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spencersmagic · 2 years

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zygomycota - spencer reid

masterlist // join my taglist // navigation

prompt: "did you love her? the woman you slept with. did you love her?"

-> we already spoke but thank u so much for requesting it! (idk if yo u wanna be tagged so not tagging just in case). this was a lot of fun to write <3

couple: spencer reid x fem reader

category: a lot of angst, hurt/comfort. happy ending :)

warnings: mentions of injury, cheating, bacteria (if that's a trigger), addiction, emotional neglect (lmk if i missed anything).

***

To say Spencer’s life had been difficult was an understatement.

Being the youngest recruit in the FBI, the babyof the team, Spencer had to become as tough-skinned as humanly possible. Under all those cardigan sweaters and mismatched socks, Spencer had grown to deal with ableist insults from the local police, and superiors undermining his ability. He understood what he was going to endure in his life, and in the FBI, and he rose to the challenge – simply because it’s what he does.

He had felt his world crumble, his lungs imploding when facing the death of those he loved and, in losing them, he found himself missing parts of himself he would never get back. He had lost way too much. The knot in his stomach had tightened and tightened, now a permanent resident in his throat.

It just wasn’t fair.

But Spencer knew this. He knew that to be the person he wanted to be, he would have to become exceptional at developing a second, stronger layer, incapable of breaking until he got back to his room, hid under the covers, and allowed himself to break down. His emotions always felt like a burden, like they were created to interrupt the moments when he needed to stay strong. It took a long time for him to come to terms with the things about him that he called imperfections, such as his ability to feel so much. Imperfections which are, in reality, what make him such a beautiful person. It was also one of the areas Y/N and Spencer had to work on the most.

***

Y/N wasn’t one to shrink in the face of a challenge.

What’s more, she would argue that it was the very trait of hers that got her so far. The career of a woman in the FBI was bound to have some setbacks, after all. Her whole life, she had experienced resistance from the people who were supposed to support her and lift her up. She had been shamed and assaulted, and everything in-between. She had learned to not take any shit from anybody, no matter how much she wanted to keep quiet.

The phrase you can’t fight fire with fire comes to mind when you think of her. Her kindness didn’t go unpunished by the cruel world that surrounded her in her job, suffocating her until she goes out, but it was one of those things she had learned to live with. Spitefulness hurts people - she was sure of it.

But understanding hurts, too, which was something she never even considered.

At least until now, three months into her boyfriend’s repeated behavior of neglect, hiding, sneaking out at late hours of the night, and hushed calls with an anonymous voice, who remained unnamed no matter how many times she tried to ask. She justified her boyfriend’s behavior, allowing herself to hide inside a cocoon of emotional neglect thinly veiled with lies, at least for a while, until she would inevitably explode.

And Spencer knew she would. At one point, he almost counted on her exploding. Anything to stop the guilt that was growing inside of his chest, poisoning his every breath. He would compare it to zygomycota, in that they destroy what was once full of life and hope, and they decompose it, turning it into nothing. Eliminating any chance of a fresh new breath - one full of excitement and love and the smile on her face when he would gift her tulips.

There’s a limit to how understanding he could be with himself. At one point, the image of himself they had worked so hard to build up, to repair from the repeated abuse in his childhood, felt lost - an illusion. Another of his magic tricks, designed to deceive those around him while still knowing the magic would end up fading. And all that would be left would be him.

There’s a limit to how understanding he could be with himself. And that limit was crossed, snapped apart leaving him with no sense of direction or purpose, when he arrived home at his usual 3 am, a time he knew Y/N would be asleep and far away from any chance of getting hurt by him. He had done enough in the past nights to know he couldn’t expect to be loved by her.

But, God, he wished he was worthy of her love. He wished he hadn’t messed up as he did. That way, maybe, he could find solace in her arms after a bad case. Maybe he wouldn’t have to run to another woman for comfort, the guilt washing over him like waves slowly crushing anything in their path against the mountains.

Ironically, that’s how he felt as he walked in and saw Y/N’s silhouette under the soft light of her computer screen.

Unsure of what to do, Spencer shut the door, placing his belongings in the closet meticulously. He reached down to undo his laces, struggling to get down after his knee injury. His fingers played with the laces aimlessly as he looked at his girlfriend, trying to figure her out. Her back was turned to the door, leaning back and towards the side of the couch. In the past couple of months, she had carried on with her life, hoping Spencer would turn to her at some point. Y/N thought their relationship was stable enough that they could talk to each other about anything. Now, she was closing her eyes briefly, hugging the pillows of the soft couch and imagining she is cuddling with Spencer.

Her eyes stung as she opened them, looking back at the screen through her dried eyes. An episode of Gilmore Girls was on, though she couldn’t tell which one. The comforting show had been on repeat in her computer, distracting her from her real-life problems with the soft whining of the girls.

As Spencer stood to walk towards her, he recognized the show. They had watched a few episodes of it together before the incident, but she probably realized it was hopeless to wait for him to join her.

Who he didn’t recognize was his girlfriend. She felt foreign to him. Her face was sunken, and her gaze was unfocused. As he walked around the couch, he took in her state. Her computer screen shone softly on her face, puffy and irritated at the scratching of the rough pillows against her cheeks. Her eyes shifted to look at him, her expression unaltered, as if she saw through him. In a way, he almost hoped she would. Selfishly enough, it would be easier for him to face her.

He parted his lips, stupidly fumbling for the right words. Apparently, there are no words good enough for when you’re lying to the woman you promised the world to, so he settled for willful ignorance.

“H-How come you’re still up?” he looked into her soulful eyes. He watched her trembling hands, an action he knew came from her excessive tea drinking when she stays up at night to study, as they reached to take off her headphones, looking down.

She took a deep breath, shutting her eyes momentarily, trying to stabilize her body’s shaking.

“Do you love her?” she shuts her computer.

“W-what?” he asks, dumbfounded. In the weeks he had gone through every single scenario, every nexus parting from the point she found out about his deception, this one hadn’t even crossed his mind. Y/N could only feel her anger bubbling. Anger at Spencer, for thinking she’s stupid enough not to notice. Anger at herself. Spencer had found solace in someone else. She felt ridiculous for waiting for him to get tired of her.

She exhaled sharply, her eyes narrowing at him.

“The woman you’re sleeping with, Spencer. Do you love her?” he stood still, looking at Y/N, who had found the strength within herself to stand up and walk up to him. He had never seen her act this hostile with him.

Spencer didn’t know what he had done, but he knew there was some explanation for what was happening. He scoured his memory for an idea of what was happening, for an ounce of logic in this chaos.

“Did you hear me?” she raised her voice, no longer able to control herself. “Do you love her? Or is she like me? Someone who waits on the sidelines for an ounce of attention, of comfort, only to wake up to a cold, empty bed” she broke down, tears streaming down her face for, what felt to her, like the hundredth time in the past few weeks, unable to contain her anger for another second. The memory of the past weeks hung heavy on her heart, pulling her down. In fact, he could’ve sworn he saw her knees go weak.

Instead, she remained strong as she watched her boyfriend, the man she loved so deeply, stumble over his words. His eyes were red, and he kept rubbing them.

“Y/N”, he mumbled. “Y/N I don’t know what I did. I-I wish I did, but I d-don’t”. His poor attempt at excusing himself makes him understand her better than ever. After everything they’ve gone through… If he’s hurt his girlfriend and has had the audacity to forget how he did so, he knows he deserves to lose her.

“You really think I’m that stupid, huh? That much inferior to you?” she stared right into his eyes, inches away from his face, in a way that made him terrified of what he had done to her. He didn’t recognize the woman in front of her.

He had completely broken her.

“The woman you’re sleeping with, Spencer. Does she at least know?”

Tears streamed down his cheeks. Everything was too confusing. Overwhelming, even. How had this happened?

“I’m-“ his own sobs interrupted him, the hope for another chance pulverizing, “I- I’m not s-sleeping with anybody, Y/N”.

Y/N reached into her pocket, pulling out her phone. “How can you expect me to believe that?”. Under the soft glow of her screen, he hadn’t realized just how tired she looked. Had she even slept in the past few weeks? He could barely remember.

Spencer pressed his palms into his eyes, trying to stop the tears.

“Pen sent me these”, her gaze was dull as she turned her phone. “Four outgoing calls to a number registered as Sandra in the past week, all of them well after we’d gone to bed”.

Spencer is a scientist. He knows it wasn’t possible, but at that moment, he could’ve sworn his heart had plummeted to his feet, yet he’d never felt his own pulse as strong as he did at that moment. His mouth went dry.

“I’m sleeping in the spare bedroom. I’ll grab my things and be gone by morning”.

Gone. That’s all Spencer hears. And it’s like his body has gone on autopilot. He takes a step forward, engulfing her between his arms, the tears leaking onto her hair.

At that point, she hated him – she truly did. He had betrayed her trust, lied to her and treated her like she was nothing. Gone, indeed, was the boy she had fallen in love with, the clumsy bookworm who was too scared to talk to her when she joined the team.

But, in his embrace, she allowed herself one last touch, the loneliness of waking up in a cold bed weighing on her. The lover in her, the romantic, wanted to stay in his arms forever. Especially when the body of the man she loved shook so violently, sputtering broken apologies and incoherent syllabled between his sobs, as he lowered himself to his knees, hugging her waist.

As he cradled her body, holding onto her as if she was the last breath he could take before drowning, she felt the need to hug his head, brushing his tears away. As she pushes his arms away, they fall to his sides in defeat, and she can’t stop herself before pressing one last kiss on his forehead.

His head tilted upwards, his eyes glossy and red, and his cheeks pale, a soft pout decorating his cherry lips. “I-I- “ he tries to understand, he tries to explain, but he only shuts his eyes in frustration as she runs her wet fingers over the lines on his forehead.

And with that, she leaves him overwhelmed and confused on the floor. He wasn’t heartbroken, though. He was certain she had taken his heart to the foreign bedroom, filled with promises of a future, and empty of memories of him.

She had been numb for so long that she truly believed she would be able to fall asleep tonight, but all she could do was try to listen at Spencer crying and speaking to himself. She had only seen him like that once.

With a hand against the doorknob, she was doing everything in her power not to succumb to him. Nothing about the past weeks’ walks in the park, and innocent kisses on the subway, and origami figures he had been placing on her desk meant anything anymore. Not when he was running to another woman in the nights.

If there’s one thing she had learned in her time as a woman in the bureau was to stand her ground. Her heart broke with every sob and thud of his body onto the floor, but she also knew that the man who had promised her a future, a family, and an eternity of shared experiences had turned his back onto her for a quick fuck. Just the thought of it made her sick.

“Y-Y/N” she hears the soft knocking against the door, and she feels her whole world crumble again at the thought of having to look into his eyes.

Her fingers surround the doorknob, shaking fingers questioning their journey as she remembers, once again, what he’s done. She’s not sure she could ever stop thinking about it.

But her body knows what it wants. She can doubt and worry and try to separate herself as much as possible from the cold loneliness of the past few days, but she cannot stop herself from turning that doorknob and see him for the last time again.

“Unless you’re here t-“ she is interrupted by the movement of his hand in front of her.

“This belongs to you” he states. And that’s when she saw the blue, engraved plastic coin. “One month”.

Her face fell. “W-what?”

Spencer was adamant. He shook his head, a few strands of hair falling over his face. “You’ve made me realize that I am not a collection of the worst things I’ve done in my life; that I can be better. You taught me how to be”. The hand between them shook involuntarily as his red eyes welled up, again. “Do you remember the case in Nebraska?” she nodded, bringing a hand up to cover her mouth as he continued, “I relapsed. I-“ she gasped audibly, interrupting him. He could practically feel the pain she was feeling, and it was driving him mad. Spencer couldn’t believe he had done this to her again.

He shut his eyes forcefully before continuing. “I couldn’t believe I had let you down again, and I couldn’t trust myself again – not after how I was last time, so I got a sponsor”, he watched her face fall, putting the pieces together.

“Sandra” she whispered. “Spencer, I’m so sor-“ she reached out to touch him, to hug him, she needed to make sure he was real, but he took a step back, standing his ground.

“I know you don’t trust me, and after lying to you for the past few weeks, I know I’m not deserving of your trust. But you’ve taught me to not give up, so this is yours”.

He turned to leave when he felt her fingers around his arm, turning him and pulling him into a hug, and he crumbled like a wall around her. His arms snaked under her shoulders, burying his face in the crook of her neck, falling apart. His sobs were loud, knees weak, pulling them both to the floor.

“I’m s-so so sorry, love. I didn’t mean for this to happen, but I started spiraling and I-“ she interrupted him with a sloppy, innocent kiss. They break out of the kiss, his sobs turned to tears she was desperately trying to dry with the pads of her fingers on his face, an everlasting reminder that he wasn’t alone.

“You’ve always been deserving of my trust, Spence. I can’t believe you would think otherwise. It’s just-“she sighed, her body releasing the pain of the past weeks with a shudder and a touch. “It’s been hard lately… with us. And when Pen mentioned your calls, I realized you were drifting away, and it hurt, Spencer” she watched his eyebrows knit and his mouth twist, biting the inside of his cheek. “Of course, it hurt. But I’m always here for you. You’ve made mistakes, and I’ve certainly made my own, we are in this together, do you hear me?” her eyes pierced his own as she waited for him to respond.

“You relapsing will never be a cause for me to break up with you.” Her thumbs drew circles on his cheeks as he slowly relaxed. “I hope you know that”.

“I do”, he mumbled, shifting into her chest. He felt another apology bubbling in his throat, urging to come out.

To say Spencer’s life was difficult would be an understatement. Like many around him, he had shoved his feelings away and underground, ignoring them. To him, they were a nuisance – a bigger handicap than any other circumstance in his life. And throughout the years he had done everything in his power to rise to the occasion – to beat the odds: as a child of divorce and an unstable household, with the IQ of a genius, he had quickly learned from his extensive research that the chances of him being successful were slim.

In his many years of trying to seem enough, he forgot he had to believe it, too.

But what a waste – to make yourself feel nothing so as to not feel anything.

***

i haven't posted in six months and i'm feeling hella weird about this one. is it great? is it horrible? let me know here <3

//tags aren't working for some reason?? tumblr truly is the worst

@lady-anon-x @username2002 @eoupe @galaxydefenderjulia @urie-bowie-mercury @spencerreid-mgg @spenxerslut @huntheimpossible @onyourfingertip @idontwantyourcookiesthanks @big-galaxy-chaos @fiftyshadesofspencerreid @exhaleli @tbuhgs @strugglingtodoshitt

#spencer reid #spencer reid hurt comfort #spencer #reid #angst #criminal minds #cm #not marvel #matthew gray gubler #mgg #matthew #gray #gubler #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff #fem reader #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer x you #spencer reid masterlist

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yamilethxz · 2 years

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Matthew Gray Gubler: *Just Breathing*

CM Writers: 👀

Matthew: 👀

CM Writers: *holds up a book titled "Ideas to make Spencer Reid more Traumized"*

#spencer reid #matthew gray gubler #spencer #reid #criminal minds #criminal #minds #matthew #gray #gubler #mathew gubler

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lillyspam · 1 year

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If I don’t look at it…. I won’t… I won’t….. 🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣

#MATTHEW #GRAY #FUCKING #GUBLER #EVERYONE

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lovejules888 · 2 years

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Does anyone know what this necklace is?

#please help #new jewelry #mgg #gublernation #gubler #matthew grey gubler #Spencer Reid #Reid #criminal minds

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cannibalcoyote · 1 year

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Aaron Hotchner: First and Last Phone Call

Imagine being followed, so you call your brother (Aaron Hotchner), hoping he might save you:

Y/N's POV:

The walk to my dorm was taking me longer than usual, the recent injury to my leg was definitely not helping me.

The sun had long since set, and the darkness of the night had fully set in, my only light sources being the sparse lamp posts dotting along the sidewalk. The dark has always been a fear of mine, but my fear is reaching a whole new level right now. I'm injured, alone, and in a new environment; anything could happen to me. I keep my head up and on a swivel, turning at anything and everything.

I eventually calm down after a few minutes of excessive paranoia, instead finding comfort in the soft breeze, the leaves russling under the trees, and gazing at the orange glow of the lamps against the dark blue sky, it's actually quite calming.

Rain lightly begins to sprinkle from above, something that I embrace as I love rainy weather. Of course my clothes and bag are getting wet, but I don't care.

I almost miss the quiet scuffle behind me, the sound of light footsteps against the wet sidewalk. I turn around quickly, but I see nothing. Turning back around, I shake my head, thinking I'm being paranoid again. I continue my slow walk, my dorm is still several minutes away.

After another few moments of walking, the light scuffle is heard again, this time I immediately turn around, once again seeing nothing behind me. I glare at my surroundings harshly, I'm about to continue my trek when something catches my attention.

Along the sidewalk is a dirt area with bushes and trees, large oaks that are spread every 7 feet along the sidewalk. Nothing about that is odd, but carefully surveying the tree, I noticed the rubber toe of a shoe, it reminds me of the thick rubber sole of Vans.

My breathing feels harder, an eerie sense of understanding floods through my body. I don't have my pepper spray or any of my knives on me, I made the stupid decision that a philosophy textbooks was more important. I'm wearing my Ariat leather books, good for walking and work, but not so amazing when it comes to having to outrun somebody.

My brain is turning with thoughts of what to do, but the first thing I know I must do is turn back around and start walking as if nothing is wrong; this may seem stupid, but I can't let this person know that I've spotted them. I force my breaths to be even, and I grasp my bag loosely to my side.

Continuing to walk was very hard, especially when you know somebody is following you, and you have no idea what their intentions are.

Grasping my bag, I swiftly undo its buckles, taking care not to look like I'm rushing. Rain drips down my skin as I pull my phone out of my bag, looking closely, I notice the slight tremble in my hands and the burning of my eyes. Clicking on the only contact I can think of, I hold the phone tightly to my ear.

———————

Aaron Hotchner's POV:

I hear my phone ringing, it causes the conference room to fall silent, all eyes going to me. Sheepishly reaching into my coat pocket, I glance at the name and know it must be important.

"What is it Aaron?" Rossi questions, clearly seeing the confusion in my eyes.

"It's my sister?" My voice is deep and raspy, I haven't spoken to her since I left home, and she has never reached out to me. I don't know why she's calling, but I know I need to answer it.

"Continue without me, give me the summary on the jet." Is all I say before pushing out of my chair and exiting the room, leaving it full of confused and concerned profilers.

———

"....Y/N?" I listen closely, hearing the slight pattering of rain through the line.

"...Hey Aaron." Her voice is tight, it only increases my concern.

"Why are you calling?" My question can't help but be asked, my personality doesn't allow for the polite bullshitting, instead wanting to get straight to the point.

"I'm doing great, heading to my dorm right now actually, I know you're waiting for me." Her response is confusing, we haven't kept in contact at all, and I didn't even know she was in university. Something starts to scratch in the back of my mind, this conversation feels off.

"What are you talking about? Why did you call me?" My question is overflowing with the need for an answer, my voice lowering so that prying ears can't hear.

"Yah, I did go down to California for spring break. The horse races were crazy!" With this sentence my thoughts still. When Y/N was just a little girl, I taught her certain phrases to say when something is happening to her; and this was one of the scariest scenarios:

She was being actively followed.

My breathing gets heavier, and my heart feels like it's ramming against my rib cage. I grip my phone so tight it feels like I might crush it. Thinking quickly, I stride out of my office and back into the conference room, JJ falls silent as they all look at me.

Motioning for everyone to stay quiet, I pull the phone away from my ear and put it on silent.

"I'm with my team Y/N, tell me where you are."

"...I'm walking to (university name), I was just in town, but I'm currently passing some gas station. I should only be about 10 minutes away, so I'll meet you there." I can hear her straining to keep a normal pitch and her breaths becoming faster, alerting me that she is worried. I point at Garcia, her eyes lighting up with understanding as she begins typing away on her computer.

By now, everyone looks confused and worried, but all are in work mode.

"Y/N, you need to get into a building, I don't care which one, you just need to find other people. NOW." My voice is harsh, and I know it's not helping the situation, but I need her to be safe.

———————

Y/N's POV:

He's almost shouting at me, but I know he's just worried, I can hear the almost inaudible waver in his voice. The tears are freely falling now, I've already passed the last building between town and my university.

The footsteps behind me speed up, it seems they noticed my predicament as well, they are going to do something to me, and there is nothing I can do. I speed up as well, wanting to be able to explain everything to Aaron.

"Aar.. A-Aaron...I-I'm sorry." I can't stop my voice from stuttering, sobs now mixing with my talking.

"I'm sorry I said I hated you. I was angry at myself, not you" My words drip with emotion, the guilt that flows through me is almost as painful as knowing I'm about to die.

"Y/N-" He tries to speak, but I interrupt him as I know I have little time.

"I'm sorry that your last memory of me will be over the phone, please forgive m-" My apologies are cut short, my phone being smacked to the ground. I try to face my attacker, but a punch to the face causes me to take a detour to the floor.

The rough asphalt rips into the flesh of my hands, it burns, but not as much as the kick I receive to the gut. I scream in pain, hoping someone will hear, but knowing deep down that no one will.

The person jumps on top of me, their weight forcing my already empty lungs to collapse even further, I feel like I'm gasping, but no air enters. Everything is blurry, and wet, it's all so disorienting.

Two large hands wrap around my throat, the pressure quickly increasing; I try to fight, feebly punching him with my weakening limbs.

I feel heavy, my head foggy, I kind of just want to close my eyes and sleep. As my eyelids droop closed, the last memory I have is of a blurry warm light from a lamp post a little ways away.

———————

Aaron Hotchner's POV:

After the screams and scuffle end, all we hear through the phone is silence, someone(I assume the attacker) picks up the phone, and ends the call after another few seconds. Sadness is surging through my body, I already know tears are dripping down my cheeks, but even through all my sorrow, I remain silent.

Everyone looks uncomfortable, looks of fear, anger, shock, and concern mingling in all of their expressions. JJ is about to say something when Garcia comes bustling through the door, she looks just as depressed as I feel.

"Sir, I know where she is."

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red-drama-cascade · 2 years

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68 Kill

"In another life

I would be your girl

We would keep all our promises

Be us against the world"

#matthew gray gubler #alisha boe #68 kill #fandom #gublernation #gubler #chip and violet #chip/violet #Music: The One That Got Away by Katy Perry #criminal minds #spencer reid #mgg #mgg angst #my own

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matthewgraygublerworld · 2 years

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#criminalminds #spencerreid #mmg #gube #mathew gray gubler #gubler #gublernation

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imagining-in-the-margins · 1 year

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Happy Birthday to Matthew Gray Gubler, who has just announced his new book! 🥳💚

Release Date: September 26*, 2023.

#matthew gray gubler #gubler #gublergram #gublerland #gublernation #mgg

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in-another-april · 26 days

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objectifying spencer is my full time job at this point

#spencer reid #criminal minds #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid x reader

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matthew-gray-gubler-lover · 2 months

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if anyone has the scenes with MGG from dollface season 2 could you please send them to me, the part were Kat (i don't remember her name in the show) keeps seeing him as a pizza man and all of that, it's not on youtube anymore thank you.❤️

#matthewgraygubler #mgg #gubler

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cumulo-stratus · 3 months

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Just some director Matt <3

#criminal minds #bau #bau team #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #Mgg #mgg x reader #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubler pics

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violetrainbow412-blog · 10 months

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Decoy [S. R.]

Spencer Reid x fem!reader

word count: 6.9k

summary: when you go after an unsub who catches students making out, the unit is called upon to resort to desperate measures. Or in other words, where you and Spencer become the decoy to catch a voyeur.

warnings: +16. Making out, mentions of alcohol, mentions of violence, insinuation of smut, sexual tension

Do yourself a favor and imagine Spencer in these clothes during the case

You sighed, completely frustrated, while you looked for the thousandth time at the blackboard with some information from the profile that you had made for the criminal in this case.

You believed that the unsub was a Caucasian man between 30 and 35 years old, whose motive was to spy on and photograph university students who were escaping in their cars to make out at night, then force them to have sex in front of him and finally kill them cold-blooded. You imagined that he was a person with a mediocre job, that he felt insufficient, and that his voyeuristic behavior probably came from sexual frustration, something that could be corroborated by the violence that he inflicted on the genital area of the students whom he stalked using a knife, his mark on all homicides. You also believed that perhaps the rejection or abandonment of his last partner (preceded by a bad streak from his youth) due to his impotence had been the triggering event for all his repressed impulses to come to light.

All the psychological analysis was fine, it wasn't something you hadn't seen before, but the hard part of all this? Because he only threatened and killed people, he didn't rape them, at first it was almost impossible to tell who it was. He already had 20 victims in total and you weren't even close to catching him. In the last scene he had made the mistake of leaving a fingerprint and Garcia had been able to trace his true identity: Oliver Davis, a guy who fits the description perfectly. Unfortunately, this turned out to be useless because beyond the accusations of being a pervert, the man didn’t have much information that would give a clue to his whereabouts, you had even called the job that he had registered and all you had obtained was that he had several months without working there, which coincided with the beginning of the murders. After that Rossi suggested that he probably lived in a trailer (old, due to his lack of employment) where he developed the photographs and kept his trophies. That only made more sense when you thought that it would make it easier to transport or escape in case things got messy.

But words on paper and intelligent conclusions were of absolutely no use to you. You needed a plan to catch him.

"Do you have something, Reid?" Hotch had asked. You had already interviewed some students, you had set up guard duty to look for any suspicious behavior and you had even shared the photograph of the suspect in the media, but nothing had worked; The only thing left was to carry out the geographical profile to know the area in which he was attacking and thus be able to search for possible targets.

“I triangulated the locations we have of his previous homicides and I'm guessing he hits in this specific area,” he muttered, pointing to a space on the map he had on his blackboard with his middle finger. “Considering it's an area frequented by the age group due to its proximity to the universities and that it has several parks that the students told us they use to drink or go out as a couple”

"So what?" Morgan said from his spot. "We just wait until he kills someone else and hopefully we're near the scene to hear the screams?"

“Maybe we can ask the cops to patrol the area for the unsub's car,” JJ suggested.

“He's smart, there's a trailer park right here. It wouldn't be strange to find one on the streets as well.” Reid was visibly frustrated like everyone else and he ran a hand through his hair with some despair.

Your options were running out and frankly you couldn't think of anything else.

“And if we give him a target?” Emily murmured. Noticing that none of you said anything, she went on to explain her plan, “We ask police officers to send any young people they see around to home so we force our unsub to get close to who we want”

"And what are we going to do? Hire a couple of college kids to stalk them?”

“We can use our own team”

"Not to offend you, Prentiss, but we are no longer in the prime of youth"

"We don't, but Y/L/N and Reid do" when you heard your last name you were surprised, but when you heard your friend's you practically froze. First you looked at her and then at the doctor, whose gaze reflected the same stupefaction as you "You two are young, you might look like students"

"Are you saying you want to send us straight into the hands of a sexual predator?" you couldn't be offended, after all, those risks were part of the job, but you did feel somewhat reluctant about the idea.

“Do you have a better suggestion?”

“It doesn't sound so bad” Rossi murmured “It's a smart move”

“Besides, we would be watching around and we would intervene before that madman got close to you. Once we catch him, the photographs and personal items that he probably has in his trailer will be enough evidence, in addition to the fingerprint from the last crime scene” to your surprise, Derek was also pretty convinced of the plan that Emily had just devised.

"Reid, Y/L/N, would you guys be up for it?" Hotch exclaimed with his usual serious tone, looking at you and then at your partner.

Thinking objectively, the suggestion was very good. But thinking about it personally, you felt worried about the danger you two would be running into… oh, God. It wasn't until then that you realized that the plan to catch the suspect involved the two of you making out like a couple of hormonal college kids.

You knew that the options that remained wouldn’t be as opportune as that and taking into account the temporary nature with which Oliver operated, in addition to the fact that he was already deteriorating as a murderer, it was most likely that he was already looking for new victims, so if you did that same night the chances of success were quite high. You were between a rock and a hard place and all you could do was look at him while the gazes of the rest of the room were divided between the two of you.

“I… I'll only do it if you say yes” you exclaimed in his direction, with a cautious voice and a fearful look. You knew your friend and you didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable in any way, even though you knew that both you and he knew that your personal interests would take precedence against the possibility that another couple of victims would lose their lives if you refused. It was your job, you had to do it.

"Are you sure you guys are going to catch him before something happens?" Spencer asked your boss. You thought that with his background the last thing he wanted was to end up kidnapped or seriously injured again, even though the truth was that he was caring just as much about himself as he was about you. He had seen the photographs and knew that women were the most affected by the murder weapon… he didn't even want to imagine something like this happening to you.

"Of course. You will have communication with us and if something goes wrong we will get you out of there immediately" Aaron answered and your friend sighed nervously and then looked for your approval. You nodded slightly and he delivered the verdict, to which everyone agreed.

He was still standing, but after that he slumped into the nearest chair as he listened to everyone brainstorming ideas for setting up the scene, distributing the crew, and what they would tell the local police to do to make the decoy effective.

At some point you lost the whole point of the conversation, to start thinking about what was implied by what you were about to do.

The feeling of attraction for your co-worker had been latent in you for a couple of years, but you had never confessed it to anyone to avoid creating tension in the team or suffering the humiliation of certain rejection. Also, you knew that a crush meant distractions from what was truly important and you had tried, in vain, to eliminate it completely. But even if it hadn't completely gone, you had known how to control it, only allowing yourself to look at him with loving eyes from time to time and avoiding being too confident with him during group drinking outings. You even limited physical contact, not because you didn't like it but because you knew your greed would demand more and more of you until it became inevitable to beg for his touch. But now all that good work holding you back was screwed because in a few hours you would have to be passionately making out with him.

Still with the internal crisis, you raised your head to look at him and realized that he too had been submerged in his own tide of thoughts, which you hoped would be more positive than yours. At some point Spencer felt you watching him and when his eyes met yours he gave you that tight-lipped smile that was strangely comforting, to which you responded with the same gesture. After that it didn't take long for everyone to leave the room to fulfill their respective tasks, but you stayed seated because you honestly didn't feel enough energy to move. Besides, you had nothing entrusted to you, you were the bait.

"Hey, are you sure you're okay with this?" Spencer asked you, once everyone else had left. He looked so tired of everything, but at the same time there was a kind tone in his voice about him that made you smile.

“It's just kissing, Spence. I think we'll be fine" you assured him, trying to swallow all your embarrassment and nerves "And you?"

"I agree. I just hope we get lucky today or we'll just have to keep trying”

"Reid, I need you to tell the cops what area we'll be in," Hotch interrupted you from the door. "You still have time to regret it," he added, looking at the two of you.

You immediately denied and after that Spencer withdrew from there in the company of Aaron. When you were about to drop you exhaled, completely concerned about the last thing your partner had said.

We will just have to keep trying. You didn't know if the idea excited you, or terrified you.

As night fell, Spencer drove the old pickup truck the unit had managed to rent for the two of you to drive into the park, with you in the passenger seat and a six-pack of beer in the backseat.

Although you were sure that it would be cold, you had decided to wear shorts and a button-down shirt that you normally wore for work, but that you had adjusted to make it look more youthful. Spencer was wearing an outfit that Morgan had gotten for him from a department store, simple jeans with a rather baggy cotton shirt and some nice boots that you didn't know where he got from, since in Quantico you had never seen him wear anything like that.

Both of you had showered at the hotel (separately of course) and you had made sure to brush your teeth and put on a good amount of deodorant and perfume before getting in the car. You had paid special attention to your appearance, not because it was necessary, but because you wanted to look perfect for him. Even with all this, you were a nervous wreck next to him, not saying a word along the way and only soft music from the radio filling the air.

When you stopped, the two of you put your headphones on to the channel the team was supposed to be on, and Morgan answered in the affirmative.

"Remember, he doesn't have to see the communicator or your weapon," Rossi spoke, who was also in the van, along with Prentiss and Hotch. "García will be watching with the security cameras and he will warn us if the trailer is coming"

"And meanwhile what do we do?"

"Pretend to be a couple, sit on the tailgate and drink beer, laugh, I don't know"

“Did you ever run away like that in college?” you asked, directly at Reid.

“Do you remember that I was like 16 when I studied at the university, right? I wasn't even old enough to drive, much less a car" he muttered and you gave a short laugh "I guess you did"

“I was too busy being the best in the institution to even think about going out and making out with idiots,” you replied, proud of yourself for that. “I mean, it's not like you're an idiot, but they were. You're very smart," you rambled, still twiddling your fingers, "Hotch, you guys will tell us when we're going to start kissing, will you?"

“When the suspect approaches, yes”

"Okay, well... then we have to go out, huh?" you muttered to him as you reached for the beers and tried to open the door to get out. You turned, expecting to see Spencer do the same as you, but noticed that he had lingered in the car for a moment, checking himself in the mirror and applying his lips with chapstick.

My God, could that man make you more nervous?

When he finally caught up with you, you went to the back of the pickup, where you opened the tailgate to sit down with a little hop. Spencer was tall enough to keep up with you just by leaning over the edge, where you watched him cross his arms. You were silent for a few moments, listening to the sound of crickets and cars in the distance.

"Do you think it's a good idea to drink?"

"Only a little. I'm having a hard time thinking while sober, I don't want to ruin the little reasoning I have left” you exclaimed as a joke. Or maybe you weren't joking so much "Just empty a couple of cans and leave them on the floor so he'll think we're really drunk." Spencer was about to do what you said when you noticed an important detail and called him over to look at you "Come here, let me fix your hair."

"What's wrong with my hair?"

"You're very well combed, it's not the image we expect" you carefully took his hand until it was close enough to pass the other through all his golden locks, messing them up enough to give him that relaxed touch that he should have. He looked so handsome, but not in the style of a fancy FBI agent but just like a young intellectual who went to parties and smoked weed “Like this. Perfect"

“Do you think we have to think of some backstory?” he asked and you looked at him with a frown. “You know, something about us. What degree are we studying, what are our names…”

"This is not a play"

"It's rude to eavesdrop on conversations, Prentiss," you said visibly annoyed, although looking at your partner that expression softened "As you wish, Spencer. Although being honest, I would say that you study… literature”

"Really?" he exclaimed with slight enthusiasm. You knew that his mother had been a teacher in the subject and you wondered if he had ever considered it.

“Morgan wasn’t wrong to choose those clothes for you. It suits you” you complimented him and Morgan whistled from the other end of the line. You felt like you were having too much fun for the situation you were in, but you needed to talk about something else to put off the reminder of what you had come to do for as long as possible. “I think you would have that hopeless philosopher/romantic vibe who flirts by whispering memorized poetry in your ear.”

“I actually know some good ones”

"Sure you do" you smiled gently, suppressing the thought of him sighing close to your neck at Bécquer "I'd probably study science or something."

"The unattainable scientist with whom the captain of the soccer team has a secret crush, but she is completely unaware"

"Where did you get that? From a 90s movie?

Spencer's laugh was one of your favorite sounds and today that was precisely not helping your situation. You felt intoxicated by how handsome he looked, like you'd discovered a side to him that no one else had, and the thought of kissing him made you tremble a little with anticipation.

“Do you want to share a beer?” he murmured, carefully opening the can and offering it to you first. You knew your partner wasn't the most enthusiastic about doing anything that involved germs, so it made you feel good that he took the lead. You took a big gulp of the drink to gather something of value and when it was his turn to drink he kept looking at you intently, you would even say that he seemed entranced.

You had made sure you were in a strategic position, with enough light for the unsub to see you and quite lonely, except for the patrol cars and the van that had been positioned at a safe distance.

“How does voyeurism develop?” you asked quietly, with genuine interest, as you shifted a bit to get closer to him.

“Voyeurism usually begins in adolescence and since during that age it is usually seen with greater tolerance, there are people who continue with these behaviors until adulthood. When voyeurism is pathological, they spend considerable time looking for opportunities to watch, often at the expense of not fulfilling important responsibilities in their lives, and people reach orgasm by masturbating during or after watching. Although if you think about it a bit, everyone is a bit of a voyeur."

"Why you said so?"

“Many men and women enjoy viewing pornography, which can be classified as voyeuristic behavior. It's not a worrying thing, but it's interesting to think about it” he explained, with those expressions on his face that he had every time he shared knowledge with you. He liked that about you, that you were always willing to listen to his data and statistics even at the most inopportune moments.

"I'm still a little scared that Oliver is trying to do something to us."

“I have my gun. If he tries to do something to you, I'll use it" you knew that killing the unsub was always the last option Reid considered, so you widened your eyes a little to show your surprise "All lives are worth, but when that life has already taken so many and it puts you at risk, I would not doubt it. You have nothing to worry about” he assured you and your heart warmed a little at feeling so protected.

"Do you know if Oliver attacks at a specific time?"

"No, he doesn’t. Just as we can be here for ten minutes, we can also be here all night."

You exhaled loudly, before taking another gulp of beer.

“Drink some, boy. I feel kind of selfish around here."

"I am nervous"

"And why do you think I'm drinking?" you exclaimed wryly, still holding out the can to him, and when he finally agreed he drank a little more than you expected “Have you ever…” you started to say, but suddenly remembered that literally the whole team was listening to you. If the answer was embarrassing, you didn't want to hear Morgan and Emily taunting you all week, so you covered your microphone for a moment and spoke again, but so quietly that only he could hear you. "I suppose you kissed someone, did you?"

"Yes," he said quickly and you sighed with relief. It comforted you a little to know that it wasn't his first kiss, because you didn't want him to have such a bad memory “Do I look so inexperienced?"

"No, that's not what I meant" you smiled "You're handsome, I know you've probably kissed a couple of girls"

"You don't need to tell lies, you know I'll kiss you anyway"

"But it's not a lie. I really think you're handsome" you confessed, gathering all the courage in you, while you smiled at him in the most serene way possible "And if we weren't literally waiting for a murderer, you know I'd be happy to do this with you"

"Smooch me?"

"Having this bad date attempt, Reid," you hissed, flushing red, as you slammed your palm into his forehead with just a little bit of force. Spencer seemed quite pleased that he made you nervous, rather than the other way around, so he grinned, “Though I think we should have brought food. I'm starving,” you pouted, swinging your dangling legs back and forth.

"That's not a picnic, Y/N"

You hated for a second that everyone was so intent on the conversation. A part of you wanted a moment alone with the brunette, even if it was in the midst of such a strange situation.

You began to talk pleasantly about things completely unrelated to the case for a couple of minutes, staying where you were, until Hotch's interruption made you jump a bit in place.

"Garcia intercepted an approaching trailer, get ready” your heart immediately sped up and you noticed him tense beside you, too, probably with the same thought flooding his head.

"Okay, come closer," you exclaimed, trying not to panic, as you spread your legs a little to allow the man to step into the space between. He wasted no time and just as you wrapped your hands around his shoulders you heard the sound of another car pulling up.

"Is that our unsub?"

"It is"

You were about to turn your head to peek when Reid grabbed your cheek and stopped you.

"He's smart. If you look at him, he'll realize it” he reminded you with a serious voice. You were so worried about everything that you were forgetting about your training “Okay, so I… Is it okay if I put my hands here?” he asked with a different tone, nervously placing both hands on your waist. You had always admired the size and anatomy of those hands, but until now you had not had the pleasure of feeling them on your body in this way.

“Tonight everything you do is fine. I promise"

"It would be a good time to start, he'll see you" Emily reminded you and you could only sigh shakily.

You two were adults, why were you so scared about kissing?

"Close your eyes" Spencer whispered to you, masking his nerves better than you "I'll kiss you, just close them," he asked you and you did.

You felt his body lean against you a little until his chest almost touched yours and then his lips shakily pressed against yours. You would always remember your first kiss, which in essence was such a brief caress that you didn't even know if it could be counted as one, the one where he wordlessly asked your permission to explore your mouth. Still with your eyes closed, you pulled him by the neck towards you and started a new kiss, a little more confident and deep this time, allowing you to savor the beer mixed with strawberries and that strange flavor that each person has.

“We…” you started to say, once you separated “you have to do it slowly, what he wants is a show” you exclaimed. Spencer felt unable to say any words and your hands caressing him so deliciously wasn't helping at all “Slow,” you repeated.

You arched your back a little to get even closer and when you finally looked up you met his caramel eyes. You needed a moment to recover and you unconsciously licked your lips, as if you needed to pick up and savor his presence in your mouth again, something that didn’t go unnoticed by his attentive look at your movements.

It didn't take long for you to give up, as beginning the third kiss you felt that you no longer had any control over your body, your heart, or your mind. And while it was true that neither of you were experts on the subject, you guys managed pretty well as the seconds ticked by. Spencer gasped as he simultaneously felt you pull the hair from his neck and caress his lips with the tip of your tongue, while you were taken by surprise when his hands left your waist and lowered to the height of your hip, where his thumbs gripped firmly on the clip of your shorts.

There was a kiss, then another and another; they became too many to count. You didn't want to touch him anywhere and at the same time you wanted to touch him completely, in the grip of the fantasy that this was real and not just a performance. And even if you were aware that it was all fake, that would probably only have encouraged you to enjoy something to the fullest that you knew would never come back. Amid everything you didn’t know which of the two situations would be worse.

The sound of your lips colliding became so obscene that you were embarrassed, but you had no plan to stop. Your hands slid gently down the length of his neck until you reached his chest and cupped the soft cotton of his garment in your fists to make sure he didn't move away from you. The heat of the moment just went up and up, but a voice on the intercom brought you back with a jolt.

“He started the trailer. He's going to go"

Spencer closed his eyes in frustration, and you sighed. From the position he was in it wasn’t possible to get around him without being seen, so keeping all his attention was on you and him.

Maybe you weren't doing it right? You wondered what the hell this man wanted to see if you were practically eating each other, but suddenly you remembered that his motivation was even more sexual than a couple of wet kisses. Maybe he was getting bored because he needed to see that you were about to… well, do it.

"Take off my shirt," you said immediately, still too close to his swollen lips and looking right into eyes that seemed to be pitch black.

"Take... what?"

"Take off my shirt" you repeated, with a tone that made the man shudder completely. With the hands that were still holding his shirt you pulled him to you and he held his breath “And kiss me better. Like you really want me"

But Spencer didn't need to pretend that he wanted you.

He made you completely dizzy when he began to kiss you so hungrily and you managed to keep enough composure when you felt one of his warm hands travel under your blouse, limiting yourself to letting out sighs that were drowned against his lips. But what finally caused you to let out an indiscreet and unwelcome moan was when he pulled you by the hip until you were on the edge of the tailgate and you could feel the growing bulge in his pants pressing against you. Spencer had almost managed to suppress his, but in the end, you having your own situation down there didn't help one bit.

His trembling fingers fussed with the buttons on your shirt until it ended up somewhere on the floor at incredible speed, leaving you half-naked before him and the collection of FBI agents standing around. You might have been embarrassed if your brain could connect two coherent thoughts, but you'd lost that from the moment Dr. Reid first dared to kiss you.

You carefully guided his hands to the beginning of the curve of your breasts and now you both sighed in unison, feeling goosebumps on every inch of your skin. You pushed yourself forward just for the satisfaction of hearing that guttural sound again and your prayers were immediately answered, for it was enough for him to feel the slightest friction and he would go crazy. It was inappropriate to need him like that, but you couldn't help it.

Holding your lower back, he leaned over you and at the same time pulled you towards him until your breasts collided with his chest. In that position, your neck was exposed and your partner’s hot lips didn't hesitate to go down there, while you sighed agitated just at the height of his ear. Spencer asked you, between each kiss, to look in the direction of the trailer to see if he was still there and as you could you answered yes, which was victory enough for both of you.

As he could, he maneuvered to lay you down carefully on the cold metal of the truck without stopping kissing your neck, and by inertia you wrapped both legs over his hip. When you were hidden by the panels of the pickup he finally looked at you.

"I hope it's enough to get his attention," he said, sounding as agitated as expected, and although the circumstances meant that you two would be taking a break you flatly refused, pulling him back to kiss him.

That kiss did take Spencer by surprise and it was perhaps the sincerest of the night. It wasn’t as passionate as the previous ones, but rather it was loaded with softness and you would even say that a hint of supplication. You were begging for him not to stop, for the night to get stuck in an infinite loop where the two of you could kiss for eternity. And suddenly you felt how he, who had been so tense the whole time, completely relaxed against you, as if he understood exactly what you wanted to say. His hands came to rest on the sides of your head to be able to kiss you more comfortably and you dared to take him by the waist with the same care that you were kissing him, feeling even above the cloth the softness of his skin.

And then he broke up with you. You feared you had done something wrong due to the suddenness of the movement and your frightened eyes searched his gaze for a sign of the reason, without finding anything. He just looked at you with something you couldn't describe, but that made you feel butterflies fluttering all over your stomach... and he stayed like that for a few seconds: just looking at you, as if he wanted to memorize all your features.

You opened your mouth to say something, but your words were drowned in a new kiss, totally different from the previous ones. Spencer was taking time with him, trapping your lower lip between his and sucking on it gently, pressing himself a little more against your body, sighing heavily into your mouth.

Your hand was already running up his side to make its way to his cheek just as screams filled the silence and you hugged him reflexively. The screams had come from Morgan, who had already moved across the park to take down the unsub and was now wrestling with him to get the knife out of his hand. Spencer hesitated for a moment if he should come over to help, but he preferred to hold you better against his body to protect you and wait for Emily to place the handcuffs on the man under her partner's knee.

From a distance you saw that he only brought with him, in addition to the knife, his camera, and a small backpack with some other murderous instruments that they managed to confiscate without any problem.

"All clear, we've got him," Hotch spoke over the radio. As you exhaled in relief too many emotions washed over you, combined with the adrenaline coursing through your body and the arousal still flowing into your crotch.

"Are you okay?" Reid's gentle voice called to you, as he pulled away to check with his eyes that everything was in order. His hair was messy and his lips were so swollen that it was almost painful to look at the image without launching yourself to kiss him again "My God, your shirt..." he said, completely embarrassed, as he bent down to pick up the garment. You looked him up and down and blushed when you noticed how tight his pants were, feeling your stomach turn a little. When he got up, he took the opportunity to look at your chest covered only by the black lace bra and a big gulp of saliva went down his throat.

You thanked him quietly and put your shirt back on, feeling the sneaky glances Spencer was giving you, just before Hotch walked up to you.

"How are you?"

"Very good, excellent" you stammered.

You could perfectly feel your swollen lips, the light sheen of sweat on your face, the heat flowing from all the places Reid's fingers had been, and the abundant moisture between your crossed legs.

After Hotch congratulated you on your performance, the two of you walked as best you could toward the rest of the agents, who were already placing Oliver on patrol. Another group was analyzing the trailer and they managed to pull out enough evidence about the murders that would be very useful in prosecuting the man.

"All good?" Emily asked in your direction, once things had settled down and the rest of the team had gathered in a circle by the van. You and Spencer just nodded at the question.

“I honestly think I'm going to need therapy after what I heard,” Dave murmured, so serious that you couldn't help but burst out laughing.

"Don't you even dare make fun of this"

“No, we won't. I'm just saying you guys seemed to be enjoying it there."

"That's supposed to be the plan, right?" Spencer said nervously, finally daring to look at you and looking away almost immediately as he smoothed his hair back.

Once your boss said you could retire you escaped in a patrol car as fast as you could, wanting to get home so you could take a cold shower and soothe what wasn’t satisfied by the man. You could hardly sleep that night, still haunted by the ghost of the kisses you received from your gorgeous coworker, and the next morning you hoped that double coffee would do the trick. But apparently you weren't the only one who thought so, because at the same time that you arrived Spencer Reid crossed your path.

"Hey," he said, in that high-pitched voice that came out when someone caught him off guard, "How are you?"

"Fine, and you?"

"Fine too"

You knew that the two of you wanted to talk about what happened, but it only took one of you to have the courage to speak first. At the same time your phones rang indicating a message and you mistakenly assumed that it was JJ contacting you to announce a case. What was your surprise when you opened the file and found a collection of photos from the night before. You knew from Spencer's face that he had received the same thing.

"Garcia did you… did she send you the same evidence?"

"That's right," he said nervously. You had to admit that if Oliver had one quality it was that of a photographer: you were sensual and perfectly captured the desire that had existed between you. Well, the one you had pretended to feel… right?

Spencer held his breath as he came to a picture of you topless in which his hand was practically on your breast, immediately remembering how that had felt. He just hoped his memories didn't affect him too much or it would be embarrassing enough to walk into the boardroom with a boner.

"They're good," you said to the air and he suppressed a laugh "But I can delete them if that makes you feel uncomfortable"

“No, no, I… I think I want to keep them too. After all, the bureau will have them in the files as evidence of the case, I prefer to have access too”

"I just hope she doesn't send them to anyone else, I wouldn't want to see my bra photos going around."

“I'll tell Garcia, don't worry,” Spencer murmured, rushing to type something on his phone.

While you waited for him to type you took another look, feeling your whole body heating up again at the memories. A part of you was grateful to have such material in your custody.

"I never thought of being the protagonist of an erotic photo session and here we are," you said ironically.

“Speaking of which…” Spencer started to say, “Not the erotic sessions by any means, don't think I'm planning on inviting you to one or that, because it would be super weird and inappropriate, but I was thinking if… huh…”

“Sell them online? I thought so too, but it depends on how much profit there is. Garcia can help us find the highest bidder and not get charged for tampering with evidence."

"What? No!" he said, completely shocked, and you laughed because you got the reaction you expected with your joke "Why would we do that?"

“Just kidding, Reid. Those photos are something I prefer to keep to myself" you clarified and your smile made him feel shy "Seriously, sorry for interrupting you. What did you want to tell me?"

"What…? huh, yes, right. It's just that this morning I was thinking about what you said yesterday, about how under normal circumstances you would have liked to have a bad date with me, right? and it just kept spinning in my head, so I was asking if you wanted to go for a drink sometime. Not like a date, of course, I'm not saying it is if you don't want to. I can just be like… well, go get a drink. As friends"

Yesterday Spencer had practically eaten your mouth and now he was nervous about asking you out. So adorable.

“You're not doing this just as compensation, are you? because you know that it is not necessary…”

“I do it because I want to. And I want to believe that… that I didn't misunderstand what happened yesterday."

You no longer even cared that it was unethical to date team members, or that if things went wrong, you would probably go into the worst of depressions. What mattered to you was that Spencer was interested in you, even if he had implied it, and that he was asking you out alone with him. Just the two of you, with fun and alcohol involved, without gossipy colleagues or mortal danger.

"Then I'd love to, Reid."

“Wow, excellent then” he smiled, feeling lucky that you agreed “I know a great bar near here, the atmosphere is generally calm, I like it because they don't play loud music. What day is right for you?"

“I'm available any day you want” you responded genuinely, grinning from ear to ear just being around him. That was the effect Reid had on you.

It was stupid to try to deny that you were still attracted to him, especially since now you had a taste of what he could do with you. You wanted to kiss him again, of course, but you were also anxious to earn that completely adoring look you'd received the night before.

“Today?”

"Yeah, why wait?" you responded, more excited than you wanted.

“Hey, I didn't ask you, but I wanted to know if I didn't go overboard with you last night. I mean… did something bother you?”

It was a smart move, you could see it clearly. It was obvious that Spencer cared about you, but you also picked up on his intentions to find out if you were interested in him too. Well, that's how it was from your perspective, because that probably would have been your motivation being in his place.

Even if it wasn't the case, you weren't going to miss the opportunity to take a little advantage of the situation.

"The kisses on the neck were something he definitely didn't expect, but they weren't unpleasant at all," you assured him, feeling your cheeks heat up again. "Did it feel good to you?"

"It did"

"So everything's perfect," you murmured, shrugging off the matter. But you both knew you couldn't see each other in the office and acted as if nothing had happened.

Something had happened. Those kisses had only fueled the tension that had always existed between you but that you wanted to ignore.

"Do you want to go after work, then?"

“Sounds good to me”

Spencer gave you one last smile and then went to prepare his usual cup of sugar with a dash of coffee. All day you were thinking about him and more than once he caught you looking at him, but you didn't even care.

So, at nightfall, with a few drinks on you and more courage in your body, you finally confessed that kissing was something you had wanted to do for a long time. You almost didn't believe it at first, coming from him, but when you finally accepted it, it wasn't hard at all to rush at him and kiss him feverishly. And this time there did not impede for you to give free rein to your desires, which led you to the soft mattress in your friend's house and kept you awake until a few hours before dawn.

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