#but they dont live at home w their parents

[royaltrios]

i drew childes entire immediate family/designed the ones that didnt have canon designs. for no real reason other than im writing about them in a fic and i got attached

#for the record i think he has 2 older brothers 1 older sister. he the 3rd son so #but they dont live at home w their parents #and hes much less close to them #chiscara #my art #this is completely. self indulgent i rly like putting them in russian clothes #tonia and anthon being twins is not a very original theory ik but i like it. it makes sense. their names match. #i think their dad is a fisherman and not often home. and him and childe have a weird relationship since the whole. well. hole. #thats the warmest snezhnayan clothes ch could get scara into btw. i think he has a sensory thing w heavy clothes #they force him to put a coat on when he goes out so he doesnt like. scare ppl #most of all childes mother. #theyre lucky the pants remind him of hakama and hes not wearing shorts #chsc #chscnhtrv #childe

[skunkes]

^_^

#sorry doomer posting #but like idk! #i keep talking abt how if i werent trans id be more inclined to accept my fate of living w my parents/family forever #but also with upcoming election and living in Texas maybe i just wont ever get to transition anyway and that will solve everything wont it #i want to leave so badly but i think id just be swapping my current misery for another set #like id be alone but at what cost. and id be alone. no friends no partner to live with no people in my empty home #work and sleep and struggling to eat. idk #im simply not meant to be alive honestly #talkys #delete later #in general i keep wanting things but not wnough bc ive been taught to not want things #i don't want to leave enough to put in the work to do it #i dont want to transition enough to get past the fear of change #i dont want anything. i dont want anything. i am a good dog

[hauntedselves]

one of the feelings i hate most is feeling anxious with no clear reason. like, if there is a reason to feel anxious, ok, i can deal with that. but just anxiety for anxiety's sake? ugh, what am i supposed to do with that?

another feeling i hate is the autism "something in my routine is changing and i don't know how to deal with it". the only cure for that is time to get used to the new routine, which sucks when you're feeling the anxious-stressed-Off-SomethingIsWrong mix of Fucking With Autism Routine. i don't want to wait for me to get used to it, i'm feeling Bad and i want to fix it now!

#this post brought to you by: i'm finally moving out of home and i'm excited but also Scared #escpecially since just last night i had another Episode of not-hypoglycemia-but-not-Not-hypoglycemia #and im like... i dont want to deal with that w/o my parent near. i mean i'll be living w/ my sisterr and her partner and their friend so - #- im not gonna be living alone but its still. Scary #personal #dogpost #hs' autism #hs' anxiety #ive also been having a lot of trauma nightmares lately so thats not helping

[guideaus]

my great aunt from germany is supposed to get here and im kinda dreading it

#personal #not to be negative but i feel like ive got seasonal depression stacked on regular depression #plus i kinda dont like her and do have the 'i dont want people in my house' mentality lmao ESPECIALLY when im not in a good mood #i live here w my parents and now i have to put on another fucking act?? in my OWN home??? #be proper or whatever?? AUGHGHGH

[pcktknife]

thinkin abt family hcs for the splatoon idols

#i think shivers an only child probably grew up raised by they grandpa or older uncle #since we dont know lore for them considering the octarian army stuff like marina i cant speak on it fully but probably a splatsville native #fryes got a big supportive family second oldest w a few lil siblings they all lived in the same home in a smaller city in the splatlands #...til she moved to splatsville #big man has a wife and kids i know he does i feel it in my soul #he also has a big extended family outside splatsville. during holidays frye and shiver prolly visit they know his fam personally #marina doesnt actively keep in touch w her parents but they call her its nothin bad she prolly just is nervous abt the whole quittin.. #the army thing she stays in contact w her sisters though #pearl prolly doesnt keep in touch w her parents much either distant relationship maybe #its fun thinkin abt characters unconfirmed family members and relationships ^^ #kae.txt

[pepprs]

i will shut up abt this i promise but like. the concept of being in a stable safe mutually loving whatever relationship is INSANE . like how can you ever feel bad about yourself or wounded or whatever again. it’s like a superpower or somethi ng. <- doesn’t know what she’s taking abt bc she’s never experienced it or the absence of it after having it merely the negative space of it and is filling in the gaps w logic or something. but it’s INSANE to me. like of course i feel like shit about myself i am catcrumb unloved.jpg!

#purrs #imbeing insane about it i know it’s not that simple / reductive and i will still feel like shit abt myself once im in a relationshp (if i #get to be ♥️) and there are lots of other legitimate reasons to feel shit agtbyiurself. but it’s like no ficking wonder i feel inadequate i #am a 24 year old who lives at home and has never held a hand or whatever next to two 50sometjinf year old married men with pets and phds. of #course i am going to feel inadequate and stupid and lonely. like i canttttt 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 and th w worst part is you can’t just go out into #the world saying that and looking for that it has to find you so i will not join any dating apps or whatever but i don’t fucking go anywhere #so im not going to meet anyone and i knowi am so young and stupid and just having a horrible day that is reminding me of horrors. but the #way i am mentally shoving my whole fist in my mouth. OF COURSE I FEEL LIKE SHIT I DONT HAVE A LIFE PARTNER!!!!!!!!!!!! I DONT HAVE THAT #SAFETY AND STABILITY AND TRUST AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!!!!!!!! AND I NEVER HAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #delete later #like this is what makes me crazy abt parents and kids too and whyi don’t think ihave kids. bc i think (and i know this is wrong / unhealthy) #it is a primal human need to be mutually someone else’s number 1 person and when you have kids it’s like you’re gonna love your partner more #than the kids and then the kids (read: me) watch that and get fucked up over it. but also that could just be me reacting to the UNSPEAKABLE #psychological damage of being a twin. which again is ridiculous bc it’s n out like abuse i just had to share something with someone else si #since before i was born and ofc there was more like actually kind of abusive stuff on top of it LOL but that aside. idk what im saying i #just feel so crazy. the amount of composure it takes me every day to not start SCREAMING with frustration and envy when i see ppl being #RIGHTFULLY DESERVEDLY visibly confident and loved. like ok valentines grinch go sit in the drainage pond forever please. but it’s so crazy #like how are you supposed to go through the world unaware of how much love you’re missing out on because you’re young and then you realize I #it and then somehow you miss the train and you are scared you are going to d*e alone ♥️ im normal

[acent-four]

Cant believe they labelled four as ‘Pushover’ 💀

On the other hand this basically makes the bg i came up w for my 4 oc canon 👀

#PUSHOVER makes no sense they were previously labelled ‘down for whatever’ and joined team chaos- they just do want they want and #are basically the living version of chaotic neutral #then again they deleted pearlina canon in thhe translation so u cant expect them to get anything right smh 😒 #but my fours bg is basically that theyre sorta a prodigy and their parents are super strict and dont let them do much outside of studying #so they join loads of clubs as an excuse to not be home most the time (tho they have to be like ‘educational’ clubs 😒) #and they move out as soon as possible when they turn 14 w no notice to try get big in sports #but then marie kidnaps them lmao #splatoon #splatoon relationship chart #splatoon 3 #image #text #agent four #agent 4 #🦊.text #agent four splatoon #agent 4 splatoon

[girlwithfish]

idk i hate thinking abt childhood and then also like 18-20 and then also 20-22 . so all of my life :)

#it wasnt all bad Im being dramatic b ut like #ofc my brain is gna focus on the bad! #like moving back home has been fine and i know i could b in a much worse situation and its fine but #it also has been difficult mentally emotionally a bit. sometimes i wonder what itd be like if i didnt feel like this #And had a healthy close relationship w my parents.... lol. dont think that exists idk ....... #Idk its hard to explain. like my relationship w them isnt Bad but its not close or like great but not bad. its fine. I guess #but just sm unspoken complicated stuff i have to internalize and keep to myself #and i wonder if its kinda sad i feel i have to just not live w them to feel better abt it instead of just repairing it but #no idea where to start. its complicated #Idk #i guess im under the assumption that i have to feel like this 4ever #And i feel weird abt visiting my cousin and the family members on my moms side and then my cousins in laws all these ppl i dont know #then 18-20 i was miserable then 20-22 was well yeah

[blue-madd]

Passed the whole day designing a coffee shop yesterday bc I have a new paracosm in mind and I realized I could just design the whole place to daydream of it better instead of looking for inspo

#it has two other floors since the barista lives upstairs but i dont wanna post them #its a silent coffee shop in a rainy town so theres no music playing but ppl can connect their headphones to the barista's playlist #if they want music + they can share their own songs so its a really friendly shop #and theres even a pillow fort in the shop!! and its all sensory friendly i love it!! #the story is about a new guy in town finding this coffee shop and becoming friends w the barista #they found a litter of stray cats & took them to the barista's home so now they're both parents #also the new guy is a vet assistant & he loves cats but barista dont know shit abt cats so he keeps asking newbie to come by to not fuck up #and yes they are in love #madd #paras rant #paraportal #paracosm : mixed AUs

[collecting--stardust]

Guess who's spending Eid away from home again next year lol

#me bitch #i havent went home for eid for 2 years and if you count next year then make it 3 #so fyi first day of eid is estimated to be on the 10 of april 2024 which is Wednesday #so my classmates estimate that the classes on monday and tuesday will be online so they started to buy the tickets on Friday (5/4) #or during the weekend basically because yknow festive season = expensive tickets #and i told it to my friend and she chekced the ticket to go to kl and its only 200+ (official app) or 100+ (travel company) on 6/4 at 5am #so she asked me if i want to buy it so we can share transport to airport together and be in the same flight #so i called mom just now but since i need to take the transit to ny hometown it racks up to rm800+ 💀 #totalled with the flights back to uni on sunday (14/4) it will be up to rm1600+ 💀 #mom sound sorry and even said she can pay if i really want to go back home #but yknow i dont want to burden my parents more (they are the one who usually pay for my flights anyway) #and my friend who lives in the same state as me also doesnt seem to be able to afford the expensive tickets too #so its just me and her in the perantauan again ig lol #but my friend who lives here said to just celebrate eid with her and we can sleep in her room 😂 #tbh i dont really mind not going back because as i get older the excitement for eid lessen idk #but i kinda miss the bersalam on the morning of eid with my family so yeah #and if i were to graduate and start working which i cant imagine ngl then i wont be home much anyway #whatever at least i get to fast at home for a week so theres still some W to celebrate #personal.txt

[awek-s-archived]

this trend of my mom thinking im an idiot who doesnt know anything abt the world is genuinely getting really tiring

#like my irritation levels are Not going down it's piling up more and more and she'soff work til the end of the month so she's gonna be w me #24/7 and idk how to handle it really lmao #i lived on my own for years im only back home bc the cost of living is so fucking high and all my friends pulled out of our prior living #arrangements . and that sucks but it's literally not my fault or up to me.. like i dont want to be here ? #and shes kinda holding on to me so badly because she doesnt wanna be alone and she has such an awful track record w men but that means that #she takes everything out on me all the time but also babies me intensely. #im 25 she literally tells me what an egg feels like as if ive never used one or even touched one before like it's that bad #but she's also intensely emotionally immature so on top of that i also feel like a parent #bc most of my time is spent on trying to educate her abt xyz and her getting defensive and im like i have to tell u this bc if you go out #saying the things you're saying to me now you're gonna get beaten up in the street lmfaojdsklgfd #like... #anyway sorry but like. it's REALLY getting to me. i really want to leave. im so so fucking broke #when i get my student loan for my phd im still not going to be able to afford to move out #i dont know what to do anymore #not to be sewer side all on main but like.. #aweks.txt

[oatbugs]

i am actually terrified xoxo

#ok yk how i ended up going to sweden to a family friends house and staying in an empty w a futon in it #the family friend in question is actually a really ridiculously clever translator/linguist/author/journalist/etc #genuinely shes so smart . but also shes like . super introverted and the whole house is constantly silent i can hear someone sighing #through a closed door . and the door to my containment cube TM is in the living room and i am constanrly living in fewr #of making any noise . also forgot to take UK-EU adapter w me so i literally cpuld not study which is the entire reason #i came here . to run away from my parents constantly screaming at each other etc. anyway theyre actually lovely ppl but i am so afraid of #like . using up their food etc . that i rejected it for a while . which is dumb as fuck bc straight up rejecting to eat smns cooking #is actually rly rude in my culture . but i still feel guilty. and like im not even here w my own money (i dont have any of that left xoxo) #anyway we had a convo abt languages and i realised my persian is so shit rn its so . shameful of me. she also told me to learn german #(bc philisophy) and i told her i kind of am kind of and she said do u find it a mathematical langauge ? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN #WHAT DO U MEAN . LIKE IK ROUGHLY WHAT SHE MEANT BUT LIKE WHAT WAS THE RIGHT ANSWER #when i responded she just smiled and said nothing for 10 seconds i feel like my whole personality was being judged for that response #anyway @swedes ur consensus culture is actually so fascinating #empty cube** first tag #every moment i am living in fear . still 100x better than being home lmao #the way i didnt sleep for 3 days . xoxo #anyway linköping bitches r like lets do smth crazy and go to a pub at 7pm order 2 entire beers chat cordially and split the bill before 8pm #heart emoji everyone here js rly sweet

[perenlop]

god i want a cat

#parents were talking abt me maybe getting a college room cat and letting it live at home when i get back 🥺 #and ough got to play w my aunts cats and my friends have cats that are so cute i want one soooooooo bad #genuinely they seem right up my ally bc i worry im not active enough to properly take care of a dog #but cats are chill while still being playful its just on their own terms #im ofc gonna try and look some stuff up and take classes if thats a thing bc ive only ever had spike and i wanna do it right #i dont wanna seem like im getting caught up in how cute they are and ive got dog owner habits #echoed voice

[kaoharu]

hmhmm actually ykw rant in tags kinda

#✧ chatting ! #so basically our discussion topic today was like. why do ppl in poverty often turn to doing the ''wrong'' things like selling drugs etc #instead of just working a minimum wage job at loke. mcdonalds #and holyy fuck this girl. the whole time she just kept saying oh theyre just ruining their lives and theyre stupid for selling drugs !!! #if they get a job at mcd then thwy can have lots of benefits + good adults around them theyre dumb to not take thay offer up #and we were like ?????? its not that easy ???????????? do uu rlly think that a single parent home w kids can support themselves off mcd wage #or like an older sib supporting their younger sib ?????? #also sometimes in like. inner city places uu cant just Walk everywhere cause it can be super dangerous . . . #to which shes like ok then just drive a car ???? #and were like . . . a car is a luxury . . . theyre literally living in poverty . . . #and then shes like ok then just walk its all a matter of willpower and not being lazy !!!!!! #at which point im just. huhhh ?????? #and she just keeps trying to push this idea that people who live like that are useless and just lazy and atp im ready to jump out the window #and she kept saying stuff like if theyre working so hard then just move out of the poor neighborhoods etc. and its like #??? its not that easy to just up and move away ???????? #also housing is expensive . . . ? utilities ????? transportation to this new housing ?????? #dhe thinks thay everythikg in the world is so easy its so frustrating . . . #i dont fault her tho its just how she grew up but like still yk !!!!! geh #anyways this is kinda mean but what are the chances she has a tumblr acc #send post or wtvr

[bfwonho]

You own a car??

yeah. see im in a really interesting situation where my parents are upper-middle class but refuse to spend money on their kids as much as possible. no tuition, nothing, once youre out of the house youre on your own. thats why i was eventually kicked out, i had no job or plans to go to school and so i overstayed my welcome and had to scramble to get a job and ive been living paycheck to paycheck ever since

however, when me and my siblings turned 18 we all did get a cheap piece of shit car, i cant afford to fix the loud ass squeak in mine or take it to the car wash but its a huge privilege i even have one to begin with i fully understand that. i live in a little quaint town with shit public transport so id be fucked if i didnt have one tbh i wouldnt be able to work (before i had my license NO ONE would hire me either even when i told them how id get there alternatively. you need a license and car to even survive here which is just great isnt it)

#me trying to justify my owning a car so the ppl without one dont decide im not disabled or poor enough to help #yes i actually went to private school and have parents who have rly nice homes and bought the consoles i own when i lived w em #cus id never be able to afford shit on my own i literally earn less than 300 dollars a week and would be homeless if i didnt beg for money #on here cus as much as i cry to my parents abt being disabled and needing help they dgaf #my parents actually love to threaten me with homelessness due to my disability ^_^ so thats fun! #also my siblings had to get a job at 14 to afford anything i just couldnt cus of the tism so that fucked me over more #but like thats what i mean my parents have money but thats for them only :P

[minglana]

my dad completely seriously proposed me going to back to the US when i finish uni...... oh my god😭

#like. ok yall. i. i dont know how to express it #but the US (esp. tx) is where i spent half of my teenage yrs and although its TEXAS i hold it so close to my heart #that i like. wouldnt mind going back #its one of the 3 or 4 places where it feels like home to me and i would love to experience it again #and like the most probable thing if i did end up going again is that i would go alone #and for me to be able to live alone so far away from my parents #while also in a place that felt like home. i think it would be such an amazing opportunity😭🥺 #but then. i think of how we had to get by without decent food and all the things we had to do to be able to eat normal food #and i see red bc like. i dont wanna experience that ever again😭😭😭 #but god i rly would love going back to tx #bc again. between zgz/uesca. my village. and the town in tx i grew up. all of those feel like home to me #zgz less so but thats beside the point #anyways i also know that if i went back it wouldnt feel like home anymore bc i have this idea that doesnt actually match up w reality #but idk bro😭 i just got so excited😭😭😭 #z xarre