonder what other characters would think if they summon the Ghost King, expecting this huge monstrosity worse than anything they’ve ever seen, and getting a totally normal human-looking kid.

I’d be terrified. Because if horror movies have taught us anything, it’s that the most innocent and normal looking people are the worst monsters you’ve ever seen.

Like, what is he hiding??

#danny phantom #pondhead rambles #just a thought #if I tried summoning the ghost king I’d be ready to face an eldritch god not a teenager #and let’s just imagine he’s doesn’t have a creepy form at all #literally just looks the same as canon all the time #if a kid showed up in place of a monster? hell no #I’m outta there #something is wrong and I’m not dealing with it #Danny doesn’t set off the uncanny valley feeling at all but because people THINK that the feeling should be there #the lack of it is making people’s nerves worse #no ‘oh shit we fucked up why is there a kid he can’t possibly be the ghost king’ #more like ‘oh shit we fucked up what kind of ghost king looks like a human teen we are way out of our depths’ #these thoughts come from me playing video games and immediately being on guard when a lone child is in a place they should not be #like I’m ready to fight monsters and bad guys #children? fuck that they’re obviously going to kill me in the worst way possible

[jackdaw-and-hattrick]

Dying at this idea I just had: People become convinced Danny is the love child of Bruce Wayne (known manwhore) and Harley Quinn, because

-he looks just like a young Bruce, if (somehow) marginally paler, but with Harley’s button nose and big eyes.

-Then there’s his big, Harleyesque personality with Bruce’s faith in humanity and both’s proclivity for taking action against what they see as wrong.

-He’s a gymnastics champion like Harley with real intelligence buried deep under layers of plain silliness, though much more capable sobering up when situationally appropriate.

-Dangerous big animals love them and they have no answers why

-Both Danny and Bruce have BDE (Big Dad Energy)

-(also both Danny and Harley are high key metas but everyone just doesn’t mention that)

Both Harley and Danny do everything in their power to feed the rumors (without saying anything directly, that would be cheating), including Harley egging Bruce on camera while shouting “pay up bitch!” And Danny taking up wearing one of Harley’s jackets.

#danny phantom #dp x dc #batman #bruce wayne #harley quinzel #dc x dp #the bat kids love it (after doing a dna check) #and end up feeding the whole situation right along with them #at least as long as B doesn’t go and ACTUALLY make this kid his son #(this could be extra fun if it turns out Danny actually IS Bruce and Harley’s son #given his parents shaky morals and exceptional science #who’s to say they didn’t attend the same university as both B and Harls #and decided rather than go through the process of pregnancy all over again they just #pick their favorite class mates #maybe for some traits they want to see in their kid #maybe for funsies #and so this random rumor turns out to be 1000% true #just in the worst possible way)

[army-of-bee-assassins]

it's been said before and i'll say it again: image descriptions are not meant to be added later by other people. they are meant to be written by op and included within the op.

#when people add descriptions in a reblog - that's just a stopgap measure #it's not the goal to do it that way forever #the goal is for as many people as possible to write their own image descriptions #accessibility #glad we're all feeling angry about ids today together #accessibility has to be promoted by everyone - not just a tiny minority #this is also why we are constantly asking people to edit ids into the original post #if you rb my id to say thanks i assume you're unintentionally ignorant at best (i am hoping you will read my blog description) #and at worst i assume you know and you are just too ableist to edit the id in #(sorry i keep editing the tags i just keep thinking of more things i wanna say)

[direquail]

One of the many things I find funny and irritating is the slant of a lot of interpretations of Alecto's name (that it's about feminine rage)--on this here wlw internet in the year of our lord 2024, it's easily made to figure as rage against God, or rage against patriarchy, or religious oppression, and therefore an allusion to the idea that she's going to get her vengeance on John for betraying and oppressing her somehow, but like

John is the one who named her Alecto. He's the one who named her that. So, naming her "Alecto" is alluding to the embodiment of John's rage--their rage, since they are joined inseparably (John even explicitly says that when he first perceives her: "You wouldn't stop screaming. You were so scared. You were so goddamn mad").

He says of Alecto to Harrow, "In a very real way, you are [Alecto's] children". At a very surface level, Alecto is (depending on the text or tradition), one of the Furies--famously, in several surviving Greek tragedies, who punish Orestes for the crime of killing his mother. In fact, in Aeschylus' Oresteia, they declare that they are specifically bound to avenge matricide.

So the name "Alecto" alludes to the nature of John's mission and how he sees it.

It also implies that his divine rage, the rage that gives him power, the power that makes him divine, that he either represents or wants to represent, is feminine rage. He was chosen by Earth (which, Furies are sometimes the daughters of Gaia); he is her champion, however he's managed to fuck that up. Once the truth of that comes out, it becomes clear that all of his power comes from her.

And that's why you get statements from Tamsyn Muir like:

“[T]he God of the Locked Tomb IS a man; he IS the Father and the Teacher; it’s an inherently masc role played by someone who has an uneasy relationship himself to playing a Biblical patriarch. John falls back on hierarchies and roles because they’re familiar even when he’s struggling not to. Even he identifies himself as the God who became man and the man who became God. But the divine in the Locked Tomb is essentially feminine on multiple axes – I think Nona will illuminate that a little bit more."

So yes, he plays the role of Emperor and God and Teacher, with all of the things that implies. And I don't think it should be discounted. But he also is (and partly sees himself as) the chosen champion of a goddess, or what is for all intents & purposes for a human like him a goddess. He is her avenger, and while she sleeps, her avatar.

And I don't think we're meant to read him purely as a parasite who's taking advantage of her to gain power for himself, either. Or an oppressive, Kronos-like figure. Especially if you consider Palamedes' theory of the Grand Lysis, even if he was purely motivated by desire for power before (which I really doubt), there are parts of each in the other, now. What was clear and separate before is uncertain and interpenetrated. Is his rage his own, or hers? Is his mission of revenge his, or hers? If he wants power, is that his own selfishness, or her desire to survive?

And does it matter?

#the locked tomb #tlt meta #john gaius #i really wish there wasn't such an intense desire to find the worst possible interpretations of johns' actions #because like. they're plenty hurtful on their own! they're plenty shitty! #there IS however something tamsyn muir is trying to express through the series and it's fairly complicated-otherwise it wouldn't be a serie #and i don't think it actually helps us to turn john into a cardboard cutout labeled 'evil' #or apply tropes we've marinated in from radfem-informed segments of online wlw culture about how men are parasites on the Divine Feminine #or apply the messages of other shows with a big emphasis on queer and wlw themes--like spop--to something that just fundamentally isn't the #there is more than one way to talk about lesbian religious trauma and there is more than one narrative around it #and more than one perspective on it #i wish that people would try harder to experience the story on its own terms

[teehee-vibes]

Finally started listening to Riptide, new hyperfixation just dropped

#jrwi riptide #just roll with it #chip jrwi #jay ferin #gillion tidestrider #tv’s art #I’m kidding btw the buzz isn’t the worst thing in the world lmao #I’m only on episode 33 #what the hell is chip’s deal btw guys #why is he the way that he is #adore him tho #OUGH also Jay has me positively captivated #she is so cool like oh my god #the family issues we keep getting snippets of and the way she defeated the empress… she’s so great #gillion is one of the sillies ever though I’m afraid #he itches the brain in every possible way #I literally adore them. the ultimate trio. #cannot wait to encounter The Horrors

[duckiemimi]

i hate myself so much rn.

#i’ve been frothing at the mouth about how i had hope gojo would live #and he’d be living proof that change is possible and fate is breakable #what the actual fuck #i mean he’s passed the baton to his allies ig #his students #but it just feels unfinished #this is so surreal and in the worst way #jjk #gojo satoru #jjk 236 #mimi u have to keep ur thoughts to urself sometimes #jjk leaks #jujutsu kaisen

[copepods]

more of this au... i kind of like it actually

[id: sketches of dsmp!wilbur and qsmp!wilbur in a comic. q!wilbur is sitting in a chair, watching tallulah sleep. behind him, leaning against the wall, his dsmp self says, “i tried, you know. changing things. making my world ‘better.’ you want to know how that worked out?” and he replies “not particularly.” dsmp!wilbur approaches him, and says “hey, i won’t stop you. you can play at peace for as long as you like. maybe some of those friends of yours will even join you.” he leans close to wilbur’s face, smiling, and says “but sooner or later... something’s got to give.” end id]

#some stuff about how this au works... basically dsmp q and wilbur end up in qsmp invisible to everyone but their alternate selves. they're- #-from pre finale; like at their worst possible selves when they're both obsessed with vengeance and each other #they dont know why they ended up in qsmp; quackity thinks he was sent to help his other self become 'stronger'. the same way he tried to- #-mentor charlie #wilbur doesnt really know why hes there. he just decides to sit back and watch the show #qsmp #dsmp #dream smp #art #fish makes art #wilbur soot

[baeshijima]

it's you

despite everything,

it's still you

#how long have i looped cure for u may ask? yes. #in despair how will i ever function from now on #there are so many thoughts... so many feelings... so many tears... oh ivantill... #cries i want their standees so bad... i want to put them on my shelf and act like everything is ok and well and dandy ;w;; #will i break and cave for chara x chara just to give them a happy ending? who knows.... im so tempted... #also listening to their ver. of my clematis again hit different and in the worst way possible :'D #ivantill #alien stage #alien stage round 6 #alnst #alnst round 6 #alnst ivan #alnst till #ivan #till

[caindiis]

nothing more devastating than coming back to the tag of your fav and seeing the most recent post is still your own

#obey me #obey me shall we date #swd obey me #my art #obey me mephistopheles #obey me mephisto #this is as far as i’m taking this little doodle :3 so cutttessss #i want him carnally. biblically. romantically. in every way possible and especially the worst oens #ones*…. it’s so embarrassing making typos in the tags when ur too lazy to go back and retype it #fully aware it’s missing some details i just wanted this OUUUTTT because my adhd was starting to make me deteriorate and . #well let’s just say that if that happened this version would never see the light of day

[loveoaths]

the best time travel fic trope is “guy who knows nothing goes back in time and somehow fixes everything.” no more darth vader traveling back to the republic era to change things. just drop din djarin in the temple so he can point a gun at yoda and say “the Push or whatever sent me, a wizard named luke skywalker, and your grandson here to kill a guy named sith. sith if you’re here please raise your hand” and the whole order explodes because did you say luke fucking skywalker

#it’s just so funny to put objectively the least knowledgeable guy in the entire SW canon and charge him with changing everything #which he does but in the worst messiest dumbest way possible #walkie talkie. #the Mandalorian #din djarin

[neon-impressions]

I AM SOFT AND KIND AND FULL OF LOVE

#everything everywhere all at once #eeaao #movie lists #movie sessions #this movie gave me so much to think about #nilhism and existentialism will always get to you #and maybe you'll never be the utmost potential of what you could be #maybe you are living the worst possible life possible and all the choices you've made are wrong but the only way out is through #the fact that killing yourself is not the answer and figuring out to be happy woth what you have and where you are is such a cute message #also thinking about how family members always go through so much and there's generations of built up trauma #but you still can find comfort with them #a universe where nothing matters is so liberating #just gotta be kind #michelle yeoh #ke huy quan #stephanie hsu #jamie lee curtis #daniel kwan #daniel scheinert #a24 #this movie is basically jester's privilege #also my ramblings make no sense but at least ik how to walk my path better now

[mags-writes]

me, 14 and reading the end of mockingjay:

me, 24 and reading the end of the ballad of songbirds and snakes:

#the hunger games #the hunger games: mockingjay #mockingjay #the hunger games: the ballad of songbirds and snakes #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #suzzane collins #no amount of poverty or tragedy could possibly make coriolanus snow into a decent person #i went into the book knowing that it would make him out to be sympathetic and then he would just be The Worst™ #but he really really really REALLY is just The Fucking Worst™ #spoiler! the man just up and stole his friends parents! the friend that he got KILLED! #also the way that she was always referred to at lucy gray/lucy gray baird was very telling #he never called her lucy. just lucy. it was always lucy gray #even in their last scene together he was calling out for lucy gray not lucy #idk something something he doesnt see her as herself he sees her as an idea a tribute on a pedestal she has to think the same way as him #and when she doesnt he gets angry she has to love him only and when she admits to having a lover before him he gets angry #he gets angry and she has to apologise he gets angry and its always her fault she's the backwards thinker and he's far above her #idk his superiority complex was so intriguing especially since i think lucy was playing him and the capital like a fucking fiddle #nearly everything she said was too perfect for her to actually think like that #and when she said something wrong she would sooth him over #both manipulators in their own way and for completely different reasons #his was for superiority and her's was for survival

[skyloftian-nutcase]

TotK DLC idea!

The screen is black. You don’t hear anything for a long time. Then, faintly, in the distance, you can hear it.

Link. Link. Open your eyes.

While the line echoes familiarity, the voice does not.

Or. Well. It does. Because while it isn’t Zelda, it’s a familiar man’s voice speaking gently, so gently you almost don’t recognize it because there’s no way he ever spoke like this in the main game.

But he is now. And instead of a golden light being the first image you see before the screen shows Link awakening… you see gloom floating in the air. The image cuts to a Hylian waking up who… doesn’t look like Link from TotK?? He’s different, still small in stature, with slightly tanner skin, platinum light blonde hair, and red eyes. But… something’s wrong with his forehead. There’s a weird line on it.

This new character you apparently are gonna be playing in the DLC blearily blinks his eyes open, clearly groggy and too weak to really move. But then that line on his forehead moves a hair, it splits apart, and you realize it’s a freaking eye, red and yellow and it’s like the ones on gloom hands and oh gosh what the hell is it doing on his forehead—

Link realizes something is off and his eyes blow wide, his hands reach for his forehead and he screams in agony and terror, only for someone to scoop him into a hug to soothe him.

And suddenly you realize why that voice was eerily familiar.

It’s Ganondorf. He resurrected you from the era of the Imprisoning War. You, who have a history with him and his family. You, who he wants to protect, who he views as his kid, who he calls a prince and says he’ll keep you safe by controlling your body with his dark magic if he has to.

Welcome to Tears of the Kingdom: Hero’s Shadow.

You have to play a long gone Hero who was resurrected. Ganondorf, who is still recovering his strength in preparation for killing the current Hero, tasks you with finding your betrothed, his daughter, as well as his wife. They’re buried somewhere in the Depths like you were. He wants you to find their burial sites so he can use his secret stone to resurrect them like he did you, and control them as well. Which is doubly bad when you realize his wife was the original Sage of Lightning. He gives you free reign to wander once you go through a tutorial (he tests you to see if you’ve recovered enough strength), because he knows you love wandering and collecting things. Your own personal objective, however, is trying to help Hyrule from the Depths, to break free from Ganondorf’s control, because Link would rather set himself on fire than let Ganondorf resurrect and control the love of his life and his mother-in-law. Your best hope is to find shards of the shattered Master Sword to try and stab the eye on Dark Link’s forehead and break the control Ganondorf has on you. Until you can, though, the monsters are your allies, you can teleport across the Depths by manifesting out of the gloom created by gloom hands (just like what Phantom Ganon does), and the world below is your oyster. If you get too close to sword shards when gloom hands are nearby, Ganondorf can see your attempt and immediately takes control of your body, and no matter what button you press Link just walks back to Ganondorf’s location and stays there until you get a chance to try again.

You start with three hearts, all empty looking like when gloom hurts you, and if you get injured they just shatter. Whenever they all shatter, you respawn at Ganondorf’s location because his gloom hands came and rescued you from dying. The only way you can get more hearts is by collecting poes and offering them to the statues in the Depths. You can communicate with the spirits of soldiers, who may give you combat tips or info about the area. If you gain enough of Ganondorf’s trust, he’ll let you command monsters, and he might even let you wander the Surface (under his supervision) during a blood moon.

You learn of Link’s and Ganondorf’s history through discovering ancient relics/texts that trigger memories. This connection between you and Ganondorf stems back to time before the war, well over ten thousand years ago. Link was engaged to Ganondorf’s daughter, but during the Imprisoning War the family fought against the demon king. Ganondorf did love his family, but he loved power more. Link sacrificed himself, letting himself get mortally wounded to save Rauru from a killing blow. Gan held him as he died, and it allowed Link to both beg him to stop and stab him in the heart with a light shard. The shard didn’t kill him, but it was what Rauru connected with when he hit him in the chest, allowing him to seal Ganondorf away. Ganondorf still wants the world, but his love for his family is still present, though now twisted, so he thinks he can control Link and everyone else with his dark magic in order to keep them safe and in line. Once the threat of the current Hero is eliminated, the world will be his, and his family will be safe. As such, he treats you, Link, the player, like a stubborn child, reeling you in, but does so in a horrific way, torturing Link by controlling him.

You have to break free of this and stop him, and the only hope you have is the distant call of a sword spirit…

#tears of the kingdom #totk #I think it would be pretty neat to play someone who is “allies” with the bad guy #but you still have the objective of stopping evil #But you have to manipulate Ganondorf and work around his watch #So you get to play double agent #And possibly see a more complex Ganondorf #Like the dude is still being evil; he’s using his love for Link as an excuse to control him #He does care about him but he’s expressing it in the worst way #and he wants to do the same to his wife and daughter #So still a bad guy but a far more interesting one #One day you’re on the Surface with him and you see the Light Dragon and you’re not sure who it is #Because Link died before Zelda ate the secret stone #But Link can kind of guess #And Ganondorf almost noticed her so Link has to hug him or say something to get his attention #You have to manipulate Gan as best you can #idk how it would end #Like once you break free what do you do #But the idea tickled my mind so I wanted to write it down #Yes I’m just playing with my Imprisoning War blorbos #no I don’t care #legend of zelda #skye time travels through the queue #hero of shadow

[57sfinest]

calling harry a “can opener” was SUCH a good play for so many reasons i think about it every day.

in the context of his work, it makes him a tool. as many people have pointed out, including martin luiga, part of the hdb tragedy is that he simply cannot leave the force, and his superiors know that and are using it to their advantage. no matter what happens, even if harry hated every nanosecond of every bit of the work and wanted to leave, he can’t and won’t leave. they can leverage anything they want against him and then reel him back in with a facade of kindness when they “allow” him to keep his job, as long as he does what they want him to. the 41st knows he has this inexplicable talent with people and they use him for it. he’s a cop: that talent can be used in so many awful ways, to push so many different agendas. and they won’t even be his own. a can opener has no particular desire to open a can, aside from maybe the satisfaction of fulfilling a purpose. a can opener has no agency, it’s just a tool for someone else to use to get what they want. and he’s learned to be okay with being used as long as it means he gets to stay. his complacency with this system makes him guilty even if he’s also being harmed by it.

but in the context of his personal life you kind of... flip it. the people around him are going to be opened up whether they want to be or not, and it’s terrible for his relationships. it’s shown that the questions, the prying- the can-opening- it’s become inextricable from who he is as a person. it’s like he doesn’t know how else to communicate, except it’s hardly communication when you’re just ripping people open. he’s invasive as all hell, although whether he means to be is debatable. he’s the kind of person that wants to take things apart to see what makes them tick. he dissects people, but really that’s too delicate of a word for what he does; if he doesn’t get what he wants right up front, he’ll abandon all subtlety and go for brute force. if he can’t get your screws loose he’ll just smash you on the ground and pick through your pieces until he’s satisfied, and if what he did to you isn’t fixable? oh well, there are other cans to open. 

and he’ll use it for personal gain: we already know he is (was?) manipulative. once he knows how you operate, he knows how to make you keep him. he can yell or he can cry; he can threaten you or he can threaten himself; he can be completely suffocating or he can withdraw completely; he can be an incorrigible liar or brutally honest; he can present himself as a threat or a joke or a talent. he’s a chimera- that’s why he’s got this inexplicable magnetism, even when people know they shouldn’t like or trust him. fidelity of character means nothing to him. he’ll be whatever he needs to be as long as it gets him what he wants. the can-opening is just his way in.

#disco elysium #harry du bois #and it works on us the audience as well! #look at how many different versions of harry there are out there. each tailored to our individual preferences #we exaggerate and minimize his traits according to what we want to see. he's can-opening us too! #it's just like. of course his job will frame the can opening as a positive thing #but it's honestly one of his worst traits. or at least it is when he doesn't keep it in check #there's nothing wrong with wanting to understand people but the way he goes about it is harmful to everyone including himself #he's doing it because he has ulterior motives like 99.999998% of the time #this is mostly about pre-martinaise harry but i have no doubts that post-martinaise harry can go right back to this btw #a lot of us prefer to think of harry as drastically improving after martinaise which is great and i'd like to hope he does but. #it's also good to consider the overwhelming possibility that he will go right back to being a total shithead #and that may be completely unintentionally! which almost makes it worse! #ALSO. this is part of why kim makes a very good foil #for the most part kim will stonewall anything he doesn't feel like sharing #harry needs to respect boundaries and by god does kim have a lot of those (affectionate) #HOWEVER kim is definitely susceptible to the can opening as well #wait okay i have another post idea. #anyway thanks for reading. as always feel free to add and share thoughts! #kiwipost #hdb meta