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yanderes-galore · 21 days

Note

I gots more, can you do Yuji (and/or Gojo) with a darling from the real world? Or like he’s self aware?

My favorite way to write self-aware show characters is to write an entity that acts just like them. Similar to an Analog Horror I've seen (Forgot the name but if you want it, I can hunt it down) So for this, that's kinda the plot I'm working with if that's okay. So like... a Creepypasta-like thing if that's fine.

So, the plot is similar to something I've done in the past for both: You buy a DVD of JJK... but something isn't quite right as you soon learn. No plot spoilers here for JJK. Purely an AU.

Feedback is appreciated as long as it's constructive! I could probably do this with other characters if I was given ideas. Both ideas start the same but begin to differ later.

Yandere Self-Aware! Yuji Itadori + Satoru Gojo

(Analog AU - An Experimental Name?)

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, "Self-Aware" yandere, Analog AU (?), Stalking, Overprotective behavior, Unrequited feelings, Delusional behavior, Kidnapping, Possessive behavior, Forced relationship.

Yuji Itadori

Yuji Itadori is your favorite character from Jujutsu Kaisen.

There's just something about his resolve and ability to find happiness despite his situation that makes you fond of him.

It's all harmless fun for you, everyone has a favorite character after all.

Although... unlike most... it appears you've been caught in something you weren't expecting.

The DVD you bought off online didn't have the best packaging... but DVDs that aren't official tend to have bootleg packaging.

You just couldn't afford a streaming service and wanted to binge the two seasons of JJK they have out.

It seemed harmless enough, who hasn't pirated or purchased a pirated DVD at some point without knowing.

Even when you watched the DVD, everything seemed the same.

You were completely unaware of something lurking deep within.

This entity, now given the name Yuji Itadori, was awoken and given life when you used the DVD.

It could sense your fondness for the character and took the likeness of him.

Everything from appearance, personality, and mannerisms was copied as the entity took a new life.

Eventually they felt they were the character and felt every bit of fondness you had for them.

That's how "Yuji Itadori" came into being.

It's when this transfer is complete that things start to alter.

It's like the DVD opens an alternate universe, one where the events of JJK are part of their very own world.

Yuji originally believed everything was real.

This was his life... until he felt your presence.

At first he's in denial, not liking the idea of being trapped somewhere.

But then he sees you.

You are someone he can't reach, someone beyond a screen he can only look at.

While you watch the events of JJK play out on your little DVD, Yuji watches you.

It's a bit ironic, until he grows strong enough and more aware, the show character watches you just as invested as you are.

Yuji can't help but fall into a delusional sense of love and care for you.

He can't help but be excited whenever he catches glimpses of you.

His obsession is vague, as he is just now learning about his love for you.

He feels he wants to protect you, yet expresses frustration when he can only watch you from a clear barrier.

You can pick up on his self-aware behavior, things like glances, waves, and times where he says your name when other characters aren't looking.

The change is slow for him, but quick for you.

His feelings and growth continues through the episodes, the time feeling like months or years for him but hours for you.

Half way through the show you notice Yuji's behavior.

You're frightened at first, but maybe a morbid curiosity fills you?

This begins with you two properly communicating.

Certain plot points are paused or lengthened all so Yuji can speak with you.

It's so strange... like you're actually speaking to a human being.

Yuji is always very affectionate when speaking with you.

Often calling you nicknames, asking questions, and providing comfort after long days.

You see him as your little digital companion, while Yuji sees you as a lot more than that.

He's the only one aware of you, the other characters seem more like puppets to Yuji so he can play a story for you.

He likes seeing you happy and does whatever he can to make you smile.

Darker behavior manifests later as Yuji begins to realize he... isn't a big part of your life.

Through the screen he can see you have friends, family, everything.

You're the biggest part of his world, but he's the smallest part of yours.

As this DVD has supernatural capabilities (clearly), perhaps Yuji would pull you into his world once he fears he can lose you.

The next time you get to watch JJK, Yuji greets you.

"Hey! I've been preparing a surprise for you..."

Curious, you go to ask what it is...

Only to pass out.

By the time you wake up, you're not in your world anymore.

You wake up in a dorm, clearly not your room.

As you wake up, you jump back when you see Yuji kneeling beside you.

"Great! It did work!" He chirps happily, eyes closed with a smile on his face.

You go to ask what happened, only for Yuji to hold your hands.

"I brought you to my world! You mean a lot to me... plus, here I can shape this world to anything you want."

Yuji pulls you closer, closer to the point you can see a red glint in his eyes.

"I love you... and I just want to make you happy." Yuji vows, the confession innocent despite the situation.

"We'll make this our own little world."

"I want to go home!" You cry, confusing Yuji.

"Why would you ever want to leave...?"

Yuji asks, pulling you close.

"You'll be so happy here..." Yuji murmurs, eyes giving off a dull red glow.

"You won't ever want to leave... you won't ever leave me again."

From that point on, you live in an artificial world.

You and Yuji are the only ones "real" here.

Now he's the most important thing in your life, just like you are to him.

Satoru Gojo

Satoru Gojo is your favorite character from Jujutsu Kaisen.

There's just something about his playful/cocky attitude and perhaps even his looks that makes you fond of him.

It's all harmless fun for you, everyone has a favorite character after all.

Although... unlike most... it appears you've been caught in something you weren't expecting.

The DVD you bought online didn't have the best packaging... but DVDs that aren't official tend to have bootleg packaging.

You just couldn't afford a streaming service and wanted to binge the two seasons of JJK they have out.

It seemed harmless enough, who hasn't pirated or purchased a pirated DVD at some point without knowing.

Even when you watched the DVD, everything seemed the same.

You were completely unaware of something lurking deep within.

This entity, now given the name Satoru Gojo, was awoken and given life when you used the DVD.

It could sense your fondness for the character and took the likeness of him.

Everything from appearance, personality, and mannerisms was copied as the entity took a new life.

Eventually they felt they were the character and felt every bit of fondness you had for them.

That's how "Satoru Gojo" came into being.

It's when this transfer is complete that things start to alter.

It's like the DVD opens an alternate universe, one where the events of JJK are part of their very own world.

Due to how Gojo is, he'll probably learn that his world isn't real faster than Yuji.

He'll learn that things aren't as they seem, that those around him are merely puppets for him to use.

At first he's a bit hurt... yet now he's curious.

He only gets more intrigued when he learns of your presence.

While you watch him through the screen, he watches you.

You always look so happy when he plays his part on screen, playing his role through the events of his world.

Gojo still plays along, even as he grows increasingly obsessive about you.

He just knows you two are different.

It only annoys him when he's kept from you by a clear barrier, looking at you through your TV or monitor as you watch him.

He's strong... but not strong enough to have you, it seems.

To him, it feels like his obsession has gone on for years.

For you? It feels like hours.

You're just happy to watch one of your favorite shows...

Completely unaware of your favorite character fantasizing about finally meeting you.

That is until Gojo decides enough is enough... and makes his presence known.

"Oi! Can you hear me?"

He makes contact with you by pausing events in the story and waving to the screen.

Maybe similar to the Yuji portion you're overcome with morbid curiosity more than fear.

Which leads to you feeding into Gojo's obsession by speaking with him.

Due to having his world under his control, Gojo's capable of pausing or slowing down events in the story to speak with you.

He alters things to entertain you and often speaks to you.

You end up spending more time speaking to him than watching the show normally.

You learn that Gojo is very playful with you.

He often waves, makes heart shapes with his hands, and winks at you.

He likes to say your name to mess with you and does his best to press himself closer to the screen so you can touch it.

It disturbs you that the screen is often... warm when he touches it.

Gojo's usually always playful with you until he begins to realize the truth.

He loves you, more than anything he loves you.

His little world would feel lonely without you.

His whole purpose is to entertain you, to make a good story for you and keep you company.

He lives for you.

Yet he notices you have others around you...

You have friends, family, perhaps even a lover.

He's only a little part of your life... and it upsets him greatly.

Gojo tries to hide his hurt from you as he watches you chat with others.

He wants nothing more than to have you all to himself in this little world of his...

When he grows stronger... he can.

It's ironic for Gojo to need to be "stronger".

In his world, he's the strongest.

Yet he takes time to grow more in order to have you.

He won't have to worry about your lover or anyone afterwards.

"I have something to show you~!"

His voice is in a purr when you go to speak with him again.

"Here's my gift... you know I just want to make you happy..."

You begin to feel woozy, slumping over.

"You know I just want to make you mine."

By the time you wake up, you're in a room you don't recognize.

Only for Gojo to show up with a grin.

"Yo!" He chirps, ignoring the fear in your eyes. "I did pretty good, right? You're in my world now... but I can change anything I want to make it the best for you."

He's so giddy about having you beside him.

In here, he doesn't have to worry about those close to you.

He has everything under control... and you in his arms.

"What's with the look? Come on, where's my hug?" He pouts, pulling you against him even if you struggle.

"You'll get used to it..." Gojo whispers, a kiss placed on your forehead.

"I exist to please you..." Gojo whispers, kissing your cheek.

"This is our world now... I'll never let you leave me now that I've got you."

#yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere jjk #yandere self-aware au #yandere yuji itadori #yandere gojo satoru #yandere analog au

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miuszn · 1 year

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ellie x reader where ellie comes home after patrol (or after college class if u like modern!ellie more) and sees you wearing one of her shirts with only panties underneath and she gets a littleee feral 🥹

i’m so into you

SETTING : jackson ( canon universe before joel’s death , or not , up to u !! )

RATING : 18+

WC : 2203

WARNINGS : overstimulation , kinda vanilla ? , fingering ( r!recieving ) , oral ( r!recieving ) , top!ellie , she calls u princess , not proofread

NOTES : hii .. so sorry this took so long !! pls forgive me i’ve been so busy 🥹🫶 the end is a liiiiittle bit half assed bc i was trying rlly hard to finish this and i feel like i’m gonna have writers block soon so i was getting out as much as i could before that. so pls forgive me ik the aftercare isn’t too thought out i was trying to come up w stuff i promise but i just couldn’t . anyway . if this was ur request , i hope u enjoy !! i rlly liked this idea i got to writing it right away eheh

— 𓆩♥︎𓆪 —

ellie had a long and tiring day on patrol. it was one of those days she had been unfortunately assigned to one of the areas that had the most infected to clear out, and while it wasn’t a difficult task for her, it was most definitely not something she enjoyed doing either. not only that, but she had to cover for jesse almost immediately after getting back to jackson since he had caught a really bad cold, which meant she was pretty much out the entire day. while this wasn’t something common, it was something that happened every once in a while and it was never enjoyable for her nor for you. of course you understood she had a job to do, but you always dreaded these days where she had more to do than usual.

it was sunset, and you decided to take a quick shower before it got dark. you realized none of your clothes you washed had dried yet, so you decided to just throw on one of ellie’s t-shirts and thought you’d simply figure it out tomorrow. night fell and you started to worry about whether your girlfriend would get back safely, while you knew for sure she’d be fine, there was always that thought in the back of your mind that made you worry. you decided to just watch a movie to get your mind off it and stop worrying about her. you scanned through the collection of dvd’s ellie had stored and wondered how she even managed to get so many. you didn’t think about it too much and grabbed a random one, since you weren’t gonna watch the whole thing anyway, and sat down.

it wasn’t long before ellie finally got home, and you stood up excitedly to greet her as soon as she came through the door. you hugged her and gave her a peck on the cheek, happy that she made it back home safe.

“you were out all day,” you complained, “i missed you so much.”

“m’ sorry babe,” she apologized, “had to cover for jesse. the guy got sick again, i don’t know how the hell he even manages to get sick so often.”

“well, what’s important is you’re here and your safe. i was worried about you, you know?”

“you don’t have to worry about me,” she brushed you off, “i’m fine, see?”

you playfully rolled your eyes and pulled away, that’s when she finally got a good look at you and she realized you were only wearing a t-shirt. her t-shirt. she knew you knew she struggled to control herself whenever she saw you in her clothing, regardless of how many times she might complain about having nothing to wear after you use them all. but you hadn’t thought about that when you just threw it on, in fact, you pretty much completely forgot about all that.

ellie wasn’t sure on wether or not she was gonna make a move, she wasn’t sure if you were in the mood and didn’t want to make thinks awkward. she figured you would just want to spend some time with her after she’d been out all day, and nothing beyond cuddling and some kisses. regardless, she decided to test the waters.

you both sat down back on the couch and continued watching the movie. you gave ellie a short summary of what had happened so far so she would understand what was going on in the movie, but little did you know she wasn’t interested in the movie. her eyes were on you.

a few minutes into the movie, she put her hand on your waist and gently pulled you closer to her, and then rested her hand on your thigh. whew. you loved it when she did little things like that, it turned you on whenever she showed hints of possessiveness no matter how small, and she knew this. that’s exactly why she was doing it. she was trying to see how long it would take for you to crack, how long it would take for you to beg her to touch you. although you felt a little heat from the small gesture, you weren’t aware that was her intention. you didn’t think much of it, as it was something she did often and it might’ve simply been out of habit.

about 10 more minutes passed by and ellie realized that hadn’t been enough. she noticed the goosebumps on your skin from the cold, and saw there was a small blanket on the end of the couch on her left, so she reached and grabbed it.

“you cold?” she asked.

“yeah,” you replied. “not a lot though, it’s fine.”

“we can use this blanket,” she suggested, “it’s kinda small though. wonder how we can share it.”

“maybe.. i can sit on your lap?” you responded, not considering the implications she might get from it. of course, she agreed. now she was one step closer to having you exactly how she wanted you. she let her hands wander around and finally rested them on your waist. she started placing gentle kisses behind your neck and on your shoulders, and you finally caught on to what she was trying to do.

“ellie..”

“hm?” she didn’t stop what she was doing.

in that moment you remembered how much she loves you wearing her shirts. you hadn’t put thought into it when you first put it on, but now it was all starting to make sense “i know what you’re trying to do..” you said.

“n’ what’re you gonna do about it, princess?” she said, playful smirk tugging on her lips. she knows how much you like that nickname. it turns you on, and she knows it. she moved your leg slightly, parting your legs so your cunt would be directly on her leg, the only barrier being her jeans and your panties. held your waist a little tighter and started slightly and slowly moving you back and forth, stimulating your clit through the thin cloth of your panties with the friction of her rubbing you against her leg, causing you to let out a few whimpers and soft moans. while the rough fabric of her jeans rubbing against your clit, your panties providing little protection, felt a little uncomfortable, it was something you could overlook. she kept moving your hips back and forth for a moment before stopping and removing one of her hands from your waist and moving it to your inner thigh. she placed it there for a second, then slowly moved it up your crotch and lightly tugged on your panties.

“may i?”

you nodded, and she swiftly removed them and threw them somewhere on the floor. she teasingly slid a finger along your slit, making you softly moan at the contact of her cold fingers against your warm skin.

“wow, barely touched you n’ you’re already so wet. aren’t you embarassed?”

you bit your lip and looked down, trying to contain

the noises that wanted to escape your mouth. after a few moments of her sliding her finger along your slit to tease you, you started to get fed up and needed more.

“els, please..”

“hm? please what, baby?”

“please.. fuck me already..”

“you’re gonna have to try a lil’ harder than that, pretty girl.” she smirked, and started rubbing circles on your clit. she didn’t want to give you what you wanted immediately, she wanted to have a bit of fun with you first.

“ellie, please, f-fuck.. please fuck me..” you begged.

“hmm.. alright princess, i will.”

she slid a finger inside you and started gently thrusting it in and out of you. she went at a slower pace, and she was doing it on purpose. she loved teasing you, especially when you got all whiney and started begging her to do more. it didn’t take long before you started to get impatient from the small amount of stimulation she was giving you.

“too little..” you blurted out.

“oh?” she poorly pretended to be surprised by your remark. “is it really?”

“y-yes.. please.. more..”

“you sure you want more?” she chuckled. “can you handle it?”

you nodded, just so desperate to feel more. she slid another finger in you and pumped them in and out at a faster pace, curling them to hit your sweet spot causing you to moan louder and more than you previously were. soon enough, she felt your walls clench around her fingers and she knew you were close. she kept thrusting her fingers in and out of you, but started using her free hand to rub circles on your clit, causing you to whine from the overstimulation. she realized this and started to tease you.

“what happened, tough girl? didn’t you say you could handle it?”

“ah.. ellie..” you whined.

“you sound so pretty like this. all whiny n’ such a mess from me touchin’ you. so cute. and no one gets to see you like this except for me.”

“i’m..”

“i know, princess. cum for me.”

and almost on cue, you did. you thought that was it, but she lifted you with ease and laid you down on the couch, discarding the blanket you guys had been sharing until now. you were still sensitive from the orgasm you just had, so you thought ellie was done. but you were far from right. you looked over to your panties that were on the floor thinking you were about to put them back on, but it’s as if she read your mind and said,

“you won’t need those for now.”

you looked at her a little confused.

“what, you think i’m done with you?” she chuckled, getting on the couch and positioning her head between your legs, gently forcing them open. “we’re not done ‘till i say we’re done. got it?”

“w-wait, ellie, i’m still-“

she gave you a long lick to tease you, which caused you to moan.

“sensitive?” she finished your sentence for you. “even better.”

with that, she started to eat you out as if you were her last meal, and she was not being gentle at all. she didn’t give two shits that you were still sensitive. in fact, it turned her on even more hearing your loud moans and heavy breaths, and seeing the small tears that flowed from your eyes due to the overstimulation as she licked you and sucked on your clit mercilessly. she then slid in two fingers, again, continuing to stimulate your clit with her mouth as she pumped her fingers in and out of you at a rapid pace while curling them with every thrust. you felt like you were in heaven, but at the same time, felt like you were in hell. it was a little painful, but you didn’t mind a little bit of pain because it was overshadowed by the pleasure you were feeling. you felt your mind go blank, all you could feel was ellie mercilessly fucking you with her mouth and fingers. at one point you ended up losing track of all the times you came due to the intense feeling and only came to your senses once she was done. she gave you a few moments to cool down, and when you finally snapped back to reality, she was caressing your face and watching closely to make sure you were fine.

“you did so good, baby,” she praised. “was i.. uh.. was i too rough?”

“a little,” you answered honestly, “but it was okay. i loved it.”

“you sure? was it painful at all?”

“a little, but i enjoyed it. i’m fine. don’t worry about it.”

“if i’m ever being too rough, just tell me to stop, ‘kay?” she reminded you, “i don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

“ellie, it’s fine,” you insisted. “what was that all about anyway?”

“well, you know,” she broke eye contact. “i just couldn’t resist you. you look so fucking sexy whenever you wear my clothes. you drive me crazy.”

“i wasn’t really thinking about it when i put it on..” you admitted, “but i’m glad you like it. maybe i’ll steal your clothes more often.”

“i’d be happy having barely any clothes to wear if it means i get to see you wearing mine.”

she helped you off the couch, and insisted on carrying you due to your weak legs even though you’d be able to walk to the bed.

“i think i need another shower..” you said once you looked in the mirror and realized how sweaty you are.

“i can get a warm bath running for you,” ellie offered, “if you want i can bring you some snacks or a book while you’re in there.”

“it’s fine-“

“i insist,” she said. “just relax and lay here until it’s ready, okay? i don’t mind doin’ it. i got you like this anyway.”

“ellie..”

you smiled at her and finally accepted. she never once let you do anything like this yourself, especially not after she had been a little rough with you, she needed to make sure you were fine, and she liked taking care of you. and she might not say it often, but she really loves you.

#arielle writes ୨୧ #arielle’s 18+ ୨୧ #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams fanfic #ellie x reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams #tlou #tlou 2 #tlou x reader #the last of us #the last of us 2 #tlou fanfiction

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foldingfittedsheets · 1 year

Text

I would like now to share with you a story from when I worked at a sex shop. Contrary to popular belief, it really was just like a normal retail gig except I stocked a lot more dildos. But we did get extra comfortable with things like nudity and talking about sex, as you’d imagine. However, there was still limits.

So my manager- let’s call her M- hosted a bowling party for the store. She didn’t have a nice quality camera, so she borrowed one from our coworker, S. Now S was a lovely person but really ditzy.

We went out and had a great time, M taking pictures as the night went on.

Then it was time for M to compile all the pictures for a slideshow to show us all how much fun we had. She loaded them up and got a surprise.

A few days later at work, M and I were stocking DVDs and S came in. She waved cheerily and headed into the back to get settled in and as she did I noticed M looking… stiff. I waited until S was in the back before I asked what was wrong.

“Well,” she said, “You know the camera I borrowed from S?”

I nodded.

“I thought she’d cleared the memory card before she gave it to me, but she didn’t.”

I regarded M with a slight but growing dread.

“At first it was just pictures of us bowling and stuff- but as I was scrolling through there was suddenly a picture of S- naked…”

I paused and slowly said, “I don’t think just seeing S naked would be this disturbing…”

“She was pulling her ass cheeks apart and staring at the camera! With her face and her asshole!”

I started to lose it, burying my head in my arms and shaking with laughter.

“When I told her she forgot to clear the memory, she said she knew! That she didn’t mind me seeing the sexy shoot she’d done with her boyfriend, and didn’t she look hot? Now every time I look at her I see her staring at me, showing me her butthole.”

I was in hysterics at this point, fully crying I was laughing so hard. When S came out of the back room she was completely oblivious to M’s discomfort, just cheerfully counting her till for the closing shift. Throughout the night I’d remember and start laughing again and M would shoot me the knowing look of someone who’s seen their coworkers anus.

#story #funny #ramblies #sex shop #retail #nsfw? idk #ffs foibles

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hanaruri-tunes · 1 year

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Humiliating Leviathan (Levi x reader)

My first try at some smut, so MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. And here are the warnings I could think of: Degradation, crying, masturbation, usage of underwear, usage of sex toys, going down on MC, two dicks (I gotta follow the common agreement that Levi has two dicks haha), snake tongue (again, common agreement), petting, praising

OKAY. I think that's it. Don't hesitate to tell me if I forgot something. I know all those warnings might make it seem hardcore but I promise it's actually quite a cute fic. Subby and pathetic Leviathan is the cutest. PLEASE DON'T HESITATE TO LEAVE COMMENTS please please this is my first try at smut in the obey me fandom (if ever, actually) I would really appreciate the support.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

You knocked on his door three times. No answer. Knowing Leviathan he was either passed out in his bathtub after binge-watching an anime or playing games non-stop... Or he miraculously decided to go out somewhere. Probably to buy some merch from a limited-in-time store that has no official website from which Leviathan can order. Although he could definitely find some second-hand merch online he refused to do that. He would go on and on about how buying second-hand isn't supporting the franchise thus he MUST buy it directly from the source.

Seeing how there was still no answer you decided to go in. Usually his door had a spell on it that would send intruders into another random place in the devildom but he lifted that spell for you specifically. You were the only one who could enter at any time without any disturbance.

As you did so, there was no Leviathan in sight. Not in front of his gaming set-up, not in his bathtub, not passed out on the floor. So he's out, huh? You wonder why he didn't invite you or at least warn you that he'll be out today. Usually, especially if it's for a limited time anime café, you're always the first one invited. Well, you probably shouldn't pry but as you're about to step a foot outside his room... You stop. This is a pretty rare chance to look around his room without him pestering you.

It's not like you'll pry *too* much though. Just a bit, for curiosity's sake. (That was a lie you told yourself.) You inspect his figurines more closely. He's mostly into magical girl shows and moe blob shows. How cute of him. But you've always expected that he might have some secret sexy figurines as well. Or else why would he be so protective of some of the packages he orders from Akuzon? He's usually so unenthusiastic and slow when getting out of his room for breakfast or dinner and yet he rushes to the door when it's for a delivery.

After checking some of his drawers you find the fabrics and materials he uses for his cosplays. It's all mostly different hues of pink since he prefers cosplaying female characters- how cute. At one point you also accidentally come across his underwear in one of his drawers, it's all mostly black with some funky colors mixed in from time to time. He even has one of a limited edition HanaRuri-tan underwear collection.

And just as you think that you've struck gold... it's just some old stuff. Probably from some of his past obsessions. That includes precure dvds, aikatsu cards, manga magazines, et cetera. Again all cute shows mostly targeted to young audiences. Really, you can't see Leviathan as anything else than a completely adorable dork. People often don't get him for his specific tastes and hobby but all you see is a pure little guy who's still in touch with his inner child and who loves mostly light hearted shows. Surely anything he might hide won't probably be even THAT bad. Or even if it is... that's still cute in another way.

After looking in all of his drawers, no sign of any sexy figurine, of any sex toy or even erotic manga... This is way too suspicious. But then again Levi is smart, he probably wouldn't dare hide any of this stuff in his drawers knowing that Lucifer frequently comes to his room begging him to clean it, only to start off doing it by himself before Levi hurriedly joins him and kicks him out. If he had to hide something dirty where would he... ... You look under the bathtub. Nope. Too easy? Then...Reaching for his blanket and sheets inside the bathtub, you raise them, uncovering some sort of trapdoor?You slide it open and there's a huge box inside of it. If you had to guess, he used the same spell as the entrance of his room. Except this one always leads to the same space: the place where his hidden box is, wherever that is.

You pull it out, open it and there it is. Almost all of the stuff you had imagined him hiding was in here. Sexy figurines, erotic doujins, even some sex toys. Two in particular were bigger than the others. Fleshlights... But why two? Looking at it closer one's a smaller size and the other one is bigger. Did he get the size wrong the first time he ordered so now he has two of them? But more than that, there was something you really didn't expect to find here. A pair of panties. *Your* panties. You thought that maybe you had just forgotten it while moving back and forth between the devildom and human world but here they were, in Leviathan's precious box.

In some way this awakened something in you, a strange feeling of amusement while you realized that the cutest and purest guy you knew turned out to be a filthy underwear thief who most likely used it to jerk himself off.As you started to think that, a loud noise came from behind you. It sounded like some object had fallen to the floor- ah. Probably Levi who just came back and dropped his phone after realizing what you were looking at. Quickly, you wiped off the amused smile you had on your face before turning back to face him. You faked a look that was a mix of disappointment and worry.

"Levia-chan..."

The poor guy looked frightened, as if the sky had fallen on his head, as if his life was over. Even that pathetic part of him, you found it just so cute.

"Ah... ah... That- uh. I-"

Not even taking the time to close the door behind him, he dropped on his knees in front of you, lowering his head.

"I can explain! S-So please don't- please don't freak out o-or agh, I mean-"

His heart dropped when you walked past him. "It's over." He thought. The friendship you guys had built was done for. There's no way you would ever love him now or even want to look his way. There's no way a kind, beautiful, strong person like you would ever even spare him a glance. No way an amazing girl as pretty and genuine as you would give a second chance to a gross creepy piece of shit like him.

As the worst possible scenarios started to play in his head, he came back to his senses slightly as he understood that you had just closed the door in order to have more privacy in here. You slid his seat in front of him as he was still on his knees, sat down and crossed your legs, taking on a haughty tone. Almost commanding.

"So? You said you could explain but I don't really see what is possibly left to explain here. It all speaks for itself. All this filthy shit and even two fleshlights weren't enough to satisfy your dick so you just *had* to have a go on my underwear, huh? You slutty thief."

As you said that last bit you flicked his forehead that he was trying so very hard to keep fixated on the ground, but it was almost impossible anyway since you had your bare legs crossed right in front of his eyes. You know Levi loves it when you wear short skirts, it's hard for him to not look, even in a serious situation like this one.

"Agh. Well, uh. Ahh..."

After about twenty seconds during which he couldn't come up with anything plausible or even any attempt at an excuse he started to tear up. Completely lost, he lowered his forehead to the ground, bowing and apologizing profusely.

"I'm- I'm so *hngh* s-sorry *hic* please don't hate me. Y-You're right, I'm a pervert but please, I beg you for forgiveness *hic* at the very least please don't ignore mee- *hnghg*"

You felt chills down your spine. Was it horrible of you? While this little baby thought that his entire life was over just because you might hate him, you were just thinking how fucking cute he sounds when he's crying while genuinely in distress. You were feeling conflicted. One part of you wanted to pat his head and raise it, kiss his cheeks full of tears and caress his back while assuring him that you don't really find him that gross or creepy. In fact finding this dirty side of him made you giddy.

And yet, the other side of you wanted to play around with him a bit more before giving him ultimate bliss.

"Levi... Are you serious my darling?"

You gently pressed your heels on the back of his head as his forehead was still stuck to the ground.

"You really think such a lousy excuse will cut it? You know just how outright creepy this is, right? You went out of your way to steal underwear from me so you could rub it all over your dick and cum in it and yet all you have to say for yourself is just "I'm sorry, please don't hate me"? You'll have to do better than that."

Still sniffling, you could feel Levi taking a deep breath to calm himself down.

"Y-you're right. Crying about it won't solve anything. I know just how much of a disgusting lame little fuck I am, it's already a miracle how someone as beautiful and amazing as you even considered me your friend. I've been blessed a-and so honored to be called that. So please, please give me a second chance Y/N. I'll do anything, really."

You took your heel away from him. Full of expectations on what the two of you were about to do if you played your cards right.

"Anything? No way. That's just empty words."

"It's not! I'll really do anything. I'll even be your b- um. B-Bitch if I have to."

You command him to raise his head up, he does. His eyes and cheeks are still wet from the tears he just shed and his face is all red from embarrassment.

"A bitch, really? So you'll even accept corporal punishment? If I tell you to lay down on your stomach on my lap, you'll do it? You'll let me spank you?"

For a split second you see it his eyes, this little fucker really feels like he'll get a kick out of this. "It's not a punishment at all!" He must be thinking. He would love to be treated so poorly by you. In fact, one of his occasional turn-ons was to imagine you degrading him, insulting how much of a perverted little shit he is.

"I- I'll do it. Anything you want to do to me, I'm fine with it so..."

You lightly tap on your thighs two times, telling him to get on. Obediently, he does... and immediately receives a slap on the ass.

"You're supposed to at least lower your pants idiot. Or else it won't even hurt that much."

"A-Ah, yes."

You saw it again. That glint in his eyes. He's excited and is just so barely managing to not display a shit eating grin on his face.

As soon as he does as you told him to, you spank him again. Harder this time. He lets out a little yelp. And as he does you grab his hair with your other hand to pull him up a bit and whisper into his ear.

"You think I didn't notice that? The corners of your mouth keep rising upwards you fucking pig."

Finally he completely gives up on the façade he is trying so hard to keep and lets out a huge unrestrained grin, the kind he has when you hug or kiss him on the cheek suddenly. Looking dumb and genuine, though this time it looks cuter as he's obviously enjoying the pain you're inflicting on him.

"Aaahh. I-I couldn't hide it after all, you're right Y/N. I'm a dirty fucking pig who even enjoys it when you're being mean to me. Bully me, hit me, spit on me. I don't care, if anything I love it. I'm so sorry for not even being able to be properly punished ahh I'm so so sorry~"

He says while not looking sorry at all. Pretending to ignore his stupid monologue you spank him again.

"Slut."

"Hnghh~"

He shudders and keeps grinning widely.

Only does he get a bit nervous when you decide to pull down his underwear.

"Ah- wait! ACk-"

You spanked him again, this time your hand made direct contact with his skin.

"Shut up you filthy bitch. Isn't that what you promised? You even said that you'll be my bitch so that's just what you are right now."

Rapidly the nervousness he had displayed a second ago dissipated.

"Ahhh~ y-yes, I'm your bitch. You can use me whoever you want, I'll even drink your spit if you ask me to ehehe- OW-"

"Quiet. Or- No. Actually, keep moaning. It's cute."

"Ehehe I'm sooo happy you said I'm cute Y/N."

"Master."

"Master~ ehehe..."

He was really digging this roleplay type of set-up you had invented. But while he thought you weren't performing and really wanted to punish him, you on the other hand were truly aware that this is all a sham from your part just to turn him on.

As you continued to spank him a couple more times, you noticed something odd. It wasn't that you felt poking against the side of your thighs since you had fully expected him to get a hard-on. It was that the poking sensation was double.

"... Levi, get up for a second."

"Um, w-wouldn't it be better to continue to punish me?"

Another slap made him yelp.

"Don't be difficult."

And so he did, and you finally realized why he owned two fleshlights. It wasn't that he had the size wrong and had to order a second one, it was that he has two dicks. One on top of another on his crotch, with a pair of balls for each. You can't help but wonder just how much more sperm he can produce than an average "person."

As you closely observe his two rods, Levi can't help but squirm under your gaze. Elated at the amount of attention and your focus on his private parts as his pants and underwear are now out of the way.

"It's weird isn't it? I'm so fucking gross that even my genitalia isn't normal. I'm impressed you can even look at it directly haha."

Silently, you keep staring. Utterly turned on by the many ways you could use this part of him when you'll inevitably fuck eachother. Seeing how you're keeping quiet, Levi keeps degrading himself, obviously wanting the same treatment from you.

"I mean what kind of weird monstruous fuck would have two dicks, right? S-So you can tell me, tell me just how fucking gross and creepy it is..."

He keeps smiling, his face flushed by the titillating humiliation he's feeling by having his cocks out in front of you, the girl he loves the most in the world. So you decide to humor him a bit.

"Hmm... So you constantly hide these? Is it why you always try to wear baggy pants? So people won't notice how much of a creepy fuck you are."

"Y-yeah haha. T-Tell me more..."

He's so docile and pathetic, you can't help but strive for more.

"No. That's enough. Even after a couple of seconds looking at it, it makes me sick of it. I'm bored. Won't you show me how you play with them when I'm not around?"

Leviathan's eyes light up at your suggestion. He can't believe a day would come when you or anyone for that matter would ask him to masturbate in front of them.

"R-Really? You wanna see that?"

"Well, you don't want me to be bored right? And you really reaaaally want my forgiveness for being a gross fuck."

Excited yet mortified, Leviathan takes two of the fleshlights and rummaging through the box, he finds some lube. You watch him start off by filling the two holes with lube, all while both of his dicks are still erect from earlier. You're honestly still amazed at how they look.

Just before Levi sticks his first cock into one of the fleshlights you get an idea.

"Wait a sec. Hand it over."

Obediently, he hands the sextoy over. You spit into it, your saliva mixing with the lube and you give it back.

"Here. Hopefully it'll enhance the experience?"

"Ah- S-shit! Had I known I wouldn't have used the lube at all..."

He looks down, disappointed but still ecstatic. He carefully places the tip of his shaft on the entrance of the toy and slowly starts pushing it in, his dick opening up the walls of the toy as he shudders from the sensation and your piercing gaze. He jerks himself off like that for a little while before you ask him if he's not going to play with his second shaft.

"Well... I can either use the other toy or... I can show you how I do it with your panties..." Seeing how silent you are he retracts his statement. "-JUUST kidding ahaha it's already gross enough to see me jerk myself off so disgustingly with a sex toy, n-no one would like to see their own clothing used like that..."

You smile, uncrossing your legs and leaning in.

"No, that's a good point. Show me how you've been using my underwear all this time you dirty fuck."

"A-ah! Yes... ahaha~"

Taking your panties carefully, he wraps it on his other dick and starts pumping it with his free hand. As he does, he starts explaining.

"A-at first, I would only sniff them but I couldn't resist the urge to use them like this. And now that I've used them too much your sweet smell has completely been overwritten by my disgusting stench so there's no use sniffing it anymore ehehe. That's so fucking creepy isn't? I-I'm such a creepy bastard."

There he goes again, degrading himself while expecting a follow up from you. But you give him none of that this time. Instead, you look at him with anticipation and give him a challenge.

"If you do a good job of putting on a show for me I'll let you go down on me."

The air surrounding him turned to a deep purple as he took on his demon form, his scaly tail wagging around like the one of a dog's. Then he started to pant like a pup as well, elated by your suggestion.

"Ah. Ahh. N-no way? Seriously?! I'll do it, I'll seriously do it. So please watch closely!"

All this time he was on his knees, but now he stood up, making sure you have a close look at his dicks. They were right there in front of your face and you had to hold yourself back from taking one of them into your mouth. He kept mumbling and stammering some intelligible stuff, but you're pretty sure it was something along the lines of "I'll do it" and "look at me."

As he was getting close to release, you could feel him lose himself in the pleasure as his knees looked like they were about to fold from the lack of strength he was putting into them. Probably not used to jerking off standing up, he most likely does it either sitting or lying down like most people. In an effort to keep him standing in front of you, you placed your hand on one of his knees then slowly brought it up, caressing his thighs.

"Do your best to stay standing~ I'll be disappointed if you fall."

"Ah! Yes, of course!"

A literal couple of seconds later, the fleshlight was leaking of his cum and your stolen panties were dripping with his seed. Not only was the quantity overkill but the texture and thickness of the liquid looked quite rich. It was like warm condensed milk. As if on instinct, you placed one of your hands under the dripping liquid, allowing a couple of droplets to land on the palm of your hand.

"Y-Y/N??"

You lick a droplet off, tasting it. Seeing you do that, Levi's knees finally give in and he falls to the ground again, looking at your lips and mouth closely while wagging his tail, overly fixated on how your mouth moves while your tongue is probably pressing those drops of *his* cum on the walls and ceiling of your mouth. Savoring it.

Despite it looking like condensed milk it tastes more like a nectar, sweet and unnaturally good. Is it a special characteristic for a demon's cum to taste sweet and good? Maybe it's to push each other to fall into lust... makes sense. Delicious cum would easily push demons or humans alike to fall deeper into the sin of lust.

"W-wah... I can't believe I just saw you do that. Am I in heaven? N-no that sort of erotic scene would never happen in heaven. Aha I'm so glad I'm a demon and that we're in the devildom..."

Satisfied, you open your legs and raise your skirt.

"It tasted pretty good, surprisingly. But I'm sorry to say mine probably won't taste as good as yours."

Levi crawls towards you like an obedient puppy. He closely looks at the small stain that had formed on your underwear due to his performance. He feels like one grateful and lucky bastard that you're allowing him to do that to you. Frozen for a bit by the sight, he drools slightly before snapping out of it and placing his hands on the side of your underwear. Sliding it down as the stain leaves a bead of your warm liquid behind. Levi looks at it stretch and break as he pulls the panties further down, up to your ankles. You get your feet out of them and kick them to the other side of the room, allowing yourself to open your legs better than if they had stayed around your ankles.

Placing your hand on his head, you gently push him towards you and pet his head.

"Will you start or are you too busy drooling?"

Not making himself be begged any further. He starts by so very gently kissing your clit, it's so soft that you can barely feel it. He wraps his hands around your thighs, preparing himself to eat you out. He's so adorable. As he sticks his tongue out you notice how he has the tongue of a snake. Not that you hadn't noticed before, he would try to hide it from you at first but when you told him that it was so unique and cool he wouldn't try to keep it away from you anymore, boldly opening his mouth when he would yawn or when he was complaining about something. Now there he was using his devious tongue on your sweet spot.

He was greedily tasting you, it made you wonder if you actually tasted as good as he was making it seem. Though you're pretty sure you don't have enchanted cum like demons do. He would sink his fingers into the soft skin of your thighs, feeling you up, probably wishing that you'll let him hump your thighs next if he does a good job at making you feel good. You start to mewl and as you do, you can feel his tongue double down on his efforts, desperate to make you feel better just so he can hear you whimper and cry out his name.

You look down, a bit overwhelmed at how good his tongue is at exploring your insides. You see him looking up at you expectantly, a happy glint in his eyes, full of love for you. It's funny how one moment he begs you to degrade him and the next he asks for praise with his shiny eyes. Appreciative of his efforts, you place one of your hands on his cheek, caressing it with your thumb.

"Good boy Levi."

He wags his tail and his eyes light up some more as he hardens his tongue, pushing it further than you thought he could. You let out another whimper, this time mixing in his name. And as you do, you realize how close you are to climax. You grab his horns and cross your legs around his head, trapping him in front of your pretty pussy. Not that he minds, in fact he wouldn't like it any other way. Feeling you come while you call out his name some more, he suckles on your juices, gladly letting it spread all over his tongue before swallowing it all.

As you let him go, he rests his head on your right thigh, his cheek against your bare skin. He keeps looking up at you in awe at how pretty your face looks just after you've come. He rubs his cheek against your thigh hoping to get your attention back at him.

"Did I do a good job? I can um, I can do other things as well~ Oh if the idea of taking me back as a friend immediately is too gross for you I can keep being your fucktoy for the time being ehehe..."

You smile at him kindly and scratch him under the chin. He wags his tail again and displays his signature wide grin. His laugh is so cute. As he did a good job you figure it's time to stop the charade and let him have a real go at you.

"I wasn't really mad at you by the way."

He lifts his head up from your thigh, eyes wide open.

"Huh?"

"I was just fucking with you, I'm not grossed out or anything. You're still my cute little Levia-chan."

You pat him on the head. His eyes well up in tears from relief.

"R-Really? You won't abandon me?"

"No baby, I just thought this was the perfect excuse to push you to do dirty stuff for me. You're not mad right?"

Leviathan jumps into your arms, crying.

"I'm so grateful that a perfect girl like you would choose *me* to make you feel good. H-Had you not forgiven me, I would even be okay with being your sex slave if you'd like to."

"Don't be stupid, I'll let you be my one and only boyfriend. What about that?"

Levi lets you go, then while still grabbing your shoulders he looks at you, his eyes full of hope.

"Really? You'd allow me? You would take a lame fuck like me as your boyfriend?"

You pull him back in, kissing him on the cheek, near the corner of his lips.

"Don't say that. You're my cute little baby boy. Everyone has an ugly and filthy side to them, but beyond that you're a sweet cutiepie who watches magical girl shows, sews cosplays and easily cries at any sad scene in an anime. I mean, look at me, I just tricked you into thinking that I find you gross and pushed you to jerk off then suck me off. Isn't that objectively pretty terrible of me?"

Levi stays silent for a while before you can feel his two dicks poking at your stomach and pussy.

"N-Now that I know you weren't mad, that was probably one of the best moments of my life."

"Perv."

You kiss him again.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Was initially planning on making them fuck at the end but it got too long. Though I'm not against making a part two if people like it ahah. AGAIN please don't hesitate to comment, I would love to read your thoughts!

#obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me smut #om! leviathan #leviathan avatar of envy #leviathan smut #leviathan x reader #leviathan x y/n #leviathan x mc #hanaruri writes

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lezzball · 15 days

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Diana Taurasi sleepover headcanons

(Completely SFW!! I just wanted to use that picture to get your attention 😇)

(That picture is from 2010 so these headcanons are from that era too)

∞ Diana's place is cute enough to be on HGTV. But there's more clutter than you expected

∞ There's art and family pictures on her walls. She has a nice glass case full of old momentos. But she doesn't have any trophies anywhere

∞ Her living room has a DVD shelf and some old game consoles. The coffee table is piled high with lifestyle and sports magazines

∞ She chats with her mom on the phone in Spanish for a few minutes while you thumb through her magazines

∞ Her kitchen cupboards are stocked with unopened bottles of fancy liquor that she doesn't really drink anymore. Her fridge is stocked with hard seltzer and regular seltzer. And her recycling bin is full of empty bottles of fancy wine. She can't cook anything besides cereal, toast, sandwiches, sliced fruit, and coffee. She offers to make all five of those things for you

∞ Her room looks clean but only because she hastily tidied it up while making you wait outside. On her bedside table is a biography of Julius Caesar. There's an old stuffed animal sitting on the bench at the foot of her bed

∞ Her huge walk-in closet resembles a department store with the men's section and women's section all mixed together. There's a glass box displaying watches sitting on top of a locked safe containing even more watches. The shoe situation is reasonable because she stores most of her shoes elsewhere. In the back of the closet is the door to her bathroom. That bathroom contains a lifetime supply of hairspray. By the sink, there's a colorful glass bong she forgot to put away

∞ At dusk, she goes around and checks to make sure all the doors and windows are locked

∞ She'll cuddle up with anyone whether you're just a friend or something more. During the day, she's always on the move and she's larger than life. But as she's sitting by your side at night, you notice she's suddenly very small

∞ If you spend the night at her place, she does not shut up the entire time. She will just keep talking and talking unless you bluntly tell her to be quiet so you can sleep. You need to be assertive about making her be quiet or else she'll keep thinking of things to say

∞ She's an insomniac. She does not sleep all through the night. She just lies there with her eyes closed replaying basketball games in her head. But once she finds the right person to sleep next to, she'll sleep more soundly

∞ She wakes up at 5am and makes coffee every morning. You don't hear her alarm because she wakes up 3 minutes before it goes off and silences it

∞ She makes her bed every morning and neurotically changes her sheets more than necessary. But she can't make her bed this morning because you're sleeping in it

∞ By the time you wake up, she's already showered, dressed, and bunned. And the coffee is cold. She won't reheat your coffee because reheating coffee goes against her values. She insists on taking you to a cafe on the way to the gym

∞ She drives to the cafe and finishes the story she was telling last night right before you fell asleep. You don't remember the first half of the story very well but the conclusion is entertaining

#diana taurasi #wbb #uconn huskies #phoenix mercury #my headcanons

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zeherili-ankhein · 16 days

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Hii!! Just wanted to let you know I very much appreciate your posts about bengali culture and mythology :)

Btw, what other bengali books do you read? I'm big fan of Sukumar Ray (the whole Ray family honestly>>), i also love feluda among other things. I'd love to discuss bengali literature with you <3

First of all thank you so muchh :D

I have always been a fan of literature and mythology so I try to dig up as much as I can hehe

I have read some Chhoto Golpo by Rabindranath Thakur, he's my absolute favourite, my Gurudev. I have the Golpo Guchho, though I haven't complete read all of them till now, I plan to do very soon. Poems I've read a lot I guess I forgot, I know the story of Chokher Bali through movies and stuff, mom won't buy me that now cause I am too young for that she says. I LOVE LOVE LOVE rabindrasangeet trust me.

I have the Raj Kahini by Abanindranath Thakur in my to read list actually, I will read that once I complete the novel series I am reading currently. Cannot forget Khirer Putul, it was actually what my school did in my class 6th fest that was too memorable for me...

Other than that and Abol Tabol – I LITERALLY HAD ALL THE POEMS MEMORIZED AS A TODDLER – till now my bengali literature reach is not very much actually sadly... Though I do keep all my old school books and they have some great poems and stories in them.

But to ACTUALLY read, sadly I would have to get more books, which I plan to do very soon..

I have read the Chander Pahar by Bibhutibhushan Bandyopadhyay (the movie was bad but I did enjoy it as a child) and Aranyak I've only read a bit, it was in my school textbook I loved that and will read the entire thing oneday. but Pather Panchali I've read a bit, in a book called Aam Aatir Bhepu, – it was it also in my school syllabus – though I'd love to read someday, I have watched the movies OFCOURSE.

I have read some of Upendra Kishore Ray Choudhary too, like Banor Rajputro or Tuntunir Golpo. I read his Cheleder Ramayan too (that was the first ever Ramayan I ever read). Gupi Gayen Bagha Bayen, I've only watched the movies.

AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON PANDOB GOYENDA. MY GOD I LOVE THAT SO MUCH. Bilu was my first ever crush ngl lol.. I still love him.

But sadly I haven't read any of them, including Feluda and Byomkesh Bakshi. My knowledge in them only goes till the movies and shows. I watched those ssoftoons animation Pandob Goyenda and Gopal Bhar – ANOTHER THING I ABSOLUTELY ADORE – I still have those DVDS but I broke my laptop (don't ask me but it was funny T_T) so I have to wait now till I can watch them again.

And other than that, I am an ABSOLUTE SUCKER for Thakumar Jhuli, like I love them so much. I can talk about them for hours.

I would love it, if you have some good suggestions for what I should read.

And I would love it even more to be able to talk to someone about Bengali literature and stuff.. even mythology because I am a sucker for that too lol..

#asked and answered #being bengali #bengali literature #bengali culture #rabindranath thakur #shukumar ray #satyajit ray #upendra kishor ray choudhury #bengali music #bengali girl #desiblr #desi tumblr #desi teen #desi tag #desi

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seat-safety-switch · 1 year

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The world is changing now. Soon, it will leave me and all the knowledge I accumulated during my life behind. It's not too late for me to get into the permanent record, though, with this information about a long-lost art of car ownership. I speak, of course, of the car stereo installation.

Nowadays, car stereos are largely an extension of your phone. And why shouldn't they be? Your phone can access any music you desire, conjure up pornographic visions from the ether itself, and tell you how to get out of the corn maze that you and your borderline-sentient 1979 Firebird Formula have gotten stuck in during your latest secret-agent shenanigans. Car manufacturers make terrible stock stereos, and so it just makes sense for them to step aside and turn them into "big screen that phone makes go."

It is for this same reason that, before the ubiquitous smartphone era, we wanted to swap the stereos in our shit-box Hondas. In the late 90s and early 00s, new standards were coming out practically every weekend. You didn't want to be the dope with an AM/FM/Tape combo when it was possible to be the brave technologist who accidentally bought a stereo on sale that only understood uncompressed Mini-Discs and the Diamond Rio 600. You could go to the store and buy a "head unit" (car stereo dweeb speak for "car stereo") and jam it into the dashboard, yourself. Sure, there were semi-professional installers out there, usually working at that very same store. Those installers cost money, though, and surely you can connect between 15 and 200 wires together in a way that doesn't burn your car down, right?

Wiring a stereo wasn't really that hard. It was just one of those death-by-a-thousand-papercuts deals. You pull out the old stereo, a task which ranges between "annoying" and "holy shit I don't think my car will ever go together again." Then, you unplug it from the wiring harness. They call it a wiring harness, because you get whipped by it and still somehow enjoy the experience.

It's at this point that the driveway-installing amateurs are separated from the driveway-installing pros. A smart person gets a little plug-in wiring adapter that translates from the car's wiring to the stereo's wiring. Someone who forgot to buy the little wiring adapter from the stereo store, and doesn't want to go back there because their car is torn into a million pieces, decides to hack and slash, twisting and soldering the car into the stereo permanently. This works too, but it will be a problem in about two weeks, when the MP3-CD player you just spent your paycheque on becomes obsolete, and is replaced by a Tokyo-24-HotSauce-WMV-DVD player.

Now comes the harrowing. You have just made your car's stereo harness much, much longer, and also likely much fatter. You gotta cram that shit back in the hole it came out of, ideally without getting in the way of anything else inside the dashboard. This is the point at which you must decide whether you will spend eight more hours routing wires, potentially re-doing the wiring work you just completed, or explain to your significant other that the heater controls only go two-thirds of the way to "cool" now. You will pass through this crucible and emerge a stronger, angrier person. You will have opinions on electrical tape for the first time in your life. Your neighbours will call the cops to have you killed after you swear loudly enough to wake their babies. The cops will laugh as you nearly pass out from heat exhaustion underneath your dashboard.

And in the end, you will be able to play an MP3 file from a burned CD. Congratulations. It was all worth it, until you go over a slight bump and the damn thing skips a bunch. I hear the new ones on the shelves now have a bigger anti-skip buffer. And those stock speakers, well, they sound like shit, now that you have this fancy new stereo blaring 64kbps Napster rips through it. Maybe pick up a new amplifier while you're at it, and an upgraded alternator to handle all that new current demand, and...

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mur-art · 5 months

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Oooo, you have Jefferson hcs? I'd love to hear them if you're comfortable with that (not forced)

I definitely haven’t thought about this too much /s

TL;DR I feel like he’d be a great one-off character for the Table purely for comedic value. Dude is pathetic and his antics and attempts to convince others of his legitimate (totally legitimate, he swears) statehood would be hilarious.

Some art and HCs under the cut.

@freshwolfhell has lots of good Jeff HCs as well! A lot of these are the results of our discussions!

TW Discussion of weed (ofc) and other drugs

I forgot if I posted this one or not; again, credit to @freshwolfhell for inspiring this silly comic.

-As the comic above implies, Jeff is sometimes the definition of political “horseshoe theory”; coming to agree with certain progressive/liberal values not because he understands them or agrees with them, but for his own completely unhinged reasons.

-Dude smokes so much weed. He’s just constantly surrounded by a haze. He also struggles with addictions to some harder drugs.

-He’s a hardcore conspiracy theorist. There aren’t many conspiracy theories he DOESN’T believe in, even ones that seemingly contradict each other.

-He lives in an RV deep in the forest. The RV is covered in moss and hasn’t been moved in at least 20 years. It’s at the end of a dirt road that’s impassable when it rains. He rarely leaves, but when he does, he drives an old beat up Subaru with a hundred somewhat contradictory political bumper stickers.

-He managed to rig up a setup for TV and shitty internet, but he’s very much stuck in the past technology-wise. He still rents DVDs and listens to the radio. His favorite pastime is listening to true crime or conspiracy podcasts, and/or watching news stories about how much California sucks.

-He may or may not frequently get mistaken for some type of cryptid.

-He used to work in the logging industry and he feels a lot of resentment at California and the “environmentalists,” who, in his opinion, ruined his life by lobbying against the industry, leading to the downfall of so many of “his” towns and plunging him into poverty. He’s extremely bitter about this, as well as every other wrong (imagined or real) committed by California and Oregon against him. (Just like California) He keeps receipts. He writes down everything in a journal, and takes it with him everywhere.

-He lets his resentment and anger control him. Instead of trying to better his own situation or trying to get along with others, he places the blame for his own failures on everyone else.

-A lot of his resentment and anger is (perhaps misplaced) jealousy. Of California. Of the other cities and regions of California who have (in his mind) everything he never had. Of the other states, who are recognized as such and the honor that brings. Of course he’d never admit this.

-He’s convinced in his own mind that he’s a real state, and has been for decades, and that everyone else is actively conspiring to hide that fact.

-In an attempt to to gain support, he’s gone to the other “misfits” in the nation like Puerto Rico, Hawai’i, and Maryland. Each attempt has backfired spectacularly, as he’s not exactly culturally or racially aware, and ended up saying some offensive shit to them.

-He tries to call both California and Oregon every Thursday to remind them that he’s a state, but they’ve long since blocked him on every form of communication. So he’s gone back to writing letters. They’re long-winded, filled with spelling errors, and list (in great detail) every grievance that Jeff has with both of them. He never gets a response, but he continues to send them.

-He also writes letters to various other California and Oregon cities— nasty, threatening letters if he hates them (San Francisco) or vague attempts to make friends if he likes/admires them (Bakersfield).

-He has a whole ass arsenal of guns. He is absolutely NOT a responsible gun owner. He should probably not be trusted with any type of weapon, not even a kitchen knife.

-He’s a self-proclaimed “survivalist.” He knows how to forage for food and he does eat a lot of wild blackberries and fish he caught himself. However, all the ramen and candy he eats on a regular basis might be hard to find during the apocalypse…

In conclusion, he (not California, as he claims) is his own worst enemy. He lets his legitimate feelings of betrayal and isolation burn out of control and rule his life. He’s lonely and bitter and he’s constantly seeking the kind of validation he never receives.

Also, here’s a playlist for this asshole. Mostly just vibes.

#wttt oc #wttt Jefferson #mur art #mur headcanons #I don’t think about this much at all /s #TLDR he’s an asshole #pathetic wet cat but not in a /pos way

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bullet-prooflove · 1 month

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Pushy - Cyrus Lupo x Reader

Tagging: @crazy4chickennuggets @kmc1989 @oureternalbond @darqchilddaydreamz @words-and-seeds @infinity-mars @malindacath @tkappi @greenies-green @trublu2u @thatcrimeshowchick

When Ed leaves it sends Cyrus into a tailspin because he feels entirely culpable. He’s the one that dug up the evidence that put Ed in Cutter’s path, he’s the one that found April, the woman he’d been trying to hide, he’s the one that tanked the other man’s career. You watch it happen over a series of weeks. You see how downtrodden he becomes; despite Ed’s parting words he still feels the burden of that responsibility.

When there’s a knock on the door, he doesn’t expect to see you standing there with a bag of takeaway food in your hand from that place down the street, the one he’s always raving about because it’s completely authentic. He’s clad in plaid pyjama bottoms and a navy blue t-shirt.

“I have food.” You inform him before taking a DVD out of your satchel. “And I have Demolition Man.”

He laughs because it’s a call back to the way he used to handle his shit back in the day. The woman he loved, snuggled against him on the couch, the two of you eating Chinese food and watching 90s action movies.

He opens the door to let you in and you’re instantly assailed by Otto wagging his tail and snuffling at you because he wants to show you the new duck toy that Jude got him. The damn thing has been driving Cyrus quietly mad because it honks whenever he bites down onto it. He takes the food from your hands before retreating to the kitchen. He glances over his shoulder to see you crouching down, placing kisses on the top of Otto’s head.

“Have you been looking after him, yes you have? Yes, you have.” You say and he finds the edges of his lips tipping up into a smile because this is how he envisioned his future with you once upon a time.

He’s in the midst of plating up the food when you come into the kitchen, leaning against the counter.

“Ed’s tried to call you a few times.”

“Yea, I know.” He says with a heavy sigh. “I’ve been busy.”

You don’t speak and neither does he, it’s a classic interrogation technique, letting the silence hang so that the perp feels the need to fill it.

“I don’t know what to say.” He tells you, placing his hands on the surface of the counter. “When my brother died, I wasn’t in a good space, he helped me to get my head on straight, took me under his wing and I repaid him by helping them indict him.”

“It wasn’t as simple as that.” You remind him.

“It kind of was.” He snaps at you.

“Do you think Ed would be calling you if he thought that was true?” You ask him. “He knows how tough this was on you, the position he put you in.”

The line of his jaw tenses. He knows you’re making sense, what happened between him, and Ed is a two-way street. If the other man had been upfront Cyrus wouldn’t have gone digging, if Cyrus hadn’t have gone digging Ed wouldn’t have been vindicated.

“I’ll call him.” He says finally.

“You could text him.” You suggest, pushing his phone towards him across the counter. “Like right now?”

“I forgot how pushy you were.” He mutters, picking up his phone and typing out a message before setting it back down on the counter. “Happy?”

“Yea.” You say as you collect the takeaway containers and deposit them in the bin. “Sometimes you just need a little shove in the right direction.”

“I appreciate this you know?” Cyrus says as you wash your hands in the sink. “You coming over here, cheering me up.”

“We’re friends.” You say softly, your shoulder nudging gently against his as you dry your hands. “Friends take care of each other.”

“Is that all we are?” He asks you, his eyes meeting yours. “Because it feels like it’s been heading towards more for a while now.”

“Cyrus…” You begin but the words die away because he leans in close, his lips brushing over yours.

It’s tender, the way he kisses you. His lips soft as they caress yours. It’s a rush, a heady mix of feelings and sensations that you’ve spent the best part of a year trying to deny. He kisses you until you’re breathless, until all you can think about is the press of his firm body against yours. Your hands rake through his unruly curls, and he moans into your mouth at the sensation. You want him, you want him more than you’ve ever wanted anyone. Your fingers trail underneath the hem of his t-shirt…

The sound of your phone cuts through the air, interrupting the moment. You break away unwillingly, your forehead coming to rest on his, your body tingling with anticipation as you withdraw your phone from your back pocket.

“I forgot I’m on call tonight.” You murmur as you survey the message. “It’s Lennie, I’ve got to go.”

“I get it.” He tells you, pulling away reluctantly.

“But I want to do this again.” You tell him, grasping the bottom of his t-shirt and tugging him back towards you.

“Yea?” He asks as he smiles down at you.

“Definitely.” You tell him before raising up on your tiptoes and stealing another kiss.

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#cyrus lupo #cyrus lupo x reader #cyrus lupo x you #lupo x reader #lupo #lupo x you #law and order #jeremy sisto

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