#and it relieves a lot of the pressure i feel bc holy hell its like my head is a fuckn balloon or smthn

[batz]

had a Weird Day today! im ok tho

#tmrw im going to the beach so im:) yeah:) #little bit of positive vibes thank god #had my blood taken today as Well so im extra overwhelmed so im. gonna clean my room n then smoke n then Feel Better Now #gonna relax and draw and watch cartoons i deserve a Break after All That. holy shit. #at least weed helps w this. idk if its the cbd or smthn but like when i smoke it legit feels like my skull is opening up #and it relieves a lot of the pressure i feel bc holy hell its like my head is a fuckn balloon or smthn #terrible ! #also this seth rogen brand weed smells REALLY good its kinda fucked up . whenever a celebrity makes something i expect it to suck so idk LOL #weed m #frank.txt

[anxiousgaypanicking]

okay so i recently watched the metal family (the english dub) on youtube and i sent my friend a ton of information on it - my thoughts, my theories, etc, and then i thought of a sanders sides related universe for it 

technically some things differ, as in the part i wrote glam and chive (who ive assigned to logan and remus) eventually end up together, but whatever 

and, because im a whore for attention im going to post here exactly what i rambled about because i was spilling out thoughts that just made my heart beat faster. so basically, the metal family: sanders sides edition 

spoilers for the metal family. 

basically i was thinking of logan and remus basically as these two characters, with logan as glam/sebastian and remus as chive, and logans parents putting a lot of pressure on him as their only child, and his dad is suffering abuse to so he cant even stick up for logan, and when he does bad he has to put out his arm and roll his sleeve up and his moms hits it repeatedly, and in the show glam doesnt react until he showers bc thats when it stings (until a certain scene where glams dad slaps it so hard he fucking bleeds a lot and starts sobbing and its like part of when he snapped) but thats probably what he does, and obviously the butler also gets mad and snaps on him a lot too, but when he goes to that music exam and gets second place to remus (who he met briefly on the way to the music exam - youll understand this more if you end up watching the series), hes shocked, and as remus walks him home he explains what he did on the guitar, and gives him the bach vinyl and logan squints but takes it anyway, and when he announces he got second he gets scolded, they mock him for who he lost too, and the back vinyl is taken by his mother, hes scolded for thinking he could ever be on par (logan plays the violen btw - he entered the music exam with a violen and its what his mouther abuses him for when he plays wrong or doesnt answer right/right away to note related questions) with bach, and then hes hit with the ruler and sent back to his room, where he plays the bach vinyl thinking it will be bach but then its metal and it sort of awakens something in logan and he sort of snaps

when he runs into remus again remus offers to teach him, steals an amp and guitar from the observatory, and then when he goes home then this is where hes hit until his forearm is literally dripping with blood and hes sobbing, but sort of that unhinged sort of sobbing where hes like :) while sobbing and bleeding, and his mom is saying hes no longer allowed to take walks because he was late, went through the park, ran in a suit, etc, and how logan will be studying with her daily from now on, and through gritted teeth, a sob, and a smile, as he clutches his bloody wrist hes like "yes mother, ill study under you every day. every day. every day." and he and remus had luckily agreed already to meet by the dumpster at midnight, and thats what they start doing

remus teaches him how to play, and logan literally gets no fucking sleep and becomes more and more sleep deprived as hes taught more and more and it makes him more and more manic and unhinged, and he has periods where he fucking snaps and can play the bass super well because hes fueling his anger and his trauma into how aggressively he plays and is actually super good, and eventually he and remus get a gig with these two other bandmates 

and that happens to be the day that the way he hides his diary (where he gets out his murderous thoughts over his father, writes about lying to him, and writes down notes for music he wants to make) and his model of the city (which hed spent a lot of time on and cared about a lot and made out of every day things like lightbulbs and pencil shavers and had to keep hidden) were revealed and his mother found them, and she threw it into the trash where logan saw it crumbled as he walked home in the rain, and while his mother is aggressively shouting at him she says something along the lines of "who are you going to choose. your family, or some vagrants!?" and logan sort of snaps, goes wide eyed, and walks the other way, despite the fact its rianing and his mother demands him to come back, and then starst screaming about how if he ever comes back to the door hell never be allowed back inside, and thats where that episode ends

and basically i was thinking that logan leaves, and sort of walks around in his suit with his violen for a while, before he goes back to the alley where he hides his guitar that remus stole for him and his punk clothes, and he grabs them both and sort of mindlessly wanders until he ends up back in front of remuss trailer

when logan shows up remus doesnt realize until he opens the door of his trailer and prepares to leave and logans just standing there staring, utterly soaked, and he craves his neck up when remus walks out and remus is like "holy shit dude, you scared me. its not even midnight here. how long have you been here?" and logan doesnt answer, and hess not used to tocuhing people or being touched gently, but he sort of falls into remus, and collapses against him, and he starts sobbing because he just lost his family, and he left his dad all alone, but ehs finally free from the abuse, and hes so tired and so confused and hes never felt so unsure of his next move but remus just pulls him inside, brings his stuff inside, they step over his sleeping and drunk parent, and remus takes logan to his room (possibly the one he shares with roman ?) and basically just hugs logan as he sobs and cries and eventually passes out against him because hes literally so fucking sleep deprived, and remus takes liberty to change logan out of his sopping wet clothes, but then both of logans arms are covered in scars, some of them still scabbed, and remus is immediately concerned but he decides hell ask about it when logan wakes up, and basically ust goes out and shoplifts some food or steals from his parent to buy shit, and when logan wakes up hes given low quality food that he accepts gratefully, apologizes for showing up unceremoniously and being so informal, but remus just hesitantly wraps an arm around him, and logan accepts it, and remus says its fine while cuddling with him and then again hesitantly asks what happened

and logan sort of goes silent and doesnt talk about it, but clears his throat and asks if its okay he stays here, and theres already three people living in this trailer so he feels bad for asking, but remus just pulls him closer and is like "yeah man! of course you can stay!" because obviously hes not going to tell logan no after what he just pulled, so he lets logan stay, and remus and roman bicker for it a bit when logan uses their small ass bathroom to shower, and by the end remus has basically bribed roman into going along with it

and logan has to adjust to not being a wealthy - althought not spoiled - person anymore, and sometimes he reacts to things on instinct. he breaks something and remus comes up behind him and asks what happened and logan just sort of stares straight ahead, rolls up his sleeve, and sticks out his arm, and remus is like  logan?? and it takes logan a few seconds to snap out of it and he sort of gazes at remus, goes wide eyed, and then apologizes as he brings his arm back in and rolls down his sleeve, and he seems really awkward but also quite relieved, and remus has never hurt him before, but it was just sort of that reactive thing, and that happens to be the day where remus decides to ask what those scars are, and asks to finally treat them properly because he hears logans whimpers and hisses in the shower

he and roman have their fair share of scars from their own shitty drunk parent, so they know pretty damn well how to take care of them, and how to steal bandages and shit, so remus helps clean them out and up while logan sort of quietly tells remus all about his life, why the music exam was such a big deal, and how remus basically changed his life, and how hes still confused and doesnt know if he made the right decision, and remus doesnt respond until the end where he bandages up logans arms and then gently grabs his hand and tells logan that hes safe now, and that being surronded by people who only put you down and more so hurt you isnt good, and that he believes logan made the right decision because hes safe here with them (the twins make sure to keep him guarded from the drunk parent) and roman seconds that from his spot on the bed, and so logan tries to put his past behind him and instead focus on playing music with remus, and playing shows at bars and stuff where they slowly gain a larger and larger fan base, and they make more and more money from the awesome music they play, and eventually use that money to buy their own house

i know its a lot, but just imagine. imagine

#tw abuse #cw abuse #tw blood #cw blood #cw alcohol #tw alcohol #basically a big tw #sanders sides au #sanders sides #intrulogical #sanders sides angst #potential roceit #roceit #metal family #the metal family #mfssau #i know its a lot #but im so hyped #might write something with this

[sicklylittlesnowflake]

How about a fic where Peter gets a concussion while playing basketball and starts like puking and tony has to come get him bc idk parent tony au xD

(Hey beautiful friend, here’s your not so beautiful fic, for a beautiful person who deserves a better fic but tbh this is all I can produce!! Anyway, so here’s a short little fic starring parent Tony bc that’s some good shit yo)

Peter had never liked sport.

He hated how his chest felt like it was on fire when he ran, how the world seemed horribly heightened and horrifying. He felt out of control, and felt as if the world was tipping out of balance as he’d become painfully aware of his existence.

Peter would dread gym, often purposely leaving his gear or trying to find jobs to do around the school. He’d seek out the nice little old receptionist lady or the janitors or workmen to see if they needed help, just to get out of gym. Peter had gone as far as to fake injuries in the past, to a successful degree. Middle school drama had served its purpose, and Peter was thankful for it.

In fairness, ever since the radioactive spider incident, exercising wasn’t quite as agonising as it used to. His bones wouldn’t screech at him and his lungs wouldn’t be begging for air as he ran, or how exhausted and heavy he felt after a basketball game. Having a new spider body was pretty good, and he could do sit ups without struggling and failing to get up, his core aching and like it was being weighed down by a rockslide worth of stones.

But something Peter would never ever get used to was the pressure of competitiveness.

It only seemed to get worse.

Peter hated how the world seemed to be teetering on his shoulders, appearing to threaten to topple over at any second. He had one body, and he couldn’t do it, and he certainly couldn’t do it with glaring eyes and monstrous voices yelling at him. He hated there angry voices echoing in his head, pushing how he wasn’t good enough, how bad he was. This hyper awareness he’d get was too much, his hands wouldn’t feel like his hands and his legs would feel wrong. He felt like he didn’t belong in his own body, and the anxiety rendered him functionless.

It was a hundred times worse with the spidey senses. The heightened senses that came with the whole Spiderman ordeal proved to be useful for the most part, allowing him to fight baddies to a better standard but came at the cost of heightened anxiety and illness. Everything was too much, so much that the world would spin and that he’d feel horribly woozy and just want to drop down on the floor and cry.

Peter didn’t really know how, but despite his utter detestation of sport and physical education, he ended up going that fateful Thursday.

He wasn’t quite sure what had happened, if he genuinely felt bad for missing that many classes at a time and felt like he should turn up because otherwise he’d feel wrong, or some holy light shone upon him that morning and flicked a switch and made him go, “You know what? Screw it, I’m going! What’s the worst that could happen?”

A lot could happen, and Peter wished he didn’t make that dumb decision. But this was him, he was Peter Parker and this was his life, so of course it happened. It was written in the stars.

Peter let out a tiny squeaking noise as the basketball flew right by his face, narrowly missing the margin between Hannah and his face.

“Dammit Peter!” He heard one of his teammates yell out frustratedly.

“Cop on!” The same person hiss angrily.

“Sorry!” Peter yelped squeakily, awkwardly trying to run after the ball.

The ball seemed to be flying around like some kind of golden snitch from Harry Potter, unbelievably swift and hard to catch with the human eye. It was a horrendous experience, like when the movie seemed to be fast forwarding ahead of him, way beyond his own pace as he frantically tried to find the buttons on the damn remote and stop as it reeled on and on, further away from his reach. Except now he couldn’t even find the damn remote, he had no control of himself.

Peter didn’t even know how much time had past when he was being scolded again.

“Dammit Parker, wake the fuck up, will you?!”

“I’m sorry–” Peter had tried to say, and suddenly the air around him seemed to drop into the negatives as it froze. It chilled his bones, goosebumps emerging as the hair on his arms stood up. His eyesight seemed to focus in, hearing increasing and everything seemed to slow into this agonisingly slow pace, as what was once a horrifying warped world fastforwarding into light speed turned into a never ending slow motion.

Then the impact.

The disastrous and pain inducing collision of his head and the basketball, the sickening thwack of the velocity of its contact. The concerned and mortified screaming of Ned, the ringing in his ears. And finally the lightness of his body as it free falls and thuds against the cold wooden floor.

“Parker!” The coach yelled in shock.

“Flash, what the fuck?!” Michelle yelled out from the sidelines, running towards them.

“I didn’t mean to!” Flash gasped defensively, eyes widening.

“Sure thing, Barry Allen! You just killed a dude!” She shot back aggressively.

“What?! Oh no, Peter!” Ned whimpered, tears beginning to prick at his eyes.

“Oh, fuck, sorry, no, Ned. He’s not dead, probably a concussion,” Michelle apologises, beginning to crouch down to examine Peter’s limp body.

“I swear I didn’t mean to coach,” Flash said worriedly to their teacher, who was currently in the middle of scratching his head in confusion.

“Yeah, so you just happened to aim the basketball towards his head by accident, and now you’ve killed my best friend!” Ned accused tearfully.

“Shh, Ned, he’s not dead,” Michelle reassured as she proceeded to check for a pulse.

“I just wanted to wake him up!” Flash protested, growing to be genuinely concerned and guilty.

“Smart move, jackass, now he’s more asleep than ever,” Michelle taunted, then proceeded to avert her attention back to Peter.

“Peter? You hear me?” Michelle tried in vain, hoping she’d get to him somehow.

No response.

She sighed deeply, “Yup. He’s out cold.”

“…uh…so, what should we do?” The coach asked quietly, lost.

“Huh? What should we do? Dude, you’re the coach, aren’t you supposed to know what to do?!” Flash exclaimed, a little taken aback.

Michelle rolled her eyes, “This is our school, did you expect much?”

Flash shut his mouth.

“We’ve got to get him to the Nurses, just to make sure there’s nothing serious going on,” Ned suggested.

“Good idea Ned,” Michelle stressed, shooting daggers in the direction of the coach.

“Here, I’ll lift him–” One of the jocks offered, crouching down to lift him when Peter stirred.

His body convulsed for a brief moment, beginning to awaken from its short slumber. Ned gasped in alarm and got to his knees to level with him.

“Peter?! Peter, my dude, are you okay?!” Ned asked worriedly.

Peter opened his eyes and gagged immediately as a sudden wave of intense nausea hit him hard, causing his stomach to whirl and churn uncomfortably. He pressed his hands against his stomach to try and calm it to the best of his ability, biting his lip to try and withstand the intense pain pounding harshly at his head.

“Peter?”

“Whhhuhhhh….?” Peter slurred.

“Do you know who I am?” Ned asked cautiously and slowly.

“Ned,” Peter slurred, squinting and struggling to keep his eyes open as he began to see double.

Ned managed a shaky, relieved smile at that.

“Do you know where you are?”

Peter squinted, trying to look around but every little movement he made caused the world to rapidly spin like it was a spinning top. Which in turn caused another wave of dizziness and nausea. A state of panic and confusion as he couldn’t quite make out where he was.

“H-hang on, I need to stand up t-to see w-where I a-am,” Peter tried, lifting himself off the ground with his hands.

“Wait, no, Peter, slow–”

Peter leaped up onto his feet, only for the world to double, quadruple and go around in circles on a confusing and nightmarish hell of a merry go round.

“Woah,” Peter choked as he felt the dizziness and wooziness get to him, incredibly shaky and unstable, trying to keep his feet firmly planted on the ground only to find all the forces all joining together in a joined attempt to uproot him.

It didn’t take much to do so.

Because the world tilted rapidly and the floor rose and ripped him with it, and he was falling again, but this time before he could fall there was a pair of strong arms catching him by the waist and dangling him over.

Ned’s arms were firm, holding him steady, far away from the ground. He wasn’t going to fall. But Ned was a little too firm, holding him on the stomach just a little on the wrong side. Whatever it was, it was just enough to push him over the edge.

Peter pushed off him frantically, hunching over as his stomach contracted and cramped painfully and then the contents were pushing up his throat horribly, scorching it on its way up. Then he expelled onto the floor, heaving and gasping for air as his muscles clenched and retracted as he vomited.

“Oh, gross!” Peter could hear someone gasp in the background, causing him to heat up and go red with embarrassment and shame.

When he finally finished, Peter felt so exhausted and weak and drained he couldn’t help but drop to his knees. He shook violently from how ill he felt, and the dull ringing at the back of his head was a bit too much and the panic and shame was too much he started to cry.

Ned frowned, approaching Peter gently, after saying, “Go call Tony.”

Peter cried for the next while, feeling so ashamed and embarrassed and full of self loathing, but Ned remained by his side the whole time.

Peter couldn’t quite stop crying, and cried through being gently escorted by Ned to the Nurses office.

He kept crying as he was escorted onto a bed, and kept crying as he laid his weakened body down and cried into the white sheets.

He felt horribly embarrassed, unwell and ashamed. Peter wished that he just decided to help old Hilda instead, and wondered why the hell this always happened to him. He wondered if there was some cure to this odd unfortunate occurrences curse he seemed to acquire from his parents. If there was, he better be hooked up fast because he wasn’t quite sure if he could deal with this any more.

But the moment Tony walked through the doors of the nurses, his soft kind voice calling his name out like a lullaby, everything felt a little bit better.

Tony had this magic about him that filled him with fatherly reassurance. An anchor that kept him steady even during the strongest of currents.

“Hey buddy, how’re you doing,” Tony asked warmly, his approach gentle and soft. He pulled a chair over and sat down, looking at him with such kindness that made Peter forget about how ashamed he had just been moments ago.

“Awful,” Peter whimpered, tears beginning to spill from his eyes yet again.

“Awh, I’m sorry kiddo, hey, c'mere,” Tony cooed softly, opening up his arms and taking Peter in into a loving and comforting embrace.

Peter melted into the embrace and cried softly, shaking, but still steadied by the strong embrace. He felt a little more okay just then.

“I’m so embarrassed and ashamed..”

“Of what? There is nothing to be ashamed of when you’re you. You are the most remarkable kid I’ve ever met, and I’m Tony Frickin’ Stark, I’ve met plenty of remarkable kids. So..That’s real saying something. There is nothing to be ashamed about.”

Peter couldn’t help the soft smile that laced his features.

“You’re going to be just fine, kiddo. We can go home and watch Rick and Morty, how’s that sound?” Tony offered, a warm smile playing on his face.

“The ‘home’ part is enough.” Peter chuckled shakily.

“Then I will deliver,” Tony promised, slinging an arm around his son’s shoulder as they commenced their journey home.

“I know, you always do.”

#peter parker #tony stark #iron man #spiderman homecoming #spiderman #ned leeds #michelle jones #flash thompson #dad tony stark #marvel #mcu #whump #sickfic #tw emeto #tom holland spiderman #prompts