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spacebarbarianweird · 6 months

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The Scorching Sun

My desperate attempt to redeem the ending scene

Astarion is running away from the sunlight once the tadpole is gone, and Tav is nowhere to be seen.

Tags: hurt/comfort

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The excruciating pain pierces Astarion as his skin starts burning.

The sun's searing rays cause agony from which there is no respite. The tadpole's grip finally releases him. Still, as it does, it leaves behind a gaping void, one filled with a mind that races with panic and anxiety, amplifying the horrors that lie ahead.

Astarion is scared. He has never felt so frightened in his life. Not when he awoke in his coffin two centuries ago, dying of hunger and pain. Not when Cazador put him through horrors and torments. Not when he was sealed in the tomb for an entire year. Not when he thought Tav was dying.

Because now he is burning alive.

Astarion desperately looks at his companions seeking support, but instead, he sees disgust on their faces as if without tadpoles they suddenly realize Astarion is a vampire.

He hears a chuckle, probably from Gale, that "Now our friend has to return to shadows" and another voice, "Seems like we won't see him again soon."

Once trusted friends now cruelly mock him, their laughter an eerie cacophony that reverberates in the depths of Astarion's consciousness. Each word stabs his undead heart.

You are nowhere to be seen. You are absent when he needs you the most.

Astarion runs toward the huge crates at the pier, which cast a comforting shadow. Astarion stumbles – he can't see anything; the sun has burnt his eyes. By touch, he finally gets to the shadows, curls up in the corner, and presses his legs to the chest.

Eyesight finally recovers. Astarion hears distant voices – someone laughs, someone cheers. He is jealous. Why can't he be there, with them, in the sunlight? Didn't he suffer too much? Didn't he fight the Brain with the rest? Why, why?

Tears stream down his cheeks. Tears of pain, tears of desperation, resentment, injustice.

Betrayal.

As the sun slowly rises, a merciful shadow retreats, and a harsh ray of light burns Astarion's right leg. The once-safe haven has become dangerous, and despair compels Astarion to seek refuge in the nearest house. The sun continues to scorch him, subjecting him to wave after wave of searing pain.

However, an invisible barrier obstructs his path, granting entry only upon invitation, offering no respite for the vampire. Astarion is left to writhe in the agony of the daylight.

He must go to the Inn. The vampire's invitation is forever, but the city lies in ruins, with only fleeting shadows left. Baldurians cheer, praising the gods for saving them from unimaginable horrors. Amidst the joy and light, Astarion feels like crying, for he knows he doesn't belong here. Life, light, and happiness are not for him; he remains a creature of the night, a monster. His foolish hope for anything else has faded away.

At last, he reaches the Inn. Astarion pushes the door open and collapses on his knees, palms pressed into the wooden floor. The pain clings to his body like acid sweat. The tavern is empty, and Astarion manages to stumble upstairs, each step feeling like an eternity. Even the cruelest tortures in Cazador's mansion did not leave him feeling so helpless and weak.

Finally, he crawls into the room he once shared with you and collapses onto the bed. The dark room envelops Astarion like a lover, providing a shred of safety. The echoes of his former companions' laughter still torment the vampire like cruel ghosts from the past.

In desperation, Astarion questions if he heard your voice. Were your promises of love empty words? Could you no longer want him, and the tadpole was the sole reason for your affection? These tormenting thoughts whirl in his mind, threatening to drown him as hunger and pain draw him closer to the abyss.

The hunger is insatiable, gut-wrenching. The tadpole had once dulled it like a medicine. Now, it is back, threatening to turn Astarion into a feral, mindless monster.

Astarion clenches his fingers, trying to grasp the reality: he is alive, his master is dead, and he is free. But it all means nothing.

Hours pass, and Astarion attempts to enter a trance to escape the agony, but his sunburnt body refuses to cooperate. He longs for respite, for a brief escape from reality, but the pain and dark thoughts overwhelm him.

Yes, he did hear your voice in that laughter, and he envisions an evil grin on your face. Perhaps you despise him and have moved on to someone else. Silent tears stream down his face, bearing witness to the profound betrayal he feels from those he once trusted and loved and to the unending nightmare of his existence.

Then, he hears footsteps. The door swings open.

"Astarion! I should have known you were heading here," you exclaim as you sit on the bed and take his hand.

Astarion looks at you in disbelief. Your face, your voice, your scent. You are back. He wants to grab you, to press his face against your collarbone. But he is so weak he can't move.

"Does it hurt?" you ask. Astarion nods, and you press your lips to his knuckles.

"I'm so sorry. I fainted when the tadpole was removed. When I woke up, they told me you had run away, and I've been trying to find you ever since. Hey, look at me," you gently caress his cheek. "I am here. I'm not going anywhere."

Astarion finally manages to look into your eyes. He sees the same love, care, kind smile, hope, and support he thought he had lost.

"I thought… I thought you were never coming back," he whispers.

"Well, if you had run even further, I would have lost you forever," you say.

The tears prickle his eyes once again. How could he have ever doubted you? What kind of person was he to assume that his lover would betray him?

"You didn't answer if it hurts."

"Like a hellplane," he replies.

"I am so sorry. I truly am."

Astarion finally manages to lift his hands and he presses you against his chest. You roll over and lie beside him, putting your head on his shoulder, and he wraps his right hand around you as you place your hand on his stomach.

There are so many things he wants to say to you but simply can't.

"What are we going to do next?" you ask.

He shrugs. "I don't know. What do you want?"

"Anything that doesn't involve staying in this city. We could settle somewhere…"

"It would be tediously boring," Astarion interjects.

"Agreed. We'll always have time for that. Maybe we should go to the Underdark to help other spawns."

He strokes your hair. "I'm not taking a living person to a den of seven thousand vampires, that's for sure."

Astarion presses you tighter, wanting to feel your heartbeat. Then, a realization washes over him: he is no longer in pain. His skin doesn't burn, and his muscles aren't being torn apart. Your presence alone alleviates his suffering. He kisses your forehead and responds with a smile.

"What do you think about getting away? Traveling with me and seeing the world?" you finally propose.

"Darling, I thought you'd never suggest it. I'm sick of this place."

"And we can find a cure for you. There are probably ways to allow you to walk in the sun or even reverse your vampirism. This world is full of cruel wonders, so why not give it a try?"

He nods and gazes at your face as if trying to memorize every little detail.

"I'm not going anywhere, Astarion," you smile. "Stop looking at me as if I'm going to disappear." You sit up and ask, "Can I kiss you?"

"Only if you promise me something," Astarion counters.

"What is it?"

"Stop asking for permission to touch or kiss me."

"You sure?" you hesitate.

"Yes. Stop treating me as if I'm made of glass. It's you. Your touches can never be unwelcome."

You giggle and kiss him. At that moment, you are the two happiest people in the world.

You both lay in each other's arms until sunset. When night falls, you leave the city walls and enter the wilderness. You continue forward, holding hands as if afraid to lose each other. Astarion's undead heart rejoices. He has everything a man needs.

Freedom.

A woman he loves, who loves him in return.

A future.

He would be a fool to exchange all this for false promises of power.

Suddenly, you stop, wrap your hands around his neck, and press your lips against his. Then, you proceed to kiss his cheeks, his forehead, and everything you can reach while standing on the ground.

He flinches for a second but then hugs you back and tightens his grip.

"Never ask for permission," he whispers into your ear. "You are always invited."

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beesxrated · 2 months

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Invisible Lover

Ascended Astarion x Tav. 🪻

First person female Tav.

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The party seems to be going perfectly, just like always. We haven't hosted many, but Astarion has been enjoying every one. He's been busy lately trying to make connections in the city to be able to throw extravagant parties. It's been pretty easy, as everyone in Baldur's Gate knows the two of us as heros of the city.

People are dancing, I'm greeting more as they come in, Astarion is talking with a group of rich business men. Everyone takes in the decoration, tomorrow is the beginning of winter, so I have decorated accordingly. Blue and silver everywhere. Astarion let me go all out, since it's the last party of the year and my birthday is a tenday away. I got someone to make silver snowflake pottery for the tables. I used any scrap paper I could find and made snowflakes that now hang from the ceiling. I bought a dress with a deep blue skirt with small star like glitter, the bodes is black paired with a light grey under shirt. For Astarion I bought him a black jacket embroidered with silver moons, his pants matching.

Once the flow of people stops I step away and to the table of food, grabbing a small tart and glass of wine for myself. I scan the room, unable to find Astarion. A new friend, Callista Archambeau, thej wife of one of the richest men in the city, finds me, however. She leads me to a small table away from the crowd of people.

"You have outdone yourself, this time." She laughs taking in the decor I picked out, "What made you pick this theme?”

"Blue is my favorite color, but it's almost winter and I don't expect to be throwing anymore parties this year." I respond.

She nods seeming to agree with my choice. We hear someone call for her and she quickly says goodbye and excuses herself. I sit in silence, sipping a glass of wine watching everyone mingle and talk, still unable to find Astarion.

Suddenly, I feel someone grab me and drag me into a little corner. I know this place, I’d been here several times, it's one of Astarion's favorite places to have me during parties. It's not really a corner, it's three columns almost touching, the biggest opening facing away from the party, but a place the guests have access to. Astarion has recently had a bench seat put in to block the columns’ side of the space. I turn to find him giving me a cunning smirk.

I don't have time to say anything before he’s kissing me. He bites my neck, not hard enough to draw blood, just a nip. He kisses me again. He, quickly, turns the two of us around and sits while kissing me, pulling me onto his lap. This time he fully bites my neck, not drinking, just plunging his teeth in for fun.

We hear footsteps coming and I immediately turn away from him. He pulls me back onto his lap and whispers, "Invisibilis", before continuing to kiss my neck.

Callista comes around the corner and smiles at me, "Found you!" She sits next to us on the bench, "I haven't seen Mr. Ancunin, where is he?”

"Probably busy," I say, struggling to keep still, "showing off." He bites me hard at that comment.

"They love doing that, don't they." She laughs, not a cute giggle, a rough sort of chortle.

Astarion bites me again and starts to roll up the back bit of my dress, slowly. Just as he does, Sir Archambeau enters the doorway. I go to stand to shake his hand as a sign of respect, but waves me away. As I sit again, I feel Astarion push into me. I feel my face flush realizing what he's done, thankfully the dimness has saved me from explaining anything.

I hear him whisper the invisibility spell again as he grips my hips, slowly moving me back and forth. I feel his breath on my neck become hot and heavy, doing his best to keep quiet as I do the same.

"Have you seen Ancunin? I had a proposition to make him." Ballard Archambeau asks.

I smile as best as I can, "I'm not sure. I lost him a while ago.”

Astarion grips your hips tighter, I assume trying to tell me to direct them somewhere else, "I saw him by the table earlier. Let's go out and look around, it's a big place, we will find him sometime." Callista says, convincing her husband to leave.

Once the both of them leave Astarion pushes me over. I brace myself on the column in front of us as he continues to thrust. One hand holds my waist in place and the other grips the roots of my hair, pulling my head back. I do my best not to make a noise.

He pulls out and spins me around to kiss me. My back is pressed against the column I was just bracing against, while he places hot kisses down my body. I let out a soft moan as he grabs my neck with his right hand and again raises my skirt with his left hand.

"Just listen to them out there." Astarion groans, toying with me, "Having all that fun, not knowing what I'm doing to you back here.”

I groan as he pushes his fingers into me. I hear footsteps and Astarion takes his hand off my throat and puts it on my mouth. I bite his palm and he glares at at me. In response he grabs my neck again, turning my head and plunging his teeth into my neck, drinking just a bit of blood. I feel the blood flow through my veins, it feels cold and thick.

I grind my hips against his hand as he finishes his blood snack. He tilts his head offering me his neck as well. I lean forward and sink my teeth into his porcelain skin. I taste the thick sweetness his blood has. I don't know if it's from fulfilling the ritual or if his blood has always tasted this way, but it's like a dessert.

Astarion has to push me off of him, "Cheeky." He says lowly, keeping his hand on my throat.

I let him do as he wants to me, it's the least I could do for possibly almost killing him. He kneels in front of me, pulling my skirt over himself. He takes a moment to adjust, still working with his hand. He throws one of my legs over his shoulder before pushing his tongue into me. I lean my head back and try to grip his curls through the dress.

Before I can readjust or stifle the latest groan, Callista bursts through again, she has seem to be a constant in our life the last hour or so. I feel Astarion slowly move to hide himself more under my dress and slip through the space between columns just behind me.

"Still no luck finding your husband." She says, "Are you okay though? You look flushed.”

"He's not really, my..." I trail off, no one really knows your relationship, not even me, "Yes, I'm alright, sometimes parties just take it out of me." I respond.

She smiles, "Well after saving the world you think you'd be able to relax more.”

Astarion arrives quickly behind her, "I heard someone was looking for me?”

"You are a hard one to find Mr. Ancunin.”

Lady Archambeau grins and loops her arm in his leading him to her husband. I take a breath, glad she didn't notice the red blood dripping down my chin. I quickly wipe it away, making sure it's all gone before rejoining the party. Astarion is busy listening to Ballard's proposal. He actually looks interested in this one, it's rare he accepts any. Realizing this is a rare occasion I join them.

"Just think about it, will you. We need people like you." He says.

Astarion nods, "I will." I give him a look as if to say what is it, to which he shakes his head slightly, he will tell me later.

I pat his chest softly, "I'm going to head up to bed, this crowd is giving me a headache.”

"It's almost over, I'll say our goodbyes and join you, okay, darling?" He says. I nod in response.

I climb the stairs to my room, the two of us used to share a room, but with him staying up every night it's become mostly mine. I don't really sleep either, but I like to use the time to read quietly and write letters to all our old friends. Karlach and Wyll's stay secure in a small box in the nightstand since I can't actively send them. Gale is the only one who sends anything back regularly, he's also the only one I see occasionally.

I lay on the unmade bed grabbing a book Gale sent us not too long ago, another perk of having a professor friend. I send him books I find he might like, which most he probably already has, but he doesn't tell me that. He sends us adventure books, romance sometimes too. This one he kept from our time together against the Absolute, A Pleasurable Deal. I wonder why he sent it, it's a very lewd book, but I enjoy it nonetheless.

A little while later, Astarion joins me, "Oh, a sex book, I love those.”

"Well I had to fill my time until you came back up." I laugh, "I couldn't stand there with you, I'd just be picturing what I'd want you to do to me.”

"Oh," he starts to kiss my neck and unlace my corset, "and what's that?”

I hum as his lips and tongue trace the scares in my neck and shoulder, "I want this, slow, soft touches. I want to slowly take everything off, kissing every inch of unveiled skin as we go. I want to enjoy every caress.”

He grins against my shoulder, taking in everything I said. He pulls the laces out of my corset in one tug, "Okay, beautiful. I think I can manage that.”

I turn around to face him. Kissing his lips and brushing my finger along the outside of his ear. He shudders and closes his eyes for a moment. When he opens them he smiles and does the same to me. He kisses my nose, ear, cheek, neck, collar bone.

"I love you." Astarion says very softly, I almost didn't hear it.

I peck his lips, "I love you.”

He kisses my shoulder, pulling my sleeve down and trying kisses as far down as he could. He moves himself over me and does the same to the other shoulder. He nudges me, asking me to pull my arms completely out of the fabric and as I do he kisses every inch of skin he can, relishing in its softness. His lips trail over to my chest, kissing the space between my breasts and moving the collar just a bit more downward.

I enjoy every touch and every kiss as he pulls the corset off of me. He slowly pulls my blouse over my head and admires my body, his body. He kisses my breasts, my sides, and my stomach to the hem of my skirt. He stares up at me as he sensually pulls down the cloth, brushing his lips on my skin, and leaving butterfly kisses on my stomach.

He pulls my skirt completely off and kisses my calves and up to my hips. Astarion places the last kiss on the center of my hip. His kisses start back up again before he nips my ear. This time I flip him over, starting with his lips, ears, cheek and neck just the same as he did to me. I pull off his shirt kissing every inch of skin, nipping his hips just a bit. He jolts a bit, not expecting that. I push his pants off and kiss all the way from his calf back up to his lips.

"Now what did you picture?" He asks, still under me.

I think for a moment, "I don't know. I just want to enjoy it, and I want it to be slow.”

He smiles before pushing me back over again. He doesn't lay on top of me, instead he starts kissing my shoulder again. Astarion let's his hand slowly drift down between my legs. He kisses my neck and I grip his hand as he dips his fingers into me. I moan when he finds the right spot, arching my back. I turn to face him, taking him in my hand. Both of us enjoy the feeling of the other, taking our time in making it perfect.

Slowly he eased himself over me and I guide him in. And for some reason it feels better than any other time we've had sex. There's a sort of pressure and intimacy to it I'd never felt before. There's more closeness than any other time, he's fully on me leaning down to kiss me on his elbows. It feels like we are one body instead of two just seeking companionship. I feel every emotion, every trust seems to relieve some stress. He groans in my ear, a different tone than any he'd previously had. It's as if he's actually, finally, enjoying me, for me.

Astarion bites my bottom lip as he lets out his last thrust. I taste blood in my mouth and feel him jolting inside me. He doesn't seem as out of breath as he usually does. His eyes are still closed as he slowly pulls out of me, shuddering. He plants a heavy kiss on my lips and collapses next to me.

I turn to him again and twirl some of the silver curls in your finger, "Are you okay, Star?”

"Yes " he sighs, his eyes still closed, "I just... Feel everything.”

I furrow your brow, "What do you mean?”

"I like it but I have no idea what it is.”

“Can you describe it at all?”

"Like something small, tingly in my stomach. My head feels fuzzy like I can't think properly and I just want to hold you.”

"Those are butterflies." I smile tugging lightly at his hair.

"I don't want them there." He laughs, "I love you.”

"I love you.”