Tumgik
#but yet i do still love to watch them. and it can be fun to look at a new one or an old favorite every now and then <3
gojonanami · 1 day
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“ A HOUSE IS NOT A HOME ”
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pairing: satoru gojo x reader
summary: you come home after a long day of work unable to find the person you call home anywhere — until you reach the bedroom.
warnings: 18+ suggestive, fluff, comfort, some angst, implications of the shinjuku showdown arc, implied gojo is no longer a sorcerer, gojo is your househusband, taking a bath together, taking care of him, copium really, satoru being a silly man
w/c: 1,184
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“I’m home!”
You call into your home, the clatter of your keys and shoes as you shedded the things that chained you to the outside to submerge yourself in your oasis and into his arms. But as you got no reply, you stepped into your living room, scanning over the kitchen, to find no one.
Now where was your home?
“Satoru?” you called, heart skipping a slight beat, he was always waiting for you when you got home, usually on the couch or maybe in the kitchen the clank of the knife as he chopped away. Or even the many times that he was waiting by the door to only ambush you with kisses. But this time, nothing.
You rounded the corner to the hallway and peeked into your bedroom to find him asleep. You crept closer, careful not to wake him, and yup, he was fast asleep. His pretty snow white lashes resting against his cheeks, his chest slowly rising and falling as the soft sounds of his breaths parted his lovely lips.
You could watch him sleep for hours. You knew he never did enough of it before, and you’d argue he still didn’t do enough of it now. He always said he was fine sleeping 6 hours since it was twice as much as he usually got — and now he was working at home, so he could be ease.
But even so, you know he needed more.
As if he senses your thought, he stirs, starry blue eyes finding yours as he flutters sleep from his gaze, “sweetheart?” He’s murmuring, voice still beautifully raspy from sleep, “when did you get home?” He’s shifting to get up, but you use gentle hands to ease him back, “I haven’t started on dinner yet, sweets—“
“I got it, Toru,” you’re running your fingers through his hair, “just rest, baby,” and a protest is already on his lips, “let me guess what you did today — cleaned the house from roof to floor, stocked us on groceries, cooked lunch for me for the week, and probably a million other things,” you lean down to press a kiss to his forehead, “I think I can handle dinner for one night at least,”
He’s pouting now, “but you just got home from work, Princess, what kind of househusband would I be—“ and you can’t help but laugh, he loved his self appointed title of househusband, especially since it was one he had chosen for himself, and he took any opportunity — even now to call himself that.
“I think even the absolute best househusbands need a break, and should listen to their wives, since I’m the one you want to pamper so much,” and his lips party in protest, but you’re leaning down to kiss them and his pout away, “let me take care of you, Toru,”
He’s sighing, as he leans up to press his forehead to yours, “and does your offer include a bath, sweetheart?”
~~~
“Y’know sometimes I feel guilty,” and you pause in your massage of his head, fingers tangled in his hair, suds from the bath you’d drawn for him covering both of your bodies as he leans against you in your tub, back pressed flush to yours.
“Guilty about what?” you ask, holding your tongue on the million reasons why he shouldn’t.
“For so long, I was the strongest,” he gives a small chuckle, “and it was fun, sometimes. But it was mostly lonely,” he leans back to look up at you, a small grin on his lips, “except when I was with you,” your lips curl, “and now I get to be with you, and I get to stay home — and the worst thing I have to do are the dishes,” and you snort.
“I told you I’d do them if you hate them so much,”
But he’s shaking his head, “Sometimes I think trying to deal with our cast iron is worse than fighting Sukuna—“ and you roll your eyes, “but there’s always this urgency that I have to be doing more. Telling me to keep going, moving, fighting—“
“You’ve done enough, Toru, more than enough,” your fingers cup his cheek, “too much, honestly. It’s okay to rest now. You’ve done your part—“
“But—“
“Didn’t you or someone say jujutsu is like a marathon, a baton pass?” Your fingers run through his white locks, before you shift yourself to sit in his lap instead, “the marathon is over, racers have packed up and gone home, and the finish line has been crossed,” your fingers rest on the back of his neck, tracing his undercut, “and that’s because of you and all you did to fight and raise up the next generation,” you say softly, and he’s pressing his head to your forehead.
“Is it okay for me to rest now?” and you’re pulling him into your arms, hoping your touch conveys what your words can’t.
“Yes, it is, Satoru,” you’re pressing soft kisses to his neck, “you don’t need to be the strongest. You’re Satoru Gojo, and that’s all I want,” and he leans back, “you’re all I want,”
“Is that a proposal?” And you snort.
“We’re already married, weirdo—“ and his lips find yours, as they always did, his arms around your bare waist, as the water shifted and splashed, but you could barely feel anything except his lips against yours and the circle of his thumb against the small of your back.
He finally pulls away, a genuine smile on his lips, “And you married this weirdo,” and you chuckle, tracing his jaw with your finger, “you’re stuck with me for life,”
“Promise?” And he’s kissing you again in an instant, stealing your breath like he did the first time you met him all those years ago at jujutsu tech. And you knew you’d never love anyone else — not like him.
“Promise.”
Bonus:
Satoru’s arms wrap around you from behind as the two of you towel off after your bath, “what are we having for dinner?”
“Well someone insisted on me being in here with him, so I had to order out,” and he’s grinning, as he nuzzles your neck.
“Whoopsie, hehe,” and he’s humming, as he tugs your hips against his, the friction drawing a gasp from your lips, “can we have dessert first?”
“It is dessert. We’re having ice cream for dinner—“ and he’s kissing you again, but this time it’s languid and messy — all tongue and teeth, until he’s pulling away with a smirk at your breathless face.
“I want something sweeter, wife,” and you smile.
“Think you can finish before the delivery gets here?” And he’s already picking you up with ease in his arms, pinned under him in a moment, as his ocean blues flash with mischief from between your thighs.
“I can, but I don’t know if you’ll be done by then.” He says cheekily, as you only sigh.
If there was one thing that would always be true is that you would always be weak to Satoru Gojo — but not his abilities, but who he is.
Your husband.
“Let’s see, hm?”
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a/n: I’m real upset about the leaks and this is my coping. I needed this.
taglist: @staryukis, @cloverlilies, @asgoodasdead666, @strawmariee, @chuuyasboots, @forest-fruits-jam, @catsgomurp, @rat-loves, @hanlay, @risuola, @spider-fan72, @sunamatic, @difficultdomains
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i-am-hungry-24-7 · 1 day
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[We went on shopping (it didn’t go well)] - TF141*F!Reader
not a chapter actually just a rambling, it's kinda messy and not my style imo, pls feel free to skip this etc. might rewrite this shit when I have time since I’m busy with my job these days and I just accidentally sliced my thumb open making it difficult to type, hence not much to provide sorry :( and the weird stranger incident in the latter part did happen irl damn it’s creepy af, but I was the one telling them to fuck off tho (they harassing my cute friend RAGE)
Summary: You sigh when it's the fifth time someone fights in your poor tea shop this month. You just open it two months ago, in an area ruled by mafia called '141'. Maybe you should find their boss and give them money or what to stop the bullshit keeps happening in your shop. (well, here they come)
Mafia!TF141*F!Reader
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3
After your car graduates from its car life in about a week, congratulations, the poor shelf accompanies you since your college life is finally undone, fragments spreading across the floor making you shout Mama and mourn for its graduation.
You don’t have a car right now, so when Gaz offers to drive you to buy a new shelf, you agree to his suggestion without a second thought. Yet when the day comes and you open the car door, only to be greeted by the wide smile of Soap and Gaz, you almost slam the door close in reflex.
“Okay, but why do all of you come together? this isn’t an elementary school field trip!” You gawk at them when you squeeze in the car.
“Sounds fun, how can ye not tell us?” 
“Gaz I thought you could seal your lips!”
“Sorry love, Ghost exchanged it with some goodies.”
Oh yeah, Ghost is sitting in the driver’s seat.
Wait, he’s sitting in the driver's seat?
“Goddamnit—“ Your scream dies out on your tongue when said man puts his foot down. 
Ghost does a good job at providing you the same experience as riding a rollercoaster, glad that you didn’t throw up in the car and arrived at the warehouse without dying. If he's your Uber driver, you will give him five stars and block the hell out of him. 
You hop out of the car and walk to the door. As the automatic door parts after sensing your presence, you feel much better when the cold air of the store. Nice a.c. is one of the important features of a nice store, and you already built a fondness for the warehouse with how refreshing the chilly air is inside.
The first area welcoming you is food. Not bad, 6 out of 10 if it needs to be precise. Gaz pushes the cart and follows you as you saunter to the aisle with cereals.
“Oh, they have my favorite brand.” You murmur to him as your eyes travel across the price tag.
Wait, you must still be dizzy because no way it’s 30% cheaper than the same one you just bought from the supermarket.
“Kyle, it says it’s 3 pounds, right?!” pointing at the tag, your voice raises a whole eight-tone with excitement.
“Yes?”
“Good.”
5 boxes of cereal are added to the cart. 
Actually, 9.9 out of 10 for this place, you fix the evaluation as you watch Gaz putting some of those ten bags of chocolate Ghost and Soap dump into the cart back on the shelf, and as a little revenge to Gaz for letting the other two men join the trip without you knowing, you choose to turn a blind eye when you spot Ghost sneaking all of them back in the cart.
Not forgetting the primary goal for today, you go straight to the furniture area after letting Soap throw five packs of gummy bears in the cart and convincing Ghost not to get a cup of tea from the random tea shop. You’ll make a much better one for him when you get home — you coo when he stares at you with unhappy eyes not covered by the mask, glad that he seems to accept the idea, so he huffs and lets you drag him and Soap out of the food area.
“You should buy this.” 
“Ghost I don’t need a green shelf in my shop thank you.”
“Then ye should buy this bonnie!”
“That’s not even a goddamn shelf, Soap.”
“How about this?” 
Your eyes brighten up when Gaz shows you a wooden shelf, it’s stripped-back, with not many decorations, but it surely will fit wonderfully into your store with its aesthetic vibes and high functionality, thus you pick up your phone to type down the product number immediately.
“Oh my, Kyle, you’re the best.”
and you’re too busy typing the numbers down that you don’t notice him shooting the others a taunt of victory.
The last area before the cashier’s counter sets a bookshop. You don’t plan on buying books, but you indeed need to go to the bathroom, so you dismiss yourself and tell them to look around before you’re done.
Why are the bathrooms always hidden in a bloody long hallway? What if someone can’t hold back during their way? Your footsteps echo through the corridor as your mind starts hitting you with a fresh and unnecessary question, glad that you aren’t that urgent though, so you’re able to get to the destination without wetting your pants.
Washing your hands, you step back to the hallway again, but you yelp in surprise when you bump into someone.
“Sorry!” You nod at the man and start heading back to the bookstore.
but it’s weird, the man you just bump into walks so close to you, that you suddenly realize he’s just a step behind you.
Hey, don’t panic, might just coincidence, you try to tell yourself as you make another step.
“Hey, lovely.” Okay, it’s not a coincidence, fucking hell. You curse when his hand touches your shoulder and stops you.
“Sorry for bumping into you, Sir. Anything that I can help?”
“No, I’m waiting for you to separate from the blokes for a while can’t ask for your phone number when they surround you like dogs.”
“I don’t give strangers my number, sorry.” You try to leave, but the man’s hand grabs your shoulder forcefully preventing you from moving.
“Hey, give us a chance yeah? I’m sure we will have some nice time together.”
“I don’t fucking know you!”
Prying off his hand, you turn and start walking fast, almost running when you hear the stranger’s footsteps coming towards you.
Fuck fuck fuck, you haven’t run with such desperation in years, last time must be high school.
“Who the fok are ye arsehole?”
The tears prickling in your eyes when you hear Soap’s voice ringing in your ears before you feel a pair of warm hands drag you behind him.
“Ghost and Soap will deal with him, let’s go.”
Adrenaline pumping through your body finally subsides when Soap and Ghost reappear from the hallway, you don’t want to know what happened to the stranger, maybe hope they’re still alive and in one piece so you won’t involve yourself in another chaos, 
“I think it’s time to go home, Kyle. Is it okay?”
“Of course, wanna grab some food before we leave?”
“I guess Ghost already bought sufficient chocolate for us.”
A burst of laughter catches your attention whilst Gaz looking at the cart with bags of chocolate stuffing under your cereals with disbelief, and a smile crawls back to your lips as you look at Ghost slamming his forehead against a lower door frame and Soap laughing over him.
They aren’t that bad, maybe, or they reserve the remnants of tenderness for you, you’re not sure whether is correct, but at least they have your back when you need them, and that’s enough for you to stop exploring the answer for now.
“Oh.” A book gets knocked off when you shift to stand up. Turning around to pick it up, you have a good look at the shelf behind your seat.
Your eyes dart from ‘Today’s recommendation’ to the book within your grasp.
‘Surrounded by idiots — by Thomas.’
You will rate this recommendation 10 out of 10 for sure.
After insisting on paying yourself and shooing the men off, you take out your card and place it on the scanner.
‘Insufficient balance :( please try again’
You frown when the machine shoves you a nuh-uh, and you open the bank app to check your balance.
So you overspent 10 pounds huh? What a shame to your title for being a successfully financially broken adult. Which link loses and makes you make a wrong shopping decision? 
you scan the list of items with sharp vision until you land your eyes on a product.
Surrounded by idiots - £ 10.61
Ah.
a/n: thx for reading :D sorry it's messy and unlike my previous writings :( hope I can have time to write again btw Price went on business trip so he's missing everything
tag list :D - @blackhawkfanatic @nexthyperfix @danielle143 @goodbyegh0st @reaperxxxxzz @kaoyamamegami @imyprice @cod-z @poppingaround @live-for-fluff @masterstr0ke @mall0ww @ghostysloot @hxnneydew @cutiecusp @beigechristmastree @rejectedbytheempty @lupikekee @hotvinimon @whitetiger846
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r0-boat · 3 days
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Whb Demon Kings as fathers from best to worst.
Sfw yet dark because children are involved
This is just for fun a little fantasy don't have babies with any of these chuckle fucks.
Cw: toxic familial (kings love their kids, but they ain't perfect :/ the kid are no better)
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I firmly believe that Satan is a good father. The only reason why he's so low is because his anger. His child is a firecracker and he fully supports that rage anger "That's my little baby... Off to destroy the angels..."
Lucifer
When he does not know how to take care of a child he will sit down and read. He will make sure your child and you are healthy and safe.
Holding his child in his arms, His eyes soften this tiny little being you had made and he helped bring into this world.
Lucifer can be overprotective over his child at any age they are still his little young one And that will never change, He helps parent happily holding his child and his arms and feeding them. He is the demon of pride and he wants his child to be the best. He wants his child ready for one day they will rule Paradise Lost. When they're old enough he will tell them everything.
Lucifer is a strict father yet caring. He strict because he loves The both of you these rules are in place for a reason.
Satan
He is the guy to SCREAM his child name in assemblies, and aggressively root for them in team sports. "FUCK YEA! THATS MY FUCKING KID!!"
Trying to punish would be a nightmare. Your kid is the child of Wraith They and his father getting fights half of Gehenna will be destroyed. At least Satan is there to stop tantrums.
He is the angry soccer mom yelling at team to get in the car so he can take them to a game to beat the shit out of Tartaros team and mammon's kid. He has snacks juice everything
Mammon
Listen Mammon's got money so he with get his kid anything they will ever desire. The reason why he's third is because that child will be spoiled rotten. Tartaros little royal...
Anything that kid wants Mammon will get. Good luck trying to unravel that when Mammon is constantly telling them about how important they are how they own everything.
That's his child so of course everything he owns is theirs now... But the child is the prince of greed so they are gonna want things on there own. There with be desputes on gold and materials. However on like Satan and his child these two actually talk through their disputes instead of wrestling they have a very mature almost interrogation like discussion of what comes they own and they will own.
If you think the spoiling for you is going to stop when the child is born you're wrong. In fact now that you have a wealthy child and husband they're both going to work together to spoil beloved Mom/spouse.
Beelzebub
This man does not handle responsibility well. He loves his kid but He will be skipping out on at most 50% on parental responsibilities. He does start stepping up a little bit. He actually does go to work...
Beel adores his kid, Beel spends a lot of time with them. He bought a baby sling to carry them around when he goes to work. He wants to show his child all the beautiful spots in hell. When any devil asks him about his kid he with tell you all about them.
Sadly he is forgetful especially with dates. Please remind him about important miles downs or important things that his child has going on. He will feel very remorseful if he forgets.
He can be a good father, just watch that man.
Leviathan
No one is surprised. This man is the literal embodiment of envy. Don't get me wrong he does love his child. It is his kid, and he is trying. He wants to be a father He wants to be a father he never got, as a kid he didn't even know what a parent was So of course he'd want to give his child a life he wish he got. He holds his child, He helps you feed them, And he brings them everywhere. He lets you rest. However that jealousy does flare up which leads him to do childish things.
And he is protective of his kid. of course he is. That is his kid. His kid with you a proof of his love. Proof that you are his. Every time he looks at them he sees a mix of you and him and his heart fills with love. A moment of softness with Levi when he thinks about how his child will a fine Prince one day.
And as the child of envy they are going to be a literal copy of him. When they get older there will be a lot of father vs child moments especially with getting your attention. Your child loves their father, And they do want to make him proud. They love being The Prince of envy, They want to be just like him.
I think parent child duo is even more dangerous. Teaming up to fight a common threat is more often than you think. Envy is just a weird way they bond I guess. You will never get peace in that household.
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A Quiet Love
Sorry for the lack of updates. Been very busy with schoolwork and fell sick today. Still, here's my latest need to cuddle with Astarion.
Oh I also went to Anime Impulse at Seattle and gosh that was fun. Bought an Astarion print and a standee to start my Astarion shrine in my cupboard, bought a wooden magnet carving of a rly cute egg sushi, bought some stuff for my friends back home too.
Summary: You have a nightmare and Astarion chases it away in his own way.
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Ragged breaths tear through you as you run through the trees, clutching your bleeding side with one hand and wiping away your sweat with the other. You can hear the shouts of your pursuers, hear the thundering hooves of the horses some of them are riding, all of which spur your feet onwards in spite of the screams from your muscles.
Your head spins and you nearly fall over. You won’t last long in this chase, they will catch and torture you before executing you in front of the whole town, exactly as the oracle had predicted. Still, if that is your destiny, you’re not about to just roll over and let them have you. If they want you, they are going to have to work for it.
You stumble in a zigzag pattern, darting in and out of your pursuers’ sight and hear their hollers of frustration, causing you to grin. Your pursuers are terrible at their job if they can’t even catch a wounded target. You nearly laugh out loud, stopped only by the blood that bubbles up your throat when you try.
Even so, they inevitably catch up to you. With how your vision keeps giving way, there is no other outcome, but you continue to be defiant, resisting their capture even as the black spots worm their way in.
“Come on, scared of injured prey?” You cough, sending a bloody grin their way. Your pursuers move closer, encircling you but they maintain their distance, much to your amusement. You can feel your lifeblood leaving your body, you won’t last much longer and yet they’re still so afraid of you.
Your fingers curl, ready to fight as hard as you can before they take you when a fireball incinerates half the pursuers, leaving nothing but blackened ash. A war cry follows suit, revealing a tiefling with one horn and a githyanki warrior charging into the fray swinging their weapons which takes out most of the remaining pursuers.
Your gaze flicks about the battlefield, looking for a particular pale elf but you don’t see him amidst the chaos of it all. One of your remaining pursuers, however, spots you and moves in from behind, gladius primed to strike but a dagger plunges into his neck before he gets the chance.
“You really need to watch your back more, my love. I can’t watch it for you forever.”
Your eyes light up when you see who it is, the urge to run over and jump into his arms tugging at your heart but all you can manage is a hasty stumble in his direction, a silent yelp leaving your lips as gravity pulls your body downwards, straight at the ground.
“Falling for me again?” A pair of cold arms wrap themselves around you, stopping your descent. You heave a relieved sigh, closing your eyes as you lean into the cooling embrace of your vampire lover, feeling your body give out without an adrenaline high to sustain it anymore.
“I will always fall for you,” you murmur tiredly. You feel your body sag against his, feel his panic as he realises you’re bleeding out all over the ground. His voice rises a pitch, sharp fingernails digging ever so slightly into your flesh and you want to comfort him, reassure him that you’re not going anywhere but your muscles refuse to move and you can’t do anything about it.
“Darling, stay with me. As tasty as you look leaking blood, you’re leaking too much blood.” He holds you close, trying to staunch the bleeding with one hand while the other haphazardly rummages through the bag for a healing potion.
“Too…much…? I thought…you’d…appreciate it…” You’re getting dizzier and dizzier, with more of your vision fading to black. His red eyes pierce the veil that’s being drawn over your eyes, willing you to stay awake but the pull of the void is too strong, you can’t hold on anymore.
“Well, you see love…love? Love!”
And the world turns black.
You wake up with a start, chest heaving and sweat running down your back.
A nightmare. A rather vivid one at that.
You pinch the bridge of your nose, willing your thundering heart to calm down before it can wake the trancing vampire next to you but his movements suggest that he has already woken up.
“Nightmare?” He murmurs quietly, his tone a far cry from his usual way of speaking.
“Hrm,” you reply, blood pounding in your ears. The world refocuses, showing you the vampire who is gazing at you with such concern in his eyes, his eyebrows creased in worry.
“I’m alright, Star. Just need to…get a breath of fresh air,” you wave him off. “Sorry for interrupting your trance.”
“I was about to head off for a hunt.” He pauses for a moment. “Would you like to come along, my dear?”
“That…sounds nice.” You rub your eyes, feeling his hand brush against yours. Giving his hand a squeeze, you push yourself up, wiping the night’s terrors away and step out into the cool fresh air, taking a deep breath. You hear him stop just behind you, his shoulder brushing against yours and you take his hand once more.
“I just need you,” you whisper, the words meant only for his ears. He nods, pressing closer to you and swallows the honeyed words that almost fall from his lips out of habit. What you need now is him, not the words his tongue can form, not the services he can provide.
You just need him.
It’s not something anyone else can provide, it’s something unique to him and something he’s comfortable with providing. If all you want is for him to sit by your side, he will happily do just that.
Astarion lets you lead the way, sitting on the steps next to you with a clear view of the city. He wants to know what your nightmare was about so that he can reassure you better, but watching you take in the city’s night lights with quiet awe, he decides that dredging up the past can wait and patiently sits next to you, exactly like he promised. He takes your hand, relishing in the way your fingers automatically curl around his hand.
“I’m right here, my love.” he says for no other reason than he wants to say it. You nod, squeezing his hand before resting your head on his shoulder, letting out a deep breath.
“Thank you,” you whisper. The quiet night beckons the words from your lips, the words you have yet to say to him and mean it with all your heart. You feel him slip an arm around your waist, pulling you closer and feel his lips ghost over your hair.
“I love you.”
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jeons-catalyst · 2 days
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antis always say military service isn’t a honeymoon and they’re right. it’s gonna be one of the hardest things in their life if not the hardest to endure and they chose to do it together i think that’s says enough in itself. but the fact being together ultimately makes it harder and they still chose each other. like wow seriously
Antis don’t realize that saying that military service isn’t honeymoon is them making our points for us. What is there to admire about a couple who can only stick together in the good times? See eh, one of the reasons why i will always celebrate the pair that is jikook is because these two have proven time and time again that they are each others ride or die.
Jikook are not the two who only stick together to have fun or do activities together. They stick together even when there is no reason for them to be together and that is how you know that these two love being around each other no matter the circumstances.
Antis claim that a real couple would never choose to enlist together because of their fear of being discovered but i don’t agree. I think that being together through this 18 months was important to Jimin and Jungkook. I don’t want to say they are co dependent but i don’t think they do very well without each other especially Jungkook and we all saw it in chapter two. People may try to downplay it as much as they like but Jungkook was literally screaming his lungs out about how much he missed Jimin. We have seen the young man listen to other members songs on Live but not once have we seen him go Live purposely to watch someone like he did for Jimin. With the other members, he starts doing something else and then decides to listen to their songs halfway through the Livestreams and sometimes he does it because fans suggest he listens to them in the comments but with Jimin, no one had to ask Jungkook to do anything. No one was even expecting him to yet he did and the way he did it was completely different. Jungkook couldn’t sleep at 4am and woke up to watch Jimin something he had never done before and never did again and someone is trying to tell me he did that just because?
Jimin and Jungkook didn’t have to enlist together. They could have enlisted separately and probably would have been placed in better units but those two chose to do this together knowing that they were probably going to be sent to the front lines. Anybody who tries to interpret this in any different way other than the fact that these two were intentional about being together, just likes to lie to themselves.
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umadosedepascal · 1 day
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C O R O N A, MEXICO | Pedro Pascal X f!reader | One Shot
Written by Santa Trindade
Banner by @missyorkswhore
Made in Brazil
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Pairing: Pedro Pascal x f!reader
Summary: You got invited by Corona to be an extra on the new “La vida mas fina” campaign at the beach.
Even if was only one single scene, maybe just 10 seconds of screen you would be more than happy because the main reason was him…Pedro.
wc: 2.6k
rating/warnings: [pure smut no plot][unprotected PIV][oral sex m/f] [alcohol comsuption] [Curse words][pet names]
a/n: C’MON GUYS. Do I need to explain myself after these ads? NO. FUCKING HELL NO. wtf Pedro is so fucking hot WTF. 😭
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You got invited by Corona to be an extra on the new “La vida mas fina” campaign at the beach.
Even if was only one single scene, maybe just 10 seconds of screen you would be more than happy because the main reason was him…Pedro.
After the shooting you are allowed to walk around the set. Maybe do a small talk perhaps. That’s all you want just to make your day.
The director wraps up the bar scene and move to another set. You sit on the bench at the bar they just did the scene.
_why he has to be so hot?_
You order a beer and just watch the movement, people coming and going…
Pedro sits next to you saying “what a day huh? Hey, you were at the beach right?”
You say.. ”Me? Yeah” you get your eyes locked on him… drinking on him… your eyes run across his entire body… you take every single detail…
He moves closer, holding the beer out to you… giving you a smile as he get close…and say “So gorgeous” leaving you in a whisper… your body stands there, staring at him…
You say… “sorry, Did you just said the “gorgeous” to me?” Your face blushing and try not to look at him in the eye. You take a sip of beer and wait on what he is going to say.
“Yes…” he nods softly, moving closer to you, leaning against the bar next to you, close, so close he can smell your perfume. His head leans over, his mouth near your ear, his breath tickling your ear as he speaks, “I said you’re gorgeous…” winking at you.
You drop your mouth and still don’t believe he called you gorgeous. You try to hold on yourself and thank him for the compliment and also say that was fun to act with him at the beach early that morning and if he is looking forward for more…
He gives you a wide smile as he speaks.
“That was fun… and it’ll only keep being fun…” his arm moves out, sliding along the counter, moving a bit behind you, resting there as he brings the beer to his mouth, another chuckle leaving him at the thought of the wink…
“Your winks are something else…” he tells you, taking another sip as his arm stays right behind you….
His head leaning closer again, his mouth brushing gently against your ear as he speaks again, his voice low, his teeth pulling on your earlobe playfully
“Oh it was fun… getting to… watch you on the beach… the water dripping down your body… I hope you’re ready… for even more…”
His tongue flicks out, licking over his bottom lip, a small smile on his face.
Oh… I love that wink… the way it makes him feel inside… he’d smile back at you, a hand lifting, gently tracing along your jaw with his fingers, his head tilting “I’d love to see more…” his fingers tracing a pattern on your neck… “So… where are you staying?”
_you are very shy but still taking his compliments so well._
With sad eyes you say that you already checked out from your hotel because you taking a plane back home tonite but still 4pm and the shooting is over for both of you.
His smile softens, thinking, his fingers tracing along your cheeks, your jaw as he watches you…
“Oh… my sweetheart… that won’t do… I’m not letting you leave just yet…” he says softly.
“How about…” his eyes look at you, “how about I take you to my hotel? My beach condo…?” He offers, wanting you to stay for just a little longer…
You open a wide smile and nod for him..
“Well, in that case I will accept your offer, Pedro. You are so kind….”
You reach out to the buttons of his shirt and close them only saying.. “first I close them, later I open.”
He chuckles saying “Oh… mi amor… I’d give you everything…Let’s go, shall we?” with one arm gently wrapping around your waist, pulling you closer against him…
On the way to the hotel you ask him laughing “why did you say…donde come 4, come 6!?”
_Because that sentence got stuck on your head._
He smiles at you, laughing at that, saying “Because I like to eat, gorgeous…” a chuckle leaving his arm tugging you closer, his body pressing against you, “and you seem like you can take it.”
You arrive at the hotel, he opens the room door, his lips gently leaving a kiss on yours as you enter… “what should we do now, beautiful?” he says…
Not loosing time you let him kiss you as you enter the room closing the door behind him. The exciment is so in fire that accidentally you rip off his shirt instead of unbuttoning …
He grins as you kiss him, his body shimmying off the shirt before you can tear it, his mouth moving away from yours to laugh, another low chuckle leaving him as he watches you.
“Easy, love…” he laughs, a smile on his face, his head tilting, his arms gently wrapping around your waist, “let’s not destroy my clothes… I have to wear that on my next scenes…”
You both laugh, your body gently pulling him closer against you, his hand moving in, pulling off your shirt, tossing it behind him, his lips moving across your neck, his mouth gently kissing over it, his teeth gently nipping, leaving love bites there.
“How are you going to make it up to me, cariño… I need a new shirt now…”
You say playfully.. “they might have more of the same for you to shoot tomorrow my dear” while reaching down to his inner tigh feeling his hard cock over his jeans.
“Maybe…” he laughs, another moan leaving him as he feels your hand brushing against his growing bulge.
His mouth pulls away from your neck to look at you, a mischievous look is on his face, his hands gently gripping your hips. His tongue licks over his lip, his head tilting as his hips gently grind against you, “or…” he pauses, smirking, “I could make you pay for it…”
You grab him by the chin, tickling his salt and pepper beard asking “how can I pay you Mr Pascal?” Giving him soft kisses on the corner of his mouth.
“Well…” he whispers, “pay me… with your mouth…”
You push him towards the king size bed, he let it go easily falling on his back on the mattress. “With… my mouth?” Rubbing his bulge through his pants. “You know what do you want?”
He laughs again, a groan leaving him, his body gently falling onto the bed, watching as you follow, his hands moving to unbutton his jeans, his body lifting a bit to pull them down, kicking them off as his head nods slowly…
“Oh…” he nods, “yes, my cariño… show me what you can do…”
You rub him over the boxers, looking at him with desire. One hand over his growing bulge while another alternating on his strong legs and tights.
“Darling…” he whispers, “I want to feel your… mouth…” bites his lower lip, looking down between the two of you, watching as your hand moves over him, watching as his body involuntarily tilts towards you, another groan leaving him as he feels you press against him, his head tilting back, a moan leaving him as the sounds leaves his mouth…
You slide your fingers around the waistband of his boxers lowering down…it’s thick, veiny oozing precum from his light pink head.
With a long lick from base to tip you wrap your mouth on his cock and with motion movements reach out your hands to pinch his nipples…
His head nodding, his fingers gently running through your hair as you slowly lift up, a groan leaving him, his eyes hooded, watching you, “God…” his mouth murmurs, his head falling back onto the bed, his body shivering as you gently lift up from him, “just like that…” he moans, his breathing heavy, his eyes closing
You’re glad he likes it, “but it’s not over.”
“I still have a couple hours with you. at your command now so I can pay for my crime” you chuckle…
He is watching you, thinking for a moment, a smile spreading over his face… “on your back…” he whispers, his hand gently pulling your arm, pulling you up onto the bed with him, “I wanna taste you…”
Another soft laugh leaving him as he gently rolls onto the bed, pulling you onto it with him, his eyes looking up at you, his hands gently tracing along your skin, running over your waist, pulling you close, his mouth moving over your waist, his tongue flicking over your skin, his eyes looking up at you as he put your undies to the side and presses a kiss on your core, his voice low, a possessive growl in
“Sweet… like candy…”
You run your fingers through his hair while he tastes you.
His mouth moves slowly, his tongue flicks out, tracing a pattern over your clit, his breath labored as he inserts his index finger into you with a thumb over clit overstimulating you with a thick spit he gives over your pussy.
A low moan leaves him, his eyes closing as he breathes you in, his breath heavy against you “God… you feel so good… I can’t get enough…”
He takes you to the edge letting you release with a loud moan.
Hardly you try to ask him to climb up on you so he doesn’t need to rub himself against the sheets…
Another groan leaving him, his tongue flicking out, trailing along your skin as you say that, his body shifting, lifting, his mouth trailing kiss over your skin as his hips gently slide up your body, one hand moving, gently wrapping around your ankle… bringing your leg up over his shoulder…
“You want me somewhere, mi corazón?”
“yeah, inside me, babe… go slow I’m still sensitive…”
His mouth gently pulling away from your skin to look at you, his eyes looking into yours… “of course, mi amor…” he whispers softly as his body moves, inching forward, his hands gently gripping your hips as his hips gently grind forward inside you slowly..
You let a little moan..
The way he is breathing heavy against your mouth letting out some low moans “you so tigh, babe. I don’t want to hurt you…”
You start to scratch his sweat broad back while his pounding you. The sensation is so good your nails scraping against his back as you scratching and clawing at it…the sound of skin to skin echoes through the hotel room along with loud moans…
“You like it rough, cariño?”
“Yes, I do, Pedro. Now punish me…” you say out of breath..
His body loving the feeling of your nails on his skin… his hand moving, landing a sharp slap against you, “you’ve been bad…” he whispers softly, his hips gyrating against yours, “can you take your punishment?”
His body moving, his hands gently pressing you into the mattress as he moves, lifting himself over you, his mouth moving up to leave a kiss behind your ear and on your neck
“Beg for mercy…”
His hands tracing over your body, his mouth kissing over you as he moves, gently lifting your other leg, putting them both over his shoulders.
He groans as you beg, his mouth moving on your neck, gently kissing there, his hands pressing around your wrists, pinning them above your head, his mouth leaving a rough bite, his tongue flicking out to soothe the skin
“What will you give me if I give you mercy…”
You say laughing…”another new brand shirt?”
He groans at your words, his teeth gently nipping at your neck, “that’s it?” his aquiline nose gently bumping at yours as he looks down at you, “are you sure that’s all I can have, mi cariño?
I’m sure I can find something else I want…”
“What else, hottie?” You say playfully.
His body grinding against yours, his legs moving around you, wrapping around you, pulling you close. His mouth moves down to kiss over your skin, “I want…” he whispers softly, “for you to do me favor…”
“what kind…of..favor?” You whisper with eyes closed.
He hears your question, his mouth moving on your skin, his hand moving up to gently cup your face, tilting it to look up at him, a devious smile on his face as his eyes look into yours…
“I want… to leave you feeling sore…”
“Yeah..leave me sore, Pedro” out of breath…
He smirks at you question with his mouth gently planting a kiss on your lips, “in the best ways… I want to go you feeling sore…” his mouth pulling away as he looks at you, “and I want you saying my name… like a prayer…”
“So make me sore…Pedro…”
His mouth moving as he whispers against your skin, his body gently shifting to press closer, “so… very sore…” he pauses, he looks at you, “are we in agreement…?” smirking a bit as his eyes look into yours, he’d gently grip your hip, rolling, flipping, pulling you to straddle him… his hands on your thighs…”
“And then…” you say.
He looks up at you, his hands moving, gently tracing up over your thighs, feeling the silken skin, his mouth tugging at your lower lip, his hands shifting to your bottom, his hands giving a little squeeze there as his eyes look up at you, “sit on me…” he whispers softly, “sit in my lap…"
“Pedro I just have little time now with you before I head home…” sitting on his lap..
His body shifting as you sit, his eyes closing as his arms wrap around you, pressing you close, lifting, gently pulling your head down as his arms wrap around you, holding you close and tight
“I know…” he whispers softly, “so… I want to make the most of it… for our last hour…” his arms pulling you down a bit, his mouth leaving kisses across your skin…
“Cum inside me, babe… let’s do it quick..hmmm?” You say with a little bit of sadness on your voice.
His hands moving on your body, his mouth trailing kisses down your neck, “you want me to give you my juice…” he whispers, his mouth moving, “right now?”
“Yes Pedro, fill me up..”
His hands moving to your thighs, feeling the silken skin against his fingertips, his mouth pulling away a bit as he looks at you, “how bad do you want it…” he whispers, “beg like you mean it…”
“Please…”
He looks at you pouting, “since you asked so nicely…” he whispers, his mouth pulling away from yours, his breath shaky and excited as he looks at you, his hands gripping your thighs, shifting you for a moment, “just tell me to stop if it ever hurts, sit back, cariño…” he whispers, his hands moving around, settling on your hips, guiding you until you’re comfortably back against him, his mouth biting your neck, his hands on your hips pulling you in, his body gently pulling you close… “just like this…” he whispers…
“Yes just like this…” you say while he fills you up with his hot delightful cum..
He rolls onto his back as he watches you get ready to leave, his body stretching out on the bed, watching you get ready to go, smiling as you take his shirt, sitting back, his arm behind his head, watching you, a small chuckle leaving him.
“And how will I get in contact with you again, mi vida?”
You will never know…
He laughs, shaking his head as he looks at you, his hand lifting, waving you off playfully, his eyes looking at you as laughs, “oh, so mysterious…” he shakes his head as he smiles, a low hum leaving him as another laugh leaves him.
“Such a tease…”
—————————
Thanks for being here and read our delusional fics, likes are appreciate, comments even more. If you want to ask anything, blast it!
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knightyoomyoui · 1 day
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[COMMISSION] LIVING WITH VAMPIRES: UNDER THE VEIL OF NIGHT  | TWICE x Male Reader  | CHAPTER : -PROLOGUE-
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Welcome to another brand new TWICE fic series of mine! This story will serve both as an adaptation and a soft reboot of the TWICE horror-comedy book titled “Living With Vampires” written by SaiDaChae29 published in 2020 which was sadly left discontinued until now. For this one, it scrapped some of the parts from the original while others were kept and applied changes which will lead to its direct continuation. Special mention also to @nchris00 who ordered a commission and entrusted me to recreate this interesting story as his request. Hope this one won’t disappoint! Thank you so much again!
Now, let’s get this one started shall we? “LIVING WITH VAMPIRES: UNDER THE VEIL OF NIGHT” By knightyoomyoui Commissioned by: @nchris00 Part: PROLOGUE Word Count: 1,681
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PRESENT TIME
I tucked the maknaes on their bedsheets after I delivered the rest of the girls into their bedroom except for Jihyo and Jeongyeon who are the most sober ones. Mina didn’t drink though since she’s allergic to alcohol, but she still passed out from exhaustion because of how fun we have went on this special day.
“Jeonghoon, are you sure this is on you now?” Jihyo asked me concerned, she was yawning already and it showed me more that my unnies are also tired now too.
“Yeah, I can handle this Jihyo noona. You can both go to sleep now.” I nodded as I looked around at our living room that is cluttered with empty beer cans, chips and plates.
“You sure? Well, don’t forget to rest after this okay?” Jihyo told me.
“Yes, noona.”
“As much as I would love to help Jeonghoon but I’ll leave this one to you now okay? I’ll get back from you tomorrow.” Jeongyeon turned to speak.
“No worries, noona.”
“Goodnight, Jeonghoon.”
“Goodnight noonas.”
They all went upstairs now and I heard them closing the door. I also released my own yawn but I’m not that much sleepy yet unlike them so I decided to volunteer cleaning the room. Also, I wanted to sleep on the couch for tonight anyways since it’s more cold and fresh here.
I started to drag the trash can and some extra garbage bag with me so that I can easily dump the mess we all created around here. I started with the cans, then I tied the used bags before replacing it with a new one then I went outside the dorm to take this out on the nearest garbage station in this building’s storey.
Going back to the dorm, I then proceeded on collecting the used plates, stacking them up and placed them on the sink. I’m the type of guy who hates seeing stacked plates on the sink and kinda not a fan of washing dishes so I immediately cleaned it off rather than letting it become an eyesore when the girls or me woke up tomorrow.
After putting them on the drying rack, I changed my outfit to my pajamas and slumped my body back on the couch. I breathe deeply to feel its softness while I blink rapidly as I stare on the wall, thinking of something to do before I go the sleep since I still don’t feel like resting yet.
Then something crossed my mind.
We just watched some vlogs that the girls recommended from their favorite YouTube channels, so I thought of an idea that what if I make my own vlog tonight.
Well, not exactly a vlog where I go record not only myself, but the people and the place around wherever I go that will require a much more editing process, I just felt like recording myself.
I was thinking of what should I say on the video, until another thing gave me an idea on what should I do with it.
I grabbed my phone that I’m confident enough of its camera’s quality, using it as I start to record myself. I set it up on our table and grabbed the mini-vase as its support before I prepare myself on the couch and press the record button.
As the timer starts rolling, I began to speak to the camera.
“Hi, Min Jeonghoon here. Right now its already 12:30 AM and it’s very late but I’m not sleepy yet so… I just wanted to do something interesting that will probably drain the remaining energy I have left in my body haha, and I thought of recording this video talking about…
how I met these nine ladies who turns out to be also… vampires.
I get it, saying it as if it is real would make me look like I’m crazy. Well, not like the others out there. Some would say I just tell a silly joke, but some might… be as crazy as me. Because this isn’t just a fiction. I’m just a type of guy who knows how right or wrong people are. And right now, believe me when I tell you that I’m sorry but… vampires do exist.
But before, I get to introduce them to you all, let me clarify some cliches and stuffs that turns out to be myths for people to believe in and pass it in every generations for others to learn. I want to educate others based from my own experience, with what I’ve learned about them during the entire 2 years of living with them.
First off, they are not immortals. They’re almost like us humans BUT like I said, almost because the little part of it that them still differs from us is that they age but way too slowly. I think its because of their DNA that works 10 times slowers that the normal one, so imagine that a vampire looks like 20 years old, well guess it already that its age might actually be in 200 years or something.
Oh and also, speaking of blood, they do have a very active cells of immune system, so it is true that their wounds or injuries heal a lot faster.
Next off, does vampires need blood to survive? Yes. That’s probably like the most common thing that we see in the movies right? Everyone also would even have it as their primary guess about what do they think about vampires, but at the same time they wanted to also confirm it if it does yet sadly they think it’s just a fantasy. But here I am now, telling you from what my own eyes have seen that they do indeed need blood.
Additional clarification, they drink animal blood though, not humans… even if its more healthy than animals. But they have to, because I’ve known these girls already that they cannot bear to kill a person because they are better than that. So, they found an alternative which is actually pig blood, mostly similar to humans which was proven by some scientists through what we call a “xenotransfusion”, some type of blood transfusion to humans. 
What’s also interesting about them is that they do behave having it as their most crucial need. Just like humans, if us cannot standing drinking water or eating food for more than 3 days, well it’s the same thing that can be applied to them, only that the blood involves with it too. They starve and get thirsty much worse than humans, so I’m telling you that you really must be careful at the other vampires that you may encounter in the public that is suffering from this, because it won’t hesitate for a single second to kill you and help that vampire satisfy its needs.
Third one would be… hmm oh yeah, this is also quite commonly asked about vampires. Do they actually have fangs? Yes, and it ‘s retractable. It only extends when they’re about to feast something… or somebody. It grows definitely way sharper and longer than both humans and animals combined, but it’s almost unrecognizable unless you pay attention to it.
Well… I remember it happened on the first time seeing it on the first day I met them… yeah. Kinda scary, but I got trained to get used by it. It’s just that this one specific girl just loves to make fun of me with it.
Fourth of the most frequently asked questions would be about vampires hating the sunlight. Yup, they’re are not comfortable with it at all. Just imagine a skin getting poured by a muriatic acid, that’s how their sensitive skin react to the rays. However, they don’t die easily. I think it’s their eyes that are much sensitive than their skin, because their eyes are mostly made for darkness, explaining why they are also considered as creatures who prefer to remain in the dark.
About the eyes though, I debunk some rumors that their pupils enlarge and turns to be almost black whenever they feel anger, hunger or something like that. It remains the same, however… don’t stare at them for too long, you may not know… you’re already acting unusual under their command. You’re probably gonna be enchanted about their eyes because their irises tends to possess some various special colors like either red, sky blue, etc.
To quickly insert some other informations that needs to be corrected or be proven, vampires don’t turn like a bat just like Dracula and Mavis from Hotel Transylvania, they are stronger and faster than our physical abilities, they also don’t hate garlic -actually one of the girls loves it on her food- or can’t see their reflection in the mirror. My girls do make-ups and loves fashion a lot so… that’s why.
Lastly would be yes, they can turn a human into a vampire once they bit them. But the transformation process is slow and painful once they inject that some sort of a venom into some human’s blood which would alter the DNA. They gotta endure it because if i’m not mistaken, there’s no cure yet for these.
I also remember when one of my friends here said that half-vampires also exists. It is rare actually, because mostly vampires doesn’t get attracted or involve in some sort of a relationship with humans. One thing I know that they would differ from a full blooded vampires is that they can actually go free around outside without getting burned or they don’t need that much blood to survive.
Well, that’s enough information for today’s video. Now let’s move on to these nine girls that I’m talking about. The vampires that took me in, thought that they would become a danger after I learned about their true identity, and yet here I am, ending up as their so called little brother figure and… the second family I now treat in my life.
Nayeon. Jeongyeon. Momo. Sana. Jihyo. Mina. Dahyun. Chaeyoung. Tzuyu. That’s the names of my friends... my sisters... and the people I already consider as the second family I cherish the most, no matter who they actually are.
And this is how my story went with them…
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beatrixstonehill2 · 19 hours
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"I'm a bit nervous but still pretty excited. My parents always raised me to believe it's a woman's job to please her man no matter what. If your bf is into big tits, you better grow bigger boobs or get the biggest implants you can stuff into them! Is he into fat girls? You better pile on all the weight you can for him. My friend Marcy dated a guy who was really turned on by girls with no arms or legs. She didn't hesitate for a minute to pop into the nearest surgeon and ask to have her limbs removed, despite being a gymnastics coach. I always admired any girl with that level of dedication and would feel like a failure as a woman if I couldn't reach the same standard.....
So, when I met Josh four months ago, and on our first date he confided he had a fetish for girls who get so pregnant they pop, my heart skipped a beat! Maybe..... this was like my ultimate test to prove how devoted I am to pleasing men and being a proper, good girl? I consulted with my parents and they were shocked I even thought the need to get their blessing. Sure enough a day later and my bf tells my doctor to put me on Femruptarin. My doctor looked very pleased about this, telling him he was a very lucky man, and to expect me to blow up in seven to eight months and enjoy the show. That he better flaunt me and show me off the whole time I'm pregnant. He promised he would, and that this isn't his first rodeo with bursting a girl by a long shot. I'm his tenth..... The whole time my bf and doctor never addressed me directly or asked my permission. I was perfectly womanly, acted on as an object for others' pleasure and nothing more. Like how Marcy existed to become her bf's limbless, breeder sex slave I exist to burst like a balloon for Josh.
I'm technically only about three and a half months pregnant and look at the size of me! I'm as big as a house. My womb is stuffed to the bursting point already and I'm tiny compared to how big I'll be by the time I fulfill my womanly duties for Josh and pop. True to his word, Josh trots me around town dressed in ludicrously skimpy clothes, showing me off, offering my body to men, since my body is technically his to give out! He makes me perform the wildest sex acts in public and I have to admit it is a lot of fun, and I do climax quite a lot before the crowds of people that gather, but my pleasure is not what's important..... Even if it is amazing to be sprawled out naked before a huge crowd, serving five cocks at once, my puffy, swollen pussy brutalized so utterly I squirt like a fire hydrant across the paved walkways of the local park. I love to be ravaged and fucked so savagely by random men, it's so very thrilling, I feel blessed to become Josh's girlfriend, even if it'll only last another five or six months if we're lucky.
Then I'll put on my best show yet for my community, and pop in front of them all, my uterus at last tearing and giving way as I shower my offering of twenty-some kids before my watchful audience. Free gifts for them to raise into the future devoted girlfriends and wives of our fair town..... It's so fulfilling to serve such an incredible man like Josh and be given the opportunity to be used as the community's personal receptacle for pent up sexual aggression. I hope Josh's next girlfriend is just as eager to burst for him, and he gets to indulge his fantasies with many, many more girls after her! Bursting is such a true sign of devotion that I'm positively blessed to be given the chance to give my body to do it for a guy!"
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spookymultimedia · 1 day
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Do you have any headcanons 4 cartman's pets? :3
Oh I absolutely do!! :D (very very long)
(CW mentions of pet death/loss)
Cartman got Mr.Kitty as a pet when he saw her outside at 4 years old. He chased the cat and physically dragged her inside, which prompted her to freak out in the house. Then Cartman fed her cake and begged pretty please with a cherry on top to keep the kitty. Liane has no choice in the matter really so of course they kept the cat. They didn't give her shots or neuter her, they just gave her a bath and fed her cat food and called it a day.
Cartman got Fluffy from the County Fair from winning a pie eating contest. Liane was shocked to see Cartman with yet another animal he wanted to keep. And she can't say no, so Fluffy came home with them. Funny enough she was actually easier to take care of than the cat. They usually fed her scraps. She had a pretty good diet of food that Cartman was supposed to eat but he gave it to her and pretended to eat his veggies so he could have dessert please. He taught Fluffy a couple of tricks like spinning and sitting on command. He even claimed he was gonna take her to the fair just like Wilbur in that Charlottes Web movie. Fun fact for years Cartman was convinced Wilbur was a girl and hated when people corrected him because he's used to thinking about the character a certain way and didn't feel like changing how he watched it.
He loved fluffy to bits but she died due to hereditary health problems. Instead of telling Cartman the piggy was dead she just fell in love with a daddy pig and ran away with him to have sex and babies. Cartman resents Fluffy for being such a whore and leaving him behind. He still cried in bed about it for a couple nights though.
Once Cartman tried to keep a pet frog. On wet mornings when frogs huddled around all the puddles, he and the other 3 tried to catch frogs. All of the frogs they caught always went missing every time they tried, so eventually they just gave up and moved onto something else.
Once Gerald snatched up Mr.Kitty and took her away by force while Cartman was screaming and crying at him to let her go. Later he claimed she wasn't vaccinated so she was dangerous to be around Cartman, but he was also using her for cheesing. Later Kyle helped Cartman steal his cat back and Liane promised they would give the cats shots and gave her neutered. After that Gerald left their cat alone.
When they got Mr.Kitty neutered they discovered that she's is actually intersex. Cartman was extremely extremely happy to have a pet who's just like him. Well not exactly like him but still.
For years he depended on Mr.Kitty to get him through his audio hallucinations and grounding himself. If she didn't wake up then no one is at the door trying to harm him and it's just his head being weird. Petting her is very therapeutic for him and calms him down when he's experiencing big scary emotions. He also liked letting her in his bed so she can be there if he gets a nightmare.
During middle school his cat went missing and he was extremely upset about it. He kept accusing that his girlfriend Heidi is responsible for the cat going missing. The longer she was missing the more he accused Heidi of lying to him, hurting his cat because she resents him and she's an awful person. For two whole weeks Butters helped Cartman search for his cat. His friends also helped but Butters helped the most. One night while he was driving home without Mr.Kitty yet again and realized he's never going to see his cat ever again. He broke into tears while Butters and Stan comforted him. Later Heidi finds him grieving his cat and she tells him he forgives him for getting upset at her and understands he was just stressed and didn't mean it. Cartman didn't apologize at all and let her hug and console him.
After that Cartman didn't own a pet for several several years. When he was in his late 40s and the most depressed he had ever been in his life, his therapist suggested owning a cat to give him a routine to have and help him cope with loneliness. So he adopted a cat and it worked. After awhile he ended up with 9 cats in his house, but then he got his shit together and gave away the ones that had bad relationships with the other cats or didn't enjoy being in his house. Then he was left with four cats. Which was a pretty big improvement but still makes normal people gawk at him. And he kept those cats for a long long time. I haven't thought much about the other three, but I know one of the cats is a three legged cat named Zipper. He was born like that. He's the fastest of the four cats and the most friendly one.
After Cartman passed away from cancer in his early 60s Kyle and Stan the two cats Cartman still had. The cats where very comforting for Kyle since he had a harder time coping with his the loss.
And not a pet headcannon technically but Kyle had a habit of putting cat food and cat nip near Cartman's gave to "keep him company." People give Kyle weird looks when he brings cat food to a graveyard but it makes him happy so he doesn't care.
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fluffyglass · 1 day
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Which grumpuses does yolka like best, and who does shelda trust to babysit her? P.s. I love her sm, the babything.
The Complete Yolka Babysitting List, with stats and extra details (might edit later)
Filbo
Babysitting Comfort: 3/5
Fun Level: 4/5
Shelda's trust in them: 1/5
Filbo likes watching over Yolka, but he's very nervous about messing something up. Shelda shares this sentiment and is never too keen to let him babysit, given his. Filbo-ness. Yolka, on the other hand, likes hanging out with Filbo a lot. I mean hey, he loses track of her so fast she can go on a little adventure! Somebody please teach this man basic responsibility.
Wambus
Babysitting Comfort: 2/5, later 5/5
Fun Level: 4/5
Shelda's trust in them: 3/5
Wambus was a little freaked out around Yolka at first, to be completely honest. Him and Triffany had always discussed having children of their own, but never got around to it, and suddenly he's being asked to look over this mystery infant?? However, he's kind of like your dad who doesn't want to get a dog. After a single afternoon, he's hooked. Just imagine them taking an afternoon nap in a rocking chair with Wambus's hat covering Yolka's entire head. I could hear that "Aww" all the way from here.
Beffica
Babysitting Comfort: 1/5
Fun Level: 2/5
Shelda's trust in them: 2/5
Honestly, if Beff can get out of babysitting, she always will. She's got snooping to do, she can't sit around with some weirdo baby. What's she supposed to say to her? I found out that your weird uncle is a karaoke singer? She is not lasting a second. Yolka does like her camera though, once again to Beff's dismay.
Gramble
Babysitting Comfort: 2/5
Fun Level: 5/5
Shelda's trust in them: 4/5
Probably one of the most ideal babysitters, at least if he wasn't so freaked out by the prospect of looking after a baby. As long as he's not alone (say hi to Auntie Wiggle!) he's pretty much golden. Yolka loves to play with his snax, and he basically has a built in playpen to keep her in one place. Eight out of Ten, wish he wasn't scared of kids.
Wiggle
Babysitting Comfort: 3/5
Fun Level: 4/5
Shelda's trust in them: 3/5
An audience that won't criticize her? Count Wiggle in! As long as she isn't in the middle of writing her magnum opus, Wiggle's always open to play with Yolka, even letting her play with some of her less fragile instruments. Yolka is going to be a famous triangle player one day, she swears by it.
Triffany
Babysitting Comfort: 5/5
Fun Level: 3/5
Shelda's trust in them: 5/5
Probably Shelda's safest bet if she needs to leave Yolka with someone. Wow! A decent, responsible adult on Snaktooth Island! Who can believe it? Yolka might not be crazy about bones but by Mother Naturae is Triffany trying to teach her. Sometimes if she's good she's allowed to put one in her mouth for a minute.
Cromdo
Babysitting Comfort: 4/5
Fun Level: 4/5
Shelda's trust in them: 1/5
Hello, opposite of Triffany! Cromdo is never allowed to babysit Yolka, because he- without fail- will attempt to convince this infant to join his business. Yolka is the lead manager of Cromdo Mart, and has also been taught plenty of words that a child her age really shouldn't know. Yolka loves him, Shelda hates him.
Chandlo
Babysitting Comfort: 3/5
Fun Level: 5/5
Shelda's trust in them: 4/5
If Chandlo's in charge of Yolka, then one thing's for certain; that infant is getting some GAAAAINZ! Usually he'll play games with her, sometimes picking her up and helping her dunk a ball into one of those kiddie basketball hoops. He witnessed Yolka's first steps but he refuses to tell anyone, lest he ruin the magic for Shelda.
Snorpy
Babysitting Comfort: 1/5
Fun Level: 1/5
Shelda's trust in them: 2/5
And now, categorically the worst possible choice, yet still more likely to be chosen over Cromdo. Snorpy is absolutely convinced that Yolka is secretly a Grumpinati spy robot, and would rather be as far away from her as possible. If he's in charge of her, he'll just set her down somewhere and watch her intently to make sure she doesn't start shooting lasers out of her eyes or something. Yolka doesn't like him.
Floofty
Babysitting Comfort: 2/5
Fun Level: 5/5
Shelda's trust in them: 1/5
If anyone is asked to babysit Yolka less than Cromdo, it's Floofty. For a long time, Floofty was only interested in Yolka due to the curious circumstances of her birth, but after studies determined that she was just a normal grumpling, it was already too late. Floofty is Yolka's favorite babysitter. She absolutely loves them, and the feeling... isn't exactly mutual, but Floofty does get a thrill out of "babysitting" Yolka when they know Shelda doesn't want them to. They're both menaces.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk
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rotisseries · 5 months
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inspired by elli's poll lol cause this seems fun actually but if you guys have bad answers I'll kill myself on your doorstep or smth
#“rori all of these are your faves how can there be a bad answer” well I still have an internal ranking on some of these#and if all of you pick an option that I think pales in comparison to the others. well. hm#I know what's gonna sweep though because two of these are niche as hell and 4 maybe 5 of these are things you people don't follow me for#fun fact I actually had to scrape my brain to make sure I couldn't come up with any more#I am unintentionally very picky on what is a favorite apparentlyyyy#I also just don't watch/read enough stuff these days so there's that#AND I NEED LONG TERM EXPOSURE TO KNOW THEY'RE STICKING AROUND#so like. I have some options but I don't KNOWWW if they're sticking yet#but this feels like such a small poll lmao#also no sapphics on here this is actually cause I hate women-#NO. JOKING. zelink is here. I almost put gideon and harrow but I'm in a perpetual state of not having finished tlt#and I couldn't put nebetta and darya I was drawing the line at 2 tbos ships. well. actually. changed my mind#not editing these tags actually you guys can see my thought process#WAIT AND SAYMARI. FUCK. I LITERALLY MADE A PLAYLIST FOR THEM I LOVE THEMMM#ok. is 4 tbos ships too many. hmm#I said 2 of these are niche now four of these are niche it's really the “which tbos pairing is your fave” poll#THIS POLL IS SO FUNNY IT'S SO SELF INDULGENT I HAVE TO TAKE OUT AT LEAST ONE TBOS SHIP#I should add one more general one...#cause I do actually want genuine and varied answers I gotta give y'all options so they don't all pool at the first two#I also almost put ellie and abby on here.. that would've been so funny four popular 1 rarepair 3 super niche ships#ellie and abby are soooo interesting to me though so of course the thought of them having something horrible going on together compels me#and they are one of my 3 favorited ao3 tags... they deserve a place...#ok well while I debate on that I'm putting akutagawa and atsushi on here I admittedly have only had like two months of exposure to them#but it is enough I can tell they are so crazy to me#the way my tags are just me overthinking everything on what is supposed to be a fun and silly poll... no one does it like me I'm afraid
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milflewis · 3 months
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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it#my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with#and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l#lovely?#bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am#glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone#since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life#he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even#harder now. in others he is easier.#he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken#about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better#my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he#hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his#personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the#nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off#he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he#still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay#long when you call in to see her?#whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael.#not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart#i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him
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bbeelzemon · 1 year
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star wars rewatch idea: take a shot every time someone falls into some kind of hole or shaft
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hirokiyuu · 2 years
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on the topic of exocolonist characterization stuff i like probably one of my absolute faves is this really really small thing from vace.... during his 50 event he asks if u’d wanna go into space one day and no matter what u say he agrees w/u. like if ur like “no way” he goes “yeah me neither im a soldier ill stay” but if u go “yeah!” he goes on and on agreeing its v fun... i really like that aspect of his character
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soraeia · 5 months
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@liroyalty replied to your post “Fun Moon Ideas Discussed in Chat”:
Late af but am I still allowed to pitch the 'Luneunte being the mother of the moons as per the meaning of her name' idea?
Oh, go for it! That's a really cool idea, and I did have the small thought of them being like a family, too. Though it might also clash with the 'lovers' idea, where two of the moons are in love with each other, so that may make things weird asdasds
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born-to-lose · 9 months
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How did House of 1000 Corpses traumatize me lmao
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