#but i just.

[utterdrip]

little things abt astarion i adore:

• just says the most poetic things about completely innocuous and mundane aspects of life

• forgets he’s literally dead and that we know that he’s dead before making jokes out of it

• says the most out of pocket batshit insane things and then looks at us like we’re the weird ones

• has fun joking with us about his ways of seduction — he likes that we’re already in on his plan and taking it in stride

• “you couldve been less obvious about it” meanwhile he can’t keep a straight face to save his life and is so bad at hiding how he feels, no matter the circumstance

#bg3 spoilers #frankie posts #bg3 #astarion #astarion acunin #i’ll be adding to this list eventually as i figure out how to put words to what i love abt him #but i just. #i love him i do

[the-habitat-sysblog]

the only clinician i have ever felt safe enough with to open up about my DID told me today that she is moving halfway across the globe. :-( i'm really upset.

#i understand why #she needs to be with her family #but i just. #i'm going to miss her so much #she's going to try to set me up with another clinician at the same practice #it should be ok #but i'm so sad #blurry❔.txt #; #💬

[shutupdevvie]

i still genuinely cannot believe some people bought the ether pass

#obviously do whatever you want with your money #who am i? the money police? #no #but i just.

[izacore]

how. how am i supposed to not make it about harry and louis when watching this trailer i was having deja vu because i already saw all these scenes in real life. this is what makes it all the more devastating for me, to see harry play out his real life, especially given the last 3 years, it's truly heartbreaking.

#i know it's going to be cathartic for us in some way for sure #but i just. #while i celebrate the fact harry could do this on the screen it also breaks me that he cannot have it in real life #it's devastating #mp #sorry for being dramatic i am going to cry some more and try to calm down

[reluctanttrabbit]

hhhh it just hit me that we still dont know how long ruin takes place after security breach. so how long did cassie spend thinking that gregory, her best friend who went missing, was probably dead? and that one day when she got a message from said friend, she felt a glimmer of hope. she went through an abandoned mall and quite literally put down her favorite animatronic just to be tricked and fall to her death.

#death mention tw #but i just. #hgouhghh they make me want to bite a couch #also im sure cassie lived but like. gregory doesnt know that #cassie fnaf #gregory fnaf #ruin dlc #fnaf #vanny shenanigans

[narrativedoomed]

i havent seen any episodes since 2x3 but i think its SO interesting that the fandom will continuously say ben has no power and that no one cares hes an adult but the moment he doesnt step in to help deliver a baby its suddenly "hes annoying" and "you said yourself youre the adult step it up"

#yj spoilers #also like. as far as im aware he has continued to spiral and hallucinate constantly #and also like. i feel like trying to deliver a baby may be Difficult considering his leg situation bc like. idk how they were set up #but i dont think he can like. sit on the floor and he sure as hell cant kneel since one leg doesnt have a knee anymore #like im sure he probably could've helped somehow but i think. i dont think its fair to constantly emphasize his powerlessness #and then get mad when hes. not using what power he does have #'he taught the health class!!' 'he never learned more than pressing play on the video???' #i cant imagine the gay man would be actively preparing himself to know how to deliver a baby also i dont think that childbirth is like #taught in schools but i could be wrong #saw someone say he should know what to do because 'at his grown age one of his friends would've given birth' but like. its not like #its not like he would BE there for that #me getting defensive of ben without seeing the episode or knowing the context akshwls #its very possible that i will watch the episode eventually and they will be right its true #but i just. #ALSO i see so many people complain that bens even still alive and there bc hes a boy but then they complain when their main characters #are stepping up and doing things while he stays out of it #i think. its also quite possible i dont actually care that much ab this and the person talking just had an attitude and it annoyed me more #everyone in the replies was calling ben annoying and im >:( #ive also just been not in the best mood so i think im just channeling my feelings into this thing that doesnt matter akshskskd #negative cw

[volinare]

i like. can barely read this. barely any mention of why these disorders develop, how they actually work internally (when that was mentioned in other chapters)

literally multiple times like 'these specific ones are super problematic' (literally used the term problematic.

and some of it is just plain wrong. or works off of a philosophy that not everyone subscribes to. like... ugh. its just.

they talk about personality disorders like if you met someone with one you woudl know immediately and like you shoukd never talk to them or theyll ruin your life.

like theyre describing bpd like these people are like monster time bombs or people with ASPD like they dont have an internal world at all.

like i just dont think 'meanness' or 'lying' should be the basis of any diagnosis. I understand why they are included but so much of behavior is influenced by circumstance.

theres also like, I just noticed this (and the next chap is on therapy so maybe theyll talk about it there) but theres like literally no mention of medications or therapy for ANY of these disorders.

it just makes me so fucking. like.

#i probably sound fucking stupid here but #just AAAASSAGGGGGHHHHHHH #strangle strangle kill kill kill cry kill kill eat flesh and burn #edit: when i say any disorders i mean stuff out sode if the personality disorders as well #i know theres not a ton of treatment available for personality disoerderd but treating comorbities (also not mentioned AT ALL) #and talk therapy can help if the person like #wants to or has the mindset that they can manage symptoms #like not everyone with a personality disorder wants too and that like their own deal #but. a big part of that is definitely how people talk and treat personality disorders. and how often people are miss diagnosed #either not diagnosed at all or shoved into a box because their cercumstances fit #like you cant be diagnosed with a lit of disorders untill 18 but so so so many psychologists will still essentially do so #because they think the person is somehow beyond help or like something like that #when the whole point is like they probably still live i whatever houshold caused them the catalyst trauma #and like. im not a fucking expert and a lot of this is probably wrong or nieve #but i just. #idk #edit2: and im not like weh these people are so baby! we should never hold them accountable! its more like. this is literally set up to abuse #like this system is made in a way that the people i power can abuse it easily and no body will say or do anything #and i just dont think it should be set up like that.

[deafleppard]

Not to be dramatic but five Saturdays in a row of rain I’m gonna walk into the Atlantic

#it has rained. 13 of the last 19 weekends #it’s also supposed to rain. next weekend #and I LIKE the rain #but I just. #I have shit to do okay I am so tired of being fucking wet #rain on a Wednesday for once goddamn

[thiefnessman]

re: last reblog: i hate how like, rotted by fandom discourse some proshipper types get to the point that they turn discussions of like, actual CSEM and CSA into being about "antis" before anything else. had an exchange in r/fanfiction a week or so ago where the topic of tumblr's CSEM issue (especially prior to the NSFW ban) came up and someone's response was "you mean CSAM or drawings?". and i was like "ok i cant speak for the commenter above but there was actual, literal CSEM on tumblr it was very much a problem it's literally been reported on, which is probably why they went with the nuclear option re: NSFW content" and their response was just like. "uwuwuwu antis were reporting people's works as CP". like i get this is r/fanfiction so antis are bound to come up but come on.

#like i get that it's a very hot buzzword for many people to use for their own purposes #but i just. #at some point you gotta get your head out of your ASS and realize the real world exists outside of dumb fandom shit #csa tw #ask to tag

[deadwardianpoltergeist]

HELP I WAS WATCHING MARKIPLIER EDITS GIGGLING N SHIT, THEN STARTED CRYING BECAUSE I GOT A RANDOM HIT OF GENDER ENVY AND WHEN I TOOK A BREAK AND STARTED PLAYING MUSIC THIS SONG STARTED PLAYING IM.

#there’s something so horribly fundamentally awful about having to live in a body that just doesn’t work for you #and a traitorous mind that never lets you live and be happy in what you are #like I’m a pretty joyful guy #but I just. #damn #transmasc #trans

[koro-is-caffeinated]

IT'S 1:18 AM BECAUSE I GOT WOKEN UP AND MY BRAIN'S HAVING T H O U G H T S.

I was talking with some friends about how nice it would be to hug Mistrum Calanthe but I had a HILARIOUS image in my head.

You ask them for a hug. They oblige. They kneel and hold their arms open. You walk right into the hug, and their arms link around you, and even with no effort at all you can't wiggle. Free. They stand up. You are still in their arms. They walk away.

THEY ARE

STEALING YOU

#Taking you away for research purposes #Which sounds scary given that they're an alien that's twice your size and very curious about your biology #But instead they just stick you in a room and tell you to do whatever you want while they sit and stare at you #Or hold your face and analyze your bone structure for like 20 whole minutes in complete silence #But I just. #Can you imagine the HORROR you'd feel if this nearly 11 foot tall being hugged you and just. Scooped you up and started walking #YOU'D BE MORTIFIED #EVEN IF CALANTHE IS THE SWEETEST MOST KIND AND WISE PSARI THEIR IS #Anyways ugh idk #Btw if Argyle hugged you? Xey would cry. Lmao #Just start violently sobbing and shaking #Thalasso #I think id cease to exist the second i realize i am very much not touching the ground and on the move #La di da di da I'm being stolen nothin to see here #🦇🫀

[daydreamdoodles]

It is wild to interact with my allo friends who aren't like. In the close friene group tm. And therefore are Not Aware of my sex repulsion. Cause we'll be havin a great time and they will Say Something. Then it'll be like. Oh. Yeah.

#day musings #Like suddenly this space isn't safe #it isn't I'm in danger or anything #It's just #No longer a comfortable space to be in #like I have a friend #He's great #but I just. #He makes seggs jokes #and he makes them about my friend #who he is dating #and I can't stand being in group chats with him #and I never feel fully comfortable around him cause of it #And it Sucks a lot #vagueposting #this wasn't meant to be a downer post #asexual #sex repulsed asexual

[padfootastic]

once again i have basket of compliments that you will listen to without feeling overwhelmed or under selling yourself

idk why i have this hunch that while you're normally a confident bean but whenever someone compliments you you're just like pen.exe has stopped working i need a table to hide under

1) sausaude (also the spellings of these are definitely gonna be wrong) -

the entirety of it just i was screaming on the inside. it's SO GOOD.

IT'S SO GOOD THAT I WANT TO DO A DANDWAT PRANAM FOR IT, don't worry I'm not gonna do it

also if you're worried that the break you took made your writing weak or something. don't. that was a masterpiece you wrote.

but esp the end parts like when sirius finally spoke. and just i for .2 seconds wanted them to reconcile cause they have such a history among them and they're the last ones standing BUT then i remembered it's because of that fucking history they can't cause Remus knew padfoot. knew James. knew their bond. and then this happened so no remus will never get padfoot again and they will live on like shattered glass with a piece missing (James) so they can never fix it. they burned too bright and their sun was taken away and now they're just planets with no sun left to orbit

2) notes app drabbles, the entire series like i just— can't tell you how many times i randomly go back to it to read it in middle of night, whenever i want the oomf and saltiness and it's to a point that i now have lines memorised. and boy didn't that hurt? shouldn't he be used to betrayal from that corner in room hits like a gold mine at 3am idk what to say and also the one where harry says (politely) stfu mrs Weasley.

3) shovel talk!!!! i love it so so so much cause it's the quiet arrogance that does it for me. I'm such a sucker for that. and lily going from confidence to pro max to oh I'm talking sirius back and actually feeling that talk which si retroactively hilarious.

4) I FALL TO PIECES WHEN I'M WITH YOU

so we all are all fucking emotional whores here and definitely not prudes so you know that i have definitely read some serious explicit shit with the straightest face ever.

idk what it is about that fic BUT ISTG I BLUSH LIKE A TEENAGE GIRL WHENEVER I'M READING IT AND YOU SAID IT WAS YOUR FIRST TIME WRITING MATURE/EXPLICIT

bhai i really really could not tell that not kidding comes in top 5 best explicit work I've ever read . it's that good for me.

5 ) i can't just lost all of them na, but it's true like i love little tiny things in all of them that i try to type we'll be here for 375849 hours—the descriptions of tattoos/ sirius's lip ring (which knowing about yours is ehfjfjfjn)/ harry liking smell of cigarette/ RANI/ labor of love and that vivid scene of just a kid on counter mashing potatoes while you add masalas.

you invoke imagination like no other.

FOUNDATIONS OF DEACAY I'm so so looking forward to that cause it's intresting so see what harry will do next

ash you— i— i’m so??? incoherent!??

(stop it stop calling me out, i’ve had people physically restrain me while giving me a compliment because i break out in literal hives and even reading this kept making me hide behind my hands and curl my toes because!!!!)

also!!!! the fact that ur fav fics (saudade, shovel talk, fall to pieces) r literally the ones closest to my heart is so—we’re on the same wavelength fr.

ur way too sweet to be real, ash. i don’t even know what to do w myself rn. pen.exe really has stopped working. needs a reboot.

Tell me what you love about my writing

#it took me like. 2 days to figure out how to reply to this #bc i am OVERWHELMED #also overheated #ur so!!!!!!! good!!!!!!! #idk what i did to deserve it but thank u thank u #and the fact that u have!!! lines!!! memorised omg #that line is literally one of my favs too 😭😭😭 #(harry’s love for cigs is also projection sksksks) #but i just. #very Speechless. #ppb #pen’s asks

[almightynewt]

Ouhghhhhghhhehehhhooughh

sneezed to ghhwhhojhjk

#echidna #this makes no sense i know #but I just. #look at it