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#i guess i need to find a way of telling people that i'm in that headspace in the first place
6ix9inewiturmom · 3 days
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Camera Caught- Matt Sturniolo
Summary: you accidentally left some hickeys on matt’s neck and the fans catch it, start making edits, and matt “punishes” you
Warnings: SMUT, degradation, orgasm denial, multiple orgasms, squirting, oral (female receiving), P in V, Unprotected sex, praising, slight crying.
A/N: I LOVE YOU ALL ENJOYY
PSA: I GIVE NO RIGHTS TO COPY MY WORK OR USE MY WORK FOR “INSPIRATION”
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Matt and I’s relationship has been very very private, we've been trying to keep it that way till we both collectively agreed to go public. Matt was down in the garage filming for a Friday video and I was endlessly scrolling on TikTok, I came across this edit of Matt, I didn't think much of it till i saw the comments.
Mattscupsupremacy: THE HICKEY?! WHO IS SHE?? MATTS A FREAKY GAL
Chrissypoohmylover: UHM MATTHEW?? what a freaky man.. she’s one lucky girl to be getting that fire dick
Nickismyqueen: WHY IS NO ONE POINTING OUT THE FACT HES NOT EVEN TRYING TO COVER IT UP??
Yamother6629: we lost another one girls… Funeral at my place at 6 pm tmr 😔💔
Thefourthtriplet5239: MATT SEEMED SO VANILLA.. who would ever guess that man is kinky?
“No no no” I say panicking out loud and immediately jumping out of bed and running through the house and busting the door open to the garage where Nick, Matt, and Chris are barging into the garage which sends the boys into an immediate panic
“Okay so you can edit this out of the video but it's an emergency,” I say out of breath.
“Girl go the fuck on, you said it’s an emergency, spill let’s go” Nick says snapping his fingers.
“Okay, patience, so I was scrolling through TikTok like normally waiting for you guys to finish filming and I scroll across this Matt edit,” I say trying to find the edit on my phone.
“Y/N how many times do I have to tell you to stop watching edits of me, I'm right here no need to fangirl over me,” Matt says with a sense of cockyness in his voice.
“No no hold on it gets better, so I scroll through the comments cause you know it's funny watching as the 12-year-olds talk about you being their ‘baby’-” start before Chris cut me off
“GET TO THE FUCKING POINT YAPPER,” Chris says throwing his hands in the air
“Says the one who goes on about putting a literal tit milk-drinking infant in the backseat of a car with no car seat. So let's not talk about her yapping” nick defends.
“ANYWAYS, Matt you forgot to cover your hickeys from the other night and everyone knows about it now, cause when you moved out of frame your hoodie must have come down, and there are edits and people calling you ‘vanilla’ whatever the hell that means, and like everyone is wondering who the girl is and I'm like panicking now,” I say with panic in my voice “I know you weren't ready to go public but everyone is like freaking the fuck out” I continue.
“Fuck, I thought the hoodie was a good cover” matt sighs “look its fine well figure it out after I'm done filming just go back inside and calm the hell down” he gives me a quick peck on my forehead and shutting the door of the car.
A couple of minutes later I got a text from matt, normally he does send me the occasional ‘i love you, almost done filming’ message but this one was a little different.
Matty B Rapz 💍
you’re in big trouble for getting us caught
i hope you ain’t tired cause you’re in for a long night
This wasn't out of the normal for Matt to be rough with me but over text? This is new, but I love it. I could feel myself getting soaked at all the possible ways Matt could fuck me, all the positions, thinking of all the ways in which he could make me cum.
After an hour and a half of endless scrolling through TikTok, I can hear the footsteps of Matt through the hallway.
“Hi baby, how was filming?” I say as he walks in the door immediately shutting it and locking it.
“Don't ‘baby’ me, strip,” he says harshly as his eyes darken with lust.
A smirk appeared on my lips, and moved off the bed walking towards him as I placed my phone down on the bedside table and slowly and teasingly removed my pants and shirt leaving me in my light pink lingerie set that I knew drove him insane, the way it hugged my curves, pushed my Brests up with a small delicate flower in the middle, and my underwear that sat and hung onto my hips with another small flower in the middle of it.
“So fucking sexy,” Matt says under his breath causing a light shade of pink to appear on my cheeks.
Matt wraps his arms around my torso and unclips my bra letting my breasts fall and the straps of my bra fall off my arms. He lightly pushes me back so I'm sitting on our shared bed as he places a deep and passionate kiss on my lips.
I yearn for more of his lips but he pulls away from me and starts trailing light kisses down my jaw and to my neck and sucking harshly on my neck so we have matching marks on my neck and soft moans escaping my lips.
“Since you had to go and get us caught,” he starts before sucking harsher in my neck in a pattern this time. “Everyone's gonna know who you belong to now” he pulls away walking back a couple of steps to admire the marks he left on my neck.
‘M’
His initial was spelled out on my neck.
“And you're not gonna cover that up. Got it?” he spits walking towards me and wrapping his hand around my neck.
“Yes, Matt” I whisper out
“Good fucking girl” he removes his hand from my neck and pushes me down so my back is now on the bed flat.
He lowers his body down, basically on his knees, and he leaves kisses down my stomach before kissing over my clothed pussy and a soft whimper comes out of my lips.
Using his teeth he guides my underwear off my legs and throws them on the floor with a smirk plastered on his face.
His face between my legs was always a sight for sore eyes, never failed to turn me on the way his blue eyes always stared at me through his eyelashes. He places small kisses around my thighs eventually making his way down to my dripping pussy and placing kisses everywhere around it but where I need him the most.
“Matt, please” I plead.
“What are you begging for? Use that filthy mouth of yours and tell me what you want” he says harshly.
“I need your mouth, please” i whine.
He smirks and uses his tongue to move up and down my folds collecting my juices he lets out a groan as the taste of my pussy touches his tongue. His lips attach to my clit sucking harshly on it.
“FUCK MATT” My back arches and my eyes roll back basically seeing my brain.
His tongue explores every inch of me as he keeps a steady gaze on me and how my body reacts to his mouth. His fingers trail into my begging hole that's clenched around the air begging to be fulfilled curling his slim fingers upward reaching a spot I could never reach by myself.
“MATT” I scream out as My thighs close his head in.
“Legs stay open” he mutters through my pussy.
His fingers now moving at a pace that's driving me absolutely insane, his muted moans against my pussy is only turning me on more.
“close” i breathe out trying not to strain my voice.
“hold it,” he says muttering against me as his nose flicks my clit digging his face deeper into my pussy. He was almost moaning as much as I was, typically he didn't even care if he cums, he gets off at watching me come unglued from his mouth or fingers.
“Please” I repeat pleading with matt.
“No, you're gonna hold it and you're gonna show me how much of a good girl you can be” he lifts his head continuing his pace with his fingers.
His gaze never left me, the way my back arched off the bed and my eyes rolled back just at his fingers was always so amusing to him.
“You always look so beautiful wrapped around my fingers,” he says smirking down at me and taking his lower lip between his teeth as he continues to arch his fingers inside me.
“PL-PLEA- CUM” i mutter unable to form a coherent sentence.
“Go ahead baby, let it all out” he coos in my ear in a low raspy voice.
The knot in my stomach snaps, and my orgasm hits me like a bus, my legs shake as my cum drips down into his fingers. he removes his fingers licking off my cum from them.
“Face down ass up, I ain't done with you” he says sternly.
I slowly nod turning around and holding myself up by my elbows taunting my ass around in the air. Matt smirks to himself removes his hoodie, and quickly removes his boxers and pants throwing all his clothes somewhere in the room.
I feel the bed dip down from the weight of his knees behind me. He reaches his arm around to my mouth places his hand below my mouth.
“Spit” he says harshly.
I obey spitting in his hand as he uses my spit to rub around the tip of his cock moving his hand up and down to coat his cock.
Matt aligns himself with my entrance and immediately bottoms out letting a loud groan escape his lips as my hips jerk backward and a loud whine leaks from my lips.
“You think you're so fucking innocent huh? Leaving those fucking hickeys on my neck” he spits thrusting harshly into me gripping onto my hair and pushing my head far into the mattress.
“I-im SO-SORRY” I scream into the mattress.
“Oh, you're sorry? If you were sorry you wouldn't be creaming all over my fucking. dick.” he says thirsting harder to annunciate his last two words as his head hangs low to look down at the white rim that's formed around the base of his cock.
“FUCKK” I whine out with tears starting to form in my eyes from the overstimulation. “CANT- CANT-TAKE” I muffle out as his hand pushes my head farther in the bed.
“You wanted this” he grunts “You take it” his hand travels down my body and starts to toy with my sensitive clit.
“OH BABY-” i scream out as my cervix begins to twitch around his cock signaling how close I was.
“Oh you think you're gonna cum soon?” he taunts rubbing faster on my clit as his thrusts begin getting sloppier.
“Pl-pl-please” I whisper yell to him.
“You're so fucking pathetic” he groans out using both hands and pressing my waist down the bed and rolling his hips into me getting deeper and kissing my cervix with his cock.
My legs began to shake and tremble “CLOSE” i choke out. his grip on my waist loosens up as he leans down and kisses my back.
“let it go, baby, let it all out” With that, the knot in my stomach breaks and I squirt all over the bed leaving a wet mess beneath me. “God damn baby you're so fucking sexy” he leaves small kisses on my neck as his thrusts got even sloppier.
“Oh fuck” he buries his head in my neck and groans as his cum begins to shoot out of him filling my hole of his cum.
He softly pulls out of me rolling me over now laying on my back and gives me a soft peck on the lips.
“Let me clean you up, yeah?” he smiles down at me and I shoot him a small smile back.
He throws on the same pair of sweatpants from earlier and walks softly and carefully to the bathroom wetting a small rag and bringing it back into the room.
“You did amazing, Y/N” he smiles up at me as he carefully runs the warm wash rag down my legs and anywhere else that was covered in cum.
“I am sorry about getting us caught, I know that we didn't want to go public just yet” I softly whisper as he makes his way next to me bringing me into his arms and placing a kiss down on my head.
“Hey, don't worry about it. We'll figure it out in the morning. But for now, just get some sleep," he says, running his fingers through my hair and occasionally kissing my head. We eventually drifted asleep, intertwined with each other.
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A/N PT 2 HI LOVES!! IDK how to feel ab this one but i hope you guys enjoyed it! I hope you're doing amazing!! And have an amazing day/night/evening!!
Xoxo
Gabs 💋
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catboymoments · 3 days
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Me: Asks you to educate yourself, providing easy access to videos that, turns out, directly address the issues that make you dislike vivziepop and provide more context than tumblr and twitter hate threads ever do
You responded to that quickly I know you didn't bother watching. Bruh. I told you a lot of the hate around Vivziepop isn't valid and you don't check it out? See if any of your concerns fell under the one video I directly recommended?? The creator had timestamps too.
Going to the video would have told you the one nazi oc was from eight years ago. And it wasn't even hers! The Vivziepop drama playlist goes in depth about the updates concerning the people Vivziepop has worked with. Which SEVERAL people that worked with her came out to defend her and provide their experiences
You'd find out if you had just watched the videos, the proof, that people love to hate on Vivizie for clout and to farm likes and attention. They take screenshots out of context, go on tangents without proof, etc.
And expect you to believe them.
SO I'll do this one more time to address what specifically you said you disliked about Vivzie.
This playlist has all the videos I will talk about and more. So, if you know of any other drama and controversy surrounding Vivziepop you should probably consult that before forming your opinion: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOWIXPh0p7CzgQoUIl7rqd8oz2Ym6V9XY&si=lhDApDPhX5sWyTHA
Again, it can be found by typing into the Youtube search bar, "ayy lmao vivziepop drama"
You'll find their playlist "Vivziepop Drama Playlist" right there or even just going to the youtube channel "Ayy Lmao" and looking through the playlists.
Specifically addressing what makes you dislike Vivziepop:
The one Nazi oc, the only one to exist, is discussed in "Why everyone hates Vivziepop" at 20:07 and in "The Truth Behind Vivziepop" at 5:07 The latter has more information on that and it only takes TWO MINUTES to watch! With screenshots and proof and everything.
If you heard somewhere that there were multiple, did where you heard that have a source? To, y'know, back up the claim? If you can find it that would be lovely otherwise that is just an allegation either someone told you or you are misremembering.
The drama concerning their workplace goes mainly from the beginning of the playlist to "Vivziepop Erin Frost Drama Round 3"
Multiple artists and people that worked with Vivziepop come out in support of Vivziepop and debunk claims made by others in "Helluva boss employees debunk Vivziepop allegations (Vivziepop drama Part 4)"
I'm not sure what you are referring to when you say "the way she treats her friends" and since you haven't provided any sort of source I can only guess that you may be thinking about the ugly situation covered in "Vivziepop Spindlehorse Drama Explained"
I can already tell by the amount of people responding to the first ask I sent that you have a platform, at least a larger audience compared to the average user. If you have problems with x y and z thing about Vivziepop, provide links and proof to what concerns you in the future.
If you don't remember or can't find that proof. Watch the videos. That simple. Put it on in the background, educate yourself, before you spread any more misinformation. Please.
Then form your opinion. It's a lot and I know it is a lot but you need to know this before jumping on the bandwagon of canceling someone. Especially if you have a large audience.
Vivziepop drama and hatedom is so exhausting you wouldn't BELIEVE IT. People are constantly spewing hate without providing PROOF. THEY'RE ALLEGATIONS! Even with "proof" most are out of context and bad faith. There is a motive to lie about someone as well known as Vivziepop
I'm not asking you to like her I'm asking you to educate yourself before repeating what you've heard and provide sources to back them up.
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yasmeensh · 3 days
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Book rant? Anthropology, apes, and racism discussion.
I started reading a book titled "Bonobo Handshake" by Vanessa Woods. I picked it up because a) I want to learn more about bonobos since my knowledge of them is minimal. b) the author had interacted with bonobos in person so it's an interesting perspective to read. c) the book had positive reviews.
I was not expecting the author to start off telling us about the 'discovery' of bonobos in this way.
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W-what do you mean, in Belgium? The author makes it clear that bonobos live in Congo and she gives us a few examples of local bonobo lore. Meaning, people in Congo know the bonobos very well. Way to go to give a colonizer the credit??? wtf. In this perspective, she is letting us know THAT was the moment when Bonobos entered western science, which is true. But I was really hoping the author would give it a more holistic view than this, but it seems she really believes in this??? And let me tell you, from what I am picking up between the lines, she ONLY accepts western science. Here is an example:
This is the page that confuses me immensely. I don't know if she is trying to come off as sarcastic or not. She sets out for us that Takayoshi Kano is the star of Bonobo research, but in the next paragraph says there is no one studying Bonobos. "there was never a Jane Goodall or Dian Fossey for bonobos." UHM NO? YOU JUST SAID THERE WAS???
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[highlighting and writing over a picture of the page (32) since it's a library book and I can't write on it.]
She says Japanese researchers are responsible for all we know on Bonobos, but then starts talking about de Waal's zoo discoveries in detail, and they seem pretty minor compared to Kano's work with wild bonobos. She did point out that scientists don't take de waal's observations seriously because it's from a zoo, but she doesn't remedy that by telling us if it can be supported by Kano's work or not when compared. Kano is ignored. He does have one book available in English, so it's not like we can't ever learn about what he observed. you said western mainstream media don't want to listen to a man who only spoke Japanese??? UHM. You are too??? Why did you jump to de waal? If it's a book about bonobos, then please give Kano a little spotlight and tell about his research. (I actually want to read Kano's book now but I can't find a borrowable copy of it. It's a complicated long loop to get one. But it's possible T-T!!!!)
I very much dislike her tone in 'oh it's the Japanese that tell us about bonobo'. It is as if no one is actually researching them at all. They are 'foreign' so it doesn't count. Meanwhile, if it's a white person's discovery, it is humanity's. But if it's someone else theeennnn well we are not sure if it's actually real :/ Not until a white person observes this can we really put this into humanity's archive of knowledge. Otherwise, whatever they learnt is not very important or worth talking about.
I'm not gonna drop the book, because it does get me thinking about stuff and that's what I read books for. I guess it reminds me of University days, of how irritated I get when we are assigned a problematic reading to pick apart and present to class. I hope I'm not picking this apart too much 😭 I'm not sure if I'm enraged and reading too much into it. I might be totally wrong. idk... I think I need to join an anthropology book club to have people to talk with about this. Only way for now is to share on the internet and maybe a discussion starts. Want to see what others think of this (especially if they read the book).
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hiii!!! so uh, this is sorta about 'contradicting' (?) identities in general, but i only recently found out about, like, lesboys and gaygirls and all of that, but what is it exactly? like how does it work? or is that weird to ask? i'm trying figuring myself out but a lot of stuff i've seen doesn't exactly... explain it (or explain it well), and while i guess i do get why, it's just kinda hard to understand it myself for my own identity
also, probably a question you get a lot in a hating way, but isn't the definition of lesbian nonman loving nonman? so then how does lesboy work? like is it for people with more complicated gender identites, like fluctuating genders and bigender? just genuinly confused, my apologies...
sorry for not getting to this sooner- been busier lately and didn't have the time to collect everything I needed to respond!
About what it exactly means to be a lesboy or a gaygirl ('turigirl' is the more common term, 'turi' meaning turian, another word for gay attraction to men. so I'll be referring to it as that from now on), there isn't exactly....one right way to call yourself such. it really depends on the person, but I can give you a basic definition and a list of common reasons someone may call themselves such
im gonna put a read more because this ended up being super long so sorry
lesboy is a term for any lesbian who may have a connection to manhood and/or masculinity. turigirl is just the opposite of that, a gay person (mlm/nblm) who may have a connection to womanhood and/or femininity. common reasons I've seen are:
being multigender or genderfluid
being cusper/in between trans and cis gnc (in between trans man and cis gnc woman, in between trans woman and cis gnc man)
being a system who uses lesboy/turigirl as a collective identity or when identities blur together
a person who uses man/boy or woman/girl as a means of masculine or feminine gender expression but not actually identifying as such
being a trans man/ftm or a trans woman/mtf who still identifies as lesbian or gay for personal reasons
those are far from all the reasons, everyone has their own unique experiences, but the gist is these people may have some sort of connection to manhood/womanhood while still having a queer attraction. personally, I'm multigender, genderfluid, and transmasc. lesboy I find is a nice label to express being both my bigender self and being a lesbian, as it forces people to acknowledge both without separating the two. it's cute and makes me feel validated!
as for "nonman attracted to nonmen" definition of lesbian......it has its issues. it's received criticism all around from all sorts of lesbians in the community. this definition is very new - it emerged only in the recent years, and someone on twitter had date searched it and found it didn't even really exist before 2019. and having that as the one and only official definition that every lesbian has to abide by, when lesbian is a centuries old word with so much history behind it, is a bit ignorant. people who are multiple genders or ftm or bi being lesbian is not even remotely new, going back decades upon decades, and it never stopped existing too. It's a bit weird to have a whole new definition that doesn't include all sorts of lesbians that have been here for so long and just tell them they're not welcomed anymore, right?
that's not even close to the only issue there is with it. it's been disliked for centering lack of attraction to men, or defining lesbian in relation to men, rather than who we're actually attracted to. putting nonbinary people in a new binary of either being "men or nonmen," which not all feel comfortable putting themselves into. especially when considering a definition of gay being "nonwomen attracted to nonwomen," man-woman bigender people are simultaneously excluded from being both lesbian or gay. It inherently overlaps with mspec identity ("attraction to nonmen, which is more than one gender" and "any orientation that involves attraction to more than one gender" kinda obviously overlap), despite people insisting that a lesbian can never be mspec. people have found multiple loopholes in it, (which I can elaborate on if someone wants me to, for the sake of trying to make this as short as possible), and lastly, and term "nonman" (and nonwoman) were found to have existed before to describe the degendering of black people in society. this isn't the only source I've seen for this, but sadly I can't exactly find it (or find it without going back to that hellsite called twitter and I'm not doing that to myself)
oh and as the link points out, defining lesbian by these words also ends up excluding a lot of two-spirit people from ever identifying as lesbian, myself included. which is also really racist. I don't know how you're gonna end up excluding a whole cultural gender that's common for indigenous americans to describe themselves with and try to prove it somehow isn't racist, to be honest
and lastly, some surveys/polls have shown that the definition isn't the most widely accepted by lesbians as people make it out to be. there's this simple poll that someone posted asking how lesbians felt about the definition that received 1,529 responses, and 61.1% of voters said they disliked it. comments gave lots of reasons I've stated already. there was another survey put out that received 211 responses that for any lesbian who had a genderqueer or unique relationship with gender, and one of the questions asking opinions on the "nonmen loving nonmen" as a definition. the average among the group was slightly negative (average 2.838), and reported that the group who tended to feel the most positively about it didn't consider themselves to be trans, with the other positive leaning group considered themselves to be somewhat cis. the group that felt the most negatively sometimes considered themselves to be trans. and of the multigender participants, the average opinion was 2.255 (more negative than the overall average). When concluding, the original poster stated, "When divided by gender, the only groups to feel positive about this definition were "not trans" and "somewhat cis" participants. Multigender participants felt especially negative about this definition"
all of this shows that this definition isn't nearly the best for everyone who considers themselves a lesbian. I know it's been a way to include nonbinary people who are lesbian in it's definition, but I think it really misunderstands why nonbinary people are included in lesbianism in the first place, and just assumes that all nonbinary people aren't men and fails to recognize that multigender/genderfluid people are nonbinary too. and it's not like lesbian has to only have on definition- it can definitely have multiple and depend on each person's experience with it. if someone personally defines them being lesbian around being a nonman attracted to nonmen, and takes pride in not being attracted to men, that's totally fine. what becomes a problem is forcing all lesbians to define themselves like this and make it the standard, or else they're "not real lesbians." it is ahistorical and ignorant to require this or else you'll strip them of their lesbian status, and is really at the end of the day, lesbophobic. especially as a requirement that primarily exists in online spaces. im sure the lesbian who is not at all connected to these circles doesn't particularly care about strict requirements or whether someone is a "nonman" or not. in conclusion, it is not the best nor most accepted definition of lesbian, and deciding which lesbians are valid or not based solely on that definition is pretty exclusionary and ends up policing a lot of lesbians, myself included
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mikobeautifulheart · 11 hours
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Hey I liked that fic you did on pervy megumi ❤ could you do it with yuji but make it a little sweeter ❤❤ty
Ahh I'm sorry this took so long because for the first time in history this is slightly more edited. I tried sweeter but honestly at this point I think i'm incapable of affection. I tried *sigh* sorry bout that.
Pervy Yuji (thoughts)
TW: pervert. Obsessed (Mildly) Some weird non consented touches but not smut. (or spicy sorry guys.)
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No surprise that Yuji just can't get enough of you.
Every moment, ever opportunity, he takes it.
Y/N wanna train together? Y/N wanna study together?
Y/N Gojo sensei is making us pick partners for the sister school even, wanna be mine?
Its not just being together but also distance.
The fact that every training session ends a little too close together.
"Yuji your squishing me." You muffled trapped under Yuji's body...again.
"Ah sorry Y/N! I lost my footing there and couldn't keep my balance."
Out of training to.
"Sorry Y/n the train is getting a little crowded" he said trying to hide his face in his collar.
"Its not your fault Yuji"
Every bump of the train you felt his hand on places you usually would hit someone's hand away from... Good thing he looked so innocent or you wouldn't have brushed it off so easily.
But every time you brushed it off. Yuji is just trying his best you know? He's Sukuna's vessel and never even knew about curses until now, you had to cut him some slack.
Even if it had nothing to do with the Jujutsu world.
"Hey Yuji, did you happen to get my laundry by accident? I can't find it anywhere and Megumi said you were there last."
"Oh uh I can check but if it's not here do you need help looking?"
"Uh- thanks but no, its just some...it would be embarrassing I guess. You know what never mind I probably just misplaced it again sorry." You sigh and walk out the room.
It happens more often then you liked. Some clothes of yours would go missing and then you would find them where you last left them or in a basket near the laundry.
If only you checked his lower dresser draw filed with some of you clothes.
When they lose their scent they get put back and so the cycle continues.
"Your sick. And that's coming from me. The king of curses, I kill and eat people and i'm telling you your sick ha." Sukuna chuckled in his head.
"Shut up. Like you would understand." Yuji said climbing down from a tree across from your window.
THANK YOU FOR READING ♡
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AUTHOURS NOTE: Omg I wrote this so long ago but it didn't save. But it's okay because I re-wrote it and it's way better now. Trust me (even tho the ending sucks a bit). Anyways have a good whatever time of day.
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peter
"Preserved from when we were just kids" "The goddess of timing Once found us beguiling"
The first part, they were 18 and 22 when they first got together and during the beginning of their relationship and "beguiling" means enchanting/charming - and the World was enchanted by them when they were together (aside from the haters) and then even while they were off and on over the years, he was always the one that she said would come in and out of her life and they'd "never be over", all which still fits with that beguiling line.
"I thought it was just goodbye for now"
"You said you were gonna grow up Then you were gonna come find me"
This is NOT giving me Matty vibes at all and I'll die on that hill. Again, 18 and 22 fits here more than 24 and 25. Sure, you're still growing at 24/25 don't get me wrong but, Matty was very much not saying "I'm going to grow up and come find you one day" at 25 years old in the height of his addiction and during his "I can't be with someone bigger than me because I want success on my own". This is giving "I was 18 when we got together and I need to figure my shit out but, one day we'll be together when I do". This also fits her saying he was always in and out of her life. She's been waiting for him to grow up and come find her again.
"But life was always easier on you Than it was on me"
She got way more hate during their relationship than he did, as she mentions in Slut! On top of the fact, he dated/had flings with many women back to back and never got shit for it but, she dates men back to back and gets hated for it. Granted, that could fit just about any male if we're honest but, she specifically wrote Slut! about Harry so.
"When crossing your jet stream We both did the best we could do Underneath the same moon In different galaxies"
This is giving me very much "we were constantly traveling for work and maybe my jet would cross over yours and we'd end up in the same place and try to make it work and then again when we were so far away from each other". It's also interesting that this album has quite a bit of talk about galaxies/aliens/moons and then circus/con men etc. when the last two MVS we got from Harry were "Satellite" and "Daylight" - Satellite which has the imagery of the sky/galaxy and saying he's waiting for her and then we have "Daylight" which is a circus theme MV.
"And I won't confess that I waited, but I let the lamp burn As the men masqueraded, I hoped you'd return With your feet on the ground, tell me all that you'd learned"
Here she's saying she dated other men during their time apart but, she was always still waiting for him to return to her and tell her he's grown up, figured out what he wanted, and that it's her.I also get the vibe she mentions men specifically because she was talking about him still being a "boy", so she dated men waiting for him - Calvin/Tom because they were her age range and they were "masquerading" as her boyfriend.
"And you said you'd come and get me, but you were twenty-five And the shelf life of those fantasies has expired"
This specific line is what has everyone thinking Matty but, they MET when he was 25. He was not laying all these promises out to her then and that's not what this line is saying to me. It's saying that the muse made all these promises to her BEFORE he turned 25 and then they saw each other again when he was 25 - he told her "I made those as a kid, they've expired now that we're older, they were just fantasies". Harry was 25 when he released Fine Line and when they saw each other at Ed's wedding. My guess is that was the first time they'd seen each other in a while and there was a talk that night and he might've said something along those lines or she took it that way.
All of this to also say the obvious ties of "Peter" and this song bringing the Peter Pan imagery and then "Peter Losing Wendy" reference in "Cardigan" which is obviously about Harry Styles. The fact people want to connect that with Matty now because they think this song is Matty is wild. Matty was not that young when they met, 25 is still a grown ass adult. Technically Harry was 17 when he met Taylor and who knows if they actually dated before he turned 18 or not. But James in Cardigan acts like a 17/18 year old Harry probably would've acted vs a 25 year old man. And even IF Matty and Taylor had a thing back then, it was an incredibly quick fling. Sleeping together and maybe a few dates but, they were definitely never in a relationship. She did not write Cardigan about a short fling.
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tardis--dreams · 1 day
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Some of those doctors make hating oat milk their entire personality. I hate them. Cannot pretend to find them funny or like i give a shit. Fucking pretentious assholes
#also my colleague (the girl i had my shift with) is the exact opposite of me in all aspects. asked me if I'd ever worked in customer service#because i couldn't care less about being fake friendly to assholes and don't care if they like the service or not#like bitch those people don't have any other choice but drink our fucking coffee it's not like I'm competing with anyone#or like they pay us in any way. i get paid for doing the dumb work i have to do not for stroking some dumb ass doctors' egos#they come out of their rooms once an hour to get coffee and we have the cups on the table and i wouldn't even Think of#HANDING them the cups and smiling sweetly at them and asking 'coffee? tea?? :))'#I'll just assume these grown adults will get their stupid coffee or tea when they want some. it's not like they don't know where it is#(and i AM friendly and smile when someone is coming in our direction but why the fuck do you need to get so disgustingly friendly with them#if someone held up a cup asking if i.want some coffee I'd leave immediately even if i came just for coffee. it's creepy)#anyway. she's nice. I'm not.#there's normal people who will get their coffee and maybe ask if the milk in the little jug is cow milk to which I'll happily reply 'yes#:)'. then there's the other people who see the oat milk and make it clear they are the most insufferable people on the planet#(and i pity their patients so much. not much to choose from i guess but if i had that as a doctor I'd happily just die)#like everyone who took oatmilk could do it without making a fuss about the cow milk on the table. the cow milk lovers could never#'the oat milk is in front of the actual milk. this is unacceptable. i hate such healthy bullshit' lol okay#'OAT milk?? I'll leave this to the horses! THANK GOD you have actual milk!'#my favorite was the one who really took personal offense with its sheer presence. as if it had killed half of his patients lmao#'we had 50 patients with xyz problem. ALL of them drink oat milk. they cannot see the connection. it's really unhealthy'#at this point i just said i didn't care and stopped paying attention and he started complaining to his doctor colleague about how#oat milk is advertised to be healthy and how it's actually the opposite and i just find that very funny compared to the first comment#from that one guy who doesn't like such healthy bullshit. you guys need to find a consensus on the oatmilk issue i think. no one takes you#seriously if you contradict yourself like this. also i couldn't care less about the healthiness of the milk alternative of my choice. bitch.#next week I'll end up killing someone. i hope they all die from their cow milk. (but not the ones who took cow milk and didn't say anything#about the oat milk. they can continue living as they didn't annoy me)#void screams#some of these doctors were actually quite nice (most of them even). one even brought an applicant to us telling her to get some coffee#(which we are not allowed to give to applicants. but i don't care. I'd rather they get something than some of the asshole jury members#who hate oat milk (which is not the issue. the issue is them making it everybody else's issue that they don't like oat milk))
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the-casbah-way · 2 months
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very impossible to find the balance between "i want my friends to be able to talk to me about their problems and tell me when they're struggling" and "i am extremely emotionally fragile at the moment because i'm doing very badly and talking about very heavy topics especially with no warning is not something i feel capable of dealing with right now because i'm on the verge of a violent mental breakdown"
#i guess i need to find a way of telling people that i'm in that headspace in the first place#because i probably seem completely fine#but i can't tell people those things unless they explicitly invite me to do so first#so i'm assuming everyone just looks at me and goes yeah you seem fine so i can unload all this heavy stuff on you and you'll be able to cop#but unfortunately. i cannot and i feel guilty about it#but i already have way more bad days than good and when i have to hear people talking about like#very intense personal trauma and suicide and shit#it throws me off for the rest of the day and i go nonverbal until i can go straight home and sob until i fall asleep#and that is not an exaggeration it keeps happening to me with multiple different people#i don't want anyone to feel like they have to pretend around me in any way#but i also don't know how to cope with hearing intense things like this when i'm on a knife's edge mentally all the time#and i cannot afford to keep cutting my days so much shorter when i should be working#and also like when people DO talk to me about these things it's like#it's good they can get it off their chest#but now i'm holding onto all of the stuff they've just told me as well as the stuff i was already secretly holding onto about my own life#and now i have to go home alone with nowhere to put any of it because i don't have anyone to talk to#i've had people tell me this is therapeutic to talk about this stuff#but it's not for me because i'm not talking i'm just listening and then being overwhelmed and triggered and upset about it all#and most of it probably boils down to the fact that i cannot express my own feelings or tell people my boundaries#in situations this sensitive because it's so like. precarious and awkward#but i'm like i can't deal with it all the time it's too much
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starpros-sunshine · 8 months
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If I loved Wataei less I might be able to talk about them more....
#You know what I also like. Jane Austens Pride and Prejudice (knows that's a quote from Emma)#Gosh I really need to read Emma#Been meaning to but I've just been chipping away at mansfield park because it is so long#and personally I find it rather tedious to read because...Well let's just say I'm not very partial to people marrying their cousins#I am aware it was not strange in ye olden days but it's one of those modern biases I can't really shake off#but I can live with it it's just something that makes me do a little displeased frown because honestly#that's the best match the poor girl could've gotten in that book there were no better options at least the guy wasn't a complete moron#as far as I can gage at least#but I guess that's my fault for starting with Pride and Prejudice I found my Austen otp in Elizabeth and Darcy I just think they're really#really neat#I originally got into Jane Austen because I have a classmate or well I guess friend would be a fitting term too although we don't really#talk outside of a school setting or outside of the group but I don't really talk to anyone outside of the group or school anyways so#might as well just call her a friend#but yes she is very into Jane Austen she's such an anglophile in the best way possible it's very endearing she can tell you a lot about tea#and such#but back to topic I got into the books because she liked them and we share an english class where we're the only ones from our little bubbl#so naturally that sparks conversation and what to talk about when two people who are into english novels if not english novels#I got her to read Sherlock Holmes and she still like Agatha Christie better#but I was very happy about that because I really like Sherlock Holmes#she's much more patient than some of my other friends if that's the right word so that makes talking easier#it's not fun when you can tell your conversation partner doesn't really care#so now I'm still trying to get through all the Auste novels I'm doing a terribly poor job at it#been at it since January how many have I managed to finish? two.#I'm listening to the audiobooks and listening to engllish can be very tiring and the lady that narrates has a very nice voice so sometimes#I fall asleep and lose the point where I was so then I have to start the entire chapter again and it's a whole thing really#but where were we ah yes Wataei#I love them I really do it's such a shame I wish I could articulate it and put it into words#but instead I have this feelings soup#oh for shame what a horrible horrible world to live in#I missed rambling in my tags I think if I'm too scared to post something I'll just put it aaaaaalll in my tags again
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kakusu-shipping · 1 year
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Thank you for the nice tags on the pic published to catchonehand!
Zen as the middle child? I'm curious and would love to know what you're referring to 👀
I got this ask like two days ago I'm so sorry I caught a cold and didn't get to answer fdjgfkdgjkdf
This is the post in question btw for anyone confused because again I reblogged that like two days ago
The fastest answer is I've been seeing a lot of Ramattra as a Protective Older Brother to Zenyatta art, and have always seen Zenyatta Genji in the same Brotherly Found Family kind of relationship (vaguely all my relationships are grey and moldable by recent art I've seen)
So if this Found Family Tree goes Ramattra-Zenyatta-Genji, that makes Zenyatta a Middle Child which I feel is fitting.
The funnier half of it though is that sense Ramattra was made for the Omnic Crisis, and no Omnics were made after the Crisis, this means Zen (at 20) HAS to be older than Ramattra, physically. Meanwhile Genji is 35 if I remember right (the official character page doesn't show their ages anymore so this may be subject to change in OW2)
Meaning by AGE it'd go Genji-Zenyatta-Ramattra, keeping Zen the Middle Child once again.
Out of all the lore we could have possibly gotten for Zenyatta, after 6 years, they choose to make him a Middle Child. Short Middle Sibling Energy.
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leatherbookmark · 2 years
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sitting and thinking (in the context of my fic but also in general) about the things about jgy that lxc doesn’t know, but specifically those that wwx KNOWS but won’t tell him. because that would make him soft, and we don’t want that
#like this is so infuriating#in the novel... there literally is no last scar on wwx's forearm. there's no Imperative forcing him to solve the mystery Lest He Dies#and yet. and yet. the way lxc's reluctance to hop on the detective xianlock weimes train is almost framed as this... irritating obtuseness#and like i KNOW jgy did those things that lxc didn't want to believe he did. but wwx's approach is so impersonal sometimes#it Is just a mystery and uncovering it is fun for him. and i guess in a mystery novel it's also exciting for the detective to find all the#clues and exclaim that it was the butler that did it! but ignoring the circumstances that led the butler to do it to em is just Mean Okay#especially since we're holding in our hands a How Wei Wuxian Did It To Em: The Novel#that's the way it starts: wei wuxian the murderous yiling laozu! thank god he's dead! and then we find out that he wasn't an one-dimensional#villain! but while wwx can sort of say SAME HAT about the way jgy becomes the scapegoat in the span of like one day... as many people#before me said they have exactly zero feelings about each other. Nothing. and it's not a bad thing! it's interesting and ironic and makes#you lie down and go AAAAAA WHAT IF...!!!#but going back to lxc. he seems to know that jgy killed his father and that qin su was his sister but he wasn't at the lotus pier when the#cultivators talked about it and theorized about What Else he Definitely Did#wwx didn't tell him a thing about the brothel or meng shi's body. and i'm just very horizontal about it. i need to lie the fuck down#i still after 84 years have Not read the extras but like. is lxc sitting out there? wasting away? Uninformed? PROBABLY HE IS YEAH#because it's not like wwx cares particularly and at this point i think lwj would mentally spit if not piss on jgy's grave for hurting lxc#so they have zero business telling him stuff that might frame jgy in another more nuanced light. but also even if they did. then what?#hey this guy you were tricked into killing because you thought he didn't do murders but he did and it flipped your view of him upside down#so much that you believed that he genuinely would attack you? yeah about that we think he might have just wanted to get his mother's body#back. yeah from this temple where he essentially deified her. the temple he built where the brothel was. yeah they were treated horribly#out there and like i guess jgy wanted to make sure his mom would never have to suffer like that again or something. anyway thats all yea bye#i'm sad.#shut up shrimp
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batboybisexualism · 1 year
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I may be stupid (I'm definitely stupid) but if you're a doctor's office and you're sending a patient to get labs please remind them a day or so before the appointment that it's supposed to happen at a separate location, especially if you're making them go in for labs on a day when your office is closed and they can't get in touch with you to ask where they're supposed to go. also please tell them whether or not they need to fast for the blood tests, for the love of fucking god
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ghost-orion · 1 year
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#personal#i still have like a deep seated hatred for people who like girls and i have no idea why#i've been like this since 15 what's going on. like i can't get to the bottom of it?? where did this come from??#it's bisexuals it's lesbians; straight guys are like. idk not really 'off the hook' but i guess they're like 'well whatever'#cishet guys are like 'well what would i do with you anyway' and i relate to trans straight guys on the basis of being trans#but i just. idk. i just seethe#it goes away when i hang out with -lw people but when i'm alone and i see someone be like 'yeah haha i've been talking to a girl'#or someone 'simping' in the comments of a girl's selfie or whatever i'm like '!!¡!'#and like this has a root somewhere but i can't really find it? i think the closest is like jealousy ig. but idk??#it's not like i want lesbians to be attracted to me lol or that i need everyone to drop everything Look At Me >:[#disclaimer: this is something that i'm working on and i don't tell anyone i'm just putting it here to say it somewhere#it might be like a gender thing. i'm like kinda genderfluid in some way and#and i'm a trans person who considers itself to 'have been a girl and now live as not-that'#so maybe it's like. 'i've been called a pretty girl and now i've abandoned this for an uphill battle of chasing gay guys who fucking hate#trans people'#and by that i mean gay guys around here are just. woof#i am in fact not into transphobes dkdkksks#it's just. idk#if you're reading this and you like women i don't hate you btw jdnjs this is a me problem and you're fine lol i realize how fucked up it is
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ant-diary · 2 years
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There’s this dude that I think is flirting with me? Which admittedly isn’t something I ever pick up on but I feel like people have pointed out to me what things are flirting so I’m thinking maybe its the case here but I don’t really have a gut instinct for it.
That said, I don’t really know what to do? Honestly part of me isn’t even sure I want to be too much of friends with him
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