#fuck yoooouuuuuu

[six-of-ravens]

it is deeply annoying stumbling around in my apartment in the near-dark, but then looking outside and seeing all the businesses still have their big fuckoff LED signs on

#fuck yoooouuuuuu #theres one across from me that has this colour changing light display #totally unnecessary #like leave your floodlights on for safety or whatever but come onnnn #theres a clinic i can see that 100% is not open at 7pm on a Saturday and their sign is still on. why! you're not open!!

[crowsflag]

WODKSKWODKSNKSDKKSOSDKJD THREE DRAWS THIS YEAR WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING

#AUSTRALIAN RULES FOOTBALL THE FUCKING SPORTS GAME THAT YOU ARE #I HAAAATEEEE YOOOOUUUUUU #afl.lb

[sandpapersnowman]

me: so just be back at like 2 :3

customer: okay!

it: is 2:45

they: have not returned

#fucking haaaaaaaate yoooouuuuuu

[dykeseesgod]

(trying to look in the invader zim tag) the hardcore child dib x 5 million year old irken zim yaoi with penis and fucking and porn image:

#🫀 #ZA.DR FUCKS I HAAATTTEEE YOOOOUUUUUU

[wizardfrog69]

Hey again! :D A similar request as the last one, but this time the child is smaller (10-11), and Fyodor and Nikolai raise them together! I just wanna see how good they would be at parenting together TvT (i love your writing!!)

Thaaaank yoooouuuuuu :))))))

Thanks for your request!!!!!

'•.¸♡ parenting ♡¸.•'

Gn!reader (platonic)

Fyodor x Nikolai ig, weather you see it as platonic or not is up to you.

Fluff

Masterlist

Enjoy!

Again, who the fuck knows where Nikolai found a random child but he found you and now he's rasing you with Fyodor.

Tbh they are shit at parenting, like a clown and a manipulative bitch as parents? That child is growing up to be fucked up for real.

Okay, I've calmed down a bit, let's continue.

In this scenario Nikolai and Fyodor live together.

The first time Fyodor met you was when he came home to you sleeping on the sofa and Nikolai making something to drink in the kitchen.

'Why is there a child in out living room?' Fyodor asked, confession lingering in his voice.

'Their name is y/n and they are our new child!' Nikolai explained with a smile while preparing a cup of tea for Fyodor.

'Why?' Fyodor's tone was more of an annoyed one this time.

'Why not?' Nikolai placed a tea bag in a cup before pouring the water in.

Fyodor just sighed and accepted the fact that you were going to live with them now.

Fyodor isn't around that much naturally so you were closer to Nikolai but whenever Fyodor was around he didn't seem as scary as people made him out to be.

Fyodor did try to take care of you properly, educating you if he had the time and when he didn't he told you what to learn and gave you a plan until your next lesson, Fyodor wasn't the best teacher and had a hard time comprehending the fact that you were 10 and 10 year olds (including most of the population) aren't as smart as him.

Does Nikolai try to teach you anything? Nope, maybe some magic tricks here and there but other than that not much. Education is restricting in some ways and doesn't let the mind be creative and learn on its own so they way to be as free as one could get is to not learn stuff which will restrict the person and their imagination, now one should still attend school because you need to learn and stuff.

Since Fyodor is out at work most of the time you are left alone with Nikolai, you're too young to be left alone so Nikolai has to take care of you but he also has work and who else would be a great Babysitter than everyone's favourite: Sigma!

Nikolai said he had to go to work and you couldn't go with him so he took you to a good friend by the name of Sigma.

Without a knock Nikolai burst in through the door and startled a man sitting by a desk doing some paper work. 'Quiz time! Why am I here?' Nikolai announced while you awkwardly stood slightly behind him. Sigma didn't answer and only stared in disbelief at you for a few seconds before practically shouting at Nikolai 'Why on earth do you have a child with you?!'

Nikolai only laughed him off and started to walk up to him. By the time you two were in front of the desk Sigma calmed down and spoke in softer and more calmer tone to you trying to be as nice as he could while not being irritated by Nikolai. 'Is everything okay? Do you need help?'

Nikolai laughed at his questions and asked him to look after you for a while before leaving you there.

Sigma became a regular Babysitter to you and the longer you spend there the more activities became available to you. Sigma get some board games or something so the two of you could play while being there.

But what if Sigma cannot take care of you? Well the only option is bring-your-child-to-work day for Fyodor. He told you to just kinda chill there and stay quiet as he typed away but you cannot expect a child to sit I'm silence for hours and hours on end.

'Fyodor... I'm sorry but I'm hungry.' You were sitting on the floor surrounded by cables and what not. Fyodor stopped his typing and look at you, at the time and back to you, it was (whatever time you eat dinner) so he decided to take you somewhere to eat something.

The most likely scenario is the two of you going back to his house so he can make something for you to eat but if he's in a rush he'll get take out or something.

Since today was more of a busy day for him he told you to get up and the two of you left for town to get something, he wasn't going to call for take out, that would risk people knowing where he lives and that is bad, very bad.

You had a great time out, you did mostly walk in silence to the restaurant and turn back but it was still nice. On your way there you spotted a cat and wanted to pet it but Fyodor was moving quickly ahead and didn't bother to stop for a simple cat.

Once going back the cat was still in its and you ran up to the cat carefully as to not scare it away and started petting it. The cat was woke up but didn't move still enjoying the sun. Fyodor caught up to you rather quickly but instead of moving along not paying attention he stopped and let you pet the cat for a little before telling you that you two have to leave.

You two got back and ate your food making light conversation

I don't believe Fyodor has any other chairs beside his own in his office so you have to sit on the floor or stand.

Overall Nikolai and Fyodor aren't the best parents a child could ask for but not the worst, they care for their child and their wellbeing.

Also Nikolai insists on calling him тато (tato: dad) or pa or something like that.

༺♡༻ 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 ⋆ 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 ༺♡༻

Тато is Ukrainian btw

His is longer than expected and honestly I could keep going.

Have a wonderful day/night and do something you enjoy.

-love, Az

#bsd #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs #nikolai x reader(platonic) #fyodor x reader(platonic) #nikolai gogol bsd #bsd nikolai gogol #nikolai gogol #nikolai x reader #bsd nikolai #fyodor x nikolai #fyodor dostoevsky #fyodor x y/n #fyodor x reader #bsd fyodor #fyodor fluff #fyodor x you #fyodor #nikolai x fyodor

[wtfuckevenknows]

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

- Cee♥️

CEEEEEEEEE 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

I love that we're all going with questions we know the answer to tonight 🤣

I'M EXCITED TO FINALLY MEEEEEEEET YOOOOUUUUUU!!!!!! 🫶🏻

And I'll also meet @heartstringsduet at the Taylor Swift concert in Vienna, which adds two more things to the list! (I am planning to come up to Berlin before that, but who knows)

Going to a Niall Horan concert in March and to the final weekend of the ATP tournament 🎾 in Stuttgart in June!

Also really looking forward to making myself at home in @beautifulhigh guest bedroom...we've established I'm moving in once my body allows flying up there again right?!

The thing I am most excited though is my body finally being good as new again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jan 15th is circled very fucking red in my mind because it's the day I'm finally allowed to use my second arm again, and according to my docs I should have fully recovered from shoulder surgery and breast reduction by spring, so just in time for me to come out of winter depression and live my best life again! (let's hope my thyroid cancer doesn't require another surgery, check up is scheduled for Feb 22nd)

Last but not least, I can't wait to get back to work (but first I'll be hitting unemployment on Monday)!!!

End of the year Asks

#really hoping to get back to work by February preferably #March at the latest #I hate that I can't make concrete travel plans right now without a job #thanks for the ask <3 #end of year asks

[frostbitepandaaaaa]

HI FROST HAPPY BIRTHDAY, you are a joy to the fandom and i'm so glad to have you around these parts of the internet! 🥳

i have nothing except this gif and belatedly dedicating beard smut in your honor since you were 50% of the enabling responsible for it hGFJDSK

OH MY GOD!!!!! CAITLIN YOU ARE SO SWEET!!!!!!!!!!

thank you thank you thank yoooouuuuuu!!! i am so grateful to be apart of this lovely little community and i am thankful to have met you and become friends! i WILL be reading beard smut soon i promise and i cannot fucking wait. love you oh so much my friend, thank you so much again!! (and fuck you for that gif my lord)

#frost has mail #i am feeling so loved #astromechs

[vividviolence]

yoooouuuUUU INSIGNIFICANT FUCK! THIS IS NOT OVER.

May your woes be many, and your days few.

#snickspeaks

[spellboundcities]

Oh shit! One of my favorite artist to draw Jay made a Jay ask blog? Sign me the fuck up!

YOOOOUUUUUU ARE SO GOOD TO ME orz

#every time someone calls me their favorite artist i have to resist the immediate urge to cry /posi #THANK YOU!!! SO MUCH!!!!!! #local cryptid answers #guest star anon

[i-hold-horrors-hand]

Drunk Papas Headcanons

Primo: Despite his age, he can drink quite a lot. He holds his liquor well. Doesn't even seem remotely drunk. Until he hits his threshold, then he just passes the fuck out. He's still fairly horny up until then, however. (And he has, more than once, passed out while on top of a lover. Or passed out while a lover was on top of him)

Secondo: He loses his inhibitions while drunk. He'll act sillier and wilder, and goes into Party Animal Mode. And, of course, he's still horny. He's also a lot more likely to express his emotions more openly than while sober. You'll be unbuttoning his shirt, getting ready to fuck, and he'll put a hand on your wrist, look down at you, and say "You have no idea how much you mean to me." Somehow, he manages to avoid having hangovers. Usually.

Terzo: He is a horny, emotional, and klutzy drunk. He stumbles to the point where he can barely walk, and he's prone to emotional outbursts (any kind, but usually tears). He's putting his usually-smooth-but-now-kind-of-sloppy (and hilarious) moves on you. He stumbles over to you (bumping into things along the way), tries to convince you to go to b ed with him, and cries when you say that he's too drunk for that. "B-but...amore...don't you want me?" is how he replies. He stumbles backward a bit, falls flat on his ass, and just starts crying. He takes sips from his drinks in between overly dramatic sobs.

Copia: He is a horny and affectionate drunk. He'll stumble over to you, wrap his arms around you, grind on you, and say "You're so pretty...why are you so pretty?" And plant the sloppiest kiss on you. He giggles and says "I love yoooouuuuuu" while leaning on you so he doesn't fall over. And when he's not hanging off of you, he of course humps the furniture.

#papa emeritus i #papa emeritus ii #papa emeritus iii #papa emeritus iv #papa emeritus 1 #papa emeritus 2 #papa emeritus 3 #papa emeritus 4 #blank blogs dni #scream cleaning

[howdoyousleep3]

mama k!!!!!! about the meal-making tinder guy

i’m still with him😳

he picked me up and then we watched a movie but in the middle of the movie he left to go to the store cause he had forgotten to buy the sauce n he asked if i wanted anything at the store so he bought me chocolate as well

he cooked for me, (delicious) and then we watched shrek afterwards (😭😭) and theeeen we went to bed

we cuddled for a bit and then he asked if he could kiss me (asked!!😫) then there was some heavy petting and then we went to sleep

he hasn’t woken up yet but his room was fucking freezing so i had to get dressed and now i’m sitting in the living room waiting for his alarm to go off. he’s going on a little daytrip with some buddies so he’s gonna drop me off at home in like an hour😀

i think we’re meeting again on tuesday🥲

(also this fucking guy does the dishes WHILE cooking, leaves his washing machine door open so nothing molds, he uses sunscreen, brushes his teeth before leaving the house, and his dick was CLEAN!!! and this is just stuff i’ve noticed since friday!!)

UGH BABE I’m so happy to hear this has turned out so well for yoooouuuuuu ugh he sounds like such a gem! My heart went pitterpatter at him asking if he could kiss you. 🥹 He sounds so lovely and I can’t wait to hear more updates! 💙

#askK #not fic related #so cute! #meal-making tinder guy

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

"my boy since 2020"

He DOES NOT FUCKING KNOW YOOOOUUUUUU

[cuandocuentascuentos]

Wey, me siento inspirada. Me siento yo y huele delicioso. Season finale will be in Mexico!! I’m so exited! 🤩 I’m literally living in my movie AND I LOVE IT. I highly recommend it. Be delusional, be extra, be unapologetic, BE YOOOOUUUUUU. And fuck the haters, fuck the stalkers. I thought only famous people had fans, but it’s time to accept my existence drives some people crrrazy obsessive and that’s none of my damn business 👸🏻 It is what it is 👑 And im not here for you baby, im here for me 🕺🏻

Julio 2023

[birbfeeder2artisticboogaloo]

Let's play a little game if you want. Pick one: purple or yellow? apples or pears? butterflies or bees? chocolate or caramel? stripes or dots? bus or train? coffee or tea? pumpkin or potato? mango or coconut? candles or fairy lights? spotify or cds? sea or lake? piano or violin? palmtree or christmas tree? pen or pencil? summer or winter? chris pine or chris evans? lil nas x or orville peck?

right LET'S DO THIS 💪😤 i prefer........

purple!

apples 🍎

BEES 🐝

chocolate pls~

ahhhhhh this ones difficult.......idk i've worn stripes and dots at the same time before bc i didn't want one of em to feel rejected ;A; but i think i like stripes just a smolllll bit more 🤣

OOH A TRAIN

in this house we hAVE A SUP OF TAYYY like me old granny would have done ;A;

SPUDS SPUDS SPUDS 🥔🥔🥔 what kind of irishman would i be otherwise?? A BAD ONE 😤

hmmm im not terribly fond of either mango OR coconut........they both smell very nice but mango makes my tongue feel strange ;A; my mam LOVES mango tho so i will go with MANGO lol 🤣

OH I LOVE CANDLES but im not allowed play with them ;A; i used to wait till they melted and then spill some of the wax onto a bit of paper to make ''''seals'''' out of it. except then i accidentally lit a bit of paper on FIRE while doing that and,,,,,,,,i mean i put it out very fast but there were.......slight damages. so no more candles for me lmao 🤣

i actually don't use spotify!! idk how it works at all, tho ive been curious since everyone's been posting about 'spotify wrap' and it looks interesting! for now i'll have to say that i prefer cds, since they're all i've got! 💿

THE SEA THE SEA!!! I LOVE THE SEA!! 🌊

oh god oh fuck. how could i choose between piano and violin?? i've tried both, i LOVE THEM BOTH ;A; but i suppose i have a bit more natural talent with the piano. so i SUPPOOOOOSE i'll say........PIANO 🎹 (forgib me, sweet 🎻 ;A; we'll be reunited someday!! THIS I SWEAR ;A;)

i love palm trees!! they're so pretty!!! i wanna touch one, the bark looks like it would feel...........scrunkly 🌴

pencils please!! :D

SUMMER. ALWAYS SUMMER. never winter. icky winter. i hate the cold. i LOVE the warm and the sun. BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL SUMMER ;A; COME BACK TO MEEEEEE SUMMER I MISS YOOOOUUUUUU 😭😭😭

i think i like chris evans better!! no hate to mr pine, ive liked him in a couple different films, but he was in that shite 'frozen (2011)' rubbish ''''horror'''' film and i can't forgive it for upsetting me >:( bad choice mr pine. it's not ur fault, but ur visage only brings back painful memories rn ;A;

i'm afraid idk orville peck! but i've heard a bit of lil nas x and i liked his song about the old town road!! also the music video where he gave the devil a lapdance! that was such a power move 😎

tee hee this was fun!! 😄 thanks for the game, anon!! now it's ur turn~ will u tell me ur answers to these questions?? (only if u want to ofc, pls don't feel pressured!! if ur busy or if u just don't feel like it, that's totally fine!! no hard feelings, i'll not be mad! im almost never mad tbh 😅)

#birb answers an ask #ask game #this was funnnn!!!! #thanks for including meeee ;A; #and thanks for sending me an ask 💚💚💚 #EVERYONE JOIN IN!!! if u want to ofc lol #i wonder if any of the music i like is on spotify??? #i also wonder how much it costs lmao

[deanwinchesterf]

i could rant about dean all day but it would not be coherent and probably amount 100% to me just screaming FUCK YOOOOUUUUUU to everyone who dares mention my boy. none of yall know him none of yall get him right thank you and good night

#noone should be allowed near him

[mdma-na]

already lost 5.5lbs again this week and I'm almost back to my weight before recovery :) amazing how a broken heart helps you lose weight quickly lmao

#you are so perfect for me and i really love the time with you #just need to lose like 4lbs again #he liked my recovery body so much #i hope he dies when he sees that im starving myself again :-))) #fuck yoooouuuuuu #ana tw #ana #ana thoughts #anamia #ed #ed tw