#im infodumping to myself so that everyone can see and i think thats funny

[stitchwraith-stingers]

i read in the flesh, so you dont have to

its no secret that in the flesh is one of the only things fnaf fans know about fazbear frights and its imfamous for its story (which i dont blame people to be disgusted about)

but have you ever wondered what it was plot-wise but you couldnt have been bothered to read the summary on the wiki, couldnt find the book on your own to read or you just didnt want read the main reason people hate it? no? well too bad

as your local faz fright fan i decided to reread it and make a (incoherent) post made in 4 hours talking about it just because, small screenshots included (trying to not focus enterly on that)

(DONT MAKE "hahaha springtrap matpat mpreg" JOKES ON THIS POST I WILL KILL YOU)

(cw for pregnancy mention and matt being an ass to women in general)

everything under cut

now the story just starts out with matt, our protag, telling us all about how hard game making is for a page or two, theres nothing interesting of note moving on

now right after this hes playing his game, springtraps revenge, a VR game which is just a maze with puzzles where you have to escape springtrap, and 1. i got jumpscared by him describing springtrap as hannabel lecter and 2. the fact that springtrap is described as 'a child of his rage' which i just find hilarious in a ironic way

now in the game hes in a maze and he has to escape using 4 doors, and because its randomized he doesnt know which door would have the 1-in-4 chance of killing him, and long story short he looses! twice

he gets angry enough so that he throws his vr headset after the fact and when his coworker named jamie wanted to walk in to tell him hi he snaps at her

and immediatly after this we get afew paragrapths talking about matt and his previous wife, hannah

it starts off as cute, them both meeting in chemistry class in highschool, matt then started to have gotten bored of being married as it seemed to be the same thing every day, hannah having wanted kids and matt not wanting to

now he has the audacity to say that her being pregnant that she would loose her petite figure and that she had called him shallow and threw a glass of water on his face (HONESTLY very deserved)

and he had met some woman named brianna as a friend which had led to them divorcing after their annervary because of hannah seeing brianna in a bikini on his computer (hi matt, i dont believe you about you and brianna just being friends. at all. btw.)

women wronged by matt count: 1

(also i need to say this right now before anyone kills me: matt is written to be an asshole on purpose, i know that very well and it shows up how he treats people, i know its also in his perspective which is why everyone is described as it is, i know other protags have been assholes one way or another as most of my faves have been, i just dont like matt myself but if ur like one of the 3 matt fans ur cool with me and im not saying you cant like him just saying this so people dont tell me how dumb i am)

"Women were crazy, Matt had decided. And not worth the effort." GOOD RIDDANCE YOU ARE BITCHLESS

and now because of how lonely and frustrated he feels he uses his VR game as a way to deal with it, but with an actual quote "It was the cruelest of ironies that the game—much like his relationships —seemed to have turned against him."

ok but these quotes sound kinda metal. moving on

having been mad that springtrap killed him for the 3rd time this book he decides to change up the coding, so that springtrap can just, walk around forever in the maze and spedup the gameframe by 1000 so is like extra sad i guess, matt talks about himself like a god controlling a rabbit which i found kinda funny, (the voice of woody) YOU! ARE! SOME! GUY!

now here we meet the next important side-character called jason, hes matts roommate he seems friendly and they seem to be on good terms so far

he and jason watch TV and he thinks about how it was like in collage, "no complicated female emotions" having takeouts and TV and video games all day, however as time went by those feelings of being carefree are wearing off,

but thats unrelated as theyre watching the TV show he thinks about how violent it is and fantisizing how he wants to kill springtrap, which is hilarious to me.. “i saw him kill me in the vr game!!!” girl… what were YOU doing progamming him 👀 /ref

now a tiny timeskip, matt is back at his job and he is testing the VR game again, he is excited to see springtrap run around in circles like a lost child or whatever and gets a surprise

gonna be honest i think thats kinda metal how it sounds (if we ignore how the story is gonna continue for a moment) why is this the 3rd time i see disembowlment in a series i like.... 3rd penny.... werid it happened thrice

tldr springtrap has been making a clone of himself very so often and killing himself which is funny out of context because all it has as a game mechanic is to chase you and kill you, and the rabbit is now gone and apparently not in the code and considering matt has a deadline he is screwed and he goes in the vr game and just finds him . disembowled and gets an electrical shock

ANYWAYS. NOT IMPORTANT ITS TIME TO INVOLVE MORE WOMEN

jason has been setting up matt for a double date with two girls: eve and meghan, and matt is not happy that eve is his date (which im gonna assume its a blind date? not specified)

and the first thing he does is look at this girl, go "wow she fucking sucks" and starts thinking about the woman on his roommates date

"matt couldnt figure out why she didnt sound ehtusiastic" i am going to killl you........ and then kill you again

anyways they both take their own cars to the resturant, eve and matt just have a talk thats like "you work on fnaf? my brother loves fnaf" "what do you do" "IT, jason thought itd be nice of us to know" "tech is the last thing i want to think about when im home" "me too"

this made me giggle. moving on

matt and meghan get the same food while jason and eve get spaghetti and matt is just like "yknow what, maybe i should have gotten the hotter one"

so matt is like "cant have a goodtime without money" and eve is like "thats not true :>" and matt in his mind is like "what the hell, how could she do this to me"

now for the rest of the date matt just goes on and only talks about himself, eve and jason both go to the bathroom and this is where he starts to try to impress meghan

matt is that "you not rockin with me ?! im gonna kill myself" image personified

women wronged by matt count: 3

and now this is where the pregnancy symptons come in, feeling quesy, he drinks coffee and has toast and is sick, deciding to go to work untill lunchtime and nothing had worked at this point at all, nothing too interesting to point out here

obvously now matt is irritated again, given how he cannot fix the damn thing, gary, a unimportant guy you wont see him again after this, comes up to him and asks "heyyy watcha doing!!!!!!" meanwhile matt is trying not to throw up

(oh and also gary is described as having ken-doll like hair which is hilarious to me, love it when they give the most random descriptions to characters who will never appear again)

while hes waiting for gus to make his food he looks over at a totally-not-pacmac refrence from a arcade machine nearby and is like "oh i could have reprogrammed springtrap in, how couldnt have i thought of that" and how this time he 'wont antagonise the rabbit' which i find funny cuz in the game he IS the antag but i cant be bad

WE INTERUPPT YOUR BROADCAST OF MISOGENYSTIC GUY GETTING HIS WORK FUCKED OVER TO BRING YOU: GENE!!!!!!!!!

tldr this gene guy is a hacker and gets a copy of springtraps revenge before the release date and just finds a dead disembowled springtrap which i can only imagine as this fucking screenshot and its sending me

anyway he opens the files and just finds one named "its_a_boy.exe"

did you like gene? you did? too bad, were never gonna see this guy again, say bye to gene junior

back to your usual broadcasting of misogynistic guy getting fucked over at his job

now matt is on his 2nd date with a girl called madison, matt being so hungry, orders some real cooked steak and madison is like i just want a salad please ^_^ and matt asks about what madison eats and is shocked that she spilts a burger when with friends (cuz hes so hungry at this point)

these sentences amused me, moving on

also in this i realised whoever made that one post saying "i need these books to stop using the world belly" was right. who says "Well, you won’t hear it long because it’s going to be in my belly" on a date

belly counter: 1 (for good mesure)

he just, eats the steak for a good few paragrapths, lies about being anemic, madison leaves cuz her cat is sick, hes still so hungry, theres nothing else to note of here, moving on

he wakes up, notices that he has gained afew pounds and goes to throw up

jamie meets matt and matt is like "listen im nausiated alot and starving and gaining more weight do you know any virus like this" and jamie is like "idk but you look yellowish you might have jaundice dude"

and a meeting has started, gary (hi gary again i lied he comes back a 2nd time) is like "so the game is doing well, springtraps programming people have said isnt that well, thats what beta testers said idk" and matt is like "what the hell shut the fuck up ur making it up" "how about you not talk to ur supervisor like that" and he just zooms out of there idk

he goes home to eat, again, he is no longer hungry and: ladies and gentlemen welcome jason again!

GET HIS ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!! DESERVED

right after this based jason moment matt gets a headache, not before getting a beer oh my god i cant believe i forgot about the belly counter

belly counter: 3

anyways next mini arc, matt at this point cant put on most pants, but manages to find some for his next date, with a girl named emma

so he and emma are at a bar, matt noticing immediatly that she is ""chunky"" , leading to this convo

and nvm i cant post anymore images sorry guys ill have to put them in another reblog its so over link to that will be here if you wanna look at them

(1) emma sees him and is rightfully concerne about him leaving this early and matt goes. "you should have posted a image on a dating site not 25 pounds ago" OK. WHAT

and emma just goes . "you know you are a hypocrite right" meanwhile he is like "im leaving goodbye" and has a scene the equivalent of ripping ur pants out in public

(2) lol even

women wronged by matt count: 4

matt goes home, gets changed and tries to take medicine for pain relieve and instead gets more pain, leading to the infamous scene

but wait before that i almost forgot:

belly counter: 6

the infamous scene isnt that, bad? ive seen people act like if its some unspeakable horror

matt goes into the kitchen, grabs a knife, goes on his back and disembowls himself / gives himself a C-section or whatever, almost the same, and fleshtrap is born, or something

(3) i would have expected it to be afew more paragraths if this was the case w how people describe it, its like people going "look guys this CANT be a kids book it has PEOPLE DYING" and its just like this,

(not saying you cant be grossed out im talking about the guys on freddit making the most batshit theories talking about it like its some unspoken thing, thats what i mean)

(4) and it ends here on a, id say pretty nice ending, the investigators are asking what happened to matt with jason, noticing some slimy fur next to him, honestly on its own i like it tbh

and that was the end of in the flesh 👍

MY THOUGHTS:

it was ok, no strong opinions on this honestly, had some banger lines,

and my hot take but the pregnancy thing isnt really a pregnancy? i dont know how to describe it, but it was more like, a whole entity growinh up the whole body and not like, just from the abdomen which would have been described differently, to me atleast thats how i saw it idk i might be wrong

considering it seemed to have been fully grown enough to be able to move on its own and speak, and the fact that it was described as something INSIDE him (5) so idk, idk

and it wasnt even that horrible, they dont mention it often and it isnt that in detail if you ask me, everyone is just like "OHHH THE HORROR YOU GET TO SEE SPRINGTRAP BIRTH" but again if you still cant handle it i cant blame you you do whats best for ur health

honestly i know it does describe fleshtrap as a newborn infant and the whole its_a_boy.exe thing it makes it confusing to me, the best i can describe it in my opinion is like those horror alien movies where a guy gets infected with a parasite and another alien comes out of his ass or something, yknow

(again if you just want to form ur own opinion on that for whatever reason, you can skim the story cuz this isnt like, THE best place, just a summary for anyone curious enough to read like maybe 2k words about this, dont fully trust me this isnt even checked to see if it makes sense as sentences)

tldr: i myself dont imagine it was a pregnancy, but like an alien parasite thing, if it makes sense, i might have gotten confused about what the writers ment, i dont think the scene was THAT bad

in the flesh was a story about a guy who had all his relationships tumble down not only by his frustration with them, but his frustration with the way he programmed his game, leading him to be isolated and depressed after everyone had left him on his own

as for more silly opinions on this story that arent that important

hate matt glad they got the job done of killing him off for me, i hope every girl danced on his grave, i hope jason is living his life and i hope gene junior out there if living his life, why was belly used 6 times and stomach was used like 3 times

stan robert the cliffs and sylvia your the band instead and i need everyone to hear my idea of a hannah/madison/meghan/eve/emma polycule

ok im done wiring this its 23:17 rn and i couldnt be bothered to wait next morning to recheck everything if you see any spelling mistakes no u do not

#calico.exe #tried to get inspired by bonefalls essays cuz theyre so fascinating to read #but its not really an essay just a summary #or a discussion idc #fnaf #fazbear frights #five nights at freddys #ALSO I NEED TO SAY THIS AGAIN I DONT CARE IF YOU LIKE MATT GOOD FOR YOU I JUST DONT #this was kinda fun . i hope everything made sense i might do this for some other stories #im infodumping to myself so that everyone can see and i think thats funny #anyways sorry this is so thrown around and weridly written at times ive been writing this for 4 hours and im SO tired

[cogbreath]

i waint to hea r your bbt things

sheldon is also not the only one whos autistic imo. im not certain of who i all headcanon as such, but i feel its a fitting one for amy and bernadette actually. i think a lot of the problems with the way sheldon's autism is written is the fact that other characters don't *respect* him about it. like his needs and behaviors are often belittled or treated as nonsensical. overall i think everyone should be much kinder and understanding about it towards him seeing as they are literally his friends and all.

also probably a nitpicky thing and a matter of my own autistic sensory preferences but i feel it makes more sense for sheldon to NOT wear his sleeves rolled up for sensory reasons. whatever though im allowed to project. also i think they missed an opportunity to explore his interest in vexillology more? like there was maybe 1 or 2 episodes i remember about it but if youve ever met a vexillology enjoyer you know its a common topic they gush about.

speaking of gushing i think the dynamic between sheldon and amy would be like. two autistic best friends who love to infodump at eachother and do parallel activities. at most maybe they have some sort of queerplatonic thing going on? but im not actually super versed in what that means despite being aromantic myself xP

oh anothet thing that bothers me is how the female characters are written as not getting any of the geeky stuff??? it's stupid. like, yeah penny isnt a nerd, but she's an aspiring actress i think she would know what a star trek is. -_- honestly like, all of them would understand a lot of those things and are probably into similar stuff. bbt seems to think that like, these are Guy interests that all women dont understand or get when in reality like, dc comics n shit like that, literally your average person can follow along so i hate that they make the women seem as if they don't understand star wars references.

obviously this is probably one of the most common complaints about the show but id love to have made a lot of the pop culture references controlled and niche. we dont need a reference every other 5 minutes, id like to define each character's interests in a more sensicle way outside of just "haha guys look theres nerd stuff on tv hahah did you guys get that reference"?

also another problem is the way howard behaves. like some episodes his behavior is like, sexual harassment at times, which is met with a laugh track every time. not cool, and unnecessary, should be written to be more respectful. and then of course id like to make him have a better view of his mother, the dynamic in the show is one based off of antisemitic stereotypes about jewish mothers, and thats shitty. i wont retcon it to be a perfect mother/son relationship, like they would definitely still bicker, but i want to potray his mother as more than nagging and obsessive, like perhaps she does care too much and doesn't always treat him as an adult at times, but i dont find a lot of the overall nastiness that happens in the show between them to be funny or interesting.

raj is a pretty okay character imho, but definitely needs to be written more respectfully. He is a major example of the trope of characters of colour being sidelined. like the fact he was the ONLY character to be single in the end of the series? its kinda fucked up lol. obviously as mentioned before i think raj x howard should be the canon outcome. howeber both of them are bisexual, they both are potrayed as having interest in women; but i also think their interest in eachother is serious, or at least should be written as such. its also probably likely that the way he's written in terms of his culture should be improved but i havent gotten around to that just yet. i also think his anxiety issues should have been written with more respect, like the fact he was physically unable to talk to girls i think shouldnt have been an issue he had with *just* women. it seems they were trying to potray him as having selective mutism? but obviously thats not a thing that ONLY happens when one is a around ppl they r attracted to.

bernadette im actually rlly excited to write better because she reminds me of myself at times. i will dial her mischievous nature and her interest in microbiology up to 10. i will make her infodump about prions just i do.

also imho leonard is transmasc. i dont have any like, "evidence" or theory for why i think that other than just he feels that way to me. not that we even need justifications for transgender headcanons around these parts though.

also wil wheaton will NOT be existing anymore as a character in the narrative due to the fact he blocked me on tumblr for some dumbass shit. LOL.

uh i didnt expect to actually have all that much to say about this show... LOL.. enjoy my rambling!

[arqdyke]

whatre your opinions on all the jake ships. ALL OF THEM.

hi gaz :3 under the cut bc its literally fivemillion miles long.

rosejake - ??/10 theres something there. i can see it in my minds eye. its not romantic probably(??) but i feel like they would be so insane unhinged abt each other in a really hard to describe way. this is largely bc i like smashing my faves together and having them be weird abt each other.

davejake - 8/10 hehe. i like them :3 theyre very funny & silly. i feel like neither of them have ever introspected in their entire lives w/out repressing it immediately afterwards & together they get Worse. this eventually culminates in them both having Realizations and transitioning. i think they can holding hands on purpose.

jakeroxy - 8/10 theyre so unlabeled confusing but DEEPLY intimate relationship to me. they are baring their souls to each other in a hobby lobby parking lot ^-^ theyre very important to me

dirkjake - ??/10 clutches head oh theyre oddly compelling to me actually. i think they work best as weird ex's who have sort of something going on but they dont really work in a 'proper' relationship so its awkward & confusing for everyone around them. my feelings r mixed overall though.

jakehal - 10/10 imagine the worst pitch dynamic you possibly can. now make it worse. i have several vague aus in my mind palace about them being terrible & codependent. but in actuality i think their dynamic is very interesting from a character analysis standpoint & thats a very easy way to make me ship a set of characters. also i think its funny. and jake deserves a robotboyfriend.

jakedavesprite - 5/10 ive actually thought abt this one before surprisingly but there wasnt really a lot going on with them. definitely potential though!!!

jakejasprose - 9/10 futch dyke 4 bisexual aroace and its up to you whos which. i think theyre the weirdest palerom dynamic on the earth but genuinely they are so bffs to me. bffs that kiss a little (a lot) thats jasproses emotional support [vile slur omitted]! & jakes emotional support kittycatgirl :3

davepetajake(??) - 8/10 gripping the sides of my chair. yeah im normal about these characters who i dont think have any speaking line 1on1 interactions. so normal. why do u ask? anyways yeah i think theyre kind of supersilly awesome & fun. and also *gestures vaguely * the psychological trauma is vast and fascinating 2 my fucked up mind.

jakerisolsprite - 10/10 ok now hear me out. this was one of my first ever jakeships actually i just think the "jake/a guy who hates his guts" dynamic is supremely underrated & funny as fuck. they r like weird & messed up usually pitch vacillation nightmare girlfriends. genuinely very attached to them in a personal way.

jakearquius - ??/10 well. looks down at myself. looks back up. theyre funny? surprisingly i dont actually think abt them often.

arajake - 10/10 imagine a world so full of joy and peace. ok but fr their characters are like. intertwined in my mind. their relationship is like almost romantic...? theyre aro4aro. but very much in an 'official' relationship as well. if they knew or cared what it was they would be in a qpr but they dont. i think spending time w aradia would help jake figure out more abt himself & i think aradia would just really like spending time with him. they are marveling at each others minds.

jaketav - 3/10 unfortunately i go out of my way to not think too hard abt tavros so im gonna have to leave this one alone. in a hypothetical world they could be bffs forever!

jakesol - 10/10 deep breath. ok so actually im very very attached to the idea of pale jakesol. it shows up in my casual idle daydreams & in every au i think abt too hard. i think they can taking a nap together. i want them to sillyargue about random bullshit & infodump at each other about things the other could not give less of a shit about. clingy sleepynaptime girlfriends. neither of them has showered in weeks. also theyre so totally each others type. like look at canon for a moment and consider it.

jakekat - 7/10 idk. i think theyre sillies. they bond over cinema in the arguing way. i think jake would like to mess with him until it becomes clear that karkat doesnt actually hate everything and is just kind of Like That. i can see them being good friends and... maybe?? boygirlfriends.

jakenep - 8/10 i think she can hunting him for sport. like for actual sport they go play high stakes tag in forests for several months and come out soulbonded. also jake needs more sillycatgirls in his life & nepeta needs more chill/fun ppl to hang out with. shes being sillySTIFLED.

jakekan - 5/10 honestly i can not say ive ever though about- wait no no i thought about it once like forever ago. honestly they could be pretty good green autism besties!! idk abt romance but thats mostly bc ive just never considered it.

jakerezi - ??/10 this one is absurdly funny to me. i dont think it would ever happen but if it did it would be really really funny.

jakevris - 7/10 actually ive read several fics abt this before! it kind of appeals to me in a weird way but i prefer them as weird frenemies.

jakequius - 8/10 lays down. look. ok. so. well. i just think theres potential ok? i cant explain it. im running out of steam for this if you cant tell.

gamjake - 0/10 no thanks ?

erijake - 5/10 i dont think ive seriously thought about it but theres definitely some potential there.

thats all im doing. god bless u all.

#dt-posts #gaz tag

[latulasbian-1]

what are your thoughts on kankri? personally i never understood the appeal and im interested to hear your take since he Was on the b tier of your list

OK! Sorry for lateness but I only noticed your question at like 2:00 AM and needed a full tank of brain-gas to be able to convey my thoughts even semi-coherently. 

So Kankri’s a weird one, probably one of the most convoluted and self-contradictory characters in Homestuck. Its fitting given he’s pretty much a one note joke and hussie’s one-note joke characters actually wind up being either his most oddly complex (see: equius and feferi for instance) or most sympathetic (see: Nepeta). Kankri’s a bit of both imo, though I wouldn’t call him a favorite for me. 

Kankri’s characterization is built almost entirely on one fuckin’ note: “LOL AIN’T TUMBLR SJWs FUNNY AND ANNOYING!?!?!?”. If you disagree with this then I don’t even know what to tell you, bc everything from his style of long-winded monologues (that wind up running up on Hussie Ableism Moments bc in-narrative his infodumping is supposed to be annoying???) to his inability to take social cues to his supposed-to-be-interpreted-as-excessive use of trigger warnings to his unapologetic killjoy attitude to his supposed hypocrisy/”privilege” are literally all just a fucking layer cake of anti-SJW stereotypes. This is where the issue of how the fandom interprets Kankri kicks in, as people’s opinions on him (aside from a few diehards) tend to scale from “DAWWW CUTE WIDDLE UPPITY BEANBOY” to “fucking annoying neoliberal”. For the matter, neither of these are intended by Hussie, while he did design him to be cute he wasn’t meant to be hateable for leftist homestuck fans as a (neo-)liberal or faux leftist. Hussie just designed him after everyone hussie found annoying in the social justice community primarily on tumblr. Even his political monologues, though not WITHOUT hypocrisy and bullshit, tend to actually skew towards “pretty fucking reasonable hussie just thinks people being upset by bad stuff is stupid”.  

Now, people cite Kankri being ableist in his criticism of certain other dancestors for ~conforming to stereotypes~, which yes from an in context scenario is pretty fucking bad. If someone IRL is dealing with their disability in a way you think seems pretty stereotypical keep that thought to yourself. HOWEVER, AS ONE OF THE MOST CRUCIAL POINTS TOWARDS KANKRI BEING GENERALLY SYMPATHETIC, WE GET THE META ELEMENT. Hussie, in writing a hypocritical mansplainer who goes on and on and on about everything thats politically incorrect about the people around him, practically beat-for-beat replicates talking points PEOPLE HAVE USED TO CRITICIZE HOMESTUCK ITSELF. YES! MITUNA’S PRESENTATION AS A CHARACTER IS 100% UNAMBIGUOUSLY AWFUL IN ITS PORTRAYAL OF PEOPLE WITH BRAIN INJURIES AND MENTAL DISORDERS. DAMARA IS A RACIST STEREOTYPE SO BAD HUSSIE SHOULD GET THROWN IN JAIL. INCEST IS BAD. If ANYONE in homestuck should’ve pulled the meta knowledge shit in post-canon, kankri would’ve been a WAYYYYYY better candidate than dirk for it, especially since kankri seems halfway to realizing he’s fictional just by political analysis of the story he’s in! Kankri seems to exist at the apex of Hussie’s confusion about fandom, given he’s baffled enough by people being obsessed with his work yet so intensely negative that he can only seem to think of them as obsessive manchild wierdos with no sense of rational thought. As someone who myself unironically loves Homestuck and yet have an entire third of my brain dedicated to ripping it apart on an ethical level, I can see some of myself in that turtleneck’d contrarian. Just because someone is a fan of something doesn’t mean they will or should unthinkingly defend it from all recourse. This is something homestuck as a whole struggles with, I think back to the aspect or extended zodiac quiz where one of the questions amounted to “someone is talking shit about a show you like, how do you respond” and there wasn’t even an answer for “actually listen to what they’re trying to say and consider if they could be right”. Kankri is a symbol of sorts for those critical enjoy-ers, in a way. A stupid silly not-that-meaningful way, but a way. I think people should reclaim him. 

I’ve touched on it a bit before, but the last main sympathizing aspect of kankri for me (aside from personality things like his frankly unearned patience with a friend group that entirely fucking hates his guts) is a trait share by almost all the dancestors: Hussie’s fucking disturbing use of mental illness & psychiatric disorders with them. Between Kankri’s unwillingness to observe common social cues, his overtly poised and practiced manner of speaking, his obsession with using trigger warnings to warn off confrontation in leu of not just speaking his mind with everything, his tendency to cling to certain articles of clothing for long periods of time, his implied difficulty taking care of himself physically, and the fucking insulting “mom-friend useless-manchild-who-needs-nannying” dynamic he has with Porrim, he comes off (intentionally or no) as a beat-for-beat embodiment of an autistic person as seen through Hussie’s tropey and horribly ableist worldview. This is a common trait he shares with both Aranea and Mituna, as well as many of the other dancestors to lesser degrees (many of them, like Mituna, also have OTHER mental disorders flat-out-stated in such a way that makes their depiction just fucking confused and bad). For me, and for at least SOME other people, it makes unbiased critical reactions to them damn near impossible. They deserve better than how hussie can write them. In a lot of ways I have friends like Kankri, and Hussie’d almost fucking certainly find them just as embarrassing and annoying as he meant for Kankri to be. 

So yeah, Kankri isn’t my favorite by any means but i don’t feel like i can or should condemn him. He’s fun. I’d watch his video essays. 

And this isn’t even BEGINNING to touch on how much I loathe Porrim as an example of “good cool fun feminists that hussie can sexualize!” And her more open bisexuality than other trolls being both a tool for fetishization by Hussie and a fucking skin-crawling thing to use as a contrast for Kanaya’s status as either “the only confirmed lesbian in homestuck (until postcanon showed rose was a lesbian too)” or “the only lesbian troll in existence ever bc thats totally how sexuality would work with aliens” (sorry if you ascribe to the “all trolls are bisexual bc they’re supposedly binormative as a get-out-of-jail-free card for hussie’s hetero-ass ship tease shit” then. well get better soon) 

(seriously though everyone who pulls the “kanaya is the only lesbian alternian” shit owes every lesbian 100 dollars) 

#homestuck #kankri #longpost #discourse #Anonymous

[doctorguilty]

ok you’ve all been waiting for it my thoughts on the sonic movie!!!

under cut cause long

so overall! I really liked the movie! I think it sorta landed pretty in the ballpark of what I sorta expected quality-of-plot wise and how much I’d be entertained by it. which is satisfying!!! I’m going to like, stream of thought this, starting with some criticisms which are gonna be kinda hefty cause im critiquing something I care about 

so right away I really disliked the “record scratch so this is me I bet you’re wondering how I got in this situation” opening like I’m not sure if it was intentionally a self aware joke on that being cliche and dumb but it does like, really frustrate me cause my philosophy for most stories is Start your story where it begins!! which made the backstory infodump more frustrating on top of that, like, I think that’s an easy mistake to make to want to spill your Backstory right away but it’s not necessary! the audience doesn’t NEED to know immediately what sonic was like in his homeworld and his tragic separation from it. we already have the audiences suspension of disbelief in play because they know they’re watching.. a movie about sonic the hedgehog in the real world. I think the backstory stuff would have been much more impactful as a flashback later on, especially when sonic’s whole arc is how lonely and isolated he is. it would be a better punch in the heart to later on be like so by the way as a child his guardian probably died and sent him to earth for his own safety. so that was like AUGH you blew it 

next up that i think was unnecessary like, completely, was establishing that sonic already knew the main cop guy and his wife (omg I already forgot their names..because they were not memorable but we’ll get to that fjdsg) and like, secretly immersed himself into their life that’s ?? odd to me? I think it would have been fine to just have sonic be like attached to the whole small town and he thinks the cop is cool and calls him donut lord, and that’s the extent of it like cause the problem is later down the plot when sonic finds out cop guy is leaving green hills and flips out about it.. I’m like, not sure if I believe sonic, immersing himself in their life, had NOT known that was a thing cop guy wanted to do like he NEVER heard about that??? but that’s like whatever 

I don’t really like the cop guy as the protag human like. oof he was very bland and I’m trying to figure out how to put this into words............ I feel like a character like him isn’t someone the audience can really connect to. this guy has a virtually perfect life with a house and a dog and a job and a wife, his Conflict is that he wants to move to california and see more action and save people, but the WEIRDEST thing about it is that the prospect of leaving his little town behind isn’t really shaking him up at all. it shakes SONIC up later, but up until that point.... the cop just has legit a perfect life and it’s kinda sad because sonic appearing in it physically becomes something that immediately has the effect of “starting to ruin it” and thats why the cop is so like, mean about things at first. 

see I don’t really like that it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. if I were to rewrite this keeping the general ideas in mind, I would have opted for a ... paul blart crossed with judy hopps. a guy who’s life isn’t all in order, maybe not living in trash but he doesn’t have a wife, he DREAMS of being a cop and saving people, but he doesn’t quite have what it takes physically/mentally or maybe he’s too afraid to even try. he loves his rural town but thinks like, maybe if I move to the big city I’ll find myself maybe he’s offered a job there for something boring and is like resigning to a boring life idk there’s a lot you can do but you get the idea! a lonely underdog with big dreams. so when Sonic comes into his life, its WAY more impactful to paul hopps.....judy blart...... that Sonic pleads for help saving his life and this sudden adventure isn’t ruining his life either. 

then LATER when we get to sonic being upset that paul hopps wants to leave, it’s less this awkward confrontation “how dare you wanna live your already in motion dreams somewhere ELSE  because people love you HERE” (like .. oof bad take tbh) it would be a much nicer “why do you want to leave your home to become a hero when everyone here already sees you as one” and instead of the shabby like “well I guess I’ll stay because i crossed off saving someone from my bucket list” paul hopps would feel fulfilled he saved sonic and I actually you know what? I’d change up the whole scene with the turtle to be at the end where paul hopps becomes a cop in green hills and he like, saves a turtle crossing the road and is like! that’s what its all about being a hero! like thats cute and resonates with an audience, the message like, being a hero just means being kind and doing the right thing, which is way more suitable for a sonic movie when the sonic series has always been a campy power of friendship thing. 

in a similar vein, the cop being a lonely underdog would give him a better connection with sonic, so that even if he was annoyed by him at first he’d later have the understanding they’re one in the same, you know? connections people!! themes!!!! 

anyway but enough of that au 

so the last thing I’m like iffy about is how robotnik was handled. like jim carry is funny and stuff but it felt like a bit of a mess like, this character is repeatedly reminding us what a hard ass I’M SUPERIOR THAN YOU MY IQ IS HUGE but then being super mega goofy, like I’m all for eccentric scientists but it felt kind of disconnected? and idk like not to be that guy but man.. i remember when sonic 06 came out and everyone hated how eggman was slimmed down to what he looked like in that game jfkdfsgksdj like my brain really doesn’t find a fully slender bodied eggman palatable like......... let my mans be fat ... WHICH tbh I’m a little nervous because at the end of the movie we see this implication that robotnik is turning more visually into the eggman we know with the stache and bald head but I’m worried they’re gonna also go with “and he also gets fat” cause I don’t like that sort of thing, you know? 

i think that’s all for my major criticisms!! but otherwise like! the movie was genuinely really fun and goofy and it felt very in spirit with the sonic franchise! 

if you read bogleech’s post I agree with him whole heartedly that this is the best characterization of sonic. it feels almost like?????? the characterization he was MEANT To have but he always ended  up going TOO MUCH in the direction of confident and cocky and being too cool and successful about it? I love sonic with that hyper teenager-like personality, it’s incredibly charming and cute, like I never Hated sonic as a character but he was defs like... lower on my list of characters in the franchise I found interesting. I felt like I could connect with movie sonic a lot and like! i’d want to be his friend, you know? I really really want to see more of him like that! 

I also agree big time that the movie had the best use of bullet time I’ve ever seen! I’m like omg?? WHY hasnt that ever been a mechanic in a game? 

and overall just like the cuteness like............I literally almost cried when the little girl gave sonic her shoes like AAAAAAAAAAAAA WEEPS............ and the end with sonic getting his own room thats so super cute too!!!! 

oh and the post credits scene with tails was SO FUCKING HYPE like, people in the theater audibly gasped and started being like  YESSSSSSS tails looks really great! 

so like YEAH dabs ,, being a story snob aside it was a fun and cute movie and I’m glad to hear it trumped detective pikachu for a video game movie  I’m glad it’s brought some attention to the sonic franchise! like while it’s cool in some aspects that Nerd Culture is mainstream now, it’s absolutely exhausting the HUGE focus on that is marvel and DC and all that stuff........ like theres nothing wrong w/ liking that but its like.. hm.... idk how to explain it but................. as someone who was bullied a lot in school for liking things like sonic.. like I guess stuff like that people usually see as lame stuff for babies??? superheroes are more like, macho and palatable to adults?? it’s been a good experience for all my normie coworkers to ask what I did for valentines day and I tell them “I saw the sonic the hedgehog movie” and I BRACE myself reflexively to be laughed at but not a single person did they were just like oh cool! how was it? like it really makes me appreciate I got to at least grow up and feel a little more accepted! 

so THATS my thoughts feel free to comment and discuss! 

#seth speaks

[autisticteru]

this is completely unprompted but i just feel like sharing my first impressions of mp100 cuz why not i made this blog to infodump i can do what i want. 

and honestly i read the whole thing about a year ago with very very little spoilers directly after watching the teaser for the anime so a lot of my reactions to the series were very raw and uninfluenced by anybody else’s opinion. i didnt even liveblog it i just read it. and im very glad that was how i read it and im just. reminiscing on that because im grateful that i did that back then.

mob

i first ever saw mob in some fanart that was tagged mob psycho 100 like. a good few years ago tbh. i figured it was some anime or manga i didnt get the time to read but mob first looked to me like he was a delinquent or something. the title and the way i thought abt the word “mob” in my head def had something to do with that, but also he was a straight faced boy who just seemed really seirous. i remember reading in an interview abt one punch man a bit over a year ago that ONE described saitama as stoic and mob as emotional. that. surprised the hell out of me and got me interested but i only read literally EXACTLY right after i saw the first teaser trailer for the anime

when i read the manga i fell in love with the boy right away. it didnt take me long at fucking all. he was great and wonderful and i loved him and i related to him big time and i wanted to see him grow more and more.

and my feelings are pretty much the same now except more complex. but im remembering the first time i got to the end of the world domination arc. i think that line “that’s why I will help you” really impacted me a lot for some reason. mob was, very special to me. he felt very much like me. i could relate to him a lot

reigen

i first saw reigen in some fanart but i thought he was some teenager at first because it was just some kinda cartoony fanart that wasnt very detailed. i guessed that he and mob were a duo or something like saitama and genos were from one punch but i did not guess that it was going to be a master-discible relationship

i hated reigen at first gonna be completely fuckin honest here i was a bit annoyed with him like yeah he was funny but he was also kind of rude??? and i didnt like that he was tricking mob because i loved mob 

by the end of the read he really did grow on me. but ive always been a bit hard on the poor guy, but thats just because hes an adult i suppose. even during the separation arc i have to admit.....i wasnt all that sympathetic toward him until the VERY VERY end. IF IM BEING ENTIRELY HONEST I WAS KIND OF GLAD BECAUSE I WAS GLAD THAT MOB REALIZED HE DIDNT NEED HIM AND THAT REIGEN REALIZED HE DID. also i felt he did deserve at least some of what he got from that arc, all things considered. dont get me wrong, i love him now but it did really take a while for me, probably longer than anyone else i know. now im love this greasman with my whole heart (but i still wish he would pay mob more. preoblematic fav for that reason only)

dimple

i knew that dimple was sort of the mascot character but i hoped he wouldnt be one of those annoying ones but i didnt think he would be since i had some faith in ONE’s writing abilities. he seemed like a ghost and i knew that mp100 had ghosts so yeah i thought it was cool to have a ghost character why not

lots of ppl were irritated by dimple at first but. ehhh i could never hate him. i only mildly disliked him before i realized he was That Guy. anyway i had been mostly neutral on dimple but by the mogami arc i actually really started loving dimple a lot because he saved mob a bunch of times and i support mob having friends i dont  care who they are i want this good boy to have friends

by the end i absolutely did love him i loved him and reigens interractions at that point but i didnt know if it was like. socially acceptable to ship him with reigen. i wouldnt have done it with sg dimple because i had no idea that was even a thing. i forgot abt that dumbass security guard he wasnt even a person in my mind honestly the first sg dimple fanart i came across i was so confused  i was like. who is this. who is this man dimples possessing. took me forever to realize it was that security guard who he possessed for probably less than an hour and that confused the hell out of me but then i realized. oh. u guys just want to make him hot. okay

ritsu

ritsu was probably the character i knew the most about, but i knew very little. i only saw him in opm/mp100 fanarts where they compared mob and ritsu to tatsumaki and fubuki, and i guessed that ritsu was the fubuki with the inferiority complex. and i was right but it wasnt it quite the same way. but overall he seemed interesting in that regard since i loved fubuki at the time so he was a character i was looking forward to.

ritsu was...it was love at first sight??? yeah. i loved ritsu so much right from the start i loved how he was introduced i loved his character arc i loved the whole way it was presented if the teru arc just before that hadn’t already hooked me then his arc sure as fuck did. 

the last line i ever saw ritsu utter when i finally caught up with the manga was the famous “hnn...the loans” line. perhaps one of the best lines of all time??? i loved ritsu and since i knew fuck abt shit wrt what was going to happen in the scar arc i was literally about to cry when it was revealed he might be dead god. i was SO STRESSED IN THAT WHOLE FUCKING ARC I DONT THINK I HAD EVER BEEN MORE STRESSED IN MY LIFE.

teru (oh boy)

i first saw teru in the first teaser. i think that was actually the thing that made me want to read it, mostly because the animation and movement in that scene just was so. good. and flowing. he seemed like a villain to me, or some sort of rival. but a harmless one. one that couldn’t fucking touch mob. it sort of reminded me of the thing w/ saitama vs sonic in opm. he seemed like an asshole, but for some reason in my heart when i saw him doing that shit there, i felt like i would like him. i had no basis for this. but i cant believe i was right

when i first saw teru in the manga i was gettin all excited because “hey this looks like the esper kid in the teaser!” and i was excited to see a new character like that introduced. i at least wanted to meet another esper. and teru seemed like the type of villain who would get his ass handed to him in the worst of ways and realize that mob was much much stronger than him and maybe hed even gain some respect for it and i fucking called it i cant believe it i called it in the first page i saw him i fuckign CALLED IT. and i was screaming throughout his whole arc. every second i found myself absolutely falling in love with him and. actually. unfortunately understanding exactly where he was coming from. and once mob went on the whole “you’re just like me” speech, that was probably the defining moment. 

but it didnt stop with that arc at ALL. every gotdam second he was on screen after that i was honestly thinking in my head “stop doing that ur gonna be my fav if u keep doing that!” but he kept doing that and wound up being my fav and i loved how much he believed and supported mob and i loved how different and yet how similar he was from the first time we see him and. i couldnt help myself hes my Type. i was destined to fall for him from the start

shou

I HAD NO PREVIOUS INTRODUCTION TO SHOU BEFORE I READ THE SERIES. HE WAS NOT ANYONE TO ME. HE WAS NOTHING. which was why so much of the claw stuff surprised me tbh. but yeah i had no idea who this kid was i had not been introduced to him

when i first saw shou i disliked him for beating up ritsu and capturing him and mob and i also disliked him for calling mob a coward and THEN i disliked him for burning down mobs house and possibly killing ritsu and his family in fact by that point i was seeing red i wanted that fuckr DEAD. but then it was revealed that everyone was safe but i was still a bit peeved that he did what he did to mob just to leave a “fuse” but i was also projecting a bit because shou almost gave me a fucking HEART ATTAKC and i was NOT GOING TO EASILY FORGIVE. i did forgive tho. eventually. after my poor heart calmed down and i saw him get beat up by his dad and his hubris 

at the end i shipped ritshou because obviously i shipped ritshou i mean how can u not i mean theyre just really good i shipped it 

so like yeah

#shark speaks #i just went on an infodump rant cuz i felt like it hey #long post -