#if you are not having fun

[abirddogmoment]

some thoughts about the pressures of trialing in dog sports and the emotional environment of trials, partially inspired by this post by the beautiful @mongrelization

this post happened to come at a time when I was at a decision point in my trial career with mav. he had just started refusing jumps (i thought it was a training issue at the time, i now know he was in pain) and he wasn't having fun. we were disconnected in the ring, with him choosing to go visit friends or just blow past obstacles without attempting them. it was frustrating and it was such a stark contrast from our training runs (not flawless but immeasurably better than our performances in the ring) and i was making jokes (as everyone does!) about mav being the worst, etc, etc.

except they weren't jokes.

they sounded like jokes and they even felt like jokes in the moment, but looking back i can confidently see that i was frustrated and resentful and the "lighthearted jokes" from other competitors and from myself were just fueling the fire. i saw darcies post shortly after a particularly frustrating trial where we just couldn't connect, i was trying to decide whether to push through and fix our issues or give up completely on agility.

her post wasn't an epiphany, i probably would've gotten there eventually, but her post that said, essentially hey its fucked up to make those jokes about your dog and its fucked up for people to make those jokes about your dog and thats not how a trial should be - something clicked. its NOT how it should be.

i took a break from trialing in everything and cut training way back and just took all the pressure off of mav while i got my internal emotional environment back on track. im a really competitive person and its hard to consciously dial that back, but more than that, it's legitimately embarrassing when things go wrong with people watching you. if your default is humor about it (like mine), its a hard shift to not make jokes about your dog when things go wrong. but its an important and necessary shift.

i started trialing him again after about 3 months off, very lightly. i stopped entering full weekends and opted to do half-days or only saturdays and he fucking THRIVED. i made time to meet all his needs before trials, i prioritized his happiness over technically correct courses, and i got over the embarrassment of excusing myself from a run if it was going downhill. i fixed my internal emotional environment and that fixed our disconnect and made every win more meaningful.

the thing is, i am 100% sure i would not have fixed my emotional environment if i was actively competing and practicing the same patterns. i absolutely had to take that step back to fix myself. you can't make meaningful change if youre still in the middle of it acting it out.

i lost out on trials with mav and that sucked so much in the moment. i had awful FOMO watching my friends compete and finish titles while we did little low-pressure walks at home. but ultimately i gained something so much more important, and looking back i can't bring myself to regret that at all.

#anyway here are some thoughts #its vulnerable dont look at me #i guess the tldr is: if youre stuck in the same pattern and things arent working #take a meaningful and legitimate break #(not a 'oh ill stop trialing and drill these skills' NO) #(an actual break where you take the pressure off you and your dog) #mav hurt himself from a freak accident that could happen to literally any dog that runs #if i had kept the pressure on i wouldve ruined the relationship we had built through training #take the break and take it for the right reasons (your and your dogs' emotional wellbeing) #you cant make meaningful change if you're actively practing your same patterns #i am so so so so so done with dogs lookjng miserable in the ring #if you are not having fun #of your dog is not having fun #if the vibe is 'frantic stressful manic' then i dont want to see it #(if you come at me about DrIvE i will block is2g this is not the post) #i want to see CONFIDENCE i want to see CONNECTION i want to see DELIGHT i want to see actual goodnatured HUMOR #i want to compliment you on the fsct that your dog looked happy #if (dog forbid) you lose your dog tomorrow #will looking back on your trial history bring you comfort? or will it make you sad because #you were always hoping that 'the next one will be better'? #and its okay if the answer is no #but if the answer is no - fix your shit #disclaimer this is not at anyone #this is a reflection of my personal Trauma #if you feel you must roast me about this consider: do not

[vamprisms]

i feel like a lot of the 'i hate kids' crowd would be more tolerant if they understood that due to a kid's limited experience of the world that 4 hour flight might just be the longest they've ever had to sit still for or that trapped finger might literally be the most pain they've ever felt in their short life or they might not have ever seen a person with pink hair ever so of course they want to touch it or nobody's told them yet that they can't run around the museum and they only just learned cheetahs are the fastest animals so of course they want to put that to the test. how were they supposed to know etc etc.

#like majority of the time kids are not just 'being naughty'. they have big feelings inside little bodies it's a lot #also like. #it should be illegal to dye your hair fun colours if you aren't prepared for kids in public to ask if youre related to a my little pony #EDIT: the notes on this post are an absolute cesspool. i don't care about your reasons for hating kids you sound like a disney villain

[hunny-k]

This is the funniest way you could've put it

#he's such a LOSER at BEING RETIRED #amazing #keep going bud i believe in you #have fun with your movies yes sir

[mushroom-punk]

YOU ARE NOW ENTERING THE 'WHAT' ZONE

happy episode 11!

#WELCOME TO THE WHAT ZONE EVERYBODY!! #anime-only fans i hope you guys are having fun #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #PER MY LAST POST

[yuri-alexseygaybitch]

They need to invent more fake celebrities like Hatsune Miku and Gorillaz and the Muppets because it's genuinely the most sustainable way to maintain a parasocial relationship with the entertainer class.

#who needs real celebrities and their awful takes when you can have fun cartoon people

[emilnikos]

I need non autistic people to realise meltdowns are a real debilitating thing that has a serious effect on your mental and physical health NOWWWWW!!! The way its been trivialized and lessened pisses me the fuck off. It's not a tantrum and it doesn't come from "being too weak-willed" it's painful and it's embarrassing AND MOST OF ALL IT'S INVOLUNTARY!! Don't claim to be an ally to autistic or disabled people and then make fun of people who have meltdowns. Literally get the hell out of my sight

#i can't believe i have to day it but autism /is/ a disablity. its disabling. meltdowns are part of that. #'oh this is a lukewarm take' you dumbshit fucks have been throwing the word neurodivergent and meltdown around so #casually they have both been said at me with the same disdain as a swear word. you guys will accept making fun of autistic people #if someone jn your circle who is 'cool' does it first. at your big ages. shut the hell up

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Must be a Sugondese joke.

#dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims #laios touden #senshi #Looks like I won't be able to post this on dungeon meshi thursday so instead I will have a fun past/future conversation #This is wednesday me who has not seen the episode yet but I have such a strong feeling that it is going to be extremely special. #*This* fight is what the first arc has been building up to and it has *so* many incredible moments. #We're going to see the chilchuck knife throw! The leg sacrifice! The bones! #Watch them ramp up the quality this episode and go wild with the frantic action of 'oh god our plan is going to shit'. #Hello. Me of the future who just watched the episode. #I knew it was going to be good but that...that blew my mind completely. My high expectations were beyond met. My god. #I'm just speechless at how well they handled everything. The leg. The tension. That ENDING. #If you have not already: PLEASE watch Dungeon Meshi.

[toss-a-coin-to-your-stan-account]

hey since it's coming up again: no it's not a good thing that the government wants to ban tiktok. no you should not be glad that the government might ban tiktok. no you should not respond to this with "good riddance" or "hurry up I hate that app". I should not have to explain this to you but the government banning a social media app is still a bad thing even if you don't like the UI or booktok or having to say "unalive" or how you think it's killing the very notion of attention spans. It's still bad. It's bad.

#the amount of times ive seen people be happy they're trying to ban it as if its not blatant censorship is like... #hey did you know that we have these things called brain cells? might be fun for you to try using them #mine #tiktok #tiktok ban #us politics

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

#My art #One Piece #Nico Robin #Sir Crocodile #Y'all the OP brainrot is BAD #According to an SBS Crocodile would absolutely spoil his child rotten if he had one. *We all know how Robin's childhood went* #Scary mofo who does not know how to parent a child but boy does he have the spirit + Child who has never had proper parent in her life #They'd make. An absolute disaster of a duo. This AU concept is so fucking funny to me okay #But also sad because I would fucking die for baby Robin she deserves the fucking world #This poor girl has never been spoiled in her entire life AND NOW PAPADILE IS HERE TO SPOIL HER #You know it's funny. I know 11 yo Robin should LOOK older than 8 year old Robin. But Crocodile is a fucking giant so she's still baby sized #Also I just had too much fun drawing Robin looking as pathetic as humanly possible lmao #She's a like a wet kitten in the rain 😭

[badolmen]

WARNING 18+

19

#ra speaks #it’s a silly joke/pun dw #we stay silly :3 #edit: #woahg. that’s a lot of notes. hi everybody o/ #10k. stop clenching your jaw and drink some water. #15k. eat some fresh fruit this week! I’m having kiwis tonight :] #20k. quit sitting like a shrimp it’s bad for your neck! sit up straight and do a little stretch every now and then #25k. I’m up at 2 AM but I’ll get to see the sunrise today :] if you can’t see that I hope you admire the sunset later today #30k. do something fun you haven’t done in a while. I haven’t drawn in months - I think I’ll paint a cat tomorrow :3

[nubs-mbee]

The people against bows becoming a trendy fashion accessory has annoyed me sooo much lately. Saw a tiktok that was like “if you get uncomfortable with us saying wearing bows infantilizes women and supports the patriarchy, it just means you’re uncomfortable with us pointing out you’ve been engaging in a harmful trend/behavior 😌” aaaaaAAAAAAH people online are allergic to nuance

#and their response to ‘just let people have fun’ #was just ‘you don’t want to think critically about this to avoiding facing the truth’ #it’s so weird how tiktok KNOWS which opinions will get on my nerves

[hiding-under-the-willow]

Quite possibly the funniest shit I have ever seen in my life

#atlas.art #artists on tumblr #mcyt #hermitcraft #hermitcraft 10 #xisumavoid #xisuma #mumbo jumbo #hermitcraft mumbo #grian #implied at least lol #i forgot how much I love my xisuma design he was so fun to draw here #not pictured here: xisuma's absolutely unhinged scream immediately after this and grian screeching 'YOU SAID HAVE FAITH' over and over agai

[agentromanoffsir]

neocities guide - why you should build your own html website

do you miss the charm of the 90s/00s web where sites had actual personality instead of the same minimalistic theme? are you feeling drained by social media and the constant corporate monopoly of your data and time? do you want to be excited about the internet again? try neocities!!

what is neocities?

neocities is a free hosting website that lets you build your own html website from scratch, with total creative control. in their own words: "we are tired of living in an online world where people are isolated from each other on boring, generic social networks that don't let us truly express ourselves. it's time we took back our personalities from these sterilized, lifeless, monetized, data mined, monitored addiction machines and let our creativity flourish again."

why should I make my own website?

web3 has been overtaken by capitalism & conformity. websites that once were meant to be fun online social spaces now exist solely to steal your data and sell you things. it sucks!! building a personal site is a great way to express yourself and take control of your online experience.

what would I even put on a website?

the best part about making your own site is that you can do literally whatever the hell you want! focus on a specific subject or make it a wild collection of all your interests. share your art! make a shrine for one of your interests! post a picture of every bird you see when you step outside! make a collection of your favorite blinkies! the world is your oyster !! here are some cool example sites to inspire you: recently updated neocities sites | it can be fun to just look through these and browse people's content! space bar | local interstellar dive bar creature feature | halloween & monsters big gulp supreme peanutbuttaz | personal site dragodiluna linwood | personal site patho grove | personal site

getting started: neocities/html guide

sound interesting? here are some guides to help you get started, especially if you aren't familiar with html/css sadgrl.online webmastery | a fantastic resource for getting started with html & web revival. also has a layout builder that you can use to start with in case starting from scratch is too intimidating web design in 4 minutes | good for learning coding basics w3schools | html tutorials templaterr | demo & html for basic web elements eggramen test pages | css page templates to get started with sadgrl background tiles | bg tiles rivendell background tiles | more free bg tiles

fun stuff to add to your site

want your site to be cool? here's some fun stuff that i've found blinkies-cafe | fantastic blinkie maker! (run by @transbro & @graphics-cafe) gificities | internet archive of 90s/00s web gifs internet bumper stickers | web bumper stickers momg | gif gallery 99 gif shop | 3d gifs 123 guestbook | add a guestbook for people to leave messages cbox | add a live chat box moon phases | track the phases of the moon gifypet | a little clickable page pet adopt a shroom | mushroom page pet tamaNOTchi | virtual pet crossword puzzle | daily crossword imood | track your mood neko | cute cat that chases your mouse pollcode | custom poll maker website hit counter | track how many visitors you have

web revival manifestos & communities

also, there's actually a pretty cool community of people out there who want to bring joy back to the web! melonland project | web project/community celebrating individual & joyful online experiences. Also has an online forum melonland intro to web revival | what is web revival? melonking manifesto | status cafe | share your current status nightfall city | online community onio.cafe | leave a message and enjoy the ambiance sadgrl internet manifesto | yesterweb internet manifesto | sadly defunct, still a great resource reclaiming online social spaces | great manifesto on cultivating your online experience

in conclusion

i want everyone to make a neocities site because it's fun af and i love seeing everyone's weird personal sites that they made outside of the control of capitalism :) say hi to me on neocities

#neocities #old web #webcore #old internet #web revival #indie web #html #website #recource #guide #can you tell that i've gotten REALLY into neocities this month!!!!! #but its so FUN i love seeing everyones weird af websites #its amazing #i love celebrating the old web #ANYWAYS MAKE A NEOCITIES HERES A GUIDE #i haven't touched html in like a decade #and i've been having a great time relearning #:) #share your sites with me!!!!!! #oh and share resources if you have them!

[bananonbinary]

also worth noting that "abusive" doesn't actually mean "irredeemable" either.

there's a lot of people that have done things in the past that were bad, because they weren't taught any better, or they were in an overall toxic situation where EVERYONE was shitty (like a cult), or they were just at an especially low point and hurt others for it.

you don't have to forgive them. you don't have to ever speak to them again. you can be angry with them until you die if you want.

but society cannot function if we don't allow them to move on. to change their behavior and fuck off somewhere else and build meaningful relationships without bothering you again. we need a path for people to change, or nothing ever will.

#like re: the last post #npd SHOULDNT mean 'youre an abusive person' #but also people who have abused people in the past can still become better people in the present #you know? #and as i metioned vaguely in that post. the way we currently treat people with NPD probably CAUSES THEM to lash out at and abuse others #if u abuse someone they lash back out at you and suddenly theres fun mutual abuse happening #so they need a way out of that cycle

[o0kawaii0o]

ROMANCE DAWN TRIO

#I have been drawing more pre time skip stuff then actual recent stuff of OP #pre time skip really just had this dumb (but fun) energy #ah don't get me wrong tho OP is still very much a joy #in case you were actually wondering - yes sanji gave zoro that keychain as a joke but uwu #working on 1 more silly drawing atm! #one piece #op #roronoa zoro #op nami #luffy #monkey d luffy #o0kawaii0o

[fox-mulder-gets-pegged]

I just wanna say bc I KNOW you're somewhere on tumblr, to the teenage girl who attended Take Your Kid To Work Day at an office building in Ontario, Canada circa 2013 and had a conversation with a middle aged woman in which you showed her your Black Veil Brides fanart and fanfics and ship content and told her about different fanfic tropes including a/b/o verse bc she happened to know who Panic! at The Disco and Fallout Boy were and thus you felt the need to show her your bandblr ship art, that was my fucking mother and I had to clarify all that to her including looking my mother in the eye and trying to explain a/b/o verse without sounding like a lunatic.

It's been 10 years and I still regularly sent evil energies in your direction. Since you'd be probably two years younger than me and thus legally an adult now, please know if this post reaches you it's on sight.

#she cornered me in the car and asked what shipping was and i almost had a fucking heart attack #imagine being like 16 years old and habing to explain knotting to your mother #random emo music girl I'm glad you had fun talking about your Band Guys to my mother #bc i also attended take your kid to work day at that office and i know how boring it was #but christ alive why did you have to fuck me like that? #anyways i hope this post reaches you so at the very least you know i think about you at least once a week #this has been weighing on me for ten years #im almost tempted to blaze this post