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hunflowers · 1 year

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pull me in

a/n: okayyyyyyyy a little writing because i missed writing but it's been hard writing a big story. satellite blurb about friend!harry and (thought to be) unrequited love hehe

Everyone knew the feelings you two had for each other. The feelings that went unannounced every day for years.

The constant questions you would ask about him, wondering where he was. The constant wondering if you actually liked him or if he was just reading you wrong. It was like this for years but life kept going, never once allowing you to stop and think, eventually causing you to drift apart.

The infatuation, admiration, and love were persistent, though, no matter how far apart you grew. You weren't exactly sure why.

When you turned eighteen, you went off to university in London to study education, and Harry had pursued his career in music. You had your mutual friends but it had been years since you physically saw or spoke to him. You had boyfriends and lovers and focused intently on your studies and career, so the pestering thought of a particular famous musician should've gone away. It was your plan, after all.

After a night out where you drunkenly admitted your feelings to an also drunk Harry and him not saying anything in return, you made sure to never embarrass yourself like that again.

Unbeknownst to you, however, Harry didn't hear you. Between the music, the slur of your words, and the guy talking in his left ear, he couldn't make out what you were trying to tell him. When he was trying to read your lips and form some sentence in his head, he saw the look on your face change and the smile you had quickly shaped into a frown. He was ready to ask you to repeat yourself but then that guy talking in his left ear stepped between you two to start talking to someone nearby. Then you ran off and Harry never knew what it was that you said.

It was a sore subject so even if your friends tried to talk to you about Harry and that night, you would quickly dismiss them, urging them to talk about anything else. Because you were so certain there was nothing to even talk about. He didn't harbor the same feelings as you, and that's okay, you couldn't force him to like you.

Over the course of the nearly ten years since that happened, you would be lying if you said you didn't listen to his music at all or notice him on tabloid covers. It was very hard to fully avoid someone that famous from your hometown who is still friends with your friends.

Though, you did a pretty good job if you did say so yourself. Through the rollout of his first two albums and the many invitations to his concerts, you always respectfully declined, saying you had too much to do to spend a night with screaming fangirls pining over the same man as you.

"Y/N, c'mon, it'll be fun! You haven't had a proper night out in a long time," Lynn, one of the few remaining links between you and Harry, and also your best friend, said. She pouted her lips, clasping her hands together and holding them under her chin to really emphasize her puppy-dog look. She had seen this trick far too many times with her students that she's immunized.

You shook your head, continuing to fold your laundry. "Sorry, babe, I'm just not feeling up for it. Concerts aren't m'thing."

Lynn scoffed, "No, his concerts aren't your thing. Which, in my opinion, is crazy because he knows how to put on a good show."

"That's great but I'm still not going."

"It's a free ticket!"

"Sorry."

It was the same fight for years. You just didn't want to go no matter how much your friends hype him up.

With his third album, however, your opinion slightly changed. Release day came and you picked a few songs to listen to. You liked them all which wasn't a surprise, but then you heard 'Satellite'.

You had no reason to believe it was about you because surely you weren't that lucky. But then you listened to it again and again. You got a new life, am I bothering you?

You called Lynn immediately. You had to know if someone else had the same thought. "I think so. I mean, he's been asking about you a lot lately, so I wouldn't be surprised."

"What do you mean he's been asking about me?"

"What else could that mean, Y/N?"

You sat in silence for a moment biting on your bottom lip. "What have you told him?"

"We've been telling him you 'aven't got time with anyone anymore because you only care about work."

"Lynn-"

"It's true, babe. You can't tell me it's not."

I can see you're lonely down there.

You laid in bed that night, staring at the ceiling. Before the phone call ended, Lynn said he invited you lot to his One Night Only show in London. She told you not to give her an answer yet and to actually think about this one before going off and dismissing everyone again.

You didn't think though because the next morning as soon as you woke up, you agreed to go. Just this once. For the experience. That's all.

You were so nervous when the day finally came. You asked if you would be seeing him before or after the show and Lynn said, "Probably both. Take a deep breath, it'll be fun."

You were let backstage when you arrived, escorted to a lounge where Harry and his family already were.

You nearly stopped in your tracks at the sight of him. It was a while since you’ve last been this close to him — but honestly, it wasn’t until you saw his face that you realized you truly have missed him.

You can’t decide how pathetic that is just yet, so you opt to get a drink from the mini bar set up before getting the chance to embarrass yourself.

However, Harry had also spotted you right away. He nearly leapt up from his seat when he saw that you actually took him up on his invitation. He remained cool though, casually getting up and making his way over towards you.

“Y/N, hi, I’m so glad y’decided to come,” Harry spoke behind you, causing you to jump a little at the suddenness. You turned around, nearly at the same distance when you last confessed your feelings. You got a small little flashback to that time but quickly disregarded it, giving him a small smile before reaching over for a hug.

“I figured it was time to see just how good you are,” you laughed, making him give a small chuckle in return. Without either of you realizing, the hug lasted a good while. You just stood there in each other’s embrace because this was a moment long in the making. You had every right to embrace it — and him.

And when that moment came that you both realized you should probably let go, you did; but not completely. Your hands remained on his shoulders and his on your hips as you stared into each others eyes, trying to read whatever emotions you could.

Was this good? Was this what you needed? Could you tell if he’s missed you as much as you have him?

You think yes is the answer to all of these questions. You both shared a small smile before completely distancing, waving him goodbye as he was urged to make his way to stage.

Lynn was watching the whole thing from across the room. Little to your knowledge, Lynn told Harry what happened that night all those years ago. How you confessed your feelings and was heartbroken because it seemed like he didn’t even care that you told him.

He did care. A lot. But by the time she told Harry, you had already began your distancing, opting to never seeing him again, despite him wanting to talk a few times. So he moved on just like you did, or so he thought he did (or so you thought you did).

But in that very moment, you, Harry, and Lynn knew that this was the start of something beautiful, this was the start of something that should’ve happened a long time ago. And when he goes on stage tonight to sing that special song, he’ll be looking for you, singing it for you.

Spinning out, waiting for ya to pull me in.

#so this has been in my drafts forever????? didn’t even realize #i never quite finished the ending but i figured y’all deserve to read this #harry styles fic #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles fluff #harry styles

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iwanthermidnightz · 6 days

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*excerpts below — but I highly recommend reading the full article in link above*

Hit Me Hard and Soft dunks us headfirst back into that universe, from the deepest wallows of depression to the exhaustion that comes with the world speculating about her every move. There are no arachnids where they shouldn’t be, but getting in touch with her darker side has Eilish finally feeling like herself again. “I feel like this album is me,” she says. “It’s not a character. It feels like the When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go? version of me. It feels like my youth and who I was as a kid.”

Although 2019 felt like a whirlwind of madness at the time, she has found herself missing it. “It was the best time of my life,” she says. “This whole process has felt like I’m coming back to the girl that I was. I’ve been grieving her. I’ve been looking for her in everything, and it’s almost like she got drowned by the world and the media. I don’t remember when she went away.”

The title Hit Me Hard and Soft derives from a conversation she had with Finneas, when she mistakenly thought the name of a synth in Logic Pro was called Hit Me Hard and Soft. “I thought it was such a perfect encapsulation of what this album does,” she explains. “It’s an impossible request: You can’t be hit hard and soft. You can’t do anything hard and soft at the same time. I’m a pretty extremist person, and I really like when things are really intense physically, but I also love when things are very tender and sweet. I want two things at once. So I thought that was a really good way to describe me, and I love that it’s not possible.”

Eilish and Finneas call Hit Me Hard and Soft “an album-ass album.” It’s not a concept record, but it is a self-consciously cohesive set of songs, inspired by auteurist works from the past 15 years or so, like Coldplay’s Viva La Vida, Lana Del Rey’s Born to Die, Tyler, the Creator’s Goblin, Marina and the Diamonds’ Electra Heart, and Vince Staples’ Big Fish Theory.

“Lunch,” a complete 180 in both sound and subject content. It’s a sexy, bass-heavy banger where Eilish is crushing on a girl so hard she likens sex with her to devouring a meal. Finneas remembers playing this moment for Interscope and witnessing the team shift in their seats. “What’s funny about starting the album with [the opener] is that it is a total false promise,” he says. “If you’re remembering ‘What Was I Made For?’ and then you hear [it], you go, ‘Oh, OK. I understand this world.’ Then the drums come in [on “Lunch”], and it really is the kill-the-main-character-type beat. It’s like Drew Barrymore being in the first five minutes of Scream and then they kill her. You’re like, ‘They can’t kill Drew. Oh, my God, they killed Drew!’”

Eilish and I spend a lot of time talking about the new era she is about to kick off, and how she’ll promote Hit Me Hard and Soft while prioritizing her mental health, privacy, and well-being. With all of that in mind, I wonder if she’s ready for journalists to pepper her with questions about the album’s subject matter, particularly the sexual nature of “Lunch.” “That song was actually part of what helped me become who I am, to be real,” Eilish says. “I wrote some of it before even doing anything with a girl, and then wrote the rest after. I’ve been in love with girls for my whole life, but I just didn’t understand — until, last year, I realized I wanted my face in a vagina. I was never planning on talking about my sexuality ever, in a million years. It’s really frustrating to me that it came up.”

Eilish is referring to her interview with Variety last fall, in which she mentioned she was attracted to women. The quote — “I’m attracted to them for real” — became a national headline. The following month, Eilish attended Variety’s Hitmakers event in L.A. While on the red carpet, she was asked if she intentionally came out in the story. “No, I didn’t,” she told them. “But I kind of thought, ‘Wasn’t it obvious?’” Eilish then posted about it on Instagram, with a caption that read, “Thanks Variety for my award and for also outing me on a red carpet at 11 a.m. instead of talking about anything else that matters. I like boys and girls leave me alone about it please literally who cares.”

Looking back, Eilish admits she overreacted with the Instagram post. “Who fucking cares?” she says. “The whole world suddenly decided who I was, and I didn’t get to say anything or control any of it. Nobody should be pressured into being one thing or the other, and I think that there’s a lot of wanting labels all over the place. Dude, I’ve known people that don’t know their sexuality, or feel comfortable with it, until they’re in their forties, fifties, sixties. It takes a while to find yourself, and I think it’s really unfair, the way that the internet bullies you into talking about who you are and what you are.”

As for that red-carpet quote that made all the headlines, Eilish says she tried to think of a response that would be entertaining for her fans and the internet. “I went into Billie Eilish interview mode, [like], ‘Oh, I don’t care. Yeah, I’ll say whatever. Wasn’t it obvious?’” she says. “And then afterwards I was like, ‘Wait. It wasn’t obvious to me.’”

Thinking about it now, she draws a bigger lesson from that moment. “I know everybody’s been thinking this about me for years and years, but I’m only figuring out myself now,” she says. “And honestly, what I said was funny, because I really was just saying what they’ve all been saying.” She adds that she liked the journalist she was talking to and didn’t want to be rude. But she still felt exploited. “Bro, I have asthma out here,” she says. “I fucking can’t take a breath.”

If Eilish had the opportunity to do it over again on the red carpet, she says, she wouldn’t have answered the question. But she acknowledges it could have been worse. “I’m lucky enough to be in a time when I’m able to say something like that and things go OK for me,” she says. “And that’s not how a lot of people’s experience is.”

Eilish has officially decided to make some changes to the way she presents herself to the world. “This album, to me, feels like a way to restart, in terms of my sharing,” she says. So let’s take a second to reintroduce Billie Eilish, the home-schooled bohemian who captured our attention as a teenager. She’s 22 now, yet she’s more self-aware than people twice her age. She would like some space to grow, to figure out exactly who she is — no label required. She is not the poster child for anything. And she is not, she’d like to note, a TED Talk speaker. So where does that leave us? Eilish sums things up with four simple words that point to her desire for normalcy and acceptance.

“I’m just a girl.”

#please read the whole article from this link #she really went there #billie eilish

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dreamcatcher92 · 2 months

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Coercion Chapter Four

So this is my second smut story that I have been working on. I am hoping you all enjoy!

It is a bit dark. Yes, Billy Russo is of course our main character aside from a girl named Cassidy. Who is completely made up and meant to be played by the reader. The other characters that are mentioned in this story are made up as well and not based on anyone in particular. I did this one differently than my first story, but I wanted to switch up my writing style a bit. So you may see more differences in other stories to come. Things that are bold and italicized are thoughts.

Now for some warnings for the entire story but necessarily in the current chapter you read: dark Billy for sure, non-con, dub-con, kidnapping, NSFW, 18+, smut, sex, rape, attempted rape, physical violence, abusive behavior, language. I think that covers it, but sorry if I missed something.

Read at your own risk.

Days had passed and each day, things seemed to get better and better. Cassidy kept thinking that this was so strange because here she is living with a man that she does not know and who literally bought her from her kidnappers, yet she feels somewhat comfortable around him. Could this be some sort of trick? But what would he be tricking her to do? So many thoughts raced through her head at lightning speed.

She snapped out of her thoughts suddenly because as she sat up in bed, she could smell the scent of bacon in the air. Eggs and toast too? Her mouth started watering and a childhood memory began to flood her brain.

Every morning when she was a little girl, her mother would always have a huge breakfast spread ready for Cassidy and her sister Olivia to devour before starting their day. She had an amazing mother who did everything she could for her girls and a caring older sister that always watched out for her. Even though Olivia was only two years older than Cassidy, she felt like it was her duty to make sure nothing happened to her sister.

Cassidy’s father left when she was three and was never really in her life. He would send cards and letters, but never came around or made the effort to spend time with his daughters. Cassidy didn’t know much about him other than he was an alcoholic, used drugs, and left her mother to be with another woman he met one night at a bar.

All was well until one day when Cassidy was fourteen. Olivia had stayed home from school sick that day, so Cassidy was stuck walking home alone from school. She was listening to her portable CD player, singing along to the songs on Avril Lavigne’s new album.

She was in her own little world, when two police cruisers and an ambulance went rushing by her with sirens blaring. She didn’t think much of it because she didn’t live in the nicest of neighborhoods. Being that her mom had to work two part-time jobs just to make ends meet, she found the safest place she could to raise her daughters alone. However, as years passed and the girls grew, the neighborhood began to get worse and worse.

When she turned the corner onto her street, she saw that the police officers and ambulance were at her house. Mom?! Livvy?! She took off running as fast as she could toward the flashing red and blue lights.

“Woah, woah, woah! You can’t go past the yellow tape hun.” an officer said to her as he grabbed her and held her back.

She fought him hard, “I live here!! Where is my mom?! Where is my sister?! Please! Let go of me!”

“Shit.” the officer looked at her tearfilled eyes and looked around to find someone to help him with her.

“WHAT HAPPENED!” she screamed.

A female officer came sprinting over to help her partner. She spun Cassidy around and gripped her shoulders. She couldn’t help but to tear up when she saw the fear on Cassidy’s face.

“Sweetie, you need to take a breath and calm down just a bit, okay?” she said as calmly as she could.

Cassidy shook her head, “No! Tell me what is going on! Please ma’am! I just want my mom!”

Officer’s ended up taking her down to the police station to get her away from the crime scene. They did not want her to see the gruesome scene that was left behind in the house. Eventually, two women walked into the room where Cassidy sat hugging her knees. One woman was the police officer from earlier and the other was a state social worker with Child Protective Services.

They sat down with Cassidy and explained to her that her father, in an impaired state, broke into the family home that morning just before her mother had left for work. He shot her mother and sister to death and then turned the gun on himself. He left behind a note explaining that all he wanted was for his family to be together again forever, and that he was sorry to Cassidy that she wasn’t there to go with them to Heaven.

“Cass?” Billy said, causing Cassidy to jump and come out of the horrific trance that she was in.

“Billy! I’m s-sorry! I was…I was..”

“Hey, hey. You okay?” he said as he sat down on the side of the bed with her and wrapped an arm around her waist.

She couldn’t look at him, “F-fine. I’m fine. Just thinking of something from when I was little is all.”

He pulled her closer to him and brushed a tear from her cheek, “Whatcha thinkin’ about?”

She told him the story and how the smell of breakfast made her remember. She explained to him that it was nothing that he did, and that she would be okay. He smiled after hearing this and hugged her tight.

“How about we go eat before it gets too cold, huh?” he said, still holding her tightly against his chest.

She grinned, “Okay.”

As they ate, she couldn’t help but think that maybe this whole situation would be okay. They finished eating and Billy explained to her that she would need to do chores today. Dishes, laundry, and dusting were on her list today while he worked in his office for a while to get caught up on some things.

Cassidy placed the dishes into a sink full of hot soapy water to let them soak while she loaded the washer with Billy’s clothes. After finishing with the dishes, she checked to see if the washer was finished, but it still had two more cycles to go through. So, she decided to start dusting things in the living room. This was the first time Billy had asked her to do this chore in the almost two weeks that she had been there.

While dusting, she hummed a tune and focused on getting everything spotless for Billy. She was going down the items on the fireplace mantel and was not paying attention like she should have been. After wiping off what looked to her like some sort of small ashtray with writing inside in a language she didn’t know, she sat it back onto the mantel. However, the rag caught on the tiny ashtray and it fell to the ground shattering into shards of glass.

The entire house was completely silent, so when the ashtray crashed to the floor, it echoed throughout the rooms. Cassidy began to shake. What have you done!? She began to shake even more when she looked over to see a very pissed off Billy Russo standing there staring daggers into her.

“B-Billy. I-I…” was all she could mutter.

Billy said nothing as he swiftly walked over to Cassidy and backhanded her across the face causing her to fall hard to the floor. She let out a gasp as she felt the blow and fell. She began to cry and looked up at Billy in complete shock.

In a low devilish voice he said, “Do you have ANY idea what you’ve just done?”

“Please Billy! I didn’t mean to! I swear! It was an accident!” She cried out.

“I got that when I was fighting in Afghanistan.” He said as he pulled her off the floor and to her feet by her hair.

She grabbed his hands that held tightly onto the fistful of her hair and begged, “Please, I’m so sorry! Please don’t hurt me!”

“Did you think just because we had a few good days that you wouldn’t have punishments anymore?!”

“No! I didn’t think that at all! I swear!”

“Clean this up. NOW!” He screamed into her face.

He released his grip on her hair and slapped her once more before beginning to walk away.

He paused at the start of the hallway, “When you’re done cleaning up the glass, come to my office. Understand?”

“Yes, Billy. I understand.” She said in a shaky voice.

Cassidy quickly cleaned up the mess and rushed down the hallway. She came to a grinding halt when she stood just outside Billy’s office door. She was so terrified of what could be coming for her once she walked inside the room.

Taking a deep breath, she knocked on the door. She heard Billy tell her to come in. She gently opened the door and stepped inside to see Billy standing beside his desk sipping on his favorite whiskey.

“Come here.” he said as he sat his cup down on his desk.

Cassidy obeyed his order and slowly walked over to him. She gradually lifted her head and looked into his dark eyes. He met her gaze with a scowl.

“Go over to that wall and place your hands flat against it above your head as high as you can reach.” Billy snarled as he gestured with his head where he wanted her to go.

Cassidy sheepishly looked at the wall, “Yes, Billy.”

She went over and placed her palms onto the cold wall. She reached her arms as high as they would go without being on her tiptoes. Tears began to flow down her cheeks as she waited for Billy to give her instructions on what else she needed to do.

He creeped up behind her, placed his hands on her hips, and whispered into her ear, “If you so much as lift a finger off this wall before I tell you to, I’ll cut them off one by one. Got it?”

Cassidy felt a wave of nausea sweep over her and she felt like she was going to pass out from how afraid she was right now. Would he really do that? She had no idea, but she was not about to fuck around to find out.

“Y-Yes Billy.” she whimpered as she frantically nodded her head.

Billy kissed her cheek and went back over to his computer. Cassidy was so uncomfortable and her arms began to go completely numb. She could no longer feel her fingertips after a few minutes. Billy would take breaks and sit back in his office chair. He would sip on his drink and watch Cassidy struggle.

After about thirty minutes, Billy stood up and began to walk over to where she stood. He grabbed Cassidy’s arms and gently lowered them. He turned her around to face him, but she was too afraid to look at him.

“Look at me Cass.” he demanded in a low voice.

She cautiously raised her head and met eyes with Billy. Tears flowed down her cheeks, but she didn’t dare break eye contact.

Billy grabbed her chin with force, “That’s just a taste of the kind of discipline that you’ll have. That was just mild compared to what could happen if you act up or disobey me. Do you understand me?”

With her bottom lip quivering, Cassidy answered, “Y-yes Billy, I-I understand.”

“Good. In a few weeks, we’re going to be going into the city for a work party. I want to trust you, so you’re going to have to be a good girl for me and show me that I can trust you around people and going out in public. Think you can do that?” He asked while loosening his grip on her jaw.

“Yes! I can be a good girl Billy, I promise!” She said enthusiastically.

Cassidy wanted to prove to Billy that he could take her places. She wanted the calmness to come back into the house. She was going to do whatever it took so that Billy would trust her and that things could smooth back out.

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harrisonarchive · 1 year

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George and Olivia Harrison in 1974 and 2001 (photo 2 by AP Photo).

Song spotlight as part of the 20th anniversary look at Brainwashed: "Never Get Over You" —

Q: “Were you going down fast [prior to meeting Olivia in 1974]?” George Harrison: “Well, I wasn’t ready to join Alcoholics Anonymous or anything — I don’t think I was that far gone — but I could put back a bottle of brandy occasionally, plus all the other naughty things that fly around. I just went on a binge, went on the road… all that sort of thing, until it got to the point where I had no voice and almost no body at times. Then I met Olivia and it all worked out fine. There’s a song on the new album, ‘Dark Sweet Lady’: ‘You came and helped me through/When I’d let go/You came from out the blue/Never have known what I’d done without you.’ That sums it up.” - Rolling Stone, April 19, 1979

“‘I am still having a relationship with him, but it is just not a physical relationship any more. And the sooner one comes to terms with that, the easier it is, rather than feeling George has gone and he is never coming back.’ Does she communicate with him? ‘I don’t really want to get into all that. That’s a dodgy question to answer because people might think… I don’t know if you have ever had anybody go who you have loved? Well, you do feel in communication with them because you feel so deeply in your heart that if you say a prayer, it goes straight to them.’ Olivia says that, towards the end, when he knew he was dying, her husband would comfort her by saying: ‘Olivia, you’ll be fine, you’ll be fine.’ And is she? ‘Fine is OK, but it is not really good enough, is it? But George was right, I am fine and I am OK, although I will miss him until my dying day. But he walked his road and now I have to walk mine.’” - The Telegraph, January 24, 2005 (x)

#George Harrison #Olivia Harrison #quote #quotes about George #quotes by George #harrison songwriting #Harrisongs #ghbrainwashed20 #Brainwashed #george and olivia #Harrison spirituality #Dark Sweet Lady #fits queue like a glove

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tomb-bloom-noctem · 11 months

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Not am I only feeling very critical towards Taylor Swift due to her choice in Guy She's Dating right now and the implications about where her morals REALLY lie and questioning now how much of her activism has been for publicity but also what the fuck is she doing with all this marketing nonsense happening.

The exclusive CD just for "You're Losing Me" when her show tickets are so hard to come by for many folks, the Karma feat. Ice Spice collab is weirdly put together. Rap isn't my favorite music but even I am aware that Ice Spice is VERY talented yet the song kinda??? Fails to play into her strengths??? Also since Taylor recently released Karma as a single you'd think she'd actually wait until the Ice Spice version was ready and release THAT version as a single. Then of course there's the mess of He Who I Am Not Gonna Name and his garbage plus his beef with Ice Spice then the timing of this release...doesn't look good. Now I'm still feeling inclined to think this collab has probably been in the works for a little while at least since I can only imagine the legal side of things takes some time. But at the same time the poorer quality (in my opinion) of Ice Spice's parts does contribute to it feeling a little rushed. Seriously I don't hate the idea of this collab at all but it really feels like they just tried to shove Ice Spice in there instead of naturally making room for her.

And furthermore, I just kinda personally despise "Feat. MORE Lana Del Rey" The song sounds great. If rumor is to be believed this was how the song was supposed to turn out but Lana didn't know what part she was supposed to sing?? So it was submitted as the original version??? And Taylor just left it??? Instead of reaching out and saying hey actually let's rework this??? Like girl you have sooo much money you can easily get back in that recording studio wtf. I do actually like how the original Snow on the Beach but at the same time I'm so confused as to why it was allowed to just go forward if this newer version was supposed to be the original version. It feels like either the original SOTB was never supposed to be a duet only a feature and it was overly marketed as a duet or...Taylor and/or her label really not paying attention. Don't like either of those. So, to rerecord what should have already existed in the first place to sell a whole priced album again for one new song (which wasn't a new song since apparently it was on physical additions of Midnights), one collab that needed more time in the oven, and now the "real" version of an existing song stupidly called "feat. MORE Lana del Rey"...Seriously you guys couldn't have extended the music a bit and called it "extended edition" or something. For some reason just the way it's titled and knowing the supposed background of the song has me scratching my head and feeling a little rubbed the wrong way.

I don't know if I'm explaining this coherently at all but the whole situation feels a lot like a mess, a bit of a scam, and a lot like a PR move. Feels to me like Taylor's got a lot of yes men in her corner at the moment. And I'm sure she's plenty powerful enough to go "actually I'm still gonna do what I want" even if there are people telling her no. But really feels like she's flying in so many chaotic and messy directions at once with no one telling her she should slow it down, reign it in and think about this a little more. She's very smart and very talented yes, I am still a fan of hers! I've been a fan since 2006! But not gonna lie! I feel deceived and betrayed by her thanks to her being with MH and a lot of her business decisions lately are very confusing. Don't even get me started on how CHEAP the VIP boxes and a lot of this tour merch is turning out to be despite how expensive it all is.

Taylor, can I ask YOU a question. What the fuck.

#tomb talks #long post #taylor swift #swiftie #critical #discourse #ice spice #lana del ray #confused and heart broken #anti matty healy

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simmysunset · 5 months

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Whoever Loves Her Next - 02

*Trigger warning for mention of drug abuse*

The wait from finding out I was pregnant to getting on the plane was almost unbearable. The soonest flight out of Mason’s home in California wasn’t for another two days, and those two days were full of lies. To myself, my work, and probably worst of all - my parents. I promised them I’d be home after a week and a half of spending time with Mason, and now I was supposed to be exploring some sights for an extra two days. Instead, I’m flying to Florida where Harry has been on his songwriting retreat.

Thankfully, I had enough trust in our mutual friend Alex to tell me when it was best to come. I’ve known him for years, having met him back when Pink Nemesis was still together. It took Harry a while to introduce me to any of his fellow bandmates or staff, but he eventually caved and took me to see them for my birthday four years ago. Alex had been the one both Harry and I got along with the most, so it made sense that they’d still be working together even after the band split.

Things are so different now than they were then. It hurts somewhere deep in my chest to think back to last year and everything that happened leading up to the end of the band. It started with one of the members going to rehab for a drug overdose, and following more physical fights than I can count on one hand, the final nail in the coffin was Michael.

Because of what happened, nobody blamed Harry for not being able to pick himself back up and plaster a fake smile for concert after concert. Pink Nemesis breaking up was the last thing he wanted, but he had been the first one to suggest the idea. The rest of the members put up little resistance. After six years of constant albums and world tours, they were drained. And now, everyone who had been a part of the band was almost unrecognizable.

While one member returned to a life of working 9-5 and going to church on Sundays, another went solo almost immediately and crashed and burned. The third stayed somewhere in the middle of it all, collaborating with other artists here and there while also settling down with his soon-to-be wife. Then there was Harry.

After Michael, his only comforts were his guitar and bottles of alcohol. I can still remember all the countless times I tried to pull him out of it. Still hear me screaming at him to look at me. Still feel myself walking away from him when he probably needed it most.

As for me, I expected myself to be far from where I am now. After our breakup, I thought I would be out partying with friends until the sun came up.

I thought I would flirt with guys without a care in the world.

Hell, I even thought maybe I’d find a new fling.

But most importantly of all, I thought I’d learn to fall in love with being alive again.

But I hadn’t done any of that. Instead, I laid in my room crying my heart out when I thought of the fact that Harry and I were over. I remained jobless for over a month just so I could stay home doing nothing all day. I ignored my friends, my family, and the voice telling me that leaving Harry was a mistake.

All of these things had led to this moment. Stepping off the plane and into Alex’s awaiting arms, who is ready to wipe away the tears the moment they fall. I take advantage of the moment of peace being close to him, knowing that all hell would break loose the moment I saw Harry again.

previous | next

#i love alex btw #he's so cute and sweet #not to say i don't love harry but like #they have different vibes yknow?#get ready to meet the man in the next part #sims 4 story #sims 4 storytelling #*whoever loves her next #tw drugs #drugs tw #tw drug mention #tw drug use #tw drug overdose

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swifterthancivility · 6 months

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It's very weird to me that people don't believe Taylor's vault tracks were written at the time of the album or like the era of the album.

I mean first of all Taylor never said these were fully recorded and produced songs ready to go that got cut at the very last second. I think that's what people envisioned but the truth is there were probably a lot of times during the process where songs were cut or added. And maybe some of these songs were cut because 2014 Taylor couldn't finish working on them. Maybe some of the songs were not whole ideas yet or fully realized. That doesn't mean that she is lying when she says they were attached to this era.

And maybe I'm just not a talented writer but if you asked me to write a poem in the style I was using in 2014 I physically could not do it. Like it just wouldn't be possible to get into that mindset again for me. And I don't think Miss "I've never been a natural all I do is try try try" Swift is that different from me in that regard. I think she could edit a song she'd started on a few years ago, but I don't think she has it in her to fabricate songs whole cloth from an era she has left behind.

And finally all the vault tracks have been pretty of their era. I'm going to be honest, I'm not a huge fan of fearless and I wasn't a huge fan of most of the vault tracks. I really only liked Mr. Perfectly Fine. On the other hand I love Red and I loved all the vault tracks. Same with Speak now. And I mentioned before I kind of missed the 1989 era due to personal tragedies but now that I'm listening to it fully through it might be my first no skips Taylor Album (if we're going in order of re-releases) and I am obsessed with the vault tracks. All of the vault tracks fit perfectly into the albums in my opinion.

Fearless was kind of heartbroken and self indulgent so you get "you all over me" and "don't you". Red was as Taylor says, about a heartbroken person so we get "nothing new" and "forever winter" but we also get the other side of Red in "I'll bet you think about me" where she's kind of joking about her ex in a way she couldn't on previous albums. Speak now is all dramatics and magic so we get Timeless, Emma falls in love, and Foolish One, even Castles Crumbling. And 1989 is a nihilistic acceptance of the burdens of fame and how it ruins a normal relationship so we get "suburban legends" and "now that we don't talk".

The songs fit so well thematically into each album to the extent that I can actually kind of see where in the album the song would go. And maybe Taylor truly is the mastermind and she's writing all these songs on the fly but honestly that would be more impressive. I can also honestly see why some were left off. Most of them, I think, were taken off the album at the original time because they would've been damaging to her relationships. I mean imagine "Forever Winter" dropping at the wrong time and having that person hear their mental health struggle become news? Imagine Suburban Legends dropping while Harry Styles fans still hated Taylor. Imagine Mr. Perfectly fine dropping after her break up with Joe? I think Taylor wanted to be kind and not bring those aspects of her life any more into the public than it already was. And even songs that wouldn't have done much were just repetitive. On 1989 I think I see that the most. You don't need "new romantics" and "Suburban Legends" You don't need "wildest dreams" and "slut" they both tell the samr story. Don't get me wrong I love them all, I just see the creative choices in leaving them off.

Anyway that's why I think the vault tracks are genuinely from the vault and not some scheme from Taylor to, idk, get people to be more interested in the most anticipated rereleases of all time. It doesn't make sense.

#taylor swift #1989 tv

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pearljen-blog · 1 year

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Renovations with Joel Miller - 01

Chapter 01 - Introductions

You meet Joel by accident and find out he’s working in constructions. Hopefully with some convincing he can assist you with some urgent house renovations... and then some.

Based on the video game version of Joel, but can be changed to the HBO version if preferred. Taking place pre outbreak in Austin Texas.

Masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x afab reader

Warnings: This is my first published story, which in itself should be a warning / Reader is afab and has long hair, I will try avoid using any additional physical descriptions / Not familiar with the area of Austin, so most of it is badly googled or made up / swearing / smut eventually

Rriiiiing

‘Hello’. It was 2 in the morning. Who would be calling at this time?

‘Hey! Hun! It’s me.’

Of course.

‘I am so sorry, really sorry. I met this guy…. we were at that new place in town, Butlers.. something, in Austin. It was CRAZY.’

Who’s that chuckling in the back? Where is she? Drunk?

‘Crazy I tell ya. Anyway, we’re kind of … We’re in jail. He got in a fight. It wasn’t anything bad. Just.. he kinda hit that guy and he went down. Some idiot anyway. And he was doing it for me. That fella was just talking shit.’

‘What? Where are you?’ I love you Carla but I swear..

‘It’s nothing bad. I promise. Seriously. They took us in and we had to go to Travis County Jail. We’re there now. Just waiting.’

‘It’s 2 in the fucking morning…’

‘I know! Fuck.. I know! But we don’t want to stay here all weekend.’

‘Who is we?’

‘Tommy, he’s the guy from the fight. He didn’t start it. Fuck I’m sorry, but I don’t know who else to call. I can’t call dad. He’ll kill me’.

‘I’m an hour out of the city. What do you want me to do?’ God I’m tired.

‘PLEASE! I’ll pay you back. Just let us get out of here. I’m begging ya.’

My head hurts. My eyes are sore. ‘How much is to get you out?’

‘Fuck I don’t know. But I’ll give it back to ya. Promise.’

You turn on the lights next to the bed. Hating the idea of spending an hour in the car, driving through the fucking city and then her drunk ass home.

‘I hate you. You’re a terrible friend.’

‘Please Y/N!’

‘Yeah I’m moving. But it will take me about 90 minutes to be there.’

‘Thanks babes. Thanks thanks’

You hang up. Out of pleasantries for this time of the night. Once in the bathroom you put your hair in a ponytail and fresh water to your face. You love Carla, but she’s a mess sometimes. Like a real mess. But she’s also the first person you have been able to click with since you arrived in Austin. She doesn’t ask too many questions, mainly happy to talk about herself. And she gets you out of the house. At least some nights.

The drive to Austin is fine. Boring, especially at this time of the night. You made some coffee for the road and listen to Booker T & the MG’s. One of your dads’ favourite albums. You always doze off to some long-forgotten time, when listening to it. Time passes much faster this way. You were hitting Austin fast and prepared yourself to be lost until you found Travis County Jail. Driving in the city didn’t scare you but drained a lot more energy from you.

***

‘We can’t release anyone today. You will have to come back tomorrow.’

‘He is right there for fuck’s sake!’

‘SIR!’

‘He’s right there! Just let me pay and get him out. Do your job!’

‘SIR! That’s enough! I am asking you to leave.’

Two men around the desk standing close and arguing. What the hell did you walk into at this time of the night?

‘I just want my brother out is all. Why are you being so difficult?’

‘You can come back tomorrow to collect your brother. Please leave, get out, before I will arrest you as well for disorderly conduct.’

One guy is storming off. Head bowed to the ground, nevertheless you could see the anger on him. His posture rigid and ready to crack any second. He sprints past you and for a second you feel intimidated to walk any further to the reception. What a night this turns out to be.

‘Fun night?’

‘What can I do for you love?’

‘My friend got into a little trouble last night and called me to release her. Her name is Carla Thomas, age 34.’ What other information do they need you wonder.

‘Well, I’ll tell you what I told the last guy. You will have to come back tomorrow. We are not releasing anyone today.’

‘What??’ You are joking?

‘Come back on Monday from 9am love.’ There is an uninterested look that comes with his statement.

‘I just drove over an hour to pick her up.’

‘I’m sorry to hear. But there are no weekend releases. Please come back on Monday.’

You realize there’s no way to discuss or argue your way out of this, but you try anyway.

After some back and forth you cave and walke back outside. What a night indeed.

Carla will have to wait. She will have to understand. Maybe you can just stay in Austin and get breakfast somewhere. Or maybe you’ll be able to fall back asleep when you get home. How will you pick her up on Monday? You have work. There are about 15 thoughts currently in your head. But you are unable to focus on any one of them, so you just slowly walk back to your car.

On the way to your car, you spot the guy who was arguing to get his brother released. More out of your peripheral, but you see him. He’s standing by his truck, not far from you. On the phone, or desperately trying to ring someone. Possibly his brother you think.

‘Fuck sake!’

You look towards his direction.

‘Fun night?’ Yes, your one and only ice breaker, you think to yourself.

‘It’s fucking bullshit.’ He looks up and straight at you. ‘Sorry, I didn’t mean that.’

Southern gentlemen.

‘It’s ok. Same thing I said to myself... in my head.’

He turns slightly towards his truck. Frown all over his face. You smirk, hands slightly fidgeting.

‘You know they have people around. I just don’t understand why they just can’t release people on a fucking Sunday. Tommy, my brother,… he could have told me when he called.’

Tommy, well..

‘Your brother’s name is Tommy?’ You huff and smile to yourself. ‘That’s.. funny. My friend called me tonight at 2am, telling me she got arrested with a guy named Tommy. Or arrested because of him.'

You look at the ground now. Still turned towards him.

‘He’s a mess but a good guy.’

You look up. ‘Oh yeah, sorry I didn’t mean it that way.’

He’s looking right at you now. Just a grey worn out shirt and a tired look, but he looks gorgeous. God, you wish you would be able to keep eye contact.

‘Well, I guess I may see you on Monday then to get these kids home.’ Your gaze drops back to the ground, and you slowly turn towards your car.

‘Yeah, can’t wait to give up half a day of work to drive around the city just to get him out. Only getting paid for the days I’m working for fucks sake. He should know better.’

You look back at him just to acknowledge that you are listening. But you don’t say anything.

‘Sorry I don’t expect you to feel sorry for me missing a day of construction.’

‘You work in construction?’ Your eyes go wide, and you look at him expecting.

He stays silent for a second. Seems it’s not the usual reaction he gets, when mentioning constructions.

‘I’m a carpenter. But we, Tommy and I, we do whatever works needs to be done really.’

‘Are you looking for work?’ Maybe too forward. ‘Or do you know any construction friends that are looking for work?’

There’s an awkward silence. No longer angry, he’s just looking at you wondering. Possibly trying to figure out where he wants this conversation to go. You can’t keep your gaze up and turn back at the car. He’s still gorgeous. For a second you start playing with your lower lip.

‘Always looking for work.’ You turn back at him. Eyebrows raised slightly, heart beating heavier now.

‘I bought a house recently,…well a few months ago now actually. Ehm.. It’s a really great house! Spectacular! But it needs some work done. I think the walls are fine. At least my brother thinks so. He’s been looking at it for now, and I trust him. But the roof needs work, and pretty much all the windows need to be replaced. Bathroom and kitchen, all needs to be re-done, but that’s second to getting the house in actual good shape.’

Oh my god, why don’t you just tell him your whole life story? Jesus…

‘How urgent is it?’

Is he considering it?

‘I’m already living in it. But my brother is pushing me to get it done. He’s been helping me a lot, but he doesn’t live around here, so it’s been moving really slowly.’

‘Can go and take a look. Get and understanding of what we are dealing with here. How much you paying?’

‘Oh.’ Your brother warned you about this question.

‘Honestly you would have to talk this out with my brother. He said around $30 per hour. But it depends what extra charges come on top. Like fuel and that kind of stuff. So I don’t know for sure. Oh, I should mention, the house is not actually in Austin.’

Here we go, the deal breaker.

‘It’s in Luling. About an hour on a good day.’

‘Yeah, I know that place. I grew up there’ He’s smiling. Wow.

‘Wow… Please tell me you have font memories of your childhood.’

‘Some of them. Place was great though.’

You’re thinking to yourself. Just ask him.

‘I can take your number. Or give you mine. Or whichever way this usually works.’ Breath in ‘You know, in case you want to have a look at the house.’

He keeps looking at you with no mercy now.

‘Yeah lets swap numbers and give me a call. I’m not sure what time I’ll be here on Monday.’

You swap numbers and walk back to your car. Goodbyes are short but you need a second to collect your thoughts in the car anyway. You found out his name is Joel Miller. He was looking for an excuse to visit Luling again, so he told you. Maybe Carla’s drunk ass could be good for something. You’re getting breakfast for the road.

Masterlist // Next Chapter

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #the last of us #tlou #joel miller smut #Renovations with Joel Miller

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lostfracturess · 2 days

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nici bae i've had to put this chapter off for too long bc i was in an angst hiatus LOL but it's time. it's TIIIIIMEEE im so scared n nervous omg BUT IM SO READY AT THE SAME TIMESKSKRLSF btw hope ur vacay is going good <33

Meaningless when they couldn't be spoken to her, couldn't reach her, couldn't make her understand, couldn't heal the wound I'd carved into her heart.

STOPPPP im alr deceased omg. i love this sort of soliloquy at the beginning here it's so reflective of his state of mind

Each word a drop of poison forced down my throat. A self-inflicted wound, a desperate mutilation of the only thing that had ever felt real.

literally gonna claw my eyeballs out their sockets YOUR WRITING IS TOO GOOD AND THIS IS SO DEVASTATING

A familiar craving stirred my senses, the desperate need for the numbing escape that would mean failing her even more. My fingers clawed at my forearm, trying to replace the hollowness with physical pain. It wasn't enough.

the descriptions of his addiction are always so reeling it's like the reader can feel it too it's so scary but so immersive

Did you really think I wouldn't keep a backup?

IM SIICCKKKK OMG HIS BREAKDOWN IN HIS OFFICE IS SO INTENSE DR GOJO PLS. omg YES punch the fuck outta sukuna. ALSO IM LISTENING TO LOML BY TAYLOR SWIFT OFF HER NEW ALBUM TTPD AND IT'S OMGGG IT'S 100% S&C COUPLE PLS IM GONNA SOB

sighh gojo being unsure of his feelings for reader, idk i think sukuna is 100% gaslighting him. but gojo second guessing his OWN intentions has me so nervous rn too like "drag her down w me, see her drown"

UGHHH THE TECH MALFUNCTION THING sukuna better sleep with both eyes open tn. he craves problems im sure he wont mind the one where my fist is going into his face

oh my god honeslty like he needs to go to rehab. nothing else is gonna work for him atp. he needs PROFESSIONAL HELP.

She were out there, her life forever marked by my choices, while I was — here. Hiding in a haze of pills and smoke.

ughhh i love this line SOBS forever marked by my choices sent a chill down my spine

STOPPPP SATORU PLS YOUR LIVER'S GONNA GIVE OUTT

There was raw, unadulterated terror etched in her eyes. But I was right. She looked as beautiful as ever. Even with those terror-stricken eyes she was breathtaking.

UGHHH IM LOSING MY MIND i love how she's still looking out for him despite everything but seriously i cannot IMAGINE how terrified she must feel rn seeing him like that

STOPP MY EYES HAVE BEEN GLUED TO MY SCREEN BUT SHE SAID I LOVE YOU AHHHHH

More lies for a heart that deserved nothing but the truth. So I swallowed down the love threatening to spill from my lips.

im literally tearing up n ive got fullbody chills

ok i ve gott a eat dinnner but i'mma send this ask rn cuz i don't wanna accidentally lose it n then pt2

elliee !! yes my vocation was great !! <3

also so so happy to hear you liked the whole inner monologue thingy going on in this chapter. i spend a unholy amount of time writing and editing this over and over again and am really happy with the outcome, so i'm so glad you like it too !! 😭😭

yes he is !! sukuna really knows how to get under his skin, it's so so frustrating. but also makes him a good villain for the story hehe.

STOPPPP SATORU PLS YOUR LIVER'S GONNA GIVE OUTT

don't worry, i'm already on the waiting list for his liver transplant, he won't die 😂😂

UGHHH IM LOSING MY MIND i love how she's still looking out for him despite everything but seriously i cannot IMAGINE how terrified she must feel rn seeing him like that

yes yes yes !! i love how they will both hurt each other again and again but never stop caring for each other. i'm sick in the head, i love this so much 💔😭

so happy to hear you had chills while reading hehe (especially coming form a fellow writer) !! <3

#inbox

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monstersliveinthemirror · 8 months

Text

The Guts Write up Nobody asked for

1. Out the gate with beautiful vocals in All American Bitch. The acoustic intro is interesting and catchy, but when it hits with drums and electric guitar, the song picks up so much. I love her almost punk sound in the chorus, especially the second chorus. This one definitely hits pop rock and it's incredible. The drop to the acoustic at the end is -chefs kiss-.

2. Bad idea right? Is THAT bitch. The sound is incredible, but let's talk lyrics. "My brain goes Ahhhh" is such a mood when you think about that ex you aren't over. "Yes I know that he's my ex but can't two people reconnect I only see him as a friend biggest lie I ever said" This whole track is just a love song to making bad decisions around exes. Let me just say it brings back every single time Alex showed back up in my life and we would be "friends" until the whole line of "I just tripped and fell into his bed..." SONICALLY this song is interesting and upbeat, it's just so good.

3. I don't really have much new to say about Vampire- what a beautiful song about a fucked up time in her life. I love the interesting music and changes in the song. It's catchy, it's just good. It's been good since it came out.

4. Let's talk about the bisexual anthem lacy. It's yet another song for the girlies who don't understand the difference between jealousy and attraction AKA me in high school. The lyrics in this one are silly to me, I think describing skin as puff pastry is so ridiculous, but it's such a vibe for being a teenager and thinking someone is perfect and being jealous. "I despise my rotton mind and how much it worships you" IS NOT A STRAIGHT THING.

5. This one immediately starts off gritty and is almost whiplash following Lacy. The chorus has such a neat and interesting sound and I'm so glad she took a risk with the punk leaning sound for this album. This is another song that makes this album the pop rock genre. I love how upbeat it is, it's a bop and a dance around your room with headphones pretending you're the lead singer of a band song. I will say I don't love the part where it slows down, but I'm glad it picks up and doesn't end with a slower part.

6. Making the bed physically hurt me. I feel personally attacked by the lyrics. I'm not sure I can talk about this. "Push away all the people who know me the best, but it's me who's making the bed. I'm so tired of being the girl that I am every good thing is turning to something I dread, I'm playing the victim so well in my head, but it's me who's been making the bed." Fucking ouch okay. "I got the things I wanted it's just not what I imagined" 😭 it's a perfect mid album song, slowing it down for a minute after lots of energy.

7. I don't have words for logical. Love song to the girls who have been in toxic relationships with men who take advantage of the ones who fall hard. This is an Alex song and I hate it but "you've got me thinking two plus two equals five and I'm the love of your life" I mean come on the WAY people convince you of lies. "Why do I do this, I look so stupid" is the moment of realizing that you were hoodwinked but somehow you still feel for them even though you know better. The whole outro of blaming yourself is just heartbreaking and I am unwell right now okay.

8. Alright back to it with some drums and gritty sound. This one has a great vibe. The chorus is everything to me. Upbeat I hate this man I'm gonna fuck up his life, the break up song for us girlies who knows we aren't gonna get closure but like we're ready to take it. The whole vibe of I want to make him hurt....but with the confusing aspect of wanting to make him feel better by being the one he turns to...nope I want revenge except I want him back FUCK. The perfect song for that confusing part of the break up where you're almost ready to move on but not really.

9. Love is embarrassing is a mood lol. The dumb shit we do when we think we're in love, the way we don't really have boundaries or know what we'll put up with yet. I appreciate the sound and how catchy the song is. I also love the pretty abrupt ending.

10. Alright, slow it back down. We've got the signature acoustic and Olivia's beautiful voice for this one. It seems like it's going to crescendo, but it doesn't quite get there. Lyrically, "I fantasize about a time you're a little fucking sorry" got me. "How could anybody do the things you did so easily" I am unwell. This song made me emotional about a fucking break up that happened almost a year ago. Fuck this. I am hurt. ~you know I can't let it go, I've tried I've tried I've tried for so long~ and it just ending...ugh so good.

11. Pretty isn't pretty starts strong. The sound is good, the lyrics are honest. It just addresses growing up a girl and developing self worth issues and is probably one of my favorite songs here because of the topic. We drop from worrying about relationships and just address what it's like when it feels like nothing is ever good enough. It's not my favorite based on sound, but it's good enough.

12. Ending on a sad note, I see. This one is a coming of age song and not understanding there is so much good ahead. You're just nineteen babe you've got so many better days to come. But at twenty eight I felt this. It's saying goodbye to younger days, "they all say that it gets better, it gets better but what if I don't" screams mental illness to me but I'm probably projecting my own issues. God I love how it picks up because it's such a big feeling. She did a great job of using music to set the mood in this one. Also the outro, the baby sounds the mom sounds just God fucking damn.

#guts #Olivia Rodrigo #personal #don't come for me having opinions

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x--daughters-of-darkness--x · 1 year

Text

Tarja Turunen on Nightwish, celebrity fans and overcoming health issues: “My stroke was caused by stress”

An audience with the original queen of symphonic metal

You’ve said before that Nightwish’s music was meant to be downbeat and acoustic, but your voice pushed them into a more metal direction. Would you have been miserable if they had remained a folk band?

“That’s difficult because, at that time, I really wanted to be an operatic singer and that was the only voice I had. I wasn’t able to do much with it beyond full-on power, so it didn’t fit nicely with the acoustic music we started with.”

You were one of the first female lead singers in that more symphonic end of power metal. Who’s the most famous person that’s come up to you and called you an influence?

“Simone Simons [lead singer of Epica]. She was just like, [starts bowing]. Ha ha ha! It’s funny, I’ve just come home from a tour and one of the girls in one of the support bands was singing backstage. My musicians turned to me and said, ‘This is completely your fault, Tarja.’ Ha ha!”

This year marks 25 years since the first Nightwish album, Angels Fall First. What do you think of that album now?

“I am looking at the gold record hanging on the wall right now. It was kind of a second demo for us. When we were making it, we had no idea that it would become a complete album or bring us a record deal. It was very exciting. We were so young that, when I listen to myself, it’s unbearable. Ha ha ha! But, hey, everybody needs to start somewhere.”

Nightwish fired you using an open letter that was publicly shared. What’s your relationship with them 17 years later?

“The only guy that I had contact with was Marko [Hietala, bass], but he’s no longer in the band. I even sang with him some years ago. The rest, it’s been emailing. Everything is fine but we’re not in touch. That all died a long time ago. I wrote Tuomas [Holopainen, Nightwish band leader] a message when his father passed, so we’re fine.”

Do you want more of a relationship with them, or are you happy with how things are?

“I’m happy. I don’t have any regrets. I hope they’re happy.”

You’re releasing a new retrospective of your solo career called Living The Dream. Why is now the time for a best-of album?

“It took catastrophically long to come up with this record because we had the Covid pandemic; I’m still doing those tours that have been postponed since 2020. I feel like this is a good time because In The Raw, my last album, was my most personal. It came from the shock of my stroke [in 2018] and the struggles with my health. Now, I can release this and start again. It can be the platform for a new album and new start.”

How are you feeling nowadays?

“I’m very good, thank you. Probably in a better condition than ever, physically. The stroke was caused by stress. I’m an artist, not the boss, so when my husband [who’s also Tarja’s manager] stayed home [and I went on tour], I needed to handle things I was not ready to face. When there was a problem, people came to me.”

Why did he stay home?

“Our daughter had been touring with me since she was a baby and, when she turned four, we wanted her to go to school. I had to leave [to go on tour] and closing that door was a bitch. That was the hardest thing to do.”

How did you recover?

“I got a mentor. I had talks with a very old Argentinian man that were a sort of therapy. He just made me realise that I need positive people around me, so that my artistic wings can spread wide open and I can be happy.”

What can you tell us about that new album you mentioned?

“I’m currently writing songs for it, but I can already say to you that it’s pretty heavy. It’s because of my live band. They are absolutely amazing musicians and, when they play, it’s a massive support for me and my big voice. They lift me up with their energy, so this is going to be really powerful, with metal guitars and grooving bass and drums.”

#Tarja Turunen #2023 interviews

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bisluthq · 2 years

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On the topic of Taylor being "hot" it is of course very subjective as you pointed out. Being physically attractive has its obvious advantages but it can also get in the way.

Anyone with eyes can see that Taylor is very attractive. She is tall, has a great figure, great hair and she is conventionally pretty. Okay she walks like a pigeon and dances like she is getting electric shocks but you can't have everything.

When you listen to what she has said about navigating the music industry those advantages are also a curse. She was under huge pressure to be sexualised and at 16 there was a bit of that going on although (apparently) Andrea stopped most of that nonsense.

Also something a casual fan misses is that Taylor is very, very smart. Her lyrics are literary and eloquent and her business sense is second to none - including the likes of Borchetta and Braun who I am so glad she is roasting on a spit. The fact she is a blond bombshell and smart has led her to be underestimated and gaslit in the same way Marilyn Monroe was. Fortunately unlike Marilyn it looks like Taylor has not allowed it to destroy her, she is thriving long after most female artists are burnt out.

Occasionally Taylor goes for a sexy look but I am not sure she really commits to it and it shows. I am not sure whether I am in a minority but I find her personality, empathy and emotional intelligence way more attractive than anything else although I am well aware that we do not REALLY know her.

I am a fan of Taylor as an artist rather than a media celebrity which is why I am glad she does not pander to that shit any more. Its a waste of her time. Having said that I do like to know what she is up to particularly as I am now very ready for a new album era and a tour.

Agree!

#nat talks tay’s marketing #nat talks… taylor thirst

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harrisonarchive · 2 years

Photo

George and Olivia in 1976 and 1996; photos by Brad Elterman and Richard Young.

On this day, September 2, in 1978, George and Olivia were married.

“[Olivia] is very sweet and she gives me all the peace I need.” - George Harrison, Siete Días Illustrados, February 21, 1979

#George Harrison #Olivia Harrison #quote #quotes about George #quotes by George #George and Olivia #1970s #1990s #2000s #Harrison spirituality #fits queue like a glove

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primordialsoundmeditation · 15 days

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This week’s astrology forecast: April 15th to 21st

David Pond in Reno May 17th - 22nd

For a talk and Astrology consultations

I will be in Reno next month, giving a talk at Lorna Benedict's healing studio and I will be available for astrology readings while I am in town.

Upcoming Astrology Cycles: 2024 and Beyond

Saturday, May 18th 6:00 - 7:30 $20

626 Humbolt Street, Reno

Call Lorna at 775-322-7438 for reservations

Consultations. If you would like to schedule an astrology reading, call Laurie at 360-918-8411, or email her at [email protected] and she will help you make the arrangements.

Hope to see you soon!

Message for the week:

The much-anticipated Jupiter/Uranus conjunction in Taurus occurs this weekend, opening the door for adventures, getting off the beaten path, exploration, and unexpected opportunities. This conjunction occurs every 14 years, and historically, has shown to be a time of major new beginnings and breakthroughs—in the arts, sciences, technology and lifestyles:

Music, Bob Dylan, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Elvis, Bo Diddley, Buddy Holly, Chuck Berry, Miles Davis, Louis Armstrong, Billie Holiday, and Joni Mitchel all launched their first albums during a Jupiter/Uranus conjunction.

Film: Charlie Chaplin’s “Charlie”, first talkies, Monty Python, Spielberg, Scorsese, Polanski, Paul Newman, and Woody Allen all launched their first movies. Notable films: Easy Rider and Alice’s Restaurant exemplified the spirit of this conjunction.

Technology firsts: telegraph, light bulb radio broadcast, TV transmission, internet, computer, quantum physics. space flight, wright brothers, and the Moon landing

Literature: Shakespeare, Milton (Paradise Lost), Dostoevsky, Melville, Dickens, Mark Twain, Henry James, Jane Austin, , William Blake, Emily Dickenson, and Alan Ginsberg all published their first writings, again, during Jupiter/Uranus conjunctions.

Cultural: Woodstock as well as 16 other mass music festivals.

This is a wave you will want to catch—if you are ready to launch something, this is the ideal time. In general, this transit is so positive in its potential, the only downside might be not taking advantage of an unexpected opportunity that presents itself. The heads up this week is to stay open to new experiences and unexpected opportunities.

Mercury (the mind), Venus (values) and Chiron (the wounded healer) are all conjunct this week in Aries—a good time to draw on the strength of courage for moving forward, and perhaps bolster others who may lack courage.

Monday: Mercury is conjunct Chiron—you may be called on to motivate a co-worker, friend, or family member to move forward with confidence. The Moon is in Cancer square to the Sun in Aries, while also being in a flowing trine to Neptune. You may experience some push-pull within yourself as to whether to be cautious or bold, with the Aries/Cancer square—draw on faith (Neptune) to proceed. The Moon will be moving into high-spirited Leo this evening.

Tuesday: Let your light shine today with the Moon in big-hearted Leo with no aspects. “Put a little love in your heart”, are great lyrics to carry as a mantra to take advantage of this unimpeded Leo energy.

Wednesday: This is a good day to unleash your inner rebel and push yourself to be more innovative and to reach for the stars, with the Moon in confident, creative Leo and motivated by the Jupiter/Uranus conjunction. The Moon in a supportive trine the Mercury/Chiron conjunction will facilitate communication and persuasiveness.

Thursday: This is a good day for spring cleaning with the Moon entering fastidious Virgo this morning. This is excellent for tackling some of the “to do” list, getting rid of clutter and old stuff, and generally getting your life to run more efficiently.

Friday: The Sun enters quality-seeking Taurus this morning, initiating a month of enhancing security and the quality of your life. A little bit of luck is in the air with Mars sextile to the fortunate Jupiter/Uranus conjunction—act on unexpected opportunities. The Moon is in task-oriented Virgo, and you may feel pressure to get everything done before the weekend with an opposition to pressure laden Saturn this afternoon—Breathe!

Saturday: A potent day in the heavens with much going on. The much-anticipated Jupiter/Uranus conjunction occurs today—stay open to unexpected opportunities and stretch your wings to catch hold of the updraft. The Moon is in conscientious, detail-minded Virgo in a harmonious trine to this conjunction—see the big picture but focus on the next step. There may be some confusion this afternoon during the opposition to the Mars/Neptune conjunction, however a peaceful and harmonious evening unfolds with the Moon entering harmony seeking Libra.

Sunday: You may have to work at keeping the peace today, or avoid manipulative people, with the Sun square to manipulative Pluto and the Moon in fair-minded Libra. Libra, the sign of the scales of balance seeks win-win involvements with others—this is a day to consider to compromise is a failed win-win. If it doesn’t feel fair, don’t do it.

May the stars be with you!

David

Donations: Although these weekly updates are free, if you would like to support the newsletter with a donation, go to my website and click the “Donate” button on the menu. You can donate in increments of $5. You can also donate through Venmo: David-Pond-17 If you would like to send a check, contact us for our mailing address. Thanks for your support!

Consultations: I am available for consultations if you would like to see how your astrology chart can help you connect with your true self, explore your life’s purpose, better understand relationships, find your right vocation, or to align with current astrological influences. Contact us by email, phone, or through the “Services” tab on our website, to set up a session.

Email: [email protected]

Website: Davidpond.com

Phone: 360-918-8411

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alegendoftomorrow · 2 months

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Snowed in Grief

Summary: Not all wounds can be seen, and sometimes it takes being trapped in a childhood cabin to open those sores and let them be healed.

Characters: Natasha Trace and sister!reader. First person, no use of name other then “little sister”. No physical descriptions of reader

Word Count: 1659

Warnings: Mentions of grief and death of a family member. Mentions of being hungover/alcohol consumption to cope. Some cursing

A/N: This is my second entry into @sailor-aviator winter challenger. My prompt was snowed in and I wanted to take this one in a little bit of a different direction. I know for so many of us the holidays can be a time of grief and loneliness rather than the joy they are for others. For anyone who thinks they are alone in this, I want you to know that you’re not. I’m here and I understand. You don’t have to struggle alone; you don’t have to be alone. Reach out to those around you and if you have no one to support you then know that I am here and always willing to listen or just be there for you. I’m happy to sit with you in the dark until you’re ready to stand up again. Always.

The wind howled against the window panes and rattled the walls of the house. Sending a chill straight up my spine despite the warmth radiating from the crackling fire. My eyes watched the wood shift as the flames continued to eat away at them. Turning the solid structures to blackened ash and smoke that floated up the chimney. With another long sigh I curled up tighter into the side of the ancient couch. Pulling up the grey throw blanket Natasha must have laid over me last night when I fell asleep over my shoulders. Everything hurts but especially my head, which pounds in a rhythm that’s out of tune with the shuddering windows.

“Ah she wakes,” Nat’s voice cuts through my foggy thoughts and I shift only enough so I can see her leaning against the doorway that leads into the kitchen. Her usually perfectly hair is loose about her shoulders and fluffier from where she’s run her fingers through it. A mug with the words World’s Best Sister is steaming in her hands. “How are you feeling?”

I ignore her question and turn back to the fire. Shifting enough I’m sitting up with my knees against my chest and my arms wrapped around them. “You know it’s a week past Christmas right,” I say instead.

I can’t see her expression but I’m sure she looks down at her very bright red, fluffy pajama pants that have Merry Christmas written in white letters all over them. She laughs and I hear her walk over and sit down on the other end of the couch with a sigh.

“It’s not the New Year yet so I can still celebrate,” she says with a self-satisfied tone that almost pulls a smile to my lips. “Isn’t that what mom always says?”

“Said,” I correct. A habit now. A correction I can’t stop myself from making. Like it’s an impulse I have no control over. “It’s what mom always said.”

Silence falls between us as the wind picks up again. Only this time it’s muted slightly by the snow that’s drifted up to the edge of the windows. Covering the back porch and no doubt nearly burying Nat’s car that she used to drive all the way out here to find me in our family’s cabin. The one mom left me in the will Nat had been executive of four months ago. The cabin we had played in as little girls. Our heights still carved on the door and our artwork still stuck to the fridge. Nat’s little grey jets zooming through a crayon blue colored sky and my rows of flowers in every different color. All of it untouched. All of it the same as the last time we had been up here. Except for the now empty liquor cabinet and the pile of photo albums sitting unopened on the coffee table in front of us.

“Right,” Nat finally breaks the silence. “You know she’d hate the fact you didn’t decorate this place.”

“She’d hate a lot more things about me then just that,” I shoot back. My eyes starting to blur with tears as I set my lips in a hard line to keep the sob out of my mouth.

Nat sighs again and I hear her set her mug down on something.

“No, she wouldn’t. She’d be upset that you were hiding here by yourself instead of with your family but—”

“I’m not hiding!” I snap. I wince at how childlike it sounds. Setting my jaw and turning my body suddenly to face Nat who’s sitting up straight and proper on her side of the couch. The perfect little soldier.

It’s not fair but I seethe anyway. I didn’t tell anyone where I was going specifically so this wouldn’t happen. I wanted to be alone. I deserved to be alone. Nat had always been better about…. well, everything. Always the first, always the champion, always the pride and joy of our family. The All-American Softball star with a full ride and a shot at the pros who’d given up that dream for a career as a Naval Aviator. Valedictorian and prom queen. The oldest child with medals and trophies proudly displayed on the walls of our parents’ homes. Then there was me. The wild child, the rebel, the girl with her nose stuck in everything but a book. I was Nat’s opposite in nearly every way. Well, almost every way.

“You have no idea what it’s been like for me for this past year. You weren’t here! I was the one who stayed, who took care of everything, who made sure everyone knew what was happening with mom. I made sure she took her pills and I was the one who stayed up for days on end when she got so bad, she’d stop breathing! I gave up my whole life to come and take care of her and I never once asked you, or anyone else for help!”

My voice is laced with grief and it shakes despite my best efforts not to let it. Tears, hot and burning trace down my cheek as I swallow back the burning remnants of alcohol that try and climb their way back up.

“That’s not fair! I would have—”

“I know you would have! Because you’re perfect right? Because you can always o everything right and poor little me can’t handle anything?” The words are out of my mouth before I can really think about them and it’s only when Nat looks at me like I’ve slapped her do I regret them.

I look away and bury my face into my knees as I start to sob again. Whatever pain last night’s bender had numbed now coming back full force. Anger and grief knot my stomach and choke off my sobs as I only half gasp for breath. Wishing instead that I too would stop breathing. Maybe then it wouldn’t hurt so much. Maybe then I could stop hurting people.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it I—I… I just wanted to prove to them, to—to you that I wasn’t a failure. That I could do one thing right. That I could take care of mom and she’d--… she’d…” My muffled words fade out. Choked off by another cry that tightens my throat. I feel the couch shift and then Nat’s arms are around me. Strong and sure as they always have been, she squeezes me close and without thinking I curl into her. A child seeking the comfort that she’d denied herself.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. I’m sorry too. I’m so sorry little sister. It was never your job to take care of her alone. You never had to prove anything to anyone. Least of all me. I’m sorry I ever made you feel like you had to,” her voice breaks as she squishes the last words out.

I close my eyes and move my arms to wrap around Nat’s body. Shifting until my knees are laid over her thighs and I’m practically in her lap. She’s crying too. I can feel the tears soaking my hair as her hands grip into my sweatshirt. Her body curling around mine too.

“I’m sorry you ever thought yourself less then. You are a wonderful, and amazing, and talented young woman. I wish you could see that about yourself. I wish you could see the woman I see when I look at you. The woman mom saw. Even if you are a major pain in the ass most of the time.” We both half laugh at that as I sniffle against her chest.

“Above all that though you are my sister. You will always be my sister first and I’m sorry if I made you feel abandoned, or alone but I’m here now and we can get through this together. Okay?” Her question is a plea that pierces my heart and for one second, we are eight and five years old again. Hiding in a blanket fort with our stuffed bears and a flashlight, promising to be sisters forever. Promising never to leave each other’s sides. Promising to have each other’s backs always.

“Okay,” I whisper. Pulling away and wiping my eyes with the back of my sleeve. “Okay.”

Nat smiles through her own tears and wipes at my face. Gently tucking the fly aways off my forehead and wiping the last of my tears as I sniffle again and lean back down into her shoulder.

“Okay then,” she says. Clearing her throat and snuggling me closer beside her. “Then first after this snow clears up and we can actually get out of here, we’re going to go home and you are going to come out to San Diego with me. My apartment is big enough for the both of us and we’re going to be stationed there for a while still.”

“I don’t know if that’s such—” I start.

“This wasn’t up for debate,” Nat interrupts. “I miss my sister and you can’t stay here alone. Mom would want us to be together. To help each other get through this. We’ll take it one day at a time. Maybe we can both start over there. A fresh page, a new chapter for the Trace sisters.”

I nod. For the first time in a while, I can see a tiny glimmer of hope floating somewhere far ahead of me. San Diego sounds like a good place to start over. It’s not a cure and it won’t fix everything, but maybe, just maybe it can be the start of something. Maybe all of this grief doesn’t have to be the end of everything.

“Okay.” Is all I say for now.

Outside the wind silences itself against the fluffy banks of snow, which now feel less like a prison and more like a safety blanket. Waiting to be pulled away to reveal something beautiful underneath. Like a row of multicolored flowers.

#Liz’s Christmas challenge #writing challenge #top gun fic #top gun fanfiction #natasha trace #natasha phoenix trace #christmas #snowed in #grieving #unhealthy coping mechanisms #new start #snowed in grief #top gun maverick

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