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ms-demeanor · 10 months

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Due to some stuff brought up in recent posts I believe it is time to once again extol the virtues of Ms-Demeanor's Patented Where Did I Put That Fucking Paper Organizational Binder.

Hello! I am a disorganized adult! This is the system by which I manage my important shit like pink slips for my car and medical records and tax information.

You're going to need:

A 3-Ring Binder

Transparent Sheet Protectors

Notebook dividers (optional but VERY useful)

A backpack (optional)

So the way this system works is you put the sheet protectors into the binder. You can either use the dividers to divide the binder into sections or you can label some of the sheet protectors to make different sections but what you are generally going to do is make sections of the binder labeled things like "taxes" or "vet" or "doctor" and put a few sheet protectors in each section.

Then all of your papers with important information get crammed in that folder. You don't organize them, you don't sort them by date, you don't alphabetize. You put things vaguely relating to taxes into the sheet protectors in the taxes section. You put things relating to cars in the cars section. You don't even attempt to make this readable - you're not using sheet protectors so that you can read each page and keep it legible, you're using sheet protectors because it's a cheap plastic bag that will sit nicely in a binder.

You CAN put stuff into the individual sheet protectors when you get it, but let's be realistic you probably WON'T do that, so just tuck individual papers into the front of the binder until you get to a critical mass of paperwork then take an hour to sit down and sort into categories and put it in the binder once every six months to three years (depending on how frequently you get paperwork). Sometimes these sections will outgrow their original allotted space - since my spouse had a transplant surgery the medical section has had to become its own folder - and that's okay. If you end up with multiple folders just keep them together (this is why the backpack is an option, and one I strongly recommend).

Because yeah, if my organization system relies on opening up a drawer and putting something where it belongs as soon as I get the paper, I will simply not be organized. It's not going to happen. But I can handle a messy stack of paper that sits in one place and grows until it is time to shove it into a binder. I can't organize things for thirty seconds a day every day but I can organize things for an hour once every year or so (maybe two hours every five years when I sort out stuff I don't need like copies of warranties for parts on a car I don't own anymore).

When my mom died she had about fifty pounds of paper files in her office that were neatly organized in a system that didn't make any sense to my dad, my sister, and I. I ended up sorting through those files for twenty hours, tossing out copies of paid invoices from ten years ago and student handbooks from my junior high school. I reduced one filing cabinet, two desk file drawers, and a foot-high stack to a six inch binder that I gave to my dad. My mom died five years ago; two months ago my dad asked me about a medical document and I was able to tell him to go look for it in the medical section of the binder. It was there, because ALL IMPORTANT SHIT GOES IN THE BINDER.

Where is my birth certificate? In the binder. Where is my tax return from 2017? In the binder. Where is the record of my dog's last rabies shot? In the binder. Where are the records for my life insurance? In the binder.

A lot of what people consider "being organized" breaks down to whether or not you can find the specific things that you're looking for. Does my binder look nice? Is it aesthetic? Does it have color-coded tabs and papers all laid out neatly? Absolutely fucking not. But if you ask me where to find a paper I know that I can do so within about five minutes of shuffling through the pile of letter-folded sheets that I pulled out of the appropriate section of the binder.

I've discussed the Where Did I Put that Fucking Paper Binder before, but now it is time to expand that concept to the Backpack of Important Shit.

You likely have Important Shit that does not fit in a binder. Some of my Important Shit that does not fit in a binder is stuff like jewelry and the spare key for my car. Other stuff - the reason I decided to bring this up at all - includes my backup hard drive and packaging (including product key codes) for pretty much all of the software that I own. This is also where I store printed out copies of the recovery codes for most of the online accounts that I have.

There's a lot of weird fiddly shit that we have to have that we might not access all that often. This is the kind of stuff that might end up in junk drawers or under sinks or in disused laptop bags or kicking around under a bunch of papers in a desk drawer.

It doesn't matter so much when that weird fiddly shit is a set of hex keys or a utility knife or a protractor or a copy of a student handbook but it DOES matter when it's something that you might need to put your hands on in a hurry. If your computer crashes, you're not going to want to track down the software in the back of a filing cabinet and the backup drive from somewhere in the bowels of your desk. If you lock your keys in your car you are not going to want to figure out if your spare is in a junk drawer or the old purse where you keep semi-important stuff or the tin on your desk that has buttons and pins and headphone covers. Just put it in the Backpack of Important Shit and when you need it you know where to look.

So anyway, if you are a person who is a minor disaster who has trouble finding important things when you need them please don't think that you have to get your life together and have a nice organized filing cabinet or clear plastic bins full of documents or a neatly divided storage closet where everything from board games to backup drives has its own neatly labeled place. Just assign ONE LOCATION for important shit and start putting the important shit there. It doesn't matter if you have a filing cabinet where you keep old copies of homework and printouts of online orders and family history records - you do not need to keep everything that is file-able in one place and depending on what level of catastrophe you are it might be detrimental to you if you try to do that. It doesn't matter if you have a jewelry box where you keep your collection of gauges and wrist cuffs; if you are going to stress out about where grandma's ring is when you're digging through your collection of cheap earrings and silver pendants then *do not keep grandma's ring or any other Important, Vital, Cannot Be Lost jewelry in with your day-to-day wear*.

I live someplace that has fires. My binder got upgraded to my Backpack of Important Shit when the fires were getting uncomfortably close to the house I was living in and I wanted to have one bag to grab if we had to get out fast. Once I did that, I never took the binder out of the backpack and the backpack has now made three moves with me and has meant that I've had my birth certificate handy when I needed it in the middle of a move between two states, I was able to provide a history of my cholesterol panel going back six years to a visiting nurse, and I was able to give the exact names and contact info of my spouse's previous surgeon to the hospital when I had unexpectedly moved to a new state with three bags and my work computer at the beginning of the pandemic.

Get yourself a backpack of important shit and a folder of where the fuck did i put that paper. It is so much easier to search a backpack for important shit than to go through an entire house and it is so much easier to flip through a binder than it is to dig through a filing cabinet.

Anyway good luck and happy adulting.

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x-pair-o-dice-x · 1 year

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Hi! I haven't sent you an ask before (I don't really send asks super often)! I've only just arrived recently to ur blog but it's sooooooooooooooooo cool! What do you think you could say is your favorite trope? Or some ideas that may have been swimming around in ur brain that you want to share? Your writing is really awesome! I wanna hear your gremlin thoughts! Please?? I love hearing everyone's just clinging thoughts that refuse to leave their mind that they might not even write but might want to be able to read! Or daydream about! I know I certainly do~

I should send people asks more than I do but oh well

i’m a bit tired and i would answer this tomorrow,, but i feel like i’d forget this exists,, fkfmfkfkfjkfjf.

anyway- hello hello, mx. anon! welcome to my blog!

also fair,, i don’t send asks often, either,,, dkdmdkdm.

favorite trope, huh? i like accidental fearplay a lot! a little tiny being so scared of a giant,, unaware that the giant is just trying to help, or is confused,, or maybe even playing a little game with them.

i definitely have more,, but i’ve suddenly forgotten every trope that ever exists,, dodjdodjfk.

as for ideas… again,, kinda tired,, don’t have a lot. plus, been a hot second since i thought about making g/t content.

mmm.. i did have some small thoughts based off of e/pithet e/rased,, since i read the book,, but i never went any farther that haha funny daydream i think about like once and then never again.

#asks #i’d talk about it more but i don’t wanna accidentally show up in any tags #hence why i also censored it #the guy who created it is on tumblr and i REFUSE to have yet another content creator of a series i like look at my g/t works again #that already happened once with that one bench trio tiny alien drabble. i can’t have that happen again /lh gkgmkvmgkg #(also i am. So so glad that wasn’t a vore fic fifjKFJDODJDK)#anyway yeah uh. thanks for the compliment!!!#i’ve been focusing more of my creative energy on my main; rn- tho i’ve already posted links to two of the fics i was most proud of to here #if you wanna read more of my works; and haven’t checked out my non-g/t stuff;; i’d recommend doing so!#they’re a lot more polished than the stuff here is;; on account of them being the things i’ve worked most recently on #anyway i should prolly head to sleep now;; dkdmdkdmkd

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musical-chick-13 · 1 year

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what are you watching?

It's called Subete ga F ni Naru ("Everything Becomes F", or more colloquially, The Perfect Insider).

It was recommended by someone whose general taste tends to match up with mine, but I have uh...mixed feelings. To say the least.

I know that I'm a Grade A Cynic most of the time, but I do genuinely try to give people/media/ideas the benefit of the doubt (hell, I sat through all three seasons of Control Z, and I even enjoyed most of it).

It's really introspective, which I like. The main female protagonist is competent and pretty interesting, I even have a soft spot for the Broody Mentor Man.

I just don't know what this thing is doing. "Evil lady has DID." "Just kidding, it was a conscious choice to mimic other people in her life and become them to honor their memory" (or something???). "But also she might not have fully been in control of her actions?" "But ALSO also, she iNiTiAtEd and mAniPuLaTeD an older man into a """relationship""", who was a viCTiM oF hEr mAcHiNaTiOnS". "Other character has trauma they don't fully remember and there was aNoThEr pErSOn tHeRe tHe wHoLe tiME." Maybe it'll subvert everything and all these pieces of information are wrong and it'll vindicate itself by virtue of a three-act deconstructive narrative structure, like I REALLY don't want to assume the worst and condemn this thing before I've finished it, but...

Idk man, I'm just tired.

#I also don't mean to like. be a broken record about portrayal of mental illness in fiction #trust me I get that I'm REALLY close to that issue #but I'm willing to give people grace. and yeah this original novel came out in 1996 it's almost as old as I am #there's a lot of stuff we didn't realize/talk about then. but I've just. I've Seen Too Much. I'm so tired.#AGAIN. you can do this well. I have a list of 'mentally ill antagonists' I could recommend even!#it just gets to you when this is basically all you see all the time ever #multi t(ASK)ing #(also yes I have turned anonymous asks back on temporarily as a trial run for the next few days but I'll turn them off the SECOND #something Bad™ happens)#tw: abuse mention

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gimmeurtmi · 1 year

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no nut november — seungmin (loser #7)

pairing: kim seungmin x fem!reader

tags: no nut november mini series, established long term relationship, domestic bliss, ot8 inclusive, smut!!!🔞

warnings: swearing, matching nicknames, bants, breeding kink!!!, talk about babies/having babies, talk about getting pregnant theoretically, mention of birth control and condoms obvs, mention/use of toys, overstimulation, reference to cum as “dirty”, it gets sickingly sweet at some point in the middle, unprotected sex, kink discussion/negotiation

inspo: let’s just say this is self indulgent.

notes: in my defence i have none. also this is the last nnn from me and it’s been the most fun thing to write! i’m so happy so many of you have been enjoying it and i can’t wait to read the last one!!! mwah!

banner by @sluttywonwoo

{ wc: 5623 }

“So we can’t have sex for a month and then I can take you to that AirBnB your sister recommended,” Seungmin explained. He usually talked about weird things after spending an afternoon with the boys—but this might be a new record.

“I thought you were gonna take me there anyway for New Year’s?” You tilted your head to the side. Seungmin wasn’t one to forget plans you two made.

“I was, I mean—I am,” he corrected quickly, “this way I get to take you twice.”

“You could take me twice without having to play this stupid game,” you offered. He nodded, biting on his lip as he blinked at you—his bangs moving into his eyes.

“You don’t wanna do it? Because I’ll tell them they can go f—“

“—no, I wanna play,” you all but pouted, “if anything it would be funny. I don’t think any of them have dealt with as many tours as us. We’re practically pros at months without sex.”

Seungmin frowned his eyebrows at you, a look between disgust and concern painting his face. However, you weren’t wrong.

You’ve been together for more than two years, the longest in your group of friends and you’ve dealt with a lot of time apart from each other. At first it was hard, and then it got easier, and then it got hard again. But after going through more than three months without seeing your boyfriend in person (twice) you really didn’t even consider one month without sex so big of a challenge. When you explained all that to him, he laughed.

“Yeah, I said to them it can’t be that hard.”

“Well some of them are in their honeymoon phase still, they’re probably going at it like bunnies.”

“Speaking of,” Seungmin said, his face growing serious, “if we lose to Minho I will kill someone.”

“Okay,” you patted his shoulder, “we won’t lose, pups.”

“I don’t care if we do! But just not to him,” he emphasised.

“I’ll remind you of that if you’re ever close to breaking, then,” you nodded dutifully.

“Thanks, bubs,” he said softly, kissing you before he finally pressed play on your nightly Netflix marathon.

One by one Seungmin reported the boys losing. First it was Jisung (which surprised absolutely no one) and then it was Jeongin (which made you sigh in relief that he finally spoke up about his feelings) and then it was Hyunjin.

Just like that, almost two weeks have passed.

You weren’t counting. You only knew it was two weeks because Seungmin came over to help you with the groceries.

You lived alone—or rather, Seungmin lived with you when he was tired of the boys and then went back to them when you were tired of him—and so you didn’t need much in your house. You hadn’t had the chance to do any shopping this week since you mainly ate at work with how busy it was getting closer to the end of the year, and Seungmin finally decided to drag you out when he saw the two week old cartoon of milk still in your fridge.

“I’ll clean the fridge,” he offered since he knew you hated doing it, “and you make the list.”

He pulled the stool in front of the fridge and plopped down, already getting rid of the expired products

“Anything else, boss?” You rolled your eyes at him, but squeezed his shoulder in appreciation nonetheless.

He looked up at you, pursing his lips forward as he scrunched his eyes closed.

You leaned down to kiss him, exaggerating the noises as you rubbed his cheek.

“You’re very cute, pups,” you smiled at him.

“And you’re a slob, bubs,” he countered, showing you the very unappealing looking fruit you left in the drawer.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” you brushed him off, sitting on the ground next to him as he worked.

You looked at his concentrated face carefully, taking a moment to appreciate the simplicity you got to enjoy with your boyfriend.

“Stop eye-fucking me,” he said simply.

“I was not doing that! I was just enjoying the domesticness,” you argued.

“That is not a word,” he countered without looking away from his task.

��It’s a feeling though,” you shrugged.

He looked over at you, his judgemental eyes staring you down for only a moment before they softened. “So you were having happy thoughts?”

“Is that allowed?”

“Of course it’s allowed,” he giggled, “I just thought you’d start getting horny soon.”

“And why’s that?” You challenged raising your eyebrows.

“Well, it’s usually two weeks after I leave that you start calling me all desperate,” he explains his logic. You chuckle.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Oh, baby,” he starts, fingers raised towards his ear in the shape of a phone as his voice raises up to mimic yours, “I miss you so much, I’m so needy, please Minnie,”

“First of all,” you point at him, “I do not sound like that. And second, do I really need to remind you of the time you sexted me from the airplane to America?”

“That was a different situation,” he shrugged.

“How is me missing you after two weeks worse than you getting on the Mile High club by yourself after like four hours apart?”

“I wasn’t by myself, you were with me,” he explained as he closed the fridge.

“I was on the phone,” you counter.

“You were there in spirit. You’re always with me when I touch my dick.”

You blinked at him. “Uh, aww?”

He giggled, finally standing up and offering his hands to you. “Come on, let’s go.”

Walking through the grocery store was a familiar routine with Seungmin. He’d roll the trolley down the aisles as you’d gather the items around, keeping a slow leisurely pace so you wouldn’t have to rush around him. Occasionally he’d roll by something he wanted and grab at it, easily plopping it into the rest of the pile.

You were glad it was getting cold again, because that meant Seungmin wore one of his many oversized hoodies—grabbing the products between his sweater paws.

More than once you had to halt his stroll just to kiss his lips softly.

“You are getting horny,” he commented after the third time.

“I’m not,” you chuckled at him, “you just look very very cute like this.”

“With a hoodie that’s covered in the smell of your old mouldy food?”

You rolled your eyes.

“Can you never just take a compliment?”

“Can you never just take the loss? You got horny first, admit it,”

“I don’t remember that being part of the bet,” you raise your eyebrows at him.

“It was implied,” he shrugged, pushing the trolley down to the cereal aisle.

You decided to seal the bickering with a small slap on his shoulder, to which he naturally replied with sticking his tongue out to you.

When you stopped next to him to place the cereal in the trolley, he kissed your cheek.

“What else?”

“Shampoo,” you directed him towards the toiletry aisle.

There was a new brand on the shelf, and the bottle looked fancy, so you stood for a few minutes as you debated the now new option with your boyfriend.

He tried to explain to you that all of these were the same anyway, they just smell different, but that was of no interest to you. You had to pick the best shampoo.

Seungmin retired from the debate, using his time to try and catch a new Pokémon on his phone.

He rarely played it, and he wasn’t at all invested in the game like his friends were, but you were taking your time and he didn’t want to be too impatient.

When you finally decided to stick to the brand you always used, Seungmin got back to his slow stroll, absentmindedly grabbing a pack of condoms and throwing it in the pile.

“Why?” You chuckled at him.

“Because we’re out,” he deadpanned.

“And the bet?” You squint your eyes at him.

“Oh, shit,” Seungmin chuckles, “sorry, that was an instinct. We don’t need these.”

He picked up the small red pack, carefully placing it back on the shelf.

“I don’t understand why we need them anyway,” you start casually. It was something you thought about recently, when Seungmin stopped everything you were doing because he couldn’t find any condoms in the dorm. He later blamed Felix for that—but you were honestly just thankful for the early night on that particular occasion.

Still, you felt you’ve been together for a long enough time for that to not matter to him as much as it did.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean it’s not like we sleep with other people so I don’t understand why you insist on them so much,” you shrug.

“So, what, I should just get you pregnant then?” He scoffs at you.

You roll your eyes, approaching him with a sigh. You know he knows you take birth control—he’s the one who insisted on having an alarm on his phone too to make sure you don’t forget a day. He knows about your habit of turning off alarms instead of snoozing them.

You also know he knows you didn’t start taking the pills for your sex life but rather to make your periods more regular—but you still thought it might ease his strict view on condoms.

Still, he gave you the perfect opportunity to tease him and so you seize it, in the form of grabbing the front of his hoodie and pouting at him.

“Seungmin, please,” you mock the voice he used before by your fridge, “please put a baby inside me.”

His eyes gap.

“Dumbass,” you push at his shoulders. “You can’t. I’m on birth control and you’re the one who makes sure I never miss one.”

Seungmin remains completely still.

“You’re supposed to be the smart one,” you ruffle his hair before turning your back to him, making your way down the aisle to look for any beauty products on offer.

Once you leave his vicinity, Seungmin lets out a big breath.

He looks down at his crotch, thankful he wore black jeans today as he could feel himself growing harder and harder the more he repeated your words in his head.

You’ve never said anything like that to him before and the more he thought about it, the more he imagined you saying that while he was fucking you and not in front of a million bottles of shampoo. Then he realised he was leaking in his boxers.

When you ran back to him with a happy skip in your step, showing him the lipstick that was half price he simply smiled at you, nodding wordlessly.

As you cuddled up to him when the pair of you got into bed that night—Seungmin still couldn’t get your voice out of his head. He knew himself well and as much as he wanted to blame his body’s reaction on the fact that he simply didn’t cum for two weeks he knew that wasn’t true. It had nothing to do with that and everything to do with the thought of getting to cum inside you.

He never even considered it before—always going by the very important rule that sex should always involve protection, even if it was with the girl he knew he was going to eventually marry. And even when you told him about your birth control he didn’t consider not using condoms anymore an option. It would be dirty that way, and birth control wasn’t a guarantee, and if anything that just meant that you were using one more method of protection.

But now—his mind didn’t care how dirty it was. All he wanted was to feel you raw.

He wanted to make you beg for his cum, he wanted to make you say that again, tell him to put a baby inside you. Then he wanted to push you more, fuck you so many times your pussy was too full of his cum that he could barely keep his dick inside you.

He was fully hard now.

He groaned silently to himself, willing his brain to stop thinking about this and focus on literally anything else.

At least you were already sleeping—or else you’d be teasing him endlessly about being the one to actually get horny first.

Changbin. Chan. Felix.

“And Minho?” You asked, almost hopefully after Seungmin recalled the traumatic evening of Felix losing.

“No way,” Seungmin clicked his tongue, “that menace is strong.”

You knew from Minho’s girlfriend that they were definitely not having sex—but with barely a week left you wanted him to just break already so Seungmin would go back to normal.

Just like you didn’t expect Felix to last as long as he did, you didn’t expect Seungmin to not even help you cum.

Changbin’s now girlfriend was practically gloating when she retold the story to you at the last game night. All about how “giving” Changbin was before he officially lost.

You also heard from Han’s girlfriend.

It was the only time you hated how close you girls were—having to hear from each one of them how great they were all doing in that department. But it was okay. They’ll all see the Instagram posts from your romantic retreat and that would be your victory.

Still, whenever you asked Seungmin if he could at least touch you he stopped kissing you—saying he knew he wouldn’t control himself if he did that. At first you tried teasing him about it, but it stopped being fun when he simply said no and wouldn’t even tease you back.

There was only one occasion in which he indulged you, sometime before Chan lost, when he walked in on you taking care of the problem by yourself.

“I bought you that dildo for when I’m away, not when I’m in the next room practising,” he tried scolding you, but it wasn’t at all intimidating when his eyes didn’t leave your pussy once.

“Pups, I’m sorry but I’m desperate,” you whined, getting increasingly annoyed at the interruption.

“What about us being in it together? If I can’t cum you shouldn’t be allowed to either,” he tried.

You scoffed.

“You need me,” he added, realising his first argument did not take.

“The only thing I need you for is to make a baby. Other than that I can do everything by myself,” you smiled innocently.

You expected Seungmin to say a variety of things, knowing him so well you practically predicted his retorts before he said them. But you did not expect him to growl at you before he rushed onto the bed, grabbing your chin and kissing you until you couldn’t breath.

At one point he grabbed the dildo from you and fucked you with it until you came more times than you could count.

He made no smug remarks afterwards, just took care of you and then he went for a very long walk.

After that, Seungmin spent most nights at the dorm.

November 30th

You wrapped your arms around your boyfriend as he entered your apartment, bringing the cold air in with him.

“Pups, your face is freezing!” You yelped, before bringing your hands onto his cheeks to warm him up.

Seungmin showed his gratitude by trying to lick your hands.

You kicked his leg lightly before you ushered him inside, sitting him down on the couch.

“Order what you want,” you told him, handing over your phone as you brought your blanket out into the living room.

You didn’t even need to verbalise Seungmin was staying over tonight. You both knew as soon as the clock hit midnight (five hours to go) he would take you for as long and as hard as he could—just like he did whenever he’d come back home after a long time apart.

So until then you’d watch a movie, and maybe talk a bit, and maybe kiss until it was time.

“Done,” he said as the food order was confirmed.

“Oh! I’ll be right back!” You clapped enthusiastically, retreating to your room to grab the very important item still in your possession.

Seungmin squinted his eyes at you when he noticed you were hiding something behind your back—while failing to hide the grin on your face.

When you sat down beside him, grin unstoppable, you eagerly handed him the laminated coupon you saved for this very moment.

One Seungmin Serenade - to be redeemed monthly (T&Cs apply)

Said T&Cs were written on the back in Seungmin’s handwriting, such as “bubs cannot record them” and “don’t ask the same song twice” and “i’m not learning a new song for you” and “if you ask for one after redeeming this then you get no serenades at all don’t test me” and “one (1) additional coupon available on your birthday because i’m nice and unfortunately i love you”.

Seungmin groaned when he saw the ticket, grabbing it from your hands quickly.

“I was really hoping you forgot about it this month,”

“No, I was saving it for this very day,” you grinned.

“I hate that you laminated it,” he shook his head, “you’re a dork.”

“Perhaps,” you shrugged, “but you’re contractually obliged to sing for this dork.”

“You don’t look like PD nim to me,” he raised his eyebrows at you.

“Pups,” you said, as seriously as you could master, “this was your idea.”

“I thought it was stupid enough for you to not agree,” he defended.

“Then you underestimated just how far I’ll go to hear you sing.”

“Let me introduce you to an amazing app,” he said, pulling his phone out and tapping around it, “its called Spotify and if you search Stray K—“

“Kim Seungmin!”

His mouth gapped lightly.

“Not my legal name,” he muttered as he turned the coupon around in his hand.

“As the girlfriend I shouldn’t even have to use your dorky coupon idea and you should sing me to sleep every night—“

“—doesn’t work that way—“

“—you did that when we started dating,” you protested.

“Yeah,” he smirked, “to get in your pants. And after that worked I no longer need to do it every night.”

You slapped his chest, laughing as you said, “do you wanna go another full month, Kim Seungmin?”

“Why are you full naming me?”

“Honour my coupon!” You shoved at his shoulders, biting back your smile as Seungmin’s own smile took over his face.

“Okay, okay,” he grabbed your hands, stopping you from shaking him any longer, “pick your song.”

“Ghost,” you smirked.

“Ahh,” he pointed his finger at you, smirking right back, “you picked that in August so you can’t pick it again.”

“But I have this,” you raised your eyebrows for a moment, revealing one more coupon.

Free Pass - allows bubs to break a rule

“You can’t just make your own free pass!” He scoffed.

“Turn it over,” you all but wink.

Free Pass - allows pups to ask for anything

“Anything?” He blinked at you. “Like, sexual or..?”

“It can be sexual, if I’m comfortable with it,” you nod.

“No, yeah, of course.” Seungmin stared at the card, chuckling lightly when he sees the heart above the i.

“I can use it tonight?” You nod. “Okay. Then Ghost.”

Seungmin opens his phone, finding a karaoke video of the song. You place your head on his lap, like it always is when he sings to you, and close your eyes.

His voice surrounds you, his fingers in your hair, his stomach moving against your head as he takes in deep breathes before the higher notes.

When the song is over and the silence takes over the room again you lift your head up from his lap, wordlessly climbing into it as you wrap your arms around him.

His voice always makes you emotional, especially when he sings only for you, so he’s used to the Koala like hold you have on him once he’s done singing.

He simply rubs your back, indulging in the feeling of you so close as you calm down.

He isn’t used to what you say next.

“Pups?”

“Mhm?”

“When we have a baby will you sing them to sleep every night?”

He coughs. “Not every night. I’m not a wind up monkey.”

Good cover, he thinks to himself, but it’s taking every muscle in his body to calm his heart from how fast it’s beating.

“I’ll give you a baby and you can’t sing the poor thing to sleep?”

Focus.

“I think I need to give you a baby first,” he chuckled, swallowing as soon as the words leave his mouth. Wrong this to say, he knows, because now his dick is very interested in the conversation.

You notice instantly.

“Sorry, am I too close?” You offer, lifting one of your legs up to climb off his lap. Seungmin stops you quickly.

“No, no, it’s fine.”

“There’s only a few hours left, pups,” you smile, kissing his jaw softly.

“We’ll eat and then watch whatever you want and then officially win this bet,” he smiles back, rubbing his thumbs against your hips, “sounds good, bubs?”

You nod.

“Then we can start working on that baby you won’t sing for,” you roll your eyes dramatically—just in case your boyfriend doesn’t get that you’re joking.

“W-what?” Seungmin swallows, his mouth completely dry now and he doesn’t think it’s from the singing.

“I was joking,” you say quickly. “I’m still on birth control.”

“Yes, I know you’re on birth control, Y/N,” he shakes his head.

“Not my legal name,” you mock him.

He squeezes your hips as he looks down between your bodies, trying his hardest not to roll you against him.

“Can we, uh, I wanna,” he huffs, “let me tell you what I wanna use my pass for now just in case you’re not comfortable with it.”

“Okay,” you let the subject change slide.

Until you realise it’s not a subject change at all.

“Since when do you have a breeding kink?” You ask him once he tells you what it is he wants.

“It’s not a breeding kink,” he shakes his head at you.

“Pups, you want me to beg you for a baby while having sex. That is literally the definition.”

“I don’t want a baby now, I just wanna fuck you raw,” he tried to downplay it, he isn’t even sure why. Seungmin knows you aren’t judging him, you never do, but he never wanted something so badly before—and you saying no might actually drive him crazy. He wants to be gentle about this.

“Fine then be more specific,” you try, “do you just want to try it with no condom or do you actually want me to say the words?”

“The words,” he confesses slowly.

“And what words exactly?” You try, wanting to make sure you get his wish right. “Is it just ‘put a baby in me’ or is it like ‘I want your cum’ or something different like ‘paint my cunt’—“

“—shut the fuck up, Y/N,” he groans loudly, lifting his hips off the couch eagerly as his head falls back. He squeezed the top of your thighs incredibly tight.

“Right. So all of the above,” you note with a nod.

Just as Seungmin is certain he’s going to drag your body against his cock the doorbell rings, making you lift off him easily as you grab the food from the delivery man.

You calmly grab the food out the bags, grabbing plates and cutlery as you distribute the food between the plates.

Seungmin gets up from the couch and walks straight towards you.

“You’ll get the food in a sec, pups,” you chuckle at him.

Seungmin grabs your hands, halting your movements as he takes a step closer to you.

“Can we eat later?”

“Like, after the movie?” You blink at him.

“No,” he says, eyes dark and focused on you. It sends a chill down your legs. “After I fuck a baby into you.”

“Minnie,” you sigh, unable to ignore the way you felt his words deep in your core, “it’s almost nine. Do you really wanna lose so close to the end?”

“I don’t care,” he starts, grabbing your chin and tilting it upwards, allowing him to plant open kisses on your skin.

“But Minho—“

“—don’t care,” he mumbles into your skin.

“You specifically told me to remind you how you don’t wanna lose to him,” you try, although you aren’t sure what you’re fighting for anymore.

Sure it was Seungmin’s idea, but the thought of him fucking you raw was really fucking hot—and seeing him getting extremely desperate over it was enough to make your panties stick to your body with the wetness now coating them. It didn’t help that you last had sex thirty one days ago.

Still, were you really going to let him give up with so little time left?

“And now I’m specifically telling you to take your clothes off and let me.. what was it… paint your cunt.”

Yeah. You were going to let him give up with so little time left.

You crash your lips into his, swallowing both your moans into the kiss as the pair of you manoeuvre around your flat until you find the bedroom.

It doesn’t matter that you crash into a wall once or twice, or that Seungmin practically jams the doorknob into your back, because soon enough you fall onto the bed with him on top of you, pulling your clothes off like you’re the first sign of water he’s seen after a month in the desert.

Your hands tangle in his hair as you keep kissing—teeth clashing against his braces.

“Ow, fuck,” you groaned, pushing at his shoulders.

Seungmin understood what you needed, lifting himself up by his forearms.

“Let’s slow down for like two seconds,” you sighed, breathing in deeply. He nods, kissing your cheek softly before he takes a moment to catch his breath as well.

You look over at the clock behind him. 21:24.

“Are you sure?” You ask one more time.

“Ask me again and you don’t get to cum tonight at all,” Seungmin said, far too simply.

You groaned.

“Fine, but if I hear you bitch about losing to him once—“

“—mention Minho again and the same applies,” he dips his head between your breasts, wasting no time as he wraps his lips around your nipple. You whine softly, bringing your hands around his neck as you trail your nails up into his hair.

He hums against your bud before he pulls away with a small pop, trailing kisses down your stomach.

“Minnie, skip the fucking foreplay and just fuck me,” you groan. He looks up at you with a smirk but says nothing, instead pulling down his boxers.

You reach out for his dick, wrapping your hand around it and you both moan at the feeling. He’s heavy in your hand, and so warm, and you instantly pull him closer to you, aligning the tip with your entrance.

“You’re fucking eager,” he comments, having the audacity to tease you when you both know he’s the one who lost his patience.

You can’t even think of a rebuttal as he sinks all the way inside you.

You both breath heavily as you adjust to the familiar stretch, Seungmin’s eyes scrunched shut. You know better than to say anything, already feeling him twitch against your walls.

After a few moments he starts moving, much slower than you’d like, eyes still shut.

“This won’t be impressive,” he warns you, already losing his rhythm as his jaw clenchs visibly.

“It’s okay, baby,” you say softly, rubbing his shoulder, “we’ll use the vibe later if you need. Just want you to cum inside me first.”

“Don’t—“ he groans loudly, “—don’t fucking say that or I will seriously cum right now.”

“I won’t judge you for that at all,” you say sweetly, kissing his jaw as he moves closer to you, “this is the first time you’ve felt my cunt raw, Minnie, it’s okay if you lose your mind over how good it feels.”

“Your cunt feels so good like this,” he moans loudly, “so fucking warm.”

You moan at his praise. “Imagine how warm it’ll feel with your cum coating my walls.”

And that’s all it takes for him to groan loudly, pushing in impossibly deeper as you feel his dick twitching inside you—the warm feeling settling deep inside your stomach as he cums.

It’s a lot, his orgasm crashing into him so quickly, and he all but crashes on top of you, his dick still buried inside you.

You kiss his forehead as he calms down, his breath fanning against your chest.

As soon as it starts to even out you open your mouth to speak, to reassure him that you didn’t mind how fast that was, but a yelp replaces whatever words you came up with when Seungmin shoots up and reaches for the drawer in your nightstand.

He easily pulls out your favourite vibe—the one he bought you for your first Valentine’s Day as a couple—and with no warning he presses the toy against your clit.

He’s still inside you and with the vibrations against you, your moans leave you without you even noticing. Soon, Seungmin starts thrusting into you again slowly.

“There you go, beautiful,” he says, eyes fixed on the toy, “gonna let me fuck my cum deeper into you?”

“Fuck, Minnie,” you whine, “baby, please.”

He chuckles cockily, his confidence always skyrockets when he hears you beg for him. He flicks his wrist, moving the vibe from side to side quickly as he slows down his thrusts.

His cock reaches deep inside you, nudging against your most sensitive spot, your wetness and his allowing him to slip in and out so incredibly easily. When he leans down to suck on your collarbone you whine out.

“I’m close, I’m close,” you start chanting, so he turns the setting up on the vibrator—grinning as you all but scream in response.

“Go on, my love, I got you,” he encourages, and with one final deep thrust your walls clench around him tightly.

Seungmin doesn’t pull out, nor does he move the vibrator away from your clit, and after your second orgasm in a row you let out a strangled moan from the overstimulation.

“Off, off, off,” you squirmed, causing your boyfriend to quickly move the toy away from you and turn it off.

Everything around you is sticky and sweaty and wet—the mess between your thighs started to leak a long time ago, pooling on the sheets.

Seungmin planted kisses on your temple, slowly, giving you the time you needed to calm down from the pleasure.

The aftershock of two orgasms made your walls practically flutter, clenching around Seungmin a few times. He buried his head in the crook of your neck as he sighed deeply.

“Bubs, you have no fucking idea how good this feels,” he mumbled against your skin.

“Yeah,” you sigh, running your fingers up and down his back soothingly. “It’s a little weird, but it’s also really hot that I can feel it inside me.”

“Yeah,” he kisses your neck. “Wanna keep going?”

You decided whatever Seungmin asked for you’d give him. You decided that the night you realised you loved him, but you decided that all over again when he kept asking if you could keep going—insisting on making you cum at least twice after each one of his, growing fascinated by the way his cum would spill out of your cunt as you came down from your high.

After the fourth round, Seungmin finally tapped out.

He crashed on his back, hand tangled around your shoulders as he filled his lungs with as much air as he could get.

“Holy shit, Minnie,” you chuckle breathlessly.

“Holy shit indeed,” he shakes his head in disbelief. “That’s the best sex we ever had.”

“Oh, absolutely,” you laugh.

You use the very little strength you have to reach for his hand, intertwining your fingers with his.

The silence takes over the room when even your breathing becomes quieter—so quiet, in fact, that Seungmin knows you’ve fallen asleep.

“Hey, hey!” He shook your intertwined hands. “Wake up!”

“No,” you mumbled back.

“We have to shower after all that, bubs, wake up.”

“No,” you whined, “sleep.”

“Bubs, there’s cum everywhere. We need to change the sheets and clean you out and drink,” he reminded you, squeezing your hand. He leaned over, carefully, pressing a kiss to your temple.

Eventually you listen to your boyfriend and get up, cleaning yourself and the bed and finally eating the food you ordered. Your hand never leaves his, locked together tightly, as that is the one thing Seungmin asked for as his aftercare and you always made sure to give him exactly that.

When you finally get back into your clean bed—sometime before four in the morning—Seungmin mumbled angrily to himself.

“I’ll tell him tomorrow and that smug asshole can get his stupid win,” he seethes.

“Okay, puppy,” you chuckle at him. The only thing you could think about was the pleasure still tingling around your body, how you’ve known each other for so long and somehow he still managed to surprise you tonight with his stamina, about how hot that all was. But Seungmin was still thinking about the competition.

He kissed your lips sweetly, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Thanks for trying that out with me.”

“It was incredible, baby,” you grinned at him, “thanks for getting so horny over the thought of it all.”

Seungmin groaned in response.

When Seungmin woke up around midday he reached for his phone, checking the time. And maybe a part of him was relieved to finally see December on that date.

There were a few notifications waiting for his attention, but he opened the group chat first.

He sighed heavily when he read over Chan’s text that came in at six in the morning, knowing he sent it before he went to sleep and definitely not because he woke up early.

Bang Chan: so who won?

#nnn #skz smut #skz fluff #stray kids x you #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfic #stray kids x reader #skz x yn #skz x reader #kim seungmin #kim seungmin smut #kim seungmin x you #kim seungmin x reader #seungmin x you #seungmin x reader #seungmin x y/n #all.works

5K notes · View notes

rveyjules · 8 months

Text

A Second Chance

Pairing: RE6!Leon Kennedy x Prime Minister's Daughter! Reader (ft. Ada Wong)

Genre: Smut, Romance, Angst

Warning: cheating, Leon is obsessed with the reader, stalking, taking photos, the reader is cold but deep inside she’s a sweetheart, mentions of arranged marriage, pure smut (mentions of masturbation, foreplay, kissing, breasts fondling and sucking, markings, p in v intercourse, virgin sex, penetrative sex, Leon is huge [I think it's at least 9 inches, sheesh], creampie, aftercare)

Word count: 5.2k

Summary: As the eldest daughter of the Prime Minister and one of the faces of the family, you received multiple assassination attempts. So, your father hired someone to keep an eye on you. And to your surprise, out of all people, it was Leon Kennedy your father picked for you. You and Leon had a secret relationship but soon did not last because another woman came into his life. Now that the both of you meet again, will it be the start of chaos or a continuation of romance?

author's note: This story is entirely fictional. I do not know what the President and the Prime Minister exactly do for the country. Same with the occupation of being a prosecutor and the chief of the CIA. English is not my mother tongue so pardon if you encounter mistakes and grammatical errors. This is only for entertainment purposes only. And minors, please do your homework first.

—

It all started when you had an assassination attempt for the fifth time. Being the only daughter of the Prime Minister isn’t easy. The more your father becomes powerful, the more assassination attempts you receive because if the opponent can't attack the Prime Minister, their target will be his family and pick the most treasured and precious gem of his life, his daughter.

"The President will help to capture those bastards who tried to kill you." Your father spoke, looking at you, who was fixing the files from the CIA.

"Papa, this is the fifth time you told me that. All the men you hired to guard me ended up being fired."

"Because they failed to protect you," The Prime Minister replied in a strict fatherly tone. "This time, it was the President who recommended this agent to keep an eye on you."

"I hope he wouldn't think that I am being a spoiled brat and a baby when he found out that I am a prosecutor." You chuckled, shaking your head a little.

"Yes, you are a prosecutor. Not just a simple prosecutor. You are one of the most powerful prosecutors in the Supreme Court. You have access to every government agency as the Chief of the CIA. So, it’s quite understandable that those people who tried to eliminate you were not just because of me but because you are one of the most influential people in politics.”

You sighed and gave him a small smile. Your father has been stressed out with international political stuff plus your assassination attempt. And speaking of the President, both of them are best friends and they climbed the political ladder together. The President is personally closer to the Prime Minister than the Vice President. That’s why when you survived your fifth assassination attempt, it was the President who was one of the first people that paid a visit to check on you.

“Alright, I’ll accept whoever the President has to recommend to guard me. But Papa, I don’t want to be guarded all the time. You know what I mean. I need some private time.” Your father nodded in agreement.

“I understand. I’ll call the President.” With that, he walked out of your office and was escorted by his bodyguards as he walked down the hallway of my office.

—

“I heard our dads having a conversation about your assassination attempt. Are you sure you’re okay?” Your friend, Ashley asked in a concerned tone on the other line of the call.

“Yeah, I am fine. The assassin must have poor eyesight.” You laughed but Ashley only sighed.

“You’re still joking around as if you weren’t stunned when you barely dodge the bullet. By the way, my dad recommended the man who saved me from Spain. You haven’t heard about him, have you? Because you have three cases to finish.” Ashley chuckled.

“The two are successful, only the rape case left. But believe me, I was so worried about you. And don’t tell me his name. I love surprises.” You grinned.

“Oh, no. Here we go again with that behavior of yours. I think you know this person. Because when I mentioned you once in our conversation, he was surprised to hear that you are the Chief of the CIA and a prosecutor.”

“Do we know each other?” I asked, confused. Ashley hummed and chuckled.

“You’ll meet him tomorrow, according to the conversation between the Prime Minister and the President.”

With that, you started critically thinking about the person. According to your father, he’s a federal agent and was exclusively picked to save Ashley from an insane cult in Spain. But why did this person seem to know you?

—

“This is Leon Scott Kennedy. Your bodyguard starting today.” Your father, the Prime Minister introduced the federal agent who saved your friend from Spain and the one the President recommended.

And for the very first time, you hated surprises. This is the worst surprise you’ve ever had. Leon looks different from before. How long has it been since the Raccoon City outbreak? Fifteen years? Leon looked at you, scanning you from head to toe. You are wearing a black tight turtleneck knee-length dress, black high heels, and simple makeup but the matte red lipstick made you look bold. Your chest and curves perfectly fit the dress you are wearing. His gaze went back to you and swiftly rolled your eyes.

“Bodyguard?” You repeated, hiding your irritation because out of all people to become your bodyguard, why this fucking bastard? Why your ex?

Your father nodded his head.

“If he saved the President’s daughter alone from a deadly cult in Spain, then he can save you from assassination attempts.”

“Papa, that guy can’t predict if there’s someone who will try to eliminate me.” You retorted and your father gave you a disapproving look.

“We agreed on this already, Y/n. And this is an exclusive decree from the President. You are one of the secret weapons of the country so for him, it is also his responsibility to take care of you.” Your father reminded you.

“I know my job, Papa! You don’t have to remind me of that! Right now, I can’t help but feel embarrassed of myself that the Chief of the CIA needed to be guarded as if I can’t protect myself.”

“Y/n L/n!” Your father yelled, shutting you up. “For Christ’s sake, Y/n! Just for once! I am trying to protect you but you wouldn’t listen! And for the first time, you despised the man we selected to keep an eye on you. I mean, what’s wrong if this guy keeps an eye on you?”

His question made you pause. Your father must never know the reason why the hell you hated Leon so much. Even thinking about it makes your heart break. So, you looked down and replied against your will to not make this worse.

“Alright. End of discussion.”

Your father scoffed at your sudden change of mood and aura. He had never seen you glare and roll your eyes at the agents he picked to protect you. You are warm to the four guards who used to protect you. It was he who fired them when an assassination attempt occurred and those men failed to protect you. But now, he sees nothing but the fire of rage in your eyes when he introduces Leon to you as your bodyguard.

“Y/n, what the hell is wrong with you?” He asked.

“I accepted him already, Papa! Don’t ask me such questions again. Just fire him the moment someone fired a gun on me while he was nowhere to be found. Just like what you did to my former bodyguards.” You replied, turning your back on him so that he couldn’t see the tears forming in your eyes.

And then, the Prime Minister’s phone rang. He accepted the call and there was silence in the room so that he could have a proper conversation with the caller. After a few seconds, he hung up and looked at you.

“I need to go. They need me to discuss something in the White House.” He announced and you gave him a nod without sparing him a glance.

When your father left, you turned around and faced Leon who was looking at you the whole time, realizing that you are not the young girl he left for another woman back then. It’s true, he thought. You are no longer naive, eyes full of anger with the mess he made fifteen years ago.

“You changed, Y/n. After fifteen years…” Leon started which made you smirk.

“Unlike that woman who’s still manipulative. Bet you didn’t last.” You straight-forwardly rebutted and headed over to your desk. You sit on your executive leather chair and cross your legs as you rest your back against the backrest.

“Tell me, what’s your motive?” You asked sharply.

“It was the President who recommended me to the Prime Minister.” He replied but you shook your head in disapproval.

“You can decline but you didn’t. There must be a reason why you accepted the offer. The government needs you to save the country from bioweapons but here you are, standing in front of me as my bodyguard.”

“Well, I am protecting the country’s secret weapon so I think it’s considered. Besides, the President and I agreed that I will still work as a federal agent of DSO while guarding the Prime Minister’s daughter.”

Well, he has a point. You hummed in satisfaction with his answer and opened a file and checked the documents regarding the case you are currently in. There was a silence between you and Leon couldn’t help but feel your anger behind your calm expressions. No matter how much you tried to not make this personal, the pain he gave you makes it difficult for you to calm your nerves.

But Leon decided to give it a try…

“Ada and I were not in a relationship… or even on good terms.” He stated, causing you to grin.

“Not interested. Besides, you are nothing to me.”

You can feel that your words affected him but you don’t care. And there’s an awkward silence again until you receive a call from the Chief Prosecutor. At least it saved you from the uncomfortable feeling of being with your ex. You stood up and kept your documents in the proper places and grabbed your handbag.

You walked to the door but Leon moved faster to open the door for you. You ignored his presence and walked out of your office to the ground floor. Leon tailed behind you until you came out of the law firm’s building and your driver pulled up the car in front of you. Before Leon can move, you open the door for yourself and get inside the car.

Leon paused for a moment and shook his head and was about to get inside the front seat but you rolled your windows down and said…

“I do not allow my bodyguard to come to join me in my car so go join my other guards in the other car.” Leon scoffed and retorted back. “According to the Prime Minister, I shall join you in every vehicle you are going to ride.”

“Are you working for the Prime Minister or me?” You sarcastically asked.

He didn't want to make further arguments so he sighed and just obliged. You rolled your windows up and your driver drove away to your destination.

—

It was now nighttime. You and Ashley decided to hang out in a fancy bar in the city. You are staying in the VIP Room while your bodyguards are staying outside of the room, securing the area. You two are regular customers of the bar and the owner doesn’t mind if you two brought a bunch of bodyguards for safety purposes.

So here you are, sipping a glass of whiskey with your legs crossed and back against the backrest of the leather couch as you stare into nowhere in the room. It has been two weeks since your father hired Leon as your bodyguard. Having him around you during those days felt like being chained up again to your past.

“Hey, you’ve been staring at nowhere. Are you even listening to me?” Ashley’s voice snapped you back to your senses. You hummed and took the last drop of the whiskey before putting the glass down and pouring yourself another shot.

“You rarely drink whiskey, Y/n. What’s wrong?” She asked and you didn’t reply to her. Instead, you pulled a cigarette and put them between your lips, and lit them up before huffing out a smoke.

“Knew it. Something’s wrong. Was this because of your new bodyguard?” She asked and you hummed, huffing out another smoke.

“Tell me, Ash. Do you think my life right now would be different if I asked you his goddamned name before we met?” You asked.

“Why do you ask?” She asked too while you breathed out another smoke and sipped on your glass of whiskey.

“Because I could’ve stopped Dad from hiring him! That bastard has been getting on my nerves for the last two weeks.” You hissed.

Like your father, Ashley asked the same question. “What’s wrong if my dad recommended him and your father hired him to be your bodyguard? Y/n, Leon is one of the top agents in the country. He saved many lives and protected the country from bioweapons. And this is the first time you despised your bodyguard. You weren’t this cold to your former bodyguards until Leon came.”

There was another pause as you finished your cigarette and put it on the ashtray and drank your whiskey. Ashley continued, “Was I right? Do you two know each other?” She asked and you hummed again as the response. Even responding to her is difficult, especially when you're talking about the man who ruined you.

“We used to, Ash. We used to.” You replied, chuckling to yourself as you tried to stop your tears from falling. Ashley has been your best friend even before his father became the elected President of the United States of America but you don’t want her to see your vulnerable side.

“Used to? Like, he’s a part of your past?” She asked and you nodded your head.

“Worst part of my life, rather.” You sipped again, gulping the strong liquor down to your throat.

“You know, it would be nice if you would share your backstory with me. Even just the highlights, I’m sure I can understand it.”

“Ash, he’s my ex-boyfriend.” You frankly said. Ashley gasped upon hearing this from you.

She never thought that the man who saved her in Spain was your ex-lover. This is a shocking revelation for her. Ashley recalled the moments she mentioned you during her conversation with him back in 2005. Leon’s reaction was still clear in her memory when she told him that you are a prosecutor and one of the most powerful ones in the Supreme Court. He was completely surprised but then he was grinning moments later.

“No wonder why he was surprised when I mentioned your name back in 2005. How long has it been since you two broke up?”

“Since 1998. It was during the Raccoon City outbreak. After we parted ways, I never heard from him again and just focused on my studies.” You lit up another cigarette, putting the stick between your fingers and lips.

“Why did you two break up?” Ashley asked.

You paused for a moment. A lump formed in your throat and a tear slipped out of your eye. Your only way is to gulp down the whiskey in your glass. Ashley doesn’t want to force you to spill out the truth. Her point is to ease the pain in your heart. Seeing you struggling to speak is enough for her to understand that you and Leon did not have a good end.

“He’s a traitor,” You managed to speak out, taking deep breaths as you struggled to breathe.

—

Ashley had to go because her mother, The First Lady called because of curfew. She doesn't want to leave you in tears but you ushered her to leave, saying that you will be fine and enjoy the time by yourself. Ashley gave you an apologetic look before grabbing her purse, kissing your cheek, and leaving the VIP Room.

And there you are, having deep thoughts. You huffed out another smoke and groaned. You are not a menacing teenager who will do everything to get rid of Leon. That’s too immature. Ever since you graduated in Law and become a prosecutor, you promised yourself that you are no longer that young girl who’s sweet and naive. You need to be tough no matter how hard the situation is. No matter how much pressure a case gives you, you will do everything to win the trial.

Same as being the Chief of the CIA. Your hacking skills, high potential on battlefields, gunfight skills, and being a deadly agent made you reach your current position. None of the missions you had were easy. Most of them cost the lives of agents that failed to complete the mission. Only you are the last man standing. At the end of the missions, you’d always look around and see the pools of blood scattered around whether it is from your enemy or comrades. Dead bodies lay down on the bloodied ground. And now, the President takes you as the country’s secret weapon against the threat from other countries who will dare to attack.

Those events happened within fifteen years. You didn’t get enough rest. Your mind is so occupied with your job that even when Ashley was kidnapped back in 2005, you did not let your emotion take over you and continued pursuing your goals and fulfilling your responsibilities as a prosecutor and the Chief of the CIA. Leon never popped into your mind ever since. Now that he’s here again as your bodyguard, you couldn’t help but recall what pain he gave you in Raccoon City fifteen years ago.

Fifteen years ago in Raccoon City, things go wrong as you, Leon, and Ada encounter another group of survivors and now they are chasing you down to kill you. Ada, the most experienced one in fighting got shot in the leg causing her to fall to the ground. You and Leon are shooting them with your guns but he saw Ada get shot.

“Ada!” He yelled and shot those people who are after her before running to her to check on her. But there’s a guy who appeared out of nowhere and pointed his gun at Leon.

“Leon, duck!” You yelled and covered Leon with your body. A gunshot echoed around the road and you hissed in pain as the bullet hit you on your arm.

You growled and reloaded your gun as fast as you could and shot the guy right in the head. You took care of the rest of the people while Leon is busy treating Ada’s injury with a small medical kit he has. After a few seconds of silence, you lowered your gun and held your injured arm to stop the bleeding. You turned around and found Leon carrying Ada in his arms.

In your view, Ada was telling Leon that she’s fine and can’t walk, even including a phrase that it was just a bite of an ant. But Leon insisted on carrying her. It makes you feel jealous. Like, you are his girlfriend while Ada is just a random FBI Agent who appeared out of nowhere and saved Leon from infected dogs. Then, why is he treating her as if you are not around? Does he even realize that he was hurting you? Does he realize that a man who’s in a relationship shouldn’t act like that around his girlfriend?

So, to not ruin Leon’s time with her and to avoid making an issue between you in the middle of a zombie outbreak, you uncovered your arm, letting it bleed. You’re wearing a black hoodie so the blood isn’t noticeable. Claire will be here soon so you can treat your wound later. You wouldn’t die if you bleed and wait for Claire, would you? With a heavy sigh, you walked away, taking the lead while Leon followed you with Ada in his arms.

Soon, you found Claire with Sherry in a safe room. She was treating Leon’s wounds too while Ada was resting in the bed. While you are looking outside through the window. It was your only way to ease the pain and jealousy you felt. That shot could have killed Leon if you didn’t cover him. That could’ve cost your life too. This isn’t the first time you felt jealous. This is the tenth time you felt this way and you hate it. You noticed how Ada acts around Leon and she usually dismisses you. If she did, it was against her will.

You are in deep thought when you hear Sherry gasp…

“Y/n, you’re bleeding! Why are you not saying anything?!” With that, you gained everyone’s attention. Claire immediately approached you and found your arms bleeding.

“How could you not say anything! You’ll die if we don't treat this immediately!” Claire scolded you, rolling up your sleeves, and gasped when he found your injury bleeding more. She grabbed all the things she needed and started treating your wound.

You gritted your teeth as Claire took the bullet out of your arm and wrapped it with a bandage. Leon approached you too and attempted to hold your hand but you declined and said, “I can manage.” And there Leon realized that something was wrong.

Until one day… you find out Ada’s secret. Upon finding out about this, anger quickly rushed down through your veins and quickly grabbed your gun and pointed it to Ada and fired multiple times but none of the bullets hit her as it was your way to catch her attention.

“Tell us the truth, Ada Wong,” You growled venomously. “Tell us who the hell are you…”

“Y/n!” Leon quickly stood between you and Ada, facing you. “Put the gun down! What the hell is wrong with you?!” He shrieked.

“That bitch is fooling around us! She told us that she was an FBI Agent when I didn’t see her record on the FBI’s server! Stay away from that traitor, Leon!” You hissed, firmly pointing your gun at Ada.

Ada did not reply but there is no hint of worry or regret in her eyes. Instead, she glared at you. She stepped in front of you, never breaking eye contact with you. She then smirked and put on a smug look on her face.

“Traitor? Seriously? If you are just a student, you wouldn’t know how to access the FBI’s server. From the very start, I’ve been helping you and Leon. I’ve saved your life a lot of time and now this is how you are going to repay me?!” Ada hissed at you.

“For an eighteen-year-old student, it’s not easy to hack the FBI. What about you, Y/n? Who the hell are you?” She turned the tables around. She takes steps closer to you as if she was challenging you.

“Don’t change the topic, Ada. You’re working under Albert Wesker, right? One of the researchers and the reasons why the hell we are here in this damn situation? Too bad, Ada. You did not pass as the best actress.”

Then, Ada attacked you at such speed. Of course, you dodged her attacks and are more trained than her regardless of your age and state in the government. You may be just a student, practicing Law but no one must look down on you or even doubt your commitment especially when you are doing this for your team’s safety. The combat between you and Ada ended when you pulled the trigger and hit her on the waist. Ada grunted and you took the opportunity to take her down.

“Y/n, enough!” Leon pulled Ada away with such care which breaks your heart more. Claire was holding Sherry who was sobbing in her embrace.

“Leon, are you defending her?” You asked, feeling betrayed. Leon put Ada to the side for a moment before pulling you away to a more private room.

“What the hell did you just do?! You know that Ada is our key point to survive this damn apocalypse!” Leon hissed at you and of course, you retorted back.

“From the very start, I did not trust that woman even a bit! It feels like she planned to cross paths with us to gain our trust and take the samples because she is working for Albert Wesker!”

“Aside from accusing her, shooting her, how did you access the FBI’s server? We have only limited devices! We even barely called for help and now we found out that you accessed the FBI just to do some stupid research on her!”

“Stupid research? I did it for our safety!” You rebutted. “Leon… I don’t understand. Why are you being so protective of her? Why are you defending her? Leon, I am your girlfriend.”

Leon sighed. “You are. But these days, it feels like we’re not together. It feels like you are different from the girl I love. I… I don’t know you anymore.” Your heart shatters as Leon said those. Tears filled your eyes, your heart pounded against your chest, and a lump formed in your throat.

You couldn’t believe that Leon was saying this to you when you just want to protect him, to protect everyone. A tear slipped out your eye and you pulled yourself away. “Are you doubting me, Leon? Do you believe that the fake agent is your girlfriend?” Then Leon snapped at you,

“Don’t call her that!”

“Then what?!” You yelled at him. “You think I don’t notice your behavior ever since she came into our lives? That you are becoming more affectionate to her than me? That you will prioritize her over me? That night when those groups of survivors chased us and tried to kill us, I saw how worried you were for her that you insisted on carrying her when she just had a shot in her leg because of her stupidity, rather than me catching the bullet for you!”

Leon was taken aback by your sudden outburst.

“If there’s someone I truly don’t know anymore, that is you, Leon. Even thinking if I should approach you for help is difficult for me because your attention was on Ada. Tell me the truth, Leon. Is there someone else? Is there someone else who captured your heart away from me?”

He didn’t reply to your question. Seeing you in this kind of situation hurts him. But he couldn’t lie to you. His silence is enough for you. With a deep breath, you turned away from him.��

“I can leave, if that’s what you want. I know you very much, Leon. As a rookie police officer, you wouldn’t ride the same boat with the person you are doubting. But mark my words, Leon…” You paused but Leon interrupted you.

“You’re not leaving.” You turned to look at him and he was looking directly into your eyes. “We will survive this apocalypse together, I promise. Please, stay with us. For me….”

For his sake, you stayed. To not lose him, you swallowed your pride for him. Until one night… when you almost escape the damned city, things went wrong again. He broke his promise.

You woke up from being knocked out and there you found yourself cuffed in a chair. You looked out to the glass window and found Leon heading to the helicopter with Ada. And the sound of zombies banging outside of the room you are in made you panic even more. So, you forcefully pulled your hands off the handcuffs. You kept pulling yourself and your wrists started to bleed. Tears fall from your eyes, struggling to be free. “Leon!” You yelled and winced in pain until you successfully freed yourself. You banged against the glass to gain his attention.

He did. He looked at you who was crying, scared of death. The banging of zombies against the door gets louder and you look at Leon with pleading eyes as blood stains the clear glass that was coming from your wrists.

“Leon, don’t leave me here! Help me!” You screamed but Leon only looked at you with saddened eyes.

He had no choice but to leave you. Even if it hurts him to see you crying like a puppy, injured and terrified, there’s no other way but to leave with Ada. The woman in red noticed that Leon was looking in your direction. So, she held his hand and gave him an assuring smile.

“Leon, I know that this is hard but you need to strengthen yourself…”

What breaks your heart more is that he smiled at her before proceeding to walk to the helicopter. After connecting the dots, you realize they use you as the bait while they take the opportunity to escape. With that, anger rushed throughout your veins upon realizing that Leon just betrayed you. He betrayed you for Ada. Your hands clenched into fists while your wrists keep bleeding.

Leon gave you a last look and he saw nothing but pain and anger in your eyes as if you were cursing him for betraying you. There’s no point in turning back now. Call him selfish but he made up his mind…

And so he rides the helicopter with Ada, leaving you, scared and alone. Soon, the zombies break into the room where you are in. You ain’t going to cry and let those zombies eat you alive. On that night, you vowed to yourself that no matter what it takes, you will get your revenge on them. You used all the weapons you can use just to survive even if you’re alone.

Remembering how you struggled to survive made your eyes teary. You don’t want to be as weak as the person you used to be. That night when Leon betrayed you, another persona came into you. It made you more powerful. Having Leon back makes you feel like meeting your past self. A naive, sweet, and caring young girl who was now looking at a sophisticated, high-class, elite, and exclusive prosecutor and a superior of the country’s most powerful agency, the CIA.

You put your glass down and the cigarette on the ashtray before removing your black leather gloves and looking at the scars on your wrists that were carved on your skin. You still can feel the pain those cuffs gave you. When you survived and escaped that damned city, you started wearing gloves, not wanting to see your scars.

Anger rushed down through your veins. You grabbed the glass and threw it away with a growl, creating shattering sounds. There, you broke into tears. You rest your head against the backrest while you drape your arm over your eyes as you weep.

“I will make your life a living hell, Leon Kennedy.” You muttered under your breath before passing out.

—

Leon, who was patiently waiting for you outside the VIP Room heard a shattering sound inside. And there he found you, sitting on the couch with your head resting against the backrest with an arm draped over your eyes. He sighed in relief that you were fine.

“Is that how you throw tantrums?” He asked. You didn’t reply, not even moving from your position. Leon sighed again, realizing that you passed out.

The man approached you to pick you up but something caught his attention. Your scars. He moved closer to you and stared at your scars. It was carved around your wrists. Your skin was torn, he can tell that the cuffs he gave you back then have made you ruin your skin, desperate to escape.

Leon still remembers how you looked at him with a fire of rage in your eyes as your tears fell uncontrollably. When he looked at you during his introduction as your bodyguard, the flame was even worse behind your calm expression. The mystery of Prosecutor L/n's gloves is now finally solved.

Suddenly…

"Traitor…" Leon snapped back to his senses and looked at you. You are looking at him with hooded eyes. You stood up and grabbed your bag and gloves before walking to the door, without regretting telling him that. Because that's what he is.

—

To be continued...

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