#i wish one day he could be sincere and have ppl appreciate him for who he is not some mask.

[kewltie]

anyway, abo au where alpha prohero ground zero decides it's time to start a family of his own but he doesn't have a mate and neither does he want one so he signs up for an omega surrogate program & meet his former childhood friend who will now carry his baby for him. 

izuku is a male omega w/ v v v high fertility even for his secondary sex and a strong body which make him an ideal surrogate to give birth healthy babies. w/ the program izuku contracted, izuku had given birth to several babies for various ppl over the years & babies are all happy and that's all that matter.

being a surrogate wasn't ever part of his dream but izuku is an omega & quirkless in a world that doesn't exactly appreciate either. one day when he was fruitlessly working at his 9 to 5 job, a rep from the company approached him w/ a pamphlet about surrogacy. the paid is v v good, the prenatal care & pregnancy compensation is all taken care of by the clients and his company, and he can select and choose which jobs to take. many families and ppl in the world cant have kids of their own for various reasons and izuku is HELPING THEM ACHIEVE THEIR DREAM. in his own way izuku is helping these people!!!!  He may not be saving lives has a hero that he always wanted to be but he's giving them their hope and dream in a child they all want so izuku does his job proudly. the only sadness he gets from it that once it's over the baby isn't his anymore bc he's contracted to sign over his parental rights to his clients.

so he tries desperately not to fall desperately in love w/ each of the babies he had. it's... tough but he loves them all the same. the good point is that some of his clients will let him talk and meet w/ their child’s birth parent so izuku isn't deprived of that connection.

it's a quiet and unconventional job, but izuku is happy w/ this lifestyle that he had chosen even as it make DATING AN ABSOLUTE pain. how do you explain to ppl that no you're not marry yet or date anyone but you have several kids floating around all over japan in various household??? lol /o\ this made him feel terribly alone thinking how he wants a family of his own one day after seeing how he's making his client so happy w/ their new baby in their arms. happiness wrapped in a surreal sadness as he watched his babies w/ their new family wishing for that happiness for himself one day but while izuku is settled in his bubble of melancholy an solitude, katsuki BUSTED DOWN THAT DOOR when he made a requested to have a surrogate. NOT JUST ANYONE WILL DO, the best one you FUCKING GOT: experience, results, good health, strong quirk, smart, and not some fucking easy omega.

the qualifications and requirements are obscene and ridiculous lolol but he paid through the roof to get the absolute best for his future child. izuku hits every one of these markers except... for the quirk one. the program hesitate to bring the two to meet but katsuki is impatience. he had been delayed and delayed over and over again for months as they try to match up a good surrogate partner for him. every one of them he had quickly rejected v v loudly and walked out on the meeting. izuku is literally their last hope as katsuki throws another fit.

katsuki is getting older now, close to his 30s annd still stuck in singlehood while all his colleagues and friends settle down with a family of their own. his parents, esp his old hag, has been relentlessly nagging him to GIVE HER A BABY ALREADY SHE WANTS TO BE A GRANDMA BEFORE SHE DIE so w/ all kind of pressures, he said fuck it, i'll give you a fucking BABY but i dont need a mate to do it but in truth he earnestly does want a baby for his own bc the idea of raising a tiny human w/ all the trails and errors and potentially fucking up is humbling & huge responsibility.  he thinks he’s up for it like the pro-stage where he's standing at the top now, he can conquered it w sheer force and effort as he does w/ any challenge that he face. Parenthood will be his greatest battle and hurdle he has to overcome and he's going to fucking ACE IT. so katsuki is 10000% in this and he wants the best surrogate for his baby.

the program finally have izuku & katsuki meet after wasting 5 months of trying to find katsuki a suitable partner that he won't reject right away. so their first meeting go something like this: multiple slam doors, a table is flipped, and a lot of yelling.

it went great because izuku is hired right away. Just kidding.

katsuki had thought it was some giant fucking joke the moment izuku had walked through that door. "Who the fuck set this up?!" he demanded, kicking a coffee table over. so furious that his hands were shaking bc the idea of the length he'd went through and hoops he'd jumped over to get here JUST SO HE CAN BE MAKE A FOOL OUT OF, he'd stormed out a sec later, slamming doors violently on his way out and they had to dragged his ass back w/ the fervent promise that no IT'S NOT A PRANK AND WE HAVE NOTHING TO DO W/ CHARGEBOLT OR RED RIOT, PLS PLS LISTEN TO US.

he came back to izuku's unperturbed face as he took a sip of his coffee and katsuki snapped defensively, "i hope you won't fucking be drinking that piss when you're pregnant with my baby."

Unimpressed, Izuku replied, "good thing im not pregnant yet bc who said i would agree."

Flustered and red in the face w/ anger bc THE AUDACITY OF IZUKU TO REJECT HIM WHEN KATSUKI SHOULD BE THE ONE TO DOING IN THE FIRST PLACE!! izuku was the one who doesn't deserve to carry his child!! but the director of the program hurriedly assured him that izuku IS THE *BEST*. he got a pages of recommendation/referral, glowing reviews, and every client of his had never been happier bc of him. all his pregnancy were carried to full term and the babies are all good & strong. izuku himself go the gym when he's not on the job, keeping a healthy lifestyle. he doesn't drink or smoke (which katsuki emphasized in his requirement) and his family doesn't have any record any genetic disorder. he may not have finish college but he test high in his IQ and he take his job v v v seriously. the only problem was... he's quirkless.

it's a thing izuku always make it point for all his clients to know what they could potentially get w/ their children if they chose him. some walked away but most stayed with bc izuku is THE BEST OF THE BEST and they want kid more than they want a manufactured perfect child.

"will that be a problem?" izuku asked, meeting his eyes dead on. "does the thought of having a quirkless child anger you?"

katsuki bristles, clenching & unclenching his hands at his side. though no much had change over the years, he's older now, not that dumbass kid anymore, misguided by his own sense of pride and arrogance and warped by prejudice and the superiority of his quirk. He had left that behind in UA, who happily beaten the idiocy out of him. now, he doesn't care if his child is quirkless or not bc they're his and he'll raise and love them all the same. if the world treat his kid crap for being quirkless, he'll teach them to fuck the world up till it bow down and kiss their ass bc they're a bakugou and they don't settle for anything less, which brought back to the point that izuku REALLY IS THE BEST THEY GOT.

so he shook his head and said, "it doesn't matter whether they're quirkless or not bc they're mine and i always take good care of what's mine."

Izuku's eyes widen and for fraction of a second his cool mask of difference crack under katsuki's heartfelt and sincere words. They havent seen each other since middle school, that’s over a decade, and katsuki truly have grown up into someone the entire world can admire and hold up on a pedestal as the no. 1 hero in the country.

"And what about you? you're okay with me?" katsuki retorted. "with the kind of volatile *history* that we shared."

Izuku paused, and then, he said quietly, "i'm not that petty to deny you a child bc of our past bc neither of us are the kids we were back then."

katsuki stood up. "get him the paperworks and have him sign it. i want him and nobody else."

Izuku jerked up in surprised. "that's it? you dont want to ask me anything else? don't you want to go through my records and background to make sure that im the right fit for you."

katsuki stared down at him and it was like pinned under glass before he said, "we may have changed, but something are still the same. you still want to help ppl even if this is a roundabout way  to do it. i trust my instinct and my instinct is screaming at me to give you a fucking chance." He looked away, scratching the back of his head as he continued, "if there's one thing that is made clear to me now is that you're a good person and i was a shittyass kid for not realizing that sooner."

izuku's breath hitched. it's not an apology but it's damn close.

and with that he left izuku dizzy with a confusing cocktail of warmth, shock, and something far too nebulous and strange for him to put a finger to yet. when he first realized it was katsuki who was looking for a surrogate, he'd steel himself of the rejection & lashing out to come. izuku had spent his entire life rejected one way or another, so he was mentally prepare for this to be added to pile esp from the man who had hurt him repeatedly before. when katsuki had left for U.A. and izuku in the dust, they rarely have anything to do w/ each other after that even as he'd followed katsuki meteoric rise to the top, his blazing trajectory that placed him as the current no.1 bc despite everything, katsuki truly is amazing and deserved his place. he just never thought they would meet again in the sort of situation where a baby is the bargaining chip.

izuku was prepared for everything that katsuki would throw at him... but not his fervent agreement. now, izuku got to face the fact that for a year they're going to spend in each other pocket as izuku tries to carry not only katsuki's baby but his hope and future too. it's going to be either a total nightmare or some v v surreal dream bc it's bakugou katsuki with all that fame and temper and strong armed will and izuku is just... plain old izuku. he never had a client w/ such power and weight to throw around and so high profile that every know his name.

oh what did he sign up for, izuku thought as the door to the meeting room was slammed open again and katsuki glared at the director. "wait i want it all to be done today," katsuki said. "put my sperms in him as soon as possible."

izuku dropped his face into his hand and sighed.

the process of getting izuku impregnated is all v clinical and boring. izuku goes under a pseudo heat simulation that fool his body to think he's actually going into heat so his fertility up even more so during this period and he get artificially inseminated w/ katsuki's sperm. this is actually a process and takes several days & even weeks to prepare bc waiting for izuku's most fertile window during his heat period is v v important to have higher chance of success NORMALLY but w/ advance tech izuku can go under a pseudo heat that trigger release of eggs  so they can get it all done pretty quickly and dont have to wait for nature to set it up for them.

katsuki already provided enough sperm to last a fucking lifetime bc he's an overly prepared asshole and it's three days later when they meet back at the clinic to start the process. all of this is under the watchful care of doctors and nurses to make sure everything go right. izuku had done this many times before for his previous clients so this isn't new to him at all but it's the first time that a client specifically demand to be part of the entire process.

izuku stares him down and tells him in no uncertain detail bc it's already weird enough to be the one to carry his former childhood friend's baby but to have him watch izuku get inseminated w/ his sperm?? YEA OK, no. katsuki glowers bc he just want everything to GO SMOOTHLY. his micromanagement & obsessiveness drives the clinic insane but izuku kinda finds it funny and cute?? maybe bc he's aware that it's just katsuki's nerves acting up since this is so terribly new and terrifying for him and HE DOESN'T LIKE IT WHEN THINGS ARENT UNDER HIS CONTROL.

neither katsuki or izuku is alone this bc surrogacy isn't about either them it's about the baby and the ppl who helps make it possible and that's both of them. the surrogate who carries the unborn fetus and donor who gives a part of themselves to make it all possible. izuku hesitates before deciding screw it & reaches out and holds katsuki's hand in comfort AS THOUGH KATSUKI THE ONE GETTING THE PROCEDURE DONE TO HIM. "i'll be fine," he insists. "i've done this plenty of times before and dr. abe even longer than that with 20yrs of experience so i'll be ok."

"I'm not worry," katsuki snaps, even though he squeezes Izuku's hand hard enough that izuku is afraid his bones might crack under the pressure. "i know you'll be fucking fine, wont he dr. abe?" he stares down at the doctor with the full force of his wrath that the doctor shifts nervously.

"o-of course, bakugou-san," dr abe is quick to assure him. "our best ppl is on the job."

izuku rolls his eyes bc while heat inducing artificial insemination isn't exactly a new tech but there's a risk to any kind of medical procedure. it's low though and izuku isn't worry.

katsuki lets him go and izuku just sends him a quick reassuring smile over his shoulder even as katsuki can't take his eyes off of the entire trip to the surgical room. the process takes around 1-2 hours max & izuku comes out of it mostly woozy & still under heat related stress.

he needs to rest the next few days as he lets nature and w/ the help of science takes it course. izuku rests up at the clinic that provide him 24hrs care to make sure everything is alright which is all normal and part of the procedure. what surprise him is that katsuki visiting him DAILY. he actually bring izuku's home cooked meals that are carefully & thoughtfully prepared (healthy food choices!!) that it silences him for a moment.

"you know im not pregnant yet," izuku points out helpfully. "do you want me to explain how biology work in case UA didn't go over it in their curriculum?"

"shut your face and just eat," katsuki says with a glower, and watches intensely as izuku eats every bite and not leave a single piece behind. while there he harasses izuku's nurses and doctors, asking for izuku's vital stats and probing questions about the surgery & his health.it's so annoying and overbearing, but izuku can't help the smile threatening to break through his defense bc that's just like katsuki shoving his business into everything and dominating the entire process even though it is IZUKU who is going through it all. it's dreadfully cute.

izuku is fully recovered after several days of rest as expected and he is, once again surprised, to see katsuki is right there every step of the way as he is release from the clinic. katsuki who took a short shift today just so he can pick izuku up, which IS SUPER RARE. katsuki is a total workaholic and married to his job kind of pro hero so for him to take half a day off is beyond shocking for everyone?? bc HE GOT ENOUGH VACATION/SICK DAYS TO TAKE SEVERAL MONTHS OFF w/o any worry, but he came to take izuku home and make sure everything is in order.

it's not that izuku didn't have any clients wanting to be so involve in the whole surrogacy/pregnancy process but katsuki takes it into a whole new lvl w/ how much he inserts himself into izuku's life like it's not just the baby he care about but izuku too. he delivers izuku home and make sure izuku have his emergency contacts at all time in case ANYTHING, ABSOLUTEY ANYTHING HAPPEN and he wants izuku to text him daily with updates even for stupid things. he's obsessive and demanding and nervous, and izuku thinks it's funny as hell.

so for the next several weeks, izuku flood katsuki's phone w/ commentary about his days that HAS NOTHING TO DO W/ his chance of being pregnant. since izuku full time job is just being a surrogate, he mostly spend his days wandering around the city, reading, volunteering, etc. izuku updates katsuki on his daily activities and while he doesn't always get a reply immediately but his updates are always left on read and sometimes katsuki would leave some *encouraging* word like 'yea,' or 'okay' and izuku doesn't know why but he finds them comforting all the same.

 when he wanders around the city, he'll text katsuki his coordinates bc katsuki is paranoid &wants him to keep away from dangerous area or area under villain attack, he would take pictures of the heroes he see and katsuki would have a snarky comments on each & every one of them. it's in this moments that the two of them really come alive. izuku get a glimpse of the world that he could have had if he had a quirk and pursue his dream of going pro hero and insights on what it's like to be bakugou katsuki, the man standing at the pinnacle of the pro hero scene.

At this point katsuki is even more engaged in izuku's text now. he becomes interest in the books izuku is currently reading, the outreach programs izuku super passionate about esp for young and disenfranchise quirkless youths. then there are izuku's rowdy neighbors and their hilariously complicated love life that izuku is terribly invested bc of his lack of one.

"i think higa-san is going to break up with him today," izuku would update him one day, after watching his neighbors have another blow out.

katsuki texts back an hour later: "yea right, the guy is spineless coward. he wouldn't ever go through it."

izuku lets out a smile as he stares down at the text. it's the most fun izuku ever had in the middle of a job that he forget they're not friends at all but client and surrogate. this is a job for him and izuku is an end to a mean for katsuki. it doesn't mean anything. It couldn’t mean anything. Why is he even trying?

Izuku has been doing the job for seven years and carried his pregnancy to full terms five times. he knows the routine even though each client he had were different from one another and not all pregnancy are the same, but he knows what to expect and prepare. nothing truly surprised him anymore. Or at least they shouldn’t. ,his world didn't suddenly change w/ katsuki's arrival in his ordinary life. izuku is still very much the same person, but all the same he wake up everyday w/ renews energy and lightens heart, looking forward to seeing the text notification from katsuki popping up on his phone screen.

he finds himself looking forward to their interaction the most throughout his days. a glimpse into katsuki's world and what it means to be a part of his life again however temporary it is bc izuku knows there is a time limit to this. he's only allow to talk like this w/ katsuki bc he's doing him a favor, a job, an obligation in exchange of money. they're in a relationship artificially made, they're not friends or colleagues and izuku may be carrying katsuki's baby in the future but he's not a parent w/ katsuki.

He’s an incubator.

these thoughts feel tangibly familiar to his past cases where he had carried the fetus to full term and had to part ways with his baby and the client/parents and separate himself from their lives after the birth but it had never hurt in this way like the thoughts alone would cut his heart into pieces now. it's beyond selfish to get attach and izuku tries to maintain a careful distance w/ katsuki bc they're client and an employee, but katsuki is relentless. he won't settle for just for pieces of izuku and his life. he wants it all. Izuku may be weak enough to give it to him…

 he invests himself into izuku's life, his interest, his worries and thoughts. to katsuki, izuku isn't just an incubator but someone who shares the other half of his baby's genes so of fucking course he IS INVESTED BC izuku is just as important as the fetus he could be carrying right now but izuku has a hard time wrapping his head around it bc while izuku was w/ his other client they were all kind and caring to him during his surrogacy but never to this length. they weren't interest in him as a person but someone who is a means to an end, a tool to make their dream come true.

izuku isn't hurt by that regard bc he knows getting involve w/ your surrogate can be a hot mess & confusing for the baby growing up so izuku knows how to keep his distance and careful to keep his heart walled up but katsuki has a habit of breaking things. He’s so very, very good at it, especially distubring the peace of izuku’s heart.

katsuki may be relentless w/ his attention & dedication but izuku's walls went down embarrassingly easy as though he was waiting for katsuki to reach out toward him after all the years apart and shake him loose from his bubble of solitude. katsuki doesn't realize how affected izuku is by his clumsy and gestures, but izuku won't tell. He’s too embarrassed to ever bring it up because even after all these years katsuki still has such a sever effect on him.

so izuku lends himself to enjoy this upcoming months as much as he can bc once it's over they will part ways again as though they exist solely in different space and the only chance he'll get to see katsuki and the baby is through the screen of his tv. it doesn't bring him any comfort but it's manageable. izuku can deal with it. he got years to get used to it by now.  It’s not gentle but it’s a blunt kind of truth that mend with time.

several weeks after since izuku did the procedure, he doesn't feel any different but izuku wakes up one morning and he could feel a strangeness settling over his body. there are a lot of old wives tales about pregnant omegas and women and most of them are false, standing against scientific knowledge but izuku been going around this block five times already, so he realizes there may be some truths to a few of them.

he gets out of bed and makes breakfast before making sure to send a text and photo to katsuki about his meals bc katsuki is ANAL about making izuku eat right. katsuki motherhenning him miles away even as he is out on patrol is still the most hilarious and weirdly sweet thing, izuku finds. it doesn't feel suffocating at all to him. sometimes he when the thought slip out of him unconsciously he thinks this is what it's like to have an alpha of his own, but katsuki isn't his by any means.

izuku forgoes his favorite breakfast meal this time and go for something he rarely eats. a food that he normally doesn't chose but it feels right this time. it all clicks. the signs were all there several days back. the frequent bathroom usage, his breasts throbbing, and cramps. he'd seen it already but this morning it lines up perfectly like it was all meant to be, like everything is built up just for this moment right here.

so with a bounce to his steps, he waits for katsuki's text back. It takes a few mins when katsuki get back from his morning run bc he got a routine and is terribly predictable in that regard. his following texts rip into izuku's choice of food bc IT ISN'T HIS USUAL at all and katsuki have colorful words about the kind of junk izuku force feed into his body and DOESN'T HE KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF HIMSELF. HOW THE FUCK DID HE SURVIVES ALL THESE YEARS ON HIS OWN.

izuku smiles down at his phone even though katsuki is blasting him and everything he choose to be, but HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT ALL MEANS. it's kinda adorable so when katsuki get into a slow rant about food group and healthy life choices, izuku cuts in:

me: oh btw im pregnant :)

he didn't get any get any respond from katsuki for the next five mins so during that time izuku makes fresh cup of juice to drink while katsuki works to settle down his panic. when he comes back fifteen mins later, it's to a series of angry keymash and texts.

kacchan: a;sjdasdf

kacchan: as;dlifucccck

kacchan: fuck fuck fuck

kacchan: are you serious?!

kacchan: DONT FUCKING JOKE WIHT ME DEKU

kacchan: i'm coming over right now

kacchan: you better be sitting down

kacchan: don't fucking move even an inch

kacchan: YOU HEAR ME

me: ok

izuku sits there peacefully, enjoying his cup of juice as he waits for katsuki's arrival. one of his hand rests over his stomach carefully & though he hadn't taken any test or get his bloodwork done, he knows, instinctively & intimately that there is a life growing inside of him.

it's all very silly and unproven since there's no concrete evidence to support any of it, but maybe it's his omega instinct, maybe it's his experience as a carrier who brought five children into this world, or maybe it's just wishful thinking on his part, but he knows and this is a truth that won’t be brought down.

izuku takes his job v seriously bc people's happiness hinged on his ability to give them a child they earnestly had wished for so he of course he would want to be pregnant as soon as possible, but--izuku looks down at his stomach, this time even more so he wants it to be real.

 he wants to be the one to fulfilled katsuki's earnest wish and give him the child he desired. it's as much a part of his job, his duty, but also something he selfishly wants for himself. this baby, this child will be his only connection to katsuki once his job his completed. they'll part ways after this--no more late night phone calls, morning texts, and silly anecdotes they exchange to each other everyday bc izuku is unlikely to ever see him again. their worlds are just too far apart, like the two planets stuck in orbit but never meeting but at least with this child, izuku knows there is always a piece of him w/ katsuki always. so more than anything, this child will be his gift to katsuki.

he picks up his phone & sends katsuki a text.

me: if you dont mind, could you pick up a pregnancy test just to be sure?

izuku knows himself & his body, but he wants to be 110% sure for katsuki's sake. he doesn't want to get katsuki's hope up only to crush it later. katsuki's respond back is quick and telling.

kacchan: will three do?

kacchan: do you need anything else?

kacchan: i'll get them

izuku pauses, frowning hard as he looks down at his phone.

me: please don't text and drive

me: also, try stay below the speed limits

me: i dont want you to die before you see your child.

this time it takes longer to get a respond back.

kacchan: dont fucking talk to me about the speed laws kacchan: im not a reckless idiot

kacchan: my entire job description is to uphold the law so degenerates dont fucking run amok

kacchan: ... im not driving right now

izuku's brows furrow in thought before a smile cracks across his face.

me: kacchan... did you pull over to the side just to yell at me?

me: that's so terribly cautious and cute of you :3c

me: you're already on your way to becoming a great dad.

kacchan: FUCK YOU!!!!!!

Izuku laughs, light and so tinged with joy that it feels so strange to him to be this happy about something silly as this.

me: not a chance but thanks.

me: dont forget to buy my pregnancy test and i dont need anything else. just come here as soon as possible afterward

and he leaves it that. katsuki doesnt text him back anymore, leaving izuku to wait for his arrival with anticipation. he should get up and clean the apartment so it's presentable at least to katsuki. he hadn't had a guest in a while so this would get a good change but katsuki's warning still loop in his head. getting up to clean the apartment would constitute moving around and izuku is barely into his first trimester so, it's not like he's straining his body or anything. katsuki is just being an overbearing anxious new father.

izuku had seen that before in his past clients, who constantly fret over izuku's health but they're not THE GROUND ZERO and he has the nagging suspicious that he doesn't want to test katsuki's thinning patience with him. it's fun to tease him like this but he knows his limit. so izuku continues to sit there & waits, playing w/ his phone as he scrolls through the hero news site to check any interesting updates. izuku may have long let go of his dream but he can't disconnect from it completely. it's how he stay in the loop w/o actually being a part of it.

izuku's eyes widen as he spots a tweet on the #groundzero tag on twitter that sits atop of all others: "no jokes, guys i think i just a saw #groundzero stormed into my store and headed toward the omega’s hygiene care aisle. he bought a bunch of stuff before heading out.”

it already got a several thousands likes and retweets, with a flood of comments that ranged from "what?? sounds fake lol" or "okay, who would have guess gz would be the one to secretly keeping an omega on the side" and others are filled with more confusion and disbelief.

izuku makes a face. his contract binds him to confidentially and assurance that his identity remains quiet. he never had any problem with his identity being exposed w/ any of previous clients but then again he never had such a famous client before. this--is going to be a headache. he chews down on his lower lip in thought as he shuts down his phone. he's going to have to remind katsuki to be more careful next time lest they figure out what katsuki is up to... and who izuku is to him. not his friend, not his sweetheart, not his omega but his surrogate.

just as izuku ponders about doing damage control, there is a series of loud insistent knocks on his apartment door. izuku blinks and hurriedly to the door w/o any thought who is on the other side bc somehow he knows it got to be *him*.

he opens to door to katsuki's scowling face.

"i told you to not fucking move," katsuki scolds, and pushes his way inside w/o any invite, carefully moving izuku to the side like izuku is made of glass which make izuku annoyed right away but also painfully fond in that . he's an overprotective idiot but he's trying and that's--*something*.

 "how else would i let you in then," izuku retorts, rolling his eyes as he leads katsuki into apartment. "im only couple of weeks pregnant at most and you're already asking for miracles."

katsuki scoffs but doesn't argue as he hands izuku a full plastic bag. "okay, start peeing."

"I--" Izuku opens the bag and looks inside, staring down at the pregnancy tests stuffed to the rim of the small bag, all eleven boxes of them, "I dont have enough pee for this."

katsuki frowns. "drink a lot of water then," he suggests.

Izuku shoots him a glare. "that's not funny," he snaps.

katsuki's frowns deepen. "i'm not being funny," he says.

Izuku sighs and just digs his hand into the bag to grab a handful of the boxes. "i'll do only two so dont even." he throws the rest of the bag at katsuki and heads toward the bathroom.

it horrifyingly takes them all 30mins to be done w/ the tests bc katsuki v loudly insisted that he should do more than two, kept on banging on the bathroom door to let him know that. izuku gritted his teeth and took three more and really DID RAN OUT OF PEE AFTER THE FIFTH ONE.

the wait for the test results which only take a mins or two is ramped up by katsuki anxiously pacing back and forth in front of izuku until izuku grabs him by the sleeve of his shirt and drags him down to the sit next to him in the couch. "it'll be okay," he assures katsuki.

katsuki scowls and brushes off his touch, but he seems to breathe a little easier after that. the first three tests gives them a positive, the fourth is a negative, and the fifth is a positive. izuku frowns at the result. he knows in his heart that is w/o a doubt pregnant and the majority of the results support that but, he casts a nervous glance katsuki whose face is seemingly troubled, that's probably not enough for katsuki who spend a load of money to afford izuku's time, commitment, and body. Izuku is expensive but so is katsuki’s time and investment.

he definitely wants more than a dubious result that isn't 100% guarantee that izuku's pregnant and even if izuku tells him that he is truly pregnant bc izuku knows his own body, that may not go well either. "we can get the bloodwork done tomorrow to check for sure," izuku tries to assures him. Sometimes science speak louder than a parental instinct.

katsuki stares at him, eyes so intently focus on izuku that he feels like's a butterfly pinned under katsuki's gaze. abruptly, he reaches a hand out and grabs Izuku's own, giving it a quick and purposeful squeeze. "Move in with me," he says, sounding so grave and serious.

izuku gets up from his seat. "Do you want something to drink?" he asks, already heading toward the kitchen. "suddenly, im parched."

"did you hear what i just said?!" katsuki demands, trailing after him like a yapping puppy on his heels. "And sit the fuck down! let me get it."

abruptly, izuku stops and turns around to face katsuki with a glower on his face. "im just pregnant and not an invalid," he snaps, annoyance prickling at him. he had been doing this longer than katsuki could even imagine. "And i can get the drinks myself in my *own* home thank you." katsuki's eyes widen slightly at the sharp tone izuku had quickly adapted and heaves a sigh, carding a hand through his hair in frustration like izuku is the one being purposely difficult here. "I--fuck--" He frowns, face scrunches as he search for his next words. izuku waits it out, patient and silence against the inner turmoil that must now be swirling inside of katsuki.

katsuki's gaze drops to the floor, hands balling at his side. his breathing even out as he grimaces. "sorry," he finally settles on with a quiet mumble.

Izuku steps back in surprise. shock, really. "w--wait can repeat that again because i just thought i heard you apologized without any prompting."

katsuki flushes, ducking his head. "shut the fuck up. im not going to repeat myself," he rebukes, but the damage had been done.

Despite the years tempering his recklessness out he can't help wanting to poke the hornet's nest. "i honestly didn't think sorry was in your vocabulary, kacchan," he teases, grinning.

katsuki flinches back as though struck, surprising izuku once more. the words were said in jest, meant to ease katsuki into a laugh or close to it at least but something like pained flickers across Katsuki's face that immediately izuku wants to take it all back, but katsuki's expression had already closed up.

Izuku's heart hurt, thinking that he'd lost him. he'd pushed too hard. they're aren't friends, barely acquaintances really. just a client-employee dynamic that izuku should have been careful of. he always know where to toe the line of the boundaries of his job and with his client, but--they were doing so well that he'd hoped. been so hopeful because it had almost feels like they were sort of friends again.

izuku and katsuki had always orbit each other's world but childish pride, anger, and superiority had torn them apart and izuku was pushed out of Katsuki’s life. now that they're older, izuku is no longer that child blindingly infatuated with this remarkable person before him. he knows what he's capable of and katsuki had certainly earned his place at the top of the world but he won't be cowed either. so it's fine if katsuki doesn't want to fall back into a some kind of make shift friendship with him. it's fine if he just want to think izuku is just a walking incubator for his child. izuku will survive. He had survive this long without katsuki ‘s looming shadow after all.

katsuki hunches over as he grits his teeth. "fuck."

izuku blinks.

  "i'm not that shitty fucked up kid anymore," katsuki nearly growl out, pinning izuku with a look of full intent. "I'm," he swallows, hesitant, wary, "i'm trying to be a better person, a friend, a son, and most importantly a father now that we have a spawn coming our way."

Izuku's heart quickens at the 'we' usage even though it probably means nothing. nothing at all. katsuki was only just opening himself to him. this is something that startling new and truly welcoming experience for katsuki and izuku shouldn't mistake it for anything else. he can't be too greedy. so he steps forward, wanting to reach out and touch katsuki to affirm of his existence, but he doesn't. not when katsuki is like an exposed wire right now--twitchy, nervous, and just a little shy of imploding from carving himself open for izuku to see all his true feelings and motives.

izuku smiles.

"If i didn't think you were a good person then i wouldn't have entrusted this child,” he touches his still flat stomach, knowing life is stirring underneath his palm, "with you." katsuki truly had grown up. he'll be a good father, izuku muses but it's a bittersweet feeling. "i still want my independence though," he continues. "i've done this many times before so you can stop treating me like i'm going to break if you breath the wrong way. thousands and millions of omegas and women have been doing this a lot longer than me and they're fine. im fine, so breathe."

katsuki's presses his lip together into a grim line. "I know that," he shakes his head, "but you dont have to this alone. i'll want to be there with you every step of the way even if it mean you need someone to run to the grocery store for some shitty midnight craving. I want to be the first person you think about when you need any kind of assistance not because you're weak or helpless but because you just need someone, so let me be that person for you," he finishes, looking on in pained after spouting such sweet sentiments.

it makes izuku want to laugh, but he doesn't think that would be welcoming right now because katsuki still got his pride after all. "I'll think about it," he acquiesce, heart warming several hundred degrees as though he's standing under the direct sunlight of bakugou katsuki.

katsuki grimaces, clearly unhappy with izuku's non-answer but he relents anyway with a long heave. "ok, ok, i can deal with that," he says like the words alone was hard enough to swallow, "but if you change your mind at any moment just let fucking know!"

Oh, no, izuku thinks helplessly. he wants to give katsuki a treat for being so annoyingly overbearing but considerate in his own clumsy ways. "well, if you behave yourself, i might even consider taking you with me to my OBGYN doc this thursday," he says casually with a shrug.

Katsuki scowls, but he stands up straighter. "I'll--" he looks away, flushed with an earnest yearning spread across his face, "be good, okay?"

Izuku quietly tucks a smile between his pressed lips before it break through even though this is terrible for his weak, weak heart.

#bakudeku #not!fic #surrogate au #hi SORRY im back now #i got distracted by uh reading some stuff so i didn't keep up with my post QQ

[gyeommine]

MONSTA X as Roommates

wow sorry this has been a LONG absence. i am swimming in school work and deadlines atm so bear w me. my final exams are this year so i am trying my best love u all <3

(all gif creds to the original owners)

Shownu:

( AN ACTUAL ANGEL )

okay so he’s a typical male but he tries really really hard okay?

he’ll say he will do his chores, make his bed or do his laundry

but he’s a busy sweetie

so he’ll fall asleep in a crumpled duvet

and it melts your heart so you have to do it

and he’ll always thank you super sincerely where his eyes disappear into his face and honestly ur roommate is the most adorable human alive.

u always catch him being an actual dad

he’ll be in his favourite sofa crevice, scratching his chin w his arm up in that position the bois make fun of him for.

and you have to try with all your might to not burst out laughing

instead you send a picture to the mx groupchat.

it’s called tender blackmail.

he also falls asleep on the sofa a lot but u can’t move him so

another dad thing he does is that he’s lowkey super protective

he’s not often an emotional person so it’s quite well hidden

but he does worry if you’re home later than him and will probably call u.

and will let out a prominent sigh of relief when you respond

lets you wear the baggy shirts he doesn’t wear anymore or so he claims

it just makes him chuckle when his shirts completely drown you

you also get to see a v sincere side to shownu

you can clearly see how his performing on top of variety shows exhausts him (esp when he claims variety is not his thing)

but he’ll never snap at you when he’s like that

because he’s so sincerely appreciative of having you around

but doesn’t disguise his dumbness

you guys can’t have many expensive ornaments

bc he’ll go to thoughtfully polish it to cheer you up

and end up breaking it

he’s a literal sweetheart that tries so hard, love him please

Wonho:

(wOW i would protecc this man w all my heart. purest)

he would be the sweetest roommate in th world

even tho he’s busy 24/7

he’ll sometimes randomly buy you your usual coffee

or he’ll see you’re almost out of milk or something

where he’ll promptly restock so you don’t have to

he’s incredibly thoughtful

it makes you a lil sad sometimes when he’s particularly busy

bc you miss him like crazy

but when he gets the chance, he makes sure he hangs out w you and dedicate some set time to his best friend

bc he really appreciates you

you’re both each other’s main support

he knows that when he walks in through the door after a shit day

you’ll be sat on the sofa ready to hear him out

it leads to way too many profound chats till like 3 in the morning

he’s a lil’ bit protective

on the rare occasion he’s not working and you’re not home

he’ll be snapchatting you, texting you

‘wonho i was just at the gym?’ ‘can i come too??!!”

and then suddenly you’re hanging out as per

living w wonho is the chillest thing

except when he neglects to wear a shirt when he’s having a lazy day

and you’re red in the face, throwing fabrics at him to cover him damn self.

friends or not it’s illegal for wonho to walk around like that

you both gel without arguments

you like the same films, music and even like to eat at similar places

never any arguments over takeout lol

you even end up giving each other skin care tips 

which makes for a pretty blissful living arrangement if you ask me.

Minhyuk:

(a visual??????)

okay you two are the ultimate best friends.

you have a long list of movies and tv series/anime that you two have to watch together

primarily because you know how whiny and salty he will be if u break it 

you’re both pretty relaxed roommates

like the dishes don’t need to be done right this second

magically chores still get done

thankfully, minhyuk isn’t the typical gross male

but he will probably shamelessly steal food that you have labelled

which is probably the only source of any conflict in your house.

when you’re both at home

you better believe this loud ass will wake you up super early to go do something together

“time to bond (y/n)!!!!” “what r u, 5?”

but you’re lowkey kinda grateful that he wants to do stuff with you

since you’re always afraid you’ll lose him to his schedule

you’re still super super close

you guys create your own dance routines and memorise current choreos that are trending 

you prank each other, which may involve you printing pre-debut pictures of minhyuk and plastering them everywhere

you have you’re own handshake that may or may not last for like 5 minutes

and if either of you forget it oH THE b e t r a y a l

did i mention that minhyuk is a massive drama queen?

but in a funny way (unlike a certain member who’s about to follow)

you will have named your shared apartment, no doubt

and will reference its name in the invites of the house parties you guys host

you basically act like siblings when their parents go out for the evening... 24/7...

Kihyun:

(his smile could sAVE lives. it’s so bright)

the ‘drama queen’ i previously mentioned

if u wanted a relaxed roommate, dude look elsewhere

i reckon yoo kihyun is a clean freak

he is mad about a rota of chores, to ensure it’s equal

but i can imagine him redoing them anyway if they weren’t done exactly how he normally does it.

this causes some some minor bickering

it’s always resolved when you ask what you’re doing for dinner that night

you guys have this insane ability to just drop arguments in a flash

which is why the intense cleaning regime never bothers you

plus, it contents your parents that you don’t live in a pig sty

(and silently wish that they could hire kihyun to clean on the side)

but beneath the bitterness, he can be super thoughtful

he’ll remember a food you were craving that one time

and suddenly you’ll find it in the cupboards

when you ask, he’ll shrug it off 

but he lowkey loves to cook for you.

you guys will love to buy furniture together

prepare yourself for many trips to look at random decorations or house plants to liven up your two dead souls

relishing the simple joys like buying new plates or cutlery like the secretly middle aged people you are.

surprisingly, yall have a v similar ideal

i can just picture this modern (not to mention spotless), monochromatic apartment in seoul

mx and your friends will be so jealous of how well you run your appartment together

although they quietly question your friendship, yall get it each other

your closeness is measured in bitterness and insults

and you don’t really need anyone to understand your friendship

bc it works

Hyungwon:

(ONE OF THE BEST LOOKING PPL IN KPOP HANDS DOWN hOLD me)

this living arrangement will be the exact opposite to living w kihyun

“organised mess”

it’s just you guys are always so busy with your careers and lives

so tidiness happens to be the bottom of the priority list

except when parents come over

then you’re doing hurdles over each other to tidy up

trying to find as many convenient dark spots in the place to hide unwashed laundry

when you are both at home

it’s a quiet contentedness in each other's company

you’ll most likely message each other instead of yell

but when you do call out to him, it usually takes 3-6 times before you receive at least a mumble in response

you’ll probably text each other when you’re right next to each other

well, if hyungwon’s even awake

you will definitely leave passive aggressive notes to each other

‘close the cupboard u moron - love (y/n) xoxo’

and hyungwon will reply on the same cupboard door

‘even ur writing is loud omg - hyungwon’

and the door will be wide ajar

and you’re genuinely not sure whether he hasn’t noticed the actual issue or is blatantly ignoring it

nevertheless, it’s your guys’ sense of humour

you guys probably stay up a lot together when you’re both free and not feeling up to doing much

a few beers while watching some b-rate movie to laugh at

but the film will soon be forgotten and you’ll be talking about anything from love to what vegetable you identify with

and end up falling asleep on the sofa next to each other at 6 am

and the cycle starts all over again

Jooheon:

(one of the sweetest dimpled people alive)

a golden, pure apartment

you guys are inseparable and the cutest friends alive

yall really take care of each other, even if its a little out yours’ way

you both can immediately sense when something is wrong

when you drag your feet into the flat, your face completely drained

jooheon is alert and ready to let you rant about your day

and he’ll offer to pay for food that night or cook something

likewise with him. you just sense when he needs a cry or a moan.

you guys are also super goofy

jumping around like 10 year olds to your favourite playlists

having your own lip sync battles and completely slaying the raps

i can also imagine you two having a redecorating day together

you playfully bickering over a shade of blue for the living room

idk it just seems like something you guys would do together

you also leave sweet notes for each other

especially if you don’t see each other at home for a while

you’ll wake up to a lil’ sticky note wishing you a pleasant day

it’s honestly sickly sweet

you’ll prank and tease the other members when they come over

because you guys are an unstoppable, mischievous duo

unfortunately shownu doesn’t really scare like jooheon does

so the tables over turn :/

jooheon has also put a ban on horror movies 

because he’s so jumpy and he knows he’ll never live it down

you guys will also share a bed in a completely platonic way

like you have just missed your best friend

so you have a sleepover... in the flat you share... as adults

everybody just assumes you’re dating and mx think you should

esp when jooheon gets lowkey jealous when you go on dates, since he’s so openly protective of you

but you guys know where you’re at

and you’re happy as best friends

I.M:

(i love this gif of changkyun. look at his cheeks ahhhh)

you guys are long-term childhood friends so the apartment vibe is chill

you have been friends so damn long, you know exactly how each other click so there are rarely any problems

if there is, you threaten to blackmail w the thousands of ugly photos you have of him.

then you remember he has an equal amount as you, and the actual issues is dropped within seconds

because you guys are still goofy through it al

like i said, it’s a v chill household

chores get magically done, eventually, but there’s no real rush

but you are both rarely there to have to thrive in it

it does make kihyun want to die a little when he visits

changkyun is often at his own studio

and you’ll receive calls asking you to listen to something he’s produced and see what you think of it

it means you guys end up spending more time at his studio than the apartment you both pay for lmao

but it doesn’t bother either of you

sometimes, it does take some prompting from you to stop him from overworking himself

what you guys love to do is go out on drives

just drive somewhere completely random, sit and watch the night creep in

you guys can pretty much talk for hours and hours

be it reminiscing, talking about the future or about the new music that you have been listening to

this does mean changkyun always has headphones in

so you’ll have to call his name repeatedly to get his attention 

your apartment will also always smell good

you both end up buying heaps and heaps of incense and candles

careful in not making the landlord believe you guys are doing drugs lmao

but it just creates such a relaxed atmosphere

and you don’t have to think too hard when buying each other presents

sorry if the lengths aren’t v well balanced. i had LOADS of ideas for some members and fewer for others. curse of writer’s brain grrrr. some of these were so cute, and i would so room w changkyun tbh

#monsta x #mx #monsta x reactions #monsta x scenarios #monsta x aus #monsta x imagines #monsta x fluff #mx reactions #mx scenarios #mx aus #mx imagines #mx fluff #shownu #hyunwoo #son hyunwoo #wonho #hoseok #lee hoseok #minhyuk #lee minhyuk #kihyun #yoo kihyun #hyungwon #chae hyungwon #jooheon #lee jooheon #i.m #changkyun #im changkyun #kpop

[matazz]

letters roy endoza never sent

so i wrote these because i wanted to write out roy’s feelings to the party members. it was mostly a way to vent, but during the time, i really did want to send them - but my DM never let me (if you’re reading this LOL).

there’s something a bit sadder about it being letter’s he never sent.

in my head, he left along the journal that he wrote as well with the letters he left behind. i guess canonically i can say that the party never ended up finding them. 

group letter (written after roy left the party & before the gala)

for the group, i had fun while we were charading around finding ancient artifacts and solving puzzles. i’m going to miss our adventure, but i have to leave. i’ve involved myself against the fate of the universe, a crime against all odds. i’ve loved knowing you all and you’ve all helped me so much but i dont want to involve you anymore in it. more importantly i feel as if that my actions may draw a rift in your beliefs and i dont want to seperate that bond. please do not look for me. i’m afraid i serve no purpose in this mission with the champions anymore. i dont think the gods (and even myself) consider myself to be a champion anymore. to be quite honest with you, i don’t know what the consequences are or what might be from my actions but i will deal with it myself. i’m going to be honest. i appreciate all of you, and you’ve helped me in learning so much. about the world, magic, and other people. but i don’t want to involve any of you in my life and i don’t want to see any of you ever again. please do not try to contact me or find me. this is my departure letter. i am safe, and i am well, and i dont want to be involved with the champions anymore. i hope everybody does well. i’m sorry i left without saying anything but it had to be this way. it’s better for me this way, for everyone. i’ll stay safer this way. if the gods tell you to locate me, please ignore them their calls. i can not say why, but if you trust me at all, please believe me when i say i’m safer not meeting you. sincerely, roy endoza.

To the group (i think this was written the day of the gala, but before the Thing happened)

To the Champions, I’m not sure when this letter will deliver, so you might receive it a bit late. I’ve left for a while to pursue my own goals and research some things. I'm not sure when I'll be back, or if I'll even be back at all. There's been so much nagging at me that distances myself from all of you and I don't really feel like I belong so much anymore anyway. I don’t know whether or not my research is going to succeed, but if on the event that something happens, please don’t look for me. To be quite frank, I don’t really want to involve any of you in my research and I’m afraid that meeting you is only going to be a liability to me. On the unlikely event that my research turns out to be negative, I'll come back; however if that’s not the case then please don’t try to contact me and do not look for me. I can not stress this enough, but what I’m about to go through with is going to upset the gods and more importantly, all of you. It hurts to leave like this, but I have to say farewell. I loved travelling with most of you and I’ve learnt more about the world than I ever could have just staying at my house in Origin. Thank you so much for the adventure. Perhaps for the last time, Roy Endoza.

To Ayce (written the day of the gala i think)

Ayce, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to talk to you before I left. To be honest, I couldn’t bring myself to do it and I haven’t had the time or the nerve to say anything. I regret all of that, but you deserve at least something before I leave. I can’t continue our relationship.. I’ve felt distant for a while now, and it’s been nagging at me but I don’t think we’re good for eachother at all. I’ve been a dishonest man to you despite the fact that you’ve been honest with me the entire time. I know it makes me an asshole. You deserve so much better than I could ever be to you. I wish there was more I could say. You've probably figured it out already, and if you have then I already know it was pretty selfish or stupid of me to start this relationship despite the fact that I've known all along how it was going to turn out. You don't have to forgive me. I wouldn't either. And if you haven't figured it out, then I hope it wasn't so terrible for you. I've enjoyed my time with you. I hope you find someone better. Roy.

A letter to Ayce (written like the day roy left)

ayce i have a lot i’ve been meaning to say to you but havent had the time or the nerve to say anything. but i need to say it now because you deserve these words. i can no longer continue our relationship. i’ve redeemed myself but in doing so, i’ve gone against the world; but more importantly, to you. i love you very much, and i wish i could have come to the ball with you and danced. i would have loved to; but i have a lot going on and i dont want to involve you, or anybody else in our charade, involved in my problems. i’m sorry i could not say it to your face. i hope life treats you well. you deserve so much better than i could ever have been. with love roy

Letter to Ayce (dated from the week before roy left)

ayce i’m writing this because i didnt have the nerves to say this in person, and i apologize for that. to be honest, the more time passes the more o begin to think our relationship was a mistake, so i’m officially parting ways. i never lied when i said i love you. i still do, but i just dont think it has worked out or even will. i think our morals are too different; and i cant find myself being with somebody who finds it so easy to murder a person. no matter how terrible she was, i thought that you of all people may have disapproved after experiencing death already. i also found myself attached to Fox, so his leaving leaves a hole in my heart. ialso despise Atlas; but i digress, none of these are even the main reason i’m leaving. to be quite frank, i’ve never seen this mission with the gods as important. my dreams, my goals, my redemption; they will always be first. this mission with the gods has just been seen as a side quest for me. partially because i don’t trust the gods myself. if we take everything we’ve heard at face value, then why should i trust God’s that have left the world to ruins before? they don’t even trust us enough to tell us what has happened in the past. in my opinion, they’re either incompetent and lazy or not telling us the actual truth of what we’re doing; or even what they’re doing. they aren’t powerful. if they were, they could retrieve the keys themselves or defeat beshaba’s group themselves. i just can’t bring myself to want to do a mission anymore where i have to obey people who can not trust us enough to let us know basic information. meeting you was a bonus, but i think it’s time for me to move on. this wasn’t a decision i’ve made because Fox left; i’ve been thinking about this for a while. neither my goals or morals align with anyone elses. i want to be good, but i’m only a wench in a perfectly working clock. as of recent events, i also don’t want to explain myself to Atlas of all people, but i can’t bring myself to tell you about myself either. i may return, if only for more information or perhaps even the gala; as much as i do not care for the gods, i’m still interested in the keys and the power within them. if i meet you there, i know it may sound selfish to ask, but i hope you may give me one last dance. roy

a notebook. it’s a bit worn out and has some torn pages.. it was left behind with roy’s stuff and all the letters

‪entry 47‬ ‪[torn out page] ‪entry 53‬ ‪i’ve retrieved a letter from a dream telling me to visit latham and retrieve a key. i’m curious, so i’ll check it eventually. it was definitely odd.‬ ‪entry 55‬ ‪i met a young boy. his name is fox. he’s some sort of shapeshifter. he’s quiet, but his presence is nice company. he also received a similar letter to mine. i have a feeling we’ll be travelling for a while.‬ ‪entry 62‬ ‪we retrieved the key & met some other ppl with letters too. we’re heading to a trinket store back in origin now. i dont wish for them to know of my life so i’ve found a way to steer them as far from possible to finding out about myself. i’ll probably visit ma too.‬ ‪entry 63‬ ‪an elf woman named leera attacked us after i told her i wasnt going to give her this key. i dont like her. she seemed very cocky.‬ ‪entry 65‬ ‪delilah is kind.. i feel like i’m able to trust her. i asked her a question about my goals, vaguely, and it turns out that ayce asked a similar question. based on the message in his later i get the feeling he’s undead.‬ ‪entry 66‬ ‪[torn out.] ‬‪entry 69‬ [‪torn out] ‪entry 72‬ ‪we’re travelling to copper coast now for another key. if it werent for ayce, i wouldnt see any other reason for me to come. fox is still around, but i feel like he's doing his own thing. the other two arent big presences for me to care about.‬ ‪entry 73‬ ‪atlas is a werewolf? i didnt think those were real. this group keeps getting stranger. first a shapeshifter, second an actual living zombie, third a werewolf.‬ ‪ive continued my lie to the rest of them. they all seem to have believed me, strangely enough‬ ‪entry 74‬ ‪copper coast was very pleasant. i wish to come back someday.‬ ‪entry 88‬ ‪this trip to clandesteine has been a disaster.. what the honest fuck‬ just happened ‪entry 90‬ ‪fox told everybody about himself, finally. i feel this huge sense of pride?? i’m very proud of him. i dont understand why i feel so attached to him but i adore him so much‬ ‪entry 92‬ ‪((incoherent scribbles, kinda like “vsdjfsasifwnqkosdkv”)) i think i accidentally implied to ayce that i love him romantically and i think he loves me too... i’m freaking out and i dont know how to react... i think he thinks i’m cool and romantic but i didnt mean to be. ‪entry 93‬ in all honesty, i just wanted to tell him he needs to be more cautious of me. a part of me wishes he could figure it out himself so i dont have to tell him. ‪seriously! i dont know how i did that! i do love and adore him too but i feel like shit.. i dont deserve him, especially considering who i am. on the other hand, i hope he never finds out the truth about me.‬ ‪entry 94‬ ‪oh my god. atlas killed a man and ayce and fox proceeded to tell the guards. i feel sick. i’m currently at home but if they say my name at witness testimony i’m royally fucked. i dont know. i might just run for it and live in myr’s peak. maybe no one will find me.‬ ‪entry 95‬ ‪the group managed to get bailed out using ty’s name. benefits of being friends with rich people?‬ ‪fox found my poster though, so he saved my name during eyewitness testimony. i told him the truth. its been the first time i told someone how i really felt. he wants me to tell ayce but hes the last person i can tell. ‪entry 97‬ ‪we’re in lunarden! it feels nostalgic to be back. i want to go back to every place i miss. i took ayce to that me and nori used to go to back in high school. i think shes currently performing in solardome? i miss her‬ entry 97.2 ‪i came up with a few different ways to complete my goal. i have a few more probing questions, but i will have to ask later. i think i’m getting closer to the answers‬ entry ‪97.3‬ ‪[scribbled out over so that you cant read it] ‪entry 98‬ ‪i’m planning to get completely smashed once we get to solardome. i feel like i deserve it.. ive been pretty stressed and havent got laid. i’m crying remembering that ayce might not even be an option.‬ ‪entry 98.2 ‪i love ayce so much, and its confusing. am i just sexually frustrated? am i just lonely? am i just

sad? i feel guilty because it tears me apart. im confused because i love milo still, too. i know i should tell him the truth, its whats right but i know he’ll hate me. i dont know what to do. (extra note inbetween the pages, torn out but still there: to mom. i love you venhfrhdy mcuh. thank you fir everhything. yes. roy.) entry 98.3 what happens if i succeed? i hope ayce doesnt kill me. entry 100 ‪good morning. ayce & i are officially dating. were in solardome atm; i dont remember much of last night but i remember thinking he‘s beautiful. is it wrong to fall for him?‬ ‪entry 101‬ ‪[torn out] entry 101.2 [torn out] entry 101.3 ‪the blackness on my fingers has risen up more than it has before. its almost hard to write with my hands anymore. [the rest of it is torn out] (torn note inbetween the pages hi ayce. its unrealistic you'll ever find this but there's some things i want to say. back when we first met, i lied to you as a reflex when you asked me why i'm dealing with necromancy. to be honest, i could kind of gather you were undead, but i still lied anyway. my story is personal, its hard for me to be honest. i know i'm an idiot, and i'm sorry i used you. to be truthful, i still am a horrible person and for the entirety of our relationship i've already known that i was using you and i've felt so guilty about that. my feelings are complicated, but i've never lied when i said i loved you, and i still do; but i still want to bring milo back. i made a mistake and i want to fix that. the truth is that i still love him too. i know you deserve better. i'm sorry about lying to you. roy) entry 102 a dragon made us experience our dreams and nightmares. jade's scared of blindness and bugs. a valid fear, in a way. and she was dreaming of doing shows. i think it was supposed to display a feeling of happiness and joy, but it was just spooky since we all experienced her dreams with no sound. i never realized how scary it was to be deaf until i experienced it. atlas' was morbid. people were dying and there was so much gore. then there were people saying they owned him. i knew he was a bad person but it was scary to see all of that again. he dreamt of a workshop with a girl and a young boy. it seemed sweet, with a tinge of nostalgia. i would have never expected him to have dreams. he just seems like a horrible person with no sympathy to me, but i guess he has feelings. i still think he should go to jail, but i feel like he'll just try to kill me if i say anything instead. fox's was sad. we got thrown into a void of empty space where we were surrounded only by dopplegangers and a vaguely humanoid figure. he seemed so lonely and upset. he's scared of being forgotten by us and that made me so sad. i adore him, and he's grown a lot since we first met. i gave him a hug when we went into his dream sequence. i hope he knows i will never forget him. his dream was sweet. he just wants to save people and hang out with us still. i think he'll go far, and i would love to be there for him still when all of this is over. (there are about 2-3 pages with entry 102 that are torn out) entry 103 a new discovery. the world isn't flat? the god's are using their powers to “lock off” the rest of the world. apparently sanctuary is only a small part of the world. that was a really weird discovery to find out? it's kind of hard to believe, but at the same time, not. apparently they keys we've been collecting hold the respective power of the gods, and they're used to “open” the gateway. i have no idea what that means. apparently beshaba wants to use our keys to do exactly that. and also they can kill the god's? entry 112 when we came back to lunarden we discovered that delilah and allen were kidnapped by atlas’ syndicate. i knew atlas was trouble. i hate having to associate with him. we’re going to save them yet it makes me nervous. entry 114 i feel like i almost died in there. we saved the others and no one was hurt though. we’re going to trip back to lunarden and then travel through the travel gates back to origin to try

avoid people. allen mentioned something about strange readings. i have a feeling i know what it is. i’m going to ask lathandar questions. entry 115 nvm we encountered leera. this group genuinely scares me. I’m travelling with people who are down with murder. i should seperate. she uncovered my posters to them and i want to die. she also mentioned the last key at a ball. i need to bounce. lathandar also confirmed my suspicions last night. entry 116 fox left before i could. i feel bad. like maybe it was my fault. i miss him. we have to continue though. entry 117 its so hard to find a bag of holding. i just want to have this spirit stone around without having it in the open. entry 118 we’re in origin now and delilah let me rent out her bag of holding. an absolute kind soul. we bought tickets to the ball. so expensive. i wish i didnt do that. entry 123 [torn out] entry 124 [torn out]

#roy endoza writing #roy endoza #oc #writing

[latina4rmbx]

Tomorrow isn’t Promised

I saw an ad for a game on Facebook.  A clip really.  There were couples staring at each other.  Some crying, some laughing nervously.  All I remember was this one profound question:  "If this were to be our last conversation, what is one thing you’d never want me to forget?”

A seed was born from the question.  I figured, I’d ask people.  At first, I asked the closest people to me, then I expanded the circle.  Needless to say, I freaked a whole bunch of people out.  Before I get to the responses I want you to know that a lot of these are deeply personal, so I will not include names.  Some people who follow me on here, MAY know some of the individuals, but not all. 

I am NOT sick.  I am totally ok.  I found the question so profound, I HAD to ask it.  I have no regrets.

If there was a way to share all of the screen shots, I swear I would but trust me, there were just so many.

Some people responded with just 1 thing.  Some people responded with long beautiful messages.  They are all appreciated and I will forever hold them dear to my heart.

All, but 4 people, received a response to the question from me.  I won’t divulge my responses because as soon as I pressed send, they no longer belonged solely to me.  Just know a good response for most was:  you made me cry.  

I’ll be typing the responses to the question.  Some people gave multiple responses so I may give both.  

I had a conversation with my confidante and she says that this is amazing.  Sort of like a living eulogy. She asked me if I knew these things the people were saying.  I explained to her that in truth, I never really thought about it.  In the end I learned 2 valuable lessons: 

Younger males mainly speak of themselves.

You never really know the profound impact you have had on another persons life.  You’ll see what I mean.

Without further ado, here are the responses, in no particular order:

To value your worth.  To never forget that I love you and the kids.  That you’re a great writer.  A great friend.  A great mother.  I can’t name just one.  Don’t forget to give your friends a blanket.

That I love you & I know I was difficult growing up but I always loved you even when it might’ve felt like I didn’t.  And that I forgive you.

That I greatly appreciate your genuine friendship and you will always hold a special place in my heart.  and that’s the truth.

That I love you

How much I love you

How genuine and good-hearted you’ve always been, no matter what life has thrown at you.  Your situation never changed your heart, in Janee’s words, you’ve stayed golden.

One thing?  That I love you.

That I love you.  Why are you talking like that?

That I am always here for you and that I have and have always had. nothing but love for you.

Sheesh, I don’t know if I interpreted this question correctly but:   If this is our last conversation because you are on your death bed I would say:  In life, it sometimes feels like the world was simply horrible.  Nothing was good and it was full of hate and anger.  Thank you for being someone that gave hope just by being her positive self.  I know that because you were my hope when the world seemed horrible with simple gestures.  May not have changed the world, but it saved me some days.  If it was because we fell off or some other shit:  You was always lit.  Stay golden.  Don’t change for nobody.  I wish you the best.

I’m your child.  No matter how much u deny me !!  and I love you!

I appreciate all the kindness and support you’ve always shown me.

I would want you to know how much I love you and how much you’ve impacted my life in such a positive manner.  How much I love that you’re not just my aunt but you’re like my best friend, and how I feel that you out of most people understand me on a different level.

You prob the funniest chick I know the pleasure of knowing.  There’s your one thing.

Omg don’t say that but I would say you are a beautiful person inside and out and the world is a better place because you are in it.  You have a beautiful family and friends that love you.

Id never want you to forget how much I GENUINELY appreciate our conversation.  How you were there for me and gave me so much words of wisdom when I was going thru the worst time of my life.  How you satisfied my craving of violets when I was pregnant with Mychael..and how much you make me laugh thru social media because you are so funny!

That you really will be missed and that I wish our friendship happened sooner so I’ll have more time with you!!!  You are greatly appreciated.

I love you with all of my heart.  You’re an inspiration to me.  Words could not describe what you are to me.  More than a cousin, more than a sister.  Awilda Lee was the brightest thing in our lives when she came along. Thank. you for her.  Thank you for having unconditional love for me that my Wela had.  I have very fond memories at 533.  You’re in almost all of them.  From music out the window to your word processor and all your CD’s. My love of music comes from you.

That I love you like MY blood sister!

Us when we was living with grandma on 139th street, while you play Richard Marx “i’ll be Right Here Waiting for You.”  Til this day when I hear that song I see you playing it. I love you.

That Jesus loves you so much He gave His life for you in order to offer you forgiveness for all the wrong you’ve done & a way for you to live with Him eternally in His presence & that its. never to late to give him a change because He’s always by you waiting.

That you are very loved.  Good morning honey.

Jesus loves you!

If this were my last conversation with you I would want you to never forget that you are an amazing person from the first time I met you as Dr. D secretary til now, the only thing that has changed is your hair color and your age lol.  I genuinely have love for you.  Your free spirit and outspokenness is always welcome in my world.  I know you said one thing but I had more than one thing lol.  Oh and you’re a bomb writer.  So when you publishing your 1st book?

That you were an amazing friend that honestly left an imprint in my life.

What an awesome job. you’ve done with Joaquin!!

Morning lol your smart mouth and trouble shooting skills.

I wouldn’t want you to forget how absolutely amazing I think you are.  You were there for me when I needed you most.  Helping me with my son and a shoulder to cry on.  For that, I will be forever grateful.

Fine.  I’d want you to never forget that not only do we have the same teeth, that we’re cousins on both sides of our family and that you’re first daughter looked exactly like me when she was younger.  And that although we don’t speak much, I love you more than anything.

My gap

That I love and you’re my favorite person in life and I am grateful that God put us together and I hope we together in the next life too.

How hard we laughed together.

How I never judged anyone.  Good morning. (I think they mean how u, meaning me, never judged anyone)

How much I love you.

How much I love and appreciated you.  

How valuable I feel our friendship is and how much your wisdom and guidance has helped me in very difficult times.  I appreciate and love you very much.

That I love you

That although growing up we were not close.  I still have a great deal of love for you and I absolutely enjoy every single lil time we share together.  and our sex talk at times (they meant we talk about it, not that we talk it to each other)

That I love you.  That you are special strong funny.

That you are love

That I love you unconditionally because you are extremely unique.

That you have a warm and tender heart and a fierce outer shell.  You are an incredibly strong and smart woman.

That you are an absolutely amazing human being & that you deserve all the happiness and love that this world has to offer.  Never stop smiling.

That I love you and everything about you.

You will forever be my favorite bookworm.  You’ve written your own book in my life.  “That loyal friend” by OV.  You speak my love language you always have and I am just as honored to have you in my corner.  I love you. my dear friend.  Sincerely, KR.

Everyday of my. younger life, all I wanted to do was find you guys!  Once I did, I felt I was becoming complete!  Meeting you guys when you y’all came to Cali was EVERYTHING I could have asked for and more!  You guys are ones I work for EVERYDAY!  Once I make this generational wealth, I got y’all!  I promise you that!

I know it’ll sound cliche but I don’t thin you will ever truly know and understand how truly and deeply I care and love you.  You helped pull me out of really dark place, you are an amazing soul.  You are one of the rare ppl that i actually think of when i think of love and friendship and i thank you for being a part of my life.

That you’re my Binobo (a species of monkey - look it up)

When I would nag you on the 1st of the month.

That you should never forget how much you are loved.  That your generosity of spirit and goodness far surpasses any flaws.  That you are sooooo much more worthy, than you think you are.  That I would never want you to settle for anyone who isn’t a really good person to you and the kids.  Most importantly, I would pass on something that my Great Aunt once told me to always remember...If it doesn’t bring you peace, then it isn’t from God.  In my experience, those words have always proven true.  You know in your heart and it your gut - there is a very definitive, distinct sense of peace, when things are right.  God only wants that sense of calm and joy, and He gave us the instinct to recognize the difference. (AMEN!)

I truly don’t like the tone of this question.  But it would be your honesty.  You’ve always been so open and honest about your story and it was a breath of fresh air for me.

Your humor and smile is always up lifting.

Awwwww.  You are my counselor.  You always have the best advice you are the sassiest glamma I know and the queen of essential oils lol.  you add a special something to the world that only you can.  A tell it like it is type of chick, who always keeps it 100%.  It’s been such a pleasure having you in my world.

If it’s a thought about you, it wold be that I thought were smarter, funnier and at least a little better looking than the average bear.  If it’s a memory, besides the short jokes and dancing, I would want you to remember, well it’s a toss up.  Remember the time I lied about cooking food I brought in lunch, that it was really Lydia who made it, and she busted me.

I’d say thank you for being the parents that you are and thank you for allowing me to influence your little treasure and for keeping in contact with me.

Don’t forget to put me in your will.  Lol just playing.  That I love you of course.

How much I love you and thank you for always being neutral even if you’re his coworker lol.

I’d want you to know...While there is a great physical distance between us, I feel close to you.  I love that you had a special relationship with my mom and hope that we can have our own.  Big hugs to you.

1.  That I love you.  2.  that I would like you to raise my kids if anything happened to me or my wife.

That my heart was pure whether they were good or bad to me.  To be honest I just want people to know that I’ve always been a good soul and did my best to be there for those who needed me, just a selfless individual.

You’re the best grandma Saniyah will have from marriage you love her like she’s really your daughters child and I love it.  wouldn’t want it any other way.

Nuestra amistad (TRANSLATION: our friendship)

I love you

Never forget that I love you and God is good.

I don’t want it to be our last conversation but one thing that i don’t want you to forget is that you called me Thunderbuddy.

That I love you.  That you’re an amazing person!  Wait that’s two things right?  LOL

Never forget who got you high.

1.  Don’t forget to brush your teeth (stephen’s voice) 2>. Don’t forget to keep being unapologetically yourself.

How cute and funny I am lol

I wouldn’t want you to forget the laughs we’ve shared.  Our birthday body suits.

Thank you for reading,

XOXO

[chaekkung]

o wormie? u? in a lot of love? perfect i don't think i've asked u yet but (if ur free) could u talk about why/how you started loving changkyun/hyungwon (or both :-D) ?? pls ramble as much as u like!! read more exists 4 a reason and . i love reading ppl b soft and in love it's cute!!!!! i love u have a good night/day ! 💛💛

o holy shit thats a lot ok im gonna write about changkyun since i Havent... :( and ill copy pasta one of my hyungwon essays for u to read!!!! the changkyun will be under it :^) this is gonna be Super Long im sorrie in advance LMAO BUT HAVE A GREAT DAY/NIGHT TOO!!!! :D (also theres prob gonna be a lot of typos bc im Dumb but.. bear w/ me)

mister chae:

honestly i don’t even know where to start?? uhh i guess with his looks first since,, this is describing or smthing,, anyways yeah hyungwon is just… fucking beautiful. he has the most handsome and visually attractive face ive ever seen in my whole life??? and i’ve stanned a lot of groups in my past before but hyungwon is honestly one of the best looking man i know :( im not even being biased,,, anyways yeah there’s that. and he’s like naturally a model, i mean he can legit wear anything and do anything and he’ll look like he’s posing for a high end magazine, not surprised if he’s been modeling since he was like, born. also he has the most beautiful and endearing smile and laugh…. when he smiles he really goes from :o -> :D like!! please!! you are too fucking cute,,, :((( he really lights up the entire room solely w his smile im jusT?? wow?? like when his smile lines by the sides of his nose down to the corner of his mouth come out i just,,,, really… need 2 calm my heart. he has like the closed mouth wide smile, and the straight up whole face smile!! and i.. love both.. so much,,, and yeah anyways his lips are like the first thing people notice about him and big mood?? they’re so plump and … kissable.. and soft.. but my favorite feature on him are his eyes tbh…. idk he has really beautiful eyes? idk how to describe it but like, they’re so…. kind? and bright.. it’s just i want to look into them all day long and im just… so in love with his eyes. like,, they really hold all the stars in my universe wtf!!!  :( OH AND I DONT TALK ABOUT THIS ENOUGH BUT…. HIS EARS ARE SO FUCKING ADORABLE WTF I WANT A MOLD OF HIS EARS ON MY DESK,,, idk about others but i personally find his right ear cute as fuck?? like the extra folds in his ears.. i would d*e for them………. godksj why is everything about him so cute i just?? want to kno …

ok now im going to talk about him!!! so his personality, is what i really fell in love with,, (god this all sounds so.. cliche. but it’s.. true, also unrelated but every time someone talked about,, love cliches and shit i was always like ‘sounds fake’ but???? after hyungwon i really?? believe in all of that..) if i had to use one word to describe him it would just be ‘kind’… like he!!! is!!! the king of being considerate and compassionate and wonderful and he’s just a really good person.. :( he’s the one you can always count on and lean on. he’d always be on your side and makes you feel safe and comforted,, like he’s really full of love??? even the members said he’s a really good listener and they chose as him as someone they go to when they’re feeling down because he makes them feel better about the situation (god, i wish they were me,,) and he has the most beautiful heart… like, he’s been wearing the Sewol bracelet since as long as we’ve known and he has never missed a day. you can always see it during fansigns, vlives, whenever he’s out, and he even wore it when he was modeling under his clothes… :(( he went from the charm, to the rope bracelet thing, to the clip on and now he’s wearing the wristband!! :(((((( he says he will always wear it to remember the incident, and he has been for over two years… he’s doing it out of the kindness of his heart and not to show anyone… he said he felt so helpless during the time, and watching every thing unfold before him, and has worn the yellow bracelet which symbolizes ‘hope’ :((((((((( god,, real emo hours,,, i love my angel so much wtf !!! ok next,, (sjdhaj at this point im going to write a whole novel wtf but im gonna,, stop soon i swear .) hyungwon is really fucking hardworking and ?? he’s so dedicated to his career and making sure that we, his fans, are always satisfied and proud to stan him.. like he’s constantly saying he will work hard to show us something better next time, that he’s not going to stop trying to improve himself. every single stage he puts his all into it, but he pushes himself even more to show us a even better one. he’s always worried and thinking about his career as an actor and a singer. he wants to promote the group in any way that he can, whether it’s through modeling or acting :(( what a King… he’s… really always striving to do the Best and he won’t ever settle or be content with it because he’s just naturally an ambitious and super hard working person… like. he’s so dedicated to what he does, no matter what it is. uhh one more thing he’s actually a really sentimental guy!! not like in a bad way, but in the best possible way. he’s really sweet, and gentle.. (he would be the Best Boyfriend,,, im just saying..) he’s the type to give handwritten letters… and surprise gifts.. (he said so!!) he said he cant cook but he want to cook for his gf he will try his best and it will be full of love… god.. i wish that were me. he’s the type to keep quiet… but take silently notes on what someone likes/dislikes, and will reveal it unexpectedly with a gift or when he says something and it will! make the other person! so happy! :((( he doesn’t put his emotions Out There, he’s not rlly good at it,, but he honestly has so much love in him,,, he tries his best to show it ok!! it’s,, good effort it’s so cute when he does… ah.. pls.,,, he’s always like ah, i don’t know if i can properly show my appreciation and sincerity for you guys, but i hope you guys know how thankful i am for you. LASDHFJAK GOFD,S,,,, IM FUCKIGN EMO THINKGIN ABOTU IT AGAIN… HE HAS A HEART OF GOLD AND HE’S SUCH A SWEETHEART I JUST WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD SEE IT.. :(( HE DESERVES ALL THE LOVE IN THIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE AND I REALLY HOPE ALL MY LOVE FOR HIM CAN COUNT AS SOMETHING FOR IT ALL.. UGHFJASHJSAALSJF yeah ok let me,,, stop… sorry to everyone who has to scroll past this LMAo,, :(

ok i was gonna stop but i forgot to mention how he’s so fucking talented!! i mean this boy does it ALL. the whole package or w/e. god,, i love my whole ass talented man wtf! he sings, dances, choreographs, models, acts, DJs, is multilingual, and a world class poet,, cmon. ANYWAYS he excels in all those areas nd,, no argument there.. his voice is angelic as fuck ,, just like his personality.. and his dancing.. god,,, like . his dancing his so on point, his every move,, and it’s so.. fluid.. and natural. and it’s harder for tall people to dance esp ones w like long ass limbs (hyungwon.,,) but he still looks fucking amazing and pulls everything off so perfectly????? gofdj,,, can he like . Stop being so…. perfect.. and lovable… :((( he just puts so much passion into everything he does!!! and his heart is pure Gold ,, i just.. love him,,,,,,, everything about him …. ok lmao let me stop !!! if u actually read all this wtf,, im sorry nd i’d die for u

mister changkyun:

okay wtf icb i havent talked about changkyun that much on my blog.... anyways this is gonna be a mess and unorganized bc im Dumb but here goes,,, ok we can start from the beginning kinda,, so originally wonho was my #2 bias and then mh i think like i love changkyun but i wasnt like IN LOVE you kno?? honestly i started to notice him more firstable bc he and hyungwon are so frigging cute together?? i just couldnt ignore it and next thing u know im IN Love w my lil koala :(((( hes sO CUTE ..... LIKE.. IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT I REALLY JUST WANNA BE AROUND HIM ALL THE TIME!! his sense of humor and his personality in general is so?? positive?? and fun??!!! like i would spend every second of the rest of my life w him... and he’s so cheesy as we all know ,, and i find it so cute but also he makes me so stressed bc he’s so mushy aijsdgfhdjs but he rlly Love us wtf.. and hes so funnie... he makes me smile and laugh all the time :( and he genuinely Loves every single one of his fans so much... he’s so sweet with them and he makes them feel so loved and special, and like they’re the only person in the world at that moment :(((( this boy gives so much love and i only want to give him a million times more back... 

HIS LAUGH.. OK.. HIS LAUGH!!!!!! MAKES MY HEART MELT LIKE LAVA WTF SJDFUDJS HES SOSOSOSOOS CUTE WHEN HE LUAHGS HE LIKE.. PUTS HIS ALL INTO IT.. IT SLIKE HAHAHAHA FR... PLS,,, ESP WHEN HE GOES CRAZY AND ALSO STARTS CLAPPING,... LMAO MOOD.. HE SOS CUTIEJUJIiajsdfudj and WHEN HE SMILES THE CLOSED-MOUTH-WIDE-SMILE AND HIS CUTE ASS DIMPLES COME OUT.... HOTLT FUCKIDUFD THERE GOES MY SOUL AND GALLONS OF HEART NUT... ITS THE CUTEST SIGHT IN THE WORLD AHHH HIS DIMPLE ARE ADORABLE AND HIS CHEEKS!! I WANT TO SQUISH!!! i wanna . reside in his dimples. build a home there and alll....... omg.. :’(( every time he takes a selfie or smthing i rlly Lose it. every single selfie is his Best selfie. wtf.... king of angles fr... AND KING OF FOOT SELFIES TOOOSJFDK LLISTEN AGAIN HES SOSOOSOSO HANDSOME AND GOOD LOOKING OKAY!!! HES REALLY A VISUAL?? IDK HOW PEOPLE CANT SEE IT BUT LIEK THIS BOY IS F  I  N E ..... HIS FACE IS SO BEAUTIFUL AHHHhhhHHHHH  AND HE NEVER HAD A BAD ERA.. HE WAS HOT SINCE NO MERCY WTF !!!!! UGJFSUJDJS I HOPE HE KNOWS HES FUCKING BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!! :( ANF HIS BEAUTIFUL NOSE,, AND HIS EYES!!!! OGM!!,,, GOD AND HIS PERFECTLY SHAPED LIPS.... HSI JAWLINE,,, BITUCSHJ,,,

OK HES SO LOVABLE IN EVERY DAMN WAY LIKE,, he’s Weird but its a cute Weird he’s so special omg there’s really no one else like him :(((( like...... he’s a treasure fr... he’s So Many things and once its hard to pinpoint his personality but like ??? i love it so much?? he’s a mystery and i dont know what he’s thinking like most of the time but.. i rlly love him omgdsj he’s so special :’( like fr !!! everyone LOVES him!! :(( most people wouldnt see him as the maknae if they dont Know,, but like he really is... and he’s really mx’s babie :-( they spoil him so much and love the heck out of him,,, he’s really the most loved maknae out there wtf... honestly... i love family... they really Adore him so much ugh what a big ass fking MOOD! :((

AND HIS VOICE!!!!! THE VOICE OF THE HEAVENS AND ANGELS AND HAPPINESS AND ALSO NUT!!!! WTF!! HIS VOICE IS SO SEXY AJSDFGDUJIS LIKE... PLEASE... NARRATE THE BIBLE TO ME HOLY FUCKSIFDU, YOU KNOW HIS VOICE ONLY V LIVE... HOLY SHIT MY EARS NUTTED SO HARD omg.... i just wanna listen to his voice All Day.... and dont even get mee started on his rapping .... he starts his bar and sets me on fucking fire w half a syllable . and did i mentioned he fucking amazing at rapping yeah . he Does That. and hes so charismatic, especially on stage... :((( ugh omgfisjd i wanan d*e when hes being so h*t on screen fucksdf,,, and like . his mixtapes he’s working on... king... pleas.e.... End me. just end me with ur talented ass wtf... 

SIJDFJD I NEED TO SHUT UP BUT LISTEN IM SO PROUD OF HOW MUCH HE’S GROWN IN THE PAST 2+ YEARS... LIKE HE’S COME SO FUCKING FAR!!!!! IN SO MANY WAYS!!!!!!!! GOD,,,,, I LOVE HIM SOSOSOSOSO DAMN MUCHSJIDFUDS HE MAKES MY HEART CONTINUE BEATING... THATS REALLY MY BABIE !! MY FUCKING CINNAMON APPLE!!! :(((((((((((

ok let me stop thank u,,, also... if anyone actually made it here hi wow uh ur great ily wtf :--(

#replies #im SO SORRY TO EVERYONE WHO GOES ON MY BLOG ON MOBILE #DIJFDJS.KFDHJS... #THERES NO READ MORE ON THE MOBILE BLOG LMAO RIP #i tried to keep it short but yeah #omg #fuckashdj I LOVE MY BOYSDHFD BTIR!!! :(((

[comicteaparty]

October 5th, 2017 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on October 5th, 2017, from 5PM - 7PM PDT.  The chat focused on Galebound by Respheal.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

Good day everyone~! This week’s Comic Tea Party is now officially beginning. Today we are discussing Galebound by Respheal~! (http://www.galebound.com/) For those new to CTP, discussions about the comic are freeform, so please feel free to bring up whatever you wish. However, every 30 minutes I will be dropping in a discussion question to help those who would like a prompt. These questions are totally OPTIONAL to answer so pay them no mind if you wish~! Remember, constructive criticism is allowed, but the primary focus here is to have fun and appreciate the amazing comics that the community makes~! Each chat a top comment will be picked and featured on an ad for this chat, so let’s have a great discussion~!

With that said, let us begin with this first question~!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

Kabocha

Oooh, favorite scene so far. Hrrrrrm.

Lyall

I really like din parting the waters

making the bridge

Amarok

oh these are questions for us?

Respheal

Yeh

Amarok

easy, the scene where Din jumps out the bed and charges his laser

Respheal

To prompt discussion

Lyall

i liked the fight in the hotel room too

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I'm definitely laughing at this.

no escape bruh

Kabocha

I really like Page 54 -- the end of the Dark Hour. http://www.galebound.com/comics/2415667/054/ I sat there for a while and was like... "What is this?" "Why is he smiling?" I've been really torn between Pascal thinking "You're so dead" and actually being relieved -- because who knows what could have happened? I've kinda stuck to the idea that Pascal REALLY wants to see killing Conan through though.(edited)

Amarok

well theres always Parkers house hears Conan choking in background

Lyall

Res' two page spreads are gorgeous btw

RebelVampire

not really a scene but one of my fave pages is definitely that one where pascal is looking out at the ocean realizing wtf just happened

Kabocha

yes.

I laughed super hard at that one

Respheal

Hahahah so many people said they relate to Pascal on that page xD

Amarok

yeah but few know about his fish friend

Respheal

"I sincerely love this page, my inner self relates to Pascal on a higher level"

Lyall

loooooooool

Kabocha

If it's not in comic, it's not confirmed, Amarok

Lyall

i feel that i personally have not bonded with pascal for some reason

perhaps my heart too sold on din

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I like this scene too. So glowy

Kabocha

We know very little about Pascal tbh. Din's been very quiet about him except "dude is gonna try to kill you."

Lyall

hurrrrhurrrrhurrrr

Kabocha

:3

Amarok

yes my favorite page

Lyall

love that spread

Kabocha

Wait, wait

Respheal

I was itching to get to that page so bad xD

Kabocha

How many words has Pascal said in comic so far?

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

uhhh

did he?

Respheal

Three

Kabocha

and what % of them has been a profanity

Amarok

2

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

oh

Respheal

2/3 were curses

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yeah

Amarok

that third one wasnt a word

Lyall

loooooool

Amarok

it was garble

Respheal

Yeah it was just "ugh...."

Kabocha

............. New name added to the nickname. I'mma stick it in the middle: "Foulmouth"

Respheal

xDDDD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

creative censorship, my friend

Lyall

PottyMouthPascal

RebelVampire

hey pascal was told to kill, not talk no talking needed

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

fartmouth Pascal

oops this is gonna be archived lel

Respheal

LOL

Kabocha

How many bad words DOES Pascal know, and are you going to invent new swears for him to use?

Respheal

Well I mean

He hangs out in bars so

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

so he swears like a sailor

Kabocha

When he finally does get more than a one-word line, he's probably just gonna be like "You ------ --------- -------- you and your ----------- horse"

Lyall

omg XD

i hope so

Respheal

--and the horse you rode in on

RebelVampire

the way this is worded makes me think pascal is gonna invent his own swears. gonna wind up using Din's name in one of them.

Kabocha

And then he whips out a knife and whoops, he really does have Murderpants now

Din will be so blown away

Respheal

.........

Wind puns

so many gale-blasted wind puns

Kabocha

has been kicked from the chat

lololol

Lyall

naaaaaah

Respheal

.....can...can I answer the questions too? xDDD

RebelVampire

if ppl got kicked for puns math would not be welcome here

rip math

Kabocha

Yes

Respheal

lololol

RebelVampire

you can answer the questions yes

Respheal

YAS

Lyall

math the punniest

Kabocha

WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE SCENE RES

RebelVampire

i wont stop you

Respheal

THE SNAKE CHARMERS MONOLOGUE

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

kinda found it funny how they argued over a change of clothes

Respheal

That scene stayed pretty much the same in every draft

This page: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2437904/061/

Kabocha

Conan objects to being called a hick

Respheal

Nah he owns it xD

Amarok

ah the first attempt to explain magic

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

Lyall

OOoooooh i liked that scene too

RebelVampire

i liked din was nice in that scene and stopped magicking when he saw conan was sad

Kabocha

I'm not sure I trust this face sometimes

Lyall

no, trust that face most of all

RebelVampire

whats not to trust

O_O

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Respheal

Hmmm....

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

what he's friendly

RebelVampire

thats the face of honesty

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

or maybe not

Respheal

Oh I mean re: "i liked din was nice in that scene and stopped magicking when he saw conan was sad"(edited)

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Artemis trust him so it's good enough

Lyall

didn't he stop cause conan commanded it tho, lol

suuure he's just so nice tho

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yeah that's what I thought too

Kabocha

I feel like Conan was creeped out tbh

RebelVampire

shhh let me think din is nice O_O

Lyall

din is nice in my heart

keltyzoid!

so what is this tea party

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

din is nice I think

Kabocha

Din is nice to Conan.

Lyall

i don't feel like din is evil at least

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

so uh we discuss a comic every week

Kabocha

Din wants to overthrow a kingdom, though.

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

@keltyzoid!

Kabocha

Sooooooooooooo not really all that nice?

Lyall

i wouldn't say i think he's good tho either

i feel like he's someone's pawn

Kabocha

Din is nice in a very limited context

Lyall

cause din very much has an agenda

mariah (rainy day dreams)

He's got too much big shit to do to be soft and fluffy

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

he's nice

Kabocha

But sometimes you gotta feel like he's blowing smoke up someone's butt

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I'd like to believe

Lyall

wondered if he was conan's dad's servant or something

Respheal

@keltyzoid! https://comicteaparty.tumblr.com/about

Lyall

and he's bound to their family that's why he has to take orders from them

keltyzoid!

THANKS RES

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

like a book club only with comics

RebelVampire

to be fair to din's not so niceness moments, he did just meet conan and is fulfilling some obligation. those are not factors where someone is going to be nice.

mariah (rainy day dreams)

Hmmmmmmm I like that theory!

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

why does Din want to overthrow a kingdom tho?

Lyall

so in that regard din is neither nice or not nice, he's just doing his obligatory duty

RebelVampire

@keltyzoid! https://comicteaparty.tumblr.com/faq you can also check out the faq which has more info ;3;

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

is the king that bad?

I mean kinda if he sents pascal to kill conan

keltyzoid!

ty ty

RebelVampire

well it may not be that the king is bad even. its hard to say when we havent seen the king.

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

@keltyzoid! you can read and catch up http://galebound.com/

it's a short read(edited)

keltyzoid!

Din and Pascal are some hard boys to draw, so shout outs to Res for drawing them over and over again

Respheal

Thanks! :'D

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I like Din's floofy hair

keltyzoid!

GOD YOUR ART HAS GOTTEN SO GOOOODD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

so floofy

Respheal

THANK YOU

That means a lot ;w;

RebelVampire

din has the best hair ;3;

Lyall

love din's floofy hair too

Respheal

Very floof

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yeah

keltyzoid!

curly boy

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

all the floof

Lyall

they say curly haired boys are pervs tho

keltyzoid!

who says that

Lyall

people

Respheal

pffft

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies Lyall is not curly haiir tho

Kabocha

How would Din feel about being called a floofy guy though lol

Lyall

lyall you need a perm

Kabocha

having someone sit there and ruffle his hair

admittedly, I thought, at first, that the line by his eye was just an age line XD

Lyall

strange imagery of conan ruffling din's hair

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

he'll shoot lasers at everyone

LOL

Respheal

@Lyall and that's how Conan dies

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

well conan can do that

Lyall

LOL

but what if he does it and commands don't kill me before hand

Kabocha

Conan's gonna end up shoved in the sea or something

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

what he can command Din to be a nice doggy and let Conan pet him

Mahotou

i'm late but i'm here!

Respheal

Well that might help xD

Maho! o/

Mahotou

o/!

RebelVampire

welcome!

welcome all new ppl

Mahotou

is it ok to ask for a summary of what's transpired so far at the tea party?

RebelVampire

i think the bigger question is is din's hair naturally that floof or does he spend hours getting it to floof O_O

keltyzoid!

pet DIn's hair but be careful not to dislodge the 8 to 10 random items he has hidden in there at all times

Lyall

secret dagger stash

keltyzoid!

he doesn't know what's in there right now but he knows it would be a pity to lose them

Respheal

LOL

Lyall

it's more like wild untammed floof

Mahotou

Din's hair is a portal

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I'd like to think it's natural floof

Respheal

@Mahotou The question is favorite scenes, but it devolved into discussing the floofiness of Din's hair

Lyall

rather than picture din with curlers in at night

RebelVampire

@Mahotou weve talked about fave scenes and aboout pascal's swearing

keltyzoid!

his floof is powered by the universe itself

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I mean can he summon hair sprays?(edited)

Respheal

Oh yes and that 66.7% of Pascal's dialogue thus far has been cursing(edited)

Mahotou

XD

keltyzoid!

curse him and his poofy shirt

Mahotou

pasc cant catch a break

Lyall

oh i love din's jacket too

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

Mahotou

speaking of, a fav scene is pasc's smiling

keltyzoid!

belts

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I like the scarf

Lyall

best jacket

Respheal

:D

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

likes all the scarf

Lyall

din the best dressed man

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yis

powerful and fashionable

Lyall

probably someone's tool

keltyzoid!

but Pascal is so fancy

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

fancy murderpants

Lyall

pascal is a snappy dresser too

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

both of them are

Respheal

Magicians, they like to dress well

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

that red scarf is cool

Lyall

they must work for rich people

who care how they dress

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yeah

keltyzoid!

or maybe he just knows of a really good antique store

Amarok

im back

what i miss

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

and Din forced Conan to dress up too

Respheal

o/

RebelVampire

or they just like to look really cool while they performing their magic. how else you gonna impress da ladies

Amarok

oooh we talking dress up

Lyall

maybe it increases your magic powers to dress nice

the secret of fashion magic

Respheal

Sure let's go with that

Kabocha

Din dropped that giant bag of cash at first

Amarok

oh thats the one thing that tells us that "Lucie" isnt Lucie

Kabocha

so I mean

keltyzoid!

the fancier you are the more magic you can do

Kabocha

dude's got access

Amarok

she hasnt complimented on his new outfit

Respheal

She's a lil busy freaking out over his well-being

keltyzoid!

one time i saw a guy on Penn and Teller and he was dressed like a homeless man and his magic was sub par

Respheal

LOL

keltyzoid!

whAT

Amarok

uh huh sure

Lyall

is she really her

i feel like it's a mirage to manipulate conan

Amarok

ill take shes a fake for 800 bob

keltyzoid!

it's a mirage to sink ships >:/

Lyall

yeah

Kabocha

What is Pascal in a glamor?

Lyall

like i find it more believable that she's fake than real just randomly there

Amarok

unless Pascal got his fish freind for a ride

Kabocha

(sorry, going with the jeopardy style answer lol)

Amarok

hes still trudging the shore

Respheal

Oh xD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

XD

RebelVampire

pascal busy building sand castles

keltyzoid!

hell yeah

Respheal

LOL he would too

Lyall

fffffft

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

does he like sand castles?

he might murder the sand castle

Lyall

who doesn't like sand castles

Kabocha

No, no, he'd only stab people who crushed his castle

Pascal has principles.

Lyall

he'd curse and cry

keltyzoid!

Conan's gonna break his sandcastle like the bully in Cool Cat Saves the Kids

RebelVampire

is that why pascal out to murder conan and his dad O_O conan's dad crushed pascal and the king's sand castle?

Respheal

......Sure

Lyall

nah pascal is being controlled by someone else too

Respheal

xD

Kabocha

Cool Din Saves the Kids

Lyall

feel like pascal and din are just both being used

RebelVampire

oh theyre for sure just being used

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

awww

poor pascal

Lyall

really din and pascal are BFFs that grew up together and dated

RebelVampire

i mean the opening kind of set the tone for that XD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

omg

def ship

Lyall

then they're like well it's a job

sorry bae

Kabocha

OMG ;'D

keltyzoid!

Din and Pascal?

Lyall

yus

Kabocha

Din has a boyfriend that is not Pascal, I'm pretty sure

Lyall

I hope

he's super good looking

Kabocha

I think Din's type is blonde? :3

Mahotou

that's a truth

Kabocha

Where's that pic, Res?!

Respheal

wuh?

Oh

Of Din's BF?

keltyzoid!

yeah it's Conan shut up

Mahotou

they want the boyfriend Res

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

Mahotou

xD

Kabocha

omg

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Conan can just be a chaperone

Lyall

i don't wanna push spoilers out of res tho

Respheal

https://respheal.tumblr.com/post/161779575831/drew-a-thing-for-fun-i-have-no-idea-why-theyre

Mahotou

OH WAIT

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

huh

Mahotou

THERE IT IS

Lyall

awww he's not my type

but if he makes you happy din i support

Mahotou

he's for Din anyways lol

RebelVampire

QUESTION 2. In the most recent updates, it’s revealed that Din may have purposely let the assassin, Pascal, get away. It also opens up an important question: can Din be trusted? Why would Din let Pascal get away if that’s true? Why is Din so secretive instead of just telling Conan the truth? Is Din really just out to hurt Conan too?

Mahotou

xD

Respheal

Oh hoh hohohohoh

Kabocha

Din did say the less Conan knows, teh better.

Lyall

surprisingly doesn't like long hair on male characters that much

RebelVampire

thats what all secretive ppl say when they just want someone to shut up

keltyzoid!

maybe it was just a prank

Kabocha

I feel like Din doesn't want blood on his hands? Or at least on Conan's hands, to be honest.

Amarok

well Din doesnt really know Conan

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

He's concerned for Pascal in a way

Amarok

but he knows Felix

allegedly

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

who's felix?

Lyall

maybe din has been ordered not to tell conan things

Amarok

Conans father

RebelVampire

felix is conan's dad

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

oh carp I forgot

Kabocha

He knows Conan enough to know that he was some guy in a stable who had a life and was going to help with an assassination plot

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

see my memory fails me already

Mahotou

*patpat

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

XD

Lyall

it's okay mharz i forgot too

Amarok

But the question and answer is Does Din trust Conan

Kabocha

So, Conan's plausible deniability in this is key if Conan's not gonna get the axe.

Amarok

enough to allow himself to be potentially controlled by him against his will

Lyall

i doubt din trusts conan

i mean he just met him

conan is more like luggage to din probably

Kabocha

tbh I think there's some serious gaslighting going on right now though

Mahotou

same

Kabocha

Stuff's going to explode as soon as Checker-- erm, Artemis manages to get Din to wake up.

RebelVampire

i dont think he's been ordered to not say anything. honestly i get the sense din is just being nice in this regard and feels the less conan knows the less conan's life is disrupted and the quicker they can get stuff done

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Somehow I just feel like it's his duty to protect Conan

Lyall

same

RebelVampire

i agree it seems he might be bound to conan's family

Lyall

i don't feel like their relationship is that deep atm

cause din is doing a duty

and conan is basically the cargo

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yeah

RebelVampire

hahaha conan as cargo

Superjustin of Time and Space

Lol

Respheal

Early on, he was even thrown over Artemis like luggage

Lyall

yuuuuus

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yep definitely luggage

Superjustin of Time and Space

(and yeah just peeking in to see what's up)

Respheal

o/

Superjustin of Time and Space

\o

Lyall

hi super~!!

Superjustin of Time and Space

Keep up the good work Respheal, your stuff's awesome

Respheal

Thanks :'D

Superjustin of Time and Space

and hey Draco!

You're welcome~

Respheal

PFFFFFFFFFFT

Lyall

loooool

Respheal

-dies-

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

Amarok

as for the why would Din let Conan escape

Superjustin of Time and Space

OMG that pic

Amarok

obviously commands are verbal

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Din let Conan escape?

Respheal

Why Din would let Pascal escape you mean?

Amarok

Pascal yes

derp

Respheal

LOL

Lyall

ah that makes more sense

Respheal

Maho xD

Lyall

my memory is fuzzy but i was like when did conan escape

Amarok

anyway

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

if Din let Conan escape, the story is over

Lyall

you had one job Din

Amarok

COmmand are verbal so to override them u must have percise language or else a technical loophole could proceed

Kabocha

now I want to draw some stuff like galebound was a totally different comic

Superjustin of Time and Space

Alternate Ending

RebelVampire

well its not over weve established din knows where conan is O_O

Tenor

@Respheal I didn't get to read but i wanted to drop in and saw I love the art at least! <33 KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK

say*

Respheal

Thanks <3(edited)

Amarok

as Din may not know the wording of the contract, he must improvise

Lyall

i hope din has this huge secret ulterior motive that really goes against everything that's been said and done so far and he was playing both sides in order to free himself or something, lol

cause he seems that type

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I hope you don't go too far. I've only read the main pages

RebelVampire

i assume din just has past history with pascal

since i mean

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I feel that too

RebelVampire

din knew who he was

wasnt like "oh rando assassin"

unless theres a magician association

Respheal

omg

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

and not just I just know he's an assassin

there's a connection

Superjustin of Time and Space

I love these images @Kabocha

mariah (rainy day dreams)

They went to baby murder magic school together

Lyall

looool

Kabocha

You know, in Ink Drop Cafe, I've been talking about how Pascal is secretly out to kill Conan, because Conan's clearly the evil little brother

Lyall

they do look a like

i have a hard time telling them apart tbh

Respheal

rip

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LMAO

Superjustin of Time and Space

Wait

there's sucha thing

Respheal

I gotta admit that's more me sucking at drawing :'D I WILL GET BETTER(edited)

Superjustin of Time and Space

as babby murder time hour?

Lyall

i think that's why i haven't bonded with pascal, he reminds me of conan mostly

but like better dressed

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

you did improve a lot Res

Respheal

Thanks <3(edited)

Superjustin of Time and Space

Indeed

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

:3

Mahotou

same face syndrome is a butt

Respheal

Pascal needs to show up moar so I can get more practice drawing him xD

Lyall

hahah oh dear

Superjustin of Time and Space

XD(edited)

Lyall

i was thinking they were secret twins or something

RebelVampire

while were on these subjects. let us theorize

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2289959/001/

who that other kid in that page

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Lucie?(edited)

Respheal

pbbt

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

A childhood friend?

Lyall

maybe one of them is din as a kid(edited)

cause of the black hair

Mahotou

OMG YES WHAT DO OTHERS THINK ABOUT DA OTHER KID?

Kabocha

my initial thought was it's conan

Lyall

same

i thought it was conan the first time but the hair looks black

RebelVampire

what if the other kid is pascal

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

that might be pascal lel

Lyall

pascal and din

mariah (rainy day dreams)

mind blown

Kabocha

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2460520/067/ Conan has forgotten something though

Amarok

i subscribe to that was Conan and Din in the first few

Mahotou

i thought it was conan at one point and pascal at another point. and now i just dont know

Amarok

and he has memory loss

Lyall

it's just some random kiddos, gosh

Amarok

and has a history in Evenheim

Lyall

for establishing shot

Amarok

else why would the City Daemon help him

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

The woman is Conan's mom shot

Superjustin of Time and Space

Dang Kabo I love these too much

RebelVampire

well one of the kids is din. unless theres another green eyed floof person

Amarok

im guessing said scene was shortly after Conan's mom died and deadbeat dad left

Superjustin of Time and Space

your sketches

Lyall

oh wait there's more to the kiddos

wow i completely forgot about this part, LOL

okay yeah that's def Din

no doubt

i remember i knew that when i read it

cause it's pretty obvious

unless he has a twin

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

that was 17 years before the start of the story

Kabocha

gotta be Din. 'cause dem green eyes

Lyall

and the hair

RebelVampire

i lean towards its pascal just cause it being conan is too obvious imo.

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

he has floofy hair

Lyall

yeah

and he's better dressed than conan cause he's wearing blue

blue always the best

Respheal

xD

Kabocha

but we've also seen Conan's dad

and conan's dad is kinda fancy.

Lyall

well it's not din's boyfriend

can cross that off

RebelVampire

conan is their half brother O_O and his mom was a princess so he got a less shitty life

problem solved

Respheal

I mean, I haven't introduced that many characters yet xD So it's either one of them or someone tht hasn't been introduced yet~~~~

Lyall

that's very magi rebel, hahah

Superjustin of Time and Space

introduce more

Respheal

ikr

soooooooooon

ish

Lyall

conan is alibaba

Respheal

Soon in webcomic time

RebelVampire

LOL

it could be someone new tho, i dont discount that.

its not lucie

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

webcomic time = 10 years

RebelVampire

she is also crossed off the list

Lyall

i thought she was related to din cause of her black hair

mother or sister

RebelVampire

who are you talking about draco?

Respheal

The woman from the prologue I presume(edited)

Lyall

yus

Superjustin of Time and Space

k I'm gonna listen to some music, you guys enjoy the rest of the chat

Respheal

Alrighty, have fun!

Lyall

kay, laterz Super~!

Superjustin of Time and Space

Thanks~ And laterz!

RebelVampire

thank for coming super~!

Superjustin of Time and Space

You're welcome. ^_^

Kabocha

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2294666/003/ The last line on this page

The hate between Din and Conan is not quite strong enough

Lyall

oh

Kabocha

you know how some comics have power of friendship? These guys gotta be powered by hate. :'3

Lyall

this

Respheal

LOL

Amarok

right now its mutual distrust and distaste

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

rip

Lyall

doesn't this imply that din is borrowing power from people he hates to change the world to his own ideals so he is a two faced snake that's going to betray his master at some point, lol

Amarok

especially wiht that accent and old outfit

Kabocha

Right now Conan is basically the one in charge...

Well.

Lyall

sorta

he's not really

Kabocha

Yeah.

Of Pascal.

Respheal

xD

Lyall

din is borrowing power from whoever told him to get conan

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yep

he was looking for Conan's dad too I think

Respheal

Correct

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

which is something strange

Respheal

Wondering where the heck he is, anyway

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

cus Din and Conan gave different years on how long he was missing

Lyall

check the brothels

Amarok

imagines din with a "wheres felix" book(edited)

RebelVampire

what sort of power are we talking about tho? like do you have to be bound to someone to access more magic? are we talking about political power? etc.

Respheal

xD

Lyall

i think it's more a position of power

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

mind power?

Lyall

like a rank of some sort

RebelVampire

cause if were talking about rank

Lyall

well not official rank

RebelVampire

what if that lady was a court magician and she took the boys in and trained them

Lyall

but more access to stuff

maybe but she was dressed pretty poor too

Respheal

How many doodles did you make??? xDDDD

lmao

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Does the king have the same powers as conan does?

Kabocha

I'm doing these as I go

RebelVampire

her dress was pretty nice imo. plain but nice

Mahotou

rank is involved with the command ability right?

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

it does?

Lyall

her hair made me think she's poor tho

Mahotou

and i think she's a mage from implying they (herself and kid din) are stray dogs

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

again only reading the actual pages

RebelVampire

its possible the king has the same powers cause in res' world info city daemons are generally heard by high ranking officials

Amarok

if it does how does teh rank pass?

Kabocha

I think rank was only mentioned in the comments

Amarok

the old king is dead. long live teh king.. but whos the king?

Kabocha

so it's wild mass guessing at the moment

Lyall

iamking

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

that means conan is in a high position if he can command pascal

Lyall

well if he's the king's son he'd be a prince of some sort maybe(edited)

Mahotou

which i guess bring's his lineage into question (looks at felix)(edited)

Lyall

fuzzy memory tho will not benefit me here

RebelVampire

to be fair some tidbits of info are more a question of did you read the supplemental world info

cause theres some juicy hints in there if you connect some dots

Respheal

This is true

There's a lot of stuff I just plain can't fit in the comic xD But it's usually not 100% necessary info

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

was thinking what if Felix is somehow related to the king

wild guess

Kabocha

Felix is a rival for the throne?

That's a good theory....

Lyall

oh reminds me i was thinking you should put the dusk appendix in the main menu bar if you can

cause i didn't think to look for world information in the about page

only when rebel pointed it out did i know it existed

Kabocha

I'mma subscribe to that one mharz

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

why does the king want Felix and his heir Conan dead?

Mahotou

is felix an illegal baby of royalty? is conan?(edited)

Respheal

Hmm, I can see about making it fit in there

Making Conan a bastard lol

rip

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. Conan himself is rather strange with having a rare ability to hear city daemons. He also has suggested there are important things he may have forgotten. Why or what is Conan that makes him as much a target as his father? Is there are a reason he seems to have hidden abilities? Has he forgotten something that will later be pivotal to the story?

drops question early since were on the topic anyway

Amarok

hes a target cause his father is a target, making him a source of leverage

Kabocha

Someone wants to flush Felix out. :3

Lyall

i just assumed he had his memories hidden to protect him and hide him from others

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I wonder if it's becos Conan's memory was rigged which is why he says his father went missing 14 years instead of 25

RebelVampire

leverage only works if you intend to keep someone alive tho. so i mean hes leverage for din maybe, but not for pascal

or the king

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Like I feel Din's statement is more legit

Amarok

Conan has the ability to hear THAT specific Daemon cause the City Daemon of Evenheim will protect its own people

meaning Conan has history in Evenheim

Kabocha

Could conan be older than people think?

Mahotou

Din's the kidnapper and Pasc is trying to kill Conan. he's targeted not to be ransom but to be killed. why's he a threat?(edited)

Amarok

reinforced by the mark on Dins back, the same mark on Conan's Watch, and the same mark hanging above Evenheim's gate

Lyall

maybe conan isn't a real person

Respheal

Suddenly we've got a D.Gray-Man situation if he's older than people think xD

RebelVampire

yeah i think conan has some sort of high station in evenheim at least

Kabocha

'cause Conan was born in Evenheim, or so we think... There's gotta be some record of it -- so Felix being missing mysteriously for 25 years would be a little odd, eh?

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

rip

Kabocha

unless Evenheim doesn't keep records

Amarok

im thinking Felix or at least the Renaud family used to be in control of Evenheim

Kabocha

OOPS OUR PUBLIC RECORDS GOT BURNT DOWN

Respheal

LOL

Lyall

well if he's assumed dead and had a different name it's easy

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

brb gonna food.

:3

Mahotou

my guess is that while felix went missing, he had conan. so conan knew he was around cuz he was living with his dad

RebelVampire

yeah

thats how i interpreted the 14 vs 25 thing

is that din didnt know where he was

but conan did

Kabocha

oh god, conan's dad was one of those sovereign citizen guys wasn't he

Respheal

oh lord

Kabocha

that's the REAL reason Conan has missing memories

RebelVampire

it couldve been conan's mom who was from the affluential family. felix is just some bum

Kabocha

his mom was dying of stress of his dad saying "you can't put me on trial here because that flag is wrong"

Lyall

i hope

his dad is incredibly good looking(edited)

RebelVampire

http://www.galebound.com/cast/

hes the bottom right guy

Lyall

oh geezus

Mahotou

that cast page is a good resource

Lyall

he is

i don't care if he's an asshole he's my new second fave

Respheal

xD

Lyall

looks like you got a bro conan

pascal

Respheal

I had fun with some of these descriptions lololol

Mahotou

Too good for this cruel world

Lyall

like

pascal looks more like felix's son than conan does

maybe pascal was given conan's real appearance to protect conan

since pascal can protect himself

and is loved less

Amarok

Pascal isnt smart enough to be a decoy

Respheal

His murderin' pants

Amarok

xD

Lyall

maybe pascal is a clone

a magic clone

Feather, Duke of Hot Leaf Juice

I am finally home, so I ahve to say this

RebelVampire

pascal is too good for this world and wait a second pascal has green eyes

Amarok

he gets back to the king after completing the task

Feather, Duke of Hot Leaf Juice

So that horse might be a person

Lyall

maybe the horse is felix

Feather, Duke of Hot Leaf Juice

That was my crack theory for the longest time

Respheal

wat

Lyall

felix is an animagus

Kabocha

he's a cat.

Amarok

"congratulations captain murderpants on a job well done" "but im only a lieutenant" "I just promoted you"

Lyall

felix the cat

har har har

Feather, Duke of Hot Leaf Juice

Alright now I got that here I'm gonna poof, I feel like dying sorry qwq

Lyall

kay~! laterz Feather~!

Feather, Duke of Hot Leaf Juice

But yes, my crack theory was the mare was a person who happens to be the true heir and all the jazz

Respheal

Hahahaha drop in to post that crack theory and then poof out xDD

Alrighty see ya o/

Lyall

don't you mean

Respheal

Get feelin better

Lyall

true mare

Kabocha

during the dark hour, Artemis was a ... night mare

I'll see myself out thank you

Respheal

But yes, that's where Pascal got the cinnabon part of his nickname

RebelVampire

i wonder if its telling that felix and conan have middle names but the others dont. is this an indication of their fancy O_O

Lyall

mark of royalty

or pretentious namers

Respheal

Bit of a family tradition

Conan's grandpa's name is Matthias, and his great-grandpa would've been a Lucas

And on it goes

Lyall

ooooooooh

i drank way too much caffeine today

Kabocha

If Conan isn't ejected from the gene pool

Respheal

lol

Kabocha

his kid should probably have the name "felix" at some point(edited)

BUT WHAT HAPPENS IF THERE'S A SECOND CHILD

Lyall

conan's real name is Felix Jr.

RebelVampire

then the second child is banished

there can only be one

Respheal

xDDD

Kabocha

this is why pascal wants to kill conan

Lyall

how spartan

but conan is younger

Kabocha

Conan was the favorite.

:3

Lyall

but he doesn't dress as well

Kabocha

Clearly not.

Lyall

fashion too important

Kabocha

his dad was a hobo. Lyall

no he's wearing an ascot

Mahotou

that's why conan was hidden away as a stable boi

Lyall

hobos don't wear ascots

Kabocha

Din's sleeping on the ground right now

and he was in an alley with a blanket and probably a hobo then :'3

Din is King Hobo.

Lyall

no he was poor then

and sleeping on the ground is necessity

Kabocha

So you mean Din had a whirlwind of success?

Mahotou

he travels on foot and by caravan. sounds like a bumkin

Lyall

no din sold his soul to the devil of the story

Respheal

To be fair, Maho, they haven't gotten around to trains yet xD

Kabocha

Really, that part of things had to be a breeze.

Mahotou

so Res, how's din's soul looking on that pedistal?

Respheal

owo

Kabocha

Wait, if Din sold his soul to a devil...

Where is Rex.

Lyall

everywhere always

Mahotou

lol

Kabocha

it all comes back to freaking Rex.

Respheal

I'm gonna start responding to theory questions with a kyubey expression

Mahotou

yey!

Kabocha

"Wanna make a contract?"

Lyall

rex is a terrible bad guy, i hope res did better than that, hahah

RebelVampire

on a more serious note din said that theyre after "felix or his heir" so does that mean they knew felix only had one kid or that there can only be one heir so if felix had more kids it doesnt matter?

Lyall

gawd I hope Felix had a whole bunch of kids

Respheal

Good question!

Lyall

his kitten litter

Respheal

Din:

Lyall

Felix: Find them all Din, now find me

Respheal

THIS ISN'T POKEMON LOL

THERE IS NO CATCH 'EM ALL

xD

RebelVampire

this is why felix left. he has to go around the world having kids

Lyall

Felix: Sorry Din, my duty in life is to make babies with every one i meet

Kabocha

oh god

Respheal

omg xD

Lyall

Felix: I must share the beauty that is I

Kabocha

Felix's theme song is now Vanilla.

(by Gackt)

Lyall

rather Booty Call

Respheal

-dies-

Amarok

welp gotta go for now

Respheal

Awww, see ya! o/

Amarok

i may be back

Lyall

Bye Amarok~! Thank you for coming~!

Respheal

Thanks for joining :D

Ah heck

You guys are asking good questions though >:3

RebelVampire

thanks for coming Amarok~!

Lyall

i know nothing about Felix but he is now a full time player in my mind

Respheal

And have grazed a fair number of truths(edited)

Lyall

the horse was conan's mother all along

RebelVampire

i think we could also ask why now? like theyve not cared for 25 years about felix but now theyre like "welp better go assassinate him"

Mahotou

maybe they were looking for him for 25 years tho maybe the question is, who let slip that felix has a boy in the horse land(edited)

Lyall

his gambling debt got too high

RebelVampire

thats true it mightve just take 25 years

yeah thats an equally valid question

why do they suddenly know about conan

Lyall

omg he looks like Loki from Matantei Loki Ragnarok there

RebelVampire

did felix send them a letter and was like "hey guys just want to tell you i definitely dont have a secret son in this location."

Lyall

http://www.absoluteanime.com/mythical_detective_loki_ragnarok/loki.jpg

cause it's obscure

Respheal

Definitely don't go to the ranch in Norin that has a sign saying "Renaud Ranch". No one of interest there.

Kabocha

:'3

RebelVampire

His name is definitely not conan either.

Kabocha

Felix goofed up there

Lyall

good going felix

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

what I miss?

Lyall

felix not smart, just lucky

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

huh?

RebelVampire

were talking about why everyone came to get conan now instead of earlier

Respheal

I think we were talking about why people are after Felix and Conan

Yeah

Lyall

yus

Respheal

3. Conan himself is rather strange with having a rare ability to hear city daemons. He also has suggested there are important things he may have forgotten. Why or what is Conan that makes him as much a target as his father? Is there are a reason he seems to have hidden abilities? Has he forgotten something that will later be pivotal to the story?

-copy-pastes the question-(edited)

-cuz I kinda forgot what the question was too-

xD

Kabocha

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Lyall

Icanfinallydotext OTL

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

oh

RebelVampire

throws confetti for draco

Kabocha

Answering this question is hard

Lyall

i always assumed conan was a prince

RebelVampire

i definitely think whatever conan forgot is important

Lyall

or something to that effect

RebelVampire

cause of the amulet

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

he's an outsider prince

Kabocha

Conan forgot his mom.

Lyall

prince of demons

prince of pizza

Respheal

wat

Kabocha

Like, seriously, that lady in the flashback

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

they have pizza?

RebelVampire

Din: Conan what do you remember about your mother? Conan: ....I have a mother?

Lyall

do they have pizza?

i've no idea

Kabocha

LOL

Respheal

Probably something LIKE pizza

Lyall

omg conan that's sad

Respheal

Aww

Lyall

Conan: Wait, what's a mother

Respheal

OH NO

Kabocha

CONAN WAS BORN IN A TEST TUBE

Lyall

Din: I am your mother

Respheal

Suddenly Lost Boy

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

omg

Respheal

WAT

Mahotou

he was just talking about how he was upset that his dad didn't come to her funeral too. (edited)

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Din is not a Damon, Draco

Lyall

it's a dark hole i can paint you

Kabocha

http://www.galebound.com/comics/2460520/067/ But no, seriously, I feel like this was really really heavily implied

RebelVampire

no i definitely think thats his mom too

Kabocha

either that or conan has an older sister

RebelVampire

in the flashback

Lyall

it's

his first wife

Kabocha

conan had a wife

Mahotou

i thought he may have forgotten what her last words were

Lyall

yus

Kabocha

omg

so he really IS older

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

Lyall

conan is really a lot older than he looks

but when he was hidden he was made younger

Kabocha

add another 11 years onto that

Lyall

because he too is a magician

Respheal

Ha, add 11 years and he'd be Din's age

Lyall

shot

maybe

conan is felix

and pascal is his son

RebelVampire

i dont think were going that far into the twilight zone

Lyall

hey it can work

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LMAO

Lyall

you can connect the bridges to make it work

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Draco it's not reincarnation

Mahotou

Kabo is SO PREPARED with these images xD(edited)

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

stahp applying Zenchav logic here

Lyall

Conan: Why do you look so much worse than with your age lines

Respheal

And then suddenly Din and Conan are fraternal twins

Lyall

i can connect anything

do not take theories from me

Kabocha

@Mahotou -- no, I'm actually literally drawing this as I go

I know I said I'd prepare stuff, but I can't make this up

RebelVampire

so one thing conan definitely forgot in that flashback is the amulet cause clearly hed seen it before

Lyall

kabo super good at drawing fast(edited)

yus

and his first horse

that someone stole

:<

Respheal

Probably Parker lol

(jk)

Lyall

gdi parker

Respheal

xD

Kabocha

we need to see Parker in comic

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Kabo is like a cali

Respheal

Someday!

Lyall

yus

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

is parker cute?

Lyall

always the important question

Kabocha

parker's drunk all the time XD

Respheal

^

Lyall

:<

Respheal

He's uh.....

Lyall

that's not cute

maybe

Respheal

He's made an appearance in a lil derp comic I did for TWC

Lyall

is his first name peter

Respheal

https://respheal.tumblr.com/post/156311533421/twc-challenge-2-featuring-conan-and-his

Lyall

awww kiss him parker

when he's awake

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

aww he's a cute tubby guy RebelVampire

QUESTION 4. Din tells Conan that the reason Conan is being hunted is because of Conan’s father, Felix. What exactly did Felix do to make so many enemies? Where do you think he went? Is he dead or is he out wandering the world somewhere? Do you think Conan will run into him or is Felix’s role inconsequential?

Lyall

my eyes are tired so i read hunted as haunted

Kabocha

Felix stole a horse.

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

the king's horse

Artemis is the king's horse

Mahotou

i think conan will meet with felix somewhere down the line.

Kabocha

Also, probably slept with someone's sister that he shouldnta

Lyall

well felix slept with a lot of people's significant others

Respheal

And that's when Conan punches the hell outta Felix (jk lol.....or am I?)(edited)

Lyall

UnU

RebelVampire

conan should punch felix anyway

say thanks for leaving to get milk and not coming back, dad

Lyall

Felix: Come son, let us embrace

Kabocha

So, who did Conan inherit his ahoge from?

His ma or his pa

Lyall

the pressing questions

Respheal

That's actually a good question

That I don't remember the answer to

Lyall

D:

Respheal

-looks up refs-

Mahotou

its the grandpa

Lyall

from the horse

UvU

Kabocha

OH WAIT

I know

neither. XD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Felix: You shall do my bidding

takes over the underworld

Lyall

no felix that's bad

Respheal

If rank is determined by ahoge, Pascal is probably higher ranked

Lyall

lolol

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

oh wait that's a different story

Lyall

Felix: Conan let me show you my magic bag

I hope Conan's real name is Katz

Kabocha

Yeah, Pascal would have the larger of the two ahoge

Respheal

Katz?

Mahotou

Pasc has windmill sweeping hair

Kabocha

...Those two I DID draw yesterday

Lyall

like Cat

so it's Felix and Katz

Respheal

omg

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL

Lyall

and a magic bag

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Felix the Katz

Lyall

do not let me name things, i'm sorry

Kabocha

How much DOES conan know about his dad

Lyall

nothing probably

how much does conan know about himself even

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Felix is probably a threat to overthrow the king which is why they want he and Conan dead

RebelVampire

well he knows hes missing

Lyall

how can you know your dad if you don't know yourself

Kabocha

that's deep.

Respheal

Well, Conan has hinted a bit as to how much he knows about his dad

Which is to say: not much

Lyall

Conan: I had a dad?

Respheal

OH NO XDDDD

Lyall

Conan: I thought I was born from these horses and Parker

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

might be fabricated

definitely fabricated memory

Lyall

yeah that's true

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

poor guy

Lyall

even if he had a memory it could be false

Kabocha

have we seen conan's belly button yet

Lyall

conan is an unreliable source for info atm

Kabocha

DOES HE HAVE A BELLY BUTTON

Respheal

........wat

xDDD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yep

Kabocha

if he's not got parents

like, if he was some sort of magical being

would he actually have one?

Respheal

Alright Conan, lift yer shirt

Lyall

does conan have abs,

the important questions

Respheal

hell yeah

Boy works on a farm all day

Lyall

10/10

RebelVampire

>v>

Lyall

work it farm boy

Mahotou

he had a nice back

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

he's ripped

Kabocha

Din also has a nice back.

and a nice tattoo

Mahotou

that page where he took off his shirt

#hesstrippingagain

Lyall

The tattoo is proof he sold his soul

for powah

RebelVampire

it looks more like a brand than a tattoo to me. like someone took a hot poker and put it to his back. and it went sizzle sizzle

Lyall

my first thought was what he's advertising

Mahotou

being branded gave him powerzz

Lyall

someone used din as a billboard

Mahotou

powerful slave?

Lyall

that's really a company

RebelVampire

or being branded is him being marked as magician cattle O_O

Lyall

ooooooh

Mahotou

that

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Din Works for Conan's clan

Lyall

that's what i think

Kabocha

I feel like I've seen din's tattoo somewhere in comic tho

Lyall

slave to conan's family

RebelVampire

the watch

Lyall

yus

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Pascal works for the King

Lyall

but maybe it's not the real king

RebelVampire

its the same emblem on conan's watch or looks supsiciously similar

Lyall

maybe felix was the real king, but went into hiding

that's why he's missing

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yep

maybe it was invaded

Lyall

yis

Mahotou

sht someone help me compare the watch to din's sholder

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

then King whoeverhisname is

Lyall

we shall call him Gink

King Gink

Mahotou

Gink-king?

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

is scared that Conan's clan will go revenge

RebelVampire

draco you cant always just make new names by spelling backwards

Respheal

Watch: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2362830/035/ Shoulder: http://www.galebound.com/comics/2369956/040/

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

which is why he wants Felix and his heir dead

Lyall

yes I can

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

LOL draco

Respheal

@Mahotou ^

Lyall

Conan's real name is Nanoc

maybe Felix is a robin hood type

pushed into hiding but doing good for the poor

but he looks like an ass

so i doubt it

RebelVampire

but i cant say for sure about the similarities. theyre just suspiciously similar.

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

draco

Conan's mind is fabricated as to protech him

well that was kinda obvious(edited)

Lyall

yis

Kabocha

I feel like I remember seeing a comment once about some of the scenery in Evenheim and I'm like what are some of these comments talking about

cameos?

Kabocha

and other stuff

Respheal

Hahaha if it makes it easier to refer to the king Din's looking to overthrow, King Cymaria works (they go by their city-state name sometimes)

Ah yeah there were a few pages with cameos from other comics

Lyall

maybe the king is a woman

cause their name ends in A

i'm sorry i really drank too much caffeine

RebelVampire

if this is a matter of felix is the true king i still dont get why theyd wait so long to deal with him. not to mention even if he changed his name i think hed be found out cause a king being dethroned is kind of a big deal

Lyall

yeah that's true rebel

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

probably because Conan is more powerful

and they were waiting him to grow up

lel

Lyall

but maybe he's a different kind of royalty

i'm not fully theorized in the construct of the world

RebelVampire

im not talking about conan im talking about felix

Lyall

so the hierarchy of such could be different than the assumed

RebelVampire

conan wouldnt of been born yet

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

but it's related

Respheal

Conan's 22, for reference

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

wait

he's 22?

Lyall

like maybe there's a different kind of royalty amongst the magician

than with the lands

Mahotou

its in the cast page too right?

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

again, I didn't read anything aside the main pages

Respheal

It's fine ^^

It's all optional supplementary stuff hiding back there lol

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

it's more fun to speculate that way

RebelVampire

yeah conan is 22 so he was born 3 years after din and his cohorts think felix went missing.

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Felix ran away

Lyall

i want to read it all again, and the supplemental stuff :<

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

met the magician girl

lived with them for 11 years

Lyall

looks at pile of pages to draw

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

then ran away again

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

rip my theory

Lyall

would felix be din's father then

Respheal

:3

Lyall

wha

RebelVampire

so i guess felix left when conan was 8?

Respheal

Oh nah I'm just trolling with my reactions mostly xD

All of the theories have been good!

Correct

22-14=8

Wait

Lyall

bad parenting felix

Respheal

Yeah

Lyall

abandoning your son

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

psh who does that

Lyall

for the greater good

of brothels

no not you rex

get back in your hole

Kabocha

We need an icon for Felix now

Respheal

That would be the grumpiest icon

Lyall

felix joins dad of the year club

Respheal

xD

RebelVampire

you can never have enough grumpy icons

Mahotou

i think Din's grin would be more appropriate for Res.

xD

Respheal

That's like the criteria for being a Magician: have a blood-curdling evil grin

RebelVampire

i really love the pattern on pascal's shirt random

Lyall

lolololol

yus

Respheal

Pascal likes dressin up

Lyall

he wears it well

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

he and din are

Mahotou

Pasc "i'm an assasin so i'm in all black but i wanna stand out and be fancy soooo RED CRAVAT"

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

yiss

Respheal

LOL

Lyall

lolol

Respheal

Hahaha Pascal wears the red cravat solely cuz it matches his magic's color

He's like IT MATCHES YES

Kabocha

and his eyes!

Lyall

omg XD that dork

Kabocha

also the blood of his enemies!

Respheal

Well yeah the ring around the eyes matches their magic too

Kabocha

res, where's that stupid pic of pascal I drew

Respheal

(Din's is kinda hard to see sometimes--I gotta fix that)

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I like red so I approve

Lyall

blueisbest

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

red

Lyall

blue

Respheal

>w>

Respheal

Gonna quote @Mahotou here

"WHO'S BLUE?????"

Lyall

felix?

RebelVampire

the entire comic

Respheal

Now it is! xD

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

draco

Lyall

mharz

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

no

Lyall

yes

ironically mharz's name is blue and mine is red

RebelVampire

with 6 minutes left to go does anyone have any closing thoughts?

Lyall

ummm

tell us all the secrets

Respheal

Since we're getting close to it, I was gonna mention what the next chapter's gonna be called

#speculation

Mahotou

OOOOOOOOOO

Kabocha

:3

Respheal

Chapter 4: Hear, Obey, Defy

:3

Mahotou

*looks at Din

RebelVampire

rip conan

Lyall

din gonna disobey

tsks

it's okay din

i support you

kill him if necessary

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

be free Din, be free

Lyall

yus

free your genie bond

Respheal

Hahaha funny you should mention that

Din -> djinn

Lyall

oh i noticed

Respheal

xD

Lyall

and then i forgot

Respheal

LOL

Lyall

but now i remember

Kabocha

When's Din gonna have another slasher smile?

RebelVampire

but were all assuming it means din gonna betray conan i think. it could be that they cross the bridge, someone is like "din you take that boy to the king gosh" and then din is like no go jump off a bridge

Lyall

look at din

of course he's going to betray him

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

I trust Din

with my pennies

Respheal

:3

RebelVampire

i trust artemis

Lyall

I trust din to do what's right for the story

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Artemis is best

Lyall

i trust din to do what's right for din too

unless

he forms a really really strong bond with conan

which could happen

but he does not have that atm

Respheal

Hahaha I will say, a lot of you were SERIOUSLY on the right track

I was screaming

xD

Lyall

it was the horse theory wasn't it

Respheal

Yes

You caught me

Lyall

felix is a horse

Respheal

Conan's mom never died, she's been the horse all along

Lyall

just horsing around

RebelVampire

to be fair tho if din wants to overthrow the king its not to his advantage yet to betray conan if conan is some necessary component

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Din wants to be king

RebelVampire

i approve of King Din

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

overthrows the king first then makes conan the king

Lyall

i feel like a lot of the story pieces are still missing for me to make a real judgement on who's right and wrong

Lyall

I support king Din 100%

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

then overthrow conan

Lyall

i want a picture of king Din

Kabocha

Res was totally blown away by the theories.

Respheal

Yeah, that's the thing--there is a LOT of missing info right now

Lyall

i feel he'd be very lelouch

Respheal

More info will come of course.....but then that might just spawn MORE QUESTIONS

-evil laugh-

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

gonna wait until chapter 10

Lyall

d'aaaaw

Mharz of Angels & Punchy Ladies

Likes to pile up things

Respheal

Oh heck chapter ten's gonna be nuts

Lyall

res so good at keeping spoilers

Respheal

.....so is every chapter up to that but y'know

RebelVampire

Unfortunately, the scheduled Comic Tea Party is now complete~! Thank you everyone so much for joining this week’s chat~! That being said, if you would like to continue discussing the comic, we encourage you to do so~! We want to give a big thank you to Respheal, as well, for volunteering Galebound for our reading queue. If you liked the comic, please be sure to support Respheal’s efforts. If you have questions, concerns, or suggestions about CTP, please feel free to PM me, or e-mail me at [email protected].

With that said, next week’s Comic Tea Party will focus on Voidchild by David Lindholm. Please use this week to read as much of the comic as you would like. Hope to see you next Thursday (October 12th) from 5PM to 7PM PDT~! Until then~! Comic: https://tapas.io/series/voidchild/

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #comic bookclub #bookclub #start faire #startfaire #comic tea party #ctp #comicteaparty #respheal #galebound

[cnisms]

bye ... i’m truly done taking up muses ... these are short n poorly written but i did them ! i’ll eventually add more information on everyone when i finally get around to finishing muse pages but honestly ? this is all u need to know for now. again, if u wanna plot, just hmu :P a few mentions of drugs n alcoholism but nothing descriptive. here’s percy, zach, ajay, luke, bunny, paris & luma ! (i’ve added gwen, helena n gia too just so they’re all in one place bc i’m lazy)

FINN COLE, CIS MALE, HE/HIM — have you met perseus sage nichols yet ? the twenty-two year old is known for being both astute and jocular, but also very obstreperous and arrogant. born in melbourne, percy now lives in kensington, working as a junior management consultant.  comes from a nice family that he will always be pissed off at for very little reason. has beef w his dad for not providing even tho he really did, it was just never enough for percy. is exactly the type of dude that got mad when leo didn’t win the oscar for wolf. just wanted to be dumb rich n coked out. v smart and got an international scholarship at a good university, by the time he got kicked out for being a rowdy asshole, he’d helped his friends develop some legit apps (the most successful one being a dating app which two yrs later is really just a meme) and they suddenly had a lot of money, he just bought his way back in. bc he was in charge of the business side of things, it was easy enough for him to screw over his friends n walk away w most of what was left when their success went down the drain. got a job as a management consultant at a big, scary firm in london mostly thanks 2 his reputation. is a known ugly n ruthless n desperate to be at the top n live in disgusting luxury. can’t talk to his family or old pals without Wanting To Die bc he’s so committed to this new life he’s created for himself. is literally awful if he doesn’t like u, still awful just in a less hurtful n more annoying way if he does. doesn’t know when to stop. always forgetting n probably trying to hide the fact that he’s not a trust fund baby like all the people he hangs with now. literally just clyde oberholt ?

JAMIE BLACKLEY, CIS MALE, HE/HIM — have you met zachary vaughn baltazar yet ? the twenty-five year old is known for being both unostentatious and sincere, but also very self-deprecating and uncouth. born in berlin, zach now lives in southwark, working as a telemarketer. the nice guy who is always getting rekt (he wrecking himself lbr) is Um .. a v talented writer but is happy just shitting on his work n never exploring his potential bc why bother when he has the ideal amount of friends n weed atm right ? given up and is convinced he is satisfied, will accept any invitation. still won’t let you live tho. has opinions on ur choices and will probably share them behind ur back. somehow feels underappreciated by everyone even tho he truly believes there is nothing to appreciate. omg have a cry and grow up. king of impressive first dates n writes rlly romantic poetry but is either ghosting or getting ghosted the following week bc he is dry and confused. doesn’t know if this is really what he wants/doesn’t feel like he deserves what he wants. close with his family but tries to force more n more distance bc he can’t stand their #drama... or any drama that doesn’t give him an edge Actual Of Ly. the ders of the squad probably.

RAHUL KOHLI, CIS MALE, HE/HIM — have you met ajay charles johal yet ? the thirty year old is known for being both urbane and jovial, but also very restless and quixotic. born in chennai, ajay now lives in newham, as an airline pilot. moved to london w his parents when he was v young, spent all of his teenage yrs feeling guilty for no reason just like watching all his parents did for him to be happy n healthy ? never got over the guilt. is just a v feeling person ig ! anyways he was so committed to helping his parents out, which was rlly truly the only thing he’s ever committed to in his life. needed enough money to support all three of them but rlly had no idea how to go about it. pilot was just one of the ideas handed to him back in high school n he went with it bc he knew he’s never actually settle on anything. turned out ok bc he likes being able 2 actually get the entire hell away from his problems. a v flighty person (aha... classic) and doesn’t have many close relationships bc of it. v respected ... v respectful ... quality lad but can be a lil immature under it all. wish he’d stop feeling bad just bc he has GOOD parents.

TOBY REGBO, CIS MALE, HE/HIM — have you met luciano andrius falley yet ? the twenty-five year old is known for being both genial and cultivated, but also very irksome and delphic. born in naples, luke now lives in camden, as a struggling actor and annoying historian. tragic backstory ? never heard of that. comes from a supportive ($$$ n <333) family who probably only pay for the many flights for all his long ass self discovery backpacking trips bc deep down they can’t put up with him anymore. is a super friendly n outgoing person, the type that is literally always reading a book he only half understands but will bring up what he has learned from it at one of his MANY dinner parties where ur only option is CHICKEN and lots of wine while he refuses to SHUT THE FRICK UP. cute ! kinda very judgemental but will just sigh n let u fuck up. “not to get political but...” is always like Hm Yes ! I Love Hearing Other People’s Stories ! but when ? when does he hear anything other than his own voice ? he probably gives himself lectures on intersectional feminism when he’s home alone he just doesn’t stop. honestly he only ever means well n ig he’s interesting enough but Really... fake struggling yet still pretentious aesthetics.

MARGOT ROBBIE, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER — have you met elizabeth celine leblanc ? the twenty-seven year old is known for being both coruscating and ardent, but also very egocentric and bourgeois. born in seattle, bunny now lives in southwark, as an influential homemaker. boozy housewife. spent her childhood living below the poverty line before her father began helping ppl smuggle drugs into america. he built his own big operation off of that (with a hygiene product company as a cover) and was successful enough to squash the few people it pissed off. business spread to europe n then when he was ready to retire and the south gang was interested, he had elizabeth marry into it before he sold the operation just to make sure he would always be taken care of. it got handed down to her husband bc she wasn’t interested in any legit roles (her asshole fathers fault honestly ? he wouldn’t have given her control even if she wanted it) and she just went along with whatever would keep her from returning to her Humble Beginnings. is very “i do whatever i have to in order to survive” n by survive she means never actually work n just waltz around a mansion in designer gowns all day. materialistic n v selfish. fake charitable for her socialite image. doesn’t cook, but is always sharing recipes. has no real interest in the soap she pretends to make. is consistently fake. literally gets zero joy from anything that isn’t spending money. could probably be happy if she could escape her family’s ugly beliefs n misogynistic practices n she’s getting there but just . slowly. hates the nickname bunny, but i’m forcing the meme.

MIMI ELASHIRY, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER — have you met paris nefret bayoumi yet ? the twenty year old is known for being both beneficent and equable, but also very disengaging and inelegant. born in alexandria, paris now lives in greenwich, practicing herbalism. also works at the rosado but whom cares ? not her ! all she cares abt are the HERBS. was raised by her grandmother who was a Kitchen Witch (as in .. u know ... this isnt a supernatural rp But that woman was a witch !) so she’s always practiced similar hobbies but now she’s all about making her friends custom teas ! n yea paris likes to claim that she’s also a witch. is extra but in a calm n collected way. serene at all times but unintentionally sardonic. not super bright but has plenty of advice for every problem. seems to enjoy oversharing and yet no one knows exactly whats the deal w her parents (criminals that have always been n remain in hiding, some people think they’re straight up pirates now) or anything serious in her life rlly . but u wanna know what russells burp smelt like last week ? she’s about to tell u.

SOFIA BLACK-D'ELIA, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER — have you met luma camille pontecorvo yet ? the twenty-three year old is known for being both optimistic and dexterous, but also very prevaricating and overindulged. born in quebec city, luma now lives in waltham forest, working in retail.  ah , another brat . she was left w her much older half brother n his wife when he mom dipped when she was fourteen n honestly they felt so bad n also had no idea how to handle her so they just . gave her everything she wanted without question. she had her mothers bad attitude n reckless habits tho n when she started getting her nieces n nephews in trouble once they were all in college together, her brother Politely kicked her out of their lives by offering to set her up anywhere she wanted “for the Experience”. she picked london n quickly got a job at a kingsley store n has been working there for a few yrs now. now also deals party drugs at clubs for the north family n she rlly lets that be the focus of her life, so she’s always showing up to her day job late n overtired. doesn’t ever really lie but rarely tells the whole truth. ig she would be fun to hang out with but she’s probably a fair bit cunty. doesn’t care about ur feelings, has very few of her own, just here for a meme. truthfully she’s angry abt everyone ditching her but it gets ugly whenever the topic comes up n dark!luma is an actual thing that makes an appearance.

MADCHEN AMICK, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER — have you met gwendolyn griet hathaway yet ? the forty-three year old is known for being both reverent and winsome, but also very acquisitive and ambivalent. born in las vegas, gwen now lives in richmond upon thames, managing a record label. also known as gwen nash. mother to gertrude bc we meme too hard. born in nevada, her own momther bailed early n then her father disappeared when she was fourteen (she’s always been sure he was murdered by a biker gang but no one believed her n kept saying he just ran off on her but ! the story comes up whenever she drinks still) n she ended up just getting a cleaning job in a motel n taking care of herself. eventually she met a nice older couple who sort of took her in. they were responsible for a lot of jazz artists n she stanned them hard ? sang for them for a short while n eventually married their son mostly bc she wanted to actually be part of the family yikes… anyway they had a Beautiful Daughter together obviously n eventually got control of the label n thats all they rlly share now post separation. tragic n twenty years later than everyone expected . anyway she’s lurkin about london, lookin for talent n trying to fix her relationship with gertrude (i’d hate my mom if she named me that too … no a fence) n just drinkin wine ig ! she’s very … impulsive and only ever thinks about herself in the moment but otherwise ? she can be kind n caring but Ya . her habit of just jumping into things for her own pleasure generally hurts other people so she’s a lot of strained relationships. still seems v standoffish mostly bc she’s Um . Scared Of Everything. literally does not matter how much shit she sees ? permanently spooked. lowkey cruel sense of humor but she just seems so gentle 95% of the time that when she makes a sick joke ur like Oh she doesn’t realize how bad that sounds ! hates memes.

LILY JAMES, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER — have you met helena therese o’shea yet ? the twenty-six year old is known for being both cultivated and strong-willed, but also very callous and tenacious. born in chicago, helena now lives in wandsworth, working at erstead’s and planning birthday parties. a tragedy. always had it in her head that she was better than everyone else (especially her brother ) but never fully committed to the brat act, like she never threw tantrums or asked for too much, v well mannered n proper but it’s always been obvious that she’s permanently disgusted by everyone except for herself. sometimes also disgusted by herself tho. will say something cringeworthy n just about put a hit on herself for it. was a v successful wedding planner for a while, her business took off rlly quick thanks to a few helpful connections. got engaged herself 3 years ago and cut off most of her family n all her old friends to start this new amazing life she always thought she deserved ? sike. after three years of putting off the wedding, she got dumped n came home to work @ erstead’s bc she’s like well if i’m gonna crash this hard i might as well hit rock bottom ! plans birthday parties for children occasionally. hates children. hates everything. fun ? never experienced that emotion. barely tries to make up with the people she wronged bc despite setting herself back 6 yrs, she still thinks she’s above everyone else. loves to complain. doesn’t really have much going for her honestly other than ? total commitment to whatever it is that’s happening in her life. obviously that’s not workin out for her rn ?

CHARLI XCX, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER — have you met georgiana lalaine visariya yet ? the twenty-three year old is known for being both jocund and unfeigned, but also very vexatious and lowbrow. born in kiev, gia now lives in soho, being extra on youtube.  gia is honestly .. a headache. she was always a v creative person, ‘expressing herself’ n doin’ the most when literally no one asked ever. she started vlogging two years ago n got bored quickly so instead she decided to start her own (fake) reality series on youtube ? she handled everything by herself at first n reached out to hot local people who were popular on instagram n youtube to star in it WITH HER and only got a few people in on it but ? it took off. now she has a whole crew n writers n what not working on it with her (even tho most of the time she will take over every part of the production n handle it herself again) n it gets her good money (especially bc she’s shameless n stays making sure she’s a main in every single episode so she gets those instagram sponsors too) calls herself “““punk lauren conrad””” n is clearly too extra. a very very confident n loud person, super friendly, loves everyone n honestly u can try to drag her but that’s not gonna stop her running up to u in the street next time she sees u n telling you to drop whatever it is ur doing to go get cocktails with her. she’s so … genuine irl that you literally would not belieb how much of the show is scripted n thought up by her w that … interesting … imagination. will annoy u for content.

#smoke:intro #im not proofreading so Expect me repeating myself #its too cold for anything so #see u in the morning for attempted replies ! #ᴏᴏᴄ ▓ ⚘ — ❛ intro post ！

[angelicteeth]

Hello!!! Who are some of your favorite fictional characters and why?

aaaaaaaaaaaaa hello, thank you for asking me something…….i greatly appreciate you taking time out of your day to send me a message….this might be long? idk how many ppl i’ll add but i hope you enjoy me sobbing over them

these are in no particular order bc my love for them cannot be placed smh

SO the first boy i wanna talk about is……………………kagami taiga!!! from knb haha…. he is so good????????????? ill probably say this for all of them HAHA oops hes just…..my weaknesses are leos tbvh and he is just so??? I DONT HAVE WORDS TO DESCRIBE HIM OKAY. i just i love him i love his hair and how competitive he is and how enthusiastic he is about basketball and cooking and i love how sweet he is and just!!! him!!!!! he probably smells so good too and he has huge ass sweaters that u know i would wear ALL THE TIME and im just………………i swoon,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,so much………..for him…………my baby…his smile!!! makes me wanna die!!!! too pure!!! HIS LAUGH OH MAN!!!!! i am a SUCKER for him!!! he makes me feel…blissful and happy and warm and he’s so???? IDK HES DUMB BUT HES SMART AND HES KINDA ANGRY BUT HES JUST ENTHUSIASTIC AND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE IS SO GOOD I WANT TO GIVE HIM THE WORLD AND MORE HE IS SUNSHINE ALRIGHT THANKS. he just makes me so incredibly happy and whenever i think about him i just feel so full of love and light and warmth and he is truly amazing and its so bad bc im the type to point at a character before i watch the show/near the beginning and say ‘that one! thats the one!’ AND I HATE IT BC ITS ALMOST ALWAYS TRUE BUT ANYWAYS I WOULD WRITE MORE BUT ID JUST CONTINUOUSLY REPEAT MYSELF AND IVE SAID I LOVE HIM ENOUGH ALREADY jk i can never say that enough HAHA OKOK ONE MORE THING ONE MORE!!! I BET U HE GIVES THE BEST HUGS LIKE UUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ITS SO WARM AND SOFT AND HE LIKE MAKES SURE TO HUG YOU ENTIRELY AND MAYBE REST HIS CHIN ON TOP OF YOUR HEAD AND YOU LIKE JUST FEEL SO LOVED AND HAPPY AND FULL OF LIGHT FUCK OK IM DONE

the next boy i wanna talk about is sekizan takuya from all out!! this boy is so fucking cute i cannot put into words how sweet and loving he is. he is one of the most selfless and caring characters i can think of and he is so!!!!!!!!! good!!!!!!!!!!!!! he’s the captain and he feels as if he has to bear everything alone and take on all of the problems but he does not!!! he doESNT HAVE TO BE ALONE THATS NOT HOW IT SHOULD BE AND I WISH I COULD JUST HUG HIM FOREVER AND TELL HIM ITS ALRIGHT AND TELL HIM THAT BEARING THINGS ALONE SHOULDNT HAVE TO HAPPEN AND ITS OKAY TO OPEN UP AND LET OTHER PEOPLE IN AND HELP YOU AND HE IS JUST SO SWEET AND SELFLESS BUT I WISH HE WOULD LEARN TO NOT BEAR THINGS ALL BY HIMSELF! he is so kind and sincere and he even helps teammates on other teams and he tries his hardest to be the best that he can be for his own team and hes just so!!!! amazing!! he’s not afraid to like ‘girly’ or cute things and let me tell you……………that man……………stole my heart……………he is quite possibly THE CUTEST MAN in the WHOLE world ok. his smile?! COULD CURE CANCER. he is literally SO FUCKING GOOD and i want him to know that i love him whole heartedly and that he is so kind! he is so kind and caring and IS JUST SO GOOD! hes sweet tooth is also amazing for me bc i love to bake LOL OMG WHEN THEY WON THEIR FIRST PRACTICE GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE WAS SO HAPPY AND PROUD I WAS BEAMING OH MY GOODNESS HE WAS THE CUTEST I AM SO PROUD OF HIM I AM ALWAYS PROUD OF HIM AND HES SO ENCOURAGING AND HIS HAIR IS SO CUTE EVEN THO HE DYES AND CURLS IT TO BE INTIMIDATING BUT ITS JUST SO CUTE TO ME AND I JUST. LOVE HIM. SO MUCH.

another boy from knb WHO I ADORE SO MUCH is aomine daiki. he. is. so. hot. LIKE OFC SEKIZAN AND KAGAMI ARE HOT TOO LIKE HOLY FUCK BUT AOMINE IS JUST?? IDK HES JUST HOT LMAOOO. thats not the only reason or the main reason i love him obviously but i had to say it………first……….anYWAYS! i love aomine so much! hes just………..kinda super ridiculous? and i love it??? hes so lazy but hes smart yet so dumb!!!!!!!!!! god smh. i love how teasing he is at first and how over time he’d still tease but he’s more ??? content?? and soft?? THIS BOY NEEDS TO KNOW ITS OKAY TO BE SAD AND ITS OKAY TO LET DOWN YOUR GUARD AND ITS OKAY TO LOSE AND ITS OKAY TO FEEL DEFEATED AND ITS OKAY AND THAT ITS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD AND HE’LL GO FAR, HE’LL GO PLACES AND HE IS SO!!!!!!!!!! SWEET!!! i love how kagami helped change him and his character development over time and i love how competitive he is ESPECIALLY with kagami and hes just so!!!!!!!!!! GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he makes me feel??? confident??? ok sekizan and kagami make me feel confident too but idk ignore me he’s just…. he makes me smile and i’d nap with him SO MUCH tbh or at least cuddle him while he napped and i just. i love him so much and i love everything about him and he’s so god damn cute and i wish he wOULD REALIZE HOW GOOD HE IS SMFH AOMINE I LOVE YOU!!!! STUPID!!!!!

alright i think ill talk about one more bc ive already written SO MUCH im so sorry aaaaa but the last one i wanna talk about is murphy from the 100 this boy...................he is the first character i ever fell in love with BEFORE i watched the show and then fell more in love i first discovered him thru fanart on here and was super intrigued by him and was like ????who is this cute boy wtf aND THEN I WATCHED THE SHOW AND LEMME TELL YOU HE WAS SUCH A PUNK IN SEASON 1 AND LIKE BEGINNING ISH OF SEASON 2 OH MY GOD i dont know why i fell in love with him at first! i just knew that i loved him and that was that. after i actually watched the show i realized why i loved him and lISTEN HE HAS GOOD ASS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT OKAY HE JUST!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE HIS ASS SO MUCH AND IDK IF PPL STILL DISLIKE HIM BUT MMMMM IVE ALWAYS LOVED HIM AND THATS PROBABLY NOT THE BEST THING TO ADMIT BUT HE IS SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER I WOULD DIE FOR HIM I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!! SO MUCH!!!!! HE WAS OUTCASTED BUT THEN HE FOUND SOMEONE WHO DIDNT SEE HIM THAT WAY even if i dont ship them doesnt mean i cant appreciate that she saw him for him and not for his mistakes!!! AND IM JUST. SO HAPPY. HE IS SO CUTE AND IS SMILE IS SO FUCKING CUTE AND I RLLY LOVE HIS ACTOR RICHARD HARMON A LOT TOO SO THAT ALSO ADDS TO MY LOVE OF MURPHY HOT DAMN IDEK WHAT IM SAYING ANYMORE BUT I. LOVE. JOHN. MURPHY. YOU CAN FIGHT ME THANKS

i wrote A LOT more than i had originally anticipated but im not surprised LOL i am a very soft person even though i really only show that side to amber bc i trust her THE MOST and it feels kinda nice to express my love for fictional characters...its good...i love them so much.....

i have more fictional characters that i love but here are 4 that i felt inclined to talk about! thank you again for asking me, it makes me so happy anD I HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY RAMBLING ASS OK THANK U XOXO

#ask #anonymous #wow im.................... #i wrote a lot............. #i love them so much........ #im so sorry this is so long #ok maybe im not

[somedaypast-thesunset]

I'm pretty proud of myself today. It's easy to feel like you're doing better when there's no imminent problem - it's coping with those problems that really define "doing better". Today I did better.

I was really upset I didn't get my deposit from welfare and I had alot of negative thoughts like I don't deserve this money anywYs and I should just struggle because it's a hand out but like that's not really okay and even if other people think that they're not stealing food to eat? I live a secondary very poverty filled life. I keep up an act of being healthy or not hungry or not in need. I put an effort into how I look even if I can't really afford to all the time because your less likely to receive help the more you look like you need help.

But this is my honest true life and I actually appreciate my friend seeing through my jokes about it and responding in a moderately serious manner and relating to my plight. It helped set a better honest reality between us as well.

So I cried about it and was frustrated. I wanted to get more overdraft but it's shameful I'm in overdraft already and I shouldn't need to anyways. They wouldn't do it over the phone. I decided to get dressed and take pictures. Then I went to the square and worked on my laptop for an hour before it died and I went home. But then a few hours later, after eating lunch, I went to the library and continued to work on my shop before going home again.

I got frustrated around 5 - still no money and it's been six fucking days. Four business days. Crazy. It's a direct deposit. I went to the bank and asked about it - they had no answer. I asked about overdraft and I had like an awkward meeting with I suppose my financial guy. He d3cidrd to apply for a credit card like its somehow any better but then forged the hell out of the application and I left but wow the insane lies he put that are not remotely what my life is.like he created a fantasy life on paper that is just lies. I did not realize until I walked away because I did not tell him anything of this nature so wow.

Then I saw a friend who offered more cash which I felt realllllllly shitty for because she's given me 140$ in like a week. Literally. And I can only hope she doesn't put that together cuz wow that's not good. But I didn't ask her for anything but 50 so it's less bad but not good. Not proud. I am trying though. This is the most amount of trying I've done and like I want to just be better but it's a process and I'm really learning to accept the process of getting better. It really is like daily hourly thing and I'm being mindful to take it easy because I can't do it all. Im not even ready to. But I am ready to let go of my past and my tragedy. Here's a fun tinder fact: no matter how long u talk to a person, no matter what topic if youbmention dead parents the convo almost always stops. I am literally being myself. I have no I'll will or anything like I'm being friendly and socializing and being interested in the people of the world and as soon as that drops, it's like a r3cord scratch, everyone leaves. Like am I lying? Do they think I'm making it up? Is it too heavy? Man, ppl casually drop oh I'm having dinner at mybmoms or fishing with dad but I can't even say they don't exist.

This is not a me problem. That's their problem and I'm not mad about it but it's something to know. I have to ignore this to maintain regular conversation and that sucks but I have to adapt.

I'm becoming independent from him and it's great not to be tied up emotionally in him. I love him and it's not over but I really don't care right now. I am working on me. He said today in jest that I didn't call him back like I said I would a few hours before. I didn't realize he even cared. He doesn't really but he does. He mentioned not getting a desperation text yesterday I guess because he called and I didn't actually call back. He knows I'm on tinder as well and I'm sincerely not even going to meet anyone in person but it's really harmless. I think he knows this but obviously feels some ways.

To be honest I'm not sure how to be a better partner right now. I include him in my happenings for the most part and I maintain interest in his life but he's not here and I'm honestly getting bored. Hopefully as I get better I'll find more things to occupy my time. Like if I keep trying and working on myself it'll just come to my life because it's apart of getting better. Maybe I'll paint. The mandolin was really good even if I play3d it 5 times. That really saved me and like gave me one iota of who I am. I am a wake up and do a thing person. I make it happen. And I showed myself that I could get a mandolin and play it to some d3gree. I made music with it. Very well invested 17$ to lay on the floor and play bad mandolin.

So I can do this. And maybe progress and gettingbbeter sometimes is boring. That's what makes it unappealing to the depressed. It's not super fun all the time. It's not instant happy.

I have no plans for tomorrow. I really want my bike back from my not great friends house but she's far and sucks. I don't want to hang out with her. I don't have a ton of options and I mostly hangout with her for free weed now. Not because I really want to see her. Doesn't help the boredom problem.

I do have some money and I hope my other money comes in because I'm scared to spend this now. Actually it's okay because I've spent some and can't afford easy weed. I think I'll survive with the small amounts I gather and if I do go to her house for free weed I really need to ride my bike home so maybe I won't go unless I do that but weed isn't known for its activity.

Atleast I'll have reason to go out and eat. Maybe grocery store for cat food. New pens for my journal. I wish I had my bike to go the other way even though it's probably the same distance as the normal walk. I could get better pens.

Whatever. If I wake up and get dressed it'll be great. I'm trying to take a picture a day which is easy and builds confidence and explores my early creative life passions again. I used to take great self portraits. I want to do that again but my phone really sucks. I still used to make do anyways. I'm trying to do my makeup with effort even though it's cheap shitty makeup. I look okay though. I'm not trying to hide anything but it's like putting on a mask and helps me pretend like I'm apart of the hustle too.

I do miss him.