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pallas-cat · 4 months

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not to over dramatize my depression but like since im a child I kinda just

lost a drive for myself per se and am really just drifting through life incapable of much more than maintaining myself alive and even then it it's a challenge

#i am sleep and sun deprived so I feel it rn but like #even on good days i feel so hollow and like my existence as a wholly alive human being is just #maintained so others dont get hurt with grief #idk #i just want out man

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booksandpaperss · 24 days

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ASK GAME YIPPEEE

sleet sun and fog pls for me

weather WIP ask game

hi nyxi! at your service ✨

🌨 Sleet - What's the most you've ever written in one sitting?

okay so the most I have ever written in one sitting ever has been about 3k words I believe? it was when I was 14 and it was the first fanfic I'd ever written, idk what fumes I was high off of but I wrote 3,000 words in 2 hours without stopping like it was nothing. I've never been able to do that since, the closest I've come to it is when I wrote almost 2k words in one sitting in a sleep deprived delirium a few weeks ago. my writing has improved a lottt since age 14 for sure but I do wish I had what 14 yr old me had that night </3

I will say tho that I've gotten a lot better this year at writing more words at a time, it used to be a struggle to crank out any more than 200 words and now my bare minimum word count I can expect when I sit down to write is 400-500, and lately its been more so, progress! lol

also shoutout to authors who write like 4k+ in one sitting y'all scare me

☀️ Sun - What's your favorite part of your WIP?

I have many WIPs so I will go with my ultimate WIP aka my sapphic fantasy novel and hmm. I'd say my fave part is a tie between when Tessa and Sophia first really connect and Tessa realizes Sophia is the first person to see her as someone strong and brave and make her feel like she's worthy of being a person in her own right and... the scene where Tessa gets her shit rocked by [redacted] after Sophia tried to protect her by separating them and she loses it and hunts down and kills this guy she really hates lol

🌫 Fog - What was the hardest part of your WIP to write?

Ummm like. every other paragraph LMAO. there are parts that flow really easily and then other parts where I'm just like ummm what are words again. what am I even doing hello what is this? but the nice thing abt first drafts if that if I get really stuck I can always just throw in a one sentence descriptor of what I to want to happen in brackets and then move on to the next scene that flows. im sure future me will be very annoyed when they have to deal with those later but at the pace im going that is soooo far from my problem rn :D

thx for the ask bestie!

#ask game #booksandpaperss asks #elli's writing

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little-cereal-draws · 1 year

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I’ve seen a lot of posts abt how wonderful it is when Neurodivergent ppl live together bc they finally understand each other and don’t have to deal w neurotypical living expectations. Well here’s an angry three am rant abt my experience as an autistic living w an autistic roommate. (This is just my personal experience that I need to get out)

—

He stims vocally a lot and it really bothers me. I can’t focus on my work, especially writing, but I don’t want to stop him bc I know how important it is

He plays video games until 3am most nights (including rn) and I’m so sleep deprived that I want to cry all the time and almost fall asleep as soon as I sit down but I don’t want to tell him to stop bc I know those are his special interests. I know first hand how soul crushing it is to be told u can’t engage w ur special interests so I let him do it

He’ll have the tv, his laptop, and phone all playing different things at the same time and forget doing my work, I can’t even be in the same room. It’s too much. But I don’t want to tell him to stop bc that’s stimulus he’s needs Ig

I know a lot of ppl have trouble w temperature regulation and he’s got a space heater that’s on 24/7, even when he’s not home. I live in the south and it’s summer now so it’s around 80-90 degrees every day but I’ll come home and it’s even hotter in our room. Walking in feels like getting slapped in the face w the sun. I think it baked my plant alive bc even tho I got one that could survive heat, it’s crispy and white like a ghost. I didn’t even know plants could do that. But he also always wears a hoodie and jeans no matter how hot it is so maybe he’s cold all the time. Idk

He’s got no spatial awareness. He likes to do his projects on the floor and completely spreads out so I can’t access my bed, night table, food, or supplies. His stuff already takes up 2/3 of the room anyway but this makes me dance and tiptoe around his projects for days on end

Adding onto that last point, he doesn’t remember things very well. And I know that’s not his fault but it’s so annoying to come home and he’s done his share of the chores but didn’t put the cleaning supplies away. Or he’s ironed his clothes but left the ironing board out in the middle of the room. He finally washed his dishes today that had been overflowing from the sink for eight months. And I know executive disfunction can be a bitch but I’m so tired of not even being able to wash a single fork bc there’s no more space in the sink

And the lights,,,, I know a lot of ppl have sensory issues w overhead lights but it’s so frustrating when I’m obviously working on a project, putting fine details on a still life or whatever, and he just turns the light off. I can’t work in the dark but I know what a pain lights can be so I just let him do it

And he’s a good guy and is nice and all that but I can not wait to move out. And I’m not blaming him for any of this, it’s 100% on me and I know it. I haven’t expressed my displeasure for these things or asked him to change so I shouldn’t expect him to magically know what I’m thinking. I’m too much of an anxious ppl pleaser to assert any boundaries

#i wrote this at 3am bc he’s playing video games #i might delete this later #i just needed to get it out of my system #I’m an asshole I know #i need to communicate better

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straighttxhell · 6 months

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Get to know me! 💋

So,, @the-type-a tagged me in this like 8 months ago and never got a chance to do it cause tumblr kept deleting the draft but I am procrastinating doing my final project to graduate college so here goes nothing

Thanks for the tag and feel free to do it again cause lmao it's been a whike

�� - Do you have/want any tattoos?

No I wanna get a spider gwen tattoo but I dont have a ton of money rn

💚 - What’s your favourite colour?

Pastel pink 🩷

🍕 - What’s the last thing you ate?

Spinach Pasta

🕰 - What time is it where you are rn?

11:27 pm (when i started, its 11:50 now)

🌟 - What is your zodiac sign?

Sagittarius sun, Taurus moon, and Aquarius rising.

I also have Venus and Mars in Scorpio so that pretty much sums up why I'm insane.

🌍 - What is your favourite accent?

I really enjoy cockney accents, Daniel Kaluuya's in particular. Maybe it's just his voice.

⚡️ - Do you have any scars?

Yes, I accidentally stabbed my thigh, also accidentally cut it with a blade, and my legs are covered in permanent bruises from when I danced.

🌺 - What’s your MBTI type?

Every time I do it I get smth different, so either INTP or ISFP??

🥀 - Favourite animated movie?

SPIDER-VERSE!!!!!! MY ENTIRE LIFE

I CHOSE MY CAREER BC OF IT

📺 - Favourite show?

The Office probably, or Community, I really like sitcoms

😂 - Are you ticklish?

Isn't everyone??

💍 - Do you ever want to get married?

Yes, I am one of those ppl that want to meet like their one true love and get married and spend our entire lives together

😳 - Do you like your name?

It triggers me a little so I don't like to be called by it but I like the name by itself a lot

💙 - What colour is your bedroom?

Like a beige green, I hate it but it came like that and am too lazy to paint it

🤓 - How did you get your name?

My mom liked it thats it lol

🎓 - When did/do you graduate?

This month hopefully, my ceremony isn't until January tho

🍄 - Do you have/want any piercings?

Yeah I have the normal ones, two in my left ear and one in my right ear so I can freely forget to wear earrings Id add a pick but I dont want to

👀 - What colour are your eyes?

Veeeery dark brown

👱🏻‍♀️ - What is your go to hairstyle?

A messy bun, I like having it down although it's mostly hot here so that's not possible, and sometimes I do have to put it in a bun cause my hair is really really thin and straight so it tangles incredibly easy and it takes me a good 5 minutes to brush it and I tend to be in such a hurry every morning I simply can't afford to do that

🥂 - Have you ever drank underage?

Yes I didn't know tho lol I was 14 and drinking funny tasting grape juice at sleepovers, my friends thought I knew lol uhmm but yeah after that I stopped until I was 18 and back from quarantine

🍾 - Have you ever gotten drunk?

Don't take me as a role model please, but yes and I love getting drunk, I've never blacked out but I do remember every now and then funny memories like huh I forgot I did that 🥰 Also I've only once drank so much I puked it all up next morning

😱 - What’s your biggest fear?

Roaches?? Not trying to get too deep

🥵 - Would you rather be too hot or too cold?

Hot. I hate not being able to move bc of cold, my body aches so bad when its cold.

🌦 - What’s your favourite weather?

Cloudy, rainy and not cold, like eventually the sun comes out yknow

🍂 - What’s your favourite season?

Fall

🐷 - What’s your favourite animal?

Catssss

🐶 - Do you have any pets?

2 cats!! And my sister has 2 dogs but they're also kinda mine ig

😴 - What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep?

No idea, I am way too sleep deprived to notice at the end

🎨 - Any hobbies?

Drawing, painting, video editing and designing, anything creative

🛩 - If travelling was free, where’s the first place you’d go?

New York 😭😭😭 if i had a visa also Id love to stay at the plaza hotel

🎇 - What’s your most searched thing on Google?

Probably Taylor Swift?? or the Spice Chalk Stretch Naked Wokfe boots

📱 - Favourite app on your phone?

PINTEREST, a girl without pinterest is an angel without wings..

🤠 - Are you more of a city person or a country person?

City by far, I've spent all my life in the city and wouldn't stand not having everything I have here

Tagging: @spnyuri @queer-cosette and idk who is still active here but whoever wants to do it

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lesbeanbag01 · 2 years

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Thanks for tagging me @chikooritajjk ☺️

Name: My name is Céline but my friend calls me a variety of other names such as George, Da Vinci, babe, bestie, etc.

Sign: I am a Capricorn, more specifically I’m a Capricorn sun Taurus moon. I relate to this. But honestly otherwise I don’t know much about astrology, however, being friends with a lot of other queer women I hear about it lol.

Time: It’s 10:45am here. But by the time I post this that won’t be accurate anymore ;) So let’s just say early lunch.

Birthday: I’m born on Jan 6th 2001 in Hong Kong.

Height: I’m a whole 165cm tall. Funny story, I’ve been saying that I’m 167cm but when I measured myself with a robot at the pharmacy recently I was apparently 165cm. However, unless my posture has worsened (impossible😨) and I’ve shrunk 2cm I still think I’m 167cm because that’s what the doctors said.

Favorite band/artist: My favorite band/artist is BTS. However, I also like other artists a few of which are Queen, Fleetwood Mac, Blondie, Kate Bush (she blew up again thanks to ST it’s crazy), Frank Ocean, DKZ, King Princess, and Kehlani.

Last movie: To be honest I don’t watch that many movies anymore, I used to love them but rn I prefer shows. So I really had to think about this one but I think the last movie I watched is Crush.

Last show: The last shows I watched was Extraordinary Attorney Woo and Chernobyl.

Instruments: I can’t play any instruments very well atm, but when I was younger I took piano lessons. But let me tell you that after that I was traumatised because Chinese piano teachers are.. interesting people. ”Céline why you no practice?!” and ”Lazy”. I’m teaching myself to play guitar sometimes tho. Otherwise the only sport I do is boxing.

When you created this blog: I can’t even remember, it was years ago.

What you post: BTS and jikook. Occasionally something else as well.

Other blogs: I used to have a blog when I was about 10 years old that was dedicated to posting about my dumb thoughts. The reason I started that blog was because my friend did one about books she read and sims.

Followers: Don’t know don’t care lol.

Average hours of sleep: 8 hours. I need the sleep to be able to focus on my uni lectures. I used to be a bit sleep deprived and it made me feel sick/nauseous.

What I’m wearing: Don’t want to tell.

Dream job: Songwriter, authour. I’m probably going to work with psychology tho since that’s what I’m studying, although I’m optimistic and think I might be able to do the other two as well.

Dream trip: First of all I’d like to travel to SK. My dad (bleh🤮) used to travel there a lot for work and my mom would sometimes accompany him so she’s told me a bit about it but I would like to go for myself. Second I’d like to go back to Hainan. I remember going when I was little and I really liked it but I’d like to go back. Then I’d also like to go to Italy, Iceland, and Tokyo.

Favorite song: I really cannot answer that. So I’ll change the question to what am I listening to rn.

Stay gay y’all. I don’t know who to tag… I feel embarrassed, you have to understand my social anxiety here. 💫@sweetjikook💫

#Spotify

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yuki-shift · 3 months

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- Spoilers for book 5

- mentions of characters: rook (mildly), vil, epel and neige

- maybe mischaracterization ???

- the things in purple are things I copy and pasted from google

Okay, I’m in book 5 and I have meet vil. I’m on a fight that happened while looking at places with riddle and Trey, before the S&D(?). And I think I have a pretty good understanding of vil. I even came up with a nickname for him that I thought of while talking with rook (I don’t remember when) but basically if I remember correctly rook was talking something poetic, that’s all I got from him talking cause I was sleep deprived, but then I made my realization that vil is like a flower, and I have good meanings behind it but also about his character, or so I think-

Remember that vil haven’t over bolted for me yet so I haven’t seen his issues and such. But I see vil as a flower, first of all because flowers need the sun (vils fans essentially) to ravish and not wither away, while if flowers don’t have the sun then they would wither away and have no light. In this case vil is the flower and his fans and the people who shower him in compliments are the sun, I’m not saying he’d wither away and become less beautiful, but like, if the suns glow doesn’t glow enough, the flower will start to kinda uhhh, go down?? Something like that. And so in this case the suns (his fans) attention stray from him and instead his rival, he’ll feel saddened?? Something like that.

Another thing I like is that vil is a flower and neige is snow (cause I believe he’s based off of Snow White) and so, when it snows, the snow covers the flowers beauty, the snow shimmering in the winter and warm sunny winter days, but when the snow melts onto the flower the snow becomes water and fuels or like bounces back and tries again?? Idk, it’s hard to explain especially since I haven’t slept this day 😭

Vil = flower - neige = snow - fans = sun

Like that if it helps. I have other reasons on why I have these nicknames.

Vil is like a purple flower, maybe like an delphinium, and I got reasons why

(This is all from google)

Purple delphinium flower – as with all purple-coloured flowers, the purple delphinium is a good flower for signify royalty and beauty.

The meaning of delphiniums is generally accepted as 'big hearted'. Like many flowers, different colours of delphiniums often carry their own significance. Blue, the most common colour, signifies dignity and grace while white and pink represent new life and the power of youth

So that’s another reasons why I picked flower for vil, and I also saw on another thing that it meant love and elegant, but it might’ve been a different flower I was reading about

———————————————————————

Another thing about vil is that I understand his points and stuff about beauty and it being able to be a weapon, but I also understand how epel feels with all this stuff and vils points. So in conclusion if they got into a fight and I had to pick a side, id pick neither, if they’re was a debate about it as well I would simply not know who to pick and say “nuh uh” and not choose

———————————————————————

ANYWAY, see you lovely’s another time and if you read all this, thank you, it makes me really happy. And I’m doing this on my iPad rn so if anything looks wonky that’s why 🥹. AND OMG I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT I HAVE OTHER NICKNAMES FOR OTHER TWST CHARACTERS (only like 4 or 5- 💀) but like, I’ll talk about it later. And I’m sleep deprived rn so the explanations are kinda bad and I just wanna post this now soooo, I am 😌 ANYWAY I HOPE YOURE HAVING A LOVELY WEEK AND VALENTINES DAY!!! :D

#twisted wonderland #twst vil #twst rook #twst epel #twst neige #twst character analysis #Twst #flowers #delphinium #twst book 5 #I have no idea what tf I'm doing

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atldreaming · 4 years

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It’s really been a while

Wow. How has it nearly been a year since I have written? It’s not been that I haven’t had anything to write- the opposite in fact.

Where to begin?

I last wrote May 16th and it’s crazy. I was so content that night and dead set on recovering from night shifts and moving on with my week and ended up in the hospital for viral meningitis and spent a week lying on couch with all the blinds down, head spinning, fever breaking.

Those two months of night shift were hard. My poor fiance saw me sick and sleep deprived and never gave up on me.

Did I mention he’s my fiance now?

I’ll back up a bit.

After night shift, I moved onto evening shift on my own, as a new nurse. Evening shift has been hard, but nonetheless better for my health. And yet, I am making another job transition in just one week. What a year in learning to advocate for myself, my license as an RN, and my health. What a year of feeling it to my core when the sick don’t want to be healed. What a year of being cursed at by many and learning how to be firm, never passive. Assertive but not aggressively so.

And sometimes I wonder how God feels. The healer. The redeemer. Yet so much of mankind rejects him. Curses his name. Denies Him, denies their need, denies their sin.

So much of being a nurse leads me to think about how truly loving God is to cover us in forgiveness through it all.

We went to visit my family in September and though I had several very real suspicions, he proposed and we’ve been planning our marriage since. Just 3.5 months left from the time I am writing this. He will be moving into our house soon and I will be moving my stuff in as close to the wedding as possible.

We’ve been waiting completely and wholly in the physical aspect of our relationship and it makes me love him more. It’s not that neither of hasn’t done things we regret during other times in our lives, but from day one we vowed to one another to wait wholly and completely.

This man never ceases to amaze me in the way he lives to love God and others and treats me with the utmost respect and adoration.

Through it all he has never stopped leading us towards Jesus.

Through those long night shifts, from crying on the phone with him cause it was 9 am and I couldn’t sleep and the sun was too damn bright and I had to drive back in for another shift in less than 8 hours and my body felt broken, and him calmly praying with me and asking God for healing and rest.

Through sitting bedside with me in the ER, holding my hand and praying with me as I faced the sickest I have been in my life.

And the more we pray together, the more I realize I need to pray.

Praying together on the phone, through voice messages that I can’t listen to until my shift is over at 3 in the morning. Praying in church, in the car.

And I used to be fearful to pray in front of other people. I can’t believe I ever was.

How amazing it is that I can talk to God together with the man I love. How amazing it is that I can come into His presence with my future husband.

How amazing it is that God has sent me this wonderful, Christ following man.

We’ve prayed for my job hunt and finding our house and God has provided things beyond our wildest dreams and even when His provision hasn’t quite looked like what we so selfishly hope for, He provides us with better or the strength to get through.

God is so good.

We have been doing pre-marital counseling and through discussing our lives through a life map exercise I was reminded at how much the Lord has provided for me. And every struggle He has seen me through. When I couldn’t make ends meet and He made them meet for me. When he provided for me so fully. He is the good shepherd and there is truly nothing else I could need.

So much of the last 6 years are just so awe inspiring to me. God has spoken to me and comforted me and provided for me in the times of the lowest of lows.

I’m excited to see where God will continue to lead.

This man I’m going to marry has also seen the extreme provision of the Lord and also has such an awe and reverence for it. I’m so excited to see where God will lead us together and how God can use our strengths to sharpen one another and lift eachother up.

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paperbagnotes · 2 years

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What do I do? Is it too soon?

Sail to So cal rn??

Back to a storage unit of stuff in sf,

I’m not ready to go back??..

What if I’m not enough

October is so soon

With everyone still asking.. it was harder than rn, more ppl, but ppl weren’t so mentally deprived and deranged of the freedoms of the universe so much as here, more txting there, ppl here way pushier, or isolating, less social?but sunsets that last hours in ak?? I didn’t picture before December.. then again what’s a summer here without a friend some one by the fire, time alone is better than with the wrong person however.. no one spends as much time in the wilderness as you. it’s the only super power that’s here, midnight Sun.. unlike sf’s never sleeping clock .. it’s black out.. still some how stuff Can be happening, ugh I gotta leave in September.. but I love and understand my job, I should have never left.. it’s all in retrospect, thought another relationship with a friend could have ended with having time together, instead of all this criticism, all or nothing mentality, that’s nothing like family? City neediness still happening! from ppl there while I’m here.. more interest needing to be given, layed down from women to women to have ANY interest given back, I’m not perfect, I’d jive with so many bomb women.. but I don’t want to engage with serpents, so if some one is one on the inside. I gotta see how I can only be better and not bother.. I’m not the blocker. May be blunt.. not belligerent, on guard sometimes because there’s so much to say now. But I’m terrible to have trusted a one to not have empathy of how someone else is feeling.. I need to ask more, tell more.. but I try to

I terrified.. who?

I’m having tremors

Still no biker or skater,

Scared..

Would walk or drive anywhere

Still scared

I’m screwed..

My cars battery needed a jump the other night w/the Sun and someone followed me home from walking out somewhere.. oh it does not compare

I bow back at homeless ppl who walk past me..

Mid sf where I’m suppose to be?

I can wait till January and stay till.. oh no.. see why go? I need to get to so cal sadly

Maybe angrily.. why do I have to follow through.. why not Chicago in March or may?

Asheville to visit? ASHEVILLE?! To die one day?

Oh dare I say

Srly should I go to Scotland, leave the country..

Still

have to go clean out my storage unit so just when do I go? It’s October.. ik *face melting*

If I make it to the beach on time,

I might make the sunrise..

But if I’m late this year will there be another, what place am I trying to discover,

I wouldn’t trust it.. wouldn’t know what to do, what it would be like to run into you,

So I’d have to go to, After January? In January?

If I don’t run into you on my birthday by the beach, or October’s warm caring air

I’ll make my migration.

Don’t want to rush it, but I’m getting cooked in this dryer! Summers here are such liers..

6 years in that 7 mile square, without clean air..

And I never went back to that beach, but once or twice in the trees, idk why there were less grassy places, back yards only in the sunset, or dailycity, roof tops crowded and parks covered.. north bay just full of ppl pumping out parties of ppl.

East bay could take it easy.. easy to get to far deep in it.. like Brooklyn barricaded.

I can’t go back to sf idk what neighborhood to go anymore.. flamingo beach? Around isle creek?

Closer

For how long 🤦

Oceanside.. never been.. would need wheels?

I won’t cry.. ca the place of driving.

Driving me crazy 🙈

A setting for other destinations

Visit Chicago/la area again,

(Pls stop having ppl tell you Venice)

Crumbling is me

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tounacasserole · 2 years

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random & kind of stupid half asleep, half assed appreciation post cause i wanna spread the love and for some reason sad thoughts in my head but let's ignore that (ft. my sleep deprivation sap, mutuals, ppl iloook up to, shitty puns and wordplay)

<3

@moonxma ur the moon :o you give me like calm and peaceful moon vibes like a blue moon!! ty for being one of the first who kind of kickstarted my whole commitment to being here and writing content :D

@raysano ray? more like ray of sunshine shdhefj bad pun but i love indirectly interacting with you through games and hope we get to know each other and interact more mwah /p

@appreciatingtokrev appreciatingtokrev? appreciating YOU you beautiful human being :)) i like seeing your little thoughts and whatnot around your blog bc i find them interesting to me in a good way

@mochi-coffee absolute sweetheart ∑(ﾟДﾟ) sweeter than ice cream mochi need i say more? no but seeing you wherever makes my day better for some reason because you give that positive n uplifting vibe. me 🤝 you waka skmps

@kallikrein me 🤝 you 🤝 mochi waka simps jdkfjskf ty for being one of the first to interact and leave messages in the tags of my silly little waka headcanons :]] and ty for being my majn source of waka brainrot too (￣∀￣) we krei-n (pronounced crying) over wakasa. i think that was fhe shittiest pun ive ever made in my entire life i apologize dearly

@simpywhore seeing your incorrect quotes make me snort in laughter a lot whenever i see them >:D we haven't interacted but i'm sure you're simp(l)y sweet ksjjfkfkskf

@offtaskotaku go follow them rn this is a threat /hj seriously so so underrated pls check out their work and send them requests i'm sure they work hard and they're bery nice :) great sense of humour 2 i like seeing u on my dash. makes me go off task for a bit to scroll through your blog and reread your hcs!!

@kakuchew also a contributor to my waka brainrot jshffkf your headcanons about the black dragons boys are so awesome and i love their shenanigans which makes it easier to envision them in my head!! less chewing on my thoughts and more space to appreciate them and you too :3

@sukunasbabymama your blog title is kk's safeplace and it sure as hell lives up to the name!! i get a homely vibe from you n i like seeing you pop up on my dash :D like my mama's homemade food! you've made me appreciate kakucho and mucho with your contrnt :))

@wwintersun holy crap i look up to you a whole ton!! your works are simply put masterpieces. when i read them it makes me feel fuzzy and warm it's like when the sun melts the winter away ;D i have a lot of your stuff saved in my drafts to reread on a bad day

@bajipaws your tokrev x male reader stuff has at least pawmped 5 more years into my lifespan (i'll take my leVe now). ur doing king shit and i can't wait to see more stuff from you!!!

@kageyahoe your latest work with baji made me Feel all the emotions /pos :] in fact all of your works do and made me love baji even more than i did before >:O i don't have a bad pun for you but honestly considering my punmanship you're lucky jdkfjskf

@shinscig i've interacted with you a grand total of one (1) time but you're so sweet :( i think your chifuyu drabble of painting flowers was one of the first fics i read here which: OOMPF /pos. that's it i can't describe it anymore better than that cause it's almost 3am. your braid train fic with mizo mid is also a big favourite :)! underrated they are

@softbajis You Have Made Me Feel Things but i swear most of it's good and soft besides the angst because it hurts so good hakfjwjfj i like seeing your little blurbs pop up from time to time!!

@tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang I LOVE SEEING YOUR POSTS ABOUT THE MANGA THAT ARE ESPECIALLY SO FUNNY??? they're always a riot and the absolute best. i snorted so hard reading your recent one of the wake me up scene SHEIWKJFWKFJDJ

@koffeekoko your angst. hurts so good. mr sunshine, flowers, and you hurts the best. i am writhing on the floor as i type this (/notsrs) idk if this is weird but seeing your tag "jel loves you!" makes me smile internally :)) your works about insecurities they love also make me really really happy :']

@n0vad your headcanons are so comforting to read,,, they also inspired me to post some of my own too in a similar format (hope you don't mind sjfhe)! i also love that you post for more characters that don't have a ton of content!!

@sunhee-sun your writing is like warm sun after cold rain (i'm a great poet) it's inviting and a guilty pleasure to reread all of your tokrev stuff. bows down to you.

@kakubun my main source of love for bonten. helping hands is one of my favourites and inspired me to make a character based off of that :D your headcanons are also so funny to read and have become a great source of inspo!!

@xuxitheii another whose tokrev x male reader has fed more life into me (°▽°)b i've probably went through your blog at least thrice now reading your works especially since you're one of the first i followed! good shjt right there... your confessing to mitsuya one is my fabourite

thats all i can roll out i think because i dint want to flood everyone's inboxes since your mutuals are doing this too skfjekfjjs ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ happy new year from this touma fish! 🐟 passes out

#chattertuna

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koishua · 2 years

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i’m cute? you’re cute! 💖💖

i’m also sorry for responding to this so late AKSNSH but school kicked my ass today,, had a long day of school + a shit ton of hw :’) i’m responding to this right before i go to bed though HAHA

i feel like getting to be more familiar is really just spending more time with e/o ig? so hopefully as more time passes, things would get better. tbh i don’t think they don’t respect my efforts HAHA honestly they all seem pretty chill, they’re just … really quiet ^_^ but yeah with things like this i think it’s a two-way street too, i can def try to be less in leader mode and more relaxed and casual w them! but it takes time yeah and i think it’ll get better when we get to know e/o better :]]

it is nice having familiar faces arnd! i’m a lot more comfy w them and we’ve also gotten closer ^_^ it rlly isn’t possible being close friends w so many ppl but i mean,, my mom alw tells me that you only need one or two close friends in your life and that’d suffice!

ooo what’s A Thousand Splendid Suns about? i haven’t been reading much outside of tumblr recently bc of sch :’) hopefully i can start a book soon tho! i’ve heard of Howl’s Moving Castle! unfortunately, i’ve never had the chance to watch it tho,, but i think one of my bucket list items is to watch all Studio Ghibli movies at least once! the art style is so pleasing i feel like i’d have a great time just appreciating the art! i’ve only watched spirited away from Studio Ghibli but i loved it a lot!!

for me,, i’d say my blanket HAHA it’s just like a security blanket (oops pun unintended) for me it’s so warm and cozy inside i just like to snuggle in it! actly i’m typing this ask while tucked into my blanket so i’m feeling so so comfy rn! 🥺 but i’m sorry if this ask doesn’t make sense i’m kinda sorta sleep deprived rn so i need to go to sleep SJDH sooo gn! (even tho we aren’t in the same time zone i think)

- school anon

(yes i’m fine being tagged as school anon … for now! it’s not a very,, pleasant name — cuz ew sch — but i don’t have any brain juice to think of a better anon name rn so i’ll just lyk when i’ve decided if i want to change my anon name/what i want to change it to!)

*insert infinite uno reverse card meme* ur cute times infinity plus one 🙁

im so sorry to hear that school has been treating you like this :(( things are difficult these days, so i hope they'll have some mercy on you guys and at least lighten things up a little bit there ://

ah so they're more low tension ppl, i get it heh :') how longs has it been with them anyways?? so yeah take it easy, love <3 and your mom's super correct too!! i always heard that you only need one true friend who'll stay with you when the other hundred turn against you haha it's kinda like a proverb so it doesn't really make as much sense in english but oh well you get my point. a handful good friends are enough 👌

the book im reading about narrates the life of a few afghan girls in the years 1960/70(ish)-present time and it's kind of triggering in some aspects, so definitely be a bit cautious if you ever decide to read it! i have a few issues with the book bc of how it portrays islam and muslim men and women and stuff (things that really do happen but my issue is just the fact that some people who read it might not get the diff between a culture and the religion they additionally practice and whatever but that's a story for another time!) just thought i should give it a read bc it's a literature classic (i guess, at least) there are so many beautiful quotes that i adore though :( im halfway through so i am not done yet heh

ah you've heard it okay!! omg spirited away is my absolute favourite studio ghibli movie ☹️‼️i have always watched it to comfort myself ever since i was a kid haha kind of nice too bc me and the movie were born in the same year!! can't say i have watched every single studio ghibli movie but everything i have watched just make me feel so complete and fuzzy an cozy inside :')

aww that's so sweet :( i can imagine the safety it brings haha have a cozy cozy warm little sleep then and make sure to try to catch enough hours of resting time‼️‼️us school kids gotta at least try to gather energy for the next day of battle smh

(do tell me when you need a name change bc yes ew skewl 🤢🤢)

#school anon

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moronfm · 4 years

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『 LANA CONDOR ❙ CIS FEMALE 』 ⟿ looks like VAL MORAN - PHAM is here for HER SOPHOMORE year as a ZOOLOGY student. SHE is 20 years old & known to be ENERGETIC , OUTSPOKEN , CLUMSY & DISTRACTED. they’re living in NOLAND , so if you’re there , watch out for them. ⬳

hello , peeps. i am el. a sleep deprived trash furby / frog disguised in human skin. i am 21 & a university drop out from crappy ol’ britain. here is val , my messy messy baby who doesn’t understand life that much. think nick from freeks and geeks but better at drums & less creepy ... so not really like him at all actually.

tw : adhd , depersonalisation , insomnia

STATS

full name : valentine althea moran - pham

nicknames : val , moron

age : twenty

zodiac : aquarius sun , gemini moon

sexuality : asexual , biromantic

parents : kitty moran & elodie pham

traits : laidback , energetic , outspoken , spooky bitch , distracted , clumsy

BIO

valentine was born to kitty and elodie moran - pham in early february of 2000. the youngest of four , life was always a little hectic. her parents are both scientists ( kitty a zoologist and elodie a botanist ) , so they often travelled due to work. maintaining friendships was a little difficult cause of this. but , other than that , honestly they all had a pretty decent childhood. the last place they settled in was hammersmith.

diagnosed with adhd when she was seven , which took years to happen. her parents didn’t want her on meds, though & school didn’t help much , they kind of just brushed her aside because they didn’t know what else to do. she struggled a lot and was constantly told by teachers that she wouldn’t do well in life because she didn’t pay attention and seemed to vibrate in her chair. was called moron moran a lot. fair to say all of that pissed her off so she was like screw that , i’m gonna show you , you stupid boobs. how hard can it be. she’s got coping strategies to help , but sometimes wonders if they’re worth it.

obsessed with science since she can remember - thank her moms. their influences definitely pushed her into her field of study , even if she isn’t certain about her future in it. she’s especially interested in herpetology and cryptozoology.

was given her first musical instrument when she was six , to keep her occupied when they first started noticing symptoms. it was a bassoon and as long as she lives will never pick up that bloody thing again. as of now , she remembers a little bit of cello , but favours playing drums. she got her first kit when she was eight. after that , all hell let loose. man , did they regret that for a long time.

she started to suffer from depersonalisation and insomnia during her teenage years - tries to hide it as much as possible. she feels a little lost as to who she is as a person and a little numb at times. often doesn’t recognise who’s looking back in a mirror.

joined her first ever band when she was sixteen. was a lo-fi band , but they broke up when they all graduated. during her first year of college , she started a riot girl band with a couple of friends and they’re still going strong.

like her mother , kitty , she is pagan. litha’s coming up and a bitch is ready ( i however am not. ) she’s also got a mini alter in her room cause she couldn’t bring all her things with her. catch her collecting herbs.

EXTRA

pinterest can be found here - wic

a skateboarder

cool socks or go home

dyes her hair too much

more stats here

forgets birthdays a lot , even her own

bugs. bugs all round.

intelligent but no common sense

WANTED CONNECTION

she plays the drums in a band so members for that would be cool. just like lead vocals , bassist and guitarist etc. heavily inspired by bikini kill.

anyone who’s willing to let her ramble about music or cryptids or anything

a bug dealer

a fellow sciencer would be justy peachy or even a zoologist

someone at noland who hates hearing her drums all the time

and really anything. i’m very sleep deprived rn so thats all my brain could say.

#radintro

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lunasaturnine · 4 years

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noise noise noise. you dont even look at different channels. it’s all just one channel. and all the noise is the same. you wanna tune into noise? get into one of your feeds and start scrolling. ntohing going on? here, why don’t you take some noise. noise noise noise.

i can’t stand it. what’s the point of my life? what is going on? i want to expand and also i want to FEROCIUOSLY NOT EXPAND. FUCK WORKSHOPS. FUCK LEAVING MY HOUSE. FUCK GOING TO Ohio or kentucky or indiana or whatever fucking place and paying loads of money and people telling me what the fuck to do.

but also if i dont do that what the fuck, im depriving myself of learning opportunities that would be guaranteed to change my life

what does that mean. i don’t know what to do with the ability to make decisions about my own future. how can i make decisions about the future, from where i am right now? i don’t want to decide things further than a day before.

i ... have made some good inner progress but i feel im backtracking. last night i dreamed i had planted a bunch of cool plants but then they were like dying. i dont want to waste my soul. i know i am a highly developed person. i know i have focused intensely in my past lives. i know i have loved art and studied people and become sensitive and educated. so what am i doing? why do i feel this panic? what’s going on?

why do i tune into the Noise Channel? what do i think is in it for me? thank god for the computer so i can at least be creative again.

i thought i wanted to go to nashville over spring break. well here’s spring break and i still don’t know if i want to go to nashville. how am i going to be the sort of person who can visit her undergrad and give a master class if she can’t even decide to go? is that the kind of person i want to be? don’t i want to grow up and be a full person, don’t I want to complete circuits? I JUST DON’T KNOW! do i want to be a hermit? I JUST DONT KNOW! i just don’t want to be in this position.

i feel the crisis of choice that happens to libras and i want to cancel it violently like caps do. that is my cap suicidal ideation. i usually don’t deal with it but lately i am so frustrated by who i am that it is happening. that is stupid. why am i so frustrated? its PISCES SEASON. that’s SLEEP SEASON. who knows that better than i do??? so why do i beat myself up? i dont want this kind of inner life.

i’ll play bach now. maybe i’ll drive up to nashville next week. i think that would be fun. i don’t think it would make me feel crazy. maybe i can stay with ****. that would be nice. i think it would feel good because i would be surrounded by love, of a sort. maybe i’ll do that for like three days. then come home get lunch with ****** on the way. i dont think ill go to memphis and see ****** that’s way out of my way and i don’t think it would be very fun. i’ll play bach now.

it is not all this misery in my inner life there are nice things i want to write about on here too. I GUESS. none of my thrust is outward and it’s making me panic, why cant i just chill and enjoy it? plooto is in my fourth rn. uranus in my....7th... haha. sun in my sixth. so i’m just going to chill. chill. chill. and play bach. and chill.

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pavlovers · 5 years

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some time ago @britneyshakespeare tagged me in a couple of those things where you bold the one you prefer so im finally gonna sit down and just knock them both out in one post. merci diana <3

honey and lemon or milk and sugar

musicals or plays

lemonade or iced tea

why would i choose when snapple’s pink lemonade and raspberry iced tea flavors both exist in peaceful harmony like that

strawberries or raspberries

winter or summer

both can be somewhat lonely. at least one doesn’t give me chronic sleep deprivation

beaches or forests

diners or cafés

i barely am up early enough to frequent either

unicorns or dragons

not really sensing a strong opinion brewing forth on either. y'know ill just pick dragons because jane and the dragon was a cool show growing up even if the animation was a tad atrocious

gemstones or crystals

who cares theyre both just cool rocks

hummingbirds or owls

kinda arbitrary but eh. at least one doesnt throw up bones for you to dissect in elementary school

fireworks or sparklers

both fine, just dont get them near me because ive got sort of an irrational fear of getting burned

brunch or happy hour

sweet or sour

ive never gotten the hype behind sour candies like. why are sour patch kids so popular??? theyre just gummy candies with shitty tasting salt on them.

Rome or Amsterdam

oh idk. im quite partial to Paris myself

classic or modern art

the only art medium i frequently and consistently consume is probably music and well.. you don't really see me getting down to classical music unless i need "claude debussy - CLAIRE DE LUNE (5 HOUR LOOP)" to help me focus on studying. i mostly listen to stuff post-1950s, really none of which i would consider "classic art".

sushi or ramen

sun or moon

polka dots or stripes

ill finally come into my own once i obtain a pair of flared striped pants

macaroons or croissants

glitter or matte

ive no preference on the shininess of most surfaces

Degas or Seurat

my art history knowledge is just too limited for this

aquariums or planetariums

fish r cool 🐠 my middle school had a planetarium but im pretty it was long broken before i ever got there

road trip or camping trip

if i ever stop becoming completely exhausted after a mere 45 minutes of driving then yes, id love to do a road trip someday

colouring books or watercolour

fairy lights or candles

well i just straight up dont own fairy lights. and i barely use candles for aesthetic purposes

and here commences the 2nd one:

coffee or tea

i really don’t like either as hot beverages but yeah,, iced tea >> iced coffee

early bird or night owl

although ap season is approaching and that really requires you to be both honestly

chocolate or vanilla

spring or fall

nothing against spring weather wise i just am not at ALL excited for testing rn tbh

silver or gold

pop or alternative

i think both of those genres tend to overlap a lot these days so i really couldn’t say i have a stronger preference for one than the other. they both have their respective great and not-so-great moments

freckles or dimples

i have neither but they’re both v cute on others! :)

snakes or sharks

hmm ive pet both and snakes feel really cool while shark skin can like?? cut you if youre not careful so

mountains or fields

civilization?

thunderstorm or lightning

well yknow one’s loud and scary sounding and the other just makes a little light streak across the sky

egyptian mythology or greek mythology

honestly i just wasnt a mythology kid growing up

ivory or scarlet

flute or lyre

eyes or lips

mostly because i can draw the former a lot better than the latter

witch or fairy

opal or diamond

i just looked up opal on google images and honestly those things look way cooler than diamonds

butterflies or honeybees

nothing against bees! just have a really strong fear of them because when i was a kid i had a bee crawl into my ear and sting me on 2 separate occasions and ive never really gotten over it

macarons or eclairs

typewritten or handwritten

just for convenience’s sake and the fact that i am not my handwriting’s biggest fan

secret garden or secret library

god that would be my 9 year old self’s DREAM,, creeping in there late at night and falling asleep in an oversized office chair with a leather bound copy of the grimm's fairy tales wide open on a big mahogany desk

rooftop or balcony

spicy or mild

opera or ballet

london or paris

vincent van gogh or claude monet

im only familiar with a few of either’s works so i guess its not up to me to say

denim or leather

potions or spells

its like basically the same thing except you get to drink something out of a strange funky little bottle

ocean or desert

would prefer to not be dying due to severe temperature extremes

mermaid or siren

masquerade ball or cocktail party

not that i’d attend either but showing up somewhere in the most decadent ball gown and have no one know who the fuck you are sounds pretty ideal

umm ill tag @curebian @britishsixtiesbeat @johnwettons @dalliscar and @villarosie if any of them feel like doing either one (or both) of the tag games.

#tag thing #god im beat #anyone who's reading this who wants to do any part of this can just ignore me saying stuff in between im just oversharing to myself here

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sasshole-for-rent · 6 years

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Getting To Know Me

I was tagged by @galadrieljones I think. I suck at keeping up with these. Sorry, bby applesauce.

Rules: Answer the questions then tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

Name: Riann.

Gender: Female.

Star Sign: Capricorn Sun, Libra Moon.

Height: 5'4" I think.

Age: 20 (still feel robbed of my childhood, thnx punta madre.)

Wallpaper on my phone: My lockscreen is a noir Solas, and my wallpaper is another different noir Solas. The thrist is real.

House: two bedroom apartment in the city (I fucking miss the forest! I literally got yelled at by Julie, the woman who owns the apartments, to stop pulling needles off the tree and I just continued doing it while staring at her.) with ample magic space to politely ask candles to help out my buds. Oh! Plus, a huge ass basement to dance to cotton-eyed joe at 5 am because sleep deprivation is a thing.

Ever crush on a teacher: No, but all my favorite teachers were all dudes. I take that back. Most were dudes. My spanish/chemistry teacher was amazing and I am friends with her on Pinterest.

Coolest Halloween Costume: when I was little I had this dragon costume that I wore every year until I grew out of it. I just wanted to be a dragon, still do.

Favorite 90's tv show: Um. All of them? Literally everything on Nickelodeon was lit back then! Then Teen Nick & Nick Toons i.e Zoey 101, ICarly, The Amanda Show, That one temple game show that I can't remember the name of right now, Avatar: The last Airbender, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Invader Zim, etc.

Last Kiss: my grandma when she was in the hospital.

Have you ever been stood up: Not that I can remember. I don't think so.

Favorite pair of shoes: Nah. Barefoot, memory foam slippers, or those fuzzy lavender infused dream socks.

Have you ever been to Vegas: Nope.

Favorite Fruit: Gala apples, kiwis, and bananas. All fruit is delicious tho. How do I pick just one?

Favorite Book: Daughter of Smoke and Bone series by Laini Taylor. Plus, Strange the Dreamer also by Laini Taylor. Her writing is just phenomenal and whimsical and I hope to be like her one day.

Stupidest thing you have ever done: *nervous cackling* oh god, just one stupid thing? I ran threw cow shit bare foot, got high off of pot cookies during my senior trip and reverse pick pocketed little toy soldiers into the guys that were going away into the military (I was friends with them, they were good dudes.) Then I did it to my ex, which caught me because I was super slow with my movements and just sat there laughing with my hand in his pocket because it was stuck. Then he just laughed painfully and removed my hand, on that same trip, this teacher whom everyone disliked bought the whole class ice cream and I screamed "Daddy [Teacher's last name] is buying us icecream!!!!" and just before that on the bus, I put my thumb against some dude's camera when he was taking a selfie and..we just kind of laughed awkwardly at each other (because I was blocking the back camera), I also screamed and freaked out because there was a mayfly under my hand buzzing against my palm when I grabbed a cart at Walmart and it was terrifying.

All time favorite shows: Sense8, Game of Thrones, Teen Wolf, Awkward, The Shannara Chronicles. (I haven't watched shows in awhile tho. My aunt is the one with Netflix.)

Last movie I saw in theaters: ummmm. Oh! It was Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children. I think it was an impluse outing with my best bud, @brassdragon0 and two dudes. And me and her just inappropriately laughed through the whole thing because we were confused and get like that around each other. Lol.

I tag: @dismalzelenka @joufancyhuh @sylveonne @suzumicchi @nilesdaughter @4vrafangirl ugh. Just six because I can't remember urls rn.

#sass does an overshare #tag game #weeee

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atl-dreaming · 4 years