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princessofprocrastination · 3 years

Text

Just A Bet (GeorgeNotFound)

MASTERLIST

pairing : georgenotfound / george x reader - dreamwastaken/dream / clay x reader

summary : you’re just a bet to him. that is, until he realizes that you’re someone with a title. he scrambles to pick up your broken pieces, but he doesn’t realise that he’s too late. (angst) (trigger warning) (happy ending)

a/n : here’s sorta a little AU for you guys, don’t take any of this seriously, some things in this are clearly made up. side note ; holy shit i have more than a 100 followers right now. thank you so so much.

everyone has probably dreamt of being a princess, a real one. for example, when the movie ‘the princess diaries’ came out, people wanted to be mia thermopolis and rule genovia.

sounds like a dream, that is, to be going to high school and have plenty of paparazzi’s chasing you, or to be able to be recognized everywhere.

in reality, it is the complete opposite of living the dream. you could barely walk out without being recognized if you didn’t cover up your face in some way. you were restricted to do many things, even to just hang out with your friends to grab lunch.

to other people, they might just tell you to suck it up, that in the end of the day, you’re royalty, and that these are only tiny problems.

you agreed, sure. but you did want to smell the fresh flowers outside. you wanted to be able to get food from wherever, with whoever without people’s prying eyes.

you just wanted freedom.

to whom might be reading this might be confused. you’re a princess. just like the movie, yes. princess of saudi arabia, you are.

you are fairly young, still in your twenties. most people your age are out having fun going on a girls night, or still studying for their degrees, or even working right now.

but you were prohibited to leave the castle. you were told to leave on the queen’s orders, only during meal times.

some days, you really liked it, being a princess. if you weren’t being egoistical, you would say that your face really did suit the royal title.

you didn’t have to leave your room to make stacks of money. but the problem with that was, what would you do with the money if you couldn’t leave the house?

so you went on the internet. you settled on the internet. with the queen’s permission, of course.

sure, she can be strict like all the time, but she tried her best to give you your freedom. so she let you have social media accounts. you being you, the public immediately found your accounts.

you couldn’t find new friends, they were too scared to come across you. so you just entertained yourself.

this isn’t bragging, but a lot of people knew who you were, but that doesn’t mean everyone does.

since you barely had a childhood, with being born and raised royal, you entertained yourself watching minecraft youtubers. for some reason, it calmed you.

dream team, as you called the group, caught your eye. you watched all of their videos, caught up with every single live streams of theirs, even followed their instagrams and twitters.

one morning, when you woke up, you found your instagram notifications fuller than other days. you were fairly confused. that is, until you realised that the whole of dream team had followed you back.

they definitely know who you are and what you do now, right? they have a large fanbase, surely, they would’ve told the boys.

your followers, since seeing the boys follow you, have told you to start playing games. you didn’t disappoint them. you asked your parents if you could and they granted you permission to do whatever you wanted.

they told you “this would entertain the public and love you even more.” and smiled at you. you thought maybe they hit themselves in the head today with the leniency they gave you. but you pushed that thought. maybe they thought you have grown old enough.

valkyrae, a streamer on twitch had reached out to you after knowing about your gaming desires. she asked if you wanted to join her and her group to play among us together.

you almost immediately agreed and the rest of her friends welcomed you in with opened arms.

your mum gave you one condition, that you had to follow in order to film yourself playing games. that is, if you kept yourself poised and respectable. you agreed to her shenanigans and started to play with rae.

playing with her meant that you met countless different content creators, such as corpse husband and pokimane. they all were super nice to you, even when you had told them that they didn’t have to be nice to you because of your title.

soon you had found yourself in an amazing group of friends and you felt great about yourself.

you and rae had sustained such amazing friendship that she had came over to your house multiple times for meals.

you’d text her “come over to my house, let’s eat lunch.”

and she’d reply with “your castle you mean?” she jokes around.

your friendship was loved by many people out there.

one thing you didn’t say was that not everyone was obligated to know who you are, which then happens to be funny to see when they did end up finding out who you are.

just the fact that they show such shock to their faces, and the tone in their voice changes.

“holy fuck, she’s royal.” toast says as he came back from googling your name to know more about how you came about in a game of among us.

“i’m so sorry for the past rounds.” he apologizes for the time he accuses you for no reason.

“please treat me the same way you used to, i’m just y/n when i’m playing games, definitely not a princess.” you told him.

you didn’t have a big ego, although your parents did. “they need to know that you’re important.” they told you, but it never stuck to you. you wanted to be respected as a person, for your personalities, not because of a stupid title you were born in.

sykkuno, rae and you had decided to make an smp, where you three would start building things for fun and stream it.

you three had enough fun until it got boring, for you to start asking your other friends to join. the first person you offered to tour your little world was corpse since you and him had clicked so well.

because you started playing minecraft and streaming it, it got the attention of minecraft youtubers. and for some reason, the seventeen year old, tommyinnit had found you interesting enough to talk to you.

with tommy being that close to you, you attracted tubbo and wilbur soot, as well.

“i am in a vc with a princess.” tommy had said on stream when you two decided to play minecraft along with tubbo and wilbur.

sure, the teenage boy got a little annoying at times, but you found it entertaining and funny. of course, tommy being tommy, he’d ask slightly personal questions about how royalty works in saudi arabia.

not that he knew how royalty works in general, anyways.

“the queen is still my favourite woman, but you come in close second.” he told you once. you laughed at that.

no big title could stop you from fangirling the moment the man, dream itself had sent you a donation, and then later sending you a direct message.

“let’s play minecraft together soon, seen me your discord.” he dmed you one day. of course you complied.

for some reason, you never had the chance to play with george, and you played minecraft with sapnap and dream separately, never together. not that you were complaining.

you decided on a more chill and laid back stream on that specific day, not really feeling like going on a minecraft server or play among us with your bestfriends when you got a text from an unknown number.

hey. they sent

who’s this? you sent a text back.

my bad, this is george. they sent a text back to you.

holy shit. why would george text you. sure, you have played minecraft and among us with him sometimes but he isn’t one to give out his number so this was weird to you.

although you consider to be close to the entirety to the dream team, you often tried to avoid texting them, especially outside of streaming. you didn’t want it to be awkward or tense.

surprisingly, as your conversation with george lengthened, it became less and less awkward. the more you two texted, the more you felt like you and him had been friends for the longest time.

being the princess, raised in a castle meant that you didn’t really have a social life. other than being put together with some prince of another country in hopes you’ll fall in love with them or marry them, you haven’t really had a legitimate boyfriend. not even a crush.

to you, the princes in the world can be arrogant, snobby. they act like they are the most important thing in the world, that if they walk in a restaurant, everyone was to drop all their work for other people to entertain them.

sure, this could just be the way that they were raised, but you didn’t want that in a man, a husband. it wouldn’t kill to be a little humble.

princes are also a bore. they live practically the same lifestyle as you. conversations were never interesting, always the usual.

to summarise this, since you and george have been talking and texting, you had fallen for him. hard. and it seems like he’s feeling the same way, just that the both of you hadn’t really said anything.

DREAM’S POV

being really close friends with someone, more than one person, bestfriends, that is, meant that we had a group chat together.

nothing constructive was ever said, only boys being boys.

nick was the one to bring it up. and since he is the youngest, he sure does say some stupid things.

dude, you should try to get in y/n’s pants. nick asked george in the groupchat.

there was a running joke between the nick and i. george lives under a rock, basically. when everyone was walking on eggshells around you, trying not to offend a princess, he never really cared.

and that was when nick and i found out that george had no clue you held such a title on your pretty little head.

you are a beautiful girl, no doubting that. i was sure that many people, even before you started streaming had a major crush on you. george definitely fits right in. he was practically vomiting hearts when he first saw you.

it was meant to be funny. it was never meant to go this far. nick didn’t mean for his little bet to break a heart, let alone a princess.

but he did. well, technically george did. he was so brutal with it. he toyed with your feelings, like he had no care in this world.

no one would’ve guessed that the little cute, short george would do something as bad as he did.

and now, no one can find you. no one.

you were there, smiling in front of your camera one day and you were gone the other. just gone. no one knew where you went.

granted, you are royal. it must not be hard to get people to hide you. but at the same time, you had major reporters trying to find you. and they couldn’t. what does that leave us?

where did you go?

come back.

and although i know you want to hear this from george instead of his friends, you won’t. because he probably doesn’t.

we miss you.

please just text us, we need to know you’re safe.

YOUR POV

you left. you had to. it had been extremely humiliating.

you didn’t think someone as sweet as george would do that, it all happened so quick.

you had flown to england to meet him. he encouraged you to. it felt amazing to leave your hometown, you’ve lived there all your life. you definitely needed to fresh air.

it took a lot of convincing your parents to let you fly to england. without a doubt, you knew that the only way you’ll get to leave is if you had a guard with you.

this isn’t that kind of cliche story, your guard could literally be your dad, get your head out of the gutter, you are utterly in love with george, and you were sure george knew that and that’s why he encouraged you to fly to him.

the first couple of days were fun. he brought you to all over brighton for you to experience what it’s like in england. he told you he wanted you to get your first real experience as a tourist, and that was what he did.

winding down for the night, you brought him to relax in your hotel suite. frankly, george was surprised that you could afford such a place. but he didn’t want to ask where you got the money from, he didn’t really care.

all he wanted to do was to complete his dare. his ego was too big to lose this time.

that night was when you decided to tell him about your feelings about him. you were pretty confident that it was going to go smooth sailing. just the way he treated you showed so much about his feelings.

so you did, you told him. while you told him that you love him, more than friends love each other, he looked you in the eyes. you weren’t sure what that meant.

but he smiled. or smirked, you weren’t sure.

and he kissed you. and the night didn’t end with you just kissing.

so you thought the night was amazing, that it couldn’t get any better than that.

that was, until you woke up the next morning.

you woke up, sun shining straight into your suite, curtains wide open.

although you didn’t really feel the presence of another person in the room with you, you brushed it off. you felt like something was off, that something was missing.

you rolled over in your hotel bed, to see if the british man was laying next to you.

he wasn’t. in fact, he was not in the hotel room at all. you checked the bathroom, the small little living room in your suite. he was found nowhere.

you tried to see if he had left traces of himself in your hotel room, a sign that he was indeed there and that you hadn’t been dreaming it all.

but the pain between your legs caused by the brit told you that it was all not a dream.

so you did what a logical person would, text him. maybe he left to get food.

but you knew that wasn’t the case the moment you had unlocked your phone.

texts flood in, your social media notifications seemed to not be stopping anytime soon.

you opened your texts messages. a couple from your parents, a lot from rae, multiple from some minecraft youtubers who you called friends.

besides your parents, they were asking if you were okay. they were telling you to stay safe and to lay off social media for a while.

your parents were practically screaming at you through texts. they called you a disgrace, not an honour to the family. you didn’t understand where this was coming from.

you opened twitter, knowing that it was going to be the easiest way for you to find out what had happened, and why were you involved in it.

you were trending. number one worldwide. you clicked on your name. your phone left your hand, falling hard to your hotel floor with a loud thud as you covered your mouth with both your hands, crying.

two pictures. two photos that said it all.

first photo was of you in bed, obviously naked under the hotel duvet. you were still sleeping. there was light coming from the windows, that showed that it had barely been sunrise when it was taken.

second photo was what hit you the hardest. you wanted the earth to swallow you from below. it was a photo of your back, very naked back. it was clear that it was a photo that had been taken during sex.

and it was obvious who you had it with, because he was the one who posted it all over twitter.

george.

that was why he left, with no traces of him ever being in the hotel room.

you weren’t sure what was his motive. but you sure did know that he had completely broke you.

crying, you picked up your phone from the floor, calling rae.

“oh my god, tell me you’re okay.” she was panicking on the phone.

“i need to leave.” you told her. you knew that she would immediately understand the severity of the four words you told her.

since then, you never came back. to the eyes of public, it was as if you never even existed. you were gone.

you moved with rae.

she had to leave her roommates to settle in with you. her roommates weren’t mad at her for leaving them. they completely understood, you needed the help.

although her roommates wanted to help you, they couldn’t. you needed to have the least amount of people to be with you.

it didn’t help that they were all content creators, too.

rae told people that she moved because she wanted her own space, so that she can make better videos. when she announced she was moving, not one person speculated that you had been the reason of her move.

you paid for the house, you needed to. you owed her. no matter the amount of times she told you that you owed her nothing, that she was just doing it because she loves you, you couldn’t let her pay for a single thing.

you needed to up your security, too. so you two had decided to get a house that was pretty big, somewhere in the mountains, with top security, away from other people.

your parents soon calmed down after that day. they told you to come back, the begged you to come back. but you told them that you needed the time alone at that moment, and assured them that you would be okay.

so they did what parents would. they made sure you were well taken care of. they sent you massive amounts of money, sent your their trusted guards to stay around the house.

they did this all for you without the knowledge of the public.

your parents told reporters that you were well safe, and would not be in the public eye, not until you were ready.

you helped rae film certain videos. well, not like there was anything good to do in the massive mansion, anyways.

all your social media pages were still up, just not updated. you left everything. you had created a more private one, for your close and trusted friends to follow.

and you thought that nothing could really top that eventful day in england.

but it did.

you’re sat on toilet in on of the bathrooms, rae rubbing your back.

pregnant. it was clearly written on the test.

no fucking way.

in no ways were you ready to be a mother.

as a little kid, you had dreamt of being a mum, alongside a successful man who took responsibility.

you never would have seen yourself to be a mother alone, with the help of your bestfriend.

you never thought that you would be a mother, whose dad is someone who clearly doesn’t want anything to do with you.

rae stayed with you all the time. even through the gross vomit sessions in the morning, or all the time, in your case.

but you were in no way shape or form ready for a child. you had to raise a child on your own. even the thought of that had emotionally drained you.

weeks after you found out you were pregnant, you were significantly getting more moody, and rae knew that.

she made sure you ate well, slept well and kept up with eating vitamins each day. that was until, you couldn’t take it all anymore.

maybe it was the stress. well, it was the stress.

you blamed it all on the emotional toll the pregnancy took on you. your body was practically screaming for help. help that you need, but you weren’t in the right head space to offer the help to yourself.

it was a typically normal day for rae and you. besides rae screaming in her gaming room while streaming, it had been pretty quiet.

you felt queasy, but you pushed it off. it was normal for you nowadays. everything almost made you throw up. the look of something, the smell.

but on that day, it was a different type of feeling in your stomach.

one second, you were walking into the kitchen, trying to get some water, and the other, you were on the floor, in pain.

you screamed. this was the worst type of pain you’ve felt in your life. you screamed for anyone who could hear you. you were sure that even rae’s stream could hear you, but you didn’t care.

soon you heard multiple footsteps. one of your guards came to your aid before rae did. he supported your head on his lap, him sitting on the floor.

he told the other guard who came soon after he did to call the ambulance.

that was when you finally found out what was happening.

“holy shit, she’s bleeding.” rae repeated to herself.

you were bleeding? that wasn’t good, right? that meant bad things, doesn’t it?

you felt like you were floating, like your limbs were as light as a feather. that was because you were losing consciousness.

you lost it. you lost it and found out it was a boy.

now the two boys you love more than your life aren’t here with you, forever.

you cried for weeks, rae next to you, making sure you were still alive and eating. she was the only one that stayed by your side in real life. sure, your online friends did care about you, but they just couldn’t be there with you.

clay and nick had always been texting you, sometimes calling to try their luck, clay mostly. you knew they cared about you, and they wanted to make sure that you’re okay. but you felt embarrassed. you didn’t want to face anyone, even if people kept saying that you did nothing wrong.

apparently rae’s stream heard your scream, and that was how rae found out that you were in danger. she couldn’t hear through her headphones, but her chat kept spamming her about it, and that raised alarms.

they kept asking about the ‘mysterious girl screaming’ in rae’s stream. it was short lived, though. rae told them that she had a friend over and that they were injured, and that rested the chaos for a little.

you were sure that some people knew you were living with her. most of them were almost like detectives, after all.

you didn’t blame the stans. it wouldn’t take a genius to figure out that you would live with her, anyways.

since the awful day at the hospital, you have texted clay and nick. you wanted to tell them that you were okay, that you aren’t hurt, at least not physically anymore.

it didn’t take you long to start calling clay daily again. other than rae, you didn’t really have anyone. so you told clay.

it felt weird talking about a baby that used to be in you to someone whose bestfriend was the dad of. but he completely understood you. sure, he couldn’t say for experience, seeing as he clearly can’t get pregnant, but he supported you, made sure you let it all out to him.

you and clay grew close, almost bestfriends. although you and nick were close, he’s still in college, and that meant that he usually didn’t have time to talk to you as much as clay did, and you didn’t blame him. school can be a pain in the ass.

but you still made sure to never keep nick in the dark. as much as clay is one of your bestfriends, so is nick.

clay made sure never to talk about george to you, which deemed to be difficult since they had been friends for years. he had accidentally slipped his name out to you a couple times, but you were sure he didn’t meant to do that.

other than the usual “george has been sleeping like a log” and “he slept through the smp war.” you hadn’t heard anything else about him, but it seemed like he was doing well.

clay had told you about the bet.

“nick brought it up, but we didn’t think he was actually going to go through with it.” the floridian said.

you aren’t the type to hold grudges, not even if they did you really dirty, so you told clay that you were on the path of being fully healthy and that he didn’t need to apologise for his friend’s behaviour.

“are you ever going to come back?” he asks you in a facetime call. you knew exactly what he was talking about. he wanted to know if you’d ever come back on the internet.

you didn’t even know the answer yourself. you weren’t sure. so you told him that.

“maybe, maybe not. who knows.” and that was months ago.

you had plenty of time to heal, to get back on track. but nothing could top your pain of losing your child, that you never got to hold, to kiss, to spoil.

telling your mother about the loss of your baby was the hardest. she is a traditional woman, always telling you to get married before bearing children, but that didn’t mean she didn’t love the baby you were carrying in you.

she cried on the phone, sobbing, hiccupping. you wanted to hug her so bad, she even asked you when you’d come back, but you told her you needed time, but you’d be there soon.

for some reason, although you got maximum hours of sleep each day, you still felt exhausted. you consulted a doctor, but he told you that it was normal since your body is still fragile, but the exhaustion never really went away as months go by.

being bored at home, and hearing rae having fun made you feel lonely, it made you feel like you were left out. so you made the decision to come back. not to stream, but to appear in rae’s videos.

rae and the rest of the group welcomed you with open arms. they were caring and made sure you felt comfortable again, not stepping any boundaries. not that you cared, the public was bound to know everything soon enough.

so you did that.

you were playing proximity chat among us, with the usual people. at that point, you and the other nine people were still in the lobby, chatting, until corpse sounded out.

“what have you been doing nowadays?” harmless question, in your opinion.

you didn’t want to hide anything anymore, and rae knew what was about to happen.

“been having a lot of rest. doctor said that i’m still fragile.” you told corpse.

“are you sick?” toast asks. some people would’ve been offended at that question, or take it the wrong way, but you didn’t.

“actually, i suffered a miscarriage recently.” you told them honestly.

there was no awkward silence. immediately, everyone started apologising, saying “sorry for your loss.”

you brushed them off, telling them that it’s okay, that they didn’t offend you at all for asking that question.

“feels good to get it out my chest.” you told them, laughing at the end of that sentence.

“she hasn’t slept well at all, she really wanted to tell you guys.” rae told her

one by one, they all spoke to you, asked you if it was even okay that you all talked about it on streams. you told them that it had been your choice to tell people this way, and they had nothing to worry about.

on the other hand, it was tough for george. not at first, though. he thought it was going to be easy, having sex with a pretty, virgin girl and ditch her alone in a country she she hasn’t personally been to.

but that changed the moment she disappeared. the guilt never really hit george until people started bashing him on the internet.

at first, people were too focused on the girl. people discriminated you, called you a slut. they didn’t think that george was wrong at all, although he was the one who took the explicit photos and posted it.

but then, people, mostly woman had started to realise indeed how messed up it was.

george really couldn’t care that you “left.” but then people kept on commenting on his posts. specifically, they often left a comment saying “really bold of you to do that to a princess.”

at the start, he thought the comments meant that they couldn’t believe he did such terrible things to their princess, someone wholesome they cherished. he didn’t realise that his comments literally meant that you are a princess.

so he googled it. he wanted to know why people kept calling you ‘princess’ or ‘next on the throne’. he was curious, and he wasn’t expecting it all to be real.

when he googled your name, a huge google tab came out.

princess of saudi arabia.

this must be a typo, right? he couldn’t deny that you are indeed a pretty girl, he just couldn’t believe that he had done such things to someone so royal.

he never even thought that one day, he would score to talk to celebrities, let alone be able to be in bed with an actual princess.

so he doubted it.

but then he kept looking.

he looked at images of you. photos of you with a small tiara, next to what seemed to be the queen of saudi arabia, wearing a long, modest emerald gown. the photo was taken when the king had a birthday.

picture after picture, he started to doubt his thoughts even more.

he couldn’t lie, your face really fit the title. if he really thought about it, your existence screamed royalty. the way you spoke, your poise, the way you strut in a hallway and was able to wow a crowd without trying.

george always assumed that people only stared at you in public because of how beautiful you are. he never really realised it all until now.

usually, guys can be insecure when they hear rude comments about how a lanky man is able to get a beautiful, confident woman. but to george, he felt even more egoistical. he used you, truly like a trophy wife.

that was until he really realised.

now, he thinks that everything he did was just a plain asshole move, not saying it isn’t if he did it to any other normal girl.

“i fucking messed up” he thought to himself, reading press conferences about your princess title.

if he thought he messed up then, wait till he found out you were pregnant, and then later losing it.

he felt like he was in a fever dream. it felt like a written book, not real life.

he kept slapping himself, pinching himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. it all felt unreal. so many things were happening.

now, he’s more concerned than guilty. he wanted to know if you’re okay. even he felt like he can’t cope with the information he was given, how would you feel?

furthermore, he kept reading theories that the scream in the background of valkyrae’s stream was yours. had you lost the baby there? had you lost his baby there?

he called clay and nick. he wanted to double check. it was all a lot to handle, knowing you’re a princess and a mother in the same week.

nick screamed at him on discord for hours, literally. george knew clay was just as mad, just as disappointed. he just didn’t have the energy to say it all, even though all he wanted to do was fly to england and beat george up.

although it took george a while to realise everything he did was messed up, he came to. and he really did want to contact you. but really, anyone in your position wouldn’t even glance at his name twice after what he did.

he was happy that you were looking healthy on rae’s stream. although you weren’t really ready to stream on your own again and many people understood that, and never pushed you.

but whenever he saw you sometimes on rae’s facecam, he could see that pain, deeply hidden in your eyes. you were trying to cover up the fact that you were still trying to heal.

CLAY’S POV

it was infuriating to see george not really giving a shit at first, and then changing to a new man. it took you to tell the world about your lost child for him to own up to his mistakes.

nick and i had been friends with him for years, it takes a lot to just dump a friend, a close one at that. so we did what we could, help him wake up from this “dream” he’s in.

that didn’t mean we weren’t mad at him still.

if he didn’t want to own up, i will.

the subsequent years came by and went really quickly. people were starting to forget the drama that you and george were in. people soon became uninterested about it, but still stayed with you, encouraging you to heal slowly and take your time.

that was what you liked about the internet. granted, some people can be mean, but the people who supported you were the ones that helped you keep going, helped you find a reason to wake up in the morning.

no, you’d never forget that you lost a child, and you were reminded by the people on the internet who made it a pact to make sure george never forgot that too.

george did end up talking to you a couple years ago. you accepted his apology, but not him. you were sure he only wanted to apologise after knowing that you were the next in the throne.

speaking of throne, you were back in the castle. not permanently, but you visited often. you still lived with rae, and you had actually started streaming on your own again a few months before george reached out to you.

clay and nick had been supportive of you since the start, still clearly apologetic even though you told him that you had forgotten about it and that it hadn’t even been their fault in the first place.

but they were persistent, clay more than nick since nick was still very busy with college. you loved the two of them and considered them to be one of your best friends, aside from rae.

GEORGE’S POV

it was difficult. i felt like i had no shame to just text her one day after being gone for so long. but i actually felt bad. i know it was a rocky start.

i had been so focused on winning the bet and not wanting to be called a pussy from my friends that i disregarded you, your feelings.

i knew from the start that you had been a great girl. you were just so sweet to everyone you meet, even strangers. it warmed my heart, it made me feel safe to be around you all the time.

not that i can say that right now anyways, i didn’t have the right at all, after what i did to you.

i don’t know what love is, given the fact that multiple girls had left me before this. i asked myself often if what i felt for my exes were actually love, or had i just been desperate.

but i felt like when i was with you, it had been love, or close enough.

but i couldn’t just burst it out one day that i love you, we weren’t really even dating.

given that you had been pure, prior to me, it was shocking to see you so open, so welcoming to me. it was like you had known me forever, that you trusted me.

and i took advantage of that, and later i got the consequences.

i suffered the consequences. i see him with you. and i see that you’re happier with him. if it was any other guy, i think it would hurt less.

but it was my own best friend. it was clay.

all the instagram photos you post, his face blurred or covered, or when he posts a photo of you, it all hurt.

i started the fall for you, for your genuine heart, and when i finally decide to do something about it, someone else had done it before me.

deep down, i knew that clay would’ve been the better choice for you anyway. but it still hurt me. hearing his voice coming from behind you when you stream without your facecam.

everyone was so supportive of you and clay, they’re obviously happy that you found someone who treats you better, even i knew that.

i wished i hadn’t taken you for granted, i wish i hadn’t listened to the stupid voice in my head reminding that you were all just a bet, that i wouldn’t love you like you think i would.

i felt left out.

a while ago, you were in florida with nick and your boyfriend, clay. it stung to see nick and you streaming so happily, not remembering me.

but i deserved it. and i knew you deserve to be happy, after everything i did to you.

but that didn’t compare to the pain i felt now, a year later, seeing photos of clay and you, his face turned from the camera, facing you. he was down on one knee, proposing.

and although you were crying and your hands covered the bottom half of your face, i could see how happy you are, i could see the amount of love you held for clay.

how i wish i had done things a little more differently.

#georgenotfound #georgenotfound x reader #georgenotfound fanfic #georgenotfound imagine #georgenotfound imagines #dream imagine #dream imagines #dreamwastaken imagines

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naynay5155 · 3 years

Text

Sometimes I despise C!Tommy, god. Sometimes I remember how shitty of a person he is in canon and I just wanna implode. Because he never really gets punished for regularly being a shitty person.

The punishments he goes through are never because of his bad actions. He never gets it pointed out to him how was and still is, lowkey abusing C!Tubbo. He never gets called out on the general anti-socialness he displays around pretty much everyone. He never gets called out for his frequent mistreatment of Jack or Niki or Fundy. He just... gets away with that.

The "punishments" he does get are never because he's being an asshole and because he needs to become a better person. They are just straight up abuse at the hands of serveral trusted adults in his life. And this abuse doesn't actually help him anyway because it's abuse of course it wouldn't.

So, when he gets put through bad shit, and anyone has anything to say in regards to him being really shitty as a person, the fandom won't understand, because C!Tommy has the Halo Effect after a full year of gaining so many shields.

The First shield is the fact that he's the protagonist in a Action & Adventure story, making it so that the audience automatically wants to root for him.

The Second shield is that he is framed as being the underdog, and has been from the start. This is as a result of the roleplay originally starting as basically a Hamilton Parody, where C!Tommy was framed as this "Spunky and larger than life eager young man". And he still is veiwed like that by the audidence, even when he's grown past that and arguably doesn't count as being and underdog anymore.

The Third shield is him being played by a 16 to 17 year old Minecraft Youtuber, which gives people the excuse to play the age card to handwave all his actions. If Tommy, who is playing him, is 16 or 17, than to a lot of people that's all the reason they need to assume C!Tommy is also 16 to 17. And I can't say I blame them, the timeline is nonexistent.

The Fourth shield is the fact that he is the most popular Content Creator in the entire series, due to the viewer count he gets, the dedicated audience of young people, and the regular spotlight the writing gives him. He is, 100%, the most popular character, with only maybe like, C!Ranboo and C!Wilbur and C!Techno beating him out of that. That is like, three out of the 30+ who canonically exist on the server. When you can pull 630,000 Live Viewers on Twitch.tv of all places over Minecraft, you are fucking huge. That creates a very loyal fanbase.

The Fifth shield is him being an abuse victim. Similar to him because mostly seen in the fandom as a minor and as a result getting away with a lot, C!Tommy being an Abuse Victim and Mentally Ill coded makes it so that his shitty actions can be handwaved away. No matter how severe his shittiness is, or what exactly has happened you can just say, "Well, he's clearly traumatized cut him some slack!" This can be done even when Tommy hasn't properly taken it upon himself to play C!Tommy as traumatized consistently.

The Sixth shield is also, arguably, the fact that C!Tommy is portrayed as a Straight, White, Cis Man. You cannot tell me that if C!Tommy was canonically a girl, that the gaming community wouldn't have dogpiled on her and made fun of her and called her annoying for no reason. Not with the way Niki is treated. The character gets given so much more importance and respect in comparison to some other people, like Eret, Niki, Ponk. And I don't think that's just a coincidence.

The Seventh shield, is that CC!Tommy's entire brand is being funny. To the point where it leaks into his roleplay portrayal, and means that a lot of the shitty things that C!Tommy does end up being framed through the lens of humour. Which means the impact and effect of his bad actions do not hold weight and are taken way less seriously than when something happens to C!Tommy himself. There is a reason why most people don't think much of C!Jack Manifold because being basically just a clown to be mocked.

All this stuff prevents a lot of very obvious stuff in this roleplay from getting talked about. So many people would rather focus on headcanons and made up lore, that when the time actually comes to point the finger at C!Tommy and say "Hey, this guy is a bad person," so many people get confused or up in arms because they weren't thinking that C!Tommy being a bad person was possible.

When it gets to the point where you have people thinking C!Tommy and Ghostbur were totally friends with no issues at all, you know you have a problem. Because C!Tommy canonically treated Ghostbur like shit and was not really treating him well at all. C!Tommy regularly trigger and upset Ghostbur, blaming him for the actions of C!Wilbur even when he knew it was pointless and hurt him. He hung around him a lot, but its obvious he clung to Ghostbur as a way to still maintain the memories of "Good Wilbur" rather than because Ghostbur was good on his own merits. He would regularly guilt trip him, and seemed completely indifferent to how his actions and words hurt Ghostbur for a long while.

This is not good, there were a lotta problems there, and they should be addressed as the problems they are, otherwise you miss out on proper understanding of C!Tommy's character.

And this misinterpretation of Tommy's character is as much a fault of the writing of the DreamSMP as it is the biased Fandom's.

Because how are the audience supposed to know that C!Tommy isn't really a good person, when he never faces narrative consequences, his issues are never handled and talked about, he gets away with everything, and we're too busy focusing on the "Worse" people, like C!Wilbur and C!Dream, to actually talk about C!Tommy?

#dream smp critical #dsmp critical #negative #negativity #dreamsmp #dream smp #dreamsmp roleplay #what the hell dreamsmp writers #c!tommy #criticism #critical dsmp

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thotsforvillainrights · 3 years

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Hello villain izuku father anon here! Thank u for loving my idea. I mean you can still write the one shot without izuku, i actually just wanted the villains reaction to that. I'm sorry if i didn't describe that right! Still thank u for answering and loving my idea!♡ Again have a nice day/night!

(Its been sooooo long oh gosh! Was it the reader being AFO’s child and the others reacting to it? I think that was it. I’m gonna go about that, and sorry for the long wait!!!!)

~Y/N is AFO’s Child~ ~How the LOV reacts~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

-Shigaraki: He already knew. You two have met on more than one occasion but it wasn’t too much often. You’re not really distant with your dad, but you have a life to live so you never visited too much (especially since he was deep in villainy). The few times that you did visit him, you spent a little time with Tomura before he hit the age of 15 and became an angsty teenager locked in his room playing hours upon hours of Minecraft. You still see him as a little brother and he somewhat considers you a sibling as well.

-Kurogiri: Just like Tomura, he already knew as well. I mean, he spent a great deal of life employed under AFO and of course he meets you many times as well. You two spend a good amount of time together when you visit since you enjoy his company. He’s quiet but good at conversation and even better with listening. Sometimes you might feel bad for always venting to him when you’d visit your grandpa, but he was a good friend so it couldn’t be helped. And man does he know how to keep a secret too!

-Toga: “What??? That old man?!” She’s really surprised since you don’t really act much like him and you don’t really resemble him either. You reassure her that he’s your dad (whether by blood, or adoption depending on the reader). So then Toga grills you on the big boss because she’s curious to see what life was like with him. She won’t bring it up in front of him the next time she sees him either.

-Dabi: “You’re related to the big guy? Couldn’t tell at first since he looks like a wrinkly testicle and all.” Dabi teases as he sits at the bar, and you smack him playfully. “Hey, he can be pretty awful sometimes, but he’s still my dad. Watch it, bacon bits.” You threaten him with a smirk and he scoffs. Dabi doesn’t really care to be honest with you. To him, being related to AFO is a lot less worse that being related to his father as he would put it.

-Spinner: He just kinda chokes on his food a little bit before looking at you with a wide mouth. You laugh at him and shake your head. “WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHING!?” You shrug it off and keep playing video games. “Why didn’t anyone ask me?” Spinner just kinda sits there dumfounded while you tap away at the keyboard and swivel the mouse around as you game. It’s gonna take him some time to believe it.

-Magne: She wants you to tell her everything (much like Toga did) because she’s curious about things now. She’s a little annoyed since you never said anything but you figure it wasn’t a big deal. You do manage to find a little comfort and telling her about some of the kinder moments you shared with AFO. The moments when he’s not a wanted villain but a father instead. The moments when you two would try to watch a movie together, or when he plays chess with you while drinking tea. Sometimes he wires you money when needed, but you don’t like asking for his help so you don’t say it often.

-Twice: He’s a little confused but he also doesn’t see how this affects your friendship at all so it’s okay. I mean it’s a cool random fact for him to have learned but beside that, it really has nothing much to do with him. The only issue would be if he were to ever end up dating you. THEN it might seem to come up as an issue, but for now things are relatively normal between you two.

-Muscular: “Okay? And?” On the outside he plays it off like it doesn’t matter but on the inside, he’s having a hard time trying to grasp whether or not you’re fucking with him. He’s got like one braincell and that bitch is on vacation right now. He doesn’t want to ask anyone for help so he’ll deadass steal your phone when you aren’t looking and scroll through it until he realizes you’re telling the truth. By then it’s too late because you catch him with your phone and that’s death penalty in your books. Let’s hope you didn’t inherit AFO’s quirk for muscular’s sake...

-Moonfish: “???” He is confused but rolls with it. You may notice him keeping a bit of a distance from now on since he relates you to basically being a bit of royalty. He knows to make sure not to rub you the wrong way or else his head could be on the chopping block. Lucky for him, you really wouldn’t ever call your father for help like that because you could handle it yourself...and also because you’d never hear the end of his lecturing you

-Mustard: Tries to get on your good side even if you aren’t affiliated much with the LOV. He does it in the hopes of rising within the league/vanguard action squad ranks. You simply roll your eyes at this and continue on with everyday life. You don’t have the time to explain to him that befriending you wouldn’t benefit a single thing since you don’t get mixed up with your dad’s little villainy group. Still, you watch him exhaust himself trying because it’s funny lol

-Compress: He has to admit it surprised him a little bit since he had never even heard of it...and he knew a LOT about All for one! Then he figures out that you weren’t talked about or even mentioned as a way to protect your safety. IT all makes a lot more sense that way of course. Aside from all of this, he never wavers with the amount of respect he offers you. It doesn’t change and you’re thankful he treats you the same as usual instead of changing himself around you after the news. Sometimes you wonder if he really should’ve been a villain in the first place.

»—————————–———————————————————–✄

Instagram: @pastelbattydraws & @pastelbattystore

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRNMJH7vHL7APNobUykhK4w?view_as=subscriber

#afo #all for one #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #lov #league of villains

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pikaflute · 3 years

Text

hi, sudafed cleared my sinuses long enough to think so here’s a giant post about most of my charles headcanons

Playlist

OH btw here’s my 4 hour and 23 minute playlist for Charles. Enjoy. Yes I know I’m insane: https://open.spotify.com/user/pikaflute24/playlist/4DBxaaxbqsmJt9Fvl8AgwZ?si=OcXlYCdFRzOhuKa4p_HdUQ

General Headcanons

He was born November 24 1965. He’s currently 56, but I usually write him in his late 40s in most fanfic and content I make. So there’s this middle aged man....

He has hazel eyes. Sometimes they look green, sometimes brown. Sometimes they’ll be white but that’s when he’s using his magic so mind your business

Gear brand over his heart >:)c

:) i think he has piercings and tattoos, a skull (dead man teehee) on his upper arm, a tattoo of a date (the date pickles and him first met TEEHEE) on his left arm also has a tattoo on his arm of the day he “died” on his right. had his ears pierced when he was a teen.

Has a sweet tooth so hard. Smuggles in treats into the drawers of his desk just to snack on during the day and has a mini fridge just filled with ice cream and also sorts of other goodies. He loves brownies and cookies the most

Likes to work out and keep himself in shape. it takes his mind off of stressful things like work and the boys, and just take his morning practice sparring and doing various exercises in the mordhaus gym.

he’s uh also very flexible so he does yoga a lot when he exercises. don’t. look too deep into that

cannot cook to save his life. he almost burned mordhaus down trying to make himself a sandwich

he can play guitar! he used to play it more often when he was younger but he rarely has the time to play it nowadays. when he does get to play it, it’s usually in private (and mainly songs by dethklok), or it’s to show off to a certain lead guitarist that yes he is playing that solo wrong

he’s ambidextrous but prefers using his right hand. he’ll use his left hand to spar in order to go easy on his opponents because hes a smug cunt

he’s 5′7 but intimidation factor adds a couple inches doesn’t it

has a scorpion named princess as a pet. he lets her sit on his desk sometimes and it scares the shit out of dethklok which makes charles laugh on the inside

hes also a cat person. one time toki brought a cat home and it settled on charles’ lap and he almost cried

loves to be a smug asshole and relishes in it. will not take shit from anyone, especially from some asshole who is trying to pull one over on him

he has no idea how social media works at all. will print memes out to show to dethklok, he’s very fond of cat memes specifically (i can has cheeseburger type beat)

he has no idea what any internet memes means he isn’t going to start learning. he is going to misuse internet phrases. are you boys, ah, finding the imposter? [cue five groans from dethklok]

knows a lot of languages. not a comprehensive list but: french, swedish, norwegian, spanish, italian, japanese, chinese, german, russian and korean

is very competitive. scarily competitive. once he starts losing in smash or mario kart all hell will break lose

very bad at showing emotions or affection, when he gets compliments he gets all red and quiet and mumbles a thank you.

weird about being touched as well and will usually avoid it unless it’s with someone he trusts

speaking of, his love language is acts of service :)c

hates being called charlie or chuck, unless the right person calls him it ;)

he’s autistic. was nonverbal for most of his life and only talked to certain people, or anyone at all. he stims with his hands and uses his pens to fidget.

has a collection of novelty socks. he likes the ones that have polka dots or stripes

sleeps with a garfield plushie he had since he was younger. it helps him with the nightmares

when any of the boys need help sleeping (usually toki or pickles), he’ll sleep with them in his bed. after dying he had trouble sleeping some nights, so dethklok returned the favor and all piled up in his bed and helped him sleep. he didnt have nightmares after that night

hes nearsighted, and prefers to wear glasses over contacts

lactose intolerant, hes still eating mac n cheese and paying the price

metalhead but pretends to not be just to mess with his boys

crippling addiction to match 3 games. also loves to play minecraft.

overly self sacrificial. puts ones he love needs before his own, results in himself being very isolated and distant from those he cares about because he’s afraid of hurting them

his favorite colors are black and purple

coffee kinda guy. black coffee or bust

has a lot of cute novelty mugs to put his coffee in. he ones from places where dethklok tours, dethklok official ones (the only two that aren’t adorned with spikes), some cat themed ones, a couple that have ties and math references, and one from his boys that says “most brutal manager”. he drinks out of that last one the most

he has a couple of grey hairs and wrinkles, but he keeps them because they remind him that he’s human. also pickles said old men were hot but you didnt hear that from me

likes to play chess but he can never find a good opponent. all the klokateers are too scared if they win and dethklok is too distracted to ever play with him or they end up losing to quickly if charles plays against them

really wants kids. he babies his sister’s sons and daughters a TON (uncle charles always brings the best gifts :) ) and also treats toki like his own son in a way. toki doesnt mind, he really appreciates the love

speaking of, toki does call charles dad once and it makes charles cry for like. a week and a half

his favorite dethklok song is the gears :)

he likes to collect knives as a side hobby, his favorite of his collection is a sleek black one with skulls on the handle

he has a motorcycle and likes to drive it around sometimes to just be alone with himself. it’s all black with a red gear on it

lightweight but only if he drinks the amount dethklok drinks. can hold his alcohol fairly well if he drinks like a sensible human, prefers brandy and wine

he can smoke cigars to be sexy for me and me ONLY

likes to read in his spare time. he likes mystery novels and science fiction

he has soft spot for cheesy sitcoms, they’re his guilty pleasure

his favorite youtuber is lockpickinglawyer. yours should be too

usually sleeps in only his boxers but will wear a shirt if its’s cold. he tends to sleep on his side (also wants to be the little spoon when cuddled but he will never admit that)

takes vacations sometimes away from the boys despite his worry that something will go wrong (it will!). many of his vacations are usually going to visit his family and going to the shore with them, or travelling to somewhere new for a change (cue charles being a yakuza substory on his one vacation per year)

he can sew pretty well. learned from his mom and used to sew the whole his sister use to put through her soccer uniform.

can also do makeup, and usually does it for one of the boys of there’s no one else around to help

bites his lip when he’s nervous. which is a lot

likes chococat and gudetama. he’s a man of tastes

laughs really loud if you catch him off guard. he snorts sometimes too. he’s embarrassed by it, but i think its’ cute

loves law and order obviously

he likes men

has a lot of pent up rage. very good at compressing it. sometimes

as high priest, he stays up very late trying to decipher the ancient prophecies that dethklok needed to fulfill. he doesnt sleep very much when he starts out because he misses home, so the band makes him come back (or else)

also as high priest he becomes more intune with magic granted to him after he died and he mainly uses his magic to protect his boys when they go back to being a band. also to fuck with them

the band he managed before dethklok was a band named savior who said they were a metal band with a unique sound, but that unique sound was actually just being a christian metal band that were bad at playing music. they also treated charles like shit and blamed him for them doing so poorly with sales and shows. had an unfortunate “accident” with a tour bus after charles had enough of their attitude towards him. he denies he had anything to do with it (he did.)

Family/Childhood

He’s the baby of the family. Spoiled rotten to the max. He doesn’t admit it though but whenever he comes home you know he abuses the “:)c im the favorite” card

He has 4 older sisters: Caroline who is a high school civics teacher, Cynthia who is a librarian, Callie who is a coach for a soccer team, and Charlotte who is a lawyer/manager who manages Ladyklok, which gets awkward (and funny) when Abigail starts dating the lead singer Natalie

charles is actually one of the tallest in his family. his dad is 6’1 and his older sister Callie is 5’11. cynthia is 5’6, caroline is 5’6, and his mom and charlotte are 5’5.

his mom is a doctor and his dad is an accountant. his mom’s name is giovanna and his dad’s name is elijah

caroline is the oldest sister, followed by cynthia, callie, charlotte then charles.

Charlotte and Charles are sworn enemies since they were born on the same day a year apart and basically have the same job. They do love each other though

His father calls him Charles. Caroline and Cynthia call him Charlie. Callie calls him Chuck. Charlotte calls him Charles (derogatory). His mom calls him a whole slew of nicknames that she made up when he was young (she calls him cheese ball and he turns red)

caroline has a wife (lauren who is a chef) and two kids (evan and shelby)

cynthia is dating a coworker (viola)

callie has a husband (john who is a stay at home dad) and they have three kids (brenda, melissa, and jeff)

charlotte is dating ladyklok (and abigail). this is a weird flex on charles i think.

He had a race car bed when he was like 5

He also was also one of those kids at family game night. He almost killed Cynthia over a game of monopoly

Always got to lick the spoon first after his mom baked brownies

He grew up in North Jersey (derogatory) (also yes im projecting state shot)

He’s also Italian (derogatory)

He got bullied in middle school for a little bit but once his older sisters found out, oh boy did all hell break loose

Was in band in high school. He played flute (DONT TALK TO ME I LIKE PROJECTING), he was of course a soloist and incredibly smug about it

Took gymnastics as a kid. Can do a backflip on command. Also very flexible.

First manager gig was helping his sisters sell girl scout cookies. They raked in a lot of profits when baby bro was behind the scenes. His cut was eating thin mints for free

Loved Star Trek when he was a kid

Was incredibly gifted, and taught himself to read at a young age. didn’t talk that much though

was always sick when he was little. he would always get sinus infections and colds if someone even sneezed weird

was in mock trial in high school. one guy on his team was a jerk to him so charles made it a point to be this poor kid’s nemesis

was on the student council, treasurer of course.

was also in nhs, and he was treasurer there too

was that kid who insisted on doing the group project by himself because he didn’t want to wait on anyone to finish their part

was super rowdy as a kid, always got into trouble but his mom was a little lenient of punishment (hes a mommas boy)

when he was like super young he bit people cause he was just a little monster (charles' sisters: mom charles is biting again. charles, biting one of them: im not :/ sheesh)

wanted to be a lawyer since he was 7

put his own siblings and parents on trial and would win every trial and would always get the last cookie or a higher allowance

he shared his room with his sister Charlotte and they would set up a pillow fort on one of the beds and stay up late reading together

loved going to the beach as a kid, his mom still has his collection of shells from the beach

on the boardwalk, he would dominate at claw machines anad carnival games. he won a bunch of plushies from himself (and his sisters obviously)

his dad and him have a super close bond. they watched star trek together and also like to watch how the stock market would do. his dad was also sometimes the judge in charles’ mock trials at home

they were very supportive when he came out as gay, he was also the first of his sibilings to come out of the closet

College

Got his masters in business management at rutgers and a JD (law degree) from seton hall law.

Started college when he was 18 (1983) and ended college when he was 26 (1991)

Wasn’t a party guy. Never got invited to many, but he never went unless a certain redhead was in town

Sustained himself off of ramen, coffee, and SSRIs to get his masters (hey man i feel ya)

Did weed like three times. Three of those times were because of, you guessed it, a certain redhead

Speaking of, his first time having sex was in his dorm with Pickles. Pickles also kicked him off of the bed (those beds are fucking tiny) while they slept, and almost burned Charles’ dorm down trying to make toast the next morning

Absolute did not do essays until the night before. Bad habit that made it’s way into Dethklok managing when he’s forced to write a legal brief before 12 am.

Loved calculus 2 for some reason. Nerd

Had a mullet. Pickles thought it was hot (still is) while Charles would rather die than remember anything about that horrid hairdo

Also went through his goth/emo phase while in Law School. He stuck out amongst the sea of sweater vests and polo shirts

Was in a band with his fellow college bandmates. The band was called Habeas Corpses and he was the lead singer who also played guitar. Their sound was kind of similar to TWRP’s first two EPs (The Device and 2nite). they had a grunge aesthetic, and yes charles dyed his mullet black (with a purple streak), for the band.

his bandmates were all fellow law students. dillan was on drums, margaret was their bass guitar, and nick was their keyboardist. all three of them also got tutored by charles while in law school. they are still best friends and write to each other sometimes

Was on the debate team, but uh kicked off due to be very competitive (he threatened to punch the opposing debater)

Was also in the chess club, also kicked off for being too competitive (lunged at a kid for cheating)

After being kicked from the two previous clubs, he joined fencing, his very competitive nature made him the best in the state

nick (the guy in charles’ band) was charles’ roommate the whole time they were in college. they may or may not have had a brief relationship before they realized they would be better as friends

nick also has a nes and charles loved to played zelda and wrote an entire guide for himself because he’s was that into the game (nerd)

occasionally would be found sleeping in the library on campus

wanted to be an RA but the resident association at his schools thought he was a little much. charles took this as a compliment

worked out a lot between studying and classes. a lot of jocks underestimated him because of his size but charles was just :) [casually lifts something heavy]

a lot of fellow classmates thought he was super cool cause of the leather he wore, and how cool and quiet he was, too bad they didnt know he was a huge nerd

tried skateboarding. once.

had a cadillac that barely started and drove like a piece of shit but that was charles’ baby

pickles tried to have sex with charles in said car btw, charles almost killed him for even daring to suggest to tarnish his beautiful baby

has damaged his back permanently because of all the books he used to carry around in his crappy back pack

did some modelling for one of his friends in college. he was very attractive and got some other modelling job through it. he tries to hide that from the boys in the future because he thinks it’s embarrassing

Relationship with Dethklok

Pickles - he’s known the drummer the longest out of any other member, and if you couldn’t tell by now, he had a brief relationship with the drummer back in the 80s (and maybe also still has a crush on him :)). charles respects and admires pickles’ talent as a musician and sometimes they play together when they have time alone. he tries to be there when pickles has a relapse in either emotions with his family or something else, but still tries to maintain a distance because he thinks that pickles doesn’t feel the same as he did in the 80s. (he does btw). nothing could break the bond these two share. not even death

Nathan - understands nathan’s quiet nature (nonverbal kings!) and strive for perfection in everything dethklok creates because he is the same way. their similarities allow them to connect on a level that allows nathan to open up about his feelings that he likes to lock away. nathan also gets charles to open his feelings up and actually care for himself for once in his damn life. charles also helps nathan with the depression he develops after charles dies and how to deal with it despite it being not brutal. nathan wants to give back and he does by becoming one of charles’ closest friends (and maybe even lovers hehehe)

Toki - charles has taken it upon himself to be toki’s father figure after seeing the way toki’s family has left him for essentially dead. ever since toki joined the band, charles has made it a point to be there for him whenever he needed it. even if it meant spending late nights reading to toki or sleeping over in toki’s room to help him sleep, he’ll do it. he blames himself for toki’s disappearance but toki assures him that he did the best he could. toki calls him dad a lot after doomstar. it makes charles cry.

Skwisgaar - unstoppable asshole meets immovable object. skwisgaar sees himself above everyone else like he does with the other dethklok members but with charles, skwisgaar knows that charles isn’t intimidated by him nor will he bow to the guitar god in anyway. this develops a game of cat and mouse between the two, with skwisgaar trying to no subtly push charles’ buttons and to see what makes him ticks, while charles resist him at every turn with a smug ‘:) is that all you got’ and it delights him to finally see the guitarist squirm under pressure.

Murderface - at first the two are very. distant to say the least. murderface used to see charles as unemotional robot and charles was fine with that and accepted the distance. overtime however, and especially after charles died, murderface warmed up to charles confiding in him things he hasn’t told the band, mainly things about his insecurities because charles is ‘fucking smart with crap like this’. and charles helps him and is happy to see him work out his problems and not bottle them anymore like the rest of his bandmates. charles also enjoys murderface’s company as a friend as well. and….he’s gonna help murderface the most with the whole traitor stuff too.

Abigail - mlm and wlw hostility. but seriously they’re good buds. he sympathizes with having to deal the moronic actions of dethklok on a daily basis and also thinks she’s really intelligent and overall fun to hang out with. they take lunch breaks frequently together and like to make fun of people at dethklok dinners together as a fun activity together. abigail will bully his ass once she finds out she’s dating charles’ sister and WILL bring up those baby pictures to get a higher raise thank you very much

Knubbler - can you say coworker besties! like abigail, he gets along because they both have to deal with dethklok being, well dethklok, but with knubbler, charles can relax a little more. the two cause problems on purpose just because they can. the two are also close friends and knubbler tries to get charles to relax for once in his life, and despite charles protests and objections, he sometimes caves and hands out with his friend (maybe boyfriend OOOOO who knows)

Sex Headcanons (IM SORRY)

um maybe he can have a giant dick (10 inches for me), it do be swinging though

daddy kink (everyone stay on this side, ill take care of him….come to daddy ;)c)

likes to do roleplay. he has a lot of costumes prepared for when his partner wants to do a scene with him

likes to bite and be bitten during sex. after a very long night, he’ll be covered in bite marks, it’s kinda hot

no gag reflex ;) he likes to deepthroat but good luck trying to get him to go down on you without him teasing

remember how i said he was flexible like eight times? yeah he uh, uses that a lot to his advantage. likes being fucked in weird positions because of it

the suit stays on during sex

he likes topping because he likes to be in control of everything he does all the time, but really wants to be told what to do sometimes and will let those he trusts do that for him

he has a dick piercing i know it

he's a very busy man, so he relies on his huge collection of toys he keeps in his bedroom and office

really good with his hands. as soon as those hands are on you, its game over

he loves to do it on his desk, makes him feel powerful. when he gets blown under his desk, it really takes all of his willpower to not cum immediately

really sensitive in weird places, specifically his ears

he likes to cuddle after sex, hes the little spoon :)

likes to be tied up, sometimes he’ll get tied up under his suit

mating press and riding are his favorite positions, giving and receiving

size queen, likes large toys and well ;)

has a private room that he sometimes goes to relieve stress, it has a fucking machine that he likes to use often when his job gets too stressful

he’s sucking people off at the klokateer glory hole, he’s uh, very good at what he does

likes to be spanked and like to spank

uses collars and leashes

maybe the klokateers can fuck him, if they’re good ;)

freeballing

likes cum on his face but doesn't seem to realize that means he’ll get cum on his glasses and will need to clean them

he can wear a chastity belt :) for me

likes being came in but will still complain about being gross after

pretty much up for anything, he’s not picky, he just wants to be in control and get off

#metalocalypse #charles foster offdensen

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keyofjetwolf · 4 years

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GIFTENING Bonus Rounds

For each category, I included a “bonus round” question. YOU GUYS KILLED IT. I loved all the answers, but listed below are some of my particular favourites.

Haruka Tenoh is trapped in the wrong anime! Which would you have her visit next?

I want her to earth shake Kyubey out of existence, please and thank you

My bride is a mermaid. She can relate. :P

i think she would THRIVE in bodacious space pirates. gay teenage space pirates whose job is to dress up, be Dramatic, and rob the wealthy??? that shit is RIGHT up her alley

Hamtaro

Princess Tutu - where the world is finally as dramatic as her

PGSM (and Michiru is trapped with her, for REASONS)

Pokemon because everyone deserves to be happy

Any moe-style series so hijinks can ensue at her being baffled by everyone's ages

1960's Speed Racer

is is this a captcha or something i missed oh god

Free! so she can be indifferent to all the hot men and slightly uncomfortable because she still can't swim.

Stick Haruka in a Gundam!

Dump her in Pretear or one of the Precures! It would be hilarious! She's never in the genre she wants to be!

Revolutionary Girl Utena, so she can be offended by misuse of roses.

Initial D, she will out-drive and out-drift all those guys and steal all their girls.

Evangelion. I would feel bad to watch her suffer, but it would be so, so funny for her to be the comparatively most normal person around.

Yakitake Japan! SO SHE CAN HAVE A SNACK OF DELICIOUS RIDICULOUS BREAD BEFORE THE NEXT INTERDIMENSIONAL ANIME STORM WHISKS HER AWAY.

The Holograms or the Misfits? DISCUSS

Holograms

both? both. BOTH IS GOOD

misfits bc Evil Ladies Hot

Steven and the stevens

Misfits. How dare you make us try to think about anything in our lives.

Both, you mad fool. Those combined songs were the best.

The Misfits, their songs are better

The Misgrams: A group of girls who form a singing telegram start up company, but constantly deliver the telegrams to the wrong people.

kimber & stormer

Neither. Limp Lizards all the way. BROKEN GLASS.

I do not know what these things are

Misfits because guitar motorcycle

The Isle of Misfit Holograms

Holograms is just arguably better

I mean, I’m told the Misfits’ songs are better, but my true answer is the band Kimber and Stormer made in that big gay episode you liveblogged (checks) almost four years ago.

I've no idea what these words mean and I hope this does not make me TOO uncool.

this is about jem, right? right?? im hip i swear

Misfits, because Jasper is a member apparently

I don't know from Jem, but I mean...I certainly prefer holographic material to Glenn Danzig? So I guess there's your answer ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The Stingers

LIMP LIZARDS FOREVER

Senshi Band

You can make me liveblog a full series of any show you want! You also hate me. What do you have me watch?

Pick a GoT rip-off, any GoT rip-off

The Bachelor?

The Bachelor :(

depends on how much i hate you, but....probably the bachelor. quantity AND lack of quality

Critical role, it would take forever

If I were a horrible person who sought only malice? Big Bang Theory. Entire series.

Toddlers and Tiaras

The Mandalorian - Disney would come after you and kill keyofjetwolf just as dead as keyofnik. We would all be very sad, you would have to go through a second round of restoring things to a new tumblr account, and your organizational heart would weep over adding yet another hosting site out of chronological order.

You are liveblogging Eva, and must discuss in full detail Shinji's emotional state at all times.

Hannity & Colmes

The Kardashians. And all of their spin offs. *kisses*

The price is right

the bachelor

Probably something with lots of romance and no friendships. Soap operas are like that, right? My college roommate used to watch General Young Light Restless Hospital of Our Lives (which one had Like and Laura?) And it was torture.

One Piece, because it's over 900 episodes so you could maybe do 10% before you die, also you will hate how the women are treated most of the time.

Fushigi Yuugi. Not only do you hate it but it also comes with you squirming when you admit to watching the whole thing. ;)

Plus belle la vie. It's an ongoing French soap opera that has been airing five days a week since 2004, they're nearing their 4000th episode and there's no end in sight. Imagine all those hours upon hours submerged in French drama, mwahahaha!!

The Bachelor. Or the Bachelorette, maybe - more straight dudes in that.

The Young and the Restless - IT IS THE LIVEBLOG THAT NEVER ENDS. IT WOULD OUTLAST THE INTERNET.

The entirety of the Bachelor franchise.

You can only play one game for the rest of your life. Which game would it be and why?

Kingdom Hearts Complete Collection. A) I love them. B) I beat the system and get like 10 games instead of one.

Gemcraft. This game actually takes a lifetime to finish.

Hatoful Boyfriend. It is the best game ever created. Feel it in your heart.

that's a mean question and you can't make me answer it

Pathfinder, which you could play for the rest of your life and still never finish.

Civ VI , so I can rule the world without leaving my house.

I am legitimately perturbed by this question and refuse to answer it.

Pokemon Go. I would have nothing else, but I would catch them all.

The Elder Scrolls Skyrim: I'll never run out of side-quests.

Mass Effect--it's the only way I'll get full completion.

The dinosaur game on Chrome when the internet doesn't connect because my life is monotonous and it's a welcome relief.

Stardew Valley. Peaceful farmer life and turning my children into doves when I'm bored with them.

Crabs Adjust Humidity

Oh my! A number of things come to mind, not one of them fit for print. Just, you know...*gestures vaguely* sex shit.

I can't even stick to the ones I play now.

This is the worst of all possible things and I refuse to answer.

Monopoly, I hate myself :(

Probably Minecraft! I haven't gotten into it because I know if I start I will NEVER STOP. Who would do things like build a hundred foot tall statue of Mako-chan? A-THAT'D BE ME.

the game. Of LIFE! *shrug emoji*

I don't believe I'll tell you, because I AM a salty little fish and it was HARD to cut that 11th choice off my vote.

Holligay and I are going to be the leads in a new buddy film. What's the premise? How does it end?

Be gay do crimes. Thelma and Louise. Duh. :P

I have no idea but only just surviving disaster is how it ends.

You break down in a small town during a roadtrip- your stay is full of hijinks and ends with you teaching the townsfolk the true meaning of friendship.

Doctor Holligay, Esquire, PhD, renowned Jewish femme of many talents, is assigned one Operative Jet Wolf as her bodyguard on a foreign diplomatic mission/vacation/culinary tour of the world ("same difference, shut up, narrator"). One problem: Operative Wolf needs a bodyguard herself, as the good doctor discovers when in one night her toilet is destroyed ("IT WAS A SECURITY THREAT") and Operative Wolf nearly breaks a leg falling down a small set of stairs ("THEY PUT A CLIFF OUTSIDE THE DOOR"). Worldwide shenanigans ensue as Holligay and Operative Wolf learn the true meaning of friendship, and also how to take care of themselves... by taking care of each other.

I’m not sure about the premise, but DEFINITELY it ends in murder.

Someone posted a major spoiler during one of your liveblogs. The two of you track them down seeking revenge. It turns out it was the original creator of the series trying to stop you. For some reason Holligay is a CGI badger.

It's clearly a buddy cop movie, and like all good buddy cop movies, it ends with Doc almost dying, and you saving her, and slapping her wound in the hospital as the credits roll.

It ends as it began: with Holligay roasting you.

A straight detective and her lesbian partner have to solve the case of the missing cinnamon buns. It ends with nobody getting the guy OR the girl and you drive off into the sunset together, perps behind bars sans cinnamon buns.

I don't know what it's about but I know it will be the only movie that ever existed.

Holligay is the lesbian chief of staff to you somehow being elected President and she's basically running the country while you're the charming face of the administration

Nerd and cowgirl meet at a bar, justifyingly murder some gross dude, go on the run from the law and have a life-changing road trip, on the way Nazis are punched

carrying a delicate object through a forest after your helicopter goes down

Thelma and Louise, but instead of dying, your deaths are clearly faked and you live on a ranch in Montana with your respective spouses and animals. One time a cop comes by the restaurant/bar you joint own with Doc and says, "You look familiar." Doc, in perfect lesbian, answers, "Jet's just got that criminal look, on account of how much she'd love to steal my cheesecake recipe. More pie?"

Queer Eye with a Straight Goy. The two of you do the show but in your own special ways.

Doc Holligay is the wild-west no-nonsense sheriff. Jet Wolf is the all-fun cyberpunk cop from the future. They punch nazis and argue about food. It ends as a tv series ala B99.

Your lives are already a buddy film, don’t get greedy.

Hands and socks. You know how it ends.

See Grumpy Old Men for details. How does it end? Badly.

I can't imagine the premise, but I'm pretty sure the planet explodes.

A Coen Bros film. It ends poorly.

Wait? You're not already living this now?

REI HINO

Sure. Why not?

HINO REI

<3<3<3<3

REI HINO!

Rei who? ;)

REI HINOOOOOOOOO

Plush Is being hugged by Zoisite in your banner.

MINAKO AINO

MAKOTO KINO

The best

SOCKS

MICHIRU KAIOH

It's time tooo.... REI! THAT! HINO!

sponsored by Here! curry

LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI [THIS REPEATS A LOT A LOT AND IS GLORIOUS] [...] LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES JETWOLF

(THE REAL ONE)

Isn't how you spell Makoto Kino!

THE REAL ONE™

obviously

IS NOT A RHINO

In conclusion: Rei Hino

Rei Hino is giving this Giftening finger guns

BEAUTIFUL, STUNNING, SHOW-STOPPING, TALENTED, AMAZING, WONDERFUL

Hot stuff, lights my fire, blazes it regularly. I am out of fire jokes.

PASSION FLAME, SAILOR MARS

These hot feelings are C'EEEEEST LAAAAA VIIIIIIE c'mon rei-chan why aren't you singing along

IS THE BEST (I know who I'm talking to)

Ara!

DID DOCTOR HOLLIGAY PHD NOMINATE THE OPTION OF TALKING ABOUT MICHIRU KAIOH FOR 6 HOURS!!

If Hot Pocket were to plan One Last Heist, what do you think would be his objective? What would be Mina's role in his master plan?

Master Hot Pocket seeks BREAD. His friend and loyal companion, Mina-pup, acts as a distraction, as he has learned the humans are easily distracted by cute. While she does her sworn duty as Best Friend and Cutest Goodest Girl, probably with lolling tongue and glee at all the pets she receives, he picks the locks on the newly childproofed pantry, and Master Howard H. Pocket FEASTS AS NO CAT HAS BEFORE.

Every bag of flour in Montana; Mina runs distraction with her adorable puppy eyes

Open every container, leave none unmarked. Mina is the lookout who greets whoever comes and is completely ineffective at her job.

TAKE ALL THE FLOUR. Do it straight from the source: FlourCo Inc. What does a 10-pound cat do with eighty thousand tons of flour? If you can't figure that out, there's a reason he's the brains of this outfit. Mina would obviously be the bumbling lovable distraction to security or other people.

Bread. Mina is The Face who provides distraction to the Keepers of the Bread by walking up to them and being herself. Mina has absolutely no idea that Hot Pocket is using her in this manner because Hot Pocket is that Machiavellian, but Mina is a pocket full of sunshine in canine form and probably would just be happy to help out.

Hot Pocket knows that no mammal of the floor believes in flour anymore. It went away a long time ago. It doesn't exist. But what he also knows is that they're wrong. A lack of opposable thumbs won't hide the truth from him. He'll find the stash, and when he does, he'll stick his paw in it. Mina, with her limited climbing skills, will lick its remains from his claw and prove his discovery. As well as provide a warm place to curl up on for the aftermath of their adventure.

His goal is to sample every edible thing he can get his teeth on. Mina pulls triple duty as step stool, distraction, and scape goat

The Silver Crystal. Mina would play the role of Sailor V.

He is getting ALL THE FLOUR. Mina is a lovable distraction.

Looting all the carbs in the pantry. mina is distraction.

mina's role would be the "dopey" but talented best friend who it looks like HP is going to betray for the sake of the plan but then it all comes together when HP mounts a dramatic rescue. i dunno i'm still in film mode from that last one.

The Holy Bread Locked Within the Cupboard. Mina would be the distraction, but she'd forget what she was supposed to be distracting from and end up leading you to him.

I am the Void. I am the Night. I am the Darkness with no hope of dawn. The Flour trembles before me in it's bleached fluffiness. It shall not escape my chaos, which will descend upon it like the Terrors of the Deep, claws and teeth and gnashing. It will howl at my claws. It will scream for my teeth, sharp and white, stars in the night of my fur. I shall tend and tear and -- Dammit, Dog-thing! How am I supposed to be terrible and terrifying with you wagging your tail and panting at me!? Oh, you found a good warm sunbeam? I guess I can stalk stuff later. I am the Void. I shall absorb the Sun's light and warmth and bring it into my Darkness where it cannot escape...

I'm new here and don't know all the complex lore of Jetwolf(fairly sure Mina is dog), so I'm going to assume that Hot Pocket is an actual hot pocket and his heist is robbing Fort Knox using Mina as his loyal stead/get away car. Then he explodes a microwave or something.

i lik the bred

Mina as the distraction while he takes one last tastes of EVERYTHING

objective--stealing more chips; Mina--surprise betrayal

The scene: Mama Jet's pantry The Objective: the bag of cake flour Aunt Doc made Mama Jet buy but she's never used Mina: confused but excited escape vehicle and/or scapegoat

RAIDING THE KING ARTHUR FLOUR FACTORY. Mina is of course adorable and keeps everyone's attention while Hot Pocket swan dives into the flour like Uncle Scrooge

Hot Pocket would definitely try to steal a monument, Carmen SanDiego style. Mina, of course, is the multi-talented and super cute face of the operation.

I have no idea who Hot Pocket is

HP would try to scale the tallest building in the world. Not to steal anything, just to be up there. Mina would be the adorable diversion.

It would be to get whatever food you've left on the counter. Preferably bread. He would tell Mina that he'll give her some of she acts as a distraction. She's a good dog so she does. He's a cat so she gets no food.

Truly, truly, THE GIFTENING winner is us all.

#THE GIFTENING 2019 #THE GIFTENING 2019 admin stuff #long post for ts

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xurkitips · 6 years

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On Writing Child Characters

So someone in a Discord chat I’m in asked for some advice on how they could get more in character when writing a young child.

A lot of media tends to depict children as either really obnoxious, or basically just small, slightly less mature adults, and neither is really completely right. While there’s really no specifically right way to write a child character, I have some things I always keep in mind whenever I sprinkle children in my own written works that I feel may be helpful to other people.

How did they grown up?

Just like with any character, considering their home life, family, and friends will tell you a lot about how they may act and where their behavior comes from. A child from a loving/open home that nurtures their personality and allows them to grow will probably be more outgoing. A child raised by strict, cold, or even abusive parents may opt for being quieter, shy, more dependent on their parents. The behavior of the parents or guardian will definitely reflect in the child’s personality, as children look to their parents as role models.

Did they have a lot of childhood playmates? Pets? Or did they have to resort to things like movies/TV and books to make up for feeling alone or for having few friends? Friends or pets from childhood may bring happy memories and further promote their growth, while the lack thereof might promote a more distant or lonely personality, or even a child who is obnoxious in an attempt to draw attention to themself.

What makes them happy?

Legit, every single kid has Their Thing, no matter how old they are. They are ALWAYS happy to talk about it, play pretend with it, draw, write, etc. Some kids are more shy about showing it if they've been dismissed by a friend or family member, but others are open with it to the point where everyone knows it.

I personally have a cousin, who's twelve, and she talks on and on about Minecraft. She’s a budding artist who draws pictures of the game's animals/characters, often adding her own personal touches to them. My other cousin originally loved angry birds, but has now he's moved onto the Detroit Lions. He collects merchandise, catches every game, and knows every scrap of sports terminology to the point where when he talks about it, it sounds like another language.

What do they dislike?

Everyone has something they seriously cannot stand, whether it's a fear or just "Ew, Brussels sprouts!" While an adult would say, "I don't like that," kids tend to be more expressive and vocal about their distastes. Depending on the kid’s personality, they'll react differently and it’s something I think it's important to consider.

One might stomp or yell or scream and run away, another will be polite about it or very matter-of-fact in how much they don’t like it. Others may brag about how terrible or gross something is, or hide the thing they hate.

Please Don't Do The "What's Sex?" Joke Thing

I really wish people would stop doing this.

I see this a lot in writing and roleplay, and it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. If you’ve never seen it or aren’t sure what I mean, I’m talking the moment where the eight year old walks in on their parents, who are talking about sexual innuendos, and asks what they’re talking about. 99% of younger children genuinely don't care or just think the names of bits are funny ("Haha you said boobies" "Haha butts").

Think back to your own childhood. There's a reason all those adult jokes in movies and TV soared over our heads when we were younger. We didn't understand them nor care and just kept going. We pick up on them heavily as adults, as we’re more familiar with them and more, but we simply don’t focus on them in our younger years since we ignore the confusing line for what we found funny. It's adult stuff and boring and what we like/want to do matters more than that.

What makes them laugh?

If anyone else has been around kids extensively, you’ve probably noticed that they bond so easily to you if you do things that they find funny (or exciting, fun, or cool. It's not difficult to make friends with kids if you respect them, but I digress).

A lot of simple, quick-witted or blunt jokes from come off as absolutely hysterical, and will stick like glue. Some things I personally found exceptionally funny were slapstick, silly things you wouldn’t expect to happen in the situation, and toilet jokes (because haha poop).

It's pretty easy to make kids laugh, all in all. They might recite a joke they found funny to many, many other people because it makes them laugh so much. They may try to surf off the hilarity of the joke and make a similar, but ultimately failure copy as the process of why it’s funny is often lost. Kids tend to be not very good at making their own jokes from scratch, or at least they aren’t often funny in the way they meant them to be.

(That said I want this one to hang immortalized on my wall.)

If a child has been abused or treated badly, they may not recognize it as such

There's a surprising amount of people (myself included, unfortunately) who only just realized as they became adults that how they grew up was not normal, and that how their caretaker or friend or family member treated them wasn't okay.

Children growing up typically look to their parents for guidance on how the world works. Normally this is fine. But when you were born and raised in a more hostile environment, you straight up don't realize that your situation is not the way other kids live. You normalize it because, well, you don't know better by no fault of your own.

It feels like a pretty common thing on the Tumbles to see abused children in roleplay or writing immediately going, "My parent is abusive and I hate them," and perhaps in some cases that happens. But it seems to be more common for children to be willing to forgive their family because they're family. As they age it might become vastly different as they process what's happened to them.

However, the younger they are, the higher the likelihood that they don't want to leave the people they grew up with. It's a familiar environment and they love their family despite everything. That, and new people, places, and things can be scary to a younger child.

How do they express themself and their passion?

Looping back to likes and dislikes again:

Kids are often way, WAY more expressive than any adult. Usually because they've been allowed to roam free with their imaginations and their freedom of expression. They love a wide variety of things, but they express them in often more vibrant ways.

For example, when asked why they like dragons, an adult might respond, "They're elegant, scary, metaphorical, the designs are beautiful, etc."

A kid who loves dragons might pretend to be one, making sound effects while they stomp around flapping their arms. When asked why they like dragons, they might say, "They blow fire and they eat people and they're green and this one time i was watching The Hobbit and Smaug was like--"

A high energy kid may love sports or running, might be a bed jumper or love to play pretend. A quiet kid may love reading or writing and be great at reciting facts about what they read.

(Kids seem to love reciting facts in general, honestly. It’s fun to show off knowledge.)

One who likes bugs or frogs might collect them in containers to play with, or gross out their friends with a surprise frog in their hands because they think it's hilarious. One who loves singing may be into musicals/plays and performing arts, and may straight up sing or hum whenever they please.

Kids are so morbid

Listen, I know everyone loves to be like, "Kids are so pure and must be protected," but when I was growing up there were at least three different Barney murder songs (among other horrible rhymes and tunes) that would cycle through out ears and out our mouths. Haha, Barney is for babies and he gets dead.

Honestly it was hilarious. It’s still hilarious.

My guess is that kids are curious about things we think of as "unsavory" topics; death, violence, gross-out stuff, war, predatory animals hunting down their prey, natural disasters, all that good stuff.

Adults often try to not bring up these particular topics, whether because it’s sensitive, heavy, or they don’t know how to answer it. Which...only makes the taste of forbidden knowledge that much sweeter. You're not supposed to talk about it, so of course they're all gonna talk about it when the adults aren't watching.

Late night Llamas With Hats. Haha, he got stabbed 37 times in the chest.

Kids are spontaneous and goofy

One of the things about "lol randoom XD tacos" humor that draws in the younger crowd is that you don't expect what's coming next. The protagonist shouldn’t be stepping on ducks. The situation doesn’t call for a musical number, but there it is.

It's always good to consider how playful and silly your child character is, especially if they're on the younger side, since that tends to be when most kids are filled with that boundless energy to do things. They’re are louder than they intend to be, love games and play pretend (which I mention a lot but I've never met a kid who didn't love pretending to be giant monsters or superheroes. My cousins loved Horrible Water Zombies: The Revenge).

Me personally, I used to keep notebooks and draw really weird things. When I was thirteen I had a character whose favorite pastimes were, and I quote, “smashing watermelons on the mayor’s house and falling off cliffs.”

One of my cousins will literally walk up to me and say the most off the wall things. On one occasion, he just walked up, looked at me, then squatted while making some weird mumbling noise. When I asked him what he was doing, he told me, "Bulgarian Spit-Squats," and did that for like twenty minutes straight.

Acceptance and learning with kids

I think a lot of people write children off as "dumb kids" but they will take a surprising amount in their stride and learn ridiculously quick.

True, children can also be cruel if they don't know any different. Like all people can succumb to mob mentality, not know to pull their punches, or know what words or actions have serious consequences. Most kids politely told right from wrong or talked to with respect instead of being just yelled at do change their behavior. Often quicker and easier than adults do.

When spoken to calmly and patiently and a good explanation of disability, disfigurement, why someone looks or acts the way they do, or why they have this tool or that tool to get around, kids will just accept it for what it is. And after learning about it, they might even start fact parroting, telling others what they've learned or telling them off when an adult says something bad.

"No, Mom. It's because they have [disability] and that's why they [thing]."

I've heard lots of stories of kids doing this when told someone is gay or trans too, where they're quick to tell off adults who get nasty with those topics or correct them on someone's pronouns. Society has yet to imprint on them that these things are bad.

What do they want to be when they grow up?

Lots of kids are excited to grow up and do the cool job they really really like. Doctor and policeman and firefighter seem to be the "common" responses since those are obligatory "helps people" and "exciting hero".

But a child with a passion for something specific may be like, "I wanna be a marine biologist," "I want to be a painter," "I want to be like the guy on TV who talks about wildlife." It's also not uncommon to hear about a really specific or little known job that they've spent hours reading about. Oftentimes when sharing this info with adults they share it proudly and with enthusiasm, because at that point kids don't realize the misery of jobs they can't wait to walk in the footsteps of their heroes who are doing these cool things.

There's also the kids who answer that with, "I'm gonna be a dinosaur," which sounds like a joke to us, but most of them truly believe if they work harder at pretending to be a dinosaur, they can achieve that. Later on those kids end up discouraged by learning that’s not possible.

(I’m still disappointed.)

#writing advice #writing #milo's writing advice #hi guys

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autistic-bee-blog · 7 years

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Things I didn't know are related to me being Autistic until I got older:

-Sensory processing issues that affect personal hygiene, clothing, and appearance:

.My sister hates having her hair brushed, because it hurts her scalp

.I used to go without brushing my teeth because I couldn't stand the sensation

.I couldn't wear jeans as a kid without screaming and being sent into a meltdown

.I have to keep my hair short because I can't stand the feeling on the back of my neck

.My sister has to wash her hair and body over and over to calm down/regulate her sensory issues

-Unusual posture or gait:

.Can look like limping, and did raise comments from my parents ('why are you walking on the outsides of your shoes?' 'I didn't realize I was?')

.Sometimes I have balance issues when I am barefoot, or I feel like I'm walking unevenly because the soles of my feet feel too light

.In terms of posture, I am very rigid and stiff, and I sit and stand very straight (part of this is due to my chronic back pain), and I often look into the distance or up at the ceiling. I might be described as aloof, distracted, pensive, or worried, but it isn't necessarily true. It's just how I sit!

.(My sister is the complete opposite: she hunches over whatever she's doing or looks at her hands.)

-Problems with figurative language (not JUST sarcasm, ughhhh):

.I always had trouble with idioms. Think "The grass is always greener on the other side" (I'm like, "Well, I don't know about greener but technically atmospheric perspective says that the farther in the distance an object is, the bluer it becomes"). Or "You want to have your cake and eat it too" ("Yes, because what would I do with an entire cake if I'm not going to eat it?" This is a ridiculous expression, and I'm never going to change my mind about it.)

.I do have problems with sarcasm sometimes, but that's gotten better as I've aged, and a lot of it has to do with how well I know the person speaking, or if I can read their facial expressions/body language.

-Spatial awareness disabilities, dyslexia, and dyscalculia all have a high comorbid rate with ASD:

.I got nailed with the spatial awareness/visual processing disability and dyscalculia.

.To understand the spatial awareness disability and its extent into my daily life, imagine you are a 4 year old in a bowling alley and you are bowling for the first time. You get a 13-pound ball, and there are no bumpers, and no slide to maneuver the ball with and help aim. Now you have to try and get a strike. For me, the whole world is a bowling alley and tHERE ARE NO BUMPERS

.(I also don't drive largely because of this and limited time in my life at the moment, though I do plan on learning in case it does become necessary.)

.Dyscalculia is sort of like dyslexia, but with numbers and mathematical expressions (it is a thing. It exists, and I didn't know until I was taking pre-calc as a junior in high school and my mom told me about it.)

.For me, it is aggravated by glowing screens and I have a much harder time reading if it is online (which sucks, because now they're putting all the testing and homework online and so me and every other person dealing with this is just internally screaming.) I switch numbers around, delete numbers, and have problems reading graphs (trigonometry was a friggin treat, let me tell you)

.My sister has no spatial awareness issues (as she has demonstrated with her coordination, proclivity for geometric puzzles, Minecraft and other video games that require a certain extent of awareness of what is around you and what will happen if you move this here, etc) She does seem to have some issues with reading and switching letters around and skipping lines, but I don't know if she was ever diagnosed with dyslexia or dyscalculia.

-Poor handwriting, coordination, interpretation of directions:

.My handwriting is....improved from the fifth grade lol.

.It's crooked and sometimes I write outside the margins without meaning to, and some of my letters look like other letters.

.When I was a kid, I had such problems even HOLDING a pencil that they let me type all of my assignments.

.In my American Literature class, the girl next to me was watching me write and she said that I don't slant my pencil, I hold it straight up-down, which seemed to interest her and the teacher. I shrugged it off, but that's part of my handwriting/coordination stuff.

.I am clumsy: I've had trouble opening my pill bottles, drinking beverages without spilling them on myself, and reaching to grab stuff at a distance. It's not very noticeable, and it doesn't really interfere with anything in my daily life.

.I do have trouble with bigger things, like dancing or running, and I had a waiver for my physical education classes as a child for those reasons.

.Interpretation of directions kind of relates to the spatial awareness issues, and it is awful.

.I had a friend try to drive me home once and she ended up being an hour late for dinner with her family. I was so horrified and I avoid accepting rides from anyone that doesn't already know about my issues.

.When I was a kid, I had trouble tying my shoelaces and putting on shoes because I couldn't tell the difference between left and right. That went on until I was 7 or 8, I think.

Anxiety, feeling tired all of the time, and shutdowns:

.I also have an anxiety disorder along with being Autistic, and they "feed" off of each other. So I might already be having trouble speaking or I might be experiencing sensory issues, but then my anxiety will piggyback on those issues and I'll obsess over them until I'm even more stressed out.

.I've had anxiety attacks, panic attacks, and meltdowns, and it can be difficult to tell the difference between them many times. Sometimes a meltdown will evolve into an anxiety attack, or vice versa.

.Due to sensory processing issues, anxiety, other mental health stuff, and the effort it takes to even go about my daily life, and occasionally pass as neurotypical, I do feel tired all the time. I don't really sleep more than average though, and I also deal with insomnia, so my average time sleeping can be from 4-8 hours.

.During a shutdown, I can dissociate, go partially nonverbal, or nonverbal. I will stare into the distance, or at my hands, and feel completely numb. It is a horrible feeling. I don't know how else to describe it.

.I also have problems with trauma-related responses, so those can also add to shutdowns, or mimic shutdowns.

.(People have also pointed out that PTSD can have symptoms that can look like ASD, and vice versa. Think: exaggerated startle response, shutdowns and dissociation, stiff or upright posture, etc. Also there are Autistic people who unfortunately also have PTSD, especially from abuse or bullying which can be related to the bigotry against their Autism and cruel treatment of them by peers, therapists, teachers, parents, and caregivers.)

Auditory processing issues:

.This is so extensive, I can't even put it all down.

.When listening to other people, music, or television, sometimes words begin to sound like SOUNDS and not words. Other times, I can't keep up with processing individual sentences or words and my brain will just blank. Other times, I might think a person said one thing, when they really said a word that sounded similar.

.I ask people to repeat themselves, several times, especially if I don't know them well (I am less likely to be looking at their face/mouth if that is the case too).

.I also watch videos and movies with subtitles.

.My hearing itself is fine, it is only related to my brain processing the words and sounds. The same way my eyes themselves are fine, but I have trouble interpreting directions, sizes, and distances due to the spatial awareness disability.

Synesthesia, perfect pitch, and positive sensory experiences:

.My mom's side of the family is very musical, and so is my younger sister (also on the spectrum). She has perfect pitch, and so does my mother (likely undiagnosed due to limited knowledge of Autism when she was growing up, and due to sexism in the medical and mental health fields)

.We all experience sensory issues, which can be negative, but we also all experience good sensory inputs that other people do not always detect.

.For example, we all experience synesthesia, in different ways. In music, I associate certain notes and pitches with colours, or words. I might hear a song and associate it with the colour turquoise, or I might here a chord and associate it with being "bitter" or poison green.

.My sister and I like to describe the pictures we see listening to music, and it's always funny when one of us says something and then the other goes "Exactly! That's what I was seeing/hearing too!"

.My mom associates certain notes and songs with colours, but she also does so with days of the week, and with people.

.I'm not as musically adept as my mother and sister, but I am into visual arts such as painting, sketching, and sculpting.

.I like to do things in black and white, and then try to "balance" multiple pictures to form a larger piece. I can step back and see blankness, and see what needs to go where to make it feel "complete."

.I also use a lot of colours in some pieces, and I'm very good at discerning multiple shades in one section, even when they are very similar pigments

.My proportions are interesting in that I draw things more elongated than they are, and I might size different things bigger or smaller than they are in real life when I am copying something. I've had art teachers comment on it, and they, interestingly, were always the ones most interested in hearing about my spatial awareness and Autism.

Those are just some of the things I thought I should share. I'm curious to see if any other Autistic people have similar experiences to share (feel free to do so!) As always, this is from my perspective, so every single thing might not ring true for every single person on the spectrum. I hope this is of some use, or at least relatable to other Autistic people, or maybe even insightful for anyone wondering if they might be Autistic.

#actually autistic #just some stuff I experience

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deathghost8 · 5 years

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Recent Trip writings

Critical trips before and after the Battle shout idea occurred in the pinnacle trip, I have assembled writings from these moments and the neurogenesis cognitions unfolding between them. ***** I feel that I became a psychonaut during a near death experience as a child, I was hallucinating wire colored geometry flying against blackness because of gasoline inhalation, age 10 approximately. As I started to actually grow up, from 23-33, I inhabited a sort of rock bottom, until I discovered nature’s medicines to pursue to concept of neurogenesis. The feeling that eventually formed in my neurogenesis path, well after ceasing alcohol and other poisonous patterns- was a unification of all the threads I had ever been fascinated with into one idea of who I am and what my purpose now in living is. Previously I had sort of jumped between the threads, death fascination, video game escapism, story telling and shame resilience, sexuality and sex positivity / artistic expression, free thought and radicalism against institutional religious thought, lucid dreaming. The feeling of all of my ideas shaped as one concept is incredible but also feels close to this theoretical unraveling point because I feel so completely moved toward the fulfillment of my ideas. As if the direction change my life could take on, this is a transformational disruption. The potential to advance in a way that is completely separate and distinct, almost like waking up as a different person living a different life, the memory of the one before makes little to no sense, it feels like it didn’t happen. It’s an intense juxtaposition of knowing the most intense depersonalization, remembering it in the abstract, yet having now only the result of re sociation. I’m a different person. I was no person then, and now I am one, which is inherently different, and special, and also really insane somehow. Title the 9000th plateau. This is the blackout part for almost anyone. But. If you hold conscious and think a thought this big. You are sky Free falling objects, falling indefinitely, perfectly. Contained and also falling completely perfectly. The humans. The people who are valuable. Precious. Irreplaceable. They are in the perfect free fall. There is no ground. This is infinite perfect energy. The nature of humanness. :::Protecting our Noobs Definitely do not let little tiny kids pick up this medicine and choose it. They don’t know what tripping is for. But I’m Really super good at it. But don’t them tiny ones get it Or alcohol Because they do not at all know what they are doing. They can’t be allowed , they aren’t even choosing yet. Not till Brain is older. Letting them grow bigger That is why we take away the alcohol We take it AWAY. They cannot have any. I just want them to grow bigger And being safe. Don’t let them choose this choice Until we can’t stop them , they are too big we can’t stop them. And even then it’s not safe if they choose it But only they can choose. We can’t do it for them. Nor can we stop them. Because they got too big for us to stop them anymore. But they can’t hear us saying - it will just take you apart take you away from me into a dark corner and I need to see you because you are special. They can’t hear it. They can’t see it. But it’s what we are saying. “You are special. Let me see“ ****** what follows is a trip writing comprised of past writing that is important in my path to the quest and to the result of the quest, and a little bit of new writing - the battle shout originating writings from that trip will be a separate pinned post***** Positive initiating // shame - vulnerability Shame and vulnerability- our most powerful primal instinct gives me a clue to a true wisdom - that vulnerability state is actually our most powerful mind / emotional place, and we just have to stop retreating from it to claim that power. Suddenly it feels like all I have to do in order to make this happen is to start sharing my inner self with people who are close to me. The withholding it all (or 90% ) from my clan people all the time is my retreat from the vulnerable state. I love my friends and I love my family, all are my clan. I want them to know how much this is the case. I can share how I feel about each person. So that they are transitively included in each others’ experience, through me. I just realized that this particular transfer of emotional currency is a vital transaction, it’s what makes people feel connected to you. How am I just realizing that? The feeling that they are fully let in to your space, that they are important and not just that but vital. Positive initiating is what will allow me to start sharing the vital people in my life back to all the others. The art of being wrong Without taking a risk, and losing, it’s impossible to understand the art of being wrong. There is such beauty in the pain, raw energy. Aliveness Pain and joy feel nearly the same. Not comfortable. The sharp sting of a real moment. When you feel weird or empty I guess that’s a lonely thing. I’m a very alone person. *aloneness is one of my strongest traits* Child like authenticity Know what’s special about little kids? They share their real feelings intuitively. If they get hurt, they cry for you. When they are happy they play, hug, and laugh. They show you all that. The pain & everything. It’s impossible not to feel what they share. Who you are as a person is brought out by that trust interaction. Worship What’s funny to me is this - I am nontheist. I am gonna go ahead and defend spirituality as defined as the sense of self as connected to a greater group of selves and place. I feel as if the worship of god described (as the constant perpetual state in western-theist heaven) is synonymous with my worship of heavy metal. When I’m at a concert and I am a living member of the performance. The musicians before me ARE god. ~~~~ A state of self where you are filled with power and elation. Moved. Pouring your soul out for the joy or whichever emotion is expressed. That’s authentic human expression. And I think the term worship is just their concise way of conveying this idea Minecraft spirituality There’s something very indescribably peaceful to me about exploring and working with material in a Minecraft level. Like in other games I always feel like I’m building up toward a bunch of… Achievements. Defined results. In minecraft I feel the opposite. The time I spend is rich with aliveness and substance. Being there is visceral and real. Spiritual. Instead of pushing a bunch of keys and waiting for the results to spawn… I am there I swing the pick I receive the material I am the world It’s everything and nothing. There’s no point to being there, yet the purpose of every action is infinite. Every action is so infinitesimally intentional. Some art truly just makes sense from the artist point of view. Have you ever sang along with favorite metal and done the scream vocals? It takes a lot of gusto. You have to grasp self and unleash it. At a certain point, audience is left behind for artistic integrity. Honesty. Truth in the sound is to be comprehended by the most dedicated listeners. Not freely available on the surface to whomever happens to overhear. So really, you leave behind the inattentive ones. The ones who can’t permit themselves to be captured by the expression of others. For whatever reason. And really, the audience you want is the audience that is willing to delve in to, essentially, you- and learn who you are attentively and respectfully. (common cause) fighting for a real thing that’s greater than just oneself is a critical survival skill. transcending the limits simply by continuously questioning them enables sustained subsistence within them. why was i smarter in 2015, all the thoughts im thinking right now are Reboots of this like im walking around in a circle. My Aesthetic Dear Fellow Denizen of Earth & or future entity studying my moment in history: (something bernie said during a campaign tour around USA) ADDENDUM- If we as a human family do not take aggressive action to start treating our hero professions in service of the human family properly as such, we will not survive. Parent, educator, coach/mentor, and even student are hugely ignored. T The greatest wound is the suffering of children, the grieving, the victims of abuse or warmongering, and those who desperately want to pursue a life dream and cannot because they don’t have money for health, wellness, and access to vital resources. These are the broken and the enslaved that our system has made. Our system has failed the common citizen. As the most immoral ones have acquired the most monetary power, they have used that power politically, converting cash to lawmaking ability. The ultra wealthy elite have taken public office without intent to ever serve the public on whom they rely. They have become thieves of prosperity that belongs to all of us. It is time for us to act. Bring the thieves to justice and heal our deep and infected wounds. I am the future entity - speaking to myself from the past.**** when i contemplate the intricacies of present day history, a wave of fiery disappointment crashes through me. considering the billions of dollars poured into the garbage of lobbying and propaganda, the deaths and suicides of so many innocents, the abusive behavior wherever it occurs, from neglect, to sexual assault, to indiscriminate murder.. and the more sinister evil, the flat out refusal to care about your fellow human beings that are in trouble. looking down upon all those who struggle as somehow deserving of the biases and tripwires that landed them there, judging and therefore washing your hands of any responsibility for another person’s wellbeing. the most sinister evil. harm of any type toward a child. these are the intricacies of modern day history. the lurid realities that should be the stuff of nightmares, replacing what had been known as the american dream, the human triumph. corruption, corruption, corruption. … to have been raised being told again and again that america is a place of liberty and equality. starting each day with my pledge of allegiance…. one nation with liberty and justice for all —- really that hadn’t been the case since before my parents were little kids. there is no greater shame.. it all comes down from this. the inability of our people to get treatment for injury and illness, the lack of a baseline living from their work, the trap of becoming parents without giving up their profession or economic stability. the perpetual violence carried out upon innocents all across our land. what have we done to deserve it? our system has failed us. our species went backwards, ingeniously thwarting the core purpose of democracy and the free market. these problems WERE created by horrible human decision and they can be fixed by good decisions, but we are going to have to go all in and fight for it indomitably. Crowdsourcing together for real morality is all that can save us now. that’s why i intend to fight back, and never stop fighting. neo-humanity will prevail. we will retake control from those thieves who have commandeered the prosperity which belongs to all of us, in order to do evil. there is no other suitable word. by occam’s razor.. the only reason you are wealthy that can be, is that you are a thief who takes away what is deserved by others, in attempt to, not solely keep for yourself but literally for the power of denying it to another. If the bottom 2 classes of our country actually comprise around 80% of our population, that are forced to live only one paycheck to the next, without the ability to see a doctor, save money for their children’s future, or even have enough to provide for nurture now, then you have a society which is run by the thieves. that is what you have. and I wonder and wonder, when will we put the thieves in jail where they do belong, so we can experience the prosperity we worked for? as the wealthiest country in the history of the world… why are they not in jail for this theft ==================================================== Alan Watts quote insert-- [L]et’s suppose that you were able every night to dream any dream you wanted to dream, and that you could for example have the power within one night to dream 75 years of time, or any length of time you wanted to have. And you would, naturally, as you began on this adventure of dreams, you would fulfill all your wishes. You would have every kind of pleasure during your sleep. And after several nights of 75 years of total pleasure each you would say “Well that was pretty great. But now let’s have a surprise, let’s have a dream which isn’t under control, where something is gonna happen to me that I don’t know what it's gonna be." And you would dig that and would come out of that and you would say “Wow that was a close shave, wasn’t it?”. Then you would get more and more adventurous and you would make further- and further-out gambles what you would dream. And finally, you would dream where you are now. You would dream the dream of living the life that you are actually living today. That would be within the infinite multiplicity of choices you would have. Of playing that you weren't god, because the whole nature of the godhead, according to this idea, is to play that he is not. So in this idea then, everybody is fundamentally the ultimate reality, not god in a politically kingly sense, but god in the sense of being the self, the deep-down basic whatever there is. And you are all that, only you are pretending you are not. ================================================================= Stanley_Surprise_Button__theSurpriseEndingDOTjpeg Next, Stanley suddenly sat down and started thinking about how he was Stanley. “I am Stanley” thought he “i am in my office, acting ludicrous ” thought he. except it was ok because he remembered he started living his whole life Not at work. After he was done thinking about this, he began to wonder. Did I - Be Stanley - without a computer, an office, a desk, a button to push, or an instruction to follow? ? And the answer came to him. Yes. Stanley is who I am. Thought he.

#psychonaut

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