#but the pacing was just a massive fucking challenge for that whole season

[lostjonscave]

hmm. i’ve been away for a while, and. this blog is now 2 years old. and my thoughts on tma, among other things, have changed significantly over the past 2 years. i don’t mean they’ve gone from positive to negative, they’ve mostly gone from one prevailing idea to another, but i don’t necessarily agree with a lot of the meta that i wrote 2 years ago now based on various developments throughout the course of the show. since those posts do still get attention every once in a while, i feel like that’s important to say, at least for me?

however jon archivist is autistic and i was right from day one about that part. fuck yeah neurodivergence baby

#tma #also jon and tim should have kissed at least once #and melanie should have fucking LIKED HIM #what kind of character development is it for her to go thru psychological recovery and not accept that she only ever hated jon because #they were so painfully similar and becoming comfortable with herself means becoming comfortable with seeing herself reflected in him #also basira needed more um. just more? #i actually think every character needed a little more screen time to wrap up all the genuinely compelling shit that was introduced thru them #yes even jon #but those are kind of my hot button issues i think #actually ngl i know everyone loves martin and i also appreciate him but i feel like i got to know him VERY intimately as a character #sometimes to the detriment of other characters who might have used the screen time in s5 specifically #but the pacing was just a massive fucking challenge for that whole season #i understand why they made the choices they did for how to structure the narrative but i. how to say. don’t agree with them particularly lol #anyway cheers #oh jon and gerry should have kissed too. #idk how— time travel whatever it just should have happened. #SMOOCH. THAT. GOTH.

[takerfoxx]

Magia Record, Season 3, Episode 1, "We Failed," First Impressions!

Well, this came the fuck out of nowhere!

Seriously, was there even an announcement that this was dropping? Because it took me completely by surprise.

Well, anyway, Magia Record has had quite a…challenging development cycle thus far. I mean, going in they were faced with somehow adapting the plot of a gacha game into a coherent screen narrative, one that was supposed to somehow stand on its own despite the shadow of the original series still looming large and the fanbase still wondering when they’re getting their damned Rebellion Story sequel.

The first season more-or-less succeeded. Sure, there was the expected pacing hiccups that comes from trying to adapt a game story, but overall they turned in a solid effort, weaving a fairly compelling narrative with interesting and likeable characters, made fairly decent use of the OG cast when they decided to pop in, and leaned in HARD into the surrealism that has become associated with the franchise, which I dig.

Second season was…Okay, we all know of the nightmare that was the production. The pandemic was going down, everything was thrown off, anime production is horrible even under normal conditions, and SHAFT is pretty notorious at this point for their turbulent problems behind the scenes. And as some other comparable shows that started off promising but ended up dropping the ball at the end due to massive production problems proved (Wonder Egg Priority, COUGH!), they really need to overhaul how they’re treating their poor creative and animation staffs. So as a result, while the episodes were good in concept, the animation was blatantly unfinished in places, some parts didn’t have dialogue recorded, and the subtitles were just plain not there half the time in one episode. I mean, there was still obviously a lot of effort, and I still enjoyed them, but man were the seams easy to see. Plus, it was weirdly much shorter than season one for some reason?

Now we got season three, which is…only four episodes? And they all get dropped at once? Huh?

Okay, I don’t have any proof of this, but what I think happened is that these four episodes were actually supposed to be part of season two, but they realized that there was no way they could get them out in time, so they decided to chop the finale off into its own thing, take the time to finish them properly, and drop them all at the same time to conclude the project. Again, I’m only theorizing here, but I wouldn’t be surprised if that is what happened.

But hey, here it is, the continuation of the story. So how does our first episode of the story’s climax pan out?

…dear God.

This is the mysteries revealed episode, the whole-episode flashback that walks us through the story’s main mystery and fully explains what’s going on and why. So, basically the equivalent of the tenth episode of the original series. Only maybe not quite as emotionally harrowing, but then, what is?

Well, there’s episode nine, I guess, which actually fucked me up the most. Still not over it, actually.

Anyway! Our biggest mystery is the case of Iroha’s missing sister Ui, whom nobody seems to remember, including herself! She’s met Ui’s supposed friends Touka and Neru, whom are heading up the Wings of Magius, a pseudo-fascist Magical Girl cult looking to save Magical Girls from their grisly fates, and who could blame them?

Shame about all the Magical Girl supremacy and sacrificing innocent civilians to do it.

But okay, all we knew before is that Ui, Touka, and Nemu were kids at the hospital together, and Iroha befriended them all while visiting her sister. And then she lost all memories of her sister even existing, to the point where I was starting to question if Ui had ever existed at all, or if there were false memories at play intended to manipulate her for some reason.

The truth is far more simple, and yet far more devastating.

As we find out, Iroha had it right. Ui did, in fact, exist. She was sick, she made friends with Touka and Nemu who shared a hospital room with her, and Iroha also became close with them while visiting her sister. Perfectly normal.

Unfortunately, Ui’s illness took a turn for the worse, and Kyubey being the manipulative fuck that he is, took that opportunity to recruit her into his grindhouse machine, turning her into a Magical Girl.

Again, perfectly normal, at least within the rules of that world. He’s done it a ton of times.

However, her new duties are weighing on her, and the three kids have noticed that something was wrong. So when she has to run off one day to stop a witch, they decide to follow her, and witness her in full uniform fighting a terrible monster, along with some kind of catbunny trying to make a contract with minors.

And hey, credit for staging the fight in a morgue. Creepy AF, I love it.

Again, so far, nothing out of the ordinary for this world. It’s what Kyubey does all the time: recruit a girl, and use her to go after other girls in her life.

But much like the Kyubey from the OG show didn’t see Homura’s timeloops changing Madoka’s destiny coming, this Kyubey wasn’t prepared to reckon with these girls. And here’s what I love. These kids are smart! They of course wanted to help Iroha, but they immediately smelled that something was off, so they made a point to sit down and interrogate Kyubey all day long, asking him question after question. And despite him claiming that he doesn’t lie, you can see how he deliberately hides the truth, never giving the full answer to their questions.

However, they know this, and they correctly intuit what witches are and where they come from, and wish to spare Iroha and all other Magical Girls of that fate. So after putting together a full story, they come up with an absolutely brilliant plan.

Kyubey holds all the cards in his abusive system, huh? Well, what happens if they wish for his power?

They straight up usurp his abilities in such a way to offset the harm that he’s causing, with one of them gaining the ability to absorb all the negative energy clouding soul gems, one being about to transform it into cleansing energy, and one being able to redistribute it back into soul gems. They single-handedly stopped the Magical Girl system in its tracks! Kudos, girls. That was smart.

Except for one itsy-bitsy problem: they vastly underestimated just how much negative energy Ui would be taking in all at once, and it swiftly overwhelms her, starting the process to turn her into a massive witch. And in desperation, all Touka and Nemu can do is sever her soul gem from her body before it’s lost.

But it’s now unstable and falling apart. It needs a new vessel where it’ll be safe until a solution is found.

Well, there’s the dry husk of the Kyubey they had basically overthrown.

So, that’s what the mini-Kyubey is. It’s Ui herself. It’s her soul gem, her very essence, combined with a Kyubey corpse. Dear God in Heaven.

But in doing so, they also severed Ui from reality, totally wiping her from everyone’s minds, including themselves, save for Nemu who was the one who did the deed. And in erasing Ui, Touka loses sight in why they’re working to accomplish what they are, and instead is just left with the mission. And the body of the witch Ui was going to become, which turns out to be the larval form of the goddamned Embryo Eve.

Furthermore, our old friend Alina Grey, who had been poking around the hospital for some reason while the girls were brainstorming, overheard the part about what witches truly are and confronted Kyubey about it. So she wants in as well, because she doesn’t want to become a witch. But now both she and Touka have kind of gone off the deep end, and only Nemu actually remembers their original purpose and that Ui existed at all.

I honestly love this explanation. Yeah, some parts are kinda bullshit, but let's face it: the whole Incubator system is bullshit, and nobody cares. And honestly, this makes a lot of sense given what's gone on so far, and it really makes me excited to see how it all pans out.

Please don’t screw this up…

#puella magi madoka magica #pmmm #magia record #ui tamaki #touka satomi #nemu hiiragi #iroha tamaki #alina grey #kyubey #wings of magius #embryo eve #reaction

[jonsa101]

Yes, There’s Only 14 Episodes in Season 3 But Sharpwin is On Track and Progressing How They’re Supposed To.

There has been so much talk about this season’s writing and the lack of Sharpwin scenes that I thought I would just address everything in this post.

First, the writing this season is NOT BAD! In my honest opinion I actually think this season has some of the best writing in the series. Compared to season two, the writing is head and shoulders above what we got last year. More than ever before we are diving into these characters stories, seeing friendships form, getting a better look into their home life and seeing secondary characters shine! This is a good thing! These were the things that were so desperately needed in season 2 but we didn’t see this play out. I’ve said this before in my infamous season 2 rant and I’ll say it again, a show can’t solely depend on a ship! It has to have great storytelling and good character development for all of it’s main characters. This is what New Amsterdam failed to do in season two and they’re now making it up for it in season 3. The only area I would say the storyline suffered was the Cassian, Helen and Max “love triangle.” There was definitely more intent with that plot before the pandemic. Cassian was not only supposed to be a catalyst for Jealous Max and Sharpwin but he was also supposed to come in and challenge the way Max did things. Cassian’s whole thing was self care first=great patient care which was the complete opposite of Max and the two of them were supposed to clash. Obviously this completely changed due to the pandemic. You can’t have a storyline about a doctor prioritizing himself first for “better patient care”in the midst of thousands of doctors globally throwing themselves on the frontlines and even loosing their lives to COVID-19. It would have been a terrible look to have that storyline so they clearly scrapped it! What we saw was probably them trying to salvage whatever was left from the original plot while they still had Daniel Dae Kim in the limited amount of episodes for season 3.

Apart from that, I think the writers are doing a fantastic job in terms of character development this season. Arguably I would say that Iggy probably has the best storyline so far and that’s incredible for his character. Tyler Labine is acting his ass off and Iggy’s scenes with Lauren, Vijay and Martin were top tier!!! We are finally getting a Max and Reynolds bromance that was teased in season one but literally know where to be found in season two! It’s great seeing them bond on screen and I hope we get more moments with these two. We’re also seeing Reynold’s “life plan” blow up in his face and we finally have some closure with Bloom. They kept us in limbo for so long! We didn’t know if him and Bloom were truly over but now we finally know. Also, it seems like he and Evie are officially done as well and he might have a new love interest on the horizon. For Lauren, she’s clearly seems to be having a coming out story which is something I didn’t see coming at all. I’m really curious how they’re going to play this out for her and can’t wait to see it unfold. Last but not least, for Max and Helen they are both going through massive character development phases which leads me to my second point.

I love a good Max and Helen scene as much as the next person. To me they’re the ultimate ship and I want to see them thrive and flourish but just because we don’t see Max and Helen interact doesn’t mean that the show isn’t properly developing or investing in their relationship!!!!!!!!The relationship between Max and Helen is so nuanced that their relationship doesn’t hang in the balance because they don’t have more witty, flirtatious, or emotional dialogue. Don’t get me wrong, I adore those moments. Those scenes between them make us the passionate sharwpin shippers we are. At the same time though, we have to truly take a look at why the state of their relationship is where its at now and why from a narrative perspective their current interactions make sense. In order to do this, we have to take a look at where Max and Helen left off last year.

At the end of season 2, Max made a move on Helen and almost kissed her in her office. After this moment occurred he never addressed it and at the time he was still dating Alice. There’s no doubt in my mind that this was the catalyst for why Helen started dating Cassian in the first place. She had practically laid her feelings out there and told Max he was the reason she gave up half of her department. After this revelation and the massive, intimate moment he initiated in her office, he didn’t even have the decency to address it. He swept it under the rug and wanted to keep the same relationship that he had with her like nothing ever happened. Even though Helen was aware about Alice, we now know from season 3 that Helen felt a type away that Max never “officially” told Helen that he was dating her. This is IMPORTANT!!! Max and Helen did not end on a high note in season 2. In fact, the very last scenes we see of season 2 is Helen blowing off Max to go on a date with Cassian and Max breaking off things with Alice. I know this wasn’t intentional due to the season being cut short but it definitely contributes to where they are now. 

Fast forward a year later, and not only do we still have a massive almost kissed elephant in the room between Max and Helen but also the trauma of being on the frontlines of a pandemic and going through the biggest social justice movement the world has seen. This is something I’ve said many times over but I’m not sure the fandom recognizes how much these events have permanently altered these characters and changed the dynamics of this show. COVID-19 changed everything. The Black Live Matter Movement for the first time grabbed the attention of the world and changed everything too! Max and Helen are in the process of trying to heal and rebuild their lives the best they can as individuals after such a tumultuous year. At the same time, they are acutely aware of the feelings they have for each other and the UST between them and are carrying the weight of that as well. Naturally guys, the combination of all this is going to change most dynamics in a relationship. Things are awkward and distant  because Max and Helen are awkward and distant!! They have a lot of shit that they’re going through as individuals and subconsciously as a “couple.” They are clearly not in a healthy place to be as vulnerable as they once were to each other. And how can they be when their feelings have literally been eating at them for over year?! It’s hard to ignore that and try to force yourself to go back to the way things were. Especially when their feelings have “technically”  been out in the open since the end of season 2. They both know what it is! They were steps away from unleashing years of built up sexual tension between them and they went on with their lives like it never even happened. Max walking in on her and Cassian kissing in HER OFFICE and subsequently having that convo with Helen was not for shits and giggles. It triggered the BEAST of his feelings that he had fought so hard to suppress. There is no doubt in my mind that when he saw them in her office kissing, he was having some serious dejavu to their almost kissing affair last year. He‘s in love with her and she’s in love with him but this what happens when you continuously try and run away from those feelings and let it fester instead of trying to deal with it head on. The dynamic  were seeing between them now is a result of their unresolved issues and it absolutely plays into Sharpwin’s story. It doesn’t take away from it. It makes sense for where they are NOW! 

If we look at season three holistically, you’ll realize that a momentum for something significant happening for Sharpwin has been set through the acting and writing. I got to give it to Ryan Eggold. He has that fire and desire, Mr. Darcy type level acting down to a tee so far. It is so satisfying seeing Max so overcome with his feelings that you can tangibly see it in his body language and hear it in his voice. We have seen Max taken aback by Helen before but we have NEVER seen him like this. I keep on saying it but this is different guys. Something has shifted and it seems like Max is on the verge of exploding. His feeling are burning hot right underneath the surface and it’s a beautiful thing to behold. Last night’s episode was ripe with this type of content and Ryan was in his acting bag! It wasn’t an overtly “Sharpwin” episode but the writing and the acting is so clever and methodical, it will have you thinking otherwise. At the beginning of season 3 Max told Helen that he wants to build something better for Luna and something better for her. Was last night not a beautiful reflection of that? One question asking Max if he has ever loved a black woman put him in the shoes of his patient’s husband and had Max advocating for his wife like he would advocate for Helen if it was her! If that’s not fucking romantic I don’t know what it is and if the alarm bells aren’t going off that there is something deeper at play here with a huge payoff around the corner I don’t know what to tell you! Another moment that sticks out to me like a sore thumb is when Helen was telling Cassian that her brother died. I wrote about this in a previous meta of mind but Helen at her most vulnerable telling Cassian that she feels like she’s running out of time is SO SIGNIFICANT guys!!! It’s not only tell us that she fears that she’s missing out on the windows of opportunities for the wants and needs in her life but it literally sets the pacing of how quickly Sharpwin is going to progress. It is the beautiful freudian slip that tells us exactly where things are headed for these two. To me this is equivalent to Max telling Helen “I love my doctor” and “what if I want you?” in season 1. This episode had no interaction between Max and Helen but it was a MASSIVE Sharpwin indicator through and through! These are just a couple of examples but even their respective journeys in parenting is so Sharpwin driven. So in all I’m not mad in the direction the show has taken to showcase their relationship this season because Sharpwin is deeply interwoven in the storyline this year even if it’s not overtly obvious through emotional dialogue/ interactions. 

Also, one thing you have to realize is this, season three is wrapping up a lot of loose ends from season 2 and when it comes to Max and Helen these two points will be/ have to be addressed in the next six episodes.

The Almost Kiss

Whether or Not They Want To Be Together

The showrunners know without a shadow of doubt that the resolution for these two points is owed! If Sharpwin is talking about their almost kiss, there is no way that they aren’t talking about what they mean to each other and what their future looks like together. Both solutions literally go hand in hand and I promise you they are not delaying the resolution for that till season 4. It’s not happening fam. We will see this play out within the next six episodes. So in hindsight, more Sharpwin interaction are on the horizon. 

When I was making predictions about this season I wasn’t aware that this season would only be 14 episodes. I’m sad that season 3 is so short but that still doesn’t change my mind for where I think the story is going. Call me crazy but I’m sticking to my guns. There is something about how Ryan is portraying Max that is signaling something huge. Also I just trust the context clues that i believe the show is giving. I trust it! Anyway y’all! If you have any sharpwin question just DM here or message me on Twitter! my username is @oyindaodewale. 

Love you guys! ❤️

#sharpwin #new amsterdam #max goodwin #helen sharpe #max x helen #sharpwin meta #new amsterdam meta

[survivor-ingary]

Rites of Passage

Keith: Wish we had more time to talk to each other, with time difference and going to the first tribal council of the season. That chance never came. Hope someday we play again.

Babs: It's giving Boy Mulan rn. Wish I could've at least said hi to you lmao

Dennis: We never met

Babs: Your vibes are lovely. I wish you could've stuck around longer :( 💔

Dennis: We never met

Keith: I’m you are a nice person but since you were so inactive, it was hard to get a conversation in the game with you. Hopefully you play again when u have the time.

Babs: Hi! We didn't get to talk at all lmao hope we get to next time!

Dennis: Hope everything is okay with you

Keith: I don’t know why we just didn’t click and spoke much. Even at our first tribal together we never got much of a conversation going. Sorry

Babs: 'm sorry, dude, I had 0 recollection that you were here when I missed my first tribal. Welp. What are ya gonna do?

Dennis: We never met

Keith:  it was very sad to see you go especially for the reason you were being targeted for. The timing was unfortunate.  Where three people came over after mutiny that were safe and people were very worried about you aligning with former Kyoshi cast members at merge. You never got the opportunity only to prove otherwise. I had hoped we could have worked longer in the game being OG Pendragon. Hopefully on another season. :)

Babs: Of all the votes I casted, I regret yours the most. I wish I could've kept you in, but it was the majority regardless of my choice. I hope we can talk after and reconnect. I love your vibe.

Dennis: Sorry Moth :( I hate that you were voted out but it’s not because of you, it’s the people that you would’ve worked with.

Babs: We didn't get to connect very much, but "m'theydy" will never not get me.

Dennis: You are a saturnian legend and you were robbed.

Keith:  I wish you stayed longer with us and didn’t leave.  In the time you were with us, I saw a friendly, happy and great person.  Also a massive team player, who would be willing to color their hair for a challenge.

Babs: ROBBED. That's it, that's the whole rite. You deserved so much better, truly.

Dennis: Queen you were sooooo robbed. I wanted to work with you in this game and I am sorry that Anastasia and Brayden lied that hard to you to paint you a false scenario. You deserved so much better and I hope that one day we can see each other in another org :)

Keith: Just like you, your blindside was an iconic moment of this season. As much as I thought it was too soon for you to go but you putting a bigger target on yourself so that you don’t blindside people who you were loyal to, was going to make the situation hard. But There is no question about your loyalty hence I understand why you did what you did. But I wish we would rather choose a side then keep everyone happy and I wouldn’t have mind going with anyone at that point.  I appreciate you for making the time and effort to connect with me at my pace. I hope you understand that It wasn’t a move against you but became a move for self preservation. Hope we can have a tea spilling party after this season.

Babs: Miss Shady Boots, I see you, ma'am. Wish I could've seen more of your mess this season. Hope to see you at Mary's one day :')

Dennis: King. I did you soooooooooooooooo dirty. I hope we can still play roblox after dis game. Once I heard from Ellie that you suspected me of wanting to work with Raffy it became very clear to me you were not going to trust me down the line. You were a threat who had to go, and I’m not sorry I voted you out but I am sorry about the way that I went about it.

Keith: This was a tough vote. I knew we didn’t have much of a game connection. I knew since I wouldn’t have the option to work long-term with you this season. I didn’t want to string you along on anything or give you any false hope unnecessarily because that would just be cruel.  I honestly found you to be an amazing, down to earth and genuine person. Really wished we came together on an earlier tribe. Someone like you with such an amazing energy would be a great ally and friend. Whether, the game would go our way or not. It would still be a blast playing with you.  Also, I know u don’t need it but the offer still stands. U ever feel anxiety and need a diversion. Call me anytime and anywhere, I will help anyway I can.

Babs: CEO of plants. Your vibes are immaculate. Please let's be friends after this.

Dennis: I wish you and I had developed a game relationship. We had a very strong personal relationship like I feel like we’d be friends in real life ya know? But in this game, you were working with people that ultimately did not work with me and I felt like your loyalty would ultimately never come to me. Sorry that it had to be that way youre still cool.

Keith: Never expected to see you go the way you did. You’re an awesome and sweet person. Excited to see you succeed on twitch and ready to support an amazing person like you in anything you decide to do. Drop that link.

Babs: Dennis constantly sings your praises, and any friend of his is a friend of mine. Drop that stream link asap.

Dennis: You forever changed my life when you told me I’m actually not a red head but a brunette. That’s wild. It was awesome to play with you and I’m sorry that you were voted out the way you were. It was very refreshing to play with someone who wasn’t coming from a survivor-strategy background. Stay awesome :)

Keith: I know based of the previous seasons. Your amazing to watch play the game. From your social ability to your executions of big moves, the fact that you never back down or give up, it is amazing. But all those attributes make it hell to play with you. I knew that you wanted to take me to the end because you could beat me. So day one I knew I would cut you sometime, but unlike last time. I needed to make sure that this time when I took a shot, under no circumstances I could miss.  But getting rid of you was a decision that took into account only from events this season, I saw you subtly trying to push the narrative that I was not doing much in the game during tribal, to ensure I would have no chance to win. So I knew taking you out sooner would be better, which would deny you any chances of flipping things over.  I thank you for supporting me through the initial start of the game and that immunity challenge (which I originally thought of sabotaging. So good call on doing it yourself). You’re a great competitor.

Babs: https://youtu.be/trRgAQ7L8mE

No, but really, your tone seems very pointed. I know that we're friends irl, but I'm not willing to get a strike for anyone unless they're dying. Also, my fellow finalists are fucking sick. I want us all to win. To hell w being a mess for once.

Keith: Firstly I just would ask for your forgiveness. I sat on that call, the night u left. N It was so fucking so hard, to see someone care about the game so much and stressing themselves for it, who would do anything to keep themselves in the game. I loved that passion. N I’m sorry in that moment I had no choice but to lie to you. You were a strong player. I don’t know if it’s the red hair, but you look like an evil genius, whom I hope, I get to play with someday.

Babs: She's giving Captain Brayden Morgan rn, we love to see it. It was fun to have a not-so-cutthroat round w you for once! Cheers!

Dennis: Literally we will never be compatible to work together in a game. Two completely different types of logic. And I am at peace with that.

Keith: I am really sorry about your vote out. It was the one time that I didn’t know a flip was happening, I appreciate you still putting your faith in me during the game at that point, Wish I could have done better.

Babs: Miss Beverly Hills, I will admit, some premerge tea w spilled w me that didn't sit right w my spirit. I don't want it to be something that spreads and comes off as something that precedes your reputation in the community. Some pearls of wisdom from a messy bitch, themself.

Dennis: I really enjoyed our lil talks and happy to help you figure out your rising sign. I wish that fire you had at the beginning of the game stayed lit.

Keith: I really hope you don’t hate me. I genuinely believed you played a great game and you would win if you got to the end. I worked my way in with Dennis, so that he would have more loyalty to me. I can say that after kindergarten, in comparison to my age. You’re the only little girl I am afraid off. Also I stan you for supporting Riley in the instant tribal that way you did and for your Kind heart. Queen Move.

Babs: Miss Country Costco, our vibes aligned from the moment we started to talk! You were a target from the jump, and rightfully so. You're a tough cookie, who still manages to smile and get a laugh out of the rest of us. Never change, except for the boiled peanut thing. Ew, you weirdo. LMAO ❤

Dennis: You’re an icon and my favorite person to have met. It has been fun to enable each other’s chaos and play this game messy. Super fun to strategize with you and our long talks were also a blast. Sorry that it ended the way that it did, but we will be friends after dis I know it :)

Keith: My fellow timezone challenged brother. Words are not enough to describe what an amazing human being you are. I am so grateful to have met you and can’t wait for the game to end so I get to talk to you. My connection with you may have taken more time to develop than with Dennis, But it was a true connection throughout. And no matter what people say, you played an amazing game and I really thought you could win in the end. Officially a lifetime member of the Kenneth Fan Club.Miss Country Costco, our vibes aligned from the moment we started to talk! You were a target from the jump, and rightfully so. You're a tough cookie, who still manages to smile and get a laugh out of the rest of us. Never change, except for the boiled peanut thing. Ew, you weirdo. LMAO ❤

Babs: My dear cousin in colonization, there should've been a final 4, and that's the truth. But, as most things go, that's just not the fantasy that played out irl. Your vibes are fantastic, and I love a gay who laughs at every thing I do. It boosts my ego. Really, it does. Keep in touch!

Dennis: I truly felt like sometimes we were the same person. I’ve appreciated and admired your ability to strategize and critically think. You’re one hell of a game player and I wish you had won an immunity or two because I know how bad you wanted it. I know you’re gonna shine in every org that you play because you are a king. You are a kitty cat. You are zaddy.

#rites of passage

[thelastchair]

Powder Magazine

(Written by Sam Cox - December 28, 2020)

Growing up in Montana, my winter free time was consumed by skiing. Big Sky was the destination when I was barely old enough to walk. Eventually we made the move to Bozeman and Bridger Bowl became my second home. During the early years, my family made the trek to a handful of Warren Miller movies when they were on tour in the fall and Snow Country was the magazine subscription that landed on the coffee table. I was vaguely aware of Jackson Hole, Snowbird and Squaw Valley and my father would occasionally regale me with tales of skiing (read Après) in Germany when he was in the Army. At some level, I already understood that there was something special about Bridger, but realistically, my sphere of outside influence was quite small. Christmas of 1989 turned my entire world upside down. My aunt and uncle are longtime Salt Lake City residents and Brighton skiers. Typically they would send a package each year with the customary cookies, toffee and a card. However, this year they sent two VHS tapes and a magazine - Ski Time, Blizzard of Aahhh’s and a copy of Powder. Things would never be the same for me. Scot Schmidt became my hero, Greg Stump was taking skiing into uncharted territory and above it all, Powder created an eloquent voice for our sport and was the fabric that held things together. Even at my young age, everything that I’d intuitively sensed before was distilled into a potent desire to devote myself to the simple pursuit of being a skier.

Johan Jonsson, Engelberg, Switzerland - Photo: Mattias Fredriksson/POWDER

Powder was founded in Sun Valley by the Moe brothers in 1972 as an annual portfolio of The Other Ski Experience. After several years of running the magazine, Jake and David Moe sold Powder to the owner of Surfer Magazine. A repurposed aircraft hangar in San Juan Capistrano became the new home of skiing’s most prestigious publication. Over time, there was an ebb and flow to the size of staff and cast of characters, each person leaving their unique mark. For decades Powder weathered corporate acquisitions, office relocations and the constant metamorphosis of the ski industry - never losing its voice, Powder remained the benchmark. It was a source of creativity, inspiration and a defacto annal of history. For many it was also a shining beacon, a glimpse into a world filled with deep turns and iconic destinations - even if this world could only be inhabited inside the constructs of your imagination.

My story and the impact Powder had on the direction I would take is hardly unique. The magazine left an indelible impression on countless skiers. When the news broke this fall that operations were being suspended indefinitely, a heartbroken community took to social media to pay homage to the magazine and how it changed their lives and in some cases, careers. This is my version of a tribute and it’s definitely not perfect. In order to gain some perspective, I reached out to former staff members - a collective I admire and respect. It’s an attempt to articulate the essence of Powder, capture its influence on the skiing landscape and give credit to the people who made it come to life. 

Bernie Rosow, Mammoth Mountain, CA - Photo: Christian Pondella/POWDER

HANS LUDWIG - The Jaded Local

“Skiing has always been really tribal and one of the last vestiges of having an oral history. Powder was a unique concept, because they weren’t really concerned with the family market. They were just concerned about being really into skiing. Growing up in Colorado and skiing moguls, my coaches Robert and Roger were featured in the early Greg Stump films. Being in their orbit, I knew a little bit about skiing culture and what was going on out there, but didn’t have the whole picture. The Stump films resonated with me, but Ski/Skiing Magazines didn’t really do it for me. Powder was the door that opened things culturally, it was the only entry point before Blizzard of Aahhh’s.”

“Something that nobody gives Powder credit for, is sponsoring the Greg Stump, TGR and MSP movies and giving them full support right from their inception. It legitimized those companies and helped them become one of the catalysts for change and evolution in skiing. Ultimately this change would have happened, but at a much slower pace without the support of Powder. Getting support from Powder meant they’d weeded out the posers and kooks and what they were backing wasn’t something or someone that was “aspiring” they were a cut above.”

“Powder brought a lot of things into the mainstream, raised awareness and helped to legitimize them: Jean-Marc Boivin, Patrick Vallencant, Pierre Tardivel, telemarking, monoskiing, snowboarding, the JHAF, Chamonix, La Grave, Mikaela Shiffrin, fat skis pre McConkey, skiing in South America….the list goes on.”

“I had some rowdy trips with Powder. Writing “Lost In America,” I went Utah-Montana-Fernie-Banff-Revelstoke via pickup truck, only backcountry skiing and camping in the mud. It was a month plus. I did another month plus in Nevada, which was after back to back Jackson and Silverton. Total time was two plus months. That was fucked up, I was super loose after that whole thing. So many sketchy days with total strangers”

“People forget that Powder was around long before the advent of the fucking pro skier. Starting in 1996, the magazine was in the impact zone of the ski industrial complex. There is limited space for content each season. It was a challenge to balance the pressure coming from the athletes and brands to cover something that was going to make them money vs. staying true to the Moe brothers original intent and profiling an eccentric skier, a unique location or even fucking ski racing.”

Full Circle - Photo: MJ Carroll

KEITH CARLSEN - Editor

“When I was young, Ski/Skiing didn’t do anything for my spirit, but Powder lit me up. It ignited a passion in diehard skiers and gave them a voice and community. It was focused on the counter culture - the type of people who rearrange their lives to ski. This was in direct opposition to other magazines that were targeting rich people, trying to explain technique, sell condos or highlight the amenities at a ski area.”

“Skiing has always been my outlet and mechanism to get away from things in life. My two talents are writing and photography, so I enrolled at Western State with the direct goal of landing an internship at Powder. Even at 19, I had complete focus on the direction I wanted to take. If it didn’t work out, my backup plan was to be a ski bum. 48 hours after graduating, I was headed to southern California to live in my van and start my position at Powder. When the decision was made to close the magazine, it was really personal for me. Powder had provided me direction in life for the last 30 years and I needed some time to process it. In a way, it was almost like going to a funeral for a good friend - even though it’s gone, the magazine lives on in all of us and can never be taken away.”

“It was, and will always remain, one of my life’s greatest honors to serve as the editor-in-chief for Powder Magazine. It was literally a dream that came true. I’m so grateful for everyone who came before me and everyone who served after me. That opportunity opened literally hundreds of doors for me and continues to do so today. I owe the magazine a massive debt of gratitude. Every single editor was a warrior and fought for the title with their lives. They were doing double duty - not only from competition with other publications, but the internal struggle of budget cuts, staff reductions and trying to do more with less. Powder never belonged in the hands of a corporation. The magazine spoke to an impassioned community and never made sense to an accountant or on a ledger.”

Trevor Petersen, Mt. Serratus, BC - Photo: Scott Markewitz/POWDER

SIERRA SHAFER - Editor In Chief

“Powder celebrated everything that is good and pure in skiing. It highlighted the old school, the new and the irreverent. The magazine also called bullshit when they saw it. It was a checkpoint, a cultural barometer and an honest reflection on where skiing has been and where it’s going.”

“My involvement with Powder came completely out of left field. I was never an intern or established in the ski industry. My background was strictly in journalism, I was a skier living in Southern California and editing a newspaper. I knew that I wanted to get the fuck out of LA and Powder was that opportunity. It was a huge shift going from my job and life being completely separate to work becoming my life. Literally overnight, Powder became everything - friends, connections and part of my identity. It derailed my trajectory in the best possible way.”

Brad Holmes, Donner Pass, CA - Photo: Dave Norehad/POWDER

MATT HANSEN - Executive Editor

“Keith Carlsen was a man of ideas, he had tremendous vision and influence. He came up with the ideas for Powder Week and the Powder Awards in 2001. In some respects those two events saved the magazine.”

“Powder was the soul of skiing and kept the vibe, it changed people’s lives and inspired them to move to a ski town. As a writer I always wanted to think it was the stories that did that, but in truth it was the photography. Images of skiing truly became an art form, 100% thanks to Powder Magazine and Dave Reddick. Dave cultivated and mentored photographers, he was always searching for the unpredictable image from around the world and pressed the photographers to look at things from a different angle.”

“It sounds cliche, but writing a feature about Chamonix was the highlight for me. Sitting on the plane, things were absolutely unreal. I linked up with Nate Wallace and the whole experience from start to finish was out of my comfort zone. Ducking ropes to ski overhead pow on the Pas De Chèvre, walking out of the ice tunnel on a deserted Aiguille du Midi right as the clouds parted, late nights in town that were too fuzzy to recall. The energy of the place taught me a lot. I didn’t have a smartphone and there was no Instagram - I had time to write, observe, take notes and be present with who I was and with the experience. As a writer it didn’t get any better.”

“The true gift of working for Powder, was the once in a lifetime adventures that I wish I could have shared with my family, I was so lucky to have had those opportunities. It almost brought tears to me eyes.”

Peter Romaine, Jackson Hole, WY - Photo: Wade McKoy/POWDER

DAVE REDDICK - Director of Photography

“Just ski down there and take a photo of something, for cryin’ out loud!”  “I’ve found that channeling McConkey has been keeping it in perspective. Powder’s been shuttered. That sucks. What doesn’t suck is the good times and the people that have shared the ride thus far and I’m just thankful to be one of them. There’s been some really kind sentiments from friends and colleagues, but this must be said - Every editor (especially the editors), every art director (I’ve driven them nuts), every publisher and sales associate, every photographer, writer, and intern, and all the others behind the scenes who’ve ever contributed their talents get equal share of acknowledgment for carrying the torch that is Powder Mag. There’s hundreds of us! No decision has ever been made in a vacuum. Always a collective. At our best, we’ve been a reflection of skiers everywhere and of one of the greatest experiences in the world. It’s that community, and that feeling, that is Powder. I’m not sure what’s next and I’m not afraid of change but”  “There’s something really cool about being scared. I don’t know what!”

Scot Schmidt, Alaska - Photo: Chris Noble/POWDER

DEREK TAYLOR - Editor 

“Powder was the first magazine dedicated to the experience and not trying to teach people how to ski. It was enthusiast media focused on the soul and culture. It’s also important to highlight the impact Powder had outside of skiing - today you have the Surfer’s Journal effect where every sport wants that type of publication. However, prior to their inception, everybody wanted a version of Powder.”

“Neil Stebbins and Steve Casimiro deserve a lot of credit for the magazine retaining its voice and staying true to the core group of skiers it represented.”

“Keith Carlsen is responsible for the idea behind Super Park. This was a time when skiing had just gone through a stale phase. There was a newfound energy in park skiing and younger generations, this event helped to rebrand Powder and solidify its goal of being all inclusive. Racing, powder, park, touring - it’s all just skiing.”

Joe Sagona, Mt. Baldy, CA - Photo: Dave Reddick/POWDER

JOHNNY STIFTER - Editor In Chief

“What did Powder mean to me... Well, everything. As a reader and staffer, it inspired me and made me laugh. I learned about local cultures that felt far away and learned about far away cultures that didn’t feel foreign, if that makes sense.”

“But I cherished those late nights the most, making magazines with the small staff. Despite the deadline stress, I always felt so grateful to be working for this sacred institution and writing and editing for true skiers. We all just had so much damn fun. And it didn’t hurt meeting such passionate locals at hallowed places, like Aspen and Austria, that I once dreamed of visiting and skiing. The Powder culture is so inclusive and so fun, I never felt more alive.”

Doug Coombs, All Hail The King - Photo: Ace Kvale/POWDER

HEATHER HANSMAN - Online Editor

“Powder is a lifestyle and an interconnected circle of people. It’s about getting a job offer at Alta, opening your home to random strangers, locking your keys in your car and getting rescued by a friend you made on a trip years ago. Through the selfish activity of skiing, you can create a community of people you cherish and can depend on through highs and lows.”

Ashley Otte, Mike Wiegele Heli, BC - Photo: Dave Reddick/POWDER

The contributions of so many talented individuals made the magazine possible. I would like to express my sincere gratitude to everyone who shared their experience at Powder with me. Also, I want to thank Porter Fox and David Page for crafting inspiring feature stories that I enjoyed immensely over the years.

After the reality set in that the final issue had arrived, a void was created for generations of skiers. I’ve been focused on being thankful for what we had, rather than sad it’s gone. It’s a challenging time for print media and I wholeheartedly advocate supporting the remaining titles in anyway you can. In a culture driven by a voracious appetite for mass media consumption and instant gratification - I cherish the ritual of waiting for a magazine to arrive, appreciating the effort that went into creating the content and being able to have that physical substance in my hand. Thanks for everything Powder, you are missed, but your spirit lives on.  

Captain Powder - Photo: Gary Bigham/POWDER

#skiing #powder #last chair #powder magazine #the other ski experience #the skiers magazine

[thegeminisage]

i’m gonna liveblog my rewatch of 2.08 because i can

it’s stupid long so here’s the cut

just to give you an idea of how fast this switch flipped for me at the start of this episode when uther is like “u will find no one who embodies nobleness better than my son arthur” i went “PFFFFFT” & had a good chortle

i have a lot to say about this duel challenge sequence. 1. why are strangers always coming in and tossing their glove on the floor. everyone in that room is armed. just take them out! 2. arthur picks up the glove first this time, unlike 1.03. guess he can learn after all 3. he does it BEFORE SEEING HER FACE god classic he’s so fucking stupid

everyone getting their panties in a twist over having to fight a WOMAN when in reality she goes on to kick his ass is like...both tiresome & hilarious

i used to really be on the fence about the Vibe between merlin & arthur because while they seemed quite happy to die for one another from the get-go most of the time arthur is just being MEAN and merlin isn’t as mean back and it’s like :/ ok i don’t get what everyone else is so heart-eyes over. but in 2.08 they do a lot of confiding in one another and just general talking about plot-stuff where arthur’s insults are...not absent, but kept to a minimum, and idk it’s nice! it’s nice. less like arthur is a massive bully and more like they’re Companions. i’m not hopeful about it lasting bc this show doesn’t know the meaning of the words “consist continuity” but it was reeeeeaally good here

arthur’s face when he lost to a G I R L and uther just walked out with no comment. even back when i still hated him i was like “ouch”

that being said it was a welcome change of pace to see merlin giving ARTHUR shit for once. finally

upon morgause and morgana’s first meeting when morgause says “i hope you will remember me fondly” i went “WOW THAT’S GAY” because i didn’t KNOW and cathy told me later she had to put her head in her hands for five whole minutes. don’t shoot me i’m just the messenger they’re the ones who wrote it that way

my favorite thing about morgause is that i couldn’t immediately figure her out. i’m in the habit of throwing out guesses about future plot points for fun, because i’m a writer and that’s how i deconstruct things, and since this show was kind of meant to be kid-friendly i’m usually right. but as far as morgause went...i didn’t have a clue. i had NO IDEA this whole ep would be like this

i’ve said this before (not on this blog tho) but arthur is like...really eager to die. i keep joking that he has a death wish but upon further reflection i don’t think he’s actively seeking to end his life as much as he would be relieved to die for something noble like honor or whatever because then he would have...done it right, if that makes any sense, and wouldn’t have to worry about screwing it up anymore. he doesn’t want to die but he craves a good death. to prove to his dad and himself that he’s made of the right stuff?? i’m not being very clear. this concept requires more thought

it’s REALLY a lot for me that uther would rather throw arthur in his own chambers than have him find out about ygraine. yyyyikes

merlin sneaking in that rope was so cute. he finally got the group’s communal braincell for a few minutes

on the other hand after the troll episodes i am SO tired of dung being played for laughs. i really suffered

also man i’m so glad morgana finally got some sleep it’s what she deserves

this Dead Parent talk really mcmurdered me. both merlin and arthur lost a parent when they were very young & they now cannot remember said parent and we HAVE THAT IN COMMON so every single word they said was like an arrow straight to my heart!!!!!!! like as good as the ending to this episode was (and OH it was good OHHHHH it was GOOD) i think this right here is what truly softened me up towards arthur. this is relatability, this is emotional vulnerability, this is a genuine human connection made between EQUALS and frankly it’s exactly what i’ve been wanting from these guys for a season and a half. their willingness to die for each other is good stuff to be sure but it’s EMPTY without some meat to back it up & we’re finally getting what we deserve

“i’d do anything for even the vaguest memory” like they didn’t have to go that hard & read me for filth like that but they did. they did. arthur. babe. my guy.

almost every time someone comes in to speak with uther he’s eating and he has like an entire mini-banquet in front of him even though he’s all by himself. like, an entire plate of grapes, a whole-ass chicken, an intact loaf of bread, a bowl FILLED with whole uncut apples...wtf??

“what would YOU know about magic, merlin?” “nothing ;)” i did have a good chortle truly

i’ve already made my points about arthur and a good death but MAN he was hasty to put his head on that chopping block for no good fucking reason at all. holy shit. him casually doing that swing-thing he does with his sword to the axe ahead of time really adds a lot to this entire thing and also aged me ten years

when arthur was like “what if my father’s attitude towards magic is wrong” and “surely not everyone who practices magic can be evil” i gasped so fucking loud. so fucking loud

and the worst part is you can practically feel merlin’s heartbeat pick up. just LOOK at his “wtf am i hearing is this for real could my dreams actually come true” face. but at the same time, he’s got to be the one with a healthy suspicion here because arthur is in over his head. so he STILL can’t trust it. and then naturally it goes to hell so quickly that the chance for merlin to confide in arthur is lost. i can’t believe this took 4 irl years and five seasons. watching this live must have been like TORTURE. i’m practically bingeing it and i’m still suffering deeply

it’s very odd to me that arthur specifically said his mother died before he opened his eyes but the first thing ygraine says to him is that she remembers him staring up at her. to me that’s an obvious clue that she’s a fake, and the cutaway during that line to merlin’s face tells me he had the same suspicion (and that he’s kind of horrified by it)

ARTHUR FEELS SO GUILTY FOR HER DYING AND I’M ALSO DYING AND SLDFKMGHLSKDFJH

i know for a fact that ygraine’s telling of these events is slightly altered from the truth too...there’s no way that uther would have been so overcome with grief that he went on to commit genocide if he knew beforehand that his wife would die and was willing to sacrifice her

on the other hand, there’s also a cutaway to morgause’s face during this speech in which she looks surprised or confused at what ygraine says, which doesn’t add up if she was pulling these strings, so...What Is The Truth

not to be like this but merlin bearing witness to this whole series of events is like...there’s some things that once you go through them with somebody things between you change and there’s a new intimacy there...i don’t expect much from a show that likes to return to the status quo but in my heart it’s how i feel

OH BOY HERE WE GO. arthur arrives in camelot and pulls his sword out as soon as he leaves his horse leaving a visibly spooked merlin behind him this is the STUFF

“arthur was born of magic” is really a hell of a line because even though i already knew this backstory i hadn’t stopped to consider it like that...no, magic is not a crucial part of arthur’s identity and how he views himself the way it is for merlin and morgana, but it’s still a part of his history and what made him who he is, that made him alive and different from other people. his hatred and fear of it becomes so much more tragic in that light. i think also there was such a clear line drown before between people who are magic and people who are not and for me, mentally, arthur kind of...swapped sides, or is at least straddling the border

merlin’s absolute FURY at uther’s hypocrisy is like...........fucking. another thing i wanted to see for a season and a half. imo there’s not nearly enough meat to the fact that merlin is magic and ultimately serves uther who is trying to decimate him and his kind - has actually SAVED UTHER'S LIFE on MULTIPLE occasions. this is the first time this show actually went “hey uther is responsible for the deaths of hundreds of people and that’s really not at all ok” and i am SO into it. like, no, he’s not misguided. he’s not “just grieving.” he’s a murderer. he’s responsible for genocide.

the final 9 minutes of this episode feature arthur pendragon being absolutely FURIOUS. he’s LIVID. he’s PISSED. and i love it more than anything else this show has done so far

i genuinely, truly believed he didn’t have this in him. never in my WILDEST DREAMS could i have imagined arthur doing this. i had written it off as the stuff of fanfics. but holy shit my man snapped

HE👏DID👏THAT👏

reasons i did not see this coming at all even a little: 1. i figured there was no way arthur would get over his anti-magic thing until near the end (i know it must come back later, but STILL) 2. i did not believe for one second he could ever seriously stand up to his father for more than a few minutes at a time 3. most of what’s making arthur so goddamn pissed is that he thinks his dad killed his mom on purpose but he’s also showing a fair amount of horror at the fact that uther hunted down and killed everyone even remotely associated with sorcery like animals. do you know what that is? does anybody else understand the enormity of this? HE IS SHOWING EMPATHY. i DID NOT believe he was capable of it.

i do feel a way about how uther started this scene from a place of cool confidence - he was handing out orders, “leave us and no one comes in,” manipulating the situation, “she was lying to you, magic users are trying to destroy us,” and finally trying to close the door on the topic and reassert control, “i am your kind and your father and you will SHOW ME SOME RESPECT” - and arthur was not only having none of it (the way his eyes narrowed as uther’s casual “she was lying”...oh boy) he TURNED THE TABLES and had uther ON THE DEFENSIVE. the number of times we’ve seen uther shut other people down and get his way because he’s king and everyone is afraid of him and this time uther was the one who afraid LITERALLY for his life. HOW’S THAT TASTE BITCH god it was SO satisfying. like, there’s one shot where arthur is walking slowly towards him after all his verbal tactics have failed to de-escalate the situation and he’s in the backround with his eyes so fucking wide and he looks TERRIFIED. i LOVE IT

“you are my son. you would not strike an unarmed man.” “i no longer consider myself your son” AND HE STRIKES HIM

HE👏

DID👏

THAT👏

when i say that i LITERALLY screamed i am not at all exaggerating or using hyperbole. cathy asked twice if i needed to pause & collect myself. i could not have paused if my life depended on it

i’m really on the fence about merlin stopping arthur. on the one hand, arthur has suffered enough and doesn’t need to suffer more by having to carry the guilt or dadmurder. under the other, uther is a monster and needs to die, and the entire world would be better off without him

like...arthur’s face when he says “you have caused so much suffering and pain”...he really finally got it. for one beautiful brilliant moment he understood

i am NOT on the fence about merlin lying to arthur. that was the wrong way to do it. arthur 6000% deserves to know the truth and that’s only gonna come back and bite them later i’m sure (unless it never comes back at all in which case i’ll be pissed)

i’m not sure that arthur would have backed off if they had told the truth and said “uther didn’t realize your mom was gonna die so really that part wasn’t his fault”...he was really mad! but he might’ve. lying was not the way to go. i’m so angry at literally everyone in that scene for allowing arthur to walk away believing he was wrong. he was so full of conviction and he was about to do a really good thing - not good for him personally, but good for the world - and everyone he trusts lied to his face in order to maintain the status quo and not have to deal with anything ugly. i HATE it. i’m team arthur now. i’m in the arthur defense squad. all those dumb liars aren’t good enough to be his friends!!!!!!

like, even his dad’s words were sooo carefully chosen to avoid lying but also avoid telling the whole truth. even in that moment when arthur was laying it all bare and they could have made some sort of progress as character and as people. we had to go BACK TO THE STATUS QUO

Once Again Arthurs Heart Is Hardened To Magic i hate it thanks

honestly look uther telling arthur that he’s a trusted ally in the fight against magic should make him feel a lot more distressed than what we got. i mean i’m sure he’s glad his cover is safe but he should realize that if uther approves he’s doing something wrong

furthermore, uther hasn’t changed a bit. he says he came to thank merlin and that merlin is a loyal servant and trusted ally, but then threatens his life before he leaves. honestly we should have just let arthur stab him

i do appreciate them making a point of mentioning that merlin was tempted to let uther die and that it would have been better for him if uther HAD died and he only did what he did to protect arthur but like...there were ways to do that that didn’t involve lying i think. this is an optimistic show most of the time. it wouldn’t have messed with my suspension of disbelief if arthur had dropped the sword knowing the real whole truth! but no, The Status Quo

i don’t know if i will still love arthur so much in the coming episodes.................we’ll see. i’m kind of nervous because i don’t know how they’re ever going to top this. i think we peaked right here and it’ll never be this good for me again

#personal #merlin blogging #this is.............literally so long sorry #no one is obligated to read it. #i doubt anyone would get to the end anyway #but i just needed to talk about all 1000000 of my feelings #tldr is im v proud of arthur and very mad at everyone else #which makes ME an annoying arthur stan now. oops! #liz's meta #liz's merlin stuff #not really but this post deserves a spot in the hall of fame #liz makes stuff

[asterekmess]

Personal Writing Promotion

So I’ve realized that I’m running this sterek blog, and I haven’t even posted anything that I’ve written. I would make them a recommended sterek fic of the week, but that seems a bit pompous...though...now that I think about it, this probably isn’t much better.

No matter! So I’m gonna just post a couple links for fics that I’ve got finished and posted on Ao3, since that’s my main fanfiction platform, and then when I eventually start posting new ones, I’ll keep you updated on new chapters coming out or whatever. Sound good?

~~~

Title: Needed Rating: Teen and Up WC: ~17k Tags: Canon-Typical Gore, Pre-Slash, Pack Feels, Pack Bonding, Pack Mother Stiles Stilinski, Spark Stiles Stilinski, Stiles-centric, Insecure Stiles Stilinski, Alpha Derek, Stiles Has Panic Attacks, Understanding Derek, Derek Has Nightmares, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Post-Season/Series 02 Finale, Pre-Season/Series 03

Summary:  Stiles knows he doesn't bring anything to the pack, but if that's true, why does Derek come to him for help?

My Notes: Yes, I’m allowed to have notes on my own works. You should know what you’re getting into. This was essentially self-indulgent twaddle. As my first piece of Sterek fanfiction at all, I wasn’t writing to learn anything or challenge anything. I just wanted things to be good for my boys, and I’m a sucker for Insecure Stiles. It’s just two boys, picking each other up and making it through the day.

~~~

Title: Wanted Rating: Mature WC: 88k Tags: Slow Build, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Mates, Derek Has Nightmares, Pack Mother Stiles Stilinski, True Alpha Scott McCall, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It of Sorts, Alpha Derek, Oblivious Stiles, Emissary Stiles Stilinski, Spark Stiles Stilinski, Season 3 rewrite, Peter Left or Something-He's just Gone, Because I said so and he's stupid, Slow Paced, Sheriff Stilinski is a Good Parent, Puppy Piles, Pack Feels, Stiles Has Panic Attacks, Canon-Typical Violence, Getting Together, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, all the good ones at least, Fluff

Summary:  With the Hale pack finally settled and safe, it only makes sense that something would happen to screw it all up. To top it all off, Stiles has to pretend to be Derek's mate, or face a pack of angry Alphas. He's doomed.

My Notes: This is the sequel to Needed, and it distorts the shit out of season 3 because screw that whole situation. There’s a few stolen moments from the show itself before everything shifts, but only a couple. This was my baby, took me like 3 months to write, and I had to take a massive hiatus because of going back to college near the end of it. It was so worth it to finish. There were a couple people that were disappointed by the lack of explicit content in this, but I’d never written M/M before, and had only even attempted F/M like twice before, so I avoided it. Honestly think it’s still good without. As my second sterek fic, I was absolutely blown away at the response it received, and I gotta say, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

~~~

Title: Gorgeous Rating: Explicit WC: 6k Tags: Protective Derek, Insecure Stiles Stilinski, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Derek is too curious for his own good, Stiles Stilinski Has Low Self-Esteem, Oblivious Derek Hale, Oblivious Stiles Stilinski, not slow burn, More like a roller coaster, like super slow for a little bit, and then it fucking dives into smut, gave me whiplash to write it, let alone read it, Blow Jobs, Body Worship, technically???

Summary: Derek didn’t actually notice anything strange until the middle of the pack’s second year, but once he realized how many layers of clothing Stiles wore all the time, he couldn't stop noticing it. Curiosity and worry ate away at him every time the weather turned warm, until he felt he had to do something about it.

My Notes: Aww, it’s like you guys are following me on my little sterek growth period. This is the only other thing I have finished and posted for Sterek. It was my first experiment with writing anything explicit between the two of them, and I like to think it wasn’t so bad. I think you could maybe consider it a slow burn, but only because the first 4 chapters or so are totally sfw, and then those last two chapters are just a freefall. I’m kinda proud of it, actually. :)

~~~

Alrighty, so there’s the only three sterek fics that I’ve got finished. I have some issues with writing regularly, so it’s become standard practice not to post anything until I’m done with it, so that I don’t leave my readers high and dry. But I’ve got so many ideas, you’ve no clue! Over fifteen different half formed plots, and half written fics and they’re all so interesting to me, half the time I can’t pick one to write in. I hope I eventually have something ready for you guys.

So, in case it wasn’t obvious, my username on Ao3 is Livinginfictions, which is also the username of my main blog here on Tumblr. This is because I don’t just post sterek fics, though recently it’s been all I’m able to think about. Seriously, sterek all the time. It’s not healthy.

Anyway, here you all go. I’ll probably repost this like next month or something, just to test the circulation.

#personal #sterek #fanfiction #personal fanfiction #personal writing promotion

[greenishbucket]

Autumn Serenade

Ford, summer, and hockey. 1.8k, also on ao3.

For Day 1 of OMGCheckPlease! Women Week 2017

Here’s the thing: Ford loves playing hockey.

Her brothers had balked when she’d told them happily over Skype that she’d joined up for the local rec league, no real training but enough vague knowledge and passion to power through. She’s hardly expecting to be on the first line or anything, it’s just fun and exciting and a way to get to know people. Ford’s been involved in local theatre for as long as she can remember – and it’d been the first place she’d looked at when she moved into the area – but stage managing is her forte and it’s a lonely task, the gratitude and respect warming but the responsibilities endless.

Ford can let go in hockey. It’s no contact but there’s the same satisfaction in using careful moves to snatch the puck from the opposition as there is in watching the curtain fall on a perfect show. Only the satisfaction is several times a game rather than a few nights preceded by weeks of organisation and she has a whole team to burn with the satisfaction in time with her.

Her parents had been worried about injury but were easily comforted by the assurance she’d have a full face cage and enough ragtag gear to keep her safe (though she didn’t share how the league had probably had since forever the way it stank). Both her brothers played football well into their college days; her parents are no strangers to accepting their kids playing dangerous sports.

She’s under no misapprehensions about the level of acceptance in the league compared to her usual theatre crowd as her mother suggested, either. Ford knows how hockey is. Besides, theatre kids are so, so far from perfect and Ford’s been black and a lesbian her entire life; she’s not going to let some jackasses stop her from expanding her horizons, especially since she seems to have lucked out massively with her teammates. Lardo, as both her team captain and one of the founders of the league, is both one of the coolest, chillest and one of the most unflinchingly assertive people Ford has ever met.

Ford wouldn’t have let her parents stop her anyway. She’s an adult now, free from college and just about managing to live away from home by sharing her apartment with a squirrely PhD student and a midwife-in-training and carefully budgeting every penny. So what if she wants to portion some of the careful budgeting to the rec league fees, to going out for drinks with the girls after a game? It’s fun, it’s new, it’s giving her thighs to die for.

Here’s the other thing: so far she hasn’t actually played in a real game.

Ford signed up as part of the rec league after coming to watch their final two games before the long summer break. Rec league never really breaks –  or so Lardo and Farms both remind anyone who dare use the term ‘break’, five timetabling spreadsheet tabs open and four group chats pinging continuously on three laptops between them – but summer means people vacationing with family and wanting to be outside in the sun rather than holed up in a scruffy ice rink no matter how hockey-loving Ford knows the girls to be.

There are a couple of games for fun over the months and plenty of street hockey and people can practice as often as they like in twos or threes – plus Heaven knows Ford is busy enough with the local theatre summer production, she couldn’t resist – but their first real league game isn’t until the very end of September. Ford has it circled in red marker on the calendar in the kitchen and every morning she looks at it with a mix of burning hot excitement and sick trepidation.

Until now, Ford has always been a summer girl. Every year as school or college started the transition ached, the first few days spent forcing herself to look away from the windows and focus on work again instead of grabbing hold of the last stretches of real warmth, the sunlight golden and the leaves just beginning to turn brown. She always feels weird and mismatched pulling on her jeans and socks and fall sweaters again, the layers and weight a trap compared to her light summer dresses and skirts and shorts, the ease of simple flats or sandals. Ford loves summer. Everything feels possible and endless on a bright summer’s day stretching out into a warm summer’s night and it revitalises every part of her that gets worn down and exhausted in the decay of fall and the long, cold winter. Spring is a start but nothing gives to Ford like summer does.

This year Ford feels like summer has passed at half the speed it usually does, even now in mid-September the weather reflecting a September dragging its feet on leaving summer behind, and she’s impatient with it. The rush of playing what few games ran during the summer was a wonder but Ford can’t help but think what it could be like in a real game, in something that doesn’t count in the grand scheme of things but counts to her and her teammates in this rec league among rec leagues. She can’t help but see her experiences now as a pale imitation.

Ford is already half in love with hockey and now she wants to play it.

This year each browning leaf and pumpkin-themed Pintrest board and knitted scarf means moving closer to the rec league getting under way for the season. Fprd finds herself watching the transitions with anticipation rather than her usual sadness and the thought of her summer clothes being replaced by the weight of her gear, disgusting though the pads may be, doesn’t have the usual quasi-claustrophobic panic.

“Last day of summer today,” her brother says, eye on his own calendar as they try and figure out a time to meet up over FaceTime. “Always makes me think of you.”

Once when Ford was seven she’d cried inconsolably on the last day of summer even though the weather hadn’t been truly summery in weeks, confusing and worrying both her teacher and parents. It had just been the finality of it, the confirmation that all the opportunities of the summer really were passed. This morning she’d spotted the tiny note in the day’s square and felt a twinge of something, a sadness that it was over for another year and a weariness at the prospect of the aches and pains and boredom of winter, but nothing like when she was seven. Ford’s pretty sure she’d even been a lot more upset the year before, too, wearing summer clothes in protest even when it was cold enough that she was shivering all day.

“I know, I saw,” she says, “and like it sucks, my God fall is boring and winter sucks, but I’ve got my first hockey game tomorrow. Which is pretty cool.”

Her brother is silent for long enough that she looks over at the screen to make sure he hasn’t been cut off. He’s still there, face up close to the camera like he’s trying to get a better look at her.

“Who even are you?” he asks, phone so close all Ford can see is one eye.

“Quit it, your eye is freaking me out.”

“You’re freaking me out. What happened to ‘summer is all that matters, all other seasons are a capitalist cage, I want ice cream but I’m too cold, football can kiss my ass, all my theatre nerds are sick with flu’ blah blah whatever the fuck?”

“I never said any of that!”

“You know what I mean,” her brother finally pulls his phone back a little but the look he’s giving her is still alarmed. “You’re always complaining that summer is over until, like, April. It’s part of my routine.”

Ford shrugs. “I don't know. I guess the game is taking precedence over mourning summer. Fall is so depressing and winter is so cold I can’t go anywhere – I’m looking forward to having enough to do that I'm too tired to miss the sun but also, like, getting to actually hang out with people instead of just bossing them around.”

Her brother considers this then laughs. “Well, shit, if you say so. Maybe we should have tried to get you into hockey when you were younger if it was gonna make you this okay with seasons passing. Remember that time you cried all day? How old were you, twelve?”

“I was seven, you asshole.”

His voice goes high pitched and whiney, a horrible impression of seven-year-old Ford: “Summer’s gone and I don’t want to learn more math I want to go swimming and eat bugs and I hate school and–”

She hangs up on him. A minute later he texts a suitable time to meet up and good luck for the game tomorrow. Seconds later her other brother, probably prompted to do so, texts a reminder to keep her teeth intact if possible. Ford sends both of them back a heart, smiling and genuinely touched in spite of herself, then sets her phone aside to make dinner.

Outside, there’s rain lashing against the windows and the weather report last night had confirmed it was unlikely the weather would pick up again before temperatures started sliding for real. Ford listens to her phone buzzing while she cooks and knows it’s probably one of the girls getting chirped to hell and back in the group chat, checks neither of her flatmates have disturbed the gear bag she’s left by the door for tomorrow.

Spring and summer have always been Ford’s time, the pressure pleasantly on with shows to polish up and perform and the long days to fill, with fall and winter at a pace too slow and unfocused to be satisfying. Ford knows herself and she knows needs to be challenged and kept driven, anything else feels draining. Hockey is giving her direction, not to mention friends she so desperately needed in a new place, and Ford thinks she could love it for that alone.

Luckily, she doesn’t have to. The next night she gets a messy assist and even their team losing in the final minutes after a close three periods doesn’t soften any of the thrumming delight under her skin, doesn’t stop the helmet-taps she receives for getting an assist in her first game (her first game!) or the exclamation marks her family text in response to the news. Not even the cold wind that’s icy against her neck as she stands outside the rink and answers three separate emails on set production can ruin her mood. It's fall and she's still busy enough with things that excite her that she feels the pressure of it, feels the tiredness in her muscles. It's amazing.

Ford loves playing hockey.

Feeling charitable, she gets herself a pumpkin spice latte on the way home. It’s not quite her usual cold vanilla sweet cream, a flavour that’s like a mouthful of summer to her, but Ford thinks perhaps it’s something she could learn to like.

#omgcpwomenweek #check please fic #my writing

[captain-swan-coffee]

Caution Hot

When you combine alcohol, date night, and a hot tub it’s bound to make a pretty damn good night.

Hello Oncers! I can’t believe it’s almost Sunday! I’m so hyped for the season finale! I know there has been some controversy about the season seven renewal, but I for one am excited for what the future hold. I know that this incredible fandom will always be here and I for one will still be writing fic and so will many others! This fandom will stay alive in the stories we continue to tell. I hope you enjoy this new addition to my Captain Swan Coffee collection of one shots. This is dedicated to @deathbycaptainswan for her birthday! Go find her on tumblr and give her some love! I hope you have the best day my fellow Oncer! Eat cake and be merry!

Rated M

Read more of my work here or here!

“A hot tub? That was the name the inventor came up with? Seriously, how original,” Killian mocked staring at the large pool of water that was currently steaming on the backside of their long wrap around porch. Emma wanted to get a pool but they didn’t have enough room in their yard to fit one, so a spa was kind of a compromise. Henry was the one that gave Emma the idea. For weeks he was begging her to buy one convinced that it would make “guys night” with his friends that much cooler.

“I know the name isn’t all that creative but I think you will like it,” Emma insisted, leaning up on her toes to give him a loving kiss to his lips.

“Want to try it out now, Captain?” She smiled, her arms still wrapped around him as little bubbles rose to the surface.

“What the hell. I’ll try anything once,” He shrugged, following his true love back inside and up the stairs to their bedroom. They quickly changed into their suits. Emma wore a new red string bikini that she had a feeling Hook was going to love. Killian slipped on a pair of swim trunks that she had recently bought him that fit him incredibly well. Before now he would just strip down in the nude to swim which was a little more gutsy than Emma felt comfortable with now that Henry living in the house with them. He then slide off his hook and brace before jogging back down the stairs.

“I think I need a drink after the work day I’ve had. Do you want anything babe?” She shouted from the kitchen in very minimal clothing. Today she had to listen to her parents argue over whether or not her brother was going to have a huge royal birthday celebration.

Of course her mother wanted to go all out and invite the entire town to celebrate Neal’s first birthday. But her father on the other hand wanted a small intimate gathering with just family. Emma had no clue what the big deal was. The kid was only one! It wasn’t like he was going to remember any of it anyways! The whole ordeal gave her a massive headache and the only thing that kept her going was the promise of a whole bottle of wine waiting for her in the pantry.

“I wouldn’t mind a rum, love,” She heard him reply as she grabbed them both their drinks and sauntered to the back porch. It was truly a beautiful spring night in Storybrooke. It was warm enough to be outside but cool enough to still enjoy the tub under the stars. It was one of the many things she loved about small town Maine. You could see every constellation in the sky, unlike New York or Boston.

“So do I just get in it?” Killian puzzled looking inquisitively at water.

“Yeah, it’s just like a bathtub, nothing to be afraid of,” Emma laughed, mocking her cautious pirate.

“I’m not afraid, love. Especially of a little water,” He reassured dipping each of his toes in one by one until he settled into the soothing spa. She followed sinking in right beside him. Emma turned around to a panel of controls and pushed a few buttons, turning on the jets. The motion scared Killian so much he practically jumped out of the water. Emma broke out into a hysterical laughing fit almost to the brink of tears.

“Bloody hell! What was that?!” He gasped, attempting to solve the mystery of the powerful stream of water hitting his back.

“Not scared of water, huh?” She smirked, flashing him a saucy smile. Finally a grin formed on Hook’s face after seeing the joy it had brought his Swan.

“They are called jets, Killian. I promise they don’t bite,” Emma giggled, pouring herself a glass of wine.

“I wasn’t scared, they just startled me that’s all,” He remarked sipping on his rum. They used this rare time to catch up and soak up one another’s presence. Killian loved that he finally had his Swan all to himself. He always insisted on weekly date nights, even if it was just watching a movie in their living room or dinner at Granny’s. It was a tradition that she hoped would never die. Killian was lost in his own thoughts when Emma pulled him back to reality.

“So, how was your day? Do anything interesting?” She sighed, breathing in the relaxing spring air letting the warm water melt away all the worries of the world.

“Well, as a matter of fact I did. I took Henry sailing again, but this time he did it completely by himself. He was the captain today and he did a pretty great job if I do say so myself, but he did have a great teacher,” Killian smirked watching the water simmer in the moonlight.

“Thats amazing! I wished I could have seen it,” She replied taking another sip of wine.

“Me too, I missed you terribly today,” He admitted, his cheeks beginning to flush. He didn’t know if it was from the heat or the beautiful woman tucked closely next to him.

“You missed me, huh? Well I have to say I missed you too,” Emma smiled, leaning in, slanting her lips over his. She only intended on giving him a loving peck but she should have known better when it came to Killian. A simple kiss almost never was “simple”. Soon she felt his tongue skim the seam of her lips begging for entrance. Emma granted without a fight. She knew he needed this just as much as she did.

“When will Henry get back from babysitting Neal?” Killian mumbled out between their passionate makeout. His fingers tangled in her golden tresses.

“Not until well after midnight,” Emma moaned as her partner moved to the more sensitive part of her neck, sucking on her pulse point. She knew she would have a mark in the morning but she could bring herself to care. She felt his hand move from her hair down to the back of her neck, slowly pulling the knot undone letting the revealing fabric to reveal even more.

“Killian, we are still in public. We have neighbors, what if they see?” She gasped letting the pleasure envelop her body. He was too tempting to resists. “Oh, fuck it.”

Giving in, Emma let out an audible groan that drove him mad. Killian’s hand traveled down cupping her ass, pulling her onto his lap with ease. She could feel his impressive length teasing her soaked folds through the thin material of her suit.

The tops of Emma’s breasts lightly bouncing above the water was his undoing. They were so perfect, the way they gleamed giving her skin a gorgeous glow. Her suit doing nothing to hide her increased arousal. Her nipples showed through the thin material desperately begging to be touched.

He lowered his head to one of her peaks, tasting the bud. It was a excellent combination of her unique taste and the salty water covering her skin. Killian reached his hand back again to untie the rest of her suit, letting it float in the water without a care. Emma then felt his his fingers snake back to her stomach before slipping his digits through her heat.

“You’re always so wet for me, love,” He growled, his erection now pressing tightly against Emma’s sex. Killian lifted his hips up, while Emma helped him shimmy his trunks down a touch in order to free his manhood from that restricting garment. She gave him a few quick pumps teasing of what’s to come.  They never missed a beat. Reading each others body, wants, and needs just became second nature. He returned to the heat between her legs. She was lush and slick, his fingertips sliding over her. She felt the anticipation building. He circled her tender nub a few times before pushing aside the fabric covering her sex just enough to line himself up at her entrance. Emma moaned at the intrusion, stretching and burning all in the best ways. Her walls expanding to make room for him. She loved the feeling of being completely full. The drag of her slick canal had Killian almost coming on the spot.

She set a punishing pace, driving herself down on him, her lips never leaving his. The hot water splashed all around them. Some even spilled onto the deck, but there was more important things at hand. He could feel her shudder when he thrusted up into her causing a rippling affect of pleasure throughout both of their bodies. Their twin moans mingled in the night sky.

“Fuck Killian, I’m so close,” Emma swore, her breasts locked tightly against his gorgeous forest of untamed chest hair. He dipped his hand back into her bottoms finding her oversensitive clit. Swiping his fingers only twice before he had her coming on his cock. Falling over the edge as pleasure washed over her in waves, but Emma never stopped her ministrations wanting to take him over the cliff with her. It didn’t take long for her partner to follow her. Hot bursts shot up into her, coating her walls as she milked him dry of every last drop.

“You know I think this whole hot tub idea is starting grow on me. I could get used to using it every night,” Killian teased, resting his forehead on hers while they both caught their breaths.

“Wow, every night? Someone’s feeling a bit optimistic,” She giggled smoothing her hands over his biceps.

“Well, you do know that I like a challenge,” He remarked, giving her a cheeky smile.

“Speaking of challenges, would you mind tying my top back up?” Emma asked attempting to push her wet hair off her neck.

“I’m usually better at taking things off instead of putting them back on,” Killian sassed, displaying his one good hand. Before she had the chance to argue back the door to the back porch opened. And there stood Henry who was home a little early from babysitting his uncle.

“Hey is it okay if I invite Violet over tomorrow to use the hot tub?” Henry question looking down at his phone. Emma was completely mortified. The only thing covering her modesty was the tub jets that made seeing through the water difficult but not impossible. Instead of panicking she decided to play it cool and with the look in Killian’s eyes she knew they were on the same page.

“Yeah that should be fine as long as one of us are here,” Emma responded her face and neck red from embarrassment.

“Oh and thanks for taking me sailing today, Killian. I had a great time,” He smiled looking up from his phone. He was wondering why the both of them seemed a little on edge until he saw a red bikini top float from behind Killian. It took him mere seconds to put the pieces together. There was a shared awkward moment between all of them before Killian broke the silence.

“Oh, you see that broke and I was just helping your mother fix it,” He mumbled scratching behind his ear. A nervous tick that he seemed to pick up over the years.

“Okay gross, I’m just gonna go to bed, goodnight,” Henry muttered, booking it up the stairs as fast as he could.

“Broken? Seriously that’s the story you decided to go with?” Emma giggled hysterically reaching for her top that was still floating in the water.

“It was the first thing that came to mind, don’t poke fun,” He smiled assisting her with pulling her hair back. “But it really is a shame that the hot tub will be occupied tomorrow. I really think I’m starting to like it.”

“Well, the good thing is we have a pretty big tub in our master bathroom that we haven’t tried out yet. Do you think we can recreate this experience?” Emma teased, tying the strings of her suit into a bow.

“I think we should most definitely give it a try.”

@teamhook @deathbycaptainswan @kmomof4 @galadriel26 @hook-n-emma @onceuponacaptainswans @asyouwissh @jennjenn615 @captainstudmuffin @captainswansource @captainswanbookclub @sunshine2632 @blowmiakisscolin @dmarien @midnightswans @yourekillianmesoftly @villains-happy-ending @jackieorioncat @lollypopjones @thesschesthair @captainswanluver @buritobaby @golfgirld

As always let me know if you want me to tag or untag you in the future!

#Captain Swan #captain swan smut #cs #cs ff #smut #hot tub smut #date night #fic rec #captain swan coffee #rubyrose82 #emma swan #killian jones #captain hook #semi public sex #cs smut #ouat

[thetoffeeist]

1) Koeman pressure

Now embarking on the second year of his three year plan, Ronald Koeman has had most of the presents he was promised when abandoning Southampton for the ‘Everton project’, recently declaring “everyone now understands why I chose Everton”. Despite still not landing the coveted target-man striker, Koeman can have little complaints towards the board this summer. Which means the pressure is all on him this season to get his players playing, and get them playing very good. If the Blues hit a bumpy patch in the road and some of the more anxious fans with itchy fingers who dreamt of Jose Mourinho as manager become disgruntled, it will be all too easy for them to point at the Dutchman. The pressure will be far greater than fucking up the colour of the tinsel on your Christmas tree. But if ever their was a head on a set of shoulders made for soaking up pressure, it would be the celestial-shaped dome of Ronald Koeman’s. You just wouldn’t want to be a journo at the front row of one of his press conferences during that period. The big Dutch crank.

2) Rooney revived

Wayne Rooney was dead to Evertonians. Or so we thought. A cameo appearance at a Duncan Ferguson testimonial panged the hearts of some of the bitterest Blues, and from that day on it was quietly hoped the prodigal son would return whilst his flame still burnt brighter than most. We all know the story since, Rooney is back, and ‘proving the doubters wrong’ is the journos go to theme of his first few months back on Merseyside. But it’s been spooky how similar some of his iconic moments have been so far, straight re-enactments of goals and celebrations from thirteen years ago. If Rooney was dead to Evertonians, the national press, and the national side, we really could witness an epic revival this season. Like a huge lion bellowing out one last soul shaking roar before it passes off into the night. Rooney undoubtedly has two goals in his mind – end the Everton trophy drought, and score a winning derby goal. It would be a great way to end the story.

 3) Bramley Moore Dock vision

The new stadium at the Bramley Moore Dock site will be placing Everton, and football, at the geographical and architectural heart of the city’s waterfront. It represents Everton Football Club coming in from the wilderness, the end to a forlorn search for a new home which would have always felt third rate behind Goodison Park and the failed Kings Dock dream. The fact we are now going back to the waterfront, claiming the centre of Liverpool as our own in such an iconic location is the most unbelievable development since Farhad Moshiri got Everton all jacked up on money and ambition. What we now look forward to seeing is the architectural designs of Dan Meiss’ vision for the 57k seater stadium. This will be our new home, and our kids’ kids’ new home.

 4) The return of Bolasie

“When I come back I know I’m the full package rather than still needing to do some little things. The hunger is to be back. I want to be back to prove to the fans at Everton what I’m really about.” After suffering a devastating ACL and meniscus injury early in to his Everton career, it remains to be seen how Bolasie will perform on his return, but he has been making all the right noises during his recovery. We saw flashes of his brilliance last season, although the best aspect of that was the link up with his mate, Lukaku (he jibbed you for Pogba, Yannick *spit*), he was always looking to influence the game, even if things didn’t always come off for him. With Everton crying out for options out wide, just how good the winger is on his return could play a massive part in the second half of the season. Yannick Bolasie 2.0 will be eagerly awaited.

  5) The return of Coleman

If we are eagerly awaiting the return of Bolasie, then we are absolutely pining for Seamus Coleman. A class act both on and off the pitch, the whole football club is proud of its flying Irish fullback and was left devastated by his horrific leg break on international duty. Almost five months after that double leg fracture Seamus Coleman is back in training and running again. With early reports suggesting he would be out of action until 2018, it is now hoped he could be back before the end of the year, which would represent an incredible feat of rehabilitation. It will take time after returning to first team action but Coleman’s game is vital to Koeman’s approach. The narrowness of Everton’s play would be remedied by Coleman bombing on down the right, offering assists and goals, as well as solid defensive play and leadership. Manchester City spent £50m for the same reasons this summer. Hopefully all we have to do is wait.

 6) Barkley’s fortunes

Ross Barkley now has no future at Everton, that much is clear. The real reasons behind the midfielder’s decision to reject a huge contract offer to look for ‘a new challenge’ are probably multiple, but it seems as though he is pinning them on Koeman’s public criticisms last season. Criticisms which seemed to induce a reaction from the player who undoubtedly put in some of his best and most consistent performances in an Everton shirt through the second half of the season. Barkley, forever lamented due to poor decision making has revealed that it is immaturity that he is most guilty of. Still only 23, that is a natural problem to have. They say your prefrontal cortex - the part of the brain responsible for decision-making - isn’t fully developed until the age of 24. Wayne Rooney has returned to Everton for all the reasons that Ross Barkley is now turning his back on, but the last person who could lecture Barkely on staying at Everton is England and Manchester United’s all-time record goalscorer. So here we possibly have a little bit of history repeating itself, except Everton do not need to sell their star player’s out of necessity anymore and Barkley’s fortunes away from Everton could look a lot more like those of Franny Jeffers than Wayne Rooney’s. Only time will tell, but it is one to look out for because if it all clicks for Barkley like we hoped it would, at another club, it would be a painful loss for Everton… especially if he ends up leaving for free.

 7) The next academy breakthrough

Everton can spend £45m on Gylfi Sigurdsson but it would take something for the big money signing to match the impact on fans that the Tom Davies goal against Man City last season had. Evertonians love nothing more than seeing one of their own perform on the big stage. The academy is bubbling with talent, and the Ketwig Kaiser is the first in line of a queue of players of a golden generation that it is believed have what it takes to make the step up. As I wrote about a few months ago, Davies was part of a trio of players who earned the nickname the ‘Holy Trinity’ at Finch Farm. The other two being Liam Walsh and Kieran Dowell. By all accounts of his early performances whilst out on loan at Nottingham Forest, it looks like it will be Dowell. However, Jonjoe Kenny is waiting in the wings for the right back slot, should an opportunity arise this season. Blending top quality new signings with top quality academy graduates is the way forward for Everton.

 8) Which of the new signings will make it?

Everton’s summer transfer business currently stands at 13 new recruits, with seven expected to be involved with the first team this season. Wayne Rooney, Jordan Pickford, Michael Keane, Gylfi Sigurdsson, and Cuco Martina all come with Premier League experience. Davy Klaassen and Sandro Ramirez arrive with experience of the Eredivise and La Liga so will be expected to find life at their new club a little harder than the rest as they adjust to the pace of the Premier League. To offset the loss Lukaku and Barkely, the side’s two most productive players in 2016/17, will prove the greatest challenge this season. Pickford and Keane have already improved the side, without a doubt. Cuco Martina has looked precisely the player we was expecting – temporary cover for Coleman. That leaves the pressure on Sigurdsson, Rooney, Klaassen, and Sandro to provide the goals. With Sandro and Klaassen lacking Premier League experience these two will be under most scrutiny. They should both be allowed the time needed to bed in, and patience from fans will be needed.

 9) Winning at Anfield

Since Everton last won at Anfield, Blackpool have risen from the fourth tier to the Premier League, won at Anfield, and fallen back to the fourth tier again. Yeah, we all seen that tweet doing the rounds at the end of the season. The simple law of averages says we are a due a win there, and flukey win with an offside goal would be celebrated hard into the next day but what would be much preferred would be a statement win. Of the starting line up at Anfield last season you wouldn’t expect the following to be on the team sheet the next time around this December: Robles (Pickford), Pennington (Keane), Holgate (Martina), Davies (Schniederlin), Barkley (Sigurdsson), Lukaku (Rooney), Calvert-Lewin (Sandro). It will be a different side to the one that lost 3-1 last time, one that will offer different goal threats and a shored up defence with a massive improvement inbetween the sticks. What would a win at Anfield do for momentum going into Christmas? It would put a huge marker down in the development of this new Everton.

 10) Winning some silverware

Any will do. That stubby cup they give out when we’re all still wearing our winter coats would be sound. A victorious night in Lyon would be even better; that’s a tin pot and Champions League qualification in one go. The dream ticket right there. The last time Everton won something the kids were playing Subbuteo, not FIFA. A whole generation of Blues know nothing but heartache when it comes to actually winning stuff. Above all else this season, if Ronald Koeman could lead Everton to some honours, it would be the clearest sign of the direction the club is going in. It would send shockwaves through the football establishment, who are already noticing that things have changed on the blue half of Merseyside: Moshiri, money, and mentality. Winning is contagious, and all Everton needs now is that spark.

#Everton

[banshee-cheekbones]

title: seasons change (but people don’t) [ao3: here]

main pairing: Malia/Kira

rating: G

word count: ~2300 words

written for: for the Femslash Big Bang April Monthly Challenge (where the prompt was ‘changes’), for the ‘social media au’ square on my Teen Wolf Rare Character Bingo card, and for the following prompt sent to me a few months ago by the lovely @veronicabunch: 

"Kira/Malia + "oh god, oh no, oh shit, oh fuck." "um. excuse me, are you okay?" "do I look okay? my life is a mess."

summary: The one where Malia hates airports but is willing to brave the chaos so that she can finally meet Kira in person

Given the choice between spending four hours in a cage full of rabid wolves and spending four hours standing in the middle of an airport, Malia would choose the former every single time.

Even though she’s never flown before, which means she’s bypassed the parts of travelling that people seem to really enjoy whining about, airports are still a test of patience that she just doesn’t have. There’s too much noise, too much movement, too much damn chaos. Children screaming at the top of their lungs, families standing dumb in the middle of the hallways and causing a traffic jam as they peer down at a smartphone, constant announcements overhead, constant rushes of people racing to catch a flight, the wheels of their bags rattling on the tiled floors; it’s all just so much.

If it was anyone else she was picking up at the airport, even if it was her own family, she’d do the same thing she’s been doing for years: she’d make them come to her, meet her in the parking lot outside the arrivals gate.

But this isn’t just her family. This is her girlfriend.

This is Kira.

She’s never met Kira in person, even though they’ve been talking for almost a year and a half and dating for a little over six months. They met online in a discussion board for young musicians that Malia had been frequenting since middle school, when she’d first fallen in love with playing the drums. She’d been scrolling through the board one day before class when she’d come across a new thread posted by a user named foxfire, asking for advice on what drumsticks would be best for someone with absolutely no experience. Malia had jumped in with advice honed from years of users asking the exact same question and, looking back, it was possible that she’d been a little terse, a little snippy.

Okay, she'd been a lot snippy.

But, to her surprise, her response had been followed up with a private message that revealed that, while foxfire didn’t have experience with the drums, they did have musical training that was on the more classical end of the spectrum. That was followed by a few more specific questions that were follow-ups to the information Malia had provided in her response.

Malia had let the message percolate in her inbox for a few days before she finally answered.

Kira had responded only hours later.

Eventually, once their conversation began to veer away from topics unrelated to music, Malia had sent Kira a link to her blog. They’d followed each other and continued talking, leaving comments and likes on each other’s personal posts.

(It was around that time that Malia had received a number of anonymous messages that were all along the lines of you are so amazing!

She’d brought it up to Kira once, later, once they’d moved to Skype and started talking face to face, or the closest thing to it, and while Kira had denied it, her face had been scarlet as she’d done so, and that had given Malia all the answer she’d needed.)

Eventually, barely an hour went by without them talking to each other. It was easy to forget that they hadn’t been best friends since childhood, so long as Malia didn’t think about the thousands of miles between them.

It’d been Kira who brought up becoming something more, one late night while they were Skyping. Kira had been lying on her side in bed in an oversized sweater, loose tendrils of hair falling from her face, breaking out into yawns every so often. Just when Malia had been ready to hang up and let Kira get some sleep, Kira had snuggled deeper into her pillow and murmured seven words.

“You know, my friends think we’re dating.”

“They do?” Malia asked, feeling herself smiling. “Would that be so bad?” She’d meant it as a joke, something to make Kira blush a little; her own friends had been bugging her about the same thing for months, and Malia would have been lying if she said she hadn’t thought about a few times. If it wasn’t for the sheer distance between them, she would have already asked.

Even with the pixelation of the screen, it’d been easy to see the red flush that had spread across Kira’s cheeks, but instead of simply changing the subject, she’d shaken her head and smiled.

“No. I’d like that, actually.”

Kira’s smile had been contagious. Malia felt like an idiot for how quickly a matching grin spread across her face, but there’d been no stopping it even if she had wanted to.

“Yeah. Me too.”

And now, here she is, waiting in what is possibly the most chaotic environment she’s ever stepped foot in, and Kira’s flight was supposed to arrive twenty minutes ago, but there’s absolutely no sign of her, and every time Malia looks up at the multiple screens scattered around the arrivals area, she just ends up more confused.

If she doesn’t figure something out soon, Kira’s first day with her is going to be a disaster.

“Oh God,” she mutters, stepping backwards to avoid getting run over by an entire family with a massive amount of luggage. “Shit. Fuck."

"Excuse me. Are you okay?"

Malia whips around and expects to find herself staring at a TSA agent, ready to escort her out of the airport for loitering. Instead, she’s met with a man who looks to be her own age, frowning softly with concern, noticeably not carrying any luggage.

“Do I look okay?” she snaps, shoving a chunk of hair away from her face. “My girlfriend’s flight was already supposed to be here, and I have no idea where I’m supposed to wait for her, or if her flight has been delayed, or what is happening. This place is a fucking nightmare.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty confusing,” the man agrees. “My girlfriend isn’t getting in for another half hour. I can help you find your gate, if you want?”

Malia raises an eyebrow. Airports don’t seem like the kind of environment to breed kindness, just panic and stress. “You sure?”

“Yeah! I could have used some guidance the first time I had to pick someone up here. Do you know her flight information?” Malia has screencaps of all the information about Kira’s flights, both her arriving and departing ones, and she brings the photos up, keeping an iron grip on her phone with one hand, just in case this whole offer to help turns out to be a play to try and steal her phone.

Thankfully, the guy makes no attempt to do so. He simply peers at Malia’s screen and nods once before he looks up at one of the huge screens dotting the cavernous room. The scrolling text still looks like gibberish to Malia, but he must find something useful in it, because he nods again and points across the vast room.

“They must have changed her gate for some reason,” he says. “Her plane just landed at gate 12. If we move fast, you should be able to catch her just as she gets out.”

“Lead the way,” Malia says, shoving her phone back in her pocket and taking off across the room at her fastest walk. The guy quickly catches up to her, keeps pace without a struggle (which is a feat, she’s been told.)

“I’m Scott, by the way,” he says, right before he effortlessly steps around a couple who are taking a selfie for some godforsaken reason.

“Malia,” she responds. She momentarily debates on sticking her hand out so he can shake it, but that would just slow them down too much, so she settles for a quick nod. “Do you give complimentary tours of this place often?”

“Honestly, pretty much every time I’m here,” he replies with an easy laugh. “My girlfriend travels a lot for business, so I’m usually here at least once a month to pick her up. There’s always someone who needs the help while I wait.”

“The airport should start paying you.”

“Maybe one day,” he says, laughing again. He slows slightly, pulling his phone from his pocket, and his lips crinkle into a frown. “Speaking of my girlfriend, looks like they got in a little early. Do you mind if I-”

“Go for it,” Malia answers, slowing to a stop, even though every nerve in her body demands that she keeps going, that she get to Kira as soon as she can. “Thanks for the help.”

“No problem!” Scott flashes her a beaming grin before he points ahead, the way they were going. “Gate 12 is just a little further. You can’t miss it.” With that, he turns on his heel and starts easily threading his way back through the crowd, moving against the stream. Malia doesn’t waste much time looking after him; one of the speakers over her head blares an announcement, and while she can only half hear it over the hubbub, she does catch the words gate 12, which means she needs to move if she doesn't want to leave Kira waiting.

By the time she reaches the gate, her stomach is cramping with nerves, and there’s sweat gathering on the back of her neck. She hasn’t felt this nervous in literally years, and the feeling is so overwhelming that she kind of wants to vomit. All the questions, the negative thoughts, that she’s been trying to keep at bay since the day Kira officially bought her tickets to come visit, have rushed up into an overwhelming deluge that she can’t even begin to handle.

The doors connecting the gate to the tunnel leading to the plane open, and a group of passengers start making their way out agonizingly slowly. Even though she has a relatively clear line of sight, Malia still can’t help leaning up onto her toes, searching for Kira.

Her whole body feels jittery. Her heartbeat is pounding in her ears. With every second that passes by without Kira emerging from the tunnel, Malia’s stomach inches further and further up her throat.

Just when she’s ready to find the nearest garbage can, Malia sees her.

She’s one of the last people off the plane, wheeling a carry-on suitcase that’s patterned with red and blue elephants. Her sleek black hair is pulled into two braids that dangle down over her shoulders, and she’s dressed for comfort, in a pair of leggings, neon-orange sneakers and an oversized zip-up hoodie that reaches almost to her knees.

She’s the most beautiful person Malia has ever seen.

Her heart takes the place of her stomach, hovering in the base of her throat.

Kira’s face crinkles with concern as she scans the area, but before Malia can call out her name, Kira finds her, and her face illuminates from within. She smiles wide, and she starts jogging forward, suitcase bouncing along behind her.

Malia means to say something cool, something nonchalant that doesn’t make her sound completely gone on Kira; she doesn’t want to be too obvious, after all. She thinks that maybe a simple hey would be a good place to start.

But before she can open her mouth, she realizes that Kira is about to jump on her, and Malia barely has the foresight to open her arms before Kira crashes into her hard enough to make Malia rock back on her feet. She immediately wraps her arms tight around Kira’s slim waist, just as Kira threads her arms tight around Malia’s neck, tight enough to almost cut off Malia’s breath.

For a moment, they don’t say anything. They don’t move. They simply stay like that, wrapped up in each other, Kira’s toes just barely skimming the ground, mostly held up by Malia’s arms. Malia’s face is tucked into the spot where Kira’s neck meets her shoulder, and every single time that she breathes in, all she can smell is Kira, the floral scent of her shampoo and clean sweat and a hint of fabric softener. When she shifts, her nose drags over the curve of Kira’s neck, and Malia tightens her arms further, until it doesn’t feel like even air could worm its way between them.

She’d known, objectively, how amazing it would be to have Kira in front of her, to be able to actually touch and see her. But knowing that had in no way prepared her for how simply amazing the reality is, how amazing it is to feel Kira’s heart beating in her throat, to feel the simple human warmth of her, to feel her squeeze her arms around Malia’s neck.

It’s infinitely more real and more wonderful than she could have imagined in her wildest dreams.

“You’re here,” she mumbles, moving back slightly when Kira wiggles in her arms. She doesn’t end up far; once their foreheads are touching, Kira locks her arms around Malia’s neck, keeping her from moving back any further. “You’re actually here. In front of me.” Kira nods rapidly, a quiet laugh slipping from between her lips, which are still parted in the brightest smile Malia has ever seen.

“Yeah,” she says quietly, dark brown eyes sparkling with wetness. “I am.” For a moment, it looks like she might say something further, but instead, she leans forward and presses her lips against Malia’s. It’s firmer than Malia expects, but she quickly reciprocates in kind, wrapping her fingers in the back of Kira’s hoodie, biting back a moan when Kira’s fingers twist into the hair falling against the nape of her neck.

Malia can’t believe that she ever thought seeing Kira in person, actually meeting her, would somehow make things different between them, would be awkward and complicated, would change things for the worse.

Things have definitely changed between them; all she needs is one kiss to know that.

But it’s the most natural change of her life, as normal and fluid as switching from inhaling to exhaling and, just like breathing, she has no intentions on stopping, on letting Kira go, anytime soon.

#twfemslash #twrarepair #twrarecharbingo #malira #twpoc #mine #mine: fic #maliakira #this is absolute tooth rotting fluff