#its wearing me thin

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#man ive never seen an eating disorder kill someone else besides a parent infecting a child but my nana is really trying #shes like 1000% orthotexic. will not eat anything not filled with vegetables or fat. and my grandpa is 87yo with a heart condition currentl #in the hospital for covid bc thry went to Christmas church and dont believe in being vaccinated and my dad is so frustrated #bc he knows his mom is not gonna give his dad hearty foods. he needs to eat like protein shakes and meat and ice cream. anything thats not #her cooking which sucks on top of being extremely healthy. except its not healthy bc they dont eat a balanced diet #so its my nanas eating disorder killing her husband and shes so fucking frustrating. im like 99% sure she has obsessive compulsive #personally disorder bc she fits to a T and has zero insight. she may have full on 0cd bc talking to my dad he has more obvious 0cd #compulsions than i do. he used to say phrases before going to bed and would take 2 steps across the floor to prevent bad things from #happening. so like im pretty sure my nana is where i get my perfectionism and 0cd. god. i wish i could express how fucked up she is #like my dad said at least he had a stable home to grow up in but like she has zero sympathy for other people. cannot look past herself. wil #not wear a mask bc she doesnt care enough abt other ppl. my dad was like: u would not have survived in that house. which is fair bc i am #barely keeping it together coming from a stable home with two sympathetic parents who i know love me #and like its sad that they're suffering the effects of buying into the fox news bullshit and its killing them #but also. genuinely. i think theyre not very good ppl. theyre the type of people who think they're better bc they're religious. white. and #thin. and theyre not better thsn anyone. their grandchildren cant stand them. well cant stand her at least. papa is just quite so its hard #to say what hes thinking. apparently he was confused last night and saying something about eating dinner on the golf course. which sounds #nicer thsn being in the hospital lol. ugh. he seems not long for this world tbh. may he pass peacefully to b with his 1st wife who died of #brain cancer at age like 20 or something. so it goes. bleh. how many funerals are intended for me in the next 5 years? hopefully none but #that seems improbable with the unspoken drain circling that seems to b going on in this family. old age and like almost 10 years of cancer #defying the stats but for how much longer? #i dunno. its just so weird to watch these things happen and not talk about it directly to the other ppl who see it #i worry that ill come off as too callose or inappropriate bc i have that tendency when something bad is happening but thats everyone else #excuse? idk i just feel like its better to talk abt things #unrelated #ed mention #i tell u this so i can say these things to someone and also bc if i were u. i would like to hear the drama #bc im nosey and i assume other r too ;-]

[co27]

cluelessghoul got me thinking, what if they wore clothes? so i did a quick take of my own :) normal and emo

#srmthfg #dnoodle #sparx #nova #spova #the stupid fucking logo on his shirt with his numbers on it is going to stick with me forever like this is going to become a permanent thin #sprx 77 #image desc in alt text #ALSO I KNOW THEYRE NOT ACTUALLY DRESSED IN EMO FASHION. its jsut a jokesies because i dont want to do deep analysis on exactly the type #of alternative fashion i think theyd wear #(nova wld be punk btw. to me. sparx is like... idk shitty skater grungey type i guess?) #(this makes me want to draw sparx and nova as like old metalheads.)

[vampirebiter]

so the property im house sitting at is like. pretty isolated and up a driveway that theres no possible way youre going to go all the way up on accident but a random unexpected car came up and didnt come back down as far as i could see so that is. very fun and not at all frightening ✌️

#i told my parents what was going on and they called the police to have them come check everything out. #no word on when thatll be because. like. mildly middle of nowhere and its cops. #realistically theyre gonna do fuck all. because again. its a cop. but theres no way im going up to check the other house rn. #itd be thin ice for me to go do it tomorrow morning if not for the animals i have to feed. #its been about an hour since it initially happened so ive calmed down a little bit but im still freaked out being alone like this #god itd be so fuckin cringe if i got murdered in this shitty slasher scenario. im wearing a fuckin halloween t shirt. #you cant be slashed while wearing a slasher thats embarrassing. #anyway. i doubt im gonna die. but it is scary when some motherfucker is outside #and you cannot see them #ghost.txt

[sundybundy]

one thing about me is im going to give up

#i can think of a lot of people ive tried to befriend recently that ive chased like a dog only to be ignored or met with indifference so #im going to lock in and win the idgaf war #i wear myself so thin doing things i normally wouldn't Just to get attention from people who dont want to know me #its weird and sad so im done #kcposting

[soldier-poet-king]

My boss stop talking about losing weight for her son's wedding challenge

#body image cw #MAAM. MAAM. U NEED TO STOP #at least once a week. and its giving me fitting rooms level agonies #she looks fine! bit shes like. well. its a straight sheath dress #MAYBE GET A DIFFERENT STYLE THEN???? and stop talking to ME abt it #I AM LITERALLY SO AVERAGE SIZED #but am convinced because i have A Stomach. yknow. where i store my organs and food #that means im awful because i get rolls when i sit #LIKE EVERY OTHER PERSON ON GODS GREEN EARTH #anyway. i dressed real cute today and i look gr8 #even tho i am inexplicably bloated. i didnt eat anything weird #but it is possible that allergy meds on an empty stomach was a mistake #anyway. itll be fine. im just ANNOYED #and im not actively trying to give myself an ED and yet MY BOSS PERSISTS #i simply. do not wear insta fashions made for impossibly thin bodies. and dress what fits MY mii shaped ass #also my fucked up pelvis alignment has given me lumbar lordosis and that certainly isnt helping

[archi-pelago]

.

#ngl. im really tired of being brave #of having to be clever and witty in the face of people who want to hurt me #and other people thinking its funny or cool #its not fun. im not having fun. im anxious all the time #i cant eat solids much anymore because im so anxious all the fuckin time #and its just about wearing a fucking mask #but people take it so personal #and to be honest i have thin skin. i just pretend to have thick skin #but i come home and fall apart and sit staring for hours unable to process anything because im not safe anywhere #but i just have to ignore it. because there's consequences for trying to stand up for yourself in the hellscape i live in #like getting fucking shot #so i get to be quiet and clever and pretend like nothing's wrong #i dont get a sense of superiority about wearing a mask. im just fucking tired and i dont want my sister to die #i dont know if i would care if i died to be honest. i think it might bum out some friends #and i would like to do some things before then #but my coworkers already think im dying so

[thevaudevillescene]

Yesterday, while talking about my serving job, my office coworker said, “You ever feel like you’re in a Broadway show, like it’s just the same thing repeating night after night?” I said, “Absolutely. There’s a song in the Beetlejuice musical where he goes, ‘I do this bullshit, like, eight times a week,’ and I swear I think of it every single day on my way to work.”

A couple of weeks ago a woman at one of my tables asked if I’m “in the theater” and I said no, and she was like, “oh, you just seem like you have that personality.” I don’t need to join the local theater, ma’am, I already act for a living at this job. You’re simply seeing through the cracks in my carefully crafted but summer-worn worksona. I said to my coworker, “I was just assigned theater kid by this woman,” and they said, “She probably clocked that you’re gay but she’s too straight to realize it so she was like, ‘She must…do theater.’”

#so don’t be freaked. stay in your seats. i do this bullshit like eight times a week. #so just relax; you’ll be fine. drink your $50 wine and take a breath. #<- truly me whenever customers start getting pissed about fucking anything #my patience is wearing SO thin which is how i know it’s august #last week i let a table know their food was on its way and asked if they needed anything before it came out #and the guy goes ‘yeah when’s our food coming?’ i was like ‘..AS I SAID-’ #last night a woman asked if she could sub out pasta for a vegetable and i said ya the options are blah blah blah #she was like ‘a veggie sauté? what’s that?’ i said ‘it’s a mix of vegetables.’ ‘but what’s in it?’ #i just flipped her menu over while holding eye contact with her and pointed to the description on the menu #my other favorite: can i get you anything else to drink besides water? coke diet coke sprite iced tea lemonade club soda? #‘can i have a root beer?’ ‘do u guys have dr. pepper?’ #…… #COKE. DIET COKE. SPRITE. ICED TEA- #‘oh okay i’ll have a pepsi’ #AND I HOPE YOU DIE. I HOPE WE BOTH DIE.

[seithr]

unfortunately the allure of "at work i genuinely don't think that much and have no time or capacity to worry about home because i am fully mentally 'at work'" and "at work my family isnt there and i am not reminded of things happening in it by being asked about it by one of them or seeing them" and "at least i make money at work and am there often enough its a good amount and i feel useful lookibg at it" is really startibg to wear thin rifgt now

#i like not thinking i like being so caught in my sorting and doing a good job and helping people i dont feel the coldness settlibg in #i like not havibg sudden run ins i overthink later or being asked What Do You Think Haha in front of people id like to not air laundry to #people who respect me enough to wish well when im just a little bit not all there but dont want My Answer About It or My Assurance #i like not having to consider another job or parrttime searching again and scheduling both them at the same time #i like not thinking man but now im sfucking tired going too. when im cloxked in i turn all this off and i wish i could always be that way #helpful! im happy to help! im glad to. no worries no problem. thoughtful and useful and a joy if a little in need of guidance #the build up to therr. thinking about all of it alone on the way. always the sitting with it. the hours settling in #its wearing thin. something about it is. i think its only me. i wish i worked all the time so i wouldnt wind down back to all of this #everything here and reality going on and all the bad news and every bad memory and experience and incoming ache fffffuuck me man #im fine before anyone (noone) gets conc3rnened im just so tired. im so cold. nothing will come out. do i really need that as proof it hurts

[lilakennedy]

From one belt to the next, in the span of 2 weeks - First one wins in the cute department, but given that the new one is actually prescribed for my pain, it wins overall ♥

#i am gonna MAKE THIS GREY & BLUE CORSET WORK #if the clothing is thin enough i can wear it OVER it #but if its like..a sweater i gotta wear it underneath #the backbrace/corset belt is to help my leg issues #i am SUPER GLAD i got it - just a bit sad that i cannot wear my decor one anymore #the medical one is just - hands down - SO much more important! #the black decor corset is like...super elastic - it really isnt nearly as tight as it looks #so it was fun to wear!! #but my leg issues have priority #it doesnt fix everything but it fixes some of the struggle i got with my right leg :) #i just wanted to share this cause this turn of events makes me so happy!! #yes thats an elsa bracelet in the second one #also can you tell? it got much warmer in 2 weeks KDJSFHF #lila post

[rabble-dabble]

John Egbert's ideal man is Karkat with a mullet.

you take that back right now. i will NEVER draw that do you hear me. /shakes you DO YOU HEAR ME

exploding this ask to the moon

#answered #anon #evil john anon #gif #AKHSDKFAHSKDRJHKAHFKHSFKL #all in /j of course #but not the mullet thing. mullet isnt /j #but the. the mullet. yearh im never drawing a mullet on any character except Keith from Voltron and that guy is already on thin ice #sorry but my personal life belief is that. ok dont laugh but PEOPLE WITH MULLETS ARE UGLY #sorry people are not ugly just. mullets themselves. its a fuckin MULLET #do you UNDERSTAND. WORST HAIRSTYLE IN THE HISTORY OF EVER #'business in the front party in the back' NOOOOOOOO!!! ITS A CREATURE OF DESTRUCTION AND DOOM!!!! KILL IT!!!! #disgusting. a disgrace. who would ever wear that hairstyle. if you wear that hairstyle Im Sorry For Your Loss #my brother had a mullet once. it was So fucking Bad i kid you not im cryign do you understand #DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!!! NO MULLETS!!!! THEYRE GODS WORST CREATURE #ahem. anyways <- he says as if he's normal. for hating mullets #anyways thanks for the ask even though you are wrong #im gonna pretend to be normal about it

[peachy-doodles]

uhmm! more doodles to figure em out. if you see the way i draw them fluctuating drastically between all my drawings no you dont <3 

#submas #submas bros #subway boss ingo #subway boss emmet #subway bosses #pokemon #pokemon ingo #pokemon emmet #subway master ingo #subway master emmet #subway master nobori #subway master kudari #hcs #headcanon #once again asking myself why do these two have so many tags. and why do i bother to type them all. woteva #saw someone say ingo was a goth ONCE and its stuck with me and ive turned him into a goth/punk #emmet wears literally anything. theyre both nb but in drasticly different ways skghgks #ALSO realised the potential behind thinning eyebrows and now they will have eyebrows like that from now on :)

[youngestdaughtersyndrome]

ok and with that im logging off bc i got work to do ..... byebye

#STILL mad abt the aesthetics thing n thinking abt the various ways its impacted me .... imagine growing up in a massively diverse and #creative subculture based around surfing only to find that everyone online has diluted 'surfer' into 'blonde girl wearing billabong' #like genuinely i hope aesthetics like that die. notably its also a thin white blond girl which is genuinely so far off the mark its horrific #hollyws

[butchez]

guysss when does persona 4 get good

#currently in the middle of rises dungeon for reference. #maybe its just my patience wearing thin but i feel like the cast has been losing its likeability ......glaring at yosuke #and nanako hasnt wanted to hang out with me bc im a fail brother with a cringe expression stat ☹️‼️ #jude talks #persona lb

[theygender]

Me: if you're from a typically hot climate and you're not used to dealing with the weather you're getting from this snow storm, one thing you can do is wear a warmer layer like leggings under your jeans—

1 million people: actually jeans are TERRIBLE at keeping you warm, why would you recommend for someone to wear ONLY jeans, you need ANOTHER LAYER UNDERNEATH THEM IDIOT

1 billion more people: ACTUALLY jeans can get WET. these texans you're talking to need to wear the waterproof snow pants that they definitely already own in their hot climate you moron

#rambling #i understand that people are trying to be helpful. but the reading comprehension on this site is fucking dreadful #and having hundreds of people in my notes acting like im stupid is gonna make me start biting #PEOPLE IN HOT CLIMATES DO NOT OWN WATERPROOF SNOW PANTS OR WOOL CLOTHING OH MY GOD #THEIR OPTIONS FOR PANTS ARE ALMOST DEFINITELY GOING TO BE LIMITED TO JEANS AND THIN SWEATPANTS #AND SWEATPANTS ARE NOT GOING TO KEEP OUT THE -30° WIND CHILL BC THEY DONT FUCKING BLOCK WIND #THATS WHY I SAID JEANS FOR THE OUTER LAYER. BC JEANS /BLOCK WIND/ #I KNOW THAT THEY WONT KEEP YOUR BODY HEAT IN WITHOUT WEARING ANOTHER LAYER UNDERNEATH #THATS WHY I SPECIFICALLY SAID TO WEAR ANOTHER LAYER UNDERNEATH #I KNOW THAT ITS DANGEROUS TO WEAR WET JEANS IN THE COLD. IT IS ALSO DANGEROUS TO WEAR WET SWEATPANTS IN THE COLD #IF SOMEONE DOESNT OWN WATERPROOF SNOW PANTS OR WOOL CLOTHING ALL OF THEIR OPTIONS ARE GOING TO BE DANGEROUS TO WEAR WET IN THE COLD #THE ONLY GOOD SOLUTION IS TO TRY NOT TO GET WET AND CHANGE OUT OF WET LAYERS QUICKLY IF YOU DO #AND IF THEIR OPTIONS WHEN THEY MANAGE TO STAY DRY ARE 'BLOCK THE WIND CHILL' OR 'DONT BLOCK THE WIND CHILL' #IM GOING TO RECOMMEND TO BLOCK THE FUCKING WIND CHILL #im glad this post is making the rounds to help people but it is BY FAR the most annoying responses i have gotten from any post that blew up #and any time i try to post an explanation it just gets buried under like a hundred more people #responding with more of those exact same comments with varying levels of condescension 😭