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#Tuco appearance
starbuck · 2 years
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guys, i forgot to tell you the dream i had last night about better call saul where there was this random guy who tried to pretend he was some long-lost relative of the Salamanca family to get into Lalo’s inner circle and kill him and Lalo caught on to this immediately, and chose to expose him by dismissing every single other person they were hanging out with except the assassin guy and Nacho as like. a power move? before calling him out on it, and it turned out that the guy’s real name was Frankford?? Which was VERY important to the story for some reason. And he and Lalo started fighting in fucking hand-to-hand combat, and Nacho was just sitting there at the table like “why am i here????”
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etwlemon · 4 months
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sword-day · 1 year
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Now, that fella you just met with, name is Ignacio Varga. He runs with a connected crew of drug dealers. This deal he's doing with you, he's doing outside his crew. He doesn't want his bosses to know. So it was in his best interest that things go very smoothly.
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skeilig · 1 year
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watched the superbowl just long enough to see aaron paul and bryan cranston hawking some kind of chip, now I can go home
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poordrunkensoulll · 2 years
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aw come on guys
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15055034455 · 1 year
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do not make me write a five paragraph essay about the breaking bad superbowl commercial and its ironically oblivious commentary on how the drug trafficking industry is only superficially different from any other form of capitalism and regardless of whether you are selling methamphetamine or snack foods you are ultimately playing by the rules of the same insidious market forces
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dogtheories · 2 years
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now tucos shirt is also black and white . by the way .
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Ohhhhhhh shit he's still got the poisoned meth on him.
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anxiouscowboy · 3 months
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The Good, the Bad and the Ugly - Snow Headcanons
Bruh it snowed at my house and now I'm imagining how the boys would act experiencing snow for the first time.
Blondie - has the worst circulation of all time, gets cold and has to wear 3 sweaters under his poncho and ends up looking like a disgruntled marshmallow. He bought a matching earmuff/mitten combo but Tuco roasted him so he took them off.
Angel Eyes - 100% a Tik Tok man of destruction, kicks snowdrifts and throws icicles onto the pavement to watch them shatter to release The Rage. Hates snow shoveling with a purple passion and has to tunnel his way out of the house to get to his car.
Tuco - dude is LIVING for the snow. Catches snowflakes on his tongue, picks up handfuls of it and eats it, straight up dives into snowbanks, makes the gnarliest snowforts and snowmen and has an arsenal of snowballs that he uses to wage war upon his unsuspecting neighbors.
Blondie will waddle out to get the mail and Tuco will bean him in the face with a snowball, then duck and cover behind his snow fort because he knows full well what he's just unleashed. Angel Eyes appears from behind the fence and is subsequently caught in the crossfire and the snowball fight of the century ensues.
Bonus: at some point the trio calls a truce (Angel Eyes hit Tuco in the nose with an ice ball and Blondie fell down and couldn't get up because of all his layers) and they all go over to Blondie's house to drink hot cocoa and thaw out by the fire for a bit.
Bonus bonus: Blondie likes his hot cocoa with marshmallows, Angel Eyes likes his with whipped cream, and Tuco likes his with alcohol, marshmallows, whipped cream, chocolate syrup and sprinkles. The others are horrified. To each his own.
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genocidehim · 8 months
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tuco smut with his girly girlfriend while she's sitting on his lap
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notes: render is female, lewd, unprotected/unsafe sex words: 1507
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Tuco smiled upon seeing you enter his office, wearing that lovely short skirt he liked to see you in so much. Your almost shy expression ignited something within him without much effort on your part. He loved that you took the time to come to his dimly lit office above that tavern, a stark contrast to your delicate and feminine appearance. You were definitely a sight to behold.
"Ah, there's my beautiful girl. Why don't you come and sit on your old man's lap?" He greeted loudly, as if he had no shame in his eavesdropping henchmen on the other side of the wall. "Come on, sweetheart, come give me one of your kisses…"
His dark gaze followed your movements as you circled the desk and settled onto his lap, feeling the texture of his jeans against your thighs.
"Am I not coming at a bad time?" You asked as you leaned in to give him a small kiss on the cheek that would leave a trace of lipstick on Tuco's tanned skin. He responded with a smile and had no intention of wiping off the lipstick mark.
"No, princess, you never come at a bad time." His voice was almost as sweet as if he were a different man altogether. "You look gorgeous, have I told you that? You smell incredible…"
His large, rough hand snaked up to your thigh, caressing the soft skin it found there, as he savored your little squeal of excitement.
"I always try to look good for you." Your response made him grin from ear to ear, but when he leaned in to steal a kiss, you shifted on his lap to get a better view of the things on the desk. "Oh… Are you doing calculations or something?" You asked as you leaned in to better observe the notebook filled with numbers.
Tuco was lost in the full view of your stretched back and your ass pressing into his lap, too brazen not to notice. From behind you feel his hands go to your thighs and he begins to rub and caress your skin tenderly as he looks over your shoulder "Ajá, doing the end of the month math…"
A small shaky sigh escapes your lips as you feel his hands caress more and more of your inner thighs, noticing how you were even beginning to feel the growing hardness beneath you.
"Do you want to help me, little princess? I'm too busy enjoying you right now…" his purr almost threw you off, feeling your heart begin to pound harder.
You had no words to answer him, so you just nodded and leaned his arms on the desk so you could use the calculator properly and write down the numbers in the notebook. While you were trying to concentrate on putting the suffrages into the calculator, Tuco took the time to touch and grope your body with his eager hands and under a dark look of lust. At some point he brings his hands to either side of your hips and presses you against him, his growing erection pressing directly with your pussy protected by only the thin layer of your panties that were already almost soaked.
"Tuco, you shouldn't…" his voice came out in a halting gasp which you couldn't moderate, already at that point you couldn't manage to control your body well in the face of his insistent touches.
"Shh… Keep working princess" He shut you up almost instantly, tightening his grip on your hips to emphasize his point.
Although you were trying your best to concentrate on all those serums and letters that kept the month's expense account, it was hard to keep a clear head as you felt Tuco rub his erection against you and let out low little grunts that only managed to darken your mind more. You felt him lift his back from his chair and press his chest against your back, seeking to reach your ear before whispering; "Mmm baby…. Why don't you ride me right here?"
His very direct words always managed to make a certain warmth cover your face, and this was no exception. You could feel how needy he was, his erection throbbing beneath you, his hands gripping your hips so hard you knew he could leave marks there, plus his low growls that managed to make you shiver.
"We're in your office-…"
"Don't worry about it, sweetheart…. No one would dare come in here without my permission" To incite a response in you, one of his large hands snakes up to the junction of your thighs and lavishes gentle caresses to increase your desire "Come on princesa... You know I want you too much to let it go."
You turned to watch him over your shoulder and that was enough for the last ounce of self-control he possessed to disappear. He was quite appreciative of the visit you gave him when you rose from his lap to give him a chance to free himself. At your nervous and needy gaze, Tuco unzipped his pants and he removed the button that contained his painful choice, as you pulled down his pants a little and he his underwear, he made his length jump proudly and tearfully from where it was confined; his cock throbbed with need as a small drop of precum spurted from the tip and slid down the length of his length, you could see how his swollen veins were a visual reminder of the need he felt for you.
At your eager and hungry gaze, he moved his hands away from his groin and directed them to your ass, lifting up your skirt, which he loved so much so he could observe your panties. His right hand took over holding one of your buttocks, while his left moved the thin, wet fabric aside to reveal your pussy glistening with arousal.
"Oh princesa… You have no idea how eager you make me…" His grunt came accompanied by gentle touches of his thumb, caressing the folds of your pussy, enjoying the wet sensation you leave on his fingers. "Come amorcito, sit on top of me… I let you have the initiative."
A mischievous smile crossed his face as he watched you hesitate, catching your nervous gaze on top of him. Tuco let go of your buttock and brought that same hand towards the base of his cock and purred "Don't be shy, princesita…. I know you like to ride my cock" He reminded you with some mischief as he moved his length, teasing you as you watched his cock throb with desire.
Although you were nervous, the provocations on his part made it not long before you found your place in his lap again as you leaned against the edge of the desk, Tuco helped you by guiding his length to your entrance and a small moan of satisfaction left his lips as he felt your wetness cover his tip, only wanting to penetrate you in one lunge to hear you whimper, but he held back and preferred you to set the pace. When your warm, wet insides hugged tightly, he let out a sigh of satisfaction as he watched his cock disappear inside you.
"Fuck baby… You were so ready for me" He complimented you as he rested his hands on your waist, caressing the soft fabric of your skirt as he buried himself deep. As you began to move on top of him up and down, Tuco closed his eyes and tilted his head back as he enjoyed the great sensation of your pussy receiving him so well "That baby... Move a little faster, don't be afraid."
"T-Tuco… Ah…" You were trying to stifle your moans with your hand while with the other hand you look for support, heeding his orders and increasing the speed of the friction, feeling deep as he pounded with his own onslaught, pulling his hips up to take you deep as the pace increased.
Tuco's eyes darkened at your barely restrained reactions, eager to draw more sounds of pleasure from you. "Don't stifle your cries, love… I want to hear the pleasure I give you, be loud" at your restrained moans, one of his hands snaking down to your groin to caress that sensitive spot inside you that was completely unraveling you.
The lewd noises of your skins slapping with each thrust and your moans heightened the excitement for both of you, and at that moment he watches as you shatter on top of him, arching your back slightly and feeling your walls rippling along his cock as a loud moan erupted from your back. The sight and sounds of your release stimulated his, and with one final powerful thrust he buried himself deep and spilled his warm, thick seed inside you.
Both panting wearily, you felt Tuco rest his forehead on your back as he recomposed himself, taking a few final thrusts so you could get every last drop of him.
"That princesita… You always know how to milk my cock well…"
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talonabraxas · 1 year
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KNOW THY SELF Know thy self beyond the veilthrough the fire, towards infinity,let your light appears ,beyond the masks of the egolet your true nature becomes apparentas a gemstone to shine. Tuco Amalfi
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starbuck · 2 years
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I had another BCS dream about a cat… why am I so determined to put a cat in this show??
#also i have now dreamed about All of the Salamancas - so that’s fun#Nacho was in this one too…#it’s kind of hard to explain the plot because it didn’t make any sense#but basically there was concern that this cat could somehow be used as evidence against the cartel#because it had gotten loose and been taken in by a well-meaning local pet store#(i think my brain was channeling dr.acula daily re: the SPCA trying to adopt Dracula - tho in this case it was just a normal cat but#just Also potentially evidence somehow)#so Eladio (who was also in this dream) wanted Nacho to keep an eye on the pet store#and presumably eventually steal the cat back before anyone figured out what was going on#but i woke up before things could go any further#unclear if this was the same cat from the previous dream - which was Hector’s cat#i mean i guess that would make sense… probably not the intention of my tortured subconscious but i’ll integrate that into my worldview#still entertained that my brain just Decided that Hector would be a cat person… very honestly i stand by that one#Tuco was also in this dream - but he was not part of the cat subplot#or not directly anyway… it was all connected somehow#Lalo’s the only one who hasn’t appeared in a Cat Dream so far…#in the dream he was in - he was trying to fake his own death but in a different way than in the show#there was no body double available to him so a lot more elaborate nonsense was involved to make it believable to both the twins and Gus#and i don’t remember most of it - but it entertained me a lot regardless#if i EVER have a depressing bcs-related dream i’m cancelling my dreams forever#but these silly nonsense ones are highly cherished and encouraged#this is my subconscious’ way of Coping i think 😂😂#bcs#(like. not really… but in case anybody’s blacklisting it lmaooooo)
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seadem-on · 2 months
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Beauty and the Beast AU where Tuco is the Beast and Blondie is the Beauty.
The Beast is a prince who was cursed with a horrible appearance - he doesn’t care much about that tho, the thing is he was also cursed to stay confined to his castle and his woods. He wants to roam the world and wreak havoc but he can’t. Blondie’s not a harmless maiden tho. He is a man who has been an entitled prick all of his life, hunting freely in the woods of the Beast, who one day decides he has had enough. The Beast hunts down and almost kills the Beauty. He leaves him to die until a witch passing by wants to trick both of them and brings the Beauty to the Beast telling him that the only way to relieve the Beast of his curse is by making the Beauty live. So the Beast has to unwillingly take care of him. Of course they start out hating each other. The Beast is surprised at the frailty of the Beauty - the way he moans and whimpers when he is touched, so he has to handle him very carefully. It’s gonna be over soon anyway, he tells himself, while actually feeling that his loneliness has finally been breached, that the presence of this small whimpering thing is comforting, and keeps him busy, and he is growing fond of him, worrying about his health and thinking of ways he can make him feel better. The Beauty is still selfish and entitled but also charmed by the glimpses of humanity that shine through the hardened shell of the Beast - that tell him of the Beast’s loneliness and need to be loved. One day when he has finally healed completely he finds out he doesn’t want to leave because he fell in love with the Beast. The Beast is happy with his decision cause he fell in love too. The witch lied cause the Beast stays a Beast. But he is happy like that as I said. They live happily ever after.
Is that anything. Is that anything. Is that anything.
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meme-streets · 3 months
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dollars event day 7. prompt: justice (content warning: implied law enforcement violence) ---
The first thing Blondie sees when he rides into town is that they’re building a real gallows.  That changes his plans.
He keeps on slow, trying to keep up a facade of detached innocence as he discreetly surveys his surroundings.  Past a wide, squat jail with an alley round the side. The sheriff saunters out on the porch.  He's a big brutal kind of a man, yellow-headed.  Behind him like lean hungry dogs slink two mean-looking deputies with glinting eyes and bruises on their knuckles.  Like a reflection of someone knew once. “Howdy, stranger,” says the sheriff over-amiably. Blondie stops the horse.  “Howdy.” “Coming along right nicely, ain’t it?” Takes him a second to realize what that’s about; he follows the man’s gaze to the scaffold.  “Mm.  Looks like it.” “Not long now till it’s ready.”  That’s self-evident. “She’s a beaut,” says one of the deputies. Not a word Blondie would ever use for it, but all he says, with a touch of irony just for him, is: “Sure.”  He tips his hat, and before any of them can make any further attempt at conversation, he starts back on.  There’s work to be done.
~•~
Tuco’s cooling his heels in a cold, stinking jail cell trying to figure on a way out when he hears the first inklings of a commotion.  It’s a distant shout at first, but sure as the sun rises it grows steadily, becomes a clamor of voices out there in the night, some commanding, some frantic.  “Aw, hell,” mutters one of the deputies, “I’d better see what that’s about.”  He and the other converse mutedly, and then he leaves.  The remaining man eyes the jail cell nastily and then settles back down at the desk.
Not long after comes the low, muffled boom of a far-off explosion, prompting the other deputy up sharply from the desk.  Tuco wonders if the war’s found this place so soon.  
The clamor multiplies quickly; it sounds like half the town.  New light comes faintly through the high, barred window, wavering and orange.  The deputy paces and curses and paces and looks at the window and paces some more.  Tuco feigns sleep.  He swears he can feel the man’s eyes on him. “Shit,” the man says, and leaves.
A beat.  Two.  Three.  Tuco waits till he’s certain, then rises quickly with a low grunt of pain.  This is his break.  He scans the desk, picks out the keyring, then scans his cell for something to try and grab at it with.
A face appears in the window and startles him backwards.  A familiar face, when he looks, and stunned, he opens his mouth. Blondie holds a finger to his lips.  Tuco mouths at him wordlessly, trying to make some kind of sense of what he’s seeing, but he doesn’t speak.  Maybe he’s dreaming.  Or, hell, maybe that two-faced sonofabitch has just come to gloat one last time.  Yeah, that sounds right. Then Blondie’s wedging a kind of a metal hook round the bars of the window, and just before he drops back down, he winks.  Alright.  So it is a dream.
There’s a clatter of hooves, of wheels, a thunderous groan of straining rock and metal.  A crash, and open air.
~•~
The cell wall collapses into the alley exactly as he’d planned, the horses clattering onwards still trying to drag the thing behind their hitched cart; hurriedly he frees the chain attaching the hook and lets them go off into the street. Tuco stumbles out into the alley, his eyes wide.  He moves stiffly.  Blondie thinks of the deputies’ bruised knuckles and bites down hard on his cigar.  There’s no time for getting mad now.  He’s got a second horse waiting and he jerks his head for Tuco to mount, half-wondering if he’ll have to pull him up in his own saddle.  But with a wince, Tuco manages it. They ride.  Rounding a corner, they catch a glimpse of the buildings he’d set ablaze, crowds watching and crying out, the fire squadron trying to douse the inferno.  They plunge onwards into the dark, and no one sees them leave and no one follows.
Tuco, mercifully, waits until they’re well out of town before he starts yelling.  Less mercifully, they’ve dropped to a pace slow enough he can hear it in full. “Blondie, what the hell are you doing here?” “Oh, just saving your neck.  Again.” “Saving my neck.  Yeah, after what you did–” he stops.  “What the hell?” he says again. Blondie doesn’t answer.  Not much of a question anyway. “Why–how come you were in the right place at just the right time?” “Just lucky, I guess,” he says, and deigns not to mention newspapers and wanted posters skimmed in every town, ear pressed to the rumor mill.  It’s still not untrue. Tuco huffs.  After a minute he says, without malice, “You really are a two-faced sonofabitch.” Maybe so. It strikes him, then, the realization: Tuco hasn’t yet broken off to go their separate ways.
They make camp in a low scrubby wood and sit round a low fire with the night huddled very dense and very black around them and they look at each other sometimes across the flames or just stare into the fire.  Blondie’s doing a lot of the latter, biting down too hard on his cigar, trying not to fidget.  He thinks Tuco’s eyes are on him.  He hasn’t checked in a while and he hasn’t got the nerve now.  Beneath the crack of wood he hears the occasional shuffle of movement, adjusting and readjusting.  Antsy.
The line in the territory between justice and murder is thin. They both know. Wanted dead or alive is dead sooner or later, and the lawmen don’t take their time. The old rope-cutting con had relied on that: any bastard trying to make a buck could be judge, jury, and executioner, and if not him then someone else the next morning if he drug his bounty in alive like Blondie had. In and out of town in a flash. Judge, jury, and executioner.  Blondie’s killed half a dozen men for Tuco now and he’s not sorry for a single one.  
“What are you thinking about?” Tuco says at length. He wants to go back and kill those three sons of bitches.  Which is plain foolish because he can’t. “Nothing worthwhile,” he says, which is true, and Tuco scoffs but lets it go. They lapse into silence.  The night presses thicker and thicker at their backs.
“I’ve never been busted out of jail before.” That does make him look up.  Of all Tuco’s bullshit stories there’s a scant few he figures might be true; one was of a judge’s wife who’d been so enamored with him that she’d broke him out of his cell in the night.  He had mostly believed that because it sounded believable, because Tuco’s dodged death more than any man ought and he can charm his way out of just about anything.  Blondie’s loathe to admit it but it’s sure worked on him. He opens his mouth before he can think better and then stops, wonders if asking would just salt the wound. “What,” Tuco says tiredly. His eyes narrow, cautious.  “You said something once about a judge’s wife...” He barks out a laugh, harsh and sudden.  “And you believed that?” Blondie looks down.  Maybe it’s the fire but his face burns. “You of all people oughta know,” Tuco mumbles after a minute.  His voice is almost gentle. “Yeah.”  He doesn’t try to explain himself.  No point.  After a long minute he says, very quiet and half-strangled and for no good reason, “I don’t like lawmen much.” He can feel eyes on him, piercing, for a long beat. “You used to be a bounty hunter.” Now it’s him who laughs, almost sheepish.  “And you believed that, huh?” “Weren’t you?” He shrugs.  “A little.  Here and there.”  He sucks in a breath, lets it out in a slow sigh.  “Heart wasn’t in it.” Judge, jury, and executioner.  Sometimes he wishes it bothered him more.
A long minute passes.  Across the fire, Tuco stands, and Blondie stiffens.  He’s not sure what he expects.  Maybe for him to saddle and mount and ride off into the night.  Maybe just for him to bunk down for the night.  Not for him to walk round the fire and stop in front of him, wavering in the orange gloom.  Blondie stares at his boots. “Blondie?” He looks up at last, one of the few times he’s ever been able to do that given their heights.  The look on Tuco’s face is raw and indecipherable.  It seems like a question but Blondie doesn’t know what he’s trying to ask.  Then he toes cautiously at the dirt by his side, and Blondie nods slowly, shuffles over to let him sit.
A long time passes before he starts to lean.  Slow as the moon scraping cross the night sky; it feels half an eternity before their shoulders first touch. Blondie lets him.  Doesn’t move with it, stays firm against the pressure growing against his side.  At long, long length, he slips an arm around Tuco and leaves it there.
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asgardianangel · 1 year
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You are mine (Lalo Salamanca X Fem!Reader One-shot)
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Summary: Lalo finds out someone is interfering with his business and gets obsessed.
Warnings: Bad language, choking(near death), forced kissing and touching, chasing, Lalo is pretty dark in this one, implied collaring, nicknames (puppy, little girl),implied murder, Lalo kinda obsessed
“Someone is fucking with us” Blizz urges looking over at Lalo who appears to be deep in thought. It had been over a week now and the business is facing attack. Dealers would come back to the diner without the calculated or no profit at all. It was fun watching Ignacio break a few bones, but Lalo could not withstand someone taking his money no longer. The men around the gambling table thought Lalo would be pissed off with it.  
But he seemed to be intrigued. 
A chuckle erupts and Lalo looks at the men “Explain to me again what happened?” he asked no longer bothered about the game of cards they were playing he lifts both legs and places them on top of the table. 
From what he understood at the end is that it was a lone wolf with a grudge on his business. Nothing to do with Fring. This was someone new. 
At the end of the night, he decided to take a stroll down to all the areas he claimed (as well as his cousin Tuco’s business). Addicts there told stories he could barely make out, but they all had something in common.  
‘Someone in all back and wearing a face scarf’. Sneaky enough to jump and climb into windows of dealers and steal their stash. Only in the areas he owned. 
Lalo couldn’t really explain the thrill of someone other than Fring interfering with his business. 
“cabrón valiente (brave bastard)” He whispered under his breath 
Lalo then remembered that Krazy eight is going to investigate that problem on fifth street. So, he called up Ignacio. 
He was going observe. 
This night was special, and you knew it. Waiting and watching in the shadows you heard loud obnoxious music blast throughout the street. 
“Junkies” you whisper with a shake of your head seeing them arguing over ‘not getting their crystal’ the woman nicknamed ‘Mouse’ you had come to learn was pissed off and joining in on this argument. Giving you a good chance to strike. 
Pulling up your dark hood and scarf you sneaked over to the back of the delict building. You were lucky that climbing was your expertise the perfect skill for this kind of job.  
But it wasn’t really a job no. It was personal 
You climbed noticing a gap in the bordered-up window (just the right space for you to fit through). You breathed carefully looking around making sure nobody has spotted you (but you still heard the irritating argument of the junkies). When got inside the place was empty all except from a desk chair by the window.  
“Bingo” 
On closer inspection you found a metal tin under the seat which contained a full load of crystal. Chuckling you tucked that nasty shit in your bag and looked around for anything else. 
Money maybe? That would seriously piss them off. 
You would kill them all in time. Every last one. 
Too busy investigating you were caught off guard by the blaring sounds of police sirens.  
“Fuck” you cursed slinging your bag over your shoulder and moving towards the window you came through. Freezing a minute, you saw an officer walk by with his torch in hand. 
You took the opportunity to climb down when he disappeared before they could ransack the place at any time. 
You quieted down catching your breath and moved on trying to get away from the building without been seen. With a quick peak over your shoulder, you sighed in relief as they were too caught up with arresting a familiar man. 
‘Where the fuck have, I seen him before?’ The question ran through your mind, but you pushed it aside.  
The headlights of a car shined in your face out of nowhere and your eyes made contact not one but two familiar men. One you couldn’t remember the name of but the other was... 
Lalo Salamanca. 
You were in a state of panic, but the click of a car door handle activated your flight mode again. You ran like a rabbit only hearing your loud heartbeat and soon heavy footsteps behind you. Sure, you prepared for a situation like this you thought you would at least get chased down by one of his men  
but never Lalo Salamanca himself!  
You were closing in on wooded area hoping you could lose him but there was no stopping him. 
“te voy a atrapar! (I’m going to catch you)” You heard his determined but cheerful voice yell out. You steadied yourself almost tripping on a branch you looked over your shoulder to see Lalo hunting you down without anything stopping him.  
Fuck the guy was huge. 
You concentrated dodging trees and branches (even more difficult in the dark) 
And soon you were his prey. 
Lalo didn’t want this cabrón to escape his clutches huffing like a mad man he hurled himself on top of you (an action that could only be describe as animal like). He wasted no time flipping you over on your back as you tried to fight to fight back. But he was quick to restrain your wrists with his strong hands. 
He practically ripped the face scarf off revealing you to himself like a prize. He was taken back for sure as he sat himself on top of you. 
You were a woman. A hermoso (beautiful) woman. 
Chuckling in disbelief he moved one of his hands from above and caresses your face. 
“Get off of me!” You finally emitted your voice in distress, but Lalo only laughed again. “So, you are the man in black my men have been talking about?” he teasingly asked.   
Lalo moved his face close to yours “you are just a   niñita (little girl) with nothing else better to do” he spoke softly. Lalo felt a hard blow of a rock to the face, and you tried your best to scramble only to be pinned down again. 
“Where do you think you're going niñita?” Lalo asked placing a hand around your neck giving it a squeeze. You certainly had a lot of fight in you. 
He liked it. Enjoying it even. 
“Fuck you!” you cussed out at him with a whisp of breath causing him to chuckle “if you ask politely   bebé” he told you. 
“But first we need to talk” Lalo hushed moving his hand from your throat. Before you could even fight him again, he picks you up and slings you over his broad shoulder (like you weighed nothing).  
You beat your hands against his back but it didn’t effect him he grabbed your bag and then
he carried you throughout the woods to his car.
Being tied up in the backseat of Lalo’s car you listen to him sing some song and converse in Spanish to the other man “if you are going to sing to me just, please put me out of my misery” you comment only to earn an amused look from Lalo. 
The car ride was long, and your wrists started to become sore. 
Where the fuck are they driving? 
Lalo must have read your mind “I’m taking you home with me querida” he told you. 
“fuck’s sake” you cussed struggling against the restraints. 
“Hey, no ninita should speak like that” he sternly said causing you to laugh. 
“ella necesita aprender algunos modales (she needs to learn some manners)” he spoke to the guy driving. 
“We’re here” He then said you could barely lift yourself up to look around. There was a tap to the window and Lalo rolled it down with the biggest grin. 
“encontré a mi chico (I found my guy)” Lalo chuckled making quotations to the word ‘chico’. The man outside the window hummed in surprise and gestured for the big gate to be open. 
‘This is what trafficking drugs and murdering people gets you’ you thought only managing to see the lavish the house coming into to view. 
Lalo enthusiastically opened his door getting out and started greeting people leaving you and the man ‘Ignacio’ in the car alone. 
“You shouldn’t have done this you have no idea who you are dealing with” He warned you. 
“Why can’t he just kill me already? Get it over and done with” you asked. 
“He doesn’t plan to kill you” He simply replied. 
You were so confused and was about to ask why? But Lalo soon swinged the backseat open with a whistle. 
“Hey! Hey!” you kicked your feet like a child having a tantrum. But this didn’t bother him at all. Lalo just pulled you out to show you off to the very surprised strangers next to him. 
“This is my gardener my cook and my cleaner” he started to begin an introduction like the circumstances weren’t weird at all. Feeling anxious as Lalo pulled you back against him with a chuckle.  
“You never mentioned your name querida how rude of me not to ask” Lalo scolded himself moving strands of hair away from your face. 
“I don’t want to asshole” You seethed out debating whether or not you could bash your head back onto his face and make a run for it. But by the look of those heavily armed guard dogs of his you wouldn't make it that far. 
“ella tiene fuego tu sabes? (she’s got fire you know?)”  
This man is a fuckin manic. 
“Let go of me!” you scream only to be slung over his shoulder again and carried you inside 
You were unable to bang your fists against him as Lalo headed upstairs with you whistling another tune. He walked towards the door at the end of the door and swinged it open. Revealing a bedroom. 
“I’m going to put you down now so be good for me” he told you. 
“Okay” you whispered out in defeat secretly planning the next move. 
Lalo places you down onto the bed you watch him drag a chair from the other side of the room to sit on. “Soooo- what’s a ninita such as yourself have against me and my business?” Lalo asked placing both hands to his lap. 
You took a look around thinking and then a snap of his fingers caught your attention “No no no eyes on me” he told you. 
You huffed putting your tied wrists in front of you “could you please untie me first?” you asked ‘nicely’ Lalo scratches his chin then sighs untying them you winced rubbing the sore of your wrists bringing your legs on to the bed to sit comfortably. 
You thought back to the time you hated the most and looked Lalo in the eye “you killed my friend” you simply said.  
“That’s it?” Lalo asked  
Is he fucking serious right now? 
“You have no compassion, do you?” you asked back shaking your head. 
“Who was this ‘friend’?” he questioned you looked away not wanting to meet the eyes of this monster any longer.  
“James Ward street name Flynn you shot him down in the street like some dog” The venom came out with the explanation. 
“Oh, he was a fuckin snitch querida” Lalo simply chuckled. 
“He didn’t deserve to die” you answered sharply. 
Lalo pointed a finger at you and spoke again “you are putting yourself in a life and death situation sounds to me bebé like Flynn was more than a ‘friend’” Lalo explains with another chuckle. 
The fucked-up part is that he was correct. You did love James more than a simple friend and the news of his death shattered you.  
“Look if you are going to kill me do it already. Alright?” You spoke kind of hoping he would. 
Lalo just gazes at you in sicking grin. 
“Your plead to kill you is very attractive to me querida” Lalo hums. 
You could never get over how crazy he is 
He then gets up and joins you on the bed to which you shift away from him. But Lalo wanted to be up close and personal “If I were to kill you, do you know how I would do it?” he asks caressing your ankle and you shake your head. 
“How would you?” the question came out in a whisper as you looked away. Lalo grabs your face and made you look him in the eye “Well-” his hand traces across your cheek to your neck and he grabs a hard hold of it causing you to wheeze “I would grab your pretty neck and squeeze until your last breath to come out” 
He squeezes harder “beautiful you know?” he tells you close (to the point you could feel his own breath on your face). He laughs lightly seeing your natural skin turn red as you try to hold onto life while he sits on top of you. 
Then he lets go. 
You gasped for air desperately feeling weak and dazed to the point you didn’t notice that Lalo was kissing your neck. Trying to stop him you slap your hands against him, but he only groaned when finding that sweet spot. 
Sucking as if he was some sort of vampire. 
“From now on you are mine”
  You couldn’t help but moan you hated yourself for it. 
"You may as well forget that dead boyfriend and think of me" Lalo soothed hand reaching up to your breast under your jacket.
“I would never kill you ninita” he whispered in your ear so intimately. 
“But I’m going make you wish I did” Lalo rubbed the rawness of your neck and got off of you after giving you a deep and unwanted kiss. 
“We are gonna wait till that pretty neck stops hurting and then-” Lalo opens one of the bedside drawers and to your horror he revealed a dog collar. 
“You are going to be the beautiful house perrita (puppy) and what to name you” he wondered  
Fin
Thanks for reading I hope you enjoyed it
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bettercalllacho · 6 months
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End of Lachoweek2023 but not the end of this brilliant fandom.
I've been a huge fan of Nacho and when Lalo appears in 4x8, when it first aired I got the sense he would be another type of Salamanca. I felt immediately deeply fascinated by Eduardo. My favorite in BB was Gustavo Fring and Lalo Salamanca in BCS is "the Gustavo Fring of BCS", I'm talking as the main villain and his level of smartness, cunningness, charisma, charm. He's so badass!
I've been a fan of Nacho and Lalo separately then, felt that underlying tension between them. Yes Nachito was already "marked" in BB as the traitor and in BCS we cried with him, knowing he made mistakes but was good at heart. He wants a new life, with his dad. Who could not stand with Nacho through the seasons ?
"It wasn't me, it was Ignacio"
But I was wondering, what would happen, will Lalo learn the truth about Tuco and Hector ? No because he was really too blinded by Nachito. Funny knowing Lalo is so smart, the creators of BB/BCS even compared him to Hank Schrader but from the Cartel.
I saw the beginning of Lacho fandom and his continuation, and I've loved all the eras when S4, S5, S6 aired. And even when the show ended, there were still new fans, wonderful people and artists. We've got theories, analysis, fanfictions, arts, videos...
I want to thank you all for your devoted past and present works in this community of fans. This week eased a bit of my pain, because I've lost someone dear to me recently, in a tragic way. So seeing all these fan works was helping me to think a bit about one of my passion.
I can't wait to see lachoweek2024 after lachoweek2023. Love you all and take care of you and your relatives.
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