#but this is still very interesting topic to discuss

[thewayuarent]

Ways of handling addictions in Only Friends

Tw: drug abuse, overdose

Let me tell this straight away - I was in a relationship with addicted person. By the time we started dating they didn’t use drugs for about couple of months by still used alcohol a lot. They’d come a long way to be clean and I was there all the time every time. This year they collapsed. Drug overdose, the end of it.

So I know that my personal experience doesn’t make me a profi automatically. Addiction is a very complex subject and very personal experience. But I do know a thing or two about it.

And the first rule here is: addicted person will never stop because of you. They need to want it for themselves.

By this moment we’ve been shown three different dynamics where one person is addicted and the other isn’t: Sand and Ray, Mew and Ray and Mew and Top.

Start with Mew and Ray. The thing is, Mew has no obligation to save Ray. He was there for him in the worst moment and, yes, I really want to say that he had to do more for Ray - he is his closest friend and he is definitely struggling - but. But Mew has a right to step away. Because navigating someone through healing is very hard and very long process and Mew doesn’t have to deal with it. I can’t blame him honestly for that.

For what I can critique not Mew specifically but the whole friend group (all four of them yes) is the very next scene where them all - including Ray - are drinking. Like guys, Ray right here tried to overdose, may be it would be nice to have a fucking break?

The Mew and Top situation is way different. Mew finds out Top uses drugs - that’s not the best thing to learn about someone, sure. But Mew doesn’t take time to think about “do I need that in my life” (which would be understandable), no. He makes a statement: stop using drugs and I’ll have sex with you. There is your price by the way. And this is also understandable - it is a manipulation, yes, but it’s very common way to try to handle things like that, and I would argue Mew has good intentions here. And oh, Mew, my boy, I’m sorry but that’s not how things work. You know Top can have more in a phone call, right? You understand that person saying “I’m not an addict” while having a dose in his pocket it’s at least a bit shady? I know that it doesn’t automatically implicates that Top is a hard addict but still.

But he is already lying about it. Using drugs while having fun with your friends it’s not the same thing as calling your dealer and using it alone in your room because you struggle with emotions, just saying.

Making him choose will never work out. Because he will choose, and it won’t be you.

And what’s about Sand and Ray? Sand knows for a fact that Ray has problems with alcohol. He doesn’t know about drugs, at least for now. Sand and Ray know each other for a very short period of time, and Sand is “it’s not my business” type of person, so I don’t criticize him while saying the next thing. But.

Sand is unintentionally supportive of Ray’s addictions. He drinks with him a lot - they are drinking buddies. I can’t be sure but it’s kind of looks like there will be a weed smoking next episode? For Sand drinking time to time and smoking weed can be fine - he is not addicted (by what we know). For Ray it is a call. So of course Sand, so as Mew, has a whole right to live his life without dealing with Ray’s addictions. But they are definitely falling for each other. That can develop into relationship. And then it will suddenly be a problem. But isn’t it already? How will Ray react if Sand suddenly turns from drinking/smoking with him to trying to stop him? I would say not the best way. There is also an option that for Sand it won’t be a problem so we’ll see.

The addiction is not a verdict. Both Top and Ray are young and very rich and it’s a very common thing for young rich people to have some kind of stuff - drugs, alcohol or both. It doesn’t automatically mean they are doomed. But still whoever decides to be in relationship with them (Mew and Sand, talking to you) have to think about it and think hard. Do you understand what are you dealing with? Do you honestly want to deal with it? Are you ready for all of highs and lows you’re going to face? If yes, then good luck to you - it really can work out. But don’t fool yourself into thinking that there is nothing to worry about.

#i ​know I may see things way darker than I should due to my personal trauma #but this is still very interesting topic to discuss #only friends #only friends the series #ofts #only friends meta #sandray #topmew #raymew #tw: drug abuse #tw: overdose

[linagram]

[ 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜' 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜 ]

here they are!! finally!!

okay, so at first i thought that i should add something like "part 1", since this post will include only the guilty trio's side characters, but i thought about it and.. i don't really think i should make profiles for other side characters too? most side characters are just the family members (like asahi's adoptive father or eiko's mother) or they're those prisoners' friends (riku's friends/bandmates, reina's friends, etc) and i don't want to make profiles for all those friend groups.

but we'll see! maybe i'll just drop some family/friends lore when i feel like it.

Side character 001: Saito Arata

Name: Saito Arata (斎藤新) (his last name means "purification, worship" and his first name means "fresh, new")

Age: 17 y/o

Gender: Male

Birth date: March 23rd (Aries)

Height: 176 cm

Blood type: AB

Occupation: High school student (first year)

Personality: Arata is an interesting and unpredictable person. It's hard to tell what's going on inside his head, but he always looks like he's up to no good. He does whatever he wants and whenever he wants and he doesn't care what others say. He's very chill and relaxed most of the time and there's only a few things that can make him angry. He's very talkative and outgoing, but he still has no friends.. Or maybe he has one, if you can call that boy his friend. It's hard to impress someone like Arata, so if you manage to do that, don't be surprised if he suddenly becomes obsessed with you and starts basically worshipping you. But also.. don't be surprised when he just as suddenly decides that he doesn't find you interesting anymore and leaves you. His interests change all the time, he can't control it. And also, even if you are like a god to him, it doesn't mean that he will forget about everything else. He's not as loyal as he likes to make people believe. Also, what's the point of being so obsessed with someone if he actually has more power than anyone else here?

Trivia:

Arata's grades aren't that good and one of the reasons why he started to like Akio is the younger boy agreeing to let him copy his homework.

Arata doesn't look exactly like Riku, but they share some other traits, like age, zodiac sign, blood type, being taller than Akio and having dark hair. Also, Riku not looking like an exact copy of Arata and Akio still liking him because of how much he reminds him of his follower can be explained as Akio missing Arata too much.

Arata is a year older than most of his classmates, but there's not any particular reason for that.

Arata really likes animals that are considered to be weird, dangerous or scary by most people and he was obsessed with insects and dinosaurs when he was a child (he still is). He also has a huge shark plushie in his room, but it's not cute at all and it's actually kinda creepy. When Akio found out about that interest of his, he tried to find as much information as possible, so that he could impress Arata with his knowledge later.

Arata actually didn't care about Akio that much when he first met him, he only had to spend time with him for reasons I can't talk about yet, but as he kept learning more about him and what kind of person he is, he started to admire him and be truly supportive of him.

Arata knew Akio's victim well not only because of them all being classmates, but also because Akio's victim really wanted to be friends with Akio and that annoyed Arata even back when he wasn't interested in Akio (or at least he thought so). When he fully turned into Akio's follower, he did everything to make his victim's life worse: from stealing his medications to "accidentally" pushing him down the stairs. Akio actually didn't need to try and "manipulate" Arata to kill the poor boy for him, Arata would do it anyway sooner or later.

If you remember, the silhouettes' eyes in Akio's MV were green (meaning envy and jealousy) and only one of them had pink eyes (meaning love and genuine support). Yes, those other figures are Akio's classmates and the pink-eyed figure is supposed to be Arata.. but only in this particular MV (symbolism, am I right), because in real life, as you have probably already noticed, Arata has heterochromia and one of his eyes is pink, meanwhile his other eye is green. And yes, I've made his eyes like that on purpose.

Remember how Akio mentioned in his interrogation that he's okay with anything his mother cooks, but something was crossed out? He actually wanted to write "anything Arata cooks", but quickly changed it to his mother, because he found it too embarrassing and he didn't want the guards to ask about Arata. The funniest thing about this is that Arata actually can't cook at all and he just bought random food and then he was like "Yeah, I've made it for you, do you like it? <3". It worked though and Arata had to hold his laugh every single time because Akio genuinely believed him.

Side character 005: Mikazuki Ruka

Name: Mikazuki Ruka (朏 瑠日) (his last name means "crescent moon" and his first name means "lapis lazuli" and "sun")

Age: 21 y/o

Gender: Male

Birth date: May 19th (Taurus)

Height: 164 cm

Blood type: A

Occupation: Unemployed

Personality: Ruka wishes people would just.. ignore him or pretend he's not here. He doesn't like talking to people and finds it exhausting. Even simply being around people is too much for him. No, actually, everything is too much for him. Getting up in the morning or even simply eating or breathing is too much work for him. It would be nice if he had someone who could just.. do all of that for him. He'd be okay with doing anything in return for that.. well, if it's not too exhausting. Ah, and if this doesn't sound too weird yet, Ruka has this interesting habit of saying that he's actually dead if anyone asks him to do something he's too lazy to do or simply asks him a question about his past or how he's feeling right now. He often says something like "'Cause I'm dead" in the end of his sentences. He never explains why he does that and it seems much more serious than just him trying to come up with an excuse not to talk about something or not to do something. Maybe it's because he genuinely feels like he's actually a corpse and that's why he's always so tired?.. Ah, but don't think that he's always so cold and emotionless. He's actually very expressive, but only around one specific person.

Trivia:

Ruka's voice is very androgynous and most of the time people have to ask him about his gender. It doesn't help that he has a unisex name as well. And when someone asks him or thinks he's a girl, he simply shrugs and goes "I'm dead anyway, so it doesn't matter". He often wears skirts and dresses too.

Speaking of that habit of his, at first Kei thought that Ruka suffers from "Cotard's syndrome", a condition in which the person thinks that they're actually dead or don't have any blood or organs, but he has soon found out that Ruka knows perfectly well that he's alive, he just likes to think that he's dead, a walking corpse or even a zombie.

Ruka stopped growing when he was 14 years old and he still looks very young and people often mistake him for a teenager. When Kei first met him in a night club, he actually got worried and wondered how this kid was allowed in here. Ruka kinda likes the fact that he looks so young, since "it proves that he really has died and stopped aging".

Ruka is much more talkative around Kei in general. And just so you understand, he wasn't a "poor innocent guy who Kei has kidnapped and tortured in his basement", he was free to go anywhere he wanted to (without leaving the house, of course) and do anything that he wanted. He even made fun of Kei and made jokes like "Ah, do you like me for my childlike appearance or something? You're even more of a creep than I've thought" (Kei punched him right after that and made him take his words back because even he got uncomfortable after hearing that) and "Just beat me up and take as many photos as you want already, I wanna go to sleep as soon as we're done". He even teased him and said things like "What, is this everything you've got?" while Kei tortured him. Kei absolutely did horrible things to him, but Ruka still had more freedom than it was shown in Kei's MV and even though he's still a victim of kidnapping, he actually kind of enjoyed the process because he thought he was finally about to die for real.

The outfit that he's shown wearing has sun and moon motifs which is a reference to his name meaning. I wanted his name to be related to both sun and moon to show that he's Kei's "sun and moon", that meaning that he's Kei's everything.

According to Ruka, he doesn't have any parents or siblings and he also hates when people ask him about them. He still had a friend group (he didn't care about them at all) and he actually was basically forced to come with them to that night club from Kei's MV. They have still spent a lot of time explaining that he really is an adult This is how Kei and Ruka met and Kei went "Oh.. He's just like me fr.."

It's hard to explain what kind of relationship Kei and Ruka had, since it's hard to call them friends and they weren't really a couple. Their relationship had platonic, romantic and sexual elements, but they still had no idea who they are to each other and they mostly just treated each other like an artist and a muse at first before they started to become closer.

Side character 008: Kanasawa Takame

Name: Kanasawa Takame (金沢喬女) (her last name means "gold" and "swamp, stream" and her first name means "high, noble" and "woman")

Age: 31 y/o

Gender: Female

Birth date: November 16th (Scorpio)

Height: 170 cm

Blood type: O

Occupation: Maid cafe manager

Personality: Takame is a polite and gentle woman who is always very kind to everyone, especially her employees. She has a very good reputation and everyone knows her as a caring and understanding person who never lets her employees overwork themselves and if she sees someone making them uncomfortable, she will make sure to take care of that and protect them. She's quite passionate about anime, manga and games and that's.. uh.. one of the reasons why she decided to open a maid cafe. What about the other reasons? Haha, you don't have to know that. Maybe this woman really does have a dark side, but only one of her workers knows about it. And that worker still loves her no matter what.

Trivia:

Takame secretly has a thing for cute girls in maid outfits and that's a second reason why she opened a maid cafe.

Takame really does have a secret second job and her being a cafe manager is just something she does to hide her secrets and make herself look like a normal person who doesn't do anything illegal.

Unlike other two side characters who actually liked their prisoners, she didn't have any feelings for Yurika and just manipulated her because she knew that Yurika is the only worker who would agree to help with something like Takame's second job and she knew that Yurika really needs someone to rely on, so she promised she will take care of everything that Yurika has problems with. She thought that Yurika is cute, but that's all.

Takame really does like anime, manga and games and that's not something she made up. She believes that no matter how old you are, you should still do what you like, even if other people judge you for it.

She knew everything about Yurika's past and her problems and she knew about Yurika's relationship with her victims. She used that information to make Yurika trust her, but no matter how manipulative she was, she actually did protect Yurika from her stalkers and people who harassed her. Of course, that made Yurika like her even more, but when Takame did that, she genuinely wanted to protect Yurika because she didn't want her to go through anything like that.

#most facts are just about their relationships with their prisoners but if i tried to talk more about their backstories and personalities #it would be way too long and i also want to discuss those topics later so yeah #feel free to ask questions about them though! #no arata doesn't actually have an akio itabag BUT IF HE COULD MAKE/BUY AKIO MERCH HE WOULD #i really really like his dynamic with akio especially bc i know arata's backstory so i'm like. HHHHH THEY'RE SO INTERESTING #yes i can't believe i'm saying this but. kei and ruka's dynamic is kinda cute if you think about it #OF COURSE IT DOESN'T EXCUSE THE KIDNAPPING AND TORTURING AND BASICALLY BRAINWASHING HIM AND ALL THAT STUFF #but still it's very interesting how kei likes ruka bc he acts like kei's real self meanwhile ruka likes him because he makes him feel alive #and in a good way and he doesn't want to say that he's dead when that happens #also when i started working on lineart and looked at takame i realized that she reminds me of shidou's wife and i screamed #LIKE I THINK SHE DOESN'T HAVE THOSE VIBES NOW THAT THE DRAWING IS DONE BUT STILL #(yurika simping for shidou's wife is a hilarious concept though) #i don't know if these guys will have their own tags but again we'll see #i'll just tag their prisoners for now #👑prisoner 001: miyagawa akio👑 #🍓prisoner 005: sanada kei 🍓 #🎀prisoner 008: maruyama yurika 🎀 #(and yes i used a chain brush for ruka listen i got lazy IT WAS SO HARD TO DRAW THIS GUY FOR SOME REASON) #(AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN HIS FULL DESIGN YET.)

[feluka]

critical role is the single most frustrating and annoying fandom to be in when you care enough about a character/plotline to be mad about hearing the bad takes but once you step away long enough to stop caring it becomes the world's funniest and most entertaining fandom. just witnessed several long and elaborate arguments go down about.. *checks notes* whether or not it's infantalizing to draw a character with glasses. i literally brought a bag of popcorn and went through the notes with glee it's so so much fun to see that stuff when you don't give a damn about the source

#cr is *the* mother fandom for white gays who think everything should cater to them #also my hot take about cr is that the show is at its best when it revolves around ''tropey'' themes like. fighting vampires and dragons #and such. there's nothing that makes these kinds of stories any less beautiful or meaningful and they do it so SO well #when they try to branch into more profound topics like religion and such. i hate to say it but they're clearly not equipped to #to have any sort of meaningful discussion about those. it's so so reductive and shallow and they try their damndest to make it more nuanced #but it's very much not their area in my opinion. #i LOVE stories with religious and political themes but not from cr sorry it just feels shallow when they do it! #they are still excellent actors worth watching even if just for the character moments #but yeah my interest has been waning recently with the most recent arc and the characters having the dullest takes on religion #i haven't watched for the last couple of months though so maybe they'll prove me wrong

[bmpmp3]

(falls to the floor holding my head in my hands) i can't keep making all my ocs the same vaguely eastern european vaguely indo carribean mixed race guy i cant keep doing this

(looks up. eyes glowing red. levitating with unknown power) or can i..................................................

#sorry to be mixed on main again but im working on some rough draft ocs. i saw myself making the same dude again. i keep making him. #i know as a kid with a combination of the classic mixed kid feelings of alienation as well as being really really into cartoons #i vowed to myself that I SHALL make all the mixed race cartoon characters since i wasnt seeing much in the cartoons i loved #it was a little dire in like 2008 when i vowed this. its less dire now #maybe i can rest.....or maybe not...maybe its still more dire than i think............ #im in an interesting place rn living in a somewhat diverse area attending a pretty multicultural university so i got used to #kind of blending into the crowd but recently i was in an art history class. like one of the first i had been in person in years #(you know how it is) and outside of my vaguely ambiguous situation there was like one other non white person #and everyone else was white. and it became very apparent how white the class was very quickly because as art history students #race is kinda like. a big thing in visual culture studies HJKFKJLSDJD and like they meant well but it was getting a little dire because #so many of my white peers kept centering whiteness and white discomfort in like every discussion or brushing past the topic entirely #im biased because race is one of my main interests in art history but MAN i was like. oh god. i need to. intervene #gotta be more annoying about being mixed race in class. rolls up sleeves #gotta bring up every uncomfortable topic about representation and perception and power and dehumanization and intersectionality that i can #because no one else but me the other student of colour and the professors even think about it orz #sorry i know its obvious but sometimes it doesnt quite hit me that like. oh god. do white people really not think about any of this? #at all? unless its brought up? not even a little bit? i dunno its just kinda alien to me orz but i shall keep going #i shall continue on with my deep interest in orientalism within art history and its impacts we see daily #and also making the same guy in my funny little cartoons DJSKHJKSJFKD #(jkjkjk i dont JUST make that same vaguely beige guy. i also make a bunch of other guys. who are also mostly all multiracial too HGKJDHJFR) #(its what i do. its what i do)

[musical-chick-13]

Very, very tempted to just release this idea out into the ether and go, "I do not have the time to write this, but if anyone wants to claim it, feel free," but I would NOT trust the average person to handle this well.

#yes I AM thinking too hard about dn-where-everyone-but-the-protagonist-is-a-woman-and-it's-an-examination-of-misogyny again #but like. we've seen how fandom deals with female characters. and we've seen how fandom deals with any actual discussion of misogyny. #which is to say that they deal with both of those topics VERY poorly. historically the chances of this being done well would be very small #(ugh how many times can I use the word 'very' in this post and its tags lmao) #(thinking about that one poll I follow where it's specifically about which fictional ladies are most maligned based on misogynistic reasons #and so much of the sent-in propaganda is...STILL drenched in misogyny. truly op is fighting for their life over there) #ANYWAY I think this (almost-genderbent-dn) is a very interesting idea and I so much want it to exist but I do not want ANY #of general fandom touching it. #I gotta shut myself up I'm starting to get too attached to a version of canon that doesn't exist

[theaterism]

slams my hands gently on the counter. thread where fox talks abt his orientation when

#|☆| ooc #(LISTEN……….) #(he’s uncertain abt discussing this part of himself but i do think it would be very interesting) #(charlie is the only one he has Somewhat spoken to abt it and she didn’t rlly give him a choice in the matter agdgd) #(i just think it would be nice if he could Talk abt it bc it’s taken him a very long time to figure himself out in terms of this!) #(and he still doesn’t quite know how to wrap his mind around it!) #(and just…. i love Significant Conversation threads okay they’re very good agsgs) #(fox dodges talking seriously abt himself in general and typically nudges the topic away from himself) #(so i appreciate any thread where he Does talk abt himself a bit more!) #(character dev…….)

[chuchayucca]

Discussions of implied fictional CSA & SA

I recently been wondering if there’s a chance Richard thinks Roy’s aggressive and distant behavior is normal and not a sign of CSA because he acted similarly to Roy when he was younger

Reasonings in the tags

#Again TW for discussion/mentions of CSA/SA #I believe Richard was repeatedly SA by his brother throughout his childhood and early teenage years #He never realized it was SA because no one told him and pre-existing misinformation and harmful beliefs about SA #He unknowingly developed bad behaviors and coping mechanism from his CSA in his teenage years but nothing was really done #The school thought he was a rowdy troublemaker. His parents didn’t do jack to help him even after discovering the abuse because they- #worried more their reputations. And his friends didn’t know about the abuse either so they thought he was a rowdy kid and sometimes #Feed into his bad behaviors because they were dumb teenagers looking to have fun in the stupidest ways possible and not thinking of the- #consequences or why a kid like Richard was so mean and aggressive in the first place #I know this is a very sensitive topic and the fandom has all right to be hesitant about seeing how Roy’s truama was treated and #certain individuals approaching it terribly #However I don’t think the majority of the fandom understands how Roy’s SA is an integral part of his character. not only because it’s an- #canon explantation for his behavior but also being SA impacts EVERYTHING. how you look at the world. behaviors. relationships. etc #imo it’s feels weird to ignore it even if the original source treated it questionable #I am interested and do want to explore Roy’s story and the probable story of Richard too #Not only is it an integral part of Roy’s character that should be acknowledge more but also there’s an interesting story to tell about- #CSA/SA. how it affects everybody. and the different interpretations that can be written from it #I’m really interested in seeing a fanfic where Roy and Richard addressed their truama together. learn to heal. and become closer by the end #That being said I want to make it clear that when discussing these topics I still want to be respectful #If I ever handle it wrong or go to far. let me know. and if you have criticism for me regarding this. let me know too! #Again this is a very sensitive topic and I don’t want to contribute to the harm #spooky month #spooky month roy #spooky month richard #tw csa mention #tw csa #tw sa mention #tw sa implied #tw csa implied #tw sa #ChuchaYucca.text

[labs]

Another idea: Communities on Tumblr

For a while now folks have asked us for better ways to connect with other people who share similar interests. We’re listening, and at Labs we’ve been looking into fulfilling that need, Tumblr style.

Introducing Communities, a new place to connect with others on Tumblr:

Here in Labs, we’re working on big ideas that could transform how Tumblr is used, while keeping that Tumblr vibe alive. You can see one of those ideas above. We’re calling it “Communities”, a new dedicated space on Tumblr for people to share and discuss all the content they love. Communities can cover topics like your favorite show, artist, movie, video game, your school, your board game group, friend group, big or small, whatever you want.

Each Community has their own semi-private safer space away from the regular dashboard where you can interact with other Tumblr users who share the same interests and passions as you. There are moderators and members (you!), rules, and privacy settings. Each community has its own feed of posts from members, separate from your Following and For You feeds. Interactions within community spaces stay there and replies will work more like a traditional comment section. Folks will be able to reblog posts into a community, but not out — at least not yet.

We’re very excited for you to try it, and help define the best path forward. What we have is a prototype to help us validate the idea, but there’s still plenty of questions that need answering. Over the next couple of weeks, we’ll be reaching out to people across Tumblr, and the internet at large, to try our prototype. Based on the feedback we get, we’ll iterate on the idea to see what resonates best with all of you on Tumblr.

If this sounds interesting, please like, reblog, or reply to this post, and we’ll invite you to beta test this feature when we roll it out to a wider Tumblr audience, as a little perk for following the Labs blog.

Stay tuned for more!

#tumblr labs #communities

[alstroemerian-dragon]

the tough thing about writing realistic narrative conflict is that. when there aren’t larger sweeping stakes, something like 80% of narrative conflict is predicated on miscommunication or the withholding of information, big or small. and as someone who is both fairly autistic and well trained in conflict resolution, my brain is screaming “WHY DO THEY NOT SIMPLY DISCUSS THINGS OPENLY!!!!!!”

its something im practicing but BOY its hard fkdhfjdhfjs. im having to go “okay what would i say in this situation. now. would this character actually admit that? no. fuck. okay how can i hint towards it without them straight up saying it”

#personal #its an awkward balance to have especially with particular characters #its not necessarily an issue when im writing hajime #both because hes ALSO autistic. and because post shutdown (at least in my brain) hes much more blunt and straightforward #who give a shit about being polite or dancing around words when youre basically a war criminal right #now fuyuhiko is a balance to strike. because when talking to ANYONE ELSE he will say NOTHING about how he really feels unless hes pissed off #or really stressed and running his mouth on accident #now with hajime hes a lot more willing to Discuss Hard Things. however. there are still things he would Never Fucking Say. unless forced #and hajime will force it. eventually #akane is similar to hajime in that shes also very autistic and also just doesnt really care or pay attention to what other people think #but she also has a hard time tackling or discussing more intellectual topics solely because she just. doesnt get them. and also doesnt care #SHES NOT STUPID!!!!! SHE JUST DOESNT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT PHILOSOPHY OR WHATEVER AND THATS FINE #sonias an interesting one because. as a princess she has a LOT of experience talking around things #and so i think she does it just. habitually. pasting on a smile and a pleasant expression and everything is fine #but shes trying really hard to be more open because of hajime and the others. knowing these people are safe to just be her around #its hard bc she spent a year and a half being a military dictator acting on and forcing other people to act on her every sadistic whim #so now shes like ‘i have to be soooooo nice and never cause problems or i’ll die! i’ll simply die’ #now kazuichi. kazuichi would never admit any kind of shit under penalty of death #except for the fact that he can not keep his mouth shut to save his life #so whether he wants to or not he will say what he is thinking at the least opportune moment possible #okay i was gonna say more and i wrote it all out but i reached max tags without finishing #so im just not going to say any more <3 love and peace #i have the most experience writing these five but im slowly expanding #i need to get better at kyoko makoto and byakuya bc theyre vital to the first week of recovery #and i. unfortunately. do not care about the first game very much #so im kinda flying by the seat of my pants with them #i need to make byakuya MORE OF AN ASSHOLE. but in a somewhat affectionate way. bc hes had a little time to grow #but hes still. byakuya togami. so he is an Asshole. #i think ive got naegi down. kyoko’s proving the hardest

[eats-the-stars]

love my coworkers but i’m convinced that 1-3 of them could possibly be part fish, maybe even some kind of freshwater mer-guy(s) because how else can three guys spend an entire 8-hour shift talking about fishing conditions. they were talking about the rain, the mud at the bottom of the lake, fish anatomy that was completely foreign to me, their latest fishing blunders/successes, one involving failure to catch a snapper, something about hiding treats IN the lake, no idea if they meant for fish feeding or their own consumption or how the hell that works, and then some complaints about other fishermen/fishmen in their favorite fishing places/potential living spaces.

#for real tho this conversation started at about 8am and lasted until 4pm when we closed up #and these are not middle-aged dudes living the fishing life #one of them is in high school and the others are like young twenties #honestly tho i really do enjoy catching parts of their fishing conversations #even tho i do not understand half of what they say #it is just very fascinating to me how much they can say about this topic #and really interesting how much you need to know about the local ecosystem #to be able to dedicate so much of a conversation to the weather and water conditions and wildlife status in the area #like you have to be paying a lot of attention to know things like how good the breeding season was in this one lake for one type of fish #also love hearing about really specialist knowledge in areas i'm ignorant #like all the different kinds of lures and baits and stuff. i know a midling amount just bc fishing is super big around here #and my dad and so many relatives really enjoy fishing and i've been fishing plenty of times #but still. tackle boxes are still filled with 80% shiny cool stuff i know nothing about #i really only have experience with live bait and then those shiny little basic rubber worms and squid-looking lures #really prefer the background noise of fishing conversation over sports talk also #that's like the other thing they discuss. nearly always either sports (no idea which one possibly multiple) or fishing #just really enjoy listening to people talk about stuff they all know way better than me #something about the appeal of an interesting and unfamiliar topic #whereas i am more likely to be bored or uninterested in hearing ppl talk about something i'm well-versed in #especially if it's something i clearly know way more about so all i can hear is very basic things i already knew #like yeah i'm familiar with that and i enjoy doing that in my free time but i'd prefer to overhear something new to me #also something something the active awareness that ppl are living full and vibrant lives in ways i can't understand #like 'wow your life is wildly different from mine but clearly still very interesting'

[coco-loco-nut]

Book Club

Pairing: The grid x driver!reader, Lance Stroll x reader

Summary: A wild goose chase ensues when you are at a meeting with your book club

requests are open (plz send some, i can’t keep only getting ideas while driving 🥺) masterlist

————————

“Guys, have you seen y/n?” Lance panics, rushing into the McLaren garage. It’s not the first time his girlfriend had disappeared from her garage but he’s always been able to find you a few steps away.

“She’s missing?” Lando leaped out of his chair. “Come on, Oscar, we gotta find her,” Lando drags his teammate out of the garage, following Lance to the Mercedes garage to find George.

“Any y/n sightings?” a very stressed out Lance asks.

“No, but now I am invested,” the Brit tags along in the search, hopping over to the Ferrari garage.

“Mes amis, you seem stressed,” Charles says, looking up from his book.

“Y/n is missing, Lance can’t find his girlfriend,” Oscar sighs, not sure why he isn’t leaving the group.

“No, we must join the quest, Charles,” Carlos says, clapping his teammate on the shoulder.

“Alright, only for y/n,” Charles, like oscar, begrudgingly agrees to join the ‘noble quest’.

Meanwhile, y/n is sitting on the couch, wearing a chunky cardigan and a pair of fashion glasses, sipping tea.

“No, Lizzy was clearly in love with Darcy even then,” Fernando waves his hands. This month’s book was Pride and Prejudice.

“Sure, Fernando,” Valtteri rolls his eyes.

The book club, affectionately called ‘The Old Drivers Club’ started when y/n barged into the Haas garage, claiming she needed their opinions and that she was tired of all the young drivers. Despite her being only 21, she found a home with some of the older drivers in the Paddock. The club consisted of her, Fernando, Valtteri, Kevin, and Nico. Lewis wanted to hold on to his youth, as he claimed, and Checo didn’t quite care for their gossip sessions.

“I still don’t understand how you can go from a 20 year old party animal to a 80 year old grandma overnight,” Kevin teases the young girl, bringing up a common point of conversation (usually her complaining about the younger drivers).

“And I don’t understand how you all don’t find Nico attractive? If I was ten years older, I would be all over him. God damn, what a fine man,” you swoon, causing the German to blush fiercely.

“Yes, yes, someone who could outshine Charles Leclerc in his prime,” Fernando dismisses it with the wave of his hand. You giggle and refocus on the book discussion.

“Nando,” you prompt him, silently asking him to go to the next topic.

“Alright, alright, let’s discuss what was probably y/n’s favorite scene, the confession scene. The second one, not in the rain,” Fernando says, and you shyly look down, the older drivers knowing you too well.

“Max, Checo, have you seen y/n?” Lance asks, even more flustered, half the grid behind him.

“Y/n? Why do you ask?” Max says, looking at his teammate.

“She’s missing!” Lando exclaims causing Checo to laugh.

“No, no. She’s with her book club, in the Haas motor home. I sometimes join them, interesting gossip, but not quite for me, no,” Checo says, looking oddly at the group.

“Her- her book club?” Lance asks, utterly confused.

“Si. Lewis has been invited too, but he claims he is too young,” Checo laughs to himself.

“Sorry mate, a book club?” George asks, a little offended he was never invited.

“And gossip? I’m a little offended I’ve never been invited,” Pierre gasps.

“Well? Is that all,” Max asks, wanting the group to leave his garage.

“Right, well I guess we go to Haas,” Carlos says, quickly thanking the Red Bull drivers.

“VALTTERI!” Your astonished gasp is heard from outside. Your group had moved on to what some think is the more enjoyable part of the evening, the gossip.

“Y/n! Oh thank god, we were worried sick,” Lando dramatically says at the doorway, having opened the door, revealing your group. The five of you look at the other group wildly confused.

“Worried sick?” You ask, looking at them.

“You were missing, I couldn’t find you,” Lance scratches the back of his neck, a little confused.

“I,” you pause before laughing. “Lancelot, you could’ve texted me,” you tell him.

“Why weren’t Pierre and I invited?” George asks, looking accusingly at your group.

“You don’t fit the criteria,” Kevin says, dismissing the question.

“And y/n does?” Pierre asks.

“Yes. When she sits upside down on your couch to gossip and complain about you all, and ask for life advice, then we might consider it,” Nico shakes his head.

“She is the founder of our group,” Valtteri points out.

“You also have to find young Nico attractive, more than current Charles,” Fernando teases, causing the young girl to blush.

“He was!” You defend yourself, and Carlos nods in agreement.

“Your girlfriend, mate. I’m surprisingly glad I tagged along,” Oscar says to Lance, pretty amused at the chaos.

“Out of curiosity, what is your next book?” George asks, your face lighting up.

“We are on a classics kick right now, so we are reading the No Fear version of Romeo and Juliet,” you say excitedly causing George and Charles to groan.

“We can’t join?” Charles asks again.

“Sorry, Leclerc, only room for one hot driver here,” Nico winks at you, causing your cheeks to redden.

“HEY!” most of the drivers in the room take offense to it, Lance mainly because the wink was directed at his girlfriend.

“Alas, if only you didn’t have a wife and kid, and I was ten years older,” you sigh, shaking your head.

“In another life, Mein Liebchen,” Nico sighs as well.

“Alright, I’m stealing back my girlfriend,” Lance pulls you away.

“Lancelot,” you giggle, waving goodbye to your book club.

“It is in these moments that I remember how young she is and how old we are,” Fernando sighs, Lewis taking your seat.

“My bones ache more and more each day, mate,” Lewis shakes his head.

“Welcome to our club, have the first act read by the next race,”

#f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 imagines #the grid x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x female driver #lance stroll #f1 drivers #f1 grid x reader #f1 grid #lance stroll x reader #lando being dramatic #lando norris #george russell #valtteri bottas #fernando alonso #oscar piastri #nico hulkenberg #kevin magnussen #carlos sainz #charles leclerc #max verstappen #checo perez #lewis hamilton

[mrfoox]

Wtf is my fascination with this little freak.... Hes just a dude but I'm so intrigued, I'm tired

#miranda talking shit #Its been two years but i still dont understand him so im guessing thats why #Tbf we didnt become closer until a year ago or something so yeah. But since day one i just felt like it was something with him and now im #Frustrated. Hes literally just a dude. Yet my brain find him so fascinating. I know i in general am very interested in people i like #But this guy man... I think it might be because i can understand him and thus cant predict him? My brain does love a mystery. #I mean i had an fairly intense period of 3-6 months where i was super fascinated by fabian. I still kinda am but now i think #I understand how he works over all so i do not feel the intense need to ask him all kinds of things and analyze? Bc now i have an decent #Idea of how he works. Meanwhile this little freak is almost the opposite of me in everything and i just want to study him. I think in a way #He reminds me of myself at least in the way of 'dealing' with mental problems etc. Or rather my past self. So i want to challenge him to do #It differently. I dont think i have an savior conplex or something when it comes to him bc i do basically not... Tell him to change? #I dont think i could change him. So thats not what my fascination comes from... But holy shit i just want to talk with him about everything #Also probably why i like him that he will answer any questions i ask. No topic has been bad or too weird and i appriciate that in others #But nah. Never been this intrested in someone whos this diffrent than me ever. I always need to have something major in common for a strong #Intrest. But here its like... We are both introverts ... And both social actors/pretenders... Otherwise our similarities are pretty small #I really wish i knew exactly why my brain is so intrested in him . I think its my hyperfixation being activated unfortunately. #Technically he have a lot of things/traits i dont like? But still i dont find him annoying or something? #Many things i dont agree or have the same opinion as him on. But i just find it refreshing ? Maybe its bc i basically havent known anyone #Like him. Hes not the type of person i attract or even put my time into i think. That's why ive told him we'd not be friends if we didn't #Meet this way. I would probably not have wanted to talk to him and i cant see him wanting to talk to me. Especially if we met when younger #No way teen Miranda would not go near him iajdjfjskskd id like to discuss this with him but im scared to scare him and scared to learn #Something bad or him not caring for me or something. I know he doesnt care about many things so id not be suprised but #Fuck this guy. I wamt to obsess over a video game instead where there are wikis to read /:

[sfznyxio]

❝ 𝐈, 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐍 ❞

𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. everyone says you’re the curse of your own legacy. dubbed “the worst ruler ever in history”, power is all you cared about. your selfishness leads to the downfall of your own kingdom, with you murdered at the hands of people you thought could be trusted. somehow the next day, you regress to the day you become the sole successor to the throne after the previous sovereign passed. can you prove your worth and show them you have what it takes to be the sovereign in this timeline?

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒. argenti, bronya, dan heng, dr. ratio, gepard, jing yuan, ruan mei, sunday, trailblazer (caelus & stelle)

𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓. f!reader. royal au, time travel au. angst, hurt/comfort, fluff. 1.9k words. inspired by billion manhwas that have this trope lol. the royal family is absolutely horrible and reader hates them. reader experiences dissociative amnesia due to trauma from said family and the previous timeline. lots of self-doubt. death is everywhere in this fic. a dark joke about betrayal (bronya). reader has hair (gepard). murder of a loved one and revenge (sunday).

𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐀. new year, new blog, and new fic but two months later! on spring break so i’m happy i got to write again, even if it’s just a little bit. watch me disappear for another six months or so because grad school’s a bitch.

𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈.

rumor has it among a group of chivalrous knights from a forgotten land that their deity, the god of beauty idrila, is in your kingdom. you happen to come across one of them when you snuck out of the castle. the knight introduces himself as argenti, a knight of beauty… a very strange one.

what person talks to objects as if they’re people and compliments them that they’re beautiful? as soon as he lays on you, he’s in front of you on one knee and kisses your hand, declaring that you’re beautiful, even as beautiful as idrila themself. surely you’re weirded out, but he seems sincere. 

there’s a possibility that your advisor sent a search party after you. you generally hate being escorted on your outings due to your upbringing, but going back there isn’t where your mind wants to be, so you ask the knight if he could be your company. ah, how could he resist a beautiful lady like yourself?

will he still see you as such when you ascend the throne?

𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐘𝐀.

house rand is known for their strong military leadership and is a unique case of nobility. majority of its lineage are commoners, going through a selection process as children to be adopted by the current leader and be trained as their successor. shortly before your ascension, former leader cocolia rand passed away. no one knows the cause of death, except her daughter.

marchioness bronya pays a visit to introduce herself as the new leader of the house. the two of you express condolences for your families, though you try not to flinch at how she praises the late sovereign like everyone else. she believes you can keep secrets well, which isn’t entirely wrong, so she asks to borrow you. you already know the topic of discussion: the actual cause of death of madam cocolia.

it’s me. her dialogue muffles into white noise. madam cocolia has made a deal with her daughter to kill her if anything happens. hm…? did you put trust in someone to stop you if you ever went insane? can you stab me in the back if that’s the case? your mouth runs on its own, and she’s in shock. you brush it off as a joke afterwards, saying she should ignore it. yet you can’t yourself as it’s been haunting you since.

do you trust her to end your suffering, for the good of the kingdom?

𝐃𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐆.

the archivist strikes you as someone who dislikes bothersome people, so you try not to spend too much time researching your condition. though upon meeting dan heng at the library, he appears courteous and doesn’t mind your company. what leaves you puzzled is that he doesn’t question your sudden interest in time travel and regression. instead, he leads you upstairs.

on the way there you trip and he grabs onto you, triggering a flashback of the mob capturing you with tight holds during your escape. realizing the intensity of his grip on you because your body’s shaking, he lets go and adjusts his hand placement to your back so you can get up. then he makes sure you’re alright before reaching the data bank.

he assumes that you’re still traumatized from your family’s death based on your reaction to that memory. everyone believes the same thing, and it’s definitely wrong. but you can’t magically convince them that you’ve seen the future where they’ll die because of you. however, his intentions make you feel at ease. he says he’ll be nearby for help. is it really okay to rely on someone else for once?

will he stick to his word and catch you when you fall to your death?

𝐃𝐑. 𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎.

the intelligentsia guild believes that knowledge is a valuable resource to obtain various mediums of information across the world. having one of their own at the castle not only as a professor at the royal academy, but as the advisor to the next sovereign is quite an honor. dr. ratio may be a brilliant scholar, but his interpersonal skills… not so much.

there isn’t a day where you’re spared from his lectures. to be fair, you’ve done questionable things after your family’s passing: sneaking out of the castle, researching time travel and regression, and raising raccoons that almost destroyed your garden and your servants’ sanities. nevertheless, you’re irritated by his emphasis on your reputation as a ruler. does it look like i want to be one? you storm out without a second thought.

after calming down, you search for him to apologize. you should’ve told him about how you felt instead of letting out an outburst. unfortunately he has gone home, but leaves a note that addresses your “odd hobbies” - ways to not alert the servants during your escapades, literature of topics of interest that aren’t in the library, and interventions of minimizing the chaos of your familiars. you take it as an apology; he’s more considerate than you think even if he doesn’t admit it.

can he stay by your side if you decide to abdicate the throne?

𝐆𝐄𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐃.

house landau is the “shield” of the kingdom, serving the royal family for generations. their current leader count landau is a stern man from what you recall the several times you visited him as a child. now he’s forced to retire due to his illness, replaced by his eldest and only son gepard, your childhood friend.

the two of you haven’t interacted much as you reach the training period for succession, whereas his father drills him to be insubordinate to the royal family as they have been. with your parents gone and the count ill, you can see him whenever you wish. but how should you approach him? more importantly, does he still see you as a friend? you give up instantly, exhausted from your mental trip to the past.

amidst the flames, he yells at you to run as shadows consume him. you shoot up - bloodshot eyes, rapid heartbeat, and heavy breaths. a pair of arms engulfs you, one hand rubbing your back and the other buried in your hair. rest, i’m here, he whispers against your forehead. you start to lose it, sobbing uncontrollably on his chest.

is this what giving in to your selfish gains feels like?

𝐉𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘𝐔𝐀𝐍.

the sight of citizens flocking to the plaza can be seen from your balcony. 

three people emerge from the crowd, who you recognize as residents of the civilization in the sky: the xianzhou alliance. they have no reason to be here unless it’s important business, and that happens to be you. how forgetful you are.

earlier you test a theory that hopefully changes your tragic fate. it takes courage to act like a jester in front of the council, sending diplomats to invite various factions to forge alliances. the entire court and yourself are amazed that one of the arbiter-generals jing yuan is here in the flesh. the xianzhou rely on themselves for help rather than outsiders, so there must be something that he wants from you.

little did you know while you’re interested in the xianzhou’s manpower, he’s interested in you. his two attendants have never seen their general smitten over someone before; it’s obnoxious. his visits become frequent; his purpose of seeking specific resources is really an excuse to shower you with gifts. he appreciates how headstrong you are throughout the tragedies you faced, wishing you give yourself more credit. he has faith in your capability as a sovereign, even if you don’t agree. 

he’s not here to play with your feelings, is he?

𝐑𝐔𝐀𝐍 𝐌𝐄𝐈.

house ruan is revered by academia as geniuses of the century, yet rarely shows up in public as they care less about being in the spotlight. rather, they dedicate their lives to science. their daughter carries the household name with grace and elegance, though it can’t be said the same with her experiments in which she entrusts you to be her assistant.

lady ruan mei is interested in the concept of life. cycles of birth, growth, and death. existence of the living. development of cognition, emotions, and behaviors. they’re fascinating to her. creating lifeforms makes you feel some sort of sorrow; your creation is modeled after yourself. then you wonder how your family reacted when you were born.

soon you’re asked by the scientist about your existence, and whether you believe the gods can answer that. now that you think about it, were they involved in your regression? the human race worships the power of the heavens: creation and destruction. death is inevitable, but can the gods also rewrite reality? if they choose to send you back in time, did they want you to redeem yourself?

why bother going so far if you’re going to screw up again?

𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐘.

no one hosts festivities as grand as house oak. under the impression that you’ve been secluded in your room grieving over the previous sovereign, they’ll throw a small party to cheer you up and celebrate your upcoming ascension. the thought of announcing you want to abdicate the throne is tempting, but their efforts will go to waste so you scrap it. might as well keep up a front and plan your next moves.

you’re welcomed into the venue by the high priest sunday, the organizer of this party. you’re feeling nervous, not because of the amount of guests but because of his overwhelming presence. he doesn’t seem familiar, or are you misremembering? do you still feel unwell, your majesty? behind the high priest is a young woman who bears some resemblance to him, and everything all at once falls into place.

his sister is the precious sun of his life, executed by the eclipse. the high priest follows the royal family without hesitation, only for his loyalty to be questioned at her expense. he isn’t the type to act so rash, but for her he’ll go to great lengths to exact his revenge. you lie to the siblings that you’re fine and tell the high priest to take care of her. there’s more than meets the eye regarding your behavior, but he just agrees to not arouse any suspicion.

what secrets have your people been hiding from you?

𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐙𝐄𝐑.

there are twin raccoons that practically live in your garden and are your servants’ worst nightmares. somehow they’re kind of like you - living in luxury while rotten to the core. you remember ordering your servants to exterminate them last time, so you take them instead so you won’t freak them out, much to your advisor’s dismay.

later you discover that caelus and stelle are shapeshifters who lost their memories, with their only lead being a magenta-haired woman. to your surprise they love to gossip, which proves themselves useful to be your spies, gathering intel on the current news that could coincide with the ones in the previous timeline. they can also find information about that woman. killing two birds with one stone. 

sometimes you worry about their work ethic, considering how chaotic they can be. for instance, their unhealthy obsession with trash cans. as much as you need them to get the job done, you realize you’re nothing better than your family. those two are extensions of yourself, learning about the world just as you are. so you step back and let them have fun with scraps. they’ll get to their missions eventually.

they appear to be loyal to a fault so there’s no way they’ll betray you, right?

#♪ .fics #honkai: star rail #honkai: star rail x reader #hsr x reader #argenti x reader #bronya x reader #dan heng x reader #dr ratio x reader #gepard x reader #jing yuan x reader #ruan mei x reader #sunday x reader #trailblazer x reader #caelus x reader #stelle x reader #honkai: star rail angst #honkai: star rail fluff #hsr angst #hsr fluff

[euaphoric]

🕸️ KINKTOBER - DAY 2. 🕸️

Differences

[PAIRING] haechan x f!reader

[GENRE] college au, popular jock x loner, pwp [WARNINGS] angst?, smut, lowkey perv!hc, dry humping, premature ejaculation

summary: haechan was everything you’re not: popular, wealthy, multitalented, and otherworldly attractive. you despise people that get everything handed to them, wanting nothing to do with him— until you get paired up as partners for a project together…

wc -> 2.2k

A/N: so uhhh, this was very much not supposed to be this long but sometimes i just keep going and don’t know when to stop tbh .-. alsoo i hit 1k followers today thanks sm it rlly means a lot 🫶🫶

kinktober m.list

“fuckk, it’s pouring!” you shrill from the sudden heavy downpour, hovering your chemistry textbook over your head which barely shields anything. of course you didn’t predict these weather conditions (and didn’t bother to check your weather app beforehand) so you thought not to bring a jacket. it’s not like it was some light drizzle going on either, it was raining buckets outside— and you were so fucked. you pick up your speed, practically sprinting to the bus stop, completely forgetting that haechan was right behind this whole time. it honestly still hasn’t fully clicked in your mind that you were now lab partners and had to work together for the entire remaning semester. you weren’t thrilled about it, frankly, you were hoping anyone but haechan but since you have the worst possible luck known to existence, you got paired with him by a random draw. now you’re stuck with him for the next 3-4 months…

“damn, i think that’s the first time i’ve ever heard you curse,” haechan quickly catches up with you, taken aback by your choice of language, “wait- here, take this.” he pulls his football letterman jacket off his body, slinging it around your shoulders. “uh- no it’s okay, i’ll be fine.. don’t worry!” you shook your head to refuse but haechan just kept insisting, telling you how he was raised to be a ‘gentleman’ and it’d be morally wrong of him not to offer his jacket to a woman when it’s raining. “just take it y/n, it’s not gonna kill ya!” he promises, only satisfied once you finally cave in after numerous attempts going back and forth. you may have let him win this round but you definitely won’t be going easy on him next time, that’s for certain.

yeah haechan may be nice and all but that doesn’t make him a saint or any different than everyone else, he’s just a regular guy to you, nothing more or less. you’ve known him for a grand total of 2.5 days and on the first day of class you just so happened to be assigned as permanent lab partners with him — the most popular guy at uni practically. haechan was the topic of every girl’s discussion, whether it was wondering if he came from a loaded family, is single or has a girlfriend, or how he can afford a $4,500 pair of sneakers, theres always a spotlight drawn to him somehow. frankly you didn’t give a rat’s ass about any of that stuff, you didn’t care much to make a lot of friends nor socialize with everyone. ever since middle school you’ve preferred to be alone, it’s not something you’re embarrassed about, you just value your education more than temporary friendships.

when it was announced that you’d be partners with haechan word spread around quickly, you couldn’t stand attention being cemented on you but haechan simply thrived off that notion. he craved all the gossip about him because he’s an attention whore— at least, that was your impression of him when you first met. you personally have no interest in getting to know him further than finishing this project, he probably has dozens of girls in his phone he can call to hook up with every day if he wanted to. ‘it’s just for one semester y/n you can do this… you’ll be fine.’ you keep telling yourself over and over. after what felt like ages the bus finally came, saving you from standing in silence with him any longer than necessary. soon as the door opens you make a dash for it, scanning your bus pass and looking for a seat within the crowded aisles. there just so happened to be 2 free open seats near the back so you scurry to sit down as haechan follows, taking the seat next to yours.

just as you were about to put in your airpods and shut out the world, haechan turns over to ask something. “so.. why’d you want me to come to your dorm instead of mine?” his face gets unreasonably close to you, completely invading your personal space. “it’s just.. more quiet i guess.” you awkwardly reply, slowly backing away from his overbearing presence. you must admit though, whatever cologne he was wearing smelled really good. “why’re you assuming that my place would be loud? do me and my friends really seem like that much of obnoxious assholes?” he cocks his eyebrow, confused by your lack of enthusiasm. it’s not unusual for haechan to be uninterested in someone but it’s pretty rare for him to find the opposite. the more you push him away the more he wants to know about you, your cold personality fueled a burning desire inside that he hasn’t felt in ages. it’s like having a one-sided crush, he enjoys the chase of going after what’s unattainable, he loves a challenge.

˖⁺‧₊˚ᰔᩚ˚₊‧⁺˖

“have you always been this quiet your whole life?” haechan proceeds to bother you yet again while you’re writing notes for the project down. you thought flat out ignoring him would work in your favor, he’s already asked about five questions already and you’ve yet to answer any of them — he doesn’t give up as easy as you thought however. “no seriously, did i do something? is there a reason why you act so cold towards me?” there he fucking goes again. if he actually paid attention he’d notice that you don’t exclusively treat him any differently than everyone else, you didn’t want a partner for this project and rather work on it alone from the start. he’s so full of himself that he can’t even fathom the idea of someone not wanting to shower every ounce of their undying love and attention for him. “god… do you ever shut up?” you lowly mutter under your breath, getting up from your table to go grab something. thankfully you don’t think he heard you, all you got in return was a simple “huh?” still not acknowledging his other questions, you come back with a pumpkin spice candle, setting it on your window sill to light it. you may or may not have a slight obsession with candles, you’ve hoarded so many to the point you lost count but since it’s fall why not bring out your favorite scent of the season. plus it’ll ventilate the room so you don’t have to be reminded of haechan’s strong cologne, which you actually liked but refuse to give his already inflated ego such a compliment.

after an hour or so of drafting outlines for the project you take a break to get some water, coming back to your motionless partner with a bored look on his face. he made a few contributions but you mostly did the work, which you don’t mind doing anyway since you’re confident in your academic abilities. you’ve been sensing haechan’s eyes on you all night, as you took a sip from the glass you feel the most intense awkwardness, you’re hoping he asks something dumb at this point. “are you a virgin?” he blurts out on a whim. you almost spit out your water, there’s no way in hell he just asked you that. “wait— w-what?” all of a sudden you’re a flustered mess and can’t talk properly, why would he want to know something so personal like that anyway? “ah, so you do talk!” haechan belts out a chuckle, gloating in his small victory, “i just wanted a reaction out of ya and finally got it!” you wanted to wipe that smirk clean off his face, maybe you were right to call him a pretentious asshole the first day you met. “y’know i can report you to the board for asking your lab partner weird sexual questions, right?” you try your best to sound intimidating but it doesn’t seem to faze him one bit, instead he continues leaning in closer. “stop pretending like you don’t secretly like it,” your skin collects goosebumps when his palm lands on your thigh, “‘cause for someone who supposedly doesn’t like me is acting awfully comfy with me right now.” his grin widens as he looks down, you couldn’t believe your eyes when you realize both your legs were intertwined together under the table.

you shriek in a panic, scooting your chair away to the far end of the table, “in your fucking dreams. i actually don’t, perv.” scoffing at his boldness, this is definitely a guy who thinks he can have his way with anyone he wants. even if you did find him attractive that still doesn’t mean you inherently want to sleep him. his face is really pretty though, like way above average, you 100% get why he’s so popular and some part of you wants to find out what all the hype’s about. a little test drive wouldn’t hurt anything, right? “awe, you sound so cute when you swear,” he teases, yet again moving close to you with no regards of personal space, “would sound better if you were moaning it as i fill you up with my cock.” his eyes stare at your lips intensely, wanting more than anything to violently make out with you. that last sentence shouldn’t have made you as wet as it did, but you couldn’t help yourself anymore, you were done trying to fight it. as your lips crash into his, a surge of heat rushes through your body, tilting your head slightly sideways to gain more access. his soft lips felt buttery smooth against yours, melting instantly as he brings his hands to wrap around your waist firmly.

as you run your fingers along the entirety of his length, slowly rubbing his shaft through his jeans. you hear how pretty he sounds when he moans, loving every bit of it in your ear. you keep stroking and feeling haechan’s cock, choosing when to go slow or fast. it made you undoubtedly wet knowing someone like you could turn him on, feeling how stiff his cock got soon as you touched him, pulsating in the palm of your hand. his face scrunches as if he just sucked on a lemon, erratically rutting his hips up as his breathing gets heavier. “ah- shiiit..” he was so far gone, gritting his teeth from the intense pleasure when he suddenly jerks up from out of your grasp. “dammit, dammit, dammit” he whispers under his breath, you strike a confused look when he flinches from you trying to touch him again. it doesn’t make sense how eager he was just a minute ago but is now doing a literal 180. “i already came..” the guilt and embarrassment was apparent in his voice. how could a girl like you even make a guy cum just from simply touching them? he’s definitely had much more experience than you ever will. “i’m not a virgin, are you?” you decide to finally entertain his question, you’ve got nothing left to lose anymore. he definitely wasn’t expecting that answer at all, he was really hoping he could be your first. “yeah, me neither, but you sure do make me feel like one again ..” this is probably the first time something like this has ever even happened to him.

for the past 15 minutes you’ve been grinding up and down against haechan to get his dick hard again, which didn’t take long to do at all. closing your eyes in pleasure as his teeth grazed your skin, biting gently on the sweet spot of your neck. “nnghh~” you mewl, feeling so needy and helpless at the moment, all you could do was continue sensually rolling, massaging, and rubbing your aching core onto his clothed crotch. you really did want more but you couldn’t give it all up too easily, this is all he’s getting from you until you officially say so. “fuck.. feels ssoo gooood..” haechan groans, hips bucking at any slightest movement you make, he needs to fuck your tight cunt so bad. “y-yeah, feels good? wan’ m-more?” you brace your shaky hands on both his shoulders for leverage, feeling the tent in his pants stiffen as you rock your hips in sync with his. the fact you two were acting like some animals in heat, going at it and humping each other fully clothed was surreal to you. it had to be that intoxicating cologne he wore that reeled you in. as you were whimpering and crying out to him, haechan keeps expressing how much he needs you, how badly he wants to be inside. “need this throbbing little cunt to swallow my cock like right now.. i wanna be buried so deep inside.. need to feel your walls clench as you twitch and cum around my shaft, pretty please…” he grunts, already completely whipped and ready to risk it all for you. it didn’t take much for him to cum the second time either, granted he lasted longer than the first time but still wasn’t his best. the way you roll your hips and moan out his name was enough to get the blood rushing through his veins, pushed to his breaking point once again.

you came with him the second time, tangling your fingers in his messy brown hair. a string of curses leave your mouth as you chase your high, still slowly grinding on top of him as you rest your head on his shoulder. “now i understand why you’re so quiet..” he murmurs, veiny hands still finding purchase around your delicate waist. you of course wondered why, which he simply responded with “‘cause your actions do all the talking for you instead.”

#kinktober 2023 #haechan smut #haechan drabbles #haechan x f reader #haechan x reader #lee donghyuck x reader #lee donghyuck smut #nct smut #nct x reader #nct x female reader #haechan imagines

[yumeka-sxf]

Japanese Linguistic Observations in Spy x Family - part 1

This is a post series I've been planning for a while and I've finally had the time to complete part 1! 😃 I may have mentioned here before that I got my B.A. in Japanese/East Asian Studies, and even though I'm not fluent, I know the linguistics of the language fairly well. So I thought it would be fun to examine the interesting aspects of the Japanese version of the SxF manga that aren't reflected in the English translation. It might also be an informative experience for those who don't know any Japanese to learn a bit about the language through SxF! I'll try not to get too technical with the linguistics and keep my explanations at a beginner's level.

-----

Part 1 - Twilight's "honne and tatemae"

One of the main themes in SxF is how many of the characters have secrets they want to hide, so they act a certain way in front of others in order to mask their true selves. Japanese has a word for this phenomena called 本音と建前 ("honne and tatemae").

I remember learning about the concept of "honne and tatemae" during my Japanese college studies – a quick google search will yield a lot of publications on the topic and its relation to Japanese culture in particular. While the idea of hiding one's true intentions behind a fake facade can exist anywhere and is not something unique to Japan, it is enough of an occurrence in Japanese culture that there are specific words for it. The Wiki article has a basic but good definition of honne and tatemae, to quote:

A person's honne may be contrary to what is expected by society or what is required according to one's position and circumstances, and they are often kept hidden, except with one's closest friends. Tatemae is what is expected by society and required according to one's position and circumstances, and these may or may not match one's honne. In many cases, tatemae leads to outright telling of lies in order to avoid exposing the true inward feelings.

Sounds very much like the characters in SxF, doesn't it? Twilight especially, because unlike other characters like Yor and Anya, who simply have secrets they need to keep but don't create fake personas for themselves, Twilight does – the cheerful, friendly Loid Forger is a different person from the cold, calculating Twilight after all. Also unlike Yor and Anya, who speak the same way consistently no matter who they're talking to, Twilight uses different speech levels depending on which persona he's using and who he's talking to.

There are many different levels of speech in Japanese, ranging from super formal to totally crude. These speech levels are distinguished mostly by the pronouns the speaker chooses to use for themselves and who they're speaking to, as well as how they choose to conjugate the words they use. For example, 座ってください (suwatte kudasai), 座って (suwatte,) and 座れ (suware) all mean "sit," as in, telling someone to sit down. But the tone being conveyed is different: the first one is polite, the second one is casual, and the last one could be seen as rude if you're not using it with a close friend/family member.

As Twilight, he uses casual speech with the masculine and less polite pronoun 俺 or オレ (ore). This is the speech he uses when talking to a fellow spy like Fiona, and for his own inner thoughts.

As Loid Forger, he uses the polite 敬語 (keigo) speech, which is basically comprised of using the -ます (-masu) conjugation for verbs and the "to be" verb です (desu). He also uses the pronoun ボク or 僕 (boku), which is the standard male pronoun and more polite than "ore." He uses keigo to address pretty much everyone who doesn't know his true identity. When talking to a higher-up like Sylvia, he'll still use "ore" but will use polite speech instead of casual speech.

Anya is an exception to this: with her, he uses his most casual speech, the same as he uses with Franky.

I discussed a bit about this in part 24 of my Twiyor analysis posts, but this could be because Anya is a little kid, so he doesn't feel the need to put on any airs with her (same with Bond, whom he also uses casual speech with).

An interesting side note is that, as a child, Twilight used the pronoun "boku" but then changed to "ore" as soon as he became an adult/soldier.

Another aspect of keigo, besides using the more polite forms of pronouns and verb conjugations, is putting the honorific さん (san) after people's names. Twilight does this all the time with Yor, as she does with him. However, he switches to casual speech and drops the "san" part in her name when addressing her in front of people who (supposedly) believe they're a real married couple, such as Yuri and Fiona – because it would be weird for a real couple who have been married for a year to address each other in such a formal way, especially the husband. In the below panel when Fiona visits them, he's calling her "Yor" instead of "Yor-san" and using casual speech instead of keigo.

Oddly in these situations, while he uses just "Yor" when addressing her directly, he still calls her "Yor-san" when talking about her. During Yuri's first visit for example, he calls her "Yor-san" when telling Yuri how much Anya loves her (talking to someone about her) but then calls her just "Yor" a few moments later when telling her that he'll clean up the spill (talking to her directly). It's strange to me that he wouldn't just consistently use "Yor" whether he's talking to her or about her in these situations...I'm honestly not sure if he does this intentionally or if he just slips up since he's so used to using "Yor-san" in her presence.

*UPDATE* Thank you to @dentedintheworld-blog for enlightening me with the below reply about this!

"In Japanese, when speaking to your spouse's family about your spouse, you address her/him by attaching "san" her/his name out of respect for her/his family. This is also to show her/his family that you respect your spouse. That's why Loid calls Yor with san when he talks about how much he loves Yor to Yuri."

That definitely makes sense for why Twilight switches between "Yor" and "Yor-san" in these situations.

Regardless, this is why the scene in chapter 86 is so significant – when Yor isn't present, there's no reason for him to refer to her as "Yor-san," especially in front of a fellow spy like Fiona who knows he (supposedly) shouldn't have any feelings for her. Yet, even after he just called Yuri by his full name "Yuri Briar" a moment before, he doesn't do the same for Yor and continues to call her "Yor-san" here, much to Fiona's dismay.

In the same chapter, it's also significant that he uses "ore" when addressing Yor directly in his thoughts. Even though he's not speaking out loud, I believe this is the first time he's speaking directly "to" her as Twilight and/or his true self and not as Loid Forger.

But despite all this, I think that both Loid Forger and Twilight are tatemae…they're both masks to hide the person he truly is. The person who fondly talked about his mother to Yor on the park bench, the person who genuinely expressed gratitude for her sacrifice when leaving the resort island, the person who refused to kill Yuri in a life-or-death struggle because he knew it would hurt her…that's his actual honne. But of course, the ongoing conflict of the series is that he has yet to realize this. He won't even show his honne to his closest friend, Franky. Seems like it mostly comes out in dribs and drabs during his interactions with Yor...no surprise there, lol. The man is certainly a work in progress. When he finally starts letting his "honne" show, I'm curious what form of speech he'll adopt.

-----

Continue to Part 2 ->

#spy x family #sxf #spy family #spyxfamily #loid forger #twiyor #sxf spoilers #sxf manga #sxf manga spoilers #sxf analysis

[i-drop-level-one-loot]

Yandere!Monster X Barbarian!Reader

❤️ Barbarian Reader who seems to have put all their stat points into Strength/Dex, and completely forgot Intelligence

💀 thembo.exe

❤️ A huge sweetheart, and I mean huge

💀 Was always the tallest in their village, towering over both women and men alike

❤️ Due to their height (Reader) had a lot more placed on their shoulders from a very early age

💀 Some internal reflection could have led to a deeper understanding of their secret yearning to rely on another person, but that sounds like a lot of work... And thinking...

❤️ Happy to be sent as part of their tribe's representation when meeting with a tribe of monsters despite knowing nothing about politics

💀 While the presence of the monster people caused visible discomfort in their fellow warriors, (Reader) was too busy being star struck to think about how easily this new species could kill them

Xyleth emerges from his tent, unimpressed with the shivering smooth skins before him. His form was only vaguely human in the front, with a gun metal blue chest and face, sparkling in the sun like his skin was dusted in finely crushed gems. However, his backside and limbs were armored in an inky black shell, spiked for protection along his joints and down his long tail, with bone colored claws adorning his claw like appendages. His eyes seemed black in the shade, but held a universe of stars in the light. Xyleth was born to be a leader, only the strongest of his species developed this coloring, separating him from the rest of his tribe whose shells were a sandy brown to hide in the desert of their home.

❤️ (Reader) didn't notice the congregation were speaking, still taking in the sights about them, before they finally looked forward, witnessing the tallest of the monsters

💀 (gasps) "Damn, you're huge!"

❤️ The barbarians gasp in horror, and flinch away from (Reader)

💀 Was this some sort of joke?

❤️ A tight smile formed on Xyleth's chiseled face. "Yes?"

💀 "Yeah, I thought I was big, but damn, you could crush me without breaking a sweat, huh big guy?"

❤️ What's this? Was this human attempting to flatter him? A war lord of a different species?

💀 No, (Reader) was genuinely impressed.

❤️ "And the point of you bringing this up, small one?" He asked, his on edge grin softening into an amused smile. Although he would have no interest in something not his own species, it was adorable how this human flirted with him so confidently (that's not what's happening)

💀 "Ah, no point. I'd love to wrestle you though!" (Reader) knocked their fists together, pumped at the idea of testing their strength against the beast

❤️ Xyleth and his guards were taken aback, Xyleth's tail smacking the ground with surprise. No one had ever been so brave, so brazen. Unknown to the barbarians, the armored monsters had a very unique mating ritual, similar to scorpions dancing while pressing up against each other to test the male's strength

💀 Despite (Reader) being taller than their fellow barbarians, they were still several feet shorter than Xyleth's shortest villager

❤️ But your personality... None of the women or men had ever approached Xyleth like (Reader) had (again, not what's going on..)

💀 Perhaps Xyleth would actually listen to the barbarians, instead of slaughtering them for having the audacity to request a conference with him like he originally planned

❤️ The barbarians were invited to stay with the rival tribe for a week as they discussed various topics (Reader) had no interest in

💀 (Reader) quickly became loved by the local children, the children adoring (Reader) as a human loves their pet puppy, allowing (Reader) to rough house with them and feeding them snacks like a stray

❤️ (Reader) did not find this insulting, and was enjoying the affection and attention they were receiving

Xyleth was bored in his meetings with the soft skins, upset that (Reader) wasn't involved. He had learned that (Reader) was brought in as the muscle, which irked him. Did they not research how giant his species were before arriving? What did they think someone as small and sweet and adora- Xyleth thumped his tail loudly, frightening the barbarians. Why couldn't he get (Reader) out of his head? "Let's continue this after lunch."

💀 Xyleth roamed his streets in search for (Reader). Although they weren't there as part of the 'debate team' it was a little upsetting that (Reader) wasn't at least waiting for Xyleth near the meeting tent seeing how enamored they were with him

❤️ (Reader) was found in a circle of chuckling adults, struggling with all their might to lift two children at the same time

💀 The sight immediately filled Xyleth's heart with warmth, seeing the children as their own for a split second, and picturing an entire future with the barbarian

❤️ He knew (Reader) would have no objections to becoming his mate, however their people might argue

💀 It didn't matter if he had to kill the other barbarians staying in his town, he had initially planned on slaughtering them anyhow, but it would be better if they enthusiastically supported their love

❤️ And they did support his proposal, especially since it was either trade (Reader) for their protection (from Xyleth's own tribe) on their hunting paths, or die right there and have their entire tribe extinguished

💀 What a supportive family (Reader) has~!

(Reader) didn't notice when the rest of their people left the village, still having the time of their life with creatures that more matched their strength and height. One of the kids gasped and wiggled his way out of (Reader's) arms, running away as his parents also turned back towards their homes. A large shadow approached the confused human, who got up, patting the dirt off their legs.

"Play fighting with young boys? Are you trying to make me jealous, little one?" Xyleth joked with a smile.

(Reader) felt their heart soar being called "Little One", relishing in the friendliness they experienced from the citizens the barbarians called monsters.

"Bwahahaha!!! Jealous? If I was as imposing as you, the only one who could make me jealous would be a god!"

Xyleth couldn't control his tail, whacking the ground in embarrassment over his love's honesty flirtatiousness.

"If it wouldn't be too inconveniencing, I would be honored to take you up on that wrestling proposition now.." He could hardly speak with how excited he was, fearful the adorable little human could hear his two hearts rapid beating.

"Really? Right now? I'm a little worn out, but I'll never turn down a challenge! Just don't be too disappointed!"

Xyleth picked (Reader) up in his arms, fighting every urge to take them right then and there in the center of his village.

"I could never be disappointed in you~" his deep voice vibrated against (Reader's) body, as he carried them to his tent, the poor human completely unaware of what he was about to do to them.

#yandere x reader #yandere x darling #yandere monster #gender neutral reader #not proofread #thembo #soft yandere #yandere #yandere oc #bad writing