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shatteredhourglass · 2 years

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Winterhawk Bingo Round 3 - Masterpost - shatteredhourglass

we did it, lads! check under the readmore for the full list of fics (and links) or the series on ao3 - and make sure you check out @winterhawkbingo for the other great creations brought on by this event. thank you mods for another great whb season!

B1 (Slutty Clint) - touch, touch, touch Summary: Turns out single-bed motel rooms on missions aren't always conducive to getting laid, as much as Clint's trying to make it that way. (E Rating, 2,544 Words)

I1 (Little Dick Bucky Barnes) - mouth where your money is Summary: Clint keeps thinking about it. And then he thinks about it some more. (E Rating, 1,685 Words)

N1 (DC Comics AU) - The Joke(’s on You) Summary: The Harlequin is a clown-faced criminal, a merciless mercenary, and the most favoured pet of Joker. He causes misfortune and mayhem for all those that come close enough to see his terrible grin, and leads a successful life of crime with the equally infamous Poison Ivy at his side. Peace, happiness, diamonds - nothing is safe from those black and red gloves. There is no Clint Barton. There is no James 'Bucky' Barnes. ...or is there? (E Rating, 5,354 Words)

G1 (Gradually Moving in Together) - the mirror and the lights and the smoke clear Summary: “A kid just took a picture with me,” Clint says. “On purpose.” “Sounds like you need some sushi,” Bucky offers. (T+ Rating, 2,967 Words)

O1 (Senior Citizen Discount) - Entertainment’s Free Summary: If things keep going like this, Steve's going to pluck out his eyeballs. Clint's... slightly less opposed to Bucky's sexual reawakening. (E Rating, 6,079 Words)

B2 (Metal Arm Malfunction) - BANG! Chapter 5: Then Summary: The Winter Soldier has gone missing while on mission. A special team with a set of unique abilities have been sent to retrieve him. What could possibly go wrong? (E Rating, 40,256 Words)

I2 (Kobik) - BANG! Chapter 10: Now Summary: The Winter Soldier has gone missing while on mission. A special team with a set of unique abilities have been sent to retrieve him. What could possibly go wrong? (E Rating, 40,256 Words)

N2 (Biting) - make me feel alive Summary: Bucky cringes a little, because it’s embarrassing to admit he’s still thinking about it – and because if Clint doesn’t know what he’s talking about, he’s definitely not going to be able to bring it up again without fleeing from the room. Vampire sex. What’s wrong with him? (E Rating, 3,736 Words)

G2 (Failed Mission) - Hit Me (With Your Best Shot) Summary: The Venus flytrap is a flowering plant best known for its carnivorous eating habits. It is one of nature's cleverest plants, and most have evolved to survive in situations where the soil holds little or no nutrition, so the plant makes its own food. It has one of the quickest movements ever seen in a plant in order to catch its prey, which it then dissolves and digests. Poison Ivy, or Bucky Barnes?The trapper, or the trapped? (M Rating, 4,833 Words)

O2 (Masquerade AU) - (Modern) Love Summary: One fancy party at an expensive manor, held by a very rich man for the villains of New York. One suspiciously familiar clown-themed guest. Joker is dead. Harlequin lives on. (M Rating, 5,867 Words)

B3 (Swordsman/Jacques Duquesne) - BANG! Chapter 4: Now Summary: The Winter Soldier has gone missing while on mission. A special team with a set of unique abilities have been sent to retrieve him. What could possibly go wrong? (E Rating, 40,256 Words)

I3 (Thank God We’re Alive Sex) - Upside Down Chapter 3 Summary: "I'm looking for someone named Clint," he says, fingers tightening on the note in his hand. "Think I might be in the wrong place. There’s something following me. Something – not human.” (E Rating, 15,304 Words)

N3 (Free Square) - the count that thoughts Summary: Bucky likes cheesy vampire movies. Clint likes Bucky's dick. Sam likes asking questions. (E Rating, 2,067 Words)

G3 (Summer Soldier) - Sun Kissed Summary: A romantic tale of two kazoos. (T+ Rating, 5,910 Words)

O3 (Bookworm Bucky) - Booked & Busy Summary: Clint's gotta do something to get Bucky to put his book down, right? (E Rating, 1,900 Words)

B4 (Meet Ugly) - give me your key Summary: "Your mission," Fury says, his one eye boring into Steve, "is to stay the fuck out of my hair. I don't need Captain America and his peanut gallery getting in the way of these professionals." “You want us to stay out of your hair,” Steve repeats. Bucky lets out a snicker. (E Rating, 3,940 Words)

I4 (They Fuck. That’s It.) - (You Don’t) Own Me Summary: “I got bored without you here,” Harlequin murmurs. “Why’d you have to leave?” “Eco-terrorism doesn’t happen on its own,” he responds, breath catching as teeth graze his throat ever-so-gently. “I have to go out and do things sooner or later, or I’m going to lose my reputation.” “Then lose it,” Harlequin says, lips brushing his ear. “Stay here. With me.” (E Rating, 2,487 Words)

N4 (Quickies) - all for a good time Summary: “You’re supervillains,” Steve says. “You’re killing people.” “Eh,” Bucky says, blowing a bubble with his gum and letting it pop loudly for emphasis. “Not really a downside.” (E Rating, 6,602 Words)

G4 (Prison AU) - (Where Is) My Mind? Summary: Your head will collapse, But there's nothing in it- And you'll ask yourself, Where is my mind? (M Rating, 3,743 Words)

O4 (Presumed Dead) - Just A Sucker (For Pain) Summary: “This isn’t healthy,” Sam says. “You know why I’m out here? It’s because Steve worries about you so much that he can’t stop rolling around in the bed. He talks in his sleep now because he’s stressed that you’re going to kill yourself with this shit.” “I’ll be fine,” Bucky answers. “Once I find him, I’ll sleep for a thousand years. Alright?” “Once you find him.” “That’s what I said.” (M Rating, 5,376 Words)

B5 (Threesome (+1 Of Your Choice)) - Roped In Summary: “Sex pollen is not a real thing,” Clint scoffs. (E Rating, 7,072 Words)

I5 (Black Coffee Only) - (Wine) Red Summary: Clint always comes home to Bucky, and Bucky can’t leave Clint behind. Is there still a Clint Barton left to save? (E Rating, 9,694 Words)

N5 (Ameriwinterhawk) - sinking into the deep Summary: “Aw, Steve,” Clint says, soft and a little teasing. “You’ve really got yourself in a situation now, huh?” “He likes getting himself in situations,” Bucky interjects. (E Rating, 4,820 Words)

G5 (Not Iron Fist) - Playing with Fire Summary: “Three o’clock,” Natasha says and Clint looks automatically, not registering the glint of mischief in her eyes until he’s already looking. “Why is he stripping,” Clint whispers, outraged. Bucky Barnes is standing a few meters away from them, tugging his shirt over his head. He doesn’t wax his chest during the winter months, apparently, because there’s a trail of dark hair that Clint really, really wants to get his mouth on. He’s stuck staring like an idiot as Bucky throws his shirt over the door of the firetruck, every inch of his ridiculously hot upper half on display. He can almost feel the brain cells in his head frying just from the sight. (E Rating, 5,387 Words)

O5 (Fucking Machine) - easy on me, baby Summary: “Barnes has been wearing you out at night, huh,” Sam says dryly. “Can’t keep up with that supersoldier metabolism?” (E Rating, 3,156 Words)

See you next WHB season!

#shg writes winterhawk #winterhawkbingor3 #blackout babey!#this was fun #lots of different squares to keep me enriched and all that #god works hard but whb mods work harder

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donald4spiderman · 3 years

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can you write something where the bau has a halloween party and they all dress up and spencer has had a crush on fem!reader for a while and he legit only goes to the party to see her and he gets rlly flustered (as always) when he sees her in her sexy costume but like he’s rlly nervous and maybe something happens😁

SLUTTY HALLOWEEN COSTUMES ARE MY FAV YESSS

TW: mention of sex, sub!spencer

Spencer’s developed a slight crush on one of the agents in the sex crimes division. He’s only seen her in passing; occasionally, they take the elevator together— her to the fourth floor, him to the sixth. He learns through Penelope (and a slight abuse of technological power) that her name is (Y/N) (Y/L/N), she’s twenty-nine (two years older than him), and very, very qualified to be in the bureau.

The moments he sees her are few and fleeting, but dreamy nonetheless. There’s a soft halo around her face, faint music playing in the background to accompany her beauty. She flashes him a kind, tight-lipped smile, and a wave. He can never move to wave back in time— she always comes and goes at the speed of light. Spencer supposes it’s the universe's way of torturing him— teasing him with a gorgeous woman so far out of his league.

The grip on his coffee cup almost gives out completely when he sees her, perched on a desk which happens to be his.

“I’m looking for Penelope Garcia’s office.” She states, not in the mood for mindless chatter.

Spencer points in the direction of her door, just down the hall past the elevators. She smiles and mutters a quick thank you before rushing off, manila folder in hand. He pries his eyes off of her once the door shuts behind her.

“Who’s that?” Morgan inquires, fiddling with a number two pencil.

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N),” Spencer says, “She works in sex crimes.”

He chuckles lowly, “She’s cute.”

The rate at which Spencer whips around is enough to have Morgan surrendering. “Please don’t hit on (Y/N)! I’m planning to ask her out... soon. Just let me have a shot, okay?”

“I wasn’t planning on doing anything, kid.” He reassures. “You guys look cute together.”

Spencer’s cheeks warm at the thought of the two of them hand in hand, like a couple. Once he sees (Y/N) exit Penelope’s office and the elevator close behind her, he rushes to talk to his cheerful colleague.

“Garcia!” He exclaims, slamming the door behind him.

“Hello to you too, boy genius.” She chirps, pushing the purple frames up her nose, “What’s the 411?”

“What was (Y/N) doing here?”

“Oh... (Y/N).” She raises her eyebrows teasingly. “She just wanted me to upload some sex crime stats to the bureau's online database.”

“Oh, okay.”

Penelope smiles, “By the way, I’m hosting a costume party for Halloween— this Saturday, my apartment, come dressed.”

Spencer shrugs, “Garcia... You know I don’t like parties.”

“(Y/N) will be there—”

“I’m in!”

Spencer shows up later than expected, hoping that (Y/N)’s already arrived. He’s sad to find out that she hasn’t. The rest of the team is here (minus Rossi and Hotch), along with Anderson and a few members from white-collar and surveillance.

“I’m sure she’ll be here any minute.” Penelope remakes, noticing his uneasiness. He’s dressed a Art The Clown, though much less menacing.

On cue, three firm knocks sound from the door. Penelope entrusts Spencer with her champagne, scurrying over to invite her next guest in.

“(Y/N)!” She cheers, welcoming her in with a hug. Spencer’s ears perk up. “I’m so glad you stopped by!”

(Y/N) guffaws, “Oh, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

She steps into the apartment, revealing a very sexy, dare he say slutty (in a positive way!) devil costume. The red mini dress, heels, and fishnets make the blood rush from his head down to his dick.

“Hi, Spencer.” She greets, stealing the spot near the wall next to him. He tries his best to keep his eyes from wandering over her figure; she crosses her arms, pushing up her cleavage— it almost gets him. “I’m surprised to see you here.”

His brows scrunch together, “Y-you are?”

“Yeah. Garcia said you’re not much of a party guy.”

“Oh, y-yeah. I’m not. B-But I do love Halloween.” Spencer shrugs, squeezing the glass in his hand so tightly it might shatter.

“I can tell.” She laughs. “Terrifier. I love those movies.”

“Me too!” He blurts. He wants the ground to swallow him while, but she seems to find his antics endearing.

(Y/N) sighs, “I went with a basic costume this year.” She waves her hand towards the devil horns. “Figured I didn’t have enough time to replicate anything from Hereditary.”

Spencer choses his next words carefully, “W-well, you l-look amazing.”

“Thanks, Spencer.” Her hands fidget to release some of her anxieties. “You look... awesome.”

“T-thanks.”

Neither of them know what to say next. Spencer’s pretending that he can’t see Penelope spying on them from the kitchen.

“So-“

“I-“

They stop to laugh, finding their unison amusing.

Spencer’s blushes, “You go.”

“Sorry.” She mumbles. “I’m not usually this awkward.”

“What do you mean?” He’s confused. She doesn’t seem awkward in the slightest.

“I just...” (Y/N) exhales a shaky breath, “I’ve had a little crush on you for a while. Sometimes I don’t know how to talk to you because you make me so nervous.”

He can’t believe what she’s saying. “I-I make you nervous.” She nods bashfully. “W-wow. It’s just... y-you make me nervous. Ask anyone in the BAU, t-they’ll tell you that I’ve been fascinated with you for some time.”

“I honestly would’ve never guessed.” She admits. “I had no clue you felt the same way.”

“N-now that you know... would you maybe... wanna go on a date with me?” Spencer offers, rocking on the balls of his feet in anticipation.

“Y-yes! I’d love to.” (Y/N) beams, clapping her hands together in excitement.

Spencer takes notice of Penelope's continued interest, flashing her a giddy smile and a thumbs up. She jumps up and down— he can’t help but share her joy.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #sub!spencer #dr reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid smut #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #halloween #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid blurb #spencer reid one shot #baby!spencer #spencer reid fluff

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embretheworld · 3 years

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I was bored so here’s some hc’s

I have a lot surprisingly so a lot of these are coming off the top of my head

-Laxus does not have good eyesight in the eye with a scar because that's where the lacrima was implanted. But he can still see out of it, it just gets blurry sometimes.

-If you had a lacrima implanted in you, there's gonna be a scar where it was implanted, and depending on what type of magic it is determine's the shape.

-Laxus's mother was born without magic and had the same thing happen to her but she was 16 when she had it implanted in her hand, she also had asked to have one and Laxus didn't.

-Laxus was born without magic thanks to his mother being born without magic too.

-When you get a lacrima implanted in you, depending on what type and how strong it is, depends on how sick you get. It's a counterbalance so people won't always get lacrima's implanted in them. The day it was implanted you get very sick as the body's reaction to an overwhelming influx of magic in your system, it happens every year in the same day it was implanted but the first time is the worst.

-"This is what I get for being emotionally slutty," Loke probably looking back on some kind of event.

-Loke with freckles!

-Loke sleeps when he's bored.

-Lucy suffers the worst writer's block ever and can't seem to ever get out of it no matter how hard she tries(I feel you girl).

-Plue really likes candy.

-Happy got Lucy a little frame that said "Life is better with cats" for her Birthday and despite how much Happy annoys her sometimes she keeps it on the desk she writes on and treasures it dearly.

-Do not let Erza play whack a mole or the games where you have to throw balls at clowns or vases you have to knock down to win a prize.

-Or let the dragon slayers play any driving game in general.

-Horror movies do not scare Aries, a lot of things do, but not horror movies.

-Mira really likes candles, but always gets them when they're on sale.

- Gray once got banned from a strip club after being mistaken for one of the strippers.

-Juvia could literally kill someone if she wanted to since our bodies are made of 60% of water but has no idea. She desires to learn more about blood magic if she so desires but hasn't.

-Levy wants to study rune magic but procrastination is her worst enemy, also people trying to attack the guild interrupting her every time she tries to cracks open a book to try and learn it. She's stopped trying to learn it in fear that if she tries someone will start attacking the guild again.

-Gajeel & Juvia and Gray & Loke are very underrated friendships that need more attention.

-Natsu chugged hot sauce and didn't even flinch. (A friend of mine did that and they scare me.)

-Lucy carries around a box of matches just in case Natsu wants a snack whenever they go on missions.( which is a lot of the time, a lot of her money has went into buying matches, she's had to go to plenty different stores to buy some because she's scared the clerk will think she's up to something and explaining it will only make her seem more suspicious.)

-Technically demon slayers are just exorcists but with more violence.

-In a human au Gray was an exorcist once.

But in normal Fairy Tail he takes side jobs on getting rid of demons from ordinary houses or other places which pays a lot.

-The wool Aries can make, can make really nice jackets. She's made jackets using it, but Loke stole it cause he likes comfy things in general.

-Loke actually needs his glasses, his glasses double as both sunglasses and normal glasses(someone I know someone who has the same type of glasses, I also wear glasses so.) due to being in Earthland too long, certain things started deteriorating like important sense's thankfully it wasn't on a major scale but on a longer one but it can't be fixed.

-Due to his eyesight deteriorating he has better hearing.

-Loke and Evergreen are nearsighted, Levy is farsighted.

-Ivan named Laxus because Laxus looked so much like his mother it only seemed fair.

-Laxus has an aunt who's his mom's sister. He talks to her through letters because she lives across the sea.

-"My little dragon," was a nickname that Laxus's mom gave him after he had gotten the dragon lacrima implanted in him against her wishes since if they were to do it, she wanted to do it when he was 16 like her but Ivan thought 8 was a much more appropriate age. (It was not). The only one who knows of this nickname for him is Makarov, his mom, his aunt, and his dad.

-His dad once used the name in a fight against him and he wanted to punch him so bad.

-If Mira were to swear she'd put sailors to shame.

-Erza has horrible road rage.

-I refuse to believe that Loke has two sets of ears, he does not have human ears and lion(cat ears?) ears at the same time just lion ears while in his celestial form and humans ones in his human form. He wears the piercing he used to wear on his human ears on his cat ears when in said celestial form, or outfit or whatever.

-The car ears(I'm calling them that now) are actual ears, you'd be surprised how many people try to pull on them in thinking that they aren't only to be pleasantly surprised that they in fact are. He likes to be pet behind them whenever they are there and he doesn't have regular human ears.

-He also despises chokers/collars with the very soul of his being. He might hiss at you if you bring one even close to him that's how much he hates them.

He doesn't even have a reason to he just hates them.

-Erza sometimes refers to her guildmates as "Feral children".

-Dragonslayers cannot whistle if their life depended on it.

-Loke knows French because most of his masters were in the French Court meaning it was mandatory for him to learn it. (I refuse to believe anyone with common sense would date him with that haircut he had in the human world, looked like something a 5-year-old would draw on a stick figure in an attempt to draw hair).

-Levy knows French, Arabic, and a few other languages.

-She fucks with people by talking to Loke in French and making them think that they're talking about that person why they aren't.

-Mira tried to learn French, she failed very badly since she kept forgetting the parts before the word and kept messing it up.

-The dragon slayers can purr when happy, growl when mad, and whimper when sad.

-The same thing applies to Loke but mostly because he's an overgrown cat.

-In order to date someone at the guild if you aren't in it you have to get Erza's blessing/asking her if it's alright since she's kinda the older sister and also the first one you wanna tell.

-Loke does not blow-dry his hair after he washes it because it just poof's up and there's no way to fix it other than to wash his hair again and look like a drowned cat for an hour or two. Though his hair is very soft after he washes it and it properly drys and isn't wet.

-Celestial spirits can dream, but their dreams consist of looking back on old memories from an outside viewpoint.

-Freed says "Let's have another round tonight" very unenthusiastically when drunk, just that sentence, no other sentence, just that one, only when he's drunk.

-Loke's good with finances along with fashion because one of his previous master, Valeria, pushed her financial work on him as a 'learning experience'.

-Loke was also offered a modeling job before and Lucy is super pissed since he of all people can get one but not her. (In the human au, he actual does modeling)

-If Mira and Loke were to team up it'd most like to be to help people in the guild get together.

-They would succeed.

-They both also like wine.

-Loke and Erza are bi, Mira is pan.

-Upon learning about this, Juvia considered Loke a love rival, be assured her that he was none and that he'd give her some advice to trying to date Gray because Gray and romance don't go well if she kept quiet about it.

-Gray ended up figuring it out and still holds it against him.

-Loke does not like being compared to a cat, he despises it so Gray as the best friend he is does exactly that.

-The two of them have blackmail on each other, and Gray often drags Loke into watching horror movies knowing he absolutely despises him with the very core of his being.

-Gajeel will fight anyone who hurts his best friend, Juvia.

Or anyone who hurts his guild but Juvia is different since she's been with him since they joined Fairy Tail.

Natsu once grabbed a pan straight out of the oven and horrified everyone in the room.

#fairy tail #fairy tail headcanons #headcanons #fairy tail laxus dreayer #fairy tail freed #fairy tail mirajane #fairy tail lucy heartfilia #fairy tail natsu dragneel #fairy tail gray fullbuster #fairy tail gajeel redfox #fairy tail juvia lockster #fairy tail aries #fairy tail loke #fairy tail evergreen

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rawiswhore · 5 years

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Triple H x Fem Reader- “Wanna Wrestle?”

Another very goofy, silly fanfic.

Not only could what I’m about to write happen during the Attitude and Ruthless Aggression eras, I’ll save what else this could be for later.

_______________________________________________________________

1998.

WWF, like that old grey mare, it ain’t what it used to be.

Gone are the days of colorful, cartoonish and harmless gimmicks like clowns, plumbers, Elvis impersonators and hillbillies.

Now are the days where gimmicks are porn stars, sex addicts, pimps and rebellious potty-mouths who yell “suck it!” while pointing to their crotches.

It would just get even more extreme after that.

Gone are the days where female wrestlers were actual female wrestlers and not just sex objects for men to drool over. It would end up getting worse the years after that.

Yes, there still were a few female wrestlers who are legit, actual female wrestlers (Jacqueline and Chyna, for instance), but they sexualize Jacqueline and make her more of a sex object, and don’t even get us started on Sable.

And you were also a victim of that.

You originally started off as being the arm candy of Triple H when he was Hunter Hearst Helmsley, a classy, sophisticated, snobbish blueblood, where you were dressed like something from a Jane Austen or Charles Dickens novel.

But because of your rising popularity due to your beauty, as well as Triple H and Shawn Michaels idea and your past history and the WWF changing itself from family friendly to more adult-like.

Your new gimmick is to be a slutty, horny nymphomaniac. The Madonna in 1992 of wrestling.

You basically were Triple H and Shawn Michaels’ slut and sex toy with D Generation X.

But tonight, you weren’t going to be with D Generation X.

You were going to wrestle against Triple H, in the ring.

Although, you have wrestled with Triple H before, but not the kind of wrestling that involves things like Half Nelsons, ifyknowwhatimean.

You even did it in the ring a few times with him and even Shawn Michaels, sometimes even with them both, when there wasn’t an audience filled with people holding signs and posters.

During this time, there were female wrestlers who would wrestle with other female wrestlers, but some wrestlers, like Chyna, wrestled with men and even beat them.

And you were going to pull a Chyna tonight.

Your entrance music played.

Sexy, sensual music that sounded halfway like 70′s porn music.

The audience immediately recognized that music.

They went absolutely nuts, holding up signs.

You appeared on stage, dressed in a black short sleeved crop top that ended below your breasts and showed your entire bare midriff off and a pink miniskirt.

You started to slightly grind sexily to your entrance music, which made the audience go even more insane and hornier.

You were part of the reason the WWF was finally getting ratings again.

You strutted yourself down the catwalk, sometimes you “dropped it like it’s hot” on a few horny male fans like this

You did that back when Gwen Stefani was famous for being the lead singer of No Doubt and when Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas was in a girl group called Wild Orchid, and those 2 women would do what you did a decade later.

Of course the horny males in the audience were screaming their heads off over this, so much, you might be deaf after this match.

When you reached the ring, you crawled in there, some of the men in the audience were craning their necks to look up your skirt.

You stood up in the ring standing there, arms up and wide open, the males (grown men, teenage and preteen boys and prepubescent boys) in the audience were going insane over you, whistling, cheering, hollering, pumping their fists like the audiences of “Arsenio Hall” back in 1990, some of them were letting out those cheesy “wolf whistles”.

But enough about that.

Let’s get to the wrestling!

________________________________________________________________

The audience was shocked. They had no idea you were going to wrestle against Triple H, a MAN, especially one you used to tag-team with.

They expected you to wrestle with a woman.

You then ran up to the side of the ring, where you ran up to Triple H, knocking him down.

He was lying on the ring’s floor and you landed yourself on his lap, your legs on both sides of his body.

It looked like you were riding a horse, or more like, like you were riding his cock in the bedroom.

The audience was going absolutely insane over this, this looked very naughty.

They had no idea what was to come afterwards.

“Yeah, that doesn’t look too suggestive, does it?!” Jerry Lawler exclaimed on commentary.

He thought THAT was bad?

Triple H then sprung himself up, knocking you down until your back and behind your head touched the ring’s floor, Triple H’s upper half of his body stood up while standing on his knees.

Your legs were spread wide open against Triple H’s legs.

The audience got a huge uproar from this.

Men and teenage boys in the audience were cheering this, some parents with their kids were absolutely shocked at this.

You then turned your body around, where your stomach was touching the ring’s floor, trying to crawl away from Triple H, but he gripped his hands tightly onto your ankles, pulling your body up to his face.

Now your ass was in his face and your face was down in his crotch, in a 69 position.

The audience was absolutely shocked at this, going “ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!”.

But it gets better from there.

“Wouldn’t this be better if she was wrestling a woman?” Jerry Lawler exclaimed. “Like Sable?!”

The male audience was drowning out the entire room in applause, cheers and uproars, lots of “yeaaaaaaaahs!”

Triple H then sprung his body up and bucked his hips right into your ass, where your face and your body hit a big thud on the ring’s floor.

Now it looked like you were doing it doggy style with him.

If that’s not bad enough, he then lifted you from the ring’s floor and pulled up your skirt, showing your halfway bare ass.

He then lifted one of his hands and spanked your rear end swiftly, reddening your bare ass cheeks.

You cried and yelped out in pain, screaming and squealing.

The audience got a huge uproar from this, cheering Triple H on for giving you a spanking (and for showing your ass cheeks).

You then pushed your ass back against his crotch until he fell to the floor, his back making a huge thud nose once it hit the ring’s floor.

You sat your ass on his lap reverse cowgirl style, your back was facing his face.

“How can they keep a straight face while doing this?” Jerry Lawler exclaimed.

And indeed, some people were probably thinking this in the ring.

While your faces were in pain sometimes, yes, Jerry Lawler meant how can you not burst into laughter at this?

The audience ended up getting this.

All of these positions you were wrestling with Triple H with were sex positions.

Triple H then grabbed a hold of both of your ankles, gripping them tightly, and flipping and turning your body where your face now faced his own face.

His body was hovering over your body, his arms were on both sides of your body.

His face was looking down at yours in seriousness.

He then grabbed your ankles and pulled them up to your shoulders.

His clothed pants were against your pussy, but you were luckily wearing underwear and his dick wasn’t out.

“Is Triple H going to do any of his signature moves?!” Jerry Lawler exclaimed. “Is y/n going to do any of her signature wrestling moves?”

Your face was clenched in agony, like this was hurting you.

Triple H was holding you down for a good few seconds, when a referee then crawled into the wrestling ring, beating the floor 3 times.

Triple H won.

The referee held Triple H’s arm up, where the audience began cheering him loudly, enough to make your ears bleed and probably his ears bleed as well.

Triple H was out of breath, his chest heaving in and out.

Your legs in pain could now be relieved.

You breathed heavily, out of breath and sweaty.

You looked at Triple H with a nasty look on your face, angry that you didn’t win the belt.

But you honestly didn’t care about winning any plastic belt.

Triple H then stood above you carrying a belt on his shoulder and holding a microphone.

“Hey lil’ missy!” he shouted to you.

You looked up at him pouting like a kid who can’t get ice cream, almost like that infamous Miz hater in 2010.

Remember this girl?

“Since this match had some moves and positions that didn’t leave too much to the imagination, and you’re pissed that you didn’t win the belt, I shall leave this on a last note...I got two words for ya!”

The audience finished his sentence, shouting out “SUCK IT!”, where afterwards, Triple H did his iconic crotch chop and little fireworks were bursting from below the ring.

You heard D Generation X’s entrance music playing.

The audience was cheering loudly for Triple H.

After this match, since your gimmick is a slutty nymphomaniac, maybe you could have some sexual position-inspired wrestling moves from then on.

Especially with other female wrestlers.

That’ll give the WWF even more ratings and Vince McMahon even more cash.

________________________________________________________________

Not only could this have been something that could’ve happened in the Attitude or Ruthless Aggression eras of the WWF/E, this could also easily be a skit on something like “Saturday Night Live” and its ilk.

In fact, it probably is.

Also, remember that animated penguin movie “Happy Feet” where the adult Mumble met with Gloria again and they were doing all of those sexual positions after sliding on the ice? That’s what this is like!

#triple h #triple h x fem reader #fanfiction #wwf #1998 #90s #attitude era

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riotatthemovies · 5 years

Text

Zombie Hunter 2013 blllarrrgg

Zombie Crapper uhh I mean Hunter 2013

In a sea of direct to Walmart's cheap dvd rack of low budget horror and sci fi flicks, that put Danny Trejo on the cover, comes Zombie Hunter.

Generic title and generic plot.

Straight off I will say this is a little bit more polished and better paced then maybe of the soon to be in the dollar bin American mass produced B movies out there.

Stop me if you heard this plot before... Fiver o clock shadow rocking dude in a leather jacket drives the dessert roads of California in his beat up sports car with a shot gun at his side and a smoke in his mouth. Its after the zombie apocalypse and he is killing zombies for kicks and has no expectations to see any real people. Oddly he comes across a far of random survivors hiding out while being cared for by a priest played by Danny Trejo. Danny is just cheap to get and he is a recognisable name so if you get him you can put his mug and name on the cover of your movie to get it actually released in retail stores. Also he does not have to be in your movie much.. which as misleading as some versions of this movies cover he for sure is not in this movie much at all. He does get to tear his priest clothes off and fight a mutant cgi zombie that looks like a real rip off of many of the creatures you would see in Resident Evil but thats about it. Alot of the designs in this movie look cool but are completely just Resident Evil creatures. The mutants as well as the crazy people who have gone mad from eating zombie tainted meat (thats how we get one chainsaw wielding killer Clown which is kind of fun for a moment)

Also (hang on let me rant here for a moment) when ever there is a monster or zombie with a lot of effects, make up or CGI the camera flashed purple or blue and gets shaking as well as adds that awful fake grindhouse film scratching. This is not an esteque anyone wants... it was funny in the movie Grindhouse but the joke is over. We all know you are just hiding and distracting us from your cheap effects. I know I can speak for many people when i say.. show the shit effects in normal lighting, we will have our giggle and move past it. Cause trust me we are gonna laugh at the shit acting and over done stereotypes way more anyway and you cant blur that with a blue light camera filter.

Seriously the mysterious wandering hero talks in the worst Solid Snake voice that makes me just want to slap him silly with a dead fish. Our hero wandered in a leather jacket that looks like Sting (the singer not the wrestler) crossed with a strung out Constantine does not have the presence to walk around talking in an anime tough guy voice with out it being a complete joke. This movie is not taking itself that seriously but it is also not as funny as that either to merit his joke voice. Annnyways the hero called .. wait for it.. Hunter... sigh ... reluctantly teams up with the rag tag group of survivors after Danny Trejo is killed by mutant super claw monsters. Oh yeah spoiler Danny eats it early. They “team” try to get to a hidden away airplane so they can make a new go of it on a near by island... ya like I said zombie slash mad maxish stereotype.. move along.

We get two girls , one the obviously slutty one and the other the innocent “smart one”. In terrible stereotype the innocent smart one gets laid by the hero and right away lets her hair down starts to look sexy and now is tough enough to defend her self to... well thats what quick sex with a strange will do to you. Then we get the cliche slutty girl that is basically there to be annoying but just leads to that american movie myth that in the dessert there will always be a big boobed blonde in a small t shirt and cowboy boots. It’s these kind of stereotypes that I find entertaining but when you stop and write about it you realise that zombie or nuclear apocalypses near desserts tend to be very white ... odd isn’t it?

We get in this movie....

Stereotype anti heros...

Cameo of Danny Trejo so there is at least one mexican still in California..

One mad max style car that crashes early cause it probably didn't work anyhow..

Many zombies that can have there heads cut off with simply the use of a knife..

Many cgi mutants...

Cleavage...

A killer clown with a chainsaw, like I mentioned.

And 2 different moments where we watch people pee (cause that is obviously entertainment for your money).

All rolling up in an ending you have seen many times before packed in with songs by bands that sound like they should be called “3 doors theory of a nickleback calling” The kind of feeling that makes you realise that a Nevada truck stop in an apocalypse or right now would be no different what so ever.

I have seen many cheapie zombie movies in the direct to dvd or streaming section of the last few years and shockingly this is one of the better ones... listen what I am saying is this genre is fucking shit. I watch these movies so you don’t have to. You’re welcome. Now watch me walk away as I light a smoke while I walk away from a gas station... throws my match over my shoulder.. mutters.. “who gives a fuck anyways” as the match touches a puddle of gasoline and BOOM everything explodes behind me as I keep watching in slow motion while popping the collar of my jacket and putting on some old sunglasses..... hear that guitar ..... fuck ya.... ... ... fart

#Zomebie hunter #bad movies #4 life #danny trejo #sells a movie #if thats all you got

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