#i know he’s a phat homo

[selznick-writes-stuff]

There's Only One Can of Tango!

Haikyu!! fanfic

Desperate times call for deserate measures. And this is definately a desperate time! Only one can of tango after practice to share between two thirsting teens… Will Bros just remain bros? Or will this life-changing experience lead to new relationships?

Daichi had left the two 'bros' to clean and lock up by themselves. An awful idea really but you don't look a gift horse in the mouth. If Tanaka had volenteered to lock up then Tanaka can, and Daichi can get some well-deserved sleep and ignore whatever plan him and Noya were no doubt putting in action at this very moment. The truth that Daichi would never know is that Tanaka only asked to lock up so he could be a super-duper, awe-inspiring senpai to the braindead-to-all-but-volleyball, first year, wonder duo. It might have worked if Daichi didn't also dump all the cleaning on them and took the rest of the team for meat buns!

So exhausted from practice and lacking the sustinance of meat buns the boys lunged into Noya's bag to eat grab a can of the energizing soft drink Tango. Refreshing. Or it would have been if Tanaka hadn't challeneged Noya to a drinking match. Noya won - on account of Tanaka spilling it down his shirt.

"Ughhh, Bro! Now my shirt is all sticky!" Tanaka groaned as he swiftly removed his shirt and slammed it to the floor. "Bro! Have you been working out more? There's gotta be more muscles than last time I saw!" Noya yelled. The last time Noya saw Tanaka with his shirt removed was, in fact, earlier that day; Tanaka's spike had hit the ceiling and was certainly a cause for celebration. "Oh yeah, bro, you know it! I'm gonna get even more while cleaning the gym - another workout for me, bro!" "No way bro! I'm gonna get way more muscles cleaning than you!"

And with that, the pair set off, using way more energy than nesseccery. And so by the end of it neither 'bro' had more muscles (as cleaning a gym is hardly a proper workout) but both 'bros' were extremly exhausted and dripping with sweat; their mouths a dersert. They knew what they needed - Tango!

Noya rolling thundered to his bag, hand plunging in hastily. One can retrieved. The hand went back in. Nothing. No, that couldn't be right... Left corner - nothing. Right corner - nothing. Left coner again - nothing! Right corner again - nothing!

There wasn't another Tango in his bag!

"Bro! Code 53!" Noya called out. "Code 53? How serious, bro?!" Tanaka was concerned - Code 53 meant panic! "Well, bro, there's only one can of tango..."

Tanaka screamed: an extremely manly and very fitting of the situation scream. Noya dived (as a libero it brought him great comfort). They paniced some more. Then, like trained dogs that just heard a command, they turned to look at the single can of Tango sat beside Noya's bag. A sinister thought crept into each's head.

Grab the can and chug.

But they couldn't do that to a 'bro'! No, a 'bro' couldn't be hurt due to their selfish desire for a drink. But if left a conundrum: both parched, both 'bros' and only one can of Tango to quench their thirst between them.

"I know what we have to do," Noya said slowly aproaching the can, "we have to share it, bro." Noya opened the can, it was the only sound in the whole gymnasium. "But bro, then we'd indirectly kiss," Tanaka pointed out the next serious point to consider. It was true - if they shared the can then it would be the site of an indirect kiss between 'bros'.

Both 'bros' considered just saying no homo, bro but it would be a lie for both. And 'bros' don't lie to each other. See: both Tanaka and Noya had a phat, full homo crush on the other but neither would admit it in fear of loosing their 'bro'. Both stood their, brains festering over these thoughts as they stared at the only can of Tango. Noya spoke first.

"What if we... What if we directly kissed then an indirect kiss wouldn't matter, bro?" "Bro, if we directly kissed then I couldn't in clear conscience tell you no homo, bro." "I couldn't either, bro..."

Both stared sadly at the ground. They couldn't drink the Tango and just saty 'bros'. Wait- did he just say a kiss would be homo for him? How homo could it be between 'bros'? Well, no homo, they both knew that... so did he mean-?

Tanaka slammed his lips against Noya's in the most homo, no bromo, direct kiss of the century. Noya recieved the kiss perfectly (he was the best libero afterall) and returned it to the spiker. This was great for the former 'bros' and possibly now 'boyfriends' but absolutly terrible for Ennoshita, who had returned to give them their meatbuns and was instead now watching they explore each others mean buns.

"Dachi said to give you these. And that I should take the keys from you since he doesn't trust you both not to loose them." With that Ennoshita plucked up the keys, threw them out of the gym, locked up and went home. The can of Tango Suga had promised him was not worth this.

#fanfic #fanfiction #haikyuu #haikyū!! #nishinoya yuu #tanaka ryuunosuke #nishinoya x tanaka #sawamura daichi #ennoshita chikara #sugawara koushi #requited love #its like theres only one bed but actually its a can of tango #full homo no bromo

[kingprinceleo]

SHADOW!! IM THE FIRST ONE TO SAY IT!!

Yes you are!!! sexuality headcanon- certified gay homo man, and demisexual

otp- sonadow, all of my major ships in any circumstance are grumpyxhappy and boy do those two appeal to it

brotp-br u h-- i cant pick, all the gamers would be bestest buddies in their own way him and knuckles being fish out of water dunces together him n amy bonding over food and photos and pink shadow and tails my beloved, mysterious cool older brother figure that brings his cool motorcycle over sometimes and listens to tails ramble for hours Shadow and rouge family unit, absolute chaos every day Shadow and Omega, Cain instinct

notp- Shadow and Amy, the age gap is a phat yikes to me. Shadow and Rouge, it has been firmly cemented in my brain that team dark is a family unit and i could never see them romantically, also again with the age gap. 2 years is my *hard* limit for minor characters. Also!!! Shadow and Maria! they are siblings!! 

first headcanon that pops into my head- autism, by extension crab hyperfixation

one way in which i relate to this character- does the autism count--- but actually uh probably that hes usually lost and confused and doesn't know what's fucking happening

thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character- death to all who oppose me, hes a silly boy who says cringe things sometimes because he thinks hes cool

#my asks #ask game

[mammonrule34]

All those years ago (chapter one)

Characters: William Afton x Henry Emily

Warning: NSFW

Disclaimer!: this is a shitpost me and the other writer are not at all taking this seriously.

Henry is looking at William blushing he-he knew he wanted him now even though he killed those children all those years ago.

He walked over to William over to the closet. knowing what he wanted (he wanted that big phat juicy d!ck). William angrily shouted “Wtf you dumb ass bitch i’m trying to kill kidz.” Henry aggressively got down on his knees “You know what I want babe” He started pulling down William’s pants. William doesn’t know how he feels at the moment. His best friend was trying to fuck him in their pizzeria like wtf dude. “Just take off my effing pants whore.” William decided he liked the attention Henry was giving him, but William hated the tease. “chillax sugar tits, i’ll suck you off, as long as you be good boy uwu.” Henry smirked as William let out sigh. Henry finally had Willy’s pants off and then quickly took his undergarments.

Henry’s eyes widened at the size of his penis. He began to feel intermediated by it. “are you gonna blow me or not.” Henry snapped back into focus and looked back at William. “uh huh, yeah just be patient dear.” Henry nervously chuckled. William got impatient and pushed him all the way down on his pp (hehe pp) Henry started to gag as William started to moan in pleasure, “Damn you can take some inches ya slut” he continues to moan as Henry kept going down on his pp. (smutty smut smut smut, you get it they both cum the end now go away )They walked out of the closet and William said seductively “No homo” then he gracefully walked away like a god who’s pp just got sucked ( oh wait)

THE END ?

#fnaf fanfic #william afton #henry emily #william x henry #william afton smut #fnaf fandom