think about all the places we could go
buck/eddie | 2k+ | ao3
“I,” Athena says, slowly, “have a lot of questions.”
“That’s understandable,” Eddie says. “Take your time.”
Athena takes two long, deep breaths. The other officer next to her doesn’t seem to know where to look; Buck sees him desperately pretend to be interested in the one solitary picture Eddie has hanging on his wall, like their family trip to the zoo is pertinent to the matter at hand. “I don’t suppose anyone knows about this,” Athena says.
It’s not a question, but Buck is also currently wang-out in front of his boss’s wife, so he has enough self-preservation not to get caught on semantics, now. “Uh, no ma’am.”
“Don’t you ma’am me,” says Athena.
“Sorry.”
The other officer is now almost nose-to-nose to the picture with the force of his feigned ignorance. Athena just looks grieved. “Why, then,” she says, “did you get military-grade handcuffs? Were the pink fuzzy ones not macho enough for you?”
Her tone drips with derision. She’s absolutely going home to tell Bobby all about this. “We kept, uh, breaking the pink fuzzy ones,” Eddie admits, and then, “Buck, don’t preen.”
“I’m not preening,” Buck says, probably definitely preening, but like it’s his fault, okay? It’s good to know the bicep curls are working. “Look, we’re two big firefighters. Those flimsy sex store handcuffs weren’t gonna hold us.”
read on ao3!
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when horror movies become therapy
it's been a year after the webtoon's final events, and the gang still can't watch real horror movies.
OR a sbg future au consisting purely of fluff, sleepovers, and, well, horror movies.
—
You would think, that one year later, things would have settled down. That everyone would be trying to get their lives back together, figure things out, and leave the past far, far, behind them.
The truth could not be farther from that.
The six of them have huddled together on Ashlyn's slightly bouncy couch, watching a crappy horror movie that was way too loud and way too flashy.
Watching horror movies had become a tradition between them, like a "take that" to everything they'd been through. It was a slow climb, sure, but it was something to do, and it made them all feel a little bit accomplished. Not being scared of another movie felt like giving a middle finger to the horror movie they lived through- almost like a step towards being... normal again.
Plus, they got to do it together.
"Someday," Taylor mutters, "We'll have the guts to go and watch a real horror film without freaking out."
Aiden snorts, shifting on the couch to avoid being squished between Tyler and Ashlyn. "Please, you wouldn't last ten seconds in an actual movie theatre."
She flicks him in the shoulder and sighs in pretend exasperation, "Please, you didn't last ten seconds in an actual movie theatre." She retorts, raising her eyebrows.
Aiden looks away, slightly red and embarrassed, "That was like, three months ago! And it was scary, okay? The ghoul thing looked like a phantom. There's no way you weren't scared too."
She can't deny that she'd also been freaking out, but Aiden's vocal reaction had made the entire group laugh for hours. He'd gotten up on his chair and screamed curses at the theatre screen, then spider-jumped two rows down and bounced outside. No, literally, he was practically hopping, flailing his arms and running out the door like an Olympic sprinter. He denies it, for some reason, justifying it with a flick of his hand and an insistence of it being only for the dramatics.
"Never said we weren't scared," Ashlyn blurts, grabbing a handful of sweet-and-salty popcorn out of an oddly geometrically decorated bowl, "Just sayin' that you didn't need to run out like Logan did when we first met him."
Logan squawks indignantly, "I did not run when I first met you!" He gets up to snatch some popcorn from Ashlyn's bowl, and makes an unpleasant face when he pops one into his mouth. "God, this is like if table salt and caramel had a baby, and then left it alone in a cornfield for a century."
"It's delicious," Ashlyn frowns, "You're taste buds are just deformed."
"I-"
"Guys," Tyler groans, "Can we just watch the fucking movie?"
Aiden leans over to ruffle his hair, causing Tyler to squeak and try to move away. "Aw, poor Tyler," He snickers, "I think he's enjoying the movie. We should all be quiet and let him watch it, then."
"I'm not!" He protests, because the film is terrible and it would be incredibly embarrassing to enjoy it, "I just want you guys to shut up."
Taylor frowns, "No you don't," She declares, definitively.
He groans, "Either you guys watch the movie and shut up, or you turn off the movie and complain about disfigured salt babies for hours. There is no in-between."
Ben types something on his iPad and raises it for the rest to see, Both, please, and thank you. He smirks slightly, clearly proud of pissing Tyler off.
He groans, "You guys are exhausting, I'm leaving. I have to get to practice early tomorrow anyway."
"No!" Aiden screams, launching himself at the tired boy, "You are not allowed to leave, buddy. You are being held hostage by the Phantom Busters, please do not rebel in any form or way."
"I... plead the fifth?" He blinks, knowing that there isn't any way out of this.
"We're having a sleepover," Logan declares, "No negotiations necessary. Or allowed."
Tyler rolls his eyes, but his irritated persona is broken when he smiles, "Yeah, sure, fine, whatever."
Ashlyn grabs another handful of popcorn, "You know, you do have to ask the person whose house it is if you want to have a sleepover, right?"
"Nope," Aiden shrugs, "But I asked your mom already."
She snorts, throwing a piece of popcorn at him, "When the hell did you do that?"
It lands in Taylor's hair, and she swats it off quickly.
"Like, right before we started the movie? You just didn't see me 'cause I'm a fucking ninja," He finger-guns her and swirls around, "Now, if you will excuse me, I must notify my parents that they are free of another morning with me."
The movie has stopped playing, and when Ashlyn finally notices, she furrows her eyebrows, "When the hell did the movie turn off?"
Ben waves the remote and throws it to Aiden, who just put his phone down.
"It's been confisticated," Aiden declares, punching his hand in the air like he's holding a gold medal instead of a TV remote.
Logan sighs, "Confiscated," he corrects.
"That's what I fucking said!"
"Whatever," Taylor waves him off, "We can finish the movie tomorrow. You guys want to play charades?"
"Can I be a clown?"
She sighs, "It doesn't work like tha-"
"Don't worry, Aiden, you don't need to pretend," Tyler grins, then ducks away from the popcorn kernel Aiden chucks at him.
"I hate you," He snaps back, with no heat behind his words.
"Ditto," He replies, still basking in the warmth of Aiden's rage.
The blonde calms down rather quickly, or at least he hides his anger as fast as possible. "You know what, thank you. I am a wonderful clown and as I stand here today, I demand justice for all the clowns in the world! You have wronged them, Sir Tyler of the Hernandez." He bows dramatically.
Taylor wheezes, "I need to get that printed on a T-shirt, oh my god."
Aiden nods rapidly, "Oh my god, absolutely, we need matching T-shirts and like, earrings."
You don't even have your ears pierced. Ben types, sharing an amused glance with Logan.
"What about the clip-on things? We could totally get that!!"
Tyler flops back onto the couch, nearly knocking into Logan, who pushes him away lightly. "Aiden, you have too much energy right now, and it's almost midnight. Can we sleep now?"
Aiden looks at him like he's insane, "Who goes to sleep during a sleepover?"
"Me. Good night, Aiden," Tyler smiles, amused.
"Fine," He grumbles, "Let's get the sleeping bags out."
The fact that they all had sleeping bags at Ashlyn's house only proved that they had slept over way too many times to count. Not that she minded though, it was nice having people around, and now that she was comfortable with them, it was almost relaxing.
Sure, it got tiring sometimes, but it was a small price to pay.
Besides, without them, who else would she watch horror movies with?
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would your stans be the type to solve disagreements with a just dance battle since theyre pacifists
yes...i support this.
***my stans both claim they wont stop putting up peace signs in pictures until theres world peace lmaooo
i am not sure, however...that they would win many.
cue me combining the complicated answer to your simple question with some ncu dance headcannons, but i do hope they thrill you!
but alright, so i said that because...
...i am not convinced whatsoever that pep!stan has rhythm.
which musically, of course, he is very gifted. he can sing and play guitar really well, could probably pick up other instruments if he tried.
one of my favorite headstannons actually ( and i think its present across both stans ) is that he has perfect pitch...and when kyle and him are arguing and kyle is lecturing him stan gets suuuuper annoying and starts being like "a, b, e flat, wow f sharp" KYLE GETS SOOOOO MAD ITS SO DKHSDLHDS hes so annoying help
however, being musically gifted does not mean...you can dance.
and in the baggy ass, gigantic ass skater boy jeans, the gigantic slouchy metal hoodies, the big beanie, his greasy ass blonde bangs all up in his ( cute little ) face and his vans untied...its a no from me.
like dead sober he's just hella stiff, has no interest in dancing, every single prom or dance he's been to with wendy was actually hell omg
BUUUUUUUT....drunk stan ;)
he will get SOOO WEIRD!!! hes down like oh my god, like dead sober stan is like ready to die if there is dancing, drunk stan is pulling you on the dance floor, sloppy as hell, spinnin you around, kissin ur hand!
like is it good dancing? no absolutely not? is it lit? absolutely.
okay like specifically, him and kenny? TOGETHER? it goes so hard like stan learned dance moves for one reason and one reason only and was to turn up to parties and absolutely fuck! it! up!
WAIT OK THE FOOTBALL ONE WHEN STAN SHOWS UP TO THE FUNCTION LATE AS HELL STILL IN HIS FOOTBALL JERSEY??? I JUST KNOW KYLE IS SWEATING WHEN HE SMIRKS AT HIM
also i just remembered that i canonically after winning shot roulette, had extremely drunk stan get up on the kitchen counter and drop it low to im sexy and i know it and collect dollar bills like a stripper and..
u know what!!!! it was definitely a low budget strip tease at best, very messy, the man has litrally no ass, but he is FINE so u know what, he looked good, he put on a s-h-o-w and no one was complaining!!!! especially not kyle when stans shirt flew off and hit him in the face.
whEW!
....a lot of dreams abt that one, huh kyle?
( i do think that all night kyle is trying to be Responsible and is like
[ throwback pep chapter 2 to kyles stmwtp contact photo ]
i should take stan home he should not be drunk and doing hand(stan)ds breaking the keg stand record....but then stans shirt falls down, he gets football boy ab-ed and winked at so hes like...nevermind thats so crazy...he can have five more minutes this is my favorite show <3 salhds )
hooooowever! moving right along:
conversely, i do think ravenstan...can definitely Dance.
but. BUT!!!!!!!
i will say...he had to be TAUGHT!!!!!! PAINSTAKINGLY!!!!! HOW TO DANCE!!!!!! it was a Miserable process. it was so painful, oh my god. hes so awkward, god bless him. he was SOOO BAD. he was like guys i cannot do this???? i give up!!!!!! and kenny and the cd boys were like u can do this rae!!! this is ur Dream and he was like...sigh...SIGH.
and did...eventually get...honestly? kind of good? hello? excuse me???
RAVENSTAN???? HELLLLOOOOOO
okay also i do think he had a small boost like i do think that rm!sharon definitely had rhythm af and used to spin shelley and stan around the kitchen making dinner with the mexican radio station blaring. <333
( so hes got a lil bit of That going on...lets go half mexican ravenstan )
but also...if u want to be Absolutely Miserable...pre!raven!stan who was 11 was learning how to formally dance around that time because of the sadie hawkins dance, but more specifically...because of shelley's birthday...specifically...
her quinceanara.
which she never got to have...
...because she died three days before her birthday. :)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
fun!
stan still knows those moves by the way! he is haunted! Hi, PTSD!
aka Phantom There's Shelley Disorder!
but yes, raven learned how to dance because he had to learn how to dance, but that does not mean he likes doing it or that he is sober.
he also gets to coast mostly on sex appeal and being hot and looking into ur eyes, so like if he fucks up its kinda just like damn thats crazy i didnt see anything but ur very pretty eyes raven whatever u want, hansome!!!!! its a lot of powersliding and hip stuff...whew! lis...ten.
Aaaaaaaanyways!
tldr; just dance in front of every1? i think he would eat tbh its his job
BUT PRIVATELY? uhhhh...i think he would be nervous as fuck and on top of that i think jersey kyle would look at him once and he would fall in his ass and fall into something and break his arm its that unserious
so basically neither of my stans can dance, but both of them can dance way better drunk bc they are relaxed and raven was just forced at gunpoint to learn how to Move so he can...
and 2 well tbh. ;)
sahdkshdls
ALRIGHT I ADDED MY KYLE HEADCANNONS JUST FOR FUNSIES!
ok i went back and forth on this for a while.
i was like do i give kyle no rhytmn? can he dance?
my answer is that when both my kyles are dead sober theyre like so far infused into the wall that they are literally the structural integrity of the house party, like so far from the dance floor, judging literally everyone, sneering at everyone, disapproving glares...
and naturally this makes u thirsty because its hard work, u know, being a full time fucking HATER
gotta drink the haterade which, ofc, is a hard cider/seltzer for pep!kyle and is probably cheap grocery store wine for jersey
BUT WHEN HE HAS LIKE TWO OR THREE OF THOSE
ohhhhhh my god
drunk!kyle ;)))))))))))))))
DRUNK KYLE IS SO FUN!!!! HES FOR THE STREETS!!!!!!!
they gave him way too much ass and for no goddamn reason like hello???? HELLO???? like i think he does his little white mom dance moves his little taylor swift awkward bird boy sways HES VIBING!!! tbh i think hes kind of good??? like??? okay kyle???? lets go bitch!!!
ALSO IF MEGAN THEE MOTHERFUCKING STALLION COMES ON HE IS RAPPING AND THROWING SERIOUS ASSSSSSSSSSSSSS
like do not think i forgot that marjorine taught kyle how to twerk and that jerseys entire running playlist is just like Fuck Being Good Im A Bad Bitch!!!! like just iconic loud female rap for like 30 minutes skhdksskdhks IT GETS DIRTY FREAKY NAAAASTY IN THERE!!!
like stan and kyle in any ncuniverse dancing at the function is INSAAAAAAAAANE like it is an event!!! stan is like okayokayokaaay!
go white boy gooooooooo!!!!
hes really just in shock and awe, every time kyle gets loose enough to hit the dance floor its the best night of his lifeeeee i mean that omg
Heart Eyes Emoji! he is SIMPING!
( honestly i think if u specifically put raven and jersey on the dance floor turnt the fuck up it would go viral like sheeeeeeeeeeeeesh ohmygod...is it hot in here??? ravesey stan twitter Blowing Up! )
tbh my fav style at parties hc specifically like pepstyle when they start dating is that whereas stan would usually be like the last person to leave a party, when him and kyle start dating, they truly just get schwifty, makeout against the fridge and irish goodbye everyone like out of the blue, kyle is like i want to go home ;) and stan is like yEAH BYE EVERYONE SEE YOU LMAOOO KSHDLSD literally sprints out the door holding kyles hand!!! unserious!!! boys!!! down horrendous!
also to be fair jersey kyle is just such a tangle of long limbs but he took really strict and rigorous ballet courses so professionally and in refined settings he dances very beautifully...but at parties...when hes Blasted...its a mess, its so unhinged but hes REEEEALLY CUUUTE
one day i will put drunk!jersey and raven in a room and when that day comes u will all simply not be ready but im warning u anyways. <3
i did not answer your question very well, but i hope this was fun.
-uncle nina, who is...not even sure what i was trying to say?
p.s. wait i know he doesnt count technically but toolshed stan can do crazy acrobatics and shit so he can dance for Surely and would actually probably DESTROY! just dance but probably pretends to be really bad for his secret identity...human kite!kyle i want to say is an awkward alien king like learning english and strange earth customs was hard enough dancing is so weird he is not good at it...Inchresting
me in denial abt the grimy fucked up weirdly political dystopian in terms of mutants and public judgements and propaganda tfbw stan-kyle-kite-shed love square au rip oh my god dont let me do it guys
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