#autogenes training

[nerdwelt]

Tägliche Entspannung: Wie man Körper und Geist beruhigt

Erholung im Alltag: So beruhigen sie Seele und Geist Im hektischen Alltag ist es wichtig, sich immer wieder einen Moment der Ruhe zu gönnen. Doch wie gelingt es, Seele und Geist zu beruhigen? In diesem Artikel geben wir Ihnen wertvolle Tipps für die Erholung im Alltag. 1. Schaffen Sie sich eine Oase der Ruhe Um sich im stressigen Alltag zu erholen, ist es wichtig, sich einen Rückzugsort zu…

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#Autogenes Training #Meditation #Smartphone #Yoga

[qyrorelief]

At Qyro, Our Autogenic Relaxation training is scientifically proven to tackle stress and burnout, strengthen your immune system while increasing your physical and mental performance. Visit the website or mail us at [email protected] to schedule a quote.

#autogenic relaxation technique training #autogenic training exercises

[octuscle]

Browth Spurt

Martin, Michael and Christian were interns at promaxx, one of the fastest growing venture capitalists. promaxx specialized in biotech, and the board's dream was to find the first unicorn capable of bionically optimizing humans.

"If they were able to do that, they hadn't done a good job on themselves," Martin whispered to Michael. He had to stifle a laugh. There were indeed a couple of rather ridiculous-looking nerds in the "growth spurt" presentation. They were talking about a combination of pills and autogenic training, which was supposed to unleash undreamt-of powers in men. There was actually a pile of CDs and a few packets of pills on the table in front of them. Images of men screaming "Alpha" from every pore flickered across the projector.

The promaxx product manager had either heard Martin or read his mind. In any case, he asked why the young men didn't look like the ones whose images had just been projected onto the wall. One of the start-up nerds, who weighed a maximum of 70 kilograms at around 200 cm tall, began to stammer that they weren't quite sure yet what the side effects on the psyche would be and that their minds were, after all, the company's greatest asset. Christian, who has always been a bit cheeky, laughed and said that this might not be a good starting point for entering the market. The product manager gave him a high five and added that he was not interested in hearing more, he was sure that everyone present could do better with their time, the meeting was over.

The start-up entrepreneurs from "growth spurt" stood there with their mouths open. They had expected everything, but not such an early termination. The product manager left the room without saying goodbye. Martin and Christian followed in his footsteps. Only Michael stayed for a moment, tried some comforting small talk and then left. The nerds packed up their things in disappointment and left the meeting room.

"Why were you still talking to the losers? "Christian asked Michael. Christian opened his jacket and took out a pack of tablets and three CDs. "That's why," he said with a grin. "We'll see what this stuff is worth now. And if it can become a unicorn, we can say we've discovered it."

That evening, the three boys lay in their beds. The tablets with a glass of water on the bedside table. The CD inserted in a player. They had all had to search a little to find something that could play this ancient media. The three of them chatted on their chatroom.

Michael: Have you already Martin: Nope Christian: Nope Michael: I've put the CD in, but I can't hear a thing. Christian: Same here. Martin: I've swallowed the pill! Michael: Okay, me too now Christian All for one, one for all! …

Christian fell into a deep sleep relatively quickly. His boner built an impressive tent in his bed. At some point during the night, he had a wet dream and blew an incredible load. And then once again. And then once more. And then he woke up.

Christian: Shit, are you awake? Christian: Shit, shit, shit! Michael: Bro, it's 05:00. A bit early for the gym. Martin: You say, weakling! I've been up for half an hour doing push-ups and squats.

Christian sits up. He burped. Must be from the pills. Like the puddle he had slept in. And that body that had torn his pyjamas to shreds. Martin sent a photo of a monstrous bicep with the comment "Then I'll see how I can get it to burn." Something was different. But Christian didn't know what…

Christian: Bros, I must have overdone it a bit, I don't fit into my clothes anymore. Michael: Same here, bros, had to train naked. Shit, my cock rubs against the floor during the push-ups and doesn't get limp at all. Martin: I was just at my brother's. His clothes fit me reasonably well. I'll pick you up and bring you something.

Christian went into the shower. His three-day beard went perfectly with his dark complexion. No need to shave today. His parents were still closing up when Michael and Martin pulled up outside the house. Christian opened the door, naked as God had made him. "You're a fucking statue, bro," Martin said as he handed him a pile of clothes. Christian posed. The light from the hall lamp cast his shadow on the early morning street. The milkman gawked. And almost had an accident.

"So, bro! We think you should think again about the nerds from yesterday," Michael said to the promaxx product manager. He just looked at them. He didn't notice any change. The three junior managers looked impressive as always. The fact that they called him "bro" flattered him. "Sorry, big boys, but the rejection is already out."

Christian looked at his bros and asked, "Do you think what I think?" "Shit, when I see you, I always think the same thing, stud!" said Martin. He obviously wasn't wearing any underpants. And he was leaking plenty of precum. "Michael grabbed his crotch and said "Let's fuck the guys from "growth spurt". Christian grinned. "At least there's one here who hasn't fucked his brains out or swapped them for brawn."

The three of them had quite a problem getting into the Uber. The driver said that with three guys that big, he would definitely need a gas surcharge for being overweight. The three boys laughed uproariously as if it was a good joke. They liked it when people admired them. And they were indeed admirable. "Stop, Taxi-Bro," yelled Mike. They had just passed a store selling gym gear. "We need to get in there quickly," he added. "Dude, you're a lifesaver," said Chris and gave him a fist bump. Martin's brother's suits were just too tight. And you couldn't show them off. And the sun was shining. Sun's out, guns out. Their motto is college days. Hehehe, they didn't do much other than hang out in the sun on campus. They were living proof that you could build a career on good looks alone.

"Damn, don't you think you should at least cover your nipples?" asked the Uber driver. "And what the hell is so smelly here?" Martin let his pecs dance in the back seat. "Bro, don't talk, drive! In tank tops, my monster pecs are like prison!" And in the passenger seat, Mike crossed his arms behind his head in such a way that the driver almost fell into the bush in his armpit. "Stink? All I smell is man musk". Christian farted a huge protein fart. "Not only musk, bro." The three bros laughed. The driver stepped on the gas, hoping the tip would compensate for at least some of the pain this ride was causing him.

The CEO and CFO of "growth spurt" looked helplessly at the three men, who could barely get anything past their lips apart from "dude", "bro" and "sick big muscles". The guinea pigs they had experimented with so far had also developed a powerful sex drive and tyrannized all the other reference animals. But at least they hadn't been tattooed and had smelled like a gym locker. Mike, Chris and Martin would make great advertising characters after all. Maybe they'd be able to collect equity that way. And they would need it. At least now they had three extra mouths to feed with a massive appetite for cum and protein.

Pics made @ki-kink

#male tf #muscle tf #reality change #inked man #ai image #age progression #bro tf #broification

[carlsdarling]

Hello friend! Can you do some Carl x reader with high functioning adhd pls? By hug functioning, I mean intense mood swings, extremely forgetful, super low stress tolerance, gets frustrated very easily, etc. Maybe with a bit of smut :)? 💜

Carl x ADHD! Reader headcanons

Y/N has ADHD, but Carl has gotten used to it... Everyone is 18 or over.

WARNINGS: lowkey smut, nsfw

When everyone else is annoyed by your constant restlessness, Carl doesn't mind at all; he's always suggesting activities - usually sex first, of course he means it totally unselfishly *cough*.

Carl and you share a bedroom, so he inevitably notices when you can't sleep again. While the bed is big enough that he could just shift away from you and sleep himself, if he's not completely exhausted and passed out, he'll stay awake with you; you'll watch movies, kiss, sleep with each other, and play video games until you're eventually able to fall asleep.

Carl isn't particularly tidy himself, but he often cleans up after you - especially in the bathroom, because Rick and Michonne get annoyed when one of you leaves it messy.

Carl is used to you not being able to sit still and constantly rocking your feet, crossing your legs, biting your fingernails, and not being able to concentrate on anything. When being active is not possible, for example at important meetings in Alexandria, Carl takes your hand and holds it.

He reminds you of the things you forget. While Denise has taught you to write lists to structure yourself and your daily routines, you often misplace those lists or completely forget to write them at all.

Other people think you babble too much, too fast, and too much nonsense. Carl doesn't mind, he thinks it's cute.

Carl finds your mood swings interesting because they are so unpredictable. He sometimes teases you about it ("Are you on your period again? Okay, at least you're not pregnant then.").

When you're out in the woods or on a scavenging trip, you never run out of energy - Carl admires and envies you for it.

Carl has taught you a few techniques to calm down and focus. For example, he's picked up books on autogenic training and meditation and practiced that with you. But his favorite way to relax and relieve stress remains sex. Not that you would feel any different. You two literally can't keep your hands off each other, and at times your libido is even greater than Carl's - not that he is bothered by that, he likes to sacrifice himself for the good thing....

Rick often gets upset that you are erratic and inattentive during your guard duties. He initially didn't understand what ADHD even meant until Carl calmly explained it to him. Since then, Rick has been more understanding of your moods, and you're always assigned to guard duty with Carl or Enid, since they're the two who can handle you best.

Some foods - especially cola or coffee - exacerbate your ADHD, so Carl tries to keep you away from it what you don't like. You argue about this a lot.

Carl likes your tics. To him, that makes you special.

You have anger attacks in which you lose your temper and throw objects. Carl then holds you tight, presses you against him and murmurs soothing words in your ear until it's over.

--

Tags: @loveforcarl @knochentrocken0808 @taylormarieee @tessasweet @enid-rhee-things

#the walking dead #twd #carl grimes fanfiction #carl grimes x reader #carl grimes #carl grimes x y/n #carl grimes imagines #carl fanfiction #carl grimes smut #carl grimes fluff

[binaural-histolog]

Inductions Set the Scene

I've been digging into different kinds of inductions lately for the guide and something stood out. The guide goes through different kinds of inductions in order to help you become a better hypnotist, and there's a long history of inductions.

But as far as science can tell, there's not really a distinguishable difference between inductions in terms of increased suggestibility, and some question if inductions increase suggestibility at all. In fact, you can increase suggestibility without induction, via CSTP or the active imagination model.

So what are inductions... for? Why use them?

Most inductions have the following things in common: an extended period of focused attention, resulting in absorption and an altered state of consciousness. Any kind of sustained focused attention can qualify as an "altered state" -- from meditation to "highway hypnosis" to subspace, although hypnosis is the original source of the term.

The term "altered state of consciousness" is also used to refer to coma and LSD based hallucinations, and so it may be more useful to think of hypnosis in this context as a mindset or a frame of reference.

Most hypnotic inductions are generally focused on activation of the parasympathetic nervous system through interoception. It's all about relaxation and slowing down, producing a "trance." More research has been focused on this state of mind than any other, including some fun explorations of neurophenomenology of hypnotic depth.

But hypnosis isn't trance. Trance is the result of suggestions given by a specific type of hypnotic induction. There are inductions that produce altered states of consciousness that don't look like a classic hypnotic trance.

If you want to break down hypnotic inductions by effect, you can distinguish five general categories:

Relaxation inductions: ask you to "sink deeper", ranging from PMR to Esdaile state, Ultra-depth, Sichort state etc.

Alertness inductions: ask for focus, such as active-alert, valencia style waking hypnosis. My monotropism induction would fall into this category.

Mind Expansion inductions: inductions that focus on "trippy" visualizations such as Terrance Watts / ultra height / hyperempiria.

Dissociation inductions: attempt to stun the subject's sense of reality, such as fractionation, confusion, contradiction, and instant inductions.

Depersonalization inductions: focus on obedience through repetition and monotony, i.e. mantras, affirmations, or autogenic training.

There are more inductions that aren't covered, i.e. inductions with a sensory component (gooning, bambi) or involving stress (subspace, mindfucks, gaslighting, fear play) add physical components above and beyond your standard butterfly induction.

Don Gibbons has a great summary.

If the perception of one's own awareness is a subjective phenomenon or an epiphenomenon, as behaviorists have long maintained, then the total number of possible role patterns involving "altered states" (or altered experiences) of consciousness which may be induced by means of suggestion should be roughly equivalent to the number of definitions of such states which it is possible to conceive or to imagine; for each of these imagined definitions may be communicated to a responsive S in the form of suggestions which define for him the nature of the changes which he is about to undergo in the perception of his own awareness.

There's a common trope that some hypnotic inductions are more powerful than others, or that there's some magic incantation that you can use that make suggestions irresistible.  The truth is the other way around: effective suggestions work because the scene has already been set by the pre-talk and induction for the suggestion to work in that context.

If you want to help your partner destress after a hard day, use a relaxation induction. if you want to train your partner in a new skill, use an alertness induction. For dollification, use a depersonalization induction. And so on.

#binauralhistolog #hypnosis #induction

[robustcornhusk]

complaining about people who are wrong on the internet, because i was trying to see how much running people were doing for their first <1:40 half

comments about someone who was 24/male trying to break 1:40:

Honestly, at your age, I didn't have to do anything to run a half under 1:40. Even my friend whose main sport is Judo ran under 1:40.

I didn’t really have to do anything to break 1:40. Just being young and at a decent weight gets you 90% of the way there…

went and checked the results from the half i ran last fall.

overall, 308/2662 (11.6%) of finishers ran under 1:40:00

restricting it to men's 20-29, 101/481 (20.1%) of finishers ran under 1:40:00

sub 1:40 is more than respectable, fuckheads!! you still beat 80% of all men 20-29! that kinda-sorta implies that most men in that age would struggle to run a 1:40!

as far as i can tell, every single soccer player comes out of the woodwork to talk about how they'd never run a day in their life before their first race, they just showed up and did a 90-minute half.

this is of course embarrassing for me&others, because it turns out the soccer players spend more time running than many runners (this is probably how donald thomas's not-yet-teammates felt: some random basketball player at their university turned out to be better at high jump than all the track&field athletes.) but at least i don't pretend i'm not trying really hard.

also extrapolating from how @autogeneity trains, i'm not totally surprised that someone whose primary sport is a form of martial arts could do a 1:40 half. 3 hours of sparring and pushups... i'd die.

#fake jock bullshit #having said all that i'm pretty confident that my next half will be safely under 1:40 #having had a week and a half to come to terms with that really nice result from the 5k #but... maybe my watch AND the chip timing mats at the last race were off by over a minute #i'd better go do it again soon to be sure

[autogeneity]

Why "autogeneity"? What does it mean to you?

well it's self-creation, or rather the property of being self-creating, I suppose, specifically applied to creating myself

I was coming up with usernames for a fitness sideblog, and thinking about how my training in combination with my transition is like an act of building a body — admittedly more a transformation than a creation, but nonetheless a forging

and then all the personality rebirth and construction stuff that's a lot to go into but long-term fans are probably familiar with lol. I am ongoingly building a self

I also find some vague appeal to the sense of 'auto' not as in 'myself' but as in 'by itself' or 'spontaneously' — that not only am I willfully forging a self, but this 'coming into being' and life in general is also a process that simply...occurs

#asks #padeko #meta #ref notes

[nalyra-dreaming]

I guess some version of the train scene did happen, but Claudia crying & cowering did feel OOC. Especially as she's suddenly fearless & goading Lestat in every scene after. IMHO Louis put his own spin on it. He's trying to soften her, as he did in ep7 when he claimed she 'grieved' for Lestat. I don't think the OOC-ness was due to Daniel's interpretation either, he's more cynical when it comes to Claudia (plus I'm not even sure if he was fully conscious by that point of the interview lmao)

Hmmm.

I agree that I would put her tears more into the "angry/frustrated" category as well, and I do believe that the more "fearful" part is from Louis' perspective, maybe. Claudia was told to be the one openly confronting Lestat, even after ep5, and as such... I wouldn't go so far as to say OOC. But definitely colored by Louis' own feelings.

Claudia is more vampire than both of them, and I agree that he wanted to protect her - and himself at that, because what happened also reflects onto him, of course.

And re my comment on that in the other ask that we don't know which POV we're on - I didn't necessarily mean that it's Daniel's direct interpretation. More a... visualization while falling asleep, and someone tells you a story. And then you dream what is being told.

Autogenous training also uses this method I believe.

And a scene like this in this show... :)))

#Anonymous #amc iwtv #iwtv #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc #iwtv 2022 #interview with the vampire #iwtv claudia #claudia de lioncourt

[classyconnoisseurkitty]

Of course! Here are some additional relaxation techniques that you can try:

1. Body scan meditation: This involves lying down and focusing on different parts of your body, starting at your toes and working your way up to your head. As you focus on each body part, notice any sensations you feel and try to release any tension you might be holding in that area.

2. Guided imagery: This involves using your imagination to create a calming scene in your mind. You might picture yourself in a peaceful natural setting, such as a beach or forest, and focus on the sights, sounds, and smells around you.

3. Autogenic training: This technique involves focusing on specific sensations in your body, such as warmth or heaviness, and using your imagination to help promote relaxation.

4. Tai chi: This gentle exercise involves slow, flowing movements that can help promote relaxation and reduce stress.

5. Music therapy: Listening to calming music can help promote relaxation and reduce stress. You might try listening to slow, instrumental music, nature sounds, or white noise.

Remember, the most effective relaxation technique is one that you enjoy and can practice regularly. Try experimenting with different techniques and find what works best for you. It's also important to remember that relaxation techniques work best when practiced regularly over time, so try to make relaxation a regular part of your bedtime routine.

[drosenkatzen]

Loki macht autogenes Training 😹😹😹❤️

#drosenkatzen #katze #feline #miau #meow #my cat #cute #cats #hauskatze #cat #drosenloki

[gellojcldn]

Despite all the things I’ve been doing over the past few months, including working three days a week, spending quality time with family, maintaining my physical and mental health through working out, enhancing the skills I have especially photography and editing, learning new essential life skills from YouTube and Google, trying to listen to podcasts from highly intellectual individuals, exploring different cultures from different places here in the UK, taking care of my nephews from time to time, supporting our family business back home, reading non-fiction books, socializing and trying to gain more knowledge from friends and strangers, and so on.

I continue to feel unsatisfied, as though I still have more to accomplish, and I continue to look for a higher meaning in life. Although I may not find it right away, I am confident that I am winning and that I am on a "good" route.

All I need to do now is learn how to prioritize the things I want and need. To say no to any distractions that prevent me from going after what I desire. To be patient while waiting. To enjoy the process and each step of it. To effectively manage my time and plan my schedule. And to avoid emotionally draining toxic people and those with a negative mindset.

Anyway, I decided to help my cousin with his online training course, a decision I now regret. Answering 50–90 pages every module, all essays. Although it's destroying every neuron in my head, I'm learning a lot from it. For example, I have recently learned about autogenic and reciprocal inhibition in the muscles.💪

[nerdwelt]

Bushido - Seine lange Leidensgeschichte mit einer Krankheit

Rapper Bushido offenbart persönliche Herausforderungen Der bekannte Rapper Bushido (44) präsentiert sich normalerweise in der Öffentlichkeit als entspannter und cooler Typ. Mit seiner gelassenen Art vermittelt er den Eindruck, dass sein Leben reibungslos läuft. Nun jedoch enthüllt der 44-Jährige in einem ausführlichen Interview für seinen RTL-Podcast, dass es in seinem Inneren anders aussieht.…

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#Autogenes Training #Malediven

[geekpress]

Ausbildung Diplom Coach Autogenes Training Schweiz

Die IPC Akademie AG stellt eine breite Palette von Kursen und Seminaren zur Verfügung, um das Diplom als Coach für Autogenes Training in der Schweiz zu erlangen.

Visit Autogenen Trainings Ausbildung

#Autogenen Trainings Ausbildung #Autogenen Training Diplom #Autogenen Trainings Ausbildung Schweiz

[octuscle]

Everyone keeps talking about chronivac. So I thought I'd try it out and I did. I thought I could change into an alpha rubber master, but it didn't work. So much for pleasing every customer ...

Everyone keeps talking about chronivac. So I thought I'd give it a try, and I did. I thought I could switch to an alpha rubber master, but it didn't work. So much for pleasing every customer …

Maybe a little autogenic training or meditation will help. There really are customers who are very hard to stay calm and polite with. Oops! Did I say that out loud? I apologize for that.

Your transformation has been started properly. But it is still running… Your pristine white Egyptian cotton shirt has already disappeared into thin air. But your upper body is already decorated for your new role. Okay, the jeans don't fit yet, just like your hairstyle…

Your hair is getting shorter and shorter. You feel stitches on your skull… Yes, you are starting to look like the target you have configured. Not a bit of fabric left on your body. And the latex slowly but surely stretches over your body. Soon the muscle growth will start. And then come your piercings.

I'm sorry that the transformation is taking longer than you might have wished. But I'm sorry, has actually been configured by you so. In an hour everything should be through. I hope that Chronivac has pleased another customer.

Pics of your transformation found @fanofshoes44

#male tf #reality change #chronivac #male transformation #inked man #rubber tf

[nikitajobson]

Harness the Power of Your Subconscious Mind with Brainwave Entrainment

Mapping of the human brain and its various frequency states occurs recently and thus the find out more here two technologies were combined to become one of the most powerful self-improvement tools since the discovery of meditation.

The subconscious mind is the intangible controlling entity that exists below the planar existence of conscious awareness. It operates deep inside the cortex of the mind and is said to have a level of awareness that is not perceivable by any sort of instrumentation, and only late in the 21st century was science able to identify where in the cortex it is said to operate. The forefathers of this term were Pierre Janet and Sigmund Freud who were the early investigators of the mind and all its forms. Early methods of influencing the subconscious included the use of affirmation prayer and positive thinking to influence the mind for a positive outcome.

In the medical industry, psychologists use the power of methods like autosuggestions and autogenics; which is essentially the training of the subconscious to accept as true messages or mental associations through the use of self-induced hypnotism. The subconscious is then allowed to absorb these stimulations and thus get ‘reprogrammed’.

This has been used extensively to treat disorders like ADHD, ADD, autism, Alzheimer’s, Hodgkin’s disease and even serious forms of addiction. The method is using a bombardment of thoughts and suggestions to the individuals mind until it is bent into a sort of iron belief or automatic response - telling someone that they should stop smoking over and over again and presenting horrid images of cancer (associated with smoking) is one method of autogenics. This is fairly intricate in its execution and is not viable for the average consumer, more likely to be placed in an uncomfortable controlled environment for the experimentation to succeed.

Other forms of brainwave entrainment also include magnetic fields, bio feed backs - forms which are also not consumer level products. Thankfully many companies have been producing CD’s or subliminal music laced with binaural beats -  a great way to induce the right frequency states in the brain through the use of variable frequency engineered sound that is beyond human range. In this form, the technology is now available for the average consumer who is interested in personal development. While technically discovered in the 1800’s by one Heinrich Wilhelm Dove, it has been refined by years of research and scientific enhancements. Mapping of the human brain and its various frequency states only occurs recently and thus the two technologies were combined to become one of the most powerful self-improvement tools since the discovery of meditation.

Being able to evoke frequencies that range from below 1 to 40 Hz can produce a wide range of health benefits from higher mental activity, overcoming of fear, and increase in confidence, change of behavioural patterns and increase cognitive powers.  One of the better applications of brainwave entrainment is the evocation of the theta and alpha waves, which slips the mind into a deep relaxed state that is akin to a meditative state - a prime state in which one can influence the sub conscious to kick negative habits, improve behaviour and increase ambition and drive for life. With binaural beats and sound, you can harness the power of your subconscious mind with brainwave entrainment.

#youtube

[inkognito-philosophin]

Jasmin - Verletzungen in der Psychotherapie

Jasmin und der große Knall

Jasmin Reis schreibt mir in ihren Mails vom 20.05.20 und 26.06.21 auf meine Frage, ob sie sich in psychotherapeutischen Behandlungen mitunter verletzt gefühlt habe:

“Ich kann ja in der Hinsicht nur von mir sprechen und mal kurz aus dem Nähkästchen plaudern. Ich hatte einen Therapeuten (tiefenpsychologisch fundiert) mit knapp 18. Mit dem hab ich nicht geredet weil ich es damals rein gar nicht konnte.

Irgendwann, ich weiß nicht so genau, wie viele Stunden es waren, ich glaube aber es waren so höchstens zehn oder zwölf, da hab ich allen Mut zusammengenommen und ihm gesagt, dass das alles keinen Sinn hat. Dass ich nicht in der Lage bin, über meine Kindheit etc. zu reden (es war eine Tiefenpsychologisch-fundierte PT), dass es sinnvoller ist, über meine jetzigen Defizite zu reden und nicht über irgendeinen vergangenen Mist, und ich doch eher eine VT anstrebe.

Dann kam der große Knall. Der Therapeut sprang auf, völlig außer sich. Machte mir lautstark Vorhaltungen, dass ich doch das Allerletzte wäre und unkooperativ. Den Hammer hat er gebracht, als er sagte – und das werd‘ ich nicht vergessen:

"Sie werden eine Verhaltenstherapie sowieso nicht genehmigt kriegen, weil Sie die Stunden hier schon verballert haben!"

Dann hab ich gesagt: „Dann kann ich ja jetzt auch gehen.“ Und bin gegangen.

(Und da hab ich mir total unsicher und idiotisch komischerweise, und ich weiß überhaupt nicht warum, meine erste Schachtel Zigaretten gekauft - und es ging mir gut damit, auch wenn ich mich fast nicht getraut hab‘, in der Öffentlichkeit zu rauchen.)

Ich bin mal wieder falsch …

Ich habe es nicht verstanden. Ich hab mich gefragt, warum der so abgeht. Ich habe mir Vorwürfe gemacht, gedacht: „Was stimmt nicht - MIT MIR?“ Ich habe mich gefragt, was ich falsch gemacht hab‘, weil ich dachte, es ist doch aber wichtig zu sagen, wenn es nicht passt, das gehört sich doch so.

Da hatte ich mal eine eigene wichtige Meinung, und dann straft der mich so ab ... Ich wollte aber funktionieren und gut und annehmbar sein!

Ich habe gelitten, ich hatte ein schlechtes Gewissen, ich hatte die Bestätigung, dass ich mal wieder falsch war. So wie es immer war. Damals zumindest, rückblickend sehe ich das zum Glück anders.

Schlaf gut!

Ich hatte danach einen Therapeuten (VT) […] Es ging mitunter darum, dass ich ruhiger werden […] und den Anspannungspegel runterschrauben muss.

Irgendwann war er der Meinung, wir machen mal autogenes Training. Er hat dann so eine leiernde Kassette (ja, gab es damals noch) angemacht, meinte, ich solle mich hinlegen, die Augen schließen und zuhören und mitmachen. Na gut. Dann mach ich das mal.

Ich habe es nicht ausgehalten, weil der Therapeut nach kurzer Zeit eingeschlafen war und geschnarcht hat.

Das waren mehr oder weniger amüsante Minuten. Als die Kassette dann zu Ende war,

wusste ich nicht, was ich machen sollte – der Therapeut schlief!

Ich hab ihn dann irgendwann angesprochen und gesagt: „Die Stunde ist vorbei.“ Und bin weg. […]

Patientinnen, die aus Wolken fallen …

Ausschlaggebend, dass ich dort die Therapie nicht weitergeführt habe, ist folgendes: Da ich ja nicht geredet habe und angeblich immer alles schick war, hat mir der Therapeut eine (wahrscheinlich für ihn wichtige) Frage gestellt. Die Frage war: "Kann es sein, dass Sie mehr für mich empfinden und sich deshalb nicht trauen, mit mir zu reden? Ich habe das Gefühl, es macht so keinen Sinn."

Da bin ich aus allen Wolken gefallen. Auch das hab ich damals nicht verstanden. Warum stellt der mir so eine Frage, was stimmt nicht mit ihm? Hat er sich vielleicht irgendwas eingebildet? Ich hab‘ dem bestimmt keine schönen Augen gemacht! Ich doch sowieso nicht! Der spinnt doch! Also, so toll war der nun auch nicht …

Hüte dich vor Leuten, die dir helfen wollen!

Ja so war es. Und das hat mich damals echt geprägt. Sowas macht unsicher. Sowas muss nicht sein. Ich muss doch sowieso immer aufpassen, was ich sage. Immer vorsichtig sein. Also früher. Ich habe niemals einen einzigen Gedanken darüber verschwendet, dass ich den irgendwie gut finden könnte. […]

Warum nicht gleich so??

Dann habe ich es […] geschafft, einen Therapeuten zu finden, bei dem ich mich vom ersten Moment an wohl gefühlt habe und ich sofort wusste, das wird was. Klar dauerte es, aber ich habe sehr viel mitgenommen und wäre jetzt nicht auf dem Stand, wo ich jetzt bin. Es gab wenig Komplikationen, und wenn, dann war ich diejenige, die blockiert oder gezickt hat.

Es war immer harmonisch, und ich hatte immer das Gefühl, es ist okay, einfach nur DA SEIN zu dürfen. Ich will mich nicht aus dem Fenster lehnen, aber das waren die besten Zeiten meines Lebens. Ich habe gelernt, dass es okay ist, dass es mich gibt, gelernt, dass Gefühle zwar Scheiße sind, aber doch irgendwie vorhanden.

Und ich habe es bewusst mitbekommen, dass es außer Lug und Trug und Gehässigkeit auch noch was anderes im Leben gibt. Ich habe lernen dürfen, dass ich doch in irgendeiner Art und Weise wichtig bin und es sich nicht immer darum dreht, nur zu funktionieren. Ich durfte Schwäche zeigen – wenn ich es zulassen konnte. Ich durfte frech sein – na das bin ich von Haus aus – aber das war in Ordnung.

Ich hatte nicht einen einzigen Moment in der Therapiezeit, wo ich dachte, ich wäre fehl am Platz - was ich leider zu oft noch denke. Ich fühlte mich sicher und […] geborgen. […]

Konzepte, aber …

Ich habe nun einen Therapeuten […] der sich starr auf sein Therapiekonzept fokussiert. Das gestaltet sich schwierig, wenn man mit mir Therapie macht. Dafür denk ich, glaub‘ ich, zu weit. Und wenn ich mir von Haus aus meine Fragen selbst beantworten muss und soll, dann brauch ich da ja im Grunde auch nicht hin. Dann kann ich mich ja auch vor den Spiegel stellen und Selbstgespräche führen.

Nicht so ganz einfach.

Und diese ganzen Diagnosen, an denen sich die Ärzte und Therapeuten festhalten, finde ich sehr übertrieben. Man geht zum Arzt, nach 10 min Gespräch kommt dann ‘ne Diagnose, und daran wird festgehalten […]”

#dr. mehrgardt #kritik an Psychotherapie #verletzungen #grenzüberschreitungen #selbsthilfe #selbstfürsorge #emanzipation #distanz #psychiatrie