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ofthecaravel · 2 months

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Heaven In Time

Chapter 1: Thoroughfare

Danny Wagner x Sam Kiszka

Summary: Danny, en route to California to find love, picked up small town runaway Sam on a Texas thoroughfare and has been on the road ever since. While Sam adjusts to life as himself, Danny's wondering if he's found love without even leaving the South.

Tags: Religious trauma, mentions of homophobia, Anxiety, very sweet little crushes, idk all very soft when its not Tense

Words: 5.4k

A/N: HEAVILYYYYYY inspired by Thoroughfare by Ethel Cain, even borrowed a lyric here and there. Any and all credit to my beloved Hayden. First chapter of ??? maybe 4?? but I haven't decided. There's going to be more mention of Sam's questionable Southern Baptist Christian upbringing in those and I understand that may not be everyone's cup of tea so feel free to scroll if that may be upsetting for you.

“Do you think we’re gonna get arrested?”

Over the gentle splash of the thin, chlorinated water, Sam heard Danny’s long sigh. Usually he laughed at all of Sam’s misplaced little comments and queries, but sometimes he just sighed. Sam knew he didn’t mean anything harsh by it, but it definitely didn’t feel good.

“Not if you don’t say anything,” Danny answered plainly. A smile ghosted his tired face as he rotated to face Sam, who stared back as he awkwardly bobbed with his long hair trailing behind him like a veil. After however many dusty miles and state lines they’d crossed, it always felt good when they had a motel to crash at instead of the cramped cabin of Danny’s pickup. And it felt twice as good when the motel had a pool, especially when it was nice and late at night and there was no one else around. Sam wasn’t much of a swimmer, but he was happy to tread water and watch Danny float. His broad chest would peek just over the surface of the water and his eyes would close while his dark curls moved like the fingers of lazy clouds.

Yeah, Sam was happy to watch that.

“It doesn’t feel right,” Sam murmured, watching his fingers flex anxiously under the water in the refracted view the harsh fluorescents provided. With the country sky full of nothing but mosquitoes and the occasional whistling breeze, the yellowing pool lights were the only thing illuminating them. Sam felt suddenly self conscious thinking of how washed out he must look in this rare moment where he was the one being watched. He turned to the side, only offering Danny his profile.

“They won’t know the credit card ain’t mine until we’re in Arizona,” Danny insisted in a hushed voice. “And even then, I didn’t give the desk my real name. We’re golden if you can keep that mouth of yours shut. Can you do that for me, cowboy?”

“Sure I can.” Sam bristled, but knew Danny’s request was justified. Ever since Danny had taken pity on him and picked him up on that thoroughfare back in Texas, Sam never seemed to be able to do the right thing. He had gotten as far as he had in an attempt to remove himself from the suppressing influence of his uber religious hometown, but so far it seemed like he was still dragging it along with him. It was an embarrassing first impression to leave on someone as great as Danny was turning out to be, but he hadn’t left Sam behind yet, so Sam figured he must have some redeeming qualities that kept him around.

“Atta boy,” Danny smiled, his eyes closing as he lolled his head back and drew in a deep breath of the cool night air. “Christ alive, I needed this. How long do you think we drove today?”

“5 hours?” Sam guessed, thinking back on the day. “Felt longer ‘cause of the sun.”

“Damn that sun,” Danny cursed. “Burned the hell out of my nose, too.”

“We can get lotion or something at the next gas station,” Sam offered. Truthfully, he found the ruddy blush on Danny’s nose and freckled cheeks extremely flattering, but he knew it had to hurt. Growing up in Alabama, Sam knew a thing or two about sunburn.

“With what money?” Danny laughed humorlessly, sighing again and running a hand over his face. “Although at this point, I’d be willing to skip a dinner to get my hands on some lotion. Mm. Not that I don’t appreciate your presence, but...”

Sam blinked blankly, feeling an implication pass him by like they often did. He didn’t say anything in return and sank a little further into the pool, trying not to feel even more stupid than he already did. Being tired certainly wasn’t helping, but he was really starting to feel the weight of all of his graceless actions from the past week pile on him as they swam in silence. Hopefully Danny would want to head up to their room soon and Sam could just try again the next day.

Danny noticed Sam’s silence and opened his heavy eyes to observe him with a worried look. Sam’s neck was craned and the sharp point of his nose grazed the water as he continued to stare into the palms of his submerged hands. He was halfway to prayer by the looks of it, and Danny guessed that probably wasn’t too far from the truth. It was a state of mind Sam never really seemed to leave. Danny remembered the scandalized look on Sam’s face when they’d shared their first diner meal together and Danny had picked his fork right up and gotten to work when the waitress had brought their plates. Now he knew to wait and let Sam save them with a quick round of grace before eating. Sam had never asked for his hand to hold when doing it, but somewhere between the Texas border and New Mexico, Danny had offered it up and they’d been doing it that way ever since. It sure made it a hell of a lot more tolerable for Danny to wait for Sam’s long winded recitations with his slender hand in Danny’s. He really didn’t mind too much, especially after he’d begun collecting little glimpses of the seemingly excruciating evangelical life that Sam had left behind in Alabama. Danny didn’t pry, but there was a lot about Sam that he didn’t know. He watched Sam lit up in the pale, shifting luminance coming from the pool and realized with a strange, absent pang that he wanted to know. Maybe all of it, actually.

“Not a star in the sky,” Danny commented dreamily, tilting his neck back to stare at the pitch black sky after another long minute of staring at Sam left him feeling flushed. “It was always easy to pick ‘em out when I was on the farm, but I really have to squint when I’m in cities sometimes. It’s a crying shame.”

“We had to have all the lights out in town at a certain time so I always got to see the stars,” Sam replied in a small voice. “My brothers were always looking for Castor and Pollux, but we got lost after finding Orion every single time. Always forgot whether to look up or down or west or what.”

Sam smiled at the memory, remembering watching his older brothers bicker in whispers in front of the window while pressing fingers to the glass and eventually calling Sam in for help. Their parents fell asleep fast and heavy, so nights were usually when he and his siblings really got to be themselves. Sam found himself tired during the days almost all the time, but he’d carried his drooping eyelids with a bounce in his step. Even on the rare instances when he dozed off during study or services, he’d take a ruler to the knuckles with a smile.

“I’ve always been partial to Orion,” Danny agreed, searching it out as he said it. “Probably because it’s easy to find and I’m a simple man when it comes to stuff like that.”

“You’re plenty smart,” Sam complimented. He finally lifted his head from his gloomy stance, his ear resting on his shoulder as he turned his smile on Danny. “Especially with maps. We’d be halfway to Argentina if I were the one navigating.”

“I wouldn’t mind that at all,” Danny laughed. “We can go there after we find love in California, how about that?”

“Perfect,” Sam complied, feeling a familiar sour rush of adrenaline when reminded of their end goal. It was ignorant to feel shocked over and over when he thought about it, especially considering that talk of Danny’s unknown Californian love were some of the first words Danny had ever said to him. Danny had pulled up next to Sam on the side of the road in his beat up pick up truck, told him not to run, and asked if he wanted to go see the West with him.

“‘Cause love’s out there,” Daniel had explained after Sam had hopped right in. “And I can’t leave it be.”

And Sam had agreed. Out of luck to spend and no more energy in his body to spend on walking, it was the perfect escape. It still was. It’s just that the more time he shared with Danny, the more he disliked the thought of Danny sharing time with anyone other than him. Sam was suddenly very sure he was greedy and selfish and wicked, and he made plans to pray on it after Danny had gone to sleep.

“Smart,” Danny echoed with an airy laugh, finally lifting his hair from the water and shaking his head slightly. “I don’t know about all that. If this were a movie, I’m pretty sure I’d be the muscle of the operation.”

“I guess that’d make sense. How much can you lift?”

Danny gave Sam a mischievous look and shrugged, hoping the smirk creeping onto his face didn’t give away his plans for what he’d do next.

“Not sure,” Danny answered coolly. “How much do you weigh?”

Before Sam could respond, Danny rushed forward as fast as the water allowed and grabbed Sam around the waist, boosting him up with a noisy splash. Sam shrieked initially, but it gave way to a surprised laugh, every nerve alight with buzzing heat as Danny lifted him up. Danny could only manage to keep him up for another few moments before buckling at the knee from the close contact, allowing Sam a little time to plug his nose before Danny dunked him under.

Sam met the shifting blur of the pale water and felt a jarring, overwhelming peace as the water swallowed all sound and sensation and he began to sink to the bottom. For a second, he thought he might like to stay there forever, just floating and free from everything he didn’t understand about what was happening to him, what had already happened. What he wanted to happen.

Sam didn’t even feel the sizzle of his lungs begging for air until he opened his eyes best he could and saw the blur of what was waiting for him up above.

Now, Sam had obviously been far too young for him to remember his baptism, but as he brought himself back to consciousness and pushed himself out of the water and into Danny’s arms, he imagined it was a similar experience. Without really thinking, his arms went around Danny’s neck and he breathed in a great, shuddering gasp, desperately filling his chest with air as Danny’s arms reflexively wrapped around him and kept Sam pinned to his chest as he coughed.

“Fuck, Sam, did you forget to breathe?” Danny whispered urgently, resisting the urge to shout and wake the other motel patrons. “I mean, pardon my French, but you scared the shit out of me for a second there!”

“Sorry,” Sam choked out as he began to control his breathing and let it give way to an embarrassed laugh. “I got distracted for a minute.”

“Yeah, I’d definitely say you were coming up on a minute!” Danny sputtered, patting Sam’s back in a last ditch effort to knock any water loose. “I’ve never seen anyone go that long underwater. Good lord. You sure you’re okay?”

“I’m okay, I promise,” Sam insisted, leaning back to flash Danny a sincere look of assurance. Curiously, he didn’t feel the need to unlock his arms from behind Danny’s neck when doing so. In the same way, Danny didn’t feel the need to release his grip on Sam, keeping their bare chests flush as Sam comically mimicked drawing in deep breaths and releasing them to demonstrate his capability.

“Fine, fine, I believe you,” Danny relented, despite the anxiety still fluttering in his chest. “Just don’t scare me like that again. I get nervous enough when you’re out of my sight, and now you’re telling me I gotta worry about you when you’re right in front of me? Phew.”

“What do you mean you get nervous when I’m out of your sight?” Sam laughed, his dark brow crinkling inquisitively as his stomach gave a little flip.

“Just worried you’ll get to wandering,” Danny replied with faux nonchalance. “Don’t want some lawless vagabond picking you off the street.”

“Ain’t that what you did?”

Danny tossed his head back and let out a loud laugh, knowing he needed to be much quieter than he was but doing nothing to rectify it. Sam burst into a round of hushed giggles and attempted to put his hands over Danny’s mouth as he shushed him theatrically. They goodnaturedly tussled for a minute before Danny finally let Sam go, pushing him back and looking away with a nervous laugh still running its course in his chest.

“I got enough law in me to keep an eye on you,” Danny continued on, flicking his wrist lightly to splash Sam. “Can’t have you leaving me to drive the rest of the way on my own.”

“Well, I only ever leave if there’s not much worth staying for,” Sam muttered. It wasn’t entirely true when considering the importance of what he’d left behind in favor of hitchhiking aimlessly in pressing Texan heat, namely his family. He felt guilty saying it, but Danny took his words with pillow softness. His laugh melted into a shy smile that fell on Sam like a kiss on the forehead.

“Lucky me, I suppose,” Danny smiled, punching Sam gently on the shoulder. “I’ll do my best to make the rest of the trip worth staying for.”

“You won’t have to try too hard,” Sam replied sincerely. “I’m having a lot of fun so far.”

“Yeah?” Danny questioned with an amused arch of his eyebrow. “You’re having fun coughing up dust in the passenger seat of a beat up truck that doesn’t work half the time? You’re having fun having to share flat, suspiciously stained motel beds with some sorry hick you met two weeks ago?”

“Well, when you put it that way, it sounds terrible,” Sam laughed. “But it is fun. It’s the in-between stuff that’s fun.”

“Like what?” Danny prodded, giving Sam another playful little splash.

He asked without any real pressure, but there was a big part of Danny that really needed to know if he was making this spontaneous road trip a good time for Sam. It seemed a little ridiculous to some extent considering that when Danny set off, he wasn’t expecting any kind of lingering company in the slightest. At the end of the day, Sam was a borderline neurotic runaway that Danny had taken a chance on after some strange gut feeling had told him to take a left and not a right while driving aimlessly. But at the same time, Danny was really starting to like him. It both confused and warmed him.

“I don’t know!” Sam sputtered. “It’s always fun to look through gas stations for stupid knick knacks. That mood ring keychain was pretty cool, you have to admit.”

Danny only laughed in response. The tacky keychain had pretty obviously been for kids, but with the way Sam’s eyes had lit up when he pressed his thumb to the heat reactive surface, Danny had found that fact the least important part of the equation.

“It’s fun when the diner menus have stupid names for the sandwiches,” Sam continued, feeling increasingly more embarrassed talking about himself. “And I definitely have fun when I get to listen to my station on the radio.”

“And you can continue to have that fun in half hour intervals,” Danny asserted, trying not to roll his eyes while recalling Sam’s beloved church music station. “Anything else?”

“Hmm. This is pretty fun,” Sam answered with a quick, impish shrug. “Even though you tried to drown me.”

“Hey!” Danny scoffed while Sam sailed into another round of delighted giggles. “I’ll show you drowning!”

Danny reached out and they wrassled again, a flurry of arms and bickering laughter as Danny pretended to try and dunk Sam under the water. Once again, Sam’s arms went around Danny’s neck as they struggled, and once again he made no move to remove them when Danny slowed. However, this time around, when Sam felt the careless adrenaline fueling him with a whisper of unknown courage, he seized it and gave Danny a quick kiss on the cheek. It was no more than 2 seconds of his lips on Danny’s slightly stubbled skin, but it struck Danny like a slap to the face. Sam released his grip on him and gave him a good natured smile.

“Seriously, this is so fun,” Sam insisted. “But we’ll never sleep if we keep being rowdy. Bed?”

“Good thinking,” Danny replied a little too quickly, successfully fighting a quiver in his voice and letting out a silent, choked sigh when Sam turned his back on him and started making his way to the edge of the pool. Facing away from Danny allowed Sam a moment to let his innocent, grateful gesture sink in. He began to panic slightly, rushing out a hurried mental prayer that Danny hadn’t taken it the wrong way. Sam almost turned to apologize, but decided it would be more awkward if he did, instead electing to haul himself out of the pool and grab his towel as if nothing out of the ordinary was raging inside his head.

Meanwhile, Danny definitely wasn’t taking it the wrong way. But he was taking it in a very surprising way. Feeling sudden and immense guilt, he realized that he was really going to have to book it to the hook where his towel hung in order to cover the “reaction” he was having to Sam’s little kiss. Thankfully, he was able to make it without Sam seeing. Danny felt grateful for his Southern charm when Sam finally did turn his doe eyed smile back on him and Danny was able to steer their conversation in a new direction as they walked to their room and he kept his towel tightly wound around his waist.

But neither one of them really recovered from it. Something so small and instantaneous weighed heavily in the back of their minds as they went about their separate nighttime routines and turned away from each other when Danny turned the light off.

After an infuriating hour of staring up at the flaking ceiling and listening to the muffled whistle of a keening wind outside the window, Sam finally heard Danny begin to snuffle and sigh, signifying sleep. He released a pent up sigh and rubbed a hand over his eyes as he tried to manifest sleep. A few hours prior he had been nearly nodding off at dinner, but now that he was alone in the inviting dark with Danny, it was hard to keep his eyes closed. Usually he whispered himself to sleep with psalms that lulled him into a fuzzy, dreamless void, but it felt wrong to do so with the imagery pervading his mind. None of it was graphic, simply a replay of how it felt to float in Danny’s arms. And how safe he felt with Danny’s hand on his back. How the feeling of his mouth on Danny’s cheek made him wonder how it would feel if it were the other way. How it would’ve felt if Danny had picked that moment to turn slightly, causing Sam to catch his lips instead of his stubble.

It was shameful, but Sam felt himself tensing and carefully guiding each muscle so that he could turn over to lay on his side facing Danny’s back. Unable to lay alone with his thoughts any longer, he decided that the sight of the body next to him would be enough to quell the uncomfortable desire in his chest that was beginning to frighten him slightly. However, he was startled to find that Danny had turned over at some point as well. Sam’s heart flitted and jabbed at him from his ribcage as he took in the sight of Danny’s cheek pressed to the pillow, his mouth ever so slightly ajar as he drew in deep breaths. He was laying on his chest, and Sam fought the urge to trace the swells of muscles in his arms as they came to cross underneath the pillow beneath his head. There was a needling, demanding pull in Sam’s stomach now, one that yanked and strained the longer Sam took in the sight of Danny’s placid, perfect face in the spectral moonlight. It puppeteered him to slide a trembling hand up and delicately cup Danny’s freckled cheek. Sam felt as though he was doing something exceedingly terrible when his thumb traced a gentle journey over Danny’s skin that still buzzed with heat from his light burn. Danny drew in a big breath and released it through his nose, stern eyebrows knitting slightly in a dream as Sam screamed at himself in his head to move his hand, flip back over, and just go to sleep. Yet it seemed like such an insurmountable task now that he’d felt Danny’s breath on his wrist. Worse, it reminded Sam of the proximity of Danny’s lips to his own, only inches away and closer even to his fingers. Sam’s mind raced as he became obsessed with possibility.

His dreams were quickly dashed in a moment of blinding, white hot panic as Danny sniffed and stirred, stretching his arms slightly as his eyelids fluttered. Even with Danny rousing, Sam couldn’t find the strength to move his hand. He kept it resting with soft pressure on Danny’s cheek as he panicked about whether or not to feign sleep. All the while, Danny blinked fully and his eyes came into focus. Sam settled for a fake, heavy lidded gaze, doing his own round of “half asleep” blinking as Danny studied his expression. Danny let out an amused huff through his nose and his arm facing Sam loudly disturbed the sheets as it lifted from under the pillow and his hand clumsily tapped against Sam’s own on his face.

“You’re dreaming, Sam,” Danny mumbled, his voice low and grumbling as he fought to speak without falling asleep again. “Go to sleep.”

“Not dreaming,” Sam whispered tiredly. He watched as Danny’s hand stretched and rested fully over his own, Danny’s fingers curling a little as his eyes closed again and he began to doze.

It was such a little thing, but that pull inside of Sam snapped. There was something overwhelming him, and in his exhausted, newly freed state of mind, he saw no other option but to succumb. For the first time, when he felt the compulsion to pray for his salvation, he ignored it outright.

Shifting forward, Sam used his hand on Danny’s face as leverage to gently pull himself forward and press his lips to Danny’s. He did so with no real pressure, simply lingering as long as Danny would allow him to and trapping a shivering breath inside his lungs as his eyes closed at the relief. He fully expected Danny to spit and push him off the bed, leaving him right then and there to hop in his truck and find California all on his own like he was supposed to. His fingers pressed into Danny’s skin at the thought, holding on to him as long as he could before this impulse came back to bite him in what he was sure would be seconds.

Instead, he was met with the ginger push of Danny’s lips meeting him halfway. It only lasted for a couple of seconds, and Sam could taste the lingering whisper of mint toothpaste on his breath behind the numbing warmth of his tongue, which did no more but tap momentarily at Sam’s closed lips. When Danny’s lips unstuck from his, Danny barely pulled away to speak, giving Sam the luxury of their close proximity for longer than he ever could have dreamed of.

“Now you’re just getting my hopes up,” Danny breathed with a laugh that lasted only a fraction of a second and seemed more like a punch of air from his chest.

Not really understanding what Danny meant, Sam flew into another panic. He could no longer feign a sleepy stare and blinked rapidly with restless nerves waking him up all the way. His heart pounded in his ears and he prayed his hand wouldn’t prickle with sweat from the dread beginning to course through him. All at once, he could hear a chorus of a hundred voices from back home reminding him of the great, divine consequence of what he was doing.

“Sorry,” Sam apologized, his eyes immediately prickling with anxious tears. “I just…”

“I just don’t want you waking up tomorrow and feeling all…you know, guilty or whatever ‘cause of something you did half asleep,” Danny murmured. He cursed his moral compass pointing him to true north, even in this miraculous circumstance when the dial seemed to be spun on its axis entirely.

“I’m awake,” Sam argued in a whisper. “That’s why I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that with you sleeping, that’s-”

“I was awake, too,” Danny replied simply. “I mean, when...”

An infuriating, tense minute passed between the two of them. There was much to be said, and also nothing at all. Too little time had passed in each other’s company to have any kind of profound feeling to confess, and yet there was a confounding magnetism that left them staring into the other’s eyes with heavy breath and rattling hearts. Danny’s hand eventually fell from where it had lain over Sam’s, but before Sam’s heart could sting with hurt at the loss, he felt Danny’s arm adjust to wrap around his waist and pull him closer. With this motion, their lips connected again, and Sam breathed in sharply through his nose as he attempted to fall into the rhythm of this disarming, second ever kiss. The matchbox capacity of the motel room and the sleeping world beyond its cracked windows were swallowed up by the fervor of Danny’s shuddering breath and the heat rolling off his skin. Sam heard the chastising chorus in the back of his conscience begin to sing again when Danny’s hand on his lower back tightened its grip. His heart hammered thinking about roaring hellfire and scores of taunting devils, but when Danny carefully rolled Sam onto his back and Sam opened his eyes, he saw only an angel.

“This sure is a step up from your little gesture in the pool,” Danny acknowledged, caging Sam in with an arm at his side and another by his head.

“I was only saying thank you,” Sam muttered sheepishly, struggling to speak with his throat so dry and his muscles so alive with flickering reactions he fought to suppress.

“What are you saying now?”

Sam fell silent. He had no experiences to draw on or words in his vocabulary to place what he felt about Danny. Kind, gracious, handsome Danny, hovering over him with the patience he doled out time and time again when lesser men would have rolled their eyes and drove off.

“I think…” Sam started, fighting to sort his scattered, uninformed feelings. “I’m still saying thank you.”

Unexpectedly, Danny’s eyes flickered with apprehension. Sam’s eyebrows knit with confusion when Danny leaned back to straddle Sam’s hips, suddenly wearing a somber expression. Sam’s bottom lip quaked and pouted as he hurriedly propped himself up on his elbows.

“What?” Sam blurted. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, fuck, I fucked it all up, didn’t I?”

“I just really hope you don’t feel like you have to…do anything for me just ‘cause I’m giving you a ride,” Danny said earnestly. “I’d be really sore if you thought of me that way. I don’t expect a single thing from you.”

Sam’s heart gave a deep, aching clench as Danny’s words sank in. He felt his eyes nearly welling with tears again as he watched Danny look down at his hands in his lap before flicking his eyes up to Sam, probing him for a response.

“No,” Sam replied firmly, pushing off the bed to sit straight and stare up properly into Danny’s eyes. “No, no, that’s not it at all. I would never. Never ever. You should know that, Danny, come on. I, it’s just…”

He trailed off again, blushing with embarrassment as the words finally came to him, plain and true.

“I just like you is all,” Sam admitted, thankful for the shade of night to conceal the flush he knew was painting his face pink. “I’m sorry.”

“You keep apologizing when you got nothing to apologize for,” Danny accused quietly. His hands were close to shaking as he tried to calm himself down, but it was hard not to shiver at Sam’s confession.

“Sorry. Product of my upbringing, I guess.”

“Well, I got a bone to pick with a lot of things about your upbringing, if I’m being perfectly honest.”

“Me too,” Sam whispered truthfully.

Danny studied Sam’s face with that familiar worried look he found himself sporting every day now, taking a minute to smooth Sam’s hair back and get lost in his dark, doll-like gaze.

“I know it wasn’t part of the plan,” Sam went on with a small, shameful voice.

Danny let out an airy, one note laugh through his nose and rolled his eyes, finally plucking up the courage to cup Sam’s cheek as Sam had done to him.

“I’m not even sure what ‘the plan’ is anymore,” Danny sighed, finding it difficult to look anywhere but Sam’s rosy frown. “I know what I said, but I think deep down all I really wanted to do was go. California just seemed like the best place to start.”

“So…” Sam coaxed, unable to stop himself from tilting his chin into Danny’s grip. “When will you know where you’re going?”

“Now that I’ve met you, Sam? I think I know where I’m headed.”

Before Sam could bring up any matters of direction, of Danny’s supposed destined Californian love, or of what was to become of them as a them, Danny kissed Sam for a third time. Nothing special, nothing mind blowing. Yet with it, Sam felt every saying about the magic number, three strikes, and the Holy Trinity itself fade in comparison. And when Danny laid him down again, Sam swore he could see the stars.

The next morning, Sam sat in the passenger seat of the truck with his head hanging out the window, chestnut hair spilling behind him in the wind as the bare fields and pale blue sky rolled on by. With his shirt unbuttoned to remedy the heatwave, anyone would’ve been able to see the small, tender bruises lining his collarbone and marching down his chest. Beside him, Danny kept one eye firmly on the empty road and the other on his passenger. On a whim, he took a hand off the wheel to fiddle with the radio, adept fingers spinning the knob until a choral worship song came crackling over the waves. Sam turned his head at the music and made a fond sound, shoving Danny’s shoulder with a light push and settling back into his seat. However, after a minute of listening, Sam found himself reaching to change the station. He settled on a rock station blasting a song dripping with bass and drums, nodding his head along to it curiously as Danny shot him an incredulous smile.

“I fear I’ve corrupted you,” Danny laughed, reaching out to muss Sam’s hair.

“Good,” Sam hummed. “I needed it.”

“Yeah, you did. Just remember you promised not to go running off on me. And no bar fights. And before you ask, tattoos are a solid maybe.”

Sam laughed, pressing up against the headrest as he kicked his boots up on the dashboard and allowed himself to recline. For a moment, it crossed his mind that this might be one of the first times in his life he felt truly comfortable. It also crossed his mind that Danny’s persistent worry of Sam running off into the night was becoming increasingly more ridiculous. As he looked at the man driving next to him, who was miraculously unaware of the midday sun setting his curls and perfect side profile alight, Sam knew with confidence there was nowhere else he’d rather be.

Chapter 2!

#the day i stop writing fanfics based off of ethel cain songs is the day i die #i will never stop or get better or learn #gvf #greta van fleet #danny wagner #sam kiszka #sanny gvf #greta van fleet fanfiction #greta van art #karoufiction

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gooeyringtown · 6 months

Text

summer romance au headcanons

((inspired entirely by the song “striptease” by carwash))

*slight nsfw warning*

i like to think this all comes about by gloria winning another cruise at sasha’s school raffle

(but she and her husband are divorced now, and she finally has enough vacation days at work, so she can go!!)

sasha will be staying with her dad in the meantime

the cruise is going to the Caribbean and gloria will be gone for roughly a month

she’s a little hesitant at first because she’s not sure if she feels comfortable being apart from sasha for so long, especially since the divorce is rather fresh, but eventually she’s persuaded. more than anything sasha expresses that she’ll be fine and her mom should go for it. with the green light from her daughter, gloria feels a lot better about it. she really does deserve it, after all

it’s a little lonesome at first… the service isn’t always great, and the feeling of being disconnected and alienated is a little jarring for gloria

it gets better though

they dock at a beach village in the caribbean where they’re scheduled to stay until the end of the cruise

one beautiful tropical morning (they all are, honestly), gloria sits on the beach reading a book

and barbie tentatively approaches her, and asks if it’s ok if she sits there too, because it’s the only spot on the beach with shade, and barbie is already sporting a slight sunburn that she doesn’t wanna make worse

and gloria of course says yes

through small talk, they dissolve into an actual conversation

they are both from california. gloria from LA, and barbie from the bay area. she is not part of the cruise like gloria, though. instead, her parents own one of the resort’s restaurants and barbie more often than not spends her summers there, helping out

barbie is really sweet and tells gloria she should stop by the restaurant sometime

(she promises she won’t get offended if gloria doesn’t like the food, which makes gloria laugh)

then she has to leave, but she really hopes to see gloria again

she does, because gloria goes to the restaurant a few days later, for lunch

barbie spots her as she walks in and is immediately beaming

(and maybe gloria showed up because she’s had that smile stuck in her head ever since seeing it for the first time)

the food is actually really really good, which isnt even the point but still

barbie sits down with gloria while she has her meal and the two talk again. it feels so nice and so natural. so easy.

gloria is the most captivating person barbie has ever met. she has this ambition and this fire about her, while also being sophisticated yet very down to earth, and wow

barbie, in turn, is so sweet and easy to talk to and get along with. she has this air about her that is soothing and calming. it’s so hard for gloria to imagine ever feeling anything negative around her

barbie offers to show gloria more around the village sometime if she’d like

(gloria would very much like)

so the next day they meet up and barbie gives gloria a day tour of the village. they visit all these little shops like fudge ones and tea ones and farmers markets and souvenir shops

gloria uses this as an opportunity to get sasha a postcard that she can mail to her later

(barbie ends up infiltrating on the postcard. where gloria signs “love, mom” barbie adds in her pink pen “+ barbie! <3”)

they get these small matching keychains of their first name initials because they think they’re so cute

they end their day by having dinner at barbie’s restaurant on one of the private patios overlooking the ocean and drinking wine

barbie offers to walk gloria back to the cruise ship which gloria happily accepts

(and maybe barbie has to keep her hands in her pockets the whole entire time to have self control because gloria looks so unbelievably beautiful right now)

they get back to the ship and barbie is a whole mess talking about how wonderful today was. but she’s still somehow able to stumble out the words “will you go out on a date with me”

gloria says yes

(actually she has the biggest smile on her face and she leans up to kiss barbie’s cheek first and then she says yes)

barbie is dazed the entire walk home

and gloria tries her best to go to sleep, but she’s smushing her face into her pillow to hide the smile on her face that just won’t go away

the next evening barbie “picks” gloria up at the cruise ship, and she has a bouquet of flowers and looks so extra sweet and nervous, and gloria melts

her blue eyes are so sparkly and tender when she sees gloria, and she’s breathless at the sight of her

gloria’s stomach flutters, because barbie looks so pretty… and because barbie looks at her the way gloria has always dreamed of being looked at

they go on their date—barbie has pulled some strings with some people in the village and has arranged a moonlight picnic with fresh berries and warm chocolate

and after, they have the town bookshop all to themselves to browse

they pick out books for each other<33

at the end of the night barbie walks gloria back to the ship again

and this time they kiss

and thus begins their relationship

they spend the next few days and weeks with each other. swimming in the ocean and sitting on the sand, having wine on the restaurant patio, drinking sweet, tropical cocktails and eating delicious food. they trade the books they picked out for one another and read them, annotating the pages and leaving little notes for when they switch back and the other person reads it. they also trade keychains so barbie has the G one and gloria has the B one

the cruise has an event one night on the beach with an extravagant dinner and a fireworks show and they dance all night, as well as at the end, slowly, to this one song

and the cruise is coming to an end soon, and gloria will have to to leave

the night of the big event, they are in a private villa for the night, making out on the bed with barbie sitting on the edge and gloria straddling her, and there’s only the light of the moon, and barbie can’t stop thinking about gloria leaving, so she pulls away

she feels spontaneous, and unwilling to let this go. it is like a young love: reckless and unfazed by the consequences. she tells gloria to please stay. they can go to the bay area for a few days, to barbie’s house, and then barbie will drive gloria back home to LA

at first gloria only shushes her, puts her finger on barbie’s lips and wants to keep kissing her. because they’ve talked about this. there are so many things. it has not even been that long since her divorce, and what will sasha think? she is still struggling with her parents’ separation. and what about their jobs? they can’t just relocate overnight.

but barbie keeps asking. she is practically begging. and she looks so hopeful. so pleading. her hands are on gloria’s hips, over her flowy dress

and maybe gloria is drunk off this feeling. off barbie, and so she kisses her again, softer this time. more patiently

and whispers “okay” against her lips

and FINE i’ll give the titular satisfaction. gloria nudges barbie back on the bed and

“lie back for me. just relax and watch me.” whispered in barbie’s ear

and so gloria does a little striptease for her

barbie watches, eyes shiny and dazed, and her heart is like a drum inside her chest, and she’s completely enraptured, breathless and all she can think is oh my

the night seems to last forever then. they have sex and it’s warm and wet and the most sensual thing in the world, gloria thinks. she is molded to barbie’s hands, to her touch, to her mouth. they are both a mess that doesn’t stop. barbie’s soft cries of pleasure—here in the middle of the hot, humid caribbean island with sweet rum and blue water everywhere—make gloria’s heart race. and barbie’s cheeks flush and her neck arches when gloria hits this one spot inside her, and it’s addicting

gloria thinks this could be the christening of their newfound life together or something, if life was easy

but a few hours later, when she checks the time on her phone, her lockscreen with sasha in the picture stares back at her

and the answer is clear, isnt it?

when barbie wakes up, gloria is not there

and fuck it’s already almost noon

and she has this horrible feeling in her stomach

and she throws on her crewneck—which smells like gloria because she has spent all these weeks wearing it—and some shorts, running outside only to see-

that the cruise ship is now gone

but… maybe gloria is still around… maybe she is somewhere around the island, and will come back, right? she said yes to barbie after all

barbie picks up the book with all of gloria’s little notes inside

and when she opens it up she sees there’s another one, in a different-colored ink, which means it was made later, and it says–

“I’m sorry.”

and barbie crumbles

and you always like to think love is enough. the prevailing force that drives everything to an end, to completion, and that you’ll find your way back to each other. don’t you?

but a lot of the times… is it really? and will you ever?

gloria gets back home. and a few days later, sasha makes a comment. in passing, really. super offhanded. she points to the postcard on the fridge, and says

“who’s barbie?”

it’s innocent, but gloria has not stopped thinking about her. this whole time. she probably will not, ever, she thinks

“oh.” she responds, and the B letter keychain sits heavy in her pocket, like it’s burning a hole right through her.

“a friend.” one day she will have to pick up the book barbie annotated for her. she will have to admit barbie was so real for her

“she was just a friend.”

why did this turn out so much more sad than i thought…

i was thinking of making a pt 2 though 👀 should i?

ps i have a whole playlist for this au if anyone is interested or wants to hear it!! lmk or message me 🩷

#barbie 2023 #barbie #glorbie #gloria x barbie #barbie x gloria #barbie headcanons #barbiegloria #glorbie headcanons #margot robbie #america ferrera

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burnyouwithacigarettelighter · 9 months

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hey!! could u give some tips for new fanfic writers who are having a hard time starting? I think ur writing is AMAZING and aspire to write as well as you!! thanks!! <3

omg of course!! ive been writing fanfiction for a while now (mostly gen!fics, honestly, and not even reader inserts😭) and i found that these things have kinda worked best for me:

1. go back to the source material

if i’m writing a fanfic thats based on a book, and it’s canon compliant, i like to search up ‘(name of book): timeline’ or if its a movie/show, i go to the wiki page and read the summaries. it just helps to keep yourself accurate. this also works for writing how a character acts/talks, like, i think ive watched about a dozen clips of sunburn (because im too lazy to watch the movie again hehe) trying to replicate davin mcderby’s cheeky personality and dublin accent!

2. read other peoples work!

this is more of a personal preference but reading other people’s fics gets my inspiration going (this is definitely because their work was so amazing)!!! it helps for me to nail down a specific tone of voice too, seeing how other’s characterize who i’m writing about/for.

3. desensitize yourself :p

by desensitizing yourself i mean it in relation to writing smut. for me reading smut is way easier than writing it LMAO when i first started writing smut (which, was like a month ago so bare w/me and take this advice w/a grain of salt😭) i had to physically get up and walk around after a few sentences. so spend some time saying all the dirty shit like “he pried my lips open with the tip of his cock”— stuff like that LOL. if you do cringe like i did, just keep going: it gets better with time. it probably helps if you’re not a virgin but i very much am☠️

4. try different pov’s!

i used to write in the 3rd person pov for reader-inserts, which is great, but i find that writing in 2nd person is much more… personal (can u tell im not eloquent at all outside of fanfiction lmao). find what works best for u, be it 1st, 2nd, or 3rd! it helps to stretch those writing muscles of yours too hehe.

5. finally, when it comes to length, motivation or ideas, do what feels best for u!

if u think it’s better to end that oneshot with a couple thousand words or a couple hundred, do it. if u dont wanna write today, dont! if u want to write some wild crazy shit, do it!!! its YOUR writing and u should trust urself:) u defo know urself better than tumblr randos anyway LMAO

thank you so much for reading my work and for your praise! im actually blushing hella rn i cant believe im getting asked for writing tips. ME, just some cillian murphy addict😭 thank u again for reading!

(bonus: if you dont think u can flesh an idea out as well as you think, write it, then move on before posting it for all to see. maybe post your other works, stuff you that’s all good and neatly polished, then come back to that first idea with fresh eyes!)

#long post #burnyouwithacigarettelighter

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jewwyfeesh · 10 months

Text

Tasty Travels - An Unexpected Journey 2

Writer: Mitsuki

Character(s): Suou Tsukasa, Tsukinaga Leo, Sena Izumi, Sakuma Ritsu, Narukami Arashi

Translated by: jewwyfeesh

Izumi: Who knows, perhaps he wanted to be the designated driver for today, and decided to tie the original driver up somewhere?

Season: Summer Location: Scenic Slope

Leo: Wooo! It’s time to alight, everyone! We’ve arrived at the first stop~ Come and enjoy the refreshing scent of the sea breeze! I am an honest and genius tour guide — Tsukinaga Leo ☆!

Ritsu: Fuwaaaah… Tsukipi’s the same as ever~

Arashi: Oh wow, the weather is quite nice, and the air is very fresh~ Fortunately, I applied some sunscreen earlier on; sunburns simply aren’t worth it!

Ritsu: Nacchan’s so cunning~ But, to us vampires, enjoying the scenery during the daytime is still too much.

Leo: You’ve slept for quite a long time, Rittsu! Opportunities like these are so hard to come by, so come on! Come play with us! Mhm, the sea breeze is amazing!

Izumi: Well, I want to go back into the car… It would be nice to come to the seaside at night, but not when it’s currently soooooooo~ sunny! If this perfect face got suntanned, who’s gonna be held responsible?!

Arashi: I can help you apply some sunscreen ♪

Tsukasa: Seniors, please Stop! Cease with your buffoonery! Currently, our main concerns should be ‘where did the Jeep and driver from our original arrangements go’, and ‘what are the good deeds Leo-senpai mentioned earlier’!

Ritsu: Suu~chan’s still obsessing over this issue, I see~

Izumi: Even though I really don’t feel like talking on his behalf, this is just how Leo-kun is, so it’s no surprise he’d pull something like this. Have you not gotten used to it yet?

Who knows, perhaps he wanted to be the designated driver for today, and decided to tie the original driver up somewhere?

Tsukasa: No… I can say, with utmost confidence, that that is the one thing Leo-senpai would not do… so… Sena-senpai, please do not superimpose your own concepts and ideas onto other people’s actions!

Leo: Oh, oh! Y’all are discussing me, right? If you wanted to know so bad, you could’ve just asked me directly!

Tsukasa: Hh… Leo-senpai, do you have amnesia? Earlier on, when we boarded the car, I asked you these questions – to which, you asked if I didn’t get enough sleep!

Leo: Eh? Did that really happen? No wonder Suo~ looks like a pufferfish, one that’s been repeatedly taken out of the water and is now all fat and round and even got its spikes up!

Tsukasa: Leo-senpai…!

Leo: Wahaha! You got even rounder the second I brought it up! I’m complimenting you on your cuteness! But in any case, I’ll tell you right now!

This time, I set off a lil earlier so that everyone’s plans won’t be delayed, but I didn’t expect to arrive this early!

Staying still in one spot always makes me feel like my feet are gonna get glued to the ground, so I ended up walking around, looking for some musical inspiration!

I ended up bumping into one of the staff members standing in front of the car. He was sighing real heavily into the phone, so I asked him what happened!

T’was something along the lines of he was supposed to go to the next town over to distribute some promotional materials, but something urgent came up at home, and he couldn’t find anyone to take his place.

Ritsu: As a result, Tsukipi decided to act as their replacement and help distribute the flyers. Though, this doesn’t seem like something you’d usually do.

Leo: Rittsu, that’s rude!

But, right at that moment, Oba-chan walks out of the building. Even though he walked rather wobbily and looked like he hadn’t slept a wink in three days and three nights, he still managed to settle this issue in a jiffy! How cool!

Izumi: What next? Surely he didn’t call off the Jeep and the driver, and agreed for you to drive out to help distribute the promotional materials.

Leo: Waaa! As expected of Sena! Ding ding ding, you scored a bingo! Anyway, travelling is about drivin’ around all over the place! Putting in a li’l effort to help out here and there… who knows, maybe it’ll call forth more inspiration, and also make it more meaningful!

Arashi: Ehehe, that’s certainly an unexpected development. However, I do think Leo-kun’s got a point~ Think of it as a different kind of trip ♪

← chapter 1 | chapter 3 →

#enstars translation #tasty travels #an unexpected journey #suou tsukasa #tsukinaga leo #sena izumi #sakuma ritsu #narukami arashi

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rafent · 11 months

Note

a kiss from someone the other didn’t think thought of them that way

Time willingly spent together began at the Somniel with training alongside casual talking between breaks. Now? Time spent together would start for any reason, a meal to share together, their good ol' friend training or something simple as 'today was a good day for a walk' any reason would be one good enough.

To Alfred that was perfect as is, he greatly enjoyed Rafal's presence after all, whatever chance he was given to enjoy it the prince would gladly take. Today's chance bloomed from talking about flowers, ones they could simply look growing in bushes or ones that simply had come to mind as they spoke.

"In Elyos there are many kinds of flowers," He began speaking keeping his distance close to the dragon's. "and with it many meanings, i'm sure there are even more I don't know about." What came with a world that had bloomed bigger was more room for new knowledge. Customs, fauna, flora and many more things were information the Firenese prince hoped to embrace as time passed and little joys made their way through his heart.

Alfred notices Rafal looking at a bush with roses, in a way it reminded him of the dragon. "You took a liking to roses? They're gorgeous flowers with many different meanings based on their colors, they remind me of you." A beautiful bloom with thorns, yes that sounded like Rafal easily. "Their thorns may hurt as a protection to the world would, but once you get past them they're a flower as wonderful to have a hold on than any other harmless one."

He carefully looked around the bush investigating the flowers and choosing which would make the perfect gift based on their color. Had it been any other moment he would've chosen one which meaning led to friendship, familial bonds, but just one quick look at his crimson eyes staring at his ones the color of nature and Alfred felt his heart skip a beat. What would one day been a yellow rose now was a red one, bright and passionate.

Who he once thought of as a 'brother' now felt wrong to even say, he was family, but not that way. He swallowed hard as he pulled out a rose of the most vibrant red he could find and handed it to Rafal. "For you." He said, his eyes shifted from his 'friends' hands to his lips and the saliva he thought he swallowed made its way to his throat one more, making him repeat that action once more. And Alfred who always acted true to his heart felt his heart struggle with a choice—do what he wished or let his fear to ruin a perfect bond take place.

After what felt as an eternity of silence looking at the spot he was craving with all his heart to kiss, he had come to a conclusion. Right hand reached for the dragon's cheek, unsure he was he felt a push the moment his fingertips felt soft skin. With new found confidence he leaned in, pressing his lips against Rafal with such gentleness that the motion instead of expressing he wished for a bit more than that, showed that it was alright for him to keep it this way.

At this point he didn't know how long he had spent his eyes closed and their lips together but he pulled back all the same at the realization he likely spent too long that way. With a expression of clear and loud worry he rarely wore, Alfred spoke. "I'm sorry Rafal—i shouldn't have done that." He had ruined everything, hadn't he?

𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐒 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓

Rafal had never possessed particular fondness for the outdoors. The nose-itching pollen, the noisy birds, the waves of heat that inspired sweat and sunburn- all were fiercely argued points of his dislike. Their single redemption came only at a few seasonal windows of opportunity within the year, but as there were no fruit trees in sight then Rafal's interest too would remain hidden. So why he was here? Dragging his feet admirably to the pace that Alfred set. Gazing down at the flowers that were indeed beautiful and charming and all sorts of stirring qualities, but hardly warranted his willing trek through the hot mire of a summer's day.

That answer, perhaps, would accompany him to his grave.

He could never admit to the fact that his participation in this senseless, self-hating, meandering pastime was purely for the sake of being at the other prince's side. Took a liking to roses? Rafal as he feigned gazing at the intensely red petals hadn't been thinking of them. But he indulged the theory regardless, smoothing over the signs of his distraction with the masterful smoothness of his voice; with a wistful lie that just so happened to be honest.

"If there is an impression of my interest in roses, then you may believe it to be for rarity. The garden of our Somniel once possessed flowers such as these. With the death of our Divine Dragon, they died out without a trace and remained absent in our world for hundreds of years." Carefully his eyes- red and vivid as those very roses- tracked the Firenese man as he plucked one at the stem. Anxiously fearing that Alfred would in some unwanted flourish of fate and irony hurt himself on the thorns he likened to Rafal.

That, however, didn't happen. Never happened. He was left only to weather the sight of a friendship crumbling in fast fall. That same flower offered to him with a tension that even the unworldly, love-inexperienced Fell Dragon could not mistake. Soon after came the greatest sealant; a hand curved around his cheek. Horrified, shocked, or simply gauging- it was hard to say how Rafal felt when his eyes were so impossibly wide. Swallowing the human in their depths. "You. W-What do you think you are doing?" But actions spoke louder than words and with Alfred they certainly did.

He froze at their slotted mouths, his snow-colored hair extending its impression of ice to near paralyzed limbs and a ghostly pallor. Arms suddenly without purpose dangled uselessly at his sides, until they slowly regained their function- pressed to Alfred's chest for balance. The lines had blurred with his hesitation, then solidified at his steady acclimation to the other's lead. Alfred, a prince of flowers, kissed as the petals did and he could only marvel at that touch.

It ended just as sweetly- tapering to a stop- though his companion's next choice of words would do plenty to disrupt the moment, in his opinion.

"Shouldn't have done that? Don't be ridiculous!!" Whatever condemnation flared from Rafal hadn't been flame but ember, something residual from the warmth of an embarrassed but not entirely displeased blush. "I wanted it, too. Would have waited a thousand years for it. So—" He looked away on the unspeakably honest admission, ears pink. ". . .That's not for you to decide."

#◜ ₊ — 𝓡 ˚ ₊ 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 ╱ askbox.#floreix #yoooooooooooooo the alfred rizz #rafal step aside i want to train my mouth muscles with alfred #engage ships have so much potential amen #love to see it and love to explore it!

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creativepawsworld · 1 year

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So, instead of writing yesterday, I had a well-deserved, what I would call a Cillian day.

I had recently watched a Quiet Place, the first one on Alex (@cillmequick ) recommendation during the day because I am a huge chicken of horror films 🐔 anyway it was jumpy but really good.

Yesterday I spent the day watching the second one. A Quiet place 2, and it is so worth a watch. And I also get it now, Alex. I got the feral need of Emmett his protectiveness is just urgh, and his grubby look OH MY GOD! I understand now.

After this, I watched A Breakfast on Pluto. I don't know what I made of it. I loved it and thought, what is this actually about at the same time. Cillian had me question myself a few times. He is such a good-looking woman. Kitten is 😘

But no, honestly, it was a feel-good film, and it stirred something inside of me. Kittens' confidence is something I honestly inspire to. If you haven't watched it I honestly can't recommend it enough.

I finished my day with Suburn, which was recommended to me by @brummiereader, read my story Everything but You. And I will agree he is almost identical to Cillian in the first few chapters of that story.

I think it is going to become one of my comfort films as it's just so free. Does that make sense? No responsibility, no commitments. Yeah, that sounds perfect, if only life was that way.

Anyways today I will get on with my stories and hopefully get the next instalment out on Everything but You.

If you read this, thank you for listening to my rambles, and I hope you have a fantastic day, everybody 💙

#breakfastonpluto #cillianmurphy #sunburn #kittenbraden #aquietplace2 #emmett #davinmcderby

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samwritesstuff97 · 2 years

Text

All Bets Are Off: Chapter 7

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x OC!Penny’s Niece

Warnings: Drinking, Swearing, Brief mentions of parent death

Word Count: 3148

A/N: It's low-key/high-key making me a little giddy writing Rooster & Eliza's relationship grow, I've been with my current partner for almost three years now, and I'm drawing some inspiration from the beginning of our relationship. Hope you enjoy!

Masterlist | Tag List | Request

At the Hard Deck, Halo had managed to wedge her chair in between a very uncomfortable looking Rooster and Bob. Rooster looked up when Eliza walked in and smiled, but then just as quickly, his facial expression changed. Eliza looked behind her and saw Hangmann smiling down at her. “Hi again.” He said.

“Oh, hi!” Eliza glanced back over her shoulder at Rooster to see him looking at Halo. “Do you want to go sit?”

“Lead the way.” Hangman gestured towards the table and they sat down together. “You got a little sunburned today.” He said looking over her face.

Eliza pressed her fingers to cheeks, “I did, didn’t I?” She laughed, “What’s a poor ginger to do in California?”

“This isn’t your natural hair color, I thought…” Hangman trailed off, looking confused.

Eliza laughed again, “No, I’m naturally brunette.” She pulled out her phone and scrolled through her Instagram, pulling up a picture of her with slightly longer than shoulder length, straight, light brown hair smiling in a botanical garden. “See?”

Hangman took her phone and inspected the picture, “You look completely different.” He looked back and forth between Eliza and the picture. “Like you’re not even the same person.”

“Not in the slightest.” Eliza shook her head. “I tried to convince myself that that was my ‘natural state,’ but I would look at old pictures of myself in college, when I looked more the way I do now, and just miss the feeling of dressing like this. I like to put time and effort into my appearance and aesthetic, you know?”

Hangman nodded, “I kind of get what you mean. Almost like performance art in a way, right?”

“Hangman, that is exactly what I mean.” Eliza looked a little surprised, “How–”

“My little sister dresses very similarly to you, and we’re pretty close.” Hangman pulled out his phone and showed her a picture of him with a girl in full nineties grunge aesthetic.

“Your little sister looks cool as hell!” Eliza exclaimed.

Hangman smiled, “You two would get along really well, I think.”

“I’ll have to meet her one of these days!”

Rooster was half listening to the story Halo was telling him about something she did in a sorority in college and half watching Eliza and Hangman chatting amicably. “Rooster, did you hear me?”

“What?”

“I asked if you were listening to me.” Halo looked pissed.

“I got distracted, what were you saying?” Rooster forced himself to focus on her story.

“I was telling you about when my sorority went to Tuluum for Spring Break!” Halo continued to chatter, “We were staying in this tiny little cottage, four to a room, and we basically did nothing but drink, dance, and swim in the ocean. And we went to this tiny little island to get our palms read by this old lady…”

Rooster tuned out again, noticing Eliza put a hand on Hangman’s forearm. His entire body went cold as Rooster felt threatened by Hangman for the first time. His mind was racing, Maybe she really is just a physically affectionate person and we are just friends? She hasn’t encouraged anything romantic, except for holding hands, and how romantic is that as adults? Rooster wasn’t sure if he could trust his instincts with Eliza anymore and it felt like every single cell in his body was begging him to go over there and interrupt Hangman.

Rooster felt a hand on his arm, “Rooster, I called an Uber. I’m going to go.” Halo was standing up and putting her bag over her shoulder.

“Oh, okay.” Rooster smiled weakly. “Have a good night!”

Halo stared at him for a moment, her eyes scanning his face with a disappointed look. Halo looked over at Eliza for a moment, then back at Rooster. “Good luck with that, seriously.”

Rooster looked confused, “With what?”

“You know what I’m talking about.” Halo looked at her phone and started walking towards the door. “I think you guys would be happy together.”

Rooster watched her walk away, slightly bewildered. Am I that obvious? He asked himself. Rooster looked back over at Eliza, who looked away as soon as he looked at her, and he wondered if it was obvious to her as well, and if the fact that she hadn’t acknowledged it meant anything. No, she’s definitely given me signs, hasn’t she? Rooster stared into his glass, swirling around the whiskey inside slightly, feeling confused.

Eliza had noticed Halo leaving in a huff and made a mental note to discuss it with Phoenix later, and when she looked back over at Rooster moments later, he was staring dejectedly into his drink. He looks so disappointed that she left. Eliza thought, feeling a pang of sadness in her chest as she realized that she may not be competing with Halo, just not in the way she’d imagined. Eliza looked back at Hangman who was now talking to Fanboy about flight exercises in a hushed tone. For the first time since she’d arrived at North Island, Eliza felt a little lonely.

Finally, not being able to withstand the uncertainty of where things were with Rooster, she slipped away from the table and sat down next to him. “Hey.”

“Hi.” Rooster grinned at her, “Finally, you decide to come talk to me.”

Eliza feigned indignation, “I have been sitting over there, talking to nobody for like five minutes. You had ample time to come conversate as well.”

“Fair enough.” Rooster laughed, then looked at her sideways, “Converesate?”

“Yeah, you know, to make conversation.”

Rooster shrugged, “That’s just not really a very LA-sounding expression.”

“Well, just because I moved here from LA, does not mean that I am from LA.” Eliza took a drink of her beer and sat back, “I’ll give you $20 if you can guess where I grew up, and I’ll give you one hint: I do not have the accent of the region.”

Rooster squinted at her slightly, “Are you from the Midwest?” Eliza shook her head. “Are you from the northeast, like Boston or something?” He mimicked a Boston accent, “Cah-kis, right?” Eliza shook her head again, taking another drink. Rooster paused for a moment to think, then stared at her, looking alarmed, “You’re not Canadian, are you?”

Eliza laughed, “No. It’s basically the one region you haven’t guessed.”

“Are you southern?”

“Yessir,” Eliza slipped into a southern drawl, “Born and raised in Arkansas.”

“Arkansas?” Rooster wrinkled his nose.

Eliza laughed, “Hey, don’t hate! We gave this nation cheese dip, Bill Clinton, and Walmart.”

“No, I’m not hating.” Rooster looked her up and down. “You just don’t really look like you’re from Arkansas.”

“I left my overalls and my tractor back home, unfortunately.” Eliza smirked at him over the drink, feeling more comfortable by the minute as she talked to Rooster. “I ended up in Arkansas because my dad was from Little Rock, and when he died, my mom moved us back there to be close to his family.”

Rooster looked surprised, “I didn’t know your dad died, too.”

Eliza offered him a half-hearted high five, “Dead Dad Club?” She asked. Rooster felt his whiskey go up his nose as he choked on his drink. “No?” Rooster was too busy coughing up a lung to respond. “Okay, that’s fine, I’ll get you next time.”

Finally having recovered, Rooster looked at Eliza, “Do you remember how you said this island is weird?” She nodded. “You fit right in.”

Eliza threw back her head and laughed, and Rooster’s heart soared. “I guess so.” She placed a hand on his knee, and sighed, “Hey, I just have to ask–”

“There’s nothing going on with Halo.” Rooster said without looking at her.

“Cool.” Eliza said, looking relieved.

Rooster raised an eyebrow at her, “Cool?”

“She just kind of threatened me at the beach and that doesn’t sound like your kind of person, I guess.” Eliza said, still avoiding eye contact.

“And what exactly is my ‘kind of person,’ Eliza?” Rooster asked, his heart pounding.

“I don’t know, you seem like you would need someone to lighten you up sometimes, maybe.” Eliza shrugged. “Like you’re the one with your feet on the ground, you need the ‘head in the clouds’ one to balance you out.” Rooster just nodded in response, looking at Penny and Maverick talking at the bar thoughtfully. “I’m just rambling at this point.”

Rooster laughed, “No, you’re right.” He looked back at Eliza. “I do need a ‘head in the clouds one.’”

Eliza’s already pink cheeks were getting brighter. “Do you want another drink?” She asked.

“Eliza, you’re always trying to get me drunk.” Rooster said, “But yes. Knob Creek neat, please, and put them both on my tab.”

“Not a chance!” Eliza made her way up to the bar and got Penny’s attention. “Code red, Aunt Penny, code red!” She hissed.

“I don’t know what that means, Elle.” Penny said while shaking and pouring a drink.

Eliza beckoned Penny over, leaned across the bar, and whispered, “Things may or may not be happening with Rooster!”

Penny leaned back, “What?” She exclaimed excitedly. “Tell me more!”

“I don’t have time to tell you everything right now, I’m supposed to be getting drinks, and I can’t be gone too long.”

Penny nodded and made their drinks quickly, giving Eliza a big grin and a thumbs up as she walked away, to which Eliza responded with a slashing motion across her throat, looking at Rooster to see if he’d noticed, but Phoenix had taken Eliza’s seat and they were having a fervent conversation, when Phoenix looked up at her and smiled.

“I don’t know where we stand, the wedding is about a month away and I don’t know if I can wait, but I’m going to this wedding with her and I don’t want to run the risk of things going sour between now and then.” Rooster looked up at the bar, where Eliza was leaning over whispering to Penny.

Phoenix rolled her eyes, “I get that, but also you may just have to trust that things won’t go sour. Do you even have a specific reason why that would even happen in the first place?”

“We just don’t know each other very well yet.” Rooster said softly. “Plus, we’re going to be very busy with everything between now and then because the mission is scheduled the week before, and I don’t want to start something with her that I can’t dedicate time to.”

“Aw, Rooster!” Phoenix placed a hand over her heart, “That was so sweet!” She looked over his shoulder and smiled at Eliza as she approached. “All I’m saying is, just because you want to take your time, doesn’t mean that someone else will want to take theirs. You may lose your chance before you have the time to do anything about it.”

Rooster frowned, “Whatever happened to ‘Just get married already, you’re meant for each other?’”

“I’m just saying! She’s a hot bartender at a military bar.” Phoenix shushed him, and smiled at Eliza again as she sat down with their drinks.

“Hey, guys!” Eliza was grinning, handing Rooster his whiskey. “What were you guys discussing so intently?”

Rooster looked at Phoenix, “Just the mission.”

Eliza nodded, taking a drink of her beer, “Ah, top secret, right? Too sensitive for my civilian ears?”

“Too boring.” Phoenix shrugged, then got a mischievous look on her face, “So I want to talk more about this wedding you two are going to. Just how exactly are you going to make that ex of yours sweat?”

Eliza put a hand on Rooster’s knee, “My plan is to just walk in next to Rooster and just let Grady spiral from there.”

Rooster smiled at her proudly, “Just me being there is going to be enough, huh?” He rolled his shoulder back arrogantly, “Damn, I knew I was hot, but I didn’t realize I was that hot.”

Eliza scoffed, “Easy, Geraldo. That’s not what I said, is it?” Eliza shook her head and slapped his knee lightly, “Maybe you’re hot enough to scare him, maybe he’s dating a model now.”

Phoenix looked at Eliza, confused, “I thought he was lame?”

“He’s got a way of getting people who are way out of his league to spend more time around them than they would.” Eliza rolled her eyes, “A little manipulative, you know?”

“Rooster has never been manipulative.” Phoenix said, looking proud.

“Okay?” Eliza looked at Rooster, who was glaring at Phoenix.

“Thanks, I guess.” Rooster shook his head slightly, glancing down at Eliza’s hand, which was still resting on his leg. Eliza noticed his eyes and slipped her hand away, looking slightly embarrassed.

Eliza cleared her throat, “I mean, we’ll have to look at least a little couple-y,” She locked eyes with Rooster, who was smirking slightly, “Just to sell it, that is.”

“Naturally.” Rooster grinned, placing his hand on her knee, making Eliza grin as well. “I guess I can live with it.”

“Thank you for your sacrifice.” Eliza rolled her eyes and laughed.

Phoenix looked back and forth between them. “I cannot wait to watch this happen.”

“Watch what happen?” Rooster asked.

Phoenix just laughed and stood up. “I’m heading home, you kids have a good night and be safe.” She winked, tossed her bag over her shoulder, and headed up to the bar to pay her tab with Penny.

“Heading home, Phoenix?” Penny asked, calculating her tab.

“I figured I would get out of those two’s way.” Phoenix pointed at Eliza and Rooster. “Let them get on with their pining.”

Penny laughed, “They’re something else, aren’t they?” She handed Phoenix her bill. “I certainly hope they get out of their own ways and get together, one of these days.”

“I have no doubt that they will.” Phoenix replied, walking away from the bar, “They may just need a bit of help is all!” She called over her shoulder, grinning.

“What are the odds that was about us?” Eliza said, watching Phoenix leave.

Rooster swirled his drink thoughtfully, “Almost one hundred percent I would say.” He laughed, “I say, we let her have her fun.”

Eliza nodded, “No reason to rain on her parade.”

“I can hear the Southerner in you now.” Rooster chuckled.

“What do you mean?”

“‘No reason to rain on ‘er parade.’” Rooster twanged in an exaggerated Southern accent.

Eliza slapped his chest lightly, “I do not sound like that!”

“‘Ah do not sound lack that.’”

“Have your fun, California. Whose state has to subsidize whose, how about that?” Eliza crossed her arms.

Rooster laughed, “I don’t think that’s exactly the flex you made it sound like.”

Eliza’s serious expression broke and she laughed, “Maybe not.” She finished her drink and looked at her phone. “It’s late and I’m exhausted. I think I’m going to follow Phoenix and Halo’s lead and head out.”

“I think I’ll do the same.” Rooster stood up and followed her up to the bar. “Penny, put this good woman’s drinks on my tab.”

Eliza whipped her head around, “Absolutely not!”

Rooster handed Penny his card, “I insist.”

“Rooster, you’re too sweet!” Eliza reached up and scratched his back gently, smiling up at him fondly, and Rooster’s knees almost buckled.

“You’re welcome.” Rooster stammered, feeling his face flush.

Penny smiled at them, “Have a good night, you two!”

Eliza waved goodbye to Penny, who was giving her a thumbs up. “See you tomorrow!”

Rooster walked Eliza out to her car, “Get home safe, Eliza.” He smiled at her warmly.

Eliza smiled back at him for a second, before stretching up onto her tiptoes to kiss Rooster’s cheek. “You too, Rooster.”

Yet again, Rooster found himself standing there stunned as Eliza pulled away, his mind reeling with what had just happened. Numbly, Rooster pulled out his phone and went to text Phoenix, his fingers hovering over Eliza’s name as he resisted the urge to text her, even though he’d just seen her.

“She just kissed my cheek, got in her car, and left.”

“WHAT??”

“I literally haven’t moved from where I was standing… What do you think it means?”

Rooster shook his head and walked over to his car; he looked down at his phone again and saw Phoenix had replied.

“Rooster, come on! What do you think it means?”

Rooster sighed, his first thought was that it meant that Eliza had feelings for him, but he kept doubting himself.

“So, you don’t think it would be weird for me to text her tomorrow?”

“If you send her a good morning text, I can guarantee you she’ll be thinking about it all day.”

Rooster grinned, drumming his hands on his steering wheel happily.

“Thanks for the tip.”

Rooster started his car, turning on his music. Just Like Heaven by The Cure was the first thing on shuffle.

“‘Show me, show me, show me how you do that trick, the one that makes me scream.’ She said, ‘The one that makes me laugh.’ She said, and threw her arms around my neck.”

Rooster rolled down his window, cranked the volume, and sang along, feeling lighter than he ever had. He couldn’t stop thinking about Eliza and Rooster didn’t want to, he was finally starting to feel like Phoenix was right, that maybe Eliza was also developing feelings for him. Hangman crossed his mind briefly, and Rooster felt even more elated. For once, Rooster couldn’t wait to wake up and get to flight exercises tomorrow to rub his progress with Eliza in Hangman’s face.

“You, soft and only! You, lost and lonely! You, strange as angels dancing in the deepest oceans, twisting in the water. You’re just like a dream, you’re just like a dream.”

Rooster began pondering what to send Eliza the next morning, he couldn’t believe how nervous he felt over a simple text message, and spent the rest of his drive home mentally writing and rewriting his message. As he pulled into his driveway, Rooster felt confident in his message, and went to bed with a smile on his face, dreaming of the way Eliza had smelled: sunscreen, roses, and sea salt. Only 24 more days until the wedding. Rooster thought as he fell asleep.

Eliza woke up the next morning and couldn’t believe her own nerve. Just kissing Rooster like that, with no provocation, what had come over her? A fair amount of alcohol, I guess. She thought, remembering the stunned look on Rooster’s face as she had gotten in her car, and looking into her rearview mirror to see him frozen in place. Did he think it was weird? She wondered, rolling over to pick up her phone.

Eliza’s heart jumped into her throat when she saw a text from Rooster.

“Good morning, Eliza. I loved hanging out with you so much yesterday! I hope today is great and hopefully I’ll see you tonight at the Hard Deck.”

Thank you for reading, and I hope you liked it! As always, my inbox is open for request, comments, questions, etc!

Taglist

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@chey-13

@the-untamed-soul

@utterly-in-like

@jayla1234

@madison--xoxo

@massivealienartisaneagle

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@marissabo

@heaven-bvck

#all bets are off #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster top gun #rooster bradshaw #top gun maverick #top gun #miles teller #bradley bradshaw x oc #rooster x oc #rooster fanfic #bradley bradshaw fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfiction

16 notes · View notes

seawatersongs · 7 months

Text

☽ October 21, 2023 ☾

water intake: 94 oz

breakfast: blueberry greek yogurt, tea with almond milk

lunch: egg sandwich with microgreens

snack: bbq pork buns x2, smarties, Gatorade

dinner: shrimp teriyaki and rice

dessert: white mocha Starbucks

Total: 2,335

☽༺⭒♡⁠⭒༻☾

Notes:

Woke up around midnight and couldn't sleep. Not unusual for me. Tonight I did a 3-5 minute stretch, brewed some lavender chamomile, then turned on ocean wave ambiance... but I still ended up scrolling through Tumblr and Pinterest pretty mindlessly. I did go through my photos to get rid of obviously triggering content, but it was a lot to go through because some of ot is style inspiration too. I got a little overwhelmed by the task and left it to be combed through again another day - or perhaps just not at 2 am when I was having trouble sleeping.

I started asking myself what I want out of life, and truthfully I want to explore. I want to live somewhere where trees and ocean are abundant, where I can live a pescatarian or raw vegan type of lifestyle, where I can surf and dive. I want to explore the ocean and learn new things and take pictures of the beautiful underwater world. I want to be a merrow, or as close as I can. I want to walk on the beach daily and get sunburned and just enjoy life.

Perhaps one day. Currently my situation doesn't allow this, but I'll take the little steps I need in order to one day get there. Maybe it won't be soon as I hope, but nothing says it's impossible. In five years, I could be living my dream life, and maybe it will take longer. I need to recognize my limits, push through barriers when I can, and prioritize my mental health.

I fell asleep again around 3 am. Woke up around 6:45 am and scrolled through Tumblr and Pinterest again. Fed the cats, played with the bravest kitten but Stove is the only brave one so far. A couple ate while I was outside and that's progress.

Went on a short walk for breakfast supplies, and then a separate store for shrimp, then made early lunch. then took a nap because today was a slow morning.

Ran another small errand, got steamed bins, and my kid came home! my sister stayed for three hours, and I got overwhelmed by everything happening around me, so I went outside with kid to play with cats.

Sister came out with mom and we had a great conversation regarding autism and how it's been easier since discovering I might be, and the fact it's hard to get diagnosed later.

Then, once sister left, I made dinner. Then took kid to park. I did not do as good as I hoped calories wise, but that's life. I was a little stressed out today. Low energy and high stress,but I didn't binge, I just had a few high calorie food options.

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myloveforhergoeson · 11 months

Text

That's All She Wrote - Chapter 12

Previous Chapter

Find me on watttpad and ao3!

Show: Big Time Rush

Pairing: James Diamond x Original Female Character

Chapter 12: One Step At a Time (1.12) ~ 15.5k

The moment the bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, Roxy grabbed her bag and guitar and shot out to the pool. It was near impossible to get a nice lounge chair by the water on a day like today - perfect weather with just enough cloud cover to not worry about getting a sunburn. Besides, the band’s first-ever media training class and interview were being held - something she was unable to assist with. Today was all about the boys and that was just fine with her. Now, she had plenty of time to catch up on her journal entries and there was plenty of time to work on her new song, tentatively called “Shot in the Dark.”

While she typically journaled back in Minnesota, nothing that happened there was nearly as exciting as her adventures in Hollywood; she found her entries about her new star-studded life to be a source of joy and inspiration. The only issue she faced was the amount of time it took her to chronicle all she had been through. It was tough to do in front of the guys, but typically if they saw her book out they left her alone out of fear of messing up one of her lyrics and melodies. More often than not they tried to sneak peeks at what she was doing before she noticed and snapped it shut, maybe even giving them a good wack in the process.

Everyone needed somewhere they could let out their private thoughts without fear of judgment and her journal provided that for her. The freeform flow of thoughts, stories, or even inspiration didn’t have to come in the ridged form of poetry or song lyrics though there was potential for the ideas to be used later on. Currently, she was hoping for song ideas, but all that flowed out were her current feelings toward Dak - something she definitely couldn’t share with anyone else. The guys would just make fun of her and Camille and Jo were so happy with their love lives right now she’d feel bad for dragging them down with her feelings of confusion and passion for the teen idol. So, for now, the journal was her outlet.

Thankfully, she was able to get it all down before the band would inevitably come out to join her and she pulled out her acoustic guitar to strum out a few chords. When she played it out, the soft chords translated better on electric in her head but she’d head to the studio to test it out later when it was empty.

As she thumbed through her previous entries, a potential few lines popped into her head and she giddily wrote them down. It was always best when the lyrics wrote themselves.

The clock is ticking,

The world is spinning,

Our lives are passing us by…

Reading them over, she drew a line to a couple of areas where the verse might fit among the other ones she had written in hopes it would all connect later. And try as she may to not make this song about Dak, it was nearly impossible for her to create a made-up story like she did for “Any Kind of Guy” and write about that. The memory of her being stood up was intrinsically linked to “Shot in the Dark”, so why was she still so interested in him when this song came from a place of pain?

“Ugh.” She muttered to herself, stroking the pick in her thumb and forefinger down the strings slowly, enjoying the sound reverberating off the wood. “Maybe I should just make the first move.”

A figure plopped down in the lounge chair next to her.

“Well, as flattered as I’d be, I’m not sure Camille would like that too much.”

Roxy rolled her eyes as she turned to the new arrival, Logan with the rest of the band in tow. As they filed into the four seats to her left, James scoffed.

Sitting down beside her, he crossed his arms behind his head. “You should always be with a guy who makes the first move.”

“How archaic of you…” She trailed off, slightly embarrassed they had heard her earlier comment. Quickly trying to change the subject, she watched as her friends settled in for some sun tanning. “Shouldn't you four be getting ready?”

“For what?” Carlos wondered aloud.

Roxy opened her mouth to respond before something dropped into her lap. What the…

Watching the same thing happen to her friends, she noticed a woman with a familiar leather ledger smile once she reached the end of the line.

As she turned her back to the pool to face the teens, Kendall posed a question. “Kelly, what’s with the cameras?”

Placing her sunglasses atop her beautiful black hair, the woman pointed at the five. “Gustavo wants you to shoot some videos for the future Big Time Rush website…”

The boys grinned triumphantly, “Sweet!”

Why Roxy had been given one, she had no idea.

“...So your future fans can get to know the real you.”

James and Kendall exchanged a fist bump at the prospect of “fans.”

“Now, get shooting,” Kelly continued. “And get the cameras back to me tomorrow morning. Roxy, can you get some B-roll too?”

The writer nodded. “Of course, but shouldn’t the guys be getting ready for the interview?”

“The interview?”

Roxy watched as Kelly flipped her ledger open and shuffled through a couple of pages before confirming, “It’s tomorrow. I thought you knew that?”

Setting the back of her guitar flat in its case, she exhaled in frustration. “Sorry, my phone’s still in the shop. I don’t have a physical calendar so I must be mixing up my days.”

Too caught up in their video diaries, the boys didn’t seem to take notice of the conversation between the two girls. Each of them were holding the small cameras up so their upper bodies would be in view of the frame, making funny faces and waving toward the lens as they brainstormed ideas for their entries.

Roxy and Kelly exchanged goodbyes before the talent scout headed back to the studio. Before she had even a minute to recollect her thoughts, the boys were already talking over each other, asking her to come with them and film their B-roll first.

***

James had won the battle, seeing as he had run behind Roxy’s chair and snatched her bag and guitar case. She fell for his scheme, chasing him down the pool area, through the lobby, and up the stairs into 2-J. Anything to keep her book from falling into the wrong hands.

By the time she had her things back safely, the wannabe had already used two large cans of hairspray and a flat iron to craft a makeshift tripod to film his video on. With his camera in the kitchen, the Crib was his backdrop and the only prop he needed was a purple bandana he quickly tied around his forehead.

“3…2…1…” He counted down, barely giving his assistant time to boot up her own camera and get set up on the orange couch in the living room for a bit of stability. “This is James from Big Time Rush. Enjoy!”

After his introduction, Roxy did her best to hold the camera steady through her laughter as he bounced around the room doing something that could be loosely described as dancing.

“For someone in a boyband…!” She choked out through a fit of giggles, watching through the little video screen attached to the back of the camera. “You’re pretty awful at this!”

“What?”

Her comment threw him off and he kicked up his leg, turning to face her. This proved to be a fatal mistake; the move caused his long leg to knock the camera off its tripod straight onto the hardwood floor.

They locked eyes before turning their attention to the smashed equipment on the floor in shock.

“Whoops.”

***

Sometime after sweeping the remanence of James’ camera off the floor and into a brown paper bag she had found in the cabinets of 2-J, Carlos had sought Roxy out and asked for her help in creating his video.

Following the helmet-wearer down to the pool, she spotted his supplies, a pair of in-line skates and two giant red and blue rockets, before quickly putting two and two together. Albeit both incredibly stupid and dangerous, it would make for a good video; a better video than his dancing, long-haired friend.

“Could you help me get some footage of me making my skates, please?” He asked her eagerly, clearly ecstatic to be a part of the project.

Of course, she obliged. Carlos was nearly impossible to say no to and she quickly found his excitement contagious as she watched him construct his contraption. Contagious enough to distract her from what a terrible stunt he was about to perform on camera.

At his direction, she ran to the opposite side of the pool and started rolling. When she shot him a thumbs-up, he used that as a cue to start his video as well.

“Hey, guys, what’s up? It’s Carlos of Big Time Rush.” He greeted the imaginary audience with enthusiasm, standing at the edge of the pool. “I’m gonna jump the pool on my rocket skates. Check it out!”

He bent down to light the wick on each rocket with a plastic lighter before counting down. “3… 2… 1…”

A scream escaped him as he was violently propelled forward, hurtling straight towards his assistant before the small body of water separating them dragged him under when it inevitably extinguished the rocket flame. With a big splash, he managed to ruin the day of the pool goers, his skates, and his camera in one fell swoop.

Dragging himself out of the water, Carlos didn’t have enough energy to do it one-handed so he let his camera sink to the bottom of the pool.

“Uh-oh.”

***

When Kendall noticed his assistant using a pool cleaning pole from maintenance to fish out the camera his friend had accidentally destroyed, he was kind enough to offer his own help if in exchange she used his phone to reach a car service about taking a ride. It was an offer she couldn’t refuse.

Watching him pull out the soaked electronic for her, Roxy arranged for a driver to pick them up from the Palm Woods as soon as possible before placing Carlos’ ruined camera in the bag with James’. He told her he wanted to hit Rocque Records to film, so she assumed his video would be a tour of the facility or maybe an interview with Gustavo about the writing and recording process behind their most recent songs.

Nothing that should lead to the destruction of his camera, but since nearly half of them were destroyed Gustavo was going to be upset either way.

What would one more do? Add on a few seconds of screaming?

Roxy didn’t waste too much time considering the answer to her question as she was waiting in the lobby for Kendall to meet her after running upstairs to grab a few things from the apartment. For his video, the frontman came barreling through the lobby in his MAHS hockey uniform, trading out his skates for Vans, carrying his large, green and blue hockey stick and a smaller white stick she had seen lying around 2-J.

“Dare I even ask?” She sighed, pushing open the lobby doors and reaching the car waiting for them in the parking lot.

He shot her the signature Knight side-smirk so she knew something was up, but didn’t have the energy to ask. “You’ll see.”

By the time she had run through all the possible scenarios for how this could end in disaster, the car dropped them off at the side entrance to the studio. Once she began heading towards the door, she heard her friend call out to her.

“Where are you going?”

She turned around, blinking at him, “Inside? I think a studio tour could be pretty exciting.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure you’re the only person who thinks that.” Heckled the blond. “Come stand over here and switch cameras with me, please.”

Reluctantly as she was asked, she stood facing the building and passed off her device for her friend’s, who pointed at the ground to the left of her feet.

“I’m thinking my camera sits there, by you, and I’ll put yours over here…” His concentration broke as he gently placed her camera on top of the brick red steps leading into the building and pressed record. From there, he tossed her the spare stick after she set his rolling camera down.

Observing how Kendall took a hold of his stick, she copied him - though oppositely - with her right hand gently cupping the end while her left hand took a strong hold about a foot down.

He didn’t even ask if she was ready before he started his intro.

“What’s up? It’s Kendall from Big Time Rush and this is what I like to call The Hockey Puck Cam. An up close and personal view of my favorite sport!”

Then, he stood there, looking over at Roxy expectantly. When she tilted her head in confusion, he let out a chuckle.

“Come on, pass it to me!”

Oh, my God…

Gingerly scooting the camera across the blacktop with the bottom of her stick she moved it closer to him. “There.”

Smirking again, he motioned for her to scoot back with his hands. “I’ll pass it over to you again, okay?”

When she nodded, he lined up his shot before swinging with a sickening crack!

There was nothing for Roxy to pass back, unless Kendall was interested in smashed pieces of glass and plastic being flung his way.

***

After heading back to the hotel, it was no surprise Roxy and Kendall found Logan in the lobby. The boy was trying to give a tour of the famous Palm Woods hotel to his imaginary audience, but out of the band, he was the only remaining boy with a camera.

As the pair entered the lobby, they noticed Logan in the middle with James and Carlos rapidly approaching him from the stairs. They were looking right at his piece of equipment, no doubt trying to devise a plan to wrestle his camera away from him for more of their vanity projects.

Kendall took off as soon as the other boys did, bombarding their friend and tackling him to the ground. Too bad none of them noticed Logan had dropped the camera long before he hit the floor; Roxy used the side of her shoe to sweep the remains into the paper bag graveyard with the others while they continued to wrestle across the carpeted lobby. Hopefully, her B-roll footage would be good enough to get something out on the site.

***

The next morning, the air in Gustavo’s office was strangely bitter, almost as if he could sense something was wrong when the teens entered. For a bit of dramatic flare, the assistant had passed off the bag to Kendall, who poured the contents all over their boss' desk.

“Here are your videos! Enjoy.” James joked, smiling with the other two boys as their bosses took in the situation.

Roxy tried to ease the tension by setting her video camera on the desk. In the morning she had even polished it so it would shine a little brighter as it sat on the pile of remanence.

Peering over the parts scattered over his untidy desk, Gustavo froze as Kelly picked up Carlos’ camera. Though it was in one piece, it let out an electrical spark when she tapped the side with her palm, suggesting nearly all was lost. The producer didn’t have a moment to articulate his thoughts before letting out one of his notorious screams, which the girl quickly covered her ears for.

When a few good, long minutes of screeching passed, Gustavo seemed to be doing much better. So much in fact, he seemed to forget the incident altogether as he dragged Team BTR to Studio A for a meeting. As per usual, the teens followed and lined up while Kelly and Gustavo began to speak; Roxy did her best to take notes in case they would be useful later.

Beside the adults was a presentation under a red cloth and the assistant was dying to know what was under it.

“Okay, our album comes out in a few months.” He began, watching the boys give each other celebratory pats on the back. “And given our recent web video disaster, it’s time for phase two of my Get Big Time Rush On The Web So People Will Know About You And Buy Your Album In A Few Months plan.”

That title needs some work.

Kendall pointed to the display across the room. “Is that phase two under the sheet?”

Holding out her pointer fingers as she used her hands while she spoke, Kelly beamed back at him. “Get ready! Because today, Big Time Rush is spending…”

She tore the red cloth off, revealing a TV monitor on a small stand displaying a web-blog Roxy recognized immediately.

“A day with Deke?” Her question came out more like an excited shout. Deke was the music and pop culture authority in L.A., everybody who was anybody was featured on his blog. “This is way better than that stuffy news interview you had planned! Deke is like… so cool. He did a column on this kid, Justin Bieber I think, a month ago, and his first single went totally viral!”

Her reaction was more than warranted, if this interview went well it could launch the boys into fame overnight.

“He’s Hollywood’s number one entertainment music blogger.” Gustavo further explained, holding up his pointer finger before Kelly jumped in again.

“Guys, Dak Zevon was a nobody until he spent the day ice fishing with Deke. Then he became…” She used the remote in her hand to change the slide on the monitor. “‘The Reel Deal.’”

The picture on the screen changed to one the writer was very familiar with. Sitting on a blue stool in the middle of a frozen tundra sat her crush, bundled up in big winter clothes and reeling in a small fish from a hole in the ground. Since Deke’s interview with Dak about a year and a half ago, Dak rose to stardom in both the music and movie worlds. This particular interview was what got her so acquainted with Deke’s blog in the first place - now Roxy waited for his weekly updates in order to discover who was next to climb to fame.

“And today, it’s Big Time Rush at the famous Palm Woods pool!” The producer announced. Surprisingly the guys seemed really into it as they gave each other high fives with a chorus of cheers.

As the girl scribbled down some of Deke’s favorite conversation topics she’d learned from browsing his blog, Kendall spoke again, “Cool, so we just have to hang out with this guy and be the real us?”

Their bosses turned to face each other before erupting with laughter, thoroughly confusing the teens.

“No!” They exclaimed.

Waving his hands in front of his body in disgust, Gustavo explained, “I don’t want him anywhere near the real you. You’ll just knock him into the pool or slice off his arm with a hockey stick.”

“‘Cause that’s bad, right?” Carlos asked before his assistant tried to move the conversation in a different direction.

“I can make sure they’re never too close to the edge and don’t touch hockey sticks for the entire day.” Roxy offered, trying to help ease the tension.

The talent scout sighed, doing her best to appeal to the band. “If you have a bad day with Deke, your careers could end up like Tanyon Lavell’s.”

Each band member furrowed their bow in confusion before asking, “Who’s Tanyon Lavell?”

“Exactly…” Noted the writer. “Bottom line is, you four can’t mess this up. Your entire future is on the line here! I’ll help however I can, but once the interview starts it’s up to all of you.”

Gustavo beckoned the teens over, “That’s a good start, Roxanne. But for now, I present to you my Day With Deke Big Time Dawg Training Preparation Team!”

Taking an air horn off the table behind her, Kelly blew it. The siren wailed, filling up the studio as a handful of teams from around Rocque Records ran into the room at her call. Roxy recognized the marketing team, and the styling team, but there was a man she had never seen before with a long, gray beard dressed in what looked like tan ceremonial robes and a black belt.

“Change them!” The marketing duo immediately demanded, pointing at the band as the stylists hustled over to the boys with a clothing rack in tow. With the four occupied with their makeover, Roxy was dragged to the side by her bosses as the two execs began to move large pieces of furniture into the studio that looked an awful lot like the fire pits back at the Palm Woods.

The girl had half a mind to pull out her book and attempt to pick Gustavo’s brain for advice, but she wasn’t sure “Shot in the Dark” was a good candidate for a Big Time Rush song. It wasn’t consistent with the message their first few songs were sending and the topic seemed just a little bit too serious for a boy band to be singing about. There was no reason an up-and-coming band should have one of their debut songs on their debut album apologizing to the audience for being unreliable when the whole point of the boy band is to make their audience feel loved and carefree.

Who would want to listen to a song about my personal relationship troubles?

With a sigh, she pulled out her book, thumbing through the pages, and sat in one of the black wicker chairs that surrounded the circular fire pit. Across from her, she noticed a long semi-circular sofa being pulled in, presumably for the guys to sit next to each other on, and a handful of lush, green tropical plants were placed behind it to give off the outdoor vibe. Apparently, the marketing team wanted this media training session to be as close to the real thing as possible.

Oddly enough, it reminded the writer of the first night the band spent in Hollywood. After their horrible day at Rocque Records leading to their subsequent termination, one of the fire pits at the Palm Woods was the site in which the band decided they would not go back to Minnesota willingly. Big Time Rush was born that night; it was a very important spot for the five.

Thoughts swirled around in her brain as the memory came back in a few flashes. The warmth of the fire, the softness of Mrs. Knight’s sweater, her damp hair leaving a wet stain on her leggings… Quickly, Roxy reached for the pen tucked in the front cover.

I don’t know,

How I would,

Ever go all alone,

Walking on my own.

And now the song was about the guys. It kept getting stranger and stranger.

Scribbling out a few chord progressions to match with the chorus, the writer sighed in frustration when she couldn’t get these lyrics to match up with the pre-existing melody she had written earlier. Though, her train of thought was derailed once the boys finally entered the studio in their new outfits. Like their assistant, they were very impressed with the set design as they filed onto the couch one by one, looking around to try and note any differences between these fire pits and the ones at the Palm Woods. They had been fitted in very fashion forward colorful graphic t-shirts and dark jeans - save James who was dressed oppositely in a dark shirt and bright red pants. Oddly enough, his outfit was the only one that looked like something he would normally wear.

Maybe he fought the stylist. She thought, chuckling to herself as she drummed her fingers over the cover of her songbook.

“I know we look ridiculous, but you don’t have to laugh!” Logan said to her, a hurt look crossing his face despite his outfit being one of the better ones. Only strapped with a strange graphic t-shirt and jeans, there was certainly nothing to laugh at.

His comment brought on a few more seconds of laughter. “It’s not you, I promise! The four of you look good.”

“Then all that Pop Tiger must be going to your head…” Grumbled Kendall, picking at the zipper on his purple leather jacket atop a yellow shirt.

“Just relax,” She told him, despite knowing full well he wouldn’t. “I know it’s not your first choice, but it’s a popular style right now. You do want to be adored by teens all around the world, right?”

“Right.” The blond rolled his eyes, before trying to change the subject. Pointing to the journal in her lap, he cocked his head. “Working on something new?”

At the prospect of “new”, Carlos and James popped into the conversation from the other side of the couch. Once they spied the book in her lap, the dots connected. “Did someone say new song?”

Twirling her pen in her hand, Roxy wasn’t quite sure how to respond. She hadn’t contributed anything to the band since “Halfway There” and she certainly didn’t want them to think she was slacking off on her writing duties.

She tried to keep her answer as vague as possible, “It’s just a few verses, nothing special.”

“Let us know if you need help!” Carlos replied with a bright smile on his face.

Their conversation was cut short as the female marketing exec began to address the band.

“Boys, we’ve not only re-created the Palm Woods pool setting for your day with Deke…”

Her tall partner reached behind themself and pulled out a cardboard cut out of the blogger from behind one of the many fake palm trees. “We’ve also re-created Deke!”

Carlos cut them off, giggling at the sight of the smaller boy. “He’s so tiny!”

“Roxy thinks that guy is cool?” Huffed James.

“Please don’t say that when you see him, because it is very important what he thinks of you!” Gustavo cried, stepping forward to address the band. “Got it?”

“Got it.” They chorused, grumpily slumping back into the sofa.

Coughing into her hand, Roxy added: “Sit up straight.”

“Now, good luck with your training, my young padawans.” Their boss finished, turning the training back over to the marketing duo. He and Kelly exited the studio, not motioning for the assistant to come with, leaving Roxy to sit in on the meeting as well. Media training could prove to be an important skill to have for the future, so she made sure to take notes.

“Boys,” The woman began again. “We’ve analyzed every one of Deke’s celebrity blogs and have the questions he’s most likely to ask.”

“So let’s get started.” The other individual continued, placing their hand on Deke’s cardboard shoulder and pretending as if they were the blogger. “Kendall, how would you describe BTR’s music?”

Easy! Roxy thought. A blend of pop rock and power pop with a dash of electronic influences coming together to create music for the modern teen.

“Oh…” Trailed the frontman. “Um, I’d say it’s got some rock and…”

Beep

A sad-sounding buzzer went off, controlled by a remote in one of the exec’s hands, startling the band as they jumped in their seats.

“Too long!” She chastised. “Deke wants juicy sound bites he can sink his blog into.”

That doesn’t make any sense… Where does Gustavo find these people?

As they had been doing, the other exec finished her sentence. “Say ‘Big Time Rush is a fun mix of rock and pop, with a dash of R&B.’”

“So you want them to dumb it down? The genre of their music so much more complex.” Came out of Roxy’s mouth without thinking.

Heads turned to face her; She covered her mouth in embarrassment. “Sorry… It won’t happen again.”

“Logan, if you weren’t in a band, what would you be doing right now?” The woman spoke again, not missing a beat.

His response was quick and concise. “Studying to be a doctor!”

Beep

Pressing down on the trigger, the buzzer went off again signaling the answer was incorrect.

“Wrong,” Warned the partner. “Deke is gonna think you’re geeky. Say you’d rather be snowboarding.”

“Snowboarding?” Logan repeated, confused.

“Snowboarding.” They affirmed.

“At least make it more relatable and say ‘playing hockey’ or something.” Roxy offered, before earning a side glance from her friend. “But studying to be a doctor is a perfectly acceptable answer!”

Glaring at her, the execs sighed.

Apologizing, she realized the training was going to continue without her input being taken into consideration. “Sorry… again.”

Question after question was thrown at the boys, and to no one’s surprise, none of their answers were interesting enough for the marketing team. With topics varying from James’ lucky comb, to antidisestablishmentarianism, to apatosauruses, to golden shoes, to cheese sticks, nothing was exciting enough to make the list of topics the band should discuss during their all-day interview.

At one point, Roxy had to pull Logan off the couch and bring him to the kitchen for a bottle of water after a particularly gut-wrenching question about his childhood left him sobbing in her arms. The marketing duo was brutal and unrelenting with their questions, leaving no holds barred in terms of subject matter, hoping to find at least one interesting thing about the band.

The sound of the buzzer going off over and over and over left the sound ringing in the teen's ears as the piercing eyes of the marketing team were unrelentingly cruel. By the time the session was over, it felt as though days had passed when in reality, it had only been a little over an hour.

“Okay, according to those answers, we predict that Deke will think you’re slightly more advanced than cavemen who like corndogs.” Announced the woman, double-checking her written notes from the entire session in a large leather folder.

At the notion of this, James let out a yelp. “We can do better!”

“Yeah!” Logan agreed, backing his friend up. “We are way more developed than cavemen, Cro-Magnon even.”

“And we like hot dogs too!” Carlos shared in an attempt to help.

Seeing his bandmates stand in solidarity, Kendall joined as well. “We’re just four hockey players who love singing, and we can’t wait for people to hear our first album.”

Pressing down on their button, the other exec caused a green light to go off on the cutout of Deke.

Ding ding

The sound was like music to their ears. Finally, they had created and shared an answer worthy of a question from the mighty blogger.

“Yes!” Cheered their assistant as she jumped out of her chair. “That was perfect! Remember that answer!”

Finally, the two adults allowed the tension to flow from their bodies as they smiled at their students. “Congratulations. Deke now thinks that Big Time Rush is four dedicated, smart, and fun-loving guys who share a passion for music.”

“And he’s looking forward to your album.”

Seeing the band celebrate caused a bout of pride to swell in the writer’s chest. After they nailed this interview, their EP would be flying off the digital shelves and open doors they couldn’t even dream of.

The four stood before her, grinning, as they congratulated each other for their hard work. It was an inspiring scene, inspiring enough for a set of lyrics to arise from the situation - a set with a pattern that didn’t match any of her other lyrics for “Shot in the Dark”; something completely separate.

Grabbing her book, she knelt at the fire pit, using it for a flat surface as she wrote them out.

Oh, no, I don’t have all the answers,

But there is one thing, that I know for sure

One is good, but four is better

It took some time to get here,

But it’s better late than never

Even better than just a set of lyrics, she might even know how to place them, practically hearing it in James’ voice as she wrote it out on the page. Glancing up, she found the band looking at her expectantly.

“James,” She started, pointing at the long-haired boy. “Repeat after me.”

Singing out the five lines, and struggling to hit the high note placed at the end, she patiently waited for the boy to sing it back to her.

“Oh, no…”

She didn’t need to wait for him to finish before she scratched out his name in big, bold letters in the margins next to the lyric set.

“Okay, now, Kendall.” His eyes snapped to meet hers. “Can you join James on the third line and sing it an octave higher? Then finish out the ‘Took some time to get here… bit with him?”

The blond waited for her to finish before he counted up from four, letting James sing his parts and then doing as the writer requested.

From there, their singing spoke for itself. These two were perfect for this verse of the song and their voices complimented each other very well, blending in a way that just seemed effortless. The verse, just as she imagined it, was coming to life before her. Writing Kendall’s name down as well, excitement buzzed in her brain.

My first song arrangement… She was one step closer to becoming the world’s best songwriter.

“Why do I hear singing when I should be hearing interview practice?”

Their boss’ booming voice caught the teens off guard as they followed the sound of his voice to the studio entrance. Standing with Kelly, Gustavo crossed his arms and tapped his foot, impatiently waiting for his answer.

Roxy quickly scooped her book up from the fire pit ledge, “I was just throwing around song arrangement ideas, so I asked Kendall and James if they could help me out for a moment while they took a break.”

“No more breaks!” He declared, eyeing the marketing team. “Roxanne, you can focus on your song after the interview, alright? But for now, I need you to come with me and Kelly.”

The writer’s response was prompt as she gathered her belongings, “Yes, sir. Be right there.”

As she left, she turned back to the band just before exiting the doorway. “Thanks for your help! I promise I’ll work on a verse for Logan and Carlos next. Good luck with the rest of the training.”

Trotting off down the hall she quickly found her bosses in Gustavo’s office.

The producer was tucked behind his desk, five different cellphones in front of him, while Kelly stood across from him as they conversed. The assistant stood beside her as they waited for the producer to explain why he had called them in.

“Shouldn’t we be helping the guys?” The talent scout asked, clearly concerned for their well-being alone in the hands of the marketing department.

Waving his arms in front of the five cell phones, the man displayed a rare smile. “We are. Welcome to phase three of my Big Time Internet Blitz. I’m giving the guys Scuttlebutter accounts.”

“Uh…” Roxy stopped him, bursting his oblivious bubble. “They already have Scuttlebutter accounts.”

“Well tell them to delete them! These are their new, official accounts. That way, they can text their fans what’s the haps, only they won’t be posting. It’ll be me because they are stupid.”

Looking at one another, the girls knew that this was a terrible plan. Gustavo needed a gentle reminder there was a reason he hadn’t been in the news since the ‘90s. Not only was he generally disagreeable, but he was also unaware of the weight his words carried. Though he understood he was a famous celebrity, it was a fact often lost on him whenever he spoke.

Hesitantly, Kelly took one of the phones out from in front of him and began to press the shutdown button, “Please don’t do that.”

“It’s easy!” Gustavo bit back, snatching the phone back out of his co-worker's hands. “I signed up too. You just scuttbutt fun facts about yourself.”

“If it’s so easy, why not let the guys handle it themselves? They’ve been doing just fine up to this point.” Roxy asked, grabbing a phone that looked similar to hers. Tapping a few buttons, she booted up the ScuttleButter app and stepped back so the producer couldn’t reach the device. Quickly, she typed Carlos’ handle into the search bar and read off his most recent scuttbutts. “Here’s a few from @KingCarlos96: ‘Had a corndog 4 breakfast, yum’, ‘Saw a bird in da park’, ‘Do bees really have knees’.”

Gustavo grunted in disapproval, “See?” The word was said with a twinge of know-it-all. “Stupid. Here’s mine: ‘I hate brusselsprouts.’”

When he finished scuttbutting, he held it out for the other two to see. Roxy didn’t have the heart to tell him his tweet was just as stupid as any one of the guys’.

“It’s two words: Brussels sprouts.” Kelly corrected as she stared at the writing on the screen, annoyed with this entire situation.

As her boss tried to edit his scuttbutt, which he couldn’t seeing as that was a feature not yet offered on the app, Roxy didn’t offer any help on how to fix his current problem. Instead, she deleted Scuttlebutter on the phone she was holding and swiped another one while Gustavo was preoccupied with deleting his last message and typing up a new one.

Swoosh

The familiar sound alerted the teenager that her boss had just sent his fun fact out into the world. The message soon appeared on the burner phone’s scuttbutt feed; apparently, the accounts he made for the boys all followed him. “Mr. Rocque… You just sent out a scuttbutt saying you hate Brussels.”

“As in the capital of Belgium.” Clarified the talent scout.

“Ahh!” He gasped, feigning fright before erupting in a fit of laughter at Kelly’s comment. “Who cares?”

This was a fight Roxy didn’t want to get involved in. Hate wasn’t her style, especially when it came to insulting an entire group of people. While her bosses argued back and forth, she deactivated Scuttlebutter on the remaining phones and slowly ducked out of the room. Whatever results came of Gustavo’s actions would be his alone to face.

Hopefully, he knows his messages can be seen worldwide.

Making her way back into the studio, she once again sat in the black wicker chair across from the boys. This time, the man in the tan robe and black belt from the morning’s meeting was standing in the front of the room with a basket of biscuits beside him. Though she didn’t know what purpose they served, the sight of food made her stomach growl.

Glancing to the side, Logan noticed the girl and shot her a wave. Just as she was about to return the gesture, the man took one of the biscuits from his basket and chucked it at the boy, hitting him square in the chest with a thud. “No waving to other people! Deke will think you are distracted and bored with the interview. Keep your eyes trained on him instead.”

“He was just being polite!” Roxy growled at the old man, not pleased with his violent attitude toward her friend. “No need to assault him with a biscuit.”

She should have expected the first biscuit that came flying her way, knocking her in the chest, but the second was an unwelcome surprise as it slapped her cheek.

Involuntarily dropping her jaw in shock, she glanced over to the boys and then back at their instructor. Rubbing her cheek, she had half a mind to pick one of the rolls off the floor and throw it right back.

“No talking out of turn and no growling! You are unpleasant.”

Oh, I’ll show him unpleasant…

James took this opportunity to whip his lucky comb out of the inner pocket of his black leather jacket to straighten out his hair. A fact that did not go unnoticed by the man, who threw yet another bun right at him.

“Ow! What the heck, Mr. Fong?” The wannabe complained, brushing some stray crumbs off his red pants.

Now, at the very least, the assistant could put a name to the old, cranky face.

Mr. Fong shook his head in disappointment as he addressed James’ question. “Deke thinks you are shallow and only care about appearances.”

“Uh, is that bad?”

Another biscuit was thrown straight into his chest, this one deserved.

Next to James, Carlos and Logan threw their arms up in defense in case the biscuit ricocheted off their friend before eventually relaxing and crossing them. Neither of them were interested in finding out what a biscuit to the head would spell in terms of disaster. The old man seemed to have quite the arm.

This decision, however, was poor as the pair got two rolls of their own thrown their way.

“Never cross your arms!” Yelled Mr. Fong, causing the band to cower and do the exact opposite of his statement. “Deke will think you are closed to him. You want to be open!”

Opening his arms and lowering his voice, the band’s instructor chilled out a bit, lulling the boys into a state of relaxation. Slowly, they sat back upright and uncrossed their arms out of their defensive positions, breathing a few shallow breaths in an attempt to calm down. Arms now fully out to their sides, her friends were still having trouble with the openness concept.

“Better.” Complimented Fong and the boys sighed in relief, forgetting about their open posture as they moved to relax. Which lead to another onslaught of biscuit attacks; each boy was relentlessly pelted, sending them straight back into their cowering positions huddled against each other. “No slouching!”

Roxy tried not to focus on the disgusting biscuit trail piling up in the studio. Just another thing she would inevitably end up cleaning later this evening.

Slowing down his attack, Mr. Fong decided to switch up his technique. This time instead of correcting the boys’ posture, he would call out a pose for the four to strike. “Show me! Deke thinks you are… engaged.”

Kendall, Logan, and James crossed one leg over the other, placing one elbow on their knee with their chin in their hand. Definitely engaged posture, definitely not Big Time Rush posture. Attempting to follow, Carlos propped his feet up on the fire pit and clasped his hands together as he raised them, obscuring the lower half of his face. His saving grace was his sincere, unwavering eye contact.

“He thinks you are…cool!”

Each boy moved into a new pose in order to fit their new prompt - James with a collar pop, Carlos with open arms and a mysterious pout, Logan with two finger guns, and Kendall with a side eye and smirk while leaning on his knee.

“Eclectic!”

No one knew what Mr. Fong meant by this, which was evidenced by the way the band positioned themselves. Kendall hopped onto the back of the couch and crossed his legs while pretending to meditate, Logan kicked his feet up on the fireplace and lazily munched on a biscuit, Carlos managed to do a headstand among the pillows with his legs straight up in the air, while James stood with his back to their instructor, head tilted to the side for some mystery.

“You four are so weird,” Roxy commented, grabbing a biscuit from the chair beside hers and taking a small bite.

“Smoking hot!” This seemed to come most naturally, not surprising at all to the assistant. Both Logan and Carlos chose to showcase their biceps; Logan with a curl and coy point to his muscle, while Carlos propped his elbow on the firepit and flexed to show off his veins. To their right, James crossed his ankles over the firepit as well before crossing his arms back behind his head, a defined pout showing off his sharp cheekbones. Finally, to the left, Kendall had crossed his legs and let his arms splay out over the back of the sofa with a dreamy smile gracing his features.

At least they know they’re attractive and can appropriately show it off.

“Now you are ready for your day with Deke.” Mr. Fong declared, pressing his palms together and bowing to his students.

A weak cheer of celebration was let out among the band, clearly tired after their long training session. The five were more than eager to head back to the Palm Woods to get this interview over with in the upcoming day.

“Boys,” One of the marketing execs spoke while the remaining branches of Rocque Records filed into the studio. Their message was clear: “This is a test you cannot fail.”

“You need to make this a day Deke will never forget.” The other exec added.

The writer giggled to herself, Be careful what you wish for.

Fong chimed in, “What he thinks is what is.”

“And remember!” Gustavo called through the doorway, making his way in front of the large group. “Our album comes out in a few months and the web is a powerful tool that can take BTR right to the top, and Deke is a powerful man.”

***

Once the band got home, Roxy rushed out to the pool and made the interview location as similar to the studio's as possible. The boys followed, sitting down and relaxing while their assistant was wigging out. Everything needed to go perfectly, and she wasn’t about to take a chance on a stray leaf or palm frond distracting her friends. Admittedly, the area was far more crowded with pool goers than she would’ve liked, but it would have to do for now. Carefully lighting the fire for ambiance despite it being the middle of the day, she made sure not to add too much wood, before lifting Kendall’s wrist to check the time on his watch.

“It’s time!” Her eyes widened as they examined the hands against the dark clock face. “You four, don’t move, I’ll go get Deke. We’ve got this, okay?”

There was no time to wait for their response as she sped out of the pool area, through the lobby, and out into the parking lot to wait for the famous blogger to arrive.

Not long after, a black town car approached the curb, and from the backseat emerged a young man. Of course, she instantly recognized him but was shocked to find that the short cardboard cut-out the Rocque Records marketing team had made was actually life-size. Walking over to meet him, she practically looked down on the boy as she spoke.

“Mr. Deke? It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m Roxanne Somerset. If you don’t mind following me, I’ll take you to meet Big Time Rush.”

The blogger didn’t say anything, he merely followed her into the lobby a few steps behind.

Looking over her shoulder, she noticed his interesting setup. A white harness hung from his shoulders, forming a tray in the middle of his chest where his laptop sat at a comfortable writing height. It was quite an efficient contraption, however, the assistant struggled with understanding how it was better than any other normal flat surface. Maybe she had just grown accustomed to writing in the strangest places.

Finally, the pair approached the band who were doing their best to act nonchalant and aloof when in reality, they couldn’t stop glancing over to the blogger as he arrived.

Sweeping her hand across the space, she gave a brief introduction. “Here we are! Please let me know if I can grab you anything, alright? Anything at all.”

From then on, it was up to the boys to use their charm to wow Deke. She sat a comfortable distance away on one of the pool lounge chairs, pretending to flip through her journal as she listened in to make sure everything went smoothly.

“So, you guys are Big Time Rush?” Deke deadpanned, sounding more unenthusiastic than he looked.

Laughter from Carlos jolted her ears, causing her to peek over to see him point at the blogger, “You’re so tiny!”

Her palm flew to her face as she heard the rapid typing of keys after the boy’s statement. The other three tried to distract the blogger in their “cool” poses while answering his first and easiest question with a nod.

After that, the blogger asked his second question - just like the marketing team had predicted. “So, how would you describe BTR’s music?”

Kendall nailed it, just like he had been taught. “Big Time Rush is a fun mix of rock and pop, with a dash of R&B!”

More typing, then onto Logan. “What would you be doing if you weren’t in a pop band?”

Hockey, say hockey, hockey… Gripping her book a bit tighter, Roxy tried to telepathically will the answer to her friend.

“Uh…” The boy pretended to think, before hopping onto the cushions and imitating his “favorite” sport. “Snowboarding! It’s kind of my thing. You know… half-pipe…”

Still staring at her journal page, she could just feel Carlos and Kendall flashing their “engaged” pose.

“And who are you?” Deke asked.

The final boy chuckled, ruffling his squeaky leather jacket before answering in a sultry voice. “Me? I’m James.”

Finally hearing enough, the girl grabbed her pen from her bag and scribbled a quick note out onto the page. Holding it up over Deke’s head, she saw the boys take notice.

Have fun

BE YOURSELVES!!

Kendall shot her a wink, and finally, she allowed herself a moment of relaxation. To the band’s credit, they truly were interesting and fun people, they just needed to get over what Gustavo had told them and let loose. It would make for a more raw, real interview their fans would love to get a hold of. She knew she certainly would.

A blonde, wavy head of hair moving in the lobby caught Roxy’s attention, pulling her attention away from the blogger. Squinting a bit more, Roxy spotted Jo, who must’ve been arriving from her afternoon audition. Taking a quick look over to the band, they were in their “smoking hot” positions, so they would probably be fine if she went and said hi to her friend quickly.

Placing her things on the lounge chair so no one else would take it, Roxy sped into the lobby.

“Jo!” She called, hoping to reach her friend before the elevator door closed.

Thankfully, the actress heard her and stepped out to greet her. “Hey, I haven’t seen you at all today!”

“You would not believe what the band is up to right now!” Roxy gushed, finding it hard to contain her delight. “They’re having a day with Deke!”

Jo’s eyes widened, “No way… This is going to be so good for them! Did you read his article last week about All I Ever Wanted? The new Kelly Clarkson album? Love his writing as I do, he was so wrong about the title track being the best song. It’s clearly ‘Already Gone.’”

“I’m more of a ‘My Life Would Suck Without You’ girl myself-”

“Woah, woah, woah, wait! Deke!”

Heads turned as the band ran through the lobby entrance, blocking off the young writer from leaving. In his hands were his laptop and a familiar leather-bound journal.

Roxy’s heart stopped the moment she noticed a right red pen sticking out of the front cover. There was no reason for Deke to have that in his possession.

The assistant gestured to the commotion, trying to keep her breathing steady. “Gotta run, talk later?”

Jo nodded, heading up the stairs to her apartment. “Text me when your phone’s fixed!”

With that, Roxy marched over to the boys, standing with crossed arms behind Deke. As they stood sandwiching him in, it was obvious that something in the interview had gone awry. The members of her band had panicked looks on their faces, chests heaving, shaking arms being held out to stop the writer from leaving. From what she could tell Deke looked annoyed, but he was probably used to temperamental interviewees after a bad review. Either way, she had to defuse the situation to save the band’s future and figure out why Deke was in possession of her songbook.

No biggie.

“We’re sorry!” Kendall apologized, the usual confidence with which he spoke dissipating faster by the second. “That wasn’t us out there.”

Clasping his hands together, James brought them to his chest. “Just give us a second chance.”

“And you can’t leave yet! It’s a ‘Day with Deke.’” Logan added.

Carlos crossed his arms, nodding. “Yeah! Not ‘Five Minutes with Deke’!”

Eyes flickering to each of the members of BTR, Roxy tried to figure out something to say to convince the blogger to stay but most of her thoughts were consumed with worry as Deke manhandled her book tighter to his chest.

“My blog seeks the truth, and the truth here is, you’re nothing but overdressed corporate pot-bots! If anything in this journal is better than your current pop-trash music I’ll consider upping my five-star rating from a .25 to a .5!” The laugh that followed made Roxy’s stomach turn. “Now, I am going back to the coffee shop to proof this and then post it to my blog and tell everyone that Big Time Rush is a big waste of time.”

A solution finally entered the girl's mind after being blank for what felt like hours. The guys were blocking the front door, she was blocking the entrance to the pool, and the janitorial closet stood smack in the middle of them - precisely where Deke was standing. It was entirely impractical to trap him, and maybe even illegal to hold him against his will, but her heart was drumming so fast in her ears that she didn’t have time to examine the idea critically.

Taking a few silent steps back, she took off running, building up speed and momentum with each step before aggressively slamming into the blogger from behind. Both of them stumbled from the unexpected force of the impact, but Roxy was somehow able to keep her balance as she reached to throw the closet door open, using Deke’s downward trajectory to shove him forward - right inside the open door - before slamming it, locking it, and pressing her back against it to prevent him from escaping.

Her friends gaped at her, watching in silence as her breathing rapidly became more and more rugged. After her initial adrenalin wore off, she let go of her white-knuckled grip on the door frame and sunk to the floor. Staring at her shoes, she felt tears pool up in her eyes; just the thought of someone reading her deeply private and personal journal entries and examining her songs before they were even complete was enough to send her into a full-blown panic.

“How’d he get it?”

The question came out barely more than a whisper, but she knew the four boys heard her.

For a while, no one said anything. Everyone did their best to process the situation in their own way.

“We need to disconnect the Wi-Fi so Deke can’t post his blog from here,” Logan said, grabbing Carlos by the sleeve. The tension between the band and their assistant was palpable, no wonder he wanted an out.

The other boy nodded, “I’ll get the cable TVs, telephones, air-conditioning, and all the garden hoses.”

In a flash, they were gone.

Deke pounded on the door a few times in order to capture the attention of any passers-by, but it was a Friday afternoon in Hollywood. No one was wasting their time lounging around in the hotel lobby.

“You can’t stop the truth!” He yelled from inside, the sound bouncing around the room a bit leaving a lasting echo on the words that were already rattling around Roxy’s brain.

This was a pretty bad time for the reality of the situation to set in, but for whatever reason the proper cogs in Roxy’s mind were set into motion.

“Ah!” She cried, shooting straight up, running her hands through her hair before they settled on the back of her head. “I just did that… I just did that! I just put us on a one-way flight back to Minnesota! Surely, after this review gets posted and we bomb, Gustavo is going to fire us, we’ll never get to make music again and you guys will hate me and-”

“Roxanne.” Kendall cut her off, placing his hands on her shoulders and bending down to her eye level. “I gave it to him.”

That sure shut her up.

Feeling the cold wood of the door against her back, she shifted, looking over to James for a bit of help. Either she broke her silence and verbally abused one of her closest friends for betraying her trust and potentially ruining her life or she turned around and unlocked the door to let Deke run free and post his exposé. Admittedly, that last option was looking pretty good right about now.

“He did it with good intention.” James tried, but his words fell flat as he watched his assistant shove his best friend off of her.

The blond raised his hands in defense, taking a few steps back.

A few tears threatened to spill over, clouding Roxy’s vision as she looked anywhere but at the boy in front of her.

Shakily, she raised one of her hands and pinched the bridge of her nose to keep from the inevitable sniffles that came before a good cry. “I- I… don’t want to be around you right now.”

Kendall’s eyes hit the floor, stepping farther away from her. “I promise I’ll explain everything to you once this is over, okay?”

“If we ever get out of this- God, what have I done?”

“Done!” Carlos called from the front doors echoing his assistant’s last word, running back into the lobby with Logan. Each of them had a myriad of colorful wires wrapped around their bodies, ensuring nothing in the entire hotel was left plugged into any kind of socket, outlet, or nozzle.

Looking between the frontman and the assistant with a worried crinkle in his eye, Logan was about to say something, before a few more screams came from inside the room.

“Look!” Kendall gritted, speaking into the door right above the girl’s head. “If you just agree to spend the rest of the day with us like you promised…”

James picked up where his friend was failing too, “And let us prove that we’re not phonies…”

“We’ll let you out!” Chorused Logan and Carlos.

At least they were going to use the situation Roxy had created to their advantage.

“And…” She singsonged, attempting to sound sweet as if she didn’t just shove the boy in a janitor's closet to keep him from leaving and hadn’t been seconds away from throttling the band’s frontman. “I’ll give you first access to the next Big Time Rush hit if you just give me my journal back.”

A brief moment of silence washed over the teens before the blogger gave them an answer. “Okay, I will.”

Though the boys celebrated prematurely, the pained look on their assistant’s face told them to be mindful of what might happen next. Anyone trapped in Deke’s situation would surely do anything to escape it. Their next move would have to be carefully calculated.

Except, it wasn’t.

The columnist’s promise of a real interview thrilled her friends as Kendall promptly opened the door. Their assistant made sure to step back and out of the way in order to keep the focus on the band even though she wanted to be focused on grabbing her book.

Behind it was a smiling Deke, who seemed fully ready to conduct a real dialogue between himself and the band members. Watching as he took inventory of the lobby quickly, the blogger spotted a gap between Logan and Carlos before his smile disappeared, replaced with a grimace as he attempted to run in between them to escape. However, the attempt was to no avail as the four boys took hold of Deke’s arms and shoved him right back into the closet he came from.

While the band stood in front of the locked door to block it once more, shoulder to shoulder, they heard the boy’s voice ring from inside the small room.

“As soon as I get internet access, you guys are big time finished!” Roxy pressed the heel of her palms to her eyes as she turned up towards the ceiling. It was her fault they were in this mess; she had let her selfishness get the best of her when her friends were having one of the biggest moments in their careers. Because of her one bad move, their band and quite possibly their friendship were in shambles.

She didn’t even know where to begin, “Look, guys…”

As she glanced at each of them down the line in front of her, the words got caught in her throat.

All Roxy could muster was a hoarse, “I’m so sorry.”

There weren’t any responses to accept it. Something she didn’t blame them for, especially after she had potentially erased months of hard work and dedication to their dream.

“Well, let’s look on the bright side,” Kendall said sarcastically, trying to mask the slight tremor in his voice. “This is definitely a day Deke will never forget.”

Understatement of the century.

Slowly the band began to move away from being pressed against the door; it was locked after all. James and Kendall took a seat on the bench beside one of the palm tree fixtures in the lobby as Carlos and Roxy took a seat in front of the door with Logan standing in between the pairs.

It took everything the girl had not to let her emotions explode and burst out of her as she laid her head on Carlos’ shoulder.

“Roxy?” Logan questioned, peering down at his friend. “I think we’ve all figured out that you don’t like people looking over your shoulder when you write our songs, but there’s got to be something else in that journal to make you react so strongly to this situation. I think you owe us just a bit of an explanation to help us understand why you acted the way you did.”

Biting the inside of her cheek to keep from spitting out “I don’t owe you shit!” she shifted her back on the door uncomfortably as she looped her arm inside of Carlos’ for a bit of moral support.

It was a long story, one she certainly didn’t want to tell in front of a world-famous web blogger but understood how clarity could help them understand her situation. They were her friends, they wanted what was best for her, and she needed to remember that; friends didn’t judge each other.

“For two years now, since I've formally begun songwriting, I’ve used those books as a creative outlet. It doubles as a writing tool and as a diary, so I can reflect on my personal thoughts and feelings to provide real-world context to my songs. Like, I wrote ‘Big Time Rush’ using what I had written down the night of our auditions and ‘Halfway There’ with my entries from our first month in Hollywood.”

Roxy gripped her friend’s arm a bit tighter.

“At my first high school, I had a music class with a few people who were looking to start a band, and I… ended up falling pretty hard for one of them…”

The silence following her first statement urged her to continue.

“Mag, the singer, could play guitar too, so really, looking back on it now, I think he was just looking for something to set us apart from all the other teen-fronted bands in Duluth: Original songs. So when he noticed me messing around on my guitar and writing in my journal during free period, he came over and told me about a band he was forming with a friend called Brand New Day.”

I hate this, I hate this, I hate this!

“He was… you know… talented, attractive, inspiring… And I ended up writing a smattering of songs for the band and a few songs… about him in hopes he would realize how I felt and eventually, as Brand New Day started to play more and more gigs I kinda figured he liked me too… So one day, when Dani ended up running late for practice, I made the mistake of handing my book over to Mag while I set up my equipment.”

Eyes peering over at her made her feel a bit like a caged animal; it made her skin crawl as she pulled her knees into her chest.

“I don’t remember much after that, because when I found Mag again he was practically rolling on the floor from laughter. Saying this and that about how dumb I was to think he ever-” Roxy couldn’t even form the proper words. “The possibility of him going back and reading my journal entries hadn’t even crossed my mind… Anyway, that was the last time I was involved with a band. I ended up running out, leaving my book, and crying in my dad’s arms for so long that he enrolled me in a completely different school from Mag and Dani.” At this point, the shake in her voice she had been trying to hide finally made its way through as she continued speaking, “Last I heard they’d caught the attention of a few east coast labels after winning a statewide battle of the bands with one of the songs I had written. Earnedned themselves a support slot on some alt band’s bill and toured the midwest for a few months.”

“Oh, man…” James trailed off before his jaw clenched. There was a slight grit to his voice as he looked her dead in the eye, promising, “Roxy, nothing like that is ever going to happen to you again.”

Above her, Logan just shook his head.

“At the time, it was really hard and I blamed myself for everything that had happened. Like, there was a reason they were getting to live my dream, while I was stuck hurting at home.” His assistant finally pushed out, “I’ve come to peace with it now, but it took me almost a year to even get back into music. Honestly, I think seeing the ad for Gustavo’s audition was when I finally decided to try and write again. But ultimately it’s why I’m so protective over my book. I trust you guys! I really, really, do, but every time I catch someone watching me write or peeking over my shoulder all these painful memories come flooding back to me… And now it’s going to happen all over again once Deke gains internet access.”

Taking her hand, Carlos quickly shook his head. “No, it isn’t. We won’t let that happen.”

“Then we need to end this,” Roxy affirmed, squeezing her friend’s hand to let him know she appreciated his comment. “We can’t let him out, so what do we do now?”

Kendall shrugged, placing his head to rest on the wall while he took in the information he had just received. The girl hoped he wasn’t beating himself up for handing over her journal, he had no way of knowing what had happened to her and certainly wouldn’t have had he.

After some time to think through her feelings, she found her anger at his earlier actions resigning.

With a sigh, the blond tried one more thing: An honest plea.

“Look, we just want a chance to change the way you think about us.”

“Fine. I’ll interview you through the door.” The blogger’s voice said quite quickly, most likely anxious to get this over and done with.

Even if it was another trick, this was the band’s best bet for any semblance of a positive article written about them. They stood up in celebration, joining Logan across from the door as their assistant stayed in place, determined to do nothing else to affect the status of their job.

“What made you decide to come to L.A.?”

“Um, well, we didn’t really plan on this.” Began the frontman. “But when amazing opportunities come, you have to-”

Deke cut him off abruptly. “Could someone elaborate on that?”

“Sure!” Jumped in James, more than happy to continue his friend’s story. “It was my dream to be a pop star, but my buds helped me get to the audition where we met our songwriter-assistant, Roxy-”

“Where do you see yourself in 20… years…?”

Deke’s voice began to slow, growing deeper and confusing the teens.

“Oh, oh! His battery died!” Logan cried before a realization dawned upon him. “Wait, wait!”

Roxy leaped up, heart beating out of her chest, undoing the lock on the front of the door and flinging it open.

In the room stood a tall, blue ladder with a shiny tape recorder laying intricately on the gear Deke normally used to hold his laptop suspended from on of the steps. Slowly letting her eyes follow the upward leading lines of the A-frame, an open ventilation grate told the five that Deke was long gone - crawling around in the building vents for who knows how long.

“He’s in the ducts!” Announced James, causing the four to let out their own aggravated sounds.

The band scrambled after him, not knowing which direction to go in, and soon Roxy was trailing behind her friends looking out for any sign of life in the ceiling above them.

At least he didn’t hear my sob story.

“All I have to do is find a hardwired computer and expose the big-time truth!”

A voice, one they had grown to know well, exasperated from the air duct above their heads. They had found him just in the nick of time.

James was the first to spot him, halting under the grating that allowed the teens to look up and spy the blogger on his hands and knees crawling by. “Well, the truth is, we do so sing! Observe!”

Beginning with Kendall, the boys harmonized in the chord of C major. For a moment, the girl wished Gustavo was there to hear it before remembering if he knew anything about the situation the band had found themselves in they’d all be fired immediately.

“Not bad.” The boy in the ducts mused, looking down on Team BTR. “But I will destroy you!”

Deke attempted to crawl away, but now that the teens had him in their sight they weren’t going to let up.

“I feel so spiny, and, man, it’s so hot in here.” They heard, following the sound of the blogger’s struggle down one of the first-floor hallways.

Though it was a long shot, Roxy did her best to help as her assistant instincts kicked in. “Do you want some water?”

He looked through the vents, intrigued, “Do you have sparking?”

“Um,” She began, checking her surroundings before answering. Typically, she kept a normal water bottle in her bag, but that was currently sitting out by the pool. With that out, the only thing around them were hotel rooms. Guest rooms, not resident apartments - those began on the second floor. Turning the handle to the room closest, it clicked open. Quickly, she prayed there was a guest mini-fridge. “Yes, just a moment.”

Stepping in, she scanned the room which didn’t appear to be occupied. Just her luck, a mini-fridge sat in front of the kitchenette with a full array of drinks, including the one she needed. Grabbing the fancy, plastic bottle in one hand, she grabbed a Peppy Cola in the other. She deserved something for surviving the last half hour from hell.

Once she ran back into the hall, she passed the sparkling water off to Carlos and pointed to the vent.

The boy caught her drift and yelled “Catch!” before he chucked the bottle upwards through the gaps in the metal grate.

Everyone had a few seconds to pause while Deke drank his water and Roxy sipped on her soda.

“Ha!” Deke huffed, catching their attention before crawling off in a new direction. “Later, losers!”

Running off once more, the band and their assistant followed a calamity of banging, clattering, and swearing as the blogger made his way through the hotel ducts. The end of the building drew closer and closer, but this did not stop the boy as the group followed his noises outside. Eventually, they ended up in the back alley of the hotel where the duct dropped off to cool the basement.

A fact Deke did not find out until he slipped down the metal, screaming all the way down before colliding with the bottom of the duct.

“He just…” Roxy tried, faltering as she thought of all the damage the fall could’ve caused. They were so dead.

Kendall appeared to have the same thoughts as his assistant. “So, um, what are we looking at here?”

“False imprisonment, involuntary manhunting…” Answered Logan. “I’d say at least 100 hours’ community service.”

“That’s not too bad.” She attempted to justify her earlier actions. “Right?”

James sucked in a breath. “Yeah, that’s pretty bad.”

A scuttling noise began in the ducts, the sound of metal clanging traveled up the pipes as the five looked on in confusion.

“Is he going back up?” Carlos wondered aloud, saying what each of his friends were thinking.

“Wheeee!”

A bang from the bottom let them know Deke had made it down once more.

When the sound of movement ceased, Carlos panicked, “Which way did he slide?”

Once more, the teens were off again to find out where the blogger was headed to hopefully intercept him and prevent their terrible interview from being published.

“We can’t lose him!” James yelped. “He thinks we’re big-time phonies!”

The ducts they followed ended up meeting in some kind of central unit, silvery pathways went in each and every direction to reach all parts of the building. More noises rang out from one of the connecting avenues telling them where Deke was headed; he was crawling in the vent right above their heads which just so happened to lead back into the building.

It was then the band found themselves in a dead end. There was no door leading back into the building from where they stood. Now, they’d have to backtrack in order to find him again.

“The computer lab!” Roxy gasped, remembering it as one of the many rooms down the hall from their classroom at Palm Woods High. “He’s heading in that direction. Do we trap him in there too?”

“We could,” Logan began, tapping his chin while he examined his surroundings. After a moment, he pointed to a bright blue can to the side of the hotel, “Or, we could trap him in a recycling bin and just wheel him out of the hotel on our own time.”

“That’s a terrible idea,” She replied, thinking it would only add to their community service time. “But the computers have an ethernet connection and he’ll be able to upload without wifi if we don’t get him out.”

The boys shook their heads.

“Recycling can it is then.”

For the record, the girl felt awful as she saw Logan’s plan unfold before her own eyes. Somehow they had managed to reach the lab ahead of the blogger, setting up the bin right under the only air duct in the room. The sound of a person crawling in the vents drew closer and closer until eventually the metal grate had been ripped off the hinges and the boy lowered himself down into the room - right into the band’s trap. They had just been lucky Deke had spotted the computers or they might have lost him again.

“Darn, it!” He screamed, realizing he had fallen into a trap.

Before the boys snapped the lid shut, Roxy was sure to lean over the ledge, looking down at the blogger curled up in the bottom. Wordlessly, she snatched her book out of his hands.

Finally. She thought. A moment of peace.

***

“Life’s funny, you know?” Carlos reflected, kicking back on the semi-circle couch by the firepits with his friends.

Wheeling around the bin with the blogger in it, the five had stopped for smoothies at the café before finally settling down in the back of the pool area. They knew they were done for, but for now, they allowed themselves a bit of relaxation on what very well could be their last hours at the Palm Woods hotel.

“One day you’re hockey players,” He continued, “And you meet a cool songwriter, and then you’re a pop band-”

“Then blognappers.” Chimed in Logan.

The can in front of them rattled, but Deke didn’t say anything.

Taking a long sip of her smoothie, Roxy sighed. “It could be worse. Someone in Los Angeles somewhere is definitely having a worse day than we are.”

Beside her, James nodded in agreement before sharing his thoughts. “Why does he think we’re phonies, hm? He should like us!”

“Why would he like us?” Kendall questioned, rolling his eyes. “Because I’ve got to be honest: I don’t like us right now.”

Their songwriter bowed her head in shame, agreeing with his assessment.

Continuing, the blond hopped out of his seat and made his way over to the bin trapping the blogger. “Worse than that, since when did we start caring about what people think about us? It’s what we think about ourselves that matters.”

“I think we might have let the marketers put words in our mouths.” Carlos stood in solidarity with Kendall.

Slowly, the assistant rose as well, “I think I let my past cloud our present.”

Soon after, Logan joined them. “I think Mr. Fong’s biscuits may have caused temporary insanity.”

The bin Kendall was leaning on rattled once more, “Ho-ho, finally a true statement!”

Comment going ignored, the frontman blinked. “And do you guys realize we never even questioned these outfits?”

“I think we look good!” James popped up off the couch as well.

More rattling, “It’s a little overdone.”

“Quiet, you!”

Still leaning on the can, Kendall took in his friend’s words. “We are not four hockey players, and a songwriter, from Minnesota anymore. We are five Anakins who went to the dark side.”

He slapped the can for effect, forgetting Deke was inside. “Ow!”

“So…” Roxy began.

The rest of the band finished for her, “What do we do?”

Their solution was one that didn’t need to be spoken; the five of them understood the trouble their actions had caused and the negative repercussions it would bring. At the present, there was no longer a need to prolong their pain.

Silently, Team BTR wheeled the bin through the hotel lobby and out the front doors. The can lid was opened and Deke was pulled out by the boys. His gear was returned by a few of the band members before everyone stepped back, giving him some well-needed space.

“The truth is, with our album coming out soon, there’s a lot of pressure, and it kind of got to us.” Kendall shared with the blogger in a last attempt to make a good impression. Not that it mattered to the band any longer.

James nodded in agreement, “We hope you can forgive us.”

“Truly, we’re so sorry for the trouble we’ve caused you.” The writer apologized.

“And we hope you don’t press charges!” Logan half-joked, his stressed laugh betraying his serious intentions with the statement while he poked finger guns at the web author.

With his gear returned, Deke stretched out his arms and legs for a few moments as he listened to what the teens told him. “Wow, you’ve really given me something to think about… right after I post my blog about how I was locked in a closet, tackled, chased through ducts, and trapped in a garbage can!”

There was no room for goodbye as Deke ran as fast as his little legs would carry him - across the parking lot and out onto Barham Boulevard. He didn’t even wait for a red light before crossing the road, simply running out into traffic and hoping he would make it across.

“Hey, you never know.” James started, trying to lighten the mood. “Maybe he’ll get hit by a bus on the way to his coffee shop.”

From the street, there was the sound of horns honking and tires squealing to a halt. The smell of burning rubber followed. No screams, however, suggesting the blogger was just fine.

“Good he’s out of sight.” Sighed Roxy, allowing her body to relax after the sounds startled her. “Bad that bus wasn’t close enough.”

***

After the entire blogger fiasco, the band and their assistant decided it was a good idea for them to visit Rocque Records and discuss their failure of an interview with their bosses. When the choice of being fired sooner than later meant they wouldn’t have to face Gustavo yelling at them too far into the future, they decided it was best to just get it over with and pack to head back home.

Arriving at Rocque Records, the five took the elevator up to Gustavo’s office only to find the entire path there riddled with garbage. There were a multitude of signs relating to both brussels sprouts and the city of Brussels as well as signs proclaiming their hatred for Gustavo Rocque.

“Looks like I was right…” The writer thought aloud. “Someone somewhere in Los Angles was having a worse day than us.”

Once they reached the producer’s office, he and Kelly exited, haggard looks on their faces.

“Well, I have a feeling your album’s not gonna sell very well in Belgium.” The man said, covered in a smattering of frozen waffles and maple syrup.

The band clasped their hands together, trying to find any type of forgiveness from the adults. “Yeah, about the album…”

Through their overlapping stories, Kelly and Gustavo jumped, excitedly remembering the mission the teens had been sent on today. “Your day with Deke!”

Here we go…

Not even waiting to hear their employees out, the pair ran into Gustavo’s office and booted up the computer hurriedly.

“Mr. Rocque… before you read the blog…” Roxy tried to get her word in and take as much responsibility for her actions as possible but was cut off by rude shushing from her employers.

“‘The Big Time Truth:’” Read the man. “‘After lies about snowboarding, corporate-written sound bites, and being locked in a supply closet, I knew within my first five minutes that Big Time Rush were big time phonies.’”

There was a gap between his speaking and mental processing before screaming, “You locked him in a supply closet?!”

“Yup.” The boys chorused, not throwing their assistant under the bus.

Gustavo threw himself over his desk, reaching out to try and grab whichever boy he could and pummel them. Thankfully, Kelly was able to hold him back as she read the rest of the article. “‘But’- Hey!- ‘The rest of my day was literally… a big time rush.'”

The teen’s eyes blew wide, all leaning in closer to the desk as Logan turned the computer monitor, reading the next bit aloud, “‘And not just because of 20-foot-high heating duct slides, garbage can rides, and sparkling water delivered upon request by a beautiful songwriter-assistant.’”

Roxy felt her cheeks heat up as the band glanced over at her.

To her right, Carlos pulled the device closer to him, “‘But in discovering that Big Time Rush are four dedicated, smart, and fun-loving guys who share a passion for music and life.’’

Monitor now centered on her, she felt James’ arm brush past her as he pointed toward the ending. “‘My day with Big Time Rush is one I’ll never forget!’”

Kendall placed a hand on his assistant’s shoulder, leaning in to catch the final line, “‘And I’m looking forward to hearing their new album.’”

Hardly able to contain her excitement, Roxy giggled as her friend finished the last line, causing a small eruption of celebration from the band along with it. Their boss gave them a few seconds of party time before calling them back to reality

“Okay, okay, now that my dawgs have crushed phase two of our big-time web attack, let’s go back to phase one and make some web videos for the Big Time Rush website.”

Kelly handed each boy a camera similar to the ones they had been given before, they were now wrapped in a hardshell protective case. “And this time, try not to break the cameras.”

“Got it!” Everyone assured her.

Headed back home, the five arrived in the lobby of the Palm Woods.

Jobs secured, Deke won over, and web attack imminent, Roxy broke off from the guys to have some much-needed alone time in her apartment.

After all the trouble her actions had caused that day, she owed the boys big time, but wasn’t sure how to repay the kindness they had given her. Instead of blowing up on her and blaming the situation she had created on her at their meeting, they had stood up for her and prevented any incoming Gustavo harm from coming her way. For that, she was grateful.

Entering her room, the girl flopped down on her bed and recounted the events of the day. Her hand itched, wanting to write everything down, so she pulled out the book that had caused all of their troubles and scribbled out everything she could remember.

***

An hour later, Roxy’s piano practice was interrupted by a knock at her front door. A quick glance through the peephole revealed a familiar tuft of blond hair, to which she quickly opened the door and invited her friend inside with a kind greeting.

The boy shuffled in holding a plate of Snickerdoodle cookies which he gingerly set on her kitchen counter. “My mom made extra, figured you might want a few.”

Following him into the small space that held her appliances, Roxy nodded. “I’d never say no to free cookies.”

Picking one of the giant treats up, she broke it in half, offering the other side to Kendall.

“So…” He started, accepting her offer and taking a bite of his half. “We finished our first web video for the site. It was kind of weird doing something with the band and not having you around.”

“You four are the ones with the talent contracts.”

So awkward. She thought. He’s not normally like this.

Clearly, there was something he wanted to tell her but felt trapped by social convention to make small talk before diving into whatever it was.

After everything that had happened between them that day, she had already forgiven him for handing over her book. If anything, the whole situation was on her for not setting clear boundaries with the band.

He took another bite before mumbling, “True, true.”

Silence fell over the small apartment, allowing the girl to try the cookie for herself. The moment it hit her tongue, she instantly knew that this was the best cookie she had ever, and probably would ever, taste. Swirling flavors of cinnamon and pure sugar melted in her mouth - an undefeated flavor profile.

Kendall cleared his throat, pulling her from her thoughts. “Listen… about earlier. I just wanted to say I’m-”

“No, no.” She cut him off. “I’m sorry for what I said to you! It’s my fault for not setting clear boundaries.”

Her comment seemed to confuse him as he knitted his eyebrows, looking at her intently. “You think what happened is your fault?”

“Well, yeah. I never explicitly told you not to look in my journal or anything.”

“And I should know better than to go digging around in people’s personal items.” The frontman assured her, running a hand through his hair. “Will you give me the chance to explain a bit?”

With a nod, she nibbled on her cookie a bit more.

“After you left during the interview, it was very clear that Deke wasn’t into what we had to say at all. He called us big time-phonies or something, threatening to publish a review saying we were a bunch of posers from the Midwest who were trying to make it big like everyone else in this town. So, in a weird way, it made me think of our first day here, when you wrote ‘Big Time Rush’ and practically solidified our place at Rocque Records.

“I thought the book was full of songs, I had no idea it was a diary or that having it out of your possession would drag up painful memories. All I know is that your songs always save us, so I thought showing what was to come for BTR would help Deke like us more. I didn’t know the little weirdo would try and take it from us to analyze and pick apart the contents like he did to us.”

After his little speech, he slowed down, allowing Roxanne time to process everything he had said.

“Bottom line,” He concluded. “It’s not your fault I invaded your privacy. I’m sorry, Rox. For today, and for what happened to you back home. Both Mag and I are massive, massive dicks.”

Truth be told, Roxy always hated when people apologized to her. It was a natural reflex at this point to respond “It’s okay” or “Don’t worry about it” even if it was something that had deeply upset her.

“Thank you.” The girl grinned, looking up at her friend. From his tone of voice, it was clear he meant every word he said. “I’m sorry I made you an accessory to kidnapping.”

This elicited a little chuckle from the frontman, “There’s a first time for everything! It was pretty cool, honestly, it was like you were our team’s enforcer or something.”

Internalizing the presumed hockey term, she’d have to ask Logan about it later.

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Roxy joked, flipping her hair over her shoulder in silent victory.

Another silence filled the room, this one far more comfortable to the content pair as they finished their conversation.

The band and their assistant were more than grateful to sleep another night in the City of Angels. Now, they just needed to focus on surviving the next few months until the album release.

“The guys and I are gonna stay in and have a Super Smash Bros. tournament tonight if you wanna come join us.” He offered, tilting his head towards the wall their apartments shared.

His assistant sucked in a breath before sarcastically stating, “Wow, you really know how to tempt a girl… Too bad I was planning on heading to the mall to get my phone from the repair shop. You four should come with me! And if you take your mom’s car keys we don’t have to take the bus.”

“You’ve got it.” He didn’t even hesitate to accept her offer. “But you’ve got to take us to Griffith Park afterward, Carlos has been pestering us about going to take pictures in front of the Hollywood Sign. I’m not sure he knows those are in two separate places, but it’ll still be a fun evening regardless.”

What a great idea, wherever we go we can take a good picture for the website.

Snatching her bag off the kitchen table, she headed to her door and gestured toward the hallway, “Deal!”

#thats all she wrote fic #big time rush #btr #james diamond #james maslow #kendall knight #kendall schmidt #logan mitchell #logan henderson #carlos garcia #carlos penavega

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