#i love these guys and their alien cowboys aesthetic

[heilsedan]

approximately once every 6 weeks ben schneider from lord huron comes to me in my dreams to force me to re-listen to their entire discography for the millionth time. and i listen to him

#lord huron #lh supremacy #i love these guys and their alien cowboys aesthetic #im a lord huron fan first and a human second #anyway brb gonna listen to setting sun again for the eleventh time this evening

[youremyheaven]

The Absorbent Nature of Venus: An Astrological Exploration

I was inspired to make this post when I saw pictures of Bella Hadid with her new boyfriend, Adan Banuelos.

For context, Adan is a professional cowboy and Bella Hadid used to be an equestrian (she trained for the Olympics back in the day). Bella's new pictures (after a long absence from social media) feature her in all her horse girl glory. But I couldn't help but notice how Bella has a tendency to morph into her boyfriend(s).

This is not to say that she adopts a persona that is entirely alien to her, but more so that she channels one aspect of her personality and lets it take centre stage. With Adan, she is the laid-back horse girl, channelling the side of her that grew up on a farm in Santa Barbara riding horses.

Prior to this, she was dating Marc Kalman who is an art director. Idk how many of you are familiar with those "pov : you're talking to an art director at a party" reels/shorts/tiktoks but Marc fits that bill to a tee. He's the edgy, weird alternative androgynous guy and in the 2 years that Bella was with him, she morphed into a caricature of him almost.

her y2k style had a huge impact on fashion trends/pop culture but it soon kind of became a parody, as it seems a bit over the top to be wearing 25 things that do not belong together.

There was also a drastic shift in Bella's public image; she was more earnest & open; this period also saw her at her fashion nerdiest as she openly spoke about her love of finding and collecting "vintage" designer pieces from the 90s and 2000s. He was the weird edgy art director, she was the weird edgy art kid.

The only other man she dated publicly before Marc was The Weeknd and if you look at her style/persona from this period, you can see a tendency to opt for darker, grungier aesthetics. She herself has called this her "sexbot" era.

Its crazy but almost every picture of the two of them together feature both of them wearing black😂😂

This brings me to what I hope to discuss today, which is the absorbent nature of Venus.

Bella Hadid is Purvaphalguni Moon & Rising and is a Venusian. Venus is the planet of beauty, harmony, love, creativity etc. Venus exalts in Pisces ("exaltation"= it functions at its best). Pisces being a watery sign and the final sign of the zodiac is very telling in this context. Pisces is the culmination of the zodiac and contains the qualities of every preceding sign (this is why they're so chaotic lol, they have too much going on) and in water, which is where life originated, everything is at home. Pisces thus has the unique ability to find beauty in everything; water signs are known for their empathy, intuition and psychic abilities, this is because water holds the qualities of everything within it. Scientists have purported about "water memory" and water's ability to remember is linked to its natives high sensitivity, more than literal memory, its a kind of cosmic memory or inner knowing that I refer to in this context. Pisces natives tend to report psychic abilities more than any other sign in my observation and to be psychic/clairvoyant/clairsentient/claircognizant/ clairaudient is essentially to have a higher degree of empathy/sensitivity than most people. Although in some cases it may apply to tropical Pisces natives, what I'm speaking of here primarily applies to Sidereal Pisces natives.

Its easy to see how water absorbs information and retains memory but we must ponder upon why Venus, the planet of love, beauty etc exalts in a water sign and why so, in Pisces specifically. Pisces' all consuming all absorbent nature is the essential or true nature of love, beauty & harmony, to absorb, hold and possess all that there is and all that there will be, without trying to restrict it or limit it (water has no shape or form, it takes the form of whatever its poured into, pointing to the adaptability of these natives to get along with anyone or belong anywhere). Understanding love as devotion means allowing yourself to be consumed by it, it borders on religious fervour because you're losing all sense of yourself and giving your all. Its to give until you yourself are lost in it, with no sense of boundary between you & God or you and your lover (Sufi poetry extols this).

Only someone who has the ability to have this kind of all encompassing, profound divine kind of love for others, for creation, for source has the ability to connect to the ether and make art. there is a reason why the most spiritual art often tends to be abstract, there is much that cannot be expressed logically or in a straightforward way. much can be said without using language or words, some things are understood in a far more abstract way, its understood by the senses, by the subconscious, not the rational, thinking mind.

Beauty then, is the ability to perceive beyond the surface, there is nothing shallow or superficial about it, it is to understand the sum or whole of something, its essence, its core and understand its value and why its separate from the rest. True beauty then is rare but there is immense beauty all around us. Both these things are true. This is the true nature of Venus which is also the planet of refinement, it sees value in things that are unpolished, raw and original wholly but also in what is practiced, deliberate and refined. Venus is a planet of immense contradictions as the themes associated with the planet itself are contradictory in nature. To know or experience love, beauty, creativity etc one must also be well acquainted with its opposite. There's no middle ground and there's nothing lukewarm, you have to go all in. To understand and appreciate beauty truly, one must face brutal ugliness, to know the nature of creativity or to access it, you must first experience the lack of it. Its out of nothingness that things manifest but this means nothingness must first be experienced.

Sorry to have gone off on a tangent (me with everything I post lol) but its important to understand the nature of Venus in this specific context because its not the other attributes that makes Venus so absorbent of others influence. Its such a creative energy for the same reason, it absorbs and is influenced by absolutely everything. However, it can be hard for Venusian natives to feel as though they have a strong sense of self.

Granted that the "self" is an illusory concept and we are all an amalgam of numerous influences (people, places, culture, literature etc), Venusian natives are more susceptible to lacking true individuality since they absorb projections far too easily. This is also why Venusians are so highly desirable. You can always tell when someone's Venusian or has an exalted Venus, they are projected onto HEAVILY by others, but by having desire projected onto them, they become more desirable. We fall in love with the reflections we see in others and dislike those who project our shadows (this is literally a Jungian concept, v fascinating pls look it up). Venus inspires others to project unattainability, mystery, romance, beauty and desire and the more they see it, the more it manifests.

However this has its pitfalls. Without solid grounding, Venusians turn into chameleons who are constantly morphing into their environment; they are known for their hospitality and pleasing demeanour because of their innate ability to pick up on these cues and behave accordingly. Bella Hadid herself is self admittedly a "people pleaser" (Venusian natives struggle with this a lot).

What does it mean to not have a solid sense of self and constantly be serving as a mirror to others?

We see Bella's shifting style/demeanour/persona with every boyfriend. There is rather embarrassing clip of her speaking with a French accent (juxtaposed against an old clip of her using AAVE). Venusians are more prone to picking up accents/emulating the behaviour of those around them.

The Venusian tendency to absorb can extend to picking up accents, mannerisms, style, self-presentation, persona etc it can sometimes be very superficial but in some cases natives immerse themselves in it so deeply than they live their lives under the guise of a pseudo persona borrowed from someone else.

This video of Bella is a good example. If you've watched her in other videos you'll know that she does not usually speak/present herself this way. If you watch this video of Carla Bruni also discussing her iconic looks (it came out in the same year 2021, several months before Bella did hers) you can see how Bella is emulating Carla in her video.

Now its quite well known that Bella Hadid "copied" Carla Bruni's face through plastic surgery. This is what I mean by some Venusian natives taking the absorption thing too far. We imitate the things we want to embody/what we're inspired by, Venus is a planet of constant refinement/self improvement, while its good to be inspired by people we look up to, it does not bode well for one to embody them completely, stripping yourself of your own identity. This is also why Venus in 12h (Pisces) is said to be illusory. Its hard for these natives to discern what love really is, since their natural inclination is to simply embrace things at face value. This is why they are susceptible to abusive and toxic relationships, simply because they are blinded by their own loving nature and cannot see the faults in their lovers even when its plainly obvious to others (think Bella & The Weeknd).

Let us look at Miss Ariana Grande. She has Mars in Bharani atmakaraka.

Ariana has gone from baby voiced teen star to blackfishing r&b singer to vaguely asian looking in the span of her career.

She's also changed her voice, speaking style & mannerisms MANY times.

I don't think enough people talk about how Miss Grande essentially stole Victoria Monet's mannerisms, voice tone, speaking style etc

Ariana essentially emulated this woman and that was her at the peak of her career. She's to Ariana what Carla Bruni is to Bella.

Its really unfortunate that Ariana changes races every few years like they're a passing fad and this is a really unfortunate manifestation of her Venusian influence.

Her Venusian influence is also really obvious in her music, especially her Bharani Mars because her music is very sensual but also straight up crass and horny, there's also a tendency for her to use revenge-y themes (break up with your gf im bored?? yes, and??)

Claire Nakti had spoken about how this purple blue-y iridescent esque lighting is very Venusian and consistently used in films by Venus natives. I found this true of Ariana's stage sets/design when she's on tour.

god is a woman is a very Venusian coded song/music video, from the colour palette to the Yonic imagery at display.

Brad Pitt is a male Bella Hadid in the sense that he has a tendency to morph into his girlfriends. He went from Cali stoner surfer guy when married to Jennifer to humanitarian serious filmmaker when he was with Angelina. He likes to switch up his persona based on his partner at the moment. He has a Purvashada Stellium (Mercury, Mars & Ketu)

Johnny Depp is known for his broadly European/British accent despite the fact that he's from Kentucky/Florida. He's a Purvashada Moon

Madonna is another celebrity who is notorious for her fake accent. She lived in England briefly after marrying the British director Guy Ritchie and spoke with a British accent.

Many have accused Madonna of being a wannabe Angelina Jolie when she started to focus on humanitarian work & adopted several children in the mid 2000s. She is a Purvaphalguni Moon and Rising.

Camille Rowe (Purvashada stellium; sun, mercury and saturn) is often accused of having a fake French accent as she mostly grew up in America.

Hilaria Baldwin (Purvashada sun) is infamous for pretending to be Spanish, speaking with a fake Spanish accent and giving her numerous children Spanish names despite the fact that she's a plain old white woman.

Austin Butler is by now infamous for speaking like Elvis (he's now working with a coach to lose his Elvis accent lmao), he has Mars in Purvaphalguni as his amatyakaraka.

Lindsay Lohan (Bharani Moon, Mars in Purvashada amatyakaraka) has also switched accents and often spoke with an Arabic accent and has had an on & off relationship with Islam. Its unclear whether she's still practicing the faith but at one point she did convert. I do not mean to ridicule someone's faith or use it as an example of Venusian persona switching but a lot of Hollywood celebrities have a tendency to experiment with Eastern religions/traditions/culture like its some trend or fad and drop it when they lose interest. I do not have enough information to make a clear judgement but LiLo has had an unstable public image to say the least. I sincerely hope she is peaceful and safe.

John Malkovich is another celebrity who passes off as a European even though he's from mid-western America. He has a hard to place accent. He is Purvaphalguni Rising

Aishwarya Rai is known in India for being fake or "plastic" (I'm Indian) she has an unnatural non-Indian accent despite the fact that she's lived in India her whole life. She is a Purvashada Moon.

Numerous celebrities whose public image/persona is incongruent or at odds with their real personality also tend to have major Venus influence in their chart.

Charlie Chaplin is the father of slapstick comedy and is very well known by the persona he created for himself but irl he has been described as "sadistic" (by Marlon Brando and others) and he's known to have been a terrible person all over (multiple teen wives, abusive to his children among other things). He has Bharani Venus conjunct Mars and Jupiter in Purvashada conjunct Ketu

Elisabeth Moss is known for having played several iconic feminist characters but irl she's a scientologist. She has Ketu in Purvashada

This absorptive quality of Venus can also manifest positively. Meryl Streep, Bharani Moon is known for her uncanny ability to do just about any accent and completely blend into her character.

I will add more examples as I find them but for now this is it!! If you think of any others do let me know!!<33

#vedic astrology #vedic astro notes #sidereal astrology #astrology notes #astrology observations #astroblr #nakshatras #astro observations #astro notes #astrology #Youtube

[isagrimorie]

I really love House of R's breakdown of the Ahsoka show. Listening to the breakdown I like their point that maybe the reason for the gap in knowledge about Ahsoka and Sabine's relationship is that this is a mystery that both old fans and new watchers would see together.

I do think we will get flashbacks to the moments of Ahsoka first taking on Sabine as an apprentice to the end why she walked away from Sabine.

Another thing I realized about the table setting in the first two episodes is that they're setting up that Ahsoka show might be set more in the unknown regions outside of their current galaxy.

I actually like that we're getting more into different lore for Ahsoka, more alien, more mystic and that by going to the Unknown Regions we might get to avoid the oft criticism about 'always returning to Tatooine'.

But most of all, I love that we might be exploring different kinds of Force Users, and the show might end up touching on an ancient society that predates both the Night Sisters and the Jedi/Sith.

But also speaking of Lore, I love how Baylon Skoll and Shin Hati were named after the two wolves from Norse mythology.

Skoll is the name of the wolf Who follows the shining priest Into the desolate forest, And the other is Hati, Hróðvitnir’s son, Who chases the bright bride of the sky

= the Eddic poem Grímnismál

And that Morgan Elspeth is a confirmed Night Sister. Night Sisters of Dathomir are often called Witches because of how the Night Sisters utilize the Force like magic.

In the Clone Wars, Grevious massacred the Night Sisters.

Ahsoka's had dealings with a Night Sister before -- Asajj Ventress and Darth Maul and Savage Oppres were also from Dathomir.

But also, Shin seems to have some reservations about Morgan after she learns Morgan is a Night Sister.

I also love the sense that Ahsoka is more mystical and science fantasy than the other shows. This show doesn't shy away that it's about space wizards and space knights.

Sometimes I feel current Star Wars (and some fans) are ashamed that Star Wars is basically a show about sword and sorcery but in space.

I also really like that if The Mandalorian is a Space Western, Ahsoka is very much the Space Wizard Samurai and Din's aesthetic (or the Mandos in the Mandalorian) is more like Space Cowboys and Vikings, Sabine represents the Japanese-flavored aesthetic of her part of Mandalore.

But also I love that the lead character is the grumpy samurai master, usually in anime/manga we see stories more from the point of view of the student seeking the master to teach them once again.

Very much borrowing from the influences of Samurai movies. Also, Kanan has done this (in other Western media-- Zuko and Iroh from Avatar and Korra from Legend of Korra).

For both Kanan and Sabine, this signifies commitment -- Sabine has mentioned before that she kept her hair short because it helps her wear her Mandalorian helmet.

Sabine letting her hair grow long meant she has set aside her Mandalorian heritage, she's been in a holding pattern, possibly since the day Mandalore fell (again). It's possibly another reason why Sabine is so reluctant to celebrate.

Yes, she helped save Lothal but what does that matter if she couldn't even save her own homeworld?

Almost every character in this show lost their families, their home worlds, and their people.

I also like how Ahsoka the show is also about the Good guys winning the war, they've all been busy fighting the war that now there's peace what do Ahsoka, a soldier who has been fighting since she was a child, and Sabine, a child who is from a culture that reveres war and warriors, do now?

Hera is the only one with a clear idea of what she wants to do -- and that's to build a better world and tomorrow for her son.

But for Ahsoka and Sabine?

I feel like Ahsoka and Sabine's theme music is Wait for It:

Life doesn't discriminate Between the sinners and the saints It takes and it takes and it takes And we keep living anyway We rise and we fall and we break And we make our mistakes And if there's a reason I'm still alive When so many have died Then I'm willin' to— Wait for it...

#thinky thoughts #ahsoka 1x01 #ahsoka 1x02 #ahsoka tano #sabine wren #baylan skoll #shin hati #morgan elspeth #night sister #ahsoka spoilers #star wars ahsoka #Youtube

[knizuu]

How do you come up with color palettes?

Ooh this is great to ask!!! When I make a color palette, It’s like I have a secret template

*Or in general, I choose what’s pleasing to the eye

For some reason, I’ve been so used to using certain colors together, that it has been staying this way :>

^ With this, it’s all purples, pinks, and yellows (+orange) ALL OF IT LMAO, it’s just shown in different designs :] (yknow, with some including blue tones)

^ This bunch is more based on: Cold colors/black is surrounded by bright/light color Most of them are surrounded by blues or greens, some having pink or yellow be accents (I really love pink and yellow if you couldn’t tell XD) And the ones with red only counts because it’s bringing up the eyes (like the rest) with bright color

*With that note: after learning how design can peak with the focus of eyes, I really try to use a bright or unused color for em :>

^ These lovely guys follow the aesthetic of things, most having brown or reds because of the theming

1 // Cowboy/Town aesthetic - usually browns with natural color (or versions of reddish pinks)

2 // Basically any theme - colors that fit the word (EX: alien - blacks with muted blues, Warrior - blues and greens)

^ All based on one palette: Blue/Green/Teal, Reds/pinks, and with solid dark blues

I don’t remember the name of it anymore, but I learned it years ago :]

And that’s kinda it! I usually (unknowingly) make a design with one of these color choices. And to answer “how?”, I think of what’s pleasing to view.

It ain’t a surprise I follow to complimentary colors, bright purple/blue tones, emotional colors with lighting, or based on setting palettes.

+I love choosing purple to shade or light :>

#Note #art #my art <3 #my art

[space-city-traffic]

yet again im back on my bullshit so... (gazes with mixed feelings at the TV show Firefly) i could fix him.

my extremely long thoughts about my Own Personal Good Version of Firefly (with plenty of spoilers for the show and the movie) under the cut:

things that are getting axed first thing no question:

out with the whole “let’s add in a thin veneer of Chinese cultural aesthetics out of context for ~flavor~” deal. just no.

instead, let’s hire some actors from a bunch of different cultures and work with them to figure out how their characters would bring those cultures into space with them!! and also hopefully bring some experiences with immigration/alienation/travel into it, since the Whole Core of Firefly is about how humanity always brings our doomed and silly and stubborn and unique warmth with us even into the cold void where nothing is familiar or homey in the slightest.

let’s respect our sex worker character shall we?

i do appreciate that Inara’s work as a companion is described as legitimate and well respected in the show. however please stop having your captain and hero call her a wh*re every five seconds against her clearly expressed wishes and portraying this as just a totally acceptable thing

let’s be more respectful of our characters of color and also have some more diversity, shall we?

others have put it better than me but yeah, the way Zoe and Book are treated is very uncomfy, and the rest of the show is depressingly monochromatic. come on let’s do better.

stop the weird confederacy hat tips

again others have pointed these out with much more thoroughness than I could, but the names of some characters and locations, as well as some of the language used to describe the browncoats, has uncomfortably confederate vibes. instead i propose we very Clearly tip our hats to the Alliance equaling space capitalism instead! you can’t go wrong with space capitalism as a villain.

don’t! make! the! psychotic! character! violent!

listen i love River Tam with my whole heart. but you should absolutely not portray your only character with psychosis as violent because of that psychosis!!!!!!! and yeah, a huge part of her character is that her brain got fucked up by the alliance and so she hallucinates and is also a super ninja. but like. she doesn’t need to be a super ninja for her character to work, okay? the crew does not need to be scared of her for her character to work, okay??? more on this later bc it would take a lot of care and nuance to make her character work but i really think it can be done

things we are absolutely keeping:

found family tropes my fucking beloved

this should be self evident. this is why the show is as appealing as it is despite its flaws, at least in my eyes.

malcolm reynolds, the knight in dusty armor

there’s something so appealing to me about what Mal stands for. because at his core is this ridiculous, silly, stubborn, doomed devotion to what he thinks is important and right, a romantic idealism thinly covered by cynical cowboy platitudes that he thinks make his bleeding heart totally invisible. and he is so obvious and entirely incorrect. bless. this is a man who will do anything for his family, who charges into swordfights to defend his friend from a man who wants to turn her into an object despite having no clue how to hold a sword. at his worst, he starts brawls in bars just for the martyr’s thrill of being persecuted for supporting the right; at his best, he inspires downright religious belief from his crew because he represents a romantic and chivalrous and doomed dedication to the right thing over any practical concerns. and then he throws a “selfish” quip over it with 100% confidence that everyone fell for his clever distraction and believes him to be a dirtbag. he’s oblivious and ridiculous and god he makes me want to be a better person because he’s just so goddamned sincere. stupid, but sincere. 10/10 himbo. <3

Mal and Inara ultraslowburn friends to enemies to friends to lovers to enemies to friends to lovers to friends to...

there’s nothing i love more than a ship that’s just two people who know each other way too well, and they’re each the only one who knows the other well enough to call them out on their bullshit. the way Mal and Inara interact in the show sometimes makes me uncomfy but like. the core of their relationship has to stay.

space western aesthetic

i need the cows on a spaceship scene to stay like i need air okay

that sweet sweet religious shit

mal, who lost his faith in gd and a whole lot else during the war. who lost his faith in himself, and now feels he has to hide the part of him that still wants to be good, because he knows he can’t be anymore, and he feels like it’s embarrassing for a guy like him to want something so unattainable. who takes a preacher on board, and the preacher has lost something, too. the preacher has his own past, and his own questions. but not questions like the observant neurodivergent girl, the one who wants to interact with and understand this thing that’s so important to him, but it just doesn’t click with how her brain works and she feels like something needs to be fixed, either the Bible or herself. and Mal takes care of them all, and slowly, he begins to find gd again, not in a prayer but in humanity. humanity doesn’t need to be fixed, like the alliance thinks. the shining imperfect strawberry sweetness of it in his family’s smiles is something to be worshiped and served and devoted to. and he finds he has something to believe in again. (and his crew find that he’s given them someone to believe in, too. and maybe suddenly he’s a saint.)

and finally, my brilliant ideas as to what i would like to add:

TRANS WOMAN KAYLEE RIGHTS

listen her femininity is so important to me okay? it’s so thrilled about everything that’s pretty, from dresses to the spaceship’s electric innards, and it’s so non-traditional and grease stained until it’s not and it’s pink and ruffly and twirly, and she never sees any of it as a contradiction, because none of it contradicts, it’s all just her! her gender is warmth and love and prettiness, feeling pretty and appreciating the pretty and making her friends’ days pretty too.

i want us to find out she’s trans in that episode with the ball, and i want us to find out alongside Mal who just never asked or never realized. Kaylee gasps and squeals at the dress in the shop window and Mal makes an off handed, ill considered comment, and then... someone yanks him aside and hisses a few very significant words in his ear. and suddenly he remembers what the blue white and pink she painted all over the engine room means, and he knows he has something to make right. so he buys her that dress himself and lets her know just how pretty she looks, and when he walks into that ball with her displayed on his arm like something precious, he looks the proudest out of any man there. and she notices. for a few seconds, of course, until there’s chocolate, and ‘nara, and a chandelier—and some horrible girls, but she’s used to that, until—suddenly, she finds her people. a group of old men who light up when she jokes about compression coils and whack presumptuous boys who ask her to dance. they adopt her as a treasured granddaughter, and Mal is beaming at her like a proud dad, and she finds that one of her new elderly friends gazes a little too long at her bracelet, and so she gives it to xem and teaches xem a few new words, and... it’s a good day, huh? it’s a really good day. (of course, then the captain has to go and punch somebody in the face, but it was a real nice party up until then.)

also she and Simon are both transhet t4t im correct and you know it

time for a better River Tam

the first thing we’ve established is that this version of her is not unpredictably violent and the crew is not scared of her!!!! it makes no sense to take a kid who’s primarily brilliant, experiment on her brain, give her telepathic powers....... and tack on the fact that she also has super strength and speed and dexterity and what not, AND say that they programmed her to be super violent. no! no. not only is that extremely harmful rep, that’s also just stupid.

instead!! my version of River is in fact not terrifying to the crew, but is actually the one they feel safest around. River has always been totally blunt, she was one of those kids you could tell realllllly early was autistic, and she doesn’t like being disengenous at all. so you can always trust her to tell the truth and not play weird passive aggressive games or have any hidden agenda, which makes her just a really chill person to be around. also, one of her longtime special interests is music and dance, so whether or not she’s nonverbal on a given day, there will always be some sort of beautiful sound when she’s around. she does have the singing voice of a dying crow unfortunately but that’s ok bc Simon’s is even worse and they’re both incredibly competitive so you’ll at least get free entertainment out of the affair.

my version of River does have psychosis and hallucinations because of the trauma of the experiments, and they are really troubling to her. she and Simon work together to find ways to cope and meds that help, and it’s a process, but there are some things that help.

the only thing she gained from the academy was the ability to hear people’s thoughts and sense the future a little bit. and yeah, that led to her picking up a few spooky secrets at the beginning, which, yikes. and for a while, it was hard to figure out which voices were real and which were hallucinations. but around her friends, she always feels safe to ask “did you just think about triple cheese burritos or was that just a me thing?”, and they’ll always tell her the truth no matter how embarrassing their thoughts are, bc it’s important to all of them to respect her and help her sort accurately through what’s reality and what’s not. and bit by bit, she gets better and better at figuring out what kinds of things tend to be telepathy and what kinds of things tend to be psychosis, and that each one feels a little different. and because of the trust and respect and support of her found family she’s able to do that in a safe environment!!!

trans man Simon rights

listen i wanted to keep him as just a side note on Kaylee’s list but he is my son and he’s important to my heart so here goes

out on the outer rim where Kaylee’s from, gender ain’t much of a big deal, there’s an individualistic quality to life out there, and so if the trail you blaze is the trail of a woman or a man or neither or both, that’s respected even in the rare cases where it’s not outright encouraged. but in the inner planets, where competition and connections and public faces and family names are everything, you have to be what’s expected of you to survive. you can’t change your brand, you can’t be anything other than what your family planned for you since before you were born, it’s incredibly hard to survive in such a hyper competitive environment, and so your very identity becomes just a tool in how to market yourself for better success.

needless to say Simon (just as autistic as his little sister and also very trans) fuckin hated it there. but he was very good at it. correction: he was very good at his very specific field of STEM, good enough to where people stopped talking about how cute he looked in bows and started talking about how impressive his work was from a very young age. and his work had no gender. he could be whatever he wanted to in equations. so that was where he could express himself, and gd, he got so much praise for it, he never wanted to stop.

not until he discovered that his sister needed him, and ran away, and needed a disguise, and realized... suddenly, every stifling rule and prying eye was a million miles away. he was freefloating, freefalling, with none of the charted paths he’d been following all his life... so you know what? fuck it. he’s always enjoyed the name Simon. and since it’s not on any legal records, it’ll make him just that much more untraceable.

and on Serenity, starting over with new people who never knew him before his transition feels like an unbelievable blessing that just dropped right into his lap. he has to keep up the secrecy, he has to make sure they never find out who he used to be, because gd, it’s so nice when they look at him and say his name right, and he doesn’t know if he can handle losing that, not when it’s so new and so important to the person he’s finally becoming. but then one day, the unthinkable happens, the wanted posters for his arrest have an old name on them, they’re looking for the Tam sisters, and... nothing changes. the crew of Serenity could not give even a tenth of a percent of a fuck, and it doesn’t seem like they even know they’re supposed to. huh. that’s new. Simon could get used to that, he thinks.

i’m sure there’s more i could add, but it’s 4:30 in the morning now, so if more occurs to me, ill simply add it in a reblog tomorrow. if you’ve read down this far, i am in love with you. please let me know your Better Firefly ideas, too, bc im always down to yell about this show!!!

#firefly #Serenity #in which i choke out joss whedon with my bare hands and rescue his characters and give them better homes #ollies fix it series #malcolm reynolds #ollies personal good firefly canon

[kinetic-elaboration]

September 1: 3x06 Spectre of the Gun

Okay so, it might be a little early to declare myself a S3 apologist, since there are still a lot of eps I’ve never seen, but I feel like I’m pretty close..

This ep was so good!! Honestly I think it’s one of my faves. And perfect to usher in Spooky Season.

Honestly, this show really is my happy place. Just all the characters together on the bridge, on some kinda adventure, looking at weird space buoys and investigating stuff.

Again, this buoy looks like a Windows 98 screensaver.

Kirk keeps referring to Spock as “Science Officer.” Is he mad at him? Full of some particularly intense longing that requires him to put extra distance between them?

Excuse me, you address US as aliens? YOU’RE the aliens.

Hmmm, so it seems they’re not friendly.

It’s addressing them in different languages!!! I love it. Love the reminder that Uhura’s first language is not English,also.

“True telepaths are dangerous.” As opposed to fake telepaths like Vulcans lol?

The Melkotians withdrew immediately. They invented space travel, they saw space, and they said “not for us” and they turned around and left. McCoy would like them; they’d have a lot to gripe about together.

The welcome mat is NOT out.

“Unlike Mr. Scott’s transporter, this unit is not functioning.”

It legit looked like Spock put his hand on Kirk’s back there. Like he clearly raises it, but not far enough to be seen above Kirk, so like.. what was the point? Where did it go?

LEE CRONIN--oh no, flashbacks lol.

“We come in peace”--immediately pulls out gun.

I should have watched this when writing my Western fic.

Just bits and pieces of a Western town... and a completely red sky...

The guns are “crude but dangerous.” If only Sulu were here; he’d love this.

An announcement with a specific time and place on it--that’s a very precise detail to just pull from their minds. Must have come from Kirk’s, that nerd. Maybe Spock. But probably Kirk.

“Because my ancestors pioneered the American frontier.” I mean did they really get to the frontier? Or just... the Midwest?

Maybe it’s actually because he’s a cowboy at heart?

Aliens using his own ancestral sins as the pattern for his own death for breaking their law IS a great (possibly partially unintended) idea. Oh also, if they think that Kirk and co. are here to ‘tame’ or colonize them, then the Western setting makes even more sense--you’re no different from your ancestors, you came somewhere new and brought lawlessness and violence and death, but not this time!

Can you believe Kirk knows all of these details about the OK Corral? NERD.

Spock is so proud of himself for knowing the phrase “had it out.” Look, I used slang correctly!

These are some creative aliens.

“We know death is real here.” Or is it? They’re literally telepaths guys.

Hmmm, this building doesn’t need a roof I think. - The aliens probably

Can’t believe Scotty thinks his usual is his actual usual lol. You’re going to drink bourbon and like it!

Kirk and Spock look so good together.

They’re obviously Chekov’s disapproving parents.

“The day is still young, Ensign.” I don’t remember the exact context of this but Spock is SO judgmental.

What is Kirk doing? This guy is a hallucination; he won’t be convinced by touching some cloth. There’s nothing to convince! He’s only a Concept.

“Have you seen clothes like this?” / “Yes.” / “Where?” / “On the Claytons!” Comedy gold.

Kirk really thinks he can charm his way out of anything. Hmmm, maybe if I just talk nicely to the Earps, they won’t kill us.

“In small amounts, it [bourbon] was considered medicinal.” Lol.

Scotty is becoming a bourbon guy!

“Mr. Chekov is inVOLVed” lol. Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

“A lot of people and things have tried to kill me.” No need to brag.

THAT’S how you make a city limits sign. Put a dead animal skull on top. I live quite close to a city limits sign and I think it could use a cow skull.

Western Cossacks!!

Poisonous snakes and cactus plants. That really distills the Aesthetic down to its core.

This is a good Kirk episode. He’s really being a good Captain: coming up with different ideas, being creative, pushing his crew to brainstorm.

Bones and his tranqs again.

Bones meets his old nemesis: Old Timey Medicine.

Why was Doc Holiday just...chilling in his own dentist chair? (My mom suggested: power nap. Let’s go with that. Power nap + ability for optimally dramatic entrance.)

Also I can’t believe McCoy just goes into this guy’s practice and starts helping himself to all the serious drugs.

Chekov definitely isn’t the marrying kind.

RIP Chekov.

Bones does not sound very sympathetic here. Jim, get over it, he just died, whatever.

And then two seconds later he turns around and tells Spock he’s not sad enough! You can’t win.

“We all knew the risk when we joined the service.”

“My feelings are not a subject for discussion.” !!!!!!! This line!!

“You worked closely with him.” Yes! Chekov is his protege!

“Bones, Scotty, stop bullying Spock.” <-- not an actual quote but it might as well be.

If this were AOS, Spock would already be choking Bones out.

Whoops, no one told Chekov he wasn’t supposed to die!

“Let’s organize! Let’s form an anti-Earp union!”

“I can’t kill them!” he says in a mad rage.

I mean, it is important, though. That’s not what he does.

Kirk is /disgusted/ by lawlessness and frontier justice. What a Rebel TM.

I feel like Bones was waiting for the gotcha moment when Spock compliments him. “Saying nice things about me? That’s not how this relationship works!”

“Nothing can go wrong.” / “Up to now, everything has gone wrong.” He has a point.

That pause before Spock admitted it hasn’t been tested lol--they don’t want to admit it.

“[The bourbon’s] for the pain.” / “But this is painless.” / “You should have told me that before.” The unexpected comedy stylings of Scotty and Spock.

It doesn’t work--guess Spock’s got to take back that compliment now.

“Captain, you don’t understand--they’ve been telepaths the whole time which we already knew!”

“We’re not going to move from the spot.” * is immediately in a different spot * Well I mean at least he’s trying. He’s doing his best!

Love the OK Corral sign also. Weirdly creepy. With its accompanying horse.

Spock doesn’t have any hips for the holster to rest on.

“What did Chekov die of?” / “A piece of lead in his body.” That would do it.

If the tranquilizer should have been effective, does that mean Scotty is actually passed out right now?

Honestly, this is all so spooky. TRUE Western Horror Ghost Vibes.

Also very trippy. If you don’t believe it... it’s not real... some kinda weird chicken and the egg argument regarding our belief in the truth of physical laws idk but it sounds good. Spock brings it home.

Even with the wind whipping around him, Kirk is SO in love. His absolutely adoring expression... So soft...

“Very well, Sir, I’ll meld with you again. Not that I particularly want to. It will be a sacrifice. But I’ll manage. Even though you’re such a dynamic individual haha ha I’m fine I’m cool.”

I feel like Scotty is NOT into the mind meld. He looks terrified. Maybe he should have saved the bourbon for this occasion.

I know the mind meld is supposed to be a replacement for on screen hypnotism...but is this not hypnotism? Like even more than past uses? In this case, Spock is leaving them with suggestions that he wants to continue AFTER the meld, as opposed to, like, efficiently sharing information or giving immediate suggestions. And the scenes themselves are very creepy and...hypnotic.

Kirk’s patented move: WHOLE BODY ATTACK.

Well, we wrapped that up right quick.

Did they... never actually leave the bridge? Or even navigate past the buoy? This actually brings up a lot of questions as to when the aliens started the hallucinations, what their bodies looked like to the rest of the crew, and how they woke up--since there’s obviously been a bit of a time skip, as Bones is already examining Chekov.

Lol at Chekov, saved by horniness. “Nothing but the girl was real to him.”

“A vast alliance of fellow creatures who all believe in the same thing...”

Kirk’s vision of the utopian future is so powerful, he’s effectively gotten the welcome mat put back out.

A personal question? Kirk is intrigued.

Ah, but it’s just another excuse for Spock to be a hypocrite--how did humans survive? How did VULCANS survive? And for the show to remind us of its utopian vision of the future... we will move past violence, we will prove ourselves attractive to and worth of new alien friends.

Then McCoy walks out so Kirk and Spock can have their Moment. He undoubtedly knows what’s up.

So this ep was shown one day before the anniversary of the shootout at the OK Corral AND on Halloween week. It is very much a spooky season episode. So surreal and strange. Ghostly.

I know using sets rather than on location shoots, and not even building whole sets, was a budgetary issue but tbqh I think it worked in the ep’s favor. It added to the alien feeling of it and was an accidentally creative way of showing that these images were pulled from Kirk’s mind.

This felt like a very Classic S1-ish ep to me. I think it’s because Kirk was foregrounded as the Captain/hero and we get to see not just his intelligence and creativity and leadership but also his compassion and his moral core. He IS the values of the series, personified, and that was clear here.

But we also got to see lots of him and Spock, casually working as a pair, and the use of the rest of the landing party crew was very deft also. I loved that there was time to mock Chekov’s horniness, to talk about Spock and Chekov’s professional relationship, to joke around with Scotty, to show more of the Spock and Bones dynamic.

Again, great sci fi concept. I think this would have been another possible inspo for my Pirate AU if I’d seen it in time (although I think I picked a good mission-concept ultimately). I’m fascinated by the Melkotians: who are they? What do they really look like? Do they communicate any other way but telepathically? Are they corporeal? What is their planet like? And most importantly, what experience lead them to be so isolationist? They specifically refer to the aliens as “disease” coming into their home. And it’s when Kirk shows himself to be fundamentally nonviolent even in the face of his own death, they let the Enterprise through.

Basically, I always enjoy hints of alien societies that bring up more questions for me than answers. I love speculating about it.

The next two eps I’ve seen and remember well and I know they’re classics. I’m really looking forward to them!

#the year 2021 #2021: fandom thoughts #2021: star trek #star trek tos

[ober-affen-geil]

My Roswell Rewatch liveblog

Episode 2x04 AKA In Which Parent-Child Relationships Kill Me Dead

GO OFF ROY

SANDERS YOU LITTLE SHIT

god all this stuff with tripp is so....trippy

how much of that was roy and how much was nora healing her

also i know it would have blown out their budget but would have loved to see how this worked

YES KYLE, WHAT PART OF GENIUS DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND

fucking iconic scene

love those mugs actually

graham fucking green everyone, gotta love his panache

maybe not to you isobel, i prefer me some taste over presentation

LOOK I LOVE KYLE AND HIS MOM A LOT OK

michael god fucking dammit is it possible for you to wait in a way that doesnt scream cowboy silhouette aesthetic

YES IT DOES DEPEND OF COPIOUS NOTES AND WE HAVE THE PROOF IN MY ARCHIVE BLESS THIS EPISODE DOES SO MUCH FOR MY PROFESSION NOT EVEN KIDDING BUCKLE UP Y’ALL

also big fan of michael laughing like a little kid

“YOU COULD FILL A WHOLE SERIES” HGFJGHSGKDGS NOT SUBTLE

oh uck ick i forgot about this scene gross just fucking shoot him cam

AUGH ARTURO I LOVE YOU

*crying*

PANCAKE PAPI ARTURO I LOVE YOU

this hurt, like a lot. poor kyle

roy you smooth son of a bitch

dammit alex why you gotta come for me like that

also then BAM right in the feels. TWICE FUCK

“ALIEN GUY” AND “NAZI GUY” IS THE SINGLE BEST FUCKING CHARACTER INTRODUCTION AND I WILL DIE ON THAT HILL

MY ARCHIVIST HEART IS LIVING FORREST IN YOUR DAMN CARDIGAN AND SNEAKERS FUCK

poor kyle

“of course you’re afraid of me i murdered you” OOF

“fought in two wars” ok so is charlie military or fucking not cus shes now working on a private security firm so that tells me shes out now at least

“my fight is over” bull fucking shit it is

poor arturo

this is the part where you apologize liz

kyle i love you

THE COMIC TIMING ON THAT “BEER” FUCKING KILLS ME OMG

“interesting historical footnote” forrest i love you

poor michael

ALSO KYLE AND HIS MOM PLEASE I LOVE IT

no she didn’t you ass thats why she asked

“you deserve good things mom” AUGH

poor alex

*sobbing*

gotta say though i love nora’s look here

yeah standing that close to the barn would not have been survivable

AUGH ALEX

why do you think steph lol

noooo cam

the repetition of this song here is good

i feel. squicky about this. but it is pretty much the only reasonable way this could have worked. i think i would feel better if religion was addressed on this show like, at all, in more than throwaway lines tbh. little more sensitivity would be nice.

“get over yourself” ISOBEL YOU’RE ONE TO TALK

OH FUCK IT WAS A DEER NOT A COW I TOTALLY THOUGHT IT WAS A COW

“great things. terrible, but great” seems APPLICABLE HERE

i do also like kyles reference to waiting room earlier bargaining and then isobel doing exactly that here

ooh spooky

#roswell season 2 #roswell new mexico #rnm #my roswell rewatch #list #a riley special

[freddiesaysalright]

Catching Up Part III

A Joe Mazzello x Reader Fic

Summary: Reader is a writer for an entertainment news network and after Joe comes in to do an interview, they reconnect.

Word Count: 1.7K (sorry it’s so short! I mostly needed to set up for the next chapters)

Tag List: @crazylittlethingcalledobsession @jennyggggrrr @somethinginthewayiam @grandaddy-roger-trash @rogerloveshiscar @hopefully-aesthetically-pleasing If you’d like to be added, let me know!

A/N: I really don’t know yet how many parts there are gonna be. I know what the story is but however long it ends up is just whatever at this point.

Part I  Part II 

Part 3 here we go!!!

You prepared to go out with Joe for the second night in a row, but just before you left work, you texted Christy that you’d be out late. She sent a smiley face in return and then an eggplant emoji with a question mark. You sent back one with rolling eyes, since that was exactly what you were doing.

Joe met you in the lobby on the ground floor of the building. He smiled at you and you felt your heart skip a beat at the sight. You ran up to him, leaping into his arms and wrapping your legs around his waist. He caught you and spun you around before setting you down.

“I’m happy to see you, too,” he said as you settled back on your feet.

“What are we doing tonight?” you wondered.

“I thought we’d do a little dance...make a little love...basically, get down tonight,” he said.

You laughed. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I did actually find a place to go dancing and thought we could hang out there,” he said.

“Lead the way, Romeo.”

He took your hand and you walked to the bar. You chatted animatedly about work, and he told you the things he and the guys had done in the city that day. You told him you’d seen some of that on Instagram.

“You follow me on Instagram?” he wondered.

“Of course!”

He whipped his phone out. “What’s your handle, I need to follow you back.”

You told him, and you heard your phone ping in your purse to alert you to a new follower.

Finally, you arrived at the place. It looked so nice. It wasn’t a club - it was more elegant than that. But clearly people came there to dance. Only to a woman playing the piano and singing, with a sax player to accompany her instead of a DJ. It felt so old fashioned and cool.

He grabbed a table and you put your things down. He asked the couple next to you if they would watch your things and they nodded, so he took your hand and led you out to the dance floor. His arm wrapped around your waist. Yours came to his shoulder. Your free hands clasped and he began to lead you.

“Where’d you learn to dance so divinely?” you asked.

“My parents,” he said with a small smile. “They danced together all the time.”

“How sweet,” you said.

“You know, my mom actually used to tease me about my crush on you,” he told you.

“That’s funny,” you replied. “My mom used to tease me about my crush on you.”

“You’re kidding!” he joked.

You giggled. “I can’t believe you had a crush on me.”

“I know, it’s embarrassing,” he said, laughing.

You playfully hit him on the shoulder. “Shut up! I just mean that...I dunno, you were so out there and comfortable and fun. And I was this awkward little weirdo who wrote stories about cowboys and aliens.”

“Those were fun,” he insisted.

“Joe, tell me something.”

“Anything.”

“Why did you ask me out? Just for old times’ sake?”

He shook his head. “Nah. I mean, I was sure I recognized you when I saw you in the newsroom, and then when Don said your name, it just confirmed it. But I was attracted to you right away. I mean, even if we hadn’t known each other before, I would have noticed you across that room. I would notice you in any room.”

Your cheeks went pink and you were thankful for the low light.

The song changed to Henry Mancini’s “Moon River” and you grinned so wide you wondered how your face could contain it.

“This is my favorite song!” you gasped.

“I can tell!” Joe said with a light chuckle.

The version they played was beautiful. The sax had the melody, and you felt your heart swell at the sound. You pulled Joe a little closer and rested your head on his chest. The sound of “Moon River” and Joe’s heartbeat made you feel like you were exactly where you were supposed to be. It was a moment of utter completeness.

“I know we just got here, and I was gonna wait until the end of the night,” he said. “But, Y/N, you look damn beautiful, and I wanna kiss you so bad.”

“Kiss me, Joe.”

Your lips met just as the final chorus played, the crescendo matching your feelings exactly. He was gentle and tender as he kissed you, as if he were feeling out the level of passion appropriate. You were equally careful. Neither of you backed away either. You were just treading lightly on new ground.

He pulled away and looked at you. Out of the corner of your eye, you spotted it. Someone was capturing you and Joe and their phone. Your stomach fluttered, and you looked back at him, panicked.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Someone’s recording us,” you whispered. “Behind you.”

“Oh, shit,” he hissed. “Is it phone cameras too?”

You nodded and buried your face into his chest, hoping his frame blocked you. Joe turned his head and spotted the person.

“Gimme one second,” he said. “Go ahead and sit at the table.”

You nodded, shoved some of your hair in your face and retreated to the table. You peeked over to watch Joe go over and talk to the man. The man appeared to apologize and then they posed for a selfie. You almost laughed. Leave it Joe to make a friend out of something like this. You watched him come back over to you before he took a seat.

“No worries,” he said. “I told him he could have a real picture if he deleted the sneaky one. I don’t know why people don’t just ask.”

You only nodded, taking deep breaths to subvert the anxiety threatening to overwhelm you. Joe took your hand and kissed the back of it.

“I’m here, you’re safe,” he said.

You calmed down and looked at him apologetically. “I’m sorry. It’s just a weird thing.”

“I’m sure it’s not weird,” he said. “Can I ask...where does this come from?”

“I might as well tell you since they’re out there,” you began. “My ex sold naked photos of me online. While we were together.”

Joe’s eyes went wide.

“What?!” he yelled, and you shushed him and grabbed his arm as people turned to look. “Why?” he asked, calmer.

“He had a drug problem,” you explained. “Heroin. And after he lost his job, that was how he paid for it.”

“That’s terrible,” he said. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“It’s my fault, really,” you said looking at your lap. “We got drunk one night, and I had gotten him this really nice camera for his birthday. He told me I should pose. And I did. The next day, I completely regretted it and asked him to delete the photos, and he said he would. I didn’t even bother to check the camera. I trusted him, y’know?”

“Did you know he was using at the time?” he asked.

You shook your head. “No. I found out about that almost a year later and that’s why I ended it. I only found out about the photos because after I broke up with him, he sent them to everyone in my life, even my family. I lost my job because my boobs were trending locally on Twitter. I actually write under a different name because when you Google mine, those are still in the top results. So please don’t Google me.”

“I won’t, I promise,” he said.

“Thank you.”

“Jesus,” he continued. “That’s...so fucking horrible.”

“There ya go, there’s my baggage,” you said, trying to make light of it.

“It’s not…” he trailed off. “I don’t see it that way. And also, that was so not your fault. You posed for the pictures, but you were drunk, and you didn’t consent to them being distributed. You also have every right to be wary of cameras you have no control over.”

You cupped his face in your hand, you heart spilling with affection.

“You’re very sweet to care about this for me,” you said.

“I care about everything when it comes to you,” he replied.

You kissed him again.

He spent the rest of the evening making you laugh and twirling you all over the dance floor. You hardly had any alcohol but you felt intoxicated. Completely drunk on Joe. Between dancing, kissing, and laughing, you felt swept off your feet. You never wanted your time with him to end. You wanted this night to last as long as possible.

So, when Joe walked you home, you invited him in. It was just for some water at first, but then you kissed again, needy and a little sloppy. His hands roamed your body. You buried your fingers in his hair. It was hot and fun and a little reckless. But you liked it. More importantly, you liked Joe. So you took a risk with him.

Waking up in Joe’s arms felt like a dream. The sun shining on his hair made it look fiery red and his skin looked like marble. You ran your fingers delicately across his chest. His eyes fluttered open and he looked at you.

“Morning,” he said groggily.

“Good morning,” you returned. “Look, Joe, I know you’re not staying in New York long, so I don’t know what any of this means, but...I really like being with you.”

“God, Y/N,” he chuckled. “So serious first thing in the morning.”

You giggled. “I just wanted you to know where my head’s at. I’m not asking anything of you, okay?”

He rolled on top you and looked deeply into your eyes. “Can I ask something of you?”

“Anything, Joe.”

“Be with me,” he said. “I like you, you like me, let’s be a couple. I don’t like being weird and vague. Let’s simplify it.”

When you previously thought about this, you figured you would turn it down. He was going away and you were staying and you had so little time before this happened. But, as you gazed into his earnest eyes, you found you could deny him nothing.

“Okay,” you agreed, smiling. “I guess...I’m your girlfriend.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” he replied, grinning. “I can’t be the girlfriend?”

You laughed. “You can call yourself whatever you like.”

“You too,” he said, serious now. “As long as you’re mine.”

#joe mazzello #joe mazzello x reader #joe mazzello x you #joe mazzello imagine #bohemian rhapsody #borhap #borhap imagine #borhap boys #john deacon #john deacon x reader #john deacon imagine #john deacon x you #gwilym lee #rami malek #ben hardy #queen #queen imagine

[vorselonarchive]

16, 22, 39 !

https://vorselon.tumblr.com/post/618469116644360192/djfficult-unusualish-asks-3-whos-your

16. if you had to get a tattoo right now, what would you get and where? the only like, specific one im sure of is the one i described in the last ask but other than that, david peyote can draw whatever the hell he wants on me because his style is perfect and i adore everything hes ever tatted

22. if you could see any concert tonight what would you choose? id love to go see the prodigy also aaaagh go crazy go stupid

39. describe your aesthetic gay vagabond eccentric cowboy guy lives in an orange van with a wizard painted on the side, invites u inside and tells u ur fortune or contacts ur dead loved ones in exchange for candy, dresses only in black with accents of bright colours and is covered in silver jewelry and his van is full of scavenged junk, taxidermied fish, and old toys and it smells like mold underneath the mask of incense, hes playing some weird 60s electronic music on his stereo, he looks like a human but hes a movie alien in disguise (im basically describing my ideal future :///)

#answered asks

[matteredloyaltyaa]

really LONG CHARACTER SURVEY. RULES.

repost , don’t reblog ! tag 10 ! good luck !

TAGGED. I stole it. TAGGING. Go for it. lol

FULL NAME : Arthur M/organ NICKNAME : A handful. English, Cowboy/Cowpoke, Black Lung, etc. Common aliases are Tacitus Kilgore and Arthur Callahan. AGE : 36. BIRTHDAY : January 25th, 1836. ETHNIC GROUP : Caucasian. NATIONALITY : American. LANGUAGE / S : English, primarily. Knew a handful of Welsh thanks to his father, but it’s faded with disuse.  SEXUAL ORIENTATION : Bisexual, somewhat closeted.  ROMANTIC ORIENTATION : Biromantic, somewhat closeted. RELATIONSHIP STATUS : Verse dependent, single-ship with @notanoutlaw in most. CLASS : Lower/working HOME TOWN / AREA : Arthur just mentions he was born “up north”, I headcanon around the Oregon area, possibly California due to his mother’s favorite flower, but it’s uncertain. Though, the place he laments the most about is New Austin, or “out west”.   CURRENT HOME : Transitory, he moves with the gang.  PROFESSION : Outlaw, occasional bounty hunter.

PHYSICAL. HAIR : Light brown, dark blonde in some lights. EYES : Unique eye colour, blue-grey-sorta hazel.  NOSE : Average, dimpled. Scarred from fighting and getting it broken a couple times.  FACE : Somewhat sharp features in the brow and cheekbones, square jaw.  LIPS : Full, can be dry/chapped.  COMPLEXION : Somewhat clear? Hard to tell. Dry, dirt spattered sometimes.  BLEMISHES : Uncertain. SCARS : A handful. Most notable are the one he has on his chin that is most visible with shorter facial hair, one across his nose, and the one left on his shoulder by the O’Driscolls in chapter 3.  TATTOOS : N/A HEIGHT : 6′0, possibly 6′1 WEIGHT : Uncertain, fluctuates.  BUILD : Stocky, broad shouldered and he can be fairly intimidating, especially when his weight is about average or above.  FEATURES : Look above? ALLERGIES : N/A USUAL HAIR STYLE : Right parted, about 3-5 in length. Though, for people who don’t know the system--fairly short, tufts out around his ears and may reach the back of his neck before he cuts it again. USUAL FACE LOOK : Expression wise, his kind of got a resting irritated face, sometimes bored. Rarely clean shaven unless he has to be, usually keeps a fair amount of stubble.  USUAL CLOTHING : I change him too much to say. Tends to keep his heavy navy blue winter jacket, jeans/ranch pants, some sort of button up shirt, and sometimes his tan leather jacket. Tends to keep his hat, however, unless he needs to go without. 

PSYCHOLOGY. FEAR / S : Arthur has a mild one of change. He’s adaptable but he’s very sentimental and nostalgic, he will miss “old ways” and previous places. There’s also losing his usefulness, disappointing those who depend on him (much as he will get defensive when it happens). Post-Guarma, he does develop a fear of drowning. It won’t keep him from swimming, but getting swept or held underwater may cause some panic. Post-game au, he does fear about getting sick again and actively avoids doctors.  ASPIRATION / S : Uncertain, just wants to get out of the mess he’s in and eventually just wants a calm existence somewhere. However, once he’s diagnosed with TB, his main goal is getting those who want/will listen to him out of the gang as it starts to fall down. POSITIVE TRAITS : Caring, compassionate (to people he knows, might not be clear on first impression), intelligent (much as he may say the opposite and isn’t exactly book smart), observational, brave, humorous (in certain situations and may be a cover sometimes), friendly (somewhat, changes as he ages), artistic, creative, loyal, etc. NEGATIVE TRAITS : Violent, murderer (doesn’t do it without reason but he knows he’s killed more than he certainly should), defensive, (passive) aggressive, sarcastic, depressive, self-deprecating, selfish, rude (sometimes intentional, sometimes not), conflicted, stubborn, reckless (sometimes, has mellowed out with age but it’s still there), self destructive (sometimes), money-driven (not always a flaw but he’s easily swayed by money). MBTI : ISFJ-T - Turbulent Defender  ZODIAC : Aquarius  TEMPERAMENT : Phlegmatic-Melancholic ANIMALS : I’m not going to take the quiz because the game is very heavy handed with the whitetail buck motif for high honor Arthur. lol VICE HABIT / S : Smoking, drinking, etc. FAITH : Non-religious. GHOSTS ? : Generally, the existence of ghosts isn’t something he completely writes off after he’s witnessed the few in the game, but he’s also hard pressed to admit to believing in them outright. AFTERLIFE ? : Not in any sort of defined sense. He’ll often say he doesn’t believe in one or it won’t be a nice one for him if there is, but he finds himself nervous about the subject once he gets sick.  REINCARNATION ? : He doesn’t know enough about it. ALIENS ? : Not really? Doesn’t really know he’s looking at a UFO when he sees it. POLITICAL ALIGNMENT : Don’t start. ECONOMIC PREFERENCE : Uncertain. SOCIOPOLITICAL POSITION : Uncertain. EDUCATION LEVEL : Does not have a formal education on even the basic levels (primary, high school, etc), however Hosea and Dutch have taught him to read and write and he’s learned a handful of things when it comes to survival and his lifestyle. However, he’s not exactly book smart or the “book learnin’ type”. 

FAMILY. FATHER : Lyle M/organ, deceased. MOTHER : Beatrice M/organ, deceased. SIBLINGS : No blood related, but considers John as one along with a couple other members of camp. EXTENDED FAMILY : He has a few uncles, aunts, and cousins, but he’s not in touch. Issac, his son, and his mother, Eliza, who are both deceased. Mary L/inton/Gillis, ex-fiance. (Cain Kennedy, lover - @notanoutlaw) NAME MEANING / S : Arthur - English, “noble, courageous”, Morgan - (and I’m going against what’s been said in fandom) - Celtic/Welsh surname, comes from Old Welsh name Morcant - “mor” as “sea” and “cant” as “circle”.    HISTORICAL CONNECTION ? : Uncertain in the game, but it’s been pointed out about King Arthur and also Morgan le Fay, which highlights his struggle with good vs evil themes in his character. 

FAVOURITES. BOOK : Uncertain, mostly non-fiction. MOVIE : -- 5 SONGS : -- DEITY : Doesn’t know enough to give a favorite. HOLIDAY : Christmas, in a way. Not quite for the religious context, but he enjoys the hunting and cooking the gang does to celebrate, singing and talking over fires. He remembers it vividly when he was younger, so it’s stuck with him. MONTH : April-May. SEASON : late spring, early summer. PLACE : He likes most places in wilderness, give him something with a view and he’s good. WEATHER : Sunny, average weather. Not too hot, not too cold. SOUND : Rain, birds, etc. SCENT / S : Again, rain, campfires, etc. TASTE / S : Prefers savory over sweet.   FEEL / S : Weightlessness in his limbs once he’s able to sit/lay down after a long day, fingers in his hair, etc. ANIMAL / S : Horses, dogs, cats, animals. NUMBER : He hasn’t given it much thought. COLOUR : Blues, greens, deeper colours.

EXTRA. TALENTS : Sharpshooting, Arthur’s got impeccable aim and speed when using guns, there’s also his drawing, he’s getting fairly good at tracking, etc. BAD AT : Admitting to mistakes, expressing himself emotionally, adhering to rules, anything overly scientific, etc. TURN ONS : Sense of humor, confidence or self-assurance, kindness and/or compassion, dark hair, etc. TURN OFFS : Hypocrisy (much as he suffers from that himself), cockiness (has a limit before confidence becomes a turn off), excessive or needless cruelty, etc. HOBBIES : Drawing, writing in his journal, hunting, wandering around/sight seeing, etc. TROPES : Anti-Hero/Anti-Villain,The Atoner, The Big Guy, Jerk with a Heart of Gold, Obfuscating Stupidity, etc. AESTHETIC TAGS : Horses, old west, deserts, nature, gun slinging, writing, drawing, photography, etc. 

FC INFO. MAIN FC / S : R/oger Clark, mainly in game icons so I haven’t found a need for one. ALT FC / S : -- OLDER FC / S : -- YOUNGER FC / S : -- VOICE CLAIM / S : R/oger Clark GENDERBENT FC / S :

MUN QUESTIONS. Q1 : if you could write your character your way in their own movie , what would it be called , what style would it be filmed in , and what would it be about ? A1 : I actually REALLY enjoy the game’s story line, much as I feel the redemption through death is overplayed and not as deep as people make it out to be. I’d find a way to subvert that or some alternative, but idk. I like the game’s story. lol

Q2 : what would their soundtrack / score sound like ? A2 : Western-y. IDK? The game’s soundtrack is actually really good too so.  Q3 : why did you start writing this character ? A3 : I love his development and progression as a character, and even with the trailers where he seemed no more than an angry outlaw there was a part of me that was still “hmm” about writing him. Ultimately, he’s grown to mean a lot to me and I really enjoy writing for him on this blog.  Q4 : what first attracted you to this character ? A4: As mentioned above, Arthur probably has one of the best character progressions I’ve seen in a while imo. Even in the beginning, I went in under the impression that I’d be playing as this outlaw so the violence and gruffness wasn’t too much of a surprise, much as I wasn’t too attached until later chapters in the game because of this. However, as I spent more time playing as him and reading his journal, seeing how he interacts with strangers and people he loves, he has some depth to him and some deep rooted flaws and insecurities that are played very well in the game. He’s probably one of the few character deaths I’ve cried over. lol Q5 : describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse. A5 : I have to be truthful, Arthur’s an asshole. lol I didn’t like and still don’t like him from Colter into Horseshoe in behavior and personality, much as it’s lessened from my first play of the game because I know what happens to him and how he grows. However, while he’s not blind to himself and how he acts, he doesn’t think for himself really. Even if he hates debt collecting, he does it for the gang and even tells Strauss he does it for pleasure at a point (sarcastic or not, considering they are talking about Thomas, a man trying to raise money for charity while suffering poverty himself on top of having TB), he does whatever Dutch tells him, among many other things. It’s not until later in the game that the theme of grasping redemption comes into play, and he starts to act and think for himself a little more once things start to spiral. As much as I love him with all my heart, Arthur’s got some deep flaws that are hard to ignore.   Q6 : what do you have in common with your muse ? A6 : HHHhh. I’d say we suffer from similar self-esteem issues, not just in body image but morality of character (much as his are way more complicated than mine jaksfha), we also have a similar sense of humor...Yeah, idk. I’m attached to him as a character and I can relate to him in certain ways, but it’s hard to pinpoint.  Q7 : how does your muse feel about you ? A7 : Idk, he’s pixels? Though, for the sake of a fun answer, I genuinely don’t know? We can be fairly similar in mannerisms and thought process (at points), but I have no idea if we’d actually get along if by some universe rip we were able to meet.  Q8 : what characters does your muse have interesting interactions with ? A8: I don’t want to get specific, I interact with a lot of interesting characters. Anybody who’s put me out of a comfort zone or forced me to look at Arthur in the different way has definitely stood out. Q9 : what gives you inspiration to write your muse ? A9 : The game itself is a good source, I enjoy putting up lets plays of it in the background sometimes if I’m struggling or just need something that isn’t music. I get more muse putting together blog playlists than playing them, but there’s that, too. Also generally plotting or talking about him can pull some to the forefront. Q10 : how long did this take you to complete ? A10 : An hour or so, I think?

#hey i'm already damned . || about . #ain't us who changed . || headcanon . #/// long post #[I love how once it got into paranormal experiences I had to account for the fact some of those things exist as things in canon lmao]

[axolotlator]

Here's my Hot Take™ on how Defenders of Tomorrow would go down (Pt.1)

-It would start out on earth with the cyberpunk aesthetic™ in a city named Arus

-Instead of the Garrison being a space exploration school, it would be like the main police force

-It's kind of like a cowboy bebop like universe, where the planets in the solar system are colonized and you can travel between them

-Each planet has a Representative, like a Planet President

-Earths Representative is Sam Holt (idk what his name is in the VDT universe tho)

-Aliens and humans live side by side/ aliens have already been introduced to earth and all the other planets

-The Galra are still aliens but the Galra empire is a gang simply called 'The Empire'

- Daibazaal and Altea were both planets in the same solar system

-All the paladins of old were a representive for a planet in their collective solar system

-Alfor was Altea's representative and Zarkon was Daibazaal's obv

-Quintessence is a power drug that was created by Honerva (don't know her VDT name) who was Vice President of Altea, once she married zarkon she became Vice President of Daibazaal

-Alfor and Zarkon got into a dispute over the production and sales of quintessence and a civil war broke out between the planets of the solar system

-Alfor and Honvera became addicted to quintessence over this time

-Alfor won the civil war against Zarkon and Daibazaal was banished from solar system

-Zarkon gathered together all the remaining galran after being banished and banded them together to take over altea

-Altea and the remaining planets in the solar system were taken over and destroyed by a quintessence powered up drugged Zarkon

-There's no 10,000 year time skip but there is 18-19 year time gap between current and these events

-Before altea was destroyed Vex (VDT Coran) and Alzina (VDT Allura) were sent out into space on the Castle ship which they title castle of lions. Alzina was a baby at this time

-Zarkon and Honvera (now calling herself by her gang name Haggar) build up a gang that specializes in quintessence

-Their industry has taken over the underground of tons of solar systems

-Vex pilots the ship to Earths solar system after hearing the Empire hadn't reached there yet and they land on earth

-Vex raises Alzina on earth yet they still live out of the castle ship

-Vex and Alzina know they're aliens in my take

-They both live on the down low bc they don't want to be discovered as alteans, as the whole universe knows about the Altean civil war and Vex and Alzina don't want word to spread to zarkon about them being alive

-Alzina is a badass who works in the underground as a chemist

-Alzina is the one who starts the paladin name system, she uses the name Pink Paladin while interacting in the public as to not reveal her identity

-Alzina still has her good morals and does her fair share of bounty hunting as well

-Alzina is bi

-The Empire catches word that there's an untapped quintessence potential in Earths solar system and decides to head there to take over the underground

-Shiro is a high ranked officer at the Garrison and is sent out on a mission to Kerberos (which hasn't been colonized yet) along with Matt Holt (don't know his VDT name) and Sam Holt to inspect Kerberos and determine if it should be colonized

-Shiro is gay obv

-Pluto is a mining planet in this btw, no one lives there full time

-While on the mission to Kerberos the galra capture them in hopes to use them as bargaining tools

-there is a one year time skip between when Shiro and the others were captured to the current time the au takes place in btw

-The Empire begins to take over the underground of the other planets in Earth's solar system during this time

-Akira (Keith) was a garrison student in training under Shiro's guidance but dropped out after Shiro was taken to look for him in the underground

-I've been saying underground a lot and I want y'all to know I don't literally mean underground the planets but like the crime land, the black market y'all kno

-Krolia (idk VDT name) was part of a rival gang to the Empire called the Blade of Marmora. Krolia was still a spy in this

-Krolia has Akira and Alice (VDT Acxa) with Texas kogane before going back to the Blade bringing Alice with her (they're twins)

-Texas was killed in the underground and Akira was abandoned

-Akira was adopted by Shiro and put in the Garrison. Akira and Shiro had a beyond close bond and loved each other v much

-Akira is gay

-Akira didn't care about what shit he fucked up, he only cared about finding Shiro so he was p reckless but he wasn't like intentionally hurting people

-Akira obvs had a motorcycle

-Leandro (Lance) was a garrison drop out who decided that the police force was 'too tame' for him

-Leandro works as basically a full on bounty hunter by the name 'The Tailor', he also steals occasionally and also isn't worried about being reckless but he still cares about people

-Leandro is Bi

-One time Leandro was in a fight and was about to lose when Akira showed up in a motorcycle to save him last minute

-Akira and Leandro didn't know each other at this time but Leandro swore he would repay Akira if the day ever came when he needed help

-Leandro doesn't know Akira's name at this point, but he nicknames him Samurai after seeing Akira fight with a knife

-Akira also doesn't know Leandro's real name but Leandro introduced himself as the tailor when they first met

-Leandro does end up getting Akira out of a tough situation and the two make it their thing to save each other

-Henare (Hunk) was a garrison student as well but he never dropped out and planned to work for the police

-Henare and Leandro were best friends from when Leandro spent a short time at the garrison. They never lost their bond but Henare doesn't approve of what Leandro is doing, but he wouldn't ever rat out his friend

-Henare is Pansexual

-Bounty hunting/Vigilante action is kinda illegal in this world. Instead of turning in their bounties to the police for reward, bounty hunters catches are sold underground

-Laya (Pidge) is an engineer/hacker and overall genius who despite growing up with a Garrison dedicated family loved messing around and would often venture to the underground and black market with Matt to buy new parts for robots and to get up to schenagines

-After Matt and Sam went missing she changed her name to Pana and went underground full time in the hopes of finding him (she done pull an Akira)

-Pana sells information and robots to the blackmarket and works as a kind of an on call hacker

-Pana is asexual

-Pana became friends with Leandro after she makes a deal that goes sour and Leandro comes in last minute and takes the guy out

-Leandro notices how young Pana is and makes sure to keep an eye out from then on out and realizing he won't go away Pana begins to work with him in hopes of information on Matt.

-Pana ends up actually caring about him and the two take on a brother-sister kinda role though she won't admit it

-Pana becomes friends with Henare through Leandro and the two instantly bond over their love of engineering

-Pana builds rover when she first went to live in the underground full time to keep her company and rover is like her lil sidekick aw

-Shiro lives within the Empire for a year and when the Empire let's their guard down, Shiro is able to grab a small pod like ship and high tails it back to earth

-He crash lands on earth in the desert outside of Arus

-Shiro lost an arm while in the Empire in this as well and when he crash lands he damages his leg beyond repair

- Dante (VDT Adam) will build Shiro a new arm and leg and they'll bond and end up dating

- Pana, Leandro and Henare will get together with Akira when saving Shiro from the crash

-Alzina and Vex will get together with everyone else during a fight

-Alice will have been seperated from Krolia and will have joined up with Lotor and the generals

-Lotor broke away from his parents will have arranged a mini gang with the generals to go against the Empire

-Alzina and the crew will build fighter ships which they'll name blue lion, red lion, yellow line, green lion and black lion (yes the lions are fighter ships in this)

-The galra will come to take over and the the team including Dante will fight back.

-They call themselves the paladins and each name themselves after a color

-they'll call their whole operation voltron

-Rowan (Romelle) will be one of the alteans that was born off altea as her parents were off planet when it was destroyed. Lotor offers her and other alteans the opportunity to join his mini gang and she takes it. She works with lotor for awhile but leaves after believing he's not what he says he is.

-She goes to earth to escape him and the Empire and ends up meeting the rest of the gang

-Her and Alzina eventually become a thing

-And y'all already know leakira is happening

That's it that's all I have I can't think of anything else

#voltron #vdt #defenders of tomorrow #leakira #klance #alzina #rowan #henare #pana #dante #shiro

[mrclinical]

Cowboys and Aliens (2011)

Directed by Jon Favreau

Rating: 37/100

The spring of original ideas dries up pretty quickly, leaving the audience with a film which turfs out as many genre conventions, from both Sci-Fi and Western cinema, as it can in its two-hour run time. These conventions are fed into a fast-moving and superficial narrative with the cold dexterity of a poorly calibrated machine.

A couple of days ago when I was writing up my thoughts on Favreau’s live-action remake of Lion King (which I was rather lukewarm on to say the least) I took a cursory look over his directorial filmography and there, sandwiched between Iron Man 2 and Chef, was Cowboys and Aliens. That genre-bending box-office flop which everyone had forgotten about - had pushed deep down into their subconscious, as to repress the memory of its hideously saturated hues, its over-reliance on box-ticking dramatic conventions and Harrison Ford’s simply woeful performance as gruff tough-guy Woodrow Dolarhyde. I can vaguely remember attending a screening of it at the time of its release - back in the days when bandwagon jumping was a specialty of mine and everyone with good sense was panning it as a load of claptrap. I decided to revisit the picture. Give it a fairer crack of the whip. It was a grave mistake… 

Daniel Craig is Jake Lonergan who awakes battered and bruised, squinting into the sunshine, unable to decipher his own identity. He has a mysterious metal fetter attached to his wrist and he soon finds out that he is adept at throwing hands and cracking skulls. Just as the audience begin to piece together Lonergan’s past, through a series of horribly rendered flashbacks, Favreau hits the audience with extra-terrestrial aircraft's and laser beams. Hence, Cowboys and Aliens. The aircraft's start abducting people from the nearby town and Lonergan soon realises that the fetter is not a fetter, but a high-powered weapon capable of reducing the flying objects to cinders. The townspeople soon realise that they must put aside their personal feuds and unite in order to locate and recover their loved ones. 

The most leering problems with the picture do not arise through the audacity of its premise, but with Favreau and his gaggle of nine writers. Nine writing credits. Nine. The spring of original ideas dries up pretty quickly, leaving the audience with a film which turfs out as many genre conventions, from both Sci-Fi and Western cinema, as it can in its two-hour run time. These conventions are fed into a fast-moving and superficial narrative with the cold dexterity of a poorly calibrated machine. The soullessness of the picture is coupled with Favreau’s strange aesthetic choices. It was rumoured that Favreau engaged in unwavering and heated talks with studio executives to shoot Cowboys and Aliens on celluloid. I find it utterly baffling that aesthetics were taken into close consideration when you consider the garishness of the colour palette and the CGI. Far from embodying the warped and discombobulated psychological state of our amnesiac protagonist, the overly saturated shots elliptically deployed by Favreau look dreadful; amateur even- almost like some careless crew member had accidentally dropped the 35mm reel in a vat of bleach. Simply put, the picture seems more dated than its age suggests.

Emerging from the saturation of CGI carnage and contrived melodrama, relatively unstained,  is Daniel Craig. Despite everything else going completely pear-shaped in the construction of the film, Craig’s appearance only solidifies his reputation and prowess as a brooding action star. There are very few that do it better. It is almost as if Favreau had transplanted Casino Royale’s James Bond into the American west, handed him a hat and some leather boots, and told him to bring that 007 silent magnetism to his film. It is a method that in many respects works. Craig is a much needed tonic, to Harrison Ford’s tough-guy screeching and edgy exposition. It is not all Ford’s fault. The characterisation is like that of a pantomime baddie, one who just needs to be opened up to humanity, so that he can see the implicit benefits of being a goody. The transformation from bad to good is much too quick to be convincing. It feels unnatural and silly. Which I guess is my main complaint with the whole movie. The writing is silly, the directing is silly, but the film takes itself too seriously to be any fun.

#cowboys and aliens #film #movie #review #daniel craig #harrison ford #jon favreau

[gotatext]

yo, im not gonna lie guys, im super drunk, so this bio is like.... completely ocpy and pasted but;.... pls plot with me..... im so excited to bring this baby here.... i feel it is the perfect place to write her and i hven’t had the chance to in so long ..... love me..... and greta........ please im so excited this is back, last time i played jack..... n willow??? i think....... maybe archie too...... dont even remember...... who i fuckin played..... but i was here...... and queer..... loud..... and proud..... god this dumb bitch needs to sleep.....

GRETA O'DRISCOLL

20. born in marfa, texas. luvs wearing gingham print dresses and cowboy boots. vert into art and pornography, and particularly the combination of the two. wants to do a PHD on gender studies and female autonomy in porn.

( kristine froseth | she / her | cisfemale ) hey, you hear ( young lady, you’re scaring me by ron gallo ) playing over on the ( rv lot ) ? that’s where ( greta o'driscoll ) lives! i heard they moved in from ( marfa, texas ) exactly ( four months ) ago. they’re very ( zealous ) but also pretty ( erratic ). maybe that’s why davie keeps calling them the ( libertine ). starlit is full of people, but this ( 20 ) year old is really going to liven things up around here! ( nora | 23 | she / her | gmt )

personality: easy-going, deceptive, manipulative, self-reliant, profound, amiable, nihilistic, self-serving, laid back, independent unmotivated, self-corrupting, charming, lazy, impulsive, alluring.

likes: art, music, philosophy, DC comics, arcade games, candyfloss, fish and chips on the beach, deep red lipstick, marijuana, dogs, Kate Moss, late-night strolls, chemistry, suspenders, cigarettes, herbal tea, gallows humour, cold coffee, long showers, brown eyes, tchaikovsky, dr. seuss, DJ sets, magnolias.

dislikes: bananas, coffee, mental mathematics, children, misogyny, the imaginary future, literature, Wes Anderson films

muse tag

pinterest

aesthetics: a bubble of pink gum on chapped lips, mom jeans, a beaten up pair of adidas, strawberry laces, knee-highs, chapped lips, split knuckles, bruises you try to cover with concealer, stick and poke tattoos, sleep caught in your eyes on a lazy afternoon, alien conspiracy theories and sci-fi paperbacks, doc martens with fraying laces, the red string of a thong peaking out purposely from jeans, a rucksack permanently packed for the move, a streak of red across your lips, roller blades, cut knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes.

cliffsnotes on biography

 - she’s called greta (under witness protection), and she’s a serial dater. she’s incredibly restless and doesn’t settle. before she came to seattle, she’d lived in 8 different cities in 3 years. born into a single-parent house with two older sisters so always surrounded by women and as a teenager she often let boys walk all over her bc she just craved male attention  -   every place she goes, she becomes a new character, someone who’s a figment of her imagination, as if each city is repertory theatre and she’s a character actress, so as a result everyone from her past views her as a completely different person depending on when she met them.   -   she’s been involved in a series of destructive relationships because when people discover she’s not who she pretends to be she often gets explosive and defensive.  -   (tw gun) she’s now under witness protection and moved to connecticut because she shot a previous boyfriend in self-defence and his family are trying to have her done for murder, but she got tired of being moitored so is now even on the run from the police / her faked identity.  - easy to get along with (provided you don’t anger, provoke or question her too much) because she WANTS your character to be entralled by her and will do whatever it takes to win them over. she wants everyone to love her   -  big into sports. big into gender politics. big into art. does a lot of art installation pieces to do with female and queer bodies. massive feminist. low key quite scared of powerful men bcos of her ex. wants to start a female only lesbian commune. big fan of the honey bee.

full biography

trigger warnings: drugs, domestic abuse, gun.

you never meant for it to happen. you’d heard the stories, of girls who let their man walk all over them, and thought to yourself “i’ll never be one of those girls…” the kind that eat low-fat yoghurt and drink slim fast to shred a few extra pounds because he said she was getting round in the tummy, or the ones who spent their evenings tied to a kitchen sink drinking wine while him and the boys played poker, wishing god, if only I could get out of here. not you, not you raised by strong women, four bright shining beacons. single mother with her hard-as-nails attitude and her stony glares, elder sisters (twins) one ginger, one blonde, one doctor, one lawyer, both determined to take a bullet to the brain and a hammer to the patriarchy before they let a man touch them without asking. you were always so inferior, so insecure and small, like a bird (like a sparrow) with blonde plaits down your back sucking tropicana whilst your bosom buds sucked dick, their lips permanently ripe with stories of their sexual exploits, fake tan and glittered nails whilst you sat in the unbroken egg of virginity wondering what it was like to be loved. one day you found out. 

lily milligan’s parents gone and a free house for the night, bottles of ouzo and tequila swiped from your mother’s liquor cabinet thinking she wouldn’t know (she always knew) your legs, hardened from pep squad, slut dropping on a kitchen table because the boys thought it would be fun to get the quiet girl drunk. you’d never had a sip before that night. band t-shirts, denim shorts and the split soles of rotten converse that you refuse to let go of, you still clutched with both hands to your youth, but in a tube top now (borrowed from alice carmichael who had a sister in college) and a short tennis skirt, your feet not in trainers but in thigh-high boots. uncomfy as hell but lily said you needed to look sexy. you didn’t know if you wanted to be sexy. you didn’t know what kind of girl you were, if you were even a girl at all. but robbie looked at you like he knew exactly who you were, like he knew you better than you knew yourself, and his lips had the pink cupid’s bow of a movie star, and his hair was dark locks, curling like a mane. his hands were soft, and suddenly on your waist, and after three more shots his lips were on yours and his name was the only sound in your head and on your lips as you lost it in lily’s college sister’s bedroom beneath the glare of a T-Pain poster. you bled for what seemed like hours, his hand still in yours, kissing on the sofa as truth tellers and daredevils continued to spin a bottle of unprecedented youth. you thought it was love. robbie was the one. he loved you, you knew it, how else could someone be so soft? but soon he grew bored, scrunched up your paper heart and set it alight. then came the tears, the hatred, the ‘fuck robbie, in fact, fuck all boys.’ and that you did.

you were known for being easy. any boy could be yours for a night, as long as he promised to love you for those few short breaths and pants before you cried yourself to sleep. you felt poisoned, but poisonous as well, as if by ensnaring these young boys you were gaining power over them, and not the other way around. soon it started to work. they’d want more, but you’d deny them it, sick of sucking off silly schoolboys, they’d call you a tease, a vixen. maybe you were, but you couldn’t help but want older men. you got the history teacher first time, him bending you over his desk to sneak a hand up your tennis skirt as the after-school clubs carried on next door, unawares. love didn’t exist, not for you. it was nothing but a game for pretty young girls to play, bubble gum in their canines and a hand tugging at the hem of their cheer skirt.

there was so much anger inside of your small body, ‘beware of boys and their hook-like words’. hockey helped. there was something formidable about the feeling of a stick like a weapon in your hands and the thwack it made against thighs in the heat of a scrum - “slipped, sorry!” - you’d utter with a snakeskin smile, millicent quinn knowing that you’d hit her on purpose because she shagged robbie at that party last week. she couldn’t prove it, cobbled acne on her forehead turning green with disgust. ben came into your life like a car crash. two years your senior, with a baseball jacket and shoulders like a god. he became your personal hero. on the pitch, he was lethal. together, you could bring anyone to their ruin. each day after last period he’d be waiting in his car. you’d leap into his arms like a girl-half starved, love me, love me, love me, your heated kisses the envy of every junior girl. he was yours for three blissful years, utterly yours, and you were his, his star-spangled girl, and he was your knight - you were both the same, playing games, always difficult to predict. it was a shock to all when he proposed, high-school sweethearts find love in south dakota.

the engagement was a bittersweet affair; three months – you barely out of your gingham print skirts and into a graduation gown, him, a surly quarterback towering above your sisters, cigarette at his lips and a scowl like a fart in a lift. they hated him. so did you. but you were eighteen and in love, and he fitted the cookie cutter mould. everyone wanted him, and you had him. you had him and you were happy, happy, happy, and he loved you. he said he’d give you the world, anything you wanted hand-picked and given to you. instead, he gave you a jack russell terrier and a flat you couldn’t swing a cat in, wallpaper peeling like the rotten bits inside of you, the bits that only he knew. and you got tireder and tireder of the sad excuse of a life he’d picked out for you, him out doing god knows what to pay the bills, and you dancing on tables to pave your way to stardom, and this was love, this was real, until the shine wore off and your fresh-faced, dimple-cheeked cheerleader facade faded and the ugliness started to reveal itself, the whining, the petulance, the sharp-tempered cruelty, the mind games, the need to always win, win, win. he was dull, he was boring, he was nothing like the boy the girls had said he was and no chiselled six-pack could hide his lack of anything remotely interesting, your patience wearing thin until it snapped like rubber, a rucksack on your back, running shoes on your feet and the joint bank account emptied into your eighth grade birthday wallet.

you built your small fortunes working the casinos of sioux falls, a crimson dress and an attitude to match. bookish archie with his little dipper freckles was fun for a month before he became just as dull and dreary as the rest. a three-hour bus and you were in minneapolis, bright eyed and bushy tailed, fresh meat ready for the pickings. a hostel here, a friendly co-worker’s sofa there as you made what you could by taking off your clothes and shaking your ass like you were back in pep squad, doing what you did best. you met your fair share of creeps, and soon it was back on the road to escape a wide-eyed stalker and a restless itch for more. milwaukee, chicago, you made the roads your own. log cabins and lodgings, and the occasional motel, a beaten up pick up truck purchased at a scrap merchants – you got a few miles out of it before it bit the dust, and when you finally set it alight after nights spent lounging across the driver’s seat, a parka tucked over you as a duvet, you were sad to see it go. you’re nomadic by fault, never attaching to place, people or things, creating a new personality in every place you go like a character actress; each town is a different repertory theatre, and you’re the star. a compulsive liar, you even fib about your own name, to some you’re ellen, nineteen, bookish, a law student who likes smoking and cosmos. to someone else you’re rita, you’re twenty-five and look young for your age, like smoking, comics and fucking in public places.

in the bright lights of michigan, you found charlie, sweet charlie, too good for you, though you let him spoil you while he thought you were the small town girl of his dreams. next came abigail, who was fun until the jealously kicked in, and then luke, gorgeous luke, dangerous, exciting, who despite his temper, despite the fights, despite bruises down your spine and your teeth marks on his arms, loved you with the strength of a wildfire. there was destruction in your wishbones, a savageness from the field, from the pitch and now somehow in his arms, you were godly. he was cruel, he was careless, and he refused to fall at your feet like so many other boys had, which only you made you want him all the more. you were rage incarnate. you hated him so fiercely you thought you might kill him, so he played the only card you wouldn’t predict; proposed.

the house you shared was a backstreet flat in detroit, you make your name as a downtown singer while he foots the bill with pills. they have a drug for anything these days, to dull the senses, to pick them up, to drive you to insanity or pull you out of the madness hole. the two of you live like criminals on the run (you never told him that you were, living out your days as the enigma he wanted you to be), you with your voice like caramel and fishnet legs. you were his and his alone until his hand was at your throat and the gun was in your hands screaming at him to stop, stop, stop, until a bullet stoppered his brain, crimson staining linoleum as you cast yourself out like lucifer. self-defence was decreed the moment they saw your violet neck, black tears and headlight eyes and mind screaming red, red, red like the pom-poms you shook so willingly in school and the insides of his skull. you were gone, and “you” was born, renamed “greta”, boxed, shipped-out, and next-day delivered to vegas where under witness protection you were a student, blank slate, fresh-faced in a place where no one knew your name, doing what you always did and starting again.

#starlit:intro #starlit:ooc #pls plot w me im going 2 sleep but.... will reply tomorrow #spam me with ideas i LIVE for that shit x #⥂ greta o'driscoll. ╱ musings.

[vampireloreskill]

Get To Know Me 

tagged by @fourfinefreshfishforyou a billion years ago, thank you so much!! i actually Did have fun filling this out even if it took me forever 

 anyone who still wants to do this can say i tagged them!

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Who wrote this? A fed??

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? Kris

3. BIRTHDAY? This year

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? Would you believe me if I said Warriors

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? Ghosts no, aliens sort of... I’m not sure I buy into whole other civilizations but I find it hard to believe that there isn’t some kind of life outside of our planet even if it’s just bacteria 

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? Rick Riordan is pretty cool

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? Christmas

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? Strawberry or peach 

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? Amazing

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG?  Your Type - Carly Rae Jepson

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? I’m a big fan of defenestration

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO?  Your Type - Carly Rae Jepson

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? I don’t like to blanket recommend shows because everyone has such different tastes

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? Tbh I just mope around until I either feel better or give up and go to sleep

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? This is an Assassin’s Creed and Sims zone ONLY

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? Strangers on the internet knowing my second biggest fear

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? Objectively it’s probably my ability to see things from other people’s perspective but TBH I much prefer my sense of humor and ability to laugh at my own jokes whether or not anyone else finds them funny 

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? My inability to self moderate

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? I want to say neither,, but I may be leaning towards dogs in recent years :/

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? Winter, but lately Autumn has been sneaking up on it

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? Nah

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? Being small... I loved hiding in tiny spaces and being picked up

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? *cowboy voice* Now there’s a name I haven’t heard in a long time...

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? Dark brown

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? At this point it’s basically black but I still like to say dark brown

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? God, my family, probably a lot of people idk I catch feelings easily

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? Literally no one but God 

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? A lot of seemingly random celebrities, if you count constantly reciting names in specific patterns as thinking 

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? Yes, lots of things! 

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? lmao

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? REDWALLLLL

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? I’m not sure what the opposite of shrug emoji is but the answer is still no one

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? I’m not, but someone needs to tell me that

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? I’m not sure I have any phobias? Irrational fears, Sure

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT? Behind it!

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? I REALLY want to get into dollhousing

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? I know I said Les Misérables in a previous tag meme but I now remember that I actually read the first book in C.S. Lewis’s space trilogy a while back more recently

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Spider-man: Into The Spiderverse which was........ AMAZING 

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? When I was younger I had a lap harp but that’s about it

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? Opossums

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? I’m not a fan of naming names in this context sorry!

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? A lot, but I’ve concluded that for any powers gained I would inevitably just end up becoming a super villain and/or batman so hard pass

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? When I first wake up, and just lie there trying to hold on to what I was just dreaming about

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? It’s basically physically impossible for me not to grin like a fool watching Wander Over Yonder

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? Does Wii Bowling count

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? Apple cider

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? I don’t know? Probably when I wanted to wake up at a certain time

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? Sometimes? Depends on how possible it is that I could fall

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? Dry skin currently 

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? I was going to say no but I have the distinct feeling that I have even though I didn’t remember absolutely anything about it except maybe the auditorium?

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? No

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? Zookeeper

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? Um. Eternia?? ajfghdk 

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? Not growing as a person

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? Not really, but I do like the ability to turn on lights if I need to

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? My vocal cords were made for Christmas carols and little else. But yeah, sometimes.

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? I’m not... sure?

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? I’ll let you know when I’ve found it

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? Where I already do

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? Yes

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? Night owl

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? Sunsets

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? I feel like I could make an educated guess in an emergency

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? Headphones

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? No

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? I feel like it’s probably pop or disco tbh

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? Jesus 

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? Here and there, the only series I’ve actually read all the way through is Cable & Deadpool (2004) but I want to get into Venom

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? Not to be cliche but injustice of any kind

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? Real book, I like turning pages and the way the cover fits into my hands. Can’t say I’m a fan of the smell though.

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? Vocabulary

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? Yes

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? Sims 4 packs

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′2 or so

75. CAN YOU COOK? If it involves anything other than a microwave or a toaster then,,, no

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? Vampires, villains in love, wood paneling 

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? Intrusive thoughts, Marius Pontmercy, mint flavored toothpaste

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? I... Have more female mutuals

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? Bisexual but like it’s Complicated. Also this is the first time I’ve ever actually said that directly so ✌️🎉

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? A fed wrote this

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? My mom

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Earlier this month

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? I don’t really follow any, but I used to be obsessed with the videos of this one guy who acted out crossovers of DC/Marvel characters with action figures and had a really great voice

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? I do! I just never do anything with them once I’ve taken them lol

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? I don’t have one right now, but I adore choose your own adventure ones

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? Pretty good with my adoptive parents. I want to be closer with my birth mom but I don’t... really know how to go about that without being a disappointment. Never met my birth dad which has been eating at me somewhat lately.

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? Uhh Australian maybe??

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? Mexico

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 6

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? Do you take me for a clown

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? Yes, I’m a nondenominational christian 

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OF THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? The ocean, it’s teeming with life and I find it bafflingly fascinating how there’s still so much we don’t know about it

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? Absolutely not

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? Almost every single time we go shopping in Sam’s Club I get inexplicably feverish and nauseous and feel like I’ve thrown out my back until we get to the check out. That and I may have a dairy allergy? But honestly my stomach is acting out every other day so who knows really.  

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? Ye

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? No

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? Not as often as I should

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? Aesthetically, the beach, but forests are less sandy

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? Pat, don’t rub (When drying your hands)

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR?  mmMM I don’t really lie, like, seriously about stuff that I can recall? I’ll jokingly say stuff that blatantly isn’t true and even then I sometimes feel guilty and confess seconds later. Unless you count lying by omission? Or saying stuff like “I’m fine” LMAO. The World May Never Know

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? We Don’t Discuss Harry Potter On This Blog, but ravenclaw all the way and any test that tries to sort me into hufflepuff isn’t Valid 

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? Generally just when I’m alone

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? Introvert

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? I’ve tried, but I just don’t have the attention span for it asdfgh. Sometimes I write down my dreams though.

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? Yes

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? Convince someone else to pick it up and check for ID

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? Yes

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? That’s a personal question

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? Yes

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? No

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? Count Dracula from Monster Family (2017) ok so,,, i know he tried to freeze the entire world because a married woman rejected him but LISTEN

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? No

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? Following Jesus

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? Mm, not karma per say, but I do generally think that what goes around often comes around in way or another

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? No

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? NO

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? Idk! there a lot different types of smart people

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? Nice try, but someone might actually read this

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? I’m basically nocturnal so... yeah

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOUR CLOTHES? Various jewel tones

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? Ehhhhhhh

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? Not that I know of

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 21

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? I can’t really think of one right now

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? Whichever I’m in the mood for!

#tag meme

[problemsofabooknerd]

Recommending LGBTQIA+ SFF

Pride Day 5!

Check out the intro to my Pride project here.

Listen, I have a deep love for queer contemporary. I love a love story. But my truest love has always been fantasy, and it’s always a little bit harder to find LGBTQIA+ rep in SFF. I want my gays in space! In castles! On quests! And not just gays, of course. I want bi guys and gals, trans and enby folks, and ace peeps all across fantastical worlds. So, if you’re thinking along the same lines as me, check out the recommendations down below the cut. And at the end I’ll even add a quick list of some queer SFF on my personal TBR too!

Sci-Fi

The Abyss Surrounds Us by Emily Skrutskie (goodreads, amazon)

This book is about lesbian pirates and sea monsters. That is the end of my pitch. Seriously, if the sentence “lesbian pirates and sea monsters” doesn’t already have you hooked, I don’t know what to say, I will never be able to convince you of how incredible this book is. Plus, it’s the first in a duology so there’s even more to love. 

Not Your Sidekick by C.B. Lee (goodreads, amazon)

I already mentioned this book in my first post this month about books with a large cast of queer characters. If you like queer teens of color kicking ass and saving the world, this is the series for you. 

Dreadnought by April Daniels (goodreads, amazon)

What? You want more queer superhero stories? Not a problem. Dreadnought follows Dany, a trans girl who is still in the closet due to her transphobic and abusive family. Then the superhero Dreadnought dies at her feet, and Dany inherets all his powers - and the body she has always wanted. This duology deals with some darker aspects of being a superhero, and does have warnings for a LOT of transphobia (one of the villains is a terf and she’s really awful), but it’s excellent and ownvoices and I can’t recommend it enough. Plus Dany is a lesbian, and the second book has a f/f romance!

We Are the Ants by Shaun David Hutchinson (goodreads, amazon)

Henry has had a rough year. His boyfriend killed himself, his relationship with his brother has become even more strained, and his grandmother is rapidly remembering less and less. Oh, and also he’s abducted by aliens semi-regularly who tell him they’re going to destroy the world and he has the power to stop it. This one has big trigger warnings for depression, suicide, and attempted sexual assault, but it’s also a beautiful book about mental illness, complex family relationships, and love. 

Axiom: The Last Hope by Rachel Marie Pearcy (goodreads, amazon)

If you read a million dystopian books a few years ago when the genre was big, I’m sure you, like me, were missing out on queer dystopian. I am here to make your life better! Axiom is about a world in which every decision is made for you, until Ella falls off the beaten path and falls for her female roommate. It has all the tropes and high-intensity of a dystopian, plus a f/f romance that really strengthens the whole center of the novel.

Fantasy

Peter Darling by Austin Chant (goodreads, amazon)

Austin Chant is going to probably be on as many posts as I can manage this month, despite the fact that he only has three novellas, but I can’t help my love. Peter Darling is a sequel/retelling of Peter Pan wherein Peter is trans. He returns to Neverland after a ten year absence, and finds it even darker than he left it. This also features a m/m romance between Hook and Pan. Austin Chant owns my heart, that’s what you need to know. 

Caroline’s Heart by Austin Chant (goodreads, amazon)

What? Already another Austin Chant novella? Yeah, that seems like me. Caroline’s heart is a f/m romance, and it’s about trans folks falling in love. Cecily is a witch who lost her true love year ago, and is desperately trying to resurrect her. But when a cowboy in peril stumbles into her path, she has to decide if giving up the past is worth it to save a man she barely knows. This is super western, super queer, super historical, and super magical. It’s everything. 

Spellbook of the Lost and Found by Moira Fowley-Doyle (goodreads, amazon)

And speaking of queer magic, I have some more to share! Spellbook is set in a small town in Ireland and follows a variety of teenagers with intersecting stories and lives. One night at a party, a spell is cast and everyone wakes up the next day to find they have lost something. One of them also finds a spellbook that possibly has a way to bring everything back, and there is a part to play for every person in the group. There are three POV characters, two of whom are queer women. There are bisexual girls and a lesbian character, and f/f and f/m romances both happen. There are also POC and one of the bi girls is deaf in one ear. Plus it’s magical and odd and Irish and fabulous, as if that was not already evident in this description.

Amberlough by Lara Elena Donnelly (goodreads, amazon)

Amberlough is set in a an alternate 1930s-inspired world full of cabarets and a rising fascist regime. It follows Cyril, a spy, his lover Aristide, smuggler and emcee at the Bumble Bee Cabaret, and Cordelia, a Bumble Bee dancer. When Aristide’s life is threatened, Cyril is forced to turn against his government and his moral code to keep him safe. The worldbuilding in this one blows me away, and in general has an aesthetic that is unbeatable. Plus the sequel was just recently released! 

Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire (goodreads, amazon)

We always see the stories of children who wander through magical doorways, but what happens to them when they stumble back to our world and out of the place they feel like they belonged? In the Wayward Children series, it means you end up at Eleanor West’s Home For Wayward Children. This is a novella that deals with magical trauma and finding a way and a place to be your true self, and the entire series is incredible. This first one features and asexual protagonist and a trans side character, but the books afterwards always feature queer characters and magically heartbreaking stories. 

Wild Beauty by Anna-Marie McLemore (goodreads, amazon)

If you are looking for magical realism with cursed queer ladies, this is all you could ever possibly want. Wild Beauty is set in the lush gardens of La Pradera, where the women of the Nomeolvides family care for it every day. The women also have a curse: should any of them fall in love too deeply, the object of their affection will disappear. Then one day a mysterious boy appears in the garden with no memory of who he is. This is a story in which every single female character is bisexual, basically. It opens with all the cousins being in love with the same girl, and it’s magical and wonderful and about the traumas of colonialism and the power of family. Plus, all of the characters are Latinx. It’s excellent. 

High Fantasy

Of Fire and Stars by Audrey Coulthurst (goodreads, amazon)

A book about two princesses falling in love, which is basically all you need to know. I mean, there’s also the fact that one of them has the ability to control fire (despite the fact that magic is forbidden), or the fact that she is engaged to the prince and falls for his sister instead. Or! That there are so many horses and so much horse love it’s at times overwhelming! These are also good facts about Of Fire and Stars, but ultimately I know that all you all need to be told is that two princesses fall for each other and it is glorious. 

Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust (goodreads, amazon)

I just did a full review of this yesterday, which I will link here. Basically this is a retelling of Snow White that focuses on the complex relationship between a princess and her stepmother. It’s super feminist, fascinating, and features a f/f relationship for the Snow White character. Read it immediately, I’m begging you.

And that’s the end of my list! But if you’re looking for some more, my TBR currently includes The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet by Becky Chambers, Reign of the Fallen by Sarah Glenn Marsh, Passing Strange by Ellen Klages, Otherbound by Corinne Duyvis, Hullmetal Girls by Emily Skrutskie, and Santa Olivia by Jacqueline Carey. Ok, your TBR should be good and stuffed with queer SFF now, so I’ll wrap up here. And check back tomorrow if you want to hear all the little details of my personal sexuality journey!

#pride #pride 2018 #book recs #queer sff #book recommendations #my post

[scrumptiousdonutangel]

All

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

You are enough by sleeping at last, Good old days by macklemore and kesha, Blood//Water by Grandson, Eyes to the sky by Jon Bellion, High hopes by panic! at the disco, and Cowboy casanova by Carrie Underwood (I know its alot of genres)

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

TOM HOLLAND

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“We looked carefully, but saw no apparitions”

4: What do you think about most?

This is going to sound full of myself, but i think about myself alot. I just like to self reflect and try to improve whatever i think can be improved upon.

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

“No problem, I can try to make it work”

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

with. I live with too many people to be sleeping nude.

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I can scream EXACTLY like a horror movie. I had to pretend to be a murdered scream for this real life clue thing once and it was awesome

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls…. are absolutely goddesses and I fall in love with every one.

Boys…. are devilish jokers I wish I could stop falling for.

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

I think so? There’s a guy who likes me and would send me poems about “some mystery girl” who I’m like 98% sure is me

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

probs like last week

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

I have zoophobia actually, I love animals but they give me a huge amount of anxiety so I’ve been trying to get over it

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

I- I don’t know

13: What’s your religion?

I’m a christian, I actually got saved last year around this time!

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Swimming

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind. always.

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

Lately it’s been Sleeping at Last. They’re so calm but meaningful I love it

17: What was the last lie you told?

“Nooooooooooo, hahahahahaha, why would I like you???? No offense I mean you’re really… uhm. nevermind. no, I don’t” 

18: Do you believe in karma?

Abso-fuckin-lutely

19: What does your URL mean?

nothing really

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

I’ve been told they’re the same thing: I’m a really caring and sympathetic person which makes me good with people but also too trusting and gullible

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

TOM HOLLAND

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

no, but I lowkey really want to??? when I was little I read about it in nancy drew without even fully realizing what it was and I always wanted to try it

23: How do you vent your anger?

Usually by working out? I always joke that I don’t work out alot, but I bike/swim/walk/dance/do a ton of random muscle workouts pretty daily

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

I have a collection of lipsticks if that counts

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

it depends on the person, but I personally prefer video chatting just cause it’s easier to read body language

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

I feel like there’s ALOT of room to improve tbh

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

nails on a chalkboard ; dude anyone with a deep voice (no matter what they identify as) has my heart in a second of speaking

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

probably the usual “what if this had worked out” with a previous crush

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

yes. also yes. (don’t judge me)

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

my pillow and my bed

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

stale air. it is summer and hot. please send help.

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

this is gonna sound terrible, but probably in our car? I have so many bad memories and I hate driving it with a passion

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

west coast

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Shawn mendes, no doubt

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

Helping other people

36: Define Art.

An expression of emotion so strong it makes the viewer also feel emotion

37: Do you believe in luck?

yes

38: What’s the weather like right now?

hOt

39: What time is it?

early evening

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

yes, not yet cause I barely ever drive

41: What was the last book you read?

the Odesseye

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

no???

43: Do you have any nicknames?

Way too many. My latest was “miracle” given to me by a ton of adorable middle schoolers who couldn’t remember anything but the first three letters of my name

44: What was the last film you saw?

the greatest showman

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

A sprained ankle

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Yeah, it’s a long story but this one I think tried to have sex with my finger

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

dude I always do. Jane the Virgin is television gOLD

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Right now I identify as either bisexual or pansexual 

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

just small ones about who I like (that weren’t true and complicated friendships)

50: Do you believe in magic?

I don’t know

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

yeah, I’ve been trying to get better at it

52: What is your astrological sign?

Saggittarious

53: Do you save money or spend it?

I spend money way too easily, I’ve been trying to learn how to save more

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

A pretzel 

55: Love or lust?

love

56: In a relationship?

I wish

57: How many relationships have you had?

None that I’d like to count

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

nope

59: Where were you yesterday?

At a bonfire

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

ohhhhh yeah

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

nope

62: What’s your favourite animal?

cats.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

Friendship wise it’s just asking how their day is and asking if their doing okay. Romantic wise, I am soooo mean to people I like so usually just teasing them and buying them food

64: Where is your best friend?

right now at her home hopefully

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

@sophietheadventurer @s1n-am0n @darhwolf @undead-aesthetic @xqueenofpunsx

66: What is your heritage?

Mostly irish but my dad’s side has a heck of a lot of russian cause my great grandma is from Ukraine

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

sleeping like a wimp

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

mcdevil

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

Nope

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

I don’t know actually, I try to be the type of person I think a person NEEDS, so I would probs be pretty different if i was my friend

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

drown with the dog cause I can’t swim for crap but I’ll die trying

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) I would only tell a couple people at first, the rest I’d tell farther in b) spend time with my family and friends and travel a whole lot/probs write ALOT c) I’d be more sad I didn’t have more time with the people I care about

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

love, I already don’t have trust let’s be real

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Good old days by macklemore just cause it’s amazing 

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

I’d give them out but like I already have way too many unknown numbers calling me

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Two people who connect on a mental/emotional/spiritual level who can be completely themselves with each other and don’t have to spend all their time together, but cherish every single minute

77: How can I win your heart?

food and musicals

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

I think in a lot of ways it can, but that’s a whole debate in and of itself

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

coming back to the same summer camp every year

80: What size shoes do you wear?

7 and ½

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

“Now the only extra she is is dead”

82: What is your favourite word?

chimney (long story)

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

falling in love

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

“It’s not a look” or “oH honEy nO”

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

“God made girls” It’s been stuck in my head for ages

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

it changes almost daily but right now it’s a bright pink

87: What is your current desktop picture?

subtle gay art

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

That’s a hard question, too many horrible people alive

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

Someone irl asking my sexuality (i am very very deep in the closet)

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Probs go back to bed I’m a tired chick man

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Telepathy

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

this one specific car ride I had with my sister when I was younger

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

my entire life as a thirteen year old

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

tie between Kesha and Shawn Mendes

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Greece

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

not that I know of but most likely yeah

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

wayyyyy too many times

98: Ever been on a plane?

yes

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

I would probably freeze up and say nothing

#long post #asks #answered #thanks dude #this actually helped me calm down alot