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okeymakeydude · 4 years

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Sorry sorry and sorry for responding too late.

I refer S/O as They/their

Request by @thewinterflagforever .

Engie. (Inspired by this post made by @snoozyhooter )

If they had free time, Engie would propose to do a picnic. He doesn't want something too boring or simple but also, exaggerated. He'd offer to make the food, and look for the best place to eat, surely chooses one where they can see almost everything. He doesn't hesitate to bring his guitar to sing them some songs.

They have to stay in the base? No worries! That won't stop them. Both can be working in the garage and keep talking about how their day was while they are doing their business. This man loves helping his S/O and spend time with them.

"Hey hon." "Yes?". They looked at him and smiled, he was with his arms open, waiting for a cuddle. Engie being a extrovert person and even touchable, the hug is something different and important for him, only for the people who really he cares about and one of them is his S/O. Prefers face-to-face to see their face.

Sniper.

He will take his S/O to a place where the sun is the protagonist, why? 'cuz he loves seeing how the sun is falling and giving permission to the night. Near his camper, they would prepare a campfire, to cook something and just, talk about how their day was. Like Engie, he prefers easy plans without exaggerating.

If they have to work, Sniper will be watching that no enemies approaches to the base and his mate doing their job, and at the same time, protect him from spies. They both would be in a room, only for Sniper, but he'd invite his S/O. It'd be more silence but that doesn't mean they're unsure, just on the alert.

Being honest, Sniper is not a big fan of cuddles (excepting his parents). He's like a 'suprise hugger', because no one will never know when he's gonna do that. S/O is surprised when they feel arms around them from behind and, a head resting on their shoulder. Then a soft voice near their ear "Don't know how much i love ya."

Demo.

Does his S/O love party? Hope so 'cause this man does! They would spend the evening going to bars or nightclub; Dancing and drinking. However, if there is a quite place, like a beach with few people or none, they would sit and talk about everything and, i mean, everything.

Nothing keep him away from fun, with a few bottles bought and the only thing left to do is to have the party in any part of the base. Second option? When he makes bombs, he has to see if they really explode, what could be better than throwing some to the opposing team? Without doubts, he'd ask his S/O to come, they are the one who gives him more entertainment.

Demo'd hug them every 5 mins if he could, he wraps his arms around their waist, warmly towars him, looking each other. He loves seeing their face. God, he said once "I got a manky eye, i'm a black Scottish cyclops drunk!", what he did to deserve them? What did they see in him good? S/O would respond his questions and he'd happily listen.

Scout.

A walk through the nearest town or city is enough. Holding hands, they go to look at the things there; they buy sweets (or buckets of chicken), go to the shops or even play in the park. If there's a funfair nearby, Scout will do the 'puppy-dog eyes' so he can go and suggest paying for both, the first traction would be... well, the tunnel of love.

Near base, he has an area where he can do whatever he wants, mainly sport, they can pass the evening practicing and challenging each other or, sitting on the grass and letting nature be the protagonist, Scout'd bring what is needed to draw and be happy to tell about his comics!

Sideway hug. At first nervous, unsecure, he prefers to start with an arm around S/O's neck and get them close to him 'discreetly', "it's getting cold, yeah?" just give him a second before he decides to completly cuddle them and hides his face on their shoulder.

Heavy.

When his family moved to U.S.A, near him, he'd like to pay them a visit and more with his S/O. Yes, it may sounds boring but he really cares that they know his love perfectly and is sure his mother will love them. Clearly they'll have some privacy at some point, "This is for you, со́лнышко" he'd use it that moment to give them 13 flowers, all possible colors except yellow and 3 kisses each cheek. A tradition for someone he would give even his heart.

If they have to stay in the base for any attack, Heavy would be reading a book while his S/O is relaxing by his side doing something else, even teaching them some russian words if they're interested o translating the story. Another option would be Heavy cleaning his weapons while he shows them and yes, even he likes to brag about it.

Bear man? Bear hugs! He does everything he can to put his arms around them, carefully, like a shield. Wants to make them feel protected, nothing is gonna hurt em, not in Heavy's watch. He doesn't forget the soft kiss on their head.

Pyro.

Well, the name already say it, they (Pyro) would be trying to burn everything they can all the evening and proudly show it to their S/O. They would be holding hands and going everywhere without wasting time, until Pyro saw the sun and decided to stop moving, he sat down and rest their head on S/O's shoulder, completly in silence.

Sleepover. Being inside of the base isn't gonna prevent them to have fun, with a lot of food, fluffly toys and makeup, it's enough to stay in their room for all the evening. Pyro would paint the nails of their love while they're talking how their day was and eating all the candies. Later they go to Medic because stomache.

A tight, strong, loving, breath taking embrace, a way to say how much they love their partner. A bear hug but a bit different, applying a powerful pressure, and making S/O immobile. Luckly not enough to hurt them and just for a few seconds.

Medic.

"Look, schatz! We can use its organs for—" "Oh, don't you dare! I swear - No!". Wasting all his time in his laboratory, makes him a bit umconfortable staying outside, but he'd accept if it's S/O, a walk near base. Ngl he adores talking about himself about the progress he's doing, the ideas he has or what Archimedes did, he laughs and then... He apologizes, but his love assures they won't never get bored listening to him. Only got scared when he saw a roadkill and started to approaching.

He needs an assistant while he's working, an excuse he often uses when he wants to spend time with his love, and it works. Loves seeing Archimedes rubbing his head against their check and will whisper "Why you...?", because he also doesn't know what he did to deserve someone like them. Likes to observe how the sunlight creates different perspectives on their beauty while they're talking.

Another nonfan hugger, he usually does it unconsciously and when he's very happy, jokes aside, he's really strong, enough to lift his partner with his arms around their waist and leaning against his body. When he realized it he didn't help but blush.

Spy.

A hot air balloon trip? Spa? A meal at the best restaurant and hotel in town? Going to a concert or theatre? He just looks for anything to surprise his amour, he likes the exaggeration and extravagance of dating, to show that he's determined to use his time and attention for them. He has already prepared everything that will be done during the afternoon until nightfall. However, he'll change plans if they have another idea, he'll try to please them.

In his private room, S/O is free to do whatever they want, read a book? Look at the fireplace? Take a nap? Talk? Go ahead. "Mi casa es tu casa" he's say with a smile, he's not that talkative but with them, he's confident to do that until someone have to stop. By the way, did you know Spy is good at giving massages?

Being someone who stabs from behind, doing back hugs, means a lot, he doesn't like giving 'em but trusting his loved one, wants to say that they're safe and protected by him. He hides the head and give a quick kiss on the back of the neck.

Soldier.

"See those submerged logs over there? That is The Beatles! Do not stop running!" "Okay...—wait what!?". He's able to sum up a 1600 hour tour in just one afternoon, holding their hand and with a big smile, he will show them everything he knows and be proud of that. Has anything caught his love's eye? Don't worry! He'll get it for them, if they're happy, he's happy too! Everything gangsta until there's is a neck snap.

In his "secret" space, he'd love to show them how good he is teaching the students (Ignoring that they are decapitated heads), and may sounds weird, he would be able to talk quietly when there is a debate or a talk. He will be happy to teach rocket jump if S/O is interested and any moment, he'd let them see a beautiful place where they can watch how the sun falls.

A bear hugger too. When he's joyful, when he won a match or because he wants, his S/O will be the first one to know it. He will put his arms around their waist and bring him closer to his body, placing his face on their chest. Don't miss this opportunity and respond him in the same way! His cuddles are gold.

Masterlist.

If there is any mistake, please, correct me.

#team fortress 2 #tf2 scout #tf2 spy #tf2 engineer #tf2 sniper #tf2 medic #tf2 demoman #tf2 heavy #tf2 pyro #tf2 soldier #tf2 request #tf2 headcanons #sorry xd #tf2

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boneswriteswords · 4 years

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And I'm not good giving ideas or prompts but mmmmmmmmm.... First kisses for Raphael or Leonardo and it's their s/o the one who initiated it???

A/N: Okay so I tried to keep it short but apparently I can’t do that. Thank you nonnie for sending this in. I appreciate it.

I picked Raph because I haven’t written for him in a while.

Unbeta-d and probably horrible because I did not beta this and writing was more of a stream of conscious sort of thing so read at your own risk.

~~~~

It was a regular night.

Briefing for patrol. Patrol. Stopping a couple bad guys. Finishing patrol. Arguing with Leo over some stupid nitpicky thing. Stopping in to see Y/N as she closed up shop at 2am. Taking her home - part of the way on the tops of buildings with her tucked safely against him and the rest on the sidewalk below with her beside him. They had done this same routine for over a year, the night the same as the hundreds that came before it. He took the same path to her place so often that he is surprised that he can’t see his footprints embedded into the concrete.

And yet, tonight, something felt off. He couldn’t put his finger on it but there was something in the line of her shoulders and downward tilt of her mouth that concerned him, tension curling in his shoulders. Something has changed, if not their routine.

At first, he thinks that maybe it's because he is off. He thinks of the static building inside of him that makes every touch between them - every tiny brush of her fingers as she grips onto him, every bump of her shoulder as they walk - feel like lightning is hitting him. The touches linger for long minutes after they’ve ended.

She is lodged under his skin, a simmer wil-o-wisp flickering as it jumps from vein to vein.

And he is scared that she knows.

That she somehow found out about the thoughts that turn him over in his bed, wound up and unable to sleep. The thoughts that he spends most of his waking life trying to ignore because the suffocating sort of hope that he is prone to feeling is distracting and he doesn’t think he could stomach talking to Splinter about his inability to focus.

If he was alone, he’d allow himself a few moments of self-pity, complaining about the cards he was dealt in this life and his inability to turn them around in his favor. He’d curse his form, his differences. He’d mourn for the life he never got to live.

But he wasn’t alone. Y/N was with him, walking less than a foot away from him but still a hundred miles in the distance. She was smiling now though, the faintest upturn of colored lips, and he ached.

“You alright?” he asked before he could stop himself, “You’ve been quiet all night. I was expecting the next installment of “Why wont my manager fire Nathan?”

She laughs and the sound rings through him. The blocks are quickly disappearing under their feet.

“Just thinking is all,” she responds, nudging him with her shoulder. He nudges back.’

“About what?”

“How to get Nathan fired,” she jokes, leaning into him and he can tell she is back in the present completely. Her grin is brighter and he can’t help but grin back. He knew she was lying. Something was weighing on her heavily but he knew she wouldn’t talk about it until she was ready.

The light from the street lamps cling to the line of her jaw, down the hollow of her throat, to rest on the edges of her collarbones. He wonders what it would be like to touch it. Would the light cling to him too? Or would it run from him?

He chooses not to respond but she nudges him again, adjusting her walk so she is touching him as much as she can while they walk, gravitating around him. His skin still feels electrified and he doesn’t want the sensation to stop. His brain is screaming at him to do the smart thing and take a step away from her, pull away so the static stops but his body disobeys. The hope valiantly tries to claw its way to the surface and he attempts to bury it in the hollow of his chest again.

The silence that falls between them feels significant.

It feels like its building.

It feels like it's waiting for them to do something about it, taunting them with its weight.

He knows she feels it too.

So he takes a breath, swallowing in an attempt to say Y/N’s name again, but before he can, she stops. He almost stumbles forward with the abruptness of her pause, only just realizing that they’ve made it to their destination.

His hope deflates like a balloon that hasn’t been tied off. Raph wasn’t a believer of fate, not in the way Donnie or Leo are, or in pre-established choices, like Mikey, but there is a sense that he’s missed a chance he will never have again. He keeps the disappointment off his face, the collapse can consume him later.

He wouldn’t let her see that.

Y/N swings her hand a little, her fingertips brushing the outside of her hands in the sweetest of touches.

It feels like a snapped wire against his skin, sparking dangerously.

“It was a nice night. I had fun,” she says quietly and it sends a cacophony of thoughts through his head. It’s not something she would normally say to him when he took her home. It's not part of the routine. This part usually consisted of a smile, a hug, some variation of ‘good night,’ and him watching her enter the building before climbing up to make sure she got inside her apartment.

This is different.

It also didn’t make any sense.

“Yeah?” he answers once it becomes clear she is waiting for a response from him, “I -uh….”

“Yeah,” she interrupts, her eyes darting to meet his eye for a brief moment, “I always have fun with you.’

It feels like he swallowed his tongue. He tries to make his body move but it’s frozen. He can feel his heart stutter and pound and the blood rush from one place to the next and he can’t focus-

She pulls away, the smile still on her face, and starts up the stairs. He says something back but he isn’t sure what. It sounded garbled and distorted and he is fine with leaving it a mystery because he’d rather devote the brain power to watching her walk up the stairs. He didn’t have to justify why to anyone but if he did, he’d say he just wanted to make sure she got in the building ok. The stairs were a bit crooked too. She could trip and fall.

Yeah it sounds like bullshit in his head too but he knew the whole “I can’t bring myself to move because I’m too much a love-struck fool to move.”

Y/N pauses by the entrance, keys in hand - he can see them glittering, catching the light from the doorway. He’ll continue on the routine as normal and try to convince himself that nothing about tonight was anything different than all the others on the way home. He’ll put it out of his mind as best he can until tomorrow night, when he picks her up from work again.

She remains still for a few moments, head bowed and he wishes he could see her face. He wants to know why she’s stopped. He wants to know why tonight feels so different. He wants to know why it feels like he’s going to collapse and reform in the middle of a New York street. The longer she pauses, the more it feels like the sidewalk has consumed his feet. He is rooted down, no longer in control of his body.

He watches as she turns around, keys back in her pocket, and comes back down the steps, faster than when she went up them and it feels like all the air has disappeared from his lungs.

So, when she’s back by his side, hand reaching up to tug him down to her level, whispering “Please?”, all he can do is nod. He’s wide-eyed when he feels her lips on his, the hope inside of him crashing against his insides in victory and relief as her hands come to land on his cheeks.

He leans into it completely, arms wrapping around her waist and pulling her bodily against him and tilting his head to deepen the kiss until there are colors flashing beneath his eyelids. Her lips are soft and smell like vanilla and he chases the taste of her, running his tongue along her lips until she lets him in. She sighs against his mouth and it almost knocks him to his knees.

A small eternity later and she pulls away, looking small and awestruck and a bit dazed. She has the same look she gets when she gets stuck in a sentence because she can’t think of the right word. He’s smitten.

“I wish I had done that sooner,” she says, voice nothing more than a wisp, moving her hands over his cheeks and down his neck, the static crackling as she does. Her eyes are roaming all over his face, looking for any sign that she overstepped. He could see the thoughts swirling behind her eyes, the perceived consequences of her boldness weighing sullen and heavy.

“Me too,” he rasps, tugging her back into another kiss before she could doubt herself.

By the time she makes it to her apartment, he’s lost count of how many times they’ve fallen back into each other, murmuring that they need to stop. Parting seemed to hurt her as much as it did him and her reluctance to let him go sent him into a fit of giddiness. He’s grinning as he watches her enter her apartment and slide down the door, her fingers pressed to her lips as she giggles.

Tonight was strange, he decides as he climbs up to the roof and jumps to the next building. There is new energy in his body.

But it's safe to say that this break in routine was the best thing that ever happened to him. He couldn’t wait until tomorrow.

~~~~

End

~~~~

#ask #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt #raphael #raph #raphael x reader #tmnt imagine #My writing

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hati-skoll · 6 years

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Madam Malkin’s Manual for (dis)Robing Wizarding Royalty

@promptis-fanweek Promptis SFW Fanweek Day 8: Free Day

This is kinda overdue, but I’ve had this scene stuck in my head for some time and I thought I might as well put this up for the fanweek.

Rating: T

Warning: Brief mentions of fat shaming

[AO3]

When Prompto finds out that he's landed a job at Madam Malkin's for the summer holidays, he thanks his lucky stars, which are finally shining on him after staying stubbornly indistinct for the first twelve years of his life. Well, he also thanks Lunafreya, who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who somehow got Prompto's name through the door. Look, he's not above a little nepotism if it's going to get him robes that actually fit for the next school term. He needs those robes.

His current ones are two sizes too small, maybe three. And yeah, he knows he's a 'growing boy', but he also knows he's 'growing' into his robes all wrong. A couple of guys in his transfiguration class have taken to calling him Pudgy Promp, and that's one of the nicer names they've come up with.

Unfortunately, his parents are strictly middle-class in muggle Nifleheim and wizarding currency has been appreciating against the Nifleheimian gil for the past couple of years. His family's finances are stretched thin just covering his textbooks. Of course, he qualifies for Hogwarts' Muggleborn Bursary for Wizarding Essentials, but that only affords him the luxury of shopping at Second-Hand Robes, and he's learnt quickly enough that wizards his size aren't in the habit of donating out their old uniforms.

Which leads him… here. Summer apprenticing at Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. And the best part of it? Staff discounts.

"Prompto dear," Madam Malkin calls and Prompto quickly snaps to attention, "Could you fetch that latest shipment of demiguise pelts from the back? Lord Abbot just put in a new order for invisibility cloaks and they need to be completed by next week."

"Got it, Madam Malkin," Prompto answers while ducking into the store room.

He locates the pelts after several minutes of blind fumbling. This will be a lot easier if he could summon them with an accio, but Madam Malkin's declared it best not to perform any spells on untreated material of magical properties prior to proper charming.

That's not to say, Prompto doesn't get to practise any magic at all. Because he does. He's done a lot of levitating and vanishing over the past month and a half in Madam Malkin's service — which is far more magic than whatever he's allowed to do at home, in muggle Nifleheim. The Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery would have him slapped with a warning letter in a hot second, if he so much as tried a paltry wingardium leviosa in his bedroom.

He carefully hefts the pelts up to Madam Malkin's work table. They’re surprisingly heavy, and he's beginning to feel beads of sweat gather on his forehead and pits while trudging up the stairs. Well, he could always use the extra exercise. Just got to… think positive, you know. He's been working on his physique ever since they turned him away at the Hufflepuff Quidditch try-outs. But it's a slow, arduous process.

Okay, there. Prompto breathes out a sigh of relief, depositing the pelts where Madam Malkin wants them. He's about to make his way back to the receiving area, because the morning crowd's trickling in and they'll be all hands on deck soon enough, when the doorbell chimes. And he would have called out the customarily enthusiastic 'welcome to Madam Malkin's!', but it balloons in his mouth and effectively chokes him so he's a wheezing mess as Hogwarts' resident Lucian aristocrats come traipsing into his previously peaceful but eye-candy-less summer vacation.

The first person through the door is a tall, lanky fifth-year Slytherin — Ignis Scientia, who's been a shoo-in for Head Boy ever since his first day at Hogwarts, as the rumours go. According to those very same rumours, he's taken and aced every subject offered including a couple of NEWT-level classes, after going through some iffy advance placement thing that the professors put together specifically to cater to his genius and Lucian monarchical administrative duties — which is insane, if not impossible. The house elves adore him because he pops by the kitchens to bake every now and then. And he’s deadly in Quidditch, even though he's never had the time to play on the house team.

He's immediately followed by Gladiolus Amicitia, Gryffindor Quidditch captain, and the best keeper Hogwarts has seen in decades. He's been scouted by the Chudley Canons, Stonewall Stormers and Toyohashi Tengu. They even wrote a feature on him in Seeker Weekly! He's turned down all the offers, of course, which everyone thinks is a downright shame, not that anyone'll ever dare say that to his face, because he's famously proud of his future career in the Lucian military and notoriously loyal to…

Noctis Lucis Caelum, Lucian Prince, Gryffindor's star student and the final member of the trio who’s walking into the shop, stealing the limelight and many a fair maiden's heart with his (mysteriously!) hooded gaze and (artfully!) tousled hair. Prompto quietly whimpers when the target of his gigantic schoolboy crush huffs irritably and flicks his bangs out of his eyes, utterly destroying whatever hope of coherency Prompto’s been holding onto. They're in the same year, Noctis and him, but Prompto's never shared a class with the prince before. He doesn't think they've even been in the same room, save for all the seasonal feasts held in the great hall, where Noctis sits all the way up front with his Shield at the Gryffindor table, and Prompto sits all the way at the back with the rest of his Hufflepuff cohorts.

"Good afternoon. We're here to purchase a set of Gryffindor robes," Ignis says, by way of greeting.

"Good afternoon dears. New robes for Mr Amicitia?" Madam Malkin ambles over, tittering, "Or are they for His Highness?"

Noctis shuffles forward a little and says, "They're for me."

"Why, you must have grown two inches since the last I saw you, Your Highness."

"And a half," Noctis says, quite proudly.

"Still a little squirt, though," Gladiolus adds.

Noctis shoves at him, but Gladiolus doesn't budge. "Shut up, I only look small because you're so bloody big."

"Now, boys, there'll be no roughhousing in my shop," Madam Malkin warns, although she doesn't put much steel to her voice, because you just… don't tell the Prince of Lucis off — not unless you're the King of Lucis or Ignis Scientia, "And we've got the lot over there. We'll have you fitted up in a jiffy, just head right on, dears."

Ignis nods. "I hope you won't mind if we cast a couple of disillusionment charms while we're occupying the room."

"Oh, go right ahead. You really don't have to ask every time you're here," Madam Malkin says, "We can't have His Highness' robing habits plastered all over tomorrow's Prophet, can we?"

"No, we cannot," Ignis says, "Your kind consideration is appreciated, as always."

Then the trio disappears into the fitting room, with Gladiolus and Ignis none too subtly shielding their prince bodily and Prompto accordingly attempts to disappear behind the bannister. Alas, Madam Malkin spots him not making himself useful and waves him over. "Could you help His Highness with his fitting, dear? I know you haven't had much experience with that, but Prince Noctis is an agreeable sort. You won't be having any trouble with him."

"But—"

"You're in the same year at Hogwarts, aren't you," Madam Malkin pauses, "I hope you boys aren't at loggerheads because of that house rivalry nonsense."

"No, no. We're— We're cool. His Highness is… cool."

Madam Malkin considers him meaningfully. "Is that so? Well, then, off you go, dear. It's not nice to keep a customer waiting."

Which is how Prompto finds himself knocking on the fitting room door, sweating buckets and trying to recall Madam Malkin's Manual for Robing Witches and Wizards — of which he's read a good dozen times, but is completely escaping him in his state of utter panic.

The door opens.

It's fortunately Ignis at the doorway, whom Prompto's marginally less terrified of because he always carries with him this air of formality that lends every situation some degree of verisimilitude.

"I'm… here to help with the fitting?" Prompto's not sure why he's making that a question, but. He's not sure how he's here in the first place.

Oh right. New robes. Summer job. Madam Malkin's. Robbing— Robing Prince Noctis. That makes sense. Sort of. Ugh, does it? He wonders if he can surreptitiously pinch himself without anyone noticing. Seriously, how is this his life?

Ignis smiles, a fraction above polite, green eyes glinting as he says, "Of course, thank you for your promptness."

Prompto dips his head as he slips into the room, which is decently spacious and surrounded by neatly ordered shelves of fabric. The prince has already gotten up on a footstool while waiting for him, looking terribly bored but devastatingly gorgeous nonetheless. At the opposite wall, Gladiolus' standing at attention, looking intimidatingly large and largely intimidating, but he catches Prompto's gaze — brown eyes just as piercing as Ignis' green — and offers up a friendly enough grin. Prompto relaxes by a tiny, tiny bit, before he remembers belatedly—

Rule Number One: Don't make eye contact.

With… the customer, right? Which means the prince. Ignis and Gladiolus don't count, do there? Prompto frowns, trying to call up—

Rule Number Two: Don't… Don't— Okay, so he can't actually remember what rule number two is, but he thinks it's possibly, 'Don't slip and fall and coincidentally pull the prince's pants down'. Because that sounds like something that should be in the manual. Definitively.

Like he wouldn't want to be that guy, you know. Wouldn't want to be hanged, drawn or avada kedavra-ed, whatever it is they do in Lucis, for unintended assault on important personages. Then, he's losing his balance, arms wind-milling, outstretched hands desperately grabbing onto something for purchase and suddenly, he's staring at the prince's bare, perfectly shaped knees, before glancing up to see a pair of dark blue eyes startled wide.

Oh, what do you know, two rules broken in one fell swoop.

He doesn't know how he manages to get his vocal chords working but he somehow stutters out, "Oh. My gods. I'm so sorry. Itwasanaccident. Pleasedon'texecuteme."

The prince gapes at him. A second passes, and then two. Then Noctis' cheeks are flaming as he yanks his trousers up, out of Prompto's grasp, and.

Prompto half-expects Gladiolus to haul him by the collar, toss him out on his ass and demand he duel for the prince's honour — not that the prince's bodyguard has a reputation for being violent, in fact, he seems like an all-round swell guy, but. There's got to be royal protocol for this, hasn't there? Some official statute in some official penal code about the appropriate course of action when the prince's modesty has been outraged?

Whatever it is, it's probably not 'laugh uproariously while the prince chucks something at your head'. But that's the course of action Gladiolus decides to take.

"Heavens, Noct. Is that not the pair of briefs I'd laid out yesterday? What happened to the freshly laundered ones I'd prepared this morning?"

"Specs," the prince groans, long-suffering, "I don't like that pair."

"They're perfectly serviceable. But if you find them so objectionable, you had only needed to inform me."

"Next topic," Noctis says, making a face. And Prompto's just recovered from the shock of not being executed, or sent to the gallows, or expelled from school, only to be faced with the awful realisation that he now has to live with the knowledge of Ignis Scientia laundering the prince's underpants.

Ignis sighs, wordlessly summoning something — small and… round-ish? — to his hand. "It seems the button's come off your trousers. We'll have to make do with a Sticking Charm for now, but I'll have it fixed when we're home. I've a good mind to take it up with your tailor, in any case, such shoddy handiwork is inexcusable — what if that had happened in front of the press?"

"I'll— I'll pay you back," Prompto blurts out, and wishes he's kept his mouth shut immediately after, because in what universe would he be able to afford replacing the prince's pants? All three other occupants in the room turn their attention to him and he thinks this will be a great time to wordlessly cast a disillusionment charm on himself — if he actually knew how.

"Nah, it's fine," the prince finally shrugs, "It was an accident."

Prompto briefly considers tattooing that onto his arm, as a memento of his first and possibly only conversation with the Prince of Lucis. But Noctis apparently hasn't gotten the memo that princes don't just go about interacting with robing apprentices, because he continues, "You're Prompto, right? You're friends with Luna."

Lu… na? Prompto frowns. "Lunafreya?"

"Yeah," Noctis shrugs, "She pointed you out when we were watching the Hufflepuff Quidditch try-outs. You play seeker?"

Okay, so Prompto knows that Lunafreya's probably a member of some high-standing wizarding family — just from the way she carries herself, you know. She's always so… poised. But he's never known that she was that high up the aristocracy rungs. He really ought to brush up on his wizarding politics. God, and she's had to witness his pathetic crush on Noctis for the past three years. He thinks back on all the times she's tried to get him to talk to the prince and colours.

Prompto realises a beat slow that the prince is waiting for some form of reply. "Um. Yeah. That was probably me."

Noctis grins and Prompto swears he sees flowers blooming in the background. "I play seeker too. Just made it onto the team last term. Guess we'll be seeing each other on the pitch next tourney."

"Ah," Prompto busies himself with the draping of the robes on Noctis' shoulders, studiously adjusting the hem while trying to figure out a proper response. "I… didn't make it. Onto the team?"

"Oh," Noctis says, and there's a length of awkward silence, before he continues in a voice that's both genuinely apologetic and flatteringly confused, "But you flew really well at the try-outs."

"They, um, said I wasn't… aerodynamic enough?"

There's another length of silence. And Prompto thinks that will be the end of their conversation, because he's honestly embarrassed himself enough in front of his crush. But Noctis evidently still hasn't received the memo, because he eventually says, "That's bullshit."

"Wha— Huh?"

"That's bullshit," Noctis repeats, "Doesn't matter how… aerodynamic you are, as long as you're quick on your broom and you've a good eye for the snitch. You were the strongest contender they had for seeker."

Prompto won't deny his heart lifted at Noctis' so vehement vote of confidence, it's kind of… nice to be validated, by the prince no less. "Yeah, um. I'm trying out again next term, anyway. And I've been working out. So I'll be more aerodynamic come next try-outs." Hopefully.

"It's still bullshit. Gladio tell him."

Gladiolus scratches his head. "It shouldn't matter as long as you're a good flier… theoretically. But, yeah, some captains prefer smaller seekers on the team, because they make more difficult targets for bludgers and opposing beaters and seekers."

"I can't believe you!"

"I get it," Prompto says quickly, before hexes are fired, "We all want what's best for our teams. It's cool."

Noctis scowls as his Shield bumps their shoulders together.

And Ignis gives a discreet little cough, effectively quelling the squabble with a stern look. "Alright, I'm sorry to have to cut this conversation short, but we do have other errands to run. It's been very nice meeting you, Prompto. Thank you for helping Noctis with his fitting."

"Um. No problem?" Prompto squeaks as Noctis hops down from the stool, shrugging his new robes off into Ignis' waiting hands, "It's really nice meeting you guys too."

He quietly trails after the trio as they exit the room, thinking this is finally it, his final moments of being in the presence of Lucian royalty. And he's fully intent on savouring it to the very last second, but yeah, his luck's never held out for so long, so he doesn't know why he's been expecting it to. Noctis, Ignis and Gladiolus have wrapped up their purchase and are in the midst of leaving Madam Malkin's, when the dreaded couple of guys from Prompto's transfiguration class swagger boisterously into the store. Of course.

He notices them too late to duck behind a nearby cloak rack.

"Hey," one of the guys call, Prompto sends a silent prayer for the prince to be out of earshot, "It's Pudgy Promp! You didn't tell us you were working over the summer holidays! Think you can get us a discount?"

Noctis pauses at the entrance. And Prompto knows he's heard everything. Gods. He really could use a disillusionment charm right now. Then the prince turns around, glancing over at the group of guys with cool, indecipherable eyes, before that quietly intense gaze settles on Prompto. "Oy."

The other boys fall silent when they notice that the Prince of Lucis is standing right there. And Prompto feels like he's dreaming. He has to be. Maybe he really ought to pinch himself now.

Noctis grins and raises his hand in a little wave. "See you at school, Argentum."

"Uh," Prompto gapes, he knows for a fact the other guys are gaping too, "See you at school, Lu— Lucis Cae…lum?"

And… ugh, he'll be replaying this moment in his head for the rest of his life, cursing himself for that awful foot-in-mouth moment, but Noctis doesn't seem to mind — he just smiles a little wider, then flounces out the door with Ignis and Gladiolus at his heels. And Prompto realises belatedly that he's grinning too. In the next moment, the guys from transfiguration are staring at him with a new-found sort of wary respect, which feels great, by the way. And Prompto's quietly promising himself — he'll make it onto the Hufflepuff Quidditich team next term, then by the next summer holidays, he'll be back here at Madam Malkin's, getting new robes. Seeker-sized.

#ffxv #promptis #noctis x prompto #noctis lucis caelum #prompto argentum #fanfiction #promptis2018sfw

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kingfallstranscripts-blog · 7 years

Text

Episode 18: Make King Falls Great Again

Sammy:Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to a very special daytime broadcast with Sammy and Ben.

Ben: We are live at the Main Street park celebrating a very special day with what looks like the entire town.

Sammy: I gotta tell ya, while I've got my doubts about the veracity of the claim today -

Ben: Don't.

Sammy: Let me finish...this defiantly brings a smile to my face and warms my heart to see this massive turn out. So many familiar faces...and voices. This is a big deal...

Ben: Yeah, Sammy, it is a big deal. Can you name another town in history that's been voted best small town in america 7 years straight?!

Sammy: Legit? Or just by the Chamber of Commerce?

Ben: ... that's besides the point.

Sammy: I think that'st he actual entire point, Ben. This is propaganda.

Ben: Don't!

Sammy: But very lovely propaganda, no less.

Ben: Don't go all "conspiracy theorist" on me. You don't even believe half the stuff that walks right on through our radio station door!

Sammy: You know what, you're right. I'm just gonna punt this care package of sense and reason right out the door and instead celebrate our towns storied history like a patriotic citizen.

Ben: That is good to hear.

Sammy: You're ridiculous.

Ben: It is what it is man! Regardless of who voted on this, I believe it is the best small town in america.

Sammy: And you know that is what really counts.

Ben: You see that parade, Sammy? How can you be pouting over statistics with a parade like that?

Sammy: It was a beautiful parade. I'm not completely sure that the day-time strippers from Sassy's House of Ass should have been along side the rest of the floats, but... not my call.

Ben: I will concede you that point. Although! A big shout out to Karen's Craft Corner for best use of paper mache on that stripping pole.

Sammy: *chuckles* Folks, I know you aren't used to hearing out voices in the daytime, but if you are in the area, you should really come on down. It's a hell of a party here. Fair type atmosphere, there's balloons for the kids, lots of heart stopped cholesterol laden treats.

Ben: Plus! The official coronation starts in less than TEN. FRIGGIN'. MINUTES people and you don't wanna miss it. So put some stank on it, and high tail it downtown.

Sammy: (monotone) So... I know that I have to introduce the mayor.

Ben: (mimicking monotone) Can you please hide the excitement from your voice, Sammy? We don't wanna cause a panic.

Sammy:*chuckles* As I was saying, I know that's coming up in just a few minutes, but you do have a guest for us before -

Ben: YOU KNOW IT. This is really special.

Pete: (in the distance) King Falls AM? I can't believe those two jokers are still on the air! I say, we boycott! Rally everyone! Storm the tower! *starts chanting* Take them down! Take them...everybody, everybody, come on now *still chanting alone* Take them down! Take them down!

Sammy: Who the - Pete Meyers?!

Pete:...no. No, uh, it's - oh hey guys I didn't see you broadcasting there.

Ben: Whatever, Pete. Why don't you put your leash back on and go hang out with Howard Ford Beauregard.

Pete: The third! I don't know why you don't acknowledge it. It's important, it's part of the name. And... I can do what I want.

Sammy: Let it go, buddy. Uh, you were saying about the guest...

Pete: Shows you! He ain't even here, anyway.

Ben: Oh,right. What was I thinking? Vampires hate the sun, right? Of course he wouldn't be here, my bad.

Pete: Right! I mean...no- wha? No! Vampires? What?

Ben: Exactly! You heard it here folks! Another King Falls AM exclusive. Howard Beauregard's own gardener confirms -

Pete: Sensationalist liberal media! (voice fades as he walks away) I am never watching you broadcast in the park ...

Ben: GOOD!

Sammy: Hey, Ben?

Ben: Oh, uh, right right. Uh, you aren't gonna believe this, Sammy. Seriously, we are in for a real treat. Joining us right after this commercial break? I'm literally shaking look at this.

Sammy: Alright, enough suspense Ben! Reel in this fish. Also, please say it's Merv the station owner.

Ben: Come on, Sammy, I can produce guests. I can't produce miracles.

Sammy: Worth a shot.

Ben: Good luck with that. But, uh, anyway, right after the break - King Falls very own *mimics drum rolls* RICH MCGUFF FROM RICH MCGUFF'S LEATHER BOUND BOOKS.

Sammy: ... you just used that much build up -

Ben: Dude, you have no idea! Rich McGuff does not come out in public. He's like King Fall's own Howard Hughes. I can count on one hand how many times I've actually seen him in my life time.

Sammy: And you got him?! That is pretty impressive, Ben.I guess.

Ben: They say he has the essence of a 1980's Tom Selleck. And the libido of well, uh... like uh, a young Tom Selleck.

Sammy: So one could say he's the young Tom Selleck of leather bound books?

Ben: Oh man he's gonna love that! Can I tell him, do you mind?

Sammy: But does he have the mustache?

Ben: Sammy... if you've ever seen a more elegant mustache than Rich's? Well, *scoffs* then, you're lying. Because it's magnificent. Spellbinding, even.

Sammy: Right after the break?

Ben: After the break!

Sammy: That was your cue to go to break, Ben.

Ben: Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about that glorious, sculpted facial hair. You know I couldn't grow a mustache like that in a million years...

(sounds of crowd cheering and clapping suddenly)

Sammy: We are on schedule, right?

Announcer over loud speaker: King Falls Own... Dusty Reynolds!

Ben: We are - uh - you know what? Let's use the power of technology to jump over to the main stage where Dusty Reynolds is about to perform. He can sing us to break!

Sammy: Sounds like a plan.

Ben: King Falls, we'll be back live from the Best Small Town America celebration in Main Street park right after the smooth sounds of my personal friend, Dusty.

Dusty: *starts strumming guitar* *in country voice* ♪Javier the pool boy, you have ruined my life. You used to clean my filters now you're banging my wife. Oh, Javier, hey Javier... I hate you. Donald Trump said you should go back where you came from. And after seeing you with my girl I don't think he's so dumb. Hey Javier oh Javier... I hate you. Wish that you would just disappear! Oh man I wish you were dead. And when I think of you and Gloria I wanna put a gun to my head. Oh Javier, hey Javierrrrr. I (censored) hate you ♪ *crowd cheers*

Ben: Oh, uh- sorry about that. Here's a word from our sponsors.

*Upbeat Piano music*

Hi. I'm Sammy Stevens from 660 on the radio dial. The kind folks at the Chamber of Commerce know that our elderly friends at the King Falls Geriatric Center can't make it down today. Especially after the handicap ramp closures... so please enjoy an afternoon with your favorite King Fall's ivory tickler, Ed Shambley. Ed is graciously taking the day off from Nolan's Drugstore to come play from his self released smash, "Peanuckle Shuffle". From what I've heard there's no better way to get ride of the colostomy bag blues. From "Uh-oh I Can't Get Pp" to " I Think My Grandson Stole My Savings Bond" Ed Shambley will keep the King Falls Geriatric Center rocking, rolling, and mall strolling to the hits. Happy 7th Best Town Small in America, ladies and gents.

Sammy: Welcome back to King Falls that's 660 on the AM dial. We've got a -

Emily: Hi, Ben! Hi, Sammy!

Ben: Hi, Emily!

Sammy: Hi, Emily! Come on up here. The lovely Miss Emily Potter is making her way up to join us. *quietly* Hey Ben are you sure she's gonna be okay to be around Rich McGuff?

Ben: Oh, good point. I'll make this quick.

Emily: Hi, guys! Are you live?

Sammy: We are live. How are you doing today, Emily?

Emily: Oh, I'm just having a great time! These kind of things is exactly why I love King Falls so much. It really is the best small town in america.

Ben: See, Sammy?

Sammy: Well now I'm sold.

Emily: Well I just wanted to tell you two hi and good luck with your special daytime show today! I hope it goes swimmingly.

Ben: *clearly flusted* Aw, thanks, Emily.It's really sweet of you..,.

Emily: Don't mention it. I'm just happy I don't have to stay up so late to talk to you.

Sammy: *softly* Ohhhhhhh.

Emily: Uh, I - I mean, the show. To listen to the show. I-I love you guys. I, well, I mean - I love, uh, the show. I love the show, and you guys.

Ben: I'm happy to hear your voice too, Emily.

Emily: Sooooo, after your broadcast, do you maybe wanna come to Frickards with me?

Ben: YES. Wait- what?

Emily: See, Greg Frickard came by the library booth earlier and asked if I'd like to have dinner after everything is wrapped up at the ceremony. Annnnnd I was hoping you'd come with me?

Ben: That son of a...Frickard.

Emily: But, y-you don't have to. If you don't want to...

Ben: Oh! I mean, of course I do! It's just...a frog place? I don't really -

Sammy: It's not a conflict of interest, Ben. You know that Granny Frickard's Froggery is just one of our amazing SPONSORS here.

Ben: *dryly, very monotone* It's a delicious place to eat. Put's some pep in my step and... some hop in my heart.

Emily: So... is that a yes? I...really can't tell. Are you alright?

Ben: I'd love to go with you. Anywhere. Even a -

Sammy: Ahem.

Ben: ... the best froggery this side of saddle creek.

Emily: Great! So, it's a date! Just come find me after the show. Bye, Sammy. Bye, Ben!

Ben: Did she say date? She said date, right?

Sammy: It sounded like she invited you to a date.

Ben:... Frickard.

Sammy: Ben, I don't wanna alarm you, but there is a heavily mustachioed gentleman walking up behind you.

Ben: Oooohohoho! Oh man, oh man. Okay, okay. King Falls I am so proud to introduce Mr -

Ernie: *heavy typical New York mobster accent* Heyyyy ya Ben. Hows yous guys doin?

Ben: Ernie Salcedo?

Ernie: From Ernie's mufflers! How ya doin, pally?

Ben: I...uh...

Sammy: Hi, Ernie! Uh, nice to meet ya, sir.

Ernie: Nice to make your acquiescence or..what have yous, Sammy.

Ben: I'm sorry, Ernie, we were just uh expecting -

Ernie: Rich McGuff! Yeah, he couldn't make it down to the thing, eh, he had some little thing to do somewheres else.

Ben: Uh, why are you here?

Ernie: Ohhhh, Rich and I go way back to this one thing that we did for this one guy. Long time ago.

Sammy: Uh-huh

Ernie: It's a long story you might say. I can't really get all into the encompassing details and what not. Long story short, Rich can't make it. He's, uh, a little tied up/

Ben: *nervously high voice* Like actually tied up?

Ernie: You're a funny guy, Benny.

Ben: *same high voice* Uh-huh

Ernie: It's a compliment. Some cultures, when a compliment is paid, the complimented might give some appreciation back...

Ben: I - uh- th-thank you so much Mr. Salcedo... do you want actual money? I-I don't have my wallet on me, but -

Ernie: Haaaa, this guy. You gotta watch him! He's a regular Don Rickles.

Ben: Ha... is that a compliment?

Ernie: You're almost too funny, Benny...alomst.

Ben: Uh, uh. Th - uh, thank you, Ernie. You - you are a very large...broad shouldered...intimidating man.

Ernie: You're a sweet kid.

Sammy: Well, thanks for letting us know, Ernie. Ernie from Ernie's Mufflers, ladies and gentlemen. For all your... muffler needs?

Ernie: No problem. I gotta go see a guy about a thing anyway. You stay funny. Benny.

Ben: *whispering* Is he gone? Please tell me he's gone.

Sammy: Are you okay over there, Ben?

Ben: He didn't leave a fish anywhere, did he?

Sammy: He's gone, Ben. I think your safe?

Ben: Jesus...

Sammy: So, no Rich McGuff?

Ben: I forgot after running into the Godfather - uh, Godfather of muffler... things?

Sammy: I think the term your looking for is "whosies whatsies"

Ben: I really wanted to talk to Rich McGuff too DAMMIT.

Sammy: Well, let's just hope that Rich is alright. Maybe you can snag him for the 8th annual next year, Ben.

Ben: Don't get cocky about it, man. There's no guarantees we'll get it again.

Sammy: Something tells me that it's a lock...

Ben: Phew! Okay...I'm okay, folks! Uh, Sammy? Uh, you better go get ready to announce -

Sammy: *monotone* Mayor Grisham.

Ben: Yeah, but try to have some excitement in your voice? That'd really sell it. Like you actually like the guy.

Grisham: How ya doin fellas? This is a fine day. How's your mom, Ben?

Ben: Oh man! Such a great day to be part of King Falls, mayor! Thanks for inviting us to host the uh -

Grisham: Yeah...that wasn't my call. It was originally Storm Sanders, but since he's-

Sammy: Please say off the reservation -

Grisham: That's completely culturally insensitive, Sammy! Have some tact. Since Storm is....ummm, not available to us today...the Chamber of Commerce insisted we go with...you.

Sammy: Believe me, Mayor, we are just as thrilled about this as you are.

Grisham: Right. I'll see you up on that stage, Sammy. Please make it short and sweet. I've got an announcement to make.

Sammy: Oh, so I should totally throw away the 8 pages of compliments I wrote for ya. Oh, all that hard work right down the drain.

Grisham: Yeah yeah yeah, good stuff, Stevens.

Ben: Uh, Mayor, before you go, would you mind giving the listeners at home a sneak peak of your announcement? I mean, most of the town is here and they'll hear it live. Could be a cool little thing for the station.

Grishman: You know what, Ben? I think that's a good idea. A great idea, even. You think this might help mend this mutually hurting bridge between King Falls AM and myself?

Sammy: Mayor? We'd love to get the scoop if you're willing to give it to us.

Grishman: So, we're good?

Ben: Water under the infrastructurally unsafe bridge. Sammy?

Sammy: Mayor, if you're happy, we're happy.

Grisham: That's the spirit!

Ben: So, Mayor Grisham, after the coronation in just a few short minutes, you're making an announcement?

Grisham: Absolutely, Ben. After today's crowning achievement of King Falls being the best small town in america and for the 7th year in a row, I don't think there's a better time to let the citizens of this wonderful town know that I'll be running, once again, for mayor in 2016.

Ben: Oh, wow! This is big news! This is a real scoop! This is -

Sammy: A load of horse (censored) !

Ben: WHAT?

Grisham: Excuse me?! Stevens?!

Ben: Uh *laughs nerviously* uh, what Sammy meant to say is that -

Sammy: *matterly of factly* Is that this is such a load of -

Ben: Sammy!

Grisham: Jesus (censored) Christ, are you serious right now, Sammy? Are we on the air, Ben? Alright, you guys are "Punking" me, right?

Ben: Uh, w-w-we are... live.

Sammy: So, mayor Grisham, you're announcing your bid for the seat you already hold at the town wide celebration that, let's face it, is far from legit.

Grisham: Are you- are you doing this right now? What happened to water under the bridge?

Sammy: That bridge literally collapsed under the load of manure you are planning on dumping on to it. Do you announce something special like this at every made up King Falls event, or is this just something special?

Grisham: How dare you!

Ben: Mayor *laughs nervously* Sammy's been taking a lot of cold medicine. You know how the old 'tussin makes ya loopy! He doesn't even mean this...

Sammy: What did he announce last year at the sixth annual best small town in america celebration?

Grisham: If you must know, smart ass, we announced the- the uhh -

Ben: *slowly like it's just starting to hit him* He announced the 2.5 million dollar add on to the already newly remolded city hall...

Grisham: I..I'd have to - I'd have to talk to Riley first and get the figures -

Sammy: And what about the fifth annual fest -

Grisham: You know what, we're done here -

Ben: Mayor Grishman announced 20% raises for all the King Falls county government employees.

Grisham: Again - gentlemen, I...I need to speak to Riley - I need to figure out these figures. You- you know it may have happened -

Ben: *sadly and softly* This is a sham...

Grisham: Are you happy, Stevens? Is this what you want? To ruin this town for everyone? Bring your big city conspiracy and your trash talk radio to my town? Are you happy?

Sammy: I think anyone that has this much problem with checks and balances is probably shady and worth looking into.

Grisham: You're a real piece of...work, Stevens!

Sammy: Coming from you? That means absolutely nothing.

Ben: Uhhh, whoa, uhh, I know this probably isn't the best time, but you two gentlemen are needed over at the main stage for the presentation and ribbing cutting.

Grisham: One word about this, Stevens. One utterance of your conspiracy fueled hog wash, and I will... AHEM. Ahem.

Sammy: Oh, I'm sorry, please continue to threaten me live on the radio waves. What was that?

Grisham: Listen up. You listen good. You have you little slice on sensationalized lies with your 12 listeners on AM radio. You stick to the damn facts and go announce King Falls as the best small damn town to live in or, so help me, I will have Sheriff Gunderson drag your ass outta here for preemptively inciting a riot! These people deserve it!

Sammy: And you of course.

Grisham: You're absolutely right. I love my city! Unlike yourself. Do your job for once and I'll do mine. You two disgust me. And don't think I won't write Merv a strongly worded letter after this!

Sammy: Yeah, good luck finding him.

Announcer over loud speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, we have a real treat for you -

Ben: *sighs* Sammy, you should probably go do what ya gotta do...

Sammy: You know that I'm not doing this to - to paint the town in a negative light, right?

Ben: I do! I really do, but... do you know how much this town needs this?

Sammy: I do. And I love this town, I love these people. And maybe knowing the truth behind things is hard, but..I'd like to think it's better than living with the lie of it all. This isn't some BS proclamation by the Chamber of Commerce or a marginalized and power hungry schmuck that makes this town what it is... it's the people. It's the town. That's what makes King Falls great, and they deserve to know that.

Announcer over loud speaker: From King Falls AM, 660 on the radio dial, let's hear some applause out there! Mr. Sammy Stevens from the Sammy and Ben show! (crowd cheering and clapping) Oh, uh, my apologizes, Mr. Mayor,... yes, of course... uh, sl-slight change of plans, ladies and gentlemen. Please welcome back to the stage, Mr. Dusty Reynolds!

Ben: What the?!

Sammy: Oh, I'll be back. POST MY BAIL, BEN!

Ben: Wait, what? Sammy! Uh, oh- okay. That was Sammy leaving. He's heading over to the - yup! He's running up on the stage, there...

Grisham: You're done, Stevens! DONE! I'M GONNA RIP YOUR (CENSORED) HEAD OFF!!!

(Crowd gasping dramatically )

Ben: Oh! Mayor Grisham just punched Sammy in the face! What the - (lots of censoring and fighting coming from the stage) Hey! Oh - oh - okay. Sammy just got- Sammy just- ohhhh. That's a suplex. Pretty sure that was a suplex. Sammy and Grisham are on the ground. This is literally like the end of Lethal Weapon. Except no rain... and neither of these men are proficient in mixed martial arts. (more screaming from crowd) HEY! DON'T! Oh, Mayor Grisham just went for a - a round house kick. And Sammy, nope - that - Sammy didn't even have to duck that was a terrible kick. No! Sammy! No, don't- don't- ooooo. How have they not broken this up? SOMEONE BREAK- SHOULD I BREAK THIS UP? (baby starts crying) Wh-where's Troy?!

Grisham: Someone cut their feed! Cut it! Cut the feed now!

Ben: I'm not even being biased, I think he's just angry Sammy had that headlock on him so long. La-ladies and gentlemen, I better -

Announcer: *nervous laughter* There's just horse-playing, folks. Right? Right guys? (more screaming and commotion from crowd) *Sighs* Somebody get the hose. Dusty! Play your damn song already! Best small town in America, my ass...

Dusty: (singing over crying babies, screaming crowd) ♪ Came up to my trailor when I was out of town, lord he took my smile and turned it upside down. Cause I caught you having sex with a rodeo clown. from the size of his shoes, I just can't compete ♪

(Sirens from police cars pulling up - music fades)

#king falls #king falls am #kfam #make king falls great again #podcast #transcript #18

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