#i hate not having a license so much

[kiwidotcom]

my hobbies include : vibing, chillaxing, and hanging out

#im running out of busable hikes #i hate not having a license so much #my face #selfie #nature #hike #pnw #Vancouver #vancity

[notfernintheslighest]

holy trinity of plot amor

(also i love how in My Babysitters a Vampire they give Erica a truck load of blood, and yet she still eats that wrestler three episodes later; Hannibal wishes he served food as well as Erica serves cunt.)

#benny and ethan luck out so much #how is everything in ethan’s fucking backyard #also if House was real he would have had his medical license revoked immediately #would not have passed #will has magic #let’s be so fucking fr #hannigram #bethan #hilson #only the sexy vampires survived #i know the murder husbands lived #but so did benny and ethan technically #they’re just MIA #my babysitter's a vampire #hannibal nbc #hatecrimes md #hate crimes md #house md #venn diagram #media comparison #hannibal

[gumy-shark]

<- god's wettest most pathetic most stressed most anxious beast btw

#i have a flight in 2 days and i hate airports they stress me out so much too many people *vine boom* #i lost my driver's license last month so i'm gonna have to get through the tsa without legal photo ID *vine boom* #the flight takes off at 7am meaning im gonna have to wake up at like 4 to get there *vine boom* #it also means i need to stay the night tomorrow with some family friends i barely know *vine boom* #so i need to do laundry and email teachers and shit Tonight *vine boom* #my ride busted a tire and got stranded in the middle of nowhere so now i have to worry abt his safety and also find a new ride *vine boom* #AND I'VE GOT A FUCKING LAB DUE TOMORROW #so now im just doing homework and daily tasks and whatnot walking around all chill like i dont feel like the most stressed being alive #conclusion: oh shit the Creature is back

[angelsdean]

ᴄᴀꜱᴛɪᴇʟ, ᴀɴɢᴇʟ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴜʀꜱᴅᴀʏꜱ

The name Castiel means "God's Shield." He is the angel of Thursdays, protector and friend of the Winchesters, father to the nephilim, Jack Kline, and lover of humanity.

Castiel, or just "Cas", was stationed on Earth for thousands of years before he defied his fellow angels to help avert the first Apocalypse. He rescued me from Hell and returned me to life, reconstructed my body and left his handprint behind as a physical representation of the bond we share. He fought beside me when the two of us were trapped in Purgatory. After Metatron stripped him of his grace, he was human for a time, and lost the use of his wings along with all the other angels expelled from heaven.

He has helped us, saved us, betrayed us, healed us, and left us...but he's always returned. He is my comrade in arms, and the best friend I have in the world. I know he will always have our backs, no matter what, and we'll always have his. He's family.

Cas gave up his life to save me, one last time, but that's not the end. I'm coming for you, Cas. I love you.

--Dean 

#ok creator notes: so i wanted to do a re-imagining of despair / cas being taken by the empty and also draw on those parallels to cas's intro #also. my anti-late-seasons-trenchcoat meant i absolutely HAD to use his original coat in this bc the parallels and. i hate that other coat ! #i hate that coat so much jdfjkhd. anyways i also wanted to give him his wings back and just make him look cool ok #finally. the prayer card aspect was like. a Vision i've had for a while and wanted to finally bring to fruition #and of course i had to have dean write the card description ! i took a lot of it from the entry he writes in the Men of Letters Bestiary #but obvs made some changes took those creative licenses lol #deancas #destiel #15x18 #spn 15x18 #despair #castiel #edits #myedits

[lycanthian]

gonna be 19 in less than a week. its hitting me. girl what tha fuck.

#i dont even know if this is a bad thing its just scary #ive gotten a couple goals in for the year? getting a boyfriend and opening commissions being the main two #but it feels like ive spent most of the past year struggling with depression and debilitating anxiety and. ueagh #ive spentnso much time feeling awful and hating myself and not enough time enjoying myself. #i still struggle with doing basic tasks both hobbywise and selfcare wise and just. ueaagh. #i feel gross and annoying and difficult to get along with and awkward and lazy and. uaaaghhhggh #itsso bad rn i cant even put into words how im feeling properly #ive been teetering back and forth on the edge of a depressive spiral a la december 2023 for the past month #and imscared im gonna hit that again. and not have a way to cope and rest through it this time #because i have finals and portfolio stuff and im moving #and i have to help my friend make sure that shes going to have a place to live over the summer #and i have to get my drivers license and i have to get working on community service hours and i have so so so so so much to do and. weh #im scared i wont be able to do any of it #lycan howls

[skunkes]

relearning to drive isnt so great, cheye finally driving seems about as likely as my plan b for transportation (waiting for the whole of the US to invest in good public transport)

#talkys #im never gonna get out of here even if i do find a job bc i hate driving so much #i hate it and then i cant even be assed to practice bc theres no where to go here. and its 115°. #i havent driven in over a month i hate it #Disclaimer bc it comes up every time i post about driving: i have my license i just never had a vehicle to use until now

[writeouswriter]

Bro, this whole driving thing ain't it, release the secret to teleportation NOW

#i hate driving so much oh my god i've been putting off getting my license for literal ever #but being in the middle of nowhere it sucks not having one/is impossible not having one #but hating driving and the way others drive and how fast your reaction times gotta be makes having one suck just as much #not writing #driving #i don't want to continue the course i hate it here #but i also hate not being able to go anywhere #i hate car dependent society i'm gonna build a pair of wings and fly into the sun

[binders-and-beanies]

.

#cops tw #bro I cannot handle one more thing happening istg #got pulled over on my way home after a 13 hour day #was already scared to drive at night and that just confirmed that I’m right to be scared #it was for running a red light n it was one of those situations of just not having time to stop on yellow #I was fully aware as it was happening that I was either going to slam on my brakes in the intersection or run a red and I could see the cop #so I knew I was getting pulled over either way I just hoped the yellow would be longer than .5 seconds. not so lucky #except I also Am so lucky bc he let me off with a warning #ig bc I don’t have any sort of serious history + with it being 420 once he saw I was sober he prob went easier #it’s the second time I’ve been pulled over in my life tho and it’s scary bc this is the first time since the accident #which maybe that was also ok bc it wasn’t my fault #I just know every warning or unlucky moment costs u more in the future if u happen to get unlucky again #like I know I got out of that bc I’m white. it was still a scary moment bc there were multiple cop cars #so it’s like is this guy abt to ruin my life am I gonna lose my license for being at the wrong place wrong time #when I’m already salty to be driving this late involuntarily #so it’s like I got unlucky And very very lucky #I just hate the confirmation that u can get pulled over at any given moment #I constantly rehearse every possible convo w cops in my head bc if u come off disabled u can die #or get arrested or whatever #and then they like don’t follow the script and u didn’t expect this to happen to u today anyway and I get flustered #anyway my point is. I’m fucking exhausted and too many things keep happening #it’s long day after long day w no end in sight rn and I’m like half asleep every day #I just want to sleep. without feeling like I’m already tired tomorrow #it’s too much. just all of it #and on top of it all. it’s 420 so the whole dorm building is basically a cloud of weed #happy u guys are having fun but u are physically harming me in my home #mine #txt #vent post #personal

[levi-dayne]

being autistic -> 🫠

vent in tags

#im so fucking burnt out #its so frustrating bc according to my parents im 'high functioning' and 'shouldnt let my autism impact me that much' #beyond that being outdated like they didnt just slap an autism label on me for FUN. its bc i fucking have autism #so yes i have difficulties related to my autism. they dont understand and its so frustrating theyre always on my ass about things i CANT do #or struggle doing bc im autistic and burnt out and i hate this so much #and i called my mom out on it and she said 'well i didnt say you dont struggle just that it should be manageable' #okay but its fucking not??????? #like i stg they think my autism is JUST special interests and sensory issues. which its fucking not. #i struggle taking care of myself. i struggle interacting with people. i struggle with keeping up with things or switching between tasks #and dont even get me started on my DAD he doesnt even believe the doctors that im autistic #he compared my inability to understand social cues to wanting to be a bitch but being forced to repress it #like dude. when people perceive me as being a bitch its not bc im failing at hiding it #its bc i genuinely cant tell if my words or body language is coming across as bitchy even when i dont have any underlying resentment #he doesnt even think im autistic which is so frustrating #my mom begrudgingly accepts it but my dad thinks the LICENSED PROFESSIONALS are wrong #he hasn't done ANY research on autism EXCEPT to correct me when i say autism instead of autism spectrum disorder #which is also bullshit bc he and my mom use outdated terms like aspergers all the fucking time #(and ableist slurs) #im just so overwhelmed and i cant function #personal posts 😌✨️✨️

[tariah23]

That stylist that charged that little 6 year old girl $700 to do her hair is going to hell-

#mannn sm black stylists are delusional if I’m being honest #‘it’s just a lot of hair to work with-‘ you’re not a professional put away the tools #most of these stylists will try to charge you $300 just to wash/dry your hair when that should already be part of the styling process #sm of them try to get over man #I hate that they do that to other black ppl just because they know that they can get away with it #rambling #nbs don’t touch #please #this is ridiculous man I feel so bad for that child and idk what the mom was thinking paying that much #most of these ppl aren’t even licensed and treat being a stylist like your typical 9 to 5 #and overcharge like hell #it’s highway robbery #the racists unfortunately found that tweet and are calling the little girl blackie so 🚶🏾‍♀️ #‘if the blackies want to have straight hair like ours-‘ bullshit what else is new #I hate wp sm bro

[dogrocks]

finally having the aspiration to get my drivers license so i can be finally legible to work at a dog boarding kennel that i’ve been wanting to work at for years

#meows #was on the bus the other day thinking about how much i hate cars and contemplating if i should even bother with having a license #then i see the kennel as it drives past with a big banner saying Now Hiring and i was like. oh fucking hell #it’s rotten work but good god #i miss working with animals so bad oh my goddddd

[mishkakagehishka]

But i'll be real with you gang, i don't get the Point. Protect history, but you're going back in time to defeat the hra who are also going back in time to change history it will never end unless you destroy the hra as an organisation bc they can spend a decade regrouping, if they're still gonna return to 1582 to save nobunaga or whatever it is that they do. You can't just protect history from attempts to change it, you have to destroy the source of revisionism itself by attacking the hra.

#no but i'm serious you can only do so much to protect history. it's time to attack for history. #and thus korka had her saniwa license taken and was told to leave the honmaru because apparently #revolution and massacre at the enemy base is not an accepted form of protecting history. #bc i was thinking ab the ''we have to protect history no matter what'' scenes from the anime that was like #ooo inner conflict bc no matter how much you hate to see your former owner die you cannot save him #bc that would make you on hra's side right #but like if it takes 50 or 100 years for the hra to become stronger if they return to the past it'll be like no time at all has passed #or maybe i just don't get The Lore #day xxx of being a saniwa i have rallied my touken danshi on a direct assault on the hra base #maybe the problem is that the hra's base is unknown

[st5lker]

god i wish i was the type of person who could just be creative for myself. but if i dont have people to engage with my ideas and/or multiple people to make things with in collaboration i just dont want to do it at all. and at this point in my life i literally dont know where i could find any more people like that now that ive fallen out with everyone i used to... its hard to tell how much that's what i miss and how much what i miss might just be being a kid with a big imagination. but like i just cant make things for fun anymore and it makes me so fucking sad because in my heart what i enjoy doing more than anything else is drawing and writing and thinking about characters and plotlines just for fun and having people to share my ideas with in a way that they can really engage with them beyond 'oh that looks nice!'

#ive been so depressed lately i dont even want to leave bed #i thought having a break would be nice but it just made me realize that i never actually got happier ive just been too busy to think about- #how unhappy i actually am #for the past 8 or 9 months since i got stripped from basically all creative outlets ive just been distracting myself with one thing after an #and now that i finally have a moment where im not actively working towards something (whether that's my license or school or whatever) #its just me and my thoughts and im left realizing how much i fucking hate not having anyone or anything to be creative for

[oscarpiastriwdc]

last night i dreamed i was taking the MPRE (ethics exam required for law license in us) and I was sitting next to oscar who was also taking the MPRE but I had already taken it and passed so I was really mad that I was there so I spent the whole time ranting about how the MPRE is a stupid test that doesn’t actually prove anything. Not really sure how to interpret this dream ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#yesterday one of my friends who’s still in law school was talking about the MPRE so it must have been on my mind #love the ways my subconscious combines the things I think about before bed (Oscar piastri and how much I hate the law licensing system)

[hpdgirlfriend]

goddd i fucking hate my legal name i hate it i hate it why did my mom have to give me such an ugly and super fucking uncommon name like i have never heard of anyone else w my name in my fucking life i hate it!! i hate that its so easily identifiable i hate it even if it was something i still didnt like couldnt you at least have chosen something more common i have such bad paranoia witg this shit

#ive been able to avoid it besides my fucking family refusing to call me by my middle name instead because they never respect me ever #but when (if lol) i get a drivers license its going to be on there. its bad enough i have to see my ugly fucking face but i #hate my name even more its going to make me so fucking upset every time #literally having a breakdown because i had to write it in something Once just now. insane and pathetic it should not upset me this much

[running-in-the-dark]

my (virtual) meeting with my thesis advisor is in... 7 hours. I'm sort of almost finished writing the exposé that I was supposed to write. sort of. I'll probably need another hour or two until I feel okay enough about it to actually get any sleep.

unfortunately my left arm is realllly starting to hurt and I can't lift it much anymore (thanks to the covid booster I got today). hopefully I'll get it done anyway. and hopefully the pain won't be so bad that I can't sleep.

#I mean. if I get... idk like 3-4 hours of sleep that should be enough #I only have to be awake until the meeting is over. then I'll probably go back to bed. #and that way if it goes really really badly I can escape from that by being asleep lol #I hope it'll be okay 😭 I'm so scared #but it's this... much more quiet subtle kind of scared. I never experienced that before the anxiety meds #so it feels weird. #I haven't even cried yet! no panic attacks or anything! there have been a few meltdowns but not specifically about this #so I have to keep reminding myself that this is fine! I can handle this! it used to be sooooo much worse and I somehow got through that too #so I will definitely get through this and it will be okay #after all - no matter what happens. I'll be done with uni in February. I won't have to speak to my advisor ever again (so if he thinks I'm a #fucking idiot it doesn't matter at all!) #this is far from the hardest thing I've done! I was my dad's carer. I got my driver's license (yes that was very hard for me). I was in #therapy. I lived in abusive households until I was 25! this is easy in comparison #it just feels hard because I can't stand the feeling of being judged. and this is. just. me being judged (for what I write) #but it will be okay and I'll never write anything like this ever again and I'll get a break and I'll find a job I don't hate and it'll all #be worth it #personal #posts about my thesis